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00:00:01
Cute Boy Next Door Is Also A POS
19 Plays7 days ago
Jake returns for a middle age check up.
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Transcript
Jake's Past and Friend Zone
00:00:14
Speaker
Yeah. Cipher sore eyes, man. Yeah, look at this guy, so hot. Back in the day, the girls would say, boy next door, kind of guy I can take advantage of, nice guy, cute.
00:00:28
Speaker
I can probably tell him to go down on me, whatever it takes. That's Jake, he's back, people. Why didn't you tell me that back then? Like, hey, clue me in. you know Back then, I just didn't just like, I don't know what the hell is going on. don't think you didn't know?
00:00:45
Speaker
No, I was completely oblivious to any of that stuff. No, I put you on a pedestal. I thought i didn't have a chance. ah You guys are crazy. You guys are football players and all that stuff. like I was just like more naturally friends with like females, but in the friend zone all the time.
00:01:03
Speaker
you know Yeah. The dreaded friend zone. A little metro sexual vibe. Yeah, you know, very safe. Like, oh, he's nice. Yeah. yeah You think Jake had a metro sexual vibe?
00:01:15
Speaker
That's fine. No, not really.
Unchanging Core and Life Reflection
00:01:17
Speaker
He did not actually, but his- Did he even exist back then? A metrosexual? I don't think he did. You're ahead of your time, dude. No, he was a so simple guy from a fashion standpoint. but i like them I wish I could have said, that would be great if we had a ton of stories of girls that just focused on how they how he could, I would like him to go down on me.
00:01:36
Speaker
We just kept hearing that over over and over again. Well, he he is the kind of guy that the girl could say, do it like this. I got it. I think he pounds, dude.
00:01:48
Speaker
Yeah, I think he rails. I think we all we all know. I think anybody in that generation knows that all the girls thought Jake was hot. That's just what it is. top Probably top five, top ten.
00:02:01
Speaker
Wow. You know, you guys are showering me with a lot of love here. I love it. And yes, I would, I've probably, you know I'd probably be considered a very considerate person. So I guess there you go. Considerate. Oh, that's so great, dude. Considerate and the hotness. Like, I hope every everyone your life knows how lucky they are, you know?
00:02:21
Speaker
Yeah, I guess. I don't know. I brought it up because you've you've carried it through tonight. Like you didn't, I'm sure there's people we could have on the show we'd be like, you're unrecognizable. Like you you are the name of our show because you've let yourself go at that level. But you look look almost exact same.
00:02:40
Speaker
Well, you know, it's good, I guess. What, like for sophomore year, high school, junior, senior? Is that what we're talking? Yeah. um I just want to do this because if we have women on, we're always like, you look young, but we never we never say shit to the men.
00:02:53
Speaker
So we should. Oh, okay. That's true. In this new era. Yes, indeed. good Congratulations, Jake. I'll i'll leave it ah i'll leave it at that. yeah Hey, you know, I mean, and I'm not just throwing it back there, fellas, but no, we all look good. well i'm sure I'm cheating because I left the country.
00:03:09
Speaker
Dropped 10 years just by getting out of the U.S. I'll have you know, though, yeah Jake, I'm still a hothead, bro. Still still a dick. Well, I mean, at your core, right? Yeah.
00:03:19
Speaker
You don't like leave your core behind. true. It's true. I'm temperamental, get enraged. I didn't want you to feel comfortable like I have changed. I want you to know that I might turn on you in this episode.
00:03:32
Speaker
I think the comfort level is that we all know each other, right? It's pretty cool. Like we can get back on this kind of thing and just, you know, I kind of get what to expect, even though, you know, I got to listen to...
00:03:44
Speaker
a lot of your shows, right? So I kind of have an update of where where we are now, but it's generally the same as to when we were talking back in the day and all that, you know, in high school and even after it, the band stuff. So, I mean, what you can expect from me is probably about the same thing I expect from you guys.
Matt's Minimalism and Social Dynamics
00:04:00
Speaker
Yeah. It's crazy. Yeah. Picks up very easily, easy with you. Mm hmm. For sure. but Matt, what are you doing? You've been in St. Louis. Let's let's get our many listeners an update, dude, because you're in a weird apartment.
00:04:15
Speaker
What the fuck are you doing? It's so funny, dude. I feel like I'm know the show is a little bit about the nonsense of middle age, but i but I am always I feel pretty good right now. I mentioned it.
00:04:25
Speaker
I'm trying to get this business going. I'm happy where I'm at with my kids. But i'm I'm always in these situations where like I really should question any, like in my life. I'm in an empty ah apartment right now, sleeping on an air mattress that I bought at just the most shitty Walmart in the world.
00:04:43
Speaker
and But I'm like, things are going well. Not really. Not for most 48 year olds, but one of my, one of my c the co-owners of my company, he he rented this apartment, but he just bought a house, so he moved out.
00:04:56
Speaker
And so I thought I gonna stay here with all the shit in it, but he had to move pretty quick, and so it's empty, but I didn't wanna, you know, I could stay here, pay for a hotel for almost three weeks, save us about two grand.
00:05:08
Speaker
So I got an air mattress and i'm sitting on the, sleeping on the floor. hey yeah that's exciting dude it's exciting yeah i mean it's so sad but i love the isolation so i love it like every night i'm like i don't got shit to do kids aren't here i'm zero friends ah i'm just sitting on the air mattress like having a ball i mean i don't want don't take that the wrong way but yeah you have wi-fi man yeah i wi-fi Okay, well, that's all you need. It's day society. I'm not using it how you guys are probably thinking that I'm using it. but i'm so Well, I didn't say anything.
00:05:45
Speaker
but But there's part excitement and part like, what what the fuck? Yeah? Yeah. well So we have we pack we have a few events because everybody no one knows about us yet still. So we're now we we got all this shit up here. We we want people to know that we exist. We have ah an event.
00:06:00
Speaker
One of my friends owns an awesome bar here and in a cool neighborhood in St. Louis. So we're doing an event tomorrow and we invited a bunch of interior designers and friends and other people that might be interested in our slabs and all our are wood products. so So we've been, actually it's a 109 degree heat and index thing. We've been carrying all this heavy wood up to the second floor bar.
00:06:21
Speaker
Just rippling, dude. Sweaty and rippling. No, I mean, talk about hot. du yeah I mean, wow. I know. wow I was like doing heavy. breathing every time like a young WashU girl or somebody walked by. Dude.
00:06:34
Speaker
du Yeah, yeah. The c sisters probably from St. Louis, the c sisters of St. Louis probably want to hit that. there's boy there Yeah, no no doubt. no Yeah, yeah, like sweating, carrying wood.
00:06:47
Speaker
Unbelievable. Yeah, it's there is there is, I don't know what it is. and don't know why like on the other side of this bar, I think it might be like, I don't know what it is, but every like 15 minutes, like 15 beautiful yeah black ladies will walk by and they're dressed in all black and they're like going upstairs. And I don't know why you there is like some Paul Mitchell studio or something up there, like a school. And I'm like, I guess they're all going and learn how to do hair.
00:07:16
Speaker
yeah Yeah. Beauty school or something. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe, I don't know, but it's, it's like they're busting them in. It's like, I'm like, here we go again. I'm like, we're carrying on those.
Living on the Edge and Wildlife Challenges
00:07:23
Speaker
What and it's like, here comes another line of these. cute, cute black women swa good with dressed in all black and going upstairs and looking at us like dumb white boys in the right. Yeah. Hey, like you got to get them to your event, you know?
00:07:38
Speaker
Dude, I was just about to say something like, oh, this is what we need, some strong women to help us, like a joke. And then my partner said something stupid and like cut me off. And and then i I got shy.
00:07:49
Speaker
Wow. ah You got shot. This is great. This is guy stuff, fellas. Chicks, black women, talking about Jake going down. i like it.
00:08:01
Speaker
Well, I just say the... what to stemming off the conversation we had pre-show, I like every moment in my life now is on the, it's like right on the edge of like complete loser disaster and some success where it's just like, if you did the math, you'd be like, you fucking, what a loser, dude.
00:08:21
Speaker
You're a loser. and Hey, so, depends on how you feel about yourself though, right? So I feel great, but I feel like I'm giving myself extra, like I shouldn't. Like if you just add up like the the apartment I live in, the bank account,
00:08:38
Speaker
what's going on here, it looks bad on paper, but I but i feel pretty happy right now. Okay, but we're gonna get to Jake, but dude, I'm on the roof today in a burning rooftop trying to spray raccoons under my solar panels with the hose.
00:08:54
Speaker
that's That's a fucking loser. Those things are nasty. They're little fucks, but there are just a whole host of things that make you feel like a loser. Not just your business and black women that won't bang you.
00:09:06
Speaker
But no, that's not true. did You said you got shy already. No, I'm just saying that I think they would. They'll never get the they'll never get the opportunity because i'm not going to make the the move. But i I think they would.
00:09:21
Speaker
But do you you come across this raccoon situation? Are you now? You were talking about you still have rage issues. Are you just like, I'll figure it out because I've been through so much shit. Are you like, fuck, raccoons, what?
00:09:33
Speaker
Don't you feel like a little more relaxed about this shit now than maybe like 15 years ago? Yes, I do. Yes, I am older. I do get enraged by what is inevitably a two to five grand cost.
00:09:47
Speaker
And this comes out at $3,200. thirty two hundred it's just and It's just unbelievable. And i am like that i kind of rage about because it's like... Three grand. So you immediately start thinking about the bucket where you got to pull it from. Right. And you're like, all right, I got to move this to that. I got to do the Dewey Decimal System and these fucking raccoons. Well, it's this bullshit it's the knowledge that I know that any issue like this is going to be, I have this like hope that it's going to be about 400 bucks, but I know deep down it's always 2,500 more.
00:10:21
Speaker
whether it's a plumbing thing or you know whatever and and of course i'm like okay this guy's gonna be like 600 and we get to go no 3200 well you know so i had that pigeon like back in arizona i had pigeons in the solar panels and same deal you know because you can't just blast them out in there you gotta get the whole And they shit all over the place. They scratch shit up. They're little fuckers, man.
00:10:50
Speaker
You're whipping rocks at your own house. You're like, why the fuck am I throwing rocks at my own house?
Jake's Seattle Life and Team Management
00:10:54
Speaker
Why solar panel? Why they attract animals? It seems like it'd be hot as fuck. Well, they're just looking for, they look for a place to nest.
00:11:00
Speaker
Yeah. Same with the raccoons. Because they sit like four inches off the roof, three, four inches off the roof. So it's a nice covered place. Dude, a solar panel in Phoenix, or heres that you guys live in Phoenix, right?
00:11:13
Speaker
Solar Pen in Phoenix seems like you'd fry, even if you're underneath it. I don't get i don't get how a raccoon can handle it here. But what's ironic about is you try to do the good thing as as a liberal.
00:11:27
Speaker
And you know you know not a lot of people have solar in Colorado. Well, it's more popular, but Phoenix all over. Try to do the good thing, and then the raccoons fuck you. They get fucked all the same jokes, right? Yeah.
00:11:39
Speaker
Yeah. Hey, raccoons don't care, man. they know They're just doing their thing. They're doing it. There were some raccoons in Boulder that were like Great Danes. Like enormous.
00:11:49
Speaker
like ah that lived there that I remember you like at night you'd see me and be like, what is that, a bear? like That's scary. It's probably the garbage. College garbage. Yeah, all those hippies.
00:12:00
Speaker
Dirty. Dirty. But you'll be wearing hippies leaving their shit everywhere. Right. Right. So Jake, how are you, man? You're still in Seattle, eh?
00:12:11
Speaker
Yep, still in Seattle. um What's changed? Let's see. No, not much as far as where we live. We're in Seattle. We're Acclimated completely. I think we talked a lot about the weather the last time, but yeah at least one of the times. So we're acclimated to that.
00:12:29
Speaker
Summer's here, super nice. We get a lot of visitors in the summer um because people that we know and love are like from Phoenix, right? So they visit us because it's hot as shit. Yeah, so yeah, yeah. So moved on to a different gig, but generally the same. Life is good, man. What are we, about a year out when you you did the but Beloved music show?
00:12:50
Speaker
I think that similar. hey, listen. Is that about a year ago? Yeah. I didn't realize so many people are going to get pissed off that I thought that the black-eyed peas were some sort of a cultural shift. It says me. But apparently they Apparently they do. Like, hey, that's cool, though. Yeah, man. I mean, that's why it's a hot take.
00:13:06
Speaker
Not everybody agrees with Right. Maybe. I don't know. nice It was a hot take. But you're on the road now. This is the job where you're on the road doing sales and stuff little bit? Yeah, I'm on the road. Nice. I'm on the road. I travel around Washington a lot. It's been good. It was a big shift from moving until like last year, July and right before COVID, like March 20, 2020.
00:13:31
Speaker
twenty twenty before I went to spring break March 2020, not to get on the whole COVID thing, but I'll never forget. Went to spring break, came back. They're like, don't come to the office. And COVID started, I hadn't really worked in a building until last July.
00:13:45
Speaker
It's all been work from home. It's been crazy. yeah So that kind of social social dynamic in business and or even the rest of the world, and we've probably covered it agnosium, but pretty nuts.
00:13:57
Speaker
Pretty nuts. But it's good to be out for sure. Yeah. what are you What are your common worries of the job? like What do you do? like like What are you like, oh, shit, I got deal with this fucking guy? Or, oh, man, I better sell this? like what's your What are your pressures?
00:14:12
Speaker
Pressure is for my job. like so What I do is operation stuff. so It's really just people yeah and keeping teams together. Teams are super fragile. And it just takes one thing here, one thing there, people get irritated or something said wrong or something.
00:14:28
Speaker
um It's usually not the actual work being done. It's the the interplay of people on teams and keeping them together and keeping them kind of moving in the same direction. It's pretty tough.
00:14:39
Speaker
Yeah. So you're managing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For sure. Doing those. Okay. So yeah, that's annoying. but Yeah, that can be ah that can be hard. It's definitely hard for sure. um It takes a lot of patience. That's hard. Patience is freaking hard sometimes, man.
00:14:53
Speaker
Now, do you you seem like a guy as a manager that would offer up some life wisdom. Do you do that you do a lot of mentoring? uh i try to get i i really like to add insight when i can yeah totally i like that stuff um but i don't just throw it up on people you know what i mean or speed i mean we talked about my whole uh you know just moving away from alcohol a couple of calls ago i don't i don't uh i don't like go hey guess what found this new thing. It's unbelievable. You know, like I'm not that kind of dude, but if you ask me, I'll tell you. kind of you're You're like, you know what?
Creative Pursuits and Success Reflections
00:15:27
Speaker
A way you could get ahead there, Sally, is if you push your boobs together a little bit and then unbutton that button.
00:15:34
Speaker
That'll help you here. You do that. Yeah, yeah. no stuff I don't offer up solid advice like that all the time. Right, right. right Well, that's cool. So you're a manager. You're a wise older guy now. do do you Do you feel like an older guy now?
00:15:47
Speaker
Totally. Yeah, perspective is definitely... I thinking about it today actually. ah You could get to that point where, and this probably ties into the whole subject of the podcast. ah Sometimes you feel like a POS when you're just, you get to a point in the life and you start comparing yourself. You to play the comparison game.
00:16:09
Speaker
I don't know how that or how or when that starts, but at some age it starts. It's probably different for everyone, but you start looking at your friends, you look around you, you start to see some like life moments happen and you're like, wow, this person's there, that person's there.
00:16:22
Speaker
and you start to look into it like, but well, you know my decision's here. And you know Matt, you're just kind of talking about it. That's exactly what I'm talking about. You know what I mean? So like um i I've been thinking about that a lot and just working on you know how I feel. What am I going for personally?
00:16:38
Speaker
what makes me happy how do i define success and by the way you guys put on an awesome orion's room show back in the day what is success you guys are like way before your time on that one when you were trying to we were asking the question and what is success you know is it money in the bank account or what is it for you that kind of thing so well weren't you in that i think that's that's definitely something that uh you made it you made it sound like you weren't in that band for a second there I just wanted to give you guys the do because you guys were like the production manager. Are you talking about an actual Orion's Room gig?
00:17:11
Speaker
No, remember when you guys did that at the Gothic where yeah we we did the art and there was this whole thing and then you did the analog, Matt? yeah Yeah, yeah, I was there, but I'm just saying, like, you guys, like, I didn't i showed up and played guitar. No, you didn't, dude. You, like, helped the whole concept, too, bro, so, okay, whatever. I have that, like, blocked out of my head. Lance talked about that, too, but i don't did I just introduce you guys?
00:17:34
Speaker
No, you did, like, we wrote something up and you were talking about... was Was I already doing stand-up? I must have sucked. Yeah. No, no. It was scripted. It was scripted. So it was like with some background music. I've got it on tap i got on video.
00:17:47
Speaker
You were but ahead of your time, though, because it was not quite variety shows, but but ah ah shows that kind of encompass everything that was like kind of in, you know? like You probably were ahead of your time. Yeah. That way. No, it's cool.
00:17:59
Speaker
I just think it was like a perspective thing for me because I was young. We were super young or younger right than we are now. and To be thinking along those lines that early is pretty pretty pretty cool because now, it's pretty I think you get to a point in life where you're just a little bit older and and it's natural to look back a little bit and go, ah you know this, that.
00:18:21
Speaker
Play the comparison game a little bit. So that's definitely something that if you let it, you can feel like a real piece of shit. And I think social media can really make you feel like a piece of shit. We know that, right? If you let it. Well, what are your triggers, Jake? Like, what are the ones where you're like, is it, you know, oh, fuck.
00:18:38
Speaker
and Now I'm feeling worse. Are there specific things? Triggers specifically, probably like... Financial, weight, aging...
00:18:50
Speaker
Relationships. Yeah, I think I think financial is a big one for sure because you know, it's What people can do what people can afford and all that stuff Yeah, but there's always somebody that's gonna make more money There's always somebody that's gonna be bigger better faster all that stuff But it's easy to fall into that trap for sure I can pull you a few numbers buddy off and make you feel good to make you feel good about what's going on so Dude, I must be like a high or something because I really just, I'm not, I'm not like right now, i'm not worried about it.
00:19:26
Speaker
I've never been so broke, but I'd say, um I mean, I guess I'm not, but but like, it's okay. I think maybe not, maybe in like a year, I'll be in a full blown panic, but I don't know. It's just like, I'm not that worried about it.
00:19:41
Speaker
You're in the midst of something new. Yeah, i feel like it's going to work, but it's, I don't know. I've talked about it enough, so i don't feel like keep talking about it, but just feel like I've thought, I've just, in ah in a point in my life where I've kind of really not worried about material things, I kind of have it zeroed down the things I need to take care and what I like, and and that's been like freeing in a way, you know?
Teaching Resilience and Balancing Passions
00:20:03
Speaker
Hell yeah. So I hope I can stay like this. I hope it's not ah just a moment momentary, like, like point of enlightenment that I'll lose and then I'll be worried about if I'm doing enough for my kids if they don't get to do this or that or whatever but uh that's the one thing always brings you back though is like are you providing as much for your kids as everybody else that's the fucking slap oh yeah that's real the trigger I could sleep on this mattress forever dude well that's true um with wi-fi yeah I mean with it so I thought that occurred me the other day like
00:20:37
Speaker
You got super rich entitled kids and you got kids that are like maybe in the middle somewhere and you got kids that are you know on the the lower half. but So what's best? i don't i i don't know to watch but I don't know what's best because I think that one of the keys to life is resilience. And like if you're never practicing resilience, if you're never in struggle at all, then and when you're faced with it, how do you do?
00:21:05
Speaker
So like, but you don't want to be in a certain place where you're never gonna get out of where you're gonna get to. So like, it's an interesting conversation for sure, because my kid doesn't have a lot, but he doesn't have a little, you know, like he's somewhere the middle there. And I think that's good to have to have all that resilience and understand what struggle is. And you can't just have anything and all that kind of stuff.
00:21:28
Speaker
um But at the same time, like see other kids and other other families, they're that'd be pretty cool to just go to Europe for the summer. That'd nice. Oh yeah. Who the fuck's doing that? Well, I actually know some people that are I enlisted my ah kids in San Jose Crips just to get like a little adversity, you know, out there on the street. Oh, that's good. yeah I put them in a gang.
00:21:49
Speaker
So I had the other boys jump them in and everything. So pretty sweet. That's good. We don't want that middle ground. But it almost works the other way. You know, it's like you have this preconceived,
00:22:05
Speaker
like ideas about kids growing up in the hood on the tough for your kid. But then we all we all like sort of look down on the spoiled brat that we see as like rich kid that's got everything they want. But at the same time, they're not all assholes just because their parents like did well. Because you see kids that get get in that situation, they still fail miserably, right? Like life i've just whatever happens. And some kids take advantage of and they turn out to be well-rounded people that had used their resources wisely.
00:22:33
Speaker
So... Yeah, for sure. I think this the pressure to provide for your kids, is it's an obscene thing and in America specifically. but But it's also for you, and maybe even you, Jake, but definitely for me, it's counter to my sensibility. And my sensibility is I can go all in on a band and not make any money.
00:22:54
Speaker
I could do that for decades. I could have done that independent of... you know, not having my soulmate so early in life, if I didn't have that, like I probably would have rode the band train for a lot longer. And I think in all likelihood, had Matt, would have been the same. Jake, I'm not sure about you, but you can tell me now.
Writing and Recovery Insights
00:23:11
Speaker
Tell me now, would you have run with it and sacrificed everything?
00:23:16
Speaker
Well, I can tell you this is that one of the things that I'm always thinking about doing more of is being creative and I don't feel like I get the opportunity to do that kind of in a general day or you know it's so it's like I have to push myself to do it because I got to fit it in and all this kind of stuff so to answer your question if it's just me And we were like, hey, let's do this band thing until you know we we just fall over. We're sleeping on a mattress in St. Louis, whatever.
00:23:44
Speaker
We could do that. yeah Because it's just it's just kind of connecting with who you really are. like If you're really a creative person, and you know maybe society isn't really set up for creative people. That's why you always hear starving artists all the time, right? but you know If you kind of have to do that and and you can just get into it, you got this high all the time because you're just engaged in what you're doing and you're passionate about it and you can just scrape by and do something you love, then great.
00:24:09
Speaker
you know So I probably could do that. Yeah. yeah and If it weren't just me. Is it just music for you? Do you have any other ways to fulfill it? Or is it like play the guitar? Yeah, for me, it's right.
00:24:21
Speaker
Yeah, no, no, it's not just music, but I think music was just an offshoot of just writing. like to write. He's a writer. But a lot of what I've done recently with you know they with a you know kind of moving away from where my the addiction journey thing was a lot of writing. So like I wrote my way out of it a lot in a lot of ways, gaining insight.
00:24:41
Speaker
And that's creative because it comes from your head. So like yeah, I think... writing for sure and i get to do that but i still have to push myself to do it because it's not sort of normal monday tuesday wednesday thursday friday shit and you don't get all but you don't get validated for it in this capitalist society with you get when you have kids specifically like you get validated by bringing home that check but like yeah i could see us all living in greenwich village in the 60s and fucking doing it bro yeah i mean i i was cool with it i went pretty far i went i did it for a while trying to balance it forever but uh
00:25:15
Speaker
the thing about me is like i just talk shit all day every day in any situation so i feel like i get a i get know a little bit waking up yeah and talking shit i mean tomorrow night it's like a defense mechanism i think because i am actually kind of shy and so i have to like kick it in gear it's like tomorrow night i'll be at the event um i'll be fucking tears of a clown friends i'll be i'll be there going what the fuck am i doing but making everybody laugh That's a good feeling though. Matt was waiting for me.
00:25:46
Speaker
It's growth. Yeah. It's growth, man. It is growth. Dude, there's a guy, he just made me think, Jake, on the way in into our facility today, there was like I was listening to the guy who's actually on Joe Rogan, but this guy, Shaka Senghor, you ever heard of him?
00:25:59
Speaker
He's like black dude who went to prison for like 18 years and he essentially wrote his way out of prison, started writing books. He was in solitary confinement for like seven seven years. And, you know, it's Johnny Cash that we all had our prisons, didn't we? Whether we're in them or not.
00:26:14
Speaker
But writing stuff, dude, how do you how do you, like I can walk around talk shit, playing music, you hear something. Like to sit there and go, I got to sit down by myself in silence and write. How do you get motivated to do it?
00:26:25
Speaker
That's a tough thing to do. Once you get down, it starts flowing, right? Yeah. So ah for me, it's always been that I just want to empty my head a little bit, honestly. I've got to just get it out onto the piece paper. So um if I don't do it, I can tell I kind of get bogged down a little bit. So like for me, it's a strength. it's like it It becomes natural to me. It's like block of time type shit? are You're literally like Monday, 6th, maybe I got to...
00:26:51
Speaker
But you get, you know, you just, you're doing life. So you just kind of like forget, ah, shit, I'm feeling like shit because I haven't done this in a while. So I get to, what are you putting on paper? What do you like personal stuff? Are you like journaling types or are you actually writing ah around bigger issues or fictional or let's guess, let's guess what he writes.
00:27:09
Speaker
Oh yeah. I'm going to those books that like Fabio used to be on the cover of romantic, uh, passionate. Is that what you're writing? Romantic fiction. That's my guess. I'm guessing, no, going guess like some sort of creative way of expressing a life lesson or some aha moment that he has personally.
00:27:30
Speaker
Oh, yeah. Matt, you're right. It's the Fabio stuff. No, no. Lance, of course. i mean it's I like life insight. I like to kind of connect with that. I feel like there's purpose in it. So I ah dig that kind of stuff. So if that comes out in a little story or a song or just journal, that's that's the way that's the way it goes. It's just however it comes out kind of thing. i mean Back in the day when we were doing music, I was trying to channel it into words all the time like that for a song. Yeah.
00:28:01
Speaker
But it's the same stuff.
Sobriety, Anxiety, and Coping Mechanisms
00:28:02
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. That's great. What's your home life like, dude? What's your routine? You guys oh mine sleep in the same bed? What, me and my wife? Yeah.
00:28:13
Speaker
Yeah. Okay. And you guys, what time you go to bed and what time you wake up, dude? ah Super early. Earlier as I get older, the earlier it gets. I don't know. It's it's freaking... It starts getting light in Washington at like 4 in the morning and it it gets dark at like 10.30 in the summer. So like it's like a like living in Alaska or something. So I'm up early. um I'm in bed pretty early as well. like you know It's just kind of very normal and very consistent in that way unless we're doing something. But we're generally kind of like just...
00:28:44
Speaker
They shut it down and kind of get our sleep a little bit. Did yeah did that those did your hours change when you stopped drinking? You think? For sure. Yeah, trying to think. Mine did. Sleep got better, dude.
00:28:56
Speaker
Sleep got way better. Yeah, that's true. I probably would i probably stayed up later drinking. But it also made me tired. Sleep got better, yeah. Yeah, sleep got better. You know, mornings got better.
00:29:07
Speaker
I was more excited about the mornings. Yeah. They still suck, but it's not it it's not a quite a battle to together and get up. Yeah. You know, just that and unwanted anxiety that you put on yourself because you were doing whatever you were doing didn't exist anymore. so you just sort of got up and started your day. i wish I would have like just...
00:29:27
Speaker
this disdain for anything and everyone is just like, like people would write an email to me that they probably had to. I'm just like, motherfucker, Tuesday AM, m you got to hit me with it. It would like, would there be no rationality in it? It's like, oh, great, dude.
00:29:42
Speaker
Here come Mr. fucking Tuesday at 10 o'clock guy, huh? Gotta shoot me a work email at Tuesday at 10. Yeah, balls on this guy. Jesus. This guy ever fucking stop?
00:29:54
Speaker
yes And that was just that that was the alcohol that made you guys feel that way? Or is that just just fucking working in the corporate world? I think that you wake up. I think it's pretty natural. know. You guys tell me.
00:30:05
Speaker
I think it's pretty natural to wake up in the morning and have a little edge of anxiety sometimes where you're just like, ah, what's coming? Yeah. what's going to happen to me today? You know, until you kind of get your mind around, you know, maybe taking action or something.
00:30:19
Speaker
But I think it's pretty natural. But if you add in drinking late and doing negative stuff, you kind of like have to overcome that too. It's a little bit harder, I think. And I'm guessing you felt it, Lance, because I think some of it might have been, there's a combination drinking, but also like, am might this is what I want to do. There's always that.
00:30:36
Speaker
Sometimes circumstantial. that People actually do suck. And you're like, fuck this guy. yeah There's that. There's a... you know, could have been, could have been something else was on my mind, a fight with my wife or whatever, you know, but not, it's like the the more, the moral of the story is out. Any of that shit is going to happen in life and alcohol most likely is not going to make it better.
Avoiding Politics and Comedic Relief
00:30:57
Speaker
It's definitely not in the morning when you're fucking not feeling good is like, it does not help. So, well, some people would argue that it helps. It's funny the way you, you phrased writing. You said,
00:31:10
Speaker
What'd you say you said something about like getting it out or, or, uh, or releasing or something like that. It's probably like a place where we had alcohol to do that before or something like that. You know, like ah almost like an escape, um not, not just you and me probably for everyone, but, but like, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it's a good way to, to avoid shit a little bit. Right. Uh, but it also, you know, finding healthy ways to do that, uh, that are part of like what you do naturally. That's your part of your strengths is,
00:31:38
Speaker
is like kind of a lifelong goal, I guess, right? I mean, you guys do other stuff. I mean, this, you got this, oh this is probably part of that. This is a release. Yeah. Yeah, dude.
00:31:49
Speaker
For sure. It's my reminder of why I shouldn't get into politics. Every week I'll be upset. Come on. littleno just I'm just busting Lance's balls.
00:32:01
Speaker
he no i mean i just I think ah there's something there. like Am I avoiding life? Am I avoiding issues that I should? And I'm like, you can't force me to care, man. That's my stance right now. You can't force me to care about anything, politics.
00:32:17
Speaker
I'm like, I can't do it. like And I'm up here now. and When I come up here, I don't know why, but I try to listen because St. Louis is still pretty. there's like there's all like you never When you get outside the US, the angle on everything is pretty left. It's always coming from like CNN, Espanol, and all the local media is way far left like the the left. The rest of the world is way far left of the US, even the even the conservative parts.
00:32:40
Speaker
But you never get like conservative talk radio or conservative shit, so I try to listen to it when I'm here. And it's it's, I don't know, it's pretty entertaining. it's like Is it pretty jarring? coming but Because you have a perspective that a lot of people doubt.
00:32:53
Speaker
Is it like pretty jarring to have a different perspective? He likes it. He fucking likes it, Jake. yeah and that'ss I surfaced that in the last two episodes. yeah oh yeah He brought it to the surface.
00:33:04
Speaker
My right-wing lunatic stuff. but No, it's just... it's very It's just so divisive, I feel like. It's so divisive.
00:33:18
Speaker
Are you aroused by people with knee braces or ankle boots? You may have leg and foot injury fetish disorder. This is a growing problem and we can help. People with leg and foot injury fetish disorder, LFIFD, are drawn to temporary leg and foot injuries and get sexually charged at the site of rehabilitation equipment for the leg or foot.
00:33:39
Speaker
This disorder typically starts with visual exposure to heavy-duty knee braces, ankle boots, and knee walker scooters. Resisting treatment for LFIFD may deepen your obsession.
00:33:50
Speaker
Before too long, many patients find basic ankle wraps, knee sleeves, and compression socks turning them on.
Mind Games and Financial Perspectives
00:33:57
Speaker
Eventually, your addiction culminates into an outright sexual obsession for stories about hurt knees, shins, Achilles tendons, ankles, and even hips.
00:34:06
Speaker
Please get treatment for LFIFD as soon as possible. Call 1-800-LEG-FOOT for help.
00:34:15
Speaker
Isn't that funny, like, how... Like, was talking... talking with one of my colleagues the other day about this, that your mind essentially will just play tricks on you. I know that's an old adage, but it really is true. like It's literally goingnna it's going to tell you something and then you just essentially, it's it's true.
00:34:33
Speaker
yeah like You just start believing some story you made up in your own head. It's crazy. yeah you know It's like he's going to twist his ankle and your mood goes down and all this negative. It's usually like negative shit. It's crazy. i don't understand, man It's so hard to manage a bunch of stuff you have to deal with when you're we like just in general.
00:34:55
Speaker
And then if you've got your mind telling you weird shit, you're like, geez, well, that's not real. That's not real. That's not real. but like And that's the way that's the way it goes. and Does it ever go away? It's crazy.
00:35:06
Speaker
like There's just no reason for it. ah No, I'm saying I mean, I've gone through like so many life changes where I'm like, all right, this is this it's going away now. This is out of my life. This is in the note.
00:35:17
Speaker
but I mean, every time I come up here, I'm thinking of shit. ah What if he did this or what if and I'm like, what am I doing? I'll be like pretty pissed about something that may be the way what coat we put on a table or something for no fucking reason.
00:35:32
Speaker
But I but I think now the only thing i have is a is a mechanism to hear it and go, all right, stop. Sometimes it works. like I can't stop. And off switch, like, a little bit.
00:35:46
Speaker
It's insane. It's insane. but Well, tricked myself into believing that these certain milestones would relieve me of worry. Oh, yeah. So, it's just, snap it it in some ways it's come true, but in a lot of ways it hasn't. So, like, my daughter turning 18 and knowing that I was no longer legally responsible for any kind of dumb decisions, it...
00:36:09
Speaker
It helped a little, but not much. And then, you know, all going all the way back to like craving the time where we're not fucking paying for daycare and it's like 30 grand or whatever the fuck it was.
00:36:21
Speaker
And the raccoons take a shit on your solar panel, bro. There you go. Yeah, but when that was over, then it just got filled by something else. It got filled by youth sports and theater and fucking piano. And and just, you know, so so you just have to do the things that make sense in the moment, I think. and yeah And how do you shut your mind off in that? I don't know, Jake. Give us, pull out some of your writings, bro. Jesus.
00:36:46
Speaker
ah Yeah, no, I mean, that's interesting that like you bring up the whole daycare. It's literally like, the mafia. like They have you you. There's nothing you can do. You have to pay It's like a tribute. paying a tribute to like a neighborhood guy. Yeah, yeah.
00:37:02
Speaker
It's like the guy that comes by and he's expecting money from your bakery. It's like you have to give these kids, you know you got to put them somewhere because you got to work, you know whatever. It's just funny. I just remember thinking about that. good um As far as shutting off your brain, i don't know, it's hard. I mean, a lot of that stuff, you probably experience trying to do that in sports a lot, you know, trying to move on to the next play and all that kind of stuff. I think that's why sports are probably a good teacher for life.
00:37:32
Speaker
Because it does have to do with overcoming the failure in the moment and moving on and all that kind of thing. So I think it's it's just kind of ah being aware of when your mind's doing some dirty shit, playing tricks on you, and just kind of like you said, Matt, just put it aside and move on to the next.
00:37:50
Speaker
But it's just crazy that it that's the way we're wired. I mean, it's the human experience. and That's the the tricky. what's What's the function of it? Like why, why, why would it want to fuck me so hard?
00:38:00
Speaker
Why would it? I don't I'm sure there's a physio, like the anxiety was, was there, was there for a reason. like But the making up of the making up of problems. that yeah like What biological function does that serve?
00:38:16
Speaker
These are useless thoughts. and I would say 98% my thoughts are pretty useless. like Things will pop into my head. Next thing you know, I'm singing Seven Mary Three. My, my head. And I have no fucking clue why.
00:38:29
Speaker
like These are useless, purposeless thoughts. And there seems to be no biological function for this shit. Yeah. yeah It happens a lot with money. Like you, every day is the same, you know, cause you worry about where you're at money and you're like, you start to think about what's going to happen. You're worrying about yourself in 30 years or whatever, but every fucking day is the same. Whether you got rich or not, it's just like the same, but you have anxiety about it every fucking second.
Happiness, Contentment, and Cultural Differences
00:38:57
Speaker
Yeah. Which I don't, I want to think about the show. some of the shows Lance, like we did with Paul, we were, were, Like, do you find strength in the and worrying about it? Or, cause I used to say, to i used to tell my wife and she'd be like, you're always worried about money. and i And I would say, I'm not worried about money because I worry about money.
00:39:16
Speaker
Meaning yeah i I just know where we're at and I know what our budget is. So if you think that's worrying, it's like someone has to do it. but But it never really gave me like peace because I felt like and I had to worry about it.
00:39:28
Speaker
Now I don't because there's not much to worry about. So it's like it's like why poor people are are oftentimes very happy because it's like you can't worry about what's not there. So maybe. But I don't know. Do you think there's the this anxiety we have for everything? It's like, OK, if I'm prepared for every fucking thing, then I have less anxiety. Are you creating the anxiety by trying to be prepared for anything?
00:39:53
Speaker
That's the middle-aged dilemma, I think. It is, dude. And I succumb to it on both ends. But it I have come to to to feel that having it figured out to the best of my ability relieves more anxiety than just... For everything, not just money. Yeah, ignoring it.
00:40:13
Speaker
But there's no the met the the thing with money that's so tricky... is there's no common view of a reasonable measuring stick of what's enough. And i'm I'm like reading this book about these insane rich people who just buy yachts now that are worth a half a billion dollars only to show off how much richer they are than other people. <unk> just there's no There's no end to what I guess the human psyche will crave.
00:40:40
Speaker
And so that's ah that's the hard part. It moves every year. I think, oh, I'll be once once I get this or once I don't have that expense, dude, I'll be smooth sailing. And then it moves. No pun intended, huh?
00:40:53
Speaker
Yeah. Right. Oh, it's like, yeah so. That's right, buddy. Like Eastern thought is that, like Eastern philosophy stuff will tell you that,
00:41:04
Speaker
you're always trying to figure out what, I guess, what that measuring stick is for you, or you're trying to search for life's answers all the time. You get up in the morning, you're like, I got to take action. I'm trying to find this answer, that answer.
00:41:19
Speaker
Maybe there's no answers. And then you just kind of chill. I don't know. but That's what I'm talking about. But everybody, but everybody in whether it be you're trying to buy the biggest yacht, or you're, I don't know,
00:41:33
Speaker
you just go on your nine to five, whatever it is you're doing, it's gotta to be what you're, where you're happy. I mean, it sounds like Matt's happy as shit, you know, living on the mattress, you know, carrying wood.
00:41:46
Speaker
So, I mean, like, what, what's the problem with that? It's like, no problem. See, that's what I was saying earlier. When you, when you break it down, it sounds like, fuck, things didn't go the way it should have. But I mean, you worry about all that stuff. You're like, I got all these people, they, they are buying yachts and I'm,
00:42:03
Speaker
You know, I hate to keep saying that it's just funny with the mattress in the woods. But like, you know, but in truth, they do bind the yacht with another yacht and whatever.
00:42:14
Speaker
They could be fucking pissed off all the time. They're not happy. They got to worry about keeping the yacht, which is. Yeah. Is it happiness though? like our pu it's happiness and For me, it's happiness and experience. like That's what I want to do. want experience new stuff.
00:42:29
Speaker
I want to learn new stuff. I want to be happy. I'll be at peace. That's all. Well, what's happy, though though? Let's get into that word because that's kind of a... A tricky word. I got i got a question about about what you were saying too, Lance. You can define your happiness, Jake, first.
00:42:44
Speaker
i don't i don't what do you find I don't know how to find it ah define it, but I think it stems from being at peace. like You know the word content? Yes. That's like no-no word bar um Yeah, like in America.
00:42:59
Speaker
oh I thought you In America, like it seems to me, tell me. Marriage as well. yeah Like if you're content in America and you're not trying hard enough.
00:43:11
Speaker
I think that there's a place for where you can be content in life, which means you're peace you're at peace and you're happy, but you're also striving to do stuff you want to do. It doesn't mean that you got to buy the biggest yacht.
00:43:23
Speaker
And I think that I fall somewhere in there as far as happiness and peace. because consider because Brilliant words. That's where I am. Brilliant words. That's so true. but Content is a settling in the U.S. s Totally. and if Well, Matt, you tell me. like If you go outside, it's probably not the same, right? If he somebody i said you're content, you're probably – 100% it's not.
00:43:43
Speaker
Right. Yeah. It's, it's, it's very, um, everybody wants to mix like the gringos want to to crush it here and then go down there and and live that way. But, but do it with their financial success behind them, you know? So they like, I just want to be Pura Vida and content in Costa Rica, but they won't do it until they made five mil to come down there. You know, people that same with like pride people that go down to Arizona when they're 65 or Costa Rica or Florida, um,
00:44:10
Speaker
Yeah, we we can't do it. We can't just do it. Can't just be content. You got to do that first and then do it. And you'll find in other places people do it, even like and southern Europe, a lot of those countries but that we look at those people like they don't do shit. They sit around, drink coffee and it used to be smoke cigarettes. And we're like, oh, the fuck.
00:44:30
Speaker
And that's true contentment. They're just like hanging out. We don't get it. We don't get it. They're validated differently though. Why do they all speak multiple languages? So they validate each other for like their knowledge of culture and different countries, their ability to have conversations, their ability to hang out and be interesting.
00:44:49
Speaker
We're validated for one fucking thing for the most part. How much cash are we making? And then maybe how ripped we are. and much um ah and How hard do you party? ah yeah howard hard i think it like How hard you pound? I think Yeah, there you go. That is true. like Women or whatever, that money,
00:45:12
Speaker
money women power and and vanity is really like like your body and stuff like that but yeah it's definitely But I think you even saying what they're validated at, I don't i think in other places you you don't need validation.
00:45:26
Speaker
So you're like, you're not speaking for it. So even at that level, it's not it's not necessarily validated because they speak eight languages. They're not even speaking. the expectations are are different of of what you'll bring to the table, I would say. I still meet tons of people that foreigners that are still like...
00:45:44
Speaker
see the American dream and think it's amazing. They still are like, that's so great what you guys have there. and And in many ways it's true, but it's, it's not like everyone's immune to it just cause you're outside the country, but you definitely see, i I just see in the poor communities, I see more happiness than here.
00:46:00
Speaker
Like there's definitely a sense of like, okay, everything's fine. And this is is all it's going to be. and and people come to terms with that. So yeah, content is a four letter word in the content content in the U S I mean, if you think about like,
00:46:13
Speaker
If your spouse said, yeah, I'm content with our relationship, you'd almost be offended. You'd be like, oh, oh yeah. that's it yeah um' I'm content with our sex life. It's like. Yeah, no, you don't use that word in America. Have you told your wife, I'm i'm content with your weight right now?
00:46:29
Speaker
I'm content with your weight. I mean, yeah. Oh, my God. You can cut a few, but it's – but I was – yeah, it's definitely – don't know. But but we're we're ruining the world, so don't worry because everyone is going to be in the same path that we are. Like we're spreading the the American culture everywhere, and everyone is going be unhappy and fat. It's ah it's already happened.
00:46:50
Speaker
So take comfort in that. Okay. man Makes me, makes me feel good. Oh, but Lance, I wanted to ask you. Yeah. I forgot. Oh, well, you know what, just back to what we were talking about, the planning and the stress, the anxiety versus being like, did you get any, you get any joy, so to speak, of being like,
00:47:12
Speaker
Okay. The raccoon thing's a great example. Did you sit to yourself and be like, ha ha fuckers, I have had a rainy day fun for the last 20 years, so I've been prepared for this. And Jess, were you just like, I'm so good.
00:47:22
Speaker
I'm so prepared. like did you did that give you Did that give you some peace? Yes, for sure. I'm not going to feel like a badass or or anything like that, but I definitely feel like it's all good. less of a negative.
00:47:36
Speaker
That's Yeah, it's not as bad. Because some people would just be like, I would like to, I mean, I'd like to be prepared. I'm not that, like, I'd like to be prepared for stuff like that eventually again, again I should say. But like, ah if you can get to that mindset where you're like,
00:47:52
Speaker
I feel like we talk, don't know if we talked about this on or off, but a little bit of like shit happens. I've realized that and i don't freak out as much when shit happens, but some stuff is bad and and you're going to feel bad. But i I would like to get to the state where I'm somewhat prepared financially and emotionally, but also I have that attitude of like, yeah, shit happens.
00:48:10
Speaker
It's okay. And so I don't have like the roller coasters, the up and downs where I'm like, oh shit, this is a horrible thing happening and I'm in a panic, you know? But I also like the way I'm, if I just went on the way I'm now,
00:48:22
Speaker
making no money on the mattress, it it probably wouldn't work regardless of how hippie and zen I can be. Like I probably need to get a little action going.
00:48:33
Speaker
We should face the facts there that you can always go get it. You could go get a corporate job. You could talk your way into that whether you want to or not. Right. I'd probably have to come back here. Maybe not to. Maybe not to.
00:48:46
Speaker
That bad things happen, that that concept in itself, it's like, it's so true, man. Just in the time I've talked to you, of the three car wrecks, my son smashed into our garage, replaced that. My daughters had two fender benders.
00:48:59
Speaker
that That ended up being really expensive. ah You know, got the coons, had some pipes blow up. You can fill a list of dumb things like that every year. never fucking stops.
00:49:11
Speaker
Never stop. So yeah planning for all that is a miserable, miserable life, if that's what you want to do. Yeah. So it's like a mindset deal anyway. And as you get further down the road in age, you get perspective. And I think that's what probably dulls it a little bit. So you're not so upset about raccoons or whatever. Maybe you are.
00:49:32
Speaker
yeah But, you know, you get into a place where you have perspective. Yeah. But at the same time, it's annoying shit. And what's it all for? And you start to ask all that shit. You're just like, man, I'm just i'm just paying off these raccoons till the next family of raccoons come.
00:49:48
Speaker
Yeah. What's it all for? I don't even know what it's all for.
Aspirations and Life’s Unpredictability
00:49:51
Speaker
You guys are going to get there when you have to figure out what you're going to do with your time when when you're it's not necessarily locked in from a job perspective.
00:50:00
Speaker
That will be interesting. I'm not allowed to say I'm going to surf a lot because Lance has basically already i told me got like two years left physical activity. No. You're not gonna be able to do it like you think.
00:50:12
Speaker
10 years from now? No fucking more. You're saying I'm gonna be a long boarder, dude. That's lame. But Jake, how are you thinking about that, the future? Like actually in terms of your experience? The future? What will you be doing?
00:50:25
Speaker
You're gonna be like, ah you want a guy that wants to hit the cruise scene? and No. Yeah. You're not drinking, so that'd be a terrible fit. Nah. I mean... I wouldn't be a cruiser. Walk around judging people. That'd be so fun.
00:50:40
Speaker
Oh, drinking again. Are you, Bob? oh I'd like to, i don't know. I mean, I'd like to actually, teach college course or two and something. That'd be fun.
00:50:53
Speaker
I don't know. Probably in the realm of learning and experiencing shit. So, yes, I would like to travel more and see old stuff and, you know, that kind of stuff. I like that stuff.
00:51:04
Speaker
Mm-hmm. That just adds value to you. How do you feel about that? you know What's that that? That only adds value to you, your experience. What about other people? ah Yeah, I mean, you're talking about the immediate family?
00:51:19
Speaker
Purpose. Or you could be like, when I get down with my kid, I'm going to be down the soup kitchen every day, or I'm going to be... Whoa, whoa, whoa, yeah, hear you. Yeah. You're only enriching yourself. The tour guide is happy that he's there. Shelling out a few bucks. He gets the benefit from it.
00:51:36
Speaker
Walking around the Coliseum or some shit. Right? people Yeah, I don't know. Maybe I can find a way to... Maybe I can find a way to be a Walmart greeter. I don't
00:51:49
Speaker
don't... What do you do, dude? Do you like... When you were younger, what did you think you were going to do in life? Like, do you ever try to reconcile all the way back then? Mm-mm. Or do you just view your younger self as a silly fool? I think I live literally... Cubbies?
00:52:07
Speaker
Never knew what I was going to do. Playing for the Cubbies? I don't think I ever did. Yeah. I think that like when you're playing sports, you're like... Even back when I was playing sports, I never thought I was going to be like the starting center fielder for the Chicago Cubs or something like that. I just always felt like that was going to come to an end.
00:52:23
Speaker
But I spent all my time doing it. Whatever, whatever. But I don't think I ever knew. like ah I just kind of it's been on a self-exploration of figuring out what my purpose is and I think in the end,
00:52:35
Speaker
I was a teacher for a bit. always felt most natural when I was supporting people. And now I'm an operations manager, supervisor guy. So like, that's all I really do. so like, kind of like in a way doing all that stuff that I'm most natural at.
00:52:49
Speaker
But no, I didn't like, I don't know. Did you, did you go, going to be a basketball player or I'm going to be a football player? I think I thought I'd do it be a stockbroker, which is a profession that no longer exists.
00:53:01
Speaker
But yeah I think I thought I'd do that. But what I didn't understand is, I didn't have a huge capacity for stress. And that's the thing I think a lot of young people miss is you really are looking for a job that aligns with your day-to-day life. Like that feels good to you. Some people need to take a nap.
00:53:20
Speaker
Some people are fucking dialed in from eight in the morning till six every day. Some people are more spotty. You know, I need two hours here, two hours there. And that's the toughest thing, I think.
00:53:34
Speaker
That was very tough for me to figure out. Yeah, no, I mean, you do have to kind of like figure it out because at some point you get into the workforce and whatever. I mean, I started in service. Like, I think my first paying gig was mowing lawns with.
00:53:49
Speaker
That's that guy. Do guy? Of course, dude. Last time, one time you told us, Jake, that he was a roofer and had two dogs. Oh, really?
00:54:00
Speaker
I said that? Yeah. Did I make enough stories? I don't think i said that. That might have been like years ago. Well, I only asked because there's another friend that we knew recently that had passed. Yeah.
00:54:12
Speaker
um Yeah, that's that's the other thing too. You start to compare life or you start thinking in those terms and we've already discovered that or discussed it, but it's also like you come across these huge life events that people have and you're like, wait a minute, are we at that age?
00:54:26
Speaker
It's crazy. you know some are Some are too soon and some are, you know we're starting to get to the point where it's not too soon anymore. you know like it's Maybe it's like a life of repeated health problems or whatever, whatever, and your body gives out.
00:54:39
Speaker
but It's interesting to get to that level, like to that perspective when you're like, all right, I've lived i've lived a few years now, you know? know.