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(UNLOCKED) Episode 13 - Timbits are kind of screwed up when you think about it
26 Plays1 hour ago
(Originally released on October 16, 2024)
Tim Hortons! The Canadian cultural icon that has managed to spread its tentacles worldwide has an origin in scams and treachery from a man who wasn't even named Tim at all in his life. Here we will complain about a lack of menued vegetarian food options, the discontinuation of bread bowls, and a theatre play with an awful story.
You can follow along with the video at the start using this URL:
https://youtu.be/pGMWnmFtbqI
Recommended
Transcript
Show Format Revamp and Bonus Content
00:00:02
Speaker
Hello! You may have noticed that we've been absent for the past few months. We've been busy with our personal lives and needed to take a break. We've been working on what to do with the show and have decided to rework it slight bit just to make something that we think that you'll find a bit better and works better for the both of us.
00:00:19
Speaker
In the meantime, please enjoy some of our bonus content we're making available for free and we will see you soon.
Leila Yang's Online Presence
00:00:27
Speaker
Alright, well I have something to show you. Show me! So i was walking down Burrard Street again and I saw this look in the thread. Oh yeah.
00:00:39
Speaker
Yep. Don't you love Leila Yang? No, like seriously, every other... yeah You fuck up and don't watch something on your YouTube burner account once.
00:00:51
Speaker
And it's Layla Yang every other video. The reason why this I took a photo of this is for two reasons. Number one, and she still calls Twitter as Twitter.
00:01:02
Speaker
Based, as do we. And secondly, she's removed any mention of ted or TEDx Shaughnessy, rather. What?
00:01:12
Speaker
Yeah, don't know. i don't know what the story is. Well, now, let's have a look. Is she still in the speakers? Yeah, she's still listening to the speaker. Yeah, maybe she just said, well, that's stale because it was from 2022. Like, I don't know what the story is, really.
00:01:28
Speaker
That is true. That is true. Yeah, I don't know. I feel like she's going to haunt me for as long as I live in this city. You're not the one who has Leila Yang fucking ads constantly.
00:01:42
Speaker
and like, you know how YouTube works. Like when this hits YouTube, like there's just going to be end to end like Leila Yang ads. on our YouTube video. I think we've done more for Layla Yang than she has done for us. I feel like she should be paying us for all the free advertising we've been giving her, because surely our base audience is able to afford most of the homes she sells.
00:02:04
Speaker
Based upon the show that she tried to launch, I would characterize her as firmly in the camp of any publicity as good publicity. Potentially. Well, do you want to start? ah Yeah, sure.
Pronoun Legitimacy and Personal Significance
00:02:21
Speaker
oh ah it's good to be back hello everybody it's the way to get moments it's tamarack and heather i'm heather i'm tamarack most of the time my pronouns are they them or it it's Everybody knows our pronouns if they're listening to the bonus episode.
00:02:45
Speaker
Yeah, but I get the impression that much like in my personal life, people are somewhat thinking that it, it's is a bit. It is not. No, it's legit pronoun that people use.
00:02:55
Speaker
ah More importantly, it's a legit pronoun I use. So like, God, people. Anyway. Well, I bet dollars to donuts that ah people would love to hear about my trip to London.
00:03:08
Speaker
Tamarack, I shared a video with you. I think we should watch and commentate it together. Hey, it's Heather in post-production. um There's a video that's in the show notes that you should be following along if you are listening to the audio-only version of this.
00:03:23
Speaker
Just as soon as I say play, you can just go ahead and play it, and you'll be able to see what I'm seeing as well as Tamarack is seeing.
London Trip Highlights and Tim Hortons Comparison
00:03:32
Speaker
So, three, two, one, play.
00:03:36
Speaker
So, yeah, I just took a vacation to London, you know, went to the Fringe when I was in Edinburgh, came back to London for a few days, and then went to Dublin to see family for about a week, I guess.
00:03:51
Speaker
And I decided would just take some B-roll shots of the London Underground. I see there were a lot of delays, but yeah I don't know what they were doing.
00:04:03
Speaker
oh hey. That's a deep level train. Yeah, they're cute. It's also like not air conditioned. So went to Park Royal.
00:04:15
Speaker
What were you doing in Park Royal, Heather?
00:04:19
Speaker
went to a leisure park, the Royal Leisure Park. To get coffee. I was right. i was right. This place does look exactly like anywhere in the middle of like the interior BC.
00:04:34
Speaker
Actually, it's more like No, no, no. It looks like somewhere in the fucking suburbs of Vancouver in some way. Yeah, okay. Fair, fair, fair. Fair, fair, fair. It has towers. Like you saw the giant condo out there.
00:04:44
Speaker
But look at the menu.
00:04:48
Speaker
Vegetarian and vegan. Yeah, like, this is embarrassing that, like, UK Tim Hortons is better at being a shitty coffee shop than Canadian Tim Hortons. It better than Canadian Tim Hortons.
00:05:06
Speaker
The food is better. The coffee is better somehow. I don't know what the deal is. And I had a Honeycrawler, which I really like, and it tasted better than the Honeycrawler I can get at home.
00:05:19
Speaker
Well, they're probably not shipping just the the frozen pucks. Yeah, don't know what this the situation is there, but they very much lean into the Canadianisms, as you see here is Tim Horton.
00:05:30
Speaker
Yep. Who put a curse on the Leafs. Yeah. And I got myself a meal and you can see it's la labeled as vegetarian or might be. No, this one's vegetarian because I got actual cheese.
00:05:43
Speaker
And then I came just in time for them to switch over from the breakfast menu to the lunch and dinner menu, and they have burgers. I thought it was going to be the traditional, ah the menu one of the menu panels is broken.
00:05:55
Speaker
na That's what made... A fucking drive-thru! Yeah, it's empty. mean Nobody used it. Good grief.
00:06:10
Speaker
So yeah, you know, a friend of mine from Portugal joined me for for this trip, so she and I had a meal together. And we walked back and took the London Underground back.
00:06:21
Speaker
God, that road looks miserable. Oh, it was it was not a pleasant road to walk along. has a bike path, though. Yeah, and it also has, you know, public transportation options nearby, at least.
00:06:36
Speaker
Yeah, that's that's really what makes it more like suburbs of Vancouver. You could maybe find decent transit around. Yeah, well, and it took me about 50 minutes to get out this way.
00:06:48
Speaker
um like There's no there'ss about 60 Tim Hortons locations in the UK now. and But the funny thing is, it's not my first time of going to a Tim Hortons in Europe.
00:07:01
Speaker
I do go on. Well, they used to be in spa convenience stores in Dublin, or rather in Ireland as a whole.
00:07:12
Speaker
So when I was in Ireland, oh, 10 years ago, I think they had them then. And they're not they're not there anymore. like when I was back in Dublin, um I made a note to go check out a spa and like, no, they didn't have anything like that.
00:07:27
Speaker
But yeah, Tim Hortons is now an international brand. And I guess it's always been an and international brand because they're in the States, but the grand scheme of things are not that much different from the Canadian ones.
00:07:39
Speaker
I would say that the food is kind of shittier in some ways, but I don't know. i have I don't have a lot of but high expectations for Tim Hortons in general.
00:07:50
Speaker
But but's let's introduce Tim Hortons a little bit more formally rather than talking about my... Vacation I took just a few months ago.
Tim Hortons' Canadian Cultural Influence
00:07:58
Speaker
Tim Hortons, officially Tim Hortons Incorporated, and notably Hortons is plural, is a Canadian coffee shop and quick service restaurant chain headquartered in Toronto with over 5,700 locations across 13 countries.
00:08:13
Speaker
Originally founded in 1964 in Hamilton, Ontario by NHL player Tim Hortons, lack the note of an S, as Tim Hortons Donuts on the corner of...
00:08:24
Speaker
I had to say that. There's no apostrophe in the name Tim Hortons, and I'll explain why. on the corner of Ottawa Street North and Dunsmuir Road, it remained in his hands until his death in 1974.
00:08:38
Speaker
Today, it's part of Restaurant Brands International, or RBI, as I will refer to it as, which also includes Burger King, Popeyes, and Firehouse Subs. However, very annoyingly for how you can say its acronym, not Arby's.
00:08:56
Speaker
Shut up. However, let's talk about Tim Horton and his hockey career and him opting to open a donut store on the side and what led to his death.
00:09:08
Speaker
Spoilers, his death was not donut related.
00:09:25
Speaker
So in band class, um one of the songs that we played for, I think, the ninth grade year was the Hockey Night in Canada theme. i was trying to figure out drops for things like this. And what I realized is we've never talked about a hockey player in the dozen or so episodes preceding this.
00:09:45
Speaker
It's true. I've mentioned the Canucks several times, but you cannot call what they what they're doing playing hockey. No, they're not. they they play called They play a game called making Heather depressed and stop watching the game in 2011 for some reason.
00:10:01
Speaker
And ruining your fantasy league team. Yep. ah For some people, yeah. So Miles Gilbert Tim Horton, Tim is his nickname somehow, was born on January 12, 1930 in Cochrane, Ontario, basically the middle of nowhere by Ontario standards, to parents Ethel May and Aaron Oakley Horton.
00:10:23
Speaker
He had one brother, Jerry, and his father was a mechanic for Canadian National Railway. In 1935, his parents moved to Du Parquet, Quebec, just as much the middle of nowhere in Quebec near the Ontario border,
00:10:36
Speaker
back to Cochrane in 1938, and then his family moved to Sudbury in 1945, the latter being the basis for the fictional town of Letterkenny of Kraytv fame. And I think it's on Hulu in the States or something.
00:10:49
Speaker
During this time, Tim developed I believe you mean the documentary Letterkenny. Yeah. You know, that show kind of got lousy after season seven, I'll have to admit. sort this guy i didn't i didn't I didn't watch it after i lost ability to view Crave things.
00:11:08
Speaker
yeah that's fair. During this time, Tim developed his hockey skills and eventually found himself back playing hockey in Cochran. However, by 1948, he was playing for the Copper Cliff Junior Redmond in a Northern Ontario Hockey Association.
00:11:22
Speaker
A scout for the Maple Leafs found him, being the Toronto Maple Leafs, I should say, And he was assigned to play for the junior hockey feeder team, the St. Michael's Majors, which was the team for the school he was attending, St. Michael's College, located in Toronto. It's like Bathurst and St. Clair, not far from Casa Loma.
00:11:40
Speaker
This school has been rather successful in churning out not only hockey players, but also CFL and NFL football players. To this day, the school has an intensive athletics program and has its own goddamn ice arena. It's a fucking high school.
00:11:54
Speaker
Yeah, these still like these
Canadian vs. French Pastries at Tim Hortons
00:11:57
Speaker
exist. I think there's a lot of like juicing high schools in in in the States for football in particular. But yeah, we got him we got them too.
00:12:06
Speaker
We also have a toxic relationship with our sports. Yeah, it's great up here. um Some of the players that have come out of the school, including Tim Horton, include Bobby Bauer, three-time Lady Bang trophy winner and two-time Stanley Cup winner, also World War II veteran.
00:12:21
Speaker
Murray Costello, former NHL player and former president of Hockey Canada. Ted Lindsey, formerly a player of the Chicago Blackhawks and Detroit Red Wings, four-time Stanley Cup winner and founder of the first attempt at a predecessor to the now National Hockey League Players Association, which is featured in the 1995 movie Net Worth.
00:12:41
Speaker
It's actually a movie seen and then it's all right. Overall, 13 Hockey Hall of Fame players, including Horton, have come out of the school since the hockey program began in 1907. It's also had the likes of Robert DeLuce, Porter Airlines founder, Sergio Marchione, former CEO of Fiat Chrysler and Ferrari, Frank Buckley, president of Buckley's Cough Syrup, Anthony DiOrio, co-founder of Crypto Bullshit Ethereum, and former PMO director of media relations, Stephen Leachie,
00:13:14
Speaker
who served as Prime Minister Stephen Harper's chief of staff, and then later was MPP of Ontario, who introduced legislation which abused the Notwithstanding Clause to force teachers back to work.
00:13:26
Speaker
ah yeah Tim Horton Donuts has French pastry chefs worried. These Tim Horton croissants are not French. La Monde, butter, chocolate. Delicious, yeah but not French. Mmm. Tim Hortons croissants may not be French, but they're always fresh.
00:13:44
Speaker
Why? devil Because you keep eating them. In 1940. No, you keep helping yourself. Perhaps we could steal the recipe, no?
00:13:58
Speaker
Almost enough of a cell phone that he kind of gets a pass. I mean, it's such a cell phone that I think he died from shame. Anyway, 1949, Horton made his first NHL debut for one single game as a reserve player. No goals or assists, but ended up playing the rest of the 49-50 season in the American Hockey League, which is the minor league, and the 50-51 season for the Pittsburgh Hornets, amassing five and eight goals and eight and 26 assists in each respective season.
00:14:31
Speaker
He'd be called up for four more games for Toronto in the 51-52 season, no goals or no assists, but finally would be made a permanent player in 1952 for the Maple Leafs as a defenseman. During his time as a Leaf, he'd appear in seven All-Star games and would win four Stanley Cup championships, including the final year that Toronto would win said championship as of 2024,
00:14:52
Speaker
And the final one at the original six NHL teams, so being it that it was when any the NHL was the original six, and that would be Boston, Chicago, Toronto, Montreal, New York, and Detroit.
00:15:05
Speaker
That's right. The Stanley Cup drought that Toronto's had since the late 60s, it's Tim Hortons' fault. ah Yeah, that he's something of a phylactery for Toronto, for the Maple Leafs Stanley c Cup and ambitions, and he unfortunately it broke.
00:15:21
Speaker
Yeah, a name that has not come up as of yet is a man named Ronald Von Joyce. He moved from Tadamagoosh, Nova Scotia to Hamilton in 1946, quitting school in the process. And after having worked a few odd industrial jobs, working briefly in the Royal Canadian Navy until 1956, he would eventually become a police officer for the Hamilton Police Service until 1965.
00:15:46
Speaker
Finding that his police salary did not pay him enough. In 1963, Joyce purchased a Dairy Queen franchise in Hamilton. This was hugely successful for him. He made triple his police salary, so he decided to open another, but it was turned down by the city.
00:16:02
Speaker
Classic cop move. Sure, I'm being paid a bunch, but I could get more money. That breeds capitalism, doesn't it? By this time, it was 1964, and things were about to change. He met Mr. Horton.
00:16:15
Speaker
They decided to team up, and Ron quit his job from the police service. A second location was open, and it began as a franchise. One of Ron's first experiences of baker's training for Tim Horton was learning that his trainer didn't have a manual but relied on a fucking Ouija board to figure out how many they need for the day.
00:16:37
Speaker
ah See, I approve of this method. ah Let the spirits guide you. By 1967, two more stores were open, bringing the total to four, and Joyce then became full business partners with him.
00:16:51
Speaker
By this time, it was a multi-million dollar franchise system. So before I start to talk about the death of Tim Horton, little bit of content warning. We're going to talk about some subjects that are ah sensitive to a lot of folks. um You know, we're going to be talking about drug abuse and alcohol abuse.
00:17:10
Speaker
I'm not sure how long this section is. If you're sensitive to this, I understand. Just giving you a heads up. So we will never know exactly what um Tim Horton was exactly ailed with, but it wouldn't shock me if he was a sufferer of, I cannot say this to save my life, chronic traumatic encephalopathy, or CTE. I'm just going to call it CTE because it's much easier.
00:17:34
Speaker
The thing is about hockey players during this time is like if you suffered a h head injury, and this goes for any sport really, you'd be told to sleep it off, right? And you probably would go play the next game. This is an era where like PTSD, for example, was referred to as shell shock and you were a pussy if you didn't suck it up or take it like a man.
00:17:54
Speaker
so like yeah Yeah, this is an era where like shit like this wasn't taken seriously. Yeah, like like veterans were veterans from the First and Second World War were being made fun of for having traumatic episodes and were ashamed for it and were also offered no care whatsoever.
00:18:14
Speaker
this This also wouldn't surprise me. And honestly, this is still kind of a problem today. It gets a lot more press because of how prevalent the issue is like in American football or hand egg, as I keep calling it.
00:18:28
Speaker
But like in in hockey, it's saying it's just as big of a problem. Like these athletes are getting ah horrifically injured and mostly they just retire before they have the effects of the injuries that they're that they're sustaining.
00:18:45
Speaker
Yeah, one of the things, and at some point we'll do a bonus episode on on this man, but like Don Cherry really liked seeing all these hits that, you know, especially from enforcers or goons. Yeah.
00:18:57
Speaker
And so, yeah, like he, he, he lavished in like the bruiser type of player, like Todd Bertuzzi of the Canucks, I think comes up, comes to mind or like the, the big hip check. Terry hated Bertuzzi if I remember correctly, but yeah, that's, that's, that's,
00:19:15
Speaker
pertuzzi is an example of a hockey player that would be there to kind of fuck everybody else up yes and like to a lesser extent like one of the goals of of defensemen is ah hip checks and stuff like that and that shit can fuck somebody up because they're they're they're moving a lot faster than it seems Yeah, well, and one thing I'll say about hockey is hockey injuries are pretty bad. I actually tore ligaments in my shoulder from playing hockey.
00:19:44
Speaker
So like, I'm lucky I didn't get a concussion from that. I got a concussion from a car accident, however. But the ice will fuck you up if you aren't prepared or aren't playing properly. It is a miracle that CTE, as an example, like I i don't, I should make it clear.
CTE's Impact on Hockey
00:19:59
Speaker
I'm not saying Tim Horne has CTE, but like some of the things we're going to talk about might make you think that it is the case.
00:20:05
Speaker
But CTE is treated a lot more seriously today. And I'm surprised it's not often just called, you know, being woke and soy or whatever. But dickhead coaches are everywhere. And they're just probably going to say, oh, you're a pussy if you take a break because you got a little bit of a noggin whack, right?
00:20:23
Speaker
Yeah, it's like it's a forward's job to get. It's a like it's a it's a defenseman's job to hit the forward. So obviously the forwards are going to get going to get hit. If you don't like it, don't be a forward.
00:20:35
Speaker
So to continue here, um business kept expanding. But in 1970, he was traded from the Leafs to the New York Rangers. In 71, he was traded to the Pittsburgh Penguins, who were a new expansion team.
00:20:46
Speaker
And finally, in 1972, he was traded to the Buffalo Sabres, putting him a mere 100 kilometers from his first restaurant in Hamilton. And this is important to bring up for what I'm about to talk about here.
00:20:57
Speaker
tim had to be effectively bribed to play the 1973-74 sabre season he was in his early 40s and was no longer the spring chicken he was prior plus he was raking in millions in his restaurant chain yeah he didn't need this shit yeah exactly he didn't have to do this sabre's general manager punch imlatch enticed him to stay by giving him a tommaso pantera
00:21:24
Speaker
Oh, wow. I scrolled down to the third photo. Yeah, or don't look at that just yet. But yeah, this is this is the car in question. And it's that's it's a it's a gorgeous car.
00:21:37
Speaker
it's It is probably the hottest high-velocity coffin you will ever set foot in. yeah you're Yeah, you're getting a little ahead of me there. Yeah. Oh, no, that, like, the car just looks, I'll put this up on the YouTubes, but the car just looks like trouble.
00:21:52
Speaker
In the same way that, like, 80s Ferraris just, like, looked like i Traumatic vehicular ah ah homicide.
00:22:05
Speaker
So this this was a mid-engine sports car with a five-speed manual transmission, had rear-wheel drive, 4.9-liter Ford v eight at sorry, horsepower, 100 kilometers. Wow.
00:22:18
Speaker
had a top speed of two hundred and fifty six kilometre per hour and had a glorious highway fuel economy of sixteen point one liters for every hundred kilometers Okay, but this is a 70s sports car, ah particularly with an American engine.
00:22:35
Speaker
This is actually pretty normal. but Yeah. This is actually, like, not... it it looks It looks a lot faster than I think that i think it is. Yeah, you know, it's definitely the sort of car that existed before the oil crisis.
00:22:49
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. This is the sort of car that the American auto industry just could not make after oil crisis and then CAFE standards. So they made they made ah increasingly mutatingly large trucks instead.
00:23:06
Speaker
On February 20th, 1974, I'm giving you a date so we can know where this is going. The Buffalo Sabres had faced Horton's previous team, the Toronto Maple Leafs. The Sabres lost to the Leafs 4-2.
00:23:18
Speaker
One of the events that occurred before this game was where Horton had taken a puck to the face. An x-ray appointment was scheduled for the next day back in Buffalo, but he opted to play the game with what was suspected to be a cracked jaw.
00:23:31
Speaker
He was in immense pain, but painkillers helped him cope through. After the game, instead of taking the team bus like everyone else, Imletch had given Horn permission to take as Pantera to return to Buffalo, as they were playing the Atlanta Flames the next evening, a game they'd subsequently tie 4-4, will add now.
00:23:48
Speaker
His reason for having the car for travels instead of going by bus was so he could leave earlier in the day prior to the game to see his mother. So basically he left Buffalo before everybody else so he can go see his mom.
00:24:00
Speaker
Mm-hmm. Cute. Before leaving Maple Leaf Gardens, his daughter Kelly ran over to him and gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek, telling him that she loved him. This decision by her would haunt her forever because it was atypical of her and was also the last time she would ever see her father alive.
00:24:17
Speaker
she was supposed this was like ah This is a thing that actually happens a lot. Most of it is confirmation bias because you remember doing these things because of the traumatic incident. Like, yeah, it's it's strange how often shit like this comes up.
00:24:33
Speaker
Well, an example would be is when my grandfather passed away. It was the night before his 50th wedding anniversary.
Tim Horton's Personal Struggles and Legacy
00:24:40
Speaker
And his um sister was visiting from Toronto like this. My grandfather lived in Vancouver prior to his death.
00:24:46
Speaker
And um he said to my mom that he wanted his sister to stay close that night. And that was the night he passed away on the couch. Yeah. Spooky shit. Yeah, she was supposed to. And that's why that's why the baker with the Ouija board had the right fucking idea.
00:25:02
Speaker
and Probably. She was supposed to join him for dinner that evening. But due to some circumstances, this did not happen. And thus her last memory of him was seeing his Pantera drive off from a spaghetti restaurant.
00:25:14
Speaker
There was some sort of conflict. Look, if i'm good if the last time I see you is like you peacing out from the old spaghetti factory, I'm going to lie. Yeah.
00:25:29
Speaker
Well, it was like some sort of circumstance where um Horton was supposed to meet somebody for dinner there and then his family was going to join them. But then like some sort of miscommunication or conflict came up and he had to leave, right?
00:25:42
Speaker
So on his way back, he'd stop at his office in Oakville, Ontario, about 50 kilometers from Maple Leaf Gardens, where he had lost that evening. There he'd meet with Ron Joyce and also his brother, Jerry, who had noticed that Tim was drunk.
00:25:55
Speaker
During his time in Buffalo, his drinking went from a mere nuisance to full-blown problem. Although really for much of his NHL playing career, this was a problem where he'd bounce in and out of sobriety.
00:26:06
Speaker
This wasn't too uncommon for a lot of hockey players during this time, especially enforcers, especially, you know, anyone who suffered a lot of injuries, such as Horton had. Also, like, brain injuries further reduce your inhibition, so it's easier to get addicted on to substances.
00:26:25
Speaker
Mm-hmm. It's a it's an awful death spiral. Also, i just want to point out that Buddy drove 50k mostly on the highway, a lot of it on the 401, like while being drunk out of his gourd.
00:26:37
Speaker
And it's only going to get worse. Actually, I think the 401 doesn't go to Oakville. It's the 403 or the 407. Oh, right, right, right. Sorry. oh right right right sorry Yeah. 401. I'm reading too much of the news. Yeah. It goes to like ah Milton, the which is like West of Oakville. I had to like double check that because like I've driven to both Oakville and Milton.
00:26:59
Speaker
Despite Jerry and Ron's assistance, Tim assured them that he was fine and capable of driving, and so he left the Oakville office at 3.30 a.m. m heading towards the American border.
00:27:10
Speaker
At around 4 a.m., a woman called into the Ontario Provincial Police, that being the OPP, reporting that a car was speeding along the Queen Elizabeth Way, the QEW, in Burlington at high speed.
00:27:21
Speaker
Not too long after, an OPP officer, Mike Gula, patrolling in Vineland, just outside of St. Catharines, and 50 kilometers away from Burlington, saw Horton's car and began pursuit, but due to the high rate of speed, could not keep up.
00:27:35
Speaker
And that's why they needed to get those, like, police chaser pursuit sports cars. They used to have a Volvo... I think like one of the station wagons, and they actually loaded it up with nitrous.
00:27:49
Speaker
And that used to be one of the patrol cars for the RCMP on the highways here. Oh, they had they had a couple of Camaros in in the interior for a while. And then everybody switched over to to Crown Vicks.
00:28:02
Speaker
It is suggested by the time he had passed the Ontario Street um overpass on the QEW that he was doing over 210 kilometers per hour. The highway is rated for 100 kilometers per hour 60 miles per hour at the time.
00:28:15
Speaker
Just passing under Lake Street, he lost control, resulting in his car entering into the grass median. Said medium is no longer there, I must add. Okay, look, if if you're going two out ten k down pretty much any provincial highway you've already lost control like well the funny thing is is like that section of the qew is fairly straight at that point like uh once it gets into it has a slight bit of a curve when you go over a lake but like it's really it's just a straight shot until you get to um
00:28:52
Speaker
like the other bridge like it's it's a fairly straight section of highway sure but like i've uh like i've gone and please censor this hey canada it's time to roll into tim hortons and play roll up the rim to win roll up the rim of the conscious cup while you could win one of ten ford explorers 500 sharp cd cereals bleak that please was that in a suzuki esteem Yes.
00:29:23
Speaker
The steering loosens up on that thing at 120.
00:29:27
Speaker
By the way, for those of you who, sorry, this is actually a Patreon exclusive until probably we decide to unlock the episode, I guess. But your Patreon dollars go towards Tamaric finally buying a new-ish to them Suzuki Esteem. i know i know who owns my old one.
00:29:46
Speaker
You're going buy it back? Oh, they'll never sell it back. Okay, let's let's keep this solemn because we're about to talk about somebody dying. he do it to himself. Yeah, but he's also a victim of problems.
00:30:00
Speaker
Yes, of course. As often as often one's death is of ah one's own making, the circumstances that one builds it is... is oft induced so going back just passing under lake street he lost control resulting in his car entering the grass medium like i said the grass medium is not there anymore immediately one of his wheels came caught in a recessed sewer causing the car to flip over several times because he was not wearing a seat belt he was ejected almost 40 meters wear your seat belt I'm going to make an argument about this in a moment.
00:30:34
Speaker
He was ejected almost 40 meters down the road and his car was found flipped up atop of its roof on the Toronto bound lanes. Yeah. Cleared the cleared the grass median. Holy shit.
00:30:46
Speaker
Horton was found during an autopsy to have twice the legal alcohol limit. There was half empty bottle of vodka amongst the crash debris and stimulants and sedatives were found to be on his person.
00:30:57
Speaker
The car had... and person downers Yeah, I don't recommend that as somebody who takes ah um certain medications. Yeah, do not. The car had no mechanical faults, which is miraculous considering it's Italian, and was considered a good working condition.
00:31:15
Speaker
Wow. Okay. It was also suggested that Horton was unaware of him being pursued by police. I should add that-
00:31:26
Speaker
If you're going 210 kilometers per hour, especially in the early 70s, you're not going to end notice a lot of things. Well, the faster you go, like it's been shown, like you get extreme tunnel vision at high speeds.
00:31:37
Speaker
Yeah. So ohs it's it's don't don't speed. Also, don't drink and drive or do any other like performance disenhancing substances and drive.
00:31:48
Speaker
I wrote a rant on my medium about Saskatchewan practically having legal drinking and driving. But anyway, I don't want to get into that subject. Also, it's de facto legal drinking and driving, because like what else is there to do in Saskatchewan?
00:32:02
Speaker
and Outside of Saskatoon, basically. Regina, you just go to if you're a fucking cop. Regular reminder, Scott Moe killed somebody. He may have not killed them all ah killed this person while under the influence, but something to keep in mind.
00:32:17
Speaker
Anyway, I should add that police were desperate to find out that this crash was caused by mechanical fault and not because of alcohol. On the literal day of Tim's funeral, his car was brought into a specialized forensic facility to be looked over top to bottom.
00:32:32
Speaker
They spent more money on trying to figure this out than probably somebody's you know house getting broken into, but that's typical. but People were so fascinated by the car crash that before it was being moved to said facility, kids skipped school and people from all over arrived at a tow yard just three kilometers away from the crash site just to see the wrecked vehicle, causing the yard staff to put a tarp over it.
00:32:54
Speaker
But eventually it was revealed that alcohol and barbiturate use ultimately caused the crash. But the report concluded that if he had wore his seatbelt, he possibly had sort of would have survived.
00:33:05
Speaker
I doubt that. I seriously, if you're going 210 kilometers per hour and like you saw the photo the car wreck photo, which is at the bottom, there's no way that you would survive that sort of like trauma.
00:33:16
Speaker
Yeah, like, okay, the the way to survive that crash is don't do that. But like, wear your fucking seatbelt, because that's the difference between Tim Horton's become or Tim Horton dying, like horrifically in his car, which you can hose off, or becoming a projectile.
00:33:33
Speaker
I have an excerpt. Yeah, you're not going to survive a 40 meters um slingshot. This is an excerpt from the book, A Loving Memory, a tribute to Tim Horton, which is co-written by Laurie Horton, which I believe is his widow, of when Sabres coach Joe Crozier learned of Tim's death.
00:33:50
Speaker
I'm going to read this and I'm going to try and not so screw this up here. At 530, Joe Crozier was woken up by a phone call. We were laying in bed and the damn phone rang. First thing they said was, this is the OPP in St. Catharines, are you Joe Crozier, the coach of the Sabres?
00:34:06
Speaker
I told him yes, and he said, we have one of your players here and we want you to come down here and get him. At this time, most of the Sabres players lived in Fort Erie, and as Joe's wife, Bonnie, recalls, her husband's first reaction was that some of the players might have been out drinking and gotten into trouble.
00:34:22
Speaker
But the officer says, no, no, Joe, there's been an accident. And Joe asked right away, who is it? And he said, it's Tim Horton. That's when we connected it was not a fight, that it was Tim and he was hurt and it was a shock.
00:34:36
Speaker
The guy says, Joe, are you still there? He's hurt. I need you here. And Joe said, well, okay, I'll be there right away. And then the officer told him, Joe, he's hurt badly.
00:34:46
Speaker
And Joe asks, how badly? And then he said, Joe, I need you to identify the body. Joe's initial reaction was that he had to get word to punch Imlach. But at the time, Joe was afraid to tell him.
00:34:57
Speaker
And it occurred to both Joe and Bonnie that a mistake could have been made or that Tim might have loaned his car to someone. Joe and Bonnie called John Butch, the team doctor and a close friend.
00:35:08
Speaker
When we got to s St. Catherine's, Bonnie remembers the OPP were waiting there for us. The three of us went in, and there on the desk was a pair of black glasses. And that's when I knew it was him. And you know what you hope for?
00:35:20
Speaker
Somebody else driving his car. But right then, we just knew. Yeah. that's That's such a typical story for such a situation. Like, like I've never had to deal with this personally, somebody somebody like dying from a traumatic car accident. I've had you know i've had friends die of like sudden heart attacks, and it's always unsettling, but not because of this. is that I've never been party to such a thing.
00:35:43
Speaker
One of the funny things about this story, and this one kind of hit a little close to home, is... A few involved in having to deliver the news to everybody in Horton's life ironically found themselves congregating at one of his locations in Hamilton.
00:35:59
Speaker
And when one of my friends, when I was 20, one of my friends who I had known since I was like seven or eight years old, ah He passed away. He had a cancerous tumor that eventually spread to the rest of his body and became terminal and took his life. And, you know, he was actually married. So he had a widow when he was, you know, 20, 21.
00:36:23
Speaker
twenty twenty one h And the thing that we did it was three of us who had known my friend. His name was Jordan. We had known him so like our whole lives, you know, most of our lives, I should say.
00:36:38
Speaker
And what did we do? We went to Tim Hortons. My dad thought we were going to go to the bar and, you know, drink silly. But like, I didn't know how to drink like that. And I'm glad I never learned. to But we just decided to go to Tim Hortons, got ourselves some coffee and had some donuts and made the worst fucking jokes possible about tumors. Like saying you're going to sell the tumor cells to McDonald's to give for their hamburgers or some stupid shit. I can't even remember the jokes anymore. Grow faster. Yeah, they would.
00:37:09
Speaker
But it's the thing is about Tim Hortons is like, despite the things that I'll say negatively about it, there is a sense of comfort that I have for going to one. And I think that's the reason why I went to it.
00:37:20
Speaker
They're also, particularly if you're... in a small town or semi-rural area like I was when I grew up and spent a lot of time driving highways back back between here and and undisclosed location where my family lives.
00:37:37
Speaker
<unk> It's one of the few places that outside of major centers in Canada, because Canada is very small, we're country of like Less than 40 million people over a huge landmass.
00:37:49
Speaker
It's one of those few places that's open late or even some ah sometimes open 24-7. So like the 24-hour Tim's in undisclosed location was kind of a place where I ended up a lot when in crisis.
00:38:04
Speaker
And I'm glad that it was there. Yeah. The following Monday, Horton's funeral was held at the Oriole York Mills United Church in North York. 1,200 people were in attendance, including every single Sabres player, players from the Leafs who played alongside Horton, NHL president Clarence Campbell, former coaches and various NHL players, both past and present.
00:38:25
Speaker
And i hear that the curse was placed on the Leafs. Yeah, that's kind of... What the thought? I looked into the church and at the time it was relatively new, but it's now known as Bayview after it amalgamated with a local Japanese United Church.
00:38:39
Speaker
I noted this down. It wasn't particularly too interesting, but it it was Reverend William C. Smith that presided over the funeral with Frank Warren as the music director. um The reason why i bring up um all this is when I was looking into the church, I could not figure out how you would squeeze 1,200 people into this place.
00:38:57
Speaker
Maybe at best it could fit 500 people. So you would have had to have been in like absolute crush capacity or people standing outside with the doors open. like It just blows my mind that they managed to shove that many people in there.
00:39:11
Speaker
Probably folks outside and most of them were if they did like a parade past the coffin. In 1977, upon becoming eligible for induction into the Hockey Hall of Fame, he was given that accolade without hesitation.
Tim Horton's Legacy and Franchise Expansion
00:39:24
Speaker
This was despite being called dishonorable by Maple Leafs prior owner, Connie Smythe, of which the Con Smythe Trophy is named for. given to the MVP player of each respective season.
00:39:36
Speaker
And Connie made it a point to, or rather, Connie said that he would do everything in his power to keep him out of set haul. In 1996, Tim Horton's number two jersey was retired by the Buffalo Sabres.
00:39:48
Speaker
Finally, in 2016, the Maple Leafs retired as number seven. Up until 2016, the Leafs treated number seven as a ah number to honor, as the official policy was to never take any numbers out of circulation.
00:40:01
Speaker
As for his car. Which honestly I prefer out of the two policies. Like retirement seems a little bit silly. Because you have a finite number that you can retire. And also then you don't have like the mantle of. Yeah ah like the like the Oilers 99. Yeah.
00:40:16
Speaker
yeah That is like ah as like the captain's number. Could be really cool. and like a thing that you bust out. But yeah. I think. Like after they die. Yeah.
00:40:28
Speaker
I don't know what if there's a limit on number sizes in the league. Technically speaking, um I know that some leagues just have numbers out of... I'm not going to bother. I don't know if they could ever do three-digit numbers. That's the thing I keep thinking about, but it doesn't matter. I think Futurama made a ah good humorous observation of this where they started to use irrational numbers in fractions.
00:40:49
Speaker
Yeah. Because all the all the the entire number space had been retired at some point. As for his car, it was written off after the crash. Surprise.
00:41:00
Speaker
It was never restored. I'm surprised there was enough of it to to to write off. Well, it was never restored, but parts of the car were used for other purposes.
00:41:12
Speaker
The engine for the car was placed into a Mustang racing car used as a part of the National Export A Racing Series. And the engine eventually was parted out with the dipstick supposedly hanging on the wall belonging to the sun of ah said Mustang owner. So like ah usually when a car gets into a wreck, a lot of those parts are just, you know, sent to the wrecker yard. And if you're looking for a specific part for your, say your Suzuki esteem, you probably stand a good chance of finding one from an auto wrecker, right?
00:41:38
Speaker
oh yeah t-boned 2000 uh suzuki steam hatchback was uh a a car that my car was uh a non-zero amount of definitely a whole number percentage of the of the car was was from that a certain point fucking so finicky ass air conditioning system so with tim horton out of the picture what is tim horton's like then well let's let's play clip
00:42:07
Speaker
Enjoy the taste and flavor of a Tim Horton Donut. The aroma of our coffee and the smile we save for you. When you get the urge for freshly brewed coffee, freshly made donuts, head for your favorite donut shop, Tim Horton. We serve only the freshest coffee, donuts, Tim muffins, and Timbits, all with a fresh smile.
00:42:29
Speaker
Tim Horton Donuts. Fresh from your friend along the way. It's coffee has always been trash, but the baked goods used to be so good.
00:42:40
Speaker
Yeah, it's Tim Horne's is not the same, but let's talk about what's happened to it here. A year after ah Horton's death in 1975, Ron Joyce offered to buy Lori out of her shares to which he supposedly agreed. She received a million dollars or roughly 5.4 million today. Not dollars.
00:42:59
Speaker
Loonies. Oh, whatever. Plus a Cadillac Eldorado. She got herself lanyard. Wait, wait a second. I personally, in light of the events that had happened, I would say paying another ah Horton in a car is maybe ah bad look.
00:43:19
Speaker
You know, i when I wrote that down, i went kind of like you gave her a car. it Well, then again, it's car culture. A million dollars in a car that killed her four years later. To be fair, if you can get a Cadillac Eldorado up to 210 kilometers per hour, you've done something wrong.
00:43:36
Speaker
Are you looking up the top speed of an Eldorado from 1975? The thing is a land yacht. and the thing is a land hot Yeah, but it's about power to weight ratio, okay?
00:43:48
Speaker
And this is 75, so it might have actually it might have actually shrunk down bit. It's massive! Yeah, the 60s ones are. Let's look at a... Let's get down. Okay, yeah, it's still big. It's like this it's larger it's larger than than a Dodge Coronet, ah which is kind of the top end of reasonable Yeah.
00:44:11
Speaker
Okay, here's here's what it says on Wikipedia, just so we're clear about the Alorado. The Alorado achieved a 0-60 acceleration in less than 9 seconds, and a top speed of 190 kilometers per hour.
00:44:23
Speaker
Yeah, that's it's that's the 3-speed automatic holding you back, though. And that's with, like, a V8, and it's supposedly 375 horsepower. Like, it's it's not particularly... It's a lanyard. Yeah.
00:44:35
Speaker
Yeah, again, that's ah that's mostly its suspension and... and Wow. 2,100 kilo curb weight? Holy shit. You're not getting this car that fast.
00:44:48
Speaker
You throw a manual in it, you maybe tweak the suspension a little Do you think Lori Gordon has the capability of putting a manual transmission in a 1975 Cadillac Eldorado? That is incredibly sexist of you to suggest that. you think she did that?
00:45:03
Speaker
No. Granted, it was a pace car for the Indianapolis five or for the Indy 500. It's a pace car. It's not meant to race them.
00:45:15
Speaker
Cadillac Eldorado has definitely been used as a dragger. Listen, if you can find me an official race car league that actually races and probably exists. Never mind. Don't bother. I'm pretty certain it exists. God damn it.
00:45:27
Speaker
Like these these old um like 70s rear wheel drive things. I don't know about something as big as an Eldorado are used in drag strips all the time. Yeah, ah like your Plymouth Barracudas and even down into like the Plymouth Reliance and stuff like that. Or Plymouth Valiant, sorry.
00:45:43
Speaker
In Ron Joyce's 2006 autobiography, Always Fresh, he makes mention- do want to add one last thing on the car topic. a Train good, car bad. Okay, fine. I'll agree with you that.
00:45:54
Speaker
In Ron Joyce's 2006 autobiography, Always Fresh, he makes mention of Laurie as being merely what today some would call a puck bunny. And she was in the way of him expanding his donut empire. She was a liability, as he put it. Yeah, Ron Joyce sucks.
00:46:10
Speaker
I would add that she got the right of the deal, as despite the wealth that she and inherited, she was still a single parent to four young daughters, and Joyce was quickly attaining wealth.
00:46:20
Speaker
Yeah, if I if i didn't... it if If it wasn't clear, that the ah getting paid in some cash and also a car in the same way that that Tim Horton was...
00:46:32
Speaker
ah I think this is a raw fucking deal, especially when you see where like where the franchise is now. But like she had a 50 percent stake in this.
00:46:43
Speaker
I'm going to bring up her family later because there's a Hortons in 1975 was not worth two million dollars or loonies. She would later go to sue Ron Joyce as she felt like she got the right out of the deal, but Joyce managed to fend off let said lawsuit.
00:46:59
Speaker
I should add Joyce... Yeah, once it's over. I should add that it's very possible that Joyce was involved in some interesting financial arrangements, as i will word it, As it was remarked in a news bit from 2019 upon his debt passing that he had mortgaged properties that were not his own to finance the expansion of the restaurant.
00:47:16
Speaker
It was also alleged in 2011 that Ron had sexually assaulted an unnamed woman in his home after she had spent the night in his home so he she could drive him to a medical appointment the next day.
00:47:28
Speaker
They initially settled for $50,000 out of court, but due to a disagreement over how it was handled, it eventually went to trial. I don't know what the outcome was. On top of that, at some point later, Lori's home was broken into and many of her husband's hockey memorabilia was stolen, never to be found again.
00:47:45
Speaker
She did get the raw end out of of the deal. Yeah, yeah. So it's 1976 and Tim Horton introduces Timbits.
00:47:59
Speaker
And I often look at the timing of this and the name chosen and shake my head. It's kind of fucked up to call Timbits Timbits. Yeah. I mean...
00:48:11
Speaker
Yeah, because they kind of just get shoved out through the middle of the donut and then packed into a small box. A little morbid.
00:48:21
Speaker
Yeah.
00:48:24
Speaker
In 1984, Tim Hortons makes its first international expansion just north of Buffalo in Tonawanda. Today, it has locations in Delaware, Georgia, Indiana, Kentucky, Maine, Michigan, Minnesota, Missouri, New Jersey, New York, North Dakota, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Texas, and West Virginia, and notably not in Massachusetts because that is Duncan territory.
00:48:46
Speaker
we salute. I will say that Duncan's coffee is worse than Tim Hortons, but Duncan has better donuts. Yeah, which, you know what? ah For being Dunkin's Donuts, that's good. Tim Hortons has neither.
00:49:01
Speaker
So two years later, Roll Up the Rim to Win was launched. So this is
Roll Up the Rim to Win Contest Evolution
00:49:07
Speaker
1986. By peeling the rim of the coffee cup, one could have a free prize ranging from a cup of coffee to a new car.
00:49:14
Speaker
It's amazing that it took COVID to finally kill off this like incredibly disgustingly unhygienic practice. Oh, I have a joke about this. This contest runs every March.
00:49:26
Speaker
Other prizes have included movie tickets at Cineplex, Airbnb gift cards, bicycles, and trips to places like Universal Studios in Florida. The foreskin was removed too many times, so now it's an app with their using their loyalty program.
00:49:43
Speaker
Yeah, that's basically what it was. you You kind of like gave your cup a partial circumcision. And then like towards the like, like the first year of the pandemic, the compromise was, ah was you would hand them your whole cup.
00:49:57
Speaker
I think some places in 2019 were just like, give me the whole fucking cup. Or I'm not taking it. In 1993, Tim Hortons expands beyond donuts and coffee to now include sandwiches.
00:50:08
Speaker
Something I remember as a kid, my mother taking me to eat for lunch as there was a location across from where my grandparents lived. That's all the the same location where we went after my friend died. And it was also around this time that Tim Hortons became known as Tim Hortons.
00:50:23
Speaker
There's no apostrophe on the company name now because of Quebec language laws, otherwise known as Bill 101. The use of a possessive apostrophe is counter to possessive grammar in the French language.
00:50:35
Speaker
So instead of having a different name in our French speaking province, the apostrophe was just removed altogether. That's why it's just Tim Hortons plural. Yes, the many Hortons, Tim. So let's talk about American Tim Hortons and politics. i'm going to play a commercial.
00:50:54
Speaker
It's around the clock freshness that says to you, you've always got time, always got time for Tim Horton.
00:51:05
Speaker
No one said no to dance like this. It's around the clock freshness, around the clock freshness. You've always got time, always got time for Tim Horton.
00:51:20
Speaker
That is the most sensual donut commercial I've ever heard in my life. God, that was that was like real early 90s. Now ah want to say these that song was probably like 92, 93, 94. Like you're probably right on that.
00:51:36
Speaker
I vaguely remember hearing it. And that's now now we're entering the creepy zone where this is shit that I experienced in my life. Yeah, like there's there's been a bunch of different slogans for Tim Hortons. I didn't really talk much about in this episode, rather in this script. um But like, you always got time for Tim Hortons. It's time for Tim's i always fresh, you know, stuff like that.
00:51:57
Speaker
However, on August 8, 1995, everything changed for Tim Hortons as Wendy's merged with it.
Corporate Changes: Tim Hortons and Wendy's
00:52:04
Speaker
This arrangement made Joyce the majority shareholder of, well, Tim Horns, Wendy's, whatever you want to call it.
00:52:10
Speaker
The idea for a merger came from Prince Edward Island businessman Daniel P. Murphy, who in 1992 opened the first combo Wendy's slash Tim Horns in Montague. I believe it's still there as a combo, but you know I'm not certain if it's still the case because they did eventually unmerge. This made Ron Joyce incredibly wealthy.
00:52:31
Speaker
But as Susan Kastner of the Toronto Star on August 3rd, 1995 put it, shall we examine Tim Hortons selling out to Wendy's, the spectacle of another great Canadian icon, one more priceless chocolate coconut cream filled Dutchie glaze, crueller Timbit of her precious heritage gone to Yankee burger fat, out the menus of the two chains by blending Tim Hortons morning meals and snacks with the strength enjoyed by Wendy's in lunches and dinners.
00:52:58
Speaker
burp and nobody around to pass the maalox so spit spit spit i honestly never thought ah like susan castner i would i would be i would be on the same page as her or any other star writer but ah holy shit yeah susan castner a name you haven't heard for for ages but She died last year. um see She would have been in her 50s at this point. like she I don't even know when she stopped writing for the Toronto Star, but like I know she retired.
00:53:39
Speaker
I don't even remember when she retired from writing. like but yeah The thing is, is like like she nailed exactly what was about to happen because like getting paired up with with Wendy's, yeah, that's pretty that's pretty fucking awful. It's current state today.
00:53:57
Speaker
way worse like burger king doesn't even have like decent fries yeah but they do have impossible burgers so who's to say yes it's it's so literally the only thing going for them if they lived in a if they existed in a universe that didn't have canadian a w and so which is just superior in every way around 2005 whorne's in canada outnumbered mcdonald's in terms of both outlets and sales However, a young man from Bay Street claiming to be a Calgarian cowboy wanted to bring back Timmy's to Canada.
00:54:28
Speaker
And in 2009, Prime Minister Stephen Harper began to claim that the repatriation of Tim Hortons that year was the result of his Tory government's taxation policy. This was the unmerger. In June of that year,
00:54:41
Speaker
it was announced with shareholder approval that Tim Warren's would be reorganized into a publicly traded company under the name Tim Warren's Inc. and traded as a Canadian public company.
00:54:52
Speaker
By this point, Joyce was a decade out of the picture and it was demerged from Wendy's basically, although many dual locations exist and they remain. There's, I can think of one in Metro Vancouver and it's off a freeway.
00:55:05
Speaker
Yeah, I can think of another in the interior and it's also off a freeway. Back in 2006, Tim Hortons was clearly a political item. So we're going a little bit back before, but I did want to at least talk about Stephen Harper. It was clearly political item as that year they opened their first and only location in Afghanistan for Canadian forces and their NATO allies.
00:55:26
Speaker
was just seeing the urge when you were listing the American states that had them, uh, of of blurting out Kandahar province, but it was a little too soon. So there are photos of of Harper walking by the Afghan Tim Hortons. It closed in 2011. In twenty eleven s election and campaign, he made it a point to stop and shake hands at a Tim Hortons location in Dieppe.
00:55:48
Speaker
Not to be outdone in the same campaign, we saw the late Jack Layton of the and NDP campaigning at a location in Welland, Ontario. and in an election prior in 2005 um then liberal prime minister paul martin made a stop at a location in woodstock ontario for better for worse tim hortons is where you meet the middle class who might vote for you despite what it is it has become a cultural icon in this country and they play to it like holy shit yeah like that's to tim hortons is pretty aggressively canadian in in the uk as you saw
00:56:21
Speaker
But it's got nothing on the just tidal wave of Canadiana inside even the most like ah humble of Tim Hortons. Like they it in your face.
00:56:32
Speaker
So the the wild thing about the Afghan one, I was hoping to talk with somebody about this, but unfortunately ah just time wasn't working out. This is a sign from the Tim Horns in Kandahar. During a rocket attack, Tim Horns will close immediately after the alarm. We will reopen approximately 15 minutes after the all clear.
00:56:50
Speaker
And then it says, thank you for your patience at the bottom. You know you know why it's 15 minutes, right? Because if it's 25, we have to give you coffee. Yes.
00:57:02
Speaker
But it says on the bottom, it's just like, thank you for your patience, as in like, wait, what? And of course, not to be politically opportunistic, but it's also a political hot potato. So let's briefly talk about its use of temporary foreign workers or TFWs.
00:57:17
Speaker
Oh, it's the TFWs that are the bread and butter of the small business tyrants of Canada. Yeah, a lot of them own Tim Hortons. We often see a lot of them own Tim Hortons. We often see this topic in the news today, but there are articles from 2012 showing the chain at the center of controversy of the program and how people were brought from afar to made to work for to serve Canadians, all the while being exploited.
00:57:39
Speaker
um Yeah, like we we give we give Dubai a bunch of flack for importing construction labor and treating them absolutely terribly. to importance, by the way. In near slavery. getting there uh uh uh we have a very similar program and while they get to keep their passports they're they're no less trapped here so yeah it's pretty fucked up like that's the problem with the tfw program not that we allow brown people into the country which is what the conservatives think is wrong with the tfw program There have been situations where they've been given substandard housing attached to their employment at Tim Horns, and typically they'd be paying a franchisee for that space. So there's that fucked up problem that's come up before.
00:58:21
Speaker
oh yeah. The other thing I can go on and on about the bullshit around the TFW program. But what I'm going to say is, in short, if you treat anyone at a Tim Horns of any level of gruff, fuck you, because you stand a good chance of living in better conditions than the person at the counter.
00:58:36
Speaker
Yeah, like, the way that these TFW programs work is, like, you could say that if they don't like the service job, then they can quit. But no, they literally can't. If they do, they get the boarded.
00:58:46
Speaker
Because, like, if they... The only avenue... As a temporary foreign worker, you do have an avenue, I think, to getting... um like a work permit of some sort, but like your employment is so tied to that TFW permit that you have that, you know, if you decide to leave your job, you're going home.
00:59:03
Speaker
Yeah. You get to port, like you get, you get deported either voluntarily or involuntarily. And if you go involuntarily, you're never getting back into the country ever again. Cause we have some really, really rigid immigration and even like visitor visa laws.
00:59:19
Speaker
If you've got if you got booted from the country once, you can never come back. You can, but it's like it's such an the process is so onerous that you probably aren't going to get through it. Yeah, you will never cross the border unfrustrated for the rest of your life at the very at the very best scenario.
00:59:36
Speaker
Moving on, we're going to talk about Tim Horan's getting a Brazilian. um ah Five years after becoming a publicly traded company, 3G Capital's Burger King worldwide and Tim Horan signed a deal to merge and form restaurant brands international aka rbi still headquartered committed the crime of not buying arby's still headquartered in toronto this is how burger cane tim horn's popeyes and firehouse subs became one company and as it stands in 2023 tim horns has over 4 000 locations in canada over 500 in the united states
01:00:12
Speaker
34 in Mexico, 50 the United Kingdom, six in Spain, three in Pakistan, 500 in China, 10 in Thailand, 20 in the Philippines, three in India, 124 in Saudi
Tim Hortons' International Presence
01:00:24
Speaker
Arabia. ah bet there's one at Neom and 40 scattered amongst like a few other Middle East countries.
01:00:31
Speaker
Well, there have to be several because none of them are going be like walking distance. So they have to be spaced across the line. Could you just imagine all the number of Tim Horns you would need in fucking Neon? Like, Neon's never to get built. But it's like, oh my god, Neon.
01:00:45
Speaker
This is not a podcast that discuss Neon, but Jesus Christ. My hot take is I think they will actually build the line. And I think it'll be a massive catastrophe. And yeah. ah that's ah that's my That's my take. they're they're I firmly believe they will actually end up building some semblance of it.
01:01:02
Speaker
And it'll be like the sad Dubai ah like world map, ah like Atlas Island. Do you think Mohammed bin Salman likes Tim Hortons? And there's 124 in that country. Maybe he does.
01:01:16
Speaker
I think he is a man incapable of any joy. ah Or at least if there's any justice in the world, he is a man incapable of any joy. No, he's he's basically an ADHD tyrant who will like you know find a way to sew you up in a backpack you know conveniently.
01:01:32
Speaker
Yeah, and b and be on the fucking Zoom call while his spooks do it. Well, a couple days ago, Tamarack and I got together and we watched a play.
01:01:43
Speaker
And I'm going to play a clip from it, so I'll let this play now. What would you do for a Timbit?
01:01:53
Speaker
When the night is cold and the light is gone
01:02:00
Speaker
Sometimes it only takes a little bit A tiny bit to help you carry on, carry on And so we fly That was a clip from The Last Timbit, a play that was made for the 60th anniversary of Tim Hortons' existence.
01:02:22
Speaker
it It's about some people who get snowed in in a Tim Hortons, which is a thing that kind of has happened to me. But they perplexingly released it in the middle of fucking summer.
01:02:34
Speaker
so I get to talk about theater again, and this time I bring up Michael Rubinoff, creator of the longest running Canadian musical in Broadway history, Come From Away.
The Play 'The Last Timbit' Overview
01:02:44
Speaker
It's a story about Gander, Newfoundland, and its role in the September 11th attacks.
01:02:48
Speaker
He and Brian Hill are brought together to produce a show called The Last Timbit, which had a limited run at the Elgin Theatre in Toronto in June of this year, as Tamarack noted. Now, we don't live in Toronto, but I became aware of it being available on the streaming service Crave.
01:03:04
Speaker
So i invited Tamarack and their dog Lupe to come over and watch. We did record ourselves watching it. I am mulling over whether or not I want to release this as a little like a little special bonus episode for you can watch along to hear us riffing on it.
01:03:20
Speaker
We'll see. It's fantastic. What did you think of the play? I think it for like a stage production. i used to be a big musical nerd. but Part and parcel. yeah the Band nerd.
01:03:33
Speaker
I was never in theater. ah But I definitely like hung around the weird theater kids. ah Probably because we were all queer. And half of us trans. I think like the production itself is actually quite good.
01:03:47
Speaker
They make some like absolutely genius decisions when it comes to scene transitions. It takes place basically with one static set. And the way that they flip between inside-outside or like do little cutaways...
01:04:02
Speaker
is really quite clever with the very limited material they have. And the actors are just killing it. ah The script is dog shit, though. Like, the story? The story is awful.
01:04:13
Speaker
Yeah, like, with the story, like, we got, like, the story was serviceable for the first hour and a bit, but then but get to this one scene, and I won't, like, I won't spoil it, but it was a conversation between two characters, a mother and daughter. No one gives a Just spoil it. No.
01:04:30
Speaker
Well, to put it lightly, the mom is divorced and she made it seem like she was only sticking around because she felt like she had to, but was feeling like abandoning her daughter anyway. And like never really explained why she wanted to leave to go live in Toronto. I think this took place in Hamilton or something.
01:04:49
Speaker
and it's just it was like all goodwill that this play had was just completely nuked with this one scene like they send the they spend the first half basically with a with a two two subplots revolving these two one is with the daughter who has a crush on on uh charlie olivia i but what would you call it um charlivia charlivia Yeah, Charlivia.
01:05:16
Speaker
stan Charlivia. We ship them. Who's the second clarinetist in her band class. Again, being a band kid, i i kind of appreciated this. And she was being kind of shy and awkward, but also she's there with her mom and wanted to not want to to like talk about this, let alone flirt with the guy in front of her mom.
01:05:35
Speaker
Her mom, on the other hand, is like trying to connect with her daughter because she's feeling disconnected and get some help from some other people who are stuck in the Tim Hortons. And this all culminates to a scene in the car where Olivia, the daughter, finally like cracks and is just like, I don't understand left left the life that we had with dad and with me and stuff like that and you left and now you're moving to toronto and this excruciatingly long sequence the mom dishes out a lot of platitudes makes a lot of excuses and never actually answers the question of why she did it she just it's excuse after excuse after excuse and then they hug like it's resolved
01:06:17
Speaker
We just we just watch the the plot resolution of this mother and daughter is the mother just gaslights the ever living fuck out of her. And I guess that's okay. Yeah, that's the best way to describe it. I was just there was a lot of reviews.
01:06:30
Speaker
I shouldn't say there's a lot of reviews. There's least one review in particular. And it's escaped me at the moment where 50% of the reviews one yeah they They didn't give it good, like any sort of accolades. They they did say it was a bad play.
01:06:47
Speaker
And I'm going to agree, but I will say that the actors did great. The set design was great and the music design was great. The story was dog shit. Yeah, the the actors were up there polishing a turd and it still managed to glisten every now and then.
01:07:01
Speaker
Yeah, at some point, I'm going to go and figure out if I like the audio. And if it is, we'll make it a little bit of an extra. might come out a couple weeks after this. And you can use it as a riff tracks if we're if you feel inclined to.
01:07:15
Speaker
um It's available on Crave. I don't know if it's available for a limited time. If you're outside of the country, i if you manage to get yourself a copy of this... congratulations, it will not be touring. It's never going to appear on Broadway or the West End.
01:07:28
Speaker
Yeah. ah the The review scale that I would like to use on this is is is twofold. ah Would you get a Crave subscription that you pay for watch? No, because I stole it from my friend.
01:07:43
Speaker
My friend left my Apple TV signed in and she said it was fine. Plus she's in Japan, so she's not using it right now. Way to bury the lead, but also like are way to undermine it. But anyway, ah did the the the next rank of that is if not, if Crave was there, ah freely available, would you watch it? Which I guess clearly yes, but if it wasn't for content, would you watch this?
01:08:09
Speaker
oh No. Okay. And then the the final, the final tier. If it was already playing, would you change the channel or turn off the TV?
01:08:19
Speaker
Depends if it's my house. ah Let's say no. But you've been given permission to do so. um As a house guest, I'll i'll make a judgment call. Oh, well, you're so polite.
01:08:30
Speaker
It's not my home. Well, despite Tim Hortons now belonging to an international conglomerate and Ron Joyce having been out of the picture since the late 90s, he passed away in early 2019, it still remained in a Horton air in some fashion until just last year.
Tim Horton's Family Connection
01:08:46
Speaker
Ron Joyce's son, Ron Joyce Jr., eventually married Tim Hortons' eldest daughter, Jerry Lynn. and ended up owning four franchises in Coburg, Ontario, which is 100 kilometers of Toronto, until their retirement in 2023.
01:09:01
Speaker
I should add that these people suck nearly just as much as Joyce Sr. as from this 2023 Globe and Mail excerpt. In 2018, she and Mr. Joyce drew widespread criticism after they cut back on paid breaks and reduced employee benefits at two locations in Coburg.
01:09:18
Speaker
A memo from the owners claimed that the changes were necessary because of an increase in Ontario's minimum wage that year. Yeah, the so like the big thing that really like after they moved to like the centralized bakeries in Tim Hortons, the main thing that they are cooking up at the franchise locations is wage theft.
01:09:38
Speaker
Well, they used to have proper bakers at every location. Every, every, ah yeah, they just don't have the equipment to make all those donuts yeah in-house. they just They're just reheating them in basically a pizza oven.
01:09:52
Speaker
but let's let's Let's bitch about Tim Hortons once I finish these last two points here. um the These two locations, sorry. how Well, this wasn't bitching about Tim Hortons. This is actually relevant to what you're saying, which is, like, I'm involved in union organizing. And, like, even outside of that role, like, people who have worked at Tim's, one of the common complaints is...
01:10:15
Speaker
Breaks are always getting sliced or they're being scheduled. Places that are compliant are scheduling people exactly for five hours so they don't owe them a break. And like all sorts of scheduling shenanigans and just outright wage theft just to to save a buck on these franchises.
01:10:33
Speaker
And Tim Hortons corporate can kind of feign ignorance on this because it's on the franchisee, not... Tim Horton's corporate their policy is to actually pay their workers but yeah here we have like the majority owner of Tim Horton's corporate running a like his kids running a fucking ah franchise chain and doing just all the regular shit in tim's so these locations still remain with a family member but um there was like a thing from the in the news a couple years ago where they just weren't happy with the arrangement tim horns has with rbi or something like that um and on the topic of family members and i haven't said anything because i didn't want to say it till the end my father worked for tim horns inc uh for a number of years but i'm not going to talk much about it because um i don't really feel like it
01:11:20
Speaker
Oh, it just felt like Matt Droppingman. And I had a personal connection to Tim Hortons corporate. um And obviously, I've said a lot of negative things about Tim Hortons. I should tell you how much I care about. Well, my dad's retired, so it doesn't matter.
01:11:31
Speaker
But like, yeah, going back to the whole point, like Tim Hortons changed a lot in the 2000s. Like they used to have in-store bakers. They used to have. Yes. um Like people on staff who were.
01:11:44
Speaker
you know, good at the craft, you know, like, um and around 2005-2006, they decided to move towards having centralized facilities. So like, for example, if you are in Vancouver, all of your donuts come from Calgary. If you are in, let's say, like, say in Thunder Bay, all of your of donuts come from um Oakville.
01:12:07
Speaker
And it's, that is just what has become of Tim Hortons in the past, you know, 20 years. it no longer does anything there. Uh, it does everything offsite.
01:12:18
Speaker
And that's when a lot of the quality went downhill. That is also the reason why I suspect that they got rid of bread bowls because the bread bowls just don't ship well. They don't work what they're with their, with their, um,
01:12:31
Speaker
cooking setup and they also got rid cakes for similar reasons i forgot that they had cakes yeah tim's cakes the tim's like double chocolate cake was fucking amazing egg i still made my throat numb though they also had um tarts and all that like the thing that stayed consistent is that they've always had sandwiches since they've introduced the sandwiches but i'm gonna make my complaint here is that like here's the thing i'm just socked now Yeah, well, that's the the big problem I have with is like, there's nothing really for me and especially you at Tim Hortons most of the time.
01:13:06
Speaker
And like, when I went to the UK, and I had a ate myself like a breakfast, it was really good. It was everything tasted I enjoyed my meal at Tim Horan's in London.
01:13:20
Speaker
It, you know, like it wasn't like, oh my God, the best meal I've had during my trip to the UK. I had a seriously great meal as well as in the UK, but I wanted to go out there for two reasons. One, it was a curiosity and two for this particular podcast episode.
01:13:32
Speaker
And, you know, it's really upsetting to see that the experience that I have in the UK is so much different than here. Like as a vegetarian, my only options for Tim Hortons are those god awful flatbread pizzas. I had one and...
01:13:50
Speaker
and they look rough okay so the thing is is that the sauce that they used for yeah the pizzas was akin to the filipino sweet sauce that they used for spaghetti and you know i don't mind that sauce it's not my go-to sauce i prefer something more savory spaghetti Yeah, but like on a pizza? No. And like it was just a like a cheese pizza or a veggie pizza. I can't remember what it was anymore. This was almost a month ago that I had it.
01:14:20
Speaker
and Yeah, like you can get away with a sweet pizza sauce if you're doing like a like a Hawaiian like a ham and pineapple. Yeah, which is legit. Don't come at me. It's good pizza. No, I and know you call it a tropical pig if you're having a ham.
01:14:33
Speaker
Anyway, do continue. No, you're not. I wasn't going to come at you. You had the right opinion. Pineapple on pizza is fine. Yeah, no, I just I'm I you know, there's going to be somebody like it's going to be our first fucking bit of engagement on any of these podcast platforms.
01:14:49
Speaker
Well, that's okay.
01:14:51
Speaker
this is Oh, yeah, sorry. Wait a second. ah Yeah, if you if you don't believe. All right, that's true. If you disagree with my pizza take, then then thanks for the money.
01:15:03
Speaker
You know, like there's a lot of things that just don't exist at Tim Hortons anymore that I thought were good. They had veggie burgers in 2019. and Yeah, for like a hot minute.
01:15:14
Speaker
I think COVID killed them. Like Wendy's also had veggie burgers and then COVID killed that too. And it's just, don't know. Burger King flirted with the Impossible Whopper for a little bit.
01:15:24
Speaker
They still have it. And the A&W is just like... No, they
Menu Critique: Vegetarian Options and Quality Disparity
01:15:27
Speaker
still have it. i you i go i That's one my go-tos when I'm um looking for festival. That's why I said they they flirted with it. they they They're kind of insies and outsies because they discontinued it for a while and then brought it back.
01:15:38
Speaker
It must have been a States thing. Weird. don't know. Maybe. Yeah. Whatever. It's annoying. The problem is, like, vegetarian and fast food are, like, unless you're in the UK. Because even McDonald's has McPlant.
01:15:50
Speaker
And you can get yourself a vegan burger at McDonald's in the UK. um Yeah, but my my my counterpoint to that is, ah especially in Canada, like, if you want, like, vegan fast food, like, A&Dubs kind of just, like, blew everyone out of the water by getting getting not only an Impossible Burger, and getting, like, Impossible Burger, which... Oh, it's Beyond there, actually.
01:16:13
Speaker
Pardon? Oh, yeah, it's Beyond, sorry. yeah Yeah. They got the Beyond Burger. And not only that, they got it, they they made it cheaper. So it's not a, it's not, it's a little thinner than the store bought one, but also like, while Beyond's not my patty, like not my favorite of the like fake meat things, I don't really, I'm not really a fake meat enjoyer, vegan anyway.
01:16:35
Speaker
Like they didn't make it like an extremely premium product. It's not much more expensive than just getting the regular burger. Yeah, I'll agree with you on that. it's But at the end of the day, going to Tim Hortons, all it's good for is I forget to eat breakfast at my house and I find myself wandering through one of the SkyTrain stations in downtown Vancouver, which all three of them have a Tim Hortons within walking distance or within the station.
01:17:03
Speaker
And all I pretty much the only thing I can have in the morning is hash brown, the egg bites, coffee, tea, a drink or donut. And then all the sandwiches they have, as much as I would love to have them, do not have anything vegetarian. and And it fucking sucks.
01:17:21
Speaker
Yeah. the For me, ah visiting folks in the interior, it's a long ass drive. Usually I usually one that if I start in the evening, I'm I'm like hitting some of these towns that are places to stop at like 10 11 sometimes past midnight tim's is a place that's open and you can always count on getting just like a plain bagel with a with some some strawberry spread and a bit of sadness and a twinge of sadness and some offensively substandard coffee will um
01:17:54
Speaker
their espresso drinks are good though yeah was gonna say i was gonna close on my comments about their coffee their coffee is serviceable it's not like you're paying like there's a reason why we set the patreon so low it's because well tim horn's coffee is so cheap we based our prices for the patreon off of what tim horns themselves offer well that i think has been a podcast i think we should talk about what we learned Uh... Yep, Timbits are that irresistible.
01:18:22
Speaker
Try new lemon or raspberry. Just $1.99 for a 10-pack. It's summer. Ha ha ha! Oh my god, that is your takeaway?
01:18:36
Speaker
ha ha! On Queen Elizabeth Way outside Burlington has high velocity. Oh, it's too bad. Nobody's ever gonna learn what you just said.
01:18:48
Speaker
Ha ha ha! And then was later, much like the rest of Tim Hortons, ah stolen by Joyce, who repurposed it for his own profit.
01:19:00
Speaker
I learned that the Suzuki Esteem is a very good vehicle to go do a Tim Hortons run. Oh, yeah. Plenty of Tim Hortons runs. That car is my go-to and I spent a lot of time in like shitty beastc small BC towns.
01:19:12
Speaker
Well, thank you for listening to this for now a Patreon exclusive episode of Shewinigan Moments. We will be back with a free episode probably two weeks after this one comes out. That's probably when I'll release it.
01:19:25
Speaker
and Yeah, sorry about the gap, everybody. i went from working zero jobs to working two jobs, and that sucked. Never let me do that again. Yeah, and I've been resting with um an injury because when I came back from camping, I slammed my knee right into a doorknob.
01:19:44
Speaker
Yeah, and then my car tires got slashed on the weekend, too. It wasn't me. No, it was I'm not going to get into it on this podcast episode. But anyway, thanks for listening, everybody. And we'll see you on the free side. Goodbye. bye yeah
01:20:11
Speaker
Shawinigan Moments is written and recorded on the unceded territories of the Squamish, Musqueam, Stolo, and Sewatuth First Nations in what is otherwise called Vancouver.