Transcript
Speaker: comfortable, like. We're already going. Right. And getting comfortable. You can always splice and dice later. Yes. Okay. um Sound checks, I guess, are a thing. How do we sound? Okay, let's see.
Speaker: I mean it is... Is it picking up both mics? let's make sure test test test test test test i think so test test yeah because it's like Reacting to me. professional podcasters.
Speaker: Wait, say that a little bit louder. Professional podcasters. Oh, yeah. Okay, good, good, good. Yeah, we know what we're doing. What are we called? Hey! We have thoughts.
Speaker: Oh. We have thoughts. I think I do like that. I do. Because we do have thoughts. A penny for them. Some people don't always want your thoughts. No. And that's okay. you know I am learning that at 40. You know what's actually really interesting about that statement? is I've learned now.
Speaker: How? Actually, you know what? I was gonna say... What have you learned? i think I think people actually do. want to know our thoughts. until we share them. And then...
Speaker: that's That's what I feel like I've learned in my 40s. ah which is all... um yeah For you, like one, two months? Two months. two months March. Newly minted.
Speaker: so mine's I've been 40 for five months so in my extreme knowledge of being 40 for five months um What's fun is. We have thoughts, I have thoughts, and finally...
Speaker: I don't care who likes them Do you remember? I can't remember if it was the office or. Perks and Rec. Okay. and Somebody, it was one of those kinds of shows if it wasn't one of those.
Speaker: and they would start everything with no offense but. And they would say something incredibly offensive. And somebody finally stops him and says. You can't just keep saying no offense. Like there is still an offensive thing about to come out of your mouth? Yes.
Speaker: Um. But I will say I have spent the first 40 years of my life trying to bite my tongue. Not always successfully. Mm hmm. But trying? to bite my tongue. and I am now realizing you can you can diplomatically say something and share your thoughts. You are very diplomatic.
Speaker: one I really think so. Also. we havet is Are we going to dip our toe into politics when we talk about this? We're on our podcast. oh I think that's that's part of we have thoughts. I, you know what? Well, and here's one of the reasons that I actually.
Speaker: Love. the idea Like, like the more and more I think about where this podcast could go being the two of us, I'm really excited because.
Speaker: Your... The way you expressed your views. All those years ago when we met and then. me watching you live your life. was a huge part. of my Broadening.
Speaker: Well, I wish I knew what I said. You want to know what I think? can't believe i'm gonna be the one that is about to say this because i do like to talk so much I think it's...
Speaker: you You were. you were, um What's that word when you are like... solid in your beliefs. Solid in your beliefs. Okay, let's just go with that. You were.
Speaker: what you but but it's not confident, but you were confident about. What? you cared about. Oh yeah. Yeah. and That.
Speaker: was so... interesting to me because it was so different than anything i had ever been raised to believe and you but you were so you were confident about the things you cared about.
Speaker: And then the way you lived your life was. the same. authentic to those authentic to those beliefs And so I was like, wait, here's this girl.
Speaker: who is telling me she cares about x y and z And then I'm watching her live it. And she is. None of the things I was always kind of.
Speaker: raised to believe that Democrats were. Right. Well, and I think when I was about... 30 or so. I think both kids were born by then.
Speaker: Um, I had this realization that God gave me a great big heart and a great big mouth and I got to use it. I love that. And as long as you're doing your best to.
Speaker: Bee. Kind and fair and good and loving. And you do that. you're doing an okay job. Yes. Not always a great job. No. to be fair i feel like i don't do a great job half the time But then also. That is actually where, as I look back.
Speaker: And I finally have some grace for myself. where I was always thinking that I was not doing a great job is actually when I look back where I was doing the best job. you know, like Again, in my.
Speaker: five months of being 40 and all the wisdom that I now have in these five months. of being 40, like really I look back and I can. and there's also a lot of therapy a lot of I'm doing EMDR right now, which is new for me to be doing that kind of that kind of therapy I've been working with your mom. um that i'm sure y 'all will we will Y 'all will get to know Nancy through just our stories, even just stories, um, doing energy work with Nancy and like.
Speaker: You know. very very slowly dipping my toe into like having compassion for myself And like looking back. where Yeah, where I... like you know how how how so many times like women will be like oh look at that picture remember like remember in that photo i thought i was fat you know like right If only I could be.
Speaker: as thin as I was when I thought I was fat. Yes, exactly. So like when I look back and I'm like, whoa, in those photos, I thought I was such a terrible mom. And like.
Speaker: Now I look back and I'm like. oh wait actually That was when I was doing some of my best momming. you know but like you don't know that when you're in it right because you feel like you're drowning you feel like you're drowning
Speaker: You feel like you're drowning. Yes. So let's back up a second. Let's back up a second. I was thinking the exact same thing. And that is we have thoughts. We have thoughts. Okay. More and more. I'm like loving that. I we've tried it on a couple of times. I know it's good. We're still, yeah, we're going to, you know, still workshop it a bit, but.
Speaker: i kind of think it i kind of think it really does um Summer's up. It does. in ah In a quick way and also doesn't box us in. So anything. I'm going to go ahead and introduce myself. Go for it, girl. I cannot wait. And I'll interject.
Speaker: Because I do adore this woman. So I will. So I'm Emily Shearer. Um, I am a Richmond. Native. who um previously owned the Guild in downtown Richmond. um I am.
Speaker: Fairly involved in nonprofit work, host of Born in the Bend. a another podcast that is Fort Bend centric. We have the podcast guru with us. guys is what i'm gonna say Just to chatter, really. Listen. You know, I usually have my production team clean me up. yeah Fantastic. So you get a very authentic Emily here, on we have thought. That's exactly what I wanted.
Speaker: It's like the the after hours version. Yes. so You can listen to Emily on Born in the Bend. Also on. Zach and him or him and Zach. Easy does it. When we finally launch that. Okay. Well, I can't wait. I cannot wait. We've done a few like mini video versions. Okay. Fantastic. But I think we're going to finally, or I can't reveal the name. Oh, don't do it. Yeah. um but it is there's there is a food product in the name. Oh. love that deals with our
Speaker: meet cute story i suppose oh my gosh okay love that okay also i i interjected to make sure y 'all knew We were with. an expert here. So. Don't judge me too harshly. Listen.
Speaker: We don't do that. And I'm assuming your listeners already know you, but I want to hear how you introduce yourself. Okay. But also I feel like we are, well, also I cut i kind of cut you off, so keep going. Oh, I don't know. Well, I guess okay I'm a traveler, a wife, a mother. Oh, you do. Yep. Yep.
Speaker: I... undiagnosed adhd yeah parent of a middle schooler and high schooler. So I am wow newly minted 40 struggling to find my identity as a mother and a human being.
Speaker: So. Obsessed. There you go. Obsessed. um Okay. So my name is Katie Higgins. I own. EK the Boutique.
Speaker: Wear the energy, share the kindness. um It's almost 10 years. um No. No. And what's so interesting to me is. um Well, okay, one thing you'll... we'll for sure be talking about is the Lindsay Clancy trial. And so we, Emily and I are both like heavily locked into this and. Because I have.
Speaker: struggled with mental illness and been open about it with with my platform, with my boutique. um there has been so much of what she went through that does feel very similar like by and by no means am I um what what this woman has endured is.
Speaker: Um, Pure hell. It is not a lonely path that she has walked. I think so many mothers yes and women have walked something similar. Yes. Maybe not with the same outcomes. Yes. And that's what I and that's what i was. So thank you you. You said that much more eloquently because I don't want, by any means, I don't want to say like, oh, well, I'm Lindsay Clayton. No, like. what this woman has gone through and what she's living through right now like i do not want to um Say that I'm you know, my outcome was different and I was very lucky I was very very very lucky. yes um
Speaker: But yeah, you can definitely see by the outpouring of women. that we've all had we we can all i think they're almost every mom. It seems like if you look at TikTok social media. the the outside of the courthouse yesterday that there So many women are touched by this because they're like, wait, hold on. We can see ourselves in a part of this story. Yes. um So.
Speaker: I have been doing a lot of reflecting lately Because of. the Lindsay Clancy trial and the things it's been bringing up, memories it's been bringing up. So when you say, I did have a reason for this. So when you say, oh my God, can you believe it's been 10 years? The answer really and truly is no, I can't. And as I've been.
Speaker: doing a lot of reflecting just very recently. um also because i'm in emdr so it's bringing up old memories And. I am like, wow, I've lived a lot of life in the last 10 years. I think the last 10 years has truly been, I do think, not that I think.
Speaker: um Like, oh, smooth sailing from here on out. but I think. I lived a lot of life in the last 10 years. And I think that's an understatement. Well, thank you. I mean, just knowing. Just knowing. ah In a nutshell. Yes, yes. What you've gone. Well, and and and thank you. That means a lot to me.
Speaker: um Because also you similar, you know, you, and that's one of the, one of the reasons i I value our friendship so much is because. We both have walked through some some tough stuff.
Speaker: And. also then still choose to... appreciate things that are beautiful. you know and um all of that so but i've been doing a lot of reflecting over the last 10 years and So I own EK the boutique. It's EK has had.
Speaker: Um, as many seasons. in its 10 years. and many eras, if you will. if you will the taylor swift of richmond boutiques the taylor swift of richmond boutiques i will mean I will.
Speaker: Take that one. Okay, I'll put that on a... billboard um And...
Speaker: I really, it it has been. just a lot of learning. And I'm so grateful where I'm at now. uh, 100 % I'm still in a lot of tough circumstances and that's what's so cool about growing. and going through hard things which god that just sounded Like.
Speaker: crazy. And by no means do I mean that in a toxic positivity sort of way, but like. going through the hard things has just made me so grateful. and seeing life in a different way.
Speaker: And I would never give that up. even though the last 10 years have been extremely difficult. So... So, my name is Katie. I own EK the Boutique. I strive to look for the beautiful. I strive to look for what I'm grateful for in the midst of... of some some dumpster fires.
Speaker: Upon dumpster fires. Well now yours sounds really poetic and good. Well, yours was more. Um, quick bio quick bio which i should Let me quick give you the quick bio. I'm also a mom. I've got three kids. My teen my my my identical d twin girls, Mary and Maggie, turned 13 on Wednesday.
Speaker: I officially have three teenagers. No. I know. I know. I don't allow it. i Basically. And i because it was their 13th birthday, I was like looking at all these photos. We played this really fun game at their birthday party, actually, where.
Speaker: we would throw up photos on the... TV. And their friends had to guess who was who. Because they're identical, you know? oh that It was, it got to be, it was really fun. And we had great prizes. Like, hey, mom owns a boutique. It's going to be good prizes. And.
Speaker: So I'm like, I am so fully like, where'd my squishy baby go? go Or where do my squishy babies go? The back to school photos this year with Facebook reminding me. It's killing me.
Speaker: it's It's been horrible. Okay. You're ahead your're reading pop -up things on the screen. Okay. and it And it popped up and then it said reconnected, right? yeah Okay. We've had some technical difficulties the last like three episodes that I've recorded. We've lost the entire audio. So I'm just trying to pay attention. this time.
Speaker: So, you know, um so that's kind of my quick, I'm married, I'm married to my husband. Um... Three kids. My son has autism. He's going to be 15 in a month. And. um Oh, don't you worry. I'll make sure the more poetic version of you comes out.
Speaker: Don't you worry. ill Don't you worry. Because... uh there's a lot of um is would nostalgia be the right word that's the wrong word I feel like there's a lot of, um, I don't know where you're going with this. Okay. and Like, yeah, that's ah man. I always tried. I need, I should, I should get like a vocab app.
Speaker: Word of the day. Something like that. Yeah. Because, okay, what I'm trying to say is like, when I look back over our history of when we first met and then. how we have like how our relationship and friendship has grown to like this point here. Right.
Speaker: I feel like there was a lot of. Oh! Shall I say foreshadowing? Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Like, I feel like as I look back, there were so many places in our friendship relationship that we had that it was like.
Speaker: Oh, it was definitely pointing to a point where we would we would get closer. A little kismet. A little kismet, if you will. Because Kismet is like meant to be. You're kinda like serendipitous.
Speaker: Oh! Love that. Okay. Justin tells me I make these words up. I might. I don't know. I feel like they're real words. I think serendipitous and kittismen are both words. I think so. Yeah.
Speaker: I feel like. I'm like... you know super confident drop us a comment i guess if i used it inappropriately seriously let us know Or if you know a better word for what I'm trying to describe, what we're chatting about, please let us know. Yeah.
Speaker: I would love to know some new vocabulary. yeah Okay. All right, so. We have a little bit of an agenda. We do. We're going to find out how closely we follow said agenda. Heck yeah.
Speaker: Most likely, since we have thoughts, we'll go off on some tangents. But that's also kind of my favorite. Okay. So... So let's start a little bit about how did we get to the place where you're sitting here with me?
Speaker: um You texted me during Sophie's 12th birthday party as I was listening to girls shrieking. Oh my God, I'm obsessed. forget the noises that come out of 12 year old girls it's an incredibly special noise i I think my ears are still bleeding. yeah um And ah you texted. And yeah I said, you know what? That sounds like a cool. great time okay You said, hey.
Speaker: Wanted to start a podcast together and I said, i yeah. Yeah. he yeah And you said, no, it's only fun and laughing and having a good time and chatting. And I said, absolutely. Well, and I think I do, I'm going to hold you to this, that you said. Will there be a beverage involved?
Speaker: Yeah. So so are by no means are we promoting any type of beverage. Just for us, though, we like a certain type of beverage. So when I started season one of Born in the Bed. Yeah. First episode or two, super awkward and uncomfortable. i And I finally just looked at Amy and I said,
Speaker: ring yes yes because if you want just chatty m uh -huh let me tell you a glass of wine i'll get you there it'll it it suddenly becomes so much more interesting now and i will say though once once you do get like Cause it used to be like with the boutique, when I would go live, I would need something to get me going. And like, now I'm so used to it. Like I could do it. I can do it without a beverage and I can still be like.
Speaker: the personality or whatever, but man, it does help. It does. And I think in this scenario, it's very much a cocktail catch up. And I don't get to see you as much as I would like to because you are so busy running an actual legitimate business. And I am just farting around town.
Speaker: i I would so disagree with that, but I'll let you believe that. Sometimes I cart around town in a different town, too. There you go. so ah There you go. so yeah okay a little cocktail ketchup a cocktail ketchup i've never heard that and that's perfection Well, I mean, it is what it is. It is what it is. And it's how many times do we as mom, Hey, can you meet me for. a coffee or a glass of wine exactly and that's exactly um so yeah so you texted and I will say I.
Speaker: uh up until recently was heavily involved in the community. Yes. And as a pillar. As my children. And I don't say that jokingly. Well, like it came off like I. It might have come off with a little joke, and so but but you are a pillar of our community. A bit of an um imposter syndrome over here on that, but we'll let it slide. Okay. All right. um But I was heavily involved and my children were starting public school for the first time in sixth and ninth grade.
Speaker: And I felt. These sweet babies, they are going to need me. um And it's going to be all consuming. And we're going to walk to the bus stop together. oh my And we're going to braid each other's hair. And Owen, I don't, I mean, he doesn't.
Speaker: Obviously let me braid his hair. Sure. Nor will he raid mine. But they're going to need me, right? Yes, definitely. And I'm going to be there for them. They don't. They don't need me. um and The downside of raising good kids.
Speaker: you know they're They're fine. yeah they They are fine. And so I have this wide open schedule yeah and nobody needs me. And Katie said. well i need you Oh, would yeah, I do.
Speaker: I want you to come have a drink with me. Heck yes. Well, and and chat. and um It - Tell me, ah ah you may be further along. in your maturity with this But.
Speaker: I sometimes struggle because I own a business and um And to be completely. frank um we've had we've had at the boutique, we've had ourselves a hard year.
Speaker: and I sometimes don't like to be honest about that on a on a public level because I am so staunchly opposed to um Pity sales type of thing.
Speaker: And so when I say this, especially in this. um environment of a cocktail catch up and a podcast of this sorts.
Speaker: um I don't feel. like it's going to come across. the wrong way and it'll come across as just like If I'm having a conversation with you and as, um,
Speaker: A business owner? And then you've you've had a business and run a business and you've run multiple nonprofits by being on a board and being heavily involved in events and planning events. Like, so, you know, so like.
Speaker: businesses are going to have ups and downs. Businesses are going to have good years and bad years. And so. um but that is also comes with 10 years of owning a business i know like i can have a conversation about like hey it's been a hard year because this has been hard And like, that's not me asking for pity sales. Right. And I think I have a reputation enough as well with my company that everyone knows I'm not doing it. Well, it's being authentic and vulnerable. Yes. And I mean, and that's what it is. It's not.
Speaker: Please. Please buy from me. Yeah, because to be fair, actually, I'm also like. Well, I've also learned this far in. Like. It isn't a please buy for me. it's It's truly like, no, do you love what I sell?
Speaker: And if so, if it like connects with you, then amazing. But if not. then it's not for you and that's okay because The - customer that does resonate with me it's going to be a like a longevity and a mutually benefit. beneficial relationship between me and that customer, you know? So I feel comfortable, but, but I do find myself in the trap.
Speaker: where I'm like, oh. Okay. I own this business. I love this business. We've had a hard year. And so then I struggle sometimes with like. taking time out to just spend time with friends right and so But you also, I think, are an entrepreneur at heart, like have that in you. And so when I did text her this, because i i've I've, the podcast has been through. Like.
Speaker: I feel like the podcast is like. Tried to get started. And then not so much. Tried to get started again. Not so much. But I think it's because.
Speaker: This is what it was meant for. It wasn't meant to be a boutique podcast. right It was meant to be a podcast. about. just life.
Speaker: and being a woman. And. And just fun and a cocktail ketchup like cocktail ketchup. That's what it was always meant to be like that that. I think it's kismet that here we are. Now that I know that word, you're gonna hear me say it 17 times. I love it so I think this is what it was meant to be. And so now I'm like.
Speaker: okay so so i text emily though but at the risk of being like um Like I didn't want to scare her. because I knew she was in this era of like. retirement but she also knows i haven't learned how to say no yet well but also i also knew though Out of respect for her and like not wanting to like. put something on your plate that you couldn't say no to. I also fully knew.
Speaker: That what I was asking you to do was not going to be like. taxing. taxing. Like. It hopefully is going to be fun. Yeah. So. So when I texted her that.
Speaker: I also was kind of tiptoeing around it. Like, do you want to like host with me sometimes? I know. After I said yes, she continued to try to pitch it more. I know. Like I said, yeah. I know. Don't make it weird. even Even till just now, literally. Like, I'm like. Wait, so like.
Speaker: you're for real you want to be like my official like we want to be officially co -host together and she's like yes and I'm like okay what should we name it We have thoughts. We have thoughts. Which really is so good. so That's how we have found ourselves here. And what you are listening to is now.
Speaker: Episode 1. of Emily and Katie. We have thoughts. Oh I think that was good. i think we just nailed that. is what I'm going to say. Okay. I'm a professional, okay? You freaking are.
Speaker: You are. ah Emily and I are, though, both those types of people. I think you could throw us in front of a crowd. so when i told justin about this justin's okay yeah You'll hear about him a lot.
Speaker: ah So he's a pilot. And I am telling him, oh yeah, I've got to record a podcast with Katie on Friday. He goes, uh... Is this like a show? And he said, I don't know.
Speaker: And he said, are you doing it like all the time? I don't know. What platform are you going to be on? I don't know. And I can see he is getting. stressed out.
Speaker: Sure. By this conversation. Stephen, this would send Stephen into an early grave. What time is it? I don't know. I'll check in with her. um And I finally looked at them and I realized. For Justin's work, he has to know.
Speaker: every variable every piece of data oh every single thing right like his job is to Take an airplane from the ground, get it into the sky full of people. and safely Yeah, no, that pressure, that pressure would be.
Speaker: He needs to have all of the information. Yes. I need to know, can we drink during this? That's literally my... I think that was my only question. It really was. and My.
Speaker: My reaction to that was, oh my God, finally someone. who is only concerned about that. Because listen. we Julia will be on here eventually eventually because I do adore my manager, Julia. She manages my brand.
Speaker: ek the boutique we're just going to say that she's going to come on when i'm out of town that's and i'll go ahead and get it on her calendar right now or i you know setting next perfect she We you you're because I see you as a type B at in your personality But then you are so a type A i am your so in your logistics. Yeah.
Speaker: And actually it's quite difficult because. you would think Justin is a type A. Right? needs all the data. We've covered this. Right. However, No. No.
Speaker: Here's a wing it. Kind of guy. Wait, what? Yes. i'm shocked by now what i have learned it's like when we travel okay i have google maps for so many places when you travel together is also where you really see oh What people are. Yeah.
Speaker: Ask us how we know. Yeah. We've maybe been on a girl's trip together for our 40th birthday. We did. And poor Katie. endured my type A. Oh, personality well, you're sweet to say that because I was going to say poor Emily. I think tapped her foot.
Speaker: More than, you know. We don't have to have an agenda, but we do need to go. what We can't waste daylight. Exactly. um But. What's... what i think What I think I can say for both of us, though, is we're not...
Speaker: mean natured people. We're petty and we have thoughts. Yeah. But like we're not mean natured people. And so it's not like she was sitting there tapping her foot like. like or at least im correct me if I'm wrong, but... Yeah, I know. See, that's what I mean. No, literally, that's actually what I was about to say. It's her tapping her foot going, um, Katie.
Speaker: I'm gonna need you to. Put your jacket on a little faster. i' a note So it's not like it was inside. like festering into some sort of meanness. It was just like.
Speaker: You're annoying me. And I'm gonna tell you about it. And it was fascinating for me to learn how you travel. It was also fascinating for me to learn how Emily shops. Yeah.
Speaker: So, well, and do you remember the trend? It was maybe last year or two years ago on TikTok that we listen and we don't judge. Yes. I just know. I do but I also love you.
Speaker: Like I judge you, but i'm I do love you and I want to help you. Agreed. assuming you wanted the help. same I will still give you help. Yeah. I'm listen, that's the other thing and in my, book I'm like. You want to help me? Okay.
Speaker: Sign me up. Yeah, like. I'm... i'm I'm definitely not one that's turning down help. Ever. So yes, I will say i am I am learning that I am a type A. Okay. Justin is very much a type B. He is a O.
Speaker: Um, He's more of an Anthony Bourdain. Traveler. Okay? I... have learned to become an Anthony Bourdain, but... Maybe I'm Anthony Bourdain production crew.
Speaker: Because like I have done the research of like, hey. they're like you want to have the best Gelato. in Italy. Here's 17 places that claim they're the best. Here's the flavors you should get.
Speaker: And I put them on a map. so And then if we find ourselves. Find your whimsy within that. yes yes oh you want like we were when we went to dublin over the summer The kids were whining and starving.
Speaker: okay And we can't do fish and chips every single meal. for kids you can but they do start to push back starts to feel a little repetitive and so because of my handy dandy google map Peace.
Speaker: I said, hey, you got two options. We can walk 10 minutes this way or 10 minutes this way, but I can get you great pizza. It was the best pizza. Really? Spicy? as I'll get out in Dublin. In Dublin. Love this. I think it was Bambino.
Speaker: Might have been the name. Okay. Line out the door. wrapped around. It was incredible. Grace just running down your arms. is amazing. grease running down your arms Yummy.
Speaker: It was. Now I want pizza. I know. um
Speaker: I just listened to Amy Poehler's. I love Amy Poehler's podcast. It's one of the podcasts I do like to keep up with. She had Rosie O'Donnell on the other day. who who what i'm hearing is Re -famous. is the word. She just um hosted Jimmy Kimmel the other day. and and um reference to the kush balls remember when she had the show which she and she would do the cush balls. Yes. I. I...
Speaker: Definitely remember her getting cancelled. at some point i remember her being canceled but i can't remember why she i i think it was because she spoke out about her political beliefs oh Which is odd because... Like, Hollywood is... notoriously left, but I guess she just really pushed it.
Speaker: I guess. i guess Well anyways, my point in bringing this up. is um At that time i that she was canceled, I was very like. born and raised red conservative.
Speaker: And I have since. To be fair, I'm getting more and more liberal by the day. Yeah, like by the day. Um. But... She was, so I'm listening to this podcast and I'm dying laughing.
Speaker: Like, oh my God, I forgot how funny she was. So so funny. Well she moved to Ireland. Yes she did. So she was talking about Ireland. And I was like, And Emily just got back from Ireland.
Speaker: And I'm like, I need to go to Ireland. I'm ready whenever you are. Okay. Okay. Listen. um There's this cooking school that I really want to go to, that is that I've wanted to go to. for years before ballerina farm said it I have bought the cookbook. Okay. I've owned it.
Speaker: own the the apron on the whole thing okay and when i have my say it again say what's well you would probably pronounce it or think it would be but pronounced ballymaloe um at ballymaloo Ballymaloo. And it's out in Cork. uh encountered work and that's where i'm gonna go when i have my mental breakdown finally oh I can't wait. I'll go with you. and um i Because you know what you need when you have a mental breakdown?
Speaker: A bestie. You're super type B bestie. mm -hmm Who's just like, oh my God. I know. feel your And I'll make you bread and butter and cheese because you learn how to make like all of those things. Let's do it.
Speaker: I'm going to need you to put that mental breakdown on your calendar. I'm trying. Their classes are full right now. Okay. So as soon as you can get in. Yeah. Mental breakdown it is. There you go. um Oh, so coming back around to this. So Julia, she she'll be one of our guest co -hosts. when emily's gone or i am gone and julia is my manager at the boutique and she is Quite possibly. She can make me laugh.
Speaker: Like, she's a hysterical she's hysterical. But she does not find joy in the podcast the way I do. Yet. yet. yeah And I think it's because yeah i think it's cause she's young.
Speaker: And so. um I'll tell you she's really relieved. that you were actually yes yes because she if she was like if katie asks me to do this one more time I might quit.
Speaker: she She won't quit. She she won't quit. um She and I work too well together. for her to quit. Yes. So, okay. All right, Emily, how did we... first officially meet.
Speaker: You know I think it was actually Amy that introduced us. Probably. um When you used to have Vintage Hope over on Main Street. The second. Yep. The second iteration of this company that has been to now is going to be celebrating 10 years. um And you were in that cute little house. So cute. And. um Amy?
Speaker: ah Took me down there okay oh you need to meet these two cute little boutique owners okay went down there At the time, I had a business business partner. yeah And. um I'm going to text Julia real quick. to bring the bottle over Oh, perfect. Because that was that had less than I thought. Perfect. Okay. um And...
Speaker: We met and clicked. and loved the vibe of the shop. All of that. You and I clicked really well. We. Uh, from the beginning, which is which is why.
Speaker: It is so interesting to me that you're type A. Because... There is this. Granger. about your personality. That. Do not laugh. No, it's just, yes. I mean, my dad's side of the family calls me princess. So it just, it's fitting. See?
Speaker: I knew what I was, I knew what I was. I knew what I was clocking. And so it has it has been extremely fun for me to to watch. and get to know you more to see this type A.
Speaker: grandeur But I think part of it is. Enneagram seven. Okay. I am not good at this Enneagram situation, oh but I would love.
Speaker: to be good at it because I'm fascinated by it. Oh, talk I will ask Deidre. She has these fabulous bingo cards. Oh, what you are. Okay. And cause that's my other issue is I take the test and I'm like, it's different every time. No, there's a bingo card. Total blackout on the Enneagram seven. Oh, we're going to need to do a whole episode about this. And Enneagram 7, basically, I am a fear of missing out. i And when times get tough. guess what? I'm onto a new hobby or a new location or whatever else. Like I am.
Speaker: See ya out of here. So I have this. Constant party vibe. going interesting yes so we have that but then i have my undiagnosed adhd sure um In my coping mechanism. is over planning and over preparing.
Speaker: Oh, okay. So what would be your wing? Like a one? On the Enneagram? Uh -huh. Yeah. You know, or, or it's like, if you are, I think it's an eight, like an unhealthy when they say, what are you? Oh, because I've heard that if you have a hard time figuring out your Enneagram. I think it's where I go when I'm unhealthy, which are the planners. Oh, that's the planner. I thought that was a one. Okay. No, ones are.
Speaker: they um They are the rule followers. Everything is black and white. Okay. And I'm probably reading this as a seven and the ones out there are like, no. that's not what a one is but as for me i but my dad was a type eight And they are the the way Deidre describes it.
Speaker: is um down here we've had a lot of floods have a lot of hurricanes yeah yeah yeah okay and how many times do you watch the news and all of a sudden these people come in to like high flood evacuation area here come a couple of bubba's on an airboat coming in they're saving everybody right yeah yeah They're saving everybody.
Speaker: But what you don't see. is what that airboat is running over like we jump into action and we will do whatever it is to. jump in and do the right thing. Okay. Kind of bulldoggy about it. Okay. Okay. Okay. And we just jump in not realizing we've stepped on somebody's toes. Okay.
Speaker: Um. interest I get in trouble a lot. I speak for my children. I'm working on it. But if somebody asks Soph like, oh, what are you into? And I'm like, and this is what she does. Yes, yes. And they're like, I was asking. Sophie Stiles, plug coming coming in a minute. You know, and I speak for my children because it's this constant thing, right?
Speaker: um I did think I was a three for a minute and threes are like star performer. Bye. The way I understand it to be. is we like the limelight. and the spotlight.
Speaker: and we want to make sure that everybody recognizes us for that. And I don't really need. to be recognized yeah i don't think i'm that i i wouldn't see you as some you definitely have a performer vibe.
Speaker: and that send sends me over to seven that that yes i can see that I can see that. I genuinely don't know what I am. And then And it, okay. Who is the one, which or which number is it that like. has to... Like.
Speaker: Their core fear is security or something like that. Hmm. Because I did hear this recently that if you. Maybe a six. Maybe a six. That does sound familiar. Sixes are like my nervous folks. They are always the, but what if something bad happens? Okay. I think.
Speaker: And Deidre's gonna be like, that's not what I said at all. but I kind of love this. that We're going to say all the things we're going to say. And then Deidre's going to come in and do an episode with us. And she's going to correct you.
Speaker: Yeah. love that but the sixes are like but what if something bad happens i think i think this is really interesting so Pre... Like. I do kind of my life does kind of go in pre -hospital, post -hospital. Sure. Okay. So like that was my semicolon moment, if you will.
Speaker: Um. because pre -2019 I'd had all three kids um, Life is very hard. All of that stuff. Like I had a.
Speaker: i Had 2019 the twins would have been six Michael would have been seven. going on eight. And then, and so 2019 is when I was hospitalized with suicidal ideation with a plan. And then after that, I got into therapy because I was like, what the hell do I have to do to never return to this place? I'm doing it.
Speaker: and because I am kind of a bulldog in that regard of like like so far so much to the so that When I saw my psychiatrist yesterday for my med check. who I adore. I love this man.
Speaker: and not in an unhealthy way, in a very appropriate way. and um I told him I was doing EMDR and I was telling him some of the things we're working on, which I'm i'm sure I'll share about.
Speaker: when the time comes. um And he said, Katie. I know you. after being your psychiatrist now for five years. let me go get the door Do you mind doing that really quick? Champagne delivery. Champagne delivery from the wonderful one and only Julia.
Speaker: Thank you. Love that. See, she knows what's important. She knows what's important is what I'm going to say about Julia. um Actually, I could say a million things about Julia. And we've just walked through kind of a really tough season.
Speaker: Like. not a seat we took We walked through a tough week together, and she just continued to show me how much I adore her. Okay. so I told my psychiatrist I'm doing EMDR and that we're working on some intense things, specifically anger.
Speaker: Apparently I've repressed anger for, I'm going to say 10, 15, 18, 19, maybe 20 years. Okay. so he was like Katie I've been your psychiatrist now since 2021 so that's five years And he was like, Katie.
Speaker: if there's anything i know about you is that you're gonna wanna Go as Hard and fast as you can wait for it. Wait for it Woo! oh did it Love it. She did it even without her champagne sword, guys.
Speaker: I love that gift. it's I'm not gonna lie. i'm I'm very proud of that gift. For my 40th, Katie bought me a champagne sword. And it sits on my mantle. And Justin said, is this where it's going to live? And I said, yes. Of course it is. Because every day I need to be reminded. Bit.
Speaker: Life is... worth celebrating. And you know what? We should have champagne. That might need to be our logo. There you go. We have thoughts. And then it's a champagne sword. Just a sword. Like.
Speaker: Yes, we're petty, but what this actually means is celebration. that's right That's kind of fun. sure see how this is just taking shape as we go it's so good um we don't need a plan we don't need a plan we do have one in front of us and we are making our way through it Slowly. Slowly. Slowly, but surely. But listen, ah listen we're we're doing great. Okay, so my my psychiatrist was like, Katie, do not blow through this. You have to go slow.
Speaker: Like this is some intense stuff. But I was like, but I want to get to the other side. He's like, I know you do. But you got to go slow. Cause this could really, I think you might be in like seven, eight territory with me. See, I think. I... I think, what but when I take these tests, I'm not kidding you. I get a different number every time.
Speaker: And I'm like, we're going to get Bingo cards. Okay. I cannot wait for this. Because when I hear people talk about the Enneagram, I'm like, oh my God, tell me more. Yeah. And then once you know the numbers and once you know people who are those numbers, you're like. Oh, makes sense. I know how to work with this person. I know how to relate to this person. So good. Right.
Speaker: Oh so cool! Okay. So. We met. many a years ago. twenty Probably 2018. eight.
Speaker: Well, when did you? Go on that first Paris trip. That was in 2019. That was in October of 19. Okay. i Open the guild in 18. Okay. The floods happened in 17. uh -huh harvey happened in 17 yeah 17, eight, so.
Speaker: Around 2018, 17, 18. It's got to be when we met. Yeah. 10 years ago. Oh my God. Almost. Yeah. Okay. so We had the boutique over there.
Speaker: And Emily came. She was going on her first trip to Paris. and Second. Second. Sorry. No, it's okay. But it was just me and a girlfriend going. Okay. And we styled you for that. Yes.
Speaker: And I said, hey, would you? Yeah. and It was so fun. And I feel like that was the beginning of our like actual friendship relationship, yeah you know?
Speaker: And then just throughout the years. you know, just fun things, all the things I attended. I loved dinners at the guild. Those were so great. Oh, I loved Dinners at the Guild.
Speaker: They were so great. I brought multiple friends. Small plug for Chef Zettelmeyer. Go for it. Chris now has... Eastwood Station in Edo, Houston. Shut up. So that opened a month ago. Oh, okay. So very new. Yeah. Okay. Yes. It took a long time to get it open because as everybody knows, construction always takes longer than you think it will.
Speaker: um So much longer. They did their soft. like they're friends and family it was when we were in ireland okay so it's been a month Maybe. Yeah, Emily went on a fantastic trip. They have a family that they love to travel with.
Speaker: And they did a fantastic trip to Ireland. It was so fun watching it. I love it. And that's where this pizza came from. I do love it. and um It's with. Deidre. Yeah. Oh, Deidre. Yeah. Oh, that we were just talking about the Enneagram. And her family. um And. ah And I think he knows this. One of my favorite pastimes on all of our family trips.
Speaker: which we have now taken. It's like three or four. Six. Oh! Six trips. I think I counted up. this Ireland was six every summer. How fun. I know. To find a family that you can be friends with like that. That's special. And we all know that my favorite pastime is giving Casey a really hard time. Which is Deidre's husband, Casey. Who, coincidentally, is also the bassist in our band.
Speaker: That's right people. i have left this part out so far i add this another one of those things i try to quit and i can't nope nope no one's letting her no one's letting her um so uh dad bod yeah Emily is the lead singer.
Speaker: Right? I'm one of the lead singers. But yes. Justin, her husband, plays guitar. Lead guitar. um Tell us all about it. Smitty is on. um Acoustic. He's on mandolin. He's on harmonica.
Speaker: And he is our other lead singer. Okay. Casey is our bassist. And um usually we can get him to sing two songs. Oh, really? Really? Because we bully him.
Speaker: okay okay listen um and then we have mike messina on drums okay um if you ever get pulled over. You can tell him. I was going to say, I think he's a cop. He is. He's ah with the Fort Bend County Sheriff's Office. I don't think he actually.
Speaker: I don't think he pulls people over. though Yeah. Isn't that like a beginning stage of being a comp? is pulling the people over. I don't know. i wish I'll ask them. I don't. We have rehearsals tomorrow. i'll ask them well oh my god when is your next gig
Speaker: people love richmond listen up uh we are being courted for a date in october and november and we're trying to make it work with everybody's schedules right now so You know what I kind of want to do?
Speaker: the Okay. Firm one, I would say, is The Christmas Walk. Every year we perform. in front of Mercy Goods. the Community Christmas Walk. Love them. That's our firm date. One might be an incredibly public.
Speaker: venue. One is a private venue. oh or October, November. Okay, gotcha. But we're just done. Because yeah, December's very public. Yeah, December is very public. So our town Richmond. is one of the seven.
Speaker: hallmark towns is that right did i say that right Well, I don't know how many numbers there are, but we were listed. as um in southern livings oh or maybe we were listed as number seven Could have been.
Speaker: Seven on the list of homework towns or there are seven towns and we're one of them. Are but are you talking about for the Christmas deal? No, just Hallmark Towns by Southern Living. Oh, I don't know what number we are. I'm sure somebody has told me. I definitely then maybe got that wrong.
Speaker: But. For Christmas, we were listed in Southern Living. for our Christmas weird festivities. Definitely a Stars Hollow. yeah We definitely give Stars Hollow vibes around here. yeah We've got quirkiness with characters, complete with characters, complete with pettiness, complete with.
Speaker: Um. small town bureaucracy small town bureaucracy like old meets new etc etc We've got the super historic Texan. um background.
Speaker: Well, and for those of you that might be new to Texas. Yeah. We are. where the old 300 or 300 families that came through. Okay. And settled. And it settled they settled in Richmond. Yes, Mirabelle Lamar's.
Speaker: um Homestead is right over. I do love that you know this. um jane long's boarding house right here literally right here off of morton uh carrie nation let's see the foster um Jess Stewart, who is involved in.
Speaker: Everything. Literally everything. sure So what is going on with the YMCA? They got a big event at the end of September. Okay. We are rocking and rolling. They've got the architecture firm. I think they are displaying the actual.
Speaker: Because is it it's the Stewart family YMCA or is it Jess Stewart YMCA? No, no no y i'm c no, no, no, no. Jess Stewart works for the YMCA. It's T .W. a Davis. Oh my word. I can't believe I messed that up. But.
Speaker: just as basically the face of it. right okay okay so like he and also a very historic family yes and he is a descendant of the fosters. Okay. So Foster High School.
Speaker: et cetera And he is still, he just received. The 200 year. land grant award. So his family is still on the original land grant that they received.
Speaker: From. I can't remember if it was Stephen F. Austin or... or his dad. This is so but they are still ranching that same property. And they they won that award. that um the governor like has a huge ball and they get you get the 100 year the 150 and the 200 and that's really cool so and this also goes back to like politically when Because there was like so many things about you that I was like, oh, well, she's clearly going to be a Republican. just like I am.
Speaker: and then you weren't and it was like wait a minute here is someone who I'm watching over the years. Live out her values. And also be kind of.
Speaker: Like. the antithesis of everything that I was always. Made to believe and now let me be very clear my mother You know, when you're when you're born and raised in... the Houston, Texas area.
Speaker: And they're just, we are what we are, you know what I mean? In a lot of ways. And I was raised very like evangelical Christian, even though I grew up in as in an Episcopal church. Um, But there was still gosh 90s Christianity was a mess for women I feel like. like a mess.
Speaker: Okay, good. Then you dodge that bullet. Yeah. Y 'all came out with some bangers though. Dang. Listen, purity culture. Uh... And by no means am I not saying I'm not like listen like Yeah.
Speaker: I do believe lots of things, but like the way purity culture just shamed girls from a super early age, it was like. wow, no wonder I have issues.
Speaker: um But like. So my mom has also now. become more, she loves to say that she's purple. She's very purple. in her beliefs my mom so like even my mom my siblings we all have really shifted so when I say I was raised this way it's not like I have these like bible beating parents that were like hitting me over the head with with stuff with like indoctrination it was just the nature of where i grew up you know And so my mom has has changed a lot of her worldview. My my siblings definitely have as well.
Speaker: And so it was so so when I say I was. I was raised to believe. democrats liberals left -leaning whatever was one way or another I... I don't necessarily mean my parents were shoving that down my throat. It was just the nature of where I lived.
Speaker: Um. And so. You really did show me like, I was like, wait. Hold on, she's... Left leaning. And also is really...
Speaker: like passionate about. the history of the ranchers you know and in my head i was like that doesn't add up And then I watched you just live it. And I was like, wait, it does add up because it's about a human being. Yes. It's layered.
Speaker: Um, there's history. I mean, so my mom is, those are so important. Vancouver, Washington. Yes. Okay. Raised by huge.
Speaker: democratic family. um And so she. married my dad like washington pacific northwest washington so and there is there is a defining line so the is mountains so if you are from eastern washington statistically speaking it's pretty red Okay.
Speaker: If you were from the Western side, so Seattle, Vancouver, anything along the coastline, basically, statistically speaking. More liberal. More liberal. Okay. Now.
Speaker: Broad brush, right? Sure. like As with everything, right? Yes. So she grew up there. She marries my dad who is from Yoakum, Texas. um How did they meet? They met in a bar. Wanna say in Montana?
Speaker: I i um love that. I know I should know where. And what really sealed the deal for my mom was my dad could draw a perfect United States on a cocktail napkin That might be one of the most most precious things I've ever heard. I know. He was a wonderful artist, my dad. Yeah. Yeah. So, but my dad was Catholic. Okay. and um What I know to be true about the Catholic Church is they do.
Speaker: really champion social needs. That's amazing. so Between my mother's... um beliefs and upbringing, my Catholic faith.
Speaker: um And just being raised to be a strong Texas woman, um to be kind, to be fair. My dad's favorite punishment for us, I'm one of four.
Speaker: children okay um But the three oldest, we were all where it ran together. And as siblings. are uh apt to do we bickered and fought and uh you know If Tyler wouldn't let me play with the pretty G .I. Joe, I would go to tears. Okay, sure. I always got the one with the long neck that was weird.
Speaker: Like I got the weird G .I. Joe. The weird G .I. Joe. Yeah. And that was if Tyler deigned to play with Amy and I. So I didn't have younger. I had a younger brother. Tyler was the oldest. okay so i didn so But if we bicker, if we had any issue. My point is you're going to have to educate me on the GI. Oh, it was it was the angling one.
Speaker: Mmm. Um... But... If it got to where we would be fussing at each other so loud that either my mom, I'm sure, would give my dad a look. or my dad could hear us okay from whatever every yard work he was doing on a saturday We were all brought in and we had to hold hands. I'm sorry. the table.
Speaker: or on the sofa. Y 'all were the original get along shirt. We were. And and here, okay, she's going to, my sister's going to kill me. But my sister has. clammy hands.
Speaker: oh no and so he always put her in the middle and you couldn't you couldn't let go and and everything until you were ready to apologize and be sweet oh Oh, let me tell you what, my three teenagers now.
Speaker: We're going to be doing this. It is the number one piece of advice I can give. parents of siblings yeah i've used on my children okay when we evacuated for harvey eventually okay um and made it up to my sisters amy and i were she's in dallas or austin austin okay okay and so we're like running all over town assembling muck kits.
Speaker: And every time we come home, the kids are squabbling on everything else. No, the kids were hard time. Three and five? Yeah, they were young. So we had two three -year -olds, two five -year -olds. Between the two of you. Yeah.
Speaker: Those kids are exactly the same age. Yeah. Owen and Eleanor are seven months apart. Oh. And then... um ah Sophie and Cormac are two weeks apart. Oh what?
Speaker: Fabulous news, all four. I know. they really are yeah um so I had to call them down to hold hands. All four? All four. I'm obsessed. Because they were, you know, I'm sure fighting over Legos or blocks or something. Something.
Speaker: and what I will i will never forget. Because remember, we have a... We have three -year -olds in the mix. Okay. Potty training three -year -olds. Listen. And one of the children.
Speaker: Just nude. from the waist down definitely And they're all four just sitting in a line holding hands and you can't let go. until you're ready to be sweet. i love And it always works. I don't know why it works. I'm sure there's some sort.
Speaker: Of psychological or hormonal reason. I did a form of this for a time. where I would make the kids. I did a thing where I would make them go at our old house. We had a pool that was easy for them to kind of run around. It was like a good it was a good lap.
Speaker: You know, that wasn't like. It wasn't like they were running an entire football field, but it was like i and it was easy to count. How many laps did you run? Sometimes when they were being crazy, I'd be like, you need to go run laps around the pool. Okay, your attitude too much.
Speaker: So. Go give me five laps around the pool. Well, then I would do this thing where they had to hold hands and walk around. I don't know what I was doing, making them walk around the pool and run around the pool, but that was just the first thing that came to my mind. Yeah. So I'd make them hold hands and walk around the pool. It works. And it did it really did. um Stop a lot of things.
Speaker: But I'm telling you as teenagers now, and what's so crazy is like. I actually am like enjoying this part of parenting. More. then i have a lot of phases like there's i will babies oh my god give me all the babies the little squishy babies But...
Speaker: um and I'm gonna say that I was not so good when they um started moving about. and demanding. Things of me.
Speaker: When they were still so much a toddler. I wasn't good at toddler stage. I was not a good toddler mom. I was not, I was a good baby mom. And I think a pretty decent.
Speaker: Like kid mom? Yeah. I also decided to open a business when my kids were toddlers. So see, I did the same. I was a great baby mom. Terrible toddler mom. Terrible kid mom. And I think I'm at, but but I think I'm nailing the teenager mom. I'm loving them morphing into young adults. Isn't it? wild and an incredible it cracks me up owen is very much turning into my dad. Oh, favorite. pastime i love this is give it getting a rise out of sophie
Speaker: Mmm. And he knows exactly, like I, he has the same look in his eye that my dad would get of like. You know what? This dinner's getting a little boring. I'm gonna. Let's add some spice. Let's rile this thing up a little bit. And I have to decide as a parent.
Speaker: which this is the hard part. Okay. Do I join in the fun? Ooh, tough one. Or do I... police it. i But I think it's good for her to learn how to manage all of that. It's a gray area for sure. Steven, my husband, is a staunch believer.
Speaker: in I think I've said that word twice. I don't know. Look at that. He is a big believer in like. I need to kind of. like Rag on my kids Yeah. So that they. are not Delicate. delicate And.
Speaker: Half the time. I. agree with it and I join in and it's kind of funny. The champagne, I'm like, I'm like. burke being here. So I'm trying to like move the mic away from when I do that. That's okay.
Speaker: so half the time I join in the other half I'm like wait are we bordering on mean because I am i'll I'll admit it. i'm a I'm a tad bit of a snowflake. as that term is used. Like I'm a tad bit of a snowflake.
Speaker: Emily's not. I grew up being teased. Like, I mean, like that was, my dad was Steven, right? like Yes. Yes. That's just the thing. And you learn how to roll with it. What's interesting is I wouldn't say that I'm a snowflake about me.
Speaker: I'm a snowflake about. And I'm using snowflake in a negative term right now. Right. Um, I'm a snowflake about. My. Kids, if it goes too far.
Speaker: And I'm a snowflake about other people if I feel like it goes too far. Well, you're tenderhearted. Okay. Oh, maybe that's what I should. Okay. I'm tenderhearted. You're tenderhearted. I'm tenderhearted. And you are your children's biggest advocate. I am. And you are. Not that my husband is not. No. There for them, but I am there.
Speaker: But i in Stephen's defense, I think there is. um it's It's like a... therapy exercise on this right yes because I do not want my children to go out and be so fragile they get knocked over the first time they're in a college class and they come crying to me no right go get your butt back in that class right So.
Speaker: I do agree with you very much there. It's therapy. Okay. All right. You know what? for it Okay, you know what I needed to hear that I do did need to hear but sometimes it is hard when we all gang up on Sophie Oh. Bye. She just gives a really great reaction.
Speaker: Their reactions are good. you know And I do live for that tiny little smirk that Owen will give me. Oh. Cause he's pretty, you know do he's like, he's a very, um,
Speaker: ah Well... he He is able to present himself really well. Both of your kids can. Yes. um I think I have gotten more of a glimpse into who Sophie is. Right. Because of the store, because of, you know, just... yeah as a girl like You learn so much about people. about other women with how they show up. Right.
Speaker: And so like Sophie, I feel like I just know a little better. But. Owen always presents himself well. He knows what is expected of him in public. He is a huge introvert.
Speaker: but that's not to say He is shy. He is just. um He's selective on who gets To be in his circle. Okay, I love... I like that word better. I was about to say reserved. to No, but it'ss he's... Super selective. It's selective is the act is the correct term. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker: when he was a little see again i need my vocab of the day There you go. there you Look at all these words. Look at so many words today, guys. To recap, we have selective, kismet, serendipitous.
Speaker: And I'm sure there were other ones. but what a Staunch believer. Staunch. Listen. My word last week was abysmal. um oh oh a Good one. Yeah. Yeah. okay but owen so i'm very selective he is he is selective on who gets a piece of him and he like he did not learn boundaries from me Ever. Like that. is I was going to say.
Speaker: ah How the heck is he? already living out what i've learned and what i'm learning i know it did In my late 30s, early 40s. In no way. As a matter of fact, Sophie, she is better at boundaries than I am. And she has offered to be my personal secretary and say no to people for me.
Speaker: hell yeah so emily and i if you can't tell we don't boundaries don't come naturally to us. We work really hard on it. we So that's, but also. Oh, my God. Do you know what this podcast could also be? hu our reason to say no. Oh my God, no.
Speaker: I have to film a podcast. Next. For we have thought. Peace. Oh my God, I'm so booked that day. I'm recording a podcast. I'm recording a podcast and then I'm going to have to edit.
Speaker: For like a lot of days. Oh, see That is the one thing I will miss is my production team. i mean not I mean, I love Ray and Sarah, but... they're super pricey. Oh, speaker box media. A hundred percent. Amazing.
Speaker: I will sing their, they. While I have never used them personally. I've witnessed their work. i've I know, I know Sarah. I at least enough by no means do I like know her as like a close personal friend, but like.
Speaker: Extremely incredible people. yeah Very, very talented. Major plug for Speakerbox Media. But no, this editing is going to be done by AI. Perfect. Is what I'm going to tell you. Perfect. Don't tell me. But that's okay. No, I won't. I won't.
Speaker: nance is nancy who's her mom And I won't, I won't. I won't share how much AI I use. So there we go um Okay. So we're about at an hour mark. I know. So we're going to kind of wrap this up.
Speaker: What do you want to leave folks with? Okay, well, here's here's what I want to, I do want to make sure we get this into this episode. The Guild. Okay? you owned the guild.
Speaker: In my eyes, you still own the guild. Because in a lot of ways, the Guild is Emily, the Emily is Guild. Or the, wait. Yes, I came out a little wrong. So to me, there is still guild magic also because some of the guild magic is in my master bedroom.
Speaker: Whoa! whoa I'm going to explain that. In just a second. I'm everywhere, guys. She is. She is. Amen. Okay.
Speaker: So the guild... is where the boutique now is. And that is definitely. Like. walking through a lot of grief like that was a tough time and i'm not going into that right now um But just like.
Speaker: When Harvey happens, the guild was a boutique event space that truly brought magic. So I'm going to just. slight jump in jump in oh please because when harvey happened the guild did not exist Oh my God, I meant COVID.
Speaker: Yes. So. Harvey was the catalyst. Was it really? It was. So actually where we are sitting right now is the bookend from um Lit. Lit. Yes. um So we are at the end cap.
Speaker: And this is where myself. Amy and Zach of Mercy Goods met. As an almost triage emergency distribution point. I did not know this. This is amazing. Yes. So. We had, it was just a shell of a building. Okay. We ran. a power cord um
Speaker: Kombucha. Okay. From Trenton's Place all the way through. Real quick. back window amy and her husband cody own blockhouse coffee and kitchen and then they also own the building jackson seven so like they're my Cody is my landlord for the boutique.
Speaker: And then Zach, we have mentioned him. A few times he owns Mercy Goods. um And then at the time Kombucha was where Lit Book Bar is now.
Speaker: and they were incredible the kombucha company and they're growing so they've moved into it they bought a building and moved in there and that's where lit is yes so where ek is now where the book end is now was just concrete okay and insulation and a roof like there was nothing there was no electrical no nothing okay and we ran a power cord through the window to operate a fan and a crock pot Okay. And every day I would load the crock pot and bring it up and we would have tacos. Shut!
Speaker: Up! and a cooler of waters and cokes and we would um primarily for north richmond sure um although like we would have we would be a donation point so people would donate um for example diapers so we got in touch with um
Speaker: shireen from abigail's place at the time children's clothes were delivered so you know hey You have this. um Senior Meals on Wheels, there were certain deliveries where we knew they would take those. and so our um my Uh...
Speaker: connections. that I had at the time from being involved in the community. was put me in a position to where I could find nonprofits. Easily make all the connections, like easily make like the points, like.
Speaker: From here to here. Hey, we've got a lot of school supplies. We need to get it over to Pink Elementary. So Zach. you know new people that were teaching at the time He later became a school board trustee for Lamar. And I think it's totally okay to say North Richmond is an area of our town, our city, that needs more help.
Speaker: than another Yes, it is. a I want to say that kindly. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. um historically Um, A lower socioeconomic. Yes. area.
Speaker: Thank you. um so Not me pulling out a word like socioeconomic. i'm gonna ask Cheers to that. That's terrible. I shouldn't have said that. So over tacos one day. we're talking And I'm telling Amy and Zach about this dream that I have.
Speaker: of having a workshop space to teach people anything from fiber arts to cooking and canning and all of that and celebrating and maybe even having a little like wedding venue and a few and Indian runner ducks out there and have a grand old time. I'm literally getting a little like my eyes are stinging with tears because I had such. good memories. Bye.
Speaker: And Zach shares how he wants to teach kids. um Woodworking. okay kind of through um the support system of Um... a church as well.
Speaker: Okay. So at the end of Harvey wants. you know United Way came in. all hands came in and we were relieved of our duties we weren't needed because these larger non -profits came in Knew how to run these facilities sure Um. Amy said. Can I buy you a cup of coffee?
Speaker: I said, sure. Heck yeah! Always. Yeah. um And she goes, tell me about this idea. And so I tell her and she goes, could you do it in a smaller space? At the time, I wanted 80 acres. Well, of course. I'd already picked out the 80 acres. Did I not say grandeur or did I not say grandeur? And Justin said, what are you going to do with 80 acres? You got to learn how to drive a tractor. I can do it.
Speaker: Sure. And he goes, there's roaches and snakes. I said, I'm out. um So Amy said, can you do it ah in less than 80 acres? I said, sure, no problem. how How many, how many?
Speaker: And she goes, 1 ,000 square feet. I said, sure. Can I have alpacas? No. Okay. i give me that Give me a week. I think I can figure this out. So I signed the lease.
Speaker: And then meanwhile, Zach and I had tacos or coffee or something. And he goes, I really want to do this. I need a building. And I knew somebody that knew somebody. And so he was able to get the building that he is in now now on Morton street. Okay.
Speaker: So we both built these dreams over crockpot tacos. Um, and not going to like, uh, taco sounds real good right now. Now that you keep saying it. I know. i It's... it's I've been thinking about these tacos actually all week.
Speaker: I think it's going to have to go in rotation for the dinners and now that school has started. Yeah. Um. So. i opened the guild okay we were a beautiful kind of white box event center yeah We could do ah seated dinners for 25. We would do private events for 50. But we would also do art workshops. We had an artist in residence, Phaedra Taylor, who is an amazing artist. Yes, yes, yes, yes.
Speaker: we had We had a theologian in residence. um ah During the day, David Taylor wrote, I think, two books. Shut ah up. waltzed sitting.
Speaker: And napping on the Guild couch. Oh, are we are we getting Shakespeare? uh oh my god i just lost the name I don't know. The bookstore in Paris. What's it called?
Speaker: Shakespeare and Company. Are we getting Shakespeare and Company vibes? I think we are. I think we are. What was that book that I gave you and we read? Oh my God. Girl in Paris? It's called The Paris Novel. The Paris Novel. Okay, also listen. Okay, so.
Speaker: Emily gave me this book. Because she was like, this is such a good book. I know. mean My mom's best friend gave it to her and then she gave it to me. And I gave it to you. And y 'all. Okay. This over the summer, I read the Paris novel.
Speaker: Then I read Mad Mabel and then I read the Calamity Club. And when I tell you. I have been so bored of entertainment. since those three books. because Every book I try to read is does not compare to those two not scratching that itch It's not.
Speaker: And everything I watch is not, not scratching that issue either. Those three books, which are. All very different. Yet. Similar. They all made me laugh.
Speaker: They all hit true. Heart points. Yes. They were all about a central. Female character. Uh. I'm telling you, those three books, I literally, I'm like, I turned something on right now and I'm like.
Speaker: Or I turn on it. I'll either like. Start reading on my Kindle. I'll start listening on audible. I'll try to watch a TV show. Nothing. I don't know. I think those three books and it started with the Paris novel. Those three books just met me at a point in my life this summer that I needed to so badly that like, I'm like.
Speaker: What is going to shake me? Like. Yeah. It's like so dope. Paris novel. Highly recommend. And they reference this whole. The Shakespeare and Company. Yes. Where many writers would spend. The tumbleweeds. The tumbleweeds. Okay. ah So. So yes. He was.
Speaker: your tumbleweed my tumbleweed we had a theologian in residence listen um Wrote two books there. Um... And it was wonderful. And then COVID happened. COVID.
Speaker: Where I earlier said Harvey, I meant COVID. COVID happened. which um you I felt. personally. what What do they call it um when everything shut down? It was unless it was like absolutely necessary. What do they call that? Essential businesses. Right? I felt the guild was a very essential. Heck yes, because we needed celebration. We needed that. And then the reality was no.
Speaker: um The other underlying issue was my dad's cancer had come back. And so we had to make the hard decision. of
Speaker: I don't know if I can operate the guild. and have people coming in because that was when we had pods remember you had your little social oh sure it was like uh yeah you so you couldn't write Because we live so close to my parents, I didn't want that exposure. Oh, definitely. No, that's too important. one thing opened up in Texas again.
Speaker: I started doing a few things here and there. And. You came to me. You guys were selling. Yes, my mom owned the building we were in, and she was ready to move on. And you came to me. We were at the Guild, and you said, hey, you know everything that's happening in Richmond. Yes, she does. ah Do you know of any properties that are going to be available soon? Oh, my God. I remember this now that you're saying it. And I said, I think I do.
Speaker: i had and Unbeknownst to me. Unbeknownst to me. I just started. saying it. I had not talked to Justin about this at all. right Um,
Speaker: The writing was kind of on the wall for my dad at the time. I think it must have been September. late late September, I think. Well, and We, I said, I think I do. And you said, no, no, think about it. Uh -huh.
Speaker: I think I have a space And we'll figure that out. I don't know what that looks like yet. Sure. By, let's see, by November, my dad had passed. sure And New Year's Eve. is when we signed we signed a sublet sublet Or sub -lease, sub -lease. And...
Speaker: I was subletting. We signed a sub lease. So you brought the boutique in and I did a few pop -ups. Bye. It wasn't the same. No. And we decided ultimately. I am busy grieving.
Speaker: I am busy, which is so reading. a fo Um, Obviously my dad. And supporting my mom through that. And then. um grieving the guilt Closing the business.
Speaker: And it was such a multi -layered thing that I will say up until really this last year, I have still been grieving the guilt and that's been six years. 100%. I'll tell you. with i mean i i mentioned this earlier i was gonna say alluded to but i didn't allude to it i mentioned it i'm I'm in a hard year. I'm in the hardest year I've had in 10 years.
Speaker: And. Even just having to start getting even just starting to have to like wrap my brain around the idea of maybe not.
Speaker: You know doing things the way I've always always done them or kind be you even right there. I'm trying to I'm trying to gloss over it like But as a business owner and well, and what I'm going to say is especially something I've learned. in the last week with being at a conference that with other um boutique owners is like no no you got to have the hard card conversations with yourself yeah you know so having that hard conversation with myself of What? does life look like if I...
Speaker: Do not go forward. has given me a glimpse into that grief. that you went through. yeah And I, I. I. i've always tried to respect that and i hope that i have but i even have even more understanding now And no, when you say like six years and you're grieving still the guild.
Speaker: I... I understand as much as I can understand. right because i won't say i know yet right but That is. hard Yeah. hard and you were grieving your dad at the same time yeah and you have to prioritize which grief right which grief is going to be the top runner now because if i grieve the guild Amidst.
Speaker: the the direct loss of my dad that feels really selfish right well in prop and also I do I did get it, ah at least in those beginning years. You were so close to your - parents and andrew died you're so much your dad from what i understand yeah And so. 100%, I think your dad.
Speaker: was the front runner. Yeah. Of who your grief needed to be. Absolutely. You know? And I mean, I wouldn't have done it any other way. No, you wouldn't have. I don't think that. And did I kick the can on grieving guilt? Sure. Yes. But I think that's valid.
Speaker: But I'm also somebody that keeps myself busy. and You are. And as long as I keep myself busy, I don't have to think about the bad things. Oh, I love that. Me too. Me too. Enneagram 7. Anger the last 10 years. I'm going to say I should. As my as my therapist told me, or my psychiatrist told me, so like and I do, I have a fantastic psychiatrist. I'm very, very lucky because of where I went to treatment for my OCD. I was able to get in with this psychiatrist who is very, very, he's very much a specialist in OCD.
Speaker: And I adore him, adore him. And he was like, yeah, youve so he said, you've been sitting on this anger. For a long time because he knows I'm not the type to like beat it into submission. Yeah. He knows I'm sitting on it all.
Speaker: You know, like sitting on that anger. and um Oh shit, I just lost my train of thought. But now you're dealing with it. Now I'm dealing. Now you're dealing with it. And so that, Oh, keeping ourselves busy. We just keep going, going, going. Yes. Oh, a hundred percent. I will, I will add 12 projects.
Speaker: so Before I deal with my anger. You add a million projects before I have to touch that grief. Not going to do it. Not going to do it. Who wants to be sad? Not me. No, I don't want to be sad. I love being happy. I know. It's a true part of my personality that I want to just be happy. It's not just a fake situation. hey Maybe. We're unicorns, Deidre says.
Speaker: yeah We're rare. Oh I kind of love that! True sevens are rare. Maybe that'll be our logo, a unicorn with We Have Thoughts. There you go. You know, it's the um the ah the the symbol of Scotland.
Speaker: I did not a unicorn? Mhm. I did not know that. the unicorn and then england is the lion and so like in scotland you see a lot of marriages of the symbology of the unicorn and the lion. That's incredible. Okay, keep going.
Speaker: So all all that to say, and what were we saying? We were talking about your grief and how you just kept kept kind of going, going, going. yeah and so But like but dad was the front runner for sure.
Speaker: And then after that. Mourning the guild. Yes. now And then you feel like you. use And you said you said you feel like just now? Just now. Just now? Figuring out. what's next is it another iteration something Ask thing. Okay. Is it come something completely different? okay is it just traveling. like I don't know. And I'm figuring it out.
Speaker: Amidst the throes of a lot of hormones in the house. like Hello, 40s perimenopause. Perimenopause for me. Sophie's 12. Owen's 14. Puberty and perimenopause. Justin is fighting for his life.
Speaker: Okay. Okay, so here's what we're gonna do. We're going to find some sort of. Cabin. Justin and Steven can go to. And then if it was my dream. they'd start some sort of men's retreat For other men to come.
Speaker: But he just goes flying. Steven will never do that. um Yeah. He'll take Stephen up in the airplane Justin will go flying Stephen will go to the woods by himself Does he want to go? Well, they got a little place right down here. in Thompson. Oh, Stephen would probably love that. Does he deer hunt?
Speaker: No. Oh. I think he wants to. Yep. Or he would enjoy it. Anyways. They're not the ones hosting the podcast. Maybe one day we'll have to come up with a lot of activities for Justin. I could come up with a thousand activities for Steven. He doesn't like any of them. Number one on the activity list is to hang.
Speaker: the bracket that my new cordless vacuum It's supposed to go on. That's exciting. That's number one on Justin's list. He doesn't know it. or a fails to remember it i'm not sure which you know both are so i i think So Steven is more type A than I am? Mm -hmm.
Speaker: So Steven has things for me that he's hoping I notice. So we're opposite in that. I would say, do you want to trade husbands? Cause that's weird. That's weird. But here's what I'll do. I'll go flying with Justin. Stephen will come hang all your stuff. Perfect. Love that.
Speaker: love I can hang it if it's if it's just with a nail, but if it requires a drill, I can't do it. It like makes a weird noise and it's stressed out. I love this band because my gallery wall is perfect.
Speaker: But also... It doesn't need that much measuring. Right? Right. Why is the level out? Why is the level out? Just slap that shit up there and then use a command strip to make it even. You want to know where I learned that? One of my favorite podcasts, The Big Boo.
Speaker: oh Well there you go. Like, listen, slap that shit up and then use a command strip. I got tired of waiting for Justin to hang mine. And so if you lift a picture off of any of my walls. There's about seven holes.
Speaker: This is why Emily and I are friends. Because at the end of the day. It's gonna be seven holes for one hole. That sounded weird. it didn't that wouldn't That took a little left turn. That did take a little left turn that it wasn't supposed to take. And it's okay. Okay.
Speaker: So, the guild. And now... I don't know what. I mean, I have a lot of ideas. I was going to say, I have a lot of ideas. All of my ideas require a lot of money.
Speaker: Amen. Great. What a conundrum. There's always buildings I'm looking at. I'm really good at spotting a building and building an entire business plan.
Speaker: in under 24 hours for said building i love this I love none of them are the same. but No, that's your superpower. That's my superpower. It just really needs money. i Listen, I'm here for it. I'm going to keep playing that lotto. Okay, so.
Speaker: um i need to make ah I need to make amends with this master bedroom comment. comment oh yeah okay so inside the inside of the guild so um We had an architecture firm come out and and in a great uh right contractor yeah and um Scott and Chad. So good.
Speaker: And ah while we were building out the guild, I had some visions. and um One of them involved old world antiques. uh in the hill country ish 71 yeah yeah Like, head it into Fredericksburg. Like, LaGrange area? You pass it every time. I pass it every time I head it into Fredericksburg. Oh, it's way before then. Yeah, but like like Stephen and I do love Fredericksburg, so i i pass so but or I pass it every time I'm going to Fredericksburg, but it's very soon. No.
Speaker: No? No. Oh I got it wrong. It's... By LaGrange. Really? Yeah. like in columbus and stuff oh so like i could go there this weekend yeah it's about an hour yeah which required me to learn how to drive a trailer and to learn how to back up a trailer. Okay. you Never learned how to go back up a trailer, by the way. So don't ask me to do it. Nope. Can't do it either. I've tried a few times, failed every time.
Speaker: It was horrible. It was the most humbling experience of my life. Anyways, I picked out this gorgeous set of antique doors, which I believe to be stunning either Moroccan or perhaps Egyptian.
Speaker: But these fabulous doors that are carved and heavy as all get out. I'll tell you, I've said and rock in about 10 times. So we're just going to. Go with Moroccan. Sure. So I pull up with a trailer of all sorts of bits and bobs and these fabulous doors. Stunning. And Chad comes out with Scott.
Speaker: and says what is this and i said oh i want them in the guild and they said where And I said, I don't know, could you just hang him on the wall? Would you want them to function? No, it's okay. More like an art piece. just Like a, like... a like you know.
Speaker: Peace. Can you just do that? Come on, you're an architect. Yeah, just slap that shit up. Come on. Architect it. Yes, architect it. So they put it up. And I can't remember what, we'll we'll say that was a Monday. okay that they They come to me and they say, We have to rebuild the entire wall. before we can hang it because of the structural integrity the weight And all of that. These are some heavy, heavy doors, guys. I said, okay.
Speaker: they are yeah And I said, okay. You're like, just that do it. uh send in the change order i don't care yeah um and so they do that well um i I said, but remember, our soft open is on Thursday.
Speaker: jia yu yao And I said, no, you're going to have to move it. I said, no, I've already sent out the invitations. The soft open is on Thursday. I'm not going to move it. You're gonna do it. Build faster. Hell yes. And so sweet, sweet Chad. They are both wonderful. On a ladder.
Speaker: a couple hours before the soft open with a hair dryer trying to dry paint. Shut up. so Man, I wish I knew you then. So, but they are fabulous doors. Fabulous doors. When we closed the guild and when you officially took over the lease and you weren't just subletting anymore. Yeah. Um, he said, what do you want to do with all this? And I was in the throes of grief with dad. And I said, just box it up. I don't care.
Speaker: Get rid of it. No, is it actually, I'm going to go a little further. You said toss it. Mm. Yeah. So, and, and. Thank God I knew. Oh. Emily and I were close enough friends that I knew.
Speaker: she was going through a lot of stuff because I said, Hey, What do you want me to do with the doors? And she goes, just, just. I guess just awesome. Like, what am I going to do now? Exactly. And I went, oh. No.
Speaker: Well, luckily that exact day, Charlotte, our friend Charlotte was there and Charlotte had had a very large barn at the time that was not being used for much of anything. Now it's a full -blown dance studio for her daughters because they are all elite dancers.
Speaker: But I know, incredible. It just got built out. And so I need to go look at it. Yeah. I need to go see it. But at the time it was just, and and Char said. um, Char and I are good friends. We're all good in neighbors. And she said, just put them in my, put them in my metal building.
Speaker: Because when Emily wants them. We want to make sure we have them for her. So we loaded that shit up. We took it to Char's barn. where it lived for five years.
Speaker: So. i you We both probably forgot about them. I definitely did. I did i did as well. Well, my husband, Steve... He remembered these doors.
Speaker: Because we had gone to we had gone to a fair amount of the dinners. I have messed up my. your my cushion was yeah get that all We had at least went to three or four dinners. And because we didn't discover it right at the beginning, but once we discovered the guilt, we would go to the dinners. We loved them.
Speaker: And so these these doors are at Charlotte's house. And so then Steven and I moved recently. And we had. a situation where Possibly the doors could go.
Speaker: So I text Emily and I said, hey. Those doors that are still at Charlotte's. I want to buy them from you. And... A few conversations go by.
Speaker: and
Speaker: Emily's main love, passion for the Guild. Was that. It was the magic of the guild, which it was true. There was truly a magic about the guild. Like I'd come to these dinners.
Speaker: And. I would suddenly be transported. And it was it was such an experience. and being friends with Emily and I know Emily well enough to know like there's this But like, even when you know the true authentic Emily, there's this grandeur about her. There's this magic about her that is so very special.
Speaker: And... Even when she's at her... You know, maybe lowest you know or whatever There is. There's this grandeur. And I feel like my energy connects with that.
Speaker: as well. I'm good. Oh, looky there. But I do feel like my energy connects with that very much. And... Anyway, so my husband is like, hey.
Speaker: I want to buy these doors from Emily. A handful of conversations go by. all Emily cares about is these, the magic of the guild. So when I said there was the magic of the guild in my master bedroom.
Speaker: It was not a weird thing. It was just that. so now These doors are in my master bedroom. And they are this. Michael's Narnia Doors. It's my son, Michael, who's autistic and almost 15. It's his Narnia Doors.
Speaker: Wait, did you say your one? Michael's... michaels yes yes okay i was like wait hold on she says anything different than what i thought she said but no you said what i thought she said So it's these really incredible Narnia doors.
Speaker: And they're in my bedroom now and in my room, in my house. and just such a cool thing and then i so and then i am now where the guild was And then here we are now.
Speaker: doing a podcast together. We have thoughts. And like, what a cool full circle situation. Serendipitous. So serendipitous. Because my love for the guild is very strong.
Speaker: You know? By no means, like... I would never dismiss the guilt. I'm like, you want to come do the guild again? Amen. Let's do it. I have a building in mind. Okay, okay. But like.
Speaker: What a cool way that this has all come together. it is So. So there you have it. We have. So that's where we're going to. We have thoughts.
Speaker: And that's a bit of our background i'd say it's a good it's a good it's a good uh that's a good background yeah We fleshed it out for everybody. I think so. I think so. Let us know if you have comments, questions or concerns. Yeah.
Speaker: and with We may or may not take them into consideration. Julia will... ah read through them maybe julia will read the comments for us and she'll decide if they're worth our consideration i'm gonna set up a uh an email it's It paused. Oh, there we go.
Speaker: So again we'll figure this out, but we have thoughts. First episode. In the books. Cheers. Cheers. We did it. We did it. And we still have thoughts. We still have so many thoughts. so Join us next week.
Speaker: Because today is Friday. I'm going to say I could probably edit this. We'll have it up by. I'm going to say Monday or Tuesday and then we'll get into into real rhythm. There you go. I'm so here for it. Market calendars. We have thoughts with Emily and Katie.
Speaker: Cocktail ketchup. That's a wrap. Cheers. Okay. Cheers. Bye, guys.
