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“It’s President ‘CRAZY JOEY’S’ All American Values and Freedoms MUST GO!’ Sale!” image

“It’s President ‘CRAZY JOEY’S’ All American Values and Freedoms MUST GO!’ Sale!”

S6 E272 · AMATEUR NATION with Lou Santini
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63 Plays2 years ago

*TOPICS THIS WEEK:* 

  1. Trump whiners gonna whine.
  2. Planet Fatness loses the wrong kind of financial weight.
  3. “This Week in the Pussification of America”! including: Gen Z sadness, amateur children, and NYC has “Amateur Stations”!

*On “A la Carte”:* a warning to squatters, amateurs’ feelings about EVs aren’t making them better, and everything you already knew about Senate Majority Leader, Chuck, “Don’t worry, I’ll die someday!”, Schumer.

*On “3 Pro Things”:* A senator exposes the real reason Commie politicians want illegal amateurs in America, AOC gets exposed as the amateur she is—twice, and a funny song mashup you gotta hear.

*DRYBAR COMEDY SPECIAL:“Amateur Nation*”: https://www.drybarcomedy.com/lous

*SUBSCRIBE ON YOUTUBE*: for 60-second podcast previews!: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOh5fIZVQdT0VG2M59S0Vwg

*MORE*: https://www.lousantini.com/

*THE BOOK*: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08254WSV4

*Facebook:* https://facebook.com/lousantinientertainment 

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*Truth Social:* https://truthsocial.com/@lousantini3

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*GETTR:* https://gettr.com/user/lousantini

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Transcript

Silicone Shot Glass Promotion

00:00:00
Speaker
New Don't Be An Amateur Silicon Shot Glasses.
00:00:03
Speaker
They're virtually indestructible.
00:00:05
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Perfect for picnics, camping, and tailgating.
00:00:07
Speaker
Doubles as a wine stopper.
00:00:08
Speaker
Plus, they're dishwasher and microwave safe, odor-free, and non-toxic.
00:00:12
Speaker
Buy three and get your fourth shot glass free.
00:00:15
Speaker
These one-and-a-half-ounce shot glasses are available in classic red, classic blue, and turquoise-pink-yellow tie-dye blend.
00:00:22
Speaker
Go to Luzantini.com, Class Shop, and order your Don't Be An Amateur shot glasses today.

Honor and Remember Flag

00:00:27
Speaker
The Honor and Remember Flag is a nationally recognized symbol that sends a message of appreciation for the sacrifice made by our fallen heroes and their families.
00:00:37
Speaker
The flag flies at many NASCAR races around the country, and you can help honor our nation's fallen military members and remember the eternal sacrifice of their service by flying the flag too.
00:00:49
Speaker
Text FLAG to 71777 or visit honorandremember.org to learn more.
00:00:57
Speaker
Together, we remember them all.
00:00:59
Speaker
Welcome to the show.
00:01:12
Speaker
Welcome to the show.
00:01:18
Speaker
Okay, let's all shut up, please.

Podcast Introduction

00:01:20
Speaker
Warning.
00:01:20
Speaker
The podcast you are about to hear is often based on true events and people.
00:01:26
Speaker
It chronicles the dialogue and actions of random, anonymous, obnoxious, self-entitled, unintelligent, self-centered idiots.
00:01:33
Speaker
Attention whores, ignoramacists, dolts, clods, nimrods, douches, weirdos, drama queens, overly sensitive crybabies, and people who think they are better, more important, and special than the rest of us.
00:01:44
Speaker
In one word, amateurs.
00:01:46
Speaker
Amateurs.
00:01:47
Speaker
It's Amateur Nation with Lou Santini.
00:01:49
Speaker
Your language is offensive.
00:01:51
Speaker
I've only said the name of the show so far.
00:01:53
Speaker
Well, that's amateurs for you.
00:01:54
Speaker
Time to put on your big boy pants because on this show, we call attention to and call out the amateurs.
00:02:00
Speaker
The people who are doing life wrong.
00:02:02
Speaker
The speed bumps of life.
00:02:04
Speaker
The people that are in your way every day.
00:02:06
Speaker
The unintelligent, obnoxious, attention-whoring, self-entitled drama queen victim types who chip away at the moments of your life due to no self-awareness, common sense, manners, or social skills and are disturbing the flow of the pros.
00:02:19
Speaker
Hi, Mom.
00:02:20
Speaker
Oh, hey, Lou.
00:02:20
Speaker
Amateur Nation.
00:02:21
Speaker
It's not just a podcast.
00:02:23
Speaker
It's a movement.
00:02:24
Speaker
And this is episode 272.

Episode Preview

00:02:27
Speaker
It's President Crazy Joey's All-American Values and Freedoms Must Go Sale.
00:02:33
Speaker
On today's episode, Trump whiner's gonna whine.
00:02:36
Speaker
Planet fatness loses a ton of the wrong kind of financial weight.
00:02:39
Speaker
And this week in the pussification of America.
00:02:41
Speaker
Then a few more tasty anti-amateur bites in the a la carte segment.
00:02:45
Speaker
And we close out the show with three things done right on three pro things.
00:02:52
Speaker
Shouts out to Pro Nation first.
00:02:53
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Shouts out to Gary Howley, Michael J. Ontiveros, Lisa Unkafer, Nate Forshee, Bibby Arnold, and Matthew Fantone on Facebook.
00:03:02
Speaker
Olivia 1009 and Sarah Connor on Truth

Listener Shoutouts and Controversial Post

00:03:05
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Social.
00:03:05
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LilBird667, Roberto Silva slash Monkey, Jacob Grindrod, Cole Young, William Carver, Rob Singh, Don Ake, Granson Insta, and Wade Searle on Instagram.
00:03:20
Speaker
Your pro post of the week from Mikey's Glock 20 on Instagram.
00:03:25
Speaker
This.
00:03:26
Speaker
If the government told people to literally eat shit, there would be people online within hours telling us how great it tastes while posting their favorite shit recipes.
00:03:35
Speaker
They would be arguing how people who don't eat shit are radical conspiracy theorists.
00:03:40
Speaker
It's insane.
00:03:42
Speaker
Here's what's happening in Amateur Nation.
00:03:44
Speaker
As we go a little something like this, hit it!
00:03:47
Speaker
Step one.
00:03:48
Speaker
Topic number

Comparing Legal Injustices: Madoff vs. Trump

00:03:49
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one.
00:03:49
Speaker
Topic number one.
00:03:51
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So let me get this straight.
00:03:53
Speaker
Bernie Madoff, responsible for the largest Ponzi scheme in history, defrauded thousands of investors out of tens of billions of dollars over 17 years.
00:04:05
Speaker
$10 million bond.
00:04:07
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Donald Trump.
00:04:08
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No victims.
00:04:09
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Banks paid back early with interest.
00:04:11
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And banks wanted to do more business with Trump.
00:04:14
Speaker
$455 million bond.
00:04:15
Speaker
Reduced to what?
00:04:16
Speaker
Just $10.
00:04:19
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175 million.
00:04:20
Speaker
Can someone kindly tell me what the fuck is going on?
00:04:23
Speaker
Which he handled in cash, like a boss.
00:04:27
Speaker
Special thanks to Christian Patriot on Instagram for reminding me of that huge glaring fact.
00:04:33
Speaker
You hear this comment from amateur nation and even some pros.
00:04:37
Speaker
I wish Trump would just shut up.
00:04:39
Speaker
I like what he does, but he just doesn't know when to leave things alone.
00:04:42
Speaker
Did you ever think that the reason America is in the state that it is is because we had presidents who shut up and just left things alone?
00:04:49
Speaker
We tried that.
00:04:51
Speaker
It doesn't seem to be working.
00:04:53
Speaker
Trump has a massive ego.
00:04:54
Speaker
Shouldn't the president of the United States have a massive ego?
00:04:57
Speaker
Do you want someone who doesn't want to be there?
00:04:59
Speaker
Someone weak, ineffectual?
00:05:01
Speaker
Oh, wait, we already have that.
00:05:03
Speaker
Considering the evil he's up against, Klaus Schwab, most of Capitol Hill, China, Ukraine, Russia, and now Mexico and many countries in South America who are sending the dregs of society here.
00:05:15
Speaker
Let's not forget types like Bill Gates, Fauci, Zuckerberg, Bezos.
00:05:18
Speaker
Or do you want someone there who wants to be there and is literally volunteering his time, working for free?
00:05:25
Speaker
No, you want a feeble old man who does what he's told by other countries than Barack Okami and George Soros and Klaus Schwab and Mexico, China, Ukraine, Russia.
00:05:34
Speaker
You want a slow-speaking, satellite-eared, gay black man like Obama.
00:05:38
Speaker
And no, I don't care who's gay.
00:05:39
Speaker
I'm saying you want a gay black man in the White House so you can feel better when you say, I voted for him.
00:05:44
Speaker
If you voted merely on appearance, look at all the past presidents.
00:05:48
Speaker
I don't see any Brad Pitt or Ryan Reynolds in there.
00:05:51
Speaker
You don't have to like Trump's hair or his skin color or how he talks or how he gestures.
00:05:56
Speaker
But if that's all you got, you got nothing because the man is nothing but hard work incarnate.
00:06:02
Speaker
He accomplished more good for America in his four years than Joe Biden did in 49 years.
00:06:07
Speaker
Yeah, go ahead with your memorized talking points about what?
00:06:10
Speaker
Quotes?
00:06:11
Speaker
Twitter posts?
00:06:13
Speaker
Yeah, watch more CNN sheep.
00:06:14
Speaker
There's not one president in my lifetime that could endure the financial, mental, physical, and emotional stresses survived by Donald J. Trump.
00:06:23
Speaker
Regurgitate the Trump hates women and Trump is a rapist and Trump is racist crap around me and I instantly know everything Trump.
00:06:31
Speaker
About you.
00:06:32
Speaker
Your laziness, complacency, lack of intelligence, living your life by your precious feelings, your willingness to sacrifice and sell out your moral decency to keep your material possessions, your hypocritical disdain for American values, your lack of acknowledging what American values are, and how you'd be the first one to sell out your friends to the Nazis.
00:06:51
Speaker
The side you choose, and more importantly, the way you poorly express it, speaks volumes.
00:06:59
Speaker
At Dave Brown Live posted a great one.
00:07:02
Speaker
He said this, liberals, if we could just jail Trump, get rid of MAGA, end the electoral college, stack the Supreme Court, ban voter ID, and censor free speech, we could save democracy.
00:07:15
Speaker
I dare you to retort, amateur nation.
00:07:19
Speaker
And now for step two.

Planet Fitness Gender Policy Incident

00:07:21
Speaker
Topic number two.
00:07:24
Speaker
Looks like Planet Fatness is going to lose a ton of the wrong kind of financial weight if there ever was a time where you get what you pay for.
00:07:31
Speaker
It's Planet Fatness's $10 a month gym membership.
00:07:34
Speaker
Lest I remind you from past episodes, again, why haven't you subscribed yet?
00:07:38
Speaker
I should remind you that this is a gym...
00:07:41
Speaker
That has Bagel Day on the second Tuesday of each month.
00:07:44
Speaker
And don't forget about Pizza Mondays.
00:07:47
Speaker
Steve, you look like crap.
00:07:49
Speaker
Have you been working out at Planet Fitness?
00:07:51
Speaker
Yep, I've lost no weight and I'm 10 bucks lighter.
00:07:53
Speaker
I could have not worked out at all and saved 10 bucks.
00:07:56
Speaker
But at least my time is wasted and I'm surrounded by like-minded, lazy, go-through-the-motions type amateurs.
00:08:03
Speaker
And let's not forget Planet Fatness' lunk alarm, where if someone drops, waits, grunts, or flexes in the mirror, a loud siren wails and red lights flash.
00:08:14
Speaker
Then the manager of Planet Fatness will make a big production out of asking you to leave.
00:08:20
Speaker
But remember, Planet Fatness is all about inclusion and no intimidation.
00:08:24
Speaker
Their words.
00:08:26
Speaker
Well, if there ever was also a time where karma's a bitch and go woke, go broke is Planet Fatness' latest $400 million stock drop.
00:08:34
Speaker
Why did it drop?
00:08:35
Speaker
Did someone say girl talk?
00:08:36
Speaker
The chain saw a $400 million dive in valuation from $5.3 billion to $4.9 billion just days after revoking an Alaska woman's membership for snapping photos of a transgender woman, it was a man, who was biologically male, shaving in the women's locker room, according to a Daily Mail report.
00:08:55
Speaker
I've been in a Planet Fitness and with their reported 2,305 locations nationwide, you're telling me that this shit show is worth almost $5 billion still, but Trump's Miralago is worth $18 million.
00:09:08
Speaker
Wait, was that sarcasm?
00:09:09
Speaker
Kinda, but I'm genuinely asking.
00:09:11
Speaker
I get it that there are thousands of locations of Planet Fitness, but that is one overvalued company, especially considering the overhead and overall cheapness of their gyms.
00:09:21
Speaker
I ain't buying it.
00:09:23
Speaker
An article on the Fox Business site says, Patricia Silva's issue was first reported by the conservative ex-account Libs of TikTok, which has since continuously urged gym-goers to boycott the chain and blasted the company for creating unsafe spaces for women.
00:09:39
Speaker
On Tuesday, the account shared an update regarding the valuation drop.
00:09:43
Speaker
Silva claimed a 12-year-old girl who was in the locker room was also uncomfortable with a biological male's presence.
00:09:49
Speaker
Planet Fatness confirmed Silva's membership was canceled after taking photos or videos in the locker room, a policy violation.
00:09:59
Speaker
Planet Fatness, Chief Corporate Affairs Officer McCall Gosselin, clarified company policy on gender identity.
00:10:06
Speaker
Our gender identity non-discrimination policy states that members and guests may use the gym facilities that best align with their, here it comes, I love this, their sincere self-reported gender identity.
00:10:19
Speaker
I'm so glad you brought that up, Planet Fatness.
00:10:23
Speaker
New rule.
00:10:25
Speaker
You want to be known better.
00:10:28
Speaker
as a member of the opposite sex, you're transgender, I say you should have to change your driver's license and all other information about you immediately when you make that decision.
00:10:41
Speaker
Not later on when you've done it for a couple years or maybe you've had some hormone replacement or maybe you got some breast implants or you got your wiener whacked.
00:10:51
Speaker
Either way, you make that decision immediately.
00:10:54
Speaker
Be sincere, just like Planet Fatness says.
00:10:57
Speaker
Dive in.
00:10:59
Speaker
So instead of equality, Amateur Nation gets special treatment.
00:11:03
Speaker
Undeserved, criminal, creepy special treatment.
00:11:07
Speaker
Go to hell!
00:11:08
Speaker
Good riddance.
00:11:10
Speaker
Boycott planet fatness.
00:11:11
Speaker
If you own stock, get out now.
00:11:13
Speaker
Clearly, this major corporation is run like a complete shit show that endorses and is okay with naked men shaving in a women's locker room in front of 12-year-old girls.
00:11:23
Speaker
Why would you go to a gym that not only doesn't care about your fitness by undermining your efforts with bagels and pizza, but also doesn't respect privacy, human decency, public safety, and lacks any sign of common sense?

Social Media Promotion and Engagement

00:11:37
Speaker
You can find all my social media links and email directly at lusantini.com.
00:11:42
Speaker
Follow, subscribe, comment.
00:11:43
Speaker
Most importantly, leave a review of this podcast and copy and paste the link from wherever you listen and send it to a fellow pro or an amateur who is doing life wrong.
00:11:52
Speaker
I post short clips throughout the week so you get a taste of what's coming.
00:11:55
Speaker
And Thursdays, you get a trailer with all the upcoming week's topics of discussion on Sneak Peek Thursdays.
00:12:01
Speaker
a la carte and three pro things soon but first this week in the pussification of america on topic number three next the honor and remember flag is a nationally recognized symbol that sends a message of appreciation for the sacrifice made by our fallen heroes and their families
00:12:19
Speaker
The flag flies at many NASCAR races around the country, and you can help honor our nation's fallen military members and remember the eternal sacrifice of their service by flying the flag too.
00:12:30
Speaker
Text FLAG to 71777 or visit honorandremember.org to learn more.
00:12:33
Speaker
Together, we remember them all.
00:12:41
Speaker
Hi pros, Lou Santini here, host of Amateur Nation.
00:12:45
Speaker
My Dry Bar Comedy Special, Amateur Nation, is now available.
00:12:49
Speaker
And just like this show, if you're allergic to a lack of common sense in today's world, and you like your comedy delivered with uncompromising talent like it is bite, then check out my half hour comedy special, Amateur Nation.
00:13:01
Speaker
Go to drybarcomedy.com slash Lou S. This is my way of saying thank you to the pros who listen to this show every week.
00:13:09
Speaker
driveourcomedy.com slash Lou S. Amateur Nation is not just a podcast, it's a movement.
00:13:20
Speaker
Wait, no one here gets offended too easily, do they?
00:13:22
Speaker
No, no one here gets offended too easily.
00:13:26
Speaker
Wow, that's refreshing.
00:13:27
Speaker
Yeah, that's different.
00:13:28
Speaker
Why?
00:13:29
Speaker
Because there are real problems in the world.
00:13:32
Speaker
All right, now step three.
00:13:34
Speaker
Topic number three.
00:13:35
Speaker
Hit me!
00:13:38
Speaker
It's time for This Week in the Pussification of America.

Cultural Commentary on Sexual Identity

00:13:42
Speaker
According to a Gallup poll, almost 8% of American adults identify as something other than heterosexual, or as I call it, E-WINS.
00:13:50
Speaker
Everyone who is not straight.
00:13:51
Speaker
Isn't that much easier than LGBTQIA plus ampersand schwa asterisk?
00:13:56
Speaker
It looks like nobody in your family is a rank amateur.
00:14:00
Speaker
And a little over 22% of Gen Z amateurs, amateurs born between 1997 and 2012, say they're EWINS.
00:14:08
Speaker
Almost 29% of Gen Z amateur women identify as EWINS.
00:14:13
Speaker
Let's all fast forward to 2053 and see how much of this trendiness sticks.
00:14:19
Speaker
Truly.
00:14:21
Speaker
By the way, for those of you who are changing your gender and sexuality due to trendiness, if you think you will have more luck with all those other genders, you might consider you are the problem, not the opposite sex.
00:14:34
Speaker
For discussion, why are more Americans saying they're anything but straight?
00:14:40
Speaker
What's causing that?
00:14:41
Speaker
Is it chemical in the brain?
00:14:43
Speaker
Prescription drug side effects?
00:14:44
Speaker
Vaccine side effects?
00:14:46
Speaker
Or is it the pussification of men?
00:14:49
Speaker
The attack on men?
00:14:50
Speaker
The toxic masculinity propaganda?
00:14:52
Speaker
Social media and mainstream media showing more and more non-straight people while injecting the same propaganda into all forms of entertainment.
00:14:59
Speaker
What, because homosexuality is more accepted than ever?
00:15:03
Speaker
You're telling me that these men just gave up on women all of a sudden?
00:15:07
Speaker
A species designed to procreate has abandoned that possibility?
00:15:13
Speaker
And if you think I'm going to get into the whole men can get pregnant too, stupidity, turn off this podcast.
00:15:17
Speaker
All of a sudden, these women don't find men attractive?
00:15:20
Speaker
Have you seen the latest crop of lesbian women and gay men?
00:15:24
Speaker
With the piercings, tats, multicolored hair, soft muscle tissue, and poor fashion sense?
00:15:28
Speaker
I'm not saying there aren't any attractive gay men and women out there.
00:15:31
Speaker
I'm saying what you know.
00:15:33
Speaker
It's a fucking freak show out there.
00:15:35
Speaker
This is not, well, someone's getting old crap.
00:15:38
Speaker
It's a freak show.
00:15:39
Speaker
It's common sense.
00:15:40
Speaker
You have eyes and ears that work, yes?
00:15:43
Speaker
You're telling me these suddenly gay Americans are evolving into new sexualities, genders, and attractions.
00:15:49
Speaker
Sorry, self-evolving?
00:15:52
Speaker
These nimrods can't even hear herdy words without crying into a safe space, but they can self-evolve and morph?
00:15:58
Speaker
What, because they just feel it?
00:16:01
Speaker
Because they cleared their new improved gender?
00:16:03
Speaker
They got creative and made something up that no one else has because they're just so damn special?
00:16:09
Speaker
I'm reminded of a meme that I saw that showed a typical amateur millennial who is clearly a man saying that they're a woman.
00:16:15
Speaker
And then the next half of the meme is an archaeologist looking at their skeleton saying male, approximately 25 years of age.
00:16:23
Speaker
And just because hormone replacements and injections and breast implants and gender reassignment surgery exists, does it mean you changed your biology and that it won't come with consequences down the road?
00:16:36
Speaker
Play pretend all you want, amateur nation.
00:16:39
Speaker
Biology doesn't lie.
00:16:40
Speaker
You know, science.
00:16:42
Speaker
It's science, people!
00:16:44
Speaker
Science!
00:16:44
Speaker
Science!
00:16:49
Speaker
Here's how it started, long before you and I were alive.
00:16:53
Speaker
When it comes to the LGBTQIA plus ampersand schwa community, long before you and I were alive, here it is.
00:17:00
Speaker
We just want our basic human rights acknowledged.
00:17:03
Speaker
Then came, we just want equality.
00:17:06
Speaker
Then, we just want acceptance into society.
00:17:09
Speaker
Then, we just want a parade for like-minded people.
00:17:13
Speaker
Next, watch our bizarre behavior on social media and TV.
00:17:17
Speaker
Then, be okay with our overt sexuality in front of your children.
00:17:21
Speaker
Then, be okay with us teaching and spending time with your children.
00:17:26
Speaker
And finally, we're doing things with and to your children, whether you like it or not.
00:17:31
Speaker
And of course, I've saved the best or worst for last week.
00:17:36
Speaker
Before I start, let me just clarify that sometimes crying can indeed be therapeutic.

Critique of NYC's Sob Parlor

00:17:42
Speaker
And I'm done.
00:17:43
Speaker
That's as much as I'm going to say.
00:17:45
Speaker
Looking for a way to waste your money and get pointless attention?
00:17:48
Speaker
Come on down to Sob Parlor, a New York City's first pop-up cry spa that offers New Yorkers a place to have an attention-starved conniption fit in front of others so people can see and hear your pain.
00:17:59
Speaker
What's the point of crying if no one's around to see or hear it?
00:18:03
Speaker
Amateur New Yorkers in need of an emotional release can book a 30-minute appointment in a private cry room where they're welcome to, quote, come sob on your lunch break and then go right back to work.
00:18:14
Speaker
An article in the New York Post says Anthony Vallotti, founder, launched this amateur club in late 2023 after getting all choked up.
00:18:22
Speaker
While listening to Mariah Carey's Whenever You Call on the Stairmaster, a then-newly-jilted Velotti thought how nice it'd be to end his workout, stop off somewhere for a soothing cry, and then move on with his day.
00:18:36
Speaker
Pussy!
00:18:37
Speaker
Sure, he could have had a mini breakdown in a bathroom stall or run home to whimper into a couch pillow or, I don't know, have a drink like a man.
00:18:43
Speaker
But the millennial wanted a cool alternative environment that offered him both seclusion and a stylishly unique experience.
00:18:50
Speaker
Why not reserve a specific time and place to deliberately cry for its cleansing benefits, Volody reasoned?
00:18:55
Speaker
Boy, what in the hell's the matter with you?
00:18:59
Speaker
See, this is infuriating because here we have the highest inflation since I've been alive.
00:19:05
Speaker
Eggs and gas are barely affordable.
00:19:07
Speaker
Border security is a joke.
00:19:09
Speaker
People all over America are dying from fentanyl.
00:19:12
Speaker
Immigrant crime is skyrocketing.
00:19:14
Speaker
Literally... Everything is terrible!
00:19:16
Speaker
And you're going to go out of your way to pay to cry in front of people.
00:19:22
Speaker
You are the dumbest, biggest attention whore on the planet.
00:19:25
Speaker
I have no sympathy for you.
00:19:26
Speaker
No regard for you.
00:19:28
Speaker
All lives matter my ass.
00:19:29
Speaker
Someone who pays to cry in public is a dumb, bad, useless person.
00:19:33
Speaker
There is no saving them.
00:19:35
Speaker
They can only save themselves, as I say in my book.
00:19:37
Speaker
Anyone who would simply go out of their way to cry in public would be a bad person.
00:19:42
Speaker
Paying even one penny is stupid.
00:19:45
Speaker
Paying $20 for a half hour is beyond stupid.
00:19:49
Speaker
You want to drop $20 to cry?
00:19:51
Speaker
Tell you what.
00:19:52
Speaker
Come over to my house.
00:19:53
Speaker
I'll let you cry at my driveway.
00:19:55
Speaker
You ain't coming in.
00:19:56
Speaker
And I'll do it for $15.
00:19:57
Speaker
And I'll give you an hour.
00:19:59
Speaker
Just knock on my door.
00:20:00
Speaker
Hand me $15.
00:20:01
Speaker
Walk to the end of my driveway.
00:20:02
Speaker
Start crying.
00:20:03
Speaker
People can see you.
00:20:04
Speaker
You get all the attention you need and also the health benefits of it too.
00:20:07
Speaker
And I get $15.
00:20:10
Speaker
How about spending $20 to go laugh somewhere for a half an hour?
00:20:13
Speaker
Oh, wait, you mean comedy clubs and actually laugh and genuinely feel better about yourself?
00:20:18
Speaker
No, spend your $20 going someplace where you can cry to be seen.
00:20:23
Speaker
I know laughing in public is, there's no attention in that.
00:20:26
Speaker
No one's just looking just at you.
00:20:29
Speaker
This is a great stupid detector.
00:20:31
Speaker
Anyone who pays that needs to have their information tracked and denied all credits and loans.
00:20:35
Speaker
You want to start invading privacy?
00:20:37
Speaker
These are the amateurs that you should be checking out.
00:20:39
Speaker
Any outstanding debts should be collected immediately because the payees will be dead soon.
00:20:44
Speaker
And yes, I'm kidding.
00:20:45
Speaker
No one should ever have their privacy tracked.
00:20:47
Speaker
Congratulations, New York City.
00:20:49
Speaker
You've installed amateur stations.

Political Commentary and Social Issues

00:21:00
Speaker
All right, a little bit of anti-amateur tidbits.
00:21:02
Speaker
This is a la carte.
00:21:03
Speaker
Here we go.
00:21:05
Speaker
To all the illegal aliens who are squatting in taxpaying Americans' homes, four words.
00:21:11
Speaker
Now yous can't leave.
00:21:14
Speaker
Amateur Nation, I know you want EVs to be efficient, but they suck.
00:21:20
Speaker
Now that you can face that reality, let's talk genders.
00:21:24
Speaker
I wish a political candidate would use this slogan, vote for me and I'll leave you alone.
00:21:29
Speaker
Pro-Americans just want to be left the hell alone.
00:21:34
Speaker
Leave our money alone, stop tracking us, stop telling us what we can drive, cook on, go, do, say, leave us the hell alone.
00:21:44
Speaker
So, are we going to bill Singapore for destroying the Francis Scott Key Bridge in Baltimore?
00:21:49
Speaker
Or are we going to sit back and suck it like always?
00:21:52
Speaker
If I were president, I'd call Singapore and say, you got 24 hours to assemble engineers and a crew to get your incompetent asses over here and start rebuilding.
00:21:59
Speaker
And we're going to hang on to this ship and all its contents as collateral until you do.
00:22:03
Speaker
And we're billing you for every penny of damage control, inconvenience, and every bit of infrastructure and commerce that is affected.
00:22:10
Speaker
And if they don't, guess what you're not shipping to America?
00:22:12
Speaker
Anything from Singapore.
00:22:14
Speaker
Accident or not, you break it, you bought it.
00:22:18
Speaker
As alert pro Michael Falzone on Facebook said, I'm thinking it was one of those racist bridges that was built too low so underprivileged boats couldn't get to the dock.
00:22:28
Speaker
And again, DEI hire Secretary of Transportation Pete, don't ask me, I just have the title on my desk plate, Buttigieg is silent.
00:22:38
Speaker
Drag queen Shangela, aka Darius Jeremy Pierce, kind of sucks the shine off it, doesn't it?
00:22:45
Speaker
You know, all these drag queens and all the crazy get-ups and their over-the-top goth look.
00:22:51
Speaker
Put it this way, I've yet to see a drag queen that looks like any woman I've ever seen in life since I was born.
00:22:58
Speaker
And then you find out their real name, hey, Darius Jeremy Pierce.
00:23:02
Speaker
Anyway, Shangela has been accused by four people who say he either sexually assaulted them or tried to have sex with them when they were too inebriated to consent.
00:23:12
Speaker
Now, in case you don't know or care who this amateur is, Shangela was invited by VP Kamala, everyone knows how I got this job, Harris, to the White House to celebrate pride.
00:23:23
Speaker
Proud now, Cammie?
00:23:26
Speaker
Speaking of scumbags, music exec and producer, rapper, actor, songwriter, and music sampler, Sean Hashtag Diddler Combs, recently had his homes raided as he is under investigation for human trafficking.
00:23:38
Speaker
Meanwhile, two people on polar opposite sides of the moral spectrum, Suge Knight and Candace Owens, both speculate that the feds already knew what Diddy was up to, but they're going to make him the fall guy so they can protect the people at the top of the human trafficking ring.
00:23:54
Speaker
They are raiding his home to hide evidence, not to find it.
00:23:59
Speaker
That's how this works.
00:24:01
Speaker
How about this find by an alert pro?
00:24:03
Speaker
Melissa McCollum posted in the Comical Conservative Facebook group this find in the German dictionary, Schumer, as in Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer, and that is the actual meaning of the German word Schumer.
00:24:17
Speaker
It means good for nothing and or vagabond.
00:24:22
Speaker
Time now for three pro things.
00:24:24
Speaker
Three things that are done right.
00:24:26
Speaker
Number one.
00:24:30
Speaker
Oh, this just in.
00:24:31
Speaker
New York City is now handing illegal aliens prepaid debit cards as part of a $53 million program.
00:24:37
Speaker
The illegals must promise to only buy food and baby supplies and will get $1,400 a month.
00:24:45
Speaker
You struggling taxpaying legal Americans continue to suck it.
00:24:49
Speaker
As found on the at the scoop underscore U.S. on Instagram, Republican Tennessee Senator Bill Haggerty exposes the real reason why commies want illegal immigrants counted immediately.
00:25:00
Speaker
in the census.
00:25:16
Speaker
The Democrat Congressman Yvette Clark from Brooklyn, New York, explaining to us why she said very clearly the quiet part out loud.
00:25:25
Speaker
She needs these illegal immigrants for the purposes of redistricting in our nation.
00:25:30
Speaker
Today, we count the number of people, not the number of citizens for the purpose of allocating congressional districts and electoral votes.
00:25:37
Speaker
What we're seeing is the Democrats using the system by creating sanctuary cities in blue states.
00:25:44
Speaker
that are literally losing citizens every day to states like mine.
00:25:47
Speaker
What's happening is cities like San Francisco, Los Angeles, Chicago, New York, are acting as magnets to attract illegal immigrants.
00:25:56
Speaker
Those immigrants are then being counted in the populations of California, Illinois, New York, and other cities.
00:26:02
Speaker
for the purposes of allocating congressional districts and electoral votes.
00:26:07
Speaker
As a result, the limousine liberal in California has much more power in their vote than the single mom in Tennessee.
00:26:13
Speaker
That needs to come to an end.
00:26:14
Speaker
We need to clarify this once and for all.
00:26:16
Speaker
We need to make certain that only citizens counted for the purposes of allocating congressional districts.
00:26:23
Speaker
We're putting forward some important legislation.
00:26:25
Speaker
But you already knew that because you're a pro.
00:26:28
Speaker
Number two.
00:26:32
Speaker
Good news, members of organized crime.
00:26:34
Speaker
RICO isn't a crime.
00:26:36
Speaker
It's just a category.
00:26:38
Speaker
Just ask New York Representative AOC.
00:26:40
Speaker
No, really, the dumbest person on Capitol Hill.
00:26:43
Speaker
How dare you?
00:26:43
Speaker
She's a nice lady.
00:26:44
Speaker
Recently is getting all the heat that she deserves for claiming that RICO, the Racketeer Influenced and Corrupt Organizations Act, is not a crime, but a category.

AOC and RICO Laws: A Parody

00:26:55
Speaker
Man, that sure would have changed the Sopranos series, wouldn't it?
00:26:58
Speaker
Warning, you may get stupider after hearing this audio I'm about to play of not a three-year-old, but a grown bartender posing as a politician questioning Tony Bobulinski regarding the Biden crime family's influence peddling among other crimes.
00:27:11
Speaker
And she, like all an amateur nation, does the equivalent of putting your hands over your ears and yelling, la, la, la, I'm not listening to you, like the three-year-old mentality that she has.
00:27:22
Speaker
Here we go.
00:27:22
Speaker
Is it your testimony today?
00:27:25
Speaker
that you personally witnessed President Joe Biden commit a crime.
00:27:35
Speaker
I believe the fact that he was sitting with me while I was putting together a business deal.
00:27:39
Speaker
Did you witness the president commit a crime?
00:27:42
Speaker
Is it your testimony today?
00:27:43
Speaker
Yes.
00:27:44
Speaker
And what crime do you have you witnessed?
00:27:47
Speaker
How much time do I have to go through it?
00:27:49
Speaker
It is simple.
00:27:50
Speaker
You name the crime.
00:27:52
Speaker
Did you watch him steal something?
00:27:54
Speaker
Corruption statutes, RICO and conspiracy.
00:27:57
Speaker
What is it?
00:27:58
Speaker
What is the crime, sir?
00:28:03
Speaker
You asked me to answer the question.
00:28:05
Speaker
I answered the question.
00:28:06
Speaker
Rico, you're obviously not familiar with.
00:28:08
Speaker
Excuse me, sir.
00:28:09
Speaker
Excuse me, sir.
00:28:11
Speaker
Excuse me, sir.
00:28:12
Speaker
Rico is not a crime.
00:28:14
Speaker
It is a category.
00:28:16
Speaker
What is the category of crimes that you're then charged?
00:28:20
Speaker
You have charges.
00:28:21
Speaker
You have charges.
00:28:24
Speaker
Sir, please name.
00:28:24
Speaker
You want me to name the exact statute under Rico?
00:28:27
Speaker
Yes.
00:28:27
Speaker
Well, it's funny.
00:28:28
Speaker
In this committee room, everyone's not here.
00:28:30
Speaker
There's over 18 lawyers that went to law school.
00:28:32
Speaker
All right, sir.
00:28:32
Speaker
I reclaim my time.
00:28:33
Speaker
I reclaim my time.
00:28:34
Speaker
I'll leave it up to you guys.
00:28:35
Speaker
Okay, thank you, sir.
00:28:36
Speaker
I reclaim my time.
00:28:37
Speaker
So to that order, I invite you to listen to this parody song I wrote about two years ago, and you can find it on my YouTube page, at Lou Santini, in my sketches and parody songs playlist, where you can read lyrics and follow along to all my sketches and song parodies.
00:28:50
Speaker
This pro thing is also perfectly timed because considering America's Francis Scott Key Bridge in Maryland was destroyed by amateur Singaporeans, take a listen to this song entitled Oh Say AOC with apologies to Francis Scott Key and all singers.
00:29:15
Speaker
Oh say AOC
00:29:20
Speaker
We all know you're not bright As a leader you failed Should have stuck to bartending Hypocritical heart No sense of wrong or right Or the Twitter we watch
00:29:50
Speaker
While you're whining and scheming With your horse-toothed dead stare And pretending to care Wait, your boyfriends white Call us racist, you dare
00:30:15
Speaker
When you speak in your sea, we can't count all the f***s we gave.
00:30:26
Speaker
You're as dumb as one can be.
00:30:33
Speaker
Amateur, now go brave.
00:30:45
Speaker
Number three.
00:30:50
Speaker
Now to send you off with a smile on your face from people who actually can sing.
00:30:54
Speaker
From there, I ruined it.
00:30:55
Speaker
On Instagram, brought to my attention by alert pro Stephen Nicola in North Olmstead, Ohio, a quick two-song medley of the Sound of Silence tune with replaced lyrics from Sir Mix-A-Lot's Baby Got Back and Fergie's My Humps.
00:31:10
Speaker
This is fun, and it's perfectly well done.
00:31:13
Speaker
Enjoy.
00:31:16
Speaker
I like big butts, I cannot lie You other brothers can't deny When a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist And a round thing in your face You get sprung Cause you notice that butt was stuffed You pull out tough
00:31:44
Speaker
Deep in the jeans she's wearing What you gonna do with all that junk All that junk inside that trunk I'ma get, get, get you drunk
00:32:04
Speaker
If you love drunk of my heart, what you gonna do with all that S inside them jeans?
00:32:15
Speaker
Gonna make you scream.
00:32:17
Speaker
My heart, my heart, my heart.
00:32:32
Speaker
Don't tolerate amateurs and their America last agenda.
00:32:37
Speaker
Find all my social media links on Instagram, Truth Social, Facebook, and YouTube at lewesantini.com.
00:32:44
Speaker
2024 is the year of the great resist.
00:32:46
Speaker
Do not stay silent, fellow pros.
00:32:49
Speaker
Make your voice and your votes heard.
00:32:52
Speaker
Amateur Nation is not just a podcast.
00:32:54
Speaker
It's a movement.

Promotion of 'Amateur Nation' Book

00:32:55
Speaker
Remember, amateurs, we see you.
00:32:57
Speaker
You're not at home.
00:32:59
Speaker
Don't do life wrong.
00:33:01
Speaker
Go pro.
00:33:01
Speaker
Don't be an amateur.
00:33:03
Speaker
For Amateur Nation, I'm Lou Santini, and this has been a big, major production.
00:33:15
Speaker
Tell him, Joe.
00:33:15
Speaker
You should vote for Trump.
00:33:17
Speaker
You should vote for Trump.
00:33:18
Speaker
There's been an odd shift in human behavior over the last 15 plus years.
00:33:23
Speaker
A sense of entitlement.
00:33:24
Speaker
A constant need for attention.
00:33:26
Speaker
Ironically, coupled with the need to be left alone.
00:33:28
Speaker
A desire to be treated the same as everyone else.
00:33:31
Speaker
Stupidly combined with the mindset of, I'm special, so treat me accordingly.
00:33:35
Speaker
Introducing the book, Amateur Nation.
00:33:37
Speaker
The Decline of Common Sense, Manners, and Social Skills.
00:33:40
Speaker
The Second Edition.
00:33:41
Speaker
Inside, you'll read...
00:33:42
Speaker
The Amateur Mission Statement.
00:33:44
Speaker
The 30 Truths About Amateurs.
00:33:45
Speaker
The Four Stages of Being an Amateur.
00:33:48
Speaker
Amateur Habitats and History.
00:33:50
Speaker
Social Media Plus Me, Me, Me Equals Amateur.
00:33:53
Speaker
Technology and Amateur Behavior.
00:33:55
Speaker
With dozens of real funny photos, weird signs, and laugh-out-loud real-life accounts and actual conversations vividly showing how us pros are surrounded by Amateur Nation every day.
00:34:06
Speaker
Download the expanded second edition of the e-book, Amateur Nation, The Decline of Common Sense Manners and Social Skills.
00:34:12
Speaker
The second expanded edition, available now.
00:34:14
Speaker
Be a pro.
00:34:15
Speaker
Go to Amazon.
00:34:16
Speaker
Type Amateur Nation.