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BONUS: Survivor Oree Freeman on Healing, Forgiveness & How the Church Can Truly Show Up | Advocate Series Deep Dive
68 Plays14 days ago
In this bonus episode of the Trafficking Free America Podcast, we take a deeper look into Episode 2 of the Advocate Series, joined by survivor and abolitionist Oree Freeman. Oree shares her powerful story of redemption, healing, and faith—and challenges the Church to move beyond awareness into real relationship, compassion, and action.
This conversation expands on the Advocate Series—a 5-part Bible study led by Francis Chan—produced by the U.S. Institute Against Human Trafficking to help believers confront trafficking with a Christ-centered mindset and heart posture.
💡 Hear how one survivor went from exploitation to advocacy, what “tough love” really looks like in healing, and why the Church must learn to love without expectation.
🔗 Watch the full Advocate Series for free: AdvocateSeries.com
✝️ Become an Abolitionist: USIAHT.org/Abolitionist
🎧 Subscribe to Trafficking Free America for more Advocate deep dives and survivor-led conversations.
🕒 Episode Timestamps
0:00 – Welcome back to the Advocate Series deep dive
0:35 – Introducing Oree Freeman and her advocacy work
2:20 – From surviving to thriving: Oree’s journey to healing
4:00 – Facing PTSD and learning to rest in God
6:00 – Discovering God as Father, Comforter, and King
8:15 – The importance of restoration and rest for survivors
10:10 – How gratitude and faith shape Oree’s healing process
13:00 – Planting seeds: how small acts of kindness change lives
16:00 – Why “noticing” is sacred—seeing the unseen
18:00 – How to respond when you sense something is wrong
21:30 – What trafficking looks like in everyday life
25:00 – Planting seeds vs. rescuing: what the Church can do
29:00 – Stories of love that changed Oree’s life
33:00 – The Church’s role in building consistent, patient relationships
38:00 – Showing up with the right heart: love without expectation
43:00 – Tough love vs. enabling: what real support looks like
52:00 – Serving with discernment and compassion
1:02:00 – Staying committed even when the story isn’t “finished”
1:07:00 – Oree’s final message: love people without expectation
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction and Ori Freeman's Story
00:00:05
Speaker
Hi, welcome back to a Trafficking Free America podcast. ah Today we're going to continue our advocate series, a deeper dive. um And today we're going to be discussing episode two.
00:00:17
Speaker
Our guest today is Ori Freeman. If you've watched episode two, you've been introduced to Ori and her story of when she was first trafficked. um And we're we're going to hear a lot more about Ori. If you want to go back to season one of ah Trafficking Free America podcast, she actually shares ah her entire story, like a lot more details. It's a three episode
Ori's Advocacy and Role of the Church
00:00:39
Speaker
um ah ah season. And then with a fourth episode and talking of, you know, our founder and CEO, Kevin Malone, talking with her about how we can do better prevention. Ori is actually an advocate herself. She is an abolitionist who is helping educate others around like the truth of human trafficking, how it actually happens. And she's helping ah many, many young kids like teenage and a little bit older and and sometimes even younger.
00:01:07
Speaker
to really ultimately understand their value um and help prevent them from being groomed or going into the life like many in many ways she was pulled into it. So um we're excited to talk to Ori and i kind of get a deeper dive into understanding how the church should really respond to episode two of Advocate. And we dive into a little bit more about how how her life was transformed by others and how the church can ultimately help transform lives as well um when they have Christ behind them, when they have this Christ-centered mindset ah going forward it's ultimately to ultimately, you know, help the marginalized, help any anyone...
00:01:51
Speaker
they interact with. it's ah It's a discussion about knowing certain signs, knowing how to combat it by basically developing relationships with anyone we encounter, as Christ has really called us to.
00:02:05
Speaker
And so
Healing Journey and Importance of Relationships
00:02:06
Speaker
she gives ah some really cool insights as to how she does this in her everyday life and how we can also do it ourselves. So without further ado, let's ah get into our interview with Ori.
00:02:19
Speaker
Well, thanks Ori for joining us today. um it's ah It's a pleasure always to speak with you and talk with you. i know that our audience is like eager to hear from you and hear some more stuff from you as well after watching episode two of Advocate, which is, you know, ah hard part of your story and whatnot. But I want you to go ahead and let the audience know like what's, what's who is Ori?
00:02:43
Speaker
What's going on with your life right now? Where has God taken you and everything? I'm actually currently living in Texas and i was definitely called there by God. And, you know, a lot of redemption has happened there.
00:02:57
Speaker
I will be very honest with the audience. I think that people don't recognize that survivors can't heal until they're out of surviving. And so, although I was in California doing a lot of work for the past almost 10 years,
00:03:10
Speaker
I just was still surviving. And that was the biggest thing my therapist talked about is that when I get to Texas, she wanted me to thrive. Because you can be very busy. um You can be full of, you know, doing a lot of advocacy work, but it was good chaos still.
00:03:24
Speaker
And I didn't even realize as soon as I moved to Texas, my life got stable. My life got quiet. That's when the PTSD came in. And it's so funny how God works because my first day up there, I got in an Uber and it was a veteran for over 25 years and he was in Iraq and everything. And he talked about how it wasn't until he got out of the service to when his PTSD started.
00:03:45
Speaker
And so I realized being in Texas recently was like, I need a guy more than ever now because this was the healing process. It's easy to, as as difficult and as hard as it can sound for people that might not understand what it's like to be trafficked or to live a life of consistent chaos and pain and trauma, um it's easy to choose the easiest way out.
00:04:04
Speaker
It's easy to do the things that um that you're known, that you know how to do. It's very much hard and it takes a lot of courage to heal. It takes a lot to face yourself, to face the things that you've been through. And so that's where I'm at right now. I'm definitely in a reflective part of my journey.
00:04:20
Speaker
um God has definitely done, have given me a lot of revelation just living in Texas and raising my daughter. You know, I'm sitting here in my grandparents' house where I lived when I was fresh out of the life and they were sent to me by God. I would not
Speaking to Youth and Relationship with God
00:04:34
Speaker
be where I'm at if God didn't send people to love me and people to show up for me in my life.
00:04:38
Speaker
um I believe in the power of unlikely relationships and he's used people to show his love to bring me closer to him. And so while living in Texas right now, I'm currently in school for philanthropy. So I'm doing a lot of nonprofit management. I'm doing grant writing and learning the business side of things.
00:04:55
Speaker
I'll probably going to graduate school after um and start applying next year. um You know, I'm raising my daughter. I think the biggest thing I read something today in the devotional is that sometimes it feels like I'm not getting any progress right now because of all the different puzzle pieces are being placed together.
00:05:10
Speaker
But I think I'm doing the most important work and that's the work on myself. I can't pour from an empty cup. And I think a lot of times so many of us want to help and we want to pour out, but we haven't been poured into.
00:05:21
Speaker
um We haven't took the time to really heal, to really focus on our healing. And so a lot of things that although I was advocating and I was doing so much work I was advocating from a place of pain and not from a place of healing.
00:05:34
Speaker
And so now I'm able to look at relationships and interactions with the youth that I work with. So I did, I recently just did actually a presentation the other day. um I spoke, I was a keynote for young boys who are incarcerated, who are fighting juvenile life.
00:05:48
Speaker
Some of them are getting released and I didn't see perpetrators. I didn't see, um men who had young boys who might have the crime that they committed. I've seen young boys who who are broken, who come from broken homes, who had stories.
00:06:01
Speaker
And so the only thing that I could give them that was the most important thing is how they move forward. How do you propel forward and what that looks like? And you have a choice now. And so I was able to speak from the heart.
00:06:11
Speaker
And being a woman, um being a female to another male, to being to young men, they hurt me. And so I'm just in a place of of healing. it's It seems so small, maybe to especially society
Challenges in Survivor Healing and Motherhood
00:06:25
Speaker
and to the world right now where we're at, but it's a huge thing.
00:06:29
Speaker
I think my number one focus is the Lord and my focus is my my relationship with Him because I know Him as my savior. I know Him as a savior because He rescued me. He's the only one that rescued me, whether if He used people, um because He used people,
00:06:47
Speaker
But I know him as my savior because he saved me. But I'm getting to know him as my father. I'm getting to know him and respect him as my king. And that's just the truth about it. You know, I know him as saving my life. I know what it's like to be in a bed and I needed, it you know, to get out of it. I know what it's like to jump out of a moving vehicle or escape the hands out of a trafficker or a buyer um I know what it's like to be saved and delivered from drug addiction and those things.
00:07:13
Speaker
But I didn't know who he was as my comforter and as my father and someone that I could depend on and that I can call out to and that could be my best friend. And I surely didn't respect him as my king. And see, that's a different relationship as well. And so being in Texas has definitely given me time to really just rest.
00:07:30
Speaker
I think every survivor needs a ah time to rest and to restore because it's so much stuff. You know, I'm 28 years old And you know getting in maybe to a relationship that was really healthy, I realized that I wasn't ready yet because of the trauma that I've experienced that I still got a lot of healing to do because I'm still numb. I still feel objectified. I still feel like an object to someone who loves me.
00:07:55
Speaker
And so those are the things that we have to work on as survivors or that the community has to come in and help to give survivors rest and to be able to restore, to be able to to really be rejuvenated.
00:08:09
Speaker
So that way I don't end up in healthy unhealthy relationships. I don't end up in an unhealthy or complacent marriage or, you know, I'm not raising my kids at the bare minimum that I'm raising my daughter at my most healthiest place. And yes, that's a journey, but she's my number one.
00:08:24
Speaker
you know, mission right now. And so that's important, you know? So that's where I'm at right now. um But it's been beautiful. I've i've been in such an amazing place that I really want people to understand like where I come from growing up in the hood and and even with the trafficking stuff, seeing gangs, seeing drugs, being in, you know, being exploited.
00:08:47
Speaker
It's so like the culture even of Los Angeles and just where i'm from in California is so different. And then coming to Texas where I never realized God sent me people to give me experiences that would plant small seeds for when I'm an adult, right? Like, pet yes, people tried to help me when I was young, but i just wasn't ready yet. I wasn't in a space to receive it.
00:09:09
Speaker
And now, you know, I'm in Texas and i I sit out on my porch and I watch the sun set. You know, I was in Hawaii recently being in a wedding And all three bridesmaids and the bride are all survivors of sex trafficking.
00:09:23
Speaker
you know And every morning I went out at 5 a.m. to watch the sunrise and to be appreciative of what God has created. That sounds so small to people that I've always appreciated that. Not from some average kid from the hood. like And that has been exploited. And who was taught that when the sun go down, horrific things happen. you know And so I'm just in that place of gratitude, of...
00:09:44
Speaker
the people that he's placed in my life, the things he has given me, um and being reflective about
Building Awareness and Community Intervention
00:09:50
Speaker
how he's worked everything for my good. When I was in the streets, how he sent maybe a missionary on that track.
00:09:56
Speaker
Maybe when I was in group homes and he sent that woman to talk to me, you know, or maybe I was in everything, he worked everything out. I, um, The last bit of detail, at one point when I was with my trafficker, you know I was a little bit involved in gangs.
00:10:09
Speaker
And the other day, a woman, I was talking to a young woman who's still being trafficked. And you know her trafficker is a pimp that is in a gang. And I had a moment with the Lord where I was like, man, God, although the circumstances on how I was removed from the hood might have been a little bit extreme, I'm so grateful because I could imagine what my life would would look like being stuck, stuck in a sin, stuck in brokenness, stuck, just stuck and thinking that's all that life, that's all that life has for you.
00:10:45
Speaker
And I was just grateful. And you know, you also, I'm i'm recognizing in therapy, I do it. a certain type of therapy called EMDR. I talked about it recently, which is, it basically helps um people that have experienced a lot of PTSD reprocess their trauma and not just talk about it, which has has been extremely helpful. They've seen it in even people that have been in, you know, in the service and who just experienced a lot of trauma.
00:11:08
Speaker
um And so we're just talking about survivor's guilt of why me, like why me, what made it? And if I can give any component of what I've been learning about myself, talking to family was, um,
00:11:21
Speaker
My willingness to take responsibility for the things that I do have now and that I can change. um Another skill is being open to relationships, being open to love. I'm so used to my whole life. I chased rejection, but rejected the love of Christ, rejected the love from people that were healthy because it wasn't familiar to me.
00:11:43
Speaker
um And so those were really good skills that I've always had. I just didn't acknowledge them couldn't recognize them. And so for anyone else, that those are things that now when I see other people and then I ah try to pour into other young adults as a teaching them how to how to allow people to love them and why.
00:12:00
Speaker
um and to build relationships because it's the only way that you can do that. It's only way you can't do two about yourself. And so that's where I'm at right now. You know, I'm not in a place of isolation. I'm just in a place of solitude. Do I have my up and downs where I have to get really laser focused on what God has called me to do? Absolutely. Because you can stay stagnant as well.
00:12:18
Speaker
So that's where I'm at. You know, it's not an easy journey. I have trauma reminders all the time, um especially going in and out of friendships. I'm learning moving to Texas, especially being around in a godly community, going to church, being in Bible study.
00:12:31
Speaker
um I realize I still have a lot of growing to do in those areas because I've learned to not be defensive and that the world, not everybody is here to try to attack me or, you know, do you want to be right? I once heard someone say, do you want to be right or do you want to be free?
00:12:46
Speaker
And so that has helped me along in my process. And so now that's where I'm at right now. Being a mom, single mom, navigating that, navigating the ups and downs of that. My child's father recently and in California was shot, you know, multiple of times and trying to navigate what life used to look like and how you let those things enter into your world now to still be able to be a present mom.
00:13:08
Speaker
Um, and then going to school and then working and honestly being obedient to the Lord. You know, I don't have a good job right now. Um, but it's definitely, I'm learning that when you obey God and when you follow the path that he's created for you, he just shows up.
00:13:24
Speaker
And that's the biggest thing for me. You know, I don't like my job where I'm at, but guess what? I get to go to school. i get to flex my schedule. They're very, very, um, mindful and very, they work well with, with just being a single mother and maybe not having babysitting for Evelyn and stuff sometimes. And so even in that, you know, and then people showing up out of nowhere and wanting to give me a scholarship, you know, and being able to help me really rest and like, okay, I'm working this job and don't pay that well.
00:13:52
Speaker
But someone else showed up and said, Hey, I want to help you out. I want you to get through school, you know? So it's just all God. Hmm. That's, that's good that you've, um, that you're, that you're here. And, and I love to hear how, I love to hear how you kind of like, um,
00:14:14
Speaker
what's the word? Like, like you, you, you kind of are able to ah recognize where you're at in a sense of like, okay, this is my environment. This is where, where I'm going with things. You're not, you know, you're, you're aware of things around you. And that's, that's really, that's, that's lot of growth, lot more growth than I hear from people without your trauma, you know?
00:14:37
Speaker
So, you know Inside this episode, um this is episode two, which is like the first time we're kind of like really punching someone a little bit in the gut to to kind of give like, this is what modern day human trafficking is sort of look like like looking like. Here's one aspect of it.
00:14:56
Speaker
And, um ah you know, it... it Unlike some of our other episodes and and like episode three, four, five, where we actually do kind of focus on a little bit more restoration, like your restoration story is actually in episode three. So for those who haven't seen it, got to keep watching.
00:15:14
Speaker
But yeah, but you know the One of the reasons why we we left it the way it was, was we we wanted someone to kind of and we want to kind of end the night with, ah or end the in the video with the idea of, um why didn't you say anything?
00:15:31
Speaker
Which is a quote that you gave.
Recognizing Trafficking Signs and Taking Action
00:15:33
Speaker
um I want to like help the audience understand and know what you mean by that. And how can... what how can we start to think to ourselves, I don't want to miss an Ori.
00:15:47
Speaker
I don't want to accidentally miss something like that. I don't, what, what, what should I look for or what should it even do in that situation? You know, I think someone feels like overwhelmed by that. I know I did when I first heard about like, what would I even do?
00:16:03
Speaker
and Yeah, sure. Human trafficking hotline. I get it. But like, is that what I'm supposed to do? Like, you know, it's just this weird thing going on people's heads. So maybe help, maybe help encourage and help them understand how you can see someone and do something and say something.
00:16:21
Speaker
So I'll give an example. I was in an airport probably a couple months ago and there was a woman that came in. She had a black eye and her nose, you know, her nose was just, I could just tell it had been bleeding and in her lip.
00:16:35
Speaker
I watched probably over 50 people stare at her and look at her and no one said anything. And I walked up to her, I handed her a napkin and I sat next to her. I'm like, is everything okay? And she said, actually, you know, i'm on a flight because I'm i'm running from, um you know, I'm in a domestic violence relationship and I have nowhere where I'm headed. I just got to connect it with an organization.
00:16:58
Speaker
That's all it took. You know, we've heard stories about the flight attendant that thought something was wrong and she slid someone a note on a napkin. I think as humans, as bad as many people don't want to say, we don't say anything.
00:17:09
Speaker
We mind our business. um We see things that might be, um
00:17:17
Speaker
disheartening or that might be a red flag and we choose not to say nothing. We see a young girl with an older man um or we see a young boy with an older man or things like that that just seem out of place and we choose to mind our business.
00:17:28
Speaker
I think the reason why I've done things like that is because the reason why I've said something is because I understand and because I know it, because I've seen things. um Anytime you see someone, um and like another example, I was at my daughter's um swim lesson out here in Orange County, in Orange County.
00:17:45
Speaker
And there was a woman that by her actions, she was very timid um when the the the coach was talking to her. It was very strong. I can just tell by her body language that something was going on.
00:18:00
Speaker
Well, when she lifted up, she had her hoodie on. um She had two dark circles, two black eyes right here. And one, I could think, well, maybe she just has cosmetic surgery, something like that.
00:18:13
Speaker
And so I looked at her, I began to talk to her and I was like, oh, do your daughter always swimmer? She was like, well, I don't really bring her all the time. um My husband do. And so we started talking and she's like, well, what kind of work do you do? And it was just casual conversation. i was like, well, I do a lot of work in sex trafficking, domestic violence. And that's been my kind of like my story and testimony. She was like, wait, what?
00:18:34
Speaker
She was like, they have services like that out here. And I'm like, actually they do. They have programs for women who need to leave or men who need to leave um hard situations. And said, what are the names of those programs?
00:18:46
Speaker
And so it didn't it didn't cause me to ask what's going on. i give her the opportunity. I give her the ah resource. And then she can take what she needs to. Now, she could have made a choice to say to me in that moment,
00:19:01
Speaker
you know, hey, I'm experiencing that, but I know that that was the best that I could give right there. And I think the biggest thing is just like, we see stuff, we don't say nothing. You know, we say call the hotline, but how many people actually dial 911 or call the hotline and call the police?
00:19:15
Speaker
You know, or if you're in a store and you see someone maybe buying a box of condoms, I don't mean to be vulgar, but this is the stuff that happened, or a lot of toothbrushes, or you just know as a human being with a heart posture, I think the biggest thing is Our heart posture hasn't changed to this.
00:19:30
Speaker
I think a lot of people still believe that it's a choice. They look at it like, well, she's old enough to do that. Like, you know, she's been doing this for a long time. So those are her decisions versus not seeing them as a human being, as a child of Christ um and somebody that's just broken and vulnerable.
00:19:46
Speaker
You know, I think that we might see people out in the open, whether if we're at a gas station and they're sitting at a bus stop, oh, she must be on drugs instead of asking somebody, does they need the help? And maybe if they give you the finger, maybe if they say what you don't expect or you want them to say, you then brush it off.
00:20:01
Speaker
All you can do is present an opportunity for somebody to give them a resource or even call. you Are you okay? Do you need help with anything? Is there anybody I can call? If you don't feel comfortable about saying, hey, is there anybody I can call? Law enforcement, you say, is there anyone do you need me to call? It could be a family member. They they might need a call to get out.
00:20:19
Speaker
And so I think a lot of us continue to turn the other cheek um instead of really acknowledging what's right in front of us. Now, some of the signs I mean that people have seen is just when you see somebody in distress, you know, there's never been a person that I have ever passed up that I have seen in distress. I acknowledge everybody.
00:20:39
Speaker
You need to be very mindful of the people that you see. Now, does it hide in plain sight where a woman or a young boy might not be beating up beat up or things like that? Absolutely. But I think that I pay attention. I'm very intellectually aware of my surroundings. And so I can see a young dude. I came out of Disneyland the other day.
00:20:57
Speaker
It was a young boy sitting down on like outside of Disneyland, sitting on this thing. And I looked around. no parents was around at all. um He seemed a little distressed. And I said, hey, sweetie, are you OK?
00:21:09
Speaker
And he said, yeah. And I was like, where are your parents? And it just so happens that he's one of the kids that live in one of the hotels around Disneyland.
00:21:20
Speaker
Right. And so I'm just very aware. And I think that a lot of people choose not to see things as well because we're so busy, you know, and I think. We just have to acknowledge who and what's in front of us.
00:21:33
Speaker
Now it's different. Like I can sit here and say, what do people need to do? Because when you work in any service field, when you're in contact with people, um
00:21:44
Speaker
there are just signs that you can notice whether if it's someone bruised, whether if they're timid, whether if they're with somebody older, what if there seems like they don't really have control over their own belongings or their life.
00:21:55
Speaker
Um, in this day and age, a lot of stuff has just happened over the internet. Honestly, it's happening over the internet, even for women. Um, i was speaking with two women who are still currently in their life and they called me the other day and, um,
00:22:11
Speaker
You know, their parents don't know. But the parent basically called me and said, you know, she hasn't been coming home. She's been leaving my grandchild here. I'm a little bit concerned. And so I was able to call and say like, hey, what what you been doing?
00:22:24
Speaker
And, you know, this young woman said to me, why do you always call me every time I'm doing something? Like, and I was like, well, you just got put placed on my heart. And so I can tell she was intoxicated. You know, it's one in the morning.
00:22:36
Speaker
I'm tired by then. I'm asleep by then. The average person from working a long day is tired, but you're up. So it's small things. It's the things that honestly are out of the abnormal for most families.
00:22:47
Speaker
It's no different than with children, right? Like they're spending a lot of time on the internet. They're talking to people um that are older than them. You know, they're lying about their age or their identity. It's those things that are really important that we have to catch early on as parents.
00:23:01
Speaker
You know, i just had a conversation with my niece the other day because of You know, little stuff. I'm a mom, so was some older dudes at Disneyland, and I caught her looking. I'm like, they ain't your age. So what you looking over there for? You know, and I don't know that has nothing to do with her, but has everything to do with her environment and who she's been raised by, right? so Um, it's those things in all honesty, if I'm out in public, I'm just, I'm very aware of what's around me and and not because I'm hyper, you know, sensitive, but just because I'm paying attention to people.
00:23:33
Speaker
You know, I had a young man that walked in one day. I remember I was walking out the store and it, the trafficking looks different, but it's also a form of exploitation. A young boy coming out the grocery store in orange County. That's predominantly right. Caucasian, Asian Pacific Islander.
00:23:48
Speaker
African American young boy, clothes were really dingy, um school time and you're out and you're selling candy. And I asked him, I said, sweetie, are you okay? Like, who's, where are your parents at?
00:23:59
Speaker
Oh, I'm just here with my buddy. I said, listen, I'm not here to get anybody in trouble, um but why are you not at school? And he was like, well, I gotta make money, you know? And I said, well, baby, you're only, how old are you? And he tried to lie and say 16. And he was like, no, I'm 12 miss. And I'm like, sweetie, you should be at somebody's school.
00:24:14
Speaker
And all I did was wrote my number on a piece of paper. i mean, what what most somebody can do? Thinking somebody could track me down and try to, it's not that serious. Some cases are when they're extreme. But in that moment, I acknowledged him.
00:24:26
Speaker
I wrote, um actually at the time it was my mentor, I wrote his number down because he answered emergency calls. I said, listen, you need some shoes, you need clothes for school and things like that, or yeah your parents need help.
00:24:38
Speaker
Just call this number. OK, I could have gave him a resource. Right. I could have done that. But knowing that African-American male who drove out here from Los Angeles, like they're not going to call a resource.
00:24:49
Speaker
Right. Because somebody has to look like them. It's the most simplest things that we choose not to do. It's little things. I didn't have to put him in my car and save him.
00:25:00
Speaker
All I let him know is I gave him that resource. And i also told him, listen, if you don't do anything else, I need you to stay in school. Because if that's all you have, I need to do that for me. That's it. And letting him know, I see you.
00:25:14
Speaker
And life can get better. I promise you. It don't take that much. I think that we focus so much on the rescue and the, once we identify of how do we save this person? And it's not your job to do that.
00:25:27
Speaker
I think it's to be able to provide resources and help somebody get to the next stage of their life. I wasn't ready. sixteen Yeah. Like,
Impact of Kindness and Relationships
00:25:35
Speaker
how yeah. Like I feel like you're, you're like kind just given a strategy of like constantly plant seeds, right.
00:25:41
Speaker
That you probably will never see blossom. and And so it's a mindset of like, I will not see this blossom, but I will still plant this seed. And which is in many ways, I feel like what Jesus calls us to do on a daily basis.
00:25:53
Speaker
um How many people would you say planted seeds in your life? If you were to like, try to think about it. Honestly, over hundreds of people. I was just talking to my grandparents about that literally last night, how I didn't have appreciation for music, for art, for nature. Right.
00:26:10
Speaker
And I remember sitting on this exact couch I'm sitting on and I was like, grandma, I can't wait to go out the country when I'm old enough and I'm fresh out of life. Right. I'm thinking my pimp used to talk about traveling, all this stuff. And my grandmother said, baby, we have beautiful beaches right here.
00:26:24
Speaker
Nah, want to go somewhere else. And then I text her probably a while ago, about a month ago. And i was like, grandma, thank you for telling me that years ago of how much beauty is surrounded and to stop and smell the roses right where you are.
00:26:38
Speaker
Right? So it's all those things that are, grandpa, am I going to be too loud? Okay. she She hasn't came back yet. and Sorry. Sorry, audience. You're good.
00:26:50
Speaker
And it was just little things. I remember there was an African-American male. And that's important, right? Like my trafficker was African-American. really strained relationships. And I remember being still in the life at 14 years old. And I went to this group home.
00:27:06
Speaker
And he was an older male. And he used to tell me, is I used to mouth off. I was very, and when people would might approach me on the streets. And even if they wanted to help, I was the one that would cuss you out. Like, i don't need help. I don't need God. Leave me alone. Them church people took me out of the church. Like, it's all that, right?
00:27:22
Speaker
And I remember one day he sat down. His name was James. And he said, baby girl, you have such a, God has a plan for your life. And you are so beautiful inside and out.
00:27:33
Speaker
Your face needs to match your mouth. And I'm like, what? He was like, your face needs to match your mouth. Your etiquette. You are a young lady. It's going to be much harder for you anyway because you're a black woman. So,
00:27:45
Speaker
learn how to refine yourself and embrace that. And so like, is it was those small little things that you don't think are really important or really big. And they are right. I'm learning a lot of that with my daughter right now. Right. So she doesn't like to clean up.
00:28:01
Speaker
And so she'll cry about it. And then I'll say at home, sweetheart, there are going to be a lot of lessons in life, lot of things in life, messes that you're going to make, and you're going to have to clean it up. Right. You have to do it on your own.
00:28:13
Speaker
And so it was little things that people taught me. There was a woman that, you know, in a group home that I remember when I first got out of their life or someone like Jim Carson. It was small things. I look back and I see how God, although I was like in juvenile hall or group homes and coming in and out of the out of the life of trafficking.
00:28:32
Speaker
It was just things that people taught me. They were life lessons. Like people didn't need to sit down with me and say, you know, you're living a life of prostitution or or exploitation and God has a plan. And I didn't need that.
00:28:46
Speaker
They were planting seeds of life. Listen, when you get an adult, you have to learn how to communicate appropriately because when you get out in the real world, nobody's gonna hear you.
00:28:56
Speaker
And so it was all those things where people planted seeds that made me start believing um not only in God, but in my in myself and my worth. So I remember at one point when I was at this group home um in Orange County and they would hug a lot, right? Like they would hug you. They would tell me how much you are worthy, all these things.
00:29:17
Speaker
And when I left the group home, I was going to go back to my trafficker. And I was going we call it AWOL, somebody goes AWOL. And so I i left the the place, I AWOLed, I went up the street, and I had this whole plan in my head of how I was going to physically rob somebody. All these things in my head, I was going to do that to another individual.
00:29:35
Speaker
Well, when I got to the Stater Brothers, I started crying because I couldn't do And I called the people, this lady that was a house mom, and i said, Amy, what are you doing to me? What are you people doing to me?
00:29:48
Speaker
You people are crazy. What are you doing to me? Because I couldn't hurt another human being. because it was the love, the love that people poured over me when I would scream, when I would yell and you know, to Bria or Regale, they would hug me so tight. i'm like, Nope, I'm not letting you go.
00:30:05
Speaker
Like to show me that no matter how broken i felt, no matter how unworthy I felt and sorry audience, that's my daughter and my grandmother in background, but um I was loved and then I was worthy of love no matter how bad, filthy I felt.
00:30:21
Speaker
And I think, They were life lessons. It's not this big grand thing that people try to make it seem with trafficking victims of like, my grandparents loved me right where I was. Like, I would have never expected to to come and live with individuals who were from separate worlds from me.
00:30:38
Speaker
You know, in count Southern California, like, I remember first moving up here, I was like, my grandparents live in a gated community. Like, you would accept me. You would love someone like me. And I think people miss that, that we feel that inside. Like, how could someone one like you love someone like me?
00:30:58
Speaker
You know, my my daughter's great godfather is a police officer that I met during training and and doing first starting the work, first getting out the life. And I remember the first
Reframing Experiences and Growth Opportunities
00:31:09
Speaker
time he invited me to his home.
00:31:11
Speaker
I was like, you would invite me to your home? And yeah, Ori, why wouldn't I? And I'm like, No, no, no, i don't think you understand. We're from two different worlds.
00:31:22
Speaker
And I think that so many of us survivors and advocates feel so like we're two we're from two different like galaxies or something. Because why would someone like you acknowledge me, love me, serve me, pour into me?
00:31:39
Speaker
because I don't act like you, I don't talk like you, don don't come from where you come from. And I think that's just so important that the two worlds can also can collide. can kali I can learn from you and you can learn from me. And so it's small things that we can give to these people. we can give to people who experience this stuff.
00:31:55
Speaker
And it's ultimately about seeing them, you know, acknowledging that they're a human being, acknowledging that they have something to offer, whether that's a skill, whether that's housing, whether those are the mechanical things or whether that's just a hello, whether it's just seeing them. You know, I had so much church hurt.
00:32:10
Speaker
And I remember the first time my grandmother had took me to church again, you know, and and these people, I'm like. Why are these people like this? This is not what I'm used to and accustomed to. You know, I was so used to being condemned and told I was going go to hell, all these things versus what I'm experiencing. And so it's also about giving survivors and people that are experiencing trauma, new experiences and opportunities to relive things in a positive way. Right? I was trafficked right across the street from Disneyland and a Motel 6 before it became the best Western plus.
00:32:40
Speaker
Right? I can say and sit here and say, I never want to go to Disneyland because I watch people go in there, those families and do all that. Or I can say, hey, I'm going to go with my family with a new organization that took me to Disneyland for the first time when I'm an adult and got a new experience.
00:32:57
Speaker
Right? So it was... small moments. I can honestly say when it comes to kids, it's exposure. It's things that they might not see no value in it right now, but they will later on. You know, I, when I was fresh out of the life, when I was 15 years old and I mate started making the transition, um I remember going to like plays and operas and banquets and etiquette stuff.
00:33:18
Speaker
And, you know, going to the universities, UCLA, USC, and all these different schools to get exposed to stuff. And then being a college student now and being like, wow, I had no idea that those little small moments would lead to big dreams, right?
00:33:32
Speaker
You don't think it is because maybe the kids are running around the campus. Maybe they're talking, oh, we got to walk. They're teenagers. What do you expect them to do? No different than coming from a healthy home and being like, man, why we got to go down there for family church? don't want to do that. It's because it's something they're so accustomed to versus kids that aren't.
00:33:49
Speaker
It's the same thing. And so I think it's about... If you're a part of the community and maybe you don't service people in the front lines, but what can you do? Time, resources.
00:34:01
Speaker
I think those are the things that you can give. Maybe you're not in an environment where you might see trafficking, right? But maybe it's your time. How can you serve other people? Maybe it's your resources. Do you know people that might have job opportunities that can provide survivors that are ready to be in the and and the the work field?
00:34:19
Speaker
um It can be other things of like time that is intimate. You know, maybe I do a workshop. Maybe I go and serve in that way. um Maybe I go and meet with the girls and and meet or meet with the team. How can I help the team navigate working with them? Maybe I'm a business owner.
00:34:34
Speaker
What can I teach the team to start teaching them how to budget and manage money? You know, I met my grandparents, just to be honest, the house that i'm at right now, I met my grandparents at 16 at a Saddleback Skills for Life.
00:34:48
Speaker
at a resource place. And what happened was building relationship. That's it. Relationship had nothing to do with trafficking. Yes. It was provided by a nonprofit organization for foster youth that were transitioning out of the system, but they decided to say, Hey, like they were open to having a relationship with me. Like,
00:35:11
Speaker
That's all it takes. Can I say that everybody can do that? No. Did they have, did we have our ups and downs? Absolutely. we two from Two from separate worlds. Was there a middle person, Jim Carson, that helped navigate those things and did my relationship change over the years?
00:35:26
Speaker
Did it grow? Yes. I think that we make it so complicated than what it is. You know, every survivor that I've known, over 175 of them, whether they received services or they didn't, what really helped them in their life was connections and resources.
00:35:41
Speaker
Is there red tape in the system? Yes. So people that don't work in the system that is in ministry or might just be teachers or might be parents that find out about this issue and want to help.
00:35:52
Speaker
It's about connection. I'm not telling you to move somebody your house. I'm not telling you to do that, but give what you have. That's all you gotta do. Give it and then don't expect anything in return. I think as human beings, we want a return in a good way. We wanna see it blossom, but it's gonna they're gonna blossom in their own timing.
00:36:10
Speaker
And I think that's the biggest thing I'm leaving or learning in my own life, serving kids that guess what? What has helped me so much is that day when I went to go work with those young boys or when I'm working with a young girl right now in Chicago,
00:36:22
Speaker
Guess what? She might leave tomorrow. But what I did was I gave time. I gave all that
Community Support and Practical Ways to Help Survivors
00:36:28
Speaker
I could. And at the end of the day, I showed up and I was present. And I can't expect her to want to talk to me every single Thursday.
00:36:37
Speaker
I love you, Grandpa. Okay. I'll talk to you soon. Okay. You know, so it's all those things that is so small, but really big. It's, it's,
00:36:48
Speaker
These kids are not asking for a lot. These young adults are not asking for a lot. Like my heart hurts because like I'm talking a younger adults that like, I just want stability.
00:37:00
Speaker
I just want somebody to love me. I want people in my life to surround me. I am so blessed. When I say blessed, I have hundreds of people who are in my life that will show up for me.
00:37:15
Speaker
Hmm. When life gets rough, when I moved to Texas and life got hard. How can we as a church make everyone feel that way? You know what mean? Like, like that, that's not something that rare, there should be a rarity when you have, how many, how, um how many, how many Christians do we have in this nation or professing Christians? How many churches do we have in this nation?
00:37:38
Speaker
Every person should have hundreds of people.
00:37:42
Speaker
How can, how can we, how, how can we start making society and our culture feel like they got a hundred people in their corner ready to have a relationship with them as well as help with resources?
00:37:58
Speaker
How can we, how can we make people feel that way? Well, think the first step is so before one of my mentors passed away, Jim Carson, um, one of his nonprofits, he talked about, he wanted to start a program that was called stronger together.
00:38:14
Speaker
And what it was about was connecting with ministry workers, connecting with all different types of people that wanted to be in an individual's life. He was going to give you room because when you think about nonprofits, most nonprofits or organizations don't want you to get close to the survivors, right? Because they want to be mindful.
00:38:31
Speaker
But he created a program that was going to be vetted, right? That when you came in, okay, you want help individual? Can you wrap your arms around this family, this mother, this single mother of three kids who's a survivor, who's who survived drug addiction, who survived you know her pimp or been to prison?
00:38:46
Speaker
Can you wrap your hands around her? Can you wrap your family around her? And what does that look like? And what it looks like practically was like there was going to be a buffer. That would be me. That would be other survivors. Help the other family navigate that relationship.
00:39:00
Speaker
And what does that look like? How might it might ebb and flow, how it might get difficult sometimes and be able to have a middle person to say, to talk to the survivor and this individual to say, hey, um this person is passionate and wants to help you and your family and wants to just love on you.
00:39:18
Speaker
You love me, right? You respect me. You trust me. The biggest thing is trust. You trust Ori. So do you trust that these people that I'm bringing into your life will do that as well?
00:39:29
Speaker
Yes, I do. And that's the thing. It's the middle person. program and just somebody that's experienced something. It's hard to just say, trust me that these people going to do the right thing.
00:39:41
Speaker
Well, don't even know you from Adam Eve. You're just a program. like Like you need someone there that can build a rapport, a relationship. And so that's the practical piece. I think that the body of Christ, the biggest thing is you have a lot of people that have a lot of time sometimes. And I'm not talking about from jobs. I'm talking about even in age, a lot of our elders that can make time for those types of things.
00:40:02
Speaker
Um, and support families and support the mothers or support the children. And I think sometimes you want the hands-on stuff or maybe it's help supporting the mom to give her two children an opportunity to be in a sport and she can't afford it. But then we start slowly like, hey, we're going to help you put these kids in ah some type of academia or something.
00:40:22
Speaker
And then we're going to come to the games. And then we're going to come to the ceremony, right? It's those things how you show up How can you create opportunity for believers or non-believers, doesn't matter, however that looks, um to show up?
00:40:37
Speaker
Because that's the biggest thing, is the consistency and the show up. My grandparents, just giving them an example, and other people have been to Evelyn's birthdays. um When I dedicated Evelyn back to the Lord, her godfather was there.
00:40:52
Speaker
um He thought that he would, you know, it would be a whole bunch people. It was just them, right? Like, and You know, when she has birthday parties, people show up, Christmases, Thanksgiving.
00:41:03
Speaker
It's the constant stuff that, what do you do with your own family? It's not that hard. And so it's the show up. How can you help support? A woman named Karen has an organization called Hands to Feet.
00:41:15
Speaker
Every Mother's Day, you know, my father is no longer living, my mentor Jim, and she sent us a card. You know, she sent us some goodies. Like she sent us little things. I was like, wow, that's really sweet. You know, when you're younger, you're like, what, you sending me a face mask for self-care? And I'm like, oh, thank you for this self-dislotion now that I'm an adult, right? And I'm budgeting and all these things. I'm like, man, thank you, Karen, for that.
00:41:35
Speaker
It's little things. It's not that. It's just to show up for them. But let me ask you this, though. When when it comes to someone showing up, which is extremely important, and and i I would argue that so there are people that do show up. but But I think you know this.
00:41:52
Speaker
What's the heart behind it And yeah if you know that you're kind of doing it for sort of your own self-righteousness or own pride, I feel like, like if people did that to you, were you able to see right through it?
00:42:08
Speaker
Yes. um
00:42:12
Speaker
It is. My dad used always talk about this, about how a lot of us that have experienced trauma will test people that love us. And he would say, they're not testing you. They're they're testing the people that have hurt them, right? Because they've had a redevolving during their life.
00:42:30
Speaker
And I'll give you a good example. i have a mentor right now who's like my mom. I call her mom. My daughter calls her Nana. And she's up the street. how She lives up the street. And Sherelle was brought to me through Jim.
00:42:42
Speaker
Same way through my grandparents, right? Jim seen an article, a newspaper. And he knew, no offense to anyone, as a Caucasian man, And as a black woman, there were things he could not teach me.
00:42:55
Speaker
Right. And how to navigate certain things. And so we were having this conversation. i'm like, dad, you just don't get it. You just don't get this part. And he said, okay, baby, you're right.
00:43:07
Speaker
And one day he's at the beach where he goes every five o'clock in the morning, he opens up the paper and what do you know? Sherrill Jackson. top CEO firm, um things like that.
00:43:20
Speaker
And give me second. Grandma, you got to leave, right? Okay. um African-American woman, partner in her firm from Los Angeles, California, ah overcame domestic violence, comes from the hood, right? It was like right there.
00:43:36
Speaker
And he wrote her a letter, a simple email, a simple email and said, hey, Cheryl Jackson, and you don't know me and I don't know you. I don't want any of your money, but I got a young girl that needs to know you and you need to know her.
00:43:50
Speaker
I now have a stocking over their chimney, me and my daughter, her whole family. Everyone knows I am that woman's daughter. Has it been easy? No. We just got into it the other day because she has three sons, right?
00:44:05
Speaker
Never had a daughter before. And then we both from the streets and she's refined. And I look up to her. She's a business woman, like amazing. And she has, when Jim was alive, Jim would help navigate. Like, listen, I remember we had an incident for one at one time. i remember I was hurt because she left, but I wasn't hurt because she left. I was hurting because my mother left.
00:44:28
Speaker
And i was like, mom, why are you going with him? Like, why are you going with your boyfriend? My mom's a 60 year old woman. Oh, what hang with her boyfriend? Girl, I'm just with y'all week. I'm going on with my boyfriend. And I remember it was like little Ori showed up.
00:44:42
Speaker
Not 20-something-year-old Ori. 15-year-old Ori that was, it you know, 9-year-old Ori that was abandoned showed up. And so I was scared. I was like, Mom, like, why are you leaving? And it it got to the point where I was like, well I'm just packing my stuff. Me and my baby, we out of here. I don't got to deal with this. Like, I mean, somebody that's completely on stage, nobody would recognize, right?
00:45:03
Speaker
Now, she could take that and say, I can't do this with Ori. It's a risk. It's all this. And every time afterwards, when we just, the other day we had a conflict because I was like, you do stuff that's convenient for you. And she was like, I love you.
00:45:17
Speaker
I give you my 100%. Now, if your feelings are hurt about something, you need to say that to me. Once again, younger Ori showed up, not adult Ori. And I was like, mom, I'm so sorry that I was disrespecting. She said, you didn't disrespect me.
00:45:30
Speaker
You hurt my feelings. And I love you. It's nothing that
Balancing Support and Independence
00:45:34
Speaker
you can do to make me not love you or Evelyn. But how many people actually would do that?
00:45:40
Speaker
Most people would get in a conflict and say, I can't deal with this youth. I can't do this. This is really hard. Well, love is hard. You do with your kids. So I think that's the heart posture, right? I could see right through stuff. I know that she loves me. I know my grandparents love me. I've also known we had a moment when I first lived with them, we talked about it last night.
00:45:59
Speaker
um They moved me into their home coming out their life. That's difficult, right? I left on New Year's Eve. I wanted to go out, hang out with friends. My grandparents said, no, it's unsafe. We don't want you driving all the way to l LA in the car.
00:46:13
Speaker
We don't want you drinking, right? Instead, I lied, said I was going to work. Of course, his grandparents, they went up to my job to just support me. Like, baby, we're so sorry. Like, if you want to go out and do something with us, well, guess what? I wasn't there.
00:46:27
Speaker
So they prayed. They said, you know what, Ori, you've been here for a while. and And this is obviously something you don't want to do and abide by these rules. So you have to figure out a place.
00:46:39
Speaker
Most people like you put her out. No, they didn't. I didn't follow the rules. I didn't listen. Did they still continue to support me? Absolutely. But I had to figure it out. How did they balance that, that tough love with,
00:46:51
Speaker
also staying with you. like Like, cause, cause you mentioned in your story how, um and and not in the specifics about episode two, but um if anyone who hasn't listened to season one of our podcast, trafficking free America, please go listen to Ori story.
00:47:04
Speaker
But um you mentioned in your story that like your mom, you know, said I'm done. Right. ah what What made this different in this situation? I want to make sure that the audience understands that tough loves can be necessary, but there's a big but there. And what is that?
00:47:22
Speaker
Well, kid, I'm different. i I was employed. I had a job. and I had financial stability. And so, and i also had other people I could go stay with in temporary, but what it did, it made me save my money to go get my apartment to be responsible.
00:47:38
Speaker
Cause there's a difference between helping and enabling. And so that's the same thing with serving people. Right. um I think the difference was, was that I was 12 years old, still needing chances versus 19 years old and having resources.
00:47:53
Speaker
Right. That's. Yeah. yeah Yeah. Yeah. So what? So, okay. Yeah, no, you I apologize. I was thinking that you were a little younger when you were mentioning that. So, so what? Okay. So let's, let's, let's create a scenario that of like, what,
00:48:06
Speaker
you know I hear what you're saying there. So like the question is, in a general way, how do we show tough love by showing that we're not going anywhere at the same time?
00:48:19
Speaker
I mean, you have to also, ah the biggest thing that happened with, let's say, tough love, right? So the system is changing in California and across the nation. And I had multiple of you say to me, when they got the system, they've received resources.
00:48:32
Speaker
People know about sex trafficking. They're providing with help. the Okay, y'all want opportunity? We gave you opportunity. you know what they told me? The system coddled us. And I'm like, what?
00:48:43
Speaker
What do you mean? they're like, well, when we got into the real world, nobody cared that I was a sex trafficking victim to give me an apartment. They don't care. When I went on my job interview, you don't care that I'm a sex trafficking survivor.
00:48:55
Speaker
I still got to come to work. So I think there's there needs to be a healthy balance of stuff, right? And that's what I had. I had such a great healthy balance. And so what that looked like was when I... So for example, younger survivors might have outbursts. They might get triggered.
00:49:11
Speaker
They might yell. They might do things like that um and be upset, feel unsafe. And so they might... do something. And so for me, I would like fight, break windows, stuff like that.
00:49:25
Speaker
And I had a probation officer that taught me accountability. It's the biggest lesson I ever learned. And she said, after you do something, you made that decision.
00:49:36
Speaker
I want you to call me first before they call me. Because if they call me first, they're going to tell me their side story and I can't hear you. So I want you to call me after you have an outburst.
00:49:47
Speaker
That taught me accountability. I promise you for my whole life. That's probably why I'm so good at certain things because it taught me to take responsibility. And so I was like, I'll be like, hey, Miss Wilfolk, which that's some Evelyn's godmom. Isn't that beautiful?
00:49:59
Speaker
The relationship, right? That's Evelyn's godmom now, and now a business partner. And I was like, Miss Wilfolk. She be like, what happened, Ori? And I'm like, well, I was on the phone with my mom. She said she doesn't want to do family reunification.
00:50:10
Speaker
So I got upset. I threw the milk carton and threw all the chairs down and broke the plates. Why did you do that? I was like, well, because I was mad. And then the staff hung up the phone on me and didn't give me time to say goodbye to my mom. OK, so your feelings were hurt. You didn't get to say goodbye to your mom.
00:50:28
Speaker
Now, why would you go and break property that don't belong to you? Because I was mad. Well, you can't do that. Would you do that if that was your house? No, I wouldn't. So don't do it there. Because now those people got to clean that up.
00:50:40
Speaker
And so even though i might not have heard it at the time, it taught me to take accountability. But then she would also say, now you know your consequences, right? And I would be like, yeah, I'm gonna be on red and i can't go to I can't go to the the game this week or I can't go to the the out the youth event this week.
00:50:59
Speaker
And do you know why you did that? Why you can't go to the event? Yes, because I chose to when I got upset to do that, right? She said, well, in a couple of days, if your behavior is much better and if you cannot have any outbursts, then we'll reevaluate.
00:51:13
Speaker
Now, new society culture will say, no, no, no, no. no you That's a charm reminder. Give her opportunity. But Ori in my head would be like, ain't gonna get in trouble for it. I'm gonna keep doing it. Right? So that's the tough love part.
00:51:28
Speaker
it's It's things like that or And I can only speak because, let's be honest, a lot of the tough love doesn't only happen until they get into service fields. If they're incarcerated, if they're in group homes, or if they're in foster homes.
00:51:40
Speaker
But tough love and relationships, like we just talked about, a young woman who's still in life called my grandparents, needed help and assistance. Hey, they helped her out, got her a ride, an Uber. They sent through $10 for what she asked for.
00:51:54
Speaker
Then after that, when you keep calling aside, no, you figured out how to get there. Now you got to get back. You know why? Because you're still using drugs. I can't keep doing that because the last couple times we supported.
00:52:08
Speaker
And that's okay. And guess what? I'm still going to accept your phone call. I'm still going to come visit you. I'm still going to love on you. And Jim did that. um Tough love looked like when I was speaking at one point, when I first started speaking, um I didn't stop using at first, like when I was like fresh, fresh, like 18 years.
00:52:30
Speaker
And I remember had gotten intoxicated and was high. And I had a speaking event and that man came in my house. He had a key to my house. She's like, key to my house.
00:52:42
Speaker
And he you know he called me, called me, called me. And we had that type relationship. And that man came in there. ah didde i ain't telling you to do that, but that was my daddy. He was hardcore from Brooklyn. you know my That was my mentor.
00:52:55
Speaker
And literally like, yeah There was water. I felt water on my face and I woke up and he was like, get up. And I was like, no, I went out last night. He was like, get up.
00:53:07
Speaker
You made a commitment to go speak to these people. Get your butt up. You decided to go out and get drunk last night. Go eat some food. Go drink you some milk. Get your butt up. He said some other things because like he said, but get up there get yourself together.
00:53:21
Speaker
And I remember being in a car like like half a asleep. I remember it just taught me to like, You want to be an adult, you want to be grown and you want to do grown stuff that you better be able to handle your business the next day.
00:53:34
Speaker
And it's just little things. It was tough love. It was like, I remember it's my broken my car. um remember I lied actually little stuff like this. I lied about some somebody breaking into my car. so I didn't have my rent.
00:53:46
Speaker
So I called my mentor. i was like, Oh Jim, i didn't have my rent, blah, blah, blah. Somebody broke into my window. Okay, cool. Oh, my car got impounded for this when really I was somewhere I probably shouldn't have been.
00:53:58
Speaker
Right. And it got took him and he helped, he supported. Guess what? Next time. Oh, dad, uh, I locked my key in a car. My money's in here i don't have my rent. Figure it out.
00:54:11
Speaker
That sounds so,
00:54:15
Speaker
it's like, we try to support survivors in the things we think that they need when it's like, they're really they really just need stability. They need stability. They need a healthy environment. They need opportunities the same way that you would give your own children opportunities.
00:54:29
Speaker
And so and I know that those don't seem practical for people that are engaging. But if you want to engage with them, I think that the biggest thing is most people are going to probably want to provide services. And so when do you know when to stop providing services for someone?
00:54:42
Speaker
And I think that that door should always be open because you never know when someone is is at their worst and they need the help. I think that you just have to, whether it's the programming or discernment. And I'm saying as a believer, like you praying about things. So my grandparents are being on, they pray about everything, everything when it comes to that.
00:55:04
Speaker
And so it's it's it's simple stuff like that. Like you don't move unless the Lord says move too. You know, I'm spiritually asked for me too. and When I need to help somebody, I had a young girl right now who needed help that I prayed about. And i was like, you know what? I can't support you in this way, but I'll support you this way.
00:55:18
Speaker
You know, I'm not giving you a flight ticket back to California. Um, and then I know, I know she's going to run again. I'm not doing it, but Hey, I'll get you a bus ticket.
00:55:31
Speaker
And guess what? The bus might be longer, but there was a compromise. And so it's, it's stuff like that, right? If I want to help a want young woman or a young man out, um, I'll say, Hey, I got this one dude, he was being trafficked, a young boy.
00:55:43
Speaker
Um, I would get him Ubers until when he like, Oh miss, I need an Uber at my house. I said, I'm not doing that. You found your way to here. You could do it again. Like it's only so much. Now I'm not saying I've done it one or twice.
00:55:56
Speaker
I probably did it like eight times with an Uber. But then after the eighth time, I'm like, no, you're going to your friend's house. I'm not doing that. And guess what? He found his way there. Right. So it's been, it, it,
00:56:07
Speaker
take so i think I think you got to earn the trust first before you can truly be tough. That's kind of what you're saying. is like like figure out I think people want to start out with a tough relationship.
00:56:19
Speaker
Oh, no. Yeah. You have to be very gentle. You have to be very gentle. um I think the biggest lesson that I've learned for me and for what my father did was you have to meet people right where they were.
00:56:34
Speaker
And that's the thing he did. You might want to meet me at the church. I don't want to meet at the church. I'm meet you at the Denny's. And that was Jim. And Jim used to always say, because people would tell him, those kids are just using you.
00:56:50
Speaker
Those girls and those guys are just using you. And you know what he would say? It's okay. I know. But they're not using me. I let them use me. Because you know what? They might be calling me because I need to eat because they haven't eaten three days.
00:57:04
Speaker
But guess what? In the 25 minutes that I got with them, I'm getting ready to pour into them. Yeah. And I think that was a thing is that do I know that sometimes my kids might be like, oh, Miss Freeman, I need this. I need that. Or, oh, yeah, are you busy today to come see me? Because I need to get my prom dress. But guess what?
00:57:20
Speaker
Did they really use me? Or I'm trying to give them an experience that I didn't have or that they did that they did to that they deserve. And so it takes time. I think we want to rush things, even as a community, when you're doing this work or if you want to get into this work, you can't rush trust.
00:57:35
Speaker
Jim always said that it takes a survivor like five to six. five to seven years to completely trust. Now for somebody else that like, whoa, but I've known Jim for over a decade now before he passed away. And so I always knew, I trust that he could make the best decision for me.
00:57:50
Speaker
I trusted that he was on all my medical papers that if I ever ended up dead or life support, I knew he wouldn't pull the plug or that he would make the right decision. I trusted that.
00:58:01
Speaker
But it wasn't until um right before he died, Last year, we were at at the beach and I can't explain it.
00:58:14
Speaker
I've always called him Pops. We all called him Pops. All of his kids called him Pops, all of his mentees. And it just happened naturally. We all called him Papa or Pops. But it was one day we were on the phone and you know when you're a trafficking victim, a lot of times you call your trafficker, your pimp, like daddy and stuff like And it was one moment when he was like,
00:58:35
Speaker
all right, baby girl. He was all right, baby. Now, anybody else would be like, that is so inappropriate. But it wasn't. It was so fatherly when he said it. He was like, all right, baby girl, I'm about to go to sleep.
00:58:48
Speaker
And it was so nurturing. And I could tell you, after over 10 years, our relationship took a pivot. Where I was like,
00:59:00
Speaker
Hey, that's my daddy. That's my dad. It's nothing nobody could tell me. And i remember walking with him on the beach before he died. Like he was talking to me on the phone the other the day, dad. And he was like, all right, baby girl.
00:59:12
Speaker
And it like solidified us. Like, this is my father, you know, like anything traumatic, any perverted thing that I've experienced,
00:59:26
Speaker
It was nothing. was It was my father. and he was talking to his baby girl. And that takes time. And I think a lot of people, please be dedicated for the long haul and the long ride.
00:59:40
Speaker
And we know when your heart is pure. My grandparents, they're white, come from Southern California, like different backgrounds. And they just love me.
00:59:52
Speaker
They love me. They sat up here till 10 o'clock at night talking to me about the Lord and how to navigate life. And they love me. theyve They've shown up and it hasn't been easy. And it's not going to be easy. And that's what I'm going to tell people. I tell people it's not easy loving people that have experienced this kind of stuff, but it ain't easy it ain't easy raising your kids neither.
01:00:12
Speaker
So it's the same type of love. I think that it's the expectation. Stop placing expectation on why you serve and to keep serving.
01:00:23
Speaker
It's not that difficult. And so love with no expectation is, I mean, that's biblical, right? Don't be easily offended. Love doesn't expect anything. Like it it just doesn't.
01:00:34
Speaker
The Lord wasn't like that. Jesus wasn't like that. he didn't expect anything for somebody to be washing his feet or, you know, meeting someone at the will that they had anything to give. And I think that's the key is that the people that you choose to serve and that you want to serve have nothing to give. So will you continue to serve them?
01:00:52
Speaker
And so that's the heart posture. You know, what does that look like practically in different fields? It's going to look different. But we know, we know, i know, you know, I have a great relationship with Kevin Malone.
01:01:06
Speaker
And like him and his wife believe in me, believe in my vision. And like, man, they've just showed up for me. When I had to move to Texas, you know, like what's holding you back? I don't got it right now, Kevin. No, you leaving him in Maryland. No, you getting up out here. You're going to Texas.
01:01:25
Speaker
God called you there. You going with have nothing in return. And I knew that, you know, Kevin don't look nothing like me. You know what I'm saying? Like, and so, but his heart is his passion.
01:01:37
Speaker
It's his, it's the biggest thing that we, that I use now from him is I'm like a bull in a China shop, right? Like it's his, It's his heart to want this stuff to to be eradicated and change.
01:01:49
Speaker
And you know that, you know when it's just something that people genuinely like, he genuinely wants to help survivors. He wants to help me. He wants to help them.
01:02:01
Speaker
Versus, to be honest to the audience, so many people are jumping on this trafficking train. Like,
Serving with Love and Religious Community Challenges
01:02:07
Speaker
I want to do human trafficking work. I want to serve them. And like, you don't know how nitty gritty this stuff gets.
01:02:12
Speaker
Like, are you really in it for the good cause? Because it don't end up, kids die on you. I've lost kids. Kids have been killed, have been murdered. Um...
01:02:24
Speaker
And it don't always end up good. Everybody is not an Ori Freeman. Everybody doesn't get the success story. Everybody's not a Rebecca Bender. Everybody's not a Leah Albright. Everybody's not, you know, um, a Josie Feimster or a Christina.
01:02:38
Speaker
They don't always end up like that. So will you still love, will you still serve when you don't know how this story ends? I have a last question for you. Um,
01:02:51
Speaker
As people hear your story and yours yours is the first story that they're going to hear in this series.
01:02:58
Speaker
What do you want people to think about, understand, and feel after hearing your story? What is the purpose you want your story? um what What purpose do you want your story to be or to have?
01:03:14
Speaker
I want people to learn how to really love unconditionally and not expect anything in return. um and to live a life of service. That was my dad's quote.
01:03:26
Speaker
And no matter what you're doing, whether you're some white guy from Brooklyn or some black girl from wherever, right? Little black girl from the hood. And like, I still have a lot to give, you know? And whether that's me being a school counselor, whether if I'm a mother, whether if I'm working at Walmart, it doesn't matter where I'm working at.
01:03:49
Speaker
I can still serve other people and love other people, you know, and whatever you have to give, give it because you can't take nothing with you. And I think my life mission is not only to live a life of service, but to die empty.
01:04:03
Speaker
I want to give everything that I have away, everything, all of me, everything that is inside of me, that God has placed there. I want it out there for the next generation. You know, all the lessons, all the love that I have to give, like, I want to go like that.
01:04:18
Speaker
And I think that The biggest thing is that so many people think they have a hard posture, but we place conditions on our relationships. We place expectations on our relationships.
01:04:30
Speaker
I'm in a Bible study group and I'm watching how people place expectations on how you want to serve Christ. That ain't the way it is. And I think it's the biggest lesson that I'm learning myself and that I want other people to know, like,
01:04:44
Speaker
To just do it. Like just love people. we place We place expectations on how we want to be loved. Listen, I'm all for self-care. I'm all for these this boundary stuff.
01:04:57
Speaker
And the Lord has given us boundaries because he loves us. But all this stuff is like, it's really about you. You really make it about you. You make it on how you want people to love you and how you want to serve and what you get to gain and how it makes you feel. It ain't about you. It's all for his kingdom.
01:05:14
Speaker
And so when we do a better job at that, then we can do a better job of really helping restore and redeem what has been stolen and lost in the boys and girls and the women and men who've been exploited.
01:05:31
Speaker
That's the biggest thing. It's the biggest the biggest lesson that I want people to get and that I want people to do is just to serve. Serve with all your heart. Serve however you can.
01:05:42
Speaker
And then just love with no expectation. And just do that. If you can do that, it makes it much more easier. And you don't know how many lives you can impact by doing that.
01:05:54
Speaker
You know, every person in my life, and it's hundreds of them, I wish people could see my family photo. They love me with no expectation. And it might not look like how they want it to look, but they love me because that's the way Christ loves us.
01:06:08
Speaker
You know? And so I mean, that that's what I want people to do because I mean, it's it's really no handbook to this. I think we try to teach people how to do it. um And I'm just learning even in this field work, when you're working with individuals who've experienced sex trafficking, we want them to live their life the way that we want them to.
01:06:29
Speaker
And we don't meet them right where they are. you know And so Casey's story is different than Josie's. Ori's story is different from Leah's. And Leah's story is different from Rebecca's. And Rebecca's story is different from Nisha's.
01:06:40
Speaker
And Nisha's story is different from Maui's. But my job is just to help get them there and get them on the path that God has called them to and God created for them. It is not my job to tell them what that looks like or even how to do it. It's just to help.
01:06:57
Speaker
walk alongside them and just be there. People just want somebody there and that's it. You can give your time. You have time. You have enough to over 24 hours in a day.
01:07:08
Speaker
You have enough time. And so was just about where do you place your priorities and where do you place how you want to serve? You know, and that's serving God's kingdom and that's helping other people. It's not that complicated. We make it complicated. Like all these curriculums and pillars on how you serve people, just love.
01:07:25
Speaker
But a lot of people don't have love in their heart in that way because they're still broken. They still have a lot of healing do themselves. You know, I've seen that. I'm in a I'm in the Bible Belt. I'm in Texas. And people love with the expectation.
01:07:38
Speaker
What has to look like this? And you got to be doing this to to be loving and serving the Lord. Or, you know, in order for you to be a part of this Bible study group to be loved on, you got to be a certain way. And it takes a journey for people to get there.
01:07:51
Speaker
I remember what was like smelling like marijuana. I remember what it was like high on drugs. I remember what it was like laying on my back and being raped. I remember those things. I remember what it's like for people look with disgust and not have hardly anything on and people judging me.
01:08:04
Speaker
And you know what somebody did? A male, a white male at that. When I got into that group home and I got off the streets and I would come out with provocative clothing and we would be going to transitional classes. He'd be like, uh-uh, you ain't wearing that. Go change your shirt.
01:08:17
Speaker
You can't get a job like that. Go put your clothes on. Like, and yeah, it was tough love, but it was love. It was like addressing it and not saying you can't go because you're dressed like that.
01:08:28
Speaker
It was like, this kid has just been sexually abused, sexually, like violently raped, Over and over again. Of course she would wear that. But you know what I'm going Teach her how to dress.
01:08:39
Speaker
And give her some examples. Not that hard. Instead of talking about people.
01:08:47
Speaker
Or just make it bigger than what it is. When it comes to that. and And so we have it we have a... I've seen it. I can't sit here and bluff to people and say, yeah, we're doing an amazing job and the in the sex trafficking field. I'm not going to that because a lot of times I sit in meetings with kids and what they're asking for, we're not giving.
01:09:06
Speaker
This kid is asking. They're telling you they don't want to be bounced around. They're telling you they want stability. They're telling you they want a home where they can be loved, where they want their picture on the wall and not see your whole family and not see their face. It's not that hard.
01:09:18
Speaker
you know? And so I can do that though, right? Because I've lived it. So I know what might be needed or how to interact with young boys or young girls or other adults and to be sensitive to certain stuff.
01:09:29
Speaker
But I still have to show up with my heart and not expect nothing either. and mean, that's the biggest thing. i don't i don't expect to be able to go to every graduation or to be able to be in that kid's life. and might It's going to be like, you don't always get the good end of the stick when you come in contact with somebody that have experienced sex trafficking. Like,
01:09:46
Speaker
and have lived through it, sometimes you get the bad in the stick. Like when they're fresh out, when they're angry, when they're hurt, you might not get the Ori that has done some of the healing process.
01:09:57
Speaker
So just stick with it, you know, love with no expectation, and just stay in it. Just stay in it and just be there because the right opportunity, I'm telling you,
01:10:10
Speaker
That time when I left my trafficker and Jim had to meet me at that Denny's, he could have said, Ori, I always come to this Denny. it This is the 26th time and you're never ready. Or he can say, you know what?
01:10:22
Speaker
Okay, Ori. And that was the day I wanted to go back. So don't close the door. You wouldn't do it on your kids. So it's the same thing. It's the same kind of love. Well, thank you, Ori, for your heart, your time, your um passion and and and insight.
01:10:39
Speaker
um where We're hoping that we're going to keep learning, ah to learn from this series and to keep learning after this series and and ways we can approach this. I like how you said, this is not ah even though going to have a study guide, even though we even though we have it, ah you know, this series, and there's no handbook to this, except maybe the closest one is um how Jesus told us to love.
01:11:05
Speaker
And we have a scripture for that, right? Yeah. Well, thank again. Thank you, Ori. And I pray that um everything goes well for you in Texas and and keeps on going well and we're praying for you and your, and your family and your daughter. And um thank you again.
01:11:20
Speaker
Thank you so much.
U.S. Institute Against Human Trafficking Initiatives
01:11:22
Speaker
Thank you for being with us on the Trafficking Free America podcast and in the season two of ah continuing and further discussion about our Advocate series.
01:11:32
Speaker
um If you have not heard of or don't not know where to download our Advocate series, please go to advocateseries.com. And you will find ah link to ultimately access all the videos, download our study guide.
01:11:45
Speaker
All this is for free. And we also put some additional resources on that website so that you can, as you deep dive into these episodes, you can and access our resources to kind of get a better idea on.
01:11:57
Speaker
um on educating yourself, getting some ideas on how you can get plugged into ultimately ah combating human trafficking if you feel inspired or you feel God calling you to to do more.
01:12:10
Speaker
The U.S. Institute Against Human Trafficking created this Advocate series to help educate the church so that they know a little bit better of an idea of how they can react differently. in a Christ-centered way on combating human trafficking. And one of the action steps we give is to is to actually become an abolitionist.
01:12:27
Speaker
When I say become an abolitionist, I mean by going to usiat.org slash abolitionist and signing up to be an abolitionist. It's our abolitionist project. It is ultimately a way for you to subscribe and receive resources. ah ah the most Every time on a daily basis, we're trying to create content and find more resources and more ways to rally and unite ah the church together and others together to combat human trafficking. And by signing up it as an abolitionist, you get resources right away from us to do that.
01:12:58
Speaker
But we also ask our abolitionists to get involved in one of three ways. It is to either help raise awareness. That could be anything from sharing things on social media, just continuing ah continually continually talking about this with your friends and family, those who are ah you can influence in your community, possibly even taking our tfc program our TFZ, Trafficking Free Zone Program.
01:13:22
Speaker
bringing that to businesses so that they can become TFC zone, ah trafficking free zones and ah may, or maybe taking this advocate series to churches or other, any group you want to, and, and helping raise awareness.
01:13:35
Speaker
Another way is to volunteer. If you want to volunteer, we have ah program. We have several programs at the U.S. s Institute Against Human Trafficking that you can actually um ah ah get involved in right away as a volunteer.
01:13:48
Speaker
But also, you know, this is a nationwide thing. And we are ah continually partnering with other organizations such as Safe Homes, foster care agencies that are in pregnancy centers, multiple places, multiple resources that are helping combat human trafficking or hoping helping the marginalized that really affect um, you know, those who are being groomed or brought into human trafficking.
01:14:11
Speaker
And so, uh, if you are, if your heart is to volunteer, if you want to spend your time doing that, we want to help get you plugged in. So by signing up as an abolitionist, and if you want to volunteer, you can actually schedule a consultation meeting.
01:14:23
Speaker
with our team at the U.S. Institute Against Human Trafficking to help get plugged in in the right way, like where where you're located, as well as your time, as well as your talents and skills and heart.
01:14:34
Speaker
We help try to partner you with the right right with the right organization to to start start getting involved. And the third aspect is helping raise raise funds. um You know, even making this advocate series is thousands of dollars, ah ah creating content and helping raise awareness on a continual basis costs a lot of money. These organizations that we're going to help you help plug you into.
01:14:57
Speaker
Everyone needs funds to help make this happen. um we are fighting a $150 billion dollars industry. And if we're coming in with with ah pennies compared to that, it's going to be a longer haul, right? It's going to be a harder fight and and it's going to take longer and there's going to be more victims.
01:15:15
Speaker
um Money is definitely not power, but money is and natural resource to help those who are being marginalized. This entire thing started with money and we can combat it with good.
01:15:27
Speaker
um If you have a talent for raising money, I want you to help us raise money. I want you to help fundraise, whether it's giving yourself, whether it's getting others rallied around this to give to the U.S. Institute Against Human Trafficking, or it's rallying around your local organization that you know is combating human trafficking and you can help them.
01:15:45
Speaker
Ultimately, we need you to help raise funds. Ignoring the fact that funds are a need is ignoring the fact that people are in need.
01:15:56
Speaker
These funds will help those people. And I want you to make sure I want to make sure you're researching. And if you want to talk to the U.S. Institute Against Human Trafficking to help make sure you're choosing a good organization that's truly putting you know their money where their mouth is, um that's another thing we're trying to help do.
01:16:13
Speaker
We're trying to weed out those who are doing good compared to those who are maybe just, you know, exploiting the fight against human trafficking, which is also real. So, guys, um thank you for listening to the to today's podcast. Again, if you're ready to get involved after watching the Advocate series, I encourage you to go to usiahd.org slash abolitionist and actually sign up.
01:16:37
Speaker
um And if you have not watched this advocate series, please go to advocate series.com and download and watch this five video series and then go and sign up to become an abolitionist because I promise you, um you're going to feel pulled into helping in any way possible.
01:17:00
Speaker
Thank you.