Bill Sienkiewicz arrives on the New Mutants to deliver us the absolutely fantastic Demon Bear Saga and the super fun arrival of Warlock and Doug to the book! It's so much fun, we had to bring along a guest to enjoy it with us. 

So Matt and Pat welcome Stephen Hesson from the Batting Around podcast to dive into it with us. We talk about X-Men: Evolution, Baseball, Marvel Movies, and then rave about Sienkiewicz's art for two hours.

TOPICS DISCUSSED:

BILL SIENKIEWICZ! A panel-breaking bear. Raving about the art so much. Cannonball with a shotgun. Trust us, this man is white. Who is this nurse with the chest hair? "I ain't worried about the Hulk, Bobby." Claremont's fetishization of Indigenous cultures. MEANWHILE, ACROSS THE GALAXY. Lilandra still dawdling. WOLFMAN! SHOOT IT! More raving about the art. Sam the religious himbo. Another Rahne Sinclair head injury. A really uncomfortable race-swap. Lonestar -> Moonstar? "TO: Dr. Strange RE: Demon Bear." Healer the Healer. "Drip Face" Whoops, by the way, Magneto's dead. Some Baseball friends. "ya dumb cluck!" WARLOCK! DOUG! A GREEN CAT ALIEN! LILA CHENEY! A Vrakanin, duh! Stealing a planet? A red-headed pervert Iggy Pop. 

Timestamps

0:00 - Hellos

21:30 - Pat's Email Corner

26:30 - Do anything X-Men related?

34:10 - New Mutants #18 - DEATH-HUNT

49:20 - New Mutants #19 - SIEGE

1:09:30 - New Mutants #20 - Badlands

1:29:20 - New Mutants #21 - Slumber Party!

1:53:05 - New Mutants Annual #1 - The Cosmic Cannonball Caper

2:09:30 - Final thoughts

2:10:35 - Pat's Steals n' Deals

2:14:45 - Goodbyes



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Episode 53 - New Mutants #18-21, Annual #1 - Demon Bear Saga

We're finally back to the regular ol' X-Men, and boy oh boy folks, did our patience ever pay off! Join us as we tackle some truly top-tier X-Men issues and start setting things back on course in the Marvel Universe. Plus, two (count em! two!) appearances from Contessa Valentina Allegra de Fontaine! Tune in!

Topics Discussed:

Professor X fanfic. Pilk. Basketball and improv. Is Astro Boy real? Sunfire! Wolverine steals a child. The giant green dragon metaphor. An answering machine. Rogue’s thinking accent. This is not your soup. Storm’s new bedroom. A tough breakup. An all-timer issue. Juggernaut! Selene! Forge is here! Handsome ass. A forbidden Family Guy reference. A fleet of balloon boys.

Timestamps:

0:00 - Saying Hi and Catching Up

10:30 - Pat’s Email Corner

30:30 - X-Men-Related Things We’ve Done

33:44 - Uncanny X-Men #181 : "Tokyo Story"

54:44 - Uncanny X-Men #182: "Madness"

1:13:06 - Uncanny X-Men #183: "He'll Never Make Me Cry"

1:36:47 - Uncanny X-Men #184: "The Past of Future Days"

1:50:30 - Uncanny X-Men Annual #7: "Scavenger Hunt"

2:07:21 - Pat’s Steals ‘n’ Deals



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52 - Uncanny X-Men #181-184 & Annual #7 - Consequences!

Here it is, folks. The Big One. The Event to End* All Events (*start). It's the Toy Company-mandated Jim Stupid-penned Super-Hero Epic SECRET WARS! And, of course, the X-Men are in it. Or something approximating the X-Men.

Matt and Pat struggle their way through this very long saga and have a lot more fun discussing it than reading it. 

Issues: Marvel Super-Heroes Secret Wars (1984) #1-12

Topics Discussed:

Professor X forgot. Galactus and the Wrecking Crew are equals. YOU'RE BEING MEAN TO DOOM. "Ach Nein Zein!" All the good guys fight all the bad guys. The planet's mysterious energies fix Jim Stupid's errors. Spider-Man's gonna rat on ya! The Weight of a Mountain. Everyone's worse than Hitler. The Size of a Solar System. Reed flailing! The chicken feather incident. Dazzler's murder of Klaw. Xavier's power is a joke. "SHUT UP, CYCLOPS!" The New Spider-Woman is here now... The Wasp is DEFINITELY dead. Thing has a good burn. Enchantress just complaining. An arrow hits harder than a bullet. The Wasp was NOT dead, she was just in some death-like stasis. Fightin' Doink-Its. Chippies. The funniest page turn reveal in history!

Timestamps:

1:00 - History of Secret Wars

22:40 - Pat's Email Corner

35:15 - Weapon Jason's recap of Marvel Super-Heroes coming into Secret Wars 

42:00 - Did we do anything Secret?

45:15 - Secret Wars Issue #1

 57:23- Secret Wars Issue #2

1:05:25 - Secret Wars Issue #3

1:12:25 - Secret Wars Issue #4 

1:23:30 - Secret Wars Issue #5

1:30:41 - Secret Wars Issue #6

1:42:25 - CHECK IN

1:46:27 - Secret Wars Issue #7

1:55:00 - Secret Wars Issue #8

2:02:57 - Secret Wars Issue #9

2:08:46 - Secret Wars Issue #10

2:16:52 - Secret Wars Issue #11

2:29:50 - Secret Wars Issue #12

2:44:55 - Pat's Steals and Deals!

2:49:23 - Ending

2:53:54 - SECRET JOKE



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51 - Secret Wars

Oh boy, folks - good episode, bad subject matter! The X-Men visit the Microverse, the Micronauts visit the Macroverse, and Kitty gets punched square in the face! Join us as we tackle what might be the worst run of X-comics so far, and as we spit on the graves of the Micronauts!

***CONTENT WARNING*** for discussion of sexual abuse, manipulation, and grooming from 1:25:00-1:30:00

Topics Discussed:

These are not good comics. Soft canon. Bill Mantlo’s Christmas miracle! Pilk, blood, and lava. Strange Maine. What the hell is happening in the Microverse, and do we care? The Micronauts are here! We’ve got Starjammers at home. Spellbinder. They’re actually toys. Smoking Wolverine. Have you ever been stabbed by a thumbtack? Rocket-powered centaur. Kitty commands a war. Some really gross stuff. We’re pretty upset by the whole thing. Get girlfriends.

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50 - X-Men and the Micronauts

ALPHA FLIGHT IS BACK! And we get a bunch of solo adventures until the team comes together and IMMEDIATELY comes apart. This is a wild ride, folks. Join Matt and Pat on a trip to Canada with our favorite incredibly bad super-hero team.

Topics Discussed:

DEADLY EARNEST. Homosexual implications. "Why are you mushing my face?" The smartest man in the mall. Bashing through a window... sneakily. NEMESIS has a cool costume. Cutting between molecules. Blowing our minds back and forth. We keep forgetting about some Yanchus. Mike T.V. Detective Walter Langkowski. A physics-defying mustache. Blood Battle! Captain America's super super-hero sense. Super Skrull's Super Cancer. The Canadian Dance. OMEGA FLIGHT!! The rudest way to pick someone up from the airport. A long tangent on TV shows from 1966-67. Flashback sucks. ...And One Shall Surely Die. A taxonomy of super-hero teams.

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49 - Alpha Flight #7-12

What if there was another school for mutants? Well, there is! You'd know if you've been paying attention. But we're not holding that against you - instead, we're diving deep into what's going on at the Massachusetts Academy, and the weird team of fighting mutants that they've put together. Plus, more Doug Ramsey! Tune in!

Topics Discussed:

30 minutes of emails. More about Pilk. Jeremy Bear and Jeremy Succession. Brute forcing a brain. Trying to draw a dog. Fuck on the switch. Stevie Hunter is a hero! Doug is a creep. Xavier shooting hoops. Kitty is being a real ding. Doug is NOT a creep we love him! Rusher Street Rebels. The X-Men disappear (ugh). I don't think that's how Jesus works. Compu-scan. The Hellions are here! This kid can't get enough Magnum P.I. Everyone forgot about Doug.

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48 - New Mutants #14-17, Uncanny X-Men #180 - Hellions

This week, we're not hanging out with the X-Men, we're hanging out in Hell with a little girl! Colossus's little sister, to be clear. Illyana Nikolievna Rasputin, who spent an entire 7 years of her life in Limbo, consort to a Demon-Lord, surrounded by dead or corrupted versions of the X-Men we know. The time has come to learn what happened between those 2 panels in X-Men #160 in the MAGIK: STORM AND ILLYANA mini-series!

Topics Discussed:

The Bloodstone Amulet. BELASCO ONLY HAS ONE ARM!? Cat's wild costume. "This was stressful, I must get nude now." Black... crystals? If you're good enough at meditating, you don't have to go to the bathroom. S'ym sucks! A Savage Land Diorama. The blood argument again. The "GET UP!" trope. A Brief Discussion of Time. Pat's least favorite X-Men villain. The Mystery of Wolverine's Nipples. SQUIDGE! Illyana's mutant power?? The Darkchild. So many funny little demon guys! Pat made Matt say "titillates." How do bloodstones work again? Lil' face scratches. A dead tree. S'    ym.


Cozendagen: https://lancasteronline.com/opinion/columnists/it-s-time-for-lancaster-county-to-launch-a-new-winter-holiday-cozendagen-column/article_6d50fcc4-1d13-4666-b2a4-e7fa74dda7a7.html

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47 - Magik - Storm and Illyana #1-4

Issues: Uncanny X-Men #177-179,  Moon Knight #35, & Marvel Fanfare #24

Happy February, folks! Bundle up with us as we dive back into the X-Men and the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants...gets away with it? We worry as every X-Man seems to die more than once, and Kitty marries a Morlock?! Oh yeah, and we swing by Moon Knight, the ballet, and the Avengers Mansion, too. 

Topics discussed:

A lot of emails. More milk discussion. Wonder Man. A dog named Psylocke. Ken Griffey Jr. and Sr. All of the X-Men are dead. Carnival vs. Circus. Kitty's problems. Fire can't DO that! White hot to absolute zero. Seems pretty hopeless, honestly! Who took this picture?? The Baxter Building. Probable fatality. Morlock wedding. Leech is here! Fully metal man. The Fly. Dancing for your life. Moon Knight at the ballet. The floating Marvel Universe poker game! Carol tells an inappropriate joke.

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46 - Uncanny X-Men #177-179 - Brotherhood Triumphant!

For an issue this big, and a crossover this wild, our ONLY option was to bring in a guest who is nerdier (and cooler) than us: Ernie, the BLERD WITHOUT FEAR. We have a goddamn blast discussing the weirdness that is The Uncanny X-Men and the New Teen Titans!

Darkseid and Dark Phoenix? What's next, Dark Seidnix?

Topics Discussed:

"You only love me for my psi-con wave." Spatial Geometry Brain. Kitty makes dinner... or does she? WWWWWWWWWWW! Darkseid does cat-burglar shit. A weird one for Starfire. GARF. Kid Flash disassembles an engine. "Hey do you have any disbelief?" VA-VA-VOOM. Inhuman faces in Gotham. Bunkie. The Phoenix. The Teen Wonder? RAVARK THE RAVAGER! Murder-hungry Starfire vs Sleepy Xavier. Teen Titans Leeroy Jenkins'ing the X-Mansion. A familiar, remote Butte. A bright green parademon. Darkseid is Santa Claus. The X-Titans. Just blast 'im in the eyes.

Blerd Without Fear on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@BlerdWithoutFear



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BONUS - X-Men & Teen Titans w/ the Blerd Without Fear 

It's a New Mutants episode! We start with a pretty wild email segment and an even more wild Pat's Steals and Deals, but in the middle we meet Magma, Selene, and Doug Ramsey when the New Mutants visit an ancient Roman city in the middle of the Amazon, and then head back home to spill soda on each other.

Topics Discussed:

White People Wakanda. Amara Juliana Olivia Aquila. The New Mutants unconscious... again... Meanwhile, a bunch of nude men! SELENE! "'tis nah proper!" Kids rely on experience, not conviction. Bobby's growin' up! Incredible pervert faces. "Am I dreaming?" RIP Amara. Selene has too many powers. Sal Buscema missed the memo on Columns. MAGMA. Selene has every power. RIP Amara again. Gallio has goo-blood. Stop changing Dani's outfit. A hollow, underground mountain!?? "She's probably unkillable." A cool chair turnaround. "Wee Slip of a Girl". A wolf sneezing. Destroying a poor family's home. Daysze. Does Professor X respect the privacy of peoples' thoughts? DOUG RAMSEY! An interlude? GROAT CHIPS. REAL CHEAP! REAL BAD! Amara's cryin' rock.

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45 - New Mutants #9-13 - Nova Roma

Comedians Matt Aukamp (Save Your Game, The Very Worst) and Pat Reber (The Very Worst) read the X-Men in chronological order and talk about all the weird, funny, ridiculous, insightful, and interesting things within.

Matt Aukamp

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