Transcript
Speaker: Let's Play Pretend is an explicit podcast with subject matter that may be disturbing to some listeners.
Speaker: Content warnings are found in the description of every episode.
Speaker: Yeah, Cody's laughing, so it's good.
Speaker: Let's Play Pretend!
Speaker: Let's Play Pretend!
Speaker: Hello everybody, Jenkins here.
Speaker: As you can see, there's an extra episode uploaded today.
Speaker: Oh, I'm so excited as one of our producers is- Hey!
Speaker: Stop it.
Speaker: No!
Speaker: You told me to do this intro and I'm going to do it honestly.
Speaker: I did, but I gave you a script.
Speaker: Yes, and fuck you too.
Speaker: I'm gonna go fuck you too!
Speaker: Whatever, as long as I continue to get my cheese balls, I'm not concerned.
Speaker: You'll get paid to fix the script!
Speaker: Either way, you see there are two episodes that have dropped today.
Speaker: This one here is...
Speaker: Asshole!...the end of episode eight.
Speaker: Nick over there, I said shut up.
Speaker: Messed up.
Speaker: I said shut up again!
Speaker: I don't want to!
Speaker: You told me to do this, now let me do this!
Speaker: He has messed up the editing, and so we have to release the remainder of Episode 8 now.
Speaker: That way the rest of everything carries cohesion.
Speaker: With that being said, this will be very short, but I think maybe... Ah, yes, I have the control now.
Speaker: I think Nick is going to add in some blooper segments and some fun things to make this episode enjoyable, laughable, and just, well, embarrassing because he messed up so badly.
Speaker: Oh, shut up!
Speaker: Thank you very much, and enjoy the show.
Speaker: Hey everybody, before we actually get into the show, this is Nick.
Speaker: I hope that little scene was fun for you.
Speaker: Yes, I made a mistake and I thought I had more content the way it uploaded into my DAW was not correct, so I didn't have as much space to split the episode as I thought I did.
Speaker: So either way, we're going to go ahead and give you the conclusion of what was episode eight now.
Speaker: And I'm going to throw a couple of bloopers in there.
Speaker: Maybe I'll throw in, I don't know.
Speaker: I'm just going to go through my backlog and see what I've got.
Speaker: I'm recording this before I've done any of the editing for it.
Speaker: So I hope you enjoy.
Speaker: We're very proud of what it is we've put out so far.
Speaker: I'm sorry for this mistake and I'm guaranteeing it will happen again.
Speaker: There's no way it won't.
Speaker: Either way, enjoy the show.
Speaker: I'm going to go feed Jenkins.
Speaker: Let's see where we get.
Speaker: And you are face to face with a man holding a gun pointed right at you.
Speaker: Honestly, this isn't so bad.
Speaker: You can't see his face because of the tactical mask he's wearing.
Speaker: Look, man, I hope that you're here to help us.
Speaker: I got my back up against the door trying to hold the door shut.
Speaker: There is something big out there.
Speaker: I don't know what you're going through, but I'm going to go ahead and get something that we're going through.
Speaker: Shut up.
Speaker: Do you not see this man has a gun to our face?
Speaker: Yeah, and there's a monster chasing us.
Speaker: I don't know if one's worse than the other.
Speaker: Without saying a word, he pushes past you and just shoves the first heavy thing that he can find in front of the door.
Speaker: And that is when you all realize something very strange about this man.
Speaker: He is dressed head to toe in military garb.
Speaker: Ryan starts helping him.
Speaker: I move out of the way if he's pushing something to block the door.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: So you move out of the way.
Speaker: Ryan starts to help him.
Speaker: Sam and Arthur, what are you guys doing?
Speaker: I'm helping.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Yeah, Sam will start pushing things.
Speaker: Sam will also start pushing things.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So you guys are able to block up the door, you guys hear the footsteps approaching even faster than before, and they pass you.
Speaker: You were able to get into this room without the monster noticing where you were at.
Speaker: And after a brief second, the man in the military garb with the combat, with the mask, turns around and looks at you guys, and he doesn't have the gun raised anymore.
Speaker: And from the back of the room, because he's at the door now, you guys are turned around facing the door, so the room is behind you guys at this point.
Speaker: From the back of the room, you hear, guys, is that really you?
Speaker: Ashley?
Speaker: It's Ashley.
Speaker: It's really me.
Speaker: Ryan doesn't look back and keeps his eyes on the man.
Speaker: Sam immediately whips around just to look at Ashley.
Speaker: And it's Ashley and she's in her full 100% alive glory.
Speaker: Hey, Sam, you might want to check that before you start believing it.
Speaker: I don't, I don't know.
Speaker: I know.
Speaker: I know.
Speaker: But just show her the ring.
Speaker: Sam fumbles a little bit and pulls the ring out of her pocket.
Speaker: And just... Holds it out.
Speaker: Do you... Can you tell me whose this is?
Speaker: I can.
Speaker: And, uh... You guys are gonna think a little bit less of me.
Speaker: I can assure you that.
Speaker: Um...
Speaker: You know how my mom runs a funeral home.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Well, uh, the, uh, the ritual called for a finger of a father and, uh,
Speaker: But you see, this body came in and it was a dad that got in a motorcycle accident and he died and he was supposed to be cremated and I didn't think about it.
Speaker: Before she could even finish her sentence, she drops the ring.
Speaker: You cut the finger off of a dead man?
Speaker: You know how badly I wanted to see Chris?
Speaker: How are you alive?
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: I lit the fire in the tree house after pushing you guys all to the wall.
Speaker: I lit the fire to see Chris and everything went black.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: I woke up here.
Speaker: Ashley, we watched you die.
Speaker: What do you mean you watched him die?
Speaker: The thing that came through, yeah, it wore your brother's face and it snapped your neck.
Speaker: Wait, what?
Speaker: That... that can't be.
Speaker: Yeah, well, that's just one thing on a long list of things that shouldn't be, so... Like that monster in the fucking hallway!
Speaker: Good point.
Speaker: Really quick, before we finish the scene, I want you to all roll me sanity.
Speaker: Sanity.
Speaker: Son of a... I rolled an 18 on a 68.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: I rolled a 99 on a 66.
Speaker: Oh no.
Speaker: I have shit luck tonight.
Speaker: I rolled a 37 out of 46.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: 25 out of 69.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Everybody that passed lose one.
Speaker: Um... Brick, were you the only one to fail?
Speaker: I think so.
Speaker: And it was a nice, clean fail.
Speaker: But on the plus side, it was a D4 minus one, so you only take three.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: So you don't have to do fight, flight, or faint.
Speaker: Cool.
Speaker: That could have been bad.
Speaker: Now your back is still to Ashley, correct?
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Same for Ned.
Speaker: Ned's paying attention to the armored man.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: I think Sam's the only one who's turned around.
Speaker: Arthur, you're still facing the military guy too?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: As you guys are talking to Ashley, you see the military man reach up and take the mask off.
Speaker: And you see Chris and he goes, what do you mean he was wearing my face?
Speaker: What the fuck?
Speaker: No, no, no, no, no.
Speaker: Ryan Spear comes up.
Speaker: I pull out my knives.
Speaker: And that's where we end the episode.
Speaker: God bless you.
Speaker: I was just gonna say Sam freezes hearing Chris's voice.
Speaker: Because she knows that's his voice.
Speaker: Oh, she 100% knows that's his voice.
Speaker: I hate that I... Oh, God.
Speaker: No, you go right ahead.
Speaker: We ain't recording no more for the show.
Speaker: You wanna talk over me?
Speaker: Go for it.
Speaker: The moment he said dressed in military garb, I'm like, ah, fuck.
Speaker: So, yeah, that was an episode.
Speaker: We recorded for almost two hours and I don't know how I'm awake right now.
Speaker: Also, I put Sam down.
Speaker: I was going to say, are you going to put me down or are you just still hauling me over your shoulder?
Speaker: No, no, I will set you down gently.
Speaker: And I'm hoping that we can find like a Walgreens or something like that.
Speaker: So I don't know, maybe we can find some cleaning stuff and whatnot.
Speaker: We can make you feel a little bit more comfortable.
Speaker: I ain't trying to let everybody else know, but I had your ass pretty close to my face.
Speaker: She did not canonically shit herself.
Speaker: I think your soundbites differ.
Speaker: I deleted the soundbite from my list.
Speaker: Thank God.
Speaker: Yeah, you're welcome.
Speaker: Do we pass the call?
Speaker: We can take a pause and then we'll just do a 3-2-1 back to it.
Speaker: I'm also looking up a directory of Cherryvale Mall right now so that I can send it to Brack.
Speaker: I've been to Cherryvale a couple of times.
Speaker: Oh, have you?
Speaker: Yeah, I was going to say, the food court is on the lower level.
Speaker: They used to have cool stuff.
Speaker: They still do.
Speaker: I haven't been there in a long time.
Speaker: They have tilt.
Speaker: Oh, they got tilt?
Speaker: Yeah, dude, they got tilt arcade now.
Speaker: It's two stories.
Speaker: It's the old Sears.
Speaker: Sears, yeah, the Sears store.
Speaker: Both levels are now an arcade.
Speaker: Yeah, Matt, we got to go sometime.
Speaker: It's super cool.
Speaker: Yeah, it's an arcade, a bowling alley, all of it.
Speaker: Last time I was over there, there was a grenade scare in the parking lot, so I didn't, like, want to be there.
Speaker: And now we're never getting sponsored by Cherryvale.
Speaker: That's just Rockford, baby.
Speaker: All right.
Speaker: Melanie's back, so Jordan, lead us in with a 3, 2, 1, and back to plot.
Speaker: Yep.
Speaker: 3, 2, 1.
Speaker: Hey everybody, it's Nick again, jumping in.
Speaker: I know this wasn't very long, and immediately after this is another full-length episode for you to listen to.
Speaker: I hope you're enjoying the story so far.
Speaker: Again, I'm very sorry for this mishap with the recording, but as of recording right now, we're getting very close to the time where Jordan and Melanie are going to take a little bit of paternity time off.
Speaker: So...
Speaker: with their new young one Piper coming into the world and their younger son.
Speaker: We just want to wish them the best and we want to give them that time that they need to spend with family.
Speaker: Family always comes first and taking care of ourselves is always paramount.
Speaker: So thank you so much for listening to us.
Speaker: Thank you for understanding why this had to be this way.
Speaker: I hope you guys enjoyed the end of what should have been episode eight.
Speaker: I don't know if we're gonna call it 8.5 or 9 or blah blah blah.
Speaker: I added a couple little blooper clips.
Speaker: I wanna save a couple for when they're on paternity leave.
Speaker: I wanna make sure that we have content to keep releasing for you while it is that we're not able to record on a continual basis.
Speaker: We have some really fun things coming up for you.
Speaker: We have a side arc that's going to be coming up in not too long.
Speaker: We have a whole different game system.
Speaker: Breck Black, Mr. Ryan Winchester, runs a D&D game for us.
Speaker: It's a lot of fun, and we get up to a whole lot of nonsense just kind of like in this show.
Speaker: But I think you're going to like it.
Speaker: I mean...
Speaker: We're just trying our best to give you guys content that you would like to listen to.
Speaker: We hope you enjoy us and we would love to hear your feedback about what it is we're doing.
Speaker: Use the hashtag LPPP.
Speaker: Let me take that again.
Speaker: Use the hashtag LPPP.
Speaker: We'll make sure that somebody, if not all of us, are on the socials looking up that hashtag and seeing what you guys have said to us.
Speaker: Check us out on Twitter.
Speaker: Check us out on Facebook.
Speaker: Check us out on TikTok.
Speaker: Check us out on Instagram.
Speaker: We may or may not use them consistently, but we do check them and make sure and see if anybody is active on them.
Speaker: There's also a link to the subreddit down below.
Speaker: If you have fan theories or you have ideas, go ahead and post them down below and really use that hashtag LPPpod.
Speaker: It helps us so much with finding what you guys say and we want to make sure we interact with you, our viewers, as much as possible.
Speaker: So I'm sorry this was so short.
Speaker: That's my bad.
Speaker: I made a mistake.
Speaker: And we're going to see where we can go from here.
Speaker: But we have a lot coming for you.
Speaker: We have a lot more content.
Speaker: We have a lot more quality.
Speaker: And we are ready to continue this show.
Speaker: Thank you so much for listening.
Speaker: And we'll see you in hopefully just a couple minutes as you jump into episode nine.
Speaker: Ha ha ha!
