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Episode 1 - Better Marriages
16 Plays1 month ago
Is your marriage everything you want it to be? Or has it somehow lost the connection you used to have? Do you feel stuck in arguments that never get resolved? Do you sometimes feel like you're just roommates instead of lovers?
This podcast is here to help.
With one actionable tip per episode, we're going to help you build the marriage you've always wanted - one step at a time.
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Transcript
Challenges in Marriage & the Path to Improvement
00:00:35
Raffi Bilek
You want your marriage to be awesome, but it's not. It's good. It's okay. You know, there's ups and downs, but it's not awesome. We want to help you make it awesome.
00:00:45
Ibinye
Well, maybe you're arguing all the time with your spouse and you have no idea why. You're just arguing about anything and everything. And this is no longer fun to you. You want to stop the arguments, but you don't know exactly what to do.
00:00:57
Ibinye
We're here for you.
00:00:59
Raffi Bilek
Yeah, what about if you just kind of feel like roommates now? You're kind of like buddies and things are okay. There's no fighting, but it's all kind of so superficial. It's surface level. You talk about who's picking up the kids. You talk about who's got to walk the dog. and And you thought marriage was going to be more than that. Yeah, it is going to be more than that. We're going to help you get there.
00:01:18
Ibinye
or you feel like you're lacking intimacy in your relationship. Everything's just kind of ho-hum and perfunctory. And you're like, you know what? There has to be something deeper for me in my relationship.
00:01:29
Ibinye
We have great tips for you too.
00:01:32
Raffi Bilek
Right, we wanna make sure that you guys are gonna get to the top of the mountain. We work with couples every day.
Actionable Tips for a Better Marriage
00:01:38
Raffi Bilek
We are married ourselves. We practice what we preach. And there's a lot to be gained here. So sometimes people feel like their marriage is okay. When it's good, it's good. Maybe when it's bad, it's not so good.
00:01:49
Raffi Bilek
but But we're missing something. We want to give you those things. Marriage really can be awesome. And it's not going to take you years of learning. You don't need a degree. You don't need to be professional.
00:01:59
Raffi Bilek
What you need is you need to know what to do. And we have some ideas for you. So if you are looking to make things better, come on back here every week because we're going to give you simple, actionable tips. One or two things every episode that you can take with you.
00:02:15
Ibinye
Now we know that it can be very overwhelming. Maybe you've been married for a long time or you've been married a short while and you just feel like, I don't know how to get to the other side. Honestly, just come on here. Our episodes are short, maybe under 20 minutes. We'll give you very simple tips that you can incorporate that same day. And over time, you'll actually start to see results in your marriage. doesn't have to be that complicated.
The Hard Work Behind Successful Marriages
00:02:39
Raffi Bilek
Yeah, I want to tell you, I didn't start off with a perfect marriage. I'm married 20 years now, and we had to put in a lot of work, and we grew. And it's not like some people have it and some people don't. Everyone can have it.
00:02:51
Raffi Bilek
Everyone can learn it. It doesn't matter if you think your spouse is or isn't capable, they have this or that problem, you have this or that struggle. Everyone can take some of these research-backed tools and make things better for themselves and their marriage.
00:03:04
Raffi Bilek
You can have that intimacy It can be physically close and affectionate. It can be emotionally safe and wonderful. All these things are possible if you know what to do.
00:03:14
Ibinye
Yeah. And I love that you said that Rafi, because I think sometimes people point at others who have a great marriage and they think, well, they're just special. No, a great marriage is typically a sign that there's a lot of work that has gone in. And are you going to make mistakes along the way? Yes, you are. But that's what we're here for. We're here to guide you along the way.
00:03:33
Ibinye
Right. So it's just about you being willing to just put in the work, start to incorporate the tips. And I promise you over time, if you and your spouse are actually willing to put in the work, put your egos to the side, be humble and learn new things, you will see growth over time.
Unveiling the Truth Behind Seemingly Perfect Marriages
00:03:54
Raffi Bilek
I want to tell you something else about those other couples that have great marriages. That's an act. Just so you know, a lot of folks out there look great, but they come to my office the next day and and they tell me, I've heard this countless times, everybody thinks we're the perfect couple. It's really easy to put projected on the outside, but making work on the inside is a lot harder.
00:04:13
Raffi Bilek
um And what you need is to know how to do it and then put that work in. So we can't put the work in for you, but we can point you down the right path.
00:04:21
Ibinye
Yes. And, you know, sometimes it can be very intimidating to open up to someone. Sometimes you might be embarrassed, like, oh, my goodness, I've been married 35 years and yet there are cracks in my marriage.
00:04:33
Ibinye
It's OK. There's no shame. People are going through it all the time. Sometimes you just, you know, put things on the back burner and keep going for the sake of the kids or for the sake of the life that you've built together.
00:04:44
Ibinye
It's important to know that it is never too late to work on marriage.
00:04:47
Raffi Bilek
It can definitely get better.
00:04:49
Ibinye
Never too late, whether you've been married three days or you've been married 40 years, you can always put in the work and things can get better if you and your spouse are willing to really begin to incorporate these tools into your marriage.
00:04:49
Raffi Bilek
It can definitely get better.
Introduction to the Better Marriage Podcast
00:05:03
Raffi Bilek
All right, folks, if that's what you're looking for, if you are looking to get to the top of the mountain, come on back to the better but but marriage the Better Marriage podcast every week, and we're going to show you the way.
00:05:12
Ibinye
All right, to a better marriage.
00:05:14
Raffi Bilek
See you there.