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Ep: 29 How Life Changes When We Stop Making Excuses
46 Plays1 month ago
In this episode, we explore responsibility and accountability not from shame or harsh self-judgment, but from ownership and personal power. While circumstances are real, they aren’t the driver of our lives, WE are. Our results come from our choices, and when we stop making excuses, we reclaim our ability to change.
This conversation applies to every area of life: health, habits, finances, relationships, and time. Responsibility and accountability is freedom, because when it’s on you, it’s also changeable by you.
Journal prompts:
- Where am I not taking responsibility in my life right now?
- What excuses do I use most often?
- What am I blaming that actually belongs to me?
- What would change if I stopped negotiating with myself?
Where to find us:
IG @whatsmyageagain.podcast / FB - What’s My Age Again Podcast
Email us at: wmaapod@gmail.com
Where to find Tanya:
IG @tlcholistic / FB @tlcholistic
Book with Tanya: https://tlcholistic.janeapp.com/locations/tlc-holistic
Join the TLC Community: https://www.patreon.com/tlcholistic
Where to find Kim:
IG @kimdesmarais.nutrition /FB @KimDesmarais
Book with Kim: Complimentary Connect Call
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction & Mission
00:00:00
Speaker
Welcome to What's My Age Again, the realest podcast for women who are done chasing trends and ready to feel empowered. Hi, I'm Kim. And I'm Tanya, holistic nutritionists and childhood best friends who've been there, done that, and bought the collagen.
00:00:16
Speaker
more than once. Each week we provide actionable steps that you can start today to help you thrive through every decade to come. We're cutting through the wellness noise to bring you honest conversations about aging, hormones, health, beauty, mindset, and everything in between.
00:00:33
Speaker
You see, we're also on a mission to age gracefully one WTF moment at a time. Backed by research and real life, we're here to share what actually works, what's a waste of time, and how to truly thrive through the messy, magical midlife transition.
00:00:49
Speaker
We're so happy you're here.
Personal Anecdotes & Episode Theme
00:00:51
Speaker
Let's dive in. Hello, everybody. Welcome back to What's My Age Again, our second episode of 2026. Tanya, how are you?
00:01:02
Speaker
Kim, I am good. I'm so sorry. I was slightly distracted just now in your welcoming because... We have a new bird. This is my life now. This is my 2026 starting with a little bit of ease. um A new bird. I just quickly snapped a photo. So I've become quite the little bird watcher in the past couple months and I'm not sad about it. Well, for all of you on here, Tanya and I actually forgot to press record as we started talking because a yellow belly sapsucker appeared out her window. And i was like, hold on, we're actually not recording. Yeah.
00:01:36
Speaker
We're talking about birds. And then Kim reminded me, it's okay. It's okay at any age, but it's okay in our 40s that it becomes pandemonium when we see a new bird. So that's where we're at. Welcome to our 40s and welcome back to the
Taking Responsibility vs. Making Excuses
00:01:52
Speaker
podcast. Well, and I'm sure we have some bird watchers watching. I know I have a couple of friends who are into it.
00:01:57
Speaker
Okay. i love it. Maybe, or like you know what I'm going to do? I'm literally going to share this bird, this unidentified bird after the yellow belly sapsucker. And maybe you guys can help me identify it I'm super stoked. So anyways. Welcome back to the podcast, the second one, like you said, Kim, of 2026. And today, it's going to be a kind of holding up the mirror conversation, honest talk that I think a lot of us maybe need to hear.
00:02:31
Speaker
Absolutely. Especially after last week's episode when we know so many of you, including ourselves, have new goals, new ideas of what 2026 is going to be like. We have big things planned, whatever it may be. We thought this might be the perfect episode. And as Tanya said, holding up the mirror. And what do we mean?
00:02:51
Speaker
Well, when Tanya and I were talking about this, we talked a lot about ownership and responsibility for our own health. We work with clients all the time.
00:03:03
Speaker
And so we hear every excuse in the book about why things aren't working or or why they're not able to achieve their goals. And so this episode is all about us taking responsibility.
00:03:19
Speaker
Couldn't have said it better myself. So this is not about shame. It's not about being harsh. It's not even about self-blame. This is about taking ownership and responsibility. And in that, guess what?
00:03:42
Speaker
You reclaim your power. You realize that it's your own self that is often holding us back. We hear that phrase, get out of your own damn way.
00:03:59
Speaker
And that applies to making excuses. When we make excuses, we literally stand in our own way of achieving whatever that goal is that we set for ourselves.
00:04:13
Speaker
Absolutely, Tanya, because let's face it, in any example, you know, when we're making those excuses, we are the common denominator. We are, and and I love what you just said too, that this episode really is about taking that control back. Because when we realize this, when we use excuses, we give away our power.
00:04:33
Speaker
We give away the power to make our own decisions. And so when we remove that and when we take ownership, we we get that control back. And as I said, we are the common denominator here.
00:04:45
Speaker
A thousand percent. And right now in my head, I'm singing, I don't know if anybody knows the interrupters. There's a song called Take Back Your Power. If you don't know it, you need to. I'm literally doing a little dance to it now. It's so good. um That's just a side note, but it's so true. The other thing I always think about when I talk about um making excuses with my clients, when I reflect on the excuses that I make in my own life, life is not something that happens to us. Again, I don't mean to sound harsh, but I'm just dishing out that truth.
00:05:22
Speaker
Life is our very own circumstances that we make through our choices. And we're going to dive into that a little bit deeper because I get it, guys.
00:05:35
Speaker
Circumstances can suck. We can be in really circumstances. situations, but we still have the power to make decisions in any circumstances that we're in.
00:05:52
Speaker
Absolutely. And you know what, Tanya, like as much as this is a health podcast and we talk about women's health, this actually applies to all areas of our life. Because if you're making excuses already when it comes to health, take a look at finances, take a look at relationships, take a look at how you use your time, take a look at family dynamics, work situations. Are you also using those excuses in those respects as well? Right. Right. So it is always on us no matter our circumstances. And when someone holds a mirror up to you, it can definitely feel like confrontation.
00:06:30
Speaker
You're like, that's not me. Or like, how do you know what I mean? Who's me? Like that self-examination is hard. And if you feel confronted right now, that's probably a good thing. Yeah. Because you're probably making excuses at some point.
00:06:44
Speaker
spot in your life and you're thinking like, feel seen. Like, are they looking at me right now? You know, like... Well, and it's... Again, this is something we all go through in different ways, right? And once we once we get this out of the way, like Tanya said at the beginning of the episode, we take our power back. So if you are feeling icky, if you are feeling a little defensive right now being like, that's not me,
00:07:12
Speaker
Maybe it is time to take a look in the mirror. Maybe it is you. ah So like, like claim not you if you are maybe feeling a little triggered, we're talking to you. Yeah. And we're in it with you. Like we we do the same thing. That's where this episode came from, right? Us, our clients, the people we love, like this is where, you know, why we're talking about this today.
00:07:36
Speaker
This is why exactly the big why when we talk about responsibility, when we talk about how our life changes when we stop making excuses, we look back to circumstances. We all have goals, whether they're in any of the areas that you just discussed, Kim, from health all the way to habits and finances. circumstances, those are real.
00:07:58
Speaker
And circumstances, sometimes we can't change our circumstance, okay? So they're real circumstances, but they are not the driver of our lives. We are. So here's a perfect example to go back to. Two people can have the same circumstances, let's say a partner, a husband and a wife, okay?
00:08:19
Speaker
They're in the exact same sort circumstances financially, where they're living, et cetera, but they can have wildly different outcomes in still living the life that they want or achieving their goals.
00:08:31
Speaker
So this is something that I always think about when I think about circumstances, responsibilities, and taking back our power. The difference in outcomes for people reaching their goals, their potential, what they want to do is ownership. Responsibility in the decisions that they're making or not making, the excuses that they're making or not making in a specific circumstance.
00:08:58
Speaker
A hundred percent. And there's so many, like you, that was a great example, Tanya. And like some of the things that we normalize, like excuses that we normalize on a day-to-day basis that actually are keeping us stuck Work is busy.
00:09:14
Speaker
Work is busy right now. I'll do this later. You know, we've talked about this in episodes past. Or kids are up early. I have toddlers in the house, right? I can't, I don't have my time isn't mine anymore. Or, you know, the season is too busy. it's We just finished the holidays. So many of us, the busy holiday season, you know, I don't have any energy. I'm too tired. My to-do list is too long. I don't have the time to do it right now.
00:09:42
Speaker
These are things that we all normalize on a day-to-day basis, but they keep us stuck. They keep us stuck because they influence us so strongly. All of the things that you just mentioned, and Kim, being too tired, the kids work being busy. Of course, that influences our day-to-day life. It shapes our day-to-day life, but it doesn't define our day-to-day life. And that's the problem. So many of us allow our circumstances and the excuses we make within them to define us and define the ability to reach our goals.
Challenging Common Excuses
00:10:16
Speaker
And they don't. Well, and exactly. And let's think about this for a little second here too. If you are in the habit of making excuses that are defining what your priorities are, that are defining that are that are holding you back from achieving these goals,
00:10:33
Speaker
What is there to say that that's ever going to change? For example, I'm saying, you know, I did this myself. I had toddlers in the house and time isn't yours as I just said it. That's the truth, right? Everyone's waking up at 5 a.m. That's a circumstance. That's a circumstance. That's circumstance, yes. It's a real circumstance. But if I'm using that as an excuse to say not start my fitness routine, well, those toddlers are growing up and maybe now we have a 5 a.m. m hockey practice. So as much as we're saying like, you know, that your circumstances, if you are constantly using those circumstances as an excuse, the circumstances will change, life will change, but there'll always be a reason to have an excuse, right?
00:11:16
Speaker
That part won't change. That is such a valid example. You basically just gave the perfect example of the mentality. There's always going to be something. There's always going to be something. The is always at the end of the tunnel.
00:11:33
Speaker
Right? And there's always going to be something that gets in our way that we can use as what? An excuse. There's always going to be something there. So I think it's so important to reframe this mentality of circumstances and the excuses we make. And this is where it's so where structure comes in, which we talked about on our New Year's episode. New Year's, same us. Yeah.
00:12:01
Speaker
not our motivation or our mentality or our drive to achieve something that we don't get to, that that's not strong or that's not where we fail. It's the structure.
00:12:12
Speaker
If something matters to you, then you must find a way to fit it inside your real life. And guess what? My friends, ain't nobody that can do that except you. You have to be the one to work, to break that excuse, and to fit it in.
00:12:35
Speaker
Absolutely. Absolutely. You will be the one holding you back, right? At the end of the day. And if and so breaking that sort of mindset of excuses is is a challenge in itself, right? It's breaking free of that. It's not allowing those to get in the way. And I love what you just said, Tanya. It's taking a look at the realities of your life. So these are the excuses, like what you just said, Tanya, the reframe.
00:13:05
Speaker
There's an explanation there of why you're too busy. There is an explanation there of, you know, what your circumstances is. But it's not a reason to stop. It's a way to figure out how you can do the thing with the circumstances that you have.
00:13:22
Speaker
Right. And now it comes back to the mirror again, yes where this has been reframed for you. And if you're still saying, well, it's not possible for me because B, C, or D, I'm sorry.
00:13:34
Speaker
You're the one making the excuse. It's not possible for me to get my meal prep done. It's not possible for me to find time to, you know, make a whole chicken and maybe chop my veggies for the week. I can't do it. My kids are, you know, I'm always with my kids.
00:13:51
Speaker
There's the issue. It's back on you as the common denominator with love, without harshness, as it sounds harsh as I'm like, it's you, it's you, it's you. It is. oftentimes the most powerful transformations happen when someone holds that mirror up to you and you see yourself, you know, like, it is me.
00:14:11
Speaker
Oh my gosh. I'm in my own way. it It's 100% true because like we said from the very beginning, the excuse gives away your power. So with that mirror up going like, yes, it is me. Always bringing every time you hear yourself making an excuse, bringing it back to you, holding that mirror up is giving you back your power to make a different decision or making a shift or or being able to creatively think about a way for you to make that goal, which is really, really important to you, work. Otherwise, as Tanya and I said, I think it was in the last episode, is it the wrong goal?
00:14:53
Speaker
Is this something you really want? Because that is something you need to reflect on. Does this really matter to you? Or are you doing it for another reason?
00:15:04
Speaker
Right? And if it does really matter to you, hold that mirror up and be like, no This is me. I get to make this decision. Yes, no matter what my conditions are. Because if you are waiting for ideal conditions, never have it's an excuse exactly in disguise that can last your entire life. The memes where people like her the two skeletons are sitting at a lovely table outside. It's like me waiting for fill in the blank. Me waiting for me to stop making excuses is what you are going to be those skeletons.
00:15:36
Speaker
There's always going to be an excuse. And I think it's so important right now to just kind of say like excuses. What do excuses say? What message do they convey? Excuses say things like, I can't because I'm too tired. or I'll start when the kids are back in school.
00:15:59
Speaker
Or it's not possible for me to do that right now because of my work schedule. But responsibility says entirely different things.
00:16:10
Speaker
Responsibility says, what can I do with what I have? The circumstances are there, but what can I do within those circumstances? What can I do with the resources I have?
00:16:22
Speaker
How do I make this work in this busy season of my life? Or, Kim, you always allude to this when you talk about um where we're losing time and where our energy is going and taking inventory. I love how you say that all the time on our lives.
00:16:37
Speaker
Responsibility says, where am I opting out instead of adjusting my time? Love that. Love that. Where do I need to shift? What do I need to do? And it doesn't have to be the other priorities of your life that you take the time away from. It's just take a look at where there's time that, you know, We always say scrolling time or time that you might not be using as effectively, right?
00:17:02
Speaker
How can you adjust? And only you have that answer, right? Exactly. For sure. and And also one other big thing I think too, Tanya, is, and it goes back to like why we even started this podcast in the first place. It's why am I not prioritizing myself? Right.
00:17:23
Speaker
If this is so important, why am I finding every excuse in the book to help everybody else in my life or to do my work or to help my kids or that that that that whatever that
Overcoming Perfectionism
00:17:35
Speaker
is? Why am I prioritizing all of that and not prioritizing this one thing that I believe is really important for me?
00:17:45
Speaker
Kim, absolutely. And maybe we need that little reminder of our very first episode when we talked about the time is now. Because guess what, girls? We just blinked our eyes again and that's a new year. It's 2026. And you're going to blink again and it's going to be 2027. And if you're that, I'll do it when I'll do it when. We talked about this in our very first episode that the years go by and, you know, we we don't bounce back like we used to in our teens, in our 20s. And if we really want to be vibrant and vital and happy and joyous and live the lives that we want in our 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s and beyond, we're
00:18:24
Speaker
and beyond The time's now. So we have to get out of our own ways. The responsibility, it's on us. I love it, Tanya. And you know what's so funny? I just was thinking, i was I was thinking off into space right now because I was thinking, literally, that first episode was six months ago. So if you're an OG... and was literally listening to our first episode in real time with us, first of all, thank you and we love you and we have just so appreciated you growing and asking questions and doing all the things with us. But if you were listening to that first episode, this is six months later.
00:19:00
Speaker
What has changed in those six months for you? You know, have you started working on those goals? Have you been making those excuses? This is a really great time to reflect on that.
00:19:13
Speaker
Kim, six months, you're absolutely right. So I'm going to candidly ask you a question. In the six months that we've been doing this podcast, have you been working on your goals? Have you felt progress since the first episode that we chatted?
00:19:26
Speaker
Yeah, no, exactly. And the thing is, are for me personally, yeah. Yeah, I'm asking, but yeah, have you? You know what I mean? How has it been for you? Good. But you know, it's so interesting. i was thinking, I haven't Fully, i realize we're into 2026 now, but I've been really reflecting, especially because the year of the horse is coming up in February, um February 17th, I think. um And I've been really reflecting on the words and the and the resolutions that I have for this year.
00:19:58
Speaker
And one thing that I think I've been stuck on is the action piece, the action without perfection. And so sometimes what holds me back isn't necessarily the excuse, but it's the excuse that I'm not going to do it the way that I should do it. You know what I mean? Like, it's like, it's not...
00:20:16
Speaker
It's not perfect yet. And so that is what I'm leaving in the year of the snake, the perfectionism. And as I'm moving forward, I'm focusing on the action, the little actions that are going to point me in the right direction. So yes, to answer your question in a long-winded way, yes, I've been achieving my health goals and I've been working really hard on them. But there are ways that I can pivot and things that I've stalled on because of the perfection side.
00:20:43
Speaker
And you just used a really powerful word that I've learned to reflect on in the last couple years. That maybe you say, I'm not doing things the way i should be or they should be done. And that's a word that is such a slippery slope in all of our vocabularies.
00:21:01
Speaker
To be a good mom, we should be doing this. to be this, we should, a good daughter should do this. And that's a hard one in our vocabulary. And that's one that I also just welcome everybody to kind of reflect on is that that should word also gets in our way a lot. And if there's one thing you do in 2026, every time you use that word should, I encourage you to try to dust it, like flick it, like a little flick out of your mind and say, this is how I do it. And I'm doing it as I should be doing it for myself. Redefine that
Balancing Responsibility & Joy
00:21:33
Speaker
should. No more shoulding.
00:21:35
Speaker
No more shouldn't. I love it. No, Tanya, thank you. Yes. And that is, and I think that, you know, what we just, what I just mentioned here, it goes into the episode that we're talking about today too, because sometimes perfectionism gets in the way of moving forward with art. Well, it definitely does. And it can go into the excuse piece that we're making today. It's not the right time can be another one because all the pieces aren't adding up. But Tanya, as you mentioned, it's never going to be the right time.
00:22:08
Speaker
So I ask you, I go back to you, Tanya. What about you? How have you been feeling this past six months? I think that I can say that I've really spent the last six months focusing on myself, on my health. It's no secret that I've had a lot of health changes in terms of perimenopause, the return of my period. Hey guys, why not talk about this on a public forum? She gone again, I'm on like day 50. So there's so many ups and downs in this magical messy part of life as we say every week in our intro. But I really have been focusing on things that I always intended to focus on that I just, again, made excuses for. And it's really easy for me to make excuses as well.
00:23:00
Speaker
um And sometimes your excuses can almost be little lies to yourself. Excuses can be lies, things that you tell yourself.
00:23:11
Speaker
I tell myself that, you know, there's only one life and that I'm not going to do this right now because it's super sunny. And let we'll go use the example of summer because that's how I was this whole summer and summer short. So I'm going to take off and go paddle boarding. And even though in one way that's feeding my soul, in another way, it allowed me to make excuses for things that I needed to be doing for my health, for my business, for myself, whatever that is, responsibilities. But I feel like I'm more in tune with all of that now. And definitely since the start of this podcast, I have been laser focused on finding different solutions, growing as a practitioner, as a human, as I dive deeper and untangle and learn about what my hormones are doing as well. So really getting out of my own way. And I feel like that's definitely something that I'm going to continue doing. um
00:24:03
Speaker
But the grace piece is there too, I wanted to add, Kim, because sometimes I would give myself too much grace. And we talk about grace a lot with our clients, with ourselves in this podcast. But I think it's important that I always remind myself, grace is not my permission slip to let go of my responsibilities and to make excuses, right? love Because sometimes, Akim, you know me, I give myself a little too much grace and I'm like, bye, going paddleboarding every day for the week. And like, that's not necessarily the grace we need when we talk about responsibility and ownership. Well, so much of what you just said, i love, Tanya. And I think that's what this is all about. Like our health, like is not like we talk about the journey and not the destination, right? And so taking these moments in time to re-examine, you know, the reality of what are like, taking a look at where we are at in terms of our goals, take a look at our men, like how our,
00:25:13
Speaker
mentality is when it comes to giving ourself grace versus making an excuse and kind of really thinking that through a little bit. So I love your point about those two things are great. Like that paddle boarding does give you joy. And we talk about making sure that as women, we allow ourselves those times of joy because they do so much for our nervous system. They do so much for our health and our longevity.
00:25:40
Speaker
But also, as you said, reflecting and knowing when you are putting something off that's important for your health and maybe using that as an excuse. So that self-reflection piece is so important. And none of us can do that for you.
00:25:57
Speaker
This is where you have to be the one to do it. Right? And deciding, am I giving myself grace because I deserve grace, which is everyone does, or am I using this grace as a permission slip to not do the thing yet again?
00:26:12
Speaker
Kim, put down your mirror because I see my reflection in what you're saying. Because that is me. I take ownership, you know, and I think though, a lot of times we can see some of our traits as negative, but I see that as negative in terms of When I'm putting something off, but I also see it as positive in terms of the person that I am leading by example for my clients, my friends, my family. I know so many women have that guilt piece. I know anytime I post that I'm doing absolutely nothing, I'll have a comment from at least three people to say, thank you. I needed that. Or, you know, thanks for the reminder, but it's that balance piece. So it's ah it's a good trait to have. And it's also that balance as well. But I think you're right, not using grace as a permission slip, but like you said earlier, grace
00:27:07
Speaker
in realizing that we're not taking responsibility and maybe making excuses. It looks like what you said, it's a reassessing the situation and maybe changing the structure. If your goal is clear and you know you want to get your goal, but you're spending every single day paddle boarding and in the back of your mind, knowing that you're avoiding the goal that is realistic and that you really do want to achieve, maybe it's time to kind of change the structure, right? And get curious about, what's the avoidance piece and how can you, you know, reassess that goal and get back on
Practical Tips for Overcoming Excuses
00:27:44
Speaker
the train? That's the kind of grace we need. I love that, Tanya. Love that. And I love that word curiosity because this is the self-reflection piece too. Like instead of going on to that negative self-talk of like, oh, I didn't do X, Y, Z again. And I went paddleboard instead of doing this. Well,
00:28:03
Speaker
It's more of the curiosity about why am I avoiding this? Because paddleboarding isn't the excuse. Paddleboarding is wonderful. Paddleboarding is important to add to your life. But where is that avoidance piece? Why are you avoiding what you know to be true? And then you're giving yourself that negative talk of, oh, I did the paddleboarding instead of. Well, no, you're avoiding digging deeper, getting curious, getting A thousand percent. Why every day do you just want to get up, pack your cooler, put your bathing suit on, hop in your car and drive into the mountains? What are you- People always want to do that, Eanya.
00:28:40
Speaker
We could do that for a living, but for sure. you Why are you pressing the snooze button every morning? Why are you saying I'm so tired I can't do the thing even though I wanted to get up? Or what like you said, why am I not taking time to do that meal prep? Why am I avoiding this?
00:28:57
Speaker
Sometimes it's because it's boring. But also, like why am I not putting the structure in place to make this a priority? Yeah. For sure. And maybe we can reflect on this and we'll put this these in the show notes, maybe a couple couple prompts for journaling. Things like, is the goal wrong or is it just the structure?
00:29:17
Speaker
Right? Is the expectation unrealistic or... Or have we just not examined it as much and broken it down? Here's a good one, I think, that we could all reflect on. The why's, you know, why we don't do things.
00:29:34
Speaker
Where does support need to add it love in order for us, you know what I mean, to get to our goal and stop making excuses? Where do we need to support our circumstances so we can stop making excuses and work towards our goal?
00:29:48
Speaker
Totally. And this can go to all the people who are a little bit type A or controlling, out there control freaks like me out there. Sometimes the acceptance of support piece is necessary or needed or will be very helpful, but it's difficult to accept, right? Sometimes that's a tough one.
00:30:10
Speaker
So, but yeah, where does the support need to be added in order for you to achieve those goals? And my, you know, what I've been learning this past year is where is perfectionism blocking the consistency or blocking the actions, those little actions that you're taking?
00:30:30
Speaker
Good one. And like reframing can be simple. Maybe, you know, your goal is to increase your cardio. Well, maybe you have to be doing 10 minutes instead of 60. If you set your goal that every day you're going to do an hour of cardio and every day that doesn't happen and you're too busy, you're too tired, the excuses pop up, then maybe you need to start with 10.
00:30:51
Speaker
Yeah. You know? like And what I love about doing that, Tanya, too, is those 10 minutes, once they're consistent and habitual, those 10 minutes, 100% are going to change into 60. Right? Absolutely. Absolutely. It's ah like, I think we talk about the yoga teachers... You know, example of getting to the mat is the hardest part. Starting is is the hardest part. Those 10 minutes that you find are going to change to 60 sooner than you think. But as Tanya said, that mentality of let's start with 10 is so, can be key to getting you to actually start.
00:31:28
Speaker
For sure. And like, think about the big meal prep piece because that's something that's important to a lot of us listening right now. Why don't you start, like you said, with just getting to the kitchen.
00:31:39
Speaker
Put on a podcast. Put on this podcast. Yep. Same wavelength there, Kim. Put on our podcast, put on a favorite TV show, put on your favorite record and make it simple. So another concession can be simpler meals instead of elaborate plans. Just, you know, if the excuse is I don't have time to spend two hours in the kitchen, don't. Spend 20 minutes and make a healthy meal.
00:32:05
Speaker
Absolutely. Absolutely. One pan meals, sheet pan meals, make it. with whole simple ingredients. It doesn't have to be elaborate or fancy. 30 minute meals.
00:32:18
Speaker
And I think too, like what we talked about in the last episode, these grandiose life-changing things can be very, very intimidating. So if you do find yourself as somebody who is making the excuses consistently or not able to start or, you know, fewer goals, think fewer goals, simpler goals, and habitually, then as they fit organically into your life, as we said, those 10 minutes will turn into 60.
Empowerment Through Responsibility
00:32:48
Speaker
Or start with that one goal and then you add the next goal as opposed to trying to do all or nothing.
00:32:55
Speaker
Exactly. It's that organic puzzle we always talk about. And I don't know, at the end of the day, if we have an honest conversation with ourself, whether you meditate, you talk to a bestie about this, or you just sit and think about it.
00:33:11
Speaker
where are you not roate Where are you not taking responsibility in in your life right now? I know that we all have spots. I have tons of spots personally, and I know them. But when I sit and reflect on them,
00:33:23
Speaker
it you know becomes very clear how these spots allow me to make excuses. And here's another good one. What excuses do you make the most often?
00:33:35
Speaker
That's a good one, Tanya. Yeah. Is it about time? Is it about energy level? Because that just that question, I love this question, Tanya, because just that is going to help you dig deep into the why, right? Like what we said about paddleboarding, it wasn't the paddleboarding.
00:33:53
Speaker
it's It's the why am I avoiding, right? Why am I avoiding this goal that is important for me? And when you hear what you're using, what the then you can evaluate. If it's time, then you can do that little inventory that we talked about and think about where is my time going? If I keep saying I don't have time, well, where is my time going?
00:34:14
Speaker
And I love going back to the what excuses do I use most often. I'll tell you for me. Why I was just blowing off most of the summer and, you know, going paddleboarding in between my clients and whatever, because I was working on something that I wasn't passionate about.
00:34:29
Speaker
And when I really sat down and I really, so this was the goal for me. The goal was, it wasn't necessarily the structure. It was the goal. I wasn't passionate about, about what I was working on. So I didn't want to do it. So I didn't do it. So guess what?
00:34:43
Speaker
I scrapped it and I'm working on different things now. And I changed the goal. And I'm not paddleboarding because it's the dead of winter, but I don't feel the need to get in my car and leave every day because I'm passionate about what I'm doing. So sometimes what excuses do I use most often not only shows you what excuses you're making, but it can show you that the why might need to be evaluated as well. The goal might be off, might be time for a different one I love it, Tanya, because had you not done that, have you had you not done that self-reflection, you would have been continuing to try to push to a goal that didn't match with what you really wanted. And we're not saying, like, I know you're not saying here that...
00:35:23
Speaker
you know, your health and wellness goals, like meal prep is easy. No, sometimes it's boring and you need to like, you need to make time for it. But it's more about, does it align with your priorities? And if a goal is no longer in alignment with where you're going, or you feel like you're pushing to something that really...
00:35:44
Speaker
doesn't, you know, as you said, you're not passionate about or doesn't align with you. Understanding that and seeing that will allow you to shift your goal and then to free up that time and to stop, you know, stop paying attention to something that's no longer necessary for you.
00:36:01
Speaker
Exactly. So it's not necessarily saying that every single thing that we work on to get to our goals is fun because meal prep really is never that fun. We try to make it funner. yes We can make it fun. Put on the podcast. We try. Exactly.
00:36:16
Speaker
But... the goal When the goal is important to you, you find the time to do it. When the goal is not important to you, self-reflection will make you realize that. And then you don't push through the hard stuff because it doesn't matter. But you're always going to push through the hard stuff when your goal matters, right? and I have a another one too.
00:36:35
Speaker
Yes. And it goes back to what we said at the very beginning. What or who am I blaming that actually needs to be reflected back at me? Right.
00:36:46
Speaker
good point Right? The who or the what am I blaming that actually is is me? Yes. And that's what self-reflection does most of the time, the harsh truth. And i know I know you guys, I know for some of you right now, you're walking, you're in your car and you're going, yeah, that's me. Yeah. It's me. Right?
00:37:07
Speaker
But that's such a powerful piece and so important in taking back our power because at the end of the day, Responsibility is my favorite word. Responsibility becomes our freedom. Responsibility is not my favorite word. Freedom is. So let me redefine that. Responsibility is freedom. It's the key to our freedom.
00:37:32
Speaker
being responsible for our lives, our goals, our choices, no matter what circumstances we are in, right? And anything that we say I'm responsible for, it's also changeable by us because we are responsible for the choices that we're making. Absolutely. It gives us our power back.
00:37:53
Speaker
It gives us our power back. And when you think about it, We don't necessarily, well, I guess we all do need more time, but this is where are we putting our time, right? Like what are we doing with our time? Take that, take that inventory, you know, and as you said in the beginning, Tanya, we don't need more motivation or permission. What we need is that ownership piece and that consistency piece.
00:38:21
Speaker
A thousand percent. So, At the end of the day, we're not telling you that you need to start over, that you need to redefine all of your goals. But what we are saying is that maybe you do need to reflect.
00:38:37
Speaker
You need to then see if your goals are really... part of your heart and what you're looking for, redefine. And you just need to start again, but differently, a different approach, a different structure. And with that reflection of your beautiful face staring right back at you in the mirror saying, it's on me. All of this is on me.
00:38:59
Speaker
I am responsible. Absolutely. And this is what we hope for you for 2026 is that things will be different this year, right? No more excuses. And we wanted to kick off this year saying this because let's get the excuses part out of the way and let's take that control back. Right?
00:39:18
Speaker
for whatever goals you may have, health, finances, whatever it may be. Prioritizing ourselves, right? and And deciding that we're no more excuses. We're going to get out of ourselves get out of our own way.
00:39:33
Speaker
Yep. And that's it. That's how we're going to leave it. Literally forward. Yeah, I won't say one of our favorite songs. We know it. Move, be, get out the way. That's what I want to say, but we're keeping it PG-13 on the show. For all my millennials, we're going out singing that song. Move, get out the way. Get out the way.
00:39:54
Speaker
I love it. ka Until next week. All right, everyone. Happy 2026. No more excuses. We'll see you next week. Bye, guys.
Conclusion & Listener Engagement
00:40:07
Speaker
Hey guys, thanks so much for hanging out with us today. If this episode resonated with you, we would love it if you would hit like, subscribe to the podcast and share it with a friend. We love to hear from you because let's be honest, this show is for you. If you have a topic you'd love us to tackle or want to learn more about something we talked about today, send us a message. We got you.
00:40:30
Speaker
Stay connected with us on social media at whatsmyageagain.podcast for even more knowledge and inspiration between episodes. Kim and I aren't doctors or your healthcare practitioners.
00:40:43
Speaker
Everyone's body is unique, so always consult your own healthcare care provider before starting something new.