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2. More You & More Me With Mallory Underwood
18 Plays2 years ago
Even on the toughest days, entrepreneurship was still better than the alternative.
Mallory Underwood, Founder of More You and Co-Founder of Business Unbound, shares her story of juggling cross-country moves, two toddlers, and an insatiable craving for connection. Despite a fulfilling career in the nonprofit sector, life circumstances kept nudging her toward a new path—one that would once again light up her soul.
She charted a new course, creating a location-independent agency of Online Business Managers. Though it's been a rollercoaster, she's created a life that offers more autonomy over her day, more money in her bank account, and more time for her family.
In this episode, Mallory reflects on working from home long before it was cool, why it's anything but selfish to demand "more you," and the comma that changed the course of her life.
For more inspiration, subscribe to Unbound Turnarounds on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to podcasts!
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Transcript
Introduction to Unbound Turnarounds
00:00:02
Speaker
Welcome to Unbound Turnarounds, a podcast all about the challenges women business owners think about constantly, but rarely voice. We're Nicole and Mallory, entrepreneurs, friends, and co-founders of Business Unbound, a community helping women alleviate the headaches, heartaches, and backaches so work actually works for life. This is your safe space for the ups, downs, and the turnarounds.
Mallory's Career Transition
00:00:31
Speaker
Hi everyone, this is Nicole, and today I'm talking with my co-founder Mallory about her decision to leave a blossoming career in nonprofit leadership and become a virtual assistant, and then eventually the founder of her own agency. Her goal was to quiet that voice in her soul that just said she was working on the wrong things in the wrong kind of way.
00:00:52
Speaker
So I'm really excited for that conversation today. First, I just want to say, hey, welcome. And I am excited that we're still in the Whitefish, Montana together. Yes, we are. We are still together. And I think one of the cool things about this weekend is that we've kind of been practicing what we preach in the sense of we're here to work, but not in a way that overtakes our life. So we're still putting life first on a work trip.
00:01:21
Speaker
And what has that meant so far? We've done anything fun? Well, working with you is fun. Oh, that's very sweet. Thank you. Okay. So we've had coffee, iced tea, and pastries and a lot of cafe time, cafe work. We did a little mini shopping break. We did. I did some damage. You were very self-restrained.
00:01:45
Speaker
And then we just got out of the hot tub. We did just get out of the hot tub and it was so dreamy. And I'm excited because tonight we're going to dinner at a local cidery. Which is your new favorite thing. Which is my new favorite thing this year. Yep. I'm probably up above 20 different ciders for the year. So excited for that. And we've been doing some work in between, but you're right. We have been taking rest times and breaks, keep our head fresh and our creative juices flowing.
00:02:15
Speaker
And to just hang out with each other, which is one of the things we like to do.
Personal Highs and Lows
00:02:19
Speaker
Exactly. So one thing I want to start with today is kind of what we like to do when we see each other, which is to do a high low. So giving me something that was a bit of a low last couple of weeks and then something that really picked you back up.
00:02:34
Speaker
Yes. Okay. Lows like to get the lows out of the way. So for more than just the last couple of weeks, I have been dealing randomly for me with low back pain and it just kind of like came on and I was trying to do all the things. Got a new chair for my office workstation at home. Saw the people did all the things in the mornings, the stretches and the things and wasn't really making headway.
00:03:04
Speaker
But I think, and I'm going to knock on wood, that it might be over, at least for now. Just like it came on. It just sort of came off. And I'm like one and a half weeks in with minimal pain. We'll take it. That's a good reprieve. Yeah. I'm just going to hope that's the best. That's kind of a high and a low, actually. Yes. Currently going better. Yeah. So has my low turned into a high?
00:03:27
Speaker
No, but my real high was that before this trip, I got back from a husband and Mallory only. So no kids vacation, which like doesn't happen. Logistically is like a huge thing to figure out.
00:03:44
Speaker
as an early 40th birthday trip for myself. I loved that. Tropical. We escaped to the Bahamas and it was glorious. You sent me pictures. They were perfection. And I think my favorite part was that you got to meet Paulina. And who was that? Paulina was a pig and she swims. They have the swimming pigs in the Bahamas. We were on the outer island. So I don't know if those are the normal swimming pigs, but they had the swimming pigs. She was just a little piglet. She was a doll.
00:04:14
Speaker
I love that. What about you, highs and lows? Highs and lows. I think the most recent low was probably a decision to rehome one of my horses. And that was really tough. So there were some tears.
Emotional Challenges and Reflections
00:04:30
Speaker
There's a lot of angst about it, and it's one of those things where, because of the kind of person I am, it feels like failure, even though if anyone else were to tell me the same thing, I would assure them it was not.
00:04:45
Speaker
But it's just simply not the right horse for me long-term. And I just needed to accept that. So he's still with me. I need to make a plan for him, but that was tough. I've never ever parted ways with one of my animals before. And if you haven't listened to episode one, we talk about Nicole's need for perfection and the lack of failure. So you can enter need for all the horses.
00:05:12
Speaker
So that was a low. I'm hoping maybe the next couple episodes, I will have found the perfect place for him and I can turn that into a high. So we shall see. For highs, I think for me, I have been pretty bad about leaving Montana the last couple of years. So it turns out once you move to the place that you love to vacation, you don't really go on vacation anymore. That was still COVID-y time. So you get a pass. That's true.
00:05:41
Speaker
So this year I wanted to be really intentional about leaving the state, seeing my friends that don't live here. And so this year I've been traveling a ton. I did a solo road trip to Arizona and then recently got back from a trip to California. So got to see some of my best friends out there and have more plans for the year, including a trip to Ireland and...
00:06:08
Speaker
Yeah, that's the highs and lows for me, but I'm really excited today because your story is what's great on its own, but it's also so different from mine that I think
00:06:23
Speaker
people who could relate to me, there are different people who can relate to your story.
Life-Changing Experiences in Australia
00:06:29
Speaker
So excited to hear about that. And I think where we should probably begin is a little bit further back than my story because your life took a big shift when you were around, I think a junior in college. So what were you up to?
00:06:45
Speaker
So I was in Michigan where I was born and raised going to Central Michigan University. I'd only been overseas once before on a high school trip and so I don't know, I decided I was going to be a traveler and decided to study abroad. So I packed up and took myself, me myself and I, to Western Australia
00:07:08
Speaker
and was planning to spend six months there for one semester of my junior year in college within a week. I met this Canadian kid, a boy, a boy, I met a boy. Now my mom, before I left for Australia, my mom said, do not fall in love with any Australians. It's too far away. Oh, so she jinxed several months. And I said, well, mom didn't fall in love with an Australian Canadian with a Canadian.
00:07:38
Speaker
So anyway, we stayed together after these six months. He stayed and finished his degree down there. We did long distance. I know this is an entrepreneur podcast, but I promise it all relates. Yes. So then we did long distance. But when he graduated, I was still in school in Michigan. And he went back to Western Canada, where he lived, to start working. And then I graduated. And I thought, oh, this is perfect. I'll get a job.
00:08:07
Speaker
In Canada, I had this job offer. This company was going to sponsor me. We're finally going to live in the same place so we could see what the relationship was like in person. Mind you, we'd been speaking a lot, communicating a lot more than maybe we would have had. We've been in person, so we had this really great base of a relationship. So we knew we were going to be together, but I applied to move to Canada, which is, if anybody has ever dealt with immigration, it is a whole thing.
00:08:32
Speaker
whole big thing. So I applied and we're waiting for the application to get approved and we get this letter back saying I was denied entry. That's a real blow to the plan. There were tears. You know, you're young and in love and you think this is your ticket to be together.
00:08:48
Speaker
So then we did hire an immigration attorney. Mind you, we don't have a lot of money. So we did hire one and he explained to us that actually that wasn't the law. The new immigration officer who had our case had misinterpreted it due to the placement of a comma. Oh no. And this is a podcast about watching your grammar.
00:09:13
Speaker
The law is that you need four years degree or you need two years of a degree and two years working. So either way, four years total. But he interpreted that I needed either four years or two years of education and two years of working. I see. I see. Because I didn't have the two years of working. Sure. So we didn't have the money to appeal it. So we pivoted, which you do a lot in entrepreneurship. This was my first big pivot, I guess, of my life.
00:09:41
Speaker
And we then eventually worked on bringing him to the US, which as things do hindsight has worked out well. Yes. And we will circle back later on how I ended up back in Canada. So when you got that news and you decided, hey, we don't have the money to appeal this, what was your thought process of turning that problem into something that would work for both of you?
00:10:03
Speaker
You know, I think that it's like I don't, okay, this happened and it really sucks, but I'm
Nonprofit Career and Immigration Struggles
00:10:11
Speaker
also still going to make it work. Like there was no option for it not to work. And I think it ideally will be your mindset in business too.
00:10:20
Speaker
sometimes you can get in your own way or sometimes you need those grievance periods to grieve what you thought it would be and then you can pick yourself back up and move forward with a new plan. That's right. So where did you guys end up then? So then I started looking for a job in the US and found one in Indianapolis.
00:10:40
Speaker
So like three and a half hours or so away from my hometown. And so I moved down working in, you know, you just get a job, whatever you can, first thing out of school, right? You just get a job. It was a nonprofit. I was making like $34,000 a year. And I moved down in the fall of like 2006, something like that.
00:11:01
Speaker
And the plan now was then, and this was like, there's some time in between here, but he was going to come down on a fiance visa. And we were just going to get married sooner than we had planned. We thought we would build up some money first, but we didn't. No, we did not. Yeah, you did not. You struggled through it.
00:11:19
Speaker
Yeah. And I was the sole breadwinner because when he come down on a fiance visa, you can't work for three months after you get married. So he came down on February 4th of 2007. And I know that because it was the day the Indianapolis Colts were playing the Super Bowl and they won. Oh, wow. And that was the day he had moved in and we were watching it with all our friends and family that we knew down there.
00:11:43
Speaker
And then we got married at a small ceremony like two weeks later. So you were the breadwinner. I was the breadwinner whooping. Yeah, but you probably got pretty good at pinching those pennies. Yeah, those years in the beginning, making it work. And how did you feel about, so you just kind of got a job, right? And it wasn't necessarily something you were
00:12:03
Speaker
passionate about at the time or that's not why you took it. You took it because you needed to make an income. So was that something that you struggled with at that point mentally? I mean, this was my first job out of school. So maybe I just thought this is what it is to work, but I never connected deeply to it.
00:12:22
Speaker
It was okay, but I only stay there like a year and a bit. And I was looking for something else, which leads me to my next job, which was still in Indianapolis. And I was still in the nonprofit sector, but this time it connected back. I was really connected to the mission. I ended up working for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society, which is a national and multinational, I guess they're in Canada too, health or nonprofit.
00:12:46
Speaker
And my brother is a long time, basically a lifetime survivor of leukemia, ALL. And I feel like, well, one, that helped me connect to the mission to be able to be passionate enough to get the job. But then I feel like I really had, it was like one of those full circle moments. I had this understanding now by working with the survivors and the patients that we interacted with.
00:13:15
Speaker
of what my family went through because I was young. He was diagnosed when he was nine and I was seven and then it was like a six year ordeal and it was very, very rough, very bad. You probably didn't process it as a child, right? I still have an answer to that. Yeah, I mean, now later you were probably seeing that in a much different light because you're seeing it through adult Mallory eyes. Right.
00:13:37
Speaker
of what my parents were doing. I mean, this is like the worst thing you can go through. One of the worst things you can go through with a kid. I really was deeply connected to the mission and I loved it. The culture was so fun. We have this young staff, primarily women, working our tails off for little money.
00:13:57
Speaker
But doing all the things because in a nonprofit, there's no such thing as like, you do this, you do that. It's like everybody kind of just things to get it done because there's limited funding. So I learned a lot. I was working in fundraising for the team and training campaign and got to like help people fundraise for endurance events and train them. So I got to travel all over the US too for endurance events and then became an endurance athlete too, because
00:14:25
Speaker
Right. You were in the world already. Yeah. This was really, really fun. I had a great community. I really loved it. And so I'm curious, did you find that you gravitated towards that kind of work environment that was mostly women? Is that something that you've always felt connected to?
00:14:43
Speaker
Yes. So I think, yes, growing up in sports and having that team dynamic of women, of girls at the time, and then transitioning into this work culture. And if you connect through my life, these threads of always having these groups of women that I was intertwined with, and they've always been really influential and powerful to me. And so it just, again, here's another full circle of coming back to Business Unbound and what we're creating and why I'm so passionate about it.
00:15:13
Speaker
I'm a little bit envious, to be honest, because you had these experiences early on working with a lot of women. And for me, I was in a male-dominated industry, working at a company with quite a few men that mostly all the leaders were male. And it was just a different experience. Luckily, many of them were great and good mentors for me, but it just sounds like such a different
00:15:39
Speaker
vibe to be able to work with a group of women. I imagine it probably was. Yeah. And so now making my own company, that's something that I've done. I only work with women on my team now. I fixed it. It's something that I definitely envy about your story is that you had that thread all the way through.
00:15:57
Speaker
Yeah. And I mean, the leadership was in my circumstance, women, and seeing them step into these roles and really have ownership and leadership. They were mentors to me. They were role models. So I had it on a colleague level and also above me, which was really helpful.
00:16:16
Speaker
Well, see, I love that. I have memories of trying to think of women in the organization that we could have speak at events. And it was tough. For shifting that. The world is shifting a bit. But yeah, I mean, this was a little bit ago. Yeah. So how long did you stay in this role? So I was only there for a couple of years by choice, but not my solo choice.
00:16:41
Speaker
So at that point then for my husband, his name is Stefan, so we made the decision together to follow his career and move to Colorado. This felt really difficult. I remember brawling. I had this whole community and I was training for an endurance event. I was also the staff member for it at the time, a triathlon.
00:17:04
Speaker
And I was deeply connected to the little girl and the little boy who were our honored heroes, who were doing the events for in conjunction with my brother. So I had this little trio of people I was doing the event for. And the event was in Wisconsin. We drove out in our car with our car loaded to move.
00:17:27
Speaker
And we went to the event, my family came out to watch me and then they all went home and we kept going to Colorado. I was just bawling. It was really hard. So this was my first time of leaving an intentional community that I had made and it was difficult.
00:17:42
Speaker
But we felt so good. We were moving to the mountains from the Midwest. This is where we wanted to be and what we wanted to do. But this was my first cross-country move. It was very hard. But we did it and we moved out. We bought our first house and we landed there. We were settling in. I'm curious how it felt to make that decision to follow his career versus yours.
00:18:06
Speaker
I don't think it probably felt like a versus, but I am curious what that conversation looked like. I think it was because we didn't feel connected to the Midwest as much anymore of like geographically where we wanted to live. So he got the offer to move somewhere that we thought we wanted to be. And so it was more about getting there and then I could find something. And they did have an office there. So I was considering that too.
00:18:35
Speaker
But because I left my endurance community, it's a lot harder to train for events. And the chapter there was a little bit further away. And so I stopped doing those events. But what I did get from Colorado was my next batch of community, largely women-based, and it was yoga.
Yoga and New Beginnings
00:18:53
Speaker
And I took my teacher training there, my certification, and got certified and was surrounded again by primarily another group of supportive women.
00:19:05
Speaker
And was yoga something that you had ever done before? Rarely. I mean, classes here and there, but it wasn't a huge part of my life. And was the community aspect something that drew you to teacher training versus just going to class? Like the rest of us? Correct. Because you don't get to speak to people as much. You can't really speak during the class.
00:19:27
Speaker
And then there's like the in and out, but as much as you try not to be clicky, I mean, people know each other and they're chatting in and out of the locker room and it's like, well, how do I get to be a part of that? I actually started cleaning the studio first for like discounted rates to go to class. And then was able to just do teacher training and drop the cleaning.
00:19:49
Speaker
Yeah, anyway, so that was something that I gained from Colorado, which I am very grateful for. And I ended up working in another small nonprofit there. But I am very grateful for the yoga because it was something that I was able to take with me from Colorado because we did not end up staying there that long. Well, if you hadn't have taken that yoga training, we never would have met.
00:20:10
Speaker
Oh, that's so right. So I'm very glad you did. You're right. Okay. So what Nicole's mentioning is that then I got certified and then the next year there was another girl that was teaching there. She was also from Michigan. And so we connected on that and we decided to host a yoga retreat together. We were new to teaching work, but because of my experience with team and training and traveling around and taking groups all across the country, I felt very.
00:20:38
Speaker
prepared. And so we planned this trip to Costa Rica. I mean, we are in our twenties. It's like you don't know to be scared. It just felt doable. It felt possible. So we went down, we did a little test trip, her and I, and then we went down like six months later with a group of 12 people.
00:20:57
Speaker
that we were responsible for in a foreign country. And I was one of them. And Nicole was one of them, and we hadn't met yet. I just will never forget. It was the best trip at the best time for me. So we should talk about an episode once. You can go back and listen to that. But origin story. Yeah. So you, what I remember is that on this retreat, you were in the midst of planning another move.
00:21:28
Speaker
So we moved to Florida. The job we moved to Colorado for just did not pan out for my husband. And so we were scrambling in a sense of like.
00:21:39
Speaker
Okay. Well, we can't stay here. He's a very niche industry. So we knew when that wasn't going to work out, we moved there for that job that we had to leave. And so through his network, it only took, I think six weeks or so from when that decision was made to find another job. We moved, this was our second cross country move from Colorado to Florida. So you had to leave another job. I didn't leave another job. I had to leave another community.
00:22:07
Speaker
Here I am crying again in the car as we're driving with all our stuff. This is a theme for you now. Yes. So never thought I'd live in Florida, although it was gorgeous. The Panhandle of Florida, we're right there with the beaches. So beautiful. You're a warm weather person. I love the water. Yes.
00:22:25
Speaker
And yes, so it was nice to live in the warmth for once. First time in both of, no, he lived in Australia longer than me, but first time long extended time in the warmth. Yeah, that's good. And you, so he had a new job. He already had it when you moved down. You had to find another job. Correct. So where'd you go? So I went to Costa Rica with, I, it was like a month later, flew down to Costa Rica, met all the retreat people.
00:22:54
Speaker
As I was there, only the other host and I had wifi in our room for emergencies. That's right. Nobody else had cause you know, it was a ways back. No one else had wifi. I mean, no phone, nobody was on their phones.
00:23:10
Speaker
But we had Wi-Fi because we were the contact in case anybody's family needed to get in touch with them. And so I got this email. It was like a blast email to, I think it was team and training alumni, people who had done the fundraising program, not even former staff.
00:23:26
Speaker
And it basically said that the human lymphoma society was starting a call center for their fundraising campaigns. So that instead of people calling in to the chapters to hear, please explain this funders or to me or whatnot, they would just call one place. We would explain it to them and it would save the staff members so much time and they could just focus on the fundraising.
00:23:46
Speaker
So I thought, oh my gosh, this is great. It's work from home because I live where I'm not going to be able to have a chapter there. And I can have all this experience. I have all the knowledge. I'm like a shoo-in. So it's while I'm on this Costa Rica retreat,
00:24:01
Speaker
I emailed my former executive director and told her I was going to send my resume in as soon as I got back and she referred me. And so I basically, I think, I don't know exactly in the backend, but I think it got it to the top of the list. And then there was a five or six of us who then got hired to start this call center.
00:24:18
Speaker
So thankfully, I was able to get a job kind of right away because of my past and I was able to start pretty soon after that. Did you worry about the fact that you were going to be working from home for the first time because you are a community minded person? I was nervous at first, not nervous. I was
00:24:39
Speaker
I had FOMO, I guess. I'm missing out and I'm in a new place. So how do you meet people? Right. So Stefan was in person. So we had some community there. It was a smaller community for his company, but there were some. And I joined a young professionals group. Okay. That's how I started making friends. And I got a really great friend that I still talk to you. And I think for me, listening to you, what I'm hearing is that you are very intentional about making your communities.
00:25:10
Speaker
Even when it's hard work, which it is, it takes a lot of effort, but that seems like the first thing that you do when you go somewhere. So that's always been important to you. I think that I feel
00:25:25
Speaker
I'm almost disconnected to myself without it, which sounds strange, but I don't feel whole without a community. Yeah, that makes sense. I think that connection is that important to me. Yeah. Well, yeah, you're right. Or everyone. Yeah. Some of us don't know that until later.
00:25:45
Speaker
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00:26:05
Speaker
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00:26:35
Speaker
So you did this call center, which seems to me very different than anything that you had done before. Type of work wise, is this something that you ended up liking or you, you were on a team, I remember, but is this something where you started the job and you were like, yes, you know what? Working from home makes everything worth it.
00:26:55
Speaker
No, not yet. No, not yet. Okay. So I worked my way up. We proved that it was successful. So it became a part of the organization. And then I worked my way up and was promoted like two different times to hire titles within that job. But it's very tech. It becomes very tech. Like at first we were just kind of making it work. And then as it became a proven concept, it is a tech job.
00:27:19
Speaker
It is all systems. It's all systems. And then there's numbers and reports and calls per hour and performance and whatnot. And to support as like being in a management role, you're constantly on like an IM or like an instant chat with your team because they're live on phone calls. So any support or questions they have, they're messaging you and you're looking it up or you're calling in or you're basically chained to your desk.
00:27:47
Speaker
for your work hours because if someone responds to you and they're on a call, they need you right then. But that way it doesn't make working from home sound that delightful. No, no. However, I will say I did end up, I think a year in, I was, well, this is a funny piece of it. I was planning my second retreat in Italy.
00:28:07
Speaker
And my husband and I had a trip planned. So we head over to Italy and we're visiting two or three different retreat centers. And on day like two of our European adventure, I discovered that I'm pregnant.
00:28:23
Speaker
That's right. That was your European surprise. So we found out that I was pregnant in Italy and no more alcohol on that trip. That's tough for Italy. Tough for Italy. And I remember the first person we told was the waiter at the restaurant that night.
00:28:42
Speaker
And we found out like Insita was pregnant. And so we say like Insita and he goes, Oh no, no, no, no, it's fine. It's fine. And he's like trying to have me drink like the complimentary red wine. And you're like, well, I don't know. Appreciate that. It's my first one. Like maybe I won't eat.
00:28:59
Speaker
but being pregnant, working from home. So at that point I was like very grateful. I didn't have to buy a new wardrobe. If you didn't feel well, you have the light slow. You had all I had on my water, all the food I needed and whatnot. And then when I had the kids coming back to work, same thing with clothes and we had a nanny come to the house. So I was able to just nurse.
00:29:20
Speaker
So easily, the baby was just coming to the office and back out. And so at that point, I was okay with giving up the social peace to be at home because it was such a gift. Okay. I got you. Yes. Yes. And I don't know how you would have done that particular job.
00:29:37
Speaker
and raised your kids at that point. I think that would have been very tough if you were not from home. This is what women have to do. I mean, we could get into it. We won't, but you know, I live in Canada now. It's a very different situation. And I think it's a huge disservice to our culture in the United States that these women, we get three, three months. It's a joke because you're not thinking clearly you're sleep deprived and it causes, I think a lot of,
00:30:04
Speaker
issues further down the road and higher rates of women, you know, postpartum issues and less nursing for longer. Cause it's very difficult. I probably would have just made sacrifices. Like you have to make it work, right? But where you stop working and you downsize and you do that, you know, or you stop nursing or you are just struggling through, which kind of.
00:30:28
Speaker
Even working from home, you're still tired. I was deeply grateful at that point, yes. And that seems like probably the first time that the scales tipped a little bit for, I'm willing to give up some things in order to have more flexibility, more freedom in my day. This was the first inkling of, okay, now that I have children, I will not give up this work from home thing.
00:30:51
Speaker
But that kind of leads to then what happens next. You stayed in Florida forever, right? Same job. No, that's not what happens to you.
00:31:00
Speaker
We were there four or five years. So I just had my second child. And no, before I had her. So she was born in the very beginning of April. In January, my husband gets an offer from his same company to move to a leadership role. And this was something we had been thinking about because he didn't have normal work hours with what he was doing. And we were just thinking, how is this going to eventually work?
00:31:28
Speaker
so that you can be around more in the evenings and weekends. The kids, yeah. And so we didn't really have an answer. And then as life happens, this presented itself. And we said, oh my gosh, yes, we have to take it. That was in January, and I was however many months pregnant. So they allowed him to take the job and start working from Florida. But the job was located in Phoenix, Arizona. Not close to Florida. It's really not. No.
00:31:57
Speaker
So on my very imminent future was have a baby, April, and then move two weeks later during my maternity leave, two months later. So we moved to Phoenix, which if you're keeping track, that's cross country move number three. This time with babies. And this time with children. And one was eight weeks old. Oh my goodness. So that was an experience. And were you then leaving this job for you?
00:32:25
Speaker
No, because how great that this was a work from home job. So this was benefit number two to working from home that I was like, oh, and it moves with you and I seem to move all the time. So like I, again, I can't lose that freedom. Right.
00:32:41
Speaker
Okay. So you took your job virtually to Phoenix and you kept doing that for how long? So then I put my brand new baby in daycare, but luckily we found this amazing all natural daycare right down the street from our house. So I felt okay about it.
Balancing Work and Motherhood
00:32:58
Speaker
And her son was able to go there until he started real school. So then about a year in, so she's a year and my son is four, we're going, okay, well, my son's going to be starting real school soon, kindergarten. And I'm hearing and I'm seeing from my friends who have older kids, like, there's a lot of days off. Right. There are, yeah, they're home a lot for going to school.
00:33:22
Speaker
Daycares, they go every day. Like nine to five or whatever you want. I'm still happy because at least I'm able to pump from home while I'm breastfeeding my daughter. And so that was great. You don't have to find a room. You just turn off your phone. You're not taking calls. So that was still really good. I didn't quite have the nanny experience, but still really good. And at this point, actually, I'm still nursing. I nursed her for a couple more months after that. And I just remember, though, thinking, OK, my baby's
00:33:51
Speaker
here and my son's gonna be going to school and I basically have to be at my desk. If I have a kid home sick I have to call in and there's limited days off for sick days and there's limited days off for vacation days and my husband's job is very not flexible now like he's in calls and in meetings and going in person he's at the headquarters for their whole company now he's there he's not anywhere near the house and
00:34:19
Speaker
How's it going to go when two of us have jobs that are quite demanding? Without having one parent who's flexible, it's really difficult. And so I was thinking like, OK, I think that I would like to be the one who becomes flexible. But how do I do that? I don't want to give up working from home. That wasn't really a thing then. It was hard to find those jobs. We're almost done. So that's kind of the why behind why I was looking for something else, but also,
00:34:48
Speaker
If you remember, I was saying how connected I was to the mission when I was with those people in person and I had that personal connection to it. But because I wasn't even talking to the fundraisers anymore, I was like two levels or three levels back from the mission. I was so removed from it that I felt completely disconnected. It was just a tech job.
00:35:09
Speaker
It was really hard for me to still feel like what I was doing was connected to the reason the organization exist. You were not emotionally invested anymore. No. And I was getting these like nibblings at my soul, what I call it, that I needed to shift. I needed to shift in what I was doing and all this energy I was pouring into this just wasn't filling me up. It was actually...
00:35:31
Speaker
Draining me right I was just like a less version of myself I was more of a shell shell and also I think it affected Like how I acted with my husband and my kids after work
00:35:44
Speaker
And I just knew, and you know how like your soul will nibble or your body or something will nibble, nibble, nibble, and then it gets bigger and bigger and bigger and then it finally just like crashes you down. And I think I had one of those moments and it was like a low, right? Like a rock bottom type situation. And I was like, okay, I need an out, but I can't give up this flexibility. So what can I do?
00:36:05
Speaker
And that led me to contact you. I mean, it'd been a while. We hadn't really stayed connected. It's the retreat more than five years. Yeah. But I didn't know anyone. And I think this is a really common theme for a lot of entrepreneurs who will be in our community is that.
00:36:23
Speaker
You don't know that there's all these people working this other way until you're in it. But how do you get into it? Or even once you're in it, like depending on what your job is, maybe you still don't have it. And you were literally the only person I knew. I mean, I have a cousin that has his own company. It's different though, like an actual company. This is like doing service based on your work.
00:36:49
Speaker
You're the only person I knew, so hit you up on whatever it was, Instagram. I mean, it was out of the blue. Hi, can I pick your brain? Right. Remember me from Costa Rica? I was like, yes, that was a pivotal time for me. I would be happy to do you this favor. Yes. And I was visiting my parents in Michigan and we
Starting a Virtual Assistant Business
00:37:10
Speaker
I had a call and I just remember, I do remember you telling me, it's not all roses. It is not. It's not all roses. And in, at the, I am fine to admit this now. At that time I thought, well, I don't give a shit if it's not all roses because it sounds a million times better than wearing it now. It sounds great. We're going to do it anyway. No, I really don't care. It's fine.
00:37:31
Speaker
And then I get it now, but again, it doesn't matter. They don't add up enough to not do it. You were, I think only the second person that had reached out to me about quitting their corporate job and going freelance. And I just like your community all the time. Like that's who you are. It's like through and through who you are. For me, I'm kind of.
00:37:59
Speaker
I guess a bit more surgical doesn't sound like the right word, but a little bit. Like one starfish at a time, that's like what my energy can do. But when someone reaches out to me and they're like, I'm thinking about leaving a traditional job, my soul lights up. Like I'm just like a Christmas tree. I just like, the answer is always yes. You can absolutely quit. You can absolutely do it. I'm going to tell you everything that ever happened to me so that hopefully you can skip it. Skip all that bad stuff.
00:38:28
Speaker
But the answer is always yes, because there's going to be plenty of people in their lives with traditional jobs.
00:38:36
Speaker
that are probably nervous about that for them or don't understand it or don't know how to support it. And I didn't know anyone either. So for me, if someone reaches out and is like, I'm thinking about this, like that just made my year when you were like, I think I might do it. And I was nervous. You were so nervous. I was nervous to contact you.
00:38:59
Speaker
But those lessons, we are going to put those in our course library. So honest to God, we want to shorten the gap between. I want to save everyone from everything that ever went wrong. We literally are going to tell you all of these best practices and tips and tools we have used because we don't want you to be miserable. You started this job for a reason. You started this lifestyle for a reason, and that reason probably still exists.
00:39:21
Speaker
But for some reason there's a disconnect to being like the reality of loving it. Right. And so all those lessons we are going to share, but I think that is something actually I remember you really loved supporting people leaving their jobs. Oh my God. It's my favorite thing. And you had like a slide deck and you sent it to me and you were like, okay, we can do it. Well, so what ended up happening was as you do, you go down rabbit holes online. Cause I'm just thinking like,
00:39:49
Speaker
googling everything I can find about like virtual jobs, remote jobs, work from home. And again, it's just such a different time than it is now. And I found this online course about how to be a virtual assistant. I didn't even know what that was.
00:40:04
Speaker
It was new. VA, Veteran Affairs, that's what I thought it was. It was new. It was fairly new. And the course was not that expensive. And I was like, oh my God, this is the answer. Because it's like, you have to be organized. You have to respond to people. I'm like, this is what I've been praised for my whole career. Everybody is like, you're so organized. You never forget that you're so reliable. You literally are so organized and you never forget anything. I will attest to this.
00:40:29
Speaker
And I was like, oh my gosh, it's a job for my skill set. So I bought the course, I did the course, and mind you, I have a four-year-old and a one-year-old. So what is it about that that busy people end up doing the most things? I don't know. I did the course and building my company was between 8 p.m. and 11 p.m. on Monday through Friday and a little bit of time on the weekend that my husband could buy me. This is when my company was built and it was tiring.
00:40:57
Speaker
But what ended up happening was I started this VA company and I talked to Nicole and then Nicole ends up being my first client. I think I told you on the phone that first day, I was like, because you were worried about how you would find clients. And I was like, no, I will literally hire you. I don't know what you will do exactly.
00:41:19
Speaker
but like you're a person I need in my world and I will hire you. Like don't worry about finding your first client. Oh my gosh. It's such a blessing you are. So I started that course in August and by December I had everything and everything set up and Nicole brought me on December in 2017 when I officially started my company as a freelancer, right? Like I've never had an employee. I probably never will, but as a freelancer and it was good for you and it was so wonderful for me. Yeah.
00:41:46
Speaker
Cause I had never worked with you, right? I only knew you from a yoga retreat, but that was enough time to know that you would be such a good addition to my business and my life. Oh, I am technically, I mean, I'm still working. You are still working for me. Yeah. It's been years. You changed my life. It's like a well oiled machine now. Yeah. What did your husband think about this plan to go do your own business?
00:42:12
Speaker
He was supportive. But it was a leap of faith. And honestly, people may think this, but if they don't have the support of at least one person, I mean, I had him, I had you. Like you said, like family didn't really get it. But because I had two people like, yeah, that makes sense. Of course you could do it.
00:42:31
Speaker
It gave me the confidence to do it. And we do want to be that for other people. I think most people in our community are already going to be in their roles, but there might be pivots and things where we can be that support for each other because without it, you could easily just simmer down soul. Like I'll deal with you later and just stay where you are. Were you just, in my case, I had felt so alone with my business for years, even though an amazing person supporting me still works for me.
00:42:58
Speaker
But it was before I had you and I was still doing too much. I was still involved in too much of the day to day. And I kept too much for my team. If anything was wrong, I felt like it was on me to fix it. And it just was so lonely. I still remember like going on dog walks with my mom and just crying because I was so alone with the stress of my business. And I no longer feel that way. And that was because I found you.
00:43:28
Speaker
Yay. Well, I have had so many referrals from you and have a whole network in your community now, so I feel the same. But yeah, so love fest end. Sorry, everyone. Okay. So now I quit my nine to five, like three months later, because doing part-time work is really hard while you're also working full-time.
Expanding into an Agency
00:43:47
Speaker
I quit that to move to full-time, so like three months later, two months later. And then by that summer, I was just like, holy crow, I am really busy and this is overwhelming. Oh, it's a lot. And how did that happen? And I also leaned on support. I found some of the women who had left from LS to be stay-at-home moms and I just randomly called them up one day in June and I said, I have no idea if you want something.
00:44:16
Speaker
But a little piece of the mom and me thinks that maybe you might want something that isn't attached to your kids. And they both were like, Oh my God, you're a prayer answered. I need something. And so I just brought them on and I just fumbled my way with them. And they're both supporting me in different ways now, but they're still with me. Like we're supporting each other and we figured out this agency thing. And you'd seen it like that was how I was working. And you were like, I think something like this can work.
00:44:46
Speaker
For me, you start something, you worry that no one will hire you and then you get way too busy. And you're like, actually the new problem is I can't do it by myself too much. And so then I became an agency and then that following summer I rebranded and then we became online business managers. And that was such a great lesson to invest in your business because
00:45:08
Speaker
Now the website, the dream client was identified. Now we were starting to get the right people. The website was selling for me. When I would get on sales calls, they were like basically ready to say yes because the wording was right. And that was my first big lesson of like, oh, pay for people who know things that you don't know because it will actually be a return on that investment.
00:45:30
Speaker
Yeah. So we did that. And then I just realized that the freedom of my schedule was like the best part of this, but I still felt like I had to take every job and say yes. It doesn't feel safe initially. No. And I, I hired some contractors that didn't work out and I also, because I needed staff or staff in quotes.
00:45:51
Speaker
And I said yes to some clients that I shouldn't have. And I think the lesson there was even though I didn't have a lot of experience in this role yet, I had an intuition and a knowing that I ignored. That's right. You call them red flags and I call it like a little sacral nod, like a little sacral knowing deep in your gut. And I ignored them many times. And the lesson there is to not. Don't do that.
00:46:19
Speaker
It's like you needed the confidence first to know that you could say no. So that was my first big takeaway of that. And anyway, my kids started school and the flexibility was great. And then March, 2020 happened. COVID.
00:46:35
Speaker
And as you speak to different people, if you speak to my husband versus me, people have different experiences. If you were to ask me, I would say it was horrible. We were in Phoenix. It started in March, but then, you know, a lot of lockdowns and things were like May, April, and it was hot. It was hot. And then you had the kids. I had them and they were home and I was trying to work.
00:46:57
Speaker
And my team members were all moms with kids home. And so it was like everything that wasn't a necessity went away. No more social posting, no more blogging, no more pitching to new clients. We can't take them anyway. We don't have to literally take care of each other, my team, and our current clients that we have. Just take care of each other and get through. But I realized in hindsight that the reason, I think one of the reasons why it was so difficult for me, besides balancing all that,
00:47:26
Speaker
was that the three values I've identified as a person are connection, we've talked about, freedom or spaciousness, and experiences. And literally, in one foul swoop, they were all three gone. And it took me processing time to realize, oh, okay. This is why I feel this way. That is why it was so hard for you. I mean, it was hard for a lot of people for different reasons, but for me, that was one of the pieces.
00:47:52
Speaker
So we get through that and we decide in January of 21, so not even a full year since COVID that we're going to do big move number four. And in one place too long now. Been in Phoenix for five years. And leaving Florida was hard. I had a really good friend there. And then now we make the decision to leave Phoenix. We have this bubble family that we spent the whole year with every other weekend that we just decided to bubble with.
00:48:19
Speaker
And they have their three kids and we are my husband and I best friends with the husband in the life of that family. And so this was like leaving your parents or something. It was torturous.
00:48:35
Speaker
But we had made the decision to leave because my husband got permission to work from home. And I think that COVID kind of proved this concept and it was success when it was fine and everybody was anyway. And he could work anywhere. They had employees all over the world. And so we decided to move back to Canada where his family is.
00:48:55
Speaker
And you watch those commas this time, right? Yes. OK, good. No commas. No commas stuck. A lot of proofreading. They really tried, but no, they didn't. It still took a year of paperwork because of immigration. But I was coming through on a permanent residency application with my husband because I was married to him. So it was kind of a she-win. So we get the permission to go and we do this move in June of 21. Well, a cross-country move
00:49:25
Speaker
with two children during what is still very much COVID was a huge undertaking. And I am so grateful. While I'm so grateful I had my entrepreneurship job during COVID, because I was in that role, because I had my company, I think, I'm not kidding Nicole, I think it was six months of preparing for the move.
00:49:47
Speaker
I remember seeing the spreadsheets. It was staggering. Because I'm a systems person. It was a project management system that was literally just for the move. And everything was assigned to me. Of course. Yes. I'm just going to assign these all to myself. Perfect.
00:50:04
Speaker
Not nerve-racking. Not overwhelmed. Then we had to do the move and leave and it was gut-wrenching. It was one of those things that, you know how deep down, 100%, it's the right thing to do, but yet you still don't want to do it. I don't want to do it. That was how it felt for me.
00:50:19
Speaker
And I still, to this day, it was right for our family and I still didn't want to do it. And we left our friends. It was horrible. It was so hard. And we do the cross country move. I drive three days with my kids in the car. My husband drives a truck because you have to be with your stuff at the border. It's a whole thing. But because I was in this job, I was able to do the six months preparing, do the move, and then the six months.
00:50:41
Speaker
On the other end, getting settled because if you were able to take your job with you. Yes. So we write people to consult with who knew the laws and the company was able to stay the T the contractors in place, the clients, everything. So it came with me. And what a, what a gift.
00:51:00
Speaker
So then same clients, same team members. I had the time to manage the move. I had the time off for the move and I had the flexibility to work when I could and needed to until I could get like this port and place in my new community, which is a huge thing. Yes. But then last year, the company turned five.
00:51:19
Speaker
Which is huge. It's huge. It hit its first revenue milestone. Now the machine's just working. Revenue milestone. It's running. Yeah, it's running. And I'm bored. Turns out Nicole has brain injury too. And we just start chatting one day.
00:51:37
Speaker
What if we're bored? And what if we didn't do all the things separately, but we just did them together? Yeah. What if we stopped being bored together? And that was like last fall. And so we decided to start Business Unbound because we are both passionate about supporting women entrepreneurs. And we like starting, right? So that's the other thing is like,
00:51:58
Speaker
When you think about doing something new, I don't think about joining something that never crosses my mind. I think about, Oh, well, could I start from scratch? That's where my brain goes. And I think that's where your brain goes. Yeah. And I think what we're going to do.
00:52:14
Speaker
Not that we did it before, but I think what we might do differently from other people is that we're going to do it our own way. And you absolutely have permission to do that in this world of this lifestyle business. We might not be on social, plastering our faces everywhere. And that's great if that feels genuine to you, but it doesn't for us. And so we're going to do things our own way. And I think because of our experiences.
00:52:36
Speaker
We have the confidence to do it this time around like that. Exactly. And we still have our other businesses. We still have our other businesses. You know, I mean, I have four or five things that I do, but yes, it's something where we, I think have discarded that sense of guilt and all the shoulds. And sometimes it's like, we'll have a conversation. So we're like, we probably should do this.
00:52:59
Speaker
And then it's like, I look at you and you're like, I don't want to do it. And I look at me and I'm like, I don't want to do it. So if we have to, then we will hire someone who loves it.
Launching Business Unbound
00:53:08
Speaker
Right. And we already have our, you know, an outline of a team in place or we will connect it back to the why. Actually, we think we should, but actually if we go back to the why we're doing this, support women entrepreneurs make their lives easier and better and supported. That doesn't actually have to happen. But I think.
00:53:26
Speaker
my biggest thing I want to tell people is listen to that intuition and that inner knowing. You may have imposter syndrome and that's fine. Everybody has it even years in of experience, but those little hits of intuition are actually a knowing of what's right for you. And it doesn't have to be right for everyone, but it's what's right for you in that moment. So don't worry about the imposter syndrome. Like tap into that and know that you can do it your own way and you've got it.
00:53:54
Speaker
And then we'll have your back. Yes. We'll have your back. The other thing is that, like you said, it's in this moment. So you can start something and have a business that works one way and you did it for that time in your life that way. That doesn't mean that's forever, right? You can feel trapped by your own business. And we've definitely been there.
00:54:14
Speaker
but you're always able to pivot. You're not trapped in anything. You don't have to keep doing your business the way you have been doing it. And we are going to talk about it. We have so many tips to share with you. We can't wait for you guys to have some of these nuggets and then to hear from you of what's worked and then share it with more people because
00:54:30
Speaker
Hey, we are all about this community over competition. There is room for all of us at this table and we're just glad to be here. More business owners, the better. We love it so much. We do. We do. I love you sharing the story. Like I said at the beginning, I think it's such a different path than mine for many reasons, but it's really clear throughout
00:54:53
Speaker
the journey that you took, the core pieces that keep driving you and you do such a good job of identifying what's important to you, what gives you energy, what like fills your soul. You know, that's who you are. And I think that every time you start something new job, different business of your own, you bring that now from day one because you don't question yourself. So I love to see that. I'm glad you quit.
00:55:22
Speaker
I'm glad when everyone quits. Good job, guys. Well, I honestly couldn't do without you. Thank you for your partnership. So I think going forward, you're going to hear more episodes from us this season about the different whys that women have going into entrepreneurship. Some are similar, some are not, right? And those whys can change over time. But what we really want to get into this season is what was that core motivation?
00:55:48
Speaker
for every different person it's different, but we're really excited to tell those stories. And then we're going to launch into a lot of seasons after that, dealing with specific challenges like money and time management and health, so much about health. And we're just happy to be here and grateful for you guys for listening. We'll be hosting together going forward. We'll be hosting together. All right. Thank you Mallory so much for sharing. All right. See you guys next time.
00:56:16
Speaker
Thanks for listening. Hop over to UnboundBoss.com to join our community and leave us a voice memo. We absolutely love hearing from you. If you like the podcast, please subscribe, leave us an Apple review, and share your favorite episodes with other women entrepreneurs. Talk to you soon.