Transcript
Speaker: Welcome to Prime Space, a Prime Coaching Academy podcast with your host, Elias Skultori. Coaches, a few weeks ago I had Fogelin as a guest here Prime Space.
Speaker: And at the beginning of that episode, there was a moment when I was introducing her It was very special.
Speaker: I didn't say much in the moment because we had a huge topic to cover, but I made a mental note of it. The episode's title is The Future of Coaching, and if you haven't yet, I encourage you to listen to it later.
Speaker: Anne has had a brilliant career in coaching, and I was trying to convey some of her accomplishments. And I said that she is an expert in coaching.
Speaker: I use this word expert.
Speaker: When I passed the microphone back to her, she of course thanked me and thanked for being back at Prime Space. And immediately she went on and said,
Speaker: I do not consider myself an expert because I wake up every day being very aware about how much I don't know. And of course, when I rep replied to her, I said, you spoke like a true expert, my friend, the one who knows how much they don't know.
Speaker: This was so beautiful. And I'd like to use this last episode of Prime Space Season 4 to expand on this a little bit.
Speaker: On the very first day of our Level 1 coach training program, we share with our students what we call the ah the coaching tenets. These are short statements we believe encapsulate the core of the coaching mindset.
Speaker: What is the proposition of coaching? What is so distinct about this practice? What must a coach embody to be able to properly position themselves in front of their clients?
Speaker: The Coaching Tenants is an exclusive module of Prime Coaching Academy, and it provides these new coaches with what we believe to be the foundational concepts of coaching.
Speaker: on which all the skills and everything else that we will address later are built from. We believe that once a coach understands and embodies these fundamental ideas, everything else in coaching becomes so much easier.
Speaker: One of these tenets is Coaching is a humbling and courageous act.
Speaker: Coaching is a humbling and courageous act.
Speaker: What do we mean by that?
Speaker: Well, coaching is about our clients. Coaching is about the story, the journey, the development of this other person.
Speaker: They are the ones center stage, not us.
Speaker: And the sooner we realize that in that space, our beliefs, our resourcefulness, our knowledge... our intuition, our experience, our brilliance are virtually irrelevant there, the better we will be able to support them.
Speaker: You've heard me say this before, perhaps too many times. We live 24-7 in this little space between our ears, and we tend to believe that the whole universe, this vast expanse of human existence and even nature at large,
Speaker: is encapsulated in our very limited perception. We tend to believe that the world is what we perceive it to be. We give so much credit to the thoughts and conclusions our minds create that we see them as definitive.
Speaker: And at the same time, Because on some level, we realize we are so small. In order for us to feel some sense of control, sense of security, a sense of identity, we want, we need our thoughts to be validated by others.
Speaker: We need others to believe what we believe. And as human species, we have even tried to codify some of these beliefs in an attempt to make people do what we want them to do, be who we want them to be.
Speaker: This, that I believe, is universal truth.
Speaker: However,
Speaker: what do we know?
Speaker: What do we truly know about what is happening in the heart of this person in front of us?
Speaker: We may have the ability to empathize, I hope, to give support. We may be able to observe, perhaps even dare to share some of the thoughts that come up for us, ask a question.
Speaker: but we are not living their lives. We're not there having their experience. We want to believe we do. We want to believe we know what they are feeling and what they are supposed to do, what's happening.
Speaker: But as highly as we may think of ourselves, we actually know nothing.
Speaker: If we stay on the surface trying to solve the problem, yeah, we may be able to help them momentarily. They may feel satisfied. They may even think we are brilliant.
Speaker: Oh, you are such a good coach. You're the best coach.
Speaker: Which makes us feel good, right? But can you see the vicious circle here? In this scenario, who steals the spotlight?
Speaker: Who is truly center stage? What does the process become all about? Who is truly being empowered? Who is losing their power?
Speaker: Clients coming to us because of what we know? Clients coming to us because we are so smart, so intuitive, so brilliant?
Speaker: Let's get a grip.
Speaker: How is that of any help?
Speaker: From an early age, we are encouraged and rewarded both personally and professionally by our ability to navigate the world, solve problems, and think independently. We build our sense of self based on what we do, what we know, what we have, and how much others recognize who we are.
Speaker: But in coaching... if we truly want to empower the other, if we truly want to be at service to the other, first, it is imperative that we have the awareness to see when we are getting full of ourselves and then the ability to be humble.
Speaker: to put our quote-unquote brilliance aside so that they can claim their space. They can notice their brilliance. They can acknowledge their own power.
Speaker: Yes, skills and standards are crucial. Getting a certification is a good thing. And I'm pretty sure that you can do that actually fairly easily.
Speaker: But what is the level of courage we need to develop to know, to see, to admit how much we don't know? That's when we begin to truly listen.
Speaker: That's when we become sincerely curious and are able to customize ah simple but powerful question. That's when we begin to have a glimpse of excellence.
Speaker: That is the true path to an MCC.
Speaker: So coach, what do you need to let go of?
Speaker: What is the layer you need to shed? Where is the resistance coming from?
Speaker: What are you so afraid of?
Speaker: Where can you find the ability to fully occupy your own space without the need to step on anyone else's?
Speaker: Humility and courage.
Speaker: That's at the core of coaching.
Speaker: Thank you so much for listening. Today I'm wrapping up season four. Thank you so much for your comments, your emails, your testimonials, your likes. Thank you for your participation. i'll take a short break.
Speaker: But I am already working on season five and i am truly so excited about the guests that will be coming to Prime Space and the topics we will cover.
Speaker: So please subscribe so you know when we start again and please share these episodes with others. It's a true honor for me to be here with you. Thank you for your commitment to coaching, for bringing this mindset to the world.
Speaker: I love you and I'll see you next time.
