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True Lies
28 Plays11 months ago
This week Kelley and Jordan go over, "True Lies." In this episode Jordan enters his late 20s, they laugh about the antics in the hotel, and agree that Helen is not very smart.
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Transcript
The Realities of Turning Late 20s
00:00:00
Speaker
hello hello what can i say you think you're iconic the movie clock has and i'm in my late 20s now yes he is yeah i finally joined the club welcome welcome yeah yeah yeah it's not bad i promise then debatable yeah
00:00:26
Speaker
I mean, hey, nothing, nothing totally drastic happens in your like late 20s. Like you don't get like another brain development or something or something grows in last minute. So at least there was that. Yeah. Just your body's going to start breaking down. Hey, yo. It's okay though. How was your week Kelly? That's all right. Um, short week.
Holiday Work Struggles
00:00:54
Speaker
uh because of the holiday um but can can i just say to all corporations out there like i don't care what your focus is what kind of business you are um if uh if um a holiday happens on a thursday gift friday off yeah good friday off gift friday off because why are we here after we just met the entire day drinking
00:01:21
Speaker
Right. Also, 80% of your company is going to be gone anyway. Yeah, just give people the extra day off. Don't be so fucking stenchy. Yeah, and the rest of the population will also be nursing whatever they had the day before. Yeah, plus, you know, people are going to be doing fireworks until like midnight, like people aren't getting any sleep, please. Yeah, no, no, no, no, no. And people will we didn't go past midnight. We had some randomly going off at like 1am and I'm dog sitting my brother's dog and just yapping. And I'm like, please, I have to wake up at like six, let me live. So yeah, just, just give people Friday off. just I mean, I'm saying all this as if I didn't take that entire week off, but, but yeah, give people, give people the day off. Please. Also, can we start giving a Christmas Eve off?
00:02:19
Speaker
Or the, or the day after Christmas off, please. Yeah. One or the other. One or the other. Cause I did have to work on Christmas Eve last year. Yeah. I worked on Christmas Eve and I worked the day. how fucking ghetto that is And then I had to go to the store after that to go get some stuff. yeah And of course it was crowded yeah because everybody else had to work Christmas Eve. Just a mess. Yeah.
00:02:46
Speaker
Or if you don't want to give all of Christmas Eve off, give us a half day. A half day. Give us a half day. I promise you we'll be happier. Yes.
Weather Preferences and Social Outings
00:02:58
Speaker
Give us this bullshit. Right. Also, can we get the day before Thanksgiving off so we can prepare for Thanksgiving? right Prep is so serious. Because now you have us staying up all night cooking. Yeah. Because we after we just had to work all day, like, come on. See, the thing is, my mom and I, we ah yeah we would still, even working the day before Thanksgiving, we would still be like, yeah, let's just chop some veg and like get just the basic things together so that we like tomorrow morning at like 6 a.m., we can just start throwing things where they need to go and start turning burners and ovens on so we can get things going. And um and I'd be like, yeah, sure.
00:03:43
Speaker
Cause you gotta to get, cause I swear, you you can never have enough prep time for for Thanksgiving. No. You can never have too much. Especially if you're a if you are a meat eating family and you need to cook a giant ass turkey. that You know how long it takes for those things to fucking defrost? And then you need all that time for it to sit with um whatever you stuff it with, whatever you rub it with. It's gotta sit. Your spices. Right. That's a whole like two day process. Oh, absolutely. Absolutely. So y'all, y'all, y'all gotta to fit and figure yourself out. Yeah. You need to start giving us some buffer time. Right. they da Day before Thanksgiving and either day before or day after Christmas. Preferably both, but yeah. Especially for those people who travel for Christmas, like giving them a day, giving them a day after Christmas.
00:04:39
Speaker
Yeah, but yeah, anything else happened this week? kelly Um, I don't think so. I, I, um, I'm currently dog sitting my brother's dog. He is in New York city right now. Um, and you know what? So I'm glad we pick our battles because at least I wasn't dealing with 104 degree heat with however many percent of humidity.
00:05:10
Speaker
At least I was dealing with dry heat and a hundred something and I will take a dry heat over a humidity any day of the week. Yeah. Yeah. that That one day it was humid when I was out there with you. I wanted to kill myself. Yeah. That was actually awful. And the humidity wasn't even that high. It wasn't even that bad. And I still want to kill myself. Yeah. Yeah. It's it's rough. I don't know what it is, but it's it's rough. So yeah, he's, he's been dealing with that that triple degree heat with the humidity. And I'm like, he's like, yeah, um, we are going out and doing this and then we're going to go out to Philly and blah, blah, blah. And I'm just all like, Hmm, then you're going to walk around and all that heat all that heat. I am like, I'm sad that it didn't go. Cause I really would have loved to go, but at the same time, like.
00:06:03
Speaker
Yeah, I don't know how I would be dealing with all of that sweating. See, I just do not like heat. And I say that as if we didn't just have a week-long heat wave that made me want to scream every single day. But that's neither here nor there. I'm happy it's almost over. Oh, is it almost over for you guys? Yeah, I think today is our last day of it being like hot, hot. Oh, good. You know, last night when I was, okay, I guess I was talking about my week. So, um, last night I went out with my cousins. We went to this old, that if you were here around last summer, you know, there is a old folks hangout that happens during the summer. So my cousins forced me to go, even though I didn't want to go, because my mom literally is not here.
00:07:00
Speaker
So there was like kind of no reason for me to go. Plus I don't have any money and I have a trip next week. okay um so i was at the thats next week So I was like, um, yeah, they texted me. They were like, you go into this. I was like, first off, I didn't know that was happening second off. No, I don't have any money. so no i will not be So no, I will not be going. And they were like, who, who said you had to spend any money? And I was like, Um, you have to spend money when you get to the door, like it's like cover traffic. Like I'm not coming in. Um, and then eventually I was like, if I don't have to spend a single dime, I will come. Right. Um, I did have to spend a single dime, but so we'll talk about that later. Okay. So they were like, yeah, we'll, we'll pay for everything. Just come. And I was like, cool, cool, cool, whatever.
00:07:53
Speaker
I had to pay the $5 cover charge. But everything everything else they paid for. it They paid for all my drinks. There was a food truck outside. So in quesadillas, I literally just finished my quesadilla from last night. um They paid they pay for my quesadilla. Um, yeah, it was really crowded and it was 68 degrees. Oh, it was 68? At night. It was, I was sweating. My cousin Brady had brought a fan and I literally stole it. I was like, I can't do this. Dang. It was 68 degrees at like nine o'clock at night. I was dying.
00:08:38
Speaker
But yeah, uh, we hung out my cousin's banner, whatever was performing. Uh, it was getting close to 11 and I was like, yo, I hate to go feed my dog. Like my dogs haven't eaten yet. I was like, can I go? Luckily, luckily they like finished their set around 11. And I was trying to get up and leave, but they just kept wanting to talk and take photos and stuff. And I was like, I want to go release me. And I was eventually able to go. yeah So yeah.
Simple Celebrations and Travel Plans
00:09:10
Speaker
Um, if you don't know anything about me, I like to go home i yeah jordan will go home. I, I want to go home. Look, I was tired. It was hot. I was like, I just want to go home. But yeah. Um, but I kind of had fun. It was, it was okay. That's good. Um, and then for, I had the like most low key birthday I think I've ever had. Do you compare it to like 2020?
00:09:40
Speaker
but does I don't even remember what I did for my birthday that year. I feel like I did something, but I... I didn't do anything for that birthday. I feel like I did something that year. This year I really didn't do anything. Like, everyone was gone. Yeah. So I literally just went over to my aunt's house, went swimming, and then ordered barbecue. Like, that's all I did. Yeah. And then my mom left me a key lime pie in the fridge. Like, that's... That was my birthday. That was how I ushered in the year 27. And this is how your birthday will be every... No, it's kidding. No, it won't. um And the only reason why my birthday was so calm is because I elected to not do anything for my birthday so that I could afford to go to Florida next week. ye So, yeah. Everyone stay tuned.
00:10:41
Speaker
In two weeks, you will learn how that trip went. Shenanigans will be head. Shenanigans will be head. I will Shenan again, again, and again. beautiful I Shenan and Shenan again, again, again, and again and again, again, again. um I found out that there is a Margaritaville where we are going. Margaritaville. And I will be at my Margaritaville bag. Love that for you. If y'all don't remember what happened the last time I went to Margaritaville, when I was in l LA, a time will be had. But yeah, um that's it for me. Okay, Kelly, you can go ahead and tell us about our movie this week.
The German Party Spy Mission
00:11:29
Speaker
Yay. Okay. So this week we are talking about true lies. So we start this movie.
00:11:41
Speaker
um by saying that a fancy party is happening at some heavily guarded mansion in Germany. ah We do see that someone is breaking into the estate by swimming under the frozen pool or something like that. sure and He ends up in a pool or like some type of moat thing. He has to like break through a gate that's in water. Okay, yeah. Yeah, yeah um the man then gets out of the pool, sneaks to the pool house, checks in with the rest of his team before changing and sneaking into the mansion. Harry, the the man who had snuck in, sees his target, sneaks through to the upstairs and out and then back up to the third floor before sticking a modem onto the computer and leaving it for, what is his name? Faisal.
00:12:39
Speaker
ah to download and decrypt the files that are on the computer. Only a white man would be able to walk into a party like that and no one would question anything. Yeah. Like no one asked for a ticket. Nobody was like, who is that man? He just went in there, started talking to people and they were just like, okay. And they just left to go do whatever he was doing. Yeah. And he was saying hi to random people and even they were like, I don't know. Yeah. who are you but just kept talking to him anyway. I was just like, what's going on? Like, I mean, I would do the same because it's a polite thing, but like not everyone is going to be like, Oh yeah, bro. Hey. Yeah. No one was like, who are you? but It was really weird. and No one did the other polite thing of like, Hey, I'm sorry, man. What's your name? What's your name? You must be new here. What's your name? you know Like, yeah, I've never seen you at one of these things before.
00:13:37
Speaker
Um, but as Harry leaves third floor, he runs into one of the security guards and they are notified of his presence. And he then runs into Juno Skinner, who is an antiques dealer. ah The guards see the broken ice in the pool outside and start to look for Harry, and he starts to dance as Juno so that he can kind of hide. Once the files are decrypted and the dance is over, Harry makes his exit but not before getting Juno's card. As he leaves, one of the guards finally asks for his invitation, and instead of trying to sneak away, he blows up a car as a distraction instead.
00:14:19
Speaker
The guards then chase after Harry as his crew raises to meet up with him, and they all eventually make it back to DC. That night, he is given information um to be Harry Tasker before being dropped out of house, and Harry Tasker is his... It's not like a cover or anything, that's who he is, right? Yeah, that's like his like real identity. That's his real identity. Yeah, he's, gear he's like giving his wallet back, his passport, his wedding ring, stuff like that. How does he not have a tan line from constantly taking off his wedding ring? No idea. Okay. Okay. Um, the next day, Harry and his wife, Helen are getting ready for work, but he's not really paying attention to her. He's just like, Oh no, yeah, that's great, honey. And just like keeps moving throughout his day.
00:15:13
Speaker
Albert shows up to Harry's house and shows him a new pair of spy glasses and he sees his daughter Dana stealing um Money from Albert, but she rides off On one of her friend's bikes before he was able to to stop her these parents are failing her Yes, we learned that she is both stealing and riding on the back of some random guy's motorcycle and she's only 14 So who is this man? that has a motorcycle. Right. Who is he? Why is no one asking any questions? like We would have had a problem. we We would have had a problem. If I couldn't catch her while she was leaving, I damn sure would have caught her as god but or at school. Yeah. but No, because I'm not letting my daughter ride off on ah on some random man's bike. Yeah. What's going on? cause she Because she has a helmet, so clearly she's done it enough times to be like, oh, yeah, let me just get a helmet.
00:16:09
Speaker
No. And I'm gonna cuss out my wife and I'm like, did you know about this? And why didn't you tell me? Yeah. Because it doesn't look like you're handling it. You could have called me like, you could have called me. So the two then head into work. And as they head into their building, they are checked before being let into the Omega sector, which is their last, the last line of defense for the US, I guess. ah Harry, Albert, and Faisal explain their mission to their boss and try to justify their actions of the whole firefight and almost getting caught and stuff like that um by saying that they have information about a potential terrorist. um ah Helen then complains to a co-worker about Harry and his sales job. She just thinks he's a regular Joe and he's just making
00:17:02
Speaker
something out of nothing, basically, because he's just a sales rep, he doesn't do anything exciting.
00:17:10
Speaker
um Albert and Faisal think that Juno um is more than just um Khalid's and antique dealer, and Khalid is the potential um terrorist that they were talking about. um and he And they think that she's just more than his antique dealer. So they set up a meeting And ah Harry goes to Juneau's office, and he learns that she deals with a few countries from the Middle East. She gets shipments in from them. She deals with a lot of antiques going in and out. And Harry's there under the guise that he's looking for a statement piece for a new office in San Francisco. After getting the information he needs, one of Dana's coworkers comes as Harry leaves.
00:18:00
Speaker
and berates her in her office saying that she is under surveillance, why is she bringing some random guy into the office? He slapped the shit out of her. Yeah, twice. Like, no. And she just took it. She did. I would have been pissed. The first one? They must truly be paying her a lot of money. Oh, absolutely. Because who be slapped like that and not and barely even react? Like the amount of anger that would have started festering out. You hit me. My reaction is to hit you. sir So that first hit, I would have had to hit you back. And if I didn't hit you after the first hit, I would have hit you after the second one because the second one was not needed. It was not needed. That was overkill. um But yeah, he says that she might be under surveillance. And so she needs to be more kept more careful about um telling the details of their work.
00:18:56
Speaker
Later that day, Harry gets a call from Helen and he promises to be home by eight because it is his birthday. And Helen and Dana are putting in a lot of effort to throw him a little party at home. But on his way home, he finds that he is being tailed and is going to be a little late. So he makes sure to call Helen and be like, hey, running running a few minutes late, but don't worry about it.
00:19:21
Speaker
um Harry then Harry and Albert then park the car and Harry gets some of the men following them to meet him in um a bathroom of one of the local malls.
00:19:35
Speaker
Albert then calls Helen, oh yeah, to tell her that Harry will be late and realizes that um there was a third guy in the car that was tailing them and he isn't there anymore, so he has to get out and chase him. In the bathroom, Harry fights off two of the goons when the third guy from the car shows up. um After fighting for a little bit, the third man runs away and Harry chases him as Albert tries to catch up. The man then steals a motorcycle and Harry steals an officer's horse to follow and gives instructions to the other officers to cut him off. Harry on a horse and this man on a motorcycle go through a hotel. They do. A car park that leads into another hotel.
00:20:22
Speaker
into an elevator yeah and up to the top floor or one of the top floors. I love action movie antics because why were they doing all of this and barely anyone was even caring unlessing the aunt unless they were coming directly at them. Right. The only people who cared really were um the older couple in the elevator with the horse. Yeah. And even then they weren't acting like, oh my gosh, why is there a horse in here? They're like, oh my gosh, there's a horse in here again. Like that's how they were acting. Like what kind of life are y'all living where like a horse comes in and you're like, oh, here we go again. Mention something to him. yeah Tell him to move the horse or something. They told us last time there would be no more horses. Right. We can never come back to this Marriott.
00:21:15
Speaker
But yeah, once the two reach the top of the building, the man races off the building and lands in one of the adjacent building's pools. um Harry then tries to go do the same with his horse, but the horse is like, nah, I'm good. but stops right before the end. the horse was like is ridiculous yeah' like anxious right and was not built for this um And Harry is um flung off and is hanging off the side of the building by the the horse's reins. Harry eventually convinces the horse to back up to bring him back up um onto to the hotel. Harry then eventually makes it home late and sees that Helen has stayed up
00:21:59
Speaker
for his birthday and apologizes, which she accepts, by the way. The next day at work, Harry goes through some photos and finds the man that he was chasing, who is Salim Abu Aziz, who was a known terrorist, um also known as the Sand Spider. um While they're out and about, Harry decides to drop in on Helen to see if she wants to go have lunch. And before she knows that he is there, he overhears um his wife take a phone call from someone named Simon. And but from the banter that she has with excuse ah with her coworker, ah he thinks that his wife is having an affair and he is devastated. I don't know why these men who are never home ah shock are shocked when they find out that their wife is cheating on them.
00:22:55
Speaker
I'm just like, well, you kind of like, I don't think cheating is good. Like don't ever cheat on your partner, but like, why are you shocked that your partner went somewhere else for solace and comfort when you're never not there? Right. Right. This doesn't make sense to me. Yeah, no, just cheating. Cheating is never the answer, by the way, because it takes a lot in my mind. It takes a lot to get to the point where I'm like, yeah, let me cheat on my on my partner. If I ever got to that point, I'm like, I'm leaving. Like, why am I? Yeah, no. And that's what I'm saying. Like, it it feels like it would take a lot. So at that point, I would have been like, yeah, I'm no longer happy in this relationship. Yeah, I need to leave. I need to leave. And like, if you can't even work it out with them, then yeah, y'all need to jelly to leave. Yeah.
00:23:49
Speaker
Because why are y'all staying in relationships that don't make you happy? I don't know. People are weird. and so In certain instances, I understand. Like um abusive relationships, it's hard to leave those either because you don't know or because it's too scary to leave. I understand that. But like if it's just a regular relationship and you don't see your significant other or like they don't treat you right, whatever. Why are you cheating to get back? Just leave them. I have no idea. Just leave them. It's easier. I personally never understood cheating, but you know that. Me neither. me neither because you're so you supposedly love your partner and then you're just gonna be like yeah let me hurt them yeah weird i'm sorry um anyway um harry meets back up with albert and albert clearly isn't helping the situation because he's been married multiple times and cheated on multiple times um and he's like yeah dude that's that's just what happens and he gives him the reality check of you are never home so
00:24:51
Speaker
You know? Yeah. Just accept it. Which is is rough, but like Harry, Harry should have known. Nowadays, he would have given him the advice, just have an open relationship. Right. And then Harry would have been pissed because he's not getting any. and then Which by the way, don't ever, if I'm in a relationship, don't ever even try to bring that up. I will immediately dump you. I'm out. I'm out. Because no. Right. What's the point of us being in a relationship? Right. I got into this thinking this is going to be monogamous. Yeah. Don't be, don't be changing things on me. An open relationship is an oxymoron to me, but you know. and True. Whatever. To each their own. That's not, that's not for me. Yeah. That's, that's not my, that's not how I want to do it, but that's okay. If it works for you, it works for you. It works for you. That's great.
Suspicions and Spy Antics
00:25:52
Speaker
That night at dinner Harry is clearly upset that his wife is having an affair and brings up the fact that he tried to see her for lunch and she spouts some kind of lie about a work issue and he's just not impressed. That was such a terrible lie. It really was. There was something about her needing to print something but their printer wasn't working and then she went up to another floor and they didn't have the right paper or something and so she had to go across town to get the right paper. I was like girl You could have just said you had a meeting or something. Like, why did you have to do this long winded lie that didn't make any sense? Right. Like the we've said this before, cheating. I'm not cheating. Lying has to have this a little bit of truth in it. Yeah. Just a little bit. Not too much. Don't give too many details. Yeah. Don't give too many details. Be as general as possible, but don't but include just a tidbit of truth in there. that's Okay.
00:26:52
Speaker
Don't be coming up with some nine page lie about something. It will be pulled apart very quickly.
00:27:01
Speaker
um The next day at work, Harry wants to wire Helen's cell phone and the house phone, which Albert is immediately against, but he does it anyway. Once he gets the transcripts of her phone calls, Harry reads through their conversations and finds that she is meeting Sam for lunch again the next day. Simon. Simon, sorry, am i but my My bad, my bad, my bad. I mixed up some of the names in here. I don't know what happened to me. Um, at home that night, he tries to schedule lunch with her, but she declines. And, um, immediately after Harry steals her purse, who throws it down to Albert and he adds a GPS tracker and a mic to it.
00:27:48
Speaker
The next day, Harry and Albert follow her. and find that she is getting lunch in Chinatown. Helen meets with Simon who is a very jumpy man and who is essentially pretending to be Harry. he's He says he's a spy and the incident that happened with the guy with the motorcycle that was published in the papers and he claims that that was him. yeah yeah um but Yeah, but Helen is into it. She's very into it. She's very into it. Like, yes, I will help you. She's also dumb as fuck because he's like, yeah, he's like, we need to go to Paris for an op. And I'm like, does the US government not have any female spies? Like, why would you a random woman need to go with this man to Paris for an operation? Right.
00:28:41
Speaker
make it make it make sense so would who would approve that putting a civilian in in harm's way have you ever been to his like hq have you met his like boss anyone else or is it just him weird weird he's also way too jumpy to be a spy yeah he's so jumpy he keeps like kind of annoying he keeps like jumping at everything and i'm just like Yeah, a spy would be this jumpy. Yes, he would. Of course. Of course. I'm surprised he didn't pull the out we need to sit in the corner booth and I have to have my back to the wall so that I can. Yeah, surveillance. So I can see everything that's going on. Right.
00:29:25
Speaker
um
00:29:28
Speaker
After their meeting, ah we then watch as Simon drives in his fancy car to a used car dealership where he is actually a the dealer of it, of the used car dealership. Yeah, <unk>ship yeah he's a he's a car salesman. He's a car salesman. It's like noble profession. Get your bag, sir. yeah Yeah, he's a used car salesman. So like kind of sketchy, but you know, yeah, very sketchy. um So Harry goes and talks with Simon, um who tries to sell him the car that he was just driving before that.
00:30:09
Speaker
And Harry learns that Simon has an angle on getting women and he tells them that he's helping these women with their fantasy for either excitement, danger, whatever, because they are married to boring men. He's such a fucking liar. because we find out how he found Helen. It's like, she never approached you. yet No, you approached her you approached her. And even then it was a very lame excuse. Yeah. But also Helen is kind of dumb for for actually going along with it. Helen is the dumbest woman on the fucking planet.
00:30:54
Speaker
Because if that was me, I would have been like, i would like he would have left the the case at my table and I would have been like, great. And I would have just left it there or went to like a hostess and been like, yeah, a man forgot his bag. A man forgot his bag. He might come back for it. I'm sure he'll come back for it. Yeah. So if you could just, yeah, hold it or something, I don't know. um Harry then gets Simon to admit that Helen is seeing him and the more he describes her, the more he wants to kill him, which is fair. Surprised he didn't. Yeah, right. Right. After the whole interaction with Simon, Albert hides information from Harry that Helen is seeing Simon that night and Harry's immediately rushing to go and find her.
00:31:48
Speaker
and gets other agents to show up to. He calls them off of whatever they're doing. He's like, hey, we need you for this. We need you, yeah. Right. and Helen then shows up to the spot. um When Simon shows up and takes her with him and surveillance tracks them to where they're going. Simon takes her to a quote unquote safe spot outside of the city. And there he tells her that he needs her to be his fake wife. and to go with him to Paris, but she initially does not know if she wants to do it. Harry and his team then get suited up as Helen agrees to go to the Paris trip and Simon makes a move on her so that they can be more convincing with their intimacy. yeah ah He starts to feel her up, but she changes her mind and starts to fight back as Harry and his team show up.
00:32:46
Speaker
he couldt anything He could have went into that more gracefully. he was kind of He was just like immediately when she sat down, he was like, we need to be as close as possible. And then tries to make out with her. And she's like, oh, oh yeah. And she's being like very reserved. She's like, i don't I don't think we should do that. And then he just pushes further and jumps on top of her. And I was just like, dude, can you not read the room? like She was not into it. No. Yeah. She was, she was kind of into it. And then immediately she was like, I'm good. Actually. No, no, no, no, no. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's like, no, no, no, no. Um, so when they burst in Harry cuff Simon and Helen tries to get away, but he manages to catch her. Helen is brought to a secured room somewhere and interviewed by Harry and Albert. Um, and they're using some voice modulator.
00:33:45
Speaker
um And she explains how she met Simon, which was through the Chinese restaurant as he pretended to be chased by authorities that had shown up at the restaurant um and what she was doing at the hideout. And then he starts to ask some personal questions about her family life. um She then admits that she wanted to feel alive and needed to be trusted and special and blah, blah, blah. And that's why she was willing to go with Simon.
00:34:16
Speaker
After that, she isn't asked if she has had sex with Simon, and after being asked multiple times, she loses it and almost breaks the security glass between the two of them. It's like, I had not had sex with him. No, because I get it. Why are you asking me so many times with only the one word changing? Just take my answer, bro.
00:34:45
Speaker
um When asked if she loves her husband, she says that she does love her husband and she will always love her husband. Harry then impromptu decides to give her an assignment to help spice up her life. Helen is then taken back to her car after being given the instruction that she will be called and she will go under the name of Doris. And if she tells um anybody about it, her family will be in danger, blah, blah, blah.
00:35:16
Speaker
And so she decides to keep her mouth shut. Simon is then intimidated by Harry and Albert and basically humiliated and just left to wherever they they brought him out to. um The next night, Harry asks about um Helen's night last night because she says that she got a flat tire and that's why she was like coming home the other night. And when he asks about it, she gets super nervous yeah and does an absolute worst job of hiding it when the phone rings with information for Doris to go to a hotel and get ah an envelope from reception and to dress sexy. Once at the hotel, Albert gives her further instruction on her mission, which is to pretend to be a prostitute to impress a guy and bug the room before leaving.
00:36:17
Speaker
on the way to the room, Helen destroys her outfit and changes her look to make it more sexy, which it works. Yeah, because they told her to show up sexy as she brought like an 80s prom dress. And I was just like, girl. Yeah, ruffles and all and like the the this the big shoulders. The big shoulder thing. Yeah. Yeah. I do like the slick back hair. That was a nice touch. Yeah. But like, who are you? Who are you sitting with that dress? Yeah, right, the first one no one. No one is going to look at you twice for all of you if you show up like that.
00:36:56
Speaker
Once inside the room, Helen is told what to do by Harry, who is sitting in a dark corner using a recording from one of his colleagues ah who is speaking to her with a French accent so he can hide who he is. um She is then instructed to do a strip tease and then
00:37:18
Speaker
like dances or something. Yeah. This was one of the only times I've ever seen Jamie Lee Curtis as hot, but an a but then they immediately ruined it by having her fall. And I was just like, yeah yeah yeah yeah Jamie Lee Curtis is always going to Jamie Lee Curtis. I was like, there, there is a movie fact about that. I will say, okay, great. Um, But yeah, she doesn't dance along the bed and along the way she drops the bug that she's supposed to be using. So she has to like try and get that back. And Harry is so distracted by the whole thing, he doesn't notice. And he drops the tape recorder that he's using. Eventually, he tells her to get on the bed and close your eyes. And distracted, he tries to kiss her and she fights back. Because she's like, hey, yo, this was just supposed to be a you watch thing. You were like, no touchy.
00:38:15
Speaker
Not that you do, not that you do. While she is trying to leave the room, a bunch of men enter the room looking for Harry, and she's like, no, no, no, wait, wait, wait. They're looking for me. Because she still believes that her whole mission thing is is real. Right. She's like, no, you're he's not the one you want. It's me. Yeah, because she does eventually see that it is Harry and she's like, yo, no, he's just a salesman. I'm the one here who is actually working with the government. yeah
00:38:48
Speaker
um Both of them are then taken to an airport where Juno is there to meet Harry and they are both taken on a plane.
The Terrorist Threat and Comic Misadventures
00:38:56
Speaker
Harry tries to get Helen out of the whole thing by saying she's just some random woman that he met, but Helen- Won't shut the fuck up. She won't. She just keeps yapping and being like, no, no, no, no. He's my husband. Like, check my locket that I got. We've we've got a daughter. Here's some pictures. Just dumb as hell. I was like, stop talking. Right. Just be quiet. At that point, let them take her husband, get off the plane and call the police or something. Like, I don't-
00:39:26
Speaker
I don't understand, girl.
00:39:29
Speaker
um But she doesn't let Helen go, and she just knocks Harry and Helen out. um They both end up at a site where Selim is there waiting for them, and Juno shows them what she calls the four horsemen, um which are made up antiques that are actually hiding crates of nuclear bombs.
00:39:53
Speaker
Which, when asked, Harry does confirm that they are nukes.
00:39:59
Speaker
Helen is in shock by his admission that he is a spy, and she just immediately punches him because she's all like, you've been lying to me. I can't believe this. You've been going out and doing all this stuff. It's not the time or the place, Helen. Yeah, that's actually not the time or place either. I know you're going through a lot right now, Helen, but I need you to lock in. and need you to Focus on the real problem in the moment. Yeah, we're just getting out of here alive.
00:40:29
Speaker
Salim and his crew then take footage of ah Harry confirming that they are nukes and Salim gives a passionate speech about striking back at America but during the whole recording the camera dies. And so they have to go find another one as one of the other men find the GPS tracker that was hidden in Helen's bag that is currently being used by um Albert and the crew before being destroyed.
00:40:59
Speaker
Juno then takes Harry and Helen to be interrogated interrogated and he is drugged with some type of truth serum.
00:41:08
Speaker
Once it kicks in, Helen asks questions about his job, if he's killed people, blah, blah, blah. You know, just everyday things. Just everyday things, of course. ah The man eventually comes back and Harry tells him that he is going to kill him and the guard inside the room. But the guy's like, bro, your handcuffs, you can't do anything. He's all like, you mean these handcuffs? um He has broken out of them and he does kill the two guys in the room. Harry and Helen then sneak around the grounds as they are chased. And as they are chased, Harry is able to kill those around him. Selim is then hyping up his men with another inspiring speech. And Harry translates and basically says that the bomb will be set off in 90 minutes on some remote island in Florida. And then after that, they'll they'll be going to more major cities.
00:42:05
Speaker
before um The bomb is sealed in cement, which I don't... I don't see the point, but that's okay. Yeah, don't either.
00:42:18
Speaker
um Harry then gives Helen a gun for protection as he quietly makes his way towards Celine. I think giving someone who doesn't know how to use a gun a gun, it's hilarious because... Yeah. How are they safer now? They're they're not. They're really not. As somebody who um was that person who was handed a gun and been like, let me let me show you how to shoot. I literally like held it. I'm like, is this right? Is this okay? And then you never you never realize how much recoil is on a gun until you shoot it. I've never held a gun in my life. I wouldn't know. Oh, well, yeah, sure. But I, I am a small girl. But I got tired after shooting.
00:43:03
Speaker
maybe 20, 20 rounds of just a handgun. Oh, yeah, I got tired. Because like all of that shooting through my arms for the first time was like, I don't know what's going on.
00:43:19
Speaker
um But eventually Harry is being held at gunpoint and tells Helen to shoot. And when she does she drops it And it automatically goes off as it falls down the stairs, miraculously taking everyone out but her and Harry.
00:43:39
Speaker
We see that another nuke is put on a helicopter um and is taken off as Harry continues to fight off the goons. Selim then shoots a rocket launcher at Harry and thinks he has taken him out but he has jumped into the water for safety.
00:43:58
Speaker
Gina then finds Helen and takes her with them as a hostage and Harry just watches all of them go.
00:44:06
Speaker
Everyone leaves the grounds and are headed toward Miami as Albert and the crew arrive a little while later. Harry is rescued and tells the guys what's going on once he is on one of the helicopters and they immediately get to work um alerting local authorities and trying to bring in any reinforcements that they can. Two fighter jets then show up and fire on the trucks carrying the heavy ammunition. The trucks are taken out and Helen at the same time tries to fight Juno for the gun that she has, which kills the driver accidentally. This was so hilarious to me because first off, what's the name of that evil woman? Juno. Juno. Half of her screen time is her getting slapped.
00:44:53
Speaker
It really is. Secondly, they are in a runaway car at this point and they're still fighting. and i'm like can yeah Can we pause this for a second? right Can we deal with the fact that your driver is dead? Yeah, the car is still moving. let and we're on a bra like maybe Let's Right. And we're swerving from side to side. Maybe let's ah stop really quick. I was like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Yeah. we can pick Truth. In this moment, let's start. Let's stop the car. And then we can continue you this fight after we stop the car. Right. Right. Right. Like, let's put the gun in a neutral space. yeah Let's both keep our hands in the air as we go to the front, take the guy out, guy out park the gas, and we can get out and we can duke it out.
00:45:37
Speaker
Yeah, we can do like a little steal the bacon to see who gets the gun and then I'll totally fight you. Yeah. But in this moment, priorities guys right but at this moment we will both die. So let's just, yeah let's focus on what we've done first. Yeah, they're a little too locked in on this fight.
00:46:00
Speaker
um But Helen is eventually able to take out Juno. and Harry gets the helicopter down towards the limo and is able to get Helen out right before the cart is about to go over the bridge and Juno wakes up right in that moment and they just end up in the water. yeah Everyone is then taken to a safe spot as they wait for the nuke to go off and Harry and Helen kiss as they go off. That kiss looked awkward. I'm sorry, it looked like they did not want to kiss each other.
00:46:33
Speaker
they didt And I love that for them. But also, this is a movie like show us some passion. Right? Like you just had the adrenaline rush of your life. Climb that man like a tree. yeah What's going on here? Right. Is this what the point where we actually find out you actually aren't attracted to your husband? Like, is that the deal?
00:46:59
Speaker
Um, but Harry is then immediately called back to work and is told that Selim is meeting with other radicals. Um, and they find out that Dana has been taken hostage. No one was, so but no one was watching data. right No one, no one could track on the girl. No one was like, Hey, send an agent, bring her into the office or just stay with her at the night. I watched a 14 year old girl. No, they were just like, she'll be okay. Leave her alone. They're like, yeah, there's, there's probably leftovers in the fridge. Just, you know, totally make sure the door's locked. At the very minimum, there's some cereal in there. Right. Right. And if not, I, she always, she always knows where the money is. I leave some on the counter for her. Yeah, she'll be good.
00:47:45
Speaker
Harry then hijacks one of the jets to get to Salim in time. Salim is in a, um, a building in the middle of Miami, um watching as his... And he watches as his demands and the footage of the nuke going off are streamed to every news source. um A news team then shows up at Celine's request and it is Faisal as part of the the team that is sent up.
00:48:27
Speaker
As Salim is live on TV, the broadcaster notices that the detonator doesn't have the key that he had mentioned in his speech and Salim finds that Dana has stolen it and she runs away. Also, broadcaster bro, why why would you do that? Why would you mention that what they needed to set the bomb off? is Yeah, that's weird. How would you even know that? i right That's so weird. He's secretly part of the team. Yeah. Like there's no other explanation about that. He's secretly a spy. He's secretly a terrorist.
00:49:02
Speaker
Selim then chases Dana to the roof and chases chases her up and out onto one of the cranes on the tower as they try to negotiate with one another. She's like, don't shoot me because if you shoot me, I'm gonna drop the key. So like, let's just figure this out. Hear me out. Hear me out. Like we harry can do this together. Yeah, we can work this out. Harry then shows up and takes out an entire floor of terrorists and then heads up to the roof where Dana is hanging off of the crane. And as he tries to like get her to jump onto his jet, um their helicopter from earlier starts to shoot at him. Harry eventually convinces Dana to drop down onto the jet and Selene does the same.
00:49:53
Speaker
Harry tries to get Dana into the cockpit, Esalim attacks him, and he is eventually hit to the back of the jet, but finds that his gun that he was holding earlier is latched on to the jet still and is able to get it into his hands. I will say that I know nothing about how jets work, but it kind of seemed like this jet was like defying the laws of physics. Right. Right. Yeah, I don't like, can can they just chill like that? Yeah, can they just hover? Like I've seen some videos of them like kind of hovering for a second and then moving but just to hover like that. Like for an extended amount of time they could just do that? Yeah and but and it's not like Harry's like doing like circles or anything he's literally just like- In one spot. In one spot kind of going back and forth a little bit. Yeah. Someone let us know. Yeah someone who has flown a jet before could you please confirm or deny? Yeah confirm or deny. You don't have to get too into it because like
00:50:53
Speaker
Right. Just a simple yes or no, and maybe a little explanation if you want. Yeah. Keep keep it simple though. like yeah Science was not my my biggest forte. Me neither. I was an art curley. I was an English and arts curley. I was a history boy. Yeah. So um once Salim has his gun back, um he tries to shoot at Harry. Um, but Harry notices him on the back and makes, um, emotion at ah Dana to hold on and Harry, uh, immediately just, uh, what, what's it like? He immediately turns the plane so that Celine can move his footing and he somehow gets stuck onto one of the missiles on the jet. And Harry's just like, hi, and fires the, the missile and hits the helicopter that was shooting at him.
00:51:53
Speaker
Yep. Harry then lands the jet in the middle of town and comforts Dana.
00:52:01
Speaker
A year later, the family is having dinner when Harry and Helen get instructions on their next mission.
A New Spy Partnership
00:52:07
Speaker
We then see the two who are at a party looking for their target, and they see that Simon is there and they decide to gang up on him, which, yeah, go ahead. Yeah. After scaring Simon off, the two start to tango and Albert tries to give them information about their mission, but they aren't listening anymore. I'm going to be real with you. I hate when they make, when they do these ah spy movies with like one person in the relationship who's a spy and the other one's just a red colored person. And then at the end of the movie, they both end up spies. I kind of hate that trope. Yeah. i think it would let them be normal I think it's ridiculous.
00:52:48
Speaker
Like this man who was probably in the military, has a bunch of training, blah, blah, blah, he's a spy, makes sense. This woman just becomes a spy now. Right. where They just allow that? just a lot Like that doesn't make any sense. She gets like a special pass. I don't understand.
00:53:08
Speaker
yeah um Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Let, let people be normal. Please. Just let their, just let their familial, um, relationship get better because now everyone knows what's going on.
00:53:24
Speaker
Okay, are you ready for some movie facts? Yes, I am. Okay, so going back to the the scene where Helen is dancing around the bed after her little striptease. Her fall was accidental. Uh-huh. but um The director really liked how it looked and how in character it was for Helen to to drop like that, that they kept it in the movie, even though, um what's her name? Shoot. What's that? Just his name?
00:53:59
Speaker
wow Jamie Lee Curtis. Jamie Lee Curtis had done other takes where it was perfect. um But eventually when she saw that um the cut with her falling down, she's like, yeah, like I get it. It's part of the character. So they left it in. Of course they did. They couldn't let her live her best sexy life. Right. They can just let her have her moment.
00:54:26
Speaker
Okay, moving back to Arnold Schwarzenegger's biggest challenge for the movie was not doing all the physical stunts, but dancing a tango. He had to take dancing lessons to realistically perform the dance, and he rehearsed the scene for about six months as he wanted to make sure it was as good as the tango as Al Pacino did in The Scent of a Woman, which uses the exact same song. Never even heard of that movie, but great. I have. I have. I just haven't seen it. Also, I think that's a terrible name for a movie. The Scent of a Woman. Oh, it's called Scent of a Woman, but still, it's an it's a not a great title. No. Movie fact three. um Arnold Schwarzenegger had a near fatal accident on set during the horse riding scene um when his horse gets startled and ran out of control. Schwarzenegger managed to slide off the horse, but did this near a near 30 foot drop.
00:55:24
Speaker
and i was just but I was just about to be an asshole and be like, who hasn't had a horse act up while they were on it?
00:55:35
Speaker
Like me too, asshole, but no. know Not me though, I've never been on a horse. I've never been on a horse. How? I've i've just never been on one. and I've never had the opportunity to go on a horse. You're a Northern California girl. How have you not been on a horse? I don't know. I never had a horse phase. I was never in an area where they're like, like go horseback riding is a thing you can do. And I'm just like, that's yeah. That's literally insane. However, you know i know, you don't, you don't even like know someone with a horse. Like I know, like my aunt, i know my auntie did have horses and you never wrote them. Weird. wrote um
00:56:17
Speaker
Yeah, she she had some horses, um like pet them and everything, got to walk beside them, but I never rode them. See, we're gonna have to go horseback riding, because how have you never ridden a horse? I'm just gonna tell you this now, it's kind of painful. That's what I've heard. But like, you ride the bike, so like, you'll probably be okay. Yeah. Yeah, because I hear it's just awful riding a horse. Yeah, it kind of hurts a lot, but you get used to it.
00:56:53
Speaker
ah Fourth movie fact. Oh, fourth and final one. um According to the Guinness Book of World Records, this is the first movie to have a production budget of $100 million. dollars And this made it the most expensive movie at the time, breaking the record of James Cameron's previous movie, Terminator 2. But it would lose its record the next year to Waterworld 1995, but Cameron eventually gets it back with Titanic. The movie is awful. How did it beat? Waterworld is such a bad movie. How in the world would it- It had a higher budget. What can I say? Oh my gosh. That's actually insane.
00:57:35
Speaker
right? It's like, were the people were the producers and like the executives not like reading the script of water world? Were they not like on set watching? water rolling So bad. I've never seen water world so I don't know. Don't Just don't. Don't. You saw the show at Universal Studios. That's all you need to see. You don't need to. Oh, is that what that is? Yeah, you don't need to watch the movie. Oh my gosh. I think I'm good. You're good. Actually, I'm good. Oh, it has a 47% of Rotten Tomatoes. That's kind of too high.
00:58:18
Speaker
Oh, Jack Black's in it. We might have to do it just for this. Jack Black is in that? that That's what it says. I don't remember that, but okay. Anyway. It's been a couple of years, but yeah. Here's the question, Jordan. Is this movie iconic? I put no. This actually might be James Cameron's weakest movie that I've seen, but I enjoyed it. Yeah. No, yeah. I wouldn't say it's iconic. I feel like they're better like spy slash normal person in the relationship movies.
00:58:51
Speaker
But it's like I like it. It's a good movie. Yeah. So yeah. Sorry to realize, not truly iconic, but still a great movie. Yeah, a great movie. I enjoyed myself. Yeah. Had a couple of laughs. It was fun. Right. That's all that really matters.
00:59:13
Speaker
Okay. Jordan, what are your recommendations for this week? Okay, so my first one is the show I started watching On Paramount Plus called ghost I I enjoyed it. It's a utterly ridiculous concept for a show, but I enjoy it. So I Finished I'm all caught up. I'm ready for season four whenever that comes out. I And did I watch it extremely fast? Kind of. I mean, when, when do you not? I feel like I watched all three seasons in like a week. Oh yeah. Um, but yeah, that that's just me. I also had all of this week off pretty much. So that is true.
01:00:08
Speaker
I had time to watch it. He did. My second recommendation is Woman Commando by Iris Starr, Anita, and Coco Jones. Nice. I really enjoyed that song. I really enjoyed that album. I think it's called The Year I Turned 21. But yeah, I really enjoyed it. Had fun. It's a really fun song. It has some Spanish in it. the It's great. um My last recommendation is La La La by Naughty Boy featuring Sam Smith. It takes me back to my high school days. It takes you back to your high school days? It takes you back to my high school days. Okay. It does. I really enjoyed that song. It should have been a bigger hit if you asked me, but you know. That is is this what it is. um But yeah, that's it for me.
01:01:09
Speaker
What about you? Okay, so I have two recommendations. My first one is, it's going to shock everyone. It's a TV show. Um, it's My Lady Jane from Amazon. from Watch the first episode and I actually really like it. it's my lady I've never even heard of that. I think just recently, recently came out. Yeah, it just came out this year. Yeah. But I watched the first couple of episodes. I actually really like it. okay So yeah. I know i know it feels it feels weird to be to to recommend something before I finished it, but I'm like, I actually really like it. So here we are. And then my second recommendation is Better Than Monday by Ginger Root. I'm really into my indie pop rock era. So yeah.
01:02:09
Speaker
I love, I love them. Might go see them. Okay, good for you. Yeah, why not?
01:02:21
Speaker
But yeah, that's it for me. Okay, cool. Thank you so much for listening. Don't forget to follow us on our social media. We have a Twitter and an Instagram. They're both at SY2I Podcasts. Don't forget to send us your movie requests or your movie stories at our email SY2I Podcasts at gmail dot.com. Um, please answer our question about the jet. but just I feel like that's going to bug me for a while if I don't know how jets work. Yeah. I say that as if I know how regular planes work. yeah I really need to know if jets can hover. cant Can they just hover? Can they hover for an extended amount of time? Please let us know.
01:03:08
Speaker
don't yeah thank you and don't forget to share this with your friends and your family subscribe to us on spotify and apple podcast and rate and review us on apple podcast with five stars please thank you thank you everyone have a good week um people are getting covet again so like be careful out there you know my you know my aunt exposed me to covet again kelly What? I drove her to the airport and then literally two days later, she was in our family group chat talking about, yay, it's my birthday, but I have COVID. And I was like, girl, girl, this is the second time you have exposed me to COVID. At that point, stay away from her. Yeah, I did stay away from her. She tripped it. That's crazy. Twice by the same person.
01:04:05
Speaker
And if my sister and my mom come back sick, I swear to God. Swear to God. Not before Florida. Not before Florida.
01:04:16
Speaker
I might have to start putting on the mask again. You're just going to quarantine in your room. I'm going to quarantine in my room and until it's time to go to Florida. You're like, you don't think I want. And then on Sunday, when it's time for me to leave, I'll roll out with my bag of like, wearing two masks for like someone take me to the airport. cetera You're gonna be like, I'm gonna need you to test 48 hours before I get in the car with you and then I'm gonna go to Florida. I'm going to Florida. Thank you. Thanks. Um, but yeah, everyone stay safe out there. Don't get sick. Take your vitamins, take your vitamins and stay iconic. Stay iconic. Bye. Bye.