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The Late Edition: Conspiranews for November 2019
24 Plays5 years ago
It's the monthly news conspiracy theory news update, and it's only a week late! This week Josh and M discuss a potential cover-up of a Russian election hack... in the UK! There's also some updates about that whole Jeffrey Epstein thing. A lack of resolution in the Cuban Sonic Weapon attacks is mused. We also discuss 1080 and, of course, the continuing adventures of a President called "Trump."
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Transcript
Hypnosis session gone wrong
00:00:00
Speaker
All right, Dr. Denteth, I want you to close your eyes and listen only to the sound of my voice. You are getting sleepy. You feel yourself slowly sinking into the chair. Wait, sorry, is this some kind of ASMR sex thing? No, it isn't. That's a shame. Yes. Now, concentrate on my voice. You are going back.
00:00:25
Speaker
Back now. You are safe and relaxed. Tell me where you are. It's November of... It's November 2014. It's the launch of my... It's the launch of my first book.
00:00:42
Speaker
It's our live episode. Oh, good times. Good times.
JFK conspiracies revisited
00:00:48
Speaker
Oh, but now we're talking about JFK for the first time, and we're discussing occasions where conspiracy theorists got it right by accident. Very good. Now, sleep. You're moving forward through time. It is now November 2015. What do you see?
00:01:07
Speaker
I see. True? He's a guest on the podcast and we're discussing his views of a segment we called... No, no, I've lost it. Now we're talking about the terror attacks in Paris and the false flag attacks that came up around them, because of course they did.
00:01:30
Speaker
And now we're talking about JFK again, but this time there's someone else. Is that the ghost of Bertrand Russell? Is it what Bertrand Russell thought about the subject? Interesting. Very interesting. All right. I want you to relax once more. Move forward again. You can probably skip November 2016, since the only thing we did then was a special on the US presidential election. Let's go to November 2017. Can you see yourself there?
00:02:00
Speaker
Yes. Yes, I can. No, wait, no. Something's wrong. We're talking about JFK again. Well, he was killed in November, so he usually had a reason to mention him around that time, the concentrate. Oh, yes. Yes, yes. No, no, you're right. This time we're talking about the JFK Document Dump and what it showed. I'm moving on.
00:02:23
Speaker
Now we're discussing the Paradise Papers and now more false flag theories. The USS Liberty Incident and the Kaiten massacre, I think. Very good. We're nearly there now. One more year forward to November 2018. Are you there, Dr. Dentist? Yes. Yes, yes, yes I am. There's
00:02:47
Speaker
There's no JFK. Instead we're talking about the death of John Paul I.
JFK Document Dump and other revelations
00:02:55
Speaker
Now we're reviewing things. Strange and terrible things. A book. It's called Morningstar's Tale. And another. Ethical human rights. These ethical human rights. Awful.
00:03:12
Speaker
and I'm interviewing Pat Stokes. Oh, oh, that's much better. And now we're discussing World War I and the stab in the back myth that followed it. Wonderful, you've done very well now. It's time to return to the present. When I snap my fingers, you will be back in 2019, calm and relaxed and ready to record this week's episode. You will be at peace with the fact that the episode is a week late and it's all my fault.
00:03:42
Speaker
you will only feel love and contentment and you will cluck like a chicken. Ooh, ooh, I feel completely refreshed. Let's get on with the episode then. It's November 2019 and this is The Conspira. Cluck! Classic.
00:04:09
Speaker
The Podcaster's Guide to the Conspiracy, brought to you today by Josh Addison and Dr. M. Denton.
Podcast logistics and holiday plans
00:04:19
Speaker
Hello and welcome to the podcaster's guide to the conspiracy. I am Josh Edison. As always, Dr. Indentith this time, that seems a little low class compared to your decanter. I've just had three very good specialty gin and tonic. So I feel the need to water down the quality with Boundary Road. Which is a decent supermarket bear. Not that you wouldn't know. Well, no, my wife likes it.
00:04:45
Speaker
So I know second hand. Your wife likes a lot of things and also she's your common law partner. Well, we'll be speaking about laws common and otherwise in the bonus section but not in this section because we're doing the news episode and yes it is a week late.
00:05:00
Speaker
I wasn't able to record last week. And so that is nominally the news episode for November is now going out in December. Although given that we'll probably have to finish December early because of all the Christmas business, we probably won't have a December news episode. So maybe we can call this the November slash December one and come back. Nothing interesting happens in December anyway. No, who knows?
00:05:22
Speaker
Yes, so it'll be new, it'll be a catch-up, it'll be things we've talked about behind your backs with our favourite people, the patrons.
James Bond and Daniel Craig's exit
00:05:29
Speaker
It's true, we talk about you behind your backs all the time. The patrons know so much about you. Frankly, I'd be worried. But speaking of patrons, I understand we have a new one. Yes, the mysterious N. N? Almost as if they're trying to be my successor. Trying to one-up you, yeah.
00:05:47
Speaker
M comes after M. Maybe they think they'll be the next James Bond. Have you seen the trailer for No Time To Die? A.K.A. Daniel Craig has a paycheck? No, I've seen the posters, but not the trailer.
00:06:01
Speaker
For some reason, people seem very excited about this James Bond trailer. I watched it going, Daniel Craig really, really wants out, and he's really, really angry about it. I mean, admittedly, it means he's expressing emotion for the first time in James Bond's career. It's basically Casino Royale. But the expression is anger, and the anger is, I need to escape what's happening in this film. Yes, he hasn't been fairly upfront about the fact that he'd like out.
00:06:27
Speaker
And yet he keeps on taking paychecks to do more. Those are forcing him to do more James Bond films. They keep on saying, well, we'll offer you money if you'll do the next one. He goes, I don't really want it at all.
00:06:40
Speaker
It's quite big. Maybe I'll do one more but I'm not going to enjoy it. Anyway we're not here to talk about James Bond although we could. I mean we actually could for the whole conspiracy theory angle. Well there's lots of conspiracy theories in Bond yeah but that's not in the script for this week. The script involved you clacking like a chicken which you did very well I thought.
00:07:02
Speaker
But no, now the rest of the script is news and updates to previous news stories, so we'd better fire into them. Indeed, let's play The News Sting. Breaking breaking conspiracy theories in the news.
00:07:20
Speaker
So where do we begin? We begin in the UK or Russia? Somewhere in between. I mean basically the same thing these days. Everywhere is Russia as we're finding out with modern day political economies.
Russian Brexit interference and report suppression
00:07:32
Speaker
So yes, there's been a bit of a story over the last month about a potential hack of an election.
00:07:39
Speaker
not in the US, but by the Russians in the UK. Josh, what's been happening in the UK that's got people so worried about Ruskies under the bed? Well, so there's been this report that we think talks about how Russia interfered in the Brexit referendum. It was written by the Intelligence and Security Committee of the British Parliament. We say we think it contains that because it hasn't been released.
00:08:05
Speaker
No, and hasn't been released in a very, very suspicious way. So people are thinking that possibly it's going to show that Russia interfered in the campaign and maybe boosted the leave campaign. And given that a general election is on the way, that would probably... Which is all about
00:08:23
Speaker
which is all about Brexit. So that's going to be a bad look for the Tories if it turned out that Russia was meddling and helping their side. So it all seems like they're trying to stop this thing from coming to ear so that it doesn't hurt their re-election chances.
00:08:38
Speaker
Yeah, so this is a case of a committee of the British Parliament looking into potential election espionage or hacking by Russians with respect to the Brexit referendum. The report was completed and submitted to Downing Street for general release. It was expected that the report would be released before Parliament broke up before the election.
00:09:03
Speaker
And then Downing Street didn't do anything about it. And then when pressed about it, indicated that actually we will be releasing the report after the election, which is basically all about Brexit that the report deals with.
00:09:20
Speaker
And people are going, this looks a little bit like a sneaky trick. It certainly does. And it's got people talking. It's got Hillary Clinton talking for some reason. I don't really know that she has anything to do with it. I think basically as soon as Russia and election hacking comes up, Clinton is the first person you talk to. Yes, probably. And also Marina Litvinenko, that's the wife.
00:09:40
Speaker
Indeed, the wife of Alexander Litvinenko is the famous Russian expat killed by a polonium poisoning, probably on the behest of the Kremlin, although the Kremlin denies this fact, and she wants to basically sue the Prime Minister to get the report released, but her suing the Prime Minister is conditional on getting funding through a crowdfunding campaign.
00:10:04
Speaker
And I haven't seen any update as to whether that eventuated, but basically the election is in a week's time. So this is going to basically be old news very, very soon. Yes, so it seems the Tories really just need to run out the clock on this and they seem to have almost succeeded.
00:10:24
Speaker
So moving on to something a bit more cheery, Jeffrey Epstein. Oh, that's not cheery at all. It involves sex slavery and suicide slash murder. So we haven't really talked about the Prince Andrew thing, have we? No, no, it hasn't come up at all. But yeah, you all know Prince Andrew has been tied
Prince Andrew's Epstein interview fallout
00:10:43
Speaker
to Epstein. It's well documented that he was buddies with him. And then he gave that interview, which I think he thought
00:10:49
Speaker
would work to his advantage. As did his daughters, who were the people who actually organised the interview. So initially when the interview went out, the standard story was that Buckingham Palace, i.e. the Queen, had approved of the interview. And then it turned out, after the interview went out, that the Queen was unaware of exactly what was going on, and it was in fact Prince Andrew's daughters, the princesses, Beatrice and the other one. Yes, there we go.
00:11:19
Speaker
having organized it and apparently one of them now just cries constantly because she's realized what she's done. Yeah. So yes Prince Anne, Andrew gives an interview claiming to not know what Epstein was up to having never met the complainant in question which is Virginia Dufres I think it is. Thank you.
00:11:40
Speaker
which has kind of gone pear-shaped because of the photo of Andrew and Virginia in one location. Emails having been released which indicate that Gislaine Maxwell was contacting Andrew in 2015 about giving information about Virginia and all sorts of other ancillary information which indicates that maybe Prince Andrew is in fact a lying dunderhead.
00:12:05
Speaker
Well, yeah, I mean, there seem to be a fair amount of implausibility in the way he accounted for things. I mean, trying to say that the photo of the two of them standing together is doctored and her claims that he sweat a lot proves she's lying because he lost the ability to sweat in the Falklands War. That's not a lie. That's what he said. That's what he said. Despite the fact that most doctors say that the kind of condition he describes, which is a PTSD condition, actually makes you more liable to sweat, not to
00:12:35
Speaker
to stop sweating entirely. And then there was the fact that he was able to specifically recall his whereabouts on one particular date many years ago. Pizza Express and working. Now, admittedly, I have to say, if I were a member of the royal family, I'd probably remember going to a pizza chain restaurant. That's one of those things that would be for a royal. Oh, this is how plebs eat. Do I eat the pizza with my fingers? Oh my God, this is amazing.
00:13:03
Speaker
But yeah, so it all appears to have backfired on Andrew. He's retired, hasn't he? Or been forced to resign. Actually, did you hear about the Trump connection?
00:13:17
Speaker
Ah, the fact that Trump claimed... To not meet Prince Andrew all know him particularly well, despite the fact there are numerous photos of him with Prince Andrew at Jeffrey Epstein's manner. Yes, yes. In fact, someone even managed to find a photograph that had... It's got two of them at Trump and one of the others in the foreground, and then very obviously the other one in the background. I can't remember if it's Andrew in the front and Epstein in the back, but yes, they've managed to get plenty of photos of Trump with Andrew, plenty of photos with all of them and Epstein. Yes.
00:13:47
Speaker
Just a little bit wonky. It is. Just ever so slightly weird. But that hasn't been the only Epstein
Media's handling of Epstein story
00:13:52
Speaker
yet. No. So over the course of the last month, we discovered that there was a story with ABC anchor Amy Robach,
00:14:03
Speaker
where she basically, in between shooting segments on an ABC news show, was complaining to a producer about how they wouldn't air a show about the Jeffrey Epstein allegations, which then went in a rather weird direction, didn't it? Yeah, so she said she'd... this was what, 2013?
00:14:24
Speaker
I think. Yeah, it was. So she'd had this story years ago, she'd had a source, she'd interviewed, she was all ready to go with the story about Jeffrey Epstein and the network next to it. And so she was complaining about this in between takes, but the camera was still rolling, it was still recorded. Then last month, or a bit more than a month ago now, I guess, this video got leaked via Project Veritas and people... The James O'Keefe outfit that we've
00:14:51
Speaker
So initially it seemed slightly dodgy just because we tend not to trust anything the guy says but the video appeared to be legit and then there was a bit of stuff about how it apparently had been leaked by someone who worked at ABC at the time it had moved to CNN and then when it was found out this person had leaked ABC sort of said oh by the way CNN that person working for you just leaked material they shouldn't have and then the particular leaker got fired which
00:15:19
Speaker
I mean, it's kind of fair enough, I guess. Whistleblowers and all that sort of stuff. It seems a little bit dodgy, but on the other hand, if you are working for a private corporation, that's the sort of thing they would look down on quite strongly. So I don't know.
00:15:35
Speaker
However, on the did Jeffrey Epstein kill himself or was he murdered conspiracy theory angle? Two interesting tidbits. For one thing, two of the corrections officers who were involved in supervising Epstein are being charged with failing to do their jobs and then covering up their dereliction of juicing.
00:15:56
Speaker
But as with most of the stuff that's come out, it kind of works both ways. I mean, you know, that's consistent with them being paid off or whatever, or deliberately hiding the fact that he was murdered. It's also consistent with them just being a little bit incompetent in a poorly funded prison system and trying to cover up their incompetence by doctoring records after the fact.
00:16:19
Speaker
Yeah, although what was interesting was that Kathleen Hawk Sawyer, who's the new director of the Federal Bureau of Prisons, the previous one had to resign because of the whole Epstein fiasco, has said that FBI agents are looking at the possibility that a criminal enterprise played a role in Epstein's death.
00:16:41
Speaker
Which again, yeah, it shows they're looking into it. It doesn't, you know, if you believe Epstein was murdered, you jump on it and say, oh, look, even the authorities think he was murdered. Yeah, even the authorities know. If you don't think he's murdered, you might go, well, you know, the authorities have to tick every single box. So they're going to at least investigate the claim, even though we know it's nonsense.
Public opinion on Epstein's death
00:17:03
Speaker
There's also an interesting little story where there was a poll in the States that by... Who was it? It's not written down there. It was like Survey Monkey, wasn't it? Oh, yes, yes. Which I wondered if they were related to MailChimp. I don't think so. That was a joke we made in the Patreon episode. A survey of people in America basically saying, do you think Epstein was murdered? And the number one response was yes. Followed by, I don't know, followed by, no, he committed suicide.
00:17:30
Speaker
Which obviously doesn't prove anything, but it does show there was the previous study, the previous survey rather, had shown fewer people thinking that he had been murdered, so the number was rising. And apparently the belief that Epstein was murdered. I kept doing the Jepstein. That's how he's known on the street.
00:17:52
Speaker
I mean, George Epstein. Apparently, the belief that Epstein was murdered is quite a bipartisan belief that it was almost 50-50, whether you're Republican or Democrat, people who believed, obviously, your political affiliation probably affects who you think was behind the murder. Yeah. There's the old Clinton body counts coming out again. So, you know, people on the right will say, you know, he had dirt on Clinton. So Clinton had him killed. People on the left say he had dirt on Trump. So Trump had him killed.
00:18:21
Speaker
And Libertarians think that he was just killed by anyone. So yes, Epstein. Wacky fellow. Glad he's dead. Yes, I have to say. However, you know who's not dead? Fidel Castro. No, he is. I know the diplomat at the Cuban Embassy. I was leading you into an obvious segue. And you had to go straight to Castro. Well, I don't know. I see Cuba. I think Castro. See, I think April some.
00:18:49
Speaker
Ah, that too. But no, so there's sort of been, there's been more stuff that's come up with the idea that maybe they just plain wasn't an attack. Yeah, so this is a update on the whole Cuban sonic weapon thing, which we also talked about with respect to the US Embassy in Beijing, where they had a similar issue of diplomatic staff, both in Cuba and Beijing.
00:19:17
Speaker
Basically falling ill and suspecting it was a sonic weapon that was causing the nausea and other nondescript symptoms the diplomatic staff had suffered from. Now it turns out that The Guardian, the UK newspaper,
00:19:35
Speaker
use the FOIA, the Freedom of Information access system in the US, to find out exactly what the US government knew about the supposed attack upon the diplomats. And the answer is, not much. Not much, no. Lots of suspicion. Lots of suspicion, you know, was Cuba up to something? And then, oh, but if Cuba, if it wasn't Cuba, then who was it? Yeah, who was it?
00:20:01
Speaker
basically a whole lot of nothing. And indeed, there was a Cuban investigation as well into these attacks. And they also basically they came up with that it was there was nothing. There wasn't enough in common all the people who were reporting different things. There was nothing in common among them. And the only common factor that seemed to unite them all was having been told by their government that they had been the victim of some sort of attack.
00:20:27
Speaker
Yeah, so basically the Cuban investigation seems to go this is a mass delusion. People were falling ill normally at the embassy, but they were being told by their government they were under attack, which then made them think that their various different symptomologies must be related, leading to a kind of feedback effect where as soon as anyone fell ill,
00:20:54
Speaker
They were falling ill according to the attack as opposed to just falling ill. So it looks like this may have been a bit of a fuss about nothing. Yeah. Now, local news. You may recall a local
James Shaw's attack and legal aftermath
00:21:09
Speaker
politician. Hey, is he a politician anymore?
00:21:12
Speaker
He's still co-leader of the Greens in confidence and support. James Shaw is still co-leader of the Greens. Local politician James Shaw got punched in the face a while ago and this is conspiracy. Obviously it's news when an MP is assaulted on the street.
00:21:27
Speaker
It was conspiracy news because the guy had made some comment on UN migration pact and appeared to believe in it. So basically a conspiracy theory that the government of New Zealand, Aotearoa, had signed up to a UN agreement to basically make the country less white.
00:21:45
Speaker
And that sort of thing all gets very New World Order, Article 21-ish and so on and so forth. But the fella who did it went to court and is now going to prison, although apparently mostly he was given a prison sentence because he refused being electronically monitored. So the initial judgment was you can have home detention.
00:22:08
Speaker
But home detention requires an ankle bracelet. The person in question went, I don't want no ankle bracelet, which makes me think that maybe they're also scared of being monitored in general. So they're being put in prison instead. So this isn't the case of someone being forced into prison by a harsh sentence. It is someone who is choosing prison rather than electronic monitoring in home detention.
00:22:30
Speaker
But what's interesting was that despite the fact that when he was punching James Shaw repeatedly He was talking about migration Now he claims the reason why he punched the MP was because his wife had had a miscarriage and he was just He was he was he was stressed and and really worried about an abortion. Yep sign now abortion
00:22:53
Speaker
It's a tricky thing to talk about in our situation. Abortion is not the hot topic that it is in the US. It's not not a hot topic, but certainly nowhere to the extent. It's a widely misunderstood topic in our policy. I think it's fair to say most people think we have abortion on demand and we don't. Most people when they hear we don't have abortion on demand think we should have abortion on demand. So people who are
00:23:20
Speaker
very agitated about abortion, actually tend to be the pro-abortion camp rather than the pro-life camp. And this is a pro-lifer who was also, from the looks of it, someone who was very worried about immigration, but realizing that the immigration angle kind of makes them look bad and thinks that they can justify punching the MP by talking about their wife having a miscarriage instead.
00:23:47
Speaker
It is very weird, but it is basically the end of the story. James Short is fine. He's back in Parliament. He has not resigned. Josh, I'm not knowing. Who's the greener? Jack McDonald, who is the one who resigned because Russell Norman isn't left enough. Maybe that's the person whose name starts with a J. Maybe I just saw that story. Anyway, doesn't matter.
00:24:10
Speaker
We do have more local news, though. We're back on the 1080 thing. 1080, the local poison used to control local wildlife, which a lot of people aren't particularly fond of, but tend to come up with some spurious reasoning.
Environmental concerns in New Zealand
00:24:26
Speaker
Basically, a while back, a, well, actually, I suppose the full story is, a while back there was a quite concerted effort by anti-1080 groups in Aotearoa, New Zealand, to make 1080 look bad. So this started off with a whole bunch of Kia, one of our endangered native birds, did Kia being left on the steps of Parliament,
00:24:54
Speaker
The claim was these care had died by ingesting 1080. In theory, 1080 shouldn't be affecting bird populations. It's a mammalian poison rather than one which affects birds, although with the right dosage, a bird can die from 1080. But the standard wisdom for this is...
00:25:11
Speaker
That's very unlikely and a kind of acceptable loss given the benefit of getting rid of a million predators in the bush. It should be pointed out as a side note for people who know nothing about the fauna of Aotearoa New Zealand. We do not have native mammals outside of the bat.
00:25:31
Speaker
and dolphin, I suppose, but you don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in the bush. They don't need to live in
00:25:58
Speaker
which was a little bit dodgy, but we've talked about that before, but what's new are rats. Dead rats! Six hundred and eighty of them. Kind of what we want are dead rats, but with not dead rat in the location, the dead rats were found. Yes, so there are a whole bunch of rats washed up on Westport Beach.
00:26:15
Speaker
And the claim was that these rats had been killed by 1080 poison in a forest quite some distance away, and then had been washed down there from floodwaters. And it was like, well, if that's true, if they'd been killed by 1080, then this is a big deal, because that means 1080 is escaping from the areas where it's being dropped. It's supposed to be tightly controlled and so on. And animals which have been poisoned by 1080, the 1080 remains in their system, so it can be a problem if other animals eat the corpses of the... So it could be a deal.
00:26:45
Speaker
if poisoned animals were being washed far, far away. But it is somewhat continuous as to how these rats actually died. Yes. So this story starts with a mysterious lab report provided to Flora and Fauna of Aotearoa and Clean Green New Zealand, two separate groups. Now, both of whom are NT 1080. They are.
00:27:12
Speaker
And they released these findings to the media, and the findings clearly indicated that the rats had consumed 1080, and there was enough 1080 left in their systems that anyone who predated upon their corpses
00:27:31
Speaker
would also suffer from 1080 poisoning. So you're talking cats, dogs and other animals, basically pets within a residential area who would have had slow and agonising deaths. And they were going, this is evidence that we need to stop using 1080 and find some kind of more humane alternative.
00:27:56
Speaker
Story's not that clear, though, is it, Joshua? No. Well, so people said, so you've got this lab report. What lab did it come from? And they said, we're not going to tell you. No, we're not going to tell you who the lab is at all. We're just going to give you the result. We also have a pet scientist over here who will endorse those results. Did he? No. He said, I don't know what lab they came from. So until I do, I can't endorse those results. Sorry.
00:28:24
Speaker
And indeed other scientists who looked at the lab results where the procedure here seems ever so slightly unorthodox and also the science seems ever so slightly not scientific. So local website the spin-off has been reporting on this and their most recent one, their most recent story on it has been talking about
00:28:52
Speaker
Dr. Nick Wall, who's a chemist from Temeru, who has been involved in some questionable science in the past. He tested a lake bed for DDT poison, found what looked to be... We manufactured DDT in this country. Thanks, America. Looked, so found what appeared to be evidence that this lake, local lake, was being used as a toxic dump site, but then no one else could replicate his findings.
00:29:19
Speaker
He's also made other claims that he's made claims that have been failed to be substantiated and it was the suspicion was that he was behind this claim which has so far been unsubstantiated. Now he denies this. He denies it. He denies this quite strongly. And indeed threatens legal action. Yeah, of El Tiro says no, not involved. But I believe
00:29:41
Speaker
there are some unredacted results. Well, yes. So the lab result was supplied as a redacted PDF, but it was possible if you just do a select all copy and then paste it into a Word document, that gets rid of the redactions. And one of the things redacted was the name of the lab supervisor, or rather the initials of the lab supervisor, which are NW. Could be a coincidence. Could be. And indeed, according to Nick Wall, definitely is.
00:30:09
Speaker
So yes, I mean we have basically repeated something we've seen before a bunch of times. We have people claiming that 1080 is more dangerous than the government is willing to let on and yet the evidence they offer for that so far has been wanting. It has. So it's a rather interesting story and I suspect we'll probably have an update whenever we do the news again. Which will probably be sometime in January because of course there will be the standard
00:30:37
Speaker
end of year hiatus beginning of year rest of hiatus right okay so we're into trump we have the trump jingle let's jingle our way into trump land like this a few days ago i called the fake news the enemy of the people and they are
00:30:57
Speaker
Right, now I'm just going to look at the time here. I'm giving us 10 minutes. No more than 10 minutes to talk about Trump. There's a whole bunch of things we could say that I think we need to economize because there's just too much, quite frankly. Where do you want to start? Let's start with the impeachment. Well, that's the main thing. So you should point out, technically the public impeachment hearing is only just about to start.
00:31:21
Speaker
And there's been two documents released, one from the Democrats. Trump should be impeached, one from the Republicans. Everything Trump did was fine. It's okay, which does show that this is going to be a very partisan impeachment. But then again, haven't they all? Well, yes.
00:31:40
Speaker
So what have they been so far? Pre-impeachment hearings or something? I suppose you might call them in our system the evidentiary hearings. You're getting the evidence required to then level a charge.
00:31:55
Speaker
So, in these hearings, we've seen lots of people. It seems like every week there's been a new name for us to learn. There was Gordon Sondland, who was the ambassador to the European Union. So, he gave his evidence and eventually recalled a conversation that... Eventually recalled.
00:32:17
Speaker
So there's a very nice clip online where Sondland is complaining about the lip he's getting from one of the people in the evidential hearings and the politician in question goes here, just let me point out to you right now.
00:32:32
Speaker
This is the third time you've been in front of us. And yes, it's great you're telling us the truth now, but it's taking you an awful long time to get it with a lot of clarifications after previous hearings. So don't complain about me pressuring you about these things. You've actually not been very forthcoming in the past.
Trump's impeachment and health rumors
00:32:55
Speaker
So yes, he now recalls a conversation with a top adviser to the Ukrainian president in which Sondland himself said, so he recalled, he managed to recall a thing that he himself said, the resumption of... Brilliant memory of this man. This is why Trump appoints these people, they're the best people, best memories.
00:33:11
Speaker
The resumption of the USAID would likely not occur until Ukraine provided the public anti-corruption statement that we had been discussing for many weeks. So again, it's sort of evidence for the whole sort of the quid pro quo thing that we're trying to establish. Now, how did Trump take this testimony? Quite well, as I recall, very happy with it. Just relaxed and as usual, usual chilled out self.
00:33:33
Speaker
See that's not true, he had a really big notepad with sharpie related notes and basically the best thing that came out of it was someone singing the notepad in the style of Morrissey. Now I don't like Morrissey, he's an awful human being and an even worse vegan.
00:33:58
Speaker
But things in the style of Morrissey are hilarious, and I'll support those. Yes, was it Pat Noswalt who got it ball rolling? He was the one I saw retweeting these things, I think he might have been the first person to say. He certainly helped popularise it, but I'm not entirely sure of the cosmology. It was very good.
00:34:14
Speaker
So we had Sondland, we had Lieutenant Colonel Alexander Vindman who testified against Trump and then immediately started getting sort of smeared all over the place. Now Vindman is a double agent. Either Ukrainian national or descended from Ukrainian national.
00:34:30
Speaker
Purple Heart in the US military was listening in on the call as a Ukrainian expert and he was going, you know, the transcript that you heard is not quite what happened. That's the best version of the event. What really happened is a lot worse. The retaliation for Vinman testifying was losing his seat on the National Security Council.
00:34:56
Speaker
And lots of people on Fox News trying to insinuate that he's some sort of Ukrainian double agent and his true loyalties lie there, which then had some people saying, yeah.
00:35:04
Speaker
He's a war veteran with a purple heart. I thought we weren't supposed to attack those guys. In the old days, you didn't. Now, talking about attacking people, hospital. That's when people go when they're being attacked. Why was Trump in hospital? Ah, right. Yeah, because something that isn't actually anything to do with impeachment. Lovely. Yes, no. So Trump, as you've heard, as you probably heard, had a mysterious visit to hospital. It was... Unexpected? Unplanned. Unexpected. It was unannounced.
00:35:32
Speaker
supposedly Melania only found out about it afterwards. And so the official version was his annual physical, which isn't due until sometime next year, they were just sort of getting in a bit early, just doing some of the usual tests ahead of it so that they didn't have to do them when it's properly
00:35:51
Speaker
Now, this is not how medicals work. Generally not. You don't tend to do part of your medical on one day and then the other part a month later because the whole point about a medical is working out your state of health at one particular point in time. But like saying, well, do the medical on my right arm today and my right arm in three weeks time. That doesn't work.
00:36:15
Speaker
Yeah, so immediately there were a variety of conspiracy theories around what might have happened. Some people said, you know, this shows Trump is seriously ill and they're trying to hide it. Some people said this is laying the groundwork for should the impeachment all go unfavourably towards Trump for him to resign due to medical reasons? Some, you know, there's them saying, you know, look, see, look, he was already, the signs were already showing before. Is he not retiring because of impeachment? It's because he's not, he's not well.
00:36:45
Speaker
Yes, so basically you show that he's been going to the doctor for a while now, as we saw back in November. And it's got to the point now where we have to go, he's probably not fit enough to continue being president. So we'll allow the vice president to take control. One.
00:37:04
Speaker
Pence. Mike Pence. Mike Pence, who will probably give former President Trump a pardon. And it's all going to be fine. Now, of course, these conspiracy theories are fairly baseless at the moment. There's also the the Info Wars version, which is that Trump's food taster, which apparently is a thing. Well, I understand it's not.
00:37:27
Speaker
It's not like in the court of the king. The chef who's in charge of the White House kitchen is also the person who tastes the food. So they are technically a food taster even though their primary job is actually being a cook. So supposedly his taster had taken ill and may have been poisoned and so Trump was rushed off to make sure that he hadn't been poisoned also. But then again I believe there's no evidence for that kind
00:37:49
Speaker
No, it's an unsubstantiated Infowars story based upon an anonymous source. And as we know about Infowars, they're not the most reliable people when it comes to any form of reporting. No, no. So all we know is that he had a medical appointment of some sort and none of the explanations as to exactly why he did that appear to be adding up at the moment.
00:38:15
Speaker
So, we have three minutes left by my count. What else do we have? Roger Stone.
Roger Stone's verdict and political drama
00:38:22
Speaker
We cannot avoid talking about the most dapper man in American politics, the penguin of the American Republican race, Roger Stone. Roger Stone, who no lies has a tattoo of Nixon on his back. Yes, that is not a lie. Richard Nixon's face is tattooed on his back.
00:38:42
Speaker
Why would you make that up, quite frankly? Why would you do it in the first place? I mean, there are so many questions here. So yes, he's been found guilty of being a liar. Yeah. And we are prosecuted and accused him of telling lawmakers five different lies related to WikiLeaks and Assange. So this is going back to more election interference stuff, not Ukraine stuff.
00:39:09
Speaker
And yeah, he's been sent down soon to be, well, possibly soon to be following him. We have old, Devin Nunes has gotten trouble. The noonster. The noonster. We talked about this in the page of things. This is a Rudy Giuliani thing. So two, actually three of Rudy Giuliani's compatriots into the investigation of the Ukraine.
00:39:37
Speaker
are under charge at the moment for collusion with Ukraine and the Trump campaign. One of them is this guy called Lev Parnas. Lev Parnas was sent to the Ukraine by Rudy Giuliani to investigate the whole Hunter Biden thing.
00:39:54
Speaker
Turns out that Devin Nunes or Nunes, because we've never been sure exactly how to pronounce his name, has been in contact a lot with Lev Parnas about the Ukrainian investigation. Devin is threatening to sue people who make claims he's associated with it, but the phone records are now out showing he's been in contact with him, including him calling Parnas, and not just Parnas calling him.
00:40:24
Speaker
which means that we now have a direct link between the Republican chair of the evidential hearings about Trump being in contact with the people doing the very bidding that's being investigated by this particular committee, which threatens to impeach Trump for that activity. So a massive conflict of interest if this is... Indeed!
00:40:50
Speaker
So not looking so great for the Devster. And even Giuliani himself, we saw over the past week or two, Trump sort of distancing himself a little bit from Giuliani. Leading to the most bizarre insurance claim of all time. Yes. So Trump was talking to Bill O'Reilly, I believe, and O'Reilly said, so did you send Giuliani to Ukraine to talk about this stuff? And Trump said, no, no, I didn't do it. I don't know why he went over there.
00:41:15
Speaker
He has a lot of clients, some in Ukraine, and definitely appeared to be trying to distance himself in the way that we've seen him distance himself from other people who've then ended up in jail or being found guilty of other things. And then, yes, Giuliani
00:41:32
Speaker
Basically said he has insurance, quote unquote, if he if he ends up going down and sort of implied that the insurance is dirt on the Bidens, which is odd because the whole thing is then being them trying to cook up dirt on the Bidens. And so surely if he had that, he would have released that by now and wouldn't be holding it. It didn't make a lot of sense.
00:41:53
Speaker
It made as much sense as his claim about active FBI agents investigating Hillary Clinton, where it turns out that Giuliani is now claiming that when he made that claim, he wasn't talking about agents who are active in the FBI.
00:42:12
Speaker
investigating Hillary Clinton. He was referring to ex-agents of the FBI who are retired who are still physically fit and thus are active agents of the FBI and really appreciate that it was a very confusing thing for him to say but when you actually explain it this way it makes complete sense. Perfect sense. As much sense as anything I think.
00:42:37
Speaker
Makes no sense at all. It's topsy-turvy times. Oh, look at that. Oh, we went two minutes over. Oh, well, that's okay. We've come to the end, I think. We have. That was the news update for November. Delivered, it's late. So there you go. And that's all the news you're getting out of us for this year.
00:42:56
Speaker
but plenty more chicken noises, as many as you can. Well, unless you're a patron, there's probably more news for you, although not this week, because as you may be aware, or maybe not, because you may have only discussed this in the patron episodes, when we do a news episode, we do a content episode for our patrons. And this week, we're talking about the exciting topic of Soviet sovereign citizens. Now we could explain what Soviet sovereign citizens are now, but
00:43:25
Speaker
We're not going to because we're saving it for our patrons. Now if you donate us a dollar a month you get the exciting topic and you get the exciting news updates between exciting topics. So for a dollar or more you can give us more a month you get exciting content and of course you get our love.
00:43:46
Speaker
The rest of you listeners, we definitely like all of our listeners. We don't love your listenership. But no, it's not the same. No, no. We love our patrons. I mean, we really love our patrons.
00:44:01
Speaker
I kind of wish we wouldn't sometimes, I think, but it's too late. Unfortunately, it's much too late. Fortunately, when you join, there's a contract and there are consequences. Bodily fluids, it's yup. Yup. Anyway, it's the end of this episode. We're going to go off and record a patron one. If you're a patron, you might go off and listen to that patron one once you're done listening to this episode. Otherwise, I guess we will see you next week. Any final comments slash clucking like a chicken? Well done.
00:44:33
Speaker
you
00:44:39
Speaker
You've been listening to the podcaster's guide to the conspiracy, starring Josh Addison and Dr. M.R. Extended, which is written, researched, recorded and produced by Josh and Em. You can support the podcast by becoming a patron, via its Podbean or Patreon campaigns. And if you need to get in contact with either Josh or Em, you can email them at podcastconspiracyatgmail.com or check their Twitter accounts, Mikey Fluids and Conspiracism.
00:45:40
Speaker
And remember, remember, oh December, what a night.