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Episode 14: Embracing Love Through Venus Retrograde: Healing Relationship Patterns
32 Plays1 year ago
In this episode of Sacred Self-Love, we explore the powerful lessons of Venus Retrograde and how it invites us to heal deep-seated patterns in our relationships. I share a personal experience with my husband where I made the conscious choice to lean into love rather than old fears or defenses. Venus Retrograde is not here to break us—it’s here to guide us toward greater self-awareness, deeper connection, and true heart healing. Tune in as we reflect on how this cosmic shift offers us the opportunity to rewrite our love stories with more grace, compassion, and authenticity. 💖✨ #SacredSelfLove #VenusRetrograde #HealingThroughLove
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Transcript
Introduction to Love and Venus Retrograde
00:00:06
Valerie Vazquez
Aloha, welcome to Sacred Self-Love. I'm your host and guide Valerie Vasquez. Thank you so much for tuning in today. i'm going to talk about love and the Venus retrograde some on this recording today on this episode and just wanted to You know, if you've been following me for some time, you know that I give some farm updates.
Life on a Hawaiian Farm
00:00:33
Valerie Vazquez
For those of you who may be new to the podcast, I do live on the big island of Hawaii, and we have a 10-acre farm that we steward. And we have lots of animals. We have cows and chickens and sheep and ducks and dogs and cats and rabbit and um and lots of plants and trees and herbs. And so we steward a lot and we really feel very grateful for being here. it has helped us along our healing journeys so much to be able to truly connect into the land and
00:01:13
Valerie Vazquez
to be able to learn how to slow down and go at her pace. And um yesterday, we actually had one of our chickens die. And it's, it's never easy, because we really do put a lot of love and care into raising all of our our birds and our animals.
00:01:38
Valerie Vazquez
And so yeah, I just wanted to share that we you know, we do eat animals. We haven't really processed any animals yet on our farm, but we will be in the future with some of the ah lambs, the sheep.
00:01:58
Valerie Vazquez
That is um our plan in the future. And we haven't yet gotten meat birds, but I'm just telling you all that because when we do have an animal or a bird that passes, we actually do bury them in the land, we give them back to the land.
Cycles of Life and Venus Retrograde
00:02:21
Valerie Vazquez
so we essentially plant them and then we put a new tree or a type of plant over them in the area where we bury them so that a new life will emerge and so as they are going back into the earth as their body is decomposing it can give the life force energy back into that new plant and so we planted her
00:02:53
Valerie Vazquez
Yesterday in over close to the garden and we put a new lily koi vine and we put flowers and we just honor the energy and the life because we really truly are so grateful for every single animal or bird that comes onto our land and helps to take care of it as we take care of them.
00:03:19
Valerie Vazquez
and so I'm Yeah, it's it really is a beautiful process, both birth, death, rebirth. All of it is the natural cycles of life.
00:03:33
Valerie Vazquez
And when we try to like hold on to that so much, that's when it makes it really hard. But but as you've if you've listened to other episodes, I've talked about this before. It's been one of the biggest...
00:03:48
Valerie Vazquez
lessons and the biggest things that we have really faced here and on the four years that we've been on the farm is when you take care of this many types of lives you know you're going to see them pass just like the amount of wild birds that come onto the land the the mice the rats that the cats get some time it's like you really truly get to see what the actual birth and death cycle is like. And it's, it's, um it becomes a beautiful thing. ah
00:04:23
Valerie Vazquez
Like I said, it's never easy, but ah you become face to face with it.
Rose Priestess Training and Healing
00:04:29
Valerie Vazquez
Whereas when we used to live in a city, you didn't see it as much and so it is just a process we really honor so yeah thank you again for joining me i just wanted to this is probably going to be a short episode today but I wanted to talk a little bit about the Venus retrograde and some of the things that I've already like witnessed happen within my life and relationship
00:04:58
Valerie Vazquez
As well as I am really excited that on Wednesday, I'm actually going into a one-year training um for a Rose Priestess Mystery School.
00:05:15
Valerie Vazquez
And I've really come to to understand that for me as a Sagittarius, I am such a truth seeker and i love learning. And I also love experiencing and going deeper into this healing process and just how extremely sacred and multifaceted it really, really is You know, in the beginning, we just sometimes don't know how deep this healing goes, like through our ancestry.
00:05:47
Valerie Vazquez
We are healing seven generations behind us and seven generations in front of us. So it is so deep. And I was really just, you know, blown away by the synchronicity of, I have a few rose bushes. And the day that Venus went into retrograde, the roses started blooming.
00:06:13
Valerie Vazquez
The um Venusian cycle actually is this eight-year cycle. I'm still learning, but During that eight years, it forms a five-petaled rose in the sky, a pattern.
00:06:27
Valerie Vazquez
And so, um and right now with Venus going into retrograde, basically she has descended down and it's the story of Inanna descending down into the underworld.
Venus Retrograde and Relationship Introspection
00:06:39
Valerie Vazquez
And during that time, shedding layers and coming back up after this retrograde, which this one is 43 days. Usually it's 40 days. And that's a really significant number.
00:06:53
Valerie Vazquez
But after, mean, during this retrograde, it is really time two have introspection and be okay with going down into the dark.
00:07:04
Valerie Vazquez
And it is Venus is the planet of love. So it has to do with your relationships. And so you might have things coming up right now, like a lot within your relationships.
00:07:18
Valerie Vazquez
And see, the the thing about healing is that if we don't heal certain patterns, even if they're, you know, in other relationships, they're going to continue to repeat.
00:07:31
Valerie Vazquez
And same thing, I mean, whether or not you're single, or if you're married, they're just these patterns are just going to repeat over and over again, the cycle of like this trauma drama, and this like triggering is going to just keep repeating until you look at your part in it. So um I wanted to tell a little bit of a story of how Chad and i there was something that came up and um how we got through it.
00:08:00
Valerie Vazquez
Both of us doing the work, we're doing the work differently. And of course, that's okay. But we're able to have conversations now that we once weren't before. So here's the scenario. Okay.
00:08:14
Valerie Vazquez
We, in the morning, we do different self-care practices. And yesterday we both decided that we were going to do the sauna and the cold plunge. And we usually, if we go in the sauna, we'll do breath work in the sauna and then go in the cold prime cold plunge.
00:08:30
Valerie Vazquez
And just side note real quick, ladies, the cold plunge is not something you want to do. all the time you really need to see where you are in your cycle because our wombs are meant to stay warm so you know check into that it's not we're not men so we don't want to cold plunge all the time but I'm in a part where it's okay right off the side note so I went into the sauna and i did my breath work and i I thought that he had already done the cold plunge. So I got out, got into the cold plunge, and he was in the sauna doing his breath work. I was in the cold plunge.
00:09:10
Valerie Vazquez
And when I got out, I was like, I'm just going to put the lid on and go in the house, shower, you know. but as I was putting the lid I start hearing him knocking, at I think, or i I'm hearing knocking, and I don't know what it is, then it just gets really loud, and I look over, it and he looks like he's, like, aggressively knocking on the sauna, and I just was, like, uh, okay, and so, like, I kind of gave him, like, a, like, a look, like, okay, like,
00:09:42
Valerie Vazquez
whatever. And i just walk inside and immediately my ego starts going, what the hell? Like he's in there doing breath work and he's knocking aggressively on the door at me instead of doing his breath work. Like that's not even how you like, what is even like, you know, you're that inner voice starts going off because you're triggered in that moment.
00:10:07
Valerie Vazquez
And you know, really what I know I was feeling is my inner child felt like she was being reprimanded for doing something wrong. And So she was like not feeling safe in that moment.
00:10:22
Valerie Vazquez
So I got in the shower and I really literally wanted to lock the doors at the bathroom. I wanted to like hide and retreat and then like not talk to him. We had planned on going on a walk down to the to the ocean.
00:10:36
Valerie Vazquez
And I was like, I'm not going to go walking with him. And like all this happened within a span of like, and don't know, four to five minutes, all these things just in my head in the shower.
Choosing Love Over Ego
00:10:45
Valerie Vazquez
And then I went, boom.
00:10:47
Valerie Vazquez
Valerie, you literally just, okay, you just did breath work in sauna yourself. Okay, did, are you like, are you in your body right now? Are you safe? Are you okay?
00:11:04
Valerie Vazquez
Yes. Are you a little girl that got reprimanded by your parent right now? No. Was that maybe a little something that maybe he didn't necessarily have to do? Yeah.
00:11:19
Valerie Vazquez
Are you literally causing disruption to your cortisol levels right now by being upset with him? Yes. Are you going to punish him for this all day and literally...
00:11:31
Valerie Vazquez
in close your heart off to love are you are you going to choose that for the day for the whole sunday together are you going to choose to close your heart off because he banged on the glass and now you're going to punish him And so obviously ah chose, no, I'm going to keep my heart open.
00:11:51
Valerie Vazquez
And that is the thing in the healing journey that is one of like, it is no one of the hardest things to do in a relationship is to keep your heart open and lean in when you feel like you have, you know, when you've gotten triggered But I just, I was like, I'm going to choose love because if I choose love, I'm going to settle my system down. I'm going to go outside and still love him and be able to talk to him in a calm voice and let him know what came up for me. And I'm not going to try to like tell him he was wrong in the situation.
00:12:33
Valerie Vazquez
yeah. I got out of the shower. i came out. He had already showered and everything. And I was like, hey, could, you know, could we talk? And he said, yeah. And I just said, I'm choosing to keep my heart open and this moment with you.
00:12:51
Valerie Vazquez
I was very triggered that you banged on the door at me when I was trying to put the lid on the cold plunge because I thought you had already done it. And in that moment, I felt very controlled and very like reprimanded, reprimanded. And I wanted to close my heart off and I wanted to punish you for making me feel that way.
00:13:13
Valerie Vazquez
And he was like, um he's like, I love you. i am sorry. i will take accountability that that wasn't something I needed to do. ah didn't need you I could have, you know, let you put the lid on and i could have taken it off again.
00:13:30
Valerie Vazquez
But I also didn't want you to have to lift up the heavy lid unless it was necessary. And so see, you can see both realities. We both had a reality.
00:13:43
Valerie Vazquez
He was trying to not have me have to pick up something heavy, which I will be honest, it is an awkward lid and I actually ended up... hitting my shin on it. So yeah, so he didn't want me to have to do that unnecessary thing.
00:14:01
Valerie Vazquez
But then on my end, I saw that he was trying to control me. And so you can see within a relationship, there's always going to be two different realities happening.
00:14:13
Valerie Vazquez
And when we get triggered, we get pulled into the past. And we projected onto that current moment. And then we can basically close our hearts off and not try to find out what really is the reality of our partner if we close our hearts off.
00:14:33
Valerie Vazquez
If we allow that, you know, subconscious programming to take over and to remove love from our heart and to just like punish them or to close off from them and not want to spend time with them.
00:14:48
Valerie Vazquez
And so these are the kinds of things, these are the kind, this is just an example of a pattern that that can come up during this Venus retrograde in a relationship.
Patterns in Love and Gratitude to Listeners
00:14:59
Valerie Vazquez
You know, these things can come up right now and you get to choose while you're on this healing journey to look at your part. I could have literally just blamed him and been like, that was just so rude of you to like bang on the door like that. And I could have been mad at him all day. And it could have just been like an awful day between us.
00:15:20
Valerie Vazquez
And it would be awful for both of us. So yeah, we can look at these things and we can choose to soften in the way of not wanting to close your heart off to love, but actually lean into love.
00:15:35
Valerie Vazquez
which we all really want to be loved, I believe, I know, and we all really are love in its purest form. And so when we can look at that within ourselves, we can help heal ourselves, but we can help heal our partners too.
00:15:52
Valerie Vazquez
i mean, me punishing him and closing off to love and it being conditional, um that's something that he could have experienced as as a child. And that, you know, it's just, this it's not a good feeling. So, yeah. And um so ah just really wanted to share that today. And again, I'm very grateful for all of you that, you know, support me on this podcast and reach out to me and let me know that you've listened and that it is helpful.
00:16:28
Valerie Vazquez
And, you know, if you want to share, i am dabbling back on a little bit more social media. I had some introspection with that as well.
00:16:39
Valerie Vazquez
You know, I really feel like i my mission here has become very, very clear to me. Every time I derail from it, I feel like I'm not in alignment.
00:16:50
Valerie Vazquez
And so I do want to share to show other women that it is possible to heal. It is possible to come back and find your power again and your truth and the, ah you know, your authentic self.
00:17:04
Valerie Vazquez
And so I know that I've struggled with um just the whole thing with social media of like, well, I don't have that many followers. I'm not making that much of an impact. Well, guess what? Ego, you don't need to have a lot of followers to make an impact.
00:17:21
Valerie Vazquez
You know, so I had to look at that within myself. Like what is really important? What's really important is to be a light during this time, especially during this current, you know,
00:17:34
Valerie Vazquez
reality like this timeline i've I've said this before it's it's very volatile right now and um there's just especially if you are and American if you're you know Everything is like this division going on, this separation going on, and there's a lot of pain.
The Importance of Personal Healing and Self-Care
00:17:54
Valerie Vazquez
There's a lot of confusion. And um yeah, I mean, I'm feeling it too.
00:18:00
Valerie Vazquez
I just know that what we focus on you know, expands. And I think the best thing that we can focus on right now is our own healing and our own power, because the more that we can...
00:18:15
Valerie Vazquez
acknowledge yes that we're feeling anger that we're feeling grief that we're feeling all these different feelings because of what's going on and release those out I believe we come become more clear how we can help make a change because We rely too much on others to make changes, and that isn't really where true change is going to happen.
00:18:40
Valerie Vazquez
We are much more powerful than we give ourselves credit for, but it is coming back to the truth of who we are, and it is clearing out these patterns and programs and that separate us from love.
00:18:55
Valerie Vazquez
And um so, yeah, I hope you have a wonderful rest of the week. Be gentle with yourself. Take time. Remember your sacredness.
00:19:07
Valerie Vazquez
Remember how important it is to take care of yourself. to regulate your nervous system, to get in coherence with the heartbeat Mother Earth, to slow down, to get into nature if you can, if you can't because it's cold where you are.
00:19:29
Valerie Vazquez
Listen to nature sounds. Just just um allow yourself to get out of the survival mode to really reconnect back in and give yourself so much grace, so much compassion, and especially to those around you as well.
00:19:48
Valerie Vazquez
If you haven't subscribed yet, please hit subscribe. Please give me a five-star rating. Leave me a comment to let me know you listened or reached out, reach out over social media. TikTok or Instagram is really where I'm at right now again.
00:20:03
Valerie Vazquez
And um yeah, just sending you so much love and until next time, aloha.