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00:00:01
Aren't You Going To Let The Grim Reaper Get A Little Heat?
51 Plays3 years ago
After a week off the the whole crew is back! They're chatting Ric Flair's payday, Revolution, ICW, Minoru Suzuki's Karaoke Jam and more!
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Transcript
Introduction and Hosts' Banter
00:00:34
Speaker
Hey everybody, welcome to another episode of Predetermined, a pro wrestling hangout. I'm your host, Garrett Callender, resurrected from the dead. And with me, as always, two men I haven't seen for two weeks. I love their faces. Chris Miggs, Jimmy Fax. I am just, I told you that when you go to those coffee shops in Queens, that there's always people with COVID just coughing loudly and just hacking things into the air.
00:01:01
Speaker
It's what we do. It's what us urban folk do. We go to crowded coffee shops in Brooklyn and Queens, and we spray COVID everywhere, and you didn't follow our advice, Garrett.
00:01:14
Speaker
That's on you. Yeah. Well, I took your advice on getting it, though. You know, you go to just middle of nowhere, Tennessee. There's not a vaccine in sight. And I just sat in not a coffee shop, but a diner and just waited.
00:01:33
Speaker
Just waited. I talked to everybody about the weather. I asked everybody that passed how they were doing. Occasionally, an old man would sit with me and we'd exchange pleasantries. And I licked every dirty dish I saw in the place. And God damn it, if I didn't get it. Garrett, Garrett's still here. But that old sneezing man who told him about how wrestling was better back in the old days is no longer with us, unfortunately.
00:02:00
Speaker
And the server who said, you know it's fake, right? She's also dead because I killed her.
Podcast Cancellations and Comedy Club
00:02:10
Speaker
It's real to me, damn it.
00:02:13
Speaker
No, I was really out. When there was a possibility of us recording together, it would have actually been interesting to do because I had such bad brain fog that I don't know what would have come out of my mouth. I would have been like everybody's racist uncle. The old man from the diner was inhabiting your brain.
00:02:42
Speaker
Yeah, it was a real possession moment where the ghost of COVID's past actually took over and yeah, he took me over and who knows what I would have said. This podcast would have been canceled. I mean, I feel like that's a role you're gonna have on the podcast at some point. So it would have been just like the ghost of future yet to come. Do you think one of us is gonna get canceled at some point? We are.
00:03:11
Speaker
You know, look at us. We were three white guys with a podcast. It's somebody's bound to slip up. Yeah, I mean, we don't have that like Bill Burcred that we can just say whatever and be it's it's fine.
00:03:27
Speaker
I mean, Joe Rogan's still a thing though, so I don't know. We just gotta move to Austin and start new lives. They did just open a woke comedy club, or a not woke comedy club in Austin. Sounds hilarious.
00:03:43
Speaker
Yeah, if you were into Roseanne Barr comedy specials in 2023, it's for you. You know, there's nothing that is funnier than just good old-fashioned conservative values and, you know, evangelical rhetoric.
Wrestling in Conservative Areas
00:04:03
Speaker
You know, the humor is either gonna be like something you'd hear in Branson, or you just go up and talk about how you can't talk about anything anymore. And especially if you're a man, you can only wear a blue button-down shirt and khakis. Anything else in Tennessee at this point is drag.
00:04:27
Speaker
Fuck. Yeah. Wrestling might have a problem in Tennessee, right? Like, wrestling gear is pretty provocative. I'm pretty sure people wore drag on Memphis wrestling shows at some point. There's no way that didn't happen. As long as you work heel, I think it's fine. Okay.
00:04:49
Speaker
I, man, I live in the worst state right now. And it's fun to see my politicians on all the late night shows every night. You know, all those guys I voted for. I didn't vote for them guys. They're bad people. Did anyone watch wrestling in the last two weeks?
Garrett's Adventures in Tennessee
00:05:11
Speaker
I watched a little.
00:05:14
Speaker
I watched almost all of Revolution in a Dave and Busters in Memphis, Tennessee. I think that's where I got COVID was from you being there. I caught it. That's exactly modus ponens. Yeah.
00:05:30
Speaker
I'll be honest, I'm very jealous. I love a good trip to Dave & Buster's. I like to order some sort of blue drink, play the coin pushers, and, you know, spend $300 to leave with $20 worth of crap. It was okay. I mean, it was a very, the, the, where they had the screen set up were very far from the actual Dave & Buster's stuff.
00:05:54
Speaker
Um, also, uh, they had no servers. So you had to order the food to go and then just bring it over there. Um, it wasn't going to get in door dash to your table. Right. Yes. Yes. Um, but the screen was very large. Um, and the crowd was, uh, excited for at least some of it. So.
00:06:16
Speaker
It was a good experience. I was, I was down, um, in Oxford, Mississippi for some concerts. And so I was like, on the way, I realized I was like, we have a night in Memphis and there's nothing else to do in Memphis. So I feel like you just blew by that pretty quickly of like, it was just the most casual, normal thing in the world. Like, Oh, it was just in Oxford, Mississippi for concerts, you know, like people do.
00:06:39
Speaker
You haven't followed, your favorite band, one of your favorite bands hasn't gotten back together, but they're from Mississippi, so that's where their reunion shows are. I haven't even- It was the ghost of Macho Man doing his rap album. Yeah, that's actually, that's headlining the arena in Memphis next week.
Comedic Wrestling Scenarios
00:07:01
Speaker
It's gonna be, Jerry Lawler's gonna fight the ghost and it's gonna be great.
00:07:06
Speaker
And guess who's COVID free and three hours away, baby? Not Jerry Lawler. He might not have COVID, but he definitely still has syphilis. Jerry's been defeating ghosts for years, though.
00:07:23
Speaker
he's he hulks up takes the strap down punches the grim reaper in the face gives it a pile driver and he's he just keeps going over people are like aren't aren't you gonna let the grim reaper get like some heat he's like no no
00:07:37
Speaker
So, so that, and I know this, this isn't, you know, this is a little bit of a go and take a left turn here, but did you guys see, this is like maybe, maybe about two weeks ago or a week ago, there was these reports that people were being critical of Rick Flair's last match. Right. And that and, and Flair's like comeback was, well, you know what? I got paid 300 grand for that match.
00:08:01
Speaker
And I can't decide. So on one hand, that's obviously a lot of money for one night of work. It doesn't seem like that much money for possibly dying when you're a very famous person. Well, like it seems like it both an overpay and an underpay at the same time. I think that we aren't thinking about one thing. You and I haven't seen what kind of bills he's got. And at a certain point, like.
00:08:32
Speaker
What's better, living or paying off that bookie? Well, it's probably just was all cash from Conrad. Just Conrad has like a bomb silo, like a bomb shelter underneath his house.
00:08:48
Speaker
when they do fake his death is where he's going to live and he'll just have hookers sent down to pay with his cash. So really this is just like, even Rick Flair's gotta be like, well, what do I got? Maybe top six years left. I need six years worth of bomb shelter hooker money. 300 grand should be about right.
00:09:11
Speaker
I'm just picturing a guy in a leather jacket with a tire iron that's just like, it's gonna be pretty fucking hard to do a figure four with no legs. It would be hard to be that enforcer having to collect the money from Ric Flair. Big fan. I know that you're probably gonna die right now, but. So he made 300 grand off that show. That's what he said himself.
00:09:40
Speaker
But he is more trustworthy than, say, a Hulk Hogan, right? Like, where do we stand on believing things Rick Flair says? I believe it because, again, it's just, it's such a weird, like, if he was going to make it up, you'd think he'd say, I made a million dollars, right? Like, he would have made 400, but Conrad deducted the booze expenses from the check. He would have made, it was like a hundred grand in Kamikaze shots, so.
00:10:07
Speaker
And if they had just gone to Kid Rock's for the weekend, Kid Rock would have just covered it himself. Thank God the after party was there. What do you think Danielson got for wrestling an Iron Man match that went into overtime on a pay-per-view? What do you think his payday was? Nowhere near 300 grand, right?
00:10:34
Speaker
Probably not for that one match. I mean, I'm curious actually how much, I'd be curious how much, if he gets any sort of bonuses on the big pay-per-views, but yeah, probably not for that match. Part of him taking abuse, he really wants to go back to that hot dog in a handshake kind of thing. Like Brie hates it, but he wants to get, he loves the endies. And even though he's not there, he wants to feel like he's there. So he doesn't take any pay and he would have gone another hour.
00:11:02
Speaker
Yeah, and he's a better husband than Mox and is jealous that Mox is getting to live his best life while being a famous television wrestler. And he's just like, God damn that guy. He really, I mean, he really wants to be doing this every weekend, but he's just like, I do love my wife and kids. And Mox is just like, I'll be in Iowa. See you next week, Brian.
00:11:29
Speaker
What's in Iowa? I don't, I don't. Me, a barn and Willie Mac. I just, I just heard they opened up some new Mexican joint in Iowa. I figure there might be some luchadores that want to throw down the parking lot. I brought some masks if they don't have their own. I can blade them through it. It's fine.
00:11:56
Speaker
I didn't bring any thumbtacks, but I figured we'd just crunch up some tostitos and put those all over them. Get real sharp. They get real sharp at the end, you know? Like, I could see that, like, mocks
AEW Pay-Per-View Discussion
00:12:09
Speaker
bringing, you know, just... I don't want to see human trafficking. That sounds bad. But, like, using his wealth for a pipeline of alluchedores illegally into Iowa for him to throw down with.
00:12:27
Speaker
No audience, just in a cornfield. What happened? Well, Officer, he covered me up and made me bleed. But then he gave me like 30 grand and sent me back.
00:12:52
Speaker
So overall, what did you guys think of the pay-per-view? I know like we're two weeks removed from this so the listeners like we already listened to everybody talk about this, but So I didn't see it live And I didn't see it in Tennessee. I was and I'm gonna be out of town for the next pay-per-view So I'm gonna miss that one
00:13:11
Speaker
Being fax loco in a wedding in Canada I missed this one because of a family obligation. So I saw it the next day But completely unspoiled I was spoiled on on zero of it. I had zero I had avoided all spoilers and I kind of came in with pretty low expectations. I was not super excited and pumped for it. It was kind of like
00:13:36
Speaker
I guess I got to watch this thing and I enjoyed the crap out of it. I thought it was really good. Um, it's just, it's an AEW pay-per-view. They're just all really good. I felt like my, it almost exactly met my expectations. Like I thought three matches were going to be great.
00:13:55
Speaker
and those three matches were great. I'd say at least one of them, which would be Mox and Hangman kind of exceeded my expectations in terms of like, I was like, I did not realize how far they were going to go. My wife was horrified because she was at that, the Dave and Busters at me. And the moment where Mox just starts jabbing the fork in Hangman's face, she was like, Oh no, no, no. And I was like, Oh yes, also we're three minutes into this match. This is going to get worse.
00:14:25
Speaker
The visuals of that blood splattering onto Moxley's chest as he stabbed him with the fork was incredible. What did your wife order at Dave & Buster's that she was eating while that was happening? I think she was eating some kind of chicken sandwich, which was admittedly not great. We were also going to town on some very mediocre nachos.
00:14:54
Speaker
So that may have been part of it. Maybe her stomach was starting to turn from the food. I most, I ate a lot of fried cauliflower to maybe to keep my stomach really kind of together. You know what I mean?
00:15:06
Speaker
I don't want you to blame Buff, not Buffalo Wild Wings. I don't want you to blame Dave & Buster's for the quality of the food. It was just, you know, once you order DoorDash, it takes a while to get there. It probably got, you know, the quality went down on the drive over. They drove it around for a few hours before they brought it to us. It was actually from another Dave & Buster's in Mississippi. They had to get it over there.
00:15:32
Speaker
You know, it's funny you mention it because my wife, for whatever reason, during that match just came downstairs and they'll just sat on the couch and started reading a book, which is not a thing she does. And she just chose to do it for just this one match. And obviously she keeps looking up and just getting disgusted. Like she's probably, I know she's not reading Jane Austen, but in my recollection, she's reading like Pride and Prejudice or something. And then she's looking, ah, that match was awesome though.
00:15:59
Speaker
No, that was really great. You said that three great matches you said. So I assume main event that match. What was the third for you? How's the black and the elite? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, honestly, maybe the best match of the night. I don't know what I go. I go mocks. Hangman is my match of the night. Yeah. But I wouldn't argue with somebody getting splattered in blood. Yeah.
00:16:24
Speaker
But our friend, uh, our friend Dave Meltzer definitely disagrees that this is even a conversation about these three matches. Cause he's apparently according to him, this was the Iron Man match was the best match of Brian Danielson's career. Five and three quarter stars. One of the greatest matches of all time. I thought it was higher than that.
Wrestling Match Ratings and MJF Analysis
00:16:48
Speaker
Oh yeah. Five and three quarters. That's right.
00:16:50
Speaker
I assume he was in the building for it, right? He was, I think he was. San Francisco. San Francisco, so he would be there. And he probably got a great seat, courtesy of Tony Khan, since he's in the town.
00:17:07
Speaker
Does Dave Meltzer's star rating have anything to do with how good of a time he's having watching? Is it the circumstances? Did he have a really good sandwich at the time when he was watching Mox get stabbed? Does it have to do with his day more than it has to do with the match? I mean, I would think he would tell you that it doesn't, but it probably absolutely does.
00:17:33
Speaker
But then why does he give that a full star more than House of Black versus the elite? Right? Because that was, I think he gave that four and three quarters, or was it four and a half? Something like that. Four and three quarters, something like that. Yeah. Yeah.
00:17:49
Speaker
I don't know. Which to me seems a scotch high for that. Like four and three quarters seems a scotch high, but five and three quarters. And I liked the main event. Like I remember I'm surprised. I think MJF surprised me. I did not think MJF had him in him. It was pandally his best match of all time. But there was no if you told me, oh, one of these matches is going to break the five star scale. I think that would have been my third guess.
00:18:19
Speaker
You put this as MJF's best. So what is it, the Jungle Boy match?
00:18:24
Speaker
See, my mind goes to that, but that was also such like, it was a, it's hard to compare the two because that one was just a short TV match, if I remember correctly. It was a pay-per-view, but it was still the empty arena pay-per-view era. Yeah. Oh. I mean, a pretty good match with, I mean, the mox match was pretty good. He had a pretty good match with the punk dog collar match was pretty great. But yeah, I think this is definitely punk, MJF's best match.
00:18:51
Speaker
Definitely. What was the one where you started busting out the AJ PW moves? Um, it was just like a jobber match to not a jobber match, but like, uh, like a TV squash. Like you never remember was right when he came back. Yuda. Yeah. That match was really good. But I think that was like a surprisingly good TV match as opposed to this, which was a, what, like an hour and five minutes, give or take.
00:19:22
Speaker
I mean, it was one of the better Iron Man matches ever. I mean, in defense, I don't think there's been many super great Iron Man matches. Right. It might be the best Iron Man match ever, but also, I don't think highly of that many Iron Man matches. Do you think he's right in telling us that, like, you can shut the fuck up now? Like, I'm good at wrestling. You can stop questioning whether or not this match is going to be good because I'm in it.
00:19:51
Speaker
I don't know about that because, again, it was Bryan Danielson. I think he needs to have a match that good with powerhouse Hobbs for me to be like, oh, that mechanic MJF, he can carry other people to a match.
00:20:08
Speaker
But I think he showed that he's a main event guy, right? In that he told a great story in the match that he told, right? And it wasn't just Daniel. Like, Danielson, maybe you could make an argument, and I'm not saying I'm making that argument, that Danielson carried the match from a kind of physical and calling standpoint. But MJF told a really good story, and that's what you need. That's what you need in a main event match, even more than,
00:20:36
Speaker
intense physicality in my mind. It's a long day, right? That's the match at the end of a lot of wrestling. And you're like, why is this the last thing? And that match, I think really delivered like, yep, that was the last thing.
00:20:53
Speaker
I'm satisfied. I got my $50 worth. Yeah. I thought the pacing was really good. Like I watched it. I didn't watch it that night because I was just exhausted from the weekend and I watched it like the next day on the airplane back. I hadn't been spoiled, but I also hadn't had my feed blow up that Daniel said had won the title. So I was kind of assuming MJF won at that point, but, um,
00:21:16
Speaker
Yeah, I thought it moved really well. I thought it like the pacing was great. And I was like, Oh, okay. This didn't feel like an hour, which is one of the best things I think you can say about an Iron Man match. Let's go as an hour.
00:21:27
Speaker
It's not quite, again, not quite Omega and Okada where you're like, that was 30 seconds. How was it? 75 minutes. Yeah. Like I put it on. I'm not going to lie. And I'm watching it at home and the Islander game had started and it was a big like playoff implication game. And I put that on the other screen. So I had both screens going and I just paused the Islander game.
00:21:48
Speaker
Because I'm like, it's an Iron Man match. It's going to take like 40 minutes to get going. Like I got some time. I could watch two periods of hockey and they engage me in it. And I think it flew by. I did look just look it up. Dave gave four stars to what I have as my second best Iron Man match. Which is Rock and Triple H. That sounds loaded. The Rock and Triple H.
00:22:17
Speaker
That was SummerSlam, was it? Judgment Day. Judgment Day. I don't remember this. Oh. Might have to revisit. May 2000. 2000. I mean, I would have still been watching wrestling then, so I don't know why I don't remember it. Oh, I remember that one, yeah. A really good show, too. Although the one the month before, the April show is like one of the all-time classic wrestling shows. It's just like,
00:22:46
Speaker
wall-to-wall bangers Well, I know I'm a bigger fan of the Brett Sean match then than you are I don't think it's one of the greatest matches ever like the way some people do I don't think a lot of people but I definitely heard people say that that's when the but like the going to the zero zero thing is It's just it's it's
00:23:10
Speaker
almost impossible to rewatch that match in its entirety. Cause it's like, I know this is going to zero zero. I just want to get to the last five minutes of the main match and then overtime. I think my favorite is going to be pretty controversial, which is obviously Tony Depp and versus
00:23:29
Speaker
all two hours of it versus Jordan Oliver. Any match that allows me to watch Jordan Oliver for two hours uninterrupted, you got my money every time. Because if he's wrestling, that means he's not cutting a promo.
00:23:50
Speaker
Uh, was there, um, I don't know if there's anything else on that show. We're talking about the gun club or somehow still tag champions. That's mystifying Jericho lost, which was cool.
00:24:08
Speaker
I did enjoy that tag match. I think I'm the only person in this group that genuinely had a fine time. And I actually liked the Ricky Starks Jericho match. I actually thought that was a pretty fun match. Not a great opener, per se, like kind of an odd choice for an opener, but I actually really liked that match. And by the way, Jericho's now lost to Starks twice. He lost a fucking action in Dreddy. How much losing does the guy need to do until you fucks are happy?
00:24:37
Speaker
Well, I think he's about to leave for a Fauzi, right? Oh. Or is he about to win the six-man title in Ontario next week? Or tomorrow? Sorry. No. I mean, maybe. By the time listeners are hearing this, they might already be nodding along, like, oh yeah, he pimped Kenny Omega clean to win the tag titles in Ontario. It's not Ontario. It's the peg facts. Oh, sorry. Even more.
00:25:08
Speaker
And by the way, I think I know I called that all the way back to our last previous podcast series, Chris, where I said when they do their first show in Winnipeg, it's got to be Kenny and Jericho.
Upcoming Wrestling Events
00:25:20
Speaker
I was expecting it to be one on one. I was also expecting it would have happened by now. But I am glad that both of those guys are in the same match. It's clearly going to be the main event. And that match is going to be a fucking banger despite Jericho's involvement.
00:25:38
Speaker
I was just enjoying a, I was just enjoying a milkshake from the place. We, we always joked that, that we would go to brunch with the Briscoes and, uh, I just have a milkshake from that place. So still RIP J Brisco. I hope Mark, when his family went to the comfort land, it's delicious. If you're ever in Queens, I hope you, I hope when you were in Queens, Garrett getting COVID, you didn't go to comfort land and give everyone COVID.
00:26:04
Speaker
Oh no. I exclusively get my COVID at American cheeseburger folks. So another development that's happened over the last couple of weeks. Garrett, I'm on your side. Fuck the rock. I'm there. I heard that. I think you said it in the last episode. I am all the way there.
00:26:30
Speaker
What took you there? What got you? What got you on the Dwayne drain, off the Dwayne drain? It's the social media feed of just, he's always promoting products. He's always smiling and you know that they're dog shit. And I think that I didn't know about, you were telling me, I was reacting live a few weeks ago when you were telling you about no Hobson shot too. I think once that really hit my core, that hurt. That hurt a lot. And honestly,
00:27:00
Speaker
One of the things is we were all on Team Rock, right? When it was Vin D's on The Rock, but you know what?
The Rock's Film Career
00:27:06
Speaker
Vinny D's doing more Fast and Furious movies. If The Rock's not doing Hobbs and Shaw, I'm on Team Vinny D and you can't, you can't be on both sides. You really do have to make a choice and it'll never not bother me
00:27:22
Speaker
that I go to all these rock movies throughout my rock fandom and they are all shitty. And he finally makes one that not only do I enjoy, but it's one of the best movies I've ever seen in Hobbs and Shaw too. It had my two favorite guys fucking people up in my favorite universe.
00:27:44
Speaker
Yeah, it's incredible. And then The Rock doesn't want to do it anymore. What the fuck? Now, to be fair, I actually think The Rock's done more. I think I give The Rock's filmography a little bit more cred than you. I think he's done some some fine middle of the road movies. And I think he's done some really solid movies. But that's where it's like he's now at the height of his fame and he's definitely abusing his powers. He's not doing Hobbs and Shaw. He's doing just shitty superhero movie that of a superhero no one's even heard of.
00:28:11
Speaker
Right. And it's like, this isn't what the rock should be doing. Well, if the rock, okay, so I would say other than Hobbs and Shaw, my favorite rock movie is Southland Tales. Richard Kelly's movie. I fucking love that movie a lot. And I think that movie so much.
00:28:31
Speaker
What's really interesting about that movie is it's got the weirdest cast. It's like Mandy Moore, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, The Rock, Sherry O'Tary, Steve Stifler, Booger from the Revenge of the Nerds. And basically Richard Kelly wanted to make the most pretentious movie with the least pretentious cast to take to cons. And The Rock is in it. He's very funny.
00:29:00
Speaker
Basically, if The Rock wants to get me back on his side, make an A24 movie, make it seem like you give a shit about the thing you're making, put some effort into it, and maybe I'll be like, okay, he's not just trying to sell me Mountain Dew Lime Green or whatever the fuck we'll be on at that point. Electric Lime, we'll call it.
00:29:21
Speaker
I'm surprised that he's not, that he didn't find a way to be in the Von Erics movie, just as like, I don't know, Rocky Johnson spent a week in Texas. Maybe, we don't know yet. Well, but he'll only do that though, if he gets like 75% of the box office.
00:29:44
Speaker
Well, it is an A24 movie, so there could be some weird shit in there, and he actually could play God. Because Lord knows there's some trips to heaven in that film.
00:29:58
Speaker
So we got a packed agenda here. So I'm going to keep things moving. I'm going to do that. I'm going to be the one that keeps things moving for the first time ever. Because fresh off the presses, just hours before we took to record, it
Power Slap TV Show Cancellation
00:30:12
Speaker
happened. We got the news. Power Slap is not coming back.
00:30:18
Speaker
It was a one, it's going to be a one season wonder. TBS has accident. Well, one season on TBS, it'll now be shown on something called the Rumble app, which is apparently an anti-woke streaming service. It's like YouTube, but hates people. I don't know. Wait, God damn it. The Rumble app. Is this real? That's a real thing. Rumble is apparently a thing that exists. Well, like if you told me
00:30:46
Speaker
that an entity like something like the the whole idea of power slap wasn't woke and doesn't believe in vaccines like I believe you there but that being said like I also enjoy a good slap in the face so it's gonna well but I want to watch Dana White's face slaps I mean aren't don't you really want the guys from like in like Poland or something Garrett
00:31:08
Speaker
I mean, that's good too, but I don't know. I'm a, I'm a brand loyalist, a power slap. And I did see that they had another fight plus show recently, like within while I was sick. I haven't, I haven't watched it yet, but I mean, as long as they signed something that their pay-per-views have to come to me on fight plus, I don't care where they go the rest of the time.
00:31:37
Speaker
Cause as we discussed, you, we don't want to know the stories. We don't, we don't want to watch power slap anymore. We just want to play pro wrestling, not here for the stories. I'm here for the matches. See, I actually am here for the stories, but it's like a kid playing with their toys. I want to create my own story.
00:31:56
Speaker
Right? I wanna project what that story is. I don't want them to tell me because it's gonna be the same story. It's just less sad when I don't know for a fact it's true.
00:32:08
Speaker
Right. And frankly, you're going to tell it far more eloquently because you haven't recently been slapped in the head several times. Well, see, I think what you really want is on Fight Plus, there is a, they're basically in a wrestling ring in the mountain somewhere. I probably not far from the Buffalo Wild Wings, but then they're like, coming up next is little Jimmy versus uncle fucky.
00:32:33
Speaker
And then they come out and slap each other. I have the story in my head already. I know who wronged who. I know why we're slapping each
Hardway Heater's Wrestling Matches
00:32:42
Speaker
other. And I don't need to see them live in a house. I don't need to hear their problems through a real world style aside. You know, I'm good. Yeah, it's gonna really ruin it for you when we see Marty Skirrell on there. And you know exactly how we ended up on the fight card.
00:33:02
Speaker
But see, Marty's the only one not doing it for his kids. And all the other ones are just like, we're doing it for the kids. Marty's just like, I just wanted to be on a show in America. He's the only place to let me do it. He got on the show and was actually explicitly told, do not mention children. I used to know Cody.
00:33:32
Speaker
What a fucking putt. Yeah, let's take him. He's the putt of the week. Let's just go ahead and say it. Enjoy King when asshole. So this is a terrible transition because we're jumping from somebody. I love a good bad transition.
00:33:49
Speaker
Cause now we're going to jump from somebody who's part of the week to somebody I like right before we started. Cause I realized I haven't watched wrestling in a minute. I need to, I need to ingest a little wrestling before I come on here. So hard way heater had two matches over the weekend for ICW.
00:34:06
Speaker
The first one was the, um, the, the pit fighter and it was ultra violent vortex. So you didn't know who was going to fight you and ended up being hard way heater versus Akira. And the weapon used throughout the match was, uh, vinyl records. And where, and where can we find this?
00:34:29
Speaker
Where can I find this on independent wrestling.tv? There you go. This is one of the most recent things added to it. Uh, very first match of the show. Oh, so I don't have to fast forward. You don't even have to fast forward. You just get heater right away. And I really appreciated that Akira basically in the match, since they're mostly fighting with vinyl does kind of a Sean of the dead spot.
00:34:56
Speaker
where he starts looking at what the records are and based on who the artist is decides whether or not to throw it like a ninja star at an injured heater in the corner. Or keep it, which he does end up keeping some, which I think the game ended up being harder for him because they were clearly a stack of records picked up at Goodwill prior to the match. So it took him a while of going through people you've never heard of to get to say in Andy Williams.
00:35:24
Speaker
you know that he's like i'll keep this i'll keep charlie brown christmas uh but they were they were going back and forth with those what else what else did heater uh sorry did a kira feel willing to to keep what was what were the lines anything or any was there anything that you thought was good that he was like i'm throwing this and you're like a kira i can't believe you're burning
00:35:44
Speaker
He definitely was throwing, uh, he got rid of a gospel record, which, uh, I would have got. Did he pull any five-finger death punch?
00:35:57
Speaker
Unfortunately, I don't think they were putting Five Finger Death Punch or Brantley Gilbert over at the Goodwill. I'm trying to remember, Andy Williams was in there. Fuck, maybe there was a Hank Williams. Maybe there really was a Charlie Brown thing. He did keep West Side Story. I thought he did make good decisions with what he kept. And when he said something that I had also never heard of,
00:36:23
Speaker
You know, he smashed that. Does a record hurt to get smashed on you? That's something I collect vinyl, but I've never been hit with. I would think only moderately. Yeah, I wouldn't think so. I'm pretty sure I've been hit by vinyl. There's a lot of children in the 70s that were bigger than me that grew up in my house. I'm sure I got hit with some vinyl and I don't remember it. I remember most of the hard ones.
WWE Shareholder Letter
00:36:52
Speaker
They did have a door with different records positioned all over it that Akira took, not a German suplex, maybe a side suplex into a door in the corner covered in records. Heater poured nails all over the ground, which
00:37:10
Speaker
No one got them in their body, but it did add an element of danger that felt unnecessary. That doesn't make quite an escalation. Fax's older brother did do that, too. That was that's one of the ones that hurt. Yeah. And then you go to fire, right? He goes records, nails, fire and then actual firearms. I will say, I will say I remember the ones that hurt facts does sound like something one of the guys on power slap said.
00:37:43
Speaker
That's basically what growing up in the facts household was like. It was every day was power slap, only we were both the sad fighter and the kid, both in one. We took on both roles at the same time. Well, in power slap, if it really hurt, you shouldn't remember it.
00:38:02
Speaker
You sleep after that. One other spot from that I do need to mention is Akira put a cross face on Heater with a gusset plate in his hands. So he's pulling back on the gusset plate into Heater's head. The other one I watched was the next night and Heater took on Sean Campbell, which we talked about from the show I saw on the bar here. Another KOBK guy.
00:38:31
Speaker
Perfectly fine match, but there were a couple spots that just didn't go as planned. For whatever reason, it was like, ICW told Heater and Sean Campbell, you're not allowed to use any of the doors tonight. Here's some plywood. Or just like a piece of, so the wood is laid out. And you know, occasionally in a table spot or especially a door spot, it'll look awkward when somebody has to lay on it and try and balance.
00:38:59
Speaker
I would say the way Heater was laid out on this thing, he was pretty much laying in the same position that Kate Winslet was laying in Titanic as she was getting drawn. So he has like- I don't know what scene you're talking about. I've never paused that scene.
New Japan Cup Bracket Challenge
00:39:19
Speaker
My fifth grade penis absolutely remembers the way that hard way Heater was laying in that match.
00:39:25
Speaker
That's actually, weirdly, again, a scene that was reenacted in the power slap house. They cut that. It was between Wolverine and... I can't remember any of the other guy's names. I only remember the sadness. Man bun. Man bun. Man bun was painted by Wolverine. How about that? It seems reasonable.
00:39:49
Speaker
Ah, there was also a part in that match where Heater and Sean Campbell just, they both took bundles of light tubes and threw them at each other's heads at the same time. And they both hit each other with such a large thunk, neither broke, that was very entertaining. And then at one point Heater just grabbed that bundle and swung it at his buddy's midsection harder than I've ever seen anyone hit another man with a light tube. It actually was kind of fucked up.
00:40:17
Speaker
Either way, watch some hard way heater. We love the guy. And that actually sounded like a rigging endorsement. If it's the hardest you've ever seen, cause you've seen some light tubes and you calling something fucked up. I mean, those are, those are. Yeah. I mean, that sounds like an unambiguous recommendation. Yeah.
00:40:39
Speaker
Garrett's line on fucked up is pretty far at this point. Hey, you know what else is interesting? Just a fucked up thing is, uh, I don't know. I think we've talked about this on the, I am an investor in WWE. I don't watch the product. Uh, I'm management.
00:40:54
Speaker
I do. I finally got a letter in the mail informing me of Vince McMahon's restructuring of the board. And even though we've known all of the details about this for weeks, there's something just special about just actually getting a letter with the WWE logo on it explaining this fucked up nonsense.
00:41:20
Speaker
Who are you going to have sign that at WrestleCon next year when we all come to LA? Ah, Beastman. Also, whoever gets fired over the next year is basically, you're like, hey, I just wanted to have you sign this. Can you do a dramatic reading of it, Fax? Is it worth it? What do you think?
00:41:43
Speaker
Um, sure. I took a picture of it. So I have it, I think right here on my phone on this. He doesn't have the physical paper because he sent it off to a framing store too. I will. I wanted to frame it right next to that pair of Mandy Rose's panties I bought. Um, let's see here. Let me zoom it in.
00:42:10
Speaker
Yeah. I mean, I, Mr. I'm just going to go to the second paragraph, but it starts obviously dear world wrestling entertainment, Inc. Sharehold stockholder. And then ellipse. Mr. McMahon is the beneficial and record owner of not less than a majority of the aggregate voting power of all outstanding shares of capping stock of the company capital C.
00:42:40
Speaker
Uh, entitled to vote generally in an election of directors as of January. So I get, I invested a couple other companies, you get things like this, not infrequently. I've never gotten a letter in the mail informing me, Hey shareholder, just FYI, you have no say in this. You are fucked. Right.
00:43:08
Speaker
Did it mention anything about his mustache? Because that is also a recent development while we were away. Somebody said, have you... Wait, wait, wait, I'm sorry, can I... Let me get to one more, next paragraph. Because it uses a word I'm going to pause on with intent. The board is not soliciting your consent.
00:43:34
Speaker
or your proxies in connection with the actions and no consent or proxies are being requested from the stockholders. Well, if there's one thing we know, Vince McMahon has no interest in requesting its consent. And they are allegedly will not receive yours before they fuck you facts.
00:44:02
Speaker
I should point out everything we know there is alleged. We would know more. But again, all of these women have been paid millions of dollars in hush money. So we just we just can't know for sure. But I'm sure every all of the hush money dollars were paid for just completely innocent things.
00:44:20
Speaker
Yeah, we'll hold back our judgment until there's all the facts. And until then, we're gonna do our own research. So here's what I'm throwing, I'm just, listeners, connect the dots how you wish. We know Rick Flair, a very famous person got paid $300,000 to potentially be murdered on television. So if this is now millions that were paid out, I'm just saying, do the math.
00:44:47
Speaker
I'll throw in a couple bucks Rick's way.
GCW Show Anticipation
00:44:56
Speaker
So speaking of people having to do things that they may not be the most happy about, it's really looking bad for Garrett and facts in the New Japan cup racket right now. Fuck.
00:45:10
Speaker
So you told me that my pick for winner is out completely, right? Shingo lost in the first round to Aaron Honare. Now this, I will point out, so that was pretty bad for Gary. My winner lost in the first match. Uh-uh, Bax, that was the second match. My winner lost in the first match. Damn.
00:45:30
Speaker
First show, I had El Fantasmo. He lost to Naito. And that was as I like, well, you know, I'm going to lose to facts now because he's got Taichi going on a run. But at least I'll be happy because I love I love me some Taichi. And then he immediately lost to Sonata. So that we were basically destroyed within 40 minutes of the tournament starting.
00:45:51
Speaker
Okay, so there's five of us in the tournament right now, or five of us in the bracket challenge, correct? That's right. Who is in last place? Is it mere facts? Currently, it's facts. Yeah. And we said that the punishment can be up to five hours long. Four or five hours. Let's be reasonable here.
00:46:16
Speaker
I, okay, I think this is what I would do. I mean, whoever wins gets to decide, or is it all of us? No, I think the winner gets to decide. And I think that we had talked about, but you weren't on the show, on the episode that you were on, Garrett, we talked about if we finish below a listener, we should probably all have to do the punishment.
00:46:40
Speaker
Whether it's together and we do a thing about it, livestream it or not, we can talk through the details. But I do feel like it seems inevitable that we will be finishing bottom three in our own bracket pool.
00:46:56
Speaker
Well, to Matt and Lowell, I suggest not making us watch a whole show, but one thing for five hours. I really think that if we had to sit there and think about what we did as we watch Undertaker versus Goldberg in Saudi Arabia over and over again for five straight hours, that we'll never lose a new Japan bracket again. I think that we will,
00:47:23
Speaker
will become better, just more astute in the world of professional wrestling. We'll learn from our mistakes. We'll send Ghetto thousands of dollars to tell us the results. Ghetto, you just got to get us the final four and we'll work it out the rest from there.
00:47:44
Speaker
Uh, I think there's a, there's a, there's a chance right now, uh, as we speak, our leader is Matt and I don't think that's going to change. We were recording this on Tuesday nights. That's not going to change for the last second round matches. Um, I think there's maybe there's like one on ramp where.
00:48:03
Speaker
It was like one or two scenarios where maybe Matt could get passed. I think it involves David Finley getting to the final. So I don't know whether I should cheer for that or not, but I think if Finley gets to the finals, someone may be able to catch Matt.
00:48:18
Speaker
But it's Finley like, allegedly, we'll say allegedly, the new leader of Bullet Club. Sort of? Although the whole thing seems to be that they're like upset. They're like, do I want to follow this guy? Which is a great question. He went Vinny Mac on it. He didn't ask for consent of any of the members of the board of Bullet Club. He just was like, I'm doing it.
00:48:45
Speaker
Don't ask for forgiveness, don't ask for
Circle Six and Karaoke with Minoru Suzuki
00:48:47
Speaker
permission. Just take it and see what happens. Yeah, I mean, I personally, I mean, it's unfair, because I thought the match with Ishii was good, although, shit, what's it going to take to have a bad match with Ishii? So I don't know if that says a lot about David Finley. So we'll see how he does the rest of the tournament. But there's a really non-zero chance that he should be the one who leads House of Torture.
00:49:14
Speaker
him and Evil together just letting everyone know it's time to fast forward. Have there been any matches that are ones we should be checking out? The tournament's been good, although I'm not sure if there's really been anything where I'm like, you gotta see that when it was a banger. I don't know, actually. Phantasmo and... Phantasmo and...
00:49:43
Speaker
Whatchamacallit, Fantasmo and Naito is pretty good. We do have ZSJ and Shooter coming up, which is potentially pretty good. Osprey's still in it. But that's part of it. In these upsets here, I tend to pick who I want to see go forward. And the guys I really like are all out of the tournament, pretty much, other than ZSJ at this point, which may be changed by the time someone's hearing this.
00:50:16
Speaker
Yeah, what they say again, straight white guys never get what they want. It's unfortunate. Yeah. On all we really wanted was to watch Tai Chi wrestle more. That's true. And rip those pants off. They wouldn't allow that in Memphis. No, that again, that would definitely be drag. He definitely would not be getting a baby face pop for that. Yeah. I mean, have you seen Tai Chi's hair? I mean, that's, I think, definitionally at this point is drag.
00:50:49
Speaker
In Tennessee, at least, in Tennessee. The rules are confusing, but you know that already. And they're that way on purpose so that, you know, Tai Chi doesn't have to be here. It's easier to just not bring him because you don't want to end up with an international incident. You'll never get to see Tai Chi again. You guys are seeing GCW this weekend, huh? St. Patty's Day, Friday night, St. Patty's night.
00:51:19
Speaker
Will you remember GCW? Um, it's at the Melrose Ballroom, which is not, it's, it's, it's weird because it's not a great venue and it's not like, it's like not a great place for drinking, yet it's also not a great place for staying sober.
00:51:44
Speaker
It's tricky. I've been there and I don't know what you mean about... What do you mean? Usually, when you go over there for a wrestling show, there's 100 people up at the bar, but none of them are drinking. It's like you have to wrestle your way through to get to the bartender to then immediately get service for an inordinately expensive
00:52:12
Speaker
drink, which is going to be just like them opening a beer for you, $13, give me a tip. So it's just kind of, and then like the actual seating, and we have GA, because tickets sold for this, like big time. So we, like two weeks ago, we're like, oh shit, we better buy GA, like, because I'm not gonna lie, until they started announcing matches, I was a little on the fence, just because going into New York City,
00:52:41
Speaker
on St. Patty's Day is stupid. It is a stupid thing to do for stupid people. That's a very bad idea, yes. And so I was like, I don't know, even a GCW show, I don't think you can get me to Queens. But then they started kind of announcing stuff and it's like, oh shit, okay, I gotta do this. And so we're- You get to meet Axe Loco or you get to meet Gringo Loco. I mean, again, me and Gringo Loco, I mean, we're- Maybe the same guy. Right, see my mom's house, yeah.
00:53:14
Speaker
He'll tell you about vinyl, but I mean, here's the, here's the lineup. This is, this is enough to get me to a place surrounded by bars on St. Patrick's day. Uh, main event against Boosie against second gear crew, which is mance and, uh, Manders versus wasted youth. That's a solid opener type time splitters against Jordan, Oliver, and Mike Bailey.
00:53:40
Speaker
In Times Four, again, to be clear, it's Kushida and Alex Shelley against Jordan Oliver and Mike Bailey. Nick Gage, which is not just one of the most insane matches you've ever heard. Like every part of that match is implausible. In Queens for GCW on St. Patty's Day.
00:54:02
Speaker
Right. Your two favorite guys are now a tag team, facts. This is a big night. And against the fucking time splitters, like in GCW, this is nuts.
00:54:19
Speaker
The gauge defends the title against Masha Slamovich. Insane. It's just an insane thing to be happening. I love it. Los Massisos against Rina, Yamashita and Soyarek as a tag team. Unfortunately, but for some reason in New York where they can't blade. So I'm curious what they're going to do. I guess I guess they'll find ways.
00:54:39
Speaker
Is my impression. I mean, they've all had good, just regular hardcore matches. So,
Podcast Conclusion
00:54:44
Speaker
you know, I think it'll still be a fun one. You know, it's not illegal in New York in a wrestling match. Menstrual blood throwing that out there. Don't have to tip me for that. Ben Dito against gringo loco. Love it.
00:55:03
Speaker
homicide against Matt Cardona. Just dream... Wait, by the way, to go back to Gringo Loco versus Bandito, that's because as I detailed on the last episode, I did not go to Bandito's gym, and now he's taking his revenge out on Gringo Loco. It's just really unfair, Bandito. Because I didn't make the pilgrimage while I was in Mexico City. I wouldn't go that extra hour. He's going to be teabagging him and looking at you. Although, what if the seat's empty because I'm not there?
00:55:34
Speaker
You just convene, that's when you go to the bar. Not done yet, by the way. Blake Christian against Jack Cartwheel, which should be fun. AEW Superstar Jack Cartwheel. AEW Superstar. As was Starboy Charlie and his and his overalls. Everyone had a lot of fun with the overalls. Farmboy Charlie, I believe Jim Ross called him.
00:56:00
Speaker
Farm Boy Charlie. Joey Janela against the Grim Reefer for the extreme title. And Willie Mack against Tony Deppen. That is a stacked as fuck GCW show for what's gonna be a very weird and probably drunk crowd. Are you gonna drink before you go? Are you gonna go to that? I remember eating some pretty good tacos near the venue with Wheatis.
00:56:29
Speaker
Wait a minute. Again, tell us the story, Garrett. You sat down with weedus. You broke bread.
00:56:35
Speaker
It was me and, uh, Alex, queen of the ring, went to. Joey Janelle lost in New York. We ate at a taco place nearby before the show and neither of us knew what we just looked like. And we're at a table, you know, it's basically touching the table next to us and joking. And it was like, what if this is Weetus right here? Beginning of the show, we just plays to the intro for Nate Webb. And it w it ended up being them. We did not know at the time, but we were eating with Weetus.
00:57:07
Speaker
So you could have talked to Wetus and you missed the opportunity.
00:57:10
Speaker
I don't know what we would have had to say to each other, but that song is really great. And it was the most ideal way to see them live. I got to hear the song first thing. And then they got in a fight with MJF and I didn't have to see a full weed is concert. I just got to hear the song. And this is well before tick tock, my friends. Tick tock was not even a thing yet. So just hearing a good song from the 2000s movie loser.
00:57:42
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, I don't know if we'll have Wetus at the show, but I mean, Nate Webbs, I think Nate Webbs in Circle Six now. I don't really understand what's happening with the Circle Six and GCW record. Oh, maybe that too. He did. He came back. Oh, I remember coming back, but I didn't know he was like back, back. I thought it was kind of like a one shot deal. I didn't know he was like taking bookings.
00:58:05
Speaker
He's been having, I think you're right though, a lot of them seem to be at circle six, because I know I saw he had a match recently or coming up against AJ Gray, which circle six just did a whole run of shows. It seemed like all over the country and they were filming it for something, but it was shows that you weren't able to see in the moment.
00:58:30
Speaker
OK, but I know they had a live one the other day that did run on independent wrestling TV. So I assumed they were filming these to all release on Fight Plus or something. I have no idea what's going on with Circle Six, though. You guys sent this before the show. They are putting on an interesting thing. Mania weekend in Los Angeles. Mm hmm. You want to tell them, Garrett? Yeah, you could go for it.
00:58:59
Speaker
It sounds like it's enough to possibly sell Chris a flight to Los Angeles. Circle six presents Minoru Suzuki's karaoke. Now I saw the Instagram post. I did not click for detail. So I think I'm going to need to see some details, but I also might be willing to book a round trip flight hotel and missing opening weekend of the baseball season, which I already have tickets for.
00:59:30
Speaker
If this is what I figured in. So it will cost me two thousand and six dollars to go to this show. It's going to be worth it, though. Fax and I know Fax and I were on a karaoke team together at one point. These unicorn zombie apocalypse. Actually, no, well, there are two teams. There was the unicorn zombie apocalypse. And then we were on a team called My Bulge. Mainly to make the Jose now from My Bulge.
01:00:00
Speaker
is facts. Yeah. But we were and part of that, we were in a we were in a man band called one erection. And so really, the opportunity for facts and I as one erection to sing for menorrhizology feels worth singing or sing with menorrhizology with. Right. Because that's where it like, if that's a possibility. Right.
01:00:29
Speaker
If they say that's one of the meet and greet options is do a song with Minoru Suzuki, I will literally give them the password to my brokerage account and they can just take what they want. They have to take the WWE letter that says I have no voting rights, but they can also take any of the actual equity.
01:00:51
Speaker
So you have to look at Menorah Suzuki from across the room as you're singing. What song are you putting on? And are you both good singers or are you? What is menorah? I think I think we're not it's not that we're we're like a more song entertainers than singers. You know, we're we've got a little bit more that that that karaoke appreciation society vibe going.
01:01:21
Speaker
Um, although I don't think I would do Judas, although I certainly know the words. Yeah. We did a very sexy version of the Bon Jovi song always together. Yeah, that was pretty hot. It's hot. Yeah. And I bet I bet Suzuki loves some Bon Jovi. Yeah, well, I'm trying to think.
01:01:44
Speaker
Like I'm trying to think if there's a good song with like, like traveling wheelberries or something with like three singers so we can do it. So Suzuki's the third one. And like, we all have our, I want, I want to do total eclipse of the heart and Suzuki does the parts that are like turn around. That seems worth it to me is all I'm saying. If we can just.
01:02:14
Speaker
do that, and we'll sing Backsnile trade off on the Bonnie Tyler part. And Suzuki will just, Suzuki will hit the big, the big notes. Do you think you'd hit up any other wrestling while you're, any wrestling while you're there? Are you paying all this money? No, we would go straight home. Backsnile are very busy. Straight home. Wouldn't even go to in and out. Just straight home. Yeah.
01:02:41
Speaker
$6 to get into Knuckleheads, maybe get a drink. I would just get off the airplane with a briefcase, I'd fix my tie, and then I would just go to the venue, hand them the briefcase which is just filled with cash. It's theirs. Sing the song and then leave.
01:03:04
Speaker
Just straight back to the airport, just sleep on, wake up first, flight first thing in the morning. Does Suzuki have any matches, Mania Weekend? I mean, that would lead you to believe he does. I mean, maybe he's found out he can make more money doing this, you know? This just happened to be Mania Weekend. He has no idea.
01:03:35
Speaker
I'm looking, he hasn't even been announced for the, um, for the new Japan show yet. Does that lead us to believe that he's going to work with circle six and do a match over there? I guess. I don't know who it's circle six. He'd work, but well, I know, uh, Atticus lost the title over the weekend. I think I believe he lost it to, uh, wince. Yeah.
01:04:01
Speaker
in like a three layers of, um, three layers of cheese match. I don't, I don't know what the hell the match was. It was like hell or something. Yeah. Yeah. By the way, I have the song we're going to do.
01:04:16
Speaker
So we all know the Brian Adams songs, everything I do, I do it for you for the Robin Hood soundtrack, right? It was a big song. It's still probably Brian Adams' biggest song. So they tried to replicate the success of that with the Three Musketeers song. It was Brian Adams. Yes. It was- Rod Stewart. And Rod Stewart, and it's all for love. And I don't know, I'm doing Rod Stewart. That's clear. I don't know, who's Suzuki and who's you?
01:04:45
Speaker
I think I want Brian Adams there. And I think of course Suzuki is Sting. That does make sense. And now this would be surfer Sting, not crow Sting. Right. Yeah. So once I thought Rod Stewart was really mean to me, and it ended up not being him,
01:05:11
Speaker
So while I was at Warner Brothers as a tour guide, I had dropped my guests off at the museum to go poke around. And while I was there, a man comes up and was like, hey, you need to give us a ride right now. And I'm like, I am working. I am not going to give you. And I look over and I'm like, I thought it was Rod Stewart. And it wasn't. And eventually someone else came over and said, I'll do it. And I was like,
01:05:36
Speaker
There was some other shit they said, this guy seems like a fucking prick. When they got back, I was like, so what did Rod Stewart do? He goes, oh, it turns out it wasn't Rod Stewart, because when I dropped them off, the man turned and said, Mr. Manilow, thanks you.
01:05:53
Speaker
It was Barry Manilow instead. Are we sure that that's not just the name Rod Stewart uses at hotel check-ins so people don't call us room? I'm really envisioning us and Suzuki crushing this facts. Yeah. I think what we need to do is
01:06:18
Speaker
We need to pay to fly him in to New York City so we can go to our old karaoke bar, K-17, which, does it still exist? I'm assuming it does. I think so, maybe.
01:06:35
Speaker
I don't know how it survives without us since we basically were the only ones there and we were there constantly for years. But anyway, we go there with Suzuki to rehearse so then that all of us can then fly to LA. Right. Exactly. Exactly. Because we got to work on the moves. You know, we got to figure out because you're a big part of it. Because you can tell there's a twinkle in Suzuki's eye when he hits that right note and he looks the ladies. I think the crowd's just going to explode. You know, we're here for support obviously.
01:07:05
Speaker
And the smoldering intensity is gonna land better when we show his soft underbelly during the moves for a bit. Yeah, I'm into it. Yeah, we gotta get hat-
01:07:18
Speaker
That's actually what exactly what I was going to say. I was going to say Suzuki's a hundred percent going to have a fedora. He loves fedora. And do you think if, if you guys show up with fedoras, he's like, no, we aren't fedora boys. I'm fedora man. You take your fedoras off. Yeah. No, I think we each need to get dip. We need to get different hats. Like Suzuki has his fedora. Maybe I have a cow, a cowboy hat.
01:07:39
Speaker
I think facts is going Scotty too hotty like with the goggles. Nope, guys. See, you guys are just going for random storylines. You're not thinking about what the song is. It's all for love. What is the biggest romance story in all of wrestling?
01:07:56
Speaker
It's Jon Moxley and violence. So it's going to be one of us playing up as Moxley. One of us obviously needs to wear a mask and be Despy. I would assume Suzuki can help us get some gear that's pretty convincing if we throw an extra coin his way. We reenact the Moxley match with Despy kind of in a Romeo and Juliet thing.
01:08:22
Speaker
Suzuki in an interesting just will play the ref and then we will chase him around until he comes back and reveals, no, you know, he is menorah Suzuki. And, you know, that's the big finale. And that's actually how we win win the competition, which no one knew is happening. But we bring Renee Renee Paquette to tears in the back. She's just watching this.
01:08:48
Speaker
is how beautifully everything has been represented. And she's like, you guys, you win. You've done it. And to be clear, what we win is a Tony Award. Right. Which are given out by Tony Khan, not annually. He gives them out every three months.
01:09:19
Speaker
I like this. I'll play Despy. The blood will have to be fake facts. I don't think the fight commission has anything. Oh, this is, yeah, this is Los Angeles. Does it have to be fake? No, no. I don't want you to blade me facts. You're clearly playing Mox here.
01:09:39
Speaker
Well, in the words of Mox, don't be a pussy. Either that, either that, or I think Mox is there for blood sport. Can we just get Mox in desperate to reenact the match with us on stage? Even more than that, I was going to say it's Mox. We don't invite him up. Renee's not there. We just finish. And then Mox is just convulsing on the floor because he thinks he's having a flashback.
01:10:09
Speaker
And this is all while you guys are singing a song from the Disney Three Musketeers movie. From 1993, that's right. That's correct. Yeah. Key for Sutherland. I want to say Chris O'Donnell. Chris O'Donnell, Charlie Sheen. There you go. Oliver Platt. All for one. All for love.
01:10:35
Speaker
Well, I don't think that I will be joining you but I will dress as D'Artagnan and stay at home I don't I don't think we beat the Tony Awards. I think that I Think this is where it ends It's sad that it had to be but we got to save some for next time
01:10:54
Speaker
Yeah, by next week, I think by the time we record next week, we may know whether we'll be being punished for our poor New Japan Cup performance. And we'll probably have some stories about St. Patrick's Day at a GCW show. Why are we doing this, Max? Yeah, I might not be able to. Well, we'll talk about it. I'm on the West Coast again next week. Might not be able to record, but I will send a correspondent.
01:11:19
Speaker
Matt, be thinking about the punishment and take it what I said into consideration. Because if five hours is the max, that doesn't mean that we don't have to watch one thing on a five hour loop. I think this is a punishment. And I think now any Kiefer Sutherland movie now classifies as wrestling adjacent after today's episode. The pilot of 24, five times.
01:11:46
Speaker
Shit. All right, everybody. For the song, the song, the Casa Nina Ray, just on a loop for five hours straight. That's just a good Saturday night. You throw that on a five hour loop while we watch that Undertaker Goldberg match. That is a night you'll never forget.
01:12:07
Speaker
Great review, subscribe everybody. Give us a follow at pre-determined podcast on Instagram. I'm at Gartet, at Chris Miggs, at Jimmy Lloyd's IMDB page. Does that exist yet? That's the name of my IG, but I haven't actually been on IG since the last episode. So I know, no. Get that going. All right. We'll have so much to talk about next week. Let's see if they survive St. Patrick's day. And one for all.
01:12:37
Speaker
and all for love. Rod Stewart hit our goddamn music.