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39. Entrepreneurship for All the Single Ladies with Heidi Bossley
7 Plays4 months ago
Nicole sits down with Heidi Bossley, an Independent Healthcare Quality Consultant, to discuss the ups and downs of running your own business as a single woman. Heidi shares her journey of leaving a stable full-time job, taking a much-needed break, then diving into consulting.
She opens up about the financial and emotional challenges of managing everything independently, and the hard-won lessons she’s learned along the way. Her story is one of resilience, prioritizing mental health, and redefining success on her own terms.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
- The realities of running a business solo as a single woman.
- Why prioritizing mental and physical health over work is critical.
- How to navigate financial independence in business and life.
- When making soul-driven decisions without external validation makes sense.
- The value of investing in meaningful relationships and personal passions.
For more inspiration, subscribe to Unbound Turnarounds on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!
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Transcript
Introduction to Unbound Turnarounds
00:00:02
Speaker
Welcome to Unbound Turnarounds, a podcast all about the challenges women business owners think about constantly, but rarely voice.
Meet Nicole, Mallory, and Heidi
00:00:11
Speaker
We're Nicole and Mallory, entrepreneurs, friends, and co-founders of Business Unbound. Our mission is simple, make business feel better. And that starts with honest conversations about the ups, downs, and turnarounds of entrepreneurship.
00:00:26
Speaker
So whether you're just starting out or you've been your own boss for years, tune in for stories, insights, and strategies that actually make work work for life.
00:00:39
Speaker
Welcome back to Unbound
Season Overview: Support Systems
00:00:40
Speaker
Turnarounds. To remind everyone listening, this season we're talking about all different kinds of support and systems for entrepreneurs. And I wanted to bring someone on the show who has a different perspective about this whole small business space. So I'm really excited to introduce my friend of 10 years, which is insane, Miss Heidi Bosley.
00:01:01
Speaker
So Heidi is a registered nurse who runs her own consulting business about healthcare quality. She has 20 years of experience in healthcare and specifically advises organizations on quality management, health information technology, and quality improvement.
00:01:16
Speaker
Now, since one of her mottos is that she works so she can travel, she spends her free time enjoying her second home here in Montana and traveling the world to ride as many horses as she possibly can, something I obviously encourage. So she and I met a decade ago when I first visited Montana for a yoga and horseback riding retreat.
00:01:36
Speaker
we carpooled from the airport from what i can recall and became fast friends so
Running a Business Without Support
00:01:42
Speaker
on this episode we're gonna talk about what it takes to run a business without the emotional financial support of a spouse partner or employees.
00:01:52
Speaker
And I've been really inspired watching her over this long period of time to see her resilience and how she intentionally builds community and her commitment to doing business her way. So it's good to see a friend. Welcome, Heidi. Hello, friend.
00:02:09
Speaker
I'm glad to be here. Yeah. So I'm doing this episode solo today, and I am going to ask some questions that I know Mallory wants answers to as well, but mostly it's going to be you and I chatting through kind of this single lady life.
00:02:27
Speaker
of entrepreneurship.
Heidi's Entrepreneurial Journey
00:02:28
Speaker
So let's set the stage. Tell me about back when you decided to jump into running your own business and why you decided to give it a shot. Good question. I love that we're memorializing the conversations we've had in the past. So this is fun. I was not intentional in starting a consulting business. It was not something that I ever thought I would ever do.
00:02:53
Speaker
I was in a job that was very intense, very time consuming. I was working seven days a week, an afternoon off, if I let myself have that. The company was financially a little rocky, and I realized I had lost my quality of life. I had none. All I was doing was working. And when it started impacting
00:03:22
Speaker
my personal relationships, and I was putting on weight because I was eating for stress. I was drinking more than I wanted to be. All those pieces made me realize I had to – no one else could make this decision. No one was looking out for me. I needed to do it. So I gave notice for the job.
00:03:43
Speaker
And I loved it when people asked me, so what are you going to do now? And I'm like, I don't know. I'm not sure, honestly. Right. I have no clue. And they opened two ideas, friends. Right. Exactly. And I was like, how are you? They asked, how are you going to? Well, like, how did you make this decision? I was like, I had to. And it was either buy a new car or quit my job. I quit my job. That was it. And so I took two months off. And that was when we met.
00:04:14
Speaker
It was right around the summer of 2013. And we were surrounded by, this was interesting to me at the time, we were sitting at this big square table of women who hated their jobs. I mean, it was absolutely not. I did not anticipate that. And I remember that you were in this weird in-between state.
00:04:41
Speaker
And do you, what do you remember about those conversations? Because I'm guessing you didn't think that was going to be part of the retreat either. No, right. Well, first of all, the retreat was one I had wanted to go on for years, could never work it into my schedule because of the job. And I finally made it. And so I was excited, but had no clue what, no clue. So my first time on a retreat like that. And it was,
00:05:09
Speaker
in many ways validating
Independent Decision Making in Business
00:05:12
Speaker
that I wasn't the only one who was going through this, but also depressing that others were going through this as well. What I found interesting, too, was that I had found the solution for myself. I didn't know what the full solution was, but I had found the solution for myself.
00:05:31
Speaker
And I was listening, I don't even remember one woman's name sobbing at the table at the final closeout about how miserable she was. And I'm thinking to myself, then how do you fix it? No one else is going to fix it for you. How do you fix it?
00:05:46
Speaker
and I don't know whatever happened. But yeah, it was refreshing to have others say the same thing and then also really depressing. I don't know if you felt the same way. I did feel the same way. I had felt like the only one who was unhappy.
00:06:04
Speaker
because I literally didn't know anyone else running a business. I don't think I ever knew anyone who quitted unless they were going to go have a baby. I knew plenty of those, but I didn't know anybody who just quit. I heard your story and I was like,
00:06:20
Speaker
Huh? Okay, so that is an option. Interesting. But it was also very restorative because I think we were finally in a place where we had the space, like physically and mentally. And I think that's what those other women found too, was like they finally had a second to step back and be like,
00:06:42
Speaker
this is miserable, like what am I doing? And normally we just like, you just stay on the wheel, you know, you just keep doing it. So what did you find when you let, you decided to quit before you decided what else you were going to do? So when your family, your friends found out about this, they were like, uh, so how do you, what are you going to do?
00:07:07
Speaker
because you're a single lady and you pay all your own bills and you've always taken care of your own mortgage. How scary was that to think about quitting and then not knowing what the next step was? Yeah, I think I was so desperate. I didn't care and I didn't ask anyone.
00:07:32
Speaker
I didn't seek advice. I sat on that. There were several moments where I almost walked away from the job before that and didn't. By the time I finally made that decision, it had been several months, at least from the fall until that spring.
00:07:54
Speaker
where I had mentally processed what was right for me and knew and evaluated and was willing to skinny down my budget. And like, this is unheard of for me. I don't clean my house. I didn't have anyone come clean my house for a while. I did it myself. So I was willing to do it. And so it was interesting. My mom was incredibly supportive, but as we all know, Georgie's amazing.
Networking and Business Growth
00:08:21
Speaker
And so she would of course be that way.
00:08:24
Speaker
I don't remember other people giving me feedback, but again, I didn't ask for it. So it was just, I did it. I think that's a good point. Like I didn't ask anybody either. I told people once I decided, and I only told some people a year before I was leaving because that's what I decided I was leaving. And then the rest of the people I told later, you know, but I didn't, I didn't ask anybody either. They didn't need to know. It wasn't their decision. Yeah.
00:08:53
Speaker
Now I did get one comment which the individual will not be named but uh who Made one remark when I did leave I'd been in my first job post grad degree for about nine years and then this second job was roughly three years and He was concerned that I was perhaps showing that I was I wasn't committed to a job and I was like, I don't think that's
00:09:22
Speaker
Of all the things to worry about, that's not what I'm worrying about. You're like, I'm not committed to sadness. So that's not it. Right. That was the only thing that ever struck me. And I just it was fascinating because for so I don't consider nine years and three years to be short. But also, at that point, to me, I didn't I wouldn't have cared.
00:09:44
Speaker
I would have just walked away anyway. Well, and I do think there are people that ask, what about your resume? What if there's this gap? It was not like it is now. Nobody took time off. That's not a thing that happened. Now, everybody's
Financial Planning and Independence
00:10:00
Speaker
like, yeah, stay in a job for four minutes and then get a new one and then get a new one every year. It's like, okay, I guess. But at the time,
00:10:09
Speaker
that was not the case like you went from one job to another and if you took the weekend that was good for you right. Yeah i know i see a lot of people do that even now and i i've told i have lots of opinions for better for worse on this and one of them is it is the one time in between jobs.
00:10:30
Speaker
to have it to yourself. You don't have obligations of figuring out what your to-do list will be for the next week. Who do you need to have a conversation with? Where are you with financial objectives or what have you for the company? You're free. And that's what I loved once I walked away. I really told people I was not taking any, I wasn't considering anything. I started having conversations with groups about potential consults
00:10:59
Speaker
maybe a month and a half to two months in, but I was not entertaining anything because I needed to recharge myself. I needed to find myself again. I really had lost myself. That's so smart. Like if I had to do it again, that's what I wish I'd done differently because what I basically did was work two full-time jobs for a year,
00:11:25
Speaker
to convince myself it'd be fine. And then I've just been doing that for 10 years now. So like, I never took a break. It was not the smartest, but also I didn't have anyone to like model after so making it up as we go. That's okay. Yeah. And that's, there's no one right answer. That's the other piece to this too. Well, but I will say taking a minute for yourself
00:11:50
Speaker
That's always a good idea. So when you were thinking about this, I know that you are a very like, methodical, planful, organized person.
00:12:03
Speaker
So were there things that you had done when you had a traditional job, possibly around finances or your home or how you budgeted that ended up being really helpful when you decided to take that break or to go out on your own? Were there things where you were like,
00:12:25
Speaker
I'm really glad that I run my life this way so that I
Lessons from Entrepreneurship
00:12:31
Speaker
can do this. Were there any things like that that you realized maybe you didn't know that you were doing them to prepare for this but ended up helping you prepare for this? Absolutely. A lot of the work that I did and I have been blessed with the jobs that I had as much as the last one almost killed me and the first one was incredibly frustrating often.
00:12:54
Speaker
that I was exposed to a lot of different things. So some of the work that I do is on the periphery of government contracting. I did that in both previous jobs.
00:13:07
Speaker
I also was the lead often for submitting proposals and running the process through finance. I worked with legal a lot on contracts and things I never thought of because again, didn't plan this and honestly started consulting to fill that gap, right? That was the concern was I had to show I was doing something at some point because I didn't know how long it would take me to find a job.
00:13:33
Speaker
I was able to translate. I feel comfortable reading a general contract and knowing for myself if it's good. Did I pull together my mock draft one that I send to clients? No. I had a lawyer do that.
00:13:48
Speaker
But I know what to look at and know. You knew to hire a lawyer. Frankly, you did know. Exactly. There are things I know where I can push the envelope and there are times when I can't. But those backgrounds, the things that I never, I have an MBA, I never really intended to apply any of that stuff, but it looked good on my resume. It was the smart thing to do and never regret it.
00:14:17
Speaker
But those pieces have carried forward in a way that I never thought. So kind of having this varied background gave you a bit more choices when you were thinking about consulting, because instead of being like, I've only ever done one thing, you had kind of this smattering of skills that you could be like, what am I really good at? What do I really enjoy? Is there an overlap of those two?
00:14:46
Speaker
Or do I care? Do I just need a paycheck? You could make those choices. But yeah, I think that's similar to how I felt because I had done many, many jobs and had many hats. And it was like, I don't know. I kind of do a bunch of stuff. I don't feel like I've just been doing one thing. Don't ask me to
Valuing Life Experiences
00:15:04
Speaker
do my taxes. Don't ask me, but I can invoice clients. I can track my hours. I can invoice clients. Yeah. So when you headed off on this path,
00:15:16
Speaker
Did you think in the back of your mind, like, I'm going to just go get another job? Probably. Like at the end of this couple of months, like, I'm just going to go get a job. Absolutely. Yes. I interviewed. Oh, you interviewed. Oh, you went like hardcore. Okay. I didn't even make it that far. Yeah, no, I did. I only remember having a few interviews.
00:15:37
Speaker
There's one that one of my old staff actually was also interviewing for the same position And that headhunter messed up and had us show up at the same time. That was awkward And that was when I was on the starting to be on the fence of do I really want to work full-time? Ever again in this in this way in a formal I must go into the office but I did I had assumed that the consulting would be a short-term filler
00:16:04
Speaker
And I told clients that I would take a new job and and it was really short-term interim and then Someone said to me and I don't remember when this was and it was a really good point that I needed to think about what the when that point was when I had consulted long enough that it would could look like not that it would but that it could look like
00:16:29
Speaker
If I moved on to a job, I hadn't succeeded at consulting. And me being me going, oh, no, no, no, no, I can do this, right? And they said, I think you need to, five years in for consulting, three to five years would be, okay, you could do it successfully. And I don't remember who said this to me. I've never heard that. Yeah. Now how much that influenced me?
00:16:54
Speaker
It did when I really decided I was going to stay with consulting. I was like, then I'm doing it for at least five years, man. I can show that this is successful, I can do it. But it was very interesting. They were like, you don't want it to look like a blip. And I'm like, how does this work? That's interesting. Okay, so I'm curious when you took those couple months off and you were like, I need to,
00:17:22
Speaker
essentially find myself again. I don't want to get too poetic about it.
00:17:28
Speaker
Really? Yeah, like, what am I even doing? Like, what am I doing? What were some takeaways that you had from those couple of months, right? Because you had those couple of months, I'm sure you were thinking about this a lot, and then you went off and interviewed, and I'm guessing your brain was like, you remember those things that we talked about when you had all that space? Do you want to talk about that again? Should we revisit it? Yes.
00:17:54
Speaker
you revisit that as you head down the path that you just hated? So what were some of the highlights from those couple of months where you just took a minute? What came up? What did you end up wanting or not wanting? Yeah, so again,
00:18:12
Speaker
It will sound like I
Building a Supportive Community
00:18:13
Speaker
was super intentional. I'm not. That's just kind of, it's how I happened. But I, there were days, first of all, where I didn't do anything. And it was, I let myself sleep and recharge and go for a walk or go for a run or do something else. Which was important because I knew that I was not in any mental
00:18:39
Speaker
or even probably physical, but mental shape to make decisions in a useful way. And so that was part of what happened. And the other thing was, having gone through this experience, I realized having your work-life balance in the way it should be for you, which is different for everyone, but I couldn't sacrifice my quality of life
00:19:09
Speaker
for a job or whatever else it would be. And the only individual, what became very clear to me, the only individual who could do that is me. So I control it.
00:19:24
Speaker
and I have had conversations with myself multiple times since then to remind myself. Oh yeah, daily over here. It's daily over here. I'm like, who set it up this way? Oh me, I did. I set it up this way. I invoiced 12 clients this last month and I was like, what am I? Oh, I agreed. I agreed. It is me. Yeah, I'm the problem. I'm the problem. Exactly. So were you finding that
00:19:55
Speaker
Like you said, you started running a little bit, like you were actually sleeping. What was it that your body was asking for that you hadn't been doing when you were working seven days a week, maybe taking an afternoon off? If you allowed yourself, I believe was the phrase. That was it. And that was true. I think it was just moving because most of what I did was sitting. And I remember at one point,
00:20:25
Speaker
just It might have been sitting but sitting in silence Because having any all I would do During that period work toward the end was I was in a meeting from nine to five and then I had a line of staff waiting for me when I got done with my meetings and
00:20:46
Speaker
And then once that was done, I was sitting down and doing work. And so I never had a moment to just let my mind sit and wander and think. And there were several couple, well, this was 10 years ago, so it was probably a CD or something, but I had some music that really spoke to me and
00:21:09
Speaker
I just remember playing that on repeat and it just soothed me. It just resettled my mind. And those were the small things for me. It wasn't big, drastic things, but the small things. And quite frankly, it was just being quiet.
00:21:26
Speaker
Yeah. Well, and I think that's something that almost cues your brain that you're not doing what you used to be doing because in your case, you know, you were in meetings all day. There was no time for listening to music. There was no time to just like sit quietly. You're not, you're not making lunch.
00:21:43
Speaker
you might go to the bathroom if you're being crazy. But it's like these little cues that tell your brain like, I'm not trapped right now. And I still find that I have those like I, I like to have the TV on in the background.
00:22:00
Speaker
i just reminds me that i'm not in an office you know like it seems silly cuz it's like that's probably not the most productive thing i could be doing but then again i don't have to be efficient anymore. I don't have to you know and i'm like if something takes three times as long and i have the time.
00:22:22
Speaker
I'd rather cue my brain that it's fine, you know, or like taking the dog for a walk or just like doing some of these things during the day. It's also why I go to the barn in the daytime because it's triggering my mind. Like you're free now. Like you can do what you want when you want and that's okay. Like you can work at night and that's fine.
00:22:46
Speaker
Absolutely. I think it's important to find those cues for yourself because it is easy to set up your own business in the exact way that you were working for someone else. Right. I could have done that. I could have pulled in more people. I could have decided that I was going to go for big government contracts. In what I do, yes, I could have done that.
00:23:11
Speaker
What I decided was in large part because I didn't want to get back down that rabbit hole, I wouldn't do it. And I'm very transparent about that with anyone I'm going to work with. And I don't bring on staff. Anything I do is work that I do for myself because a bit of a control freak, like to know what I'm doing. Also know, I like to know when I can procrastinate and then I live with the consequences afterwards. Really fun.
00:23:41
Speaker
And so it's worked well for me. That's just rescheduling. Procrastinating is, yeah, we're calling that rescheduling. That's my new word. Yes, we are slotting that in later. That's fine. That's not the same at all. Perfect. I'm using that from now on. Yeah, I've rescheduled you for never. I'm never doing this.
00:24:09
Speaker
Love what you're hearing? Go from big idea to business owner in five days with our free Be Your Own Boss Bootcamp email course. Or learn how to implement the insights from this show in your existing business with our complimentary guide, Five Ways to Make Business Feel Better. Packed with practical tools and solutions, these resources draw from our collective 15 plus years of entrepreneurship and work with more than 100 clients.
00:24:39
Speaker
visit UnboundBoss.com to grab your freebies. It's time to make work work for life. A couple of episodes ago in the last season, Mallory's husband came on and chatted with us about what he does with human performance and all of that. And in addition to reminding me that he's a genuinely lovely human being,
00:25:03
Speaker
They talked a little bit about the kind of support that he gives Mallory as a business owner, right? Like you have someone at your home. Well, he travels a lot, but still you have someone in your immediate sphere who's kind of like helping you do the life, helping you pay the bills, all the things. And we love that. You and I
00:25:27
Speaker
do not have that. And so I think it's, I felt like it's important to have an episode where we can talk about what that is like as well. Because at least in my experience and perhaps in yours, it's very easy when we live alone, like we don't have roommates or anything.
00:25:47
Speaker
to just kind of spiral out on some of this business stuff when it gets tough, right? There's no one else in the house. No one's like, hey, do you want to make dinner? There is no interruption to this brain.
00:26:03
Speaker
None. It just goes on forever. Sometimes part of it's going on inspiringly forever is good grief. I have to do this by myself theoretically forever. If that's where this is trending, I got to pay for everything forever. I have to manage my own retirement.
00:26:27
Speaker
by myself. It can kind of stack up on me. And I'm curious if that ever stacks up on you and how you get yourself out of that particular spiral. And I'm curious if we do it the same ways or not. I don't know. This will be interesting to see. So I spiral a bit. I think I've told you this before. I'm always looking at my finances. Always.
00:26:52
Speaker
You said daily, right? Like pretty much you look every morning. Oh, I do daily. I just already checked my bank account. Well, estimated taxes are due. Okay, that stresses me out, but that's okay. So yes, I there there is a point where
00:27:07
Speaker
When I started this, it took me till a year and a half when I really realized, oh, wait a minute, I can do this, but I can do this. I don't need- I seem to be doing it. This might work. I'm actually okay, I think. Right, and people like what I'm doing, so we're good. And then by three years, the income was somewhat predictable. The first few years, I will tell you, it was probably more of a roller coaster because I felt like I could never catch up
00:27:37
Speaker
on what I owed, particularly taxes. There's a theme here, but taxes. I would get a note and say, well, you're under your estimates. You've got to give me another 10,000. You've got to give me another. You're like, now I have to go get another project just to give it to you? What is happening? By the way, you're the only one responsible for saving into your retirement. It's amazing. I love the amount that I can do.
00:28:06
Speaker
but there's no one matching it, it's just me. So all those pieces I constantly revisit.
00:28:15
Speaker
So I do I don't know that I swirl I calculate i'm constantly calculating i'm calculating when This client will likely pay me so that and i'm financially stable But it it's always moving the deck chairs To the way that they need to be to be able to successfully move forward and so
00:28:37
Speaker
That part, and I think because I've only operated that way, I've never had someone, a part of my household who's contributed to the income, it's okay, but it is different. And so when I hear people, I really love it when, you know, I have a twin sister, I adore her, but she's married, four kids, and there are times when I've heard how, and of course it is, it's hard,
00:29:05
Speaker
for four kids and headed to college, all this stuff. And I say to my mom, I was like, but let's think about it from the single side. I only have myself putting my retirement together. I only have myself paying my bills. I didn't have a registry.
00:29:24
Speaker
For all of my kitchen, the amount of time that I spend screaming, Heidi, about not buying someone else any more cereal bowls, like I, I'm just like, I don't know why this is stuck in my mind. But I am like,
00:29:41
Speaker
I buy my own towels, you guys. Okay. I bought my own towels forever. Right. And let me be clear. I love that someone has found someone that they want to spend the rest of their life with. I think it's amazing. We'd be happy to, but also from the single side. Like it's all on me. So it's always been all on me.
00:29:59
Speaker
I've just mixed it up a bit on how I make my money. I also have amazing clients that pay me on time and that come through with the money and continue to give me more work. I also know that I have a safety net. A few have said, hey, if you ever want to quit this consulting gig, we probably could find a position for you. I know I have that.
00:30:23
Speaker
So that all helps but yes as you know, I check my bank account usually every morning. I mean Never know you never know things could go wonky Yeah, that's yeah, and I I know and hear some of listeners who are In relationships will probably be rolling their eyes to being like, do you know how much my husband cost me? Yeah No, I'm sure that's true. I would still like to see the math
00:30:52
Speaker
I just want to see the numbers. That's all I'm saying. I just want to see the numbers. Because you are technically spent in your property taxes. Anyway, so you're in an interesting spot though, because as I've seen you grow your business, you've actually purchased like a second home here in Bozeman, right? And so you've done some interesting things that I feel like
00:31:17
Speaker
Some single people who are working traditional jobs would be like, that's totally off the table. Like traveling, second home, like these are totally off the table if I go out on my own. And you have found some creative ways to do that. So tell me about this whole like travel priority. How are you, how do you position that to yourself to like spend money on yourself?
00:31:46
Speaker
because I think that's the other thing is it's really easy for people to spend money on kids, spouses, families, all the things. And it can feel a little bit like, oh, I need to just literally squirrel everything away because it's just me. And so it can be hard to feel like you can justify trips. Time off.
00:32:12
Speaker
you know, like buying yourself a new car, which you did eventually do great. Buying a second home, like these things. So how do you, how do you kind of mindset shift that to be like, you know what, this is a priority. The things that I like to do are valid and I am allowed to spend the money that I have earned to do these things. Like does that ever come up in your mind?
00:32:38
Speaker
Yes, I guess so. And it's interesting. So for example, I quit the job in March and in May or June, whenever that was, I was on the retreat. So obviously that didn't seem to stop me for better or for worse. I don't know. So, but I think part of it, there's a couple of things to it.
00:33:03
Speaker
I'm trying to think of how to, it's in no particular order. I love riding horses. There is a time certain on that, and there will come a point where going international and just getting on a horse and going out into the wild will probably be less likely. One of the things I want to be sure is I don't live with regrets, and that would be one regret I would have.
00:33:27
Speaker
the other pieces to it. And again, it's kind of the, I don't want to look back on my life and realize what I missed.
00:33:36
Speaker
I always loved international travel. I love travel in general. I love going to see family, to see friends. I've done some really unique, fun things even without horses. You took me to New York City and there wasn't a horse on our agenda. It was very weird. I know there wasn't, but we did do a Broadway show. We did do a Broadway show and it was great.
00:34:00
Speaker
So when I did a few, my first international trip was when I was a senior in high school with my parents. And that was amazing. We had a blast and went to Switzerland where my dad's family was from. And then I kind of watched my parents and I've seen this with my grandparents as well financially might've been part of the reason it was for my grandparents. They probably would have loved to travel. They would have loved to experience new things they couldn't afford to.
00:34:27
Speaker
my dad and mom had other priorities. There were things he always wanted to go to Scotland, and he never was able to go to Scotland before he passed. There are things like that that I think back on.
00:34:41
Speaker
that I never want to regret. It's why for my 50th this last year, I did the weekend in Nashville with 20 of my friends and yes, 20 women in Nashville and we had a blast. We had our female cousins get together the weekend after and had a house. Like I am willing to sacrifice some other things in order to have those experiences. And so,
00:35:10
Speaker
Yeah, financially, yes, I probably spend quite a bit of money on it. But if I don't do it now and save it to the end, and I'm saving just fine now,
00:35:21
Speaker
I won't have, who's to guarantee that I'll be able to experience those things. What stories are you going to be telling at the old folks' home? Thank you. You're going to be like, there was this time that, no. No, you're like, you're going to be the one everyone wants to sit next to and be like, I just got stories. She's got stories. Always got to have stories. You got that with her because my goodness, what a life.
00:35:46
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. And I think also when you're the kind of, we're similar on this front, like the finances is, that's always in the back of our mind. Like you check it daily, that would freak me out. But yes, I check it in my head. It's a comfort. Yeah, I don't know what that is, like sucking my thumb basically. But it's the kind of thing where I also know that if I saved what I would have spent on vacation, I would feel exactly the same way.
00:36:14
Speaker
Like, I'm not going to stop checking my bank account, you know, like, that's more like who I am. And so I may as well also go on vacation. So that seems wise.
00:36:28
Speaker
I feel like I also know what my tolerance level is for risk on money, right? And I know I have a cushion. If I didn't have a cushion, I'd be making different choices. If I didn't know that I was pretty much guaranteed work for the next year, I might make different choices, but that's where I am now and I'm very blessed to be that way. Yeah.
00:36:52
Speaker
I'm glad that you brought up knowing that your network is reliable, that even if projects are not completely predictable, you have a network of people that would definitely give you work, or give you a job, frankly. You're probably never gonna take that option, but it's always there, and that's nice. You also mentioned taking a bunch of your friends to Nashville for your birthday, and so I wanna pivot a little bit to talk about
00:37:20
Speaker
support networks that are not a partner sitting in your house. You're very intentional about developing these deep relationships with other people, whether they're on the business side or on the personal side. I think that's something that single business owners
00:37:41
Speaker
Typically do really well or wish that they did right? Like I think it's something that's clearly lacking if they're not investing in that So what does that look like to you? What kind of support network have you built up and how is that? How does that help you in running your business even though you're a solo business owner? It's a great question I partly because
00:38:06
Speaker
I would like to think, although there are some quirky horse people out there, but I think a lot of my friends are more into this horse riding and I think there's a community there that, and I may have just dreamed this up in my mind, I have no idea, but who
00:38:27
Speaker
They love a challenge you're always learning because if you as they say if you think you've learned it all on horse you might as well stop riding them because They'll be different tomorrow. Yep. Exactly. And so I think that's part of it. But I also I've just found the right women and it's mainly women who
00:38:50
Speaker
understand, even though they may not be single, they may be in a different place of their lives, we all have things in common. I've watched friends go through a struggle with a job. I've watched friends quit the job. And it's been amazing to be able to share with them what I did, what I went through, and to hear how they're doing and how they've flourished afterwards. I've never yet had a friend say it was the worst thing I ever did, right?
00:39:20
Speaker
It's also been fun to to watch Particularly some of my clients have younger women in the workplace and there was just one individual who I could tell was struggling with where she was and The the job was just not Fulfilling for her or anything and to her credit she fixed it. She found another job and I remember saying to her i'm so proud of you because
00:39:48
Speaker
You you knew no one else is going to fix this for you other than you and you looked out for yourself and so the friendships I think that naturally are evolved for me are those individuals who
00:40:01
Speaker
care about other individuals who want to know how you're doing, but who also are willing to listen to you, Vince. I have one friend who's also a consultant on her own single, and Sarah and I send messages to each other all the time, snarky, this, that, and to have just someone who gets it,
00:40:23
Speaker
Is amazing right and it's been so neat to see My friendships evolve with clients. Some of them have become very close friends All those pieces together. I don't know what I don't know how it happens
00:40:38
Speaker
But it's been amazing. I think there's two sides of everything. And one of the things that I think single life, especially as a business owner, but even not, can give you is the space and almost like the desire to create that community because
00:40:57
Speaker
you don't have a default person to do everything with. You don't have a default person to go on trips with. You don't have someone to plan the next year out with. I think we proactively are more likely to go and search out the community that we intentionally need and want than sometimes people who may have a spouse who's delightful
00:41:24
Speaker
But maybe then that kind of goes by the wayside, right? And they maybe don't have this vibrant network of people anymore. And I think some of those end up as regrets later. Because, you know, like I said in the very beginning,
00:41:40
Speaker
you and I have been friends for 10 years now. Like we took a trip last year for our 10 year anniversary. Like it's something that we spend the time and effort to continue and to pour into. And like when you're here, we hang out and like, we don't talk every day, but it doesn't matter. Like we have such a shared experience and a history that like,
00:42:05
Speaker
you're my person for certain things. And we have these communities built out that have certain people for certain things, not one person for everything. And so I think that's really valuable and I don't personally spend enough time necessarily acknowledging that we've done that. But I'm like, yeah, no, we totally did that. All of my friends don't have to do with my job anymore.
00:42:31
Speaker
like almost none of them do now, which is like, I don't talk about work with my friends, which is bananas, because that definitely used to be the case. So I definitely think there's a community piece there that we do well almost because we need to, but not everyone does. So I think it's worth acknowledging that like, that's a big thing that you've done well,
00:42:57
Speaker
is to be like, I'm going to surround myself with the kind of people that make my life vibrant and exciting and fun and, you know, feel supported and somebody I can rant to about cereal bowls. And like, you'll just be like, Oh God, cool. Okay. All right. Yeah. Like I buy my own towels too. All right. Calm down.
00:43:16
Speaker
Well, the other thing to that, too, though, oh, have I lost my thought? I might have lost my thought. No. So I had I still have a lot of people say, well, you must miss going into the office, talking to people all the day. And I'm like, I know that it would be an emphatic no. And I always say to them, I was like, I like working at home. I objected to COVID because also everybody said during COVID, well, your life didn't change. Actually, it did.
00:43:45
Speaker
I am now stuck on a video every hour, it seems like. It used to be phone calls. I was much more productive in my house, which is why it looks like a bomb exploded behind me. But it's one of those things where I think that's the other piece of this, too, is if I was in the office every day, I'd interact with people. That'd be great. I know I would love it.
00:44:10
Speaker
But I I don't have to do that. And now I can pick and choose what my social activities are and who I interact with and when I do it. And I find that as equally even better than what I had going into a job. And I think that's key. Right. That.
00:44:27
Speaker
I'm not forcing relationships because i have to because i'm going into the office. I'm building relationships based on who and when and where and all those pieces and so. That to me i know i love working from home i love being able to like this afternoon i'm meeting up with a friend.
00:44:48
Speaker
Which is great. I want to meet with her, right? And I'm going to procrastinate on a few other things that should probably get done. Reschedule. Reschedule. You're going to reschedule that. So it's the other side to this. And that's, yes, that's the energy piece that I talk about a lot too, is that before I would get home from the office and I would have nothing left. I'm empty, you know, because I spent it chatting in the kitchen, making conversation in the elevator.
00:45:19
Speaker
that takes from me. I'm not an extrovert. I'm not like a hermit, but you know, energy is limited. And now like that was one of the biggest reasons that I quit my job and moved to Montana was because I wanted to keep most of that energy thimble for the people that I wanted like those deep relationships with and that community. It's thimble size for you. Oh, it's the energy thimble. It's rough.
00:45:35
Speaker
in meetings.
00:45:49
Speaker
But now it's like, like, I think about that actually every time that I call you or you call me just out of the blue. Like, that's a cue to my brain that I have the space, you know, and I can take calls from my friends without being like, I just
00:46:08
Speaker
It's just, the day's been so long. You love them, but you're just like, I'm empty. You don't have any brain power left. Right. And now I find that running my own business, yes, it has all the ups and downs and the things, but the priorities are in a place of if someone calls, I can answer.
00:46:29
Speaker
and I can be there, right? If somebody calls and needs something from me, I'll go drive over there during the day. It doesn't matter. So that's another thing that I think, yeah, of course we don't miss the office. What? I know. I always love that question. I know. No. Man, really miss that panty hose. Shoot. Okay, so fun closure here as we wrap up. Since you love travel so much, if you,
00:46:57
Speaker
ended up taking another sabbatical from work one day, which you probably will because that's who you are. What would be still on your travel wish list that you haven't been to before? Like what's first thing on that list? That is a difficult question. You knew it would be too, didn't you? I mean, you can give me a few if you need to. Okay. So one would be Japan, just because I think it would be beautiful. And the other
00:47:25
Speaker
Anywhere new to ride a new horse that truly is although You know, I fell in love with my horse in Spain last year So it might just be revisit so Mara and I can ride together. But as you can tell I can't decide on one What if there's a where's there's another horse that you're gonna love somewhere else? You just don't know until you go and interview all the horses. That's how I've always felt exactly
00:47:51
Speaker
Okay. Well, I love this conversation. I love that basically I just got to catch up with my friend for an hour, which is super, but thank you for coming on and chatting about this topic. I think it's important to kind of represent this side of entrepreneurship since it's just, it's got some different things about it. It's got some different things. So thank you for chatting through that with us and we will be back next week.
00:48:18
Speaker
Thanks for listening. Visit UnboundBoss.com to download free resources, browse our courses, or leave us a voice memo for the podcast. And if you like the show, please subscribe, leave us an Apple review, and share your favorite episodes with other women entrepreneurs. Talk to you soon.