In this episode of The Ugly Podcast, I speak with Dani Abernathy (she/they), an Enneagram teacher and Author Accelerator book coach, and we reflect on how our creativity got lost in the shuffle of adulthood, stifled by self-judgment and the pressures of fitting into religious norms. We discuss how stepping away from religion and being honest about who we really are—especially when it comes to gender and sexuality—opened up space to create without fear or the need to prove anything. We talk about how isolating it can be to hide parts of yourself and how freeing it feels to just be real, even if that means embracing the darker or more complicated parts. Exploring and expressing our true identities has made life—and creativity—feel a lot more authentic and fun.

This episode also showcases the first ever live ugly art exercise! Don't know how we got this far without one, but so glad we're here!

Learn more about Dani at daniabernathy.com [https://www.daniabernathy.com/]and take their Untapped Superpower Quiz [https://www.daniabernathy.com/quiz] to discover your writing superpower and receive tools to help you on your writing journey. Follow them on Instagram: @daniabernathyauthor [https://www.instagram.com/daniabernathyauthor/]

Let's Bring the Darkness w/ Dani Abernathy

In today's episode, I talk with Sarah Henn Hayward about her experience writing Giving Up God, a memoir about leaving religion. We talk about how she didn't feel very creative before writing her memoir, but the process of writing it awoke her creativity and led her to continue writing children's books and fiction.

Long story short, if you say yes to your ideas and get started, you might find that you have way more up in your brain than you ever thought possible!

Check out Sarah's website to learn more about her work! https://sarahhennhayward.com/

References
FFTs: Fucking First Time by Brené Brown [https://brenebrown.com/podcast/brene-on-ffts/]

It Started Out with a Memoir w/ Sarah Henn Hayward

Heather Buchanan is back! In this episode, we talk about Heather's new book, Blame the Stars [https://bookshop.org/p/books/blame-the-stars-a-very-good-totally-accurate-collection-of-astrological-advice-heather-buchanan/20598813?ean=9781797226392], based on her totally accurate and divinely channeled IG page Horror Scoops [https://www.instagram.com/horror.scoops/], and the intense process she went through to bring this incredibly goofy book to her readers. We discuss working with the inner critic and being willing to draw the goofy things that pop into your brain--like beans!--and saying yes even when your inner critic is telling you no.

You can buy Heather's book anywhere books are sold, and we highly recommend going to your local bookstore! Follow along for weekly horror scoops on IG @horror.scoops and check out more of Heather's work at heatherbuchanan.ca [https://www.heatherbuchanan.ca/]

References:
Manhunt [https://bookshop.org/p/books/manhunt-gretchen-felker-martin/17086522?ean=9781250794642]by Gretchen Felker-Martin
Tara Brach RAIN method
The Artist's Way [https://bookshop.org/p/books/the-artist-s-way-30th-anniversary-edition-julia-cameron/6665657?ean=9780143129257] by Julia Cameron


Draw the Dang Beans w/ Heather Buchanan

In this episode, I'm joined by Kaighla Rises, Pushcart Prize Nominee and award-winning author of Evryn, The Light [https://bookshop.org/p/books/evryn-the-light-kaighla-rises/19964668?ean=9798218167462], to talk about returning home to ourselves through creativity. 

There is no one path to healing, but connecting with creativity, getting help for mental health, listening to our inner child, and leaving harmful religious structures and relationships have all brought Kaighla and I closer to ourselves. Get to know Kaighla's work at kaighlarises.com

References:
The Artist's Way [https://bookshop.org/p/books/the-artist-s-way-30th-anniversary-edition-julia-cameron/6665657?ean=9780143129257] by Julia Cameron
Things That Shatter [https://www.amazon.com/Things-That-Shatter-Kaighla-Dayo/dp/1796406333] by Kaighla Rises
Wellspring [https://www.amazon.com/wellspring-kaighla-rises-ebook/dp/B091V6GMHT/ref=sr_1_4?dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.UNhojSwSPpMahRqBcNJnzLbZQL3MtuyK0vwJMhUZh043Ly15VvCIfArfCM5oaGhn.1JJ3URfkL-YWR2rWFCXMzpALs8cn2C_SG5IwgCdAM7Y&dib_tag=se&qid=1710860072&refinements=p_27%3AKaighla+Rises&s=digital-text&sr=1-4&text=Kaighla+Rises]by Kaighla Rises
Emotionally Healthy Spirituality [https://bookshop.org/p/books/emotionally-healthy-spirituality-it-s-impossible-to-be-spiritually-mature-while-remaining-emotionally-immature-peter-scazzero/9985431?ean=9780310348498] by Peter Scazzero

[Image description: Photo of a woman in her mid-thirties with short pink hair, green eyes, wearing a Palestinian keffiyeh scarf around her neck against a black background. She's smiling warmly and looking directly into the camera.]

Returning to Self w/ Kaighla Rises

My guest this week is Toni Nagy, stand-up comedian, content creator and interpretative dancer extraordinaire. Toni shares her unexpected path to accepting the “ugly” in her life and how this led her to embrace her own style of dancing, the importance of finding that deeper motivation to be creative, and embracing cringey feelings as fertile ground for transformation. We also chat about one of my favorite topics–art as a tool for liberation! Specifically, strengthening our imaginations and deepening the connection we have with ourselves, the earth, and each other.

This episode marks the first installment of a new segment, listener questions! Today’s question focuses on how to show up when making anything feels overwhelming. If you have a question you'd like to hear on the podcast, email me at lauren@scribeandsunshine.com. 

For more laughs and existential dance-musings, follow Toni on Instagram @toninagy [https://www.instagram.com/toninagy/]and check out her link tree [https://linktr.ee/toninagy] for shows, her Patreon, and more goodies!

References:
The book I forgot the name of: Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control by Katherine Morgan Schafler [https://www.perfectionistsguide.com/]

Creative Liberation w/ Toni Nagy

Today’s guest, April Fitzpatrick (she/her), aka “The Pineapple Lady,” is an art therapist whose work centers art as a process that allows people, particularly those who’ve experienced racial trauma, to reclaim agency over their personal narratives.

April and I talk about the impressive symbolism of the pineapple for both the therapy process and the human development process, and a broad overview of what happens from a neuroscience perspective when we engage in creative acts. We also discuss the benefits of prioritizing the healing and creative processes rather than chasing after unrealistic performance culture standards.

In the midst of so much global grief and ongoing trauma, one thing I know for sure is the importance of having an inclusive mental health framework to help us all work toward healing.

You can learn more about April's work at pineappleswithpurpose.com [https://www.pineappleswithpurpose.com/meet-april] or on Instagram at @pineappleswithpurpose [https://www.instagram.com/pineappleswithpurpose/]. You can see some of her work featured in Tallahassee Democrat, Tallahassee International Airport, Canvas Rebel, Artful Infrastructure, Black Superwoman Chronicles, ArtPlace America, Black Minds Mag, Art Seen: The Curator’s Salon Magazine, and ART4EQUALITY x LIFE, LIBERTY, PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS Exhibition Catalog. 

Pineapples & Process w/ April Fitzpatrick

In this episode, I talk with fellow editor and book coach, Sabrina Estudillo Butler, about standing in our values and saying the quiet part loud. We discuss how it feels in our bodies when we step out of our comfort zones and speak up about injustice and the inner criticism that inevitably pops up when we are new or feel like an imposter. We touch on the issues in publishing as a white, cis, straight, able-body-centered industry, and why it’s so important to speak about these topics to effectuate change.

Whenever we dare to say something important and lean into our values, I firmly believe we make the world a little better. And it’s scary to do that! Which is why I wanted to have this conversation with Sabrina to talk about doing the scary thing anyway and how it feels in the moment, amid the transformation.

You can learn more about Sabrina’s work on her website unpolishedwords.com [https://www.unpolishedwords.com/] and follow her on social media for more: @unpolishedwords [https://www.instagram.com/unpolished.words/] on Instagram and Sabrina Estudillo Butler [https://www.linkedin.com/in/sabrinaestudillobutler/] on LinkedIn.

References:
Juno Creative [https://junocreative.studio/]
PEN America Report: Reading Between the Lines [https://pen.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/01/Reading-Between-the-Lines.pdf]
Open Letter Criticising PEN America’s Stance on Israel-Gaza War Reaches 500 Signatures [https://www.theguardian.com/books/2024/feb/12/open-letter-criticising-pen-americas-stance-on-israel-gaza-war-reaches-500-signatories]

Saying the Quiet Part Loud w/ Sabrina Estudillo Butler

Today’s episode is all about the importance of queering up the creativity process and I am lucky enough to be joined by M Eifler (they/them), a San Francisco-based artist who uses art and technology to explore disability as a hotbed of innovation.

M and I talk about the way their disability has helped them evolve their creative approaches, including their #ArtSchoolFromBed series, the importance of starting where their body is rather than a level of skill, and how their disability actually means they do not have the energy for perfectionism. M also shared how they use a scientific-method-type approach to creativity as a way to invite and welcome the messy and ugly (!) results.

You can find M’s work on their website blinkpopshift.com [https://www.blinkpopshift.com/] and you can support them on their Patreon [https://www.patreon.com/BlinkPopShift]and possibly host of their incredible pieces by becoming a patron.

References:
Art 21 [https://art21.org/series/art-in-the-twenty-first-century/]
Activist affordances  [https://bookshop.org/p/books/activist-affordances-how-disabled-people-improvise-more-habitable-worlds-arseli-dokumaci/18380531?ean=9781478019244]
Ugly Laws [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ugly_law]

Disability & Innovation w/ M Eifler

In this episode, I chat with Switzerland-based writer and fellow healing perfectionist Jo Bahdo about their recent season of writing project, defining what perfection even is, taking steps to heal distrust in ourselves after we haven’t shown up consistently for our craft, and the value in having a “no such thing as mistakes” mindset when it comes to practicing our art.

Jo Bahdo (they/them) is a writer, an avid reader, and a regular cinemagoer and is currently co-directing the Swiss Youth Film Festival in Zurich. They have published two poetry collections and also have two newsletters, one about their current projects and one for writers and creators, all of which you can check out on their website [https://www.jobahdo.com/]! You can also find Jo on Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/jobahdo/].

References:
Art Attack  [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Art_Attack]
1000 Words of Summer [https://www.jamiattenberg.com/1000words]

No Mistakes w/ Jo Bahdo

The Ugly Podcast is back from hiatus, and I couldn’t think of a better person for this episode than Emerson Lee, my creative partner and former co-host. Emerson and I both share big life events we’re currently grieving, how making art and having an expansive mindset is helping us process our grief, how weird time is, and the joy in allowing ourselves to explore what we want in this moment, no matter how messy or nonsensical it seems.

We also touch on the book Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals by Oliver Burkeman which reminds us how insanely short our time here on earth is. My conversation with Emerson was an important reminder to prioritize figuring out what brings you joy.

If you haven’t already, go follow Emerson on Instagram @letsmakemoment [https://www.instagram.com/letsmakemoments/] for education around disability justice, dementia, and living fully.

References:
Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals by Oliver Burkeman [https://bookshop.org/p/books/four-thousand-weeks-time-management-for-mortals-oliver-burkeman/18140090?ean=9781250849359]
Welcome to Night Vale [https://www.welcometonightvale.com/]
Hi Jinkx! with Jinkx Monsoon [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/hi-jinkx-with-jinkx-monsoon/id1565264483]
Untamed by Glennon Doyle [https://bookshop.org/p/books/untamed-glennon-doyle/9568109?ean=9781984801258]
“We Can Do Hard Things” by Trish Melton [https://open.spotify.com/track/2GhZ6OFTzasUwOrI32zS4P?si=454f090007824c25]

Grief, Time, and All the Things w/ Emerson Lee

Lauren talks with creatives and industry professionals about the creative process and how to live more openly and fully through the willingness to make "ugly" things—including this podcast! Lauren aims to let creatives know they're not alone and they deserve to explore all facets and forms of creativity, not just what is accepted as "good art." 

Lauren (they/them) is an editor, creativity coach, and the founder of Scribe & Sunshine. You can find more about what they do at https://scribeandsunshine.com/ and if you want to support them, you can do so at https://ko-fi.com/scribesunshine.