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Tactical [Meal] Bite | Why is Asking for Help So Hard?
29 Plays19 days ago
What if asking for help isn't a sign that you're failing but one of the clearest signs that change is already occurring?
In this Tactical Bite (really it’s more of a meal) style episode, Cheech reflects on a recent injury that forced her to confront a lifelong pattern of hyper-independence. From the vulnerable process of admitting she needed help to discovering the unexpected joy of receiving it, she shares how one ordinary life event reshaped her understanding of resilience, identity, and community.
Together, you'll explore the hidden beliefs that make asking for support feel unsafe, why many of us equate self-reliance with worth, and how not asking for help may be your ego masquerading as self reliance. Along the way, Cheech offers practical tools for recognizing your own barriers, identifying safe people, asking more clearly, and practicing receiving in small, meaningful ways.
This episode is an invitation to rethink strength, not as carrying everything alone, but as having the courage to let yourself be supported. Join us in the process of change.
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Transcript
00:00:01
Speaker
Testing one, two,
Introduction to Asking for Help
00:00:02
Speaker
three. This is the episode on asking for help. Tactical by Kiara.
00:00:12
Speaker
You're listening to The Ripple Affect with your hosts Cheech and Nippy, a podcast that explores how individual change has the capacity to affect the whole. From neuroscience to donuts, we're two sisters with a deep curiosity for ancient wisdom and modern knowledge, and we're obsessed with learning alongside you because we don't know.
00:00:31
Speaker
Let's dive in.
Personal Story and Reflection on Help
00:00:34
Speaker
Welcome back to another episode of the Ripple Effect podcast. This might be a little more raw, but I'm going to start this episode with a story.
00:00:46
Speaker
It's how recently I came to better understand the process of asking for help and why it's so important for change. am Fell down the stairs.
00:00:59
Speaker
I fell down the stairs. I missed the last step and it was pretty traumatic. I twisted my, what I thought was twisted my ankle really bad, but it was like different. i twisted I've twisted my ankle really bad playing sports and kind of know that feeling, but landed on my back, hit my head pretty hard.
00:01:17
Speaker
Definitely cried out. he screamed pretty loud because my son immediately empathically started crying himself and it was a whole scene. Anyway, I laid there and put my foot up and...
Challenges in Seeking Help
00:01:27
Speaker
After a bit of ah care on its own my sister, Isa, you know her.
00:01:35
Speaker
My sister prompted me to go to urgent care, which I rarely do growing up in poverty with no insurance. It's just not a thing that I think about, but getting better at this. So went to urgent care.
00:01:49
Speaker
Eventually, kind of they said, well, it's just a sprain. And then they called me back and said, oh, it's probably a small fracture. But treat it like a sprain because it's so it's such a it's a speck fracture.
00:02:00
Speaker
So this is the first broken bone or any kind of severity of a treatment that I've had ah my body. I was... struck And this is why I'm sharing this for this episode is i was struck by this, what felt like a crossroads of a way that I, that I had handled it in the past.
00:02:19
Speaker
Things like being injured or needing help and support or not even recognizing that I needed help and support really was one path. and then choosing a different path, a different way of doing it.
00:02:33
Speaker
Let me be clear about that. So I really felt like there was this old way of doing things and a new way that I could possibly, maybe not see fully the picture of how to do it, but that there was an opportunity for change.
00:02:46
Speaker
And it was through this very acute injury, like my physical, you know i couldn't really walk that effectively. And I have ah in my household, 20 month old,
00:02:57
Speaker
It's a toddler. If you aren't familiar with kids, they're almost two, but they can't talk fully. They have a lot of strong opinions and a lot of energy and a lot of movement. So they're running around. And in fact, the urgent care doctor who I called back was like, well, I hope you don't have a job that you know requires you to be on your feet because you need to just rest this, you know stay off of it.
00:03:19
Speaker
And I replied to him. I said, well, I have a toddler. And he laughed. Yeah.
00:03:27
Speaker
completely ignoring the fact that that is a reality. Like that is my job and no, I can't stay off my feet. And he just chuckled. I don't really even, that's another topic of discussion about society and change and women's rights and motherhood in the home, you know, full-time moms. So we won't go there, but I was recognized even though he didn't, that I, this is an impossible situation. Yeah.
00:03:54
Speaker
to truly be like responsible parent and have this injury. So i
Community and Mutual Benefits
00:04:03
Speaker
did it. I asked for help to my community specific and it turned out to be easy to fulfill. And I was really struck by that.
00:04:13
Speaker
It changed me. And I wanted to use this time with you all in a tactical to help you Be able to do your version of what I did because of how much it impacted me beyond just the physical support that I actually got in that week that I needed to really help heal and stay off my foot. I want to back up because...
00:04:44
Speaker
me saying that, oh, I did it. I asked for help and people showed up. Like it's not that fucking simple. It really wasn't. mean, ultimately was, but there was a lot of steps before that. There was a lot of growth and pre-support I recognize.
00:05:01
Speaker
And I'm going to name a couple of those that I hope will be helpful. One, a support group that I was in for moms, this mom group that i'm a part Conejo Valley Moms, set up and it's called Real Talk with Moms. And it was a support group with a licensed therapist, a small group. One of the sections of it brought this up, like, what is asking for help?
Mom Support Group and New Perspectives
00:05:22
Speaker
And i had spoken up. I'm like, I need a lot of help. And i'm it's really hard to say that because it makes me reflect on myself in a negative way. Like, I shouldn't need this help. Or I, what does that say about me as a mom if other people can do this and I can't? And all of this basically bullshit, but it was real for me and it's very vulnerable. And inside of that group, there were other moms who raised their hand and were like, I will help you point blank.
00:05:55
Speaker
I will be on the list of safe people to call if and when you need help with whatever it is you're needing help with. It struck me in a way because it illuminated for me this belief that I've been carrying that i have a hard time in this motherhood. And so I'm expecting everyone else to have this hard time in this motherhood. And and even if they are like, that is secondary to the fact that they still want to help.
00:06:21
Speaker
And the second thing, i started reading this book, Nonviolent Communication. I'll put the author in the show notes because I can't quite think of it right now. He talked about presenting your needs as a gift, like literally like Santa Claus and how it shakes off all the non-necessary kind of all our our own baggage and shit that comes with asking for help or we over-apologize we think we're a burden and all this stuff. And so...
00:06:50
Speaker
he He really framed this like, no, no, your needs are a gift. You actually get to give them, you know, so asking for support, asking for help, this is a gift you're giving someone. And when I first heard that, i was listening to it in the audio book and i was like, and that doesn't really make sense.
00:07:06
Speaker
But somewhere in me, I was like, but trust this because the book is so good. up until that point, the author had just gained my trust in everything that he laid down about what he's talking about, how how to help humanity through communication.
00:07:19
Speaker
I was struck enough to use it. So was this combination that came into a dovetail for me inside that support group a few weeks before. had thought like, oh, I do need help.
00:07:32
Speaker
and And I do have something specific that people can help me with. This was something different than the hurt foot, but I i had that awareness. Oh, wait, this could be an experiment. I could do it.
00:07:43
Speaker
Flash forward, I had no idea that what I would gain from asking for support would be so uplifting for myself, my community and others.
00:07:58
Speaker
And this is what I mean. I asked these moms to come over. What happened was i experienced the mutual benefit Like I was receiving this support of chasing around my toddler and helping me with food. And so I could just kind of sit up and rest my ankle sorry, my foot.
00:08:17
Speaker
But I got to see them and I got to talk to them and I got to see their kids who I really enjoy. and I got to like experience what their level of care felt like to me.
00:08:30
Speaker
But I also saw the like reverse. They got to get out of the house and they got to be around me and my kid and in a different home and let the day go by faster. And then one of the moms I got to, you know, immediately turn around, not because it was a transaction, because it was so good to see her kids and be around them and they were comfortable with in my home and she needed to go somewhere the next couple days later. And i was like, drop them off.
00:08:53
Speaker
They were here a couple days ago. my son loved playing with them. Like do it again. And it was so reciprocal. And it was it was community and it was beautiful. I mean, truly, it changed me. It changed how I thought about my needs and asking for help and what it actually looks like to give Because up until that point, I think really giving was sacrificial in a way for me. and I really never put myself in the receiving mode to understand fully what it was like to receive. And don't even think I did it perfectly at all.
00:09:31
Speaker
Definitely my friend Jess was like, will you sit down and let me receive? help you like actually just receive, which was helpful, which was part of his learning process. It wasn't perfect by any stretch, but I did gain a lot from it. So this is why this topic feels alive in me right now. It's like this moment of of me realizing, wow, I actually need help. And wow, this is this is what what balanced, healthy, maybe help looks like and feels like. And it's it's definitely a a game changer and it's vulnerable.
00:10:04
Speaker
Asking for help ac requires vulnerability and vulnerability is often the doorway to change.
Vulnerability and Personal Change
00:10:12
Speaker
And so I outlined a couple of things. Naming the blockade. Like what is in the way, you know, before we ask for help, identify any internal blocks.
00:10:20
Speaker
So some possible blockades. I should be able to handle this. People won't show up anyway. you know, rejection. I don't want to be a burden. That's one of mine. If I ask, I'll seem weak.
00:10:32
Speaker
If I need help, what does that say about me? No one will do it right. It's a big one of control. think and i might as well just do it myself because it's going to take me longer to explain what I need rather than just do it myself.
00:10:45
Speaker
Other people have it worse. That's one that i I know from poverty mindset comes up a lot. Like, oh, this might be bad, but other people have worse. So I should just deal with it on my own.
00:10:55
Speaker
I can't ask unless I'm completely falling apart. Asking is reserved for when things are just out of control. This whole thing, sometimes the hardest part is not asking for support. Sometimes the hardest part is like admitting that something is not working inside of you. The self-reflection, the internal digging,
00:11:15
Speaker
well before even the ask comes out of your mouth. Like that's actually really hard. So if some of these blockades sound like you or you may have others, i just encourage looking for those. And identity is a huge part of this because asking for help can threaten others. An identity that we've built. If, for example, and these are all me. I'm the strong one. I'm the capable one. I'm the fixer. I'm the independent one. I'm the one that people can rely on, can come to. I'm i'm not needy. i'm i don't I don't need anyone.
00:11:46
Speaker
Those last couple might be like an older version of myself, but still it's like a it was a version of me. But their ego masquerading as self-reliance. Ego, what I mean by that is like an image that we're trying to uphold ah of a safer, more perfect, maybe version of ourselves that...
00:12:05
Speaker
is safer because it's more in control. it's ah It's an image that we've constructed that we want to put forward to others. This is the safe version. This is the version that's not vulnerable. This is the version that doesn't need anything. Like I don't have needs is something I've heard out of family member's mouth, that probably out of my own. And recently Issa said it.
00:12:29
Speaker
And I was like, no, that's not real. Everyone has needs. Human beings have needs. So to go from a person who doesn't ask for help to change and transition into someone who does, any kind of change has to do with that transition of identity.
00:12:48
Speaker
I am statements. I am not someone who asks for help into I am someone who asks for help. That's how something sticks can be helpful. So if there's a question that you can ask yourself, something to the effect of journaling or just kind of asking as you're driving, you know, what identity do I feel like I lose if I ask for help?
00:13:05
Speaker
The image I'm trying to maintain or What am I afraid of? What do I think people will think of me if they see me struggling? What what is that fear? Hopefully can open up in you to start to give yourself the grace of like, you can be many things.
00:13:20
Speaker
and And asking for help doesn't mean, it means what you want it to mean, which is what's beautiful about identity is it's malleable. So much of this podcast is is rooted in how we can change ourselves so that we can benefit the wider whole.
00:13:35
Speaker
Asking ourselves to be vulnerable well enough to change and having to include others in that change. You know, this is where asking for help becomes part of the change work. it it It asks us to release an outdated version of who we think we have to be.
00:13:51
Speaker
There's something to be said about the belief systems, identity, belief systems. It's all this like kind of deeper level work. But our resistance to asking for help often comes from beliefs we learned through personal, family, cultural, religious, gender experiences or or generational conditioning, all of that.
00:14:11
Speaker
People won't show up is a common belief. Needing help means I've failed. My needs are too much. You know, maybe you've heard these things from your parents. I have to earn support. Maybe this is something that's passed down because you're a woman or a man. Rest must be deserved. Support comes with strings attached.
00:14:29
Speaker
If I ask, I will be judged. If I receive, I will owe someone. That transactional nature of help and support. I am only valuable when I'm useful, right? I only give. I can't receive.
00:14:42
Speaker
There's a lot of fear in some of our belief systems, and we we want belief systems that help us feel safe. And some of these belief systems are directly contributing to making us feel unsafe in the very thing we need, which is support.
Gender, Culture, and Help Accessibility
00:15:01
Speaker
And so there's this deep fear of lack of support that can lead us to isolate, just tough it out. Going back to the story for me, I saw that pivot point because I was like, I can tough it out and just deal with this injury it's to minimize it. It's probably not that bad. And then to deal with whatever the repercussions of scar tissue or just having it be longer to heal. And that was where my little red alarm bells went off. Like I have to make sure this heals. I can't be handicapped and be the mom that I want to be.
00:15:34
Speaker
it just hit me. I was like, I can't, I can't do this on my own either. My reality in that is is facing that fear of not being able to be the mom that I wanted to be was stronger than some of these fears that come up from my belief systems. And I mentioned being a woman.
00:15:50
Speaker
And I think it's very, very valuable to look at this for a second because there is gender conditionings that can shape who feels allowed to need help and what kind of help feels acceptable and how that request is received in race and class and...
00:16:05
Speaker
immigration and economic status and all that shapes how we have access to help. So like ah oppression, I was don't know if that was the right word, but oppression can make asking for help more complicated and risky and unavailable. And so those are all important things to consider.
00:16:24
Speaker
Basically what I'm trying to get at is that like help is not equally accessible to everyone. Some people are not resisting help because of pride. They have like learned through lived experience that help was unsafe or unavailable or conditional or costly.
00:16:38
Speaker
And if you are that or if you see that in your life where someone's having a hard time with asking for help, that may like just be where it's at. So now pivoting to like some of the internal stuff that's going on with us that is at play. I'm talking about like independence, resilience and hyper independence. This idea that there is a difference between healthy independence and hyper independence and work.
00:17:05
Speaker
where this all ties into it. and it And it has to do with boundaries too, because healthy independence, we build confidence, it supports self-trust, helps us problem solve, it creates resilience and hyper-independence refuses support even when needed.
00:17:20
Speaker
like no thank you. It treats asking as weakness, it creates isolation, it turns survival strategies into an identity and says like, I cannot ask for help unless I'm dying.
00:17:31
Speaker
This is important because resilience is not the same as doing everything alone. a person can be strong and still need support. A person can be capable and still need help. And a person can be independent and still be deeply connected. And it overlays boundaries and support because support and boundaries are connected. so healthy support requires both openness and discernment.
00:17:56
Speaker
Unhealthy patterns sound like rigid boundaries. I don't need anyone. Overgiving. I will help everyone but never receive. Transactional help. If I accept, I owe you. And then there's like toxic support that you might be receiving or accidentally giving where help becomes control or it becomes shaming or it becomes overriding someone or you feeling overridden.
00:18:22
Speaker
Going into rescue mode, like you might be asking for help and someone comes in to fix you instead of listening or you're doing that. So so there's these unhealthy patterns. and But healthy support looks like honoring a person's agency and your own agency, asking what would actually help the person or making sure your future sure you're very clear on what would actually help you.
00:18:44
Speaker
Support that doesn't use shame, just doesn't shame the need, does not make the person feel incapable. and for you, like, don't shame your own needs. Don't beat yourself up just because you need help, right?
00:18:58
Speaker
Making sure that who we're going to is safe enough so that when we ask for this help, when they offer care, they're not taking over your life. They're not just overriding what you need. They're listening and helping you.
00:19:14
Speaker
I've been contemplating making this episode for a very long time. After i hurt my foot, that kind of became more apparent. But I think it's really valuable to look at some of the different kinds of help.
00:19:26
Speaker
One of the things that realized, like, I don't even know if I've ever been able to identify all the ways that I need help because it almost is like a mirage. It doesn't... come up in my mind very clearly that that's a possibility.
00:19:40
Speaker
And I thought maybe someone else needs this too. Just this huge list of all the things that classify as help. Sometimes I think people don't even ask for help because they don't know what kind of help they need.
00:19:51
Speaker
So here's here's a list. So some main categories of help. It could be physical help. This is what I needed. It could be emotional help, ah mental health help, practical help, financial, relational, household, parenting or caregiving, professional help, spiritual or existential help, crisis help, which I think is interesting. That goes back to like, oh, everything has to fall apart only if it's a crisis. Is it valid?
00:20:20
Speaker
And no, all of these things have equal weight. They're all just categories of ways we might need help as humans. There's also informational help, accountability help, community support, and validation or witnessing, to name a few. I'm sure you could probably write in and tell us other categories too.
00:20:39
Speaker
But I think what it boils down to is that most help falls into like one of like three deeper needs. I need someone to care for me. it's like emotional help, witnessing, comfort, validation.
00:20:52
Speaker
I need someone to help me carry this. That's like practical support, childcare, meals, money, errands, logistics. Or i need someone to guide me.
00:21:03
Speaker
Therapy, mentorship, coaching, education, advice, professional support. Again, there's probably a million different ways to frame this, but this is something to start thinking about. Create your own framework for what are the main buckets of categories that you find yourself needing support with? And what does that sound like? I need b blank.
00:21:26
Speaker
okay, this is it. We're in the homestretch in moving from giving to receiving. Part of that process of receiving is asking for help. And i do want to point out that it is a sacred process of change.
00:21:42
Speaker
This is so powerful and impactful. to move toward some of these more indigenous ways of being where we do get to drop our hyper-independence and lean in if they are available, lean into those who want to be there and who get a lot from being there for you.
00:22:07
Speaker
Everybody has needs. And that song, know, Lean on Me, i think that everyone does come to a point where they're going to also need. And it's not transactional.
00:22:17
Speaker
And if we understand that's sacred, and we understand that we're meant to move into that positioning, receiving, giving, giving, receiving, staying and receiving for long seasons of time, moving into giving when we can, that rhythm or that awareness provides the foundations and the platforms for change.
00:22:38
Speaker
And so here's a ah couple steps to start if you really feel out of your depth. I know I did. So this is what I kind of conjured up. The shift from giving to practicing receiving.
00:22:51
Speaker
Just think about it like practicing. That's step one. Practice receiving. And that is like any good sports person. Like I always say I'm a sports person. So any good sports analogy rather.
00:23:04
Speaker
Practices starts where you are. So if you've never played the sport, your practice is going to be very different from someone who has played their entire lives, but it's still practice.
00:23:15
Speaker
There's no stakes except for that you just are trying to improve a little bit and understand a little bit and hopefully have some fun doing it. To do step one, to make this shift and start the practice, just know that receiving can feel very vulnerable.
00:23:31
Speaker
Asking can feel very vulnerable. It's all just very vulnerable. But vulnerability is strength and it is evidence that change is occurring. So if you can practice saying not sorry, don't say sorry, say thank you.
00:23:48
Speaker
Express that it really helps. You know, you can use the words, I appreciate you. i do that a lot. I lean in. I'm like, I appreciate you, you know. And remind yourself that you don't have to earn.
00:24:00
Speaker
You do not have to earn support. it's It's intrinsic in being born. You deserve support. You really do. But then there is work. There is action.
Practical Steps for Asking Help
00:24:10
Speaker
So identifying and naming your need.
00:24:13
Speaker
I think this step's really tricky because if you have worthiness issues like yours truly, we need enough self-worth that says we're worth having needs and that they matter. So before asking, kind of identifying the kind of support that you actually need has to do with recognizing like,
00:24:33
Speaker
A, you do need it, and A, it's okay that you need it. If I'm having a hard time identifying what it is that I need, i can always work backwards and say, what am I struggling with? And that is very vulnerable.
00:24:47
Speaker
And from there, there are needs there that you do deserve to have help with. So asking yourself, do I need listening? Do I need advice? Do I need practical action? Do I need just reassurance? Do I need resources? Do I need rest?
00:25:02
Speaker
Do I need someone to take something off my plate? Basically just do I need and then fill in. so step three, identifying safe people. Not everyone is the right person for every need.
00:25:15
Speaker
You want to look to your circle, look for the people who listen without judgment, respect your boundaries, follow through, Don't shame your vulnerability because that can really shut you down if you're trying to practice and someone has their own shit that they're doing and they have their own issues with asking for help and they shame you. That can be like art scars. You know, if we have an artist blooming when they're little and we shame them about that doesn't look like a horse, like they'll never draw again. And that's something we can can do to each other in this kind of like ultra hyper independent culture. We can easily make it seem like it is just not safe to ask for help.
00:25:53
Speaker
And so do your best just to push through that and find the people who don't do that. um And also find people who can be honest without being harsh and have a like have a capacity to help, which is a tricky one because i automatically assume that my capacity is other people's capacity.
00:26:11
Speaker
So I feel like if I'm having a hard time, everyone must be having a hard time. And that is not true. People have hard times in different places and areas, but there is... like i want to say always, but...
00:26:22
Speaker
There is a majority of a time where people have giving that you won't be able to see because you're in your own mode, but they have a different mode. And that's the beauty about humans being different is that we all have different capacities. Now, step four, start small.
00:26:38
Speaker
Practice is best in small doses, especially at first. So practice asking for low stakes support. This is actually, I think, a part that was really contributing to the ability for me to get to the place where I hurt my foot to ask for support. I had been starting to do this process through low stakes and it had started in that support group with like, can I identify something as a mom that I'm having a hard time with and can someone help me with it? And those moms raised their hand, right?
00:27:08
Speaker
very difficult for me, very vulnerable for me, but I'd already kind of done that in small doses. So I think by the time I got to my foot and it felt bigger, I was able to lean on those trusted people. And so an example of low stakes support can be, and this is going to be funny, but like, can you grab that for me?
00:27:24
Speaker
I can't tell you how many times I've got like a baby in one arm, like a package trying to reach for something. Someone's right there. like Can you just grab that for me? Can you open that door for me? It's tough. So can you grab that for me?
00:27:37
Speaker
Can i talk something through with you? When we're trying just to get out of our heads and needing that emotional clarity, like, can I talk something out with you? Can you sit with me for a minute?
00:27:49
Speaker
Can you help me think this through? Those are all kind of ways in which we don't have to harbor all the responsibility for our own stuff. You know, therapy is expensive, but but friends are there.
00:28:02
Speaker
Not everybody has the type of family that's there, but some people do. So family's there. You know, the vulnerability of asking someone, can you check in on me tomorrow? Even me saying these, they feel big.
00:28:13
Speaker
So find your own example of something small. So step five is offer support also. One way to get into the rhythm is being aware that support is not only about asking, it's also about participating in community care.
00:28:29
Speaker
Ways that we offer support within our own capacity, right, when we have it, is checking in with people, bringing food, offering a ride, listening without fixing, um sharing resources, helping with logistics, celebrating progress, like,
00:28:44
Speaker
Thumbs up. High five. Like that's enough sometimes. Being specific about what you can offer. And this goes on both ways. Like when we're asking, being specific about what we need. That's why step two, that identifying what we need, what comes out of that should be something specific. Because then it doesn't let people have to guess and mind read, which...
00:29:07
Speaker
Trust me, it's just like better for everyone and it allows them not to do what you don't want them to do, you know? And I do this so I hope that this can help someone else. Like just stating what you need is not an ask.
00:29:21
Speaker
I sometimes will do this really weird thing where I'm like, oh, I'm i'm frustrated about this, that, nick this, and this. And I'm just kind of venting. And then my sis will be like, are you asking for support? Yeah.
00:29:34
Speaker
And I in my head thought that made me naming the list of things that were frustrating with me was asking for support. But no, it's a mind read. I want her to come in and recognize I'm having a hard time and and offer the help because it's vulnerable for me to ask.
00:29:48
Speaker
And so she'll like kind of see see the mess going on and be like... Do you need help, sis? Yes. Yes, I do. Clenched teeth. like Okay, be clear. What do you need? Brene Brown talks about being clear is kind.
00:30:06
Speaker
When you're asking or when you're actually giving to, be specific about what you can offer and what you need. Last step, give yourself another's grace.
00:30:18
Speaker
No one will get it right all the time. You can't get it right all the time. I can't get it right all the time. Jesus, like no one can get it right all the time. Like it's just not real. you know, people may offer imperfect help.
00:30:30
Speaker
That doesn't mean anything. Imperfect is is help. You might ask imperfectly. That's asking. That is a trek in the way. It is a step in the direction. it is practice.
00:30:41
Speaker
And you may need to clarify. You may have thought you said everything exactly how it is. But someone asking clarifying questions doesn't mean that they don't want to help you. You just may need to clarify. And you might need to just try again.
00:30:54
Speaker
Same thing. It might have fallen through. those People might not have shown up. But like that doesn't mean anything. it just means it's practice.
Concluding Thoughts on Help and Vulnerability
00:31:02
Speaker
Basically what I'm trying to say, asking for help is a learning process.
00:31:06
Speaker
I really hope that this can help in that learning. Asking for help is not weakness. It's a practice of being honest and being trusting. and it's vulnerable. And it's change.
00:31:20
Speaker
like Literally how we can change. Doing it, the process of it, the practice of it asks us to recognize our needs, make them real. It asks us to believe we are worthy of that support. And it asks us to let other people meet us where we actually are.
00:31:37
Speaker
And that's really beautiful. And I hope that you'll start the participation process.
00:31:44
Speaker
Asking for help is not a sign that we are failing at change. What if asking for help is one of the ways that change begins? And I feel that. I felt that from that experience. And I just want to thank all those mamas who and friends who came And answered the call when I did ask that I could have this shift in me. And I am different now when I ask for help. I feel different when I think about what I need. And I'm more eager to do it because I experienced the value of that exchange.
00:32:12
Speaker
Not that transaction, but of that exchange, that energy exchange. And it's really important to me now. I'm a person who practices asking for help. And it's messy. And it's real.
00:32:23
Speaker
And it's helpful. Signing off now. Thanks for listening.
00:32:33
Speaker
Thanks for listening to another episode of The Ripple Affect. We're looking forward to exploring a different facet of change with you next time. If you found value in this episode, please take a second to leave us a review and share with a friend.
00:32:45
Speaker
Every little bit helps the ripple go farther. Thanks for being a part of this experiment with us. Changing yourself changes the ripple. And what if a collective almost is good enough?