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S2. E3: 'The Banana Hammock Defense' | Triangle Agency Campaign
1 Playsin 10 hours
Can we even have a successful podcast if we're being punished for making puns? This is the 3rd episode which means it's the most important one according to the laws of triangles.
These are the 'Triangle Stories' This an improvised comedy roleplaying podcast using the 'Triangle Agency' system by Caleb Zane Huett & Sean Ireland. Music provided by 'Blood Boy', find them on Spotify.
- Nate Valentine as 'Felix Fuzzworth'
- Ivana Mendez as 'Barabelle'
- Tucker Dally Johnston as 'Stewbert Bertmire'
- Paul Emrich as 'The General Manager'
Email us at BeatOurQuest@Gmail.com or find us on most social media @BeatOurQuest.
Join our Discord at: https://discord.gg/3GAJ8NPvvF
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Transcript
Introduction to Beat Our Quest and Triangle Agency
00:00:00
Speaker
This is Beat Our Quest, an improvised comedy role-playing podcast using the Triangle Agency system. And whether you do or do not know what a TPS report is, you're in the right place.
00:00:14
Speaker
And if you hear the disembodied voice of children laughing during the hold music, hang up and call your general manager immediately. You will be put on hold. Last time, our agents got to experience the spending time mechanic, where each one of them spent time improving either their anomaly, competency, or their relationships.
00:00:35
Speaker
During that time, we met Barabel's daughter, had Stubert practice some of his anomalous powers, and joined Felix as he continued his onboarding process at the agency.
Beginning of the Second Hunt at the Garden Estate
00:00:43
Speaker
Afterward, they began their second hunt, searching for something that was disrupting a local party at a nearby garden estate.
00:00:49
Speaker
Our session ended when Felix was assaulted by a sentient glove that attacked him while he was investigating a pool motor. And that's where we find our... Oh, ah one thing, as I listened to the recap, it's worth noting that Barabelle, Ivana, you actually are going to earn a second demerit.
00:01:07
Speaker
ah There was a time there at the end of the episode... There was a first demerit? Wait! Yes, you absolutely... What? I think Tucker called you out on that first one. Oh yeah, I called you out on that one. Ooh, I'm sorry. I am in denial. You told Jillian Pink's that she, unfortunately, you knew this about her, that she was not gritty enough.
00:01:27
Speaker
And I'm going to count that as bringing bad news to somebody. Worst part of my day is when people tell me I'm not gritty enough. But it's not bringing bad news to somebody. if Okay, if you know this about yourself, right, you're a bad reader and you know it. And a teacher comes up to you and he's like, hey, you're a bad reader. That's not bad news. You know about it already. I'm not the first person to tell her that.
00:01:54
Speaker
I don't know how Objection. to Speculation. Oh, okay. Here's how we're going handle
Ivana's Comical Defense in Triangle Court
00:02:00
Speaker
this. Oh, no. We're going to introduce ah Triangle Court, where we're going I'm going to see ah operate as a judge, and we're going to allow Ivana to function as a defendant to see if she truly earns this demerit. If she successfully defends her case, we'll have that demerit expunged from her record. um And I will allow one of the other players to serve as a prosecutor um with the opportunity to reward with a ah compensation.
00:02:25
Speaker
ah Would either of you like to serve? I'll give it a shot. Why not? All right. Yeah. Your defendants defense, you'll start. What is your reasoning why this is a ah not a...
00:02:39
Speaker
Yeah, it's not a demerival offense because as stated by the individual in question here, she makes the claim about herself first. Therefore, she is aware of this information. I am only just...
00:02:58
Speaker
Reinforce. No, not reinforcing. Reinstating. No, that's also another word. What's a word in English that that means what I want to say? Someone help me. Banana hammock. Banana hammock. Excellent. She's banana hammocking.
00:03:12
Speaker
She's I'm just banana hammocking her statement back at her. Therefore, I am not giving her bad news. i am telling her what she wants to hear.
00:03:24
Speaker
You could even say I'm giving her good news because I'm making her feel validated. Prosecution? Well, Ms. Barabelle, ladies and gentlemen of the jury.
00:03:35
Speaker
Nate put suspenders on. If I... And when did he grow that mustache? um Ladies gentlemen of the jury, if... I'm not, we're all beautiful people here. I'm not calling anyone ugly. But if I were an ugly person, I would know it.
00:03:51
Speaker
But if someone came up to me and called me an ugly person, I would still be day devastated, positively devastated to find out that other people agreed with me.
00:04:06
Speaker
And by definition, that is bad news. I rest my case. Or do we do another back and forth? No, i mean we're goingnna we're not going to make a whole episode of this. We haven't even started. je big statement close make a Closing statement. yeah Closing statement. Closing statement. Keep it quick. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
00:04:29
Speaker
That's good. And the banana hammockers. o Exactly. Rest my case. Well, I went to law school with the judge, so good luck. Ha ha ha!
00:04:42
Speaker
i'll take by I'll take my commendation now, please and thank you. i'm going to let Tucker serve as the juror, as an independent juror. Wow. Wow. Okay. um We're going set the tone for the rest the episode, Tucker. Yeah.
00:04:56
Speaker
We, the jury, ah all all nine of us, I don't know how many jurors there are. I've always gotten out of jury duty. He? He? ah 12 angry men, guys. 12. that what that's about?
00:05:10
Speaker
Never seen it. I thought it was about one of them was actually three raccoons in a suit. That's the extended cot. Me and my two other raccoons ah find the defendant not guilty. Wow.
00:05:24
Speaker
All right. Oh, my God. I can keep being a bitch. Ah! She made ah she made have you made a really good point that she brought it up herself and said it and you just he just banana hammocked back to her. though I would like to clarify, a jury typically has six to 12 people.
00:05:41
Speaker
Six to 12? I was right about nine. There were nine of us.
00:05:54
Speaker
Tucker Dally Johnston Stuart Stuart Burtmeier. Nate Valentine as Felix Fuzzworth. Ivana Maria Mendez-Babon as Barabel.
00:06:09
Speaker
Let's get right back
Felix's Encounter with Sentient Glove
00:06:10
Speaker
into it. This glove came slingshotting out of the pool motor. And you see Felix Fuzzworth being strangled by this winter glove.
00:06:20
Speaker
I have a quick question about this. is Is harm a mechanic in the game if I were to try to get out of harm or is being strangled close enough? That's harm. It's harm. There's no like... So the game doesn't have tiers of damage. It assumes one unit of harm is enough to kill a normal human being. So you being strangled to death is you being harmed for one unit of harm. two Two units of harm is something like ah you know, being crushed in a compactor, something that would like cause farm, remove so much more of your physical body that it takes more effort to reconstruct you. And three, the books describes it as like, if you were like pulled into a black hole, you know, like swirled about into a, like a tiny particle. So I hope there's never a three, but this would be, this is one unit of harm being done to you.
00:07:05
Speaker
You will, this is a fatal unit of harm in any instance where the anomalies are attacked. Great. I'm going to go ahead and activate my universal recipient, which says that when I receive harm or are hurt in any way, i may roll persistence.
00:07:20
Speaker
um Okay. So I get to roll my 64. And do I i have persistence? I have three notches in persistence. Do I get to do anything else or I'm still rolling three? It means you don't suffer from burnout, which means you don't get minus one on your roll.
00:07:35
Speaker
And it also means you can spend QAs from that category if you wanted to, like, improve your role. Wait, are you persistent? Nice. Oh, that's kind of my thing. oh i that brings me back to a huge thing I should have brought up.
00:07:51
Speaker
There are some additional ah commendation
Barabelle's Weather Puns and Consequences
00:07:55
Speaker
and demeritable offenses for this mission. What? As you remember, you received one commendation for the first weather pun, two commendations for the second weather pun, and two demerits for any additional pun performed during this assignment. So, Barabelle, you're going to receive two additional demerits right now. Hey!
00:08:14
Speaker
Oh! Back to court. Back to court. I'll take him with pride. Wait, um it was any pun or further weather puns? Any additional pun is what I stated. You're going to destroy the podcast if I can't make puns. yeah Yeah, watch this episode have zero views. Negative five. One additional commendation to be made if you for each of you if you get somebody to unburden themselves to you. And there's five sweet commendations if you can find Donnie Indiana's secret milkshake recipe.
00:08:49
Speaker
But yes, unfortunately, I'm going to give you two demerits for that. I don't take them. Just for the sake of not making you suffer, I'm only going to give each of you can get two demerits for that. So I'm not going to like...
00:09:00
Speaker
Ivana, yourre your pun shackles have been removed. They have been removed. Ooh, me, the punniest. If I find it exhausting because you're abusing it, I will start giving more demerits. I don't know how to make puns. that what I know, that's what made that so depressing to give. You went out of your way to do something not in your comfort zone, and I slapped you down for it.
00:09:24
Speaker
That'll show you to take a risk. but Don't listen to Paul, Ivana. That was a top tier pun. Thank you. So I rolled four threes. And make two non threes for your chaos, Paul.
00:09:38
Speaker
And on a success, I select a nearby living person or anomaly. Oh, I didn't read this. Well, we're going to roll with it. I thought i thought it was going to reflect onto the ah whatever anthropomorphized glove or whatever you would call that. it Those are a minor anomalies. Those would count towards the anomaly. So I'm going to hurt it instead.
00:10:02
Speaker
And for each additional three, of which I rolled three, I may choose an additional target. Okay, so i'm I'm only going to, I'm not trying to like strangle other people at the party. I'm just trying to reflect it back onto the glove. So the glove strangles itself?
00:10:16
Speaker
Question mark. When you receive harm or hurt in any way, honestly, you'd select a nearby living person or anomaly other than what that harmed you. Oh, no, I can't do the one that harmed him. Okay, but because that's so awesome, I'm not going to take it away from you. Strangle Delia!
00:10:33
Speaker
It's going to be Jillian. um in ah In a panic. in in i Well, that that'll kill her. I just want you to know, like, units of harm are, like, lethal. That's that's the reason the gun is so dangerous in this, is because when people are like, oh, I'll just kill that NPC, you are eliminated. What I will say is there is another glove that was coming out of the motor. Okay. And they get into a like a weird Looney Tunes-esque strangling each other by their like wrist portion. And they're like leather tousling on the ground um until eventually they let out a whimper and die.
00:11:06
Speaker
And they like deflate with life. Because that roll is too cool for you not to be able to take advantage of it. All right. Thank you. So, yeah. that's a That was close.
00:11:17
Speaker
I'm going to get out of the pool... Uh, done with that. Uh, yep. Your motor is, your motor is borked. There's nothing more to be done in there. ah what, what was that?
00:11:29
Speaker
What were those gloves? They came flying at you. They tried to kill you. And then another one was there. That's, that's just a, that was just some, some gunk that flew out. Um, it looks real weird sometimes. i don't know what to tell you, ma'am.
00:11:42
Speaker
Classic pool glove gunk there, ma'am. Yep. Oh my goodness. As ah as a 12 year pool owner, i wouldn't even want to tell you how many things I've seen come out of my pool. Yep.
00:11:55
Speaker
Oh, look, there's another one coming out right now.
00:11:59
Speaker
Oh, never mind. No, that's just some mud. Yep. No worries. And mud is different than pool gunk. So I'm clear. Oh, absolutely, man. Kind of potato, potato.
00:12:10
Speaker
Depends on the pool. You don't want the potatoes in there. I tell you that much for No, no potatoes. Okay, well, will one of you get rid of that gunk? Are you just going to leave it there in the middle of the pool? i'm a I'm a motor mechanic, not a pool cleaner, ma'am. You know, I tell you what, I'm on it. I'll go get it. as I cannot say no. um I will go. you cannot say no.
00:12:36
Speaker
Jillian, this is a lovely party. i am not going to lie to you. i am a little hungry. Oh, uh, well, Donnie was supposed to have his whole ice cream thing set up and he didn't. Okay. And that's been such a- yeah?
00:12:52
Speaker
Where's Donnie? Where can I find this Donnie? He's at his ice cream truck. Donifer? Donifer? Oh my gosh, I've never heard him call himself Donifer. That's such a cool name. It's a good name, right? I think he should change it. I think it would really attract some like higher clientele. Not that you're not a high clientele. You are the highest, the highest of the peak of the highest of the highest clientele. But if he wants even higher clientele, then maybe, yeah.
00:13:18
Speaker
Or he could be like a second. Donifer the second. Wow. That's the kind of name that would let you meet the queen there. Yeah. Oh my gosh. Okay. It's a really good idea, Jillian. I'll go talk to him to see if I can get some kind of a cold passing place. He he could said he couldn't get his fryer going. He has this whole food truck set up and it's all falling apart. The party's going wrong. Oh, so sad.
00:13:42
Speaker
So sad, Jillian. Go fix it. I will. Okay. Thank you for being here with me and then sending me away. Okay. and As she walks away, I want to do you just reminded me of that ridiculous commendation thing.
The Secret Milkshake Recipe Dilemma
00:13:58
Speaker
I'm going to take out my trusty rubber duck, which is my iniqual requisition. Can you read what the rubber duck is? I will read the first time you've used it. right. Can't wait.
00:14:08
Speaker
Okay.
00:14:13
Speaker
once permission you may describe an outcome to this pocketsized duck toy the toy will speak back your gm will tell you the three steps you must take to achieve that outcome any outcome you request becomes possible no matter how improbable it seems If you ask the rubber duck about anomalies directly, it will melt into a useless lump instead.
00:14:40
Speaker
Hey, Rubber Duck. Behold, I am the all-powerful, all-knowing Rubber Duck. I know all and see all. Hey, um, I got a doozy for you. I got a real funky request. Lay it on me, girl. Yeah, I don't know why you keep talking to me like that, but... Because you built me to talk like this. I am looking for a famous...
00:15:06
Speaker
Milkshake recipe. And I know there's a good one at this party. So I would love it if you could tell me two or maybe three steps that would lead me towards getting that milkshake recipe.
00:15:19
Speaker
And I want to be clear, I'm doing this in front of everyone. I'm not trying to be like sneaky about the commendations.
00:15:27
Speaker
Teamwork makes the dream work at the agency. And so I'm clear I work for you. That's right, rubber duck. Can we not hear the rubber duck or can we hear the rubber duck?
00:15:39
Speaker
It's Nate's device. Nate, can they hear you? The rubber duck? I'm going to say yeah. It would be way weirder if you thought I was just holding a rubber duck and talking to it. And I'm already having trouble making friends at work. And like squeaking at it. I'm speaking in duck, if that's not obvious.
00:15:57
Speaker
No, i'm speaking I'm speaking regular human English and the duck will respond in kind. There are two simple solutions. Donnie is going to be very productive of his secret family recipe. It's never been written down anywhere.
00:16:13
Speaker
There are two ways you could come to possess it. One is to save Donnie's life, and he would trade it to you as a life debt. Or you could simply marry into his family and receive it as a wedding gift.
00:16:25
Speaker
Convince him I saved his life, or become a part of his family. but Okay. Okay. Uh, is that three steps? Uh, uh, putting it away is the third step. um All right. Felix, your duck cannot count very well.
00:16:43
Speaker
No, it's so good at so many things, but counting does not seem to be a strong suit. I don't think, I don't know. You know, it took me a while. Humans, we as humans get taught a lot of numbers and math and counting.
00:17:00
Speaker
And I don't think ducks get the same education. That's fair. I truly feel disappointed when we are promised three things and we only get two. Well, think of it this way. feel like two is such a boring number.
00:17:14
Speaker
Well, you know, it's fewer, it's less effort for us. So I think it might actually end up in our favor. Although you do seem to like the number three a lot. I guess we all do because we work at the triangle agency. Yeah, that's exactly why. Obviously. Obviously. yeah i'm sorry I have one more question out of out of character, which is, are the commendations like explicitly given to us in game? Or are we sort of like metagaming? I mean, like puns. i The whole game is kind of metagame. I'll be honest with you, Nate. Like, there's ah there's a lot of dialogue where it says, like, you can't use this to help you win. i think it's fair to say that you know commendations is a currency.
00:17:52
Speaker
If you think of them as, like, weird commendation bucks that you get or, like, a little... take like a ah like a little ticker that goes up on your wrist every time you do something right it goes bing and you earn one okay great i guess my question is like is it is it weird in game to be like we got to go get that milkshake recipe guys i know we're trying to stop an anomaly okay great i think the idea is that sometimes those things are not necessarily beneficial towards solving the mission right you know the more time you waste on this the more likely the monster escapes that seems like an important factor All right. Well, if we meet the guy, if we meet him, we'll we'll see if we can join his family or or save his life, I guess. But in the meantime... Oh, yeah.
00:18:34
Speaker
That'd be nice. I need a husband. What? Oh. Curveball. Is that what you were trying to... You thought, like, i I should become his husband? You didn't think, like, you know, just say, I'm your long-lost cousin.
00:18:50
Speaker
George. That's a good idea. Hey, are pets part of the family? Sure to some people. Why do you ask Felix? well I think it depends on the family. Like I have a cousin who has a farm and so he doesn't consider his pet pets part of the family, but is it because they, um, they eat them. Yeah. Yeah.
00:19:12
Speaker
Or they make clothes or furniture. this is This is a little bit too hi and too close to home, but I think we're all on the same page what we'll do if we run into them. Are we?
00:19:24
Speaker
that's So? You know what? I think we are. While we're here, do you mind if you mind if I call a a team huddle? You know, just a kind of chirp at you and we all get a around.
00:19:37
Speaker
You know, I was thinking. I was thinking about this. I think we we got our objective done of of getting the hitin' a boss invited in, you know? Because you said you could you could get a DJ.
00:19:51
Speaker
And so we disguised him as, did we get him in here? And that's, you know, honestly, I think that's all we really need to do, you know? He did he just wanted us to do that. And, you know, they the anomaly, you know, it only attacked when you went into its home and tried to, you know, e maybe you heard it. Who knows? We don't know what's what's going on in that glove's mind.
00:20:13
Speaker
So what if we just, you know, what if it but if it's not that bad? What if we just we just let this one go? We say, you know... We didn't find it, but here- Welcome to the party!
00:20:24
Speaker
Hopefully the ice cream works now. You know what I mean, gang? You know? Stupid, are you asking us to lie? no Uh, no, not lie. Just sort of give up on our current situation currently. Oh my gosh, I love it.
00:20:40
Speaker
You do? Well, guys, I think the boss would be pretty... First of all, he'll be very happy. we did a great job with the DJ, Barabel. I'm really excited to see the Wakanda's face when the three of us did this for him. done. End of sentence. Don't need to continue that any further. Well, hear me out. Hear me out. ah We definitely need to finish the mission, right? I mean, he asked us to come and do this, and we're good employees. We're all hard workers. We want to you know...
00:21:09
Speaker
We want to impress the boss. Sure, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think we got to look a little harder because that thing was trying to choke me. So this is not a totally innocent anomaly. Well, you might have scared it. You don't know. You know, sometimes... My watch is going to make a noise. And I'm going to like, oh my goodness, you guys, it's my cardio time. Do you mind if we move our hips from side to side as we do this huddle?
00:21:34
Speaker
shut Sure. Thank you. All right. Keep going. but could I could do the stretch. You know, that's all I wanted to talk to you about. Just thought, you know, i could I could open up to you guys and just, you know, we'll talk about, you know, some things that have been, you know, maybe maybe bugging me. Like, maybe we don't, ah you know, we don't understand everything about the anomaly. You know what I mean?
00:21:55
Speaker
you okay Okay. You know, we can we can table this. We can put a pin in it, discuss it later at ah at a different date and time, you know? Let's let's keep ah looking for clues. Okay. You're a real peculiar guy, stupid.
00:22:11
Speaker
I like it. It's probably better for the anomalies anyways that we capture them, right? I mean... i would I wouldn't want to have to use the gun on one, but if we catch them in the suitcase. Oh, yeah.
00:22:24
Speaker
But be sad. You know, put put them on the proverbial farm, but have them be, you know. Not pets? Well, they're still kind pets. You know, farmers have favorite pets.
00:22:38
Speaker
farmers have favorite animals and they treat them like parts of the family but we can make clothes with them or furniture you want to make furniture out of the anomalies oh why not could be a cool couch stackable chairs would probably be what the last one would be able to do nice So I'm going to go a look at the gloves.
00:22:58
Speaker
And as I go up to the gloves, I'm going to go, Hey there, little glovies. Hey, it's your friend, Stubert. No need to get all aggressive. Are they moving in any way? They're totally dead. They're just regular old winter gloves. a ha ya sha glove Hey, Hey.
00:23:16
Speaker
Don't worry, I'm just going to come and I'm going to sneak up real slowly and then I'm going to grab it. They are just ordinary winter gloves at this point. You're checking them out. You do see on the um the side of the glove is the stitching, they say, from Middleton High. Hey, did we meet any kiddos earlier? i don't remember children. Like as a concept or? as as a Yeah, they're just not that relevant.
00:23:46
Speaker
They don't contribute much to society until they're 18 anyway. So like, yeah who cares? These gloves are from a place called Middleton High. And I don't know, you know, don't know anything about that. Do you think should look around? Could it be like an airport lounge?
00:24:02
Speaker
You know, that's a good guess. let's keep Let's keep that brainstorm a-stormin'. Excellent. feel like I'm really good at this. Brainstorm storming. Is that a pun? Is that a leather pun? Yeah, that's going to be two demerits. No!
00:24:22
Speaker
but well You got me in the headspace because Ivana said like the high thing and I was like, that's in character and clever and not a pun. And then Tucker got blue right past that gate. So especially with the weather pun. Yeah.
00:24:36
Speaker
Oh, sorry. I think that was a pun. We'll see. You know, you've only you haven't met any kids. You've only met the three characters. All right. I want to approach the sweaty man.
00:24:49
Speaker
Poor guy. Old sweaty man. What a way to be known. I don't remember his name. You just called him Meatball, but he's Tommy Totlin. Hiya, Tommy. TT Boy.
00:25:01
Speaker
Hiya. Adult emo? hi He's standing there in a hoodie, and he's awkwardly playing with the strings on the end of it. What? question for you. Have you ever heard of this ah crazy place called Middleton High? Oh my god, yeah. i yeah why Why? are you asking?
00:25:19
Speaker
just, I was wondering. i just, like, I've heard the name, but I just can't quite picture it. I'm not sure. It's weird, dude. It's crazy. that That's where i went to high school. What?
00:25:30
Speaker
Oh my goodness, so it is a high school. It's so funny. yeah but So listen, ah i am very grateful for you giving me this information so you help me out i want to help you out look what's that over there i'm gonna use up my power okay uh called what's that over there i point somewhere nearby and say what's that over there and i roll attentiveness do i have attentiveness i do not okay so you're suffering from burnout for this role yeah
00:26:01
Speaker
So that's not successful because I got one three. What happens with the failure? that so and What happens with the failure? The GM will describe a different object that is now there and it is either obviously out of place or extremely inconvenient. ah shit.
00:26:18
Speaker
What were you trying to make? Um, a Botox syringe. Oh, Barabelle.
00:26:28
Speaker
Because it helps with sweat glands. Oh, yeah, that's actually really... Because Tommy is in the headspace of thinking about his high school, what you point at across the street is his high school bully.
00:26:42
Speaker
thank Look what's that over there. Jared Honeydew. We got a scene between Paul and Paul. Hey there twerp, what are you doing? And it's still him and 18 years old. So Tommy Totlin is like in his 30s deeply like, and it's like his nightmare come to life as his high school bully manifests across the street. And he's like, what do you doing there twerp? Do i have to give you a swirly or something? goes, oh no, no, stay awake.
00:27:10
Speaker
Why did I say your name was Jared? Jared. Jared Honeydew. It's Jared Honeydew. And he screams and runs into his house and slams the door shut.
00:27:21
Speaker
And Jared Honeydew now is walking around the pool party, like knocking ice creams out of people's hands and like pantsing people. He's just being a total like 80s degenerate bully. and Hey, guys. Hey. um Have you ever successfully used any of your powers? No.
00:27:41
Speaker
no None of them. Great. Just making sure my rules are right. Statistically highly improbable. That was pretty that was pretty mean, Barabel. I think I might have done something...
00:27:54
Speaker
ah it it It might have been an accident. Like an accident that you... yeah What do we call that? You used your anomaly? An accident you used your anomaly?
00:28:06
Speaker
believe it just wasn't my intention to bring his bully out. I wanted to help him with his sweating problem. Well, do me a favor and never do that to me because I knew a big, big fella named Tom and he used to scratch me and bite me and bully me and let's not just, you know, please don't.
00:28:29
Speaker
Your bully was a biter? Gosh, that's the worst. Yeah. My goodness. I can't imagine what a bully feels like. Really? It must be so sad. Should we ignore that or I'm going to ignore that?
00:28:43
Speaker
oh
00:28:47
Speaker
Hey, maybe maybe since Tommy's, you know, locked himself in his house and is not likely to come out ever again. ah let's go Let's go maybe see if Jillian's over by Donnie Idaho and see if she knows about Middleton High. Maybe she went there something. Oh, Tommy went to Middleton High.
00:29:04
Speaker
Right. Yeah. But now I don't know where that thread goes, so... Oh, we could ask the bully. he also, I'm assuming, went to Middleton High.
00:29:15
Speaker
fuck. Yeah, I guess. Woo-hoo, Mr. Honeydew! Hey, Jared, we have some questions about ah ah monster truck rallies and cheerleaders. Whoa, I love both of those things. And he's like he's he puts the kid down and he's been giving a wedgie and he like kicks him in the butt and he like comes over to you guys like, Whoa, you're pretty grand dude, man. i would like your accent. ah ah Thanks, yeah. It's all mine and has always been that.
00:29:46
Speaker
Nice, nice, nice. So what do you want to know, bro? Oh, you know, I i was just wondering, you know, at at your high school, um do they have anything like a monster truck rally or like you have a good football team with cheerleaders? Like what was just generally your your high school experience like? What was going on there? What's going on with with Jared. Oh man, I had a great life. I was, I like got all the money I wanted out of kids. They'd come. I bullied them. I wouldn't call it bullying. that That's what dorks call it nowadays. I call it being friends with, you know?
00:30:21
Speaker
Yeah. You're friends with everyone. Right. Right. She gets it, man. I get it. And you go to your friends, you're like, hey, man, can you give me some of your lunch money? And they're like, no. And then you have to negotiate with them by, like, you know, get a little physical. You're a little businessman. Look at him. He's a little businessman. I'm a little businessman.
00:30:42
Speaker
I don't like the way used to. Yeah. So when I saw Tommy, it took me all back. Tommy, used to pick on all the time. He was a chubby little guy. He always used to wear hoodies and sweatpants everywhere he went. We called him Tommy Turtle.
00:30:59
Speaker
Even in the summertime, he used to wear hoodies and sweatpants. Honestly? I don't even think I ever saw him in, like, shorts. He was always in sweatpants or a hoodie or something like that. Oh my god, he must be, like, really skinny.
00:31:13
Speaker
You'd think that. Did he ever wear ah gloves made of yarn, Mr. Jared? I mean, yeah, like, we all wore winter clothes all the time. That was, like, I think where we all felt, like, real comfortable. You know, or like, he did.
00:31:28
Speaker
Even in the summer. I mean, that'd be psychopathic. Nah, he didn't wear, like, gloves or scarves or stuff like that, but, like... What about, like, these gloves? And I'm gonna hold up one of the limp, dead glove anomaly things. Are you asking me to, like, identify gloves? Like, those are gloves. Man, your friend's weird.
00:31:48
Speaker
Yeah, you know, we were... Listen, hey, just real quick, you know you're a construct that's ah just been made in the last 10 minutes there, right? And you're not really a real thing.
00:32:01
Speaker
Well, that doesn't make any sense, because 10 minutes ago I was, and he just sits there and glazes over, and his eyes like kind of become white, no pupils, and he just sits there for a second.
00:32:12
Speaker
Nah, it doesn't even make any sense, dork. All right, Will. Good luck with your dreams tonight. Later, he just kind of auto-goes back to, like, straight-up NPC walking on a grid. He goes off and points at some kid at the party and executes one of three pre-written bully scripts in his brain.
00:32:29
Speaker
That didn't seem very nice. No, but I think sweaty guy has a lot to do with this, and I'm really scared we just pushed him away. by we, I mean me.
00:32:40
Speaker
Because this is Jillian's party, right? And if he's the neighbor and he's over here, he must know her somehow. So maybe she has information about about Tommy that we could we could see what's going on. And then, you know, maybe the anomaly's in his house.
00:32:55
Speaker
Wow, that's so smart. Thanks, Bear Bell. I think you're pretty smart, too. Ew, don't lie to me. Okay. Jillian! Jelly!
00:33:09
Speaker
ja
00:33:13
Speaker
What? What is it, bestie? Where's the antipasto? Working. I shouldn't be delivering canopies at my own party. sucks.
00:33:27
Speaker
yeah I'm so sorry. Oh, you need help. She needs help. Yeah. I don't know how to do this. Hey, how well do you know Tommy? Oh, the weird guy? i He's only here because he's like, I have to invite everyone to the whole party. He's awkward, uncomfortable. First day he came to me and asked if we had to go swimming or not.
00:33:45
Speaker
was like, you don't have to. It's a pool party. I'm gonna. I look hot. But like, no, you don't have to wear your swimsuit. Do whatever you need. Sure, sure, sure.
00:33:58
Speaker
You ever seen him in a swimsuit? this is Honestly, this is like the first time I've really seen him outside. he just moved into the neighborhood, though. Hmm. you know You know, we should probably go check on his motor over there, because maybe your motors are motor malfunctioning against one another, and that's causing, my goodness. They might be motor connected.
00:34:17
Speaker
There's like a motor plague going on? Some sort of motor plague, you know, and and Mr. Fussworth is exactly the man you need to deal when you got interconnected motor crumbles going on, you know? Yes. Yeah. Well, so far I've fixed zero and been attacked by one, but I can always take another look. Well, now that's just a day in the job.
00:34:38
Speaker
i just remember that you're dressed in a tuxedo. Yeah. just remember that I'm dressed in a tuxedo. As all good motor mechanics. Oh, no, I think I'm an old denim... That's right. I'm striking quite a picture here, at this girl. I'm wearing a full diamond dress. Oh, right. You were wearing something and then I was like, oh, that she's not fancy. And you revealed you were wearing something fancy. And Tucker in all denim.
00:35:02
Speaker
So what did you want to go? Did you want to go talk to him about his motor? To the Tommy house? Yeah, we should probably go over to Tommy's house. You know, I think that might be a good place to start. Unless, unless.
00:35:15
Speaker
Felix, you really want to go over to Donnie Idaho's or, you know, Bear Bell if you were trying to get married in the next five minutes? I'm over him. I'm over him. I'm over him. Like, I feel like it was like so long ago.
00:35:31
Speaker
So you make your way up to Tommy's home. And as you get right up to the doorway and you touch the door, the doorbell, you all feel it This...
00:35:43
Speaker
chilling sensation kind of like a blast of cold air coming outward from his home um i'm doing what's calling expanding his domain that is expanding the domain of the anomaly ah that means normally the anomaly's domain is stuck into one little small location and i'm expanding that to the ah fullness of this house Okay. That does not mean ah that's like its layer is the whole home. There still is part of the home, but that means there's more, it can be affecting the area a little more.
00:36:13
Speaker
Gotcha. Oh my gosh. Who touches the doorknob? Probably one of us, though, for sure. One out of the three of us. One of the three. Go ahead, grab that doorknob. ah I'm grabbing that doorknob. You put your hand to that doorknob and you do you click and you twist. And just as you finish clicking it, you feel this cold sensation on the knob, that feeling of like, you know, bare skin against a frozen metal pole. And you're able to like pull your hand away in time before it actually hurts you and you don't deglove your hand or anything like that. why ah um But the door clicks open and you're hit with a blast of cold winter air.
Investigating the Anomaly at Tommy's House
00:36:54
Speaker
So you guys creak the door open, hit with this blast of cold air, and you're all for a second taken back to that moment of maybe the first truly cold blizzard you experienced in your life. And then you're boom, right in his home. The home isn't, his home isn't covered in snow, but it has that sheen that comes from everything being covered by a very thin layer of ice. It's especially noticeable on the sides of mirrors and windows where the frost is starting to collect in corners. Oh my goodness.
00:37:24
Speaker
Maybe he hasn't heard that cold yoga doesn't work. you know, I don't think doing a lot of yoga. Yeah. But he must be rich because this electricity bill has to be insane.
00:37:40
Speaker
Yep. I'm sure that's what it is. It's definitely that. it's Hey, Tommy, you in here, bud? We came to look at the motor. Ha! but but you You hear him upstairs.
00:37:52
Speaker
ah ah Can you guys can you guys go home? can Can you leave? quick can Can you leave my house, please? Oh, sure. Absolutely. We're going to leave your house so soon, bud.
00:38:04
Speaker
I'm going to start to go upstairs. i need to step out of his house and then step back into his house.
00:38:11
Speaker
oh Oh, amazing. ah Can't deny a request. Not getting any more demerits. I'm not making any puns.
00:38:24
Speaker
Get my hands clean. ah You are going up the stairs ah and it is, yeah as you're getting up in the stairs more and more, you're realizing they're more slick with ice and it is getting harder and harder and harder to get to the top until you're at the very top step and you almost slip entirely all the way down.
00:38:41
Speaker
But I don't because at halfway up the stairs, I switch to going up on all fours for better balance. More in your center of gravity. I like the smart thinking, and Felix. Real outside the box there. i will give that to you. So you slowly, one hand over the other, slide make your way up to the top of the stairs.
00:39:01
Speaker
Felix, I'm telling you, cold yoga doesn't work. No. It's not yoga, Barabel. This is just the better way to climb things. Give it a try. Instead of doing that, I'm going to use my ability unbound.
00:39:18
Speaker
Oh, really? Good co cool player. like do You know, like could I could crawl on all fours, but I could use this ah existential sort of power that I don't fully understand instead. but um ah So if something is in your way or holding you back, relax your body and roll subtlety. Ooh, which I have! No burnout! Ha ha!
00:39:41
Speaker
Don't. Come on. Don't be a bearabelle. Don't be a bearabelle! One three. i did it. So, on a success, you pass directly through it. You become intangible and can move easily through walls. Wait, so you have this one?
00:39:59
Speaker
You have the three... Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a subtlety, which I have. Not a bear bill. Gosh darn it. Now, Tucker, not to backseat DM, are you interested in spending any of those QAs to add... You can turn any of those numbers to threes.
00:40:17
Speaker
The reasoning you could would want to do that is, one, you could upgrade the power. It lets you do more things. But two, rather than me generating five chaos... I could make less. That's true. That's actually a very good point. so on every So with my one three, I'm actually gonna spend two of my QAs of subtlety to get a third three.
00:40:41
Speaker
I'm going to become invisible. I thought, to be honest, I thought you were gonna bring Ivana with you, but... Oh, good luck. You guys!
00:40:55
Speaker
You do that and you are ah invisible. I don't even think it has any limitations on how long that invisibility seems to last. One hour. For a whole hour. You are completely invisible. And I'm going to let that. to really give you the mileage out of this. You're firstly, you don't generate any chaos. You have three threes. Oh, I can do that. But even if it's not a true. The number of threes rolled is still three. Yes. So I get no chaos from that rather than five chaos, which is huge.
00:41:20
Speaker
But ah the other thing to consider is that I'm not going to have that thing where like in games where like you are un-invisible when you do something. You're invisible for the next hour. Regardless, good, bad, whatever. Great. okay But I don't get the tricendence because it's a dirty triple three, right? It's a dirty oh i know tricendence is what we'll call it. Stupor!
00:41:41
Speaker
Stupor! Where'd he go? Stupor! Stupor! Feelings of alone! Stupor! Hey, Bear, but just just keep going up the stairs.
00:41:52
Speaker
God! Wait, why does God sound like Stubert? Because it's Stubert. God is Stubert? You've been God this whole time? No. No, but boy, that would be really funny. You know, I had an uncle once who thought he was God. I'll tell you about it later.
00:42:09
Speaker
i just don't like stairs. What's that over there? ha ha!
00:42:17
Speaker
What is that over there? Five threes! Whoa! Guess we gotta to find a new term for when we fail rules. So, I'm gonna point, and it's gonna be, you know, those machines that you sit, and they're at the stairs, and they just, like, it's like an elevator. Stairmaster? Yeah!
00:42:39
Speaker
it it of Do you have any other things you get out of that when you roll five threes? Is there, like, any additional threes? On every third three, you may give the object an additional variant. You can freely swap it between us as giving cane... What?
00:42:58
Speaker
As giving a cane an alternate self as a sword. You could give it, like, another mechanic. So it could be, like, a... a yeah Yeah. Okay. Okay. So I sit in this chair and as I go up, I'm also getting a pedicure.
00:43:16
Speaker
Oh, not something useful. for the
00:43:22
Speaker
and
00:43:25
Speaker
I'll be right there, you guys. Sorry, this is taking so long. And I pause it in the middle just to keep going with the pedicure. The gloves sort of become sentient and during this whole thing, and they're like massaging your feet and taking care of the whole thing. And then when you get to the top, they like neatly fold themselves up inside of the chair.
00:43:43
Speaker
Ugh. Wow. That's so hard. Whoa. would have been faster just to crawl up, but to each their own. Ugh. as I sit here for 10 minutes while you get a pedicure and ride up. Oh, where's Stubert?
00:44:00
Speaker
I'm over here. Don't worry about it. That's really for tripping me out. you're And now I'm over here. hey Okay, okay, stop. Yeah, i don't like that. makes Makes the hair in the back of my neck stand up.
00:44:11
Speaker
yeah Sorry about that. It's the old classic Stubert prank. You know, my uncle was always saying, oh, Stubert, you and your pranks one day, I'm gonna smite you, you know, because I'm God. That's what he would say. Ha!
00:44:26
Speaker
ah When it was healthy to indulge in his complex. You guys all make your way up the stairs ah and you eventually see in Tommy's bedroom, you do see him frantically pacing around.
Tommy's Foot Insecurities and Anomaly Connection
00:44:40
Speaker
What's going on, guy? What's wrong? how there Guys. ah i mean I mean, guys. I forgot. This is my voice. meanba Guys, I don't even know what shoes I'm supposed to wear to a pool party. Do I wear dress shoes? Do I wear tennis shoes?
00:44:58
Speaker
Google said I'm supposed to wear sandals, but... And then he reveals, and it's like one of those red and stimpy gross-ups on his feet. They're like super disgusting. Warts, hangnails all the way over. nails i don't really feel even like I can wear open-toed shoes.
00:45:14
Speaker
this is I look awful. Call me! um wait Do we have a solution for you? i cannot believe you said what you said because I have this written in my notes for Tommy. That's great. It was shocking when you even said like, oh, this isn't relevant. i was like, had to keep it together.
00:45:37
Speaker
Wow. We've added really fancy feature to your home. No way. What'd you guys do? i Why don't you try to go downstairs?
00:45:47
Speaker
Okay. He walks over. he sees the reclining stair device. Go ahead. Take a seat. Oh, it's padded for my comfort.
00:45:59
Speaker
Try it. And heated. He sits, pushes the little gloves, come out, unsnap, and they're, like, massaging his feet. They're, like, trimming, doing the whole thing as he slowly goes down the stairs. I would say you unburdened Tommy.
00:46:12
Speaker
see that Nice. Yeah, you're in that one for sure. However, you guys look into his room and it is the temperature is starting to drop dramatically. While invisible, I'm going to open his closet door.
00:46:27
Speaker
The minute you you are invisible, so you open and just a so like a blast of scarves come cascading out and begin to wrap around you. Even though you're invisible, it really is becomes apparent you're there because there's strings and start to kincade up like capture you and grab you like a mummy and almost try to like draw and quarter you inside of the room and pull you apart in different directions.
00:46:51
Speaker
Hey there! You missed. And I'm going to use my ability, missed. I use the wrong things on all of you every time. I love this game. They never seem to know where you are. When something might touch or hurt you, you can say, missed, and roll duplicity, which I don't have.
00:47:09
Speaker
Oh, come on. Come on. Daddy wants to do some harm. two so so Only one three, so I failed it. Oh, no.
00:47:20
Speaker
On a failure, oh the target moves instead to hurt another to an angle that deals additional harm or to a very inconvenience.
00:47:32
Speaker
Oh. I'm going to roll a die. Don't do that. On a one and a two, it's going to be, it'll go for Barabel.
00:47:45
Speaker
On a three or a four, it's going to go for Felix. And a five or a six, it's going to go for Tommy. Oh, no, no, no. Tommy's in the stairs.
00:47:55
Speaker
It's his whole space is the creature's domain.
Averting the Scarf Anomaly Attack
00:48:00
Speaker
You scream, you miss. And the scarves burst. Please hold!
00:48:06
Speaker
Yes! Yes! Okay.
00:48:12
Speaker
Okay. Paul trying to finish his sentence and just getting absolutely buried in our abilities. Okay. Do it. Do your thing. We end up in a secret lobby.
00:48:25
Speaker
Waiting. and I guess we can bring Tommy. Tommy. Any nearby allies to a perfectly safe waiting room for up to an hour. When you return, all affected all affected can place themselves anywhere in the room they left, and no time has passed in the world around you.
00:48:42
Speaker
Yeah. Okay. um It seems like they were launching to someone else. ah Stubert, I don't know if I see you, but I feel you.
00:48:54
Speaker
Yeah, i've I've been called a mouth breather before. Yeah, I smell it. You had some hot Titos earlier?
00:49:05
Speaker
Some hot Hitos? Hot Hitos? Great. a hot heto Yeah, sorry about that. Hey, Tommy, why don't you put that paper bag down and just breathe normally, my guy? right you go Okay, I only got one of my foot done. You know, we'll get you right back there.
00:49:20
Speaker
Hey, you know what's happening right now? One of those ah group mass hallucinations. Yes. I think your your house is so cold that we all might be, a you know, maybe dying.
00:49:34
Speaker
Oh, you know, that that's a lot more common up in Michigan. It's not unheard of. Oh, you're from Michigan? No. no Never been.
00:49:45
Speaker
Great. Well, thank you. If worse comes to worse, guys, and I'm going to take out of my pants, tuxedo pocket, the gun, i can try to blast it with this. I've never used it. I don't know what it'll do, but it's better than getting pulled apart. Oh, I don't think we need to do that. You know, they, they just, they don't need, you know, we can figure something out. We're a bunch of, we're a bunch of smart,
00:50:10
Speaker
handsome, beautiful people. Tommy, you're included in that, my guy, okay? Huh. I've never been called beautiful. Well, hey, I think you're beautiful. If worse comes to worse, i'm just saying we have this option.
00:50:21
Speaker
it's if it's it or If it's that thing or me, it's not going to be me. Has he ever gone to therapy? No? No! no Okay, well, I tried it once and it didn't work for me. They said I'm ah whatever. It doesn't matter what they said. um But what if we try it on the scarves?
00:50:45
Speaker
Like talk to the scarf? Yeah, that's have a nice little chat. I'll give you give you a shot. Absolutely. Give it a try. I am going to then say, have you guys made a decision what you guys want to have happen? Because I'm going to return you the room.
00:50:57
Speaker
I'm not going to let you get away with more than once of, like, skipping out on damage. Somebody is going to be harmed by this explosion of scarves. I will let you. Here's what I'll let you do. I'll let you pick. Who?
00:51:09
Speaker
The one who returns people to their places. What? Barabel. Oh. Yeah. Is going to get to choose who's the one who's going to be the the victim of this attack. Okay.
00:51:21
Speaker
parabelll It can't be Tucker. can't be It can't be ah his character. is That was his ability. This is as is a happenstance from it. This is falls on your conscience.
00:51:32
Speaker
bearbelll Yeah. but Are you... you asking me or just have a statement? I... want to do right by the agency. Yeah.
00:51:45
Speaker
And okay it was my idea that got us in here. I know that's Dubert. Yeah. Wanted to, ah you know, thought this anomaly might not be violent. I guess, actually, that does kind of validate my thought that it is.
00:52:00
Speaker
But I will take this one for the team. I will be an agency employee of the utmost caliber. And you don't have to feel bad about it. It's okay.
00:52:12
Speaker
As the associate of our team, I think it falls to me. i hear you. And I... Wait, this is tricky. Because, and this is Bearbill a little out of character.
00:52:31
Speaker
i don't know which are the bad news to you. If I say yes, is that bad news? If I say no, is that bad news? i don't think either of those are bad news.
00:52:44
Speaker
Bad news would be like you're going to die because of this. He knows. You're not you're not delivering news in any way. Excellent. that Your conscience is clean. We are good.
00:52:57
Speaker
You're a trooper. Really love that energy for you. no just make sure Make sure that the boss man hears about this, you know?
00:53:08
Speaker
Yeah, sure, sure, sure, sure. Yeah, we'll do that. um Yeah, it's great. Cool. We're back. So they're they're going for they're going for Felix? Yes!
00:53:22
Speaker
Here's what I'm going to describe what happens. Because I assume you're going spend two QAs to prevent this from killing you and taking you to life insurance? ah Yeah, sure. I know what life insurance is. I'm going to avoid it. You can reject being resurrected in the mission, and then you have a whole resurrection scene with the company. But if you want to spend two QAs of damage, as these scarves wrap around your arms and legs and start court pulling quartering. What is it? What is it? Drawing quartering. Drawing quartering. I said it earlier. Drawing quartering your character. You burst apart in white, fleshy ah bits, and you fall to the ground.
Felix's Resurrection and Game Mechanics
00:54:04
Speaker
ah the even the head of your thing is crutched and collapsed so whatever was maybe inside of there would also be the victim when you spend those two qa which i assume you do i do i did what just like the iron giant those limbs start to kind of climb their way back onto the body and like every little screw that maybe burst out or your head that had been concaved starts boop like the metal starts re-expanding and your body rebuilds itself. You spend two QAs to do that. Gross. And you are recovered from that explosion. What I will say is this, the ripple gun drops to the ground and goes skittering across the floor between Barabelle and
00:54:44
Speaker
and stubert i love that it's between them i don't love that i dropped it well because i think you die you know it it burst apart in a fleshy way yeah yeah sure i'm going to uh i'm going to turn to them actually there's a very important question that i have to ask that i don't know if you want to include it paul is uh Is it obvious that my person is made of what it's made of? I think they would maybe recognize they I don't think any of them have ever seen a person drawn quartered.
00:55:12
Speaker
They definitely probably recognize that you are that wasn't blood that came out of your body. sure um And they also probably don't. But they didn't know anything that was inside of whatever it was. So maybe the best assumption would be is there's something inhuman about you has been revealed to your compatriots. That feels fair. But I don't, I don't, I didn't give away anything else and I just wanted to make sure it was great transparently lethal to your character in the same way.
00:55:37
Speaker
On that note, I'm going to pick my head up off the floor and look at Barabelle and Stuber and say, shoot it! Quick! ah I'm going to grab the gun immediately and do one of those like spinny things on the finger Like okay where the trigger is. I spin it, hold it, boom, shoot it.
00:55:57
Speaker
Now, I want to let you know before we finish. It's a really good shot. There is a thing where you can um have intercompany conflict is I think is what it refers to it as. In theory, if Tucker wanted to stop you, he can do that. Oh, okay.
00:56:15
Speaker
You can stop me if you let. If you don't want to, we can let it go down. I'm going to try to stop her. Okay, I'm just spinning at them. ah I'm sorry, are you holding... Felix, are you holding your own head, la the Headless Horseman, and your head said, shoot it? No, no, no, I'm sorry, I meant, like, pick like with using my neck, I picked my head up off the ground, like...
00:56:43
Speaker
I definitely thought you were holding your own head as you were like securing it. Imagine what I described very differently from how you have all imagined it first. So to explain how conflict resolution work, time ceases to move until the outcome of the conflict is determined.
00:57:01
Speaker
All players state what they would like to do. Players roll six D4s and note the number of threes. Chaos is not generated from this. Those simultaneously, you those rolls continue until at least one of you has received six threes. Oh, wow.
00:57:18
Speaker
Okay, we rolled once. Yep. How many did we get? Dice Love it. I got two. It's a dice off to six. I got two as well.
00:57:28
Speaker
Okay, we roll again. Do it again.
00:57:34
Speaker
i got two. That's four. One. Okie dokie. One more time.
00:57:43
Speaker
I got one, that's five. Two. I'm at five as well. Jesus. Oh my god
00:57:53
Speaker
I got two.
00:57:57
Speaker
And it's whoever has more at the end. I got three. oh Barabel reaches for it. You kick the gun out of the way. Just got my nails done!
00:58:08
Speaker
yeah You see out the door, it slides up against an icy wall and comes skittering back. It's coming right into Barabelle's hands. He's going to grab it.
00:58:18
Speaker
And Tucker, only you know this. Yeah. But you see the void face of abby appear and give you a little wink and the whole, a hole appears like a Looney Tunes, like black cartoon hole and the gun slaps down and appears above you and drops into your hand.
00:58:39
Speaker
ah So this really weird fucked up. I'm still invisible. I'm going to put the gun in my pants and then I'm going to move away from Barabelle I'd be like, you know, I'm so sorry, Felix.
00:58:54
Speaker
I'm going to have to deal with whatever that is happening to you over there in a second. But I don't think, listen, I don't think that we need to jump to conclusions of murder.
00:59:05
Speaker
I think that the clothes... Just want to be worn. ah The winter clothes want to be worn. So maybe we get Tommy to put on a hat or something. I am going to make an executive decision because you guys, ah after that gun sequence, the creature is going to recognize that something is going on.
00:59:22
Speaker
Wait, but we're trying to help it. Are you? Yes. yes but clothes just want to be worn that a bad idea don't know i'm hoping thing tommy when was the last time you wore your coats i wear them all the time i don't it's it i wear my hoodies everywhere oh yeah i wear what are you talking about i wear wear i wear winter clothing all the time what if we fill the pool with that the creature i don't think you guys have made an approach to try to capture it or ah
Mission Failure and Anomaly Escape
00:59:56
Speaker
solve it. So you're going to watch as this creature roars a cold blast of wind and shatters Tommy's window and crawls its way out and starts Spider-Man slinging its way using the scarves and leaving the scene.
01:00:14
Speaker
ah I know we're supposed to be upset about that, but that's pretty badass. Pretty disappointed. Put lot on the for that, guys. pretty disappointed a little conflicted put a lot on the line for that guys Really thought we were going to be able to catch him.
01:00:27
Speaker
I got a pedicure. Saw a person get dismembered and then get put back together. Fine. You guys make your way in the door and then the secretary excitedly runs to you. She says, oh my gosh, you guys are back. did this Did you capture it? Where's the suitcase?
01:00:45
Speaker
Can I see it? stuber Yeah, so, you know, it's, know, things get a little complicated out in the field. And, uh, You know, split decisions are made, and the good news is we got the boss an invite to the party. Hey, come on. Yes, we That is the really, really good news. The bad news is that the anomaly escaped, and that's terrible.
01:01:11
Speaker
Yeah, I understand. Well, regardless, I need you to fill out this paperwork, and she hands you the mission report, which I want you guys to fill out. Okay. so like So first off, let's name the... What would you like to name this anomaly?
01:01:27
Speaker
Frosty the Snowperson. What about Frosty the Scarfman? Frosty the Scarfman! What would you describe its behavior to be? Erratic.
01:01:38
Speaker
Cold.
01:01:41
Speaker
Ice.
01:01:45
Speaker
Or was it just destroying everything that created heat? It didn't like... summertime activity. Nice. And I can't tell if part of that it also has to do with body dysmorphia or not.
01:02:00
Speaker
that That was a great, that's absolutely like a banger of a description of what it was doing, is ruining summer activities. Yeah. A+. plus What was its focus?
01:02:12
Speaker
To wrap itself around it. entities of heat. um The focus, I think, is like the physical object.
01:02:25
Speaker
Scarf. all Winter clothes. There you go. Oh, right. The gloves. Mm-hmm. Winter clothing. or the focus would also be The focus could be referred to as like what manifested it.
01:02:36
Speaker
what is the enter like What thought? So in the last one, it was the desire to put bags in bags is the focus. So what is the what is the the mental effort that is causing this creature that's expunging summertime activities that Tommy it is probably the source of?
01:02:52
Speaker
It's more fun in the wintertime. Close. He likes winter break because he hated going to school. Oh, yeah. Wow. That's a pretty good, that's a really good description, too. If he has more clothing, he can hide from his bullies.
01:03:07
Speaker
That's all. All of these are wonderful. Those are all exceptional answers for it. A lot of it came from, if you want know the exact thing, it is ah his anxiety about wearing summer clothing.
01:03:18
Speaker
And so that's why it all manifests as winter clothing. Because feet. Because he does well, his feet and his body and his discomfort in being a swimsuit. Body dysmorphia. We've never seen him.
01:03:28
Speaker
Yeah, Tucker really caught that one. Okay, and then lastly, his domain is, of course, his closet where he keeps all his winter close his summer clothing. Yeah. yeah If you had pawed through it, you would have found a bunch of, like, sandals and t-shirts and stuff like that that he doesn't wear.
01:03:42
Speaker
Let's get into the status. It escaped. That's going to be three demerits for every agent. Oh, wow. Let's talk about each one of your individual goals and commendations.
01:03:52
Speaker
Oh, shit. I forgot about those. Oh, my God. don't think I got any. Just the... Okay, so well let's go let's go do it one thing at a time. Let's do the first. Let's do the mission bonuses, right? So, yeah mission mission objectives. I know one of you got the first weather pun, and then one of you got two for the second one.
01:04:08
Speaker
I got the first one, Nick. I got the two, yeah. Great. I unburdened someone. And Ivana unburdened somebody. None of you found Donnie Indiana's secret milkshake recipe. That's fine.
01:04:19
Speaker
um Ivana and Tucker both got two demerits for every additional pun they made. yeah How much is the unburdening doing? One. Great. And then each one of you have your own things. Felix first.
01:04:31
Speaker
I don't think you ever did the same thing twice. Did you uncover what somebody really needs? I don't think so. Great. Did you reinvent the wheel? No. And did you change someone's life permanently? No.
01:04:43
Speaker
Barabel? Yeah. Did you deliver bad news? I whoa You only got the one. You only got you expunged the one from your record. But you see one demerit for that.
01:04:54
Speaker
Did you help somebody unburden themselves? Yeah, did. got That was also the other goal. Oh, wow. I didn't realize that was one of the things. That's amazing. Take the blame for something you didn't do.
01:05:05
Speaker
No, I don't do that. Connect someone to an unexpected fate. I would say the pedicure, but that is also I wouldn't. I'm going to go against myself and say that is the unburdening. So it doesn't really count. I would almost going to say the other thing that you did that's very funny is that you killed Nate. And if Nate hadn't volunteered and you'd killed him without him volunteering, that would have been to submitting him to an unexpected fate.
01:05:28
Speaker
That is true. That is true. All right, Stubert. Did you deny any request? No, I did connect someone to an unexpected fate. I initially connected Tommy to his bully.
01:05:41
Speaker
Yeah. Oh, shit. I'll give you that one. For sure. I can't believe you're getting a commendation for that. Woo! That unexpected fate doesn't have to positive. Let me think for a second. then So then to Tucker. i don't Did you deny a request? No.
01:05:55
Speaker
i don't think you did. i think you were really good about that. No, not. Confidently fail. I said, missed! Yeah, yeah you i but I think I gave you that once before. I don't think I can give you that again. that's fair.
01:06:07
Speaker
Embarrass yourself for others' benefit. I did that, yeah, last episode might um when Felix started digging through the dirt. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I did it myself and covered myself in Good catch.
01:06:24
Speaker
ah Bring something to a screeching halt. I can think of one I mean, when you straight up tried to negotiate not killing it. Oh, ah yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Like if du the tone changed.
01:06:38
Speaker
um Great. Then can I have you guys who had the most commendation? And then we need to add the three to merits per agent for the state. Oh, and also let's finish the mission report.
01:06:53
Speaker
Let's talk about some loose ends. why You don't think we have any loose ends from that party? Not at all. Okay. I'll let you know for a fact, Tommy is out there and his bully.
Debriefing and Consequences of Mission Failure
01:07:08
Speaker
Yeah. he's just um but He's just misunderstood. The doesn't like disappear in a blink of one like blink away back into wherever the hell he was manifested from?
01:07:18
Speaker
I want to reframe our understanding of this bully. He's just a great businessman. Yeah. yeah Great. So there are some loose ends, which means we have a new mechanic introduced next session. there Going through what you're awarded.
01:07:32
Speaker
Ivana and Tucker both had five demerits and the same number of commendations, which means they will actually both be put on probation for the next session. So and unfair. You were both given these really embarrassing little socks that say trainee on them. and And they're like, there's just no good way to get that like tag of the sock to not hang over your shoe.
01:07:52
Speaker
You like you tuck it in. It always like hangs out uncomfortably. ah Nate. ah despite Felix having fewer commendations than the other two, because you were the only one who didn't get put on probation, you're awarded MVP again.
01:08:06
Speaker
That's true. and MVP by elimination. the that The best way to be there. Default. Default. yeah yeah With that, the manager looks over the report and says you all, you know, we're going to have to have a very long conversation about your commitment to this agency.
01:08:23
Speaker
and how badly you might not want to keep keep this dude. With that, the manager looks to you all and says, you know, we're going to have to have a long conversation about your commitment to this agency, and how badly you really want to keep this job.
01:08:44
Speaker
What's that? Strife already? And it's only episode three. hey everyone, you made it to the end of season two, episode three. Featuring Nate Valentine as Felix Fuzworth, Ivana Maria Mendez-Pobon as Barabel, Tucker Dally Johnston as Stubert, and Paul Emrich as our wonderful GM, and everything else. We just call him the Game Daddy. Don't tell him I said that. We're playing The Triangle Agency System by Caleb Zane Hewitt and Sean Ireland.
01:09:17
Speaker
Music this season has been provided by Blood Boy. They're fantastic. Go check them out on Spotify. Did you know we also have social media? Instagram, Discord. We're on YouTube now.
01:09:29
Speaker
I just found that out. No one tells me anything. I just work here. And if you could please spare 30 seconds to leave a like or a review wherever you found this podcast, that would really help us defeat our evil AI overlords.
01:09:42
Speaker
ah Please. Oh, hey, we're also going to be going to Gen Con again this year. Let us know if you're going to be there. The next episode comes out in two weeks, unless you're listening to this from the future, in which case, oh my God, press play right now.
01:09:57
Speaker
Love you. Bye.