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3. Be Your Own Boss Bootcamp With Stefanie Jansen
11 Plays1 year ago
She still remembers flying to Montana and learning to 'eat the frog.'
Stefanie Jansen, Founder of Word4Word Writing, shares her origin story of becoming a freelance copywriter while raising four daughters (and one husband). After a fruitful career in corporate marketing, she decided to bring her talents in-house (literally) for the flexibility, financial freedom, and control she craved.
Detail-obsessed, and a die hard defender of the Oxford comma, this Hoosier kicked off her journey with a frigid trip to Montana for Be Your Own Boss Bootcamp with her mentor. Armed with the tools and confidence to try something scary, she jumped in with both feet.
More than six years into entrepreneurship, Stefanie has a healthy dose of perspective ("I work for you. But I don't work FOR you.") and 90-inch vs. 90-minute commute. No wonder she hasn't looked back.
Best of all, she's now become the mentor who inspires and empowers others to go it alone—together.
For more inspiration, subscribe to Unbound Turnarounds on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to podcasts!
LINKS:
– Secrets of a Freelance Writer: www.amazon.com/Secrets-Freelance-Writer-Make-Year/dp/0805078037
– Join the Inbound Insights Email List: www.unboundboss.com/inbound-insights
– Browse Business Unbound Courses: www.unboundboss.com/courses
– Connect with Stefanie: www.word4wordwriting.com/
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Transcript
Introduction to Unbound Turnarounds
00:00:02
Speaker
Welcome to Unbound Turnarounds, a podcast all about the challenges women business owners think about constantly, but rarely voice. We're Nicole and Mallory, entrepreneurs, friends, and co-founders of Business Unbound, a community helping women alleviate the headaches, heartaches, and backaches so work actually works for life. This is your safe space for the ups, downs, and the turnarounds.
First Guest Announcement
00:00:31
Speaker
Welcome back to Unbound Turnarounds. I'm so excited because today we have our first guest on the pod. Nicole, how are you feeling about this? I'm feeling great about it because it's one of my besties for my corporate life and I am so thrilled to see her. I know, I'm excited. So how has the week been so far? Everybody doing okay? It was my birthday yesterday. Fresh 41 coming in on the pod today. In a week exactly, I will be off to Ireland for the first time. That's what I got going on.
00:00:59
Speaker
I'm just here in the fall land. It's fully fall in the north. It's cozy. It's like a time to reflect, so I'm actually into it. Well, I am just really excited about our first guest.
Meet Stephanie Jansen
00:01:11
Speaker
This is Stephanie Jansen. She and I worked together for years in my former corporate life. I quickly became obsessed with her.
00:01:18
Speaker
I just remember from the moment she got to the same company I was at, to the moment she left, she had an incredible work ethic, so creative, just one of the kindest artist people I know. I am just thrilled to have her back with us. I do clearly have some memories of changing diapers for her triplets, and I just want to say thank you for repaying that favor by coming on the pod.
00:01:41
Speaker
Is that apples to apples changing dirty diapers to going out? It depends how this goes, to be honest. So Steph is, she is now the owner and writer at Word for Word Writing, which she founded in 2017 after working eight years in tech marketing.
Stephanie's Career Journey
00:01:59
Speaker
And since then, she's been writing for clients across a really broad spectrum of industries, legal, pharmaceutical, retail, food, and everything in between.
00:02:07
Speaker
So the other cool thing is that she is a Hoosier like I am, and she attended the same college I did at Indiana University. And now she lives in the burbs of Indianapolis where I used to live. So when she is not drinking iced tea or at her desk defending the Oxford comma, she's either playing piano or chauffeuring around her four, that is correct folks, four preteens to all of their various activities. So welcome staff. We are thrilled to have you.
00:02:32
Speaker
Thank you so much. I'm excited to be on. This is my first podcast experience. I know we were so thrilled when you said this was a dream of yours. Yeah, just to be able to talk with other ladies and kind of share it out. It's exciting. I love it. The first thing I want to do is kind of start the way that Mallory and I do when we talk to each other, which is just sharing a high and a low from maybe the last month of your life, business or professional doesn't matter.
Highs, Lows, and Surprises
00:02:58
Speaker
Yeah. That's funny that you guys do this because we did this around the dinner table and we call it high, low Buffalo. And the Buffalo is a surprise. So we said, what was your high today, your low today and something unexpected that happened. Well, please add the Buffalo. Oh gosh. Okay. Um, hi, I think these might both be nonprofessional next week. We're going on fall break to Washington, DC.
00:03:23
Speaker
I did spend some time out there in my youth in Maryland, and we're going to see all the sites. And our girls are at the age where they care about national history. And they've seen national treasure. So we're going to relive that movie. Oh, we're fine. Yeah. Let's see. Hello. I'm having surgery on my foot in a couple weeks. I have plantar fasciitis, like an old lady. But excited to be getting some relief from that. Yeah.
00:03:45
Speaker
And my buffalo, my goodness, is talking to you guys and being invited on and it's fall and it's great. Oh, thanks Steph. Well, good luck on the surgery. Let us know how it goes.
Why Women Start Businesses
00:03:56
Speaker
So I want to remind everybody in this series, so we're going to be digging into the whys. This is our first season. We're talking about the whys behind women starting their own companies and those motivations that come with that because they really are quite diverse.
00:04:10
Speaker
We're really excited to share your perspective as a working mom and how that role has influenced your decisions around entrepreneurship. Before we get into the entrepreneurship career that you've started, tell us about your professional career before you started going out on your own.
From Journalism to Tech Marketing
00:04:27
Speaker
Like Nicole said, I went to Indiana University and I studied journalism.
00:04:30
Speaker
I always had an interest in writing. I was on newspaper and did the editor thing. So I knew I wanted to go into marketing and advertising. I graduated in 2009, which is a tough time to be looking for a job. It was just hard. I had some internships. And finally there was this startup in Indianapolis called ExactTarget. And I just loved everything about the company. I was like, they have some really cool leadership. Their brand is really cool. It looks like the job description seemed like it was written for me.
00:04:57
Speaker
And it just opened this whole journey that I never could have imagined. Some people kind of work their whole lives and wait for that one amazing company. And I had the fortune to start my career with that. So exact target is where I met Nicole.
00:05:12
Speaker
She was the veteran writer on the team. And even though I knew like general things, you know, I'd written articles and press releases and things like that, I didn't know a lot about business writing.
Learning Business Writing
00:05:23
Speaker
And so she really took me under her wing. There are also a couple other writers and my boss and it's a totally different audience that you're writing for. You're writing for not only business, but like buyers and you're speaking to them in different ways than an article.
Promoting Business Unbound Courses
00:05:38
Speaker
Love what you're hearing? Business Unbound online courses help you implement the ideas from this show and change how your company runs in big and small ways for the better. Our courses are meticulously crafted, packed with tactical tools and solutions, and designed to help women genuinely enjoy the day-to-day business journey.
00:05:57
Speaker
We've poured insights from our collective 13 years of entrepreneurship and work with more than 100 clients into every course. And the good news is that we're just getting started. We're on a mission to unite women entrepreneurs who understand challenges, loneliness, and vulnerabilities of running a business. And we want you to be part of it. Visit UnboundBoss.com to browse our course library. We cannot wait to join you on your journey.
00:06:27
Speaker
So one thing that I'm wondering just thinking back about my own childhood and my mom was, did you also think about what you wanted to show your girls? You know, as far as their mom's career, it's going to look different than when you were in corporate. Was that a factor that you thought about? What do I want to show them?
Impact on Daughters
00:06:47
Speaker
Absolutely. So I also grew up with a stay-at-home mom and it was always nice to have her there. I know that times have changed though too and I knew that I wanted to work and I was always worried about that like dropping my kids off at daycare and having them being watched by other people like are they going to see that as a bad thing? Am I a good mother because I'm not there during the day?
00:07:08
Speaker
And I guess what I've learned is that your kids see you working hard and it doesn't mean that you're a bad mother. You know, I have girls and that means something especially to me that they see that a woman can go and own her own business and make money for the family. My mom actually mentioned that to me years ago. She said, just your girls see you doing what you're doing and I'm so proud of you.
00:07:30
Speaker
My girls are actually probably my biggest fan. So I have t-shirts that say my business name word for word, and they wear them to school all the time. Oh, I love it. They're very proud of me.
00:07:40
Speaker
And I think the other thing to just remember is the type of person that they are seeing, you are a, generally speaking, less stressed version, right? As we're focused on them when they're around and you can stop working or start working when you need to. And I think about the type of mom that they're seeing is maybe a different version than they would have seen had you stayed working for someone else.
00:08:03
Speaker
Absolutely. Even if I'm in my office working, I'm still present. If I need to be, if there's an emergency or I can pop out for lunch or for a snack. That doesn't mean that everything is wonderful all the time. There are times when they can see me, so they burst right in and I'm in the middle of something. And that's hard for a kid to understand like, but I can see you, you're right there. Yes, but mom's working just as if she was in an office somewhere else.
00:08:29
Speaker
That makes summers hard. That makes school breaks hard because then I can't focus as well. But we've learned how to rework our family dynamic in those times. And you have to lean on your partner to say, Hey, I need you here. I need you to instill in them mom's working. Okay. So we've kind of gotten
Initial Business Challenges & Mentorship
00:08:46
Speaker
to you. You you're in this new entrepreneur role, but talk to us about those first few years. What were they like? Did you ever kind of have to come back to the why I'm like, why am I putting myself through this?
00:08:58
Speaker
In the early years, I'd say first of all, I was very well prepared by Nicole. I was so thankful that someone else had already gone through all of these things. I'm the oldest in my family and so I've always felt like responsible for figuring out, navigating
00:09:14
Speaker
college and life then kind of sharing it down with others and I was really thankful that somebody had for me because I'm not sure I could have found my own answers. I mean that's some advice I'd give to somebody starting out is find a mentor, find somebody who's done it before and ask your questions. So those are the things I was nervous about, not my ability to write, not my ability to make relationships with people, but the taxes, the insurance, sending an invoice, oh my gosh I have to charge somebody.
00:09:40
Speaker
Those were the nervous things early on and I wasn't sure how to set prices and if a client came back with something they were unhappy with, is that going to ruin me or whatever? The answer is no. The answer is no. And there's plenty of work out there. Of course, always do your best and share quality work, but I've learned so much about
00:10:00
Speaker
not worrying about every little thing and sometimes if things don't work out, they don't work out. That doesn't mean that you're never going to have business coming in from other sources again. Some relationships just don't mesh and you have to break ties with the client and it's not always a bad thing. Sometimes it's good. It frees you for work that you feel more passionate about.
00:10:21
Speaker
I remember having to set my own schedule because even though I'm an organized, diligent person, in the corporate world, you rely on a boss or a project manager to keep you on task. So I had to learn, you need to build in time for this. You need to build in time to write, to invoice, to do the edits, to follow up, send emails. And that's hard because usually you're used to somebody just saying, here are your assignments.
00:10:47
Speaker
I got myself in some trouble a couple times like, oh no, I didn't do that. Or, wow, I did all this work and I forgot to invoice them for the work that I did. And so now I am very diligent about setting up calendar reminders and to-dos and just building in all of those buffers so that I do
Mentorship Experience in Montana
00:11:05
Speaker
that for myself. I know not everybody needs that, but for me, I need those things.
00:11:09
Speaker
I was just going to follow up on the calendar question. Do you remember if we talked about scheduling when you came out? So tell people why you came out by the way and what we generally did. So Nicole already had creative quarterback and I was writing for her on the side, which is a great way to make a little extra money. And I still had a corporate job, but then at night I was working on some things for her data sheets here and there.
00:11:34
Speaker
And she mentioned that I could do this myself. And I'm like, what are you talking about? So when I was at that point to start my own business, she said, why don't you come out? I'll spend some days together and I'll put together kind of a curriculum. And I'm thinking that she's gonna like, we're just gonna have some discussions. And I've really never been out West. And so for me to get on a plane and go to Montana, it's a big deal. But it was such an adventure because it's so beautiful out there. And it's a nice chance to spend some time with my friends. It was also in February. Do you remember how cold it was?
00:12:02
Speaker
Oh, Mallory's been here in the winter multiple times. Coldest day ever recorded? I'm so sorry. It was the coldest day on record. It was terrible. Yeah. So we got together. She gave me pre-work, homework, things to think about. And it was a nice chance for mommy to get away and just be on a retreat to kind of think about what I wanted out of this possible business. So each day, really different parts of the day, hours at a time, hey, we're going to talk about
00:12:32
Speaker
We're going to talk about... Sorry, am I so annoying? I was like, here's our agenda for the minute. No. Exactly how Nicole is. I'm totally not surprised. How many people have friends like this that will put together something like this for you and like, here's what you need to think about and all the different things in the stream of consciousness. So I felt lucky to have those things in hand that I think go back to and okay, here we're going to talk about marketing and then we're going to go and have lunch and have fun. And then tonight we're going to talk about pricing.
00:13:01
Speaker
And then tomorrow we're going to talk about insurance. And so it got me to think about all those things, the fun things like naming your business and they're not so fun things like finding an accountant, all those things. You helped me brainstorm a lot of ideas and what do I want out of this and how much do I want to work?
Planning Ideal Workday
00:13:18
Speaker
What's my branding going to look like? What do you want your day to be like? Oh, yes. Yeah. I mean, that was just one of the things we talked about, right? Was like, how do you literally want your day to run?
00:13:28
Speaker
Yes. You said, what's your ideal day? You know, I talked about the mornings, just obviously there was going to have to be kids getting out the door to school, things like that. But how do you want to spend time reading? You want to take the leisurely morning or get right at it and then maybe get off earlier. So that's fluctuated over the years. I won't deny that, but it helped me be able to block off time on my calendar to say, this is my head's downtime.
00:13:52
Speaker
This is my taking a meeting time or I'm volunteering today at church or in the school and you can't schedule anything there. Sorry. But you know what? I have had a conversation recently with my brother and some other people about the concept of eating the frog. Oh, do you remember? It's still on my calendar to this day. We talk about this in the time course. All of this is in our time course. So if people want to dive in more. It makes me happy you still remember.
00:14:17
Speaker
Yes, I think there's a book, I can't remember his name or anything, but it's talking about that heads down time and talking about how some tools today, they're really the new age concept of the water cooler chat. And as helpful as it is to be able to instantly message somebody, it can be a disruption in your work. And I find lately that when I'm on those kinds of tools, my work
00:14:41
Speaker
becomes answering emails, answering messages instead of the writing part of it. Deep work, that's what it's called. So fascinating concept and I'm probably in an industry where it's okay that I have a little more flexibility and time to step away and be creative or to go on a bike ride or something. I think you need those times to really like set your mind at one thing versus all fires happening around.
00:15:06
Speaker
And we do talk about that in the time course, we talk about getting into that flow state. But for people who don't know, what are we talking about when we say eating the
Productivity Strategies
00:15:13
Speaker
frog? Why would we put that on our calendars? It means to do the thing that's hardest first, or the thing that you don't want to do first. Because if you look at your tasks for the day, you could check off all the little itty bitty things, but that big thing is still lingering.
00:15:29
Speaker
And don't get me wrong, I still do try and like, oh, I know I have this planned for such and such time, but I'll just do this real quick. But to really get to that eating the frog, the thing that you don't want to do, you got to get it done. So you may as well just approach it head on. Now, did that come from West Wing?
00:15:46
Speaker
I can't even remember where it came from now because we did watch West Wing when I was out there. Remember? Also, spoiler alert, that concept that Nicole developed and took you through. I went through a little version of it just on a phone call when
00:16:03
Speaker
I was also coming out, so she was my mentor as well. But two things, if people don't have a mentor, if they're new to entrepreneur world, I know this initial suite of courses we have available right now is really catered toward those who are already in this world. We are going to probably have one coming, I don't know if it'll be next year, a course about getting into entrepreneurship. And it's going to stem from that deck probably that Nicole had.
00:16:29
Speaker
that she built for you Steph. So it will come to fruition as a course for other people to be able to join. And this space will also evolve into somewhere where people can find that mentor. Cause it's hard if you don't know anybody doing it when you're not in this world, like I didn't. She was the only thing I knew. So if you don't have somebody, you know, this new business for starting is really going to be a space for those new people too, as we get the more time to build that out. And didn't we call it be your own boss bootcamp when you came out?
00:16:58
Speaker
BYOB. Everything's got to be named and branded. That's just how we do it. So I'm curious, on the scheduling piece, we did Eat the Frog. And did we also talk about office hours? Because I know Mallory and I have talked about that. But I wonder if we did of talking about, do you need to block in that time for your own business of doing the invoicing and doing the taxes and getting back to your bookkeeper or non-billable time? So is that something you said about it?
00:17:24
Speaker
I was not very good about that. I'll be honest. It's still on my to-do list.
Delegating Tasks
00:17:29
Speaker
I haven't blocked it because usually I'm doing an invoice at a time, which I realize every business is different, but I'll finish a project with one client. I want to invoice them right away as opposed to saving everything for a whole week and hey, everyone here's 10 million invoices at one time. It takes such a long time. It's weird. It's how you get paid. But if you ask business owners, you got to do invoicing. It's like,
00:17:53
Speaker
It's why I hired Mallory and why I have a bookkeeper now. God bless bookkeepers. I have a bookkeeper as well. There are angels on earth, I swear. Well, one of the best pieces of advice that you ever gave me and one that I tell others is if you can make more money
00:18:09
Speaker
taking time that you're not going to spend on something you don't want to do, then just pay for it. And I think that applies to beyond business. Like if you're going to spend time with your family or you can spend time cleaning your house or whatever while somebody else fixes the dishwasher because you don't want to do it, it's worth it. That has saved me in so many ways the stress of doing taxes and putting all that stuff together. It'll eat me alive. But if I can pay somebody to do it, I feel happier.
00:18:39
Speaker
My family feels happier. And half of it is just, am I willing to pay to get rid of this anxiety? Usually the answer is yes. It's another why, to be an entrepreneurship. You don't have to do it. Now you get to make choices. And if you make that choice and you say, you know what? No, I don't want to do my own bookkeeping. Well, that means that instead of having a finite paycheck at another job, maybe I need to take on two more projects a month to pay for that. And that is something that you have the control to do.
00:19:07
Speaker
I paid for it by switching a system that no longer charged processing fees. And those processing fees that I was paying now pay for my bookkeeper. There's creative ways to find resources to get support if needed.
00:19:21
Speaker
Maybe there are numbers people out there, people who get really nerdy about that and they're like, I just love seeing how my business is doing or whatever. That's great for you. And maybe you don't want to write your marketing content on your website. Now that's something I personally enjoy. So it's a give and a take on what things bring you joy and you can be productive and versus causing you undue stress.
00:19:42
Speaker
So let's dive into that a little bit
Supportive Freelancer Network
00:19:44
Speaker
more. How does community and or support really play into your role right now, into your career? Yeah, that's an unexpected thing that's come from this business. I think you think I've got a business and you've got a business doing the same thing. We're competitors.
00:20:00
Speaker
It's not really how it works in the writing world or the freelance creative world. We're actually a network of people because there's enough work to go around as of right now. And so I've formed these relationships with women across the country that we'll get together once a quarter and say, Hey, how are you doing? And what are you working on? And how's your business going? And it's just happened organically. Somebody will say, Oh, we're bringing in two freelancers on this project.
00:20:27
Speaker
Then you get to know that person or when I was in the corporate world, they were a contractor for me. And so we kind of just teach each other little things and I've helped them change how their business is taxed and set up and that saved them money. And then maybe they inspire me about SEO keywords. Hey, I've taken a class online. I'm like, wow, that's really cool.
00:20:48
Speaker
This is my favorite hashtag is community over competition. Yeah, exactly. And there are multiple people like that. I'm really happy to have that community of people and it extends beyond writers too. So my brother-in-law is a videographer and I pushed him for the longest time. I said, I think you need to get out of the office and do what I do. I think you'd be so happy and you could make good money and you're really talented.
00:21:12
Speaker
And so we got together and had the same chat that Nicole and I did. And now I have that person to refer work to and to bounce ideas off of and vice versa. So I'm a huge advocate for entrepreneurship, small business ownership, and doing the gig thing.
00:21:27
Speaker
What I love the most is that you've taken what we did initially and you've just kept passing it forward because I think people always see someone else doing it and they think, well, there's no way I can do that without realizing that that's what we all thought and occasionally still think. And sometimes it just takes one cheerleader to be like, what is freaking you out? Because for the longest time, I felt like everyone was just like, well, where are you going to get health insurance?
00:21:50
Speaker
And I was like, I don't know, but isn't there an answer to this? And once you know the answer, you're like, this is not a big deal. But you need someone to be like, listen, let's talk about what's freaking you out. And then let's just make it not so scary. And in that situation, do you then feel like this is what you want to do?
Confronting Fears for Confidence
00:22:07
Speaker
one of your early questions, the pre-work was what is the worst case scenario? Which is scary to approach, but once you get through it, you realize it's not that bad. So the answer for me was the business doesn't do well and I have to get another job. Okay, I was going to leave that company anyways probably and have to get another job. So it's really not that bad. Like you're going to have your resume ready to go and if it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out and you start making money somewhere else.
00:22:35
Speaker
We talk about this, too. Nicole, you were a Stoic at heart. We talk about this in our mental well-being course about stoicism as one way to build resilience. I think it's the one that's called pre-meditatio malurium, the Latin phrase that it talks about envisioning the bad thing so you can be more prepared. So you were already doing that before you even knew that was like a thing.
00:22:56
Speaker
Oh, I've been envisioning bad things for years and years. That's like my specialty. That's the special sauce that makes me run. Obviously, like it helps stuff see like, okay, it's actually not as bad as I think in my head. Here's what I will do if that happens. You know, the thing that I tell myself constantly is,
00:23:13
Speaker
that I have 100% success rate of staying alive. Those are very good odds that probably I will get through this. Like your brain says this is the end of the world. You're like, is it really because like 100% is like really good.
00:23:31
Speaker
Sometimes, especially if you're a soloist in your own house and maybe you don't have a support network living with you. Like it's very hard to get yourself out of some of those loops and to just be able to say, you know what, what am I really worried about? What am I thinking is the worst case scenario right now? Like once I say it out loud, that's probably not going to happen. So I'm really glad that you're passing that forward as well.
00:23:55
Speaker
Absolutely. It's a good life lesson. I think one of the other things that I learned was how much work was out there because I was so worried. What if I don't get clients? All it takes, especially in the writing industry is someone to know that you're available and all of a sudden your inbox is flooded. Now, I'm not going to say that applies to every industry, but to not be worried that if you are good at something and you have something to offer,
00:24:21
Speaker
then people will seek it out. When I first said to my parents, I'm going to quit my job and do this on my own. Because it's a newer thing, right? We haven't always had freelance writers, especially in tech. And so for them to say, is there enough work in that? You're going to be able to pay yourself. And that's the one thing that has never wavered in six and a half years. There has always been enough work. Well, it's that scarcity, abundance mindset.
Abundance Mindset
00:24:49
Speaker
Yes, and that's not to say like, oh, there aren't bad times. I get that industries fluctuate and the economy fluctuates, but it's to say that people always need a service. And if you are creative with your services and what you can offer people and you offer value and not just a product, they will seek you out. And if there are times when things are light,
00:25:11
Speaker
That's okay. Go enjoy it. I certainly do that now because it will come back around and you will be stressed out at another point and you're going to wish that you took the time to relax. That's true. Seeing it as an opportunity. So when the hard parts come though, how does the why come back in your life to help ground you?
00:25:31
Speaker
instead of being like, okay, I'm just going to quit and get a new job, which maybe that is the answer for some people, but for you, you're still here, you're still doing it.
Control Over Work and Passion Projects
00:25:40
Speaker
So how has that helped you in those hard times? In those hard times, I remember that I'm still the one calling the shots.
00:25:48
Speaker
There's a lot of work and at night people say, I can't believe you get back on to work late at night. I'm a night owl. Some people get on early to work, but you know what? The buck stops with me and I care deeply about my reputation and about the quality of my work. I know that, oh shoot, I have to get this done and this done and this done. And that's on top of all of the personal priorities too. But I know that the next project that comes around, then maybe I can say thank you or I need some time.
00:26:17
Speaker
It's not just going to be floodgates. I get to call the shots on what I get to contribute to. So I think that comes back to my why. The other one is making myself a better worker. So sometimes when I am stressed out, it's not all because my clients are just throwing things at me. It's because I didn't plan well. I need to prioritize better.
00:26:36
Speaker
I need to eat the frog and set up my blocks appropriately. And so it turns me into a better worker for the next time. I have to slide this in. One thing that has just landed for me recently is the word detachment, which normally I would think is potentially negative. But if you flip it and you think, I am offering a service to the best of my ability, my intentions are pure and that I really want to provide the best I can for this client or in your writing.
00:27:05
Speaker
and then be unattached to the results or people's response to that or what their actions are going to be to that. Just being detached from the other people's actions and knowing at heart I'm doing my best. And that has only been the last week I've had this on my heart. I'm a very emotional person.
00:27:22
Speaker
And so having that to be like, no, coming into this podcast today, I'm going to give Stephanie my full attention. And if people don't resonate with the episode or they don't like what my voice sounds like, I'm on attached to that. Does that work for you guys? This concept of detachment, it's a new thing for me. So I'm curious what other people think.
00:27:39
Speaker
Yeah, as a fellow empath, that's the name of the game over here. I would say this has kind of landed for me. I didn't have the detached word, but I would wake up in the morning. The first thing my brain would do would be cycled through a list of everything I needed to do to make everyone else happy and fulfilled and valued.
00:27:55
Speaker
I'm 41. I've been doing this forever, sleeping. And I only recently was like, why do I do this? I wake up and the first thing I think is not like, what should I do for my own happiness or fulfillment or to make me a better person? It's like, I need to do these. I need to make sure this person feels loved today in this way. And I need to make sure I've reached out to this person and I need to make sure that like this client's okay. And it is a laundry list by the time you get out of bed.
00:28:20
Speaker
And at some point I've had to just be like, okay, no, it's okay for you to have an afternoon where maybe you're not taking care of everyone.
00:28:28
Speaker
Maybe someone else can take care of them today. For you, it's one of those, like, do as I say, not as I do, because you're actually really good at telling other people how to do that. So I think back to our classes and the imposter syndrome, and you would just set me at ease and be like, is that a thing? Tell that voice to go away. We're good. So that gave me confidence then to be able to shoo those voices away.
00:28:53
Speaker
We did. We did, yeah. Yeah. My voice's name was, was Mandy. Sorry, Mandy. Oh gosh, she was terrible. You know what? Shut up, Mandy. I'll believe in you. I was like, this girl's the worst.
00:29:08
Speaker
But your original question, so yeah, detaching yourself from what happens after you touch it.
Unattached to Outcomes, Focus on Service
00:29:14
Speaker
So in the corporate world, I used to get so bad out of shape about seeing my project succeed or not succeed. And things would happen that were out of my control. I spent all this time writing something, then it would go to design, then it would go to the customer to approve or the director to approve.
00:29:31
Speaker
And something would happen and it wouldn't launch and I would get so upset. And what I've realized, especially in this business, is I work for you, but I don't work for you. And so I'm happy to deliver this product for you and be a member of your team in the thought process. But when they get it, that's helped with the editing process where I say, I can offer you this many rounds of edits, but after that you take it and run.
00:29:58
Speaker
And I have to let those things go because ultimately they're paying for a deliverable. And I've done my job and it's their baby and they own it. You know, we talk about agreements and contracts. They own that piece and they get to run with it. While it's really great to see how things get published, I can't get Ben out of shape about everything that doesn't launch.
00:30:20
Speaker
Because ultimately, here's the difference between being in an office and being on your own. I still got paid for that work and I got out of it what I wanted. Now somebody who's salaried, okay, you're still getting paid, but you're invested in a different way. You say, I'm not going to do that. That's below my pay grade. Or I need to be seen as this. I need to rise above because I want to get promoted. All that pressure is off with the freelance world. I can name myself whatever I want. Nicole, you told me that I'm the czar of writing.
00:30:49
Speaker
You're the employee of the month every single month. And that was really attractive to me because I was looking at where I wanted to be in 10 years and I'm like, that is going to require so much work and so much time away from my family. And I'm just not sure I'm prepared to give it.
00:31:04
Speaker
And once you take away that pressure, it's so liberating to be able to say, Hey, I own my own business. I set my own times. I make my own money. That feels really good to me and not have to answer to other people and fight and BS about things that I don't ultimately care about just to impress somebody else.
00:31:23
Speaker
no annual reviews, no asking for raises, right? Like these are things that drained my soul. And when I hear other people talk about it, because of course most people I know still have regular jobs and they'll talk about it with such investments. And I just think, thank heavens, I'm not doing that anymore.
00:31:44
Speaker
I think you nailed it. I think what you're kind of saying, Nicole, and what Steph kind of was saying, I think that when you said it's not, this is their baby. It's not, I'm not as invested. A lot of service providers like all come up with the systems and the whole system plan that I think you should execute. This is my best offer. This is my best service recommendation for you. And they can take it or leave it. At the end of the day, I can be detached because it is their company and they are the CEO. They get to make the choices.
00:32:12
Speaker
And sometimes I'm not the right fit for people. If these things are not what you want, then that's okay. I'm not always going to be the best fit for every person because this is my best offering. So if this isn't it, then here's maybe some recommendations of how you can get the support another way. And like we said, that's how the community comes back into play. Here's some people I know in my network that maybe would be able to support you further.
00:32:37
Speaker
And in the long run, those red flags, like if it's not working, it just is such a relief for both parties. And you can be then invested in a client where it is a good fit. So I just love this new concept of detachment. I'm going to ride this out for as long as I can.
00:32:53
Speaker
Yes. I mean, it's so true right at the beginning. I imagine you both were the same way. I mean, I took every single project, things I wasn't even qualified for. Like I have to be able to eat, right? And find this mythical health insurance, which is fine. You guys, in case that's what you're worried about, it's fine. We'll tell you how to do it.
00:33:11
Speaker
I mean, I took everything and looking back now, sometimes I'll go through my email folders. I don't even remember who these companies are. I mean, there's like a hundred of them sitting there. I'm just like, I have no memory of this. I shouldn't have even taken half of these things because they weren't good ideas. Like I knew that, but I was still in that scarcity mindset of not thinking there could be something that was a better fit.
00:33:35
Speaker
which is just something you kind of have to learn along the way. So we have one more question for you.
Investing in Business Tools
00:33:40
Speaker
So if you had a thousand dollars right now, got to spend it on anything in your company, what would you spend it on? Probably going to be boring here and say a new computer. When you're a writer, you don't have a lot of overhead at all.
00:33:55
Speaker
I don't have any inventory or equipment. I just need a Google Doc and an email account, and I'm pretty set. But I have had the same computer since I went out on my own. I also receive corporate computers sometimes, like companies that want you to use their device to get on their network. So I'm kind of bouncing around, but I think I need a new laptop. Are you a Mac girl or no?
00:34:19
Speaker
Totally a Mac girl. Yes. Okay. I was just wondering. Well, you could do that almost with a thousand. I think you could almost. Yeah. Yeah. I think so. And the reason I don't say anything else is because I already invested in it. So like this realm used to be like a burnt red, orange. We added Wayne's coating, things like that to make it a place that I wanted to come to every day. And I felt comfortable and there's light. I love natural light and I love beautiful colors. I already made the investment in that. And there are wonderful tacks.
00:34:48
Speaker
things with that too. Like, hey, when you spend money on your workspace, the government acknowledges that. And you know who tells you all about those? Your accountant that you hired because you don't want to do it. I did recently make a large purchase that was not for the business, if you're interested. I bought myself a new piano. Oh, you did? That's so good.
00:35:10
Speaker
also like a lifelong dream of mine. I inherited the last one, Electric, and it just started like shorting out. And on the north side, there's this piano store and it was just so beautiful. All the pianos are gorgeous. It's your candy shop in there for you. It is. Oh my goodness. And again, find somebody who's your supporter. Greg was just, he was more gunpowder about it than me. He's like, Hey, have you, have you researched the pianos? I get you the piano. Okay. All right. We will, you know,
00:35:36
Speaker
But I have it now and it just, yeah, it brings me a lot of joy. And I paid for it out of my business, which is the best feeling of
Pride in Entrepreneurial Journey
00:35:44
Speaker
all. I'm just so proud of you. It fills my heart with joy to see you doing this. Well, to see both of you, my little business babies. You're just doing it so much better than I did at the beginning. And that was my entire motivation is just, I want you to skip as many hard bits as you can so that you can make this last as long as you want to.
00:36:02
Speaker
And I think that's what we want for everybody in this podcast is to just see women who are still doing it, despite the ups and the downs and coming back to their why, because that's what keeps them going. Oh, Steph, thanks for being here. Yeah. Thanks for having me on. It's a great conversation. Trip down memory lane a little bit. We love it. All right. Well, we'll be back with another origin story on the next episode.
00:36:28
Speaker
Thanks for listening. Hop over to UnboundBoss.com to join our community and leave us a voice memo. We absolutely love hearing from you. If you like the podcast, please subscribe, leave us an Apple review, and share your favorite episodes with other women entrepreneurs. Talk to you soon.