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C1 E4: Honey I shrunk the party
30 Plays11 months ago
Follow the goons as they bust into a seemingly empty shack to escape the giant rock monster chasing them. Will they escape? Are they sure the shack is empty? Listen and find out for yourself.
CONTENT WARNING: This episode contains fantasy violence, crime, potential trigger statements, and strong profanity. Visit Https://www.linktr.ee/tacticalcrits for social media, Spotify, Apple Podcasts and our Youtube channel.
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Transcript
Escape and Encounter in Granite Heart Kingdom
00:00:29
Speaker
to a tactical crits.
00:00:32
Speaker
A viewer discretion is advised. Last time, in the world of Aram, a group of escaped prisoners made their way through the deep tunnels of Granite Heart Kingdom on their way to Eowyn City to find a lost artifact that could change the history of Aram forever. During the trek, they happened upon their first encounter, a group of goblins waiting to ambush them. After seeming to vanquish them easily, the goblins summoned a great stone monster to their aid. The party quickly realized they needed to retreat and recover,
00:01:02
Speaker
Quickly, the adventurers ran into an abandoned shack. Will the goblins and their bees catch them? How much shelter will this provide? Only time will tell if they can make it to their destination safely. Dun dun dun.
Meet the Dungeon Master and Players
00:01:21
Speaker
Welcome back to the world of Aram. I'm Dean Balter, and I'm going to be your DM today. I'm joined by...
00:01:29
Speaker
Hey everybody, I'm Chase Dixon. I'm the voice of Axon of the Golden Fang. And a fun fact about Axon is he has a recurring dream that he's hunting on the fields of Antara and he's running down the field and then he falls off a cliff and wakes up before he hits the bottom. Hey, you got one on their feet, so that's true, but it's a pretty high. It's a big cliff.
00:01:57
Speaker
Yeah, he's going to land on his feet and then all of his feet are going to break. Wait, can we homebrew this mechanic when I get slow fall that I always land on my feet? I guess we'll have to see next time you fall off of something really, really high, which is going to happen this episode. It might give him a possibility.
Character Backgrounds and Band Life
00:02:22
Speaker
Hey, my name's Matt Jiggleson. I play Noct for Tenebrous. My character actually really enjoys reading, especially for since the past year, just kind of like finding himself and looking at different theologies of how to think. And it's helping him steer on a path that's really his. Nerd.
00:02:51
Speaker
Very nice. I am Zach Balter. I play Bruce David. And contrary to most snakes, Bruce does have male sex organs. Well, oh, wait, wait. No. For every snake, I'm so excited you brought this up. For every snake that has a dick, there are two snake dicks. What? What? Yes. All snakes have two dicks. There you go. OK. Well, then my fun fact is that Bruce has two dicks.
00:03:22
Speaker
Contrary to other snakes, he actually has three dicks. Yeah. Yeah. How many dicks does Samwise have? He's a normal snake. He's got two wieners.
00:03:32
Speaker
Hey everyone, I'm Kent Rawlings. I play Vexos Nightshade. Fun fact about Vexos this episode is that even though that he is a drow, he actually, one of his long friends from long ago, helped him to hone his sunlight sensitivity. So he is not at disadvantage in the sunlight. I like how you just gave yourself not disadvantage.
00:04:01
Speaker
for your race, that's crazy. I thought we had talked about that the last time. We totally did talk about that. No, I know, I'm just kidding. Oh, okay. Hey, you motherfucker. What's the fun fact about our DM? Yeah, what kind of crazy maniacal plans do you have? Come on, dad. Oh, shit. Fun fact about me is I used to be in a band.
00:04:28
Speaker
What's it called? So people can find it on Spotify. The most famous song is Elm Street by Lakeside. Look it up on YouTube. Did you go back to play? You went back to the States to play with them recently, right? Yeah, not that long ago, we did a reunion show. It's pretty good. Did you play Elm Street? No big deal, but I came up on stage when they played Elm Street. Oh, my God. Did you crowd surf, Zach? I did, and then I got kicked out.
00:04:54
Speaker
Yeah, apparently there was no crowd surfing allowed, which we didn't know. And I crowd surfed before him totally fine. He crowd surfs bodyguard or not bodyguard, Jesus. Bouncer comes in, grabs him, throws him out. And then I had to go talk to the guy who owned the place to be like, dude, that's my brother. He had no idea. Please let him back in. Yeah, I know a piece of shit. What do you like to say? Lakeside does make some pretty punk rock music.
00:05:22
Speaker
What was the venue? Were you guys in a bar or? No, this is an actual place, but I'm not going to put them on blast. That's fair. They're already blasted enough. I'm not going to say the name of the place. That's just so weird that a place. So it's like, it's like we're musicians commonly come through. Yeah. I think it's just because for people who like jump off stage, like you can get really funny. I'm not saying they probably get insurance. Yeah, it's an insurance liability insurance thing. I don't, I don't blame them for it, but it was a pretty, it was a pretty wild night.
00:05:52
Speaker
Well, they probably like we can't kick this guy out for crowd surfing because he's literally the front man. But. But Zach, yeah, fuck that guy. Fuck Zach. Yeah, seriously. You look like a car. No, I sang. He's got fucking fucking pipes, dog. Thanks. I appreciate that. All right. So.
Shrinking Ray Malfunction and Giant Room
00:06:16
Speaker
Last last adventure, you started walking down trying to get to Elwin City.
00:06:22
Speaker
As you guys went through this little tunnel, you found a dead baby that were attacked by goblins, ran directly into their trap, and almost got mauled by a giant rock. Well, someone did get mauled. Some of us did get mauled. Yeah, he did get mauled. And then you guys jumped into a room. What's in the room? Let me get a history check.
00:06:51
Speaker
from all of you. Well, I'm actually good at history. Okay. I don't know what history is. That's a 12. 19. Okay. You remember. Yeah, that's a six. For the audience, I rolled a two. Perfect. God damn. So as all of you slam through this door, jump in,
00:07:20
Speaker
Uh, Noctifer, you remember that right before you left, Thryn had said to check the windows before going into random buildings. Yeah. You didn't check. No, no. We were getting chased by a rock. What are you? Pfft. Oh yeah, that's fair. That's fair. As you guys bust into this room. Oh.
00:07:48
Speaker
You look around and everything starts to grow. The room starts getting bigger and bigger and bigger. And you see that there was a desk that was a few feet into this shack and a machine shooting a beam of light directly into you. As everything gets bigger and bigger and bigger, you see
00:08:18
Speaker
It got to the point where you can see that the desk that it was on is now at least 300 feet above the ground. And you start hearing behind you a extremely giant rock man coming towards the door, like, like that, like the dog.
00:08:44
Speaker
can we can we still what else is in the room besides the desk and and all that fun jazz so give me a perception check from everyone okay well that's it that's a three ooh that's a not one oh that's a 23 14 so
00:09:14
Speaker
Bruce and Axon, you're like holy fuck. This room just got really fucking big. There's a bunch of shit everywhere. There's, you know, a normal kitchen over somewhere but it's now fucking hundreds and hundreds of feet bigger than it used to be. You see that everything is just like super big and Noctifer and Vexus.
00:09:34
Speaker
Vexos, you start looking around, and you look behind you, and you see this giant rock monster that you had seen before, but for some reason, he's hundreds of feet taller, but he's not. You guys shrunk. I'm gonna use Detect Magic to try to see where this source is coming from that's shrinking us. So. I'm gonna tell everyone to hide. Quick hide! That's probably a good idea.
00:10:06
Speaker
Yeah, I'm gonna get underneath the desk. Hey, since the rock almost was like huge and he's expecting like us, are we gonna have advantage? Oh, he doesn't see you. Okay. He was not expecting you guys to become almost the size. You're like the size of ants. Yeah. And you can see him come up to the door. He's peeks his head in. He's looking around.
00:10:32
Speaker
And then he starts walking out and just, you could hear him rolling around, presumably looking for you guys. I take back my detect magic spell cast. As you guys are looking around, you hear off to the side. Hello, you need to come over here. There is somewhere we need to hide. There's a lot of rats and stuff you need to get away from.
00:11:03
Speaker
Oh, dear God. Yeah, I'm gonna I look over. Who is it? Do I know it? Like, see who's talking? So you look over and you see a human and he has one arm missing the other arm. He's got a mechanical like robot type arm. He has scars all over his face and all over his body. His black hair is long and mangled up.
00:11:31
Speaker
It kind of looks like he hasn't showered or groomed himself in God knows how long. He's got a beard that's like almost down to his feet. The full of lice. Is there lice in his beard? Oh, no, the lice are probably too big for his beard. And he's screaming at you guys to come follow him right by a wall where there's a little crack that he he's standing by.
00:12:01
Speaker
Oh yeah, I'm gonna go over there. Can we leave the room? You could. Like you can leave outside and be tiny. Yeah. Oh, I was hoping it was. I'm going to the guy with the mechanical arm. Yeah, I'll follow. Okay. So you guys go up to him.
00:12:22
Speaker
And he says, how did you get in here? You should not go into random places. You just walk into random shack? Motherfucker, did you see the rock monster that came in behind us? No, it was actually the golden flag what to do. Motherfucker, did you see the rock monster that came behind us? Look.
00:12:48
Speaker
I just don't understand why you would go into a random house. Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!
00:13:17
Speaker
And, uh, Johnny Phelps looks over and he's like, do you see this gigantic, uh, machine up there on top of this desk? Yeah. Sure. I did what I walked in. Not anymore. Fucking tiny. So I am, let's say kind of a rebel and I like to make, you know, little contraptions. And I thought a, a shrinkering ray.
00:13:46
Speaker
would make a lot of money. The problem is I accidentally shrunk myself, obviously, and I have no idea how I'm going to get up there to fix it, because I'm just one person. But now we have a couple people you can, you want to help? Are you telling me you're the reason that we're small?
00:14:14
Speaker
Yes, I'm going to him. I'm also just doing an unarmed strike. Yeah, yeah, it's five four damage. The world is getting hit him. Oh, yeah. Does any does it does a 17 hit a 17 does it? Yeah, 17. Yeah.
00:14:38
Speaker
Alright, he takes 4 damage, and he's like, oh, motherfucker, you don't understand. If I do not go up there, you cannot get the pig again. I hate you. I hate you. What? Yes, we're gonna- What did it for us, Mr. Sand? We're gonna fucking help you. What did it for us? Hey Doug Knight, shut the fuck up!
00:15:02
Speaker
Also, if you'd like, I can bring you over to my place. I have these little contraptions I put on my neck so I don't have to sound like a high-pitched loser. No, I think this is funny. Okie dokie, it's fine by me. I'm going to take one of those contraptions. Actually, I'm going to take one of these contraptions just purely from my voice. It hurts. Yeah, I don't know if I can do my accent with a high-pitched.
00:15:30
Speaker
So you go into his little room, his little crack in the wall, and he has all these little different contraptions around him. He's got like a tiny grappling hook. He's got these tiny voice modulators that he has. It looks like he has another shrinking ray, but it's also super, super tiny. And you can see next to it that there's even smaller things. I pick it up and shoot Noctifer with the super small shrinking ray.
00:16:01
Speaker
Oh my god. Do you really? Yeah, absolutely. Knocked you from giving me a dexterity saving throw to see if you can get out of the way. Whoa, guys, look at this thing. 16. Honey, I shrunk the paladin. 16. You barely get out of the way. And
00:16:25
Speaker
This this beam of light shoot right past you hits into one of the swords that's behind you and it becomes to you the size of a toothpick and which is pretty much the size of a grain of sand for the regular size. I'm going to glare at vexis and tell him we're going to talk later. I just look at the thing. I'm like, yeah, this thing is fucking sick. Oh, actually. Hey, keep a focus. Hold on. I see you are shrinking.
00:16:56
Speaker
Johnny Phelps grabs this back and he's like, what the fuck are you doing? You're going to make us even smaller. After this, you will never get to be big size again. We're going to die. And he takes- Oh, Max, you were gonna kill me. Oh, sorry. He says, look, we need to get to the top of this big desk and we need to get to the shrinking array. And I can cross some wires, make it to a bigger array.
00:17:26
Speaker
and then we get bigger. I tried to do with this mini one, but it doesn't work because it's so small. Hey, Johnny Phelps, question for you. I pick up the grappling hook. What land do you hail from? Well, originally I came from the islands of tranquility, the islands of tranquility, but I've been all over.
00:17:56
Speaker
moved around a lot to make a lot of things to sell for lots of money. And now I am poor and small. I walk out with the grappling gun. Okay. So you guys start walking or does everyone else start walking out or? Yeah, I mean, I'll go fucking fix us then. Right. So you guys are walking.
Rat Ride to the Shrinking Ray
00:18:20
Speaker
And as you guys walk out of this place, he's he's like, Hey, look,
00:18:24
Speaker
We need to be very careful. There are some cockroaches and there are also some rats and some other things that we need to definitely stay away from. And you guys start walking out and you can see on the floor giant bottles, presumably beer and ale bottles that were on the floor. You see giant bags of
00:18:56
Speaker
fried potatoes that are very crunchy. And you can also see some rat droppings kind of close to where all the food is that's near the desk. Is there a chair? There is a chair. How big are the rat droppings compared to us? They're about almost your size. And the chair that you see is like
00:19:26
Speaker
tucked up right by the desk. Does the grappling gun reach the chair? You have to shoot to find out. But at this point, you guys are still kind of far away from it. So you're gonna have to travel in small turns, like 300 feet in big terms, like 10 feet. Okay. Well, we should probably like try to sneak our way over there.
00:19:54
Speaker
I'm going to move from rat dropping to rat dropping using it as covering concealment. Yeah. Uh, I need you guys to, um, if you guys are just like, just go on or are you guys being, being stealthy? I'm going to be stealthy. Yeah. I'm going to be stealthy. Yeah. Stealthy as I can, I guess. Cause I have. We'll need some stealth checks. Okay. Well, that's a, that's a natural 20.
00:20:20
Speaker
16 and a 13 okay so we're gonna so yeah i got a real disadvantage so i got a 13 16 i got an 11 27 all right as you guys are walking going ratford to ratford and
00:20:39
Speaker
getting around this big bag of what seemed to be crunchy fried potatoes in thin slices almost like a chip style. And you start hearing and you can see coming towards Bruce, there's a big rat sniffing the air trying to find you guys.
00:21:06
Speaker
Meat. There's only one rat. Only one rat. I am going to cast Animal Friendship. Oh, my God. Ride the rat. Ride the rat. Yeah. He needs a wisdom saving through 13. Well, if intelligence is higher than four, it doesn't work. But no, it's a rat. OK, just double checking. Yes, it needs a wisdom check of 13. All right.
00:21:36
Speaker
Is this our pickle Rick era moment? It's a six. All right. So I can't speak rat, but I'm going to look at the rat and I'm going to do some like hand signs. Like, like, let me ride you. Like pause, pause. You know what I meant.
00:21:57
Speaker
Alright. You get up on this rat and you just start riding it like a horse, I guess. I'm gonna look at a... What was the dude's name? Johnny Phelps. Yeah, Johnny Phelps. I'm gonna be like, yo, Johnny Phelps, hop on. I'll take us to the top, man. Don't worry.
00:22:17
Speaker
Well, thank you very much. I've never had the opportunity to ride one of these. Last time they fucking bit off my arm and he jumps up on top of, uh, this rat right behind you and you guys continue moving. What do you guys want to do? I mean, I figured we all hop on the rat, right? Yeah. You guys can pretty much all fit on the rat. I don't like rats.
00:22:39
Speaker
Bruce, tell the rat to climb. I'm going to give him like a horse kick. We like. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. I'm going to point to the top of that, like the desk area where where we need to go, where our goal is. Are you holding us whiskers like for rain? I'm holding on to like hair in the back. So you do that and it starts. It starts running towards this big desk.
00:23:09
Speaker
And as you get closer, you start noticing that there are more rats coming out around the desk looking at you guys, like directly at you. Right now they're about a hundred feet away from you.
Battle atop Rats and Desk Climb
00:23:25
Speaker
You guys have moved about, about 200 feet since you got on the fucking rat. And you see them about a hundred feet away from you starting to come towards your area. They're coming from the right.
00:23:38
Speaker
And on the left-hand side, you start seeing a couple of cockroaches just munching on some chips. Bruce, make this thing go faster. Yeah, I'm going to kick a game. Give it like a cha, cha.
00:23:57
Speaker
So you started doing that. You take like a, a dash action pretty much. You guys get to like the foot of the desk and as you're getting there, you are now getting circled by the mice. Sorry, the rats that were on your right hand side. They started like sprinting at you seeing a four people on top of one of their rat friends, presumably thinking that you guys are probably hurting it.
00:24:25
Speaker
and they're going to run directly at you. I would like to attempt to jump up onto the desk and use my feline sensibilities to climb this desk. You may. I would also like everyone to roll for initiative. Damn it. There it is, 18. Oh, boy. 17. The lowest I've rolled for an initiative of seven.
00:24:56
Speaker
Well, seven. Oh, seven rolled a three. That sucks. Get good. It happens. So at the top of the order, uh, is Bruce. Oh, sweet. Okay. Well, I guess I'm going to use my last spell slot to you speak with animal. Okay. So you've got four rats around you and then your honor rat. Which one are you talking to? I'm going to talk to our rat.
00:25:26
Speaker
OK. And I'm going to be like, hey, man. Oh, sorry. Hold on. Hey, Mr. Rat guy. Yeah. Oh, you can talk to me. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I couldn't before, but now I can. Can you do me a favor and tell your boys to kind of, you know, back off a little bit? We're just trying to try to get big again. You know, we're just trying to be normal sized humans, humanoids. Oh, give me give me one second. And he's going to look over to his buddies and
00:25:58
Speaker
And they converse for a little bit back and forth. And he looks at you and he says, well, I got no of them to say they'll leave. The other two, not so much. They think you would make a really tasty snack. Do you like these other two people?
00:26:23
Speaker
I mean, once my brother and the other one is my cousin, but other than that. I'm asking because if we happen to hurt these people, are you still going to be my friend? Well, I would prefer that you didn't. Oh, oh, I'm going to relay this to the rest of the team. So everybody's tracking what's going on.
00:26:48
Speaker
And as you do that, you see that two of the other rats go back and they're kind of still looking back at you, but they slowly make their way away from you. But these other two rats are now looking at you guys like they're ready to try to take you as some snacks. Bruce, tell our fucking rat friend to climb this stupid ass table. Hey, Mr. Rat Friend, what's your name?
00:27:16
Speaker
It's time. Hey, Todd, how do you feel about climbing this table and trying to get us out of here a little bit? Well, sure. Yippee. Yeah, I guess he's going to try to run up as fast as he can.
00:27:30
Speaker
The way this is gonna work, he has a climbing speed of 30. You guys have to get up to about 300 feet. As he's doing that, you guys are gonna be trying to get rid of these other rats. And yeah. Jesus Christ. All right. I'm gonna pass here. So you guys go 30 feet up and Axon, you had jumped off, right? Yup.
00:28:00
Speaker
OK, just just remembering. Up next is an octifer. I am going to I'm going to cast fireball at the nearest fucking rat. That's still pursuing us. All right. Roll to see if you hit 18. 18 does hit. Yeah. Good. Good. All right. Where the fuck is my detail at? There we go. Have you checked your asshole?
00:28:31
Speaker
Uh, eight, eight, eight damage. Okay. And so you shoot this fire bolt at him. It fucking hits into his whiskers. They start like fraying up a little bit and you can see his face and hair start kind of burning. And then it kind of goes out. So this first rat that's running up towards you now just has like a burnt scarring face. And he is really unhappy that you just did that. So he's squeaking up like
00:29:02
Speaker
We're gonna clip that hey stay away and there won't be any more And objects is Nexus Yeah, so I'm gonna pull out the grapple gun. All right, and I'm gonna shoot it towards the top of the table and Yeah, all right you shoot it up and it goes about
00:29:33
Speaker
a hundred feet and then drops back down this and now it's dangling pretty much like on the floor and you can reel it up if you want on your next action. God damn it. All right. Well, I guess that's one way to find out how far I can go. Yeah, you know, someone's got to do it. We did. We never asked Phelps. He built it. I don't care. Fuck that guy. Fair enough. I don't like anyone named Johnny Phelps.
00:30:03
Speaker
you what the fuck you don't like me just because my name is Johnny Phelps this is not okay you you are the reason we are in this predicament but true well first of all the reason you're in this predicament is because you came in through my door so oh why the fuck do you have a shrink ray pointed at the fucking door well I was working on it and that's how this happened with me I just so you're a fucking idiot
00:30:33
Speaker
Well, I created a shrink away. So I'm not that stupid. Hey, book, book, smart, but not streets. All right. Intelligence, not wisdom. I'm going to fucking just hold this grappling gun and fucking look at it and try and figure out how it works while I'm next next turn trying to reel it up. That's going to bring us to Exxon. Yeah, so I'm going to I'm going to try and
00:31:04
Speaker
Hmm. Yeah, I'm gonna I'm gonna continue to climb up this wall as best I can. What's my my movement speeds 45 feet. So do I get that full in climbing? I believe it's usually half. Okay, so make it 22 and I'll take the Oh, are any of the rats beneath me?
00:31:30
Speaker
Uh, right now, yeah, right now they're all on the floor. They're going to start climbing up to you. What I would say though, because I'm nice is there is now a rope, uh, that would bring 30 feet up. That's dangling, uh, from Vexus's hand. Vexus isn't nearly physically robust enough to withstand this climb. Uh, so I'm going to.
00:31:59
Speaker
I'm going to attempt to jump off the wall and land my spear in the back of the head of one of the of one of the rats. OK, so just roll roll to see if you hit. Thirteen. Hits. Yes. Cool. So I got the real damage real quick.
00:32:30
Speaker
Oh, that's two handed too, so it's a D8. Are you going to hit the rat with the scarring face or the other one? No, no, no, no. I'm going to ride this bitch like Yoda on Luke. Try to try to have it carry me higher up the desk. So that's five damage. And now I am holding on for dear life as it as it runs up the runs up to the desk.
00:32:58
Speaker
So you jump down, stab this thing in the back. And it does start running up the leg. But his buddy is also running side by side. And he's going to be trying to grab you or bite you and try to bite you off of of this this other wrap. I'm gonna wag my tail in its eyes and just like so they're gonna you guys are gonna run up 30 feet.
00:33:27
Speaker
And he misses you two different times trying to. Oh, wait, shit. No, does a 16 hit. Fuck. Oh, boy. It hits all of us. Yeah. Yeah, he goes to bite bite you once, completely misses and then takes his claws and swipes it at you. And he does. Two points of damage. Oh, thank God.
00:33:56
Speaker
What I will say is just so you know, if you do end up getting hit for enough damage, you will have to make a constitution saving throw to make sure you don't fall off of, uh, this other rat. Okay. And up next is Bruce or Ken. No, it's Ken.
00:34:23
Speaker
when guardian levio saw I'm gonna use my action to fucking reel in the the grapple hook like a fishing line just all right yeah yeah I'm just
00:34:40
Speaker
just as fast as possible. And in my head, I'm thinking the entire time, this fucking lion always gets himself into the worst situations possible. Holy fuck. So you start reeling it up. And that's gonna bring us to our
00:35:02
Speaker
brat friend who is being written right now mountain. So he's gonna run up as much as he can. And he's gonna try to buck off axon. So with him just bucking you off and not trying to hurt you. I'd say it's a pretty easy Dex or sorry. Yeah, some type of like Dex save. Yeah.
00:35:32
Speaker
That's a mod 20 Yeah, you are you're able to manage on he starts trying to like buck you off like a bull as he's as he's running And you're able to like hold on for dear life I'm grabbed I'm gripping him. I got one hand on the spear one hand on his fucking ear. I Just became I just became another tactical crits character there for a second And That'll bring us to
00:36:03
Speaker
Bruce. So Bruce is going to look at the the rat with the burnt face, and he's going to cast vicious mockery. Oh, it's a string of insults laced with subtle enchantments at a creature you can see with within range. If the target can hear you, though it may need not understand you, it must succeed on a wisdom saving throw of 13.
00:36:27
Speaker
or take 1d4 of psychic damage. What are you gonna say to it? Well, yeah, what are you gonna say? Yeah, so I'm gonna cast it. I'm gonna yell at me, you stupid frat bitch. You get out of here, you stupid frat bitch. You can't hurt us. This, this rat looks over at you. And you can see a little bit of pain in its eyes as it as one tear starts to go down its face. So I see what it hits. Oh, he fails.
00:36:57
Speaker
Yeah, with this also, his next attack is a disadvantage. Oh, that's good. Thank you. And he takes four damage. Oh, nice. The next person up is Noctifer. OK. Well, since the rat didn't want to fucking listen, I'm tossing another fireball touch his ass. All right. See if you see if you can hit.
00:37:27
Speaker
does a 12 hit a 12 just hits okay seven all right you shoot this this rat right in the face with another fireball and first off it's tier that it was having from vicious mockery
00:37:43
Speaker
just kind of like disappears from from evaporation. And then a blast of fucking fire smashes him in the face. And now the top of his head is singed like there's no more hair left on like his whole head.
00:37:58
Speaker
And he's just got a blackened rat face and a miniature lion hanging onto it in the back with being stabbed into it. No, no, no, I'm on the other one. I'm on the other one. Yeah, he's the healthier one. Yeah. Yeah. I need this one to survive. And that will bring us to Vexos. I'm going to tell the rat. I'm like, that's what you fucking get. How far away from from the top are we?
00:38:28
Speaker
from where you guys are at now. So wait, I think up another 30. You get me. Did I did? And I skipped over one of the rats. I'm sorry. Next up is on. Yeah. How's Bill? Can't fuck you. So. And you said the other rats like running parallel to my rat. Yeah. Would I be able to like swing out a little bit and kick it?
00:38:57
Speaker
Yeah, you can do that. I would say because you're so close to it. Instead of just doing a to see if you hit roll an athletics check to make sure you don't slip off this other rat. Jesus Christ. Have a really good athletics. And I kind of just want to bite down to secure my foothold on this rat. But I also want to fuck this rat off.
00:39:27
Speaker
You're not fuck a rat. Well, it's right off. Fuck the rat off. Yeah. I said what I said. Yeah, let's fuck this chicken. You know what? Fuck it. Athletics check. Now on 19. Oh, yeah. Oh, how much damage do you do to him? Oh, fucking hell. That scared the piss out of me. I do five damage. So you kick this rat.
00:39:57
Speaker
and he takes some damage. He kind of looks pissed off at you and you look into his beady little eyes and his burnt off face and you just see hatred in his, in his face right now. Yeah. Well, he's a rat. He is looking quite fucked up. I will feast on your corpse once I am big. Oh yeah. These all, all, all these rats are getting it after this.
00:40:22
Speaker
Oh, oh, but I'm the one with the weird one for saying fuck the rat off. You're going to give it to the rats. So he's going to the rat, too, that you just that you just kicked up. He's going to look at you and he is going to try to make a bite at you and completely miss you again. Oh, thank God. It's still got a claw, doesn't it? Yeah. And this time, well, it's really on disadvantage, right?
00:40:50
Speaker
Yeah, and he missed both times. Oh, thank God. The second time he goes to claw at you. He goes to claw at you and he kind of loses his foothold a little bit and completely falls off about 60 feet from the ground and smashes into the ground. His little bitch rat spine crack. Yep, he rolled a gnat. Does he do gravity damage? Oh, yeah.
00:41:17
Speaker
So he hits the ground and you see blood splatter out of his head and he does not move. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck him. I will. How's Todd feel? How's Todd feel about this, Bruce? Todd, how are you feeling? I'm feeling a little a little unsatisfied right now. I mean, that was that was my brother. So.
00:41:46
Speaker
Well, Todd, maybe you shouldn't be more convincing when you told him to back away from us, all right? Nothing bad had to happen. Nothing bad had to happen. This could have been a very amicable situation, but here we are. Well, it's not my fault. No, no, I'm not blaming you, Todd. I'm not blaming you, but your brother can go fuck himself. And next up is Vexus.
00:42:16
Speaker
So how far are we from the top so at this point you guys have made it 60 feet up Which means you guys are about 240 away 30 40 40 away All right, I'm gonna I'm gonna attempt to shoot the grapple gun down to fucking lion man
00:42:44
Speaker
to give him a potential to grab onto the rope. So you shoot it down, and now there's a dangling rope right in front of Axon. Grab on, Lion Man! Reach, Lion, reach! If you guys have seen Jordan Planet, you would know that's a very traumatic scene. And as soon as you shoot this down,
00:43:14
Speaker
The other rat that he's on catches up to your guys, this rat, and you hear it kind of first squeaking over to, uh, to your friend and, uh, they start conversing a little bit. Do I understand this conversation? So you hear one side and you hear him say, please, this is just ridiculous. Just leave us alone. And then you hear him say,
00:43:42
Speaker
Yeah, but like they're riding me. They're not really snacks. And then and at this point, the rat reaches its claw and tries to grab an octifer. And wait, wait, wait, the rat that we're riding tries to grab me. No, my rat. Oh. And I say, how is he like his appendages can't do that.
00:44:10
Speaker
No, no, no, he's just trying to grab one hand out like this one and He goes over to do that and misses and then an angry attempt goes to bite at vexos and It's not too bad
00:44:39
Speaker
Eight. Nine points of damage. Nine points of damage. Oh, oh my. I was joking. Yeah, I was going to be like five. Are you still up? Yeah. Yeah, I'm still up. You got your health potion. Yeah. Oh, you should. You're bro. Oh, this sucks because I just use all my fucking.
00:45:04
Speaker
I dropped the grapple gun. As he bites on. Oh no. He swipes me, I dropped the grapple gun and grabbed my side. You dropped the grapple gun and you just see. Thank God I didn't grab onto that. You just see it start plummeting to the ground and is no longer going to be able to be used. And next is going to be
00:45:34
Speaker
Bruce. Oh boy. Uh, and at this point you guys are like side by side with, uh, with this other rat. Okay. Yeah. I'm, uh, I'm going to cast vicious mockery at the rat. All right. What do you say? Uh, I'm going to be like, yeah, you like that when my little lion friends ride you, huh? You little bitch, huh? You stupid little rat bitch. You said it's a, it's a 13 wisdom save, right? Yeah.
00:46:04
Speaker
So you say that to him, and he looks extremely offended, and he takes whatever damage you just dealt him, and he rolled a 10. That would be a three. Well, three points of damage. And next up is Noctifer. Well, wouldn't you guess, but I'm going to yell at Axon, and hey, be like, hey, get on this rat, man, because that ship's going down, and I'm going to toss a fireball at that rat.
00:46:34
Speaker
Okay. Thanks. I don't even have an opportunity. You just said, Hey, get off the Titanic before they started lowering lifeboats and roll the sea. 13 13. Yeah, that hits 13 his five damage axon.
00:46:58
Speaker
Roll me a dexterity check to see if you can move out of the way a little bit or if you are going to get hit by this fireball. If I get hit by this, this is catastrophic. Well, he's holding on to this rat and you just shot it at at this rat. Yeah, but if he's huge to me, I feel like I'd be able to throw it his face like kind of easily. It's it's fire. I'm definitely in a little bit. I rolled a nine.
00:47:29
Speaker
You've rolled a nine. Okay. You're going to take half damage because you are, you are in the direct, uh, rounded up last, rounded up or down. Oh, is it? Well, when it comes to damage, some, sometimes it's not. And it's, it's dam's call. Yeah. Oh, we'll round down. We'll round down.
00:47:55
Speaker
Yeah, it's it's always rounded. It's actually usually from what I've noticed. It's usually round. I'm sorry. Pokemon is rounded down. Yeah. For for D and D like the. Basically, whatever fucks over the player rounds up and whatever could help us, it rounds down. Yeah, that sounds about right from. Yeah, from what from what I've been. That's how I built my Dark Knight, like the way that I heal, it's rounded down. Yeah, so. It'll it'll round up.
00:48:26
Speaker
Hey, you already said hey, you know, you can still miss you can still miss. All right. Well, we'll go. We'll go. It rounds down now because I fucked up, but it will round up in the future. Sorry, guys. So roll the hit. Yeah, you still got to roll the hit, don't you? To hit, you know, he hit. I had the right way, I guess, like from the on the fur, like just kind of singed you. Yeah. All right. How much damage five?
00:48:53
Speaker
Five, yeah, so he should take two if we're rounding down this one time. I am hanging by a thread. You and me both, brother. You are hanging on by a thread. This rat is now burnt up in his face, and you took a little bit of those flames directly into your face. And now it's Axon's turn.
00:49:21
Speaker
Uh, yeah. Can I like dig in the spear that's in its head a little harder to like, kind of like the dash action, like a really violent giddy up. Yeah. Wrench that shit in there. Like kind of put it into him and like force him like a lever. It's a fucking, it's my shifter. Yeah. Yeah. I'm dropping this bitch into second gear. You can. Uh, I don't even know what that would be.
00:49:51
Speaker
A nature check? Animal handling? Animal handling. Animal handling, yeah. That's a good one. Mod 20. All right. You stab this thing in the back and you maneuver in a way where he is in a lot of pain and he wants to fucking get the fuck out of there and he just starts running up and he'll take the dash action and get up 60 more feet. Let's go.
00:50:18
Speaker
So I just want to point out real quick, guys, the rats taking both rats are going where we want to go. You don't have to attack my rat.
00:50:27
Speaker
They'll both get us there. He keeps attacking us that are on the other rat. We could have the other rat just go away from it. You could hop onto this rat. Why would I do that? I did something really badass to get up here. I earned this. Hey, I'm going to try to take it away from you, but that rat keeps attacking us, and I'm going to keep attacking it. Don't fuck with my rat. Then move the rat away. I did.
00:50:58
Speaker
The next person's turn is this rat. Fuck that rat. And and this rat is going to try to buck off his passenger. Was that a Dex, a Dex, right? It's going to be a Dex save. Saving throw or just check? Saving throw. OK. 14. All right. All right.
00:51:27
Speaker
And he has two actions and he's, or two attacks and he's going to do it again. So one more. Okay. Please beg, please dear God. Oh, let's go 23. He starts bucking and trying to go as wild as possible. And he's fucking moving all over the place, squeaking and freaking out. And you managed to just hold onto them.
00:51:51
Speaker
with this thing stabbed into his back, just fucking riding it out. We hunt much greater than you in in Terra. And next up is Vexus. Vexus. I'm gonna cast Nightshade Cut at that other rat.
00:52:16
Speaker
No, I'm just kidding. I'm gonna fucking, I'm gonna, I'm honestly just gonna start like slightly meditating on the back of this rat. I'm big chilling on the back of this rat. I'm just, I'm asking Bruce and Noctifer, how's their days going? Like I'm in total- He's getting the spins on the back of a rat. He's getting the spins. Yeah. I'm like, I'm like pretty injured and like, I just, you know, just enjoying the ride.
00:52:47
Speaker
All right. So I guess you. All right. That'll bring us to Bruce. Yeah, I'm going to use my action to talk to Todd and Dash. Try to get us closer to that top, so. OK, you got it, boss. Pick it up. Pick it up, man. Come on, you got it. You got it, boss. I'm on my way. And. Oh, dude, fucking dizzy is going to sue us.
00:53:13
Speaker
Oh, no, no, no, no, this character's name is Ricky rat. And he sprints up. And now you again are parallel to this other rep. So so he's my action to dash. Yeah.
00:53:30
Speaker
Yep. So you use your action, action to dash as a bonus action. I'm going to give bardic inspiration to my big lion friend in case he has to fucking, in case he has to check again. So I'm going to use that click the inspired button. What do you say to inspire him? You got it. My big lion friend. I do got it. Thank you. Kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty. I believe in you.
00:53:53
Speaker
So you guys sprint up and now you guys are side by side, about 150 feet away from the top. What do you do? Noctifer. I'm tossing a fireball at the other rat. You're a fucking piece of shit. Oh, my God. Not only could you kill, there is so much that could go wrong.
00:54:20
Speaker
You can hit me? You chose this line, man. No, I chose- I warned you! I warned you! You chose to jump onto this fucking rat. Actually, can I use my Chill Touch instead? What the actual fuck? So, Chill Touch is a ghost hand that reaches out and just takes a swipe at whatever. Okay. Yeah, I'll allow that. Join a role again?
00:54:51
Speaker
No, 18 is fine. Okay. Yeah, it's the same. It's the same plus to hit Except now I'm rolling a d8 This rats so fucking dead six All right, so this hand this ghostly hand comes up swipes across his face and This rat is looking real fucked up now. I mean fuck his eye out with the fucking I just
00:55:17
Speaker
Oh, you definitely like his eyes like popped out. He's got one eye now and he is looking real, real fucked up. And that'll bring us to Axon. We're putting this bitch in third. A 15. Is that going to get me in third? Yeah. Yeah, it seems like the exact amount you needed. So yeah.
00:55:46
Speaker
Let's go another 60 feet, baby. I just dropped my super expensive die. So you run up another 60 feet and it is now the rat's turn and he is going to again try to buck you off two times. OK, so how are we going to work? How is it just going to be like a D4 plus my role? No, so it says here it's you roll.
00:56:15
Speaker
And then before you know if it hits or not, or if it's good or not, you can choose to roll the bardic inspiration. Yeah. You have a point of inspiration. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. All right. But you don't know, you have to wait. Dean, you can't tell him if it's good or not before he uses that die. Okay. Yeah. He's about to use that point. I'm using it. I'm using it. That was an 11.
00:56:49
Speaker
12 keep me on the rat. So he bucks you off. Oh, and you start falling. Can I can I reach out to like grab grab onto the reaction. So I will say you can because you have claws. You can try to stick it into the
00:57:17
Speaker
the chair or I guess the leg of the table that you guys have been climbing up and try to stop yourself. It will be a disadvantage. And it'll be in athletics or strength check. Okay, athletics it is. So glad I rolled another character. Did you already roll another character?
00:57:45
Speaker
I have like four backup characters at all times. Okay, so that one was a 16. Oh, no. That was an 11. I will say you were able to get your claws in a little bit and it does start slowing you down. So as you're slowing down underneath you is still
00:58:14
Speaker
the other rat and they will have an opportunity to try to grab you before you fall. I thought it was just the two rats that came up the desk. Yeah, two of them fucked off. We killed one and I just got fucked off. I'm saying the rat that you guys are on. Oh yeah, because I'm above you guys. Because he dashed up. He's above you. And he tried to catch himself and now he is slowed down a little bit.
00:58:42
Speaker
enough where you guys will have the opportunity to try to grab him if you guys pass a strength. Yeah, can I use my reaction to pick him up or is that gonna be an action? That'll be a reaction. Sorry. So d20 to see if I grab him.
00:59:06
Speaker
Yeah, so it's going to be athletics or acrobatics, depending on how you want to do it. No, I'll take, it's the same for me.
00:59:19
Speaker
16. Yeah. So as he's falling down, you see him slow himself down just a little bit. And you managed to stick your hand out and grab onto his paw. And you're holding him as he's dangling off the side of this rat. That'll bring us Vexos. Yeah. Yeah, I'm gonna let them deal with that.
00:59:47
Speaker
I'm gonna cast Nightshade Cut at the other rat. You're a prick. Yeah, I know. I need you to learn lessons of your choice. His rat's dead. He's not on the rat anymore. Yeah, I know, but the rat's still alive. It just bucked him off.
01:00:10
Speaker
Alright, so read off what I have to do. What does it do? Well, it's Eldritch Blast. It's Eldritch Blast. Yeah, but yeah, I'm assuming a seven does not hit. A seven does not hit. So you shoot it up, it fucking smashes into into the table above you. That's pretty much it. Damn, now you know how Bruce DeBart felt.
01:00:34
Speaker
Amen. Amen. I go back to my zen. And that'll bring us to Bruce, but before Bruce goes, Johnny Phelps looks over at you guys and look, we just need to take out this last rat and then we go up in the top, we're almost there. Do you still have the grappling gun?
01:01:01
Speaker
where's the grappling gun next oh yeah you fucking you dropped it back there oh i thought you brought i thought you brought one too johnny i only have one arm i use that to hold on to rat but your other arm is mechanical no no he only has one arm that is no i have one arm he has no organic arms
01:01:23
Speaker
All that sucks, dude. Why do you think I have not been attacking this entire time? It's because I didn't have arm to do so. Not that the DM forgot about me. Johnny, we're going to have to do this without a grapple gun. All right. That's it. We'll just leave it at that. And that'll bring us to this other rat. Bruce is starting my bad. Yeah. Yeah.
01:01:50
Speaker
So do we get, do we get axon back onto the rat? I'm dangling. Yeah. So axon is dangling off. Okay. Well, I have no strength. I like to imagine I'm just bouncing off the walls. I grabbed him by the tail and just. How close is this, uh, this rat ahead of us? 30 feet, 60 feet. Uh, yeah, it's at this point. Uh, so you guys are moving up. You guys need their dash and get to the same side or.
01:02:19
Speaker
You guys can let it go up 30 feet and it'll be 30 feet below it. Yeah, I'm going to dash. All right. So you fucking tell your little buddy to dash up. Come on, Todd. You got it. I was bouncing and I'll. Okey dokey. And just fucking start spreading up. And that was the noctifer.
01:02:45
Speaker
And you guys are now parallel with this rat who is looking real fucking pissed off at all of you. All right. Uh, can I haul him up as a, as a bonus action? Like, can I bring axon up onto the rat with me? With the help, with the help action that I would presumably give him. Cause I want to get on top or back on the rat too. Yes.
01:03:05
Speaker
Okay, so I'm gonna, yeah, I'm gonna be like, I'm like axon, and I'm gonna bring up onto the rat. I'm gonna be like, hey, hold on to this dude's fur. And then I'm gonna cast Firebolt at this rat. At the other rat, not our rat. Careful, it has my spear. We can get your spear later, 13. If we get it later, it will be the size of a toothpick.
01:03:34
Speaker
I have a spear you can have. Deal. Thirteen hit. Thirteen does hit. All right. Yeah. D10 damage. Ten, ten, ten. Dust this bitch. That's a five. All right. You shoot this fireball again at him. This time he's above you guys and you hit his tail.
01:03:57
Speaker
And about half of his tail just burns off, leaving a really disgusting, burning smell all in the air. And he dropped some some shit out of him when that happened because he was a little afraid and it falls right past you guys. That's fucking nasty. And that will bring us to Axon. I'm going to lick my fucking wounds. I'm just going to sit here and just
01:04:27
Speaker
lick the back of my paw and fucking do this number right here. I am in pain. I also can't do anything from this position, so. That'll bring us. To the rat. And the rats going to look over. At. Yeah, come here, you little bitch. You should have said that. So he looks over at you, goes to bite you,
01:04:57
Speaker
And you're probably going to scream out when his teeth go directly into like your neck trap area and do 14 damage. Okay. Because he rolled in that 20. Cool. That's a dead night. Nope, it's not. There's just no way. Yeah, that hurt a lot. I did. I screamed. And with his second action,
01:05:27
Speaker
Does a 14 hit? No. Okay. Well, the second action, he goes to swipe at you again with his claws and barely misses you. Uh, and then gets focused on waiting for his next move. I am, I am in vain. I am, I am like focusing on not losing consciousness right now. And this will bring us to Vexos. Vexos stands up.
01:05:58
Speaker
He decides that he needs redemption. So, he casts Nightshade Cut. And does a 16 hit. Absolutely. He's a really... Yeah, beautiful. All right, 1d10. It does one damage. There's just no way.
01:06:33
Speaker
So I stand up from this Zen meditation I'm trying to hang on for dear life on the back of this fucking rat I conjure the shadows into this long blade and I send it straight at this rat and I just gave him a really nice haircut. He's got he's got like a fade going up the side of his belly
01:06:57
Speaker
You can't understand rat, but he, he makes some, uh, noises and you can already tell he's saying thank you. And that'll bring us to Bruce. Sweet. Uh, how close are we to the top? So you guys are only 60 feet away. Yeah. Fuck it. I'm going to dash up there.
01:07:25
Speaker
All right. So you guys take the dash action and you get to the top. And now you're all on the top of this desk with this rat, like following right behind you. And that'll bring us to Noctifer. Okay. Well, after we get to the top, I'm going to jump off the rat's back and square up with this rat who was a fucking who bid at me. And I'm going to cast. No, I'm not.
01:07:54
Speaker
I'm gonna use Firebolt. Tried and true. So this rat is still like just up trying to come up to you guys. So he is still on the line and you're like shooting fire down at him. That's fine. It's a nat 20. Oh, fuck me. Hooray. It's about fucking time. This rat has hung the fuck on. Dude, I know.
01:08:19
Speaker
I just get up and I'm like super pissed and I just focus on this fireball. I'm like fuck you. Five. And five. 10 damage. So you go to shoot this fireball at him and as soon as it hits him, his face goes up some flames. His entire body starts catching fire and
01:08:47
Speaker
he slips off the leg of this table. And you see a flaming rat just slowly falling down with a nice fade, falling down to its death. And when it hits the ground, it lands right on top of the other one and splatters. I'm gonna flip it off. I'm gonna say, fuck you and fuck all your friends.
01:09:18
Speaker
Well, thank you very much for all this help. I really appreciate it. I could not have done this by myself. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Make us big again. Yeah, yeah. With a quickness.
Session Wrap-up and Cliffhanger
01:09:31
Speaker
Oh, I will start working. Give me one moment. And he starts going over. He's doing a lot of tinkering, trying to fix all these wires, crossing them off a little bit. And he says, okay, well,
01:09:46
Speaker
I would like you to stand in front of this ray and I will try to press the button and you will get the big. And then if you can press button for me and then I get big. Before he does this, I'm going to look at our rat friend and be like, yo, Todd, what, what say you, you know, you follow us around a little bit, huh? You can tag along now that your family's dead. I don't know if the rest of your family is going to forgive you.
01:10:16
Speaker
Why don't you just tag along? Maybe, uh, maybe we find a different use for you, you know? Yeah. Yeah. Let's be honest, Todd. They're, they're not going to be happy with you. Hey, Todd can't understand you. How long does animal friendship last? Um, it says, uh, be charmed by you for the spells duration. Oh, 24 hours. Okay. Uh, sure. I'll come with you. No problem.
01:10:47
Speaker
sure I can make a bond where this won't matter anymore. Well, I don't think my friends are going to be very happy with me. And my my family is probably not going to let me back in since I just allowed the murder of my brother and cousin. So, yes, I'll tell you now on your brother and your cousin. Yeah, don't worry about it, Todd. They deserved it. Yeah, they didn't want to say why it has a roommate. You know, they didn't want to listen to you. So. Really, it's their fault.
01:11:17
Speaker
Johnny looks over and he's like, all right, this is ready to go. Would you like to stand over here? And he points over in front of the machine and they will walk up to the top and press button. Yeah. All right. That sounds good to me. So you guys all walk over there and is it everybody? Are you taking this mouse with you as well? Yes, everyone. So you stand there.
01:11:45
Speaker
And he goes, one, two, three, and press his button. And instantly you see everything around you starts to get smaller and smaller and smaller. And you look down and you guys are on this desk and as it gets smaller and you realize you're getting bigger, you are now four grown ass, big people on top of the desk and the desk breaks.
01:12:14
Speaker
How big is the rat, Johnny? The rat. Now that it's been brought to a giant size is about the same size of that rock monster that you guys. Yes. This is God is good. All the time. Um. How are the rats or the rats still around us?
01:12:45
Speaker
Other what? The rats. The other rats. Yeah, they're like scurrying around on the floor. You can see them. I'm going to let them wise out. Are they bothering us? I mean, they don't want to fuck with you now that you're big. I'm going to start snacking on the corpse of the one who fell.
01:13:05
Speaker
Oh my God. And you let, let Danwise go get some food. Yeah. I'm going to look at Danwise and be like, see, I gave you some snacks and then I'm going to let him out and let him do his thing. All right. Noctifer, you said you had a spear for me.
01:13:29
Speaker
I asked you earlier if you wanted a spear. You denied me. You didn't want to be a pack mule. Do you want a spear? Now I would. Okay. Yeah, I'll reach inside my little pack. Well, I guess it'd be strapped to my side, because it's too big for a pack. But I'll take my spear out and be like, hey man, yeah, this is all yours.
01:13:50
Speaker
I have spear. Well, uh, I'm going to, I'm going to enlarge Johnny. So he's a normal sized human now. No, no. Yeah. Let's keep him in our little, our little pocket. I'll feed him to families. Hey, did we grab that shrinking ring? Well, did you guys enlarge him or yeah, I'm going to enlarge. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait
01:14:18
Speaker
We from the other room from Johnny's room. There was another she shrinking ray No one grabbed it. Johnny don't grab the shrinking ray and we will make you bigger Oh, hello, thank you very much. I Almost forgot about me and I was going to be stuck there forever No, no, we wouldn't Johnny I will feast on your entrails if you do not go and retrieve that shrinking ray. I
01:14:47
Speaker
I just, I unarmed smack him in the face. Jesus Christ, ow! Johnny. Hey, Johnny, you think you can rewire this machine here that enlarged us to make it a small ray again? I can work on this, yes. Listen, I want you to understand, this is very important, because there's a fucking rock monster outside that's gonna give us a lot of trouble, and if you don't make it a shrinking ray again,
01:15:16
Speaker
We're all going to die. I will eat you. No. First, you will die, Johnny. Yeah, he said we will die. Yeah. But you will die. Well, look, I will do everything I can to make this work again. And do or do not. There is no track. And that is where we end today's session.
01:15:41
Speaker
No, no, no, no, no. All right. Everyone take a quick pee break. Episode five. We're running it back.
01:15:50
Speaker
Thank you for joining us on this thrilling adventure with the Legion of Dice. Our cast includes Zach Balter as Bruce, Matthew Jacobson as an Octopher, Chase Dixon as Axon, Ken Rawlings as Vexos, and myself, Dean Balter as your Dungeon Master. We extend our gratitude to our incredible Patreon subscribers whose support makes this podcast possible. A special shout out to Erin Burke, Austin, Anthony Rego, Erica, and all of our amazing supporters.
01:16:18
Speaker
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01:16:48
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you
01:17:20
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you