Buckle up, listeners, because these issues get weird! Join us as we join the X-Men in medieval Manhattan, campfires, adjacent properties, and even fairytale outer space! We've got bizarre villains, dragons, aliens, and hacky-sacks! Tune in!

Topics Discussed:

Rogue is Green. Wilfred Brimley argues for mutant rights. Xavier/Caliban. Warlock looks like Peter Parker. "Ensorcelment". We wouldn't know if we were medieval times'd.  "I'll Slurp Ya!" Understanding Medieval English. Boob cones. WHERE THE FUCK IS CYPHER!? Why is there a plug here? Kurt's tickle party-forward leadership. Bringing a dragon to an airport. Worthy Foes. "Your planet beat Galactus?" Psi-lock. Claremont wishes he wrote Star Wars. "And I'm the ultra powerful spaceship!" The origin of Diamond White Queen. Lockheed's fuck planet. Pokemon the Movie ass ending.

TIMESTAMPS

1:40 - Pat's Email Corner

13:25 - What Scared You Most As A Child? (Accidental Segment)

15:30 - Where Did We Leave The X-Men?

18:30 - Uncanny X-Men #190 “An Age Undreamed Of”

40:50 - Uncanny X-Men #191 "Raiders of the Lost Temple!"

1:02:00 - Uncanny X-Men #192 "Fun ‘n’ Games!"

1:22:04 - Uncanny X-Men Annual #8 "The Adventures of Lockheed the Space Dragon and His Pet Girl Kitty"

1:41:35 - Final Thoughts

1:46:20 - Pat's Deals n' Steals



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59 - Uncanny X-Men #190-192, Annual #8 - Kulan Gath?

Alpha Flight continues its hot streak on this episode, covering everything from time travel to haunted houses to old Fantastic Four villains. It's funny, it's dark, and it's an open book on the weird thoughts of John Byrne! Join us as we tour Canada in this 4th installment of our Alpha Flight series!

TOPICS DISCUSSED:

Marvel 616 museums. “I was a little bit of a rapscallion.” Grapes vs eggs. “You have a power that may yet save us…Gun!” Boning down to save the world. WHOOPS! Gilded Lily! Steven Devil. Diablo! Pink Pearl! A very cool skeleton man. The Bearded Lady with a tommy gun. Snowbird’s powers. Sasquatch’s powers. A very dark conclusion. A deeeeep dive into John Byrne’s psyche.

TIMESTAMPS:

0:00 - great theme song/hellos

1:30 - history recap

9:16 - Pat’s Email Corner/X-Men-related things

28:40 - Alpha Flight 19 “Turn Again, Turn Again, Time in Thy Flight…”

47:13 - Alpha Flight 20 “Gold and Love Affairs!”

1:00:30 - Alpha Flight 21 “‘Love Wrought New Alchemy…’”

1:11:33 - Alpha Flight #22 “Rub-Out”

1:28:12 - Alpha Flight #23 “Night of the Beast”/Final Thoughts

1:51:17 - Pats Steals ‘n’ Deals

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58 - Alpha Flight #19-23

The Bunkies are BACK, buddies!! Along with our favorite least favorite super-villain THE LIVING PHARAOH/MONOLITH! Matt and Pat read this graphic novel that has very little to do with the X-Men and we have a ton of fun absolutely savaging it.

Enjoy!

Topics Discussed:

Crazy Abdol. Getting suspended for being dumb. All humans are evil. Rutting males. All humans are good. "Let the nice men kill the woman, son." It's easy to infiltrate the Baxter Building. KBONK! The Juggernaut?? Oh, no. The spine of a pig. The Avengers are on vacation. Living Monolith crouching in wait. A tasteful upskirt. The big wire that supplies all of Manhattan with electricity. THOR, IRON MAN, WONDER MAN, STARFOX, HAWKEYE: The Five Mightiest Men on Earth! A mile of Adamantium rope. Another The Living Planet.

Timestamps:

0:00 Intro and Breakfast

5:25 - Living Pharoah/Monolith Background

25:00 - Revenge of the Living Monolith

1:25:35 - Pat's Steals and Deals

1:28:45 - Goodbye!

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BONUS - Revenge of the Living Monolith

Hey, have you noticed anything strange about Bobby and Rahne lately? Like how they keep staring off at the Holy Ghost Church with a haunted look in their eyes? Or how they keep writing fairy tales and attacking Colossus? Well, it's time for Matt and Pat to dive into this mystery and figure out what the heck is goin' on! And we think it might involve a racially insensitive superhero duo created by Bill Mantlo who hate drugs and pimps SO MUCH. Plus, Magneto falls from space, gets ate by a shark, and hits a woman.

All that, plus the most unhinged Pat's Steals and Deals of all time (or at least since Matt bought the Winged Warrior Hat immediately upon learning of it.)

Topics Discussed:

Don't make me beat up drug dealers! A room of dead children. CATS horns up the New Mutants. Gangs of roving criminals. 2-FOR-ONE Glancing Blow/Rahne Head Injury. Is Spider-Man real? Classic mad scientist! "Yeah." A deceptive clown dance. Rahne Sinclair is a rescue dog. FRIEDRICH VON ROEHM! Rahne's Buddy The Elf moment. Not a good fairy tale. "Invulnerable while blastin'" #11. Emmanuel Da Costa doesn't wanna wear the Hellfire outfit. MIRAGE. HARRY MORRELL: NEW FAVORITE CHARACTER. "There's Bobby." Ultimate Fear, Desire, and Customer. Father Michael Bowen is back! Fear.com. Prayer works!

TIMESTAMPS

00:59 - Cloak and Dagger background

13:12 - New Mutants background

14:10 - Pat's Email Corner

26:57 - Did you do anything X-Men related?

34:02 - Marvel Team-Up Annual #6

49:55 - New Mutants #22

1:04:20 - Mew Newtons #23

1:24:36 - New Mutants #24

1:36:02 - New Mutants #25

1:59:46 - Pat's Steals and Deals

2:07:10 - Goodbye!



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57 - New Mutants #22-25 & MTU Annual #6 - Cloak and Dagger

If you like Storm, folks, then tune the heck in to this one! We delve deep into the identity of Ororo Munroe through an incredible, character-driven run, including Chris Claremont & Barry Windsor-Smith's iconic LIFEDEATH! Plus Selene, the Hellfire Club, Rachel Summers, and even some ROM Spaceknight-adjacent stuff! 

Topics Discussed:

ROM Spaceknight. Drowning survey. Egg. We’re two guys with alive dads, and we won’t apologize for it. Does Rogue know how her powers work? LIFEDEATH! WRAITHKILL! Analog phones. Storm vs Forge. Superheroes with guns. Counting Storm’s suitors. Alien soul. Jaime Rodriguez is here! “That’s meant to be sipped.” Sexual colonial-era fashion. DelCo Amanda Sefton. Child militia.

TIMESTAMPS

0:00 - The best theme song in the biz

7:16 - Pat’s Email Corner

20:28 - X-Men Related Things

22:21 - Uncanny X-Men #185: Public Enemy

38:16 - Uncanny X-Men #186: LIFEDEATH

1:08:50 - Uncanny X-Men #187: Wraithkill!

1:19:41 - Uncanny X-Men #188: Legacy of the Lost

1:35:09 - Uncanny X-Men #189: Two Girls Out to Have Fun!

1:54:00 - Final Thoughts

1:57:51 - Pat’s Steals n Deals



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56 - Powerless - Uncanny X-Men #185-189

There comes a time in every little girl's life where she must shed the follies of youth and grow into a super-cool secret ninja assassin mutant with her big hairy friend Wolverine. And this, for Kitty Pryde, is that time. 

Matt and Pat dig into the 6-issue miniseries KITTY PRYDE AND WOLVERINE from 1984 and are pretty damn stoked about it.

Topics Discussed:

Family-owned banks. A sumo wrestler in a fine Italian suit. The dumbest we've ever seen Kitty Pryde. Two bank break-ins. SHE REEKS. Wolverine's sweater crop-top. "Yes. We shall do crimes together." Ninja baby. Best Kitty costume yet! ITBTIAWIDBWIDBIVN. Boning on the rooftops. STINK BOMB! Logan covers himself in trash. Does Yukio care about dying? "STOP HANGING OUT WITH YUKIO!" How do you stab Wolverine in the heart? Whiny Carmen Pryde. THE RETURN OF THE UPDRAFT. Logun. Share the bridges! Rocky IV. Thor Winter! "Agghhh! Ghost!" Wild genes. SHADOWCAT!!! Mariko's Mariko wig. "SURPRISE SUCKER!" "screwed her on the roof." 

TIMESTAMPS:

0:00  - Intro

6:35  - Pat's Email Corner

24:45 - X-Men Related Things

28:55 - Background

31:50  - Issue #1  "Lies"

45:45  - Issue #2  "Terror"

53:48  - Issue #3 "Death"

1:03:30  - Issue #4  "Rebirth"

1:19:20  - Issue #5  "Courage"

1:31:22  - Issue #6 "Honor

1:49:38 - [REDACTED]'s Steals and Deals

 1:54:05 - Goodbyes!



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55 - Kitty Pryde & Wolverine #1-6

We're flying back up north this week, and visiting our favorite Canadian Super Team, Alpha Flight! But it's not all fun and games, as we work through pain, loss, and a pile of scrambled eggs. This is where Alpha Flight realllly gets good, so tune in!

TOPICS DISCUSSED:

Pee-wee Herman. John Byrne, fashionista. Bing-bonging Namor. Ursula K Leguin. Solemn, respectful silence, except for the screeching owl. Smart Alec’s disturbing fate. Pierre Trudeau’s resignation. Snowbird is 6 years old. Not a good-time scream. Saving the stroller. All vampires are dead. Draw us a toilet. Elizabeth Twoyoungmen is here! Douglas Thompson returns. Like a moth between the stubby fingers of a small boy. FISH SHIP. Madison Jeffries is here! We’re not canceling Puck. Jeff VanderMeer. “Dialogue.” Wolverine! What the FUCK Walter. Big year. Chekhov’s scrambled eggs. Good issue. You’re in a team book dude.

TIMESTAMPS:

0:45 - Hello and Pee-wee Herman impressions

2:29 - Alpha Flight recap and initial thoughts

11:53 - Pat’s Email Corner

22:08 - X-Men-related things we’ve done this week

25:33 - Alpha Flight 13 - “Nightmare”

38:58 - Alpha Flight 14 - “Biology Class”

57:19 - Alpha Flight 15 - “Blind Date”

1:12:22 - Alpha Flight 16 - “…and Forsaking All Others…”

1:26:24 - Alpha Flight 17 - “Dreams Die Hard…”

1:39:35 - Alpha Flight 18 - “How Long Will A Man Lie In The Earth ‘Ere He Rot?”

2:00:00 - Final Thoughts

2:05:10 - Pat’s Steals ‘n’ Deals

2:09:55 - Signoffs



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54 - Alpha Flight #13-18

Bill Sienkiewicz arrives on the New Mutants to deliver us the absolutely fantastic Demon Bear Saga and the super fun arrival of Warlock and Doug to the book! It's so much fun, we had to bring along a guest to enjoy it with us. 

So Matt and Pat welcome Stephen Hesson from the Batting Around podcast to dive into it with us. We talk about X-Men: Evolution, Baseball, Marvel Movies, and then rave about Sienkiewicz's art for two hours.

TOPICS DISCUSSED:

BILL SIENKIEWICZ! A panel-breaking bear. Raving about the art so much. Cannonball with a shotgun. Trust us, this man is white. Who is this nurse with the chest hair? "I ain't worried about the Hulk, Bobby." Claremont's fetishization of Indigenous cultures. MEANWHILE, ACROSS THE GALAXY. Lilandra still dawdling. WOLFMAN! SHOOT IT! More raving about the art. Sam the religious himbo. Another Rahne Sinclair head injury. A really uncomfortable race-swap. Lonestar -> Moonstar? "TO: Dr. Strange RE: Demon Bear." Healer the Healer. "Drip Face" Whoops, by the way, Magneto's dead. Some Baseball friends. "ya dumb cluck!" WARLOCK! DOUG! A GREEN CAT ALIEN! LILA CHENEY! A Vrakanin, duh! Stealing a planet? A red-headed pervert Iggy Pop. 

Timestamps

0:00 - Hellos

21:30 - Pat's Email Corner

26:30 - Do anything X-Men related?

34:10 - New Mutants #18 - DEATH-HUNT

49:20 - New Mutants #19 - SIEGE

1:09:30 - New Mutants #20 - Badlands

1:29:20 - New Mutants #21 - Slumber Party!

1:53:05 - New Mutants Annual #1 - The Cosmic Cannonball Caper

2:09:30 - Final thoughts

2:10:35 - Pat's Steals n' Deals

2:14:45 - Goodbyes



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53 - New Mutants #18-21, Annual #1 - Demon Bear Saga

We're finally back to the regular ol' X-Men, and boy oh boy folks, did our patience ever pay off! Join us as we tackle some truly top-tier X-Men issues and start setting things back on course in the Marvel Universe. Plus, two (count em! two!) appearances from Contessa Valentina Allegra de Fontaine! Tune in!

Topics Discussed:

Professor X fanfic. Pilk. Basketball and improv. Is Astro Boy real? Sunfire! Wolverine steals a child. The giant green dragon metaphor. An answering machine. Rogue’s thinking accent. This is not your soup. Storm’s new bedroom. A tough breakup. An all-timer issue. Juggernaut! Selene! Forge is here! Handsome ass. A forbidden Family Guy reference. A fleet of balloon boys.

Timestamps:

0:00 - Saying Hi and Catching Up

10:30 - Pat’s Email Corner

30:30 - X-Men-Related Things We’ve Done

33:44 - Uncanny X-Men #181 : "Tokyo Story"

54:44 - Uncanny X-Men #182: "Madness"

1:13:06 - Uncanny X-Men #183: "He'll Never Make Me Cry"

1:36:47 - Uncanny X-Men #184: "The Past of Future Days"

1:50:30 - Uncanny X-Men Annual #7: "Scavenger Hunt"

2:07:21 - Pat’s Steals ‘n’ Deals



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52 - Uncanny X-Men #181-184 & Annual #7 - Consequences!

Here it is, folks. The Big One. The Event to End* All Events (*start). It's the Toy Company-mandated Jim Stupid-penned Super-Hero Epic SECRET WARS! And, of course, the X-Men are in it. Or something approximating the X-Men.

Matt and Pat struggle their way through this very long saga and have a lot more fun discussing it than reading it. 

Issues: Marvel Super-Heroes Secret Wars (1984) #1-12

Topics Discussed:

Professor X forgot. Galactus and the Wrecking Crew are equals. YOU'RE BEING MEAN TO DOOM. "Ach Nein Zein!" All the good guys fight all the bad guys. The planet's mysterious energies fix Jim Stupid's errors. Spider-Man's gonna rat on ya! The Weight of a Mountain. Everyone's worse than Hitler. The Size of a Solar System. Reed flailing! The chicken feather incident. Dazzler's murder of Klaw. Xavier's power is a joke. "SHUT UP, CYCLOPS!" The New Spider-Woman is here now... The Wasp is DEFINITELY dead. Thing has a good burn. Enchantress just complaining. An arrow hits harder than a bullet. The Wasp was NOT dead, she was just in some death-like stasis. Fightin' Doink-Its. Chippies. The funniest page turn reveal in history!

Timestamps:

1:00 - History of Secret Wars

22:40 - Pat's Email Corner

35:15 - Weapon Jason's recap of Marvel Super-Heroes coming into Secret Wars 

42:00 - Did we do anything Secret?

45:15 - Secret Wars Issue #1

 57:23- Secret Wars Issue #2

1:05:25 - Secret Wars Issue #3

1:12:25 - Secret Wars Issue #4 

1:23:30 - Secret Wars Issue #5

1:30:41 - Secret Wars Issue #6

1:42:25 - CHECK IN

1:46:27 - Secret Wars Issue #7

1:55:00 - Secret Wars Issue #8

2:02:57 - Secret Wars Issue #9

2:08:46 - Secret Wars Issue #10

2:16:52 - Secret Wars Issue #11

2:29:50 - Secret Wars Issue #12

2:44:55 - Pat's Steals and Deals!

2:49:23 - Ending

2:53:54 - SECRET JOKE



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51 - Secret Wars

Comedians Matt Aukamp (Save Your Game, The Very Worst) and Pat Reber (The Very Worst) read the X-Men in chronological order and talk about all the weird, funny, ridiculous, insightful, and interesting things within.

Mutant Menace