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No Showers When I'm Stressed
41 Plays5 months ago
Lance's daughter's new comedy song plus, managing stress, termites, body odor and more. You may be able to find a better podcast but you're still a POS like us.
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Transcript
Introduction: Comedy and Creativity
00:00:00
Speaker
Hey, it's Lance. Welcome to I'm a POS. I want to play a clip of my daughter's new song, Swingers. i yeah She's taking after her dear old dad and writing comedy songs. my yeah And here's a clip of it.
00:00:15
Speaker
I'll play the full song at the end. Fuck yeah. So proud. Fuck yeah.
00:00:32
Speaker
Just a small town in Florida, a place to grow up Met my wife, Darlene, took her in my pickup truck We had two kids, one girl and one boy But as they got older, we weren't feeling any joy Then our neighbor Bob told us If there's a will, then there's a way
00:01:00
Speaker
Now we're swingers, pull out the pineapple. We're swingers, now hanging at chapel. Once a week we go to Bob's with other couples, just like us and trade.
00:01:17
Speaker
If there's a will, then there's a way.
00:01:22
Speaker
We used to chat back and forth quite a bit, but I feel like i've lost you to Wildwood.
Family and Stress Dynamics
00:01:28
Speaker
Oh, is that, are we on? hey Hey, hold on, bro. I'm close.
00:01:34
Speaker
Just kidding, dude. No, we still chat. Yeah, you're not you're not the only one, bud, that's noticed that i've my demeanor's changed since I'm back in the workforce. That's a fucking sweet segue. But yeah, my kid yesterday said, Dad, I want to say something to you, my son. This is the way he talks.
00:01:52
Speaker
I want to talk to you about something. you're ah I notice that you're like angrier and more stressed out since since you've got this business going. and Oh, my God. Yeah. And then I just crushed them with and made it and put it on them like a good parent.
00:02:09
Speaker
Is that um his therapist coaching him on how to confront? It could be. I don't know. he That's just the way he talks. Like he'll say, he like to a fault, he'll say he'll he'll ask a question before he says it. He'll say one question.
00:02:23
Speaker
like he'll, he'll preface things where it looks kind of professional. You're like this little prick, but he said, and then, and then, but he's, he'll do it He's like an open book. And my daughter kind of piled on.
00:02:35
Speaker
And then I was just like, you know, you guys might be right, but you guys have no fucking idea. Like, When to back off. Like if you think that I'm busy or stressed out, you guys are like, let's go for it. Let's pour it on.
00:02:49
Speaker
let's just Let's just drive it through. And I'm like, you got ah you're still kids, I understand, but like you got you're getting kind of old. You got to be a little bit like, oh, he might be busy. Or if I just go, hold on, i don't have time to explain it to you.
00:03:00
Speaker
but But seriously, fucking hold on, and then everything will be fine. and they And two seconds later, because and then some some client hit us up at last night. Two seconds later after we had this talk, my daughter's fucking screaming at the top of her lungs like Mariah Carey as I'm as i'm trying trying to send a message to someone. And then my son started – he's a big question guy, lot of questions. So he was firing about – I don't know. He just was like – what's your favorite like What's your favorite city in France? or what's your It'll just be these random questions where you're just like, I don't fucking know, dude.
00:03:34
Speaker
You know? So you're not the only one that knows my demeanor sucks, but sorry about that, bro. Sorry. did Have you told them that dad is vulnerable?
00:03:44
Speaker
That dad has feelings? have you Have you had the talk as they've gotten older? That dad isn't perfect? No. I'm not doing that, dude. Why not? i'm not gonna I'm not giving them an inch. I'm not telling them dad's not perfect. yeah they They love the the dry, sarcastic asshole response.
00:04:05
Speaker
So they're they're always trying to get me into this. You're getting a little grumpy, huh? I think I'm just, I'm working at home and when I'm here, I'm trying to be with him a lot. So i was with him like five days, but there's always something going on now with this stupid business, which is good. It's not like horrible work, but it'll be like, oh, I'll just constantly get messages from customers or whatever.
00:04:24
Speaker
Or my partner is is always calling me and stuff and and like... It's just these little things. So I could be out. I can i can hang out with them. But then I'm like, i got to take this
Work-Life Balance Challenges
00:04:34
Speaker
call. So i don't I don't sit there every fucking and be like, announcement.
00:04:39
Speaker
I'm now occupied with work for the next 10 minutes. So I'll just start. I'll just fade into whatever I'm doing. They'll be like, that that dad, dad, dad, dad. And I'll just be like,
00:04:51
Speaker
i'll i you know I'll be like, can you shut the fuck up? ah I'll say stuff like that. And then they interpret that as all your little angry. It's like, you guys are fucking modern pussies. That's the problem, dude. Yeah. Well, you know what's good when you're working with other people, kids or colleagues, is to keep it all inside, not set boundaries, not tell them how you're feeling.
00:05:12
Speaker
That always goes over well. Oh, do you think it's a boundary thing? You got to have the talk, but work's important. Dad's only human. Of course I'm doing that, but I put it more on like, you want your shit?
00:05:26
Speaker
You want me to buy you shit? I'm joking, dude. I never did that. Never once did I have a good conversation with my kids before I snapped at their asses. Never once. It was always after.
00:05:39
Speaker
So good for you. They, uh, they're just, what's really, what's funny about all this, what's stressing me out is is like, I've got, I got the trip booked to Colorado with them, but we have a, a container.
00:05:56
Speaker
and so good thing. going to take them to Colorado, see their grandparents and my brothers and see you Chuck Uh, but then we have a container. We ordered ah ah another container of wood.
00:06:07
Speaker
Also a good thing. So we need more wood. But like, I'm like afraid that's going to land when I'm out there with them. I kind of hope it does because we need it. But, ah so all that, that's, what's like stressing me out, which is like the story of your life. You know, when you're doing shit is like, ah, fuck.
00:06:23
Speaker
It's always like the timings always sucks. Always something. You're always like, fuck, I can't go then because of this or I can't. So I don't know why i can't, I'm like reminding myself everything's going to be fine because it always fucking is. I don't, I don't know why sometimes I can't get through my head. So I think that's what they're saying actually.
00:06:41
Speaker
Yeah. Well, how how long does it take to move in the wood? Well, just to get inside if you have enough manpower. I mean, we did it in probably three or four hours last time, but then, then you just have shit everywhere, you know, and then it's kind of like organizing it and and that kind of stuff.
00:06:58
Speaker
And, you know, nothing that we haven't talked about. The business is set up a little weird. Me down here, one guy working, another guy at the shop. But as things go well, we're going to resolve those issues. I just don't, I just think, I hope the next two or three weeks go smoothly. We get the wood.
00:07:13
Speaker
I find a way to get out there for a few days. My parents can hang with my kids. I can still take them skiing, have a good trip. That's what I hope for. Like if the wood came January 4th, I went to St. Louis 4th through, say, 7th 8th,
00:07:26
Speaker
Hung out with them from the 26th through the 3rd until my daughter goes on her trip. So there you go, everybody. Logistics. God damn. But how many people aren't sitting on the same thing?
00:07:39
Speaker
Everybody but me, bro.
00:07:43
Speaker
No logistic issues for you, huh? That's what it takes. That's what it takes to not have this stress. Oh, no. I still have different versions of it. But, yeah, that logistical stress, I hated it the Probably the most stressful thing in my parenting life was feeling like I couldn't cut out of work early for the social pressure of not giving enough and also the social pressure of getting to the daycare center and being late.
00:08:14
Speaker
And that drive, it was about like 24 minutes if everything went well, was the most miserable. That's so funny. Anything more pathetic than the parent late to daycare?
00:08:24
Speaker
Right. It's like you already got them in daycare and then you're, yeah, I just stopped by, i had a few happy hour brewskis. But if you could have put a recorder in the car and just and just like had that and we could play it right now back then, just how I talk to people, other drivers. Yeah.
00:08:41
Speaker
Oh, yeah. What the fuck are you doing? It's like everybody's an old, old bag. Everybody's a fat ass. Everybody's a piece of shit.
00:08:53
Speaker
I've been doing that. That's probably another thing that they're buying into because I do that all the time. But you're literally, like every time you're in the car here, you're behind someone going less than 20 kilometers an hour.
00:09:05
Speaker
What for?
Travel Tales and Cultural Observations
00:09:06
Speaker
Why? It's Costa Rican style? I have no idea, dude. It's like every single time I get in a car. You also have psychopaths driving like maniacs, like motorcycles going by you in between lanes, but you're always behind. Yeah, you so you have old drivers.
00:09:22
Speaker
I don't know. I think it's just the culture of be careful. Or I'm sure some some fucking hippie would be like, Pura vida, it's just a slow life. You're not used to It's like, no. These just people ruining people's days. has nothing to do with that fucking Pura vida. But you have a ah mix. I mean, if I had that, yeah so you have old drivers.
00:09:41
Speaker
I guess they live long here. you have aging drivers, you have shitty roads, you have too much traffic on on an infrastructure, it's kind of old. You have um this be careful societal thing going on. And then you have old shitty cars where some people are like, I'm not putting this thing over 20. This bitch ain't gonna make it.
00:09:59
Speaker
So you'll be behind like a you know like a truck. ah Someone's hauling mangoes or someone's somewhere, but it might be in like a 1965 pickup truck, which is smaller than like your daughter's Prius, but it's a pickup truck.
00:10:14
Speaker
Real recipe for disaster, hu And he's just cruising down the road happy as fuck in the left lane. And what are you doing? Same thing you were talking about. Screaming. Just like, what the fuck are you doing?
00:10:26
Speaker
Are you calling him like... Some racial derogatory stuff? No. Never? Not racial. Okay. I can't, I would. I'm not saying I wouldn't, but I haven't been able to tie the bad driving to a race.
00:10:42
Speaker
there's There is this kind of, I don't know how to explain it, there is a bit of a kind of, like the who gives a fuck attitude. Is part of it. Because you'll just have people like, Costa Ricans love their hazard lights. And they will just pop the, hat they can be in the left lane of a highway. Pop the hazard lights on and just stop.
00:10:59
Speaker
Be like, what's up? Gonna chill here. Take a nap. I swear. Fucking, in like the the entrance of an emergency room hospital, they'd be like, what's the problem? Get my fucking hazards on. Go around, ambulance.
00:11:11
Speaker
it's It's crazy. So there's all there's all there's so much random shit happening. Every time you drive down the road, there's always like just, you're like, what is that person doing? Could you imagine if you shipped in 300,000 American white dudes in their pickup trucks? okay How many murders would there be?
00:11:28
Speaker
We got those guys too, dude. There's something about, I had a pickup truck for a while. i was dope. But there there is something about meatheads in a pickup truck that, we had The Costa Rican has that too. Those guys are always going like 180 miles an hour, like in the other lane, and they're just the most badass, dude.
00:11:46
Speaker
You got to recognize they're badassery. There is that. and But I mean, I would probably lean closer to them. But I mean, I've been down there for so long, I mean, permanently, and then and I still, like an idiot, have hope.
00:12:02
Speaker
that that that I'm going to get somewhere kind of quickly. Yeah, it doesn't happen. Well, business is going well. You're on the grumpy curve where it's starting to pull you in.
00:12:14
Speaker
There's no more like fantasies. It's just reality. Well, there
Coping with Stress: Strategies and Philosophies
00:12:18
Speaker
is this like, oh shit, this is going to go. Yeah. and But that's also like, fuck. well we yeah We need to figure it out.
00:12:27
Speaker
But I mean, that's there's a good problems to have. And, I mean, the other thing that my, i don't know if you remember this, the age of my kids, 14, 12, they just started summer break. It's like everything slows down. And here you get into like some, all the activities, like sports slow down.
00:12:43
Speaker
So they're just sitting around fucking being pieces of shit. And that that also like, you can worry when they're in school, you're like, all right, I can do But then now you're like, they're just here. And at some point there's just not, you know, how many, we we fucking jogged five kilometers yesterday, day three of us.
00:12:58
Speaker
I'm out there, got my kids pounding around the the thing. I'm like, right, what else am I going to do? i was just like, you got to shut the fuck up. Let's go run. Yeah, that there's a huge contrast there. You're you're working.
00:13:10
Speaker
is it Yeah, what do you do? with it like You don't realize how much you rely on school and their activities. Just let them run wild, dude. See what happens. There's nowhere for them to go. Like in the in neighborhood where they live with their mom, they they can run around a little bit. But still, like, I don't know if they do. It's just not the same, dude.
00:13:28
Speaker
Nah. Should we talk about the screen? Nah, let's not do it. The what? Let's not talk about the screen. You taking care of yourself, though, man? You taking care of yourself?
00:13:39
Speaker
How so? I don't know. Handling the stress? Honestly, the job that I do is not, I think, who was I telling, I was telling the sales guy today, I'm like, it's not that bad.
00:13:51
Speaker
Like, when I'm up there, it's kind of fun. I'm just talking shit and talking around. I'm just kind of lonely. Like, I miss my kids and wonderful people in my life, you know, but, but that, the the stress of it is not,
00:14:04
Speaker
it's not getting It's not like that anger stress. when you're Like in some jobs, I guess fucking Ryerson in accounting fucking needs to go fuck him. so So there's battles, but not not too bad. but ah I noticed all of your evil corporate workers are either accountants or inventory managers.
00:14:25
Speaker
In my jokes? are you mean Yeah. yeah Well, you probably have your own set because it's just where you were. True. You had a lot of accountants, huh? I think people, no. Actually, i've never met I've never had, the accountings never fucked with anyone. They're just kind of sitting there doing their work. ah People usually like the bang bang on HR, HR lady.
00:14:47
Speaker
She takes some shit in the world of comedy. I'll tell you what, though. I haven't seen a healthy tax accountant. I mean, physically healthy tax accountant. That's got to be.
00:14:58
Speaker
That's going to be tough because you make all your money in like five months. You're just pounding papers, screens, paper, screens, takeout, takeout.
00:15:09
Speaker
Miserable life, dude. And you're kind of you got to be kind of available around the clock. so you're yeah This is the biggest thing. I mean, I kind of get it. When you start getting busy and the idea like being healthy, eating healthy,
00:15:24
Speaker
is all about time to prepare stuff, right, time to go do stuff to work out. And I could see how quickly it can get away from people. Like, it's not ah it's not a stretch. Even if you're only working like 40 hours a week, it's there's your your thing. just If you're working more than that, then it's like, what are you going to do You going to go the gym 11 o'clock at night, some shit? Are you going to you know, if you have a family, you're going fucking wake up and, you know, go out to your garden and tend to your kale and harvest that?
00:15:55
Speaker
Well, you're probably gonna get your anxiety kicked up like I did and fucking be pacing around in the middle of the night, walking like three miles in your basement, fucking 2 a.m. Because you don't have enough time.
00:16:08
Speaker
So you wake up stressed, pissed. that was for That was for exercise you were doing that or anxiety? It's not for exercise. Things were piling up on me, piling on my shoulders, the weight of the world. And I needed to to calm myself down in the middle of the night.
00:16:24
Speaker
just thought you were getting your steps in. No, not on purpose. No, but my capacity to move is so high. You know, it takes, just takes ridiculous amounts of bullshit to to calm my nervous system.
00:16:36
Speaker
What was it? Does it take physical? does it take? Physical? Yeah. Physical. You can't mentally work around it or anything?
00:16:48
Speaker
its just If I get to and a level of agitation and stress that's really high, I need that i need some extreme physical stuff to calm it down. like I know other people use other things. like They can read.
00:17:00
Speaker
But when I get to that level, my my body will like reverberate. It's sort of saying to me, escape this fucking situation right now. Start sprinting. I don't care where you're going. Just start sprinting.
00:17:13
Speaker
I mean, I think that's great as a coping mechanism. It's probably one of the healthier ones. But not at 3 in the morning. No, and to get to that level of agitation, there's something missing in between. There's an interpretation or a framing of what's happening in the in your life that's maybe a little overblown, you know, whether it's stresses with the kids or work.
00:17:35
Speaker
I'm trying to just get, this is my technique, which has got some holes in it. But I'm just literally being like, just whenever you start getting stressed, just remind yourself that there's nothing to worry about.
00:17:47
Speaker
Everything will be fine. But you know that's not true. No, know it is true. You know it too. Sometimes there is though. Well, what's the worst that's going to happen?
00:17:58
Speaker
Something that's going to happen. The worst thing is death. And that's going to happen. Well, sure. I mean, i don't know many people that sit there and ponder, well, I could die. yeah oh well, but like I will,
00:18:10
Speaker
I will move past the work stresses or the things that could go wrong like you're your wood doesn't show up and you've already flew into St. Louis and the ship got stuck or something. Who cares, right? You you can work past that. But I go right to, past that right to, did I leave the gas on?
00:18:30
Speaker
Is there radon flooding our basement and killing my kids? When I'm in those places, when I'm in those like heightened states of ah that' thought anxiety and stress.
00:18:40
Speaker
that has Have you had a traumatic experience where where like something happened? Ever? You can point to? You're like, it must be because I... I don't know. I just think it's wiring.
00:18:52
Speaker
I think it's threat response. You think you're you're up? like I don't know. like It always seems like everything comes back to your parents. like Do you think your parents somehow subconsciously or consciously like made made you an anxious person?
00:19:08
Speaker
No, no, I think it's just a wiring. Like if you ever watched, because we lived up in the mountains, you ever watched deer? Just how hypersensitive they are to everything. I just think certain people are more in tune.
00:19:20
Speaker
Like a deer? That's funny. when When I'm in that space, yeah, it's almost like being out there naked in the wild. Someone shouts a car door, you immediately sprint like six miles.
00:19:32
Speaker
Yeah, and i will I will be in a mode at times where we'll walk in certain places and I'll be threat assessing the environment. Just like, oh, yeah, okay, if somebody has a gun, where do you go? And I'm not there all the time, have no needs, but.
00:19:45
Speaker
I am, I can move in that direction. So, so there, but there is a spinning that can happen in the brain that can take you to place where no, in that instance, not everything isn't fine.
00:19:56
Speaker
And I think part of it has to do with maybe my imagination is is sort of a, it's, it's actually a limiter from a mental health perspective, create some melancholy and anxiety.
00:20:07
Speaker
Well, maybe this is a better way to say it. Cause you're right. Everything's not always fine. Yeah. But maybe my, like, with this whole thing that's kind of stressing me out is like, is the container going to land when I'm, whatever, in the mountains of my kids? Or, like, maybe the starting point, at least, I will say, shouldn't be, fuck, this might go wrong.
00:20:27
Speaker
Like, that's probably, like, what stresses me where I'm like, why am I, what I'm trying to tell myself is, why are you why are you fucking stressed? It's like, it's not that everything will be fine, but it's like, you don't, there's you don't have to start there, assuming that it's going to fuck everything up. It might it might be fine, so...
00:20:44
Speaker
you you got You can worry about it or or be updated on what's going on, but you can't just be like, oh, fuck, this might be terrible. It's like, yeah I'm trying to do that. I'm not that prone to it. like that I'm not usually like, oh it's going to suck, but it's enough where something like this is just in the background. So you or my kids might be like, oh, he's preoccupied with something It's like that.
00:21:04
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think, yeah, awful. I'll figure it out. I've done hard things. i'll do I'll be able to figure it out again, no matter what happens, that
Perfectionism and Work Stress
00:21:13
Speaker
kind of thing. that That helps me too. But you know it's just more of the middle of the night behavior that I've really found absurd in my life, which is like- Is that gone, by the way? I think you said that's gone, right?
00:21:24
Speaker
Or no? It's pretty much gone, yeah. I've so i've had a few, you and the last a couple of times, maybe the last three years, but not many. But like ah you know back in the day, I'd be like,
00:21:36
Speaker
get up, have to write on a sticky note, gotta email Steven and let him know that coffee could happen 10 minutes later. And most people would just be like, you know, nothing's going to happen if I show up a few minutes late for coffee with Steven.
00:21:51
Speaker
and then And then I'll just pile onto it. Oh, gotta mention to Bob, we gotta talk to ah Mary about the fucking interface that's ah not, you know, whatever the fuck.
00:22:01
Speaker
Bob and Mary. It seems like there's something behind it. Like, I can't imagine you were that stressed about the meeting with Bob and Mary. Well, there's a perfectionism. Yeah, and there's a perfectionism. I didn't think that. That's that's interesting.
00:22:16
Speaker
I was thinking it's more like behind it. was kind of like, what the fuck am I doing here? But you were engaged. You were all in at that for these things. Yeah, I am usually pretty sensitive to team environments where like I don't like to let people down. It's more of a perfectionist tendency, quality, that it's just freeing to let that go for a little bit.
00:22:39
Speaker
You think Bob and Mary and everybody else that recognize that? Were they like, oh, here this nutcase, our man, he's always crushing. or They never saw it. outwardly They didn't see it. I didn't see mean, a really in-tune person would probably say, damn, once a week you look pretty fucking ragged, like you didn't sleep.
00:22:56
Speaker
But otherwise you're perfectly great and you get everything done. And I would always you know i'd blame it on the kids or something. And sometimes it was a kiss, to be honest. but you plant You try to like...
00:23:07
Speaker
play it off as something dope. you like high They were like, why didn't you sleep last night? You're like, you know why. You're high-fiving them and shit to play it off. Yeah, yeah I did that a lot. You just leave it open-ended but imply.
00:23:22
Speaker
Yeah, but the stress thing is tough. I think it is tough for so many people. The modern world does not kind...
00:23:28
Speaker
It's sad that like, we all have it, but also like, I mean, I feel a little bad and about just being like, you gotta shut the fuck up, like talking to them like that. Or like, I can't believe you, but they they don't they know that's what I am, but still.
00:23:45
Speaker
Well. they just think it's so They just think it's so funny to fuck with me, to get me to to essentially do some sort It's almost like I'm doing a stand-up routine, like of ah a comic bitching about the world.
00:23:58
Speaker
But I'm not doing routine, but they're just like, they're just sitting there laughing. Because i had like Sophia, my daughter is like, you don't you don't answer me sometimes. I'm like, you know why Sophia? Because you're not, you don't listen at all. Like she'll just be like, what? She'll ask a question and then you'll answer and then wait, what?
00:24:15
Speaker
and yoga And then I'm just like, nope. Uh-uh. not repeating so much like dad, dad, dad. And then I'll be like, I just told you what you you answered. It's like, why I don't understand what happens between the time you ask the question and when I answer it, how you lose interest or fade off into something somewhere else.
00:24:34
Speaker
She's like, well, you should you should talk to my friends. They all say that I never hear anything. And then I'm like, I bet you she has, like, there's something there. She has a problem. She has a problem, yeah. if i like I don't want to get too modern ADD type shit, but like there is like a like sometimes she'll like lose focus real quick in a conversation.
00:24:55
Speaker
Yeah, but yeah. It's not my fault, Lance, is what I'm fucking saying. Yeah, dude. It's their ass, dude. But look at all of how how genetically diverse we are. We all have some problem.
00:25:07
Speaker
mean, yours is you know whacking off at work and whatever else you do. but Yeah, during the podcast.
00:25:16
Speaker
got one arm down there, guys. One arm down there doing something. I have two screens to work with here. so I think we're exposed to too much of the right way to do things, the optimal way of doing things.
00:25:30
Speaker
I actually got triggered today listening to some guy i talk about health. was a night It was a sweet little 35-minute podcast about what Americans are eating. It's all the stuff we talk about.
00:25:41
Speaker
But you can really feel outside the lane Right. In anything. Well, was it did you agree with him or is it like, oh, here's another guy selling, pushing some fucking thing? No, this is very scientific, very logical. It's like something easy for me to agree with. I'm just saying you can really get outside the lane of what you're supposed to be doing in your mind. Like this idea that you started a business out of Costa Rica that is technically headquartered in St. Louis. is it's It's tough.
00:26:14
Speaker
You're outside the lane of normalcy there. right You're going to have some stress and nobody's validating that. but That's true. i don't feel I don't feel like I can say that though because i because i you're like, well, you not you, but it's like, oh, I put myself in this situation so I can't really complain about it.
00:26:34
Speaker
Yeah, but you can because you're human. Well, it's like, yeah, but it's just like, well, why'd you do that? I'm like, oh, yeah, it's crazy. I got travel up to this place. and But I mean, that the the answer is like, why did I do that? Because I saw an opportunity and it's turned out to look like it might we might it might be right.
00:26:52
Speaker
And based on the incomes you've earned in the past, what opportunities actually exist locally? Right. Well, yeah, it would have been something like this locally or, you know, ah a risk.
00:27:03
Speaker
I was at a point where I probably needed to like take a risk or move maybe, you know, like go back to the U S or something like that or work like a foreigner work 70 hours a week, like managing a, you know, be like running a whole manufacturing facility or something like that.
00:27:23
Speaker
Like just a nightmare, just everything, just a pure nightmare. Just how? To make 80 grand or something. don't know. Shit or get off the pot.
00:27:35
Speaker
Right. yep Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel like it's... I feel fine about the whole thing. I just i also know that... We'll figure it out. I mean, we're going to need more people up there, not because I'm down here, but because it's a business. So, you know, we need like, that we sell more tables, people need to build them.
00:27:56
Speaker
We, all that kind of shit. So, and so it's kind of like just grind, just grind and ah and that'll happen. And there's already things in place that are happening. It's really just this like little blip of stress about the next three or four weeks.
00:28:11
Speaker
And I don't know why. like we get We can get hyper-focused on stuff. like the whole The whole thing with the container is just kind of stressful. Because then that you're going to open it up. I pick the wood. Or is it going to get there, all that shit. And then people are going to be like, what what' do you got for? it's like Termites, all kinds of crazy shit.
00:28:29
Speaker
termites did sing that video of us eating termites when i was when i took my son on that waterfall hike yeah there's these termites you can eat they and the guys like they taste like carrots this was all in spanish of course but i'm not gonna fucking it you know make you feel like a dumb gringo so i'll do it in english but uh yeah he's like it tastes like carrots and you're just like shut the fuck up dude They don't taste like carrots.
00:28:56
Speaker
Well, even if they do. No, they taste exactly like carrots. But even if they do, you're still popping this live fucking bug in your mouth. It's bizarre.
00:29:07
Speaker
No, you're popping like thousands of them. They're like tiny or hundreds maybe I should say, not thousands. Yeah, they're just what they're just moving around like little little critters, and then you throw them in the mouth, and all of a sudden it's like it tastes like carrots in my mouth.
00:29:21
Speaker
And you feel them moving in your mouth? I think they must drown quickly something with all your saliva maybe. I'm not sure how it works. Yeah, you don't feel them like crawling down your throat or anything. Yeah, I didn't even think i didn't even think about that But now now that does seem like the logical answer what you just threw up like are they just in your body just fucking having a party?
00:29:41
Speaker
Well in your mouth chewing on them your acid the acid in your stomach will kill them Probably even down your throat. I don't know i don't anything about the human body, but like that's let me give you just an American pussies I'm question for you by the way.
00:29:55
Speaker
Yeah, American pussy would say to that fuck that There would be one dude who's who's like fucking, yeah yeah, I'll do it. There's always that one geek American. I'll fucking cliff dive.
00:30:10
Speaker
Yeah, I'll do a shot. Yeah. That dude would do it. Yeah, he'd do it twice. ye ah Fuck that guy. You would do it, though. If you were in the situation I was forced to be in, you would do I'd have one.
00:30:26
Speaker
And I'd kill it before it got in my mouth. I don't know how you if you could. They're that small? They're like little maggots, right? Smaller than, let's go to the video. Smaller than, um they're smaller than like ants, this particular breed of termite.
00:30:42
Speaker
Great. I'd just kill one. And then I'd take the little micro body and throw it to my mouth. And I wouldn't even know it was there. And I could say termites Would you, ah i well I'm all like, I was impressed though. I've always wanted to be, maybe just too lazy to be the type of person that knows all that shit. So I could just go out loud and be like, Oh yeah, these, yeah but I can't, I can't get there.
00:31:05
Speaker
Yeah, I had the instinct when we moved up the mountains to to like explore that, but I just didn't know what would drive it further. like What would propel you through an initial curiosity into like actually taking action to like stay out without a tent in the middle of the woods at night and forage and eat bugs.
00:31:26
Speaker
yeah I'd have to either believe in the forthcoming apocalypse or... world wars or something that was eminent in order to motivate me to get there. How far did you get into it?
00:31:39
Speaker
I got into watching Naked and Afraid a little more than I wanted to and maybe yeah far as far as I got. Are you pretty close? Like, could you survive? All right, here's a video. so Yeah, so these things are on a these things are on a stick that's like like a very tiny stick, maybe almost like a toothpick, and they're crawling around on that.
00:31:59
Speaker
It's a branch that we we took from the forest. Are they crunchy? ah No, I don't think so. I don't fully remember. I just remember that the guy was like, they taste like zanahorios.
00:32:13
Speaker
which is carrots, and I'm like, we're just like, whatever, Abraham, whatever, bro. And then they fucking tasted it. Yeah, they tasted like carrots. He liked it. It's good.
00:32:24
Speaker
Yeah, so it was pretty sweet. But ah anyways.
Adventures and Aging Reflections
00:32:28
Speaker
Did you shower after that? yeah Funny you should ask that, ah We did not shower. We didn't shower up there.
00:32:39
Speaker
You know, I think I went, dude, i'm I'm not, I can't, I think I might have gone, right now, i might have gone like a week without showering. is ah That's got to be an exaggeration. A week? It's not.
00:32:51
Speaker
I don't, well, no. When did I get home? What day is it? 16th? So I'm not sure if I've showered since I got back to Costa Rica. Maybe once. And I got back on the 10th, right? Yeah.
00:33:03
Speaker
Oh, did I? I showered before. Okay. So it's it wass like Thursday's last time I showered showered before my son's graduation. Thursday morning. Thursday morning. not evening. So that's that's Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday.
00:33:17
Speaker
That's five days, working on five days. Now, but you were were you in a body of water? Aren't there like little ponds you can jump in with with leeches? I did not go to swim in any ponds. I did go surfing.
00:33:29
Speaker
was in the Pacific Ocean. What day was that? That was sad Saturday, Friday and Saturday. friday Friday afternoon, i was like, let's let's head down. So we went down to Hermosa Beach. We surfed and we stayed down there.
00:33:42
Speaker
i was going to take a shower at night. Didn't happen. ah So you're two days in. You're really two days in because you're in the ocean. There's lot of salt in there cleaning you up. You think that counts? Because a lot of people like to wash themselves off. But I felt like I was smelling my, when was it? I felt like I was smelling myself one of these days and then it went away. Like what happens to body odor?
00:34:03
Speaker
There's got to be like a cap on it. does it just get progressively worse? It has to stop. And do we have the ability to like, does it go away? Do you know this, Lance? You just said you don't know much about the human body. I wonder, huh? Because I think it's just bacteria in there. Maybe if you sweat enough, it like kills the bacteria.
00:34:21
Speaker
No, maybe it didn't go away. I've also worked out pretty hard the last three days. Yeah, the fact that you're not showering and you're sniffing your armpits on this podcast is fucking hilarious. No, i need it i need I need to get some work done.
00:34:33
Speaker
This is the melancholy of Wildwood, bro. bringing you down no but you don't smell because i smell i can smell probably 24 hours i'm i'm ready to fucking get away hour well yeah i can i'll start but you're a sweater dude but isn't sweat cleansing though i don't know you know yeah i'm just saying you you're a you're a heavy sweater right yeah but isn't it okay so i shouldn't smell is that what you're saying No, um I'm just saying you probably feel like there's something about being sweaty that triggers humans to think they need to clean themselves. And so you if you're saying you're always ready to clean yourself, i think it's because you're you're you're sweaty and you work out a lot and shit like that.
00:35:14
Speaker
Does your face get oily? I will wash my face sometimes, but nothing... Oh, okay. Nothing... Not really. I mean, dude, I'm really not doing a whole lot. If I if i don't shave, then my face might get a little irritated and break out. Yesterday, there was some some fucking happened. Like, half the town where I live but had no water from, like, 8 a.m. m to 11 at night.
00:35:35
Speaker
But do you put on sunscreen and stuff like that? Lotion? Probably not lotion down there. not I use lotion, but no oh not really sunscreen. Yeah. Not day to day.
00:35:46
Speaker
probably should. Sunscreen usually gets me in that shower boy-y.
00:35:51
Speaker
What's, yeah. Because I'd be doing my sprints. Need to put that on the face. are you Are you going shower after every workout immediately? I just worked out. I was going to shower and I was like, yeah, I'm hungry. I'm going to go. And then now here I am doing this.
00:36:05
Speaker
And then the question is, am I going to get up after this and go ahead and clean myself? I think I am. But. It sounds like a a health check of some sort. Some sort of like wellness check.
00:36:19
Speaker
What do they call it when somebody's like, not doing well. What do the police call it? I forget. Yeah. Or they go, they go like show up and they're like, yeah.
00:36:30
Speaker
Uh, I just wonder, I would like to, where does it go? It's like, it doesn't seem like we just progress progressively keep smelling worse and worse. I can't imagine just putting water on yourself is is enough, but maybe it is.
00:36:45
Speaker
But there is a lot of shit out there that's like, we shower way too much, we soak way too much, it's not good for us. Because think about it, like for most of humanity, no one was fucking cleaning themselves this much.
00:36:56
Speaker
Yeah, and they died early, but I don't really know. you read the Old Testament, dude, people are living there like 875. Oh, Okay. I've heard, yeah, I don't change your sheets so much, but, you know, I just, the sunscreen is not something I want to keep on my face.
00:37:12
Speaker
Because of the smell or because cause all the toxic chemicals in it? It's just greasy. You got to get that tallow sunscreen. It's like tallow and zinc. It's like animal fat with cow fat with zinc.
00:37:26
Speaker
God. Try that, bro. God. It's okay to have a few processed things in your life, okay? i think
00:37:38
Speaker
Don't forget, you're you're huffing that varnish. You're huffing that varnish, okay, that you're putting on the wood. I'm not even back. I'm not even close to it. Okay, well, you're you're exposed to gays doing interior design.
00:37:55
Speaker
That's one step away from AIDS. That's processed food at its worst. ah Not as much as I would have liked, by the way. don't it's just St. Louis or what, but I thought I'd be i'd be hanging out all these fun gay guys. None.
00:38:09
Speaker
Yeah, because it's St. Louis. Have you ever heard of a a gay guy say, ah, I just came out of the closet. Now I need to move to St. Louis? Hell no. I have well i um't haven't heard that, but I but i am i am friends with gay men in St. Louis. There's like a gay area there and shit, kind of like Cheeseman Park.
00:38:28
Speaker
It's like 11 people. 11 people. Well, it's kind of a hub for... You're in the Midwest and like a lot of farm, smaller farm towns, Central Illinois, Missouri...
00:38:39
Speaker
west tennessee ohio you're like you're probably gonna end up like chicago or st louis unless you bolt to the coast you know if you're gay not like you're out in the middle of farming community and they're just like yeah whoa yeah yeah there was a term i don't want to stay on this too long because there's other things to talk about but there was a term that always made me laugh gaydar yeah Like, you know, the guy knows.
00:39:06
Speaker
Mm-hmm. He Mm-hmm. Gay. My gaydar is broken, dude. that That's a good one. Does the gay gay men have gaydar we all do? I don't. I think gay men do.
00:39:18
Speaker
But I thought the term was funny. You're acting like it's part of the past. I don't think so. What you mean part of the past? I think it's still out there. Everybody in use, gaydar.
00:39:29
Speaker
ah Oh, the term? I don't know, man. I'd have to go to St. Louis to find out. Don't you think people like to come up with that shit is are like the real geniuses. Like at some point someone was like, my radar, oh, I mean my gaydar. Someone was like, damn, dude. It's very creative of you to come up with that.
00:39:52
Speaker
It is amazing. If you could do some sort of origin study to figure out who the first motherfucker was to say that, it would be great. I think my friend Kevin was the first person to use crush. He was using crush like right when I first got St. Louis. Oh, wait. And now everyone says, oh, he crushed it. i crushed it.
00:40:11
Speaker
It was him. Nobody says crushed anymore, dude. The youngins don't say that shit. Well, no one cares about them. But the... the the yeah
00:40:24
Speaker
he crushed it i heard someone say that i heard someone famous say that uh what was it it was like yeah and then he just went out and crushed it it was probably an older person you maybe like an older athlete talking about a game or or something don't know bobby f flay i don't know something like that yeah he crushed it let's get to my birthday it's your first podcast as a 50 year old dude
00:40:52
Speaker
So i want to I want to tell you this. I don't i don't have no... but so I would like to get to your birthday, but I would like to make it about me. So before we do that... That's been mostly about you. what i These are the shows that you love where I'm out there pouring my heart out.
00:41:08
Speaker
ah I don't have any problem thinking about my own age. I'm about to be a big four nine on Saturday. By the way, i yeah it's it's been pretty good, the the co-parenting, but...
00:41:22
Speaker
I would normally Thursday night with my kids and then I was asked, oh, can I, can they hang out with me? I'm planning a little Christmas party some friends. Okay, great. I said, but I'll see them on Saturday, right? Which is my birthday. No, we have another party.
00:41:33
Speaker
And I was like, what? And I put, I just said, really? was like, yeah, it's my week. It's my weekend with the kids. Right. And then I went, yeah. And then I knew, but I knew she had forgot, but I just said, yeah, but normally we were pretty cool about planning birthdays and shit. And then,
00:41:49
Speaker
She was like, you know, obviously like, oh shit, I'm so sorry or something like that. I'll cancel it. But I was like, ah, that was that was definitely a moment of like, I don't know, like it's over, but but just more like, going to be like, you guys have been fucking separated for for three years, dude. But but ah it was I was just like, wow.
00:42:07
Speaker
Yeah, that's like a real signal of some some distance. Yeah, but she was like, I didn't forget your birthday. I just, my friends were planning something and I just said, they said Saturday and I said yes, so I'm really sorry. and I'll take care of it.
00:42:20
Speaker
But it was just like, what? But I didn't like it because i I know it was an innocent thing, but it put me in a position now that I got to be like, well, it's my fucking birthday, which I really don't care about. but i But, you know, I don't like the kids probably should hang out with me on my birthday.
00:42:34
Speaker
So, anyways, that's sidetrack. That's what it's all about me. But I did want to say, so I don't care about my, I'm turning 49 and it doesn't, that, like, my own age doesn't bother me. It's fucking weird to me that, like, you... and my brother and other people around me, their age.
00:42:49
Speaker
that That's like, it it sounds, when I go, by I'm 49, it's like, who gives a fuck when you go, oh, my friend Lance, who I consider young, is 50, and I'm like, that's weird. So I don't know if you get that, but it's not like, it's never like a personal thing. It's always like the people around you. You're like, what? You're like, I remember l LA when he was breaking collarbones on the football field.
00:43:12
Speaker
I just can't believe he's 50 now. That's what it is. I'm not sure I understand, dude. What I'm talking about? Well, I don't understand why there's an external focus there and there's more of an internal like my age, my birthday.
00:43:29
Speaker
What does that mean? It's more of like, ah I'm fine. i don't know about these fucking old bastards. I don't know. It's not that. Well, the other thing is I don't like i don't see you as an old person at all. and So I'm like, it's weird to be like, his fucker's 50.
00:43:44
Speaker
But it's in the same. I don't see myself as an old person. It's like, this fucker's 49. It sounds weird. But it's like, It doesn't, my own age doesn't really seem, bother me too much, but it's weird to me that like, cause I don't, I don't consider myself in this age group, but then you were just, but you and my brother and whoever our friends are turning 50 that you're just validating that I am in this age group. And I'm like, what?
00:44:06
Speaker
Yeah. Well, is it I don't think people do it, do anymore. I feel like Sarah, fond ki me yeah, well, my wife and I are one of the few people I know that are actually like, oh, talk about getting older, actually acknowledge it. Part of it's because of her profession working in the Jero psychology world with older people. But like lot of people, really, it's all about kicking it and being young and coming across young and not really acknowledging the milestones, the physical ailments. Wearing bad religion jeans. it's like Mostly dudes are that way too.
00:44:41
Speaker
Yeah, dudes dudes are really resistant to it. But women will get into the menopause thing and that like sort of shakes them. Pretty alarming. Once they come through that, then they're just like, ah, let's go gardening. It's all good. good. But they have that to contend with. We don't really have that.
00:44:56
Speaker
That's my question though. Do we? Do you know anything about that? I know we don't have a menstrual cycle. least I don't. Like, do you think we go? but we must There must be some change.
00:45:08
Speaker
I don't know, dude. I wish I was a doctor for you. It's not as pronounced as what women go through, but there's got to be some. Or maybe its just a gradual failure. know. The closest thing I've got to it is like having to retire from basketball because my knee was just like, no more, buddy.
00:45:25
Speaker
Or getting injured pretty much. That fucking happened when you were young. Yeah, but. You just got wise. You just were like, fuck it, I'm going to pound my way through it. And then after while, you're like, yeah, fuck this. I don't know, dude. There's no comparison to playing seven games in a row and jumping in my early 20s up and down, up and down, hundreds and hundreds of times too.
00:45:49
Speaker
Two jumps now and going, fuck. I understand. Yeah, come on. so So other than that, I'm not sure. you know ah can't eat as much rich food maybe.
00:46:01
Speaker
drinking doesn't sit with me the same. That's about it. but you you Yeah, so you think, i don't know, maybe it is age related. That just seems like where you just learned a lot about yourself and you're like, what am i I, this fucking sucks. It's like you might have learned that when you were young.
00:46:19
Speaker
But ah either way, it's still like weather we like it's still a number and you just And did you get, you didn't, you said i everyone was going to take it, take it easy on you and and no fucking party or bullshit, but you were going to go out to eat. Did you at least have to fucking listen to the waitresses sing or some shit that like any, any sort of, sort of awkward shit happened big five The only thing was this, my critical mind got the better of me.
00:46:46
Speaker
There was this, you know couple date about a table away. And one of the guys was, came across, he's super fucking loud. He just, you know and had opinions about everything. It was just like a big, loud fucking laugh. And he was like, oh. What you got understand about Elon is he doesn't even really want to do Tesla anymore. He's all about SpaceX. And um it's like that loud. and And it's already a very loud restaurant. and I just couldn't. You know how I am. I couldn't stop pointing that guy out. and Who are you with?
00:47:20
Speaker
I was with my wife and and Sheila, who's been on the podcast, because her birthday is like a day later or two days later. yeah But i just couldn't stop pointing him out. Here he goes again. oh yeah. Okay. Listen up, guys. He's got something important to say. And then his wife next to him was so miserable. just like She looked so miserable with the other couple.
00:47:39
Speaker
And he he seemed to be vibing with the other couple. And they were really laughing about him. But like I just couldn't stop. like Oh, yeah. Yeah. She's been listening to that bullshit forever. So that hijacked me for a while. But no, i didn't get any, I didn't get singing. I got, they they brought some desserts, but because it's, I'm 50 now, it's too rich. It was like little fudge things that didn't eat.
00:47:59
Speaker
ah Your wife wasn't like, hey, he's fucking birthday 50. Or she did. It's just a more discreet restaurant. that It wasn't even Hooters. Is that what you're saying? No, we were a nice place. And then the next time we went out to like an American place. And so some one of the moms, it's like a post-basketball game thing, ordered me a chocolate cake.
00:48:19
Speaker
So that was I got that. That was a little surprise. Again, rough on the tummy. Oh, yeah, rough on the tummy all weekend. They went to my mom's, and her cooking is just straight up sticks of butter.
00:48:30
Speaker
So i was I was a mess on Monday, just a mess. Welcome to 50, stomach. hu Yeah, but no, not nobody did anything that would embarrass me.
00:48:43
Speaker
I'm surprised that your mom didn't get jacked on the 50. Like, oh, my baby's 50 or anything like that. She's not that type person. Because that seems like it would actually get a mom going as much as it would yourself.
00:48:54
Speaker
No, no. I got a cool painting my my daughter did of all my albums. Oh, wow. And she did that painting. It's like a ah ringer for the covers of all the albums. And then my wife got me a puzzle with all these picture memories.
00:49:11
Speaker
So it's like, you know, in the winter, I like to do a little puzzle here and there, Matt. But it has all these pictures. I think you're on one of them too, buddy. You might be on a couple of them. There's these little frames. Younger days?
00:49:23
Speaker
Or maybe the most recent, maybe our our seniors ah picture? It might be that one. That's a pretty good one. My son wrote me a big letter. Dude, that's um that's like one hell of a family.
00:49:35
Speaker
Almost pretentious, I would say. It was so perfect. just the creativity and the gift giving. It's like, fuck, dude. Take it easy. So a heartfelt painting of a puzzle that put some time and effort in organized and then a letter? Jesus Christ. And a new backpack. And then my dad came through, bro.
00:49:53
Speaker
Came through with some 1975 candy, retro candy box full of all sugar babies, whatever, you name it, buddy. Was that all because of the the date, you were the year you were born? One of those gifts?
00:50:07
Speaker
That's pretty
Milestone Birthday Reflections
00:50:08
Speaker
sweet. yeah who Who do you think put that together? Who's the creative energy behind that? Is it him, you think, or? or Wild retro candy in St. Louis. You guys should connect.
00:50:21
Speaker
Is it really? That sounds like something that people would love in St. Louis, I'll tell you that much. Yeah, they would. They don't call it retro in St. Louis, i they just call it what they still do. There's a lot shit, a time machine there.
00:50:34
Speaker
Dude, that's impressive. Yeah. You can't complain about any of that shit. Even from your your fucking woke ass, like nothing nothing like they bought your, 50, new Audi something stupid.
00:50:48
Speaker
Or even like we're going to ah Paris some shit like that. That'd be cool, but still. Wow, dude. Well, congratulations. Yeah, man. But all that's like what you expect from that crew every year, or was there a little more effort because of the big 5-0 you feel like?
00:51:06
Speaker
Or had nothing to do with your age? Probably a little more thoughtfulness. like Because we're going to go do a trip because her birthday will be in July. We'll do a trip then.
00:51:18
Speaker
i' i don't even I say that because of the pressure in America. What are you doing? what are you doing? And I got to be like, well, we're going to go, Hey, slow down. We're going to go on a fucking trip in in July. Cause my wife's birthday is that too. Okay. Just slow down. We're going to trip, buddy. We're going to fucking trip. Okay.
00:51:36
Speaker
That's what I feel like. And and the, fail like, Oh yeah. You can see that look of like, Oh, hurtz that's fair. You're failing. Yeah. Yeah. You're not going to Europe. When I turned 50, we went to Europe. My other friend, he went to fucking Fiji. Yeah. We're just, you know, real I've always wanted to go there. It's like my 50th and fuck.
00:51:53
Speaker
so that Only a few years ago, I remember near the end, but it was our anniversary. And and my wife like always has stomach problems. and like every Every place is like an issue. But she also, for some reason, she has issues with like American chains and all that kind of shit. And was always like, ah, these fucking places. But she always liked P.F. Changs.
00:52:18
Speaker
Really? There's not as a place that doesn't fuck my stomach up more. Yeah, well they they have something like lettuce wraps or some shit that she can use. But it doesn't matter. they They came down here, pf Chang's.
00:52:31
Speaker
And we had, I think it was a year we, I mean, I might have when we went, we're going to Europe and all this shit. But I remember like three or four of our friends, not that close friends, but some friends what are for anniversary? I was like, I think I'm taking her to P.F. Chang's because she can eat there. And I saw the look of just disappointment, these four women. was just like, really? And I'm like, was just like, fuck you. Fuck.
00:52:53
Speaker
Yeah. It's like, what are you what are you doing? I could just tell. It was like like, I didn't get that. Oh, nice. It was just like, ah. uh-huh everyone like went back their conversation. This might have been added pressure like Gringo's gotta show up.
00:53:06
Speaker
You know, it's like ah the assumption is I'm filthy rich just by being from the US. so but it But it was pretty funny it's what you just said about the trip where people are like, what are you guys doing? What are you ba on what are you doing? you think I like when people plant the seed too.
00:53:20
Speaker
She's turning 50, lad. She's taking her to fucking Sweden or whatever, you know. People planning. Must be doing something big, huh? Yeah. And some of it's just timing and being logical and thoughtful and not selfish. So like, I mean, what am going to miss? Like six of my kids basketball games, senior season, because I want to fucking go to Jamaica.
00:53:40
Speaker
So you can tell her friends to fuck themselves when. Yeah. Even our 25th wedding anniversary, I think the timing just was fucked up. So we ended up doing something a little later, but.
00:53:52
Speaker
ah she not Is she not that type of person or she's been like... Oh, she's not needy. Neither of us are needy about that stuff. like she She's big 5-0 in July. new so she's on the younger end of 94. She's on the younger... Yeah, she's like Charlie.
00:54:09
Speaker
But not as young as you. Our whole crew was pretty young though, actually. throw her in there but our one friend entrepreneur was is late July. Our other friend is November.
00:54:22
Speaker
house yeah Wow. I think somebody else was right around there with me though. I can't remember who it was. but yeah i was right oh ah There was a girl. Mary, I think she might have been younger than me. She was young. Way more mature than me in other parts of life.
00:54:40
Speaker
She was young in age. Maybe that's why. it was like we had to We had to overcompensate. yeah She was open for business, as they say. Wasn't she? i don't know. did Sweet girl.
00:54:51
Speaker
but She was she's younger than me. Attractive girl. Sweet girl. Open for business, though. Nice woman. yeah She was like a genius, too, wasn't she? One of those people? She was like, I don't know.
00:55:03
Speaker
She probably would fit into this era of box checking and getting to Harvard and all that shit pretty well. Yeah, maybe like a motivated person. Yeah.
00:55:14
Speaker
Let's all take a moment. a lot of people said I was driven. I don't know where they got that. think I was intense. Do you disagree? Yeah, no, I didn't have any real goals laid out. didn't have any like specific ambitions. I mean, I was an intense person, but I could get equally as intense going in Jake's backyard and playing volleyball, two-on-two volleyball as I could fucking well yeah there's state championship.
00:55:40
Speaker
ah you you are Like, is there a difference between driven and competitive? Yeah, there you go. You nailed it, buddy. There's people that both. There's people that are... You also, when you think about what you were doing out of high school, you' I don't know if that was your goal, but you ended up, like, you're going to the air Force Academy? That looks like a pretty driven first person. Yeah, maybe look that way.
00:56:02
Speaker
I just don't think there's as many people many people doing what they do now. You should see the GPAs that are coming out of my my son's high school. but But who's driven on that? The kids the parents? or i don't know where I don't know where it comes from. i don't know what the fear is. Obviously, I think they're trying to get into a selective school, but I don't know why that goal would be it so appealing if it's... I love the justification now, though. It's like, well, you you would you wouldn't believe it. You can't even get into fucking Arapahoe Community College if you don't have a 4.0. Right, but when did that fixation start? Because because because I think you and i probably weren't... always been there a little bit.
00:56:40
Speaker
A little bit, but not in the the entire high school, right? like i think I doubt that you and I were thinking about where we want to go to college really heavily in junior year, even the beginning of senior year.
00:56:52
Speaker
We just were like, ah, yeah, I'll figure that out. Yeah, I figured i'd I'd be either playing baseball or going to a ah some school in Colorado. Yeah. And like, I wasn't like, what do i got to do to get into Stanford? or Yeah.
00:57:07
Speaker
Yeah. I think some of that's actually waning in the most recent few years, but I'm just, that's my own speculation. Which one? The driven for? The people like striving so hard, I think they're kind of like saying, oh, man,
00:57:19
Speaker
That created a lot of stress. That created a lot of substance abuse and suicide. huh I've seen, i mean, I saw my nephew a little bit. i wasn't that involved, but he he applied to some pretty top-level schools and got into some real good schools and good programs. Even like he he got accepted even Colorado has like an aerospace program that's really hard to get into, and he got into that.
00:57:42
Speaker
And he he he ended up at Santa Barbara, which I guess is a very tough school studying physics there, which is like really hard to get into. Yeah. And we have ah have a niece that's there. and Oh, yeah? It's ridiculous. that For whatever reason, that school is ridiculously hard to get into. and Because it's like in paradise. That's why. Have you paradise. They're right on the beach. Yeah. Yeah. And then good good academics, I think. and And she's like, you know, there's a lot of Asians.
00:58:08
Speaker
Yeah. We should set them up, dude. Your niece, Don's kid, CJ? yeah Yeah, maybe they already hooked up. She must be loaded. I assume everyone who goes there filthy rich. Is that true?
00:58:21
Speaker
Not necessarily. but um ah She's there playing ball? Grandma's rich. Oh, Well, that's out of state. That's not ah that's not a freebie, as as we say, huh?
00:58:33
Speaker
Well, she's in state. she was from She's from there. Oh, she's Cali? She's Cali. She's psychopath? Cali woman? A SoCal? ah yeah what Yeah, I mean, I think he, the only school I don't i think he didn't get into might have been Berkeley, which is which is like crazy. But I do remember the comments my brother and my sister-in-law were like,
00:58:52
Speaker
you can't get there this kid did this and couldn't get into here and there. And like, so I do feel like it's the same thing we talked about last week, a little bit about capitalism breeds more capitalism. And then you can justify like, well, i got to make money because that's it's like.
00:59:07
Speaker
People are just be like, the system's fucked up. So I got to do it. So we got to drive. I got to push my kids into this and that AP classes and extra math and all that shit. And he's at an exclusive private school that sits in between some of the richest homes.
00:59:21
Speaker
in the state and ah like there's pressure in that environment. Yeah, I mean, I would honestly say it worked if that's yeah like it worked. If that's what you want. yeah I mean he actually was like engaged he's kinda but math elite he's got some crazy math skills so he's always doing but I think he got a he might have maybe the sounds stupid moves but I think he might have got like a perfect score on his math and CT or something like that some soldier but he's very young like a literate on man the younger ones a loser she's gonna she might be an Olympic skier just kidding if you if you're one of those academic people
01:00:02
Speaker
If you go to Kent Denver and you're a loser, and something happened. I don't know how there's got to be like, there's got, I feel like you, like there'd always be like rich kids that were like druggies and party and having fun. But from what understand, nobody can get into that school.
01:00:20
Speaker
It's not like a lot of my nephew's friends were trying to have money out. you like You're not, you're not applying there if you're not rich, but like they just couldn't get in like cause academics. so But what what academics are they evaluating in middle school? Is there like an entrance test? Yeah, there's an entrance exam.
01:00:37
Speaker
And i don't I think there's interviews and shit like that. That's real. Eighth grader interviewing. Awesome. Rich kid stuff. Yeah, you could probably hire a coach. I think it's i think it's great.
01:00:50
Speaker
I think it's great because... you? You think it's great, huh? Well, I just think, what are your what are your your options? If you're like me, yeah it's like, whatever, I don't care. So you can go to a decent public school. But if your your options are like the psycho American sports parent that's doing all this private shit for for sports that aren't going pan out anyways, or these people that are like, I'm going to put them in the best possible academic situation they could possibly have, I'm like, all right, I would go with option B probably.
01:01:21
Speaker
Yeah, maybe. Only two motherfucking options. um But I just think that it's just following the lead of your kid is probably the best advice. Some of some kids, despite growing up in a rich family, are not ambitious and they're not learn not good academically.
01:01:38
Speaker
They might be shored up with some tutoring and whole bunch of other resources, but... No, yeah, that wasn't that. Because I think, my like, my niece, I don't think it wasn't her scene.
01:01:49
Speaker
and yeah And so they were like, all right, let's. But she also established her own scene and really charged into skiing. Became one of the best in the country. But, and that put them on different paths. big deal.
01:02:00
Speaker
No, I'm just saying, I agree with you, but it wasn't the situation where my brother and my sister-in-law were like, academics, motherfucker. Like, I think my, my, uh. Nephew have was very good at math. was our And then there was ah there's all the same shit, dude, where people, white people move out to the suburbs. They also lived in the city, and like the options, you know, it was like a decision.
01:02:22
Speaker
It wasn't like they were just going to Cherry Creek Heritage or one of these other fancy white high schools. Yeah, no. Denver East is just, they were right by there. But they weren't zoned by East. I think actually they might even go South, and South's supposed to be kind of popping now.
01:02:34
Speaker
Oh, yeah, it's been popping for a decade. Yeah. It was more of the elementary school shit. I think they, like DPS, some of those inner city schools, they they get the high school. They'll always have like an anchor couple high schools in a city that are good.
01:02:48
Speaker
Yeah. You can find an elementary. There's a good one there right there. They could they probably, they couldn't get in there. Yeah. That one down there, wash Wash Park, that's like the best school in the world. Yeah. But the middle schools are always in shambles because these parents, these parents with money, they're just filled with fear that their kid's going to get You know, you make the public to elementary school pop and then you start putting your mind, middle school, you're like, oh, fuck. Right. And then you've said, go and mull in. We heard everybody because we lived in there. We heard everybody say, yeah, we're going to do public.
01:03:19
Speaker
Of course, everybody did public for elementary. Every single one of them went off. Did they go straight to private or just rezone? um They went to Colorado Academy or Kent.
01:03:32
Speaker
or something I've never heard of, and we moved to the mountains, sluts. That's the funny thing about it there is like, I mean, I think here too, but you know, like all ah all those all those public high schools are pretty amazing there.
01:03:46
Speaker
A lot of them. I don't know about DPS, but think of like, I mean, I'm sure Heritage is a pretty fucking nice school, right? It is a nerd's paradise, dude. It's a nice place.
01:03:58
Speaker
it's It's been around for a while. It's not like brand new, but like it's a nice place. Columbine is a fucking nice ass high school. and Like, so you don't necessarily have to go that route.
01:04:09
Speaker
but No, you don't. You don't. But I get that the the pressure's there. it's It's really hard to not clamor for the best. Yeah, you you didn't you ever feel any pressure. We might have talked about this, but like get your kid.
01:04:24
Speaker
He showed a lot of promise in hoops to get him in a school that was like ah some dominant hoops program. No, because he grew so late that you wouldn't have been able to predict that.
01:04:37
Speaker
And he's he's he's making, he's putting them on the map. ah Yeah. Yeah. where did How did we get to this, dude? i don't know, Yeah.
01:04:56
Speaker
Just a small town in Florida, a place to grow up. Met my wife, Darlene, took her in my pickup truck. We had two nice kids, one girl and one boy.
01:05:10
Speaker
But as they got older, we weren't feeling any joy. Then our neighbor, Bob, told us, if there's a will, then there's will.
01:05:23
Speaker
Now we're swingers, pull out the pineapple We're swingers, now hanging at chapel Once a week we go to Bob's with other couples Just like us ain't trade If there's a will then there's
01:05:51
Speaker
Bob has vacuum sealed bags and ain't no beats I watch him and darling go as she screams I tied up his wife while others watch It's a sex party, no one's wearing socks Thanks tell Bob we know If there's a will then there's a way
01:06:18
Speaker
Now we're swingers, pull out the pineapple We're swingers, not hanging at chapel Once a week we go to bars with other couples just like us and trade If there's a will then there's a way
01:06:46
Speaker
We got Jim, Tom, Larry with each other's wives Then there's Joe, Susan, Terry having fun with knives Hell and Bob, they use the furry cuffs Be and Carl, they just come and act like cucks Thanks to Bob, we know If there's a will, then there's a way
01:07:13
Speaker
Now we're swingers, pull out the pineapple We're swingers, not hanging at chapel Once a week we go to Bob's with other couples Just like us and trade there's a will then there's a way