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00:00:01
Dental Dams, CM Punk and Randy Orton Clones
38 Plays1 year ago
Jimmy Fax is back this week and joins Garrett to chat pro wrestling but somehow end up chatting dental dams, getting hit by cars, spite jobs and other nonsense.
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Transcript
Garrett's Solo Podcast and Jimmy's Return
00:00:34
Speaker
Hey everybody, welcome to another episode of Predetermined, a Pro Wrestling Hangout. Garrett Callender here, and unfortunately I am alone this week. We're gonna Bill Burr this thing. It's gonna be a full hour of just Garrett, no one else, no special guests. Just, you're gonna hear my thoughts and feelings about anything in the world of Pro Wrestling that may have happened recently. And, oh. The fuck? What's that? No.
00:01:05
Speaker
No, it couldn't be. Oh my god, it is. It's him. He got a haircut. It's clobbering time. Oh my god, hell has frozen over, ladies and gentlemen. Jimmy Fax is back with us on pre-determined, the pro wrestling hangout. Cut my music, cut my music.
00:01:32
Speaker
The FX is back, and you know what? It's good to be home. I've matured a lot. This is a different place. I'm a different person. And you know who I did this for? I did it for all of you. There was nowhere else that you could hear these dulcet tones.
00:01:58
Speaker
possible until I showed back up on this podcast here this week. You definitely weren't on a different podcast before this, right? Like you were...
Convention Tales and Warhammer Stories
00:02:11
Speaker
I mean, I was. Me and Chris did have a podcast before this.
00:02:20
Speaker
I'm not familiar. It was a great podcast. It was the best there ever was. But yeah, we stopped that because, you know, whatever. You know what? You've been gone for 10 years at a board game convention and you decided that it was time to come home.
00:02:41
Speaker
That's right, I ran out of money. And you know what, I was doing, you know, Warhammer podcasts, and I don't know, one of my friends, Johnny, he did a guy, I had to go on a little break, I came back to the gaming podcasts.
00:03:00
Speaker
But then I then I punched one of the hosts in the face for using glass miniature orcs. Oh, no, you got to use break free plastic orcs. That's how you do miniature orcs. So I punched him. And then the guy that ran the gaming studio, I threatened him. I threatened him. So I was going to beat him up. He ran away and then they fired me.
00:03:30
Speaker
But no matter that they fired me, I wanted to be here. I wanted to hear on this podcast.
Dental Dam Delusions and Chris' New Baby
00:03:39
Speaker
I did find it weird that in the lead up to you coming back, you told me I also had to hire Johnny O as the new producer. You do need to hire him. He will not wear any mouth protection. He won't even allow a dentist to clear him of mouth borne disease.
00:04:00
Speaker
When you said mouth protection, I was pictured more like a dental dam than I was like, just, uh, can I just waiting? I am 41 years old and I still don't actually know what a dental dam is. Just don't even, um, well, isn't it? I mean, I guess like I, isn't it something like,
00:04:25
Speaker
it's like a sex thing right like like you can use it as a contraceptive but like is it also the thing that they use to put over your mouth when they're doing like a root canal cuz like yeah cuz I've definitely had that and uh the doctors that none of his cum would touch my teeth yeah
00:04:49
Speaker
I guess that's what it's for. It's just like, hey, it's come tight. That's how they market them to dentists. To dentists and perverts alike. It is weird that it is a condom alternative, I guess, also. I don't understand that part. Honestly, it seems more like a myth than it does a real thing that's ever been used.
00:05:14
Speaker
In my experience, there's three forms of contraception. There's the normal condom, you've got birth control, and you've got the rhythm method. The old classic. You almost caused me to spit this Diet Coke all over my... See, I'm drinking Diet Cokes on here now. We dropped Prime as a sponsor.
00:05:39
Speaker
We did. I'm also drinking a Diet Coke. It's not in the can. I put it into a cup. But yeah, this is a double. We're good Diet Coke boys.
00:06:01
Speaker
It's like Judy from the Jetsons with the vacuum, but it's like a lot small. It's about the size of your, your plastic ork miniatures really.
00:06:10
Speaker
It is, but you always wonder about that. Does she really have that? She got that before she was with me. Is it real or does she want my cum for herself? What does she want my cum for? And how do you know if the robot's broken? How often does your vacuum cleaner just get caught on something? How are you monitoring the shop? Do they have to go in for a mechanic?
00:06:37
Speaker
then check that thing out every few thousand miles.
00:06:41
Speaker
need the tuna. Speaking of cum. We're missing our third boy today. Why are we missing our third boy? Well, because he's got those good sperms. He's got those good sperms. And it made a baby, and that baby has joined the world.
00:07:08
Speaker
And he named it after his favorite movie. He named her after his favorite movie. There will be blood. Magnolia. So we're giving Chris a week off. Just one. Just the one. Maybe two. We'll see. But he's got to hit his numbers by the end of the year. So it's in his own best interest for his own performance review to be back sometime in December.
00:07:36
Speaker
I'm just that's just a fact. That's not judgment. That's a facts fact. And he missed an excuse. I got an excuse. I've got the medical thing. HR has already said, Garrett, that you cannot give me a bad performance review. So there's all the more pressure on Chris. The amount of sexual harassment you've put upon me since HR told you that is
00:08:03
Speaker
I just got like a blank check. I just got the blank check from the podcast. I can talk about whatever I want. I can grab whatever I want. I can use whatever pet names. It's just like, Oh, faxes was on painkillers. So, you know, it's fine. He's medically an asshole right now. I'm licensed asshole.
00:08:26
Speaker
For real though, congrats to Chris. I'm sorry that the episode you were absent from, we talked about Seaman so much in the first 10 minutes. I'm picturing him and his wife, you know,
00:08:42
Speaker
laying down to sleep. They've had a tough day getting the, you know, the new baby down. They have a young daughter as well. They've got a lot going on. And he just goes, hey, hey, honey. I know Garrett and Fax recorded a podcast where they congratulate us. Let's listen to the beginning to it. And it's just me and you just nonstop cum. And his wife, they'll know exactly where it's going. He knows, she knows that we're getting to his cum
00:09:08
Speaker
inside of her creating life. And I'm glad that I've made it even more explicit just now if they're listening to this together. Yeah, you really, you wrote the bit out. You've kind of, you pulled the curtain back. You're like, this is how a joke is formed. This is the setup and we've got it there. Just like...
00:09:29
Speaker
and we might need to make sure there's video like next time because you know obviously i i live not that far i i see chris and his family not infrequently so like i can't wait till my next face-to-face interaction with her after she's heard this where the last time she heard my voice was just me talking about cum and my cum and chris's cum and you know cum robots
Mittens as Santa and Parking Lot Drama
00:09:54
Speaker
Well, I think the next place you all are going to meet up is you're all going to Newark, right? Because ICW announced today that Mittens will be taking photos as Santa Claus. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I assume that children are not allowed there. So I don't know if Chris is going to be able to get away, even his older daughter. I don't know if she's going to be old enough for ICW yet, let alone Santa Mittens.
00:10:24
Speaker
I think that Child Protective Services is just around the corner. It's like when you set up a sting where you tell a bunch of people they want a boat and they come to collect the boat and find out that really they just have a warrant out for their arrest. That's where you just, all the bad parents are gonna come let their child sit on Santa Mittens and they go straight into the Child Protective Services and Papa goes straight in the old cop car.
00:10:53
Speaker
Yeah. I don't know exactly where Mittens lives, but I'm going to assume he's taking a train. There's a big train station in Newark, and I'm just imagining Mittens with a Santa hat on the train late at night on a Saturday leaving Newark.
00:11:15
Speaker
Everyone's going to assume he's a homeless man, right? Like that's how you would probably describe Mittens to someone if like they had to just find him in a card pick. Oh, he looks kind of like a homeless man, kind of crazy, not like dangerous crazy, but just kind of, you know, he shat his pants a few times.
00:11:34
Speaker
Well, he may have shed his pants, but I don't know. I was throwing around the theory today that mittens is, I don't know, possibly like a, I don't know, a tech millionaire, like a secret, a secret one percenter. And this is how he spends his days.
00:11:49
Speaker
He's one of the two extremes, right? Because he's got, he's so invested, he has so much time he spends on this, but he gets good tickets, he gets expensive tickets, right? So he either has means, like he's a secret tech millionaire, because he has means, but without having to do a lot outside of wrestling. So he's got a lucrative position or money that he can just take time off whenever he needs.
00:12:16
Speaker
Or he just still lives with his parents and or on the street and just somehow through the sympathy of others gets everything for free. Mittens is gonna beat your ass next time he runs into you in New Jersey. Which will be in a couple weeks maybe. Oh shit where you seeing mittens?
00:12:37
Speaker
Well, the ICW show, that's like two weeks from now. Oh, you are going you are going good. I think I'm gonna I have something like daytime that day in South Jersey. So I'll probably miss the beginning of the show. But like, assuming it's like I can get like a GA ticket at the door for 20 bucks, even if I show up like an hour late, I'll probably go. Because I mean, let's have you been to an ICW show? The No.
00:13:02
Speaker
They are, like, as far as deathmatch companies go, it is a wild one to go at when Tag and I spent a weekend at one of their shows. I mean, I got touched in the face by the glass, and it really does make you feel alive, and I think it being around the holidays is just gonna bring something out in you that will really come across on the podcast.
00:13:25
Speaker
Yeah, and I gotta think Newark isn't gonna have really any restrictions on what they can do. Like, definitely New Jersey State as a state doesn't really, like, I think there was a show in Jersey City, I think it was a GCW show once, like, years ago where they, like, they set a table on fire, and they did that whole thing, and I was like, well, if you can literally set a fire in the ring, then you can do anything.
00:13:47
Speaker
I thought this was bizarre. I saw that ICW is running a show in Brooklyn, or no in Queens, which is no blood, right? That's very bloody there. Yeah, I mean, it is like a small elk sludge, so they might just be like, fuck it, who's going to know?
00:14:07
Speaker
You know, I don't know how professional, because you hear that like Chikara back in the day, they would do a lot of shows in New York. And I'm talking like the Claudio Castneoli era, you know, so we're talking like probably a decade ago plus.
00:14:26
Speaker
And they, I remember hearing them be like, who gives a shit about us? Like nobody's checking in on what we're doing. Like we're not big enough to actually do. So like we can do, and like Chikara wasn't doing death matches and stuff like that. But like, I think they definitely did some like cage matches with blood and stuff like that when they, I think they weren't technically quote unquote allowed to. So I don't know. Maybe ICW is just like, fuck it. Are they streaming the show?
00:14:52
Speaker
Yeah, it'll be on fight, or not on fight, they're on IWTV. IWTV, yeah. Yeah, maybe that prevents it, because then it's just too, like there's, the evidence is just too easy. We start looking, we're like, actually, Chris lives in Queens, right? Like he's, his basement. Why is Dr. Redacted jumping off of, off of his couch? And also, oh my God, Jimmy Lloyd is destroying his bathroom. Jimmy Lloyd's on the show fighting Hoodfoot.
00:15:22
Speaker
That's incredible. I mean, that's in a non title match. Hood foot isn't throwing. He's like, no chance. No chance. I'd love to see the two of them go at it in a slap fight. I mean, I think it'd be very one sided, but that would be part of the fun. Never underestimate Jimmy Lloyd. That's true. I've learned that one the hard way.
00:15:48
Speaker
Chris, I was almost hit by a car today. Yeah, you texted me this and I explicitly was like, we are not going to talk about this until we have a microphone in front of us. So what exactly happened, Garrett?
00:16:03
Speaker
that the grocery store came. I had my bags, put them in the car, was taking my cart back to the cart corral, put it in. You were a good boy. Yeah, two cars stopped to let me cross back across the street. And as I'm crossing, a car speeds around those cars going very fast. I had to jump out of the way. I am wearing
00:16:26
Speaker
Okay, I have an MBK hoodie on, so I do look a little tough, but I am wearing a pair of purple Crocs, which is, and they were not set to sport mode. So I had to jump in leisure mode Crocs to not get hit by a car. And immediately, a lot of profanities came out of my mouth. And there were a lot of people around, as I'm just swearing at the sky and pointing. I said- He's like, the driver's long gone by the time these are coming out.
00:16:56
Speaker
Oh, yeah. Like, we made we made eye contact as I was, you know, like inches from getting my my knees shattered by a Ford Taurus or something. And as I'm walking back to my car, the car circles back around the parking lot and is coming toward me. And I see that they're windows down.
00:17:19
Speaker
And immediately I throw my hands up in the air and I shout at them, what are you coming to fucking finish me? I was like, I was hot and my heart was raising, I almost died. And then I saw that it was a mom and a kid.
00:17:34
Speaker
And I immediately, uh, I became the one apologizing. She told me that she couldn't, she's like, I'm so sorry. I couldn't see because of the sun. It's like, well, why are you driving fucking 30 miles an hour through a grocery store? It's not simpler that one normally drives terribly fast. Um, I have had a dream so much of my life facts.
00:18:04
Speaker
I've been I've wanted to get hit by a car. But not like run over. I would love to get popped up onto the hood over the windshield roll down like an action movie like a stunt man in an action movie kind of deal.
00:18:18
Speaker
It looked like in that moment, instead of, if I had jumped to the side, if I had just jumped straight in the air, I definitely would have hit the windshield and gone over. Cause in that moment, you can say whatever you want to that person. Cause you've just been struck by a car. You own their soul. You can literally just be like, what's your wallet? Just give it to me. Don't even look first. Just give me the whole idea and everything. All of it. I can't tell you. I'm your dad now.
00:18:47
Speaker
By the way, can I share? I've actually had that same fantasy of that cinematic getting hit. I don't want to get hurt. I have fears about getting run over and losing a limb. That would be terrible. But popping up, getting it maybe on your love handle or something into the windshield, you get knocked for a loop. I play football.
00:19:10
Speaker
probably similar. The worst part for me, though, in this situation, because it turns out in that moment, given the opportunity to have it happen, my instinct was to not get hit by the car, which is kind of it's kind of human reaction, right? Like you I don't think you can
00:19:27
Speaker
Yeah, it's kind of like it's kind of like with my cat where like he's meowing that he wants to be pet. But then if he turns it slightly so he doesn't see me when I finally touch his fur, he like jumps up. You know, you just can't control it. Yeah, you just it's just natural human instinct and not want to be injured.
00:19:47
Speaker
Um, which I hate because it's been like I've wanted this since I was like 15 is like, I want to get flipped over that hood. Uh, but I w if it had happened, the worst part would have been me sitting on the curb crying as I listened to other people describe to the police what's happening where there's like, she came flying around and hit him and his purple Crocs flew, flew away. They're gone. He doesn't have shoes anymore.
00:20:13
Speaker
Or, like, when the officer's coming over to, like, actually interview you directly, and you're still, like, sniffling, and you're being, like, a child, they hit me with the car! Okay, sir, but, like, what exactly were you doing at that point? I was just being a good boy, and she hit me! She hit me! I didn't ask for it, I was just crossing the street, I looked both ways, and then she swerved around the people that had stopped to let me go.
00:20:41
Speaker
I didn't get to go, but my heart was racing there for a little bit with the adrenaline. And I really, when I saw them coming back around, I thought like, who do we know that's mad at me? Like I thought maybe Derek put a hit on me.
00:20:55
Speaker
Because they circled back around and were coming back. Well, he might have put a hit because of some of the messages we've had, but we'll get to that in a little bit. I just want to go back to that when inevitably this recording of this podcast is played in a court of law one day, when you eventually are hit by a car and they use this as evidence that you sabotaged yourself,
00:21:19
Speaker
Chris is a lawyer, so Chris, can you go back when you hear this? And I want you to make this officially legally binding that they have to play it starting at the beginning of the episode. So they have to hear about the cum robot. They've got to hear all about that before they get to Garrett incriminating himself.
00:21:37
Speaker
Uh, can we pause it right there? Um, sir, what's a dental dam? And I'm sitting on the thing in my wheelchair. It's like, well, uh, as far as facts and I are sure we're, we think it's like a little piece of maybe like, um, maybe like, is it, um, latex rubber? I don't know. It stretches.
00:22:00
Speaker
Well, also, if that is what it is, right, which I'm not sure if it is, but if it is that thing, I don't see how a dick could fit in there.
00:22:08
Speaker
Right, because it's like you're not fitting into it. You're just coming straight. It's like coming into a trampoline like not, you know, like I think you pull the whole thing out and it's just like it's like you've come to seem very secure. Right. Like I I can make a pretty juicy explosion and it just has to get around some of it. Like doesn't it like that's the whole point of condom is the right. It's got to be like ninety nine point nine percent. I've seen friends.
00:22:36
Speaker
But when you go to like an ICW show and they're in like a Legion Hall, they cover the nice floor with a tarp so the blood doesn't get all over the floor. Like inevitably a little is going to get to the side, but it covers most of it. Yeah. I mean, but I guess using that analogy, it's kind of like, well, if I've got a taco and I'm sitting in the front row of that show, like,
00:23:03
Speaker
If you eat that taco at the front row of that show, you basically have to be comfortable with eating another man's blood. You've got to be basically have a little John Moxley in here. Okay, Center for Disease Control, how to use a dental dam. Okay, please enlighten me.
00:23:20
Speaker
Dental dams are latex or polyurethane sheets used between the mouth and vagina or anus during oral sex, ready to use dental dams. So this is like, this isn't like, like, this is actually FDA certified usage. This is like a coindication. Oh, my information, I'm sending you the link right now as we speak. This is from the Center for Disease Control. Well, that's what I'm saying. It's got to be fairly official, right? This is a .gov website.
00:23:50
Speaker
Yeah. I love that it opens with this document contains sexually graphic images and may not be suitable for some audiences. Scroll down and see this image. If we have any underage listeners that like their parents have installed things, they can't get any porn on their iPhone. I'm looking at you listeners in Spain. Just Google how to use a dental dam. That's how you can get your rocks off. Oh, yeah, there are images.
00:24:20
Speaker
The images are, so wait, okay. Yeah, I don't think I could get through that. Wait, but seriously, it says carefully open dental dam or roof package. That's step one. Step two, place dental dam flat to cover vaginal opening or anus. That's step two. Then step three is throw away used dental dam. They're missing a lot. Go down one. This is why sex education is lacking in this country.
00:24:45
Speaker
Yeah, my sex ed class was abstinence class, and this shows how you can MacGyver a condom into a dental dam, like how you could turn a condom into a worse thing. I like though- But I notice there's nothing on the effectiveness. How could this, like, there's no way any government agency should have a how-to
00:25:14
Speaker
home rig a dental dam from cutting up a condom. How many babies have happened because of this infographic? And this is why one of the many reasons that Joe Biden is a shitty president
00:25:39
Speaker
Don't use spermicide, which can cause irritation. That just seems like a comfort thing more than... Wait, is it like... Wait, it says don't stretch a dental dam. That's one of the don'ts. So how exactly do you take a flat sheet, put it over a vaginal or anal cavity, and then penetrate said cavity without doing that?
00:26:04
Speaker
I guess I don't. Is it like, okay. So the photo I'm seeing of the lady, she's got a little square and is holding it over. Am I supposed to like duct taped that to her body and then just like, like, I think it really is like a trampoline. Like you're just like, boing, like, you know, going. I feel like it's just going to go in.
00:26:25
Speaker
Why would this, I don't know that this is better than just not having sex. Oh, for sure. I mean, I need a video of how this is. I just feel like the comfort isn't going to be there. So you might as well just wear a condom, which I feel is a much higher percentage of working.
00:26:46
Speaker
And I, would you, okay. Wait, does it, by the way, do you use a new one every time? Do they really need that? Or do you think there's people trying to reuse dental dams and condoms? If you were with another human and they don't have a condom on them, but they're like, I do have this box of dental dams, that feels like a red flag. Yeah. Unless they're a dentist or maybe oral hygienist, you know?
00:27:17
Speaker
Also, that's really funny though, to like put that in your mouth. Like that would look insane. Yeah. I think it would actually like, I mean, maybe it might become my new thing, but it would just, I feel like it would be, God, what a weird first half hour of this show. We've had seeing punks back and we spent. Speaking of calm receptacles.
00:27:48
Speaker
CM Punk's back home, Garrett.
CM Punk's WWE Return and Spite Debate
00:27:52
Speaker
He's back where he belongs. He's, yeah, he's a different person. He's, um, that was insane. So, okay, I don't want to spend, we're not going to spend the rest of the predetermined, like, watching this and shitting on CM Punk, but he did get me to watch a full three hours of Raw for the first time since Derek was on the show.
00:28:17
Speaker
And he got me to watch a YouTube clip for the first time in a while. Um, but one thing that he did not get is we were talking, you know, cause interestingly on Saturday night, you were watching survivor series to see if he showed up. I was actually watching full gear because I've been really busy and I've been way behind and I was catching up. But me, you and Chris all hopped on a call together to talk about our various wrestling things.
00:28:46
Speaker
And then punk came out. Chris had turned the show off. I remember Chris was like, yeah. The bug. The bug came up. Chris turned the show off. And then all of a sudden, I'm watching AEW. And then you're just like, ooh. Like, you just looked like a zombie. And then we figured out why. And then we were joking around. We were like, well, where's Raw on Monday? And I was like, it's not still in Chicago, right? And Chris was like, it's definitely not in Chicago. And then you're like, well, how funny would it be if it's in Nashville?
00:29:15
Speaker
And it was in Nashville and tickets were not that expensive and they still did not get you to buy a ticket.
00:29:26
Speaker
It was one of those words like, there's a time for this show that I would travel to whatever weird nonsense I needed to. And that just seemed like too much time. I have to fight traffic to get downtown. I have to park. I have to get there. I'm certainly gonna spend $25 on a pretzel and a beer. And then sit there and watch Raw.
00:29:54
Speaker
Well, it also would be weird to be there in an arena of like 10,000, 15,000 other people, but like they're having the opposite experience that you are. Um, where it's like, it's, it's, it's like if you've ever seen your home sports team play on the road and then the other team wins and just everyone else is super excited and you're just bummed out. Like, I feel like that's the way it would feel.
00:30:22
Speaker
A hundred percent, well, yeah, being there for sure. And as a St. Louis Blues fan, the only team I ever really get to see them play live is the Predators, and I've never seen them win here, so I know exactly how it feels to be sad in that arena. And I've done it enough times that I just didn't, I don't know, like even that day, because we were like, well, maybe, maybe, maybe if they confirm CM Punk will be there and they're like, oh, he will be.
00:30:48
Speaker
bridge sends me an email that's like Garrett, you can get in the door for $20. Yeah. And I was like, ah, but I still have to walk. It's time, right? It's more time than money. Like, I got like, again, that's why I didn't even I was pretty sure punk was going to go on last and then obviously before the show.
00:31:11
Speaker
somebody, probably Chris or somebody on our Instagram group, you know, shared that that was like the spoilers, like, yeah, he was going to be wrapping up. And it's like, I don't I don't know how much you'd have to pay me to go to a three hour live raw. Like it's just I don't like, hey, listen, anyone that's really happy to see CM Punk on on raw and in WWE,
00:31:35
Speaker
Great for you, man. It's not for me. It reinforced why even when punk was suspended, or whatever you call it, when he was gone from AEW before, I guess he was technically out insured, but also kind of sort of suspended. I basically hung to terms that I was done with CMP.
00:31:59
Speaker
And like everything he has done since has really reinforced why, and the promo on Raw very much fit that theme, you know?
00:32:13
Speaker
Like I don't want to just shit on people who like WWE. Cause like once again, it's, you know, the wrestling ice cream, different flavors. Sure. And like what you like. Cause I will say watching it, like I was genuinely shocked at how bright and shiny the production was.
00:32:30
Speaker
Yeah, for sure. I forget that it's like some of the most crisp sports. It's presented well. It's bright, shiny, you are watching something that is fucking expensive. I guess what I just don't understand, though, is the person that CM Punk appeals to,
00:32:56
Speaker
Yeah. Feels like they should probably be the person that's moved on to AEW, right? Like it doesn't feel like what CM Punk was good promos that actually made sense and actual good kind of long for WWE standards wrestling matches. Like it just feels like if that's what you like, why are you watching Raw where they just have a hundred really short matches
00:33:25
Speaker
And nonsense. Well, I mean, I guess it would be because like you don't really like. This feels like condescending and kind of like you're not like super into wrestling like wrestling doesn't super matter to you. Because like I don't remember who I read this today. Somebody was saying like.
00:33:45
Speaker
They had just watched it for the first time in a while as well, like most people did. I'm sure the ratings on this were fucking huge, because so many of us were like, what's he going to say? And it turns out like nothing. But like the things that get reactions on these shows are the entrances and the finish to a match.
00:34:04
Speaker
Right. Everything in between is just like blank staring at, I mean, okay, I'm looking, every match on this show is under 10 minutes, except for the first match, which was a tag team turmoil match that went 26 minutes almost without a commercial break.
00:34:23
Speaker
Dear God. Which is like super long for a WWE TV match, for sure. It's like you're asking for the commercial break. Like, can I get a Twix commercial or something to give me the picture in picture? Well, I think it's also like interesting, like when you look at Punk's promo on Raw versus his promo on, was it the first or the second rampage?
00:34:47
Speaker
It was the first. It was the first rampage. Like, it just seems like he had absolutely nothing to say. Like, on the raw one. It's just like, he didn't say anything. There was no substance, there was no purpose, there was no mission statement. Like, it was very unlike Seeing Pumpkin. Interestingly, the thing that got me back into wrestling, I guess for the third time, yeah, I was into wrestling as a kid, came back during the Attitude Era, kind of stopped watching it, and it was the Pipebump Era, the Reality Era that kind of brought me back.
00:35:16
Speaker
Kind of for good, at least to this point. And for me, it was actually Bret Hart coming back, which was just before the pipe bomb, which is actually, I guess, very similar of like, hell would have to freeze over. There's no way Vince McMahon and Bret Hart could ever be in the same room together. And then Bret Hart was coming back and I'm like, oh, I got to watch this. And like a few weeks later was the pipe bomb. And like Bret Hart didn't get me to watch Raw again. Like he got me to watch a Raw one time again.
00:35:43
Speaker
And I got it to like, oh, maybe during Monday Night Football, I'll flip the channels. And then I saw the pipe bomb. And then that kind of really built into this thing of like, oh, this is actually good.
00:35:53
Speaker
And I think about how that kind of worked, right? These people that were like teenagers in the attitude era had gotten older, you know, they're adults now and like punk and then other guys that they started pushing, like they started really pushing Daniel Bryan more around the same time or a little after. John Cena was kind of perfectly positioned as this white knight baby face that was kind of an easy heel for the reality era. It all kind of worked really well to talk to that audience.
00:36:21
Speaker
And so I'm interested to see where WWE goes here. I don't have a lot of confidence, but hey, Triple H has done good things at times. It'd be interesting to see, well, okay, you got CM Punk. I'm sure that got some people watching Raw that haven't watched Raw in a while. But what are you going to do with it? Because I don't think CM Punk wrestling matches every week is not going to happen. And it's not going to be exciting, right, for a long period of time. So I just want to see what do they do with this?
00:36:48
Speaker
It's gonna be funny if there's the irony of him being a part-time guy that- Take somebody else's WrestleMania slot, yeah. Which honestly, I mean, he worked there before. He saw how you get the main event, WrestleMania spot. You leave and you come back as part-time and get that fucking job. And I don't know, it's- Or be big.
00:37:11
Speaker
Just be physically big, like Roman. Right? Like, Roman never left. Roman's a lot younger than Punk, and Roman's worked a hell of a lot of WrestleMania main events. Randy's beefier than I remember him being, too. He's a beefy boy. He also seems like he's younger than he was a few years ago. Has that somehow happened? Randy? Is it his son? Randy or the third?
00:37:39
Speaker
We removed a dental dam, put it in a tube, and we've been growing a Randy Orton for years. And he's finally come of age and size, where we can just throw him in, call him the apex predator, have him hit an RKO to a guy, and it hits the same, except he's better at the death. Every time Vince has to tell one of the cleaning staff to clean cum off his desk, he definitely refers to it as he was growing Randy Ortons.
00:38:12
Speaker
Put it in the specimen jar. Don't make me open the specimen jar. Heavy air. I was trying to grow a few Randi's. I got it all over the place. There's some on the dinosaur. Somewhere there's a lab that's just a bunch of faulty Randi's. It's like this one.
00:38:34
Speaker
It's like I just watched Alien Resurrection for the first time the other day. There's like a Randy Orton that's all got all like weird arms and is like all fucked up and just he runs into himself and he's saying like, kill me, kill me, please. Well, that's why they're making, you know, NXT into an even bigger show and now it's going to be a network show. Real developmental is the Randy Orton lab. That's the only developmental that matters.
00:39:04
Speaker
is they're gonna perfect this army of Ortons. And that will be when Vince can finally die happy. He will not be happy that he can leave this world until he knows there's an army of Randy Ortons ready to take over WWE prime time broadcasting.
00:39:21
Speaker
Uh, they storm the arena in like the DX Jeep, but it's just a whole bunch of him bags. Like nobody's bags are safe. You know, there's too many bags that could be shit and make more of him. Yeah. Well, and Randy would love it because, you know, if you get clones of yourself does make passing a P test a lot easier.
00:39:50
Speaker
You just need one clean Randy to provide the urine for everybody. Who is just chained up in the corner like Paul Dano and prisoners. He's like. Getting the shit be pissing this. Please don't make me piss. This boy. I don't want to make it seem like I didn't enjoy any of this show. Yeah, there was a very enjoy.
00:40:21
Speaker
So there was a running segment throughout it where R-Truth kept popping up because the country singer Jelly Roll was there, which it's funny because, are you familiar with Jelly Roll? I'm not. Is there any Dixie Sugar lyrics that I should be aware of?
00:40:42
Speaker
He's like, as far as I know, he's not like a, he seems like a pretty decent guy. Like he seems, he's very popular. As far as I know, no problematic lyrics. Like he seems like a pretty good guy. Like he was a rapper before, but he's a very large man. Like- I imagine, I'm glad, I was gonna ask, I'm glad he's large. Cause with a name like Jelly Roll, I'm thinking a large fella. And so I'm glad- You should Google him. Cause he looks like three post Malone's.
00:41:11
Speaker
Like he looks like three Post Malone's inside a trench coat is this guy. But. Oh yeah, no, that's very accurate. That is a very accurate description. But what's funny is a buddy of mine. He was a rapper first. That's that's not a transition you see every day.
00:41:38
Speaker
But there is like a point where like, if you are willing to do it and sing about church. I mean, Kid Rock did it, right? Kid Rock was, was he ever technically a rapper? He was kind of that rap rock era. And then he just became a country singer. He definitely fancied himself that, yeah.
00:41:59
Speaker
I know a friend of mine that's from Nashville was like, he said that guy by his real name. He's like, that's insane how famous he is right now. He's like, that guy used to sell us weed in high school. But Jelly Roll's on the show and like they keep making a, he's there and
00:42:19
Speaker
R. Truth walks in and he's like, jelly rolls? Where are the jelly rolls? I want to eat the jelly rolls. And I'm like, no, he's jelly rolls. He's like, you got the jelly rolls? That wasn't in itself funny. But there's a part later where he's got powdered sugar all over his face and a tray of jelly rolls. And, uh, Judgment Day are around him and Finn Balor for some reasons dressed like he's ready for bed.
00:42:38
Speaker
And the whole show, he never left this like big black sweatshirt he was wearing that looked super comfy. Like he definitely had some PJ pants on below the camera that we're not able to see. We were talking, he's been in WWE for like a decade at this point. So he's, he's just like probably just riding out the contract where he's just like, I'm good. I'm set for life. I'm done wrestling. I'm just going to kind of be the guy in sleepwear in the background.
00:43:05
Speaker
while mommy talks. I still got the abs under here. Yeah. But R-Truth looks at all of Judgment Day that are surrounding him and lets them know that he would like to be their fifth for war games, which is just like classic R-Truth joke. Right. Offering to be in a thing that already happened. Yeah. I never mind R-Truth. The classic R-Truth joke, particularly when it's not like a weekly thing, it's like, I don't know, I could see how that'd be amusing.
00:43:35
Speaker
Legitimately, one of the funniest moments I can remember in WWE is that Royal Rumble where R-Truth runs down the ramp, grabs a ladder, puts it in the ring and climbs it, and looks around confused because there's no briefcase hanging off the ring. What's a great joke? That's a great joke.
00:43:55
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, that's the thing with with with our truth has to carry like five segments on every show. That's where it gets to be. But like a little bit of our truth could go a long way. And I think the man consistently earns a paycheck and looks fantastic for how well he's got to be in his mid 40s at this point, right? I'm pretty sure he's in his 50s, right? Yeah, born in 1972. He is 51. Looks fantastic.
00:44:24
Speaker
Yeah, he still looks, I mean, he still looks like R-Truth, like he looks the same. But the matches on this card that I watched for three hours was this tag team turmoil. Who won? I guess the Creed brothers won, which I was not familiar with. They must have been a NXT guys that got called up or something. So no relationship with Austin Creed? Who was also in the match? Okay.
00:44:54
Speaker
But it's the Creed brothers are Brutus Creed and Julius Creed. They won. They beat DIY, who I didn't know was still there. I mean, I feel like I think I knew both guys were still there, but I didn't know that they were like a team.
00:45:10
Speaker
I feel like the entire night was just like, oh my God, I forgot he was there because I just haven't watched a whole show. I guess Nakamura had re-debuted in Nashville. He showed up for the first time in Ring and he called out Cody. He red misted Cody and Cody sold that like a freaking actor. Yeah.
00:45:33
Speaker
I didn't know Shinsuke was still like, I literally forgot that Shinsuke Nakamura was in WWE. Like, I don't know. He just escaped my brain as somebody who was still around. Well, especially with all like the layoffs, right? That they lay people off every few months. That's just like, if you haven't heard their name because they haven't fought Roman, it's like, I don't know. I just kind of assumed most of them got laid off or were asked for their release to go to AEW or in his case, probably back to New Japan.
00:46:01
Speaker
Yeah. Well, he was just having such a good time surfing down in Florida. Yeah. That it's like I can't like once again, it's kind of like I can't fault punk. Like if you back a Brinks truck up to my house.
00:46:15
Speaker
I'll tell you last night was the best show I ever watched. I'll sell out in a second, so. Yeah, but it's understood you and I never had any integrity. We never planned. Yeah. You know, we never pretended to. Whereas that's kind of was punk's whole thing, right? Is taking the higher ground. Because that was Pierce's old bit. Yeah.
00:46:37
Speaker
But the other matches we had Bronson Reed, which is Jonah Rock versus one of the Viking Raiders. Nia Jax versus Zoey Stark had no, I thought Nia Jax got fired. She did a thousand percent got fired. So I guess she's just back. Chelsea Green and Piper Nevin versus Natalia and Tegan Knox. How is with all the people that have got fired and people that have been fired and come back, how has Natalia survived all of that?
00:47:07
Speaker
Like what kind of incriminating evidence does she have? She's a heart. Yeah. She's never pissed anybody off. And doesn't she have like the most matches in the history of WWE? Oh, she's, I mean, she's got it, right? I mean. Like she's probably been on every raw for the last four years. I don't know if she digs a brick. Well, I feel like she, no, I feel like she takes like months off sometimes that she's not on TV because it's just, she's 99 or you can just bring her back whenever.
00:47:37
Speaker
but they'll never get rid of, you know, good for her, good for her. And that shows all the- Maybe that Randy and Dominic, but sorry, go ahead. I was thinking that's all the sadder with Teddy Hart. The bar for staying employed as a true-blooded Hart is not that high. I mean, you look at Julia Hart, she's not even a real Hart. She's winning titles on AEW. Teddy got a peacock show. He was the star of a peacock show.
00:48:06
Speaker
So by the way, so Randy, you were in Dom's theory. I want to go back to that. So how does that, how does that finish? Does that have a clean finish? Does just Randy go over to something bullshit need to happen?
00:48:19
Speaker
So that you're asking me to remember a match I watched last night. Randy won and it was Dom and there's this other guy, JD Madonna. I think that's how you say his name that was in the war games match from the night before that I
00:48:37
Speaker
I he was the one that I think Chris and I were describing as if like Adam Cole, Joey Janela and in a rock hard Juice Robinson had a baby. It would be this man. Yeah. He did. He did take a cool move in the he took a RKO off like the top of the cage or something. Cool. They threw him down and Randy caught him on the way down. But always the pro radio.
00:49:05
Speaker
I don't know, but then it ended with five minutes of punk telling me he's back. He's home. He's a different guy and he's just, he seemed so happy and he looks good. It's kind of nice. I like, I like the new haircut. It's good haircut. Um, but yeah, it's, uh,
00:49:21
Speaker
It's a little striking to the I'm home nonsense. And I don't think he's doing it for the money. I think he made a- It's a spite job. It's a total spite job. Because by all accounts, he didn't come to AEW for money, even though he was paid a lot. It wasn't like he needed money. But he's also a man of said integrity that he's going to get every time that he's due him.
00:49:47
Speaker
And then he made a lot of money in the year and changes of the AW. So yeah, it's clearly just a spite thing. And it's like, I don't, is he spiting Tony Khan? Is he spiting AW fans? Is he spiting Kenny Omega? I don't know. The real person that needs to interview him is Larry David. He's like, yeah, it's a, it's a spite job. He's not taking a spite job. It's good. It's so true.
00:50:19
Speaker
Like, I mean, I get it. Like, I've definitely, there's grudges that I don't even remember how it started, but that I'm still holding, you know? Like, I don't remember. I don't know. As I get older, right? And punk is older than I am. I would say that while I agree with the sentiment and when I was younger, there's pretty much nothing that will get me to work longer than I have to. I'll do a lot of things for spite. Work is not one of them.
00:50:46
Speaker
travel ever however many days a year like there's are they gonna get fucking see him punk to go to Saudi oh okay with that
00:50:57
Speaker
Oh, I don't think he would, but if that's what you got to take for the spite job, because if the rumors are that they're paying him a substantial amount, and apparently it's a multi many year contract, which again, we know this is a WWE contract, which means they can end it at any time, but that means at least theoretically on Punk's side, he's locked in for years.
00:51:21
Speaker
Like, A, that's insane. Why would they sign into a law? Where it's just like, who's the other offer from?
00:51:28
Speaker
Like, why would you need to give him a long-term deal? But again, I'm sure it's a way WWE can leave it at any point. But I feel like there's gotta be concessions there, especially if they're paying him that much. It's gotta be, I don't think he's gonna wrestle a whole lot, but I think that it's gonna be, you're gonna have to be on TV this amount of frequency. And I definitely bet you're gonna have to do a Saudi show. Like, how hard do you think the Crown Prince came when he heard the punk music at the end of Survivor Series?
00:51:56
Speaker
Like that's your target audience. He was air guitar in his palace for sure. Oh yeah. I'm surprised there's not like an Instagram reaction video of the Crown Prince watching that show. I did see that Live in Color is going to be at the Ryman soon opening for Xtreme. For Xtreme? Oh, I do. More than words. Right? I'm more likely to go to that show than I was Bridgestock.
00:52:26
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, Living Color is a great band. They're great live. They're not a... Even in Riot Fest. Yeah, I think Living Color, I'd see them any day of the week. But yeah, one song is a little bit different.
00:52:42
Speaker
It's, Punk is confusing to me because I don't really, like I feel like if me and him just talked about similar interests as far as like music and how we feel about, you know, I feel like we have like similar like political beliefs and also just like trans rights and I feel like there's a lot of things Punk and I could agree on. I just don't think his wrestling
00:53:07
Speaker
and the Black Hawks would might keep us from being friends. Well, I also don't think like the more I learn, the more I feel this is true, because I feel like the image of who the real CM, who the real Phil Brooks is becomes clearer with each passing year. And I feel like he's not someone that talks with you. He's someone that talks at you. So I feel like you would be like, yeah, like blah, blah, blah. Like you'd be like, name a band that you like that you think CM awkwardly.
00:53:39
Speaker
I bet CM Punk likes black flag. So you'll just be doing something like you'll be talking about black flag. And then like three minutes later, CM Punk will be like, Oh, you know, Ben, you guys should all check out his black flag. Like not even acknowledging like he literally didn't even hear what you said. And, and then he'll probably try to see you.
00:54:06
Speaker
might try and sue. That's the hard part.
00:54:10
Speaker
is, yeah. Well, I would say that since that stuff, I've never been fully back on punk. I actually, when he first came back in AEW, I was extremely skeptical, and I was kind of against him. And then when they did that, which is now prisient, like Long Island dynamite with MJF, who was the hardcore heel, but he was the babyface there and played babyface, and punk playing inside kind of as the heel. Seems oddly prisient of where we are now. And I was so behind that.
00:54:40
Speaker
Because, listen, CM Punk with that first promo on that rampage, he did win me back to a certain degree because he's a hell of a promo, right? And he could still work on the ring, like his matches for the most part in AEW were good.
00:54:56
Speaker
But yeah, the person, I've really never, obviously I was a huge fan, but since even the Colt Cabana stuff, I've really never been all the way back on him. And then the more we found out about the backstage stuff, it kind of, again, things start solidifying in my mind where I'm like, yeah, he's a bad person. Like he's actually a bad person.
00:55:21
Speaker
And I'm not saying he's like a war criminal. Yeah, I'm not saying he should be in jail or something, but I'm just saying, I would never want to be friends with him in real life. Yeah. Like, yeah, he doesn't fall into like a Louis CK, like Kevin Spacey, like problematic kind of person. He's kind of, he's just a dick. He's just a dick. Yeah.
00:55:46
Speaker
And he, that's fine. And you just kind of realize, even with the pipe bomb, it's just like, yeah, you know, like that guy, that's the Dick or the bully, like when they're being a Dick or a bully to the thing you also dislike, it's easy to get on board with them. But then later when you just realize they just want to complain about everything and they want to rage against everything, you're just like, Oh, not everything isn't horrible.
00:56:14
Speaker
Maybe it's you. Call me crazy. But hey, listen, I'm not watching Raw. CM Punk isn't getting me to watch Raw. However, with the sale, with Hunter being in more control, with some new TV contracts getting signed, if this is the new beginning of something, I'll keep my ears open. I did cancel my peacock subscription. Even at $1.99 a month, I wasn't getting the value out of it. I just wanted to delete an app from my TV home screen.
00:56:43
Speaker
But like, hey, I hope it gets better. And I hope it gets good. I hope, you know, impact or TNA as it's now going to be called again, gets better. I hope, you know, Billy Corden shit. I hope that's six.
00:56:57
Speaker
even throw the gun off. Because that's just funny. I don't want it to stay completely. Yeah, I don't want it to stay. I need it to stay just afloat. Like, I need Billy and Tyrus on the door. You need Billy to stay just afloat, right? Because that's really the thing is because, I mean, they're hemorrhaging money and they always have. It's really just you need Billy to be making enough money playing Disneyland with smashing pumpkins to keep supporting
00:57:23
Speaker
this just siphon of funds that is the NWA. I think that we need to do some sort of bet where the loser has to get a tattoo of Billy Corrigan and his nice shirt holding that Mickey Mouse in front of the castle that says the NWA above it.
00:57:47
Speaker
That's the shirt. That's how you make money. Like, he's so funny. He's so funny. Like, I get it. He's got to do that show so that he can have the money for the plane tickets for the boys down to Colville.
00:58:01
Speaker
Right because later in the month because again like up until a few years ago like Billy Korean is a who's a Fantastically wealthy man, you know, like he had tens of millions of dollars He owed several businesses in the Chicago area like but now some of the things coming out since that cocaine spot that ruined his TV deal his chance of finally making at least a dime on NWA is like he's been spending millions. He's been losing millions and millions of
00:58:30
Speaker
It's on the app. They didn't take him away completely.
00:58:50
Speaker
It's going to make up for how much money they're putting into this roster and the studio and stuff. And that's come out and like, no shit, that's true. Billy's just been spending a ton of his own money. I'm sure his wife and family are thrilled that their super famous dad is broke because he has to pay, you know, the guy that used to dance like a dinosaur.
00:59:18
Speaker
Well, I think, yeah, I mean, EC3 is their guy now. Like, they're strapping the rocket to EC3. That's right. Who still owes me fucking $7 or a comic book?
00:59:32
Speaker
And I hope it's the comic book. I really do. I, me too. That's all I want. He's just like, I've got writer's block, man. It just, I can't get, I can't get it out of my head. He's going to hold you hostage. Like there's going to be like a Kickstarter for like, how much are you willing to pay to get me to actually finish this comic book? And I'll throw in, I don't know. I'm not going to say on the air, the number I'd throw out there for, for this comic book to happen, but it's, it's higher than $7. I can assure you of that.
01:00:02
Speaker
I wonder if he quietly refunded me and I just never noticed because he was embarrassed. Cause if I see him though, like I'm a hundred percent going to be like, Hey man, I gave you like seven bucks for that comic. Like what, when's that coming? And also when you're going to put those shorts on discount from the control of your narrative, you got to have just fucking box of those in your garage. Me and Chris want a couple. We're having 30 bucks plus shipping.
01:00:30
Speaker
It is, it is crazy that those things are not on sale. I mean, that was my Christmas plan was I was just buying, going to buy one of those for every member of my family. Cause I was assuming 50% off, but you know, hasn't happened yet. Did you check the store in black Friday though? I forgot. Chris and I did. Okay. Hmm. Not on sale. Sons of bitches.
01:00:54
Speaker
Maybe, maybe, maybe that's the thing is maybe there are no shorts, the same as there is no comic book. Just most of the items on there are just like, well, no one's ever going to buy this. They're just trying to make it, they're trying to make it like look like a smarter buy to buy like the EC3 t-shirt or the beef seasoning. Because, you know, they're real. There's legitimacy to have more items.
01:01:20
Speaker
There's going to be a certain point where we realize like this was all a figment of our imagination. Yeah. And just control your narrative was never a thing. EC3's your Tyler Durden. He is handsome. He is handsome and fit. Kind of rugged in his own way. So I have to shoot myself in the head?
01:01:48
Speaker
Yeah, I think that's how that's how you end it. That's how that's how nwa's lights go out
01:01:58
Speaker
They're counting one, two, slow motion, me just bang. And then he just disappears. Well, I always still think about like, we'll talk about sometimes like how wild it is that we're like,
AEW Tournament Hopes and American G1 Speculations
01:02:10
Speaker
if you had went back in time and told us, hey, we're on like year four of like a wrestling company started by like Kenny Omega, the Young Bucks and some rich guy that liked them.
01:02:19
Speaker
And like blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Cody's going to be WWE champion. And like all these things we would have been like, oh shit. I think the wildest thing of all though would be is that like me and Chris.
01:02:32
Speaker
Two, our most common shared interests were always wrestling and music, and particularly we had a big crossover with the Smash Republicans. Chris and I have been to the Smash Republicans concerts together. We've been there separately. I've seen Billy Corgan do solo acoustic sets. I've seen the Smash Republicans play in at least six different states.
01:02:53
Speaker
So, big fan, if you had told me in like 2014, like 10 years from now, you guys are gonna be on a podcast joking about how much money Billy Corgan is losing airing a free 80s inspired wrestling show on YouTube. I would have just been like, what? What? What? Really feels like a mad libs.
01:03:21
Speaker
Yeah, and by the way, you don't like the show. I would have been like, what? That sounds like exactly what I like. I mean, you might like it. You just aren't giving the current product a chance. I will admit, I've gone in and out on NWA a couple times and I never have a bad time. It's just not enough to kind of keep me back. And because it's so episodic, it's not really like,
01:03:50
Speaker
built to kind of like dip back into. Compared to say, AEW as I found out when I missed a bunch of shows, I could just kind of dip back in, no problem. NXT is generally pretty good with that. I don't know if it currently is, because now there's a lot of main roster people that come down, but generally even once it went to USA, NXT stayed very accessible that you could just kind of dip in for an episode and just kind of catch up quickly. I think WCW back in the day was like that, but yeah, NWA doesn't, not really good for that.
01:04:20
Speaker
Oh, man. Do you know what? I started, because last week on the show, we had mentioned this. I said I was going to start like looking at some IWA or, yeah, IWA Mid-South. Yep. And I caught a show, like I just started looking because there's such a deep catalog on IWTV of their old shows. And I caught what I think was a pay-per-view.
01:04:48
Speaker
And it was, um, the main of that. This wasn't the main event of the show. This was the semi main. Okay. CM Punk versus Eddie Guerrero versus Ray Mysterio Jr.
01:05:03
Speaker
That's insane. Necrobutcher was the main event. Of course, of course, as he is. Still is. In every American burger in the country. The same amount of people at this show too. It's so insane because
01:05:20
Speaker
And the match was good. It was good, because you're looking at Eddie Guerrero is in shape. Him and Ray both look like superstars. They look like they just came straight from WWE, which Chris kind of told me the backstory of what was happening. I believe he said that Eddie had been let go from one of the companies because of drugs at this time. And he was doing an indie tour to try and regain some
01:05:48
Speaker
Yeah, I remember that from the Eddie Guerrero book that he talks about. He was WWE. And that's where he then came back. And when he came back from that to WWE is like when he got the mega push and won the world title and stuff like it was the beginning of like that kind of he hit his at the time rock bottom. Unfortunately, he'd heard a rock bottom layer. But yeah.
01:06:13
Speaker
But still, he had been on national television every week for like a decade at that point. Yeah. And now he's wrestling a title match in a barn in Indiana in front of, you know, 40 people. And not that CM Punk wasn't good in the match. It's just like, I mean, you're looking at like two guys that are just like, you know, larger than life superstars look super in shape. And at the time, CM Punk looks like a guy that
01:06:43
Speaker
would live on Jimmy Lloyd's couch and Jimmy Lloyd would be like, you could stay on my couch, but you better not eat all my funyuns while I'm sleeping. Young CM Punk does look like the prototypical indie wrestler that never becomes anything. Like he just look wise, you know? But obviously he got past that. He did.
01:07:06
Speaker
And it was really great. I'm trying to think who else cash flow that we talked about from the Netflix wrestling show was on there. And he like he looked great back then, too. Like he was like a very fit, handsome young man. It was fun. Like Chris Hero was on the show. It was just the mood to watch Chris, you know, cash will ever get like a cup of coffee anywhere.
01:07:31
Speaker
Did we ever look at that? I mean, it seems like there. It seems like a lot of his wrestling was at IWA Mid-South. But nothing ever, like he never got a cup of coffee on like TNA or? I mean, I think he may have made an appearance. I would have to. I'm on his pro wrestling Wiki page right now. I believe he wrestled on AEW not long ago, but it was like while they were filming the Netflix show.
01:07:57
Speaker
Yeah, so his pro wrestling doesn't seem to be, but let's see, let's look at his cage match. What do they got? Career highlights is blank. His career highlights just has 1996 beginning of active in ring career. That is the only highlight they've listed. Yeah, I'm just seeing OVW. Oh man, yeah, like when I pull this up, it is just OVW stuff.
01:08:27
Speaker
And RMP, which I've never heard of. No, no. He seemed like a really good guy on that show. And he was definitely one of the most likely. Oh, no. AEW Dark. August 21st, 2022. He was... I see that he... He lost the trust bus.
01:08:51
Speaker
June 8th, 2023, cashflow defeats EC3. Oh, but it says DQ. So EC3. Cheated. Not shot. All right. Well, we can, we'll do the, when things cool down, which I don't know if it's going to happen, right? Cause we're going to have an AEW pay-per-view at the end of next month, then into the Royal Rumble and, and, you know, stuff like that. So we've got to find a week to do a cashflow deep dive.
01:09:19
Speaker
Really like hit, yeah. I'm in, I'm in. I watched one, it was him and Chris Hero and fuck, I feel like an old ECW guy. But yeah, it was nice, it was nice. I'm definitely gonna keep doing some IWA Mid-South. It looks like there's a good mix on those. In 2021, also in August, he was in a JCW Bloody Mania Battle Royal. Mm.
01:09:46
Speaker
I don't know why, is that, no, that's gotta be a different JCW because it's in Ohio. Well, JCW did tour for a minute. Cause I know JCW did have some shows at Pops. That's JCW to Juggalo Championship Wrestling. I was thinking Jersey Championship Wrestling, like the GCW affiliate. Now it was an unofficially affiliate for a while.
01:10:15
Speaker
Still, yeah, it's a lot of... Oh, I just found out right before we started recording, a friend of the show, Kevin, who's a film critic here in Nashville, invited me to a advanced screening of The Iron Claw, a week from Thursday.
01:10:35
Speaker
OK, no, no spoilers. I was actually just thinking about because I believe it comes out. It's that weird thing where it says it comes out the 22nd, but all of the showing started on the 21st. I don't know why we still do that in like late 2023, where you like we call them preview screenings, but like every theater in the country does them. So correct. Is it really a preview or is that just is just opening day as the day before it's listed?
01:11:04
Speaker
The movie starts at 7 p.m. on a Thursday, you know, that's just the orthics or whatever. But like you can see it in Palookaville, you know, Pennsylvania. It's not like you're walking the red carpet in Beverly Hill or, you know, at the Chinese theater and like you're at the premiere.
01:11:22
Speaker
Whatever. But I assume that I will probably not be able to talk about it until I bet I have to. I don't want to hear about it because I want to experience like I'm OK to get your visceral knee jerk. Like it was great. I loved it. It was trash. I hated it. Or.
01:11:40
Speaker
I don't know. I was just kind of like, I don't know what to make of it. You look happy regardless. And obviously I know the story. I'm going to see regardless, but I kind of want to go in blank. But I was actually just looking that the 21st is the first day I'm supposed to be away for holiday stuff with my wife's family. And I don't get back till the 26th.
01:12:00
Speaker
So, uh, I don't know, we need my New York guys. We got to see if like, should I see it while I'm down in, in Maryland with my wife's family? Should I, uh, can we all wait and see it together? Cause I do want to see it with my boys, if possible. What's the, uh, wrestling situation with the in-laws? What do you mean?
01:12:22
Speaker
Like, did they watch? Are there any fans on your wife's side of the family? No, no fans. But I mean, they're they'll tolerate it. Like, I don't think anyone really cares one way or another. But it's like, are they going to hear this? No. Are they subscribers?
01:12:41
Speaker
I think my wife's sister did listen to the episode where we were talking about all of my penis troubles, because she had read a blog I had written about my experience with cancer. And I'm like, she's like, I want more of that. And I'm like, well, I did a podcast where we talked a lot about it. And then I sent it to her. And then afterwards, I'm like, oh, wait, by the way, don't play this while your kids are around. It's very R rated. They're going to hear Uncle Jim say some stuff.
01:13:06
Speaker
Um, it's under the first 30 of this one as well. Yeah. Well, maybe I assume she's a subscriber now. Um, now she heard that one. Yeah. But I think like if there was a big show, um, like I would just watch it and people would kind of like come in and out of the room and maybe sit down for a moment, but no one's going to watch the whole show.
01:13:29
Speaker
But I would say my brother-in-law is always looking for an excuse to get away and see a movie just because he's just overwhelmed all the time and he loves seeing movies and he never has a chance because, you know, kids. And so now where it's like my wife will be there, you know, there will be a lot of family around, there's other people to help herd the children. So usually every Christmas he and I can sneak out for a movie.
01:13:56
Speaker
I'm sure he would see anything I was OK with seeing. So if I'm like, the only movie I will see is The Iron Claw, I think he'd be like, OK, I got some tickets for six o'clock tonight. And he's already overwhelmed and doesn't realize that you're dragging him to the saddest shit that he'll see this year.
01:14:17
Speaker
Yeah, well, if he gets good reviews, I'm sure he'll be into it. He's a movie guy. He likes, uh, he likes the movies. So... He likes a prestige picture from A24. That just made me think, like, this is a bad movie to send someone into blind, I think. Yeah.
01:14:36
Speaker
But at the same point, it is made for a more broad audience. It's not like they made this movie for wrestling smarts. This is a prestige picture. It's got a star. It's A24. You're not going to need to know about wrestling. I think it's more you should prep people if they're not aware of this is not going to be a happy story.
01:14:59
Speaker
Like, I don't think you need to spoil what happens, but I think it's just like, like, I remember when we watched the documentary, The Rise and Fall of the von Erich Dynasty, or whatever it was called. And I remember me and my brother watched, I think it was one Thanksgiving, and my mom was there. And this is like, you know, probably 10, 15 years ago, when it first came out.
01:15:19
Speaker
And I remember my mom just being, yeah, horrified because she had no idea. Like, she remembered the name Carrie Von Erich from when we were kids and like watching. But like, she knew even about Fritz Von Erich because, you know, I think I mentioned my parents used to watch shows down in Florida back in the day and they would sometimes reference him and stuff like that. My dad knew who he was. But like, my mom had no idea the larger story of the Von Erichs and she was like,
01:15:48
Speaker
So. That's. Yeah. And. How do they end that movie? Like, what's the uplifting end of that movie? Right. Because I feel like with something that's where it's set so far in the past, like you can't just end on nothing but downers. Or maybe they just say. Somebody will drive a motorcycle into the sunset. Teddy Har. Teddy.
01:16:13
Speaker
And then that's the uplifting thing. It's like, but, but they didn't have Teddy Hart, Teddy Hart, not a Von Eric. That is a happy ending. I mean, the current Von Ericks are, are fairly well respected. They seem good at what they do. They seem like happy, complete people. And I wouldn't say that Teddy Hart. Where are they?
01:16:37
Speaker
I don't know. I mean, Rick Flair show, but I don't, I've never, I don't feel like I haven't seen them since. Well, they were doing, I thought I had heard that like, cause they, they were obviously doing MLW. They were like a top attraction in MLW. And then I heard their MLW contracts ran out, but it like, I thought I had heard that like they weren't even like kind of really trying to sign anywhere.
01:17:01
Speaker
So like, I wonder if they're just like free agents or whether they're like, yeah, maybe at some point, you know, uh, we'll go to AEW or something. Cause I would think they probably could get one of them. And especially now with like a couple of like the new TNA deal, uh, the NWA deal, even MLW, I think as a, as a deal somewhere. They'd be a real big surprise in Colville.
01:17:23
Speaker
Yeah. Honestly, maybe with this movie coming out, maybe it's good business where they're just like, we're not going to have contracts that way when this movie comes out. Tony Khan or Vince McMahon might give us a call, which is probably accurate. Look at Nick Gage's mainstream surge in popularity from that dark side of the ring. This movie is going to be a lot bigger than Dark Side of the Ring.
01:17:51
Speaker
That's true. Like I, I guess like we kind of, we've certainly hit a point where it doesn't seem like they're going to promote this movie on either show. I think it's too fucked up to like for wrestling to be like, this is good for us. But then you have Zac Efron and the, I can't remember the actors, Jeremy Allen white. So that guy from the bear. Um.
01:18:15
Speaker
Yeah. Uh, Jeremy Allen white. Yep. Jeremy Allen white. Both of them said they would be interested in wrestling. And that seems insane that like one of the companies wouldn't want to jump at the chance to like do something in ring with Zac Efron.
01:18:35
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, and there's huge and we I mean, like, we saw that the guy that played Green Arrow, like he was pretty good when he wrestled, you know, and obviously Logan Paul, not an actor, per se, but a celebrity. He's done really well. I think the Green Arrow guy was in the crowd at full gear. I'm pretty sure he was sitting behind the announcers the entire show. Yeah.
01:19:02
Speaker
Which you liked, you liked that match? I'm sorry, which match? I didn't think I was dazing. Full Gear. Oh, the Swerve match? The Swerve match. Oh, it was delightful. It was so good. The only thing that... So actually, what is now probably my most anticipated match that could realistically happen that I'm so much more excited for than anything CM Punk will do in WWE ever is a main event
01:19:31
Speaker
Mox versus Swerve. Because I watched that, I literally watched Full Gear Saturday night, and then I went to bed, and then I woke up Sunday, and the first thing I did was watch Dynamite the next time, and it had that Brisco versus Mox match. And I was just like, man, if you could just take that match and energy, throw Swerve in there, how good is that gonna be?
01:20:02
Speaker
And I mean, we're going to get that match in this tournament, but I'm saying like a PPV main event level. Well, yeah. No, you're right. Like, damn. That would be very, very sick. What do you think about this tournament? I get that they're trying to do the G1 thing, but...
01:20:22
Speaker
I'm, and so far one weekend they haven't done this, but I just feel like American booking, like, are they going to start doing too many screw job finishes and not really do the spirit of the G1? Because if they do it right, like I've wanted an American G1 forever. So if they actually do it, and one weekend I feel pretty good about the way the first week went, most of the matches were clean or mostly clean.
01:20:50
Speaker
And, uh, yeah, it could be everything I've always wanted. I think there's definitely like, we were kind of talking about this. It was really nice that there aren't like just straight up jobbers in it. Like, it was definitely like, uh, you guys are like, they're not going to win it, but they'll at least be fun and competitive. Well, and like, like the G1, you think they'll at least win a match or two at some point. Cause there's no like young boys. Yeah.
01:21:18
Speaker
I mean, we'll see how it goes. I think it'll be fun. Like I'm looking forward to a lot of the matchups and it'll be a good time. Yeah. And I think for me, like a lot of the tournaments is the reason I realized like Tony Kong goes back to it. I think a lot of people are accurately critical to any tournaments, but it gives really easy focus of something to build to week to week. So that's why I love this where it's like just run it for six weeks straight or because I think they said they're running it straight through the December 30th pay per view.
01:21:45
Speaker
And that's where the finals are going to be with the winner of the two blocks, I guess. So I'm looking forward to it. You're going to get three great matches every every dynamite and every collision, you know, for the foreseeable for the next month and change. So I just hope they don't fuck it up.
Event Plans and Scheduling Struggles
01:22:03
Speaker
Are you going to be at the pay per view?
01:22:05
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. Myself, Chris, and friend of the show, Professor Tom, we are all planning going to the show in Long Island on the 30th, and then they're gonna be in my backyard, Newark, possibly Mitten's backyard, for the dynamite after. And that we did not buy tickets for, but we have an inside play to potentially get some sweet tickets.
01:22:33
Speaker
Um, oh, nice. And if not, you know, we'll just buy tickets, stay on off Stump Hub or whatever. Cause if you know anything from the comment sections of pro wrestling, there will be seats at an AEW show.
01:22:46
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, there always is, right? Like, even when AW uses Ed's Peak, you know, when they went to the big hockey and basketball arenas, there typically were seats that, like, even when they sold out, it's that they did a generous layout. And then whenever they sold out, they magically could always open up more seats. And then half the arena kind of felt empty. So listen, I don't care about things like that, like how good a show is and how many people buy tickets for the live have nothing to do with me. It's just, you know,
01:23:16
Speaker
It's the wrestling I like to look at. I prefer it full, for sure. And again, if anyone else in my group were 100% going, I'd have bought tickets already.
01:23:30
Speaker
I can literally walk to the show. I won't, but I could. And for me, it's literally one train stop. So I'll almost definitely be going to that show. I just feel no need to buy tickets in advance if the rest of my group is like, oh, let's wait to see if we get these sweet tickets for free.
01:23:46
Speaker
Great. I'll go for free. I'll pay for ticket. I don't care. I'm definitely going. But I also get that it's a lot, right? For most of our people in our group have kids and stuff. It's like, honey, I'm taking off the Saturday before New Year's to go to a wrestling show on Long Island all day. And then three days later, I'm also leaving to go watch another wrestling show in Newark. Like for no one, both of those locations is convenient. That's true. Yeah.
Closing Thoughts and Future Teasers
01:24:17
Speaker
Well, I'm excited to hear we need to get Professor Tom on here. We need to send you all with microphones and just record from your seats. I didn't do it. But I think we need to ramp up here. We are hitting the time limit. Yeah. The one we've set in our own minds, I guess. Yeah. Because you weren't by yourself. Um, I just want to remind Beastman that he's beautiful. Um, that's it.
01:24:46
Speaker
Beastman, there's some flowers coming your way. All right, everybody. Thanks so much for listening. At pre-determined podcast on Instagram, at Gartet, at Chris Miggs, at Jimmy Lloyd's IMDB page, AKA, at Jimmy Fax. That's right. I'm back today. I'm home. Next week, will we still talk about dental dams? There's no need. We know about them now. What will we come up with next week? Tune in and find out.
01:25:41
Speaker
Had our goddamn music.