Transcript
Speaker: Fri-Gay the 13th Horror Podcast is a proud independent podcast. To learn more about the show, visit Fri-Gay13.com.
Speaker: Oh, I love a scenic drive. Fresh air, open road, Indiana in September. Why are we slowing down? Oh, GPS says turn left here. Here, but that that's just a wall of corn. It's a literal wall of corn, Andrew.
Speaker: It says it's a shortcut. Shortcuts however are are how every horror movie starts. Just just just turn the car around. It's just a gravel road. Andrew, the corn is eight feet tall on both sides. We can't see anything. Anything could be in there.
Speaker: It's just corn. I grew up in northwest Indiana. I know what corn does at night. It watches. It's two in the afternoon. Then why is the sky doing that? Why why is everything suddenly orange and quiet?
Speaker: that You know, that's the the sun. It goes behind the cloud. No, no. Why is the radio only playing a children's choir? That's just the Bluetooth. I hit the wrong playlist.
Speaker: Andrew, the corn moved. It's the breeze. Then why is the breeze walking toward us in a row? Huh. Huh. You don't say huh. You're the calm one.
Speaker: You don't get to say huh. Huh. There's a kid standing and in the road. ah He's holding a sickle. Drive. Drive! He's waving.
Speaker: wants us to come inside. Into the corn? I mean, looks like he has a charcuterie board. I hate that I'm considering it. It's episode 169.
Speaker: Cornfields are terrifying.
Speaker: I am the writing on the wall, the whisper in the classroom. I'm Marjorie Greene, and I approve this message. To save America, stop socialism, and stop China.
Speaker: Faith and hide, we honor thee, from life to death to rise. Woo-hoo! Horror in real life. Doubters, the doomsters, the gloomsters, they are going to get it wrong.
Speaker: Horror in the movies.
Speaker: Where are you gonna hide? Nowhere. Because there's no one like you left. What do we want? Justice! When do we want it? Now!
Speaker: Let's go! What are you waiting for, huh? What are you waiting for? I want you to know that the movement we started is only just beginning. Sometimes.
Speaker: Conquering a corn maze is a fall tradition, but at Twins Barbecue in Brookfield, visitors will find extra meaning behind the stocks. It says Dolly. There's a picture of Dolly. And then it says an American treasure.
Speaker: This maze is one of 20 in North America honoring the queen of country. What's not to love about Dolly Parton? Dolly Parton passed away August 25th, but the theme was in the works long before to celebrate the music icon and honor the 31st anniversary of her children's literacy program.
Speaker: We were so excited because we think that she's such an exceptional woman. Welcome back to another episode of Freigate the 13th Horror Podcast. My name is Maddie. And I'm Andrew. And if this is your first time with us on Fragge the 13th Horror Podcast, first of all, hello.
Speaker: Good to be with you. Thank you for for being with us and lending your ears, fellow countrymen and women and country theys. But if it is your first time with us, this is the podcast that talks all about horror, horror in real life and in the movies from an LGBT perspective.
Speaker: And today, this is our 169th episode. It is 169, right, Andrew? didn't get it wrong. Oh, yeah. 169. My favorite number after that three-digit number contains my favorite number, which is 69. So there you go. I'll let your brains take it from there.
Speaker: and maddie And Maddie, do I have a game for you later that I cater directly to you? Oh, I can't wait. This is going to great news. um But folks, we're talking about cornfields today. And as two Midwestern kids, um look, I think we know a bit about cornfields. I'm not going to lie.
Speaker: um And I am from Indiana. like I think it's us, Iowa, and Nebraska. like We got the best cornfields. I'm fairly sure. um Lots to talk about. And um Andrew, also, by the time that our listeners get this episode, International Podcast Day will have come and gone, which happens on ah this year. It's Wednesday, the 30th of September, 2026.
Speaker: twenty twenty six um What a great day, right? what Yeah, it it it's really fun that people can still ah produce their own content and yeah hopefully people find it. And we're so happy that you found us. you know Exactly. you know Andrew and I were just talking before we started recording about how about how podcasts have changed. and So much. It's ridiculous.
Speaker: And this and that, whatever. And I i am really glad, um ah really proud. that's that that That's the right word. I'm sure you are too, Andrew. That our podcast, you know look we we've we've changed here and there, but the core of what we've done has really stayed the same the entire time.
Speaker: And what we what we set out to do has never changed. like Yeah. it You know, so i I definitely appreciate that because, you know, in the face of so many changes, we've been like...
Speaker: I don't know I think that a lot of people have asked us to do different things. And yeah honestly, I feel like we have just been steadfast and been like, no, this is the mission. This is what we're doing. And this is what we want to do. And yeah I think it's really important. so In other words, we don't have a TV show. We're not doing a bunch of video. Like, That's just it. we are We are essentially amateur radio hosts. um And if I'm being honest, I think that's that's who the best podcasters are. if I'm being real, are amateur radio hosts. And um look, we've been doing this for ah for almost a decade now. So I think we have we have at least some laurels to rest on. um And i just I'm really proud to be amongst a a lot of great podcasters who keep it real. I think that's really cool. agree. one.
Speaker: I think the power of the voice is getting lost a lot. and Oh, girl. i And I'm really proud of us. So keep going. And and i you know the last thing I would say is this. Welcome also to a podcast where there are no ads. for the so for the next about one and a half to two hours, you're not going to hear an ad in here. Isn't that lovely? How many other podcasts do you listen to that are like that? Very, very few these days.
Speaker: Oh my God. Yeah, right. So Andrew, we are talking about cornfields today. um Look, cornfields are... I was thinking about how cornfields were such ah were such an important part of my life for so long. And what I mean by that is, obviously, i I like to eat corn. Corn goes into a lot of products that I use, whether it's food products or even like...
Speaker: plastics and other kind of things. But also, like, i just grew up around cornfields, like where I'm from. Yeah, me too. Hobart, Indiana. You did as well up in, up in, um, what's the city that you're actually from? Well, that depends. i I spend a lot of time in... I would say Traverse City is probably tra best is probably the best depiction of where I grew up. There you go. Where people recognize it. and So there so like up by Traverse City, two cornfields, all that kind of thing, right? But now in my life, there's no cornfields. No one grows corn in Ireland. It just doesn't happen here. The climate isn't right for it. The soil isn't right for it. So like it is it is kind of
Speaker: bizarre to me that like this thing that I like would constantly see. and like, even when I live in Chicago, it's not that far to Chicago. You go to find corn. Like it's just not around me anymore. is and so kind Let me ask a question about that.
Speaker: So like when you go out to eat or like when you go to like, I don't know, just like your average, like, what Like ah a half chicken type of restaurant. You know what I mean? Like ah okay yeah kf like a KFC or something like that. Yes.
Speaker: Like is buttered corn an offering or not? Yeah. So not usually, but like some places will have something. So like um there's this fried chicken place that I like to go to for like, you know, like chicken wings or like chicken. Yeah. And they're called All Bar Chicken. And there' there's a I think there's maybe three or four locations around Dublin. And there might there might be one in like Galway or something else. too i'm I'm not entirely sure. But there's ah there's the location that I go to all the time up in Stony Batter. It's not far from where I live.
Speaker: And ah when you go there or when you order to your house, ah you can get corn ribs, they call them. Corn ribs. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's like a new thing. but Yeah. it it's It's basically just like i mean, the corn is still stuck on the cob thing, but like they've shaved it off the cob. Yeah. It's like a strip. It's like a strip of cob. Yeah. Yeah. We we have that here, too. It's very weird. I don't like it. so Well, I don't like it either. And I'll tell you why. Because like, okay, if it was like a corn rib that like you could eat the whole thing and like it's just there that, okay, cool. How nice.
Speaker: But it's not, you still have to still got to put in the work. yeah Yeah. You got to eat it off the fucking thing. Like you're a fucking savage. You know what i mean? So like, uh, there, there is that. And you know, every now and then you'll find like a half cob kind of thing with a dinner or whatever, but it's very uncommon. It's really uncommon. And like, you know, there's still like you can still like buy like canned corn in the in the store and and all that kind of thing.
Speaker: um But as far as I know, it doesn't come from here. I think I think that most of the corn that we would get would come from probably France and come from yeah ah the Ukraine, I would imagine. um So, yeah, it's just there's no corn here.
Speaker: And you know what my last you're my least my least favorite kind of corn is cream corn. No, I actually love cream corn. Really? I love cream corn casserole. That's one of my favorite things. Wait, let me get what corn would be the least favorite for you? Would it be like, well, it's not corn bread. I know that. No, it's frozen corn.
Speaker: Oh, okay. All right. I hate frozen vegetables. Like I will take a canned vegetable 1000 times before I have a frozen vegetable. Tell you what, there's some good canned corn out there too. I'll be honest.
Speaker: Well, that I mean, and when you mentioned cream corn, I was like, cream corn casserole ready for it. Cream corn casserole. I don't mind. Like if if I was just having like if someone just slopping out cream corn on a plate, I'm like, I don't want that.
Speaker: But like in a casserole, sure, it makes sense. Mix it with some cornbread, baby. That makes sense to me. i I do. I quite like corn. I think corn is delicious. I do miss having corn on the cob in the fall kind of thing.
Speaker: i look forward to it when I go back for Thanksgiving kind of kind of business. like Well, it's the perfect time of year literally right now. like Oh, God, yeah. This is primetime corn season, baby. And like in the Midwest. Motherfucker, like mid Midwest corn is delicious. Like obviously I grew up eating a lot of Indiana corn.
Speaker: That corn is fucking good. It is delicious. It is very good. um When I was a much younger girl, my summer job after college was always working at the Deep River County Park where in the park we had an an old historic grist mill.
Speaker: What did we grind in the grist mill, Andrew? But corn. We made cornmeal all the time. And it was actually pretty fucking good. it really was. Yeah, i have ah I have a little bit of a story about cornfields, if if you wouldn't mind. i love a good story about corn.
Speaker: So growing up where I lived, I lived, you know, in the in in the country, like where our nearest neighbor was like at least a mile away. And I worked at a little known establishment called Best Buy.
Speaker: And that was a 45 minute drive from oh my... my god Yeah, it was a 45-minute drive to Traverse City from where I live. this was in high school. So I would go to high school all day long, leave at, what, 345 when high school got out, go and get to my job by 5 o'clock at at Best Buy.
Speaker: ah Shout out store 500. Blasting third-eye blind in the cars you drove. Blasting it. Window down. Well, we're going I was a part of the media part like the media section of Best Buy. Of course, of course.
Speaker: my My claim to fame is that I sold Bruce Willis an N.E.R.D. CD. That was like my claim to fame. Sweet Bruce Willis. God love him. ah that's when i That's when I met Rumor Willis and Demi Moore was in close proximity. Oh, Demi. And I, so there were there are two ways to get to Traverse City. There was like the main way, and for locals, you'll understand this. For people that don't, you can look it up on a map. But like, You could either go the Buckley way, which was like you go through this little town called Buckley. And it was that was like the most efficient way. sure But every once in a while, i would want to take the the the quote unquote like back way.
Speaker: And that was through a little town called Gron. And you would go through Gron. And then it was literally like, I don't know, 30 minutes of cornfields, like literally nothing else like farms and cornfields.
Speaker: And I have to tell you, there used to be this kind of like, I don't know if you'd call it an urban legend because it was really only between me and my brother. But like sure when we would drive that way, when we would when we would drive that quote unquote back way. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker: You, you drove through all these cornfields and I swear to God, i don't know if it was a a, trick of the light or, you know, cause it was at night, like obviously with headlights and of course in in my Pontiac Sunfire convertible that I had when I was a teenager. at at least, at least three of your friends growing up in that era had a Pontiac Sunfire at least three. Exactly.
Speaker: um And when I would drive home that quote unquote back way. Yeah. When you drove through those cornfields and it would hit certain light and certain like shadows, I swear to God, there were people in those cornfields. Like it.
Speaker: There probably were. it just, it, it really freaks you out. Like, i think it's like a trick of like how cornfields have the stocks that almost mimic like a hat that mimic kind of like a person.
Speaker: Yeah. And you would just see, I swear, like in there were certain nights in the fall specifically when the corn stalks have just been harvested. And, you know, i think it's funny, like around around Chicago and around the Midwest, we think of like, the cornfields oh there's gonna be a corn maze out of them yeah like sure like where I grew up it was all working families working farms so it was when it was freshly harvested there was something so sinister about those empty cornfields and I swear there was there was something in there
Speaker: Well, I mean, listen, it it it reminds me of, ah yeah I was trying to think today was this 2025 or 2024, and I think it was 2024. And I was back in the States for Thanksgiving.
Speaker: And um I had already done my, because I usually do Chicago and then I go to Indiana and then, you know, stay with my family. And ah on the Indiana part, I had gone to meet some some some some local friends there for dinner that night and then a couple of drinks and then going back to the house, the the ah the the the parents' home of of our friend Courtney, Andrew. Mm-hmm.
Speaker: And, um, and I, I wasn't feeling all that great that day. i I had been going through some, some anxiety issues around that time. And like, I had sort of had a panic attack that night and I just wasn't, I wasn't in like a good headspace, but we were going back to, um, we were heading back to Courtney's parents' house, as I said, and this is in Hobart, Indiana. And we were driving to get there. you, you you drive through cornfields to get there.
Speaker: And ah we were were driving into this T and then we would have to turn right. And, you know, it's just once again, all cornfields around us. All bad things happen at the T. Exactly. And as we pulled up to that T, there there was a big street light there, but there's no other lights around. It's just it's just that one. So if you can picture it, you know, it it was probably, you know, 11 o'clock or so. So it's in November. It's deep late at night. So but it's it's pretty dark and black out. Well, yeah, and that and that's that's almost like a spotlight in those areas. like That's just it, right. So it feels like a spotlight looking looking down. So as we do it, like we we we we pull up and like there's not a lot of cars around. So this is usually a turn where you do a bit of a California stop. You stop really quick and then you just turn right. um So we did kind of that. And as we did, we could clearly see standing by the light pole
Speaker: this what appeared to be a young man in a striped jacket sort of like a vintage style you might find from like the the late 60s or the 70s um and of course it's november so it's kind of a wintry kind of jacket but we both saw him when i tell you there's no reason for anybody to be there i mean it there's absolutely no reason why anyone would be walking there not Yeah, there's nothing there's nothing around. Nothing to walk there. Nobody's going to be doing anything there. That's not happening. We both saw it. And it's almost like we saw it.
Speaker: And we both had to clock it as Courtney was turning. And we both looked at each other. and We said, did you just see that guy? And we were like, yes. And we were like, holy fucking shit. So we we we like spin down to the first place that we could turn the car around. And it's just like a little bit down the road. It's like this little outcropping like like maintenance building thing. So we drove maybe 30 seconds to it, turned around, raced back to that spot just to like make sure we weren't absolutely crazy.
Speaker: The person gone, whatever it was, was gone. So we maintain based on how we feel and the fact that we couldn't see any evidence of this person in about 30 seconds that it was a ghost.
Speaker: Don't know who it was, but we felt very strong about that. When you say like, I i heard that you, uh, you described the coat, but like, was it like a, like a farmer's coat, like a flannel coat or was it like a motorcycle jacket type of? So imagine like, um, like, like, like waist length, like early style puffer coat, if that makes any sense. yeah Yeah. Yeah. And like, if I, if I remember the colors correctly, it was blue, red and like tan. Yeah.
Speaker: So like, that's totally different. Like you don't see blue in the cornfield. like Right, right, right. Yeah. And so like, you know, it's one of those like, like stripy ones where like, you know, like ah the upper chest and the shoulders. know exactly what you're talking about. Yeah, right. And then there's red and then there's tan kind of, kind of, you know, under that. And like, they're all different sized stripes.
Speaker: um That's what it was. And and we, when we, like we we did that and we were like, holy shit. And we even like drove down the road a little bit too. Like, was there anybody there? Anyone walked to make sure whatever? Yeah. Couldn't find anybody.
Speaker: We get back to her parents' house and we are buzzing because we're like, holy shit, what did we just see? We went back there the next morning too just to still like go see if there were like cigarettes around or like a footprints or whatever.
Speaker: No evidence of anybody. Just crazy. That's crazy. Cornfields, man, there's always something going on there. There's always happening. There's something mysterious about... yeah He who walks behind the road. There is. And look, I'll i'll bring up one. like I've talked about this ad nauseum on this podcast. I don't mean to like you know bring it up and get macabre right now. But like, look, that's another reason why my dad died in his accident was because of cornfields. So when he was going through because he died, he died in October.
Speaker: um And this is a very it's almost 30 years ago now. ah But the field that he that he was driving through the the farmers were required to have those fields cut down by then.
Speaker: And they didn't do it. And so one of the conjectures is that, well, maybe the other car and dad, like they just didn't see each other because of the corn and the storm going on in the darkness and all the other shit.
Speaker: So yeah, cornfields are, they're ah they're a weird part of my life, I gotta say. That's something that they don't tell you about. Like when you are, like I didn't grow up in a city, but I've been in a city for, I don't know, God, between Grand Rapids and here, I've been in a city for 25 years. But sure yeah it's something that you don't really understand is when you go to the like actual country,
Speaker: There are no lights. You win the country, baby. And like, it is just black. Black. that like Like, that is what, like, headlights in the city are, like, whatever. Like, we have them.
Speaker: Great. But they don't, they're not really, like, used for anything because we have lights everywhere. True. Headlights in the country, That's like your visual. Like that is yeah what you have to see.
Speaker: That's it. So like, yeah, I totally understand where you're coming from with with your dad and everything. Like it's, there are certain corners and certain things where if people don't maintain their, their, you know, their property or maintain their harvest or whatever, it can create really, really bad blind spots for people. Now, Andrew, something interesting when I was looking into things to talk about today is, look, maybe that won't be as much of a problem in the future.
Speaker: Because unfortunately, with climate change and with things getting hotter around the world, NASA now predicts that by 2030, and it's not even now, this is actually from 2021, so it may even be higher than this. But the prediction was made by NASA with with research that was going on that by 2030, there will be up to 24% lower global maize yields by 2030.
Speaker: So imagine that around the world, like a quarter of the world's corn is just wiped away because of climate change. And I started thinking about that and I was like, Wow.
Speaker: Like think about how much corn goes into like everything, you know, because it's not just, it's not just like a corn that you eat from a cob. Like there's corn oil, there's, there's corn syrup. that It's in those plastics. It's in plastic. It's in this, it's in that. Like it truly is just, it's just everywhere. So I think that that is, um it's pretty terrifying. and when I was looking into the research too, you know, like what are some of the, like the other, like,
Speaker: like everyday effects that that that we'll see from it. um Once again, it's not just the corn part. It's also meat, eggs, and dairy. They'll start costing a lot more because obviously that's the main source of feed for those animals. yep um And then, you know, as we just said, there's hidden corn and packaged food. So corn syrup, starch, oil, flour, um those are all in soft drinks and cereals and snacks and sauces and baked goods and all the other things. You know, all those prices start to go up.
Speaker: fuel and energy where petrol or or just gasoline gets blended with corn ethanol as it does in the United States, ah obviously that is going to push that up too. So, you know, it really is a little scary. It makes me think of like, of like interstellar, you know, how it got so hot that the crops just started to all die out until there were no more crops to be had. And I think that's a really important, important part of this when we think about you know, these, these cornfields that have been around us for so long.
Speaker: Imagine if suddenly they just, they just weren't, you know, I think it's, I think it's so funny that you bring up interstellar and I immediately think of idiocracy where they started watering the plants with Gatorade. and Or there you go too. You got that. I mean, listen, it is basically, ioic especially as the midterms approach, Andrew, idiocracy is in full, it's in full force right now. yeah Go vote people. Go vote.
Speaker: Go vote. um So speaking of kind of like the ah the the the global aspect of corn, I found something kind of crazy.
Speaker: Tell me. Did you know that corn sweats? if you look i did know this, or at least I've heard of it before, but tell me more about it. So do you ever wonder, like, so sorry, for everyone that didn't grow up in the Midwest, this is not going to make a lot of sense, but did you ever wonder why August is always so sweltering and why it's always so fucking moist in the air and you just feel gross all the time? Is it because of corn sweat?
Speaker: It's because of corn. That is fucked up. That's really weird. There's a thing called transpiration. And it's basically that the corn is evaporating water through the soil, but it's also putting that back into the environment.
Speaker: What? So yeah, it uses like a surprisingly amount of water. So I'm just going to read this really quick. The University of Illinois ah has estimated that an acre of corn can release thousands of gallons of water per day wow under the right conditions.
Speaker: ah Now consider that Illinois plants roughly 10 million acres of corn in a typical gull typical year. That's suddenly an enormous amount of moisture just being pumped into the atmosphere. So 2023, in a heat wave in Peoria, Illinois, it recorded a dew point of 83 degrees Fahrenheit.
Speaker: That is tying the all-time record by the National Weather Service. mike So it's it's kind of crazy that like this thing that we just like, oh yeah, we're going to go eat an ear of corn or like whatever. Like, you know, it's and you literally said it's in everything. But it's also a huge impact on the environment and like how much water is in the environment.
Speaker: And I honestly never knew that like... Listen, do I understand that, like, yes, all crops need water to survive? Like, totally get that. But, like, I didn't realize that it was also putting it back out into the environment, which is so crazy to me. I don't know. It was a fascinating fact that, like,
Speaker: Why I didn't know this growing up amongst all of this corn, it's crazy that it actually like has a human trait of sweating back into the environment. I wonder if it's just because like corn is just so watery, you know, like there is so much moisture in it and it's wrapped in a husk. So, I mean, like, God, I even wonder, like, what is, like, the temperature inside an ear of corn? I don't want to know. That sounds like a layer of hell. I don't want know. God, yeah. Like, I mean, in the deep summer, it must be fucking roasting in there. how it doesn't, like, pop on its own right there is crazy.
Speaker: That's wild. I did not know that about corn sweat. And also, the the phrase corn sweat makes me feel a little nervous. I'm not going to lie. Isn't that Superman? Isn't that his name? Maybe. It's just like it's a little it's a little much. Like, ah I don't know. i'm not I'm not a big fan of sweat in general. I'll be honest.
Speaker: I also want to talk a little bit about like a Midwestern pastime. And that is going to the apple orchard slash corn maze. Come on. How fun is that? You go, you go, you pick some apples, you maybe pick out a pumpkin, you maybe get some like an apple cider donuts, that kind of stuff. That sounds really good.
Speaker: But then there's always the option of doing the corn maze. Hell yeah. I want to tell you a little bit about something crazy that happened in Massachusetts. Tell me.
Speaker: um So it happened at Connor's farm in Danvers, Massachusetts in 2011. A couple entered the farm, seven acre corn maze with their five year old child and three week old baby. So keep in mind, that's the stance you're working with. You're working with, you know, parents, but also new parents again.
Speaker: ah Darkness fell and they became disoriented. And they eventually had to call 911 because they couldn't figure out how to get out of the corn maze. Oh, my God. here's Here's the crazy thing. And obviously, nothing bad happened to these people. They were found by police. They actually had to a canine unit come out. It was a whole spectacle. That's insane. Jesus, God. But here's here's the crazy thing and what I looked a little more into.
Speaker: They were only 25 feet from the exit.
Speaker: And it's weird. But like, you know, i i will once again, you know, just for people who have never like been in a cornfield before, which to be fair is probably quite a few people like cornfields are dense in a way that you don't understand if you've never been in one before. Like they it's it really does become like walls around you. And corn is so tall that if you can't see above it, it is very hard to understand where you are.
Speaker: And also the ground beneath you is not just flat ground. like therere uneven yeah exactly that there will It's uneven because there will be furrows for all the corn as well. So it it can be discombobulating.
Speaker: Well, no, let me tell you, there's actually like I looked into this even further. There's a scientific like basis for this. Oh, my Lord. It's called the walking in circles cliche. um In 2009, there is a ah study published in Current Biology. They tracked people attempting to walk straight through an unfamiliar environment. So huh ah corn like kind of like a cornfield.
Speaker: When the sun or other useful directions, so keep in mind the sun went down when these people went into the cornfield, when those things disappear, people's brains do something where they can't understand permanence.
Speaker: They can't understand how to get out. So like, you know, every every person that is probably listening to this would probably just be like, well, just walk in a straight line, you'll eventually get out, da-da-da-da-da. But there's something about your brain that causes disorientation.
Speaker: And corn stalks specifically, because of the way that they are on the horizon and the way that they create lines, it does something to your brain that you can't figure it out.
Speaker: And that's what I think what makes corn mazes so fascinating to people. huh But, you know, thankfully the, the Connors farm case, they, they called 911. They were smart about it and they got out, but it could have been a lot more disastrous. And it does make you think that like,
Speaker: do Well, you obviously do remember, but i'm just I'm saying it as like, remember when? Yeah, sure. Like when we didn't have maps on our phone or maps on our car or whatever, like you would just be like, oh yeah, take a right at the Dairy Queen or take ah yeah or take a left at the you know giant fork or whatever. Like that's how we interpret as humans. That's how we interpret directions. So when you don't have any of those permanents in your brain,
Speaker: it's really hard for the brain to figure it out. And I thought that was fascinating. because it means like you know What what what you just said there is like, You know, there's um at each of those moments that you just mentioned is a landmark that you know of.
Speaker: So like, you know, if you're giving directions within your town, you're saying, oh, at turn right at the Dairy Queen, turn left at the Walgreens, you know, go to go to Route 6, you know, take take the snake road or what, you know, whatever. Like those are the kind of things that, you know, it tells a story in your head. yeah if you don't if you don't already have those stories in your brain, in your mind,
Speaker: you know, telling themselves over and over again, there's no way that you can relate to it because humans relate to everything through storytelling, everything that we do. And it's just stock after stock. Like you can't, say there's no, there's no difference. So it's, it's kind of crazy, but very calm another thing that I looked up um is have there ever been like weird true crime around cornfields? And I found you one, oh tell us.
Speaker: I found one particular case that kind of rang true to because ah the woman lived and grew up in McHenry County in Illinois, which is, you know, what, like, I would say like an hour outside of Chicago, right? Like and one ah one of the collar counties.
Speaker: Yeah. And so ah this is a ah story about Peggy Lynn Johnson. So, um, It happened in Raymond, Wisconsin in July of 1999 when the body of an unidentified young woman was discovered in a cornfield.
Speaker: She had suffered extensive injuries and severe malnutrition, but investigators couldn't determine her identity. And she went unidentified for nearly 20 years.
Speaker: that That just seems, it just seems like impossible that that could even happen now, you know? Yeah. And then, so get this. It turned out to be 23-year-old Peggy Lynn Johnson, who had previously lived in McHenry County, like I said. um That identification eventually led investigators to Linda LaRoche, who whom Johnson had been living with and a nanny and a housekeeper for. ah And prosecutors presented evidence that Johnson had endured prolonged abuse. And 2022, that woman, LaRoche, was finally convicted of first-degree intentional homicide after 20 years of getting away with it.
Speaker: Jesus Christ. That's crazy. all be All because... cornfields don't present themselves as like anywhere where people would think to look like it's, it's that thing that I was talking about earlier where like you don't even want to go in there because it's, you know, the, to, to quote like back rooms and all those kinds of movies, those liminal spaces of like, yeah I don't even want to know what's in there.
Speaker: And so yeah don't, don't you think it would be, all, it is almost like the perfect place to hide a body. Yeah. And then when you live in the country and there isn't good tracking or like whatever, the police don't know who you are. true it's It's kind of crazy. Like, i i listen, I don't support tracking and I don't support the police, but like it is kind of crazy that like you could just disappear in the corn and never be found.
Speaker: like You know what i mean? Like, you know, i remember being a child and living close to cornfields once again. And like my cousins or my friends saying, oh, let's go in, let's go in.
Speaker: And hell yeah never really wanting to go in. and as yeah As someone that grew up around this, it's itchy in there. Don't go in there. Well, and I remember too, I don't i dont like i don't know, if did I don't think you ever did, but, or I don't know if maybe your brother did, but I know my brother did. he would do the the corn detasseling. Do you know about that? Do you remember do you remember those?
Speaker: Is that like where you harvest the corn? Well, it it was, I don't know exactly what detasseling is, but you like you had to go through and like cut something off the corn, but it would always be in the summer and ah and it when it would always be, um it would always be like, you know, the the guys on the football team would go do it or whatever. And so, um, uh, my brother did it and and I remember him always telling me, oh, here it is. Detasseling is removing the pollen producing flowers, the tassel from the tops of the corn plants and placing them on the ground.
Speaker: So you like, you have to go in there do that all by hand basically. And I remember that, that he would just be like exhausted as hell and have horror stories coming back from those, those working days. Um, and I just always thought to myself, I don't ever want to do that. I don't want to detassel corn.
Speaker: I can tell you, like, so, uh, not my direct grandparents, but my, my half brother, his grandparents owned a farm. Like they had a working, a working farm, like up until, you know, I, I, his grandma just died a couple years ago. So like they had a working farm my entire childhood where they sold eggs, like by the side of the road, they sold, uh, hay to horse, like horse farms. And they also had corn and,
Speaker: I remember like those days where we would have to go and either bale hay or, ah harvest the corn. Those were hell. They were hell yeah because it was so itchy. And so i just can't even describe it it. I mean, imagine, imagine rolling around in your bed and it's full of just,
Speaker: Husk. That's what you were in all day long. And I just remember being exhausted all the time after doing that. and you want know You want to know who i bet does a lot of corny tasseling in America, Andrew?
Speaker: Immigrants. Just saying out there, just saying for the work that nobody wants to do, I bet a lot of immigrants do it. it's It's just one of those things that like you don't, and until you experience it, you don't really understand it.
Speaker: And a lot of people just don't experience it. i mean look but Most of the people that I know here, they've never experienced being in a cornfield before. you know like yeah they They don't know what it's like. They don't know what it's like to live around that. Of course, there are crops here, duh. But there there are no crops that are that tall here. so Nothing happens like that.
Speaker: Let me ask you this. Do you do you ever, in like because I know that you've done a lot of driving around Ireland and and done a lot of like the countryside and stuff. Yeah. Do you ever see like the big grain bins? like Do you ever see like those silo-type things? No, because they're because they're they're really not here.
Speaker: you know because it's it's i mean like well like what actual Let me just look it up really quick. What grains actually get grown here? Grains in Ireland. well Now, going back to your Indiana days, did you ever... yeah um I know that you grew up like in kind of the country like on the outskirts of a town. Yeah. But like, did you ever like, this is kind of a weird question, but did you ever like play like on farmland? Like, did you ever like, have like a, like, I'm specifically I'm talking about like grain bins, ah maybe like a barn full of hay, like those kind of things.
Speaker: ah A few times. We we had ah we had cousins that we we didn't we didn't really go around very much, but I have a couple of memories because they were kind of weird. i'm not going to lie.
Speaker: yeah I have a couple of memories So are all cousins weirdo. Yes. But these these were exceptionally strange. ah I have a couple memories of of going on their farm, um but not ah not a ton.
Speaker: Not a ton. so did you ever Most of my farm-type memories would be from like visiting the apple orchard, going to U-Pix, going to like the farm market. So more of like the quote-unquote touristy things. Touristy touristy plus like just like normal consumer from from the farm. Because like in Hobart, there was a place called Johnson's Farm, um which was... but i look back on it. It was fucking awesome. like They had everything. They had tons of fruit and tons of grain, and they grew a bunch of vegetables and...
Speaker: Yeah, probably like a petting farm. They had they had a couple of stores around around the area where they would, of course, sell their own produce. And it was fucking awesome, man. and It was really good. But then also, like it it wasn't a farm, but my uncle, who lived, my uncle and aunt, of course,
Speaker: who lived but less than a mile out down the road from us, ah my uncle Jim, ah he was a really great gardener. like he just He had the green thumb. He would grow he would grow his own corn. So yeah he didn't have a farm by any means, but like they had ah a fair plot of land. with their you know They had a nice house and a pool behind it.
Speaker: And then on the side lot, he would always grow green beans and red potatoes and corn and couple of tomatoes and a few other things. Yeah, like a 10 by 10 type thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So like, you know, I kind of have good memories of being around that. So it was like, you know, a mini, mini farm kind of thing. So you don't know horrors of a grain mill?
Speaker: No, I don't. I don't. Um, so if, if people don't understand, like when you harvest corn, you, for the most part, you get it shucked. Like you get it off the, you get it off the cob, what you don't sell and you put it into a silo because yeah that's usually what you feed your cows and your chickens and like that kind of thing. And it keeps it safe and it keeps it dry and all that. Yeah, exactly. What people don't tell you is how dangerous those things are.
Speaker: Um, because I, so we didn't have like the traditional silo, but my, my, my grandparents had a, what would you call that? It was almost like a, like a chicken wire made into like a shack that stored all the corn.
Speaker: Like, and I don't know why, but we would go play in it. But like, it you don't understand like how much like it is like quicksand because you can easily like just start to sink into it.
Speaker: And when you put it in a silo, and I think this was highlighted in a Quiet Place, right? Like where they were in the silo at one point. Yeah. In that movie. Yeah.
Speaker: And it's so easy to drown in corn. And like, I even found a specific example. This of obviously is from Illinois, but local to me. But like in 2010, there were three workers who became trapped in a grain bin. ah Two of them only ages 14 and 19. So very good athlete can get out of there.
Speaker: They were engulfed and suffocated. in the quad oh that is and that is that is truly terrifying oh yeah and and even osha has documented additional fatalities including like or sorry involving workers who entered bins to try to like either clear them or try to clear like a like um because it gets stuck you know what i mean like it's not like a perfect system and they become engulfed and they die Oh man, that is, that's very, very scary.
Speaker: Very scary. Can you, can you imagine death by corn? I mean, like of, of, of the worst deaths that I can imagine, you know, death by fire and death by drowning are definitely, you know, two of the the tops that enter my brain. Yeah. So this is sort of like drowning.
Speaker: um i guess it really is drowning. i guess it is like drowning, drowning on like suffocation of corn. Yeah. Like, and, and just like that, that's the kind of thing where, I mean, it's the kind of death where clearly you would just be so terrified, you know, like how, like what else could your brain be? Like your, your brain's not going to be at peace. You know what mean? You're not in the fucking hospice, like chilling out going, okay, I think I'm ready to go. It's time to go. Yeah. You're going, holy fuck. This is how I go. this is how I fucking go. oh my fuck. like um Can you imagine?
Speaker: Jesus Christ. And imagine only being like 14 or 19 and having, that happen like it's very very sad it's very very sad it really is it's it's terrifying and get this get this it took 12 hours before rescuers could get to them oh god what a nightmare those poor kids jesus yeah terrible shout out to all the farmers out there love you we appreciate you and i hope that our government eventually learns how to take care of you Yeah. You know, Andrew, nothing says positive like a good old episode of Frege the 13th Horror Podcast. You know what I mean? Nothing says uplifting. Quite, quite like it.
Speaker: We're here to make your day brighter. We're here. We're queer. We're depressing. You know, so um listen, that's it. Andrew, anything else about cornfields? What do you think? No, I just think that like this was kind of ah just to give like a peek behind the curtain a little bit. This was kind of a stupid idea that I had for an episode that literally led me down so many wormholes that I'm like, I'm like actually like happy that we did because Andrew, Andrew, don't let them in on the secret that all of our ideas are stupid. Yeah, it's true. That's true.
Speaker: No, just it it became very fascinating the more and more I looked into it. so well and it And it opened itself up to great movies. Because, folks, we we're going to be talking about Children of the Corn Part 3 and Dark Harvest. And I think we're both going to have some really great things to say about those. So we'll leave it there for now because we're going to back in a moment with what you've been watching, bitch.
Speaker: Let's all go to the lobby. Let's all go to the lobby. Let's all go to the lobby to get ourselves a treat.
Speaker: And we're back with Whatcha Been Watching, bitch. Whatcha been watching, you corny little bitch. I like that, Andrew. That was a good one. Now listen, this is your first time with us on the show. is the segment where we talk about all the things we've been watching. So Andrew and I both have three things. I like, Andrew, how we've cut it down to three things, by the way. I think it's more concise. It's been a lot more manageable, I have to admit. So three things. We each have three things. Andrew, give us your first Whatcha Been Watching podcast. biatch my first one is don't know if you remember this but there was show called the terror couple of years ago i remember that it was like it was about it was ships and stuff wasn't it was yeah and then there was kind of like a a samurai season like yeah yeah yeah sure
Speaker: So this is the third season, but it was like, oh, cool. So this was unceremoniously like ah put just on Shudder through AMC+. plus It was kind of like a, they they'd literally show like AMC plus Shudder at the beginning of the episode. Like that's how it was released. Interesting.
Speaker: Get this main guy, Dan Stevens. Oh, no way. Main, main woman, Judith light. Oh, okay. I am watching this as soon as I can find it on whatever channels I have here. Hell yeah. And so it's basically about this guy who is kind of like a, I don't, I don't, deadbeat is not the right word, but he's kind of just like going through life. You know what i mean? Like he's just kind of like figuring it out. And he one day gets in a fight with his ah girlfriend's ex-husband because he sees that he sees her ah get abused by him and he takes, you know, action. And it just so happens that there is police like right in the vicinity and they take him in and he's like in a bunch of trouble. But instead of taking him to the police station, they kate they take him to this weird mental institution where Oh. And there's something weird about this Mendel Institution, and maybe it's feeding in a different way off of its inhabitants.
Speaker: Man, listen, it's only six episodes. It's really easy to take in. i i enjoyed it quite a bit. I liked it quite a bit. And I don't think a lot of people are privy to this because of the way that they released it. But it is a fun little six episode. It almost reminds me of back in the day. you remember when we used to get those like Stephen King, like ah like little series like on TV on like Saturday night where you'd see it in like two or three episodes. Saturdays or whatever. It reminded me of that.
Speaker: And maybe it was the way I ingested it, but like it was pretty fun, like trying to unravel the mystery. It's got a good little twist to it. And it was just, I don't know. It harkened back to something that I don't think that we get a lot where you just like,
Speaker: You've got to kind of think. You've got to like put your thinking cap on and you've got to like let the story tell it to you. And I really liked it. And I'm really surprised that it didn't get more fanfare because of the people that are in it. And I would highly encourage everyone, if you have a Shudder or AMC Plus or whatever you can find this on, I'm sure you know we have our AMC Plus through Amazon. I'm sure you can do it that way.
Speaker: ah look up the terror, the devil in silver. It was pretty fun, enjoyable experience. And listen, is Dan Stevens easy to watch? Yeah. Fuck yeah, he is. And like, also he's always fucking good. Like he is, there's never been a thing that he's been in that I did not like. yeah And like, I mean, we, we all, you know, kind of got to know him and love him through Downton Abbey. It's amazing like how ah versatile he has been in career. And then we got to lust after him during The Guest. so Oh, my God. The Guest. and guest
Speaker: i'm You know what? I'm glad you said that. I need to watch that again soon. very If you've never seen that before, you you need to fucking see it. I think our episode on The on the Guest is Impostors Are Terrifying. That had to be a long time ago, wasn't it? My goodness.
Speaker: um Folks, ah my first one is Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma. Have you heard about this, Andrew? Yeah, I'm very excited to see it it. It passed by so quick here, and now I'm just waiting for it to go on digital. It is fantastic. So we saw this at ah the Lighthouse Cinema.
Speaker: um ah Manuel went with me. um God love him. He can actually hear me saying this right now. His knowledge of films is not something that he can make money on. um But he loved this one. good So for somebody who's sort of new to these things, he liked it.
Speaker: I went wild over it. I thought it was so, so good. This is the third film from Jane Schoenbrun. um We've talked about ah we're all going to the World's Fair before. um The second movie um is I Saw the TV Glow. And this is her her third what or their third one. i I can't remember their pronouns right now, to be honest. um So it's Jane's third film. um the The cast in this one, casting in this one really goes up a notch, right? So Hannah Einbinder, who of course people know from a lot of things, but from Hacks most especially, and Gillian Anderson, who if you don't know who that is, you should stop listening to this podcast right now. um They're in it and they co-star. Yeah. And it's it's about Hannah Einbinder, who, um um I forget her character's name right now, but ah her character is a filmmaker.
Speaker: And she really wants to reboot um this old ah like slasher series, which is basically Friday the 13th, but it's called Camp Miasma. And so there are like you know all these you know sequels to Camp Miasma, but nothing is as good as the first one. And so now her character is looking to, you know, not just like, you know, create a sequel, but to like do something really thoughtful and really good. And so in order to do that, she has to go and meet Jillian Anderson's character, who was the scream queen survivor from the original Camp Miasma. Interesting. um And the the whole movie is a horror fan's wet dream because there are little nods and little inside jokes and little of this and little of that all over this thing. Everywhere in this movie is just like horror fan heaven. It's so fun.
Speaker: And that's just it is that it's fun. It's a fun movie. And it's it's it's hilarious. And it's also really touching and really thoughtful, which Jane Schoenbrun's films are are very much known for. um And there's all these like little stupid jokes. Like there's this, there's like this, this part where Hannah's character is texting her girlfriend back in LA or something like that. And like, they're talking about like, like some like events that they were, that, that the girlfriend was thinking about going to.
Speaker: And like, like, like one of the texts is like, um oh yeah, I'm thinking about going to this like a performance art piece called Fallujah bulk. And like, as soon as you see it, it's obviously a joke about Farooza Balk, which is fucking hilarious. Like that's, that is genuinely fucking funny.
Speaker: Um, and like, there's just like little things like that. Um, so it's a blast if you have not seen it yet, uh, and you're a horror fan, see it immediately, especially if you're a queer horror fan. It's so good. We had a blast seeing it.
Speaker: um And the lighthouse did a fun thing. I think, I think a lot of other ah places did this too, but they had like props from the movie out that you could take, but like like you you could like take photos with and like backdrops. And it was great. um So I, I, Andrew, I think you and Michael will adore it and everyone else. I think you'll like it a lot too. So be sure to watch teenage sex and death at camp. My asthma.
Speaker: Yeah, um I just I have like one clarifying question big for you specifically, but like, just knowing the that the movies that came before this from the same director, is this one a little more accessible to like a a hundred like a like a normie?
Speaker: One million percent. One million percent. And and i'm i'm glad I'm glad for it, too. not Not to belabor the point, but we've talked about this before. We're like, I liked we're all going to the World's Fair.
Speaker: And I liked i saw the TV glow. Yeah. But they they they are they are kind of confusing films, yeah if if I'm being honest. And like yeah this one is is not. like Don't get me wrong. It's meta. There's there's you know crazy twists. There's this. There's that. There are things that your brain has to really work through. But um in general, this one is, as you said, it's a lot more accessible, I think.
Speaker: Cool. I'm excited to see it. I think it just literally just released on digital. So soon soon to watch for me. Hell yeah. Yeah. All right. My next one is a surprise.
Speaker: ah There's this movie called Marshmallow. i guarantee you've never even heard of it. So yeah you you texted me about this. I have not seen it yet. I do want to see it. um Tell me all about it.
Speaker: So this is about a young boy. i would say like, I don't know. He's probably like 13 in the movie. And he has just gone through a horrific loss where he saw his grandpa die in front of him, like during like a dinner, likes like it's like very tragic thing. And this is his first like outing where his parents are sending him to summer camp and they're sending him to summer camp to like, just like,
Speaker: you know, you need to get away from all of this. You need to be with, you know, kids. You need to like, just be a kid, like just go to summer camp. Everything will be fine. Sure. And, ah it kind of follows like what you were talking about. It kind of follows like the typical summer camp thing. There are bullies, there are crushes, there are like things that happen. Um, and then,
Speaker: there's one night where they're telling the story. It's so typical, but like telling the story of like, oh, the summer camp slasher and dot, dot, dot, dot. Sure. And then, it and then it starts to become true and it goes from there. And what I'm telling you, it sounds like a typical movie, but there is a twist in this and I'm not, I'm not going to give anything away. Okay. But just keep in mind, there is a twist in this.
Speaker: that I did not see coming for a million miles away. oh And to to me, when a movie does that, because I mean, like, let's, let's see here. 169 times two movies. That's what but ah ah we've, we've covered so many movies on this podcast and then seeing so many movies outside of that. So when a movie does surprise me like this movie did,
Speaker: I had to text you immediately and I had to say, you got to watch this because there's something in here that is so crazy that I, I, my, it was like my jaw was on the floor for the first time. Holy shit. Wow. Like it was very good. I look forward to seeing that.
Speaker: It's a very small cast. It's a very unknown cast. Like it's, it's, I don't even know what I would have kin it to because like it's, there's nobody in here that you know, but like yeah the kid, the kid actors are good. Everything is good, but there's just something about this one.
Speaker: that i I loved it. And I don't even know how I remember hearing about this movie. I remember somebody saying that it was in their top 10 of last year. And I remember just like scrolling and we found it. and was like, oh, I kind of think I heard something about this. And we watched it and I'm so glad I did. And I just want to spread the word that this movie is a standout. in and That's awesome. it that you're looking for. So if you're finding yourself looking for something, I think you can go on either Amazon or Paramount Plus and I think you can find it if you're a subscriber for free. So go and watch Marshmallow.
Speaker: Cool. I definitely will. My next one, Andrew, is The Land Before Time. Oh, wait, at the dinosaur movie? Oh, yeah, yeah, So, look, I have been watching this since I was a child, um and I had been waiting this year to watch it because obviously, like but like most children that were born in my in my era of of of human existence, um this is probably the movie ah that was like the Bambi for our generation, right? Yeah, Devastation Station. Devastation Station. This is the one where you learned about, op one day your parents are going to die. this is the movie where you learn that. And so, you know, this came out when I was four years old. It came out in 1986 1988. Pardon me. So I was six years old. And um I think from the time it came out, but I was watching it and I loved it. Absolutely. ah Like most people.
Speaker: adored the land before time. um And my mom knew that knew that I liked it too and stuff. So, you know, i I had been waiting to watch it this year could just for the right time, especially if we're not dying earlier earlier this year. And it was finally at the right time a few nights ago. And it felt good to watch it again. and of course I cried. how can you There's no way you that you can't cry watching this if you're if you're a human being. and um And it was wonderful. And if you don't know the story of Land Before Time, it is basically, as Andrew said, dinosaurs. And um they are a group of, what is it? One, two, three, four, five, like, like kid dinosaurs. So like, they're they're like little kids.
Speaker: And they all have their parents, of course, and like their herd. And one day, um As they're, you know, in their little dinosaur land, a great earthquake comes and the earthquake like separates the land in such a way that like all the kids are, ah they are um ah scattered from their parents. And all that any of these kids know is they need to get to a place called the Great Valley. And in the Great Valley, there will be trees and plenty of vegetation and because theyre all these are all dinosaurs that that eat plants.
Speaker: um There'll be plenty of leaves to eat and tree stars and water, and they're going to absolutely love it. And they only know that because Littlefoot's mom, before she died, told him that the Great Valley existed and that you find it by just walking towards the sun.
Speaker: And so that's what they do. And it's a lovely story. they They have to overcome all these different odds and they become good friends and all of it. It's just, it's beautiful. If you've never seen Lamb Before Time, which I just can't believe if you're an adult, you should see the Lamb Before Time.
Speaker: it's It's fantastic. Hopefully it warms your heart. Funny thing that I don't think you knew about me, but I had a parakeet as a child named Petrie. Petrie, of course you did. That's it. it's Lovely. what What a name. It was it was Sarah Littlefoot, Petrie, Ducky, and Skuh.
Speaker: Who's the big guy? No, you you had me at Sarah and Petrie. That's all I remember. I can't remember the the the um the Sarah, not Reuter.
Speaker: um Oh, I can't remember now, Andrew, but whoever that the the the the fifth one was, he was good too. There you go. ah What a weird metaphor for heaven.
Speaker: I know. The Great Valley. um All right. My last one is a movie that came out in May and it was like ah a flash in the pan, literally like it was in theaters for maybe a week and then it was out.
Speaker: and I've always been meaning to see it because guess it's guess what? It stars our good pal Alex Esso. Oh, I love Alex Esso. Wonderful. And this is the movie Pitfall.
Speaker: Cool. ah If that sounds familiar, it's kind of a play on Pitfall, the video game. Yeah, sure. Yes, absolutely. When we were kids on the Atari. um And this is ah basically about a group of people Um, most of all, a brother sister duo who, ah years earlier lost their parents in a tragic car accident, which in, in which they were in the car with them. Like it was, it's a whole thing. You just, just watch the movie. How fun to be traumatized.
Speaker: Yeah. and this is kind of like they're coming back together, like as brother sister and they both have like a partner at this point and they're all coming together to do like a hike. They're going to all go on a hike, like a three day hike. Um,
Speaker: And they got into the woods, but little do they know that there is a hunter in these woods and he has, you know, set traps. And one of them is the pit with it's it's it's a classic like, like, the pit with the stakes in there. And one of them gets trapped in one of those pits. And the rest of the movie is like everyone else trying to find this person. And I'm not giving anything away. sure But like, that's kind of the crux of the movie.
Speaker: Here's what I'll say. Watch this at your own risk because it's not great. um I think that Alex Esso is doing her very best to make whatever she's in be good because I think she's one of the most under celebrated like,
Speaker: actresses in the horror community. If I'm just, I've, and this is, listen, have we talked to her personally and have we had interactions with her personally? Yes. But I just think that she's great and everything she's in. love her to death.
Speaker: Even if the movie is not great, she still is. And so i would encourage you to watch this. Do I think it's a little over long and a little, and do they concentrate on the wrong character because there's there's a brother character And there's a, there's a side character that I just, I don't know. They're just don't do it for me when it's concentrated on her. And because in the movie, she has some addiction issues that she's getting over. And sure of course she's going through like the loss of parents and dah, dah, dah, dah. But like, she's really good in it.
Speaker: I just think that like the supporting cast around her is just not doing their jobs. um and'm so sorry to hear that. That sucks. And so like I would still, it's on, it's on Amazon prime. If you have an account, you can watch it for free. Um, I'd say still watch it, but it's, it's not my strongest encouragement for a movie. That's fair. But I'm, but I, but I'm always going to like, I'm always going to be behind Alex S.O. and anything she does. And so like, did I need to watch this? Absolutely.
Speaker: Is it something I'm going to go back to again? Probably. i don't know. Yeah. Yeah. So, fair Andrew, my final one is on Netflix right now. It just came out. It's called Unabomber. And surprise, it's about the Unabomber. This one has a pretty good cast. It's got Russell Crowe, Shalane Woodley, and it's got Jacob Tremblay, who folks will know from um from from a lot of things. He was in Room, but he also played, if you remember Dr. Sleep, he's the baseball playing kid.
Speaker: Yeah, very precocious kid actor who is now an adult, which is weird. Yeah, I think he's 20 now. I'm pretty sure. something like that um Yeah, and it is weird to see him grown up. It's it's like a bizarre thing. um But he plays young Ted Kaczynski in this. So he is he is the young Unabomber at Harvard and and in other ah climes. um showing you know how how Ted Kaczynski developed into the person that he became. um It's really good.
Speaker: i i really enjoyed this. um It's not all that long. It's 101 minutes. Like I said, it's on Netflix. um you know Look, you you probably know the story of the Unabomber, basically. I think most of us probably do. Um, but it was really interesting to learn more about like his family life in this and just learn a little bit more about, you know, some of the things that very clearly, influenced the, the, the person that he would become and why, why he thought those things basically.
Speaker: And, um, It was good. You know, like I don't want to give too much away, of course, but I mean, look, you you all kind of know how it ends. um But I did really enjoy this one. So Unabomber, you can watch that on Netflix. Highly recommend.
Speaker: Yeah, I think like those kind of stories in in this in this day and age are really important to me. I agree. But I think that like we are so concentrated on, and I'm talking about the U.S. specifically, we are so concentrated on making the quote-unquote other the terrorist. And 90% of the time, the terrorists are us.
Speaker: And yeah I think that's important stuff to remember. so yeah You know, I mean... that they The Unabomber is not all that far away from ah Luigi Mangione. It's not all that far away from you know the guy that, whoever the people are that killed Charlie Kirk and this thing and that thing, whatever.
Speaker: You know, they're all connected in one way or another. And yeah a lot of it is... Or the pulse gun person. Like, it yeah it all it is all connected. And it's something that we breed into the United States. And we don't recognize that we actually are doing it. We just say, oh, no, it's the other. It's the other. It's the other. I i agree. i And i I think at the end of the day, you know, look, um in a very strange connection to 9-11. Here we go. Like, I think that the the the terrorists from Al-Qaeda who attacked America on won.
Speaker: And it wasn't because they, they bombed the twin towers or they, or not bombed, but they flew the planes into, of course. And, you know, this is speaking, you know, 25 years later, it's not because they flew the planes into the twin towers or they flew a plane into the Pentagon or they crashed a plane in Pennsylvania um or that they, you know, cause us to have a war after that, that we, you know, chose to get into in a lot of stupid ways or this or this or this.
Speaker: I think they won because without that, we wouldn't have the same sort of paranoid society that we have today because of the Patriot Act and because of this and because of the Tea Party. Think of all the terrible things that happened after 9-11. almost like that nine eleven almost like like enabled to happen. You know what i mean? Agreed. Yeah. I think about that all the time. Like all this stuff just connects and these paranoiacs that then act out in such strange ways. Like, you know, frankly, Ted Kaczynski did like, it's crazy stuff, man. It really is. yeah And it's, it's not getting better anytime soon.
Speaker: Go out and vote, people. Go out and vote. Yeah, it is a ah dangerous mindfuck to think about, but I totally agree with you. yeah So listen, folks, that does it for what you've been watching, bitch. Andrew brought us The Devil in Silver on AMC+, plus Marshmallow, which is on Paramount+, plus and Pitfall on Amazon Prime.
Speaker: And Maddie brought us Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma, which is now in theaters and in the United States. I think literally just released on digital. i think it's on streaming everywhere now, too. Yeah.
Speaker: ah The Land Before Time, which look it up. I'm sure you'll find it. You'll find it. And The Unabomber on Netflix. So, folks, we'll take a little break here and be right back with our first film of the episode, Children of the Corn 3, Urban Harvest.
Speaker: Based on the short story by Stephen King, the master of horror, the terror began in the fields.
Speaker: Then it grew stronger. Now, evil is about to show its face once again. Bill and Amanda Porter have just adopted two boys from the country.
Speaker: Modest dress is the surest way to a pious life. They seemed like nice boys. Let us give thanks to he who walks behind the rows. Don't worry about We'll get the hang of this.
Speaker: But the porters have no idea who they've just taken into their home.
Speaker: Prepare yourself for the third and most terrifying chapter.
Speaker: Children of the Corn 3 Urban Harvest. Like my pa always said, you reap what you sow.
Speaker: Before there was Malachi, and now there's Eli. Andrew, tell us all about Children of the Corn 3 Urban Harvest. In the heart of a city, an adult nightmare is about to be reborn.
Speaker: Two brothers who escaped the cult of Gatlin, Nebraska, are taken in by a Chicago couple. But young preacher Eli brings the corn with him. in an abandoned factory, he plants a sacred crop and begins recruiting the city's kids in the name of he who walks behind the rose. Yeah. The Harvest Has Come to the Inner City, directed by James D.R. Hickox, written by Dodie Levinson. Who the hell knows? And production distribution were handled by Dimension Films, which I forgot all about. You know it's going to be good. When you when you see Dimension flash across the screen, you know it's going to be good. Yeah. Also handled by Park Avenue Productions and Buena Vista Home Video because this is direct-to-video release. Yep. um
Speaker: Eli Porter is played by Daniel Cerny. Joshua Porter is played by Ron Melendez. William Porter is played by Jim Metzler. Amanda Porter is played by Nancy Lee Gran. And Father Frank Nolan is played by Michael Ensign. This is rated R. It comes in at 92 minutes. It was released on September 12th of 1995.
Speaker: Direct-to-video locations were set in Chicago, Illinois. And this one, because it was direct-to-video, budget was not included. This is not a first-time watch for me, but i'm i think it is a first-time watch for Maddie. So please, Maddie, tell me. Tell me all about your first interaction with Urban Harvest. Oh my God. This movie is so stupid and I love it. it's it's It truly is absolutely dumb. um So like, I mean, it it's it is it's like pure 90s, this movie too. Just pure 90s in so many ways. It's pure 90s in the clothes.
Speaker: It's pure 90s in the style. It's pure 90s in like the way that the film is made. It's pure 90s in the way that it thinks about like country versus urban and what those things look like, how they sound. like even so even Even the trailer that they live like she's but lived in is like a stream, like as what do you call those? Like a streamliner? Is that what you call those things? Yeah.
Speaker: ah It's not even like a traditional trailer. like that we Because i I had many years in a trailer that was like kind of like the permanent trailer. Yeah, sure. you know So it's it's it's ah it's a it's a funny little movie. And it's funny mostly.
Speaker: Because these two boys, right? These two boys who are now orphaned and they are half brothers. We're sort of not even. They're not even that. They're adopted. Right. So and wait, which it's Eli. And what's the brother's name again? Joshua? Joshua. Yeah, Joshua.
Speaker: um So you've got these two boys and like Eli is younger. Joshua is older. You're sort of meant to believe that they're not that much older though. Right. Right. I would say like a 13, 17 14, 17 type of Yeah. and That makes sense. Maybe even and That kind of makes sense to me. So like they they are ah they're orphaned because they get their the Joshua's dad in in whatever cornfield they're in in Gatlin. In Nebraska. Yeah, in Nebraska. they are His dad is an an asshole. He's crazy. He's going after him with a shotgun and shit.
Speaker: And they're running through a cornfield to get away well he's running through a cornfield get away from him. And then Eli pops up. And Eli's like, don't worry. I'll take care of it. And so he grabs he grabs the the the corn by black Bible. yeah The black Bible. It's a corn Bible.
Speaker: It's got corn on the front of it. It's corn. It's got a cross. And I don't know why the cross is in I'll be perfectly honest. It's basically the devil. Yeah. You got the... There's a cross and a pentagram, which is yeah totally funny to me.
Speaker: And it's all made out of corn. You know, this is like classic, you know, if you if you're from Indiana, you get it. But if you're not, maybe you don't. But this is how we do crafts there. Anyways, ah Eli saves Joshua by by the dad getting killed by the corn. He who walks behind the rose kills him using the corn. And then the the book is buried underneath there. So it will stay safe.
Speaker: um And ah then these kids got to go somewhere because they're orphans. right like they're orphans the dad's gone so of course they get shipped to the inner city and they get off a bus and they meet these two rich white people from chicago who have they've been waiting for a baby so they don't get a baby they get two troubled teenage boys um and it is insane because eli is as gay as the day is long like so there is yeah There is no way anybody is looking at this kid. It's like it's like me. Anyone who who thought I was straight as a child, like, are you okay? Are you all right? Is something wrong with you? It's the same thing here. This kid, listen, he's he's thinking about one thing and it's not girls. I got news for you. It's Joshua. It's Joshua. That's who he's thinking of. Like, what is going on? And, like, look maybe that was just, maybe they wanted to cast it that way. I mean, look, let's take a bath to Children of the Corn or Ridge.
Speaker: You've got Malachi, who, are not Malachi, you've got, um um oh, what's his damn name? the ming The main guy? Yeah. Not Malachi, but literally all I can think of is the line where he goes, he wants you to Malachi. Yes. I can't think of his damn name, but it's the main, the main guy from children of the corn one also extremely gay, like, come on. And, and like little. So like clearly they modeled it after, after that.
Speaker: got I gotta, I gotta find that. Of course our listeners are going to be like, how do you guys have a horror podcast and not know the fucking name? um So like they must have ah Isaac. isaac du They must have modeled the the casting for Eli off of the casting for Isaac.
Speaker: That kind of makes sense. um But yeah, I mean, that's that is the thing about the movie that just will continue and stay with you as you watch the entire thing is how is this gay kid going?
Speaker: fucking like starting this cult in his his high school. And how is he that fucking evil? It's crazy. It's absolutely crazy. But beyond that, you know, look, the the film is is very clearly a product of the 90s. Duh. There's no way around that.
Speaker: But it is stupid in a way that you kind of love it. And it's also, like, to be fair, it it is kind of inventive. Like, it takes the story of Children of the Corn.
Speaker: It inserts it into 90s capitalism, right? And, like, you know, kind of tries to find a way through that. Because the movie is also about the um the the adopt the the adopted dad, however you say that, stepdad or whatever. um That guy is um Taking advantage. he He is a commodities broker, right? And so, you know, obviously in Chicago, there's the Board of Trade and part of the Board of Trade is um is is dealing in commodities like corn or soybeans or whatever. And so when little Eli takes to their their backyard of their house, which is probably like an I don't know, Oak Park or something like that. oh you mean the abandoned factory next door? oh my God. And how they, oh yeah, well, there's that factory there. We built a wall. like
Speaker: And it's the wall is fucking huge. Anyways, he in the in the backyard, um he is like you know growing some fucking corn, right? And so this adopted dad discovers, oh, this corn is like really strong. It can survive all these things. He gets to thinking, oh, God, this corn would be great to sell, wouldn't And so suddenly the story becomes about more than just he who walks behind the rose. It's also a little bit about the eels of capitalism, which I think that's kind of cool. So, and, and like, look, the movie is so goofy in so many ways that you can't, you can't help but laugh at it. So I think this is one where you're either going to look at this and go, this is absolutely so fucking stupid. I hate it.
Speaker: Or you're going to go, this is absolutely so fucking stupid. I kind of love it. And I'm in the latter. Yeah. um This is not my first time with urban harvest. um This is actually, if I'm, if I'm really going down the road of like children of the corn, which I've seen a smattering of, I've seen, you know, a, a, a number of them, but could you tell, could I tell you like, which one's, which one? no' Probably not fair.
Speaker: um But children of the corn three urban harvest really does stand out to me. And I, I want to, encourage people to seek this one out because it's actually a really good time of a movie like especially if you want just like ah like you you know you you encapsulated it perfectly but if you just want like that time capsule of like the 90s like this is a perfect example ah and i think that I think this one's a little under celebrated because the over the topness of fucking ah Eli is so fucking it's funny insane like it's insane
Speaker: Like there is one line where he is so obsessed with his adoptive brother that he's that while they're sleeping in the same bed, mind you, a twin bed. he says to him, you said you'd never leave me.
Speaker: And now you're playing their games. Oh, my God. He's such a little jealous bitch. And he and he has. i mean, and like, look, Josh is cute. Like, there's no way around that. Like out out of the two of them, he's going to be the cute one. Well, and he's got the floppy bangs. You gotta to get yeah got to give the floppy bangs something. he he has He has floppy, blonde, 90s hair.
Speaker: His shirt is off for a quarter of the movie. He plays basketball. He's sporty, all that kind of stuff. Like, clearly, Eli has a crush on this guy that is not actually his brother in any way.
Speaker: Yeah. um And there's some like there's something weirdly like... um I don't know. There's just something identifiable in this movie that like brings me back to like certain time, like watching movies like, I don't know, Beethoven or like those weird, like nineties movies where this one just like, it's like the horror version of that. And i just think it's so funny that like,
Speaker: he So we come to understand that Eli can basically make anyone see whatever he wants them to see. It's yes ah it's it's ah manipulated through the wife where he makes her see all the bugs like instead of the corn. like he can like make things happen. But his power is so...
Speaker: It's so unlimited, but so limited. It's very weird, like, what he's able to do. I would say that if if there are... if if there I mean, we have to find something to criticize.
Speaker: Like, that that is definitely one of the things that just doesn't make any sense, is like, like what is he he can kind of do he can kind of do whatever he wants in this, to And then there are...
Speaker: some limitations to what he can do that that don't make sense because we don't know the extent of what he can really do. So like it is it's uneven in that way.
Speaker: yeah But you know all that being said, it's one of the things that you kind of overlook. So here's my question that I wanted to pose to you. ah In the run time of the movie, we get a lot of flashbacks to the original massacre.
Speaker: ah Maybe even, i think, some scenes from Children of the Corn 2. But we see like the kids killing their parents, like essentially. We never see Malachi.
Speaker: Or I'm sorry, not Malachi, Isaac. We never see Isaac. So are we to believe that he is the reincarnation of Isaac or is he just a follower of Isaac that is now um strangely eternal? Because we see ah news articles that he was alive in the 1960s. And so I just wanted to get your take on that, on what you thought Eli is or isn't, I guess. That's a good, I hadn't really thought of it that way, but now, now you've got me thinking, um, and maybe that's so also why he's gay. Yeah, that's what I mean.
Speaker: You know, like maybe, maybe that's the answer. You know what, Andrew, I have no idea. I really, and it's, it's one of the things that it doesn't, it it certainly doesn't answer that in the film. Right. Um, so I don't know, but I, I think that's, uh, it's a, it's a, an interesting way to view it. I think it does also answer, you know, a little bit of like, well,
Speaker: Okay, you you've got these two kids, once again, who are from the same place, basically. And, you know, one of them is hyper religious, and one of them is just like religious in the way that probably a lot of kids that are that come from that part of the country are.
Speaker: Yeah, like a Sunday church kid. 100%. But the other one is like basically a preacher in training. yeah um and like like he he He out-sermonizes the Catholic priest at and in that one scene. It's so funny. It's it's hilarious. Maybe you want to come up here and do it. And then he fucking does. um But like you maybe that's maybe that's the reason why. you know Maybe that's why he has that knowledge. it's you know It's just continued on. I think that's an interesting theory.
Speaker: Yeah, I don't know. It was just something that struck me this time because they hearken back to the original massacre quite a bit, like through the flashbacks of the of the Catholic priest. And so I just didn't know if like we're supposed to understand that either he was part of the cult or is he like a resurrection of Isaac. But it never really truly answers question. Never answers, yeah. So I don't know what to take it. couple of things I have in my notes. ah I had my notes, I was like...
Speaker: wow, there's actually a score to this movie, which is kind of crazy for a 1995 direct to video. Yeah. um I thought it was funny. But also some other things in here too, right? So like the Nicholas Brendon was actually in this movie too.
Speaker: um he was he was and and ivana milicevic plus an uncredited charlie's throne one of eli's followers um stephen king reportedly liked this installment more than uh the earlier sequel which the only other their earlier sequel was children of the corn 2 the final sacrifice um And ah the first film in the series to go straight to video and then first released under dimension films um shot for about a year, which is kind of crazy. That's a long shoot time. um And then didn't. Oh, wait. No, it didn't. I lied.
Speaker: I'm looking at the dates wrong. From December 93 to January 94. I'm an idiot. ah But then didn't reach video shelves until September of 1995. Apparently, which is interesting. Huh.
Speaker: Oh, and also one more thing, Andrew, I did pull up the list of sequels. There's a lot of them. There's seven on Amazon Prime alone. Yeah. So here they are, folks. You've got, you got, you have the OG. Then you've got two, the final sacrifice, three urban harvest, which we're talking about now for the gathering from 96, five fields of terror from 98. There is children of the corn, six, six, six Isaac's return from 1999. Uh,
Speaker: Children of the Corn Revelation 2001. Children of the Corn, again, it's a made-for-TV remake that was on SyFy, apparently, from 2009. Children of the Corn Genesis in 2011. Children of the Corn Runaway in 2018. And Children of the Corn, once again, prequel reboot from 2023. That's lot. That's ton. Yeah.
Speaker: that's a ton yeah Yeah, but i think like i think this one stands out amongst the crowd. like I really do. and Clearly. um I think that it's based upon Eli and him being so over the top, but it's also the the effects in this. like Okay, so the effects in this, when they're good, are really good.
Speaker: like I think so too. yeah I think that like ah you know we have to call out Screaming Mad George, which ah if you've listened to our episodes before, you know him from Society, that movie. Sure.
Speaker: um So you know that he has ah has ah he has an eye for these kind of things. And I'm telling you, like when you don't when you don't expect the gore in this movie, the gore is on full attention. like I hadn't watched this in a long time, so I kind of forgot that the mom was one of the first victims. Yeah.
Speaker: And when she falls back on that spigot. Oh, it's terrible. Oh my God. And then, and then they show her face more than like 10 seconds of like water coming through her bloody head. It's a fuck. It's fucking awful. It's terrible.
Speaker: And then the way that they dispatch of Malcolm, the next door neighbor who has the longest spine we've ever seen of any person. Yeah, true. Yeah. It's just like you don't you don't expect like a made-for-TV movie, or not a made-for-TV, made-for-video movie to have this consistent of of effects.
Speaker: And then we cut to the end where... Eli has now transformed into what I can only say is a stock monster. Some kind of fucking monster. It's crazy.
Speaker: And there is a point where he picks up our main protagonist's love interest. I can't think of her name right now. And it is so clearly like a Barbie doll that ah like, and I'm just like, oh, did we run out of budget? Like what happened here? Because the rest of the effects are so good that when it's so bad that I completely agree, what is happening? Completely agree. I totally agree. And and honestly, i i honestly think this movie is pretty great in a weird like in a weird way up until like the 80-minute mark. And then when that monster comes out and they kill the dad so like disparagingly, and all of a sudden Eli can shoot flamethrowers, I'm just like, okay, well, this is why this movie is not memorable to most people because it just...
Speaker: it really does fall apart in the fourth act, if you will. Well, and they they definitely stole a little effect from Hocus Pocus because they had like the the moment towards the end when when when they're fighting amongst all the other kids. And he's like he's like blasting out the shit and he uses the book to to pass it back kind of thing. yeah Straight out of Hocus Pocus, number one right there. um And also in a little, and a little bit like Carrie too, because it's kind of like massacre of like totally end cult people. So, and can we also talk about how this movie ends in Hamburg, Germany? Can we talk about that? Oh God. And then the corn is in Germany. Like it's like the, this is the, maybe the only, I haven't watched a lot of the other sequels. So this might be the only one that goes international. I'm not, maybe it is better literally all the other ones are in Nebraska. Yeah.
Speaker: I mean, like this one, you know, goes to Chicago and then it goes all the way to Germany. How, um you know, how, how bold is that for these filmmakers? I mean, look, it's, it's a, this isn't going to win a fucking, you know, Oscar, ah but it's, it is genuinely good to watch. And like, I, I didn't usually, I kind of hate that kind of thing. As you all know, I didn't hate this. I had a great time watching it. I really did.
Speaker: Yeah, i think I think it's honestly because we see a little bit of ourselves in Eli. but Yeah, you know what? Probably. That is true. and Andrew, what did you rate Children of the Corn 3 Urban Harvest?
Speaker: Listen, i i know this is sounding a little bit generous, but I gave Children of the Corn 3 Urban Harvest a four and a half. And I said, i don't know. it sings in its stupidness, and I kind of couldn't get enough. Just wish more Chicago was involved because we literally only get like skyline views of Chicago. Yeah. I do agree on the Chicago part. Andrew, I also gave it four and a half. And I decided this is so campy and silly. I couldn't help but love it. So folks, there it is. We have a dual four and a half out of sevens on this one, which is kind of crazy. um But that's it. So that means that for your spooky time ah watching, you should watch Children with a Corn 3, Urban Harvest. Go ahead and give it a watch.
Speaker: Folks, stay tuned. We'll be right back with our second film of the episode, Dark Harvest.
Speaker: It's Halloween.
Speaker: You know what that means.
Speaker: Old sawtooth Jack is gonna rise from the cornfields. It's gotta be stopped. Kill or be killed. You've all heard the stories.
Speaker: We failed at our duties and that black dust destroyed our crops, our lives. It must die so we can live.
Speaker: Your sacred duty is to take down Sawtooth Jack before that church bell rings at midnight. You really think that's real? I saw it.
Speaker: It's real.
Speaker: You saw it Did you kill it then let's go kill it
Speaker: You should do it, you know, I'm not allowed just because your brother won the run last year I got an idea If that thing isn't dead by midnight this whole town is going straight to hell and wanna go home. I wanna go home. You think you're special.
Speaker: Why are you doing this? you're born in this town, you're cursed. I'm ending this. Tonight. It ain't over.
Speaker: We're not bringing you into the light. Unfortunately, we're bringing into the dark. And that's dark harvest. Maddie, tell us all about dark harvest. Evil Stalks Halloween night, 1963. In a small Midwestern town in Illinois, the local boys take part in a yearly ritual known as The Run.
Speaker: Sawtooth Jack, a pumpkin headed creature grown in the fields is loose until midnight and whoever brings him down wins a chance at a new life.
Speaker: Everyone else just has to survive the night. Dark Harvest is directed by David Slade, written by Michael Gillo, based on the novel by Norman Partridge, produced by ah Matt Tolmach Productions and MGM, distributed by MGM. Richie Shepard is played by Casey Lykes. Kelly Haynes, played by Amiri Crutchfield. Officer Jerry Ricks, played by Luke Kirby. Donna Shepard, played by Elizabeth Reaser. And Dan Shepard, played by Jeremy Davies. The film is rated R. It's 96 minutes long out of the USA. Released October 11th, 2023 for an Alamo Drafthouse special engagement. I still have not been to an Alamo Drafthouse and it pisses me off. um And it came out on Prime Video in October of that same year. So just a couple days later. Filmed in Manitoba, ah in Winnipeg, and Beaux-et-Jours. not entirely sure. And of course, this was straight to um straight to video, basically. So there's no budget and no no gross information available for you. Andrew, I don't know this was the first time for you. It was for me.
Speaker: No, I've actually seen this before. um I think this was like one of those random Shudder movies, if I remember correctly. But like, this was one of those Shudder movies that like stood out to me where I was like, there this is actually a good one.
Speaker: and And I'm kind of spoiling my my rating and stuff here. But like, I just think... Going into this movie and you don't know what you're going to get is such a surprise.
Speaker: Yep. And is such a inventive idea because it kind of takes, I don't know, it kind of takes like the ideas of like the Hunger Games, but also like...
Speaker: old timey stuff and it gives it like a new lens but then there's a twist on top of the twist which we'll we'll get to and I just think that this is like a wholly like original idea which you don't see a lot and we agree I think that this is an under celebrated direct to prime or whatever you want to call it video like movie. And I want encourage to encourage more people to see it because, you know, you know, you pause the episode here if you haven't watched it, but like there's some good twists and turns here that I didn't see coming and had kind of forgot about until I like watched it again. And so like overall, I think this is like a spooky, ooky, good time. I think the creature effects are really cool. I think there's some good like scares in here. And there's some like surprisingly sadistic deaths in this that I- Incredibly sadistic. Like I forgot about like, for instance, there is a ah scene where there is a bunker of children who are like kind of like the more like passive in this in this ah this this mill of of children who have to go and hunt down Sawtooth Jack and they get fucking slaughtered. Slaughtered. and Truly slaughtered.
Speaker: But that's my overall take. We can get into like the the details of the movie when we talk more about it. But i'm'm I'm more interested in someone like you who this is maybe a first time watch and sure kind of didn't know what you're getting yourself into going into it. And like, I want you to tell people how it made you feel and what you kind of saw from like this being a new modern Halloween essential.
Speaker: Yeah. So, um, I, I, I really enjoyed this. I had a great, I had no idea what it was before. Um, so I, I went in blind, which, which once again, if you haven't,
Speaker: watch this yet, you really should stop listening and and go watch the movie right now. like don't Don't listen to us talk about it right now because you you don't want to be spoiled. And um and i I think, not speaking for you, Andrew, you but I think we probably both believe that this is one that's really worth it. um And ah first of all,
Speaker: just being in spooky time right now. um It's a great film to bring you into the holidays to the holiday season. But for us, this is the holiday season um into the Halloween season. It's just it's just one of those films that just gives you that feel that atmosphere, just that vibe of Jack-o-lanterns. It's fall. Yeah, just it just feels good like that in the same way that like watching trick or treat does that for me. You know what i mean? yeah It's the same kind of feeling. um So why did I like Dark Harvest? I like Dark Harvest because first of all, I think the story is original.
Speaker: I think it's bold. And i think it's a great idea. So to go over the story, you have this small town in Illinois called Bastion. And in Bastion, Illinois, there is, as you've already heard here, this annual thing called The Run. And in The Run, the kids need... And you and you don't learn everything about The Run at the start. You only learn a little bit.
Speaker: So yeah the the movie opens with the run going on. And so the run is happening and we only kind of see the end of it. And at the end of it, there is this one kid who, ah you know, finds the the the thing that they've all been chasing and kills the thing.
Speaker: And they kill the thing in front of the church in this little town Illinois. And he then like like rips into this bean because you don't know quite what it is. And like he starts eating from it. But it's the way that they film it, it's kind of hard to tell like what is he eating? Like is he eating a heart? Is he eating something? You get the hint of like, wait a minute, did I just see – Is that candy? Is that candy wrapping? Yeah. yeah but but But you're not entirely sure that it is. They do that really, really well. They give you just enough hints and then they pull it away so that you can learn more like like by dribs and drabs throughout the rest of the movie. And so this kid is the winner. They they go into the hall and in the hall in the church, they they give this kid and his family they're like, oh, you guys are going to get a new house and here's a check for, I think it was like $25,000. And by the way, this kid gets to go, he like he gets to go be our ambassador to the rest of the world. And gets a Corvette. Yeah. And a brand new Chevy Corvette and they give him the keys and then he gets in the car and he drives off. And then ah before he drives off though, the brother is like, please take me with you. And he's like, ah, I can't, I'll see you later. Kind of thing. So he gets in the car.
Speaker: He says, no stop signs on the black road. And then he goes out there and that's the last we see of him. And we're meant to believe that through letters and postcards, he's out there having fun in New Orleans and he's in California and whatever. But no one knows.
Speaker: And so then the idea of the next run is coming up. And his brother gets the idea that, well, i I got to get out of here too. If that's the way I get out of here, get out of this little town, then you know what? but that's the thing that That's the thing that you kind of learn throughout the movie is that people can't leave. like They can't leave or once you leave. Once you are in Bastion, you can't leave.
Speaker: for for and But they don't really know why, right? yeah It's just like understood. And so then the little brother starts to get ready and preparing for for the run this year and runs into like, you know, the town bullies and, you know, meets a girl that he probably likes who is the the concession stand girl at the at the at the cinema in town and this and that and the other thing and and all the rest of it. And then when you go through the run this time, you really see...
Speaker: just how depraved and wild it is. And so, you know, ah among the other things that you were listing before, like like Hunger Games and whatever, The Purge is also clearly a um a and an influence on this movie. Because it's sort of like on Halloween, when they go to do the run, like the kids can do whatever they want out out there. And no one's going to stop them.
Speaker: Well, and they also starve them for three days. Yeah. So they're totally starving. They're wild. It's just it's it's supposed to be only boys. The girls aren't aren't allowed to participate. And so they're out there. They're ravenous. They're hormonal. They're fucking crazy. And so they're looting and they're doing this and they're doing that. And they're also like killing each other.
Speaker: Like just just fucking killing each other. And it it is brutal how they kill each other. But they are all in pursuit of Sawtooth Jack because they know that if they find him and they kill him, They're the ones that win.
Speaker: That's the only way out. Yeah, exactly. And in and i'll I'll stop this in a minute. But in the course of it, obviously, our hero, Richie, is the one who does eventually find Sawtooth Jack and whatever. Who is the who is the brother of the previous winner.
Speaker: Exactly. He realizes when he looks at the belt buckle that, oh, That's my brother's belt buckle. How would he have that on? And he starts thinking, what if that's my brother? And then all of a sudden, it just becomes an ongoing thing where he starts to learn, oh, the sawtooth Jack every single year is the kid who won the year before. They truly never escape. They never escape. And so for whatever reason, we don't learn all the lore, but I'm okay with that. This town has a belief that And it's the it's the Harvester's Guild. The Harvester's Guild runs this place, and their belief is that as long as this program continues, tradition, that they will have good crops every year. And if they don't do this, then the town is going to fail, and they'll they'll all be dead or whatever the fuck. Well, they'll get, what do they call it? Like the black storm or whatever. It's like a dust storm. Yeah. yeah And so that is the the lore behind this. And there it is. and And when you learn it all, it is sort of like, wow, that's a pretty cool fucking idea. And the way that it plays out is wonderful. You know, this takes place in 1963 and it feels like it all over the place. So, you know, from their clothes to the cars to the way that they talk. they do a really good job of stylizing this film in a way that I think really works very, very well. Yeah, bitchin'. Bitchin'. And, you know, like, the guy who directed it also directed Hard Candy, also directed 30 Days of Night, which you and love. Oh, all right. So David david Slade is, he's British and it's he's he's no newbie to films. He's no slacker here. He's no slacker. But also, you know, listen, this is a cast of mostly people that you don't know, except for Jeremy Davies and the mom who's named, ah ah she's been in other stuff, Elizabeth Reiser. But if you see her face, you like, oh, I've seen her before. Those are those are like character actors that you are like, oh, I know who they are, but I don't know who they are. like But everybody else, you probably don't know them in this movie. But yeah I'll tell you, the caliber of acting from all of them is such that maybe we should.
Speaker: Because all of these people, I thought they were fucking fantastic. Like, this is a weird movie. And like like a lot of weird movies, if you don't really give your all to it, you don't really give in, no one's going to believe this shit at all.
Speaker: They do. They do. And I think it works so well. Yeah, no, I totally agree with you. it's um it's It's such like a little bright spot in like this weird um chasm of Shudder movies, of like these movies that just come and go or like whatever. And like every once in a while you get a spiral or you get a dark harvest. sure And you're like, wow, that was actually trying to say something.
Speaker: And I think that like this is one of those movies that I was just like, huh, I'm not going to forget this one. Like, like, listen, there are so many of these either to be or all these different streaming platforms that I will watch and I will literally forget tomorrow.
Speaker: Yeah. And this is just one of those ones that like stuck with me. And so when we thought about this episode and thought about cornfields, I was like, oh, dark harvest. I, we, we should do that. Like that needs a little bit more attention. And I'm so glad that we did. And I'm so glad you liked it Yeah, um I'll tell you what, me too. And like, you know, because a lot of those streaming platforms that are free, right, we don't get over here. So like, you know, we things have started to change here such that like, okay, we do have Paramount Plus here now. We do have HBO. We do have, ah you know, Disney and whatever. But like we don't have to be, we don't have philo or philo, however you say it. when And like yeah ah some of the other ones too, that that you would know, they just don't work here. So like when I have to go rent a movie because of that, I'm like, Oh God damn it. Here we go. It better be good. And so this one I was like, Oh shit, that is good.
Speaker: And ah you know, there's there's very few where I'm like, now i got to go buy it. Guess what? I'm going to fucking buy it. Like I can't wait to watch it again almost. And I did appreciate that. Like,
Speaker: The way that they let this story play out is like, it's not like, it's not that Bastion is a fantasy land. It is just kind of a run of the mill Midwestern town. Small town America.
Speaker: Yeah. And I appreciate that like, even the fact that his brother won the contest or whatever, and they're now given the Brady Bunch home and they're given the car and like all this stuff is like, they still...
Speaker: ah depict this family as deeply, deeply troubled. Like, yes and, and, and I couldn't tell, and I i wanted to get your opinion on this. Does the dad know or does he not?
Speaker: The dad knows. You think that he knew that like, if his son wins, that he will become the new sawtooth Jack? Yes. I, I, I think that, I think that they, I think that all the adults know, if I'm being honest, that, And I think, I mean, you you see it in um in in the moment where ah the one kid tries to get back into his house, right? And this is this is this is right before we see the kids that you were talking about earlier who go in like the bomb shelter thing. Yeah, it's the it's the kid of Hispanic descent who they disparage in the 1960s way that they disparage. Right, right. So the kid knows what's going on too. like i mean, he doesn't know what happens, but like he knows that he just saw Sawtooth Jack kill like three of his friends. And so he's terrified. And truly, most of the kids out there are terrified. They're trying to hide in one way or another. And so he tries to get back into his house. and The mom won't let him back in.
Speaker: Yeah, she turns them away. Yeah, the dad the dad is like, go out there and be a man. and And, you know, they know full well what their kids are up against and how could they not because every year this happens. So there's always going to be a smattering of kids that are dispatched by Sawtooth Jack. Well, they even say in like when there's like the, um the what do you call that? The the meeting at the beginning, like the, what do you call those things at school? The ah the convocation?
Speaker: No, like we like an assembly and during the assembly. Yeah, yeah. Sure, sure. Where the principal says, you are going to lose friends during this. you are going to Some of you are not going to make it through this. That's just it.
Speaker: and And I don't know. It was something very chilling about that. And like the fact that well and and how some of the parents try to drug their children so that they're not awake for it. Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah. Including our main character. so i mean, it's, it's a, it's a lot, it's a lot darker than it seems. And like, you know, how far are we willing? i think there's, there's some good modern parables in here. How far are we willing to sacrifice our children for the things that we think will keep tradition alive?
Speaker: You know, how far will how far will we go for those things? How far will we go to have guns in America? Right. Well, kids keep getting killed by guns in school. Right. yep And so it's it's almost like the the idea of the run going after Sawtooth Jack. That's almost like sending your kids to school in modern day America now. You know what i mean? like yeah you you You don't know who's going to get their heads you know chopped off or who's going to have you know a bullet put into them.
Speaker: um so there's i think there's a lot to take away from this and ah you know and i think you know at at the very end of it well near the very end of it anyway um you know when he has to make the decision about killing you know sawtooth jack who he knows is his brother now he knows yeah and has put the the gun to his head and pull the trigger that was that was pretty harrowing to watch you know yeah pretty damn sad really well Well, I think the um the only reason he does is because his brother basically says like, do it, do it. I don't want to be like, he he's already set fire to his childhood home. He's already like raised hell and he's like, just get it over with essentially. Yeah. Right.
Speaker: um I had one, I had one thing in my notes that I wanted to get your opinion on because there's, there's a moment early in the film and I'm talking before even the run starts.
Speaker: Where the two boys, Richie and his friend, who's like part of like the skull gang of like the four kids who initially like go out on the truck. There's a moment where I thought maybe this was going to be a little gay. i don't know if you had that feeling. Where they're hanging out together towards the beginning I mean, maybe that does pass by me, but I'll go back and look at that. That that wouldn't surprise me at all.
Speaker: I mean, ultimately, this is a story about him falling in love with like an interracial relationship and yeah the disparity between that. Like, it's not the main focus of the movie, but like, I don't know. There's something about that little boyhood thing that I was like, oh, are they about to get a little kiss? but know i don't they don' I think that that exists for so many boys and they just, you know, we just never talk about it. Well, and it's and it's ultimately super tragic because the first person who is dispatched essentially is that kid who's like his best friend. And he, what is it his last words? His last words are Richie and he dies. It's so sad.
Speaker: It really is. It's so sad. I don't know. This one ah this one is a this one's a little bit special to me. It sticks with you. And some things I had in my notes, I thought it was funny. like some of the co like So they're kind of dressed up like Halloween and in some of it. like They each have like their own little like gang or like whatever. yeah And did you happen to notice that one of them was dressed up like Fidel Castro? Yeah. I did notice that, and I thought it was hilarious.
Speaker: just like Just like given the time, I was like, that's actually pretty fucking funny. Yeah. um I don't know there's ah you know. We haven't really talked about the... ah the the ah the officer in this movie, kind of the the keeper of the tradition, yeah if you will. i I will say that was the one part of the movie that maybe they dropped the ball a little bit because I wanted to know why.
Speaker: Because like even written in his childhood home, um the the kid who won the first run, it says, like fuck Officer Riggs or like whatever. like yeah It never really like goes into like what his role is or why he's like the enforcer of this tradition who's who's who who's who and why and then and then and then we kind of get like that um stinger at the end where it's actually the farmer who kills richie and buries him to become sawtooth jack so i but listen but they're but they're all they're all so closely connected it's like the they're they're they are a part of the guild and the guild is the guild is what rules
Speaker: I think that like, if this was like a six episode series, I would be totally interested in finding out more about like officer Ricks and the farmer and like, what I agree that all means to like this, yeah you know, it's, it's, it's definitely a given a take. It's like,
Speaker: we we could have We could have a series, and and I think that the series would largely work, but the series might also be too long. There might be too much to it, you know, to have like 45 minute or hour long episodes. But then over here, you know, with 96 minutes, they do pretty economical job of being efficient. And telling a story, it's almost like, well, if we go too deep, you know, this thing easily could have been another half hour long, you know? Yeah. And then would that have been too long? Like at some point in that extra half hour, would it have maybe started to become too corny or something? Yeah, I think that I was so enraptured by the environment and the lore. and my stupid brain wants... You fall into it.
Speaker: Yeah, you want more, but maybe we don't need it. You know what i mean? like yeah I think it's one where if you just if you allow yourself to just fall into the, you know the as you said there, like like the total environment of the film,
Speaker: you can just sort of live in it for a little while. And it's almost like when we when we live in it, we don't need to know everything. We just know that it works. Maybe I'll read the novel. I was thinking the same thing. I kind of forgot that it that it was a book. um And maybe more of that is explained in there. But, you know, it's it's interesting. Like, a lot of the people on Letterboxd who didn't like it, who, like, give it, you know, one and a half or one stars or whatever, they're like, they don't... Seriously? they It didn't make any sense. And I'm like...
Speaker: what didn't make sense about this? Like it's yeah what literally, you watching it's literally all explained to you in the movie. Maybe you just weren't, if you weren't paying attention, I suppose that's, that's your fault. Um, but yeah, just look, I, we could talk for another 20 minutes about how good we think it is. It's, it is truly, I think a great little film really enjoyed it.
Speaker: All right. Well, I don't think we explained it before, but we grade here on a seven stripe scale of the seven stripes of the Gale Rainbow. Maddie, what do you give Dark Harvest? I gave it a six. And I said, I love this film. It's bold. It's original. It's oddly touching. Well acted by everyone involved. And it's a great flick to welcome us to the Halloween season.
Speaker: Yeah, perfect timing for a movie like this. I gave it a five and a half. I said, what a fun little treat. I said, great for the fall season with some important messages around conformity and trust.
Speaker: And that's sexs Dark Harvest. um Dark Harvest, folks. Get Harvest in, you know? Yeah. Well, we'll take our final break. We'll be right back to close out the show and a game that I have tailored specifically to a Maddie's Heritage audience.
Speaker: Oh, boy. A sticky situation at an airport in Tennessee after baggage was sprayed with raw sewage. Sprayed? I know. Soil is one of those words. There's no way to say it. It's just sound. It's like a yeah chunky moisture. Oh. It's just into the two words you hate. Yeah. Corn? How'd that get on my bag? Okay, too far.
Speaker: Oh, my gosh.
Speaker: All right, folks, that was episode 169 of Frygay the 13th Horror Podcast. But before we go, as always, we have a game ready for you. i should Or I should say, Andrew has created a game for us.
Speaker: And this one should be exciting. um Andrew created a game called Corn or Porn. So Andrew, this is great. say It's like trick or treat kind of. So tell us about how Corn or Porn works.
Speaker: All right, I'm going to read you some titles of a either harvesty, corny horror movie, or is it a gay porn film? Perfect. I should i should excel at this. We'll see.
Speaker: i think you're going to do well, but let's let's get into it. So your first one is simply named Husk. That is going to be a porn movie.
Speaker: That is actually a horror movie. Oh, God damn. 2011 horror movie about a group of friends stranded near a cornfield where they discovered that the scarecrows aren't exactly decorative.
Speaker: But shouldn't that be a gay porn about husky guys? Yeah, I don't know. and well Don't remind me about the husky section in JCPenney because can't. yeah Exactly. just saying.
Speaker: All right. Your next one is Down on the Farm. Okay, this has got to be porn. Yes, Down on the town on the Farm is a gay porn movie. Was that Corbin Fisher?
Speaker: It is. didn't know I was going say that. Yep. You know, look, I'm to be honest. I remember that one pretty well. I'm not going to. It's so funny. couldn't even get it out of my mouth before I even said it. All right. Your next one is just simply called Scarecrows.
Speaker: That's got to be a horror film. Yes, it is a 1988 horror movie about criminals who end up at a isolated farmhouse surrounded by some extremely homicidal scarecrows. Wow, Jesus.
Speaker: All right. In the in the grand theme of he who walks behind the rose, this movie is entitled The Back Row. This is going to be a porn movie. Yes, this is a 1973 gay adult film starring Casey Donovan, who plays a cowboy arriving in New York City. That that sounds like one that you would go to the old Bijou Theater in Chicago. you ever Did you ever see that? I never went inside it, but did you ever see that in Chicago? You remember that? Yeah, I've seen it, but I've never been there. The porent the the porn theater? such a yeah I can't believe it exists still. It's absolutely crazy. All right, your next one is simply entitled The Fields.
Speaker: I want that to be a horror film. You are correct. This is a 2011 horror thriller set around an isolated Pennsylvania tall town starring Cloris Leachman and Tara Reid. I'll tell you what, it's a great name, The Fields. I like that.
Speaker: right, your next one, and there's there's two more. Your next one is Saddle Up. That is a porn movie. Come on. Yes, it is a ah real gay adult film from Hot House Entertainment. Hot House, okay. With a ranch and a cowboy theme.
Speaker: And your final one is Stud Farm. ah So this is going to be a trick one, isn't it? um Boy, I wonder if it's both.
Speaker: Is it both? It is a straight up gay porn. okay. you you tricked your You tricked your own brain into not trusting itself. Who who made that one? I don't know. It doesn't list it. so Well, Andrew, that was a good game. That was that was very very much right at my alley. Tailored directly to you, my friend. I've seen a lot of pornography in my life. What can I say? Listen, folks, I hope you enjoyed episode 169 of Frege the 13th Horror Podcast. Before we go, as always, some housekeeping. Look, if you want to support our little show that could, it's been going on for almost nine years at this point, um we'd love your support. And here's the easy way that you can do it. One of two ways. You can leave a review for us.
Speaker: There you go. That's easy to do, right? Maybe you've done that before. Or you can become a patron. of us. And you can do that by going to www.frygay13.com slash support. Link right there to our Patreon. And my friend, you can join at the very low level of just $1 a month. That's it. For $1 a month, you support an independent podcast and you make sure that we break even throughout the year with all the And you make sure that don't have to run ads.
Speaker: Exactly. Right. So like, once again, did you hear one ad during this episode? You did not. So, um, if you appreciate that $1 a month, ain't too much to ask. And thank you so much to our newest patron, Lee versus film. Awesome. Thank Lee. He's our newest patron.
Speaker: And I know that he's from Europe because it came through as Euros. So awesome. Listen, Lee, thank you very much, my European friend. I'll be joining your ranks soon. um I love that. Thank you for being a patron with us. We really appreciate it.
Speaker: And a fun little story before we before we end the show. Oh, yeah, please. is ah we were recognized in the wild, Matty. What happened? Tell me. I was up in our little Barnes and Noble up Skokie, Illinois, getting ready to go see Practical Magic 2. And I was buying some gay little horror books and the ah the the man behind the counter.
Speaker: i was just commenting on my books. and he was like, oh, I really liked this one. dot that thatra And Michael was with me. And he goes, oh, dude you know do you like podcasts? And he was like, oh, yeah, I listen to a bunch of podcasts. And he was like, oh, check out Freigay the 13th. And he was like, oh, yeah, I love that one. I listen to it all the time. no way. And then Michael was like, well, this is Andrew. And the way that his mouth, the way that his jaw just dropped in a way that like I've never seen before in a while, I was like, oh, my God, somebody knows us. That is so crazy. That's really cool. I love it. So shout out, shout out to the cashier at Barnes and Noble in Skokie, Illinois.
Speaker: That's wonderful. Wonderful news. um Look, also, you know, this is the first episode that you guys are going to hear in October from us. Happy fall, everybody. Happy fall. Happy spooky season. Happy getting ready for Halloween.
Speaker: um What a great time in the year. you know it's ah it's our it's our It's our time, Andrew. It's our time to shine. It's our time to be alive. Exactly. But also, Andrew, do you know what else it's time for? It's time for every single person who listens to this show to go out there this spooky season and to get slayed.
