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Healthy Friendships After Trauma — Trust, Boundaries & Healing Relationships - Part 1 | Trafficking Free America Podcast
67 Plays26 days ago
In Part 1 of a two-episode conversation, survivor-leader Oree Freeman sits down with her close friend Irony Senegal for an honest, healing discussion about friendship, trust, and healthy relationships after trauma.
This episode explores what it looks like to build deep, life-giving friendships without centering trauma, labels, or past pain. Oree and Irony reflect on how their relationship began, how trust is built slowly and safely, and why boundaries, patience, and consistency matter more than titles or expertise.
Rather than approaching friendship through a “trauma-informed” lens alone, this conversation highlights something simpler—and often overlooked: what healthy love actually looks like. From accountability and communication to slowing down and protecting one another’s hearts, this episode offers a powerful model for friendships rooted in faith, respect, and mutual growth.
👉 This is Part 1 of a 2-part interview.
🎧 Part 2 will be released next week, continuing the conversation around friendship, boundaries, and healing community.
This episode continues the mission of Trafficking Free America: equipping individuals, survivors, and communities to pursue healthy connection, restoration, and Christ-centered relationships.
🕒 Episode Timestamps
0:00 – Opening reflections: balance, grace & overthinking
0:41 – Introducing Irony Senegal
1:14 – Why friendship matters in healing and prevention
2:16 – How Oree and Irony first met at church
3:16 – Setting boundaries early in relationships
4:21 – Respect, accountability & spiritual growth
5:07 – Seeing the person, not the trauma
6:37 – Discipline, faith & consistency in friendship
7:42 – Trust built through shared values
8:52 – Protecting hearts and safe community
11:24 – Loving someone without defining them by pain
13:21 – Friendship as mutual growth and balance
14:57 – Why healthy relationships don’t need labels
32:30 – Closing & reminder: Part 2 drops next week
#TraffickingFreeAmerica #HealthyFriendships #HealingAfterTrauma #SurvivorVoices #FaithAndHealing #BoundariesMatter #HealthyRelationships #CommunityCare #Restoration #PartOne #PodcastSeries #HopeAndHealing
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Transcript
Balancing Acts in Relationships
00:00:00
Speaker
it's It's okay. It's just on the surface. You know, everything is, you you overthinking right now or nobody looking at you like that. Nobody worrying about that. You know, you being way hard on yourself right now. Girl, we all going through that. Yeah, to pull you back too, because you are very hard on yourself. So I feel like it's a balancing act.
00:00:15
Speaker
But that's what a healthy relationship is. It's a balancing act.
Introduction to Trafficking Free America Podcast
00:00:25
Speaker
Hey everyone, welcome to the Trafficking Free America podcast where I am your host Ori Freeman and today we have a very, very special guest, none other, my girl, my bestie, um Irony Senegal.
00:00:42
Speaker
Hello everyone, so happy to be here and I'm looking forward to this conversation. I'm excited to have you on here. um One of the things I, why I asked you to join the podcast was because, you know, we are a human trafficking, and anti-human trafficking organization. And we do a lot of not only awareness, intervention, and different services that we provide directly to survivors, but we're really big on education and really equipping people with the tools. And so I brought you on here because,
00:01:16
Speaker
I really want our audience, um not just our typical audience, but our audience for women or individuals who have been exploited um to talk about friendships, navigating friendships, um navigating a healthy friendship and what that looks like, being open to transparency. And so how about you share how we met and then I share my perspective on how we met because it's always two sides to a story, of course.
Meeting at Church and Spiritual Growth
00:01:52
Speaker
Yes, I'd love to share. Yeah, I think it'll be cool to compare. Okay. So um I'm at Ori at church um and they had this program that was called spiritual growth. And it I was like, man, that's something I want to sign up for. That sounds like.
00:02:11
Speaker
A great way to just get acclimated, you know, being ah becoming a new church member. And I thought maybe it also could be a really nice way to meet people, you know, organically meet people that you're on the same path and you're pursuing the same things with. So we had ah a brief or a mini or like orientation um before we made the commitment and Ori was there.
00:02:35
Speaker
And she definitely stood out. So it was maybe like a a group of what, like six, seven of us in the circle. And the facilitator was like, hey, I just want to be able to educate you guys on what this commitment really looks like to see if it's a good fit for you.
00:02:52
Speaker
And Ori was like, I got a question. And I'm like, okay. And then as soon as she started talking, she had a little swag. So I'm like, where is this girl from? She's like, I'm from l la and you know, we we in the South, we're little country. We sound a little different. She was fast talking and just had this spunk to her.
00:03:10
Speaker
And um I'll never forget. Your first question was like, listen, I'm not here to waste my time. Are we really serious about pursuing Jesus? Are we are we really going to be growing and holding each other accountable? Because, you know, it's just me and my daughter out here.
00:03:24
Speaker
And um I'm very protective of the people I have in my life. And and I just want to make sure that this is something that's going be worth investing into. And i just, you are a complete stranger, but I just grew a tremendous amount of respect for you in that moment because immediately it was a boundary that was set.
00:03:44
Speaker
Because a lot of people, we think about those questions, but we don't ask because we're afraid of how we're going to be perceived. But um it was appreciated because I felt the same exact way.
00:03:56
Speaker
And then from then on, we started doing spiritual growth together. And we still wasn't like sitting by each other or just talking immediately. But as we were sharing points in the conversation, we noticed that we had a lot in common. And we were really serious about our walk with God.
00:04:13
Speaker
and and getting closer to Christ. And ah after one day after class, she was like, I'm to sit by you. I said, well, come on in. Well, come on. We're about to go to church. Sit by me then. And then we sat together and we was like, you know, tell me a little bit more about you. And it was just a really pleasant exchange. And my mother was there.
00:04:35
Speaker
And then you were like, so what y'all doing after this? i was like, we're going to eat. She's like, I like to eat. Can I come? I was like, yeah, girl, come on. So, and then ever since then, we've just been kicking it in.
00:04:46
Speaker
And honestly, it's just, it's just been, you have been a tremendous blessing in my life. And I can for sure say hands down that you, your friendship, you come from God. And because I met you as I was pursuing God. So that's just, I feel like that's really what makes our friendship really unique, you know, but that's, that's my side.
00:05:06
Speaker
yeah at You know, it's so crazy because hearing you, share where I was and where I can be at one point because outside of my work, you know, I do this whole anger thing about being anchored in Christ.
00:05:24
Speaker
And I'm not always like that. And so to hear how you see me at a point where I didn't see myself like that, you know, having a boundary, being serious about the Lord
Bonding Over Faith and Styles
00:05:36
Speaker
and I was, but I didn't know how somebody else could see me, you know, because I always struggle with seeing myself and giving myself some time to pat on the back. Cause I, I'm my biggest critic.
00:05:47
Speaker
Um, but I remember, that when we met in particular, I'll never forget the day. Now, mind you, y'all, irony is is sharp. When I say sharp, honey, like baby dresses down. Okay. Like she don't leave the house without being 100%. And I'll tell you when I, I'll give you a little bit more context to that because people could typically be like, well, you don't always feel like that, but she's like, no, you don't never leave the house like that. Like you always show up for yourself.
00:06:21
Speaker
At 100%. And so that's a lesson. And we'll talk about a little bit about more of those lessons that these huge lessons that she's taught me within our friendship, but she would come up in there sharp. I mean, honey would be dressed to the T baby. Okay. And she would come in there and she was just prepared, you know, even though I was serious about the Lord, I mean,
00:06:46
Speaker
Irony would have all of her homework done. I probably did about two scriptures. She did the whole page, the whole three pages. Okay. And, you know, I would still have my excuses. would say, well, I had to do this. had to do that. But I did do something.
00:07:01
Speaker
And that's, yeah, that was me. And so I've seen her dedication, her discipline. It was your discipline that was just like, it caught my eye. And then I'll never forget the day we were talking about Books.
00:07:17
Speaker
And it wasn't like the large topic. Everybody else was talking about books. We were talking about current things we were reading. And I was reading a book by John Bevere called The All of God. And you were reading it, too. And it is a serious book because it's about the fear of the Lord.
00:07:35
Speaker
And so I'm like, oh, she reading that. oh Oh, she a heavy hitter. Like she she's serious about God, like the obedience of God, you know, and that's not a typical book. Most people don't want to read because it's not just in your face. It brings a lot of conviction, but the serious seriousness and the holiness of the Lord. And so I'll just never forget when I heard you say that, you know, it's only been a couple of times in my life where I've looked at somebody and was like,
00:08:01
Speaker
Whatever it is that they have got, I want it. And not like in this, oh, I want that. It was inspiring. Like, okay, I need to know who she is.
00:08:13
Speaker
You know, I want to be her friend. Not necessarily you think that, but you're like, I want to be, i want it. And I remember another relationship was like that was with Leah. When I first met her, like not even saved yet.
00:08:25
Speaker
And I was like, what is that light about her? And you had a light about you too. And I just was like, okay, Lord, like, I like her. Like, I want to
Serendipitous Connection and Friendship Growth
00:08:33
Speaker
be her friend. And it was super natural.
00:08:36
Speaker
It was super. And then I'll never forget when we went out to eat. Your mother, from the first conversation, it was the first time I experienced somebody being protective over my heart and over me.
00:08:52
Speaker
And I don't know if you remember that conversation. She was like, but you don't let every... We were talking about friendships and i could just feel her sincerity about... No, you don't do that. You don't allow people to do that to you. You don't deserve that. Like I felt it in my core.
00:09:09
Speaker
um And from the jump, you you both have just been sincere and authentic. And then the crazy part of us, which you all don't know, is that. A couple years ago, probably about, what, six years ago, seven years ago, because Evelyn wasn't born yet.
00:09:26
Speaker
I got called to Texas to speak at a federal at ah at a federal institution. And that was through a friend. And, you know, that friend I'm still connected with from out here. um And it just was a God thing.
00:09:40
Speaker
Well, Mama, you're her mother, just call her Mama Faith, she's in the class she's like, I remember you. I know you. know i' like and I know you. And I'm like, you don't know me.
00:09:52
Speaker
I'm not from Texas. they You don't know me. I'm not from Texas. She was like, no, I know you. And she said, she gave her job's name. And I was like, yes, I spoke there. And she was like, that's you. And it's crazy because when I went back in the email recently, remember Irony? Yeah, did. You came across the email that she sent you.
00:10:14
Speaker
One of y'all didn't respond, but yeah I think she sent you like, man, you did a great job or or something. yeahp She emailed me and said, hey, you did a great job. She wanted to connect, you know, outside of that.
00:10:27
Speaker
And I followed up with her. Mama didn't follow back up with me. but But it's okay because... That's mama's heart though. Like that's, um, miss faith's heart and it has always been.
00:10:40
Speaker
And so just to think how God brought back an experience to now a relationship and a friendship, um And that was the core. That was the start of our friendship. But I think what's really what has been life changing for me is the way you have loved me and the way that you have shown up for me. And I will i want you to share with the audience.
00:11:04
Speaker
Okay. um I don't know if you remember the time, but you know what? What is it
Patience, Understanding, and Learning from Each Other
00:11:13
Speaker
like? Being a friend to somebody who's experienced all that I have experienced, all the trauma and everything, what is it like for you?
00:11:24
Speaker
What is it like for me? um I don't feel like that's a challenging question because we speak from where we are. But from the get-go, I made the decision when we first met to just to get to know you and your heart.
00:11:42
Speaker
and not to allow your trauma or your past pain define you. um So for me, i would say it requires patience and understanding, but what relationship, what friendship doesn't, you know? um We talk about all the time.
00:12:04
Speaker
I feel that because I have so little trauma. um I forget that you have trauma, honestly. You know, so I feel that God definitely had a role with, okay, I want to put somebody in her life that just sees Ori and not sees her story all the time.
00:12:26
Speaker
Someone that just sees Ori, not the story, just you and your love and where you currently are. And not what you used to do or who you used to be, but just who are you becoming and being a part of that journey.
00:12:39
Speaker
Because, you know, i feel like sometimes it could be, it could become a hindrance or discouragement to have someone around you that's always reminding you of something that you're trying to grow from or maybe a hurtful experience that you're trying to heal from. So I feel like our friendship is very healing.
00:12:59
Speaker
It's very healing for me. It's very inspiring for me. you The way that you show up unapologetically yourself you know just encourages me to do the same thing. I tell you all the time, you you are the type of woman that you make other women feel comfortable being themselves and not having to apologize for it.
00:13:21
Speaker
So... um Yeah, I mean, honestly, I wouldn't say that being your best friend requires any anything that a healthy relationship doesn't require. It it requires time.
00:13:37
Speaker
you know Invest in time, being present, um being able to put yourself in someone else's shoes, you know leading with a heart of understanding instead of thinking I got it all figured out.
00:13:50
Speaker
And knowing that we do have, we do we do come from two different walks of life and being able to say, hey, I'm willing to grow with you and and see, you know, I never thought about certain things like that, you know, and sometimes I feel naive and you're often teaching me things and saying, hey, friend.
00:14:08
Speaker
actually, you know, maybe that's not a good idea or maybe we shouldn't go there or, its you know, like, oh, really? You know, so I feel like sometimes I'm a little green with some things, but you definitely helped me navigate um this world from a different lens. And that's, to me, that's just forever a gift.
00:14:29
Speaker
And then I feel like for you, I remind you that not everything that deep, you know, sometimes it's just, It's just, ah its it's okay. It's just on the surface. You know, everything is, you you overthinking right now or nobody looking at you like that. Nobody worrying about that. You know, you being way hard on yourself right now. Girl, we all going through that. So, um yeah, to pull you back too because you are very hard on yourself. So I feel like it's a balancing act.
00:14:55
Speaker
But that's what a healthy relationship is. It's a balance in that. Yeah, it's no it's it's almost like everything you said is like there's no coming into the relationship, you know, the friendship. There was no label, you know. And typically, I think, you know, and I'll share this with you. i Do you remember when we went on our walk?
00:15:13
Speaker
Which one? went on many. yeah The one when you asked me, you asked me about, You couldn't believe I think something had happened to me or something. I can't remember the details, but it was life-changing for me because of your response. like it was I can't remember. We were talking about the, I think maybe the sexual abuse or something, and you couldn't even imagine that happened to me. Or I think you you asked a question like like, I don't really ask you because, i don't know. I can't remember.
00:15:50
Speaker
fully. i didn't That's why I was asking you, do you remember the walk when we had like this moment where you you you said, you know ask me about my trauma or you know i don't really know. i didn't out of it i haven't even looked you up or anything or something like that. yeah i mean I remember we had a conversation. well let's just Let's talk about when I went with you to Miami. okay and okay ah That was really the first time that you know, I've heard your testimony told in that way because yeah. So kind of circling back to what you said cause you're like, have you seen my YouTube videos? And have you, I'm like, no girl, I have not seen, I do not be looking you up. You're my friend.
00:16:32
Speaker
Like I'm gonna get to know you organically. You know, I'm gonna get to know you. I will, I feel like there's also a certain piece that, that comes with our relationship because I know God has you in my life.
00:16:45
Speaker
So it's like, I don't need to fact check God. don't need to double. Hey, are you sure? Or let me, you know, let me make sure or let me like, no, like I know where you come from.
00:16:57
Speaker
I know you're a gift and I'm willing to organically allow our, our friendship to continue to grow um and be protected into blossom. But yeah, I remember he was like, yeah, did you hear about my ah testimony or did you, I got videos on YouTube and I was like, girl, no, I don't,
00:17:15
Speaker
yeah And I told you, I was like, if you don't tell me something, then i ain't going to know. I'm not going to ask nobody else either because I feel like whatever you whenever you feel you ready to say something or is appropriate in a certain type of conversation, I'll let you have it. But we went to Miami and you're like, you're going to come with me to Miami? I got you know, i have a training. and I was like, sure, girl. I'm down with Miami. And she was like, okay, ah I'm going to giving my whole testimony. And I was like, okay.
00:17:44
Speaker
And she was like, all right. It's going to be a lot. And I was like, okay, I'm good. We're going to be good. And, uh, you know, I heard it and, um, I was like, wow, I was not as far as it was a lot. It was just like, man, like to, to hear your testimony from start to finish and to see you in real time using those things to help other people.
00:18:13
Speaker
you know, to see you in your calling, using your gifts, like it was just incredibly inspiring. Yeah. You know, I feel like we all have different roles in people's lives.
00:18:23
Speaker
You know, I'm i'm not, i don't, I'm not called to show up as your therapist. I'm just called to be your friend. And i know I can't take all your pain away, but I can authentically show up and love you for you and become, be a consistent part, you know, person in your life. So I just was like, okay, that's what I'm to You know, I'm going just continue to love you. Then after you was like, so how'd you feel?
00:18:50
Speaker
That was a lie. What did i tell you? Do you remember? No. What did you tell him I just was like, yeah, it was a lie. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. what Yeah. And it was relaxing. And it was, the you know, the biggest thing that I really wanted people to know is that me and your relationship, you know, is for sure, like you said, is ordained by God. But it has been such a healing journey for me, too. Because even just recently for your birthday, we were driving up to what we were in Austin.
Open Communication and Life Lessons
00:19:23
Speaker
Yeah. and
00:19:24
Speaker
um her mother, you know, um I was kind of venting about Evelyn and my parenting and my parenting style or how Evelyn's showing up right now, at you know, at the time at six years old. And Ms. Faith, her mother was just like, you know, I'm about to say something with love. But how she's showing up and her tone is how you show up. It's how you talk. And so those are hard conversations for people to receive. I could easily get defensive. I could easily, like I have before with people get defensive or, you know, ah make my point on why I'm right. Or, and I was able to receive it because I know y'all love me.
00:20:07
Speaker
Right. You know, or things that when we went to California, And y'all, I get in the car and I'm like, hey, what's up? Good morning. ah Or what you doing?
00:20:19
Speaker
Oh, yeah. oh And then you got mad.
00:20:26
Speaker
Let me tell y'all the story. Okay. So, you know, we in California, we got some business going on, you know, and I was like, okay, cool. I'm going to pick up my girl. She's going to be at the airport. Yeah.
00:20:37
Speaker
And I'm really, you know, I don't, I'm the type of person, we don't drive the same. I'm not in a rush. Like, I take my time. They call me granny driver or whatever. We always make it to where we gotta go.
00:20:48
Speaker
But, um, you know, she, she from a big city, so she just move faster. She think faster. She move faster. I move slower, you know? Uh, So she she called me. She's like, i'm I'm here. I landed. Now, keep in mind, I've never actually driven to the last you know LAX. So I'm just like, OK, it's a lot going on, but I'm figure it out. And I get there.
00:21:12
Speaker
And apparently, it's just like a drive. You just keep on. There's no parking spots. It's just a road. And I'm like, hold on a second. So then I pass her up just a little bit. And then I parked or I got to the side of something and she was like, she gonna come in the door, swing it all open. like, well, you don't know how to drive. See what you doing? You don't know what you doing. You just passing me up. Like what what you got going on? I say, well, good morning.
00:21:40
Speaker
Hello. How are you? Thank you for coming me up from the airport. See, uh-uh, uh-uh. And then she gonna close door. Well, I guess I gotta get an Uber.
00:21:50
Speaker
Oh my God, girl, my car. Get in this car. I said, friend, this is the first time I'm seeing you in weeks. You think I want to be, you know, the first thing come out your mouth is some fussing.
00:22:02
Speaker
Acknowledge acknowledge i'm I'm here for you. You know, I didn't woke up early. You know, don't like to get up early. And I love you. i'm I'm here. I'm happy to see you. And then she was like.
00:22:13
Speaker
You're right. I'm sorry. but just my But those those little moments, you know, but even even in a time of like disagreement or me holding her accountable for something, it's about how you talk to somebody.
00:22:26
Speaker
You don't have to be disrespectful. The tone doesn't have to go up, but you can still make your point across. And that's just how I communicate. It's not always what you want to hear, but you can still communicate with people with respect and with love.
00:22:41
Speaker
And there's no title to that. Like so many people would probably say, well, you're just trauma informed irony. No, she ain't trauma informed. That's just the way yeah she, she loves. That's the way that she communicates because it's healthy.
00:22:53
Speaker
And so sometimes we try to put these labels on how we show up in our relationships or in our friendships and make it this, like you told me, you've taught me that, like I will make everything a big, deep thing. um And no, it's really simple. It's just, that's how people communicate healthy. That's how they establish a relationship. And it doesn't have to have these titles or attached to someone's trauma or because, you know, you've been through something, I need to respond to a certain way. No, that's how people show up in love the right way. um One of the things, too, you had mentioned about the fast pace. And that's a lesson, too, you taught me was how to slow down.
00:23:30
Speaker
That's something I'm still learning, but um'm I've gotten better at it. It's slowing down because I'm quick. i'm um I'm quick. Like, I'm like, OK, let's move on to the next thing. And it affects our listening. It affects being present with the people that you're with. um And I'm grateful for that.
00:23:47
Speaker
You know, I'm super grateful for that lesson. um There's been so many things that you have just taught me, you know, more recent. You know, you guys, are I can get super stubborn, not stubborn, like...
00:24:03
Speaker
my way or the highway in a way, but respectfully, but like, nah, ain't doing it. And she was talking about how she wanted to raise her family and how she want to, you know, homeschool, how she wanted to sit on a porch with chickens in the back backyard.
00:24:23
Speaker
Right. I'm bringing this up. Yeah. I thought that was ridiculous. I thought it was crazy. Like chickens girl. What? Homeschool. But now I'm in this season, and it's super important as we're navigating seasons on what season you in because you ain't been there yet.
00:24:43
Speaker
I wasn't there yet. Now having three kids and now dealing with the school system, I'm like, and i mean I might need a homeschool teacher. I because i i know that's not how I get if I'm not homeschooling, but if I had the resources to have a teacher come teach my children, I would.
00:25:02
Speaker
Because some of them need a different need than what the other ones. They have a need debt that needs to be met. And where they're currently at is not going to meet that. you know Or i wanted this big life.
00:25:15
Speaker
And now I'm like, well, maybe I need to take a couple chickens and just live on a farm or something. That's how life feels right now in my mind. But the reason I share that is because she also does come, you come with a fresh perspective um that I've never experienced before. you know I've never experienced the perspective of being able to slow stuff down. um You are super not only articulate but very thoughtful about what you say. I'll ask you something. And you'll be like, I need to think about that before you speak. And I know this for the audience. It sounds like, why are we?
00:25:50
Speaker
Because those are skills that a lot of us don't have. Social boundaries. You'll tell me like, all right, friend, I'm off the phone. Bye. To where...
00:26:01
Speaker
I'm done and not like in a bad or a rude way, but you're, you're, you're super disciplined with your time, super disciplined in your health, disciplined in your business. um And those are attributes of, you know, Proverbs 31 woman, of course. But all these things that the seeds that you are giving me, that's getting planted in my life, you know,
00:26:27
Speaker
Teaching me that everything is not about my trauma. Teaching me that you don't have to love somebody based on their story. You know, you you love me because of how I show up and who I am today. And even in my flaws, even in my moments that I cry to you, even in my convictions, you still love me. And you always lead with truth, with the word of God. um And in that response, you know, you've also just allowed me to be a friend. You know, like really enjoy safe fun and be loved. There's been times when you and your mom, you know,
00:27:02
Speaker
I can get super hyper vigilant. And I don't know if anybody else that's watching can relate to this, but I could do things. It's like, and I'm like, i'm I'm sorry. Or, you know, thank you so much. And it's like, we got you.
00:27:15
Speaker
Yeah. Like, girl, you good. like it's gift. Because it is this fear of losing something that's good.
00:27:26
Speaker
Because I've dealt with abandonment. Because I've dealt with rejection. And we all have in some capacity, but But having that safety, and then I remember um the last thing I'll i talk about with you with that piece is, do you remember what mom shared with with your mom shared with you about me and our friendship?
00:27:47
Speaker
In the
Cherishing Friendships and Being Open to Love
00:27:48
Speaker
beginning? Yeah, the conversation she had with you about our friendship. What did she say? She, you know, um this was like after we went out to eat. Yeah.
00:28:00
Speaker
And we just kind of had a powwow. And my mom was like, listen, you know, Ori, she's very gifted and she's something special. And I just want you to know that if you're going to be her friend and be in her life, you need to consistently show up because she's been through a lot.
00:28:24
Speaker
And you just need to make sure that you handle her like a gift. And, and, you know, basically just not to to simplify what I'm saying. It's just that you're not, you've been through enough. you don't need no one playing games with you or showing up 50%, sometimes 70%. You need somebody that,
00:28:45
Speaker
you need somebody that
00:28:49
Speaker
Wants to be in your life. um And it's a pleasure to be there. Not a not a chore or not a responsibility or not. You're not showing up due to obligation.
00:29:00
Speaker
And yeah, she was like, you need to. She's she's been through a lot. She's been through a lot of hard things because at that point, I still didn't know your testimony. You know, she mom heard you speak because like you said, she, you know, you went to her job and she was so moved by, you know, your testimony and you speaking that that's why she emailed you. And I'm just like thinking like, oh, she's just this cool girl and we love Jesus, you know, and I'm excited. And she's like, no, it'ss it's a bit more to that.
00:29:29
Speaker
And i was like, well, of course, mom, you know, I'm a good friend. and I'm a good person. and you don't have nowhere But she did. She was like, I just don't play with her. Her heart is fragile. And I just appreciated that.
00:29:43
Speaker
And then when she told you, she said that, ah I know that that made you emotional, but it's just, she already, we've already, it's like when we initially met, we already had a ah certain amount of of love for you that,
00:29:56
Speaker
just continue to God, just continue to grow and grow and grow. but yeah, she was just like, just don't play, you know, this is not somebody you don't want to, you want to play games with and going be patient about some things.
00:30:09
Speaker
and And I just was like, I got this. You know, and I'm just, I really did, and I still get emotional when I hear it because so for so long, you know, a lot of survivors and just, you know, women and young girls that experience, and even young men and young boys, there's a lack of protection.
00:30:27
Speaker
And when you hear somebody that have not known you for 15 years or this long period of time, willing to protect your heart is something that's a gift. It's very rare. And so, you know, individuals who are choosing to do this kind of work or choosing to to even be friends, if somebody is listening that is that has experienced, you know, all that I've experienced and even more, is be willing to receive love.
00:30:54
Speaker
Be open to it. Yes. You know, um be open to it. Because that's something that I've had to learn is to have my hands open. um Be willing to receive it, be willing to learn, because although we have been through a lot, um that's not the end of it. You know, i have had to learn some serious boundaries with you guys that you all taught me, you know, with my time, how I show up.
00:31:19
Speaker
not overdoing myself um because i'm I'm used to doing that. Because of somebody that has been used for money and used for other for people's personal gain, it's easy for me to try to overcompensate. And you and mama would be like, no.
00:31:34
Speaker
You and your mama would be like, no, you don't have to do that. We got to do all of that. yeah You ain't got to do all that. To be here, to to be loved. And so I'm reminded of that. And then the way that y'all love my daughter, you know, it's so important for individuals to have community, but that's for everybody. It's not just for people that have been exploited, um you know, and sexually abused. It's really for anybody to have community, to have somebody that's holding you accountable, to have people that are loving you, um having people that show up for you consistently, you know, and I'm just grateful that you've been a really great friend to me and you still are.
Mindfulness in Relationships
00:32:12
Speaker
And, you know, the last thing I'll say about friendship is if you have unhealthy people, around you or people that you've trauma bonded with you want to be mindful of those things you know because you were a part of my life that was the new chapter yeah of what god wanted to do and there's still some old chapters that's still there that are still good that are still juicy you know um but i'm very mindful that There's a season in place and I want people to know there's a season in time.
Teaser for Next Conversation
00:32:46
Speaker
Hey everyone, that concludes our episode for part one with irony. Make sure that you tune in for our next episode drop, which is going to be a part two.
00:32:55
Speaker
All right. Looking forward to seeing you there.