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Ophelia Black in her own words
1.1k Plays1 year ago
Ophelia Black is not just a young woman who lives in Calgary who likes to read fantasy romance novels and cross-stitch, she's also proof that safe supply programs can work. When the UCP tried to take away her treatment plan she took the government to court, and won. Black joins Duncan Kinney to talk about her case, the life she's built for herself thanks to her treatment and why the UCP are trying to kill her and other intravenous drug users.
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Transcript
Introduction to The Progress Report and Ophelia Black
00:00:00
Speaker
Hey folks, Duncan Kinney here, host of The Progress Report. Today we're speaking with Ophelia Black, a young woman who lives in Calgary and who beat the UCP in court to at least temporarily continue to take a treatment of safe supply hydromorphone that has absolutely turned her life around. She has an incredible story and I'm really happy that we got to sit down and have an extended conversation with her.
Ophelia's Strength vs. Duncan's Past Immaturity
00:00:22
Speaker
I mean, when I was 22 years old, I was a fucking idiot.
00:00:25
Speaker
Uh, and I was an idiot who hadn't gone through nearly the same amount of terrible shit that Ophelia has had to go through. And then also she's come out of it and has able to talk about it so cogently, so clearly, so effectively. I'm really excited for that conversation, but also.
00:00:41
Speaker
We are still a member of the Harbinger Media Network, and I would like to recommend the latest pod from Justin Brake at Berrygrounds.
Podcast Recommendations and Support
00:00:48
Speaker
In his latest episode, he digs into the details of a wind to hydrogen company that's owned by a billionaire that is trying to develop a project on the Porto Port Peninsula.
00:00:58
Speaker
The trouble is, of course, is that many of the locals, most of them indigenous, are pushing back against the project. Like many industrial projects before in Canada's history, this privately owned company, owned by a lobster billionaire, John Risley, is criminalizing indigenous land defenders.
00:01:14
Speaker
Justin Brake is a very solid journalist who you may remember from the time he got arrested by the RCMP when he was covering another indigenous land of interaction at the Muscrat Falls Hydro Project in Labrador. I'm so glad he's a part of Harbinger. Give his latest pod. Listen, it's really good stuff.
00:01:30
Speaker
And of course, if you like what we do, if you regularly listen to the pod, if you get our newsletter, if you like the investigative journalism that we produced, please consider becoming a recurring donor. Our content will always be 100% free, never behind a paywall, and it is listener supported. So if you can donate, please do. There's a link in the show notes, or you can just go to theprogressreport.ca, and there's links there that make it really easy to donate.
Ophelia's Court Victory and Safe Supply Struggle
00:01:55
Speaker
Now, onto the show.
00:02:10
Speaker
Friends and enemies, welcome to The Progress Report. I am your host, Duncan Kinney. I'm recording today here in Amescochi, Waskiagan, otherwise known as Edmonton, Alberta, here in Treaty 6 territory on the banks of the mighty Kasiscosa, Iwanissippi, the North Saskatchewan River.
00:02:25
Speaker
Joining us today is Ophelia Black, a 21-year-old woman living in Calgary who recently won in court in order to have an exemption from harsh new rules that were brought in by the UCP with regards to prescription opioids.
00:02:40
Speaker
and she's now able to continue the treatment that she otherwise would have had to have stopped because the UCP are so anti-safe supply, so anti-harm reduction, that it would have put onerous new restrictions on her visibility to continue her treatment. Ophelia, congratulations on your win and welcome to the pod.
Rediscovering Passions After Stabilization
00:03:00
Speaker
How are you doing? Thank you so much. Thank you for having me. I really appreciate it. I am doing very, very well. How are you?
00:03:08
Speaker
Good, good. So what are you reading these days? I think you mentioned off air that you were reading romantic fantasies, fantasy romances, something like that. Yeah, I really love reading. Like my favorite series is A Court of Thorns and Roses. I cannot recommend that highly enough. Yeah, that's what I wanted. I wanted a specific recommendation. So there we go.
00:03:30
Speaker
Oh, I have so many. The Umbra King, that's also really, really nice. The Gilded Plated Prisoner Series by Kennedy, that's also wonderful. I'm considering starting The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue by Schwab.
00:03:49
Speaker
City of Gods and Monsters, the second book just came out, so I'm starting the second book as well. Oh, oh, From Blood and Ash and A Shadow in
Ophelia's Journey Through Abuse and Addiction
00:04:00
Speaker
the Ember. Those are two series by the same author, but they take place like thousands of years apart with different main characters, and they are both like such compelling, wonderful love stories.
00:04:14
Speaker
Yeah, I really love reading. I could go on for hours with my recommendations and opinions on books.
00:04:21
Speaker
No, that's dope as hell. Uh, I, this is, I mean, we do mention it briefly. And I was like, damn, I, I definitely want to hear what you're reading. So thanks so much. Um, even at noise, um, cause you know, I know everyone at noise really, really well. And them asking me what I'm reading is a pretty common question. And I've also gotten like five of them into reading as well.
00:04:44
Speaker
Oh, nice. The Shadows Between Us by Levin Cellar, that is also literally my favorite book ever. There's also a new book that came out called The Curse of Ophelia, which the main character has my name and it's fantasy romance. So I really want to read that one as soon as I can. But yeah, I've gotten so many people after reading fantasy romance. Awesome. And Norse is something we're going to get into later. It's something you use kind of regularly in the course of your treatment. But yeah.
00:05:15
Speaker
I think it's important to talk about shit like that because all of the talking you've been doing to media recently has been around this case. It gets into pretty intense personal details about your past, your life, your drug use, your experience, and stripped away from all that is the fact that you're just a 21-year-old in Calgary who likes to read fantasy romance books, right?
Impact of UCP's Drug Regulations on Ophelia
00:05:40
Speaker
Well, I turned 22 recently, but yes.
00:05:44
Speaker
Yeah, I love fantasy romance. I love to paint cross stitch. My mom and I spend every evening together like watching a show right now. We're watching Ginny and Georgia while we like diamond paint or cross stitch, things like that. My cat lies on my lap. Like, you know, I'm a person. So, yeah, the thing is, is though, is that this, the upper government, the UCP, we're trying to bring in changes.
00:06:14
Speaker
to, to, to your current drug treatment that would have put you in mortal danger, right? That would have, that would have made you more likely to die. Yes. Right now, very little chance of dying. If they had brought in their rules and you hadn't won your court case, you would have gone back to use it stated in the thing. You very likely would have gone back to using street sourced opioids. You very likely would go back to,
00:06:41
Speaker
regularly overdosing like you were years and years ago, right? And like, that's the thing too. Like, you know, with my prescription, there's been a massive change in my mindset, a massive change in how I see myself, how I see the world, things like that. So now the thought of going back to fentanyl, like that fills me with like absolute dread and terror. And I really, I don't want to do that, but,
00:07:11
Speaker
you know, when I'm not on my prescription, like that mindset changes again, because with my prescription, I care a lot about my health, I care a lot about my safety, but, you know, when I don't have that, when I don't have the thing that keeps me stable, then, you know, things change. And even though right now, the thought of going back to fentanyl terrifies me,
Overdose Experiences and Treatment Journey
00:07:38
Speaker
I know that if I was desperate, if I lost my prescription, then, you know, street source opiates would likely be my only option. And let's get into it. Like, I think, I think your background and context is important, right? And like, you are a regular intravenous drug user. You use hydromorphone, a prescription of hydromorphone.
00:08:09
Speaker
Yes. On a regular basis, right? I think three times a day, you were saying? Yeah. And actually, I just took my dose a half an hour ago at 11 o'clock, 11 o'clock exactly. And as you can hear, I'm coherent, I'm present, I'm not falling asleep, I'm not slurring my words. This isn't like using fentanyl.
00:08:38
Speaker
Yeah, you're not nodding off. Exactly. You don't need a shot of naloxone to come back like you are able to kind of go about your day and do the things that you want to do after you do it, right? Yeah. Yeah. And I think that is important to point out.
00:08:56
Speaker
And so, well, let's, and let's take a little step back to like how you got to the point of being someone who chooses to use intravenous drugs. I know, you know, we talked beforehand about, you don't necessarily want to get into the details, but it's when you were a teenager, you had, you experienced
00:09:18
Speaker
physical and sexual abuse at the hands of someone else. And that person- I mean, that was like, it was after I graduated high school. So it wasn't like a young teenager. Okay. I was still very, very young, definitely way too young to be experiencing that. But, you know, I wasn't like 14. Yeah. Okay. Very fair. No, it's important to be precise about here. And you were introduced to hard drugs by this person.
00:09:48
Speaker
Um, you know, you were assaulted, you required hospitalization. When you were in hospital, you were given, you know, the drug you were on now, intravenous, intravenous hydromorphone. Yes. Um, I remember like, you know, when they finally took a look at me and they were like, Oh my God, she needs some pain relief. So the nurse brought the injection of hydromorphone and,
00:10:14
Speaker
The first thing that she said to me right before she put the needle in my arm was, you'll like this. She was right. Yeah. And then you eventually get out of the hospital. You were given a prescription to manage your ongoing pain. This abusive relationship continued.
00:10:40
Speaker
And as once your prescription ran out, you turned to, well, one, you got dope sick, I imagine, right?
00:10:48
Speaker
To an extent, not as much as I would right now. But a big thing that motivated my substance use back then is that I always struggled with mental illness. For the first 18 years of my life, I didn't know what it felt like to actually be happy.
00:11:12
Speaker
I experienced a lot of anger. I experienced a lot of sadness. I experienced a lot of just feeling nothing, feeling numb. But I didn't know what it felt like to actually be happy. And that's not because there was anything in particular wrong with my life. My brain just, I guess, doesn't release those neurotransmitters by itself. I don't know.
00:11:38
Speaker
you know, there was like basically a perfect storm of situations like I was in a relationship before that that was really, really good. I cared about that person a lot, but I basically used him in place of medication. And you can't give someone the role of being your medication. That's not fair to them at all.
00:11:59
Speaker
So, you know, that relationship ended. Then COVID started and I couldn't even throw myself into my work to avoid feeling it. Things started to get really, really complicated. It was like this perfect storm of terrible, overwhelming, difficult situations. And, you know, I just wanted to die, like between my mental illness and between everything that was going on in my life.
00:12:27
Speaker
I really just wanted to die. And I knew that a lot of people have died from using intravenous opiates. So I thought that, you know, maybe that would kill me. I hoped it would. And you used these street sourced, you know, down street source opioids for a while, right? This, this, and your, and your life got,
00:12:51
Speaker
really shitty, that you couldn't hold down a job, you couldn't continue with your school, you declared bankruptcy, you overdosed numerous times. Can you tell me about that at all? Well, the thing with overdosing is that there's a lot of things that you can do for harm reduction. I know a lot of those harm reduction things now, but
00:13:21
Speaker
When you're using fentanyl, when you're using street source opiates, harm reduction helps, but to an extent because of how unpredictable the drug supply is, you know, it almost doesn't matter how many harm reduction measures you're using because there's no way to know what you're actually getting. There's no way to know
00:13:49
Speaker
You know, there might be fentanyl in one part of what you get, but not as much in another part. So then you can measure out the exact same amount, but it's going to be way stronger. And you know, that's the problem. Like you can do everything possible to stay safe. And by the end of the time that I was using fentanyl, by the time I was ready to stop, I was doing everything I could to stay safe.
00:14:20
Speaker
But you know, it doesn't matter because, because of how unpredictable it is. Yeah. Like you have had a firsthand experience with Alberta's poison drug supply, the drug supply that has killed so many people. Yeah. On both sides of the overdosing equation, I've been the one administering Narcan and I've been the one who is being Narcan.
00:14:44
Speaker
Yeah. And like, and you're telling me firsthand experience being as safe as possible using all the harm reduction stuff. It's still, you could get just because you have no idea what you're doing. You'd have no idea that like what you're getting, what the dealer said it was is what it is. You have no idea about the concentration or the quality or whether one part of this, of this, of this nugget is like stronger than the other. Like when we talk about a drug poisoning crisis,
00:15:12
Speaker
I think this type of like firsthand experience you're telling me about is like why it's important to frame it that way because it's like, yes, you were addicted. Yes, you kind of were in the throes of addiction, but like lots of people are addicted to lots of different substances that don't necessarily don't have such a high percentage chance of killing them because they don't know what's in it.
00:15:39
Speaker
And even alcohol, for instance, alcohol is legal. You can go into a bar and buy it. You can get it at the store. And when you get it at the store, there used to be prohibition of alcohol. And then people would make it themselves, and they would sell it, black market, and they might not have done it right, things like that. But even alcohol, alcohol withdrawals can cause seizures. Alcohol withdrawals can kill you, just like with benzodiazepine withdrawals.
00:16:08
Speaker
Like, you know, alcohol is legal, but it can still be dangerous if, you know, if you're taking like moonshine, for instance, and, you know, it's homemade and you don't know how it was made. Like, was also a dangerous time.
00:16:30
Speaker
Exactly. Prohibition is what makes the drugs dangerous. And so you're dealing with this addiction. At some point you decide, I don't want to do this anymore. What leads you to going to seek treatment?
00:16:45
Speaker
Well, first I tried to go on suboxone. Um, I spent a couple of months on suboxone and, and what is suboxone? Just, just for everyone is a medication. It is the primary treatment for opioid use disorder.
Life Improvements with Hydromorphone
00:17:06
Speaker
Um, it's a combination of buprenorphine and naloxone.
00:17:15
Speaker
As well, buprenorphine is actually a very, very strong opiate, but the way that it works is that it fills the opiate receptors. It's such a strong opiate, so it kicks off any other opiates that might be there, so you can't really feel any other opiates. They won't attach because they're not as strong as buprenorphine. And even though it attaches to the opiate receptors, it doesn't cause any of the opiate effects.
00:17:45
Speaker
or at least not the desirable ones. But I mean, you were saying that there were certain undesirable effects from taking this treatment that you experienced. Yes. You took Suboxone and what happened? How did it make you feel? What did it do to you? Well, first of all, even the government has said that the majority of people can be stabilized on Suboxone.
00:18:13
Speaker
But even with that wording, the majority of people, and that's the thing, like it works for a lot of people and that's fantastic. And it not working for me doesn't invalidate all of the people who it does work for, but it doesn't work for me. Even in a majority of people, there's going to be a certain percentage who the medication is not compatible with.
00:18:34
Speaker
For me, I took it exactly as directed. I waited until I was in withdrawal to start taking it. I didn't take anything else while I was on it.
00:18:50
Speaker
But it was it was terrible. I couldn't keep any food down. I couldn't sleep properly, but I also didn't feel like I was completely awake. I didn't feel completely present. I felt like I was just watching my life. I felt nauseous and sick all the time. I felt absolutely horrible. And it also my mental illness and migraines, all of that came back
00:19:20
Speaker
really, really badly. It wasn't even so much withdrawal that I was feeling. It was just that the medication wasn't compatible with my body. And so suboxone doesn't work out. What do you try next? What's next as you go through these, as you're trying to get treatment, as you're trying to get better?
00:19:40
Speaker
Well, with the Suboxone, for the record, to this day, lemon Gatorade tastes a lot like Suboxone. I still cannot drink lemon Gatorade. It makes me feel nauseous. I will literally gag because I guess my body remembers how nauseous and how hopeless and how out of it
00:20:05
Speaker
I felt when I was on the Suboxone. The Suboxone for me was like taking the worst parts of being on fentanyl and the worst parts of being sober and just combining them. Like even my mom has said that like she remembers how horribly the Suboxone impacted me. Like even she does not want me on Suboxone ever again. Cause even she could see like how badly it impacted me.
00:20:34
Speaker
Yeah, it just did what you're telling me. After that, eventually I stopped taking the Suboxone completely. And, you know, for a while I tried to just be sober. Just like cold turkey. Pretty much. I think that lasted for about a month, a month and a half, something like that, because, you know, I wanted to wait enough
00:21:04
Speaker
for all of the opiates to be out of my system to give it like an honest try. And, you know, like opiates, what they do is they basically make your brain release happy neurotransmitters. So, you know, growing up for the first 19 years of my life where I could not feel happiness, where I didn't know what it felt like, that was really, really difficult. I barely made it through that.
00:21:34
Speaker
I struggled with self-harm a lot, things like that. It was a very, very chaotic time. I had a lot of suicide attempts, but at least I didn't know what I was missing. But since opiates make your body release those neurotransmitters for happiness,
00:21:55
Speaker
after I stopped taking the Suboxone and I tried to just go completely off of opiates. Like I knew what I was missing now. Does that make sense? Yeah. Yeah. You had experienced joy. You had experienced like what happiness feels like. Yeah. And it was just like, it was even worse because you know, now I knew. Um, but you know, I, I did my best.
00:22:24
Speaker
to stay off of opiates and it was terrible. I ended up, first I ended up going on to amphetamines prescribed by a doctor. Then when that wasn't enough, then I went on to methamphetamines because I pretty much just kept myself busy all the time. Like I would sleep for an hour a day. I would just be busy, busy, busy, busy to try not to feel, you know, everything.
00:22:54
Speaker
And, you know, that wasn't sustainable. I ended up having a couple nervous breakdowns. Um, there was a while that, you know, I was in the hospital like pretty much every night of the week because I was having nervous breakdowns and paranoia and terror and things like that. Um, then I relapsed onto fentanyl. Um,
00:23:24
Speaker
But when I was first using fentanyl, even though it was very, very chaotic, I kind of started to, I kind of stopped wanting to die, if that makes sense. Because when I first started using fentanyl, that was my motivation that I wanted to die. But since the opiates were causing my brain to release those happy neurotransmitters, I stopped wanting to die.
00:23:52
Speaker
It was very, very chaotic. I definitely wasn't very careful, but that is one big change that it made. And that was a big motivator for me to try to recover. And, you know, in my opinion, I know that a lot of people consider recovery to just be, you know, are you off of whatever your substance of choice is, whether that's fentanyl, whether that's alcohol.
00:24:19
Speaker
And if you're off of, if you're abstinent from substances, then they consider that recovered. But I think that there's a lot more to it than that. I think that recovery is also about the mindset. It's about like, are you a healthy person to be around now? Do you care about your own safety? Do you no longer take dumb risks?
00:24:40
Speaker
things like that. I think that those are also really, really important factors for recovery. I don't think recovery is as simple as just being abstinent. I'm sure that everyone has heard the phrase of being a dry drunk where you don't drink anymore, but you still act exactly the same way as you did, which is actually my grandfather.
00:25:05
Speaker
you know, I relapse onto fentanyl. This time I tried to be a lot more careful. I tried to, you know, practice harm reduction wherever I could. I didn't have any more overdoses at that point, but I knew that it was only a matter of time because, you know, using fentanyl is really, really dangerous. So I ended up deciding that, you know, I've,
00:25:32
Speaker
tried being sober and there were a lot of reasons that that didn't work, like including my mental illnesses, including the cravings, including like, you know, there was a lot. I tried Suboxone, that didn't work, like I couldn't go through my life being physically sick all the time, throwing up all the time, feeling very out of it, having headaches, things like that.
00:25:59
Speaker
And I thought to myself, you know, maybe there's a middle ground here. So I ended up finding a doctor who was willing to try something other than just prescribing me more Suboxone. And first I was prescribed a mestlon. My doctor talked to the director of the clinic and they agreed to try prescribing me a mestlon to take intravenously.
00:26:28
Speaker
I tried it and I told her, you know, that doesn't feel right. That doesn't feel safe. You know, I don't think I can do that. And I asked like, you know, I've tried before taking hydromorphone pills intravenously. Could we try that? So she said yes. And we weren't expecting it to work as well as it did. But
00:26:59
Speaker
There were so many changes that have happened ever since I've gotten this prescription. Like, you know, I paid off my debt. I quit smoking cigarettes. I still vape right now, but I've actually decided that
00:27:16
Speaker
You know, when I got the injunction, I changed from 20 milligram nicotine vape solution to three milligram. And if I managed to get like a permanent exemption that I'm going to quit taking nicotine completely, like 100% quitting. But yeah, I already quit smoking cigarettes. I quit taking amphetamines for a while. I had a dextrin prescription, but I stopped taking that. Um,
00:27:47
Speaker
My heart rate is actually healthy now instead of being way too high. I used to struggle with an eating disorder and now I eat whenever I'm hungry. I'm still thin, but I'm healthy thin instead of being underweight. I no longer hate my body. I no longer hate myself. I no longer take
00:28:12
Speaker
dumb risks, I'm a healthier person to be around. I care very, very much about my own safety and looking after myself, looking after my health. I spend more time with my mom. I'm closer with the people around me. There have just been so many changes that have happened. Now, when I wake up in the morning, I no longer feel disappointed that I woke up.
00:28:43
Speaker
I also now get enough hours of sleep. Like previously before my medication, I would sleep for maybe like two hours in a 24 hour period. Whereas now with my current dosage schedule, I fall asleep around midnight and then I sleep until like six, seven in the morning.
Legal Battle Against UCP's Threatening Regulations
00:29:04
Speaker
And so all of this positive, all of these positive changes in your life, feeling like I don't want to go on for 15 minutes, but no, but yeah, like you're doing better. It sounds like you're doing better. All of all of the positive in the changes in your life kind of stem from the fact that you have access to a safe supply, a prescription of hydromorphone you take on a regular basis that like,
00:29:31
Speaker
essentially everything positive in your life is flowing from your ability to take this treatment. The treatment basically provides a foundation, a foundation of stability. And it's allowed me to build a life on that foundation. Actually, while I was really, really depressed and while I was struggling with various substances and things like that, I didn't read.
00:30:00
Speaker
I didn't cross stitch, I didn't paint. All the things that I enjoy doing now, you know, I didn't do those things. Like the last time I read was when I was in like fifth grade. And I used to love reading when I was a kid. But then when my mental illness got really bad, I stopped doing it. And it feels so great now that I'm reading for pleasure again.
00:30:26
Speaker
And then the UCP government introduced new regulations around your treatment. I think not in the fall, right? I've been on this treatment for two years.
00:30:39
Speaker
Two years now, that's a long time. I also have not had a dose increase in over a year. Even a month ago, I was offered a dose increase. My prescriber even said, gosh, it's been a long time since you've had a dose increase. Are you sure that you don't need more? And I was like, yeah, I'm sure. I don't want more.
00:31:04
Speaker
And so back in the fall, the USB government introduces changes to how October, yeah, to how prescriptions like yours would be handled. They essentially, they were micromanaging how you and the like 30 or 40 other people who have similar prescriptions were able to access your treatment.
00:31:29
Speaker
your treatment regime would essentially be dictated by, you know, some guy, sorry, what's that? It would be destroyed, not just dictated, but destroyed. Yeah. They wanted you to take it. They wanted you to take it in person, in front of a doctor or a nurse at a specific location downtown. You know, you don't live downtown. You live out near Spruce Meadows. Yeah. Far away from downtown.
00:32:01
Speaker
Whereas, nothing had changed with regards to your treatment, you had been taking this, your hydromorphone regularly, there had been no issues with your treatment between you and your doctor, and all of a sudden the UCP say, we're gonna introduce all these new measures and regulations because the reason they gave, or the reason they give is because they're worried about diversion, right? They're worried about the drugs that you're using,
00:32:29
Speaker
to stabilize your life and to get healthy, they're worried that some of those drugs might up on industry. That's the reason they give officially. My own personal reason is that the USP government hates people who use drugs and wants to see them suffer and that these measures are incredibly vindictive. But again, that's just my own personal statement. You don't have to necessarily follow on that one. But
00:32:51
Speaker
These measures get introduced in October and how do you feel? Like what is the first thing that you comes to your mind when you start learning about these changes that are coming? Terror, sheer abject terror. Like I have never felt before in my life and I've been through some really, really scary situations. Terror that the government was going to take away the thing that was helping you stabilize your life, right?
00:33:18
Speaker
Exactly. And I mean, you know, maybe one day I will be ready to go off my medication. I don't know. Like all that matters to me is that I am healthy and happy and able to build a life. You know, that that's what matters to me, whether I do that on my medication or whether I do it off. But maybe one day I will be ready to go off this medication. But that has to be my decision. It has to be something that I'm ready for.
00:33:48
Speaker
And with these new regulations that the UCP wants to impose, there's a lot of reasons that it would cause a lot of damage. I have worked really, really hard to come up with the perfect schedule for taking my medication and
00:34:13
Speaker
you know, the clinic where they want me to go in order to take this medication, you know, it, it has certain open hours. So my schedule right now is I take 24 milligrams at 11 o'clock. I take 20 milligrams at 8 PM. And then I take four milligrams when I wake up around, you know, six, seven in the morning. And
00:34:43
Speaker
you know, the clinic that they want me to go to, it closes at 6 45. It opens at around maybe 8am, something like that. So it's actually closed for two out of three doses that I take. Um,
00:35:09
Speaker
And as well, you know, if I was to take the evening dose at like 6.45, 6 p.m., well, 6.30, not 6.45, but you know what I mean. If I was to take it early, the issue with that, because my schedule used to be 9 a.m., 6 p.m., and then 3 a.m.,
00:35:32
Speaker
But the issue with that is that if I take the dose at 6 p.m. or 6.30, then I get tired way too early. So then, you know, 9, 10 o'clock, I will be trying my best to stay awake. And then by the time it's like 11 o'clock, by the time it's midnight, by the time it's actually time to go to sleep, I'm completely awake and I can't go to sleep.
00:36:01
Speaker
So then I would be awake all night, or I would have to wake up at 3 a.m. to take the next dose. And then after my 9 a.m. dose, I would fall asleep.
00:36:18
Speaker
because I wouldn't have been able to sleep. I always slept enough hours. I was always well rested ever since getting my prescription, but I wasn't always sleeping those hours at the right time. Whereas now, with taking my dose at 8 p.m., now I get tired at 11, I fall asleep. I sleep until 6, 7 a.m. Sometimes I even go back to sleep after 6 or 7 a.m. after I take my four milligram dose.
00:36:43
Speaker
But the clinic isn't open for that. So I wouldn't be able to take the doses at the right time. I would go back to not being able to sleep at night. And I would go back to not being able to, like, I do skip the dishes with my mom to make money. 6 p.m. is the dinner rush. That's when you make the most money. I wouldn't be able to do that. We wouldn't be able to, you know, make money that way. And I do need money.
00:37:13
Speaker
And so you learn about these changes, you get a sinking feeling in your stomach, you are terrified, but you don't just be like, you don't just take it, you actually end up hiring a lawyer and taking the government to court. How did all that come about? Well, the thing is, is that
00:37:38
Speaker
Like again, there's a lot of reasons why these new regulations don't work. Like it's the open hours. If I was taking transit to go back and forth, I would be spending 12 hours a day on the bus just going back and forth. I wouldn't be able to go to school. I wouldn't be able to have a career. And those are two things that are really important to me.
00:38:00
Speaker
The government has said that they will pay for a taxi to take me back and forth, but that's still four or five hours a day spent in a taxi. That means I wouldn't be able to go back to school. That means I wouldn't be able to have a career. And even if the taxi brings me down to the clinic at 8 p.m. at 6 a.m., it doesn't matter because it's not even open.
00:38:30
Speaker
As well, I did end up trying the NTS. I did end up going there for one day. I tried it and never again. Regardless of the outcome of the lawsuit, I will not be returning to the NTS. The doses there were way stronger. That was one issue actually because when I'm
00:38:56
Speaker
dumping out like the six pills that I use for my morning dose, that's a very, very specific amount. Maybe I don't know exactly how many milligrams end up getting into my shot from those six pills, but it's always the same. It's always the same strength. When you are drawing up a vial, there's like, you know, according to someone in the medical industry that I talk to, there's like a 20% margin for error. And
00:39:26
Speaker
It was way stronger than I was used to. Way stronger. And I didn't like that. By the time I got out to the car, I was extremely out of it. I couldn't read, I couldn't run errands with my mom. I was just gone. And that's not something that I want as well. There's just so many issues.
00:39:53
Speaker
With this, it's not safe for me to be in a cab or on transit with people I don't know when I'm extremely out of it. I ended up arriving at 6.45 that evening to take my dose, even though that was way too early and they sent me away because 6.45 is the cutoff time. I arrived 10 seconds after that. And you know, sometimes there's traffic. So what if I'm in a taxi and I don't end up getting there until 6.45 due to rush hour traffic?
00:40:21
Speaker
I have not missed a dose for two years, except for that. The last time that I didn't have access to my medication, I was going on a business trip to Edmonton and I wasn't able to get carries. I tried to pick it up at the pharmacy. I couldn't get it. I ended up getting street drugs and I ended up overdosing. I wasn't able to speak at the event that I wanted to because of that.
00:40:48
Speaker
Like the last time I didn't have access to my medication was the last time that I overdosed and ended up in the hospital. And so did you try and get an exemption? Like you were like, Hey, this isn't going to work. This, this is clearly like I, two of my three doses are like when you're not open. Sorry, go ahead.
00:41:07
Speaker
Two of my three doses are like when you're not open, did you go to the powers that be and explain like, hey, can I get an exemption? I am following all the rules. I am doing great. Is it possible for me to get an exemption? Did you ask? What happened when you asked? Yeah, my doctor and I did ask. My doctor actually wrote pages and pages and pages.
00:41:29
Speaker
for the government trying to beg them to give me an exemption to these new regulations. She literally wrote pages on pages. And they didn't care. The reason why you had to take them to court was because they looked at your request and said, go to hell.
00:41:52
Speaker
Pretty much. Yeah. I mean, you know, they're more professional than that, but yeah, they said no. Well, they're always very polite, you know, right as they're trying to kill you, but yeah. Um, and so you ended up connecting with a friend of the, of the show, Avanish Nanda as your lawyer, right? How did that come about?
00:42:12
Speaker
I was very, very lucky that he agreed to represent me. We ended up talking. I explained my case to him. I explained that it's going to be 12 hours on transit.
Significance of Safe Supply in Recovery
00:42:26
Speaker
I explained the issues with the timing. I want to go back to school in the near future so that I can have a career. And if I'm spending 12 hours on transit or four hours in a cab, that's not going to work.
00:42:43
Speaker
As well, another thing, going to the NTS and taking the doses there, it's actually more than double the cost of my current prescription.
00:42:59
Speaker
Oh yeah. I mean, let's not get it twisted. I don't think the government is worried about costs. I mean, they never would have fought your case. Uh, if they were worried about costs, uh, you know, government lawyers, uh, their time is not cheap as well as all of the like bureaucracy involved in fighting your case. Like, um, they decided to say, I can't afford that, like double the cost.
00:43:24
Speaker
Yeah. And they decided to, they'd said no to you. And I think they said no to you for a very clear reason, right? Which is that like, if safe supply works, if even one example of safe supply gets through our system, where it's done on their terms, you know, where they're able to take drugs at home at their own convenience, you know, and it's not like, I understand that they,
00:43:49
Speaker
hate the idea of harm reduction and safe supply so much that they would literally take a 21 or 22 year old to court to say, no, you can't continue your successful drug treatment. But what I can't get around is the sheer indifference to your life and to the harm that it would do to you when you had made every possible effort to follow the rules that had existed prior to them just arbitrarily saying, you got to do it this way now because diversion.
00:44:18
Speaker
and your drugs might end up on the street, and it's like... We're dying. That's the thing too. Hydromorphone is much weaker than fentanyl. A lot of people who are prescribed hydromorphone, according to my doctor, they take 250, 500 milligrams per day. I take 48.
00:44:45
Speaker
Even if like, even if I wanted to divert, which I don't, I have never ever shared my medication. I need every single milligram that I am prescribed. But even so, hydromorphone has a very, very low street value. If someone who was addicted to fentanyl took the entire 48 milligrams that I am prescribed, they wouldn't feel anything.
00:45:14
Speaker
And more importantly, I need every single milligram that I am prescribed. I don't have any leftover. I need all of it. I'm willing to take drug tests more often. I'd be willing to take a drug test every week to prove that I'm not taking anything else, that I'm only taking what I'm supposed to, that I'm not diverting it. Like, you know, you're still taking regular piss tests right now though, aren't you?
00:45:38
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah, I am just to prove that you're not worried that to prove to the government and to the doctors and to everyone involved that you're not using streets or as opioids that you're only using your prescription. Like they're already heavy. You're already on heavy restrictions. Like it is not like the government just hands you a bottle of pills and says, go nuts. Right.
00:45:58
Speaker
Exactly. I had to work so hard to get this prescription. And as well, I'm not on insurance. Insurance does not pay for my medication. The government does not pay for my medication. Tax dollars do not pay for my medication.
00:46:14
Speaker
I already take frequent drug tests and I'm willing to take more frequent drug tests. With most prescriptions, you know, people go to the pharmacy like once every two weeks, they pick up two weeks worth and then that's it. I go to the pharmacy every single day.
00:46:33
Speaker
I never have like a week's worth of medication on me, ever. I go to the pharmacy every day and I'm fine with that. That is totally fine with me. I understand why. I agree that there should be heavy restrictions, but like I never have very much. I go to the pharmacy every day and that's fine. But this government is so ideologically opposed to the idea of safe supply.
00:47:00
Speaker
that they would rather put you, Ophelia, in harm's way. They would rather you die than give you access to non-poison drugs, which, again, blows my mind.
Plans for Blogging and Advocacy
00:47:15
Speaker
Yeah. And that is the state of politics in Alberta right now. That is the Alberta model in action. And sometimes it honestly feels to me that it really feels like to the government, I'm not a person, I'm politics.
00:47:32
Speaker
And that's absolutely terrifying because I am a person. And this education works for me. It works for me very, very well. Doctors admit that it works for me. My favorite person who's a nurse, he's very, very proud of how well I'm doing. Like, you know, everyone admits that it works for me.
00:48:00
Speaker
And there's a section from the judge's decision that I want to read aloud, because I think it's important to just be like this, what this judge said matters. Quote, Mrs. Miss Black's interest in avoiding death or serious harm is not just self-interest. Canadian society has a public interest in the well-being of its members.
00:48:21
Speaker
Indeed, the inviolability of life is a fundamental value in Canadian society, and legislation or state action that has the effect of jeopardizing the right to life is not easily justified. The public interest favors preventing Ms. Black and anyone similarly situated from being exposed to the real risk of death that would result from the operation of the relevant provisions of the regulation and the standards.
00:48:45
Speaker
Ms. Black also contends that an injunction that would keep her and those similarly situated from consuming illicit drugs in the streets is consistent with the objective of promoting public safety.
00:48:57
Speaker
Like the judge just said, like your regular, your government regulations are very likely to kill or seriously harm a 22 year old woman. And the government is standing up in court saying, yes, I would like to continue with the things that are going to either kill or seriously harm this 22 year old woman. It is, it is boggling to me that those people wake up in the morning and feel that that is acceptable.
00:49:20
Speaker
Yeah, I don't want to go back to how I used to be. The thought absolutely terrifies me because I've, I've made such strides in such changes and I just, I want to keep making those positive changes. And so how did you feel when you learned about the judge's decision to give you this exemption? It felt like a weight being lifted off my shoulders. I felt like I could properly breathe for the first time since October.
00:49:55
Speaker
I felt so relieved. I felt so happy. But this is just a temporary injunction, right? What's the status of the case right now? Well, there needs to be a hearing for a more permanent decision.
00:50:17
Speaker
Um, in regards to the prescription. So that's, that's what's next. Um, the government of Alberta could steal appeal as well from my understanding. I really hope that they won't because like, you know, this is a temporary decision. It's not, it's not the overall decision or anything like that. This is just temporary. Um, I really hope that they won't appeal.
00:50:46
Speaker
but I don't know what their plan is. Honestly, I kind of wish that I could talk to some of them, just let them meet me, let them see that I'm a person, that I'm not hurting anyone, and that I just don't want to hurt myself. Yeah.
00:51:12
Speaker
I think it's what you've done is already extraordinary in both telling your story and going to court and beating the government and showing the arbitrary capricious and like
00:51:23
Speaker
literally deadly decisions that the government makes with regards to its, uh, its drug poisoning crisis policy. Like you are an important symbol of like how safe supply could work. And the government is so against that, that they would rather put you in harm's way than see you be, have a successful life. And that is just, I am one person.
00:51:50
Speaker
I am one person who just wants to live. And I've been on this prescription for two years now. I've been on this prescription for two years. I've never overdosed on my medication. I take every single milligram that I am prescribed no more, no less.
00:52:09
Speaker
I have not had a dose increase for a year and when I was offered a dose increase, I turned it down. I've never had a single infection. I've never had any health issues from this prescription. I am in excellent health.
00:52:25
Speaker
Even with NORS, because I call NORS every single time I take a dose, one of the things that I think is indicative of how well I'm doing, whenever a new operator has been trained to work for NORS... Oh, can you just explain to the folks who might not know what NORS is, what NORS is? Sure. Yeah, so NORS is basically a phone line.
00:52:52
Speaker
And the way it works is that when you're going to be taking any substances, you call them, you give them your address, and then you take the substances while you are on the phone with them. So then that way, if you have an overdose, if you have any kind of issue, they can dispatch paramedics to your location.
00:53:19
Speaker
So it's basically just like a safety net to keep you safe. And every single time that I take a dose, I always call NORS. I'm actually, I know everyone who works there very, very well. I consider them like family to me. But whenever a new operator is trained to work with NORS,
00:53:46
Speaker
They always make sure that I am the first call that that new operator will get because they know that I'm not going to overdose. They know that I'm safe. And by giving the new operator me as their first call, it's kind of a way for them to like, you know, dip their toes in the water, have that first call, but not need to worry about like dispatching paramedics the first time or anything like that.
00:54:16
Speaker
because they know that I'm not going to overdose because they know that I'm safe. Yeah, you're just super solid. You've done it hundreds of times now and I've never had a problem. Thousands. Thousands, yeah.
00:54:32
Speaker
fascinating little insight into, you know, the system working. And even the fact that I had so many people who were willing to testify on my behalf, like we didn't even use all the testimonies that I was offered because there were like 25 people who all said like, I want to testify for you.
00:54:58
Speaker
Ewan, he's also a very important people in harm reduction, very important person in harm reduction. Ewan Thompson with Each and Every, yep. Yes, exactly. He has suggested that I start a blog on Substack. So if anyone's curious, if anyone has any questions for me, or if anyone wants to read about the lawsuit, read about
00:55:24
Speaker
harm reduction, things like that. I will be starting a blog on Substack and I can answer questions and whatnot there. As well, I also just want to say to everyone who's listening, I know that my prescription is very, very unorthodox. I know that
00:55:45
Speaker
Everyone is going to have opinions on whether I should be allowed to continue or not, but I just want to say to everyone who's listening, thank you so much for being open-minded, for giving me a chance. I really, really appreciate that.
00:56:04
Speaker
No matter what your opinions are, the fact that you listened to this, the fact that you gave me a chance, the fact that you heard what I had to say, that means so much to me. So thank you so much for that. Yeah, I'm so glad that you were able to come up. Absolutely. When the link to that substat, when that substat is live, please send the link our way and we'll obviously we'll push it out on our socials.
00:56:32
Speaker
I will. Thank you. Thanks so much for coming on. Look forward to reading your sub-stack. That's all for now.