If you like Storm, folks, then tune the heck in to this one! We delve deep into the identity of Ororo Munroe through an incredible, character-driven run, including Chris Claremont & Barry Windsor-Smith's iconic LIFEDEATH! Plus Selene, the Hellfire Club, Rachel Summers, and even some ROM Spaceknight-adjacent stuff! 

Topics Discussed:

ROM Spaceknight. Drowning survey. Egg. We’re two guys with alive dads, and we won’t apologize for it. Does Rogue know how her powers work? LIFEDEATH! WRAITHKILL! Analog phones. Storm vs Forge. Superheroes with guns. Counting Storm’s suitors. Alien soul. Jaime Rodriguez is here! “That’s meant to be sipped.” Sexual colonial-era fashion. DelCo Amanda Sefton. Child militia.

TIMESTAMPS

0:00 - The best theme song in the biz

7:16 - Pat’s Email Corner

20:28 - X-Men Related Things

22:21 - Uncanny X-Men #185: Public Enemy

38:16 - Uncanny X-Men #186: LIFEDEATH

1:08:50 - Uncanny X-Men #187: Wraithkill!

1:19:41 - Uncanny X-Men #188: Legacy of the Lost

1:35:09 - Uncanny X-Men #189: Two Girls Out to Have Fun!

1:54:00 - Final Thoughts

1:57:51 - Pat’s Steals n Deals



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56 - Powerless - Uncanny X-Men #185-189

There comes a time in every little girl's life where she must shed the follies of youth and grow into a super-cool secret ninja assassin mutant with her big hairy friend Wolverine. And this, for Kitty Pryde, is that time. 

Matt and Pat dig into the 6-issue miniseries KITTY PRYDE AND WOLVERINE from 1984 and are pretty damn stoked about it.

Topics Discussed:

Family-owned banks. A sumo wrestler in a fine Italian suit. The dumbest we've ever seen Kitty Pryde. Two bank break-ins. SHE REEKS. Wolverine's sweater crop-top. "Yes. We shall do crimes together." Ninja baby. Best Kitty costume yet! ITBTIAWIDBWIDBIVN. Boning on the rooftops. STINK BOMB! Logan covers himself in trash. Does Yukio care about dying? "STOP HANGING OUT WITH YUKIO!" How do you stab Wolverine in the heart? Whiny Carmen Pryde. THE RETURN OF THE UPDRAFT. Logun. Share the bridges! Rocky IV. Thor Winter! "Agghhh! Ghost!" Wild genes. SHADOWCAT!!! Mariko's Mariko wig. "SURPRISE SUCKER!" "screwed her on the roof." 

TIMESTAMPS:

0:00  - Intro

6:35  - Pat's Email Corner

24:45 - X-Men Related Things

28:55 - Background

31:50  - Issue #1  "Lies"

45:45  - Issue #2  "Terror"

53:48  - Issue #3 "Death"

1:03:30  - Issue #4  "Rebirth"

1:19:20  - Issue #5  "Courage"

1:31:22  - Issue #6 "Honor

1:49:38 - [REDACTED]'s Steals and Deals

 1:54:05 - Goodbyes!



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55 - Kitty Pryde & Wolverine #1-6

We're flying back up north this week, and visiting our favorite Canadian Super Team, Alpha Flight! But it's not all fun and games, as we work through pain, loss, and a pile of scrambled eggs. This is where Alpha Flight realllly gets good, so tune in!

TOPICS DISCUSSED:

Pee-wee Herman. John Byrne, fashionista. Bing-bonging Namor. Ursula K Leguin. Solemn, respectful silence, except for the screeching owl. Smart Alec’s disturbing fate. Pierre Trudeau’s resignation. Snowbird is 6 years old. Not a good-time scream. Saving the stroller. All vampires are dead. Draw us a toilet. Elizabeth Twoyoungmen is here! Douglas Thompson returns. Like a moth between the stubby fingers of a small boy. FISH SHIP. Madison Jeffries is here! We’re not canceling Puck. Jeff VanderMeer. “Dialogue.” Wolverine! What the FUCK Walter. Big year. Chekhov’s scrambled eggs. Good issue. You’re in a team book dude.

TIMESTAMPS:

0:45 - Hello and Pee-wee Herman impressions

2:29 - Alpha Flight recap and initial thoughts

11:53 - Pat’s Email Corner

22:08 - X-Men-related things we’ve done this week

25:33 - Alpha Flight 13 - “Nightmare”

38:58 - Alpha Flight 14 - “Biology Class”

57:19 - Alpha Flight 15 - “Blind Date”

1:12:22 - Alpha Flight 16 - “…and Forsaking All Others…”

1:26:24 - Alpha Flight 17 - “Dreams Die Hard…”

1:39:35 - Alpha Flight 18 - “How Long Will A Man Lie In The Earth ‘Ere He Rot?”

2:00:00 - Final Thoughts

2:05:10 - Pat’s Steals ‘n’ Deals

2:09:55 - Signoffs



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54 - Alpha Flight #13-18

Bill Sienkiewicz arrives on the New Mutants to deliver us the absolutely fantastic Demon Bear Saga and the super fun arrival of Warlock and Doug to the book! It's so much fun, we had to bring along a guest to enjoy it with us. 

So Matt and Pat welcome Stephen Hesson from the Batting Around podcast to dive into it with us. We talk about X-Men: Evolution, Baseball, Marvel Movies, and then rave about Sienkiewicz's art for two hours.

TOPICS DISCUSSED:

BILL SIENKIEWICZ! A panel-breaking bear. Raving about the art so much. Cannonball with a shotgun. Trust us, this man is white. Who is this nurse with the chest hair? "I ain't worried about the Hulk, Bobby." Claremont's fetishization of Indigenous cultures. MEANWHILE, ACROSS THE GALAXY. Lilandra still dawdling. WOLFMAN! SHOOT IT! More raving about the art. Sam the religious himbo. Another Rahne Sinclair head injury. A really uncomfortable race-swap. Lonestar -> Moonstar? "TO: Dr. Strange RE: Demon Bear." Healer the Healer. "Drip Face" Whoops, by the way, Magneto's dead. Some Baseball friends. "ya dumb cluck!" WARLOCK! DOUG! A GREEN CAT ALIEN! LILA CHENEY! A Vrakanin, duh! Stealing a planet? A red-headed pervert Iggy Pop. 

Timestamps

0:00 - Hellos

21:30 - Pat's Email Corner

26:30 - Do anything X-Men related?

34:10 - New Mutants #18 - DEATH-HUNT

49:20 - New Mutants #19 - SIEGE

1:09:30 - New Mutants #20 - Badlands

1:29:20 - New Mutants #21 - Slumber Party!

1:53:05 - New Mutants Annual #1 - The Cosmic Cannonball Caper

2:09:30 - Final thoughts

2:10:35 - Pat's Steals n' Deals

2:14:45 - Goodbyes



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53 - New Mutants #18-21, Annual #1 - Demon Bear Saga

We're finally back to the regular ol' X-Men, and boy oh boy folks, did our patience ever pay off! Join us as we tackle some truly top-tier X-Men issues and start setting things back on course in the Marvel Universe. Plus, two (count em! two!) appearances from Contessa Valentina Allegra de Fontaine! Tune in!

Topics Discussed:

Professor X fanfic. Pilk. Basketball and improv. Is Astro Boy real? Sunfire! Wolverine steals a child. The giant green dragon metaphor. An answering machine. Rogue’s thinking accent. This is not your soup. Storm’s new bedroom. A tough breakup. An all-timer issue. Juggernaut! Selene! Forge is here! Handsome ass. A forbidden Family Guy reference. A fleet of balloon boys.

Timestamps:

0:00 - Saying Hi and Catching Up

10:30 - Pat’s Email Corner

30:30 - X-Men-Related Things We’ve Done

33:44 - Uncanny X-Men #181 : "Tokyo Story"

54:44 - Uncanny X-Men #182: "Madness"

1:13:06 - Uncanny X-Men #183: "He'll Never Make Me Cry"

1:36:47 - Uncanny X-Men #184: "The Past of Future Days"

1:50:30 - Uncanny X-Men Annual #7: "Scavenger Hunt"

2:07:21 - Pat’s Steals ‘n’ Deals



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52 - Uncanny X-Men #181-184 & Annual #7 - Consequences!

Here it is, folks. The Big One. The Event to End* All Events (*start). It's the Toy Company-mandated Jim Stupid-penned Super-Hero Epic SECRET WARS! And, of course, the X-Men are in it. Or something approximating the X-Men.

Matt and Pat struggle their way through this very long saga and have a lot more fun discussing it than reading it. 

Issues: Marvel Super-Heroes Secret Wars (1984) #1-12

Topics Discussed:

Professor X forgot. Galactus and the Wrecking Crew are equals. YOU'RE BEING MEAN TO DOOM. "Ach Nein Zein!" All the good guys fight all the bad guys. The planet's mysterious energies fix Jim Stupid's errors. Spider-Man's gonna rat on ya! The Weight of a Mountain. Everyone's worse than Hitler. The Size of a Solar System. Reed flailing! The chicken feather incident. Dazzler's murder of Klaw. Xavier's power is a joke. "SHUT UP, CYCLOPS!" The New Spider-Woman is here now... The Wasp is DEFINITELY dead. Thing has a good burn. Enchantress just complaining. An arrow hits harder than a bullet. The Wasp was NOT dead, she was just in some death-like stasis. Fightin' Doink-Its. Chippies. The funniest page turn reveal in history!

Timestamps:

1:00 - History of Secret Wars

22:40 - Pat's Email Corner

35:15 - Weapon Jason's recap of Marvel Super-Heroes coming into Secret Wars 

42:00 - Did we do anything Secret?

45:15 - Secret Wars Issue #1

 57:23- Secret Wars Issue #2

1:05:25 - Secret Wars Issue #3

1:12:25 - Secret Wars Issue #4 

1:23:30 - Secret Wars Issue #5

1:30:41 - Secret Wars Issue #6

1:42:25 - CHECK IN

1:46:27 - Secret Wars Issue #7

1:55:00 - Secret Wars Issue #8

2:02:57 - Secret Wars Issue #9

2:08:46 - Secret Wars Issue #10

2:16:52 - Secret Wars Issue #11

2:29:50 - Secret Wars Issue #12

2:44:55 - Pat's Steals and Deals!

2:49:23 - Ending

2:53:54 - SECRET JOKE



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51 - Secret Wars

Oh boy, folks - good episode, bad subject matter! The X-Men visit the Microverse, the Micronauts visit the Macroverse, and Kitty gets punched square in the face! Join us as we tackle what might be the worst run of X-comics so far, and as we spit on the graves of the Micronauts!

***CONTENT WARNING*** for discussion of sexual abuse, manipulation, and grooming from 1:25:00-1:30:00

Topics Discussed:

These are not good comics. Soft canon. Bill Mantlo’s Christmas miracle! Pilk, blood, and lava. Strange Maine. What the hell is happening in the Microverse, and do we care? The Micronauts are here! We’ve got Starjammers at home. Spellbinder. They’re actually toys. Smoking Wolverine. Have you ever been stabbed by a thumbtack? Rocket-powered centaur. Kitty commands a war. Some really gross stuff. We’re pretty upset by the whole thing. Get girlfriends.

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50 - X-Men and the Micronauts

ALPHA FLIGHT IS BACK! And we get a bunch of solo adventures until the team comes together and IMMEDIATELY comes apart. This is a wild ride, folks. Join Matt and Pat on a trip to Canada with our favorite incredibly bad super-hero team.

Topics Discussed:

DEADLY EARNEST. Homosexual implications. "Why are you mushing my face?" The smartest man in the mall. Bashing through a window... sneakily. NEMESIS has a cool costume. Cutting between molecules. Blowing our minds back and forth. We keep forgetting about some Yanchus. Mike T.V. Detective Walter Langkowski. A physics-defying mustache. Blood Battle! Captain America's super super-hero sense. Super Skrull's Super Cancer. The Canadian Dance. OMEGA FLIGHT!! The rudest way to pick someone up from the airport. A long tangent on TV shows from 1966-67. Flashback sucks. ...And One Shall Surely Die. A taxonomy of super-hero teams.

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49 - Alpha Flight #7-12

What if there was another school for mutants? Well, there is! You'd know if you've been paying attention. But we're not holding that against you - instead, we're diving deep into what's going on at the Massachusetts Academy, and the weird team of fighting mutants that they've put together. Plus, more Doug Ramsey! Tune in!

Topics Discussed:

30 minutes of emails. More about Pilk. Jeremy Bear and Jeremy Succession. Brute forcing a brain. Trying to draw a dog. Fuck on the switch. Stevie Hunter is a hero! Doug is a creep. Xavier shooting hoops. Kitty is being a real ding. Doug is NOT a creep we love him! Rusher Street Rebels. The X-Men disappear (ugh). I don't think that's how Jesus works. Compu-scan. The Hellions are here! This kid can't get enough Magnum P.I. Everyone forgot about Doug.

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48 - New Mutants #14-17, Uncanny X-Men #180 - Hellions

This week, we're not hanging out with the X-Men, we're hanging out in Hell with a little girl! Colossus's little sister, to be clear. Illyana Nikolievna Rasputin, who spent an entire 7 years of her life in Limbo, consort to a Demon-Lord, surrounded by dead or corrupted versions of the X-Men we know. The time has come to learn what happened between those 2 panels in X-Men #160 in the MAGIK: STORM AND ILLYANA mini-series!

Topics Discussed:

The Bloodstone Amulet. BELASCO ONLY HAS ONE ARM!? Cat's wild costume. "This was stressful, I must get nude now." Black... crystals? If you're good enough at meditating, you don't have to go to the bathroom. S'ym sucks! A Savage Land Diorama. The blood argument again. The "GET UP!" trope. A Brief Discussion of Time. Pat's least favorite X-Men villain. The Mystery of Wolverine's Nipples. SQUIDGE! Illyana's mutant power?? The Darkchild. So many funny little demon guys! Pat made Matt say "titillates." How do bloodstones work again? Lil' face scratches. A dead tree. S'    ym.


Cozendagen: https://lancasteronline.com/opinion/columnists/it-s-time-for-lancaster-county-to-launch-a-new-winter-holiday-cozendagen-column/article_6d50fcc4-1d13-4666-b2a4-e7fa74dda7a7.html

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47 - Magik - Storm and Illyana #1-4

Comedians Matt Aukamp (Save Your Game, The Very Worst) and Pat Reber (The Very Worst) read the X-Men in chronological order and talk about all the weird, funny, ridiculous, insightful, and interesting things within.

Mutant Menace