S6E18&19 - A Star is Burns & Lisa's Wedding

Transcript

Speaker: Hello? This is Mole Man in the morning. Good Mole Man to you. Hello and welcome to Mole Man in the Morning! Hans Molmann Productions presents...

Speaker: Mole Man in the morning. Very good. Yeah. Cool. I thought so. Professional outfit now. Cool. Is it just going to be that one from now on? Maybe, yeah. There's a whole studio backing us now. Hans Moorman Productions. I don't know. We start our Patreon and now we think we're somebody.

Speaker: yep that's bringing in a whole zero month Yeah. Hello and welcome to Mold Man in the Morning. We are a podcast about how The Simpsons has a lot to say about society. I am your host, John. And I'm joined as ever by my two.

Speaker: Medieval co -hosts matter. The metric system is the tool of the devil. My car gets 40 rods to the hog's head and that's the way I likes it. Excellent. And Michael. out the whole podcast arena Matt's remarks will be stricken from the record

Speaker: ah we'll have We'll have things to say about the metric system later, but we'll get to that. Right, yeah, where we are we at? We are into season 16. We're well into season 16. We're actually...

Speaker: Probably not. Do you mean season six? Thanks. we are season six yeah no my brain is my brain is not in a great place to die so if i'm if i'm a bit scatterbrained that's uh me no brain good um I'll have to fix it all in post. Who knows? Or not. Podcast no good.

Speaker: Me podcast no good. hmm That's impossible. Yeah, you guys are going to... prop up the show today I'm afraid sorry oh shit

Speaker: we're in season six not season 16 uh we're season six uh episodes 18 and 19 star is burns and lisa's wedding well at least you've watched the right episode considering how little burns is in I did. like is me's and It's strange that they used him.

Speaker: In the title, it's for them to say that he's just a minor driving force within the entire episode. episode Yes, yes, very much so. mm -hmm Yeah, that's a bit weird. But I guess they...

Speaker: they had They had some sort of reference slash pun they wanted to to go with. They should have gone with McBain. Let's get silly. McBain, let's get silly.

Speaker: ah Cool. ah Before we do any of those, we must talk about what we're drinking, though. So... What have you got, guys?

Speaker: I, as I am in the, uh, the, the colonies today. I thought I would get something relatively American. And also, I thought I would do it in an American way. So... what Americans do. is they create food abominations, so I have done the same.

Speaker: I got some Mr Boston. Uh, Golden Room. and mixed it with root beer. And... Pod it. Into my - Fucking... goblet I bought at the Ren Faire yesterday. So I'm about to sample that right now, and I'm probably going to die.

Speaker: That doesn't sound too adventurously out of there. I feel like that would work. It's rum and coke. It's just rum and coke, basically. but i thought I thought you were going to say I've got ah some gummy bears which I've blended with some chocolate digestive biscuits. under I do have some digestive. Dude, the the every time I come here, the thing that bothers me the most is when we go to um the supermarket.

Speaker: And go to like... The Foreign Section? For one. There's an English section in the foreign section, which is weird to me. And also that it's only one shelf, like one side of shelving. It's not like literally one shelf. You know what I mean? Like one panel of shelving.

Speaker: And I'm like, fucking, the Queenland deserves way more than this. But yeah, I buy Digestives and Yorkshire Tea while I'm there. I was going to say, what what do they have? But yeah, Yorkshire Tea, I guess, seems like the standard export.

Speaker: Tetle's. Is it just tea? It's just the tea section. it's It's just tea. Digestive biscuits, hobnobs. They come in boxes. The biscuits come in boxes. That's so strange. Do Americans not have hobnobs?

Speaker: No. They don't have more McVitie's products, I think. I'm so sorry, America. I know. They have Yorkshire puddings and fish and chips. Yes, you can buy... I think that... I don't think there's York's Puddings, but there's like...

Speaker: shepherd's pie mix That's great. Round threes. Fucking wine gums, shit like that. Oh, also Ambrosia. Rice pudding.

Speaker: And that makes me happy because I buy that. Peas, beans. do you know just typical shit but it's in the british section oh yeah but i guess i guess americans always think baked beans are weird so i could see that peas though no peas Mushy peas.

Speaker: Okay. Yeah. yeah One of those things is not like the other. Mm -hmm. There's all sorts there. It's great. There's, uh, the weirdest thing is, like, the chocolate. Like, they don't tend to have Cadbury's or anything like that, but they do have Aero.

Speaker: No. And that was crazy to me because like. We bought Aero last time I was here, and I gave some to Jill. and was like, try this. And she...

Speaker: She was, like, amazed at the whole, the you know, the bubbles melt on your tongue thing. Yeah. And I was like... That seems like it would be such a popular thing in America. Why isn't it done in America? And it's and she loves it and it's great. I love it.

Speaker: I love Arrow. Arrow mint chocolate. Fucking sick. Arrow's good. Yeah, I know. that's That's wild that that's... not made it beyond these shores beyond like niche yeah regional specialty sections i think if you think about it it's not that popular here any up here uh in england anymore like it used to get advert it used to have adverts now it doesn't I suppose so, yeah. Fair enough.

Speaker: The only adverts... The major chocolate adverts I still remember are the overtly sexual Galaxy. Adverts! Ah, that bunny. anyway welcome to more man in the morning a podcast about chocolate

Speaker: Sponsors please! Is it a Simpsons podcast if I don't derail it at least once? Well, no, no. no wait Please tell us about your drink though. Oh, it's delicious. Okay, good. I'm very glad.

Speaker: Is that because it's a very sugary rum mixed with a very sugary soft drink? And I do have a sweet tooth. So yes. Okay, cool. bill Noted. If people want to know what root beer it is, any listeners from America, it's Boylan.

Speaker: Don't know that one. No, it's they sell it at the local ah Bagel Place, which we went to today. And it's delicious, probably one of my favourite things i to buy while I'm here, but it's - I don't buy it too often because it's really sugary and I get a headache, so I'm - old now.

Speaker: Yeah. yeah I'm quite partial to root beer when i on my occasions I've been to America. I thought you were going to say you're quite partial to headache. Not now. No, not so much that one. No.

Speaker: ah Yeah. but yes you're right that a lot of them are very sugary so you need to get the right balance from those Michael, what you got? I have a peppermint tea and a can of tango. I am living the good life.

Speaker: Playing it safe, huh? Any Any jost. Now do I combine those two things together and... see what Do it. Yes. Do it. Do it. you know up i' Not feeling that brave. I've got to be up at work in the morning. I had 10 pikes yesterday. That's probably not a good thing.

Speaker: Jesus. Wait, what? Yeah, I was out yesterday. 10 points. Did that get away from me? Oh, yes. I thought you said you had 10 points today. I was like, oh, Jesus, ah you're not going to, like...

Speaker: be giving us your a game either then huh michael on 10 pints is like me on dragon soup i can confidently say i've never given my a game on this podcast

Speaker: but John, what are you drinking?

Speaker: I've got Fierce West Coast IPA. 6 .2 % It's Hoppy. It's pale. Is this tasty? Is this why you're not on your game? What? Because I'm drinking a beer. No, I normally drink a beer, Michael. 6 .2.

Speaker: Okay, so... um The options in my fridge were a 6 .2 pail. or 8 point something percent silly bullshit. well you have chosen i mean i would have gone for the silly bullshit i'm again not in the mood for the 8 % silly bullshit so we'll save that one for next episode probably good I'll hold you to that.

Speaker: Okay. Well, it's the latter is the last beer I bought for the podcast in my fridge, so it's going to have to be that one. I would have fought with, um... Silly. Silly concepts. This surely was the episode. but We'll get that.

Speaker: Uh, maybe, maybe. But again, it was more to do with my sort of mental state than anything. I was like, do I want to be drinking an 8 % on a Sunday night before work tomorrow when I'm not feeling top of the world? Uh, no. Let me go with a normal beer. Yeah, that's a recipe for a disaster. That's a brave choice. That's a recipe for bad habits.

Speaker: Mmm. Uh, uh... Yeah. Let's re -plug our Patreon. Michael alluded to it earlier. And we definitely didn't do as good a job of plugging it up front as we did could have done last time. And I feel like that's something that should be mentioned before we before we get going rather than after. So we do have a Patreon now.

Speaker: it is It is free, first and foremost. it is mostly a place to put all the audio episodes people have been asking for that a couple folks asked for either content to be on patreon because that's where they get their podcasts which is totally fair uh or just wanted audio only versions because all the podcast platforms make it

Speaker: force you to do video these days and... Blech. if you just want audio to put into an into a audio playing podcast app. You need an audio file and you don't need to be downloading fucking multiple gigabytes of video. So we do have a Patreon. It is free. It will have the audio versions of the episodes. Still getting through the backlog at time of recording.

Speaker: I'm hoping I might have the backlog up by the time I might get this edited out, but it's underway. It's a work in progress. There will be, yeah. archives of all the audio on there for anyone who wants them and because it is patreon you can give us money if you so choose it's very much kind of a tip jarry donation and kind of affair right now you do not get diddly squat but our thanks for donating, but...

Speaker: We will thank you for doing it. yeah we all got hell yeah We'll give a nice warm fuzzy feeling. He'll be buying Matt his root beer. He'll be buying Johnny's... Silly beers. you'll be buying me You'll be buying me my therapy.

Speaker: scar Yeah, all these things. Fund all those. if if three If three people... Donate £50 a month each. We will all go into therapy.

Speaker: And the podcast will go downhill. yeah what's up with all point yeah Shall we get on with it then? Yeah, with that out of the way, let us... talk about A Star Is Burns which aired on March 5th 1995

Speaker: What happened on that day? day. Well... it's interesting the way they've listed the events but uh here we go Oh, is it another one of those? You'll see when I read this now. The People's Choice Awards took place on on the 21st People's Choice Awards. Tom Hanks and Jodie Foster won Best Dramatic Motion Picture.

Speaker: And Tim Allen and Rosa Barwon, best TV shows. Cool. okay um yeah Good for them. The Estonia Kremlisk... I think I said that right. Coalition party. Send some links.

Speaker: Centrum links? Maybe? I don't know. Centrum. There's definitely a centrum in there. They won the parliamentary election in... ah Estonia? So well done then. Good for them. And no one will care about this. centrist party but sure No one will care about this next one. The graves of Sir Nicholas II and his family were found in St. Petersburg.

Speaker: Boring. and and uh Yep, that's it. Oh. What a strange day. It is. What a - oh, yeah. So. The US number one is Take a Bow by Madonna.

Speaker: And the UK number one is Think Twice by Celine Dion. Hanging on in there. Yep. Or Celine. So there is no chalkboard gag because we get straight into this episode.

Speaker: Oh yeah, you know it's going to be a long one with no chalkboard guys. It's a long one when it fucking goes straight to Bart landing on the fucking top of the car. Yeah. And our couch gag is the inverted family couch gag, which is just basically Maggie's the biggest, Homer's the smallest.

Speaker: Maggie is chuck astronomically big in this. Yeah, she's huge. This is the first time we've seen it. Yes, I believe it is. I thought so. they split This one seemed new. yeah it's weird because like i was sort of at this point it was oh back end of the season the recycling them all so then to get a new one like threw me off my stride i was like wait these are new Yep. This is dope.

Speaker: in a what will be somewhat of an interesting episode we'll get into this um We begin with... Oh, ah yeah. I once... Sorry, there's one thing I wanted to point out as well today, just because I thought it was funny. Is there anything more white? than sitting in American suburbia watching classic media and making notes on an Apple laptop for your podcast.

Speaker: Is there anything more white? Could I have made that more white? what Can anyone confirm? We were listening to Ospring's Fly Like a Light guy. she because that problem that because that's every springsteen Well, that's pretty white too.

Speaker: Yeah, i it just made it made me laugh. I was sat on the couch with the laptop ready to watch Simpsons. I was just like, Jesus Christ, I'm white. So we begin with Ion Springfield and we get the opening, which here has some new bits, which includes Kate Brockman.

Speaker: being a covered in concrete and left overnight. Yeah, like I knew we'd seen Eye on Springfield, but like some of the bits with me, I was like, wait, have we seen this before? Well, I'm not seeing that particular bit, no.

Speaker: Yeah, I'm glad you're telling me, like, some of this is, like, reused bits. I don't think we also got the bit of Christy leading the entire zoo animals into the restaurant. No. i checked with I checked with Jill, because she watched these with me, and she can confirm that this is actually a reasonable intro for the time. Yeah, there's lots of women in bikinis. It's it's the 90s, folks. This wasn't that, like, unusual. well This wasn't like a... haha isn't this ridiculous it's more just a this is just the news presented completely straight yeah this this was the setup to a joke this isn't even this isn't the guy this is just the news this is oh

Speaker: i want that on a shirt this isn't a gag this is just the news because i think that fits really well with modern times so we're going to be visiting springfield's answers of the benedict monks which is the rap in our bison there's just some right but i don't even know what what is what is this it's um it sounds is what it says on the team but in a very cringy way it is what it says on the team it's for but rabbis in rap gear and uh they don't eat pork not even with a fork

Speaker: And they just show up to the... can't touch this can't touch it This prompts home a topic. I'm dying to know what the Benedictine monks bit is about, though. No, I don't get it. They must have been like rapping monks or something in the 90s. I mean, they're they're like just a historic, like... Sect of.

Speaker: monks. you They have monasteries. They still exist. they like but that he's just Did they have a music career? Don't worry, John. that one dude in the comics will lose his shit that we didn't get this reference. It's fine. We'll be educated later. But we got the rapping right. We worked out what that was.

Speaker: I understand that they're rabbis and they rap and that's funny because there's just... It's ridiculous. Yes. Because it's silly. So it's even more silly. The family are watching this on TV and Homer turns to Marjorie and asks, are we Jewish? Marjorie confirms they're not. Homer celebrates and just pulls a cupcake out of absolutely nowhere to start eating it. They're not Catholic, are they? So what are they, like Presbyterian? Yes, that's impossible.

Speaker: Oh. Well, it won't be England, will it? Well, they're both Americans. They're Protestant. What religion are the Simpsons? Well, while Matt's looking that up, Kent gives the breaking news that we all stink, which a one man in the background gets very upset about.

Speaker: And. a again reveals that uh sprinkle the bottom of all the national surveys which oh okay so it's the western branch of american reform Presbylutheranism. Presbylutheranism. There we go. because lu Yeah, because you can be a Presbyterian and a Lutheran.

Speaker: Those are two different sets. So it's a joke. It's a gag religion. Okay, fair enough. some Some vague amalgam of multiple sects of Christianity. yeah yeah So.

Speaker: We then see that Springtroll has lasted everything, including science, and we see that Skinner's now tied to a stake, and as he's trying to point out, the UFO falls around the sun, and Abe says we have to burn him. You stole my soul. That's him chasing a cameraman that takes a photo of him.

Speaker: Yep. and they also bought them in in culture and we see that Krusty is playing a... FDR and gets out of the wheelchair while he's talking about the depression and realises he's got to get back into the wheelchair.

Speaker: admittedly that's not being uncultured that's being a shit act i think that was the joke no i get it but like that that they were saying that they're bad in court but it's like they were still putting on plays i guarantee there are places in america that do not even know what a play is oh yeah no is ah that one seems a little awkward as oh yeah we have no culture cut to a play being performed it's like well that's culture like yes you hired an actor who's fucking terrible at his job but like it is

Speaker: an attempt at culture. Yeah. but We then say, at Lisa says that people will start to avoid Springfield and Homer asks what he could do. He's just... Then he has to come because I'm one man. I'm just... counts on fingers oh sorry one man random random question yeah uh with the intro to Kent Rockman's thing.

Speaker: Do we ever see... The dragon tattoo again. Because I feel like we do. I think it's in another one. Feels familiar. There is one where they remove that and it's him and Castro in there. Roll the coaster.

Speaker: which I very specifically remember. It's burned in my brain. All right. But yes, I do also like the, but I'm only. one One man. but much just they should call it our meeting because they'll lose toists and pa is horrified because they'll be ruined Since when was Springfield a tourist town?

Speaker: Sit down. ah Since it became convenient for it to be a tourist town. For the bit, for the bit, for the bit, for the bit. But also, question, and again, the answer is probably for the bit. But is Springfield a town or a city? because there are multiple times they refer to it as ah as a town. And throughout the show... So far, they have referred to it... as a town.

Speaker: Now all of a sudden it's a city. Because it used to be a town, and then when they wanted to go to the city, they went to Capital City, the capital of Springfield. well Not the town, Springfield! The capital of the state! Springfield that is not called Springfield and is called Capital City. Well, Matt, over. Yeah, I contacted one of the writers of The Simpsons to ask him this question.

Speaker: He told me to shut the fuck up and enjoy the show. Oh, it's for the It's for the bit. Shut up and eat your popcorn. Okay. So. We come back to port and port of yours is to be ruined and we get the flashback of port selling maps to celebrities homes.

Speaker: which uh he's got a multi -bilingual thing going on because he can say in spanish and japanese which Yeah, it seems some Japanese tourists that knock on those. That was confusing for Drew Barrymore. and the magic most Can we just note, sorry, on that on the scene before that, the implication here is that Marge is the one who called the town meeting. yeah like This is happening because of Marge. When did Marge have this authority? Marge has always had this authority. she she She can call a town meeting but no one will listen to her when...

Speaker: She speaks. Except for today, spoiler alert. Except for today. It's a perfect moment. Tells him to get lost because he's hungover. He gets the apology of sorry, Miss Barrymore. Sorry, Miss Barrymore. So stupid. Can we go to the town meeting and the suggestions are being thrown out of how to get more tourists, which Patty and Selma says. Let's just change the city's name to Seinfeld.

Speaker: Or the fucking sound, like the fake, at the sound alike. uh, sting. Got me. That was funny. And the first of multiple nods to what they're doing with this episode. Like, oh, the best way to be popular is to leech off other people's popularity. yeah Yeah.

Speaker: Like starting a podcast about the Simpsons, which is popular. How dare you? How meta we all are. We're cultured, sir. Yeah, I'm getting out of the wheelchair as we speak.

Speaker: But she also has slides and... He says, you can see the wind, the windy camp. Wendy. valley where it is the last dutchman's mind Quimby then points out that this is just a picture of Bart's arse and... But there's the escape.

Speaker: but uh the blind pulls it off into the ceiling and but laments the fact that this is the last time he's going to have an escape plan devised by Milhouse. Milhouse is also trapped in the... Sorry, Bart! Someone it comes up to say her idea and everyone everyone's grumbling. but Question, question, question, yes question. yes I know the answer. Don't worry. We all know the answer, but I'm going to ask it anyway. How did Milhouse - Was Milhouse already in -

Speaker: the screen because he wasn't on the stage when bart left so that implies that he was already stuck in the screen but how is he already stuck in the screen When. it wasn't rolled up. That's a logical answer. Milhouse lives there.

Speaker: All right, fair. Yeah, you got it. of the fact there was no argument but yeah that's fine hang on i'm gonna consult my magic eight ball here and it says Uh, what do you wanna say? For the bit. Alright, cool. Right, right, right. As long as the Magic 8 -Ball says it, I agree.

Speaker: So worth much people start complaining when Marge comes up, like, oh, Marge is going to say something. i did I liked that because like I think that's like a good enough. Because Simpsons doesn't do...

Speaker: Like real callbacks. Yeah. very often and i think this one is one of those ones that's like you can get the joke if this is your first episode of simpsons yeah but if you've seen a lot of simpsons the joke is funnier. And I appreciate those kind of jokes. I think that's genuinely good writing. It's not the funniest joke in the show, but it is one of those ones that kind of rewards you for having seen Simpsons. Yeah.

Speaker: So Marge says she knows that they've been not like some of her past suggestions, which included the switching to the metric system and Abe goes off off on it because his car gets 40 rods to the hogshead and that's how he likes it. His remarks are stricken from the ah record and Abe goes, who said that?

Speaker: so the note on hang on hang on the note on that one i've got uh i'm not going to take out uh credit for that simpsons archive um ricardo lafori uh has some research on that who's bait which is to say he's done the unit conversions on that a rod is about six and a half sixteen and a half feet a hog's head is about 63 gallons uh when you crunch the numbers on that uh grandpa's car gets a about 0 .0025 miles to the gallon.

Speaker: Oh damn. That's ah okay it. Okay, that's a bit worse.

Speaker: So Marge gives off a film suggestion. film festival suggestion, and Wiggum says, can we make our own movies? Marty goes, yep. And he goes, I have an excuse to wear makeup. I, right, so this was... I, love for one, love the Wiggum joke. Always love a Wiggum joke. 100%. This is 9 -1 -2.

Speaker: um But... The thing... that kind of bugged me is, and again, this is just... how I would write the joke, I suppose, is when when someone says... Or can we make our own films?

Speaker: I thought the joke was going to be, yeah. That's what a film festival is. Not just, let's show a bunch of films. Because that's just a screening. yeah I don't know. It just kind of bugged me in that weird way of like, it took me out of the joke. Maybe I'm the asshole.

Speaker: yeah i mean like yeah no yeah yeah no no i don't mean yeah you're an asshole no yeah no like it's point of a festival but like yeah i guess they're just trying to shoehorn in the wickham joke the makeup joke yeah so

Speaker: flimby takes the vote on it and everyone goes film festival the film festival markets well actually but some or monorail festival because i've got some other ideas and everyone starts going don't push your luck so we got to the first film being made and this is uh bart and lisa and uh Bart has brought us such classics as Homer in the shower and Homer on the toilet, and now it's time for The Eternal Struggle, which has its own sign.

Speaker: And we don't see Homer struggling to get into his own trousers, which he works out the belt is buckled. And continues to struggle to get onto him, even though his trousers are fully on. Yeah, that I was thinking that. I was like, this isn't animated that well because sit his he gets his trousers on like really easily. oh We then got to down by the river and...

Speaker: that that is for me doing like a bible story thing of ah moses And I've won this thing over. Lights, camera, action. Diddly doodly action. and the basket goes in and immediately... Hold on. I want to... I want to point something out as well. He just explained the Moses myth.

Speaker: To his. Equally. religious wife. Yep. I just want to make sure. Yeah. So Maude... Yeah, you see he's helpful. So Maude puts Todd in the river and the current immediately takes him away. oh it's so funny just drop her like now gone so we just hear him go you can kind of see it coming but it is great do we hear todd going yeah so but then he goes behind some trees and sam dies me It's fantastic.

Speaker: Yeah, it's great. No, I love that bit. It was probably one of the best bits of the episode. So I panic Flanders immediately goes, Flanders to God, Flanders to God, get off your cloud and save my Todd. Landing strikes a tree, stopping Todd. So everyone cheers. Ned goes, thanks God, and God does thee. Okay.

Speaker: Oakley doakley. is this. the first canon Appearance of God. From what I... It's, uh... Have we had a canonical appearance of God? I thought we had a Treehouse of Horror appearance. No, we had, uh, Homer's Faith.

Speaker: Home of the Heretic. He speaks to God in dreams. Whether that counts as a canon appearance or just Homer's dream. opinion That's in a dream. That's in a dream. That's Homer's fantasy. Yeah, this actually happened. This is actually happening. The five fingers of God descended through the clouds and went oakly -dorkly. Phenomenal.

Speaker: So we got to... Lisa, Marge watching TV and Marge is looking for a phone. created to judge the festival. and points out there are over 600 critics on TV and Leonard Moulton is the best looking of them. Which probably needs to go here.

Speaker: I do not know what London Mountain looked like. No, I don't get that joke. hideously ugly which would be the invocation london that i'm sorry if you're that is that is If what is implied, let's Google him.

Speaker: I think he's probably a long dead so I don't think I'll get offended by that. I don't think he'd hear it anywhere. We're not that popular Michael. Give it time. He is a very arid looking bloke. he just That is just...

Speaker: A guy. yeah So we don't cut to Jay Sherman, which brings us to. The many method jokes that we're going to be hearing, because this is a crossover episode. Yeah, it is.

Speaker: which We'll get to some of the stories about this, but... Jay is doing his coming attraction show and... The feature is they're going to be looking at the aging Charles Bronson in Death Wish 9. And I left.

Speaker: It's so hard at this... see And it wasn't even that funny. It's just Charles Bronson in a hospital bed. I I mean, I don't know if anyone, either of you have seen the Death Wish films, which is just Charles Bronson. I've never seen any of them. It's just Charles Bronson with a gun shooting. people throughout the entirety of the film.

Speaker: and the plot That sounds fantastic. That's all it is. It's just like different bad guys every time. It's like people in the hood. But. some gangsters it's just Okay. He doesn't even move, he just stands there, pulls out a cannon. blows people's heads off.

Speaker: And it's 90 minutes. but ne I like the idea that he never moves throughout the whole film. He's never seen moving. Well, that's the way it is. It's just the shooting sequence from the end of Commando stretched out to 90 minutes. Hell yeah. I love that. This this joke got me.

Speaker: that ah But then cut to the special guest, Radio Wolfcastle, who's the star of the reprehensible McBain movies. No, Jay, that's not correct. and how dare you sir how dare you so we don't cut this is the first of many surprisingly important bits in this episode there is so significant in this so So, Brainy Fools Castle is introducing his new movie, which is a... mixture of action and comedy and it's called McBain. Let's get silly.

Speaker: So it's just McBain is in front of like a comedy set up wall. And his first joke is, did you ever notice how men leave the toilets? up That's the joke. That's the joke. so That's the joke. dot jpeg So. Someone in the audience says he sucks and he pulls out a machine gun and starts firing. but I want to make it clear.

Speaker: for any of the Moyes get involved. I am quoting this directly. This isn't. Not my actual legal opinion. But this is what McBain's now says. Which I have no recollection of this ever actually being said in any version of this iPad. Watched outside of Disney. It's Woody Ott. Oh my God, he's still alive. Yes, you can libel him. Shit, fucking hell. I thought I would have assumed he was dead by now, but nope, still going, 90 years old. Nope, the right quote from the Simpsons episode said by Rainier Wolfcastle. Now, my Woody Allen impression.

Speaker: I'm an erotic nerd who likes to have... different likes to sleep with little girls. Uh, sue me. He does. Well, there's some. Fuck you. Woody Allen, you ruined my childhood. there um it's It's not a fun Google. also ah I feel like...

Speaker: All three of us now can can reasonably say that was an accurate reference to an Arnold comedy film. Because ah we we just watched Twins and yeah, kind of, clearly in a way.

Speaker: Yeah. I think twins was better than that. accurate it Just a little bit of a little bit of comedy and then violence. so Oh, I see. else yeah Woody Allen's biggest fan from the crowd tells him he sucks so he throws a grenade.

Speaker: So we come back to McBain in the studio and he says that it's just him stood in front of a brick wall. It's just him in front of a brick wall. And it cost $80 million. dollars This prompts Ray J to ask him, how do you sleep at night? And his response is on top of a big pile of money with many beautiful ladies. Big pile of money with many beautiful ladies. I like how he's just like, yeesh, just ask it. So.

Speaker: Lisa finds him. Lisa thinks he's smart and sensitive and he's not obsessed with his physical appearance and Homer thinks, oh, my ears are burning. Well, it's because I'm also talking about you. And he goes, no, my ears are actually burning. I wanted to see inside my ear, so I lit a Q -tip. Would not have worked.

Speaker: No, but, you know, homologic here. I mean, the whole, one of the whole... gags of this episode is that home is an idiot so it kind of fits This bumps Marge to start writing Jay a letter and, uh...

Speaker: She starts inviting him to the... festival and uh While she's writing this Homer asks is this a pimple or a boil and Marge actually writes it into the letter. transcribes the whole thing yep She also points out that the town that... Springfield is a town. Yeah.

Speaker: Not a city. So Jay wonders if he wants to leave Manhattan and then suddenly Radio Wolf Castle is walking up to him after finally realizing he's being assaulted. I love the shot of Radio Wolf Castle like walking, speedwalking towards him as well. it's I love front thought front -facing Simpsons characters. So he pulls out the machine gun from his back to tell Jay he's going to die and Jay then says, your shoes are untied.

Speaker: Wolf Castle's response to this, they appear to be tied from here but I'm going to lean in for a closer look. Jay leaps into the kickt taxi to leave and we just go to a show. Wolfgang Castle looking at his legs. It goes to night. On close inspection, these are loafers. Oh yeah, night falls while he's staring at his shoes, yeah. This is my dad's favourite line in Simpsons. It's a very good line. It's a great line. This whole interaction is just fantastic.

Speaker: So we're down cut to the airport and the plane from New York is there. It's covered in graffiti and the pilot goes I'm landing here. I'm landing here. I don't see the family waiting. Homer's written the first name for Simpson instead of Jay's name. Marge points this out to him, so he starts writing it but keeps writing his own name.

Speaker: This is what we cut the intro. I was just going to say exactly the same. This is why you didn't get a carriage carat and chalkboard carat today. And you know what? They made the right decision. Yeah, it's great. I did i did like it. I've got it with me. Yeah, okay. I'm very simple JM comes up to Marge and he says he saw her hair from the plane and... then ask Salma. You'd be the man who didn't know he had a painful boil. Since I was a gummy bear.

Speaker: I do love this guy's voice. he's in a lot like this dude's in yeah this is what he used to be yeah this is john lovitz isn't it this is john lovitz uh regular star of the simpsons and uh star but regular recurring voice in the simpsons as various things but also a star of the critic Yep. This is an actual character he played.

Speaker: which was uh so yeah at some point i suppose we do need to address that yeah like this character is from another animated series that was on the air at the time and This whole episode is just trying to prop up the other show yeah and because it wasn't doing very well.

Speaker: And Richard also points out that this show, The Kurthik, was written by one of the Simpson writers. It was, yeah, it was written by the two showrunners from seasons three and four. And they wanted, they, they'd also.

Speaker: briefly took over show running for this episode because they wanted to promote their thing. Matt Groening wanted nothing to do with this episode, if you pay attention to the credits.

Speaker: This is the single and only episode of The Simpsons in which Matt Granning is not credited. That's crazy. Yeah, he he didn't want to be tied to a show that wasn't his, basically. He didn't think i don't think, I don't think he thought very highly of the critic. Definitely, there was a lot of thoughts around the time that the critic kind of seemed seemed a bit like a bit of a Simpsons spinoff.

Speaker: Yeah. The book Planet Simpson refers to it as the closest thing The Simpsons ever got to an actual spin -off. like their comedy style was probably similar but like in terms of like the character portrayals and like stylistically i think they were going for something almost like polar opposite But, like, the sense of humour is the same, I think. Well, it's written by people that wrote Simpsons. Yeah, of course. yeah I mean, how I have tried to watch a couple of episodes of it. it is

Speaker: I have never seen her. Okay. I've seen pictures of it, and genuinely, every time I've seen pictures of it, I thought that the character John Lovitz plays was just a character that I'd never noticed in... hit in um Hey, Arnold.

Speaker: because it's a very similar art style yeah it's a very similar art style it's a good show I did make a note on this one that maybe if we... you know start doing bonus episodes on the patreon one day like maybe that would be something worth exploring as bonus content yeah we'll watch the pilot episode or something if if there's interest

Speaker: Mmm, essentially. just in case yeah it's not something i've ever seen so i think it would be a fun one to explore as like you know the quote -unquote i mean i think that's a very simple goal to make at the moment that Let's say every, if if genuinely people, for now.

Speaker: every like 20 pounds we make because we're not we're not making any at the moment so every 20 pounds we make we will do an episode of the critic I think that's reasonable.

Speaker: Potentially yeah. I've got a file out under things you've promised people as milestones that I've completely forgotten about. I'm going to have to stop writing this down. I genuinely, I liked posting that on Blue Sky saying that I'm so excited for when someone... points out it's like matt in episode four you promised this where the fuck and i have to like be just like oh so shit and do something stupid there's a whole i'm okay with there's a whole bigfoot erotica

Speaker: oh i did promise that didn't i i promised i'd read it oh there's definitely yeah there's some june williams based uh how have we never put any of the june's june williams bits on the shorts Because I wasn't making them at the time.

Speaker: oh you need to go back and because the june i forgot about the june williams thing that was so fucking funny That lasted like... An entire season of Simpsons we were giggling about that.

Speaker: I mean, also, it predates me making them into video versions, so it's very difficult to make it into a video clip. You'd have to get the audio, and then, yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway, Simpsons. Just in case you wanted confirmation this is a crossover, the announcer on television goes,

Speaker: It's time for the Flintstones beat the Jetsons, which prompts Bart to go, I smell a cheap cartoon crossover. At which point Homer walks in and goes, Bob Simpson, meet Jay Sherman. The Critic. And Bob's response is, I love your show. I think all kids should watch it. Then turns away and shudders and goes, I feel so dirty. I feel dirty. at the time the critic was airing like immediately after the simpsons but i suspect that It certainly was never the case in the UK.

Speaker: Yeah, I... I'm not sure it aired, like, anywhere near The Simpsons in England. Did it even air in the UK, as I say? oh i'm Don't forget, Dave. No, I don't ever recall it. showing up anywhere and the only version i've ever seen is on youtube Hmm.

Speaker: and that was uh Started on ABC. And Fox. Fox moves it to a different time slot. UPN. The show was not renewed in Spain.

Speaker: It aired on Kanal Plus. And on Cartoon Network. and So, yeah no. We added spin? And fucking... America.

Speaker: yeah this has got spanish for them We then cut to Burns' office and the Darth Vader theme is playing.

Speaker: Yeah, why? Why? moveize Because it's a movie reference. because it yeah i guess that's no i think michael's got it there that yeah it's a movie reference Also, isn't... what Isn't... flinter's meet the jetsons like one of the most well -received crossovers of all time Like it's... it's hilarious it's fantastic i loved that one because it also put the gag that The Flintstones takes place in the future.

Speaker: And that has been like a long running bit now since I was a kid. Hmm. i don't i If I've seen it, I don't remember it as well. Yeah. I love this the Flintstones, even though I keep almost saying the Simpsons.

Speaker: I mean, I would say with the Imperial Marchlight, I think even if you don't immediately make the connection that this is a movie reference for... a

Speaker: a show about burns being evil yeah i didn't make that link but yeah like here's your evil character here's the theme that plays for evil people is like very easily understood right yeah yeah no it's fair so burns is worried because the profits have dropped 37 percent and smith says they have a bad image because people see him as an ogre burns's response is i will start to club them and eat them shoot them and eat them but so smith suggests he makes a movie because the Because the film might, a biography about him might make people forget the real me on Mr Burns, which is virtuous, heroic. New bio.

Speaker: Ben says you missed it. You forgot the present! And then smashes me in the face. but he says he does like the idea of the beyond i don't like smithers calling uh mr burns nubile i don't like that i don't think that's the idea that burns likes the idea because It's a Hollywood picture can help gloss over his evil rise to power like Bugsy on Working Girl.

Speaker: yeah So Burns asks for Steven Spielberg, but is informed he's unavailable. He's unavailable. Get his non -union Mexican equivalent. Next scene, we get in the next scene, which is a phenomenal joke. Please tell me we get another appearance of Senor Spielbergo at some point. I don't think so. That's a shame. That'd be so funny. If there was just this running gag that whenever...

Speaker: Anything was directed in Springfield. It was directed by Seniors Peelback. The amazing guys have done that. So. Oh, that's great. The burn says he wants sir him to He wants him to do what Schindler did first.

Speaker: but What Spielberg did for Oskar Schidler. Let's see how bad a girl's answer this is. Chile is better. Burns del Diablo. This is Bob Spurn to say that he and Spielberg are like, he and Schindler are like two peas in a pod.

Speaker: Because they were both factory owners. They both made shells for the Nazis. They both made shells for the Nazis. These bitburns worked. for Mine worked. Damn it. Oh, burns. It's amazing.

Speaker: It's one of those things where it's like that joke would be funny if we weren't worried about actual Nazis now. Yeah. Yeah. So we cooked to the... Family having dinner and...

Speaker: Marge says that... Jay should get the last bottle chopped at home and still hungry. We then see the stomachs having a dog fight on underneath the table. This got a weird chuckle. I was i was um amazed at how...

Speaker: funny I found things because it's so dumb. This leads to... a Oh, my stomach's being the slightly more aggressive than Jay's going off for whimpering, but... Jay gets the pork chop. These are Sturbeys Awards.

Speaker: And. Jay starts showing them off. Yeah, this is great. He pulls the prizes. He's got his golden globes in his trousers. It's so hot in here. He's got his golden and globes in his trousers. the Doesn't know where his Emmy is. Santa's little helper coughs it up. Ah, there it is. Jesus, man. Santa's little helper fucking swallowed that thing. So Homer tells him that he won the belching contest at work and belches in his face. Everyone laughs. And Jake goes, hmm, very nice. And then.

Speaker: It's a hell of a boop that comes out of this man. That's a king burp, that. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's hard to follow the alarms. Well, it has it. i Yeah, I loved Bart giving him the trophy. so lisa asks how many blows everything off all the plates everyone's like swept back yeah fall so lisa asks how many prizes can winners can do that he says just me and you dora wealthy

Speaker: Sorry, it's over. Okay, sure. I had to look up who that was. An author who is, at I think, at time of writing ah the episode, like 80 years old.

Speaker: Nice. slick him down That says a lot about Krusty as well, actually. Yeah, it would have been easy at the time. to be fair no no no i think she was 80 at time of writing the episode oh oh right yeah Oh so she's long dead. Yeah she's very dead now.

Speaker: So. Well, she says she's in invited her sisters and Jay gets excited. Ooh, sisters, allow me. Can we just hear them all? Oh, the scream. The scream is immaculate. Eudora Welty was born in 1909. Holy shit. Definitely did.

Speaker: That's older than my nan. So we then see them all sitting on the sofa and Jay Allen starts doing some smart little lyrical. Ah, I said the Woody Allen world. come to do but satchel is smarter Did everyone laugh? I didn't really get this. I thought Homer's was better when he goes, Scooby -Doo. Yeah, I thought Scooby -Doo's was funnier. But Jimmy Carter's... I think they're probably... i I don't know. Are they just making a poke at like... quote unquote, highbrow humor anyway. Yeah, maybe. if That makes sense actually, yeah.

Speaker: the sisters then ask him to tell them who's gay and uh I'll be fine. Feinstein is gay. yeah well we know that no way she's very shocked by this And then, who else? And then Homer whispers into J .D. and he goes, oh, MacGyver.

Speaker: which points the sisters gang up on him and we just hear him laughing like a school girl behind the sofa we could go to jay hanging from the drainpipe by his underwear and focus that I... I don't know if this is a - is a - reference to the critic and any of those critic heads out there that also happen to listen to Mo Man in the Morning.

Speaker: If you could confirm if it is a... a bit on a reference or not. because it just feels like they didn't know how to end the joke. Because he just babbles. Why does he babble?

Speaker: but like ah Because he's been beaten up to the point of... Like, yeah. It just doesn't, it just doesn't, it's not a punchline. The punchline was him hanging from... the guttering by his underwear. Why did they then have Bart come in?

Speaker: and be and have have him say something But... this This felt like another, hey, Bart exists. yeah These have been in the episode. Yeah, I mean. it did feel like it lingered a little long like they could have easily cut away after you but this is why we didn't have an intro got attack oh this it yes yeah this is this is where that intro where you've got to give Get your money out of John Lovitz. He's got to do with some bambly lines.

Speaker: that' That's fair, yeah. I mean, i' like yeah, I'll listen to John Lovitz read the phone book, man. We then go to Marge and help her in bed and Marge says she's making up the jury list for them. for the film festival which includes mayor quimby oh no this is this is also where some of your intro ends as well yeah yeah yeah so how am i smart if she respects his intelligence we get The long intro.

Speaker: about what the chalkboard gag would have been. pause yeah yeah yes okay good night and then he goes wait a minute why did it take you so long to answer so We don't get the... ah Beep. Another but the multiple second long pause. Yeah, but the carbon resume me the carbon rod going into Homer's back lung.

Speaker: And uh... And then, uh, Hubba goes, Michael's measured this, guys. He knows. The science is aboard. So Helman then goes, wait a minute, are you humouring me? And about the time it takes Bart to skateboard down the east street.

Speaker: Yes. the the The thing is, is like the first one was funny. And then the second one was kind of like... The punchline. You know what I mean? Like that was you were like, OK, the joke's done now.

Speaker: i think they're trying to do rule of threes with humor here it's like things are funnier the third time you see it's like we're homer writing his name three times on the sign like if three times he worth weirdly enough that was i don't think homer doing that was funny each time i don't think it's a bad joke No, it's not. It's just, I think...

Speaker: I think silence in a joke is very difficult to keep consistently funny. And thus Marge being silent. for extended periods of time.

Speaker: just kind of gets... Grating? yeah like got also specifically a character who's not known for being the funny one deploying silence as a tool for humor yeah yeah is difficult to make work So Farmer's response is, ah, good night. today He wakes up and goes, wait a minute, that's bad.

Speaker: Let's hope it's a C9W. He might not be smart, but he, uh... But like that critic bit, he knows all the songs for the Oscar Mayer song. And at that moment, John Lovitz comes out and he's now singing the Oscar Mayer hot dog song. sure this does feel like a weird like now that i now that i know that This is a crossover episode, because I suspected it because they made the Flintstones joke, but I didn't actually know at the time of watching.

Speaker: ah But... it does make it seem like they are just... begging you to watch The Critic. Oh, they are. They absolutely are. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I didn't... i I mean, obviously, it didn't air in the UK, so I never knew...

Speaker: When I was younger, this was a a crossover episode. Oh, yeah. no i I just assumed. I didn't even know what the fuck a crossover episode was. Oh, no. I just thought this was a character they introduced. Yeah, it's like, oh yeah, this is the they like they so often do. Here's one character for one episode that's a bit, that's, there we go. Cool. That was a fun diversion, right? Yep. The Simpsons. Yep, they needed a film critic. That's fine.

Speaker: Yeah, exactly. So he does the whole song and he... yeah really belts out that final note as the dog's howling. o then goes it's not even a brand you get in the uk and i know the song now because of this so almost response this is uh well jake you might as well just sleep with him i'll just take a look at your hair that's it he knows the whole hot dog song go ahead sleep with him it's just you and me now a lock of hair above karma says march fixie's stupid if march fixie's nothing then uh

Speaker: Please, let's put me on the film. jury festival march, reluctantly does it, and crosses Martin Scorsese's name off and puts Homer's name on it. I like that, I don't know why that got a giggle out of me, just Martin Scorsese being on the list. So we're down cut to the auditorium and it's time to see the actors that are going to audition for Mr Burns, so Anthony Hopkins is first.

Speaker: in his hand of the ring of Excellent. time Yeah, this was... That's alright. I didn't mind it. sir We don't get William Shatner. And then we get Choma who tells it exactly.

Speaker: Exactly. I think... that is good i think I think it's because I... I'm fairly certain I've never seen either of these episodes.

Speaker: well i must have seen the loafers i this one because i the look i know the loafers guy but I don't remember these episodes very much. and Hannibal Lecter and William Shatner being referenced as like, you know, sort of... mo Again with the movie theme.

Speaker: Yeah, movie characters. It's so overdone now. that it that Because we had this with ah with another episode, like, ages back. where I said the same thing. that This is now...

Speaker: Simpsons kind of... Created. a lot of jokes i don't know if they created this one i don't think they did But. they were on the forefront of a lot of jokes. Whereas now... a lot of people I've experienced these jokes so many times. that even when you go to the original, It's just not that funny anymore.

Speaker: and that's just kind of what happened to me it's just like i've heard so many people do Hannibal impressions. All William Shatner impressions. My dad. That. I just... Yeah, I don't.

Speaker: Yeah, it just, I don't know. It didn't do anything for me, personally. I'm sure at the time it was very funny. But I did enjoy it. Bumblebee man going, excellent. And Spielberg going... That was good. That was fine. I like the... I most just like that that's the one Senor Spielberg likes. Yeah, exactly. That's the guy. He's muy bueno. He's muy bueno. There's his responses. And then he is in the movie. yeah He is in his movie. He's on the feature. Yeah, the director was impressed with his acting chops. What do you want? Yeah, he's one of the featured... He's one of the featured actors.

Speaker: But Burns decides he's got to play the part himself. so we don't cut too outside the Cinema and, uh... We've heard that the film festival's advertised, but Dr. Hibbert's showing up in his Rocky Horror.

Speaker: picture shopping because he thought that was on i guess they just wanted to throw in another movie reference Yeah, I guess so. yeah So we begin the film festival and our first film is by Apu. and it's quite light beef jerky it's just literally the quickie mark cctv of who being all spliced together from yeah and uh who calls for the police and we see the chief we're gonna be stuck in the hot dog machine i got my own problems here oh boy this is gonna get worse before it gets better what wrong which

Speaker: no Very true. He climbs inside the oven. I think he gets pulled. is says His tie's pulling him in, isn't it? sure brie yeah i like how everyone applauds seems like he's reaching in to try and get himself out but i'm like oh like can that seems like a very wiggum solution though yeah we can get a uh mo the bartender in mo better booze and it's mo in a tuxedo and full makeup uh doing his own song over

Speaker: one more round, you stupid clown. And when he gets you one more round, then you're out on your ass. It ends with Mo falling off the bar and you're just going, ah, come back. Oh, that got a chuckle. That got a chuckle. Someone, I think, on Simpsons Archives said that was a reference to Cabaret. Yeah. That makes sense. It's Liza Minnelli, isn't it?

Speaker: Yeah, the makeup looked familiar. Bye, guys. I'm sorry to say this but we're gonna have to pack things in now. all right Because we have reached a high point of culture and I don't think anything we can do is ever going to top what what has happened now.

Speaker: Alright, yeah, now I can understand why. because might let's all brace ourselves because we have to really break down. ah this next bit Because it's time for... Hans Moorman Productions yeah And a very friends small man productions present. A very reputable studio.

Speaker: And we get man being hit. Bye, football. So we cut two hands and it's a very art deco. Theme of him just sounding very minimalist. He's just sat there, minding his own business.

Speaker: and then Michael's loving this. And then... He's planned this. Yeah, you thought about this. Sorry, continue. John, we have to pretend to be serious. We're serious critics. We're critics and scene. We arent see are the film critic. We've got our own show on Canal TV in Spain.

Speaker: Let's be proper about this. Excuse me, Michael. Yeah. It's Canal+. Would Senor Spielberger settle for just Canal? No, he would not.

Speaker: it's not That's no -brainer. No bueno. so more my and but We're fucking idiots. and of course we get the magnificent twist of uh more man is standing there minding his own business and then A football flies into frame.

Speaker: Oh, the grace of a dying swan. And it hits Mo Man, squarely in his groin. and the noise this thing makes Yeah.

Speaker: It really amplifies the whole thing. Moma goes down. It's a great Greek tragedy of an event. Honestly, Michael, I think your interpretation might be wrong with the Greek thing. I think it's more an interpretation of America's involvement in the creation of nuclear weapons.

Speaker: yeah well and We get a powerful display of emotion from Hans here. is' possibly one of the standout performances of his career. Well, I think so, yeah. If you want a good laugh, just freeze frame it when you get there. The facey, the facey. Of course, Homer doesn't see any of this. like but He's just howling with laughter as he declares that the contest is over. Give Hans his $10 ,000.

Speaker: Jay has to point out this is not America's Funniest Home Videos, but Homer's just like, his group the ball is growing. It works on so many levels. It works on so many levels. He then asks for it to be played again.

Speaker: So we come to Barney's extra bar to say it's time for his movie. But then, surprise, thatston you made a movie. Barney's response is... they'd be equally surprised by saying i made a movie i made a movie no wonder i'm on the unit entertainment weekly which is this body in like a black and white pose Hmm.

Speaker: So, Barney's movie begins and, uh... We see that there's kind of a black and white noir kind of thing going on. under Bonnie says that he's single, he's 40, he drinks and then starts ah doing a quote.

Speaker: So he says there's a line in Othello about being a drinker. Now a sensible man. Bye now fool. I'm presently a beast. That pretty much covers it. You get it. Then we cut to Barney's now an old man and the woman watching does. He's got the focus of a soul phone. He goes, oh, you're very kind. She then asks him if something crawled down his throat and died. It didn't die. She then comes back to the phone and Bonnie's...

Speaker: announces that he's an alcoholic and leads us to point out he's at a girl scout meeting. My least response to this is... Is it? I'm not afraid to admit you don't have a problem. he's he's right he's right you know so we get the sad piano music as bonnie goes don't cry for me i'm already dead as the rose i'm already dead as the rose wilton everyone loves it marge is crying jay goes i think that's the winner Elmo walks in holding a beer saying, what did I miss?

Speaker: my chest is golden there's one more movie and it's time for a burns world season So, as we said... Bumblebee Man makes the credits. Tommy Toon is Smithers. Yeah. Is Tommy Tuna reference something that sounds familiar?

Speaker: Sounds like Tidy. Tim. He's me. Oh, Tommy Toon was an actor, dancer, singer, theatre director, producer and choreographer. Yeah, he was a good one. Good on him. So Burnsy's on the...

Speaker: awesome he says he's going to bring jobs to mexico and football b man is delighted by that um because Viva Senor Burns! cost Of course Burns pulls off his horse as he's dragged around. Burns in the car goes, we took 20 takes. We did 20 takes and that was the best one. We don't go back to the form and Burns is just doing the easy ending.

Speaker: Frame for frame, which is phenomenal. And the artist of this is sort of tribe. Ben says he doesn't care what they say because he's going to win. Ben Zender's Ben -Hur and the he giving gives out the water. Ben -Hur goes, You really are the king of kings. Phil Hartman doing Ben -Hur, yeah. Oh, is that Phil Hartman? That's Phil Hartman, yeah. So Burns looks at this. So the sky looks excellent because he's covered in the heavenly glow.

Speaker: And the the audience starts booing and my favourite joke of the episode now comes on. Oh, that's so good. the So Burns goes, are they booing me? And Smiths goes, no, the thing. Wins, wins. This bumps Burns to stand up and go, are you saying who are Burns? I like how he asks. He's trying to clarify. So he gets pelted with rubbish. I was saying boo words. So he gets pelted with rubbish as Hans. Apparently he was saying the words.

Speaker: peek behind the curtain uh the rubbish being thrown at burns is the most posted gif in the mole man in the morning discord every time michael postpones a recording he gets a boo earns i fucking live for it I think we have two we have two major bits in...

Speaker: in our podcast thing now, and it is that. And then instead of actually... formally agreeing on a dare. Someone will just suggest today. one of us will say the same day again and then the other person will yell the day so it'll just be like can we do sunday sunday sunday and that's it that's how we decide

Speaker: Yep. The system works. I'm not sure how that came to be, but I'm okay with it. It was me. Instead of being a professional, you two would be like, oh, I could do this day, and then I would just yell the day. To confirm that I am free. It's like, Monday! Yep. Right off the point. of So we then cut to the judge's room and...

Speaker: Jay votes for Barney's sensitive but unfortunately titled film, Buker Hunters. March 2nd, but then couldn't be... Christy both say they're going to vote for Burns' movie because Christy wants to hurry things along because he's got a date with Eudora Welty who burps.

Speaker: Coming Eudora. Coming Eudora. You then see that the camera's been hidden in one of the sandwiches and Burns confirms that he did indeed pay off those two judges. Which worked for him in the Miss Teen America part. I've seen so many cartoons that use the olive on a sandwich as the camera. It's a weirdly consistent bit. I think it happens in Ed, Edd n Eddy and Codename Kid Next Door. Yeah, it's a weird. I wonder where that originated and why the olive. Probably Simpsons, to be honest. It's a very Simpsons -esque bit.

Speaker: I guess. Yeah. An incontinent old man has won Miss Teen America. Of course it's Burns in his dress. So, Jayden asks... Isn't he... i Sorry, I just wanted to... Isn't he doing the um the same pose he does for his naked portrait? He is. It's not the same... picture but it's the same pose right yeah it's very similar uh not sure maybe So Jay asks Christy how we could vote for Burnsy's movie and Christy's response is... Let's say it moved me.

Speaker: To a bigger house. To a bigger house. And we've seen this one quoted many times of, oops, I said the quiet part loud and the loud part quiet. Oops. It's another one of those lines that's just like alarmingly important for this episode. yeah So Jay then asks Homer what he's voting for and Homer of course is voting for football in the groin.

Speaker: And Marge says, why don't we have a five minute break to talk about this? And Homer says, his brain's going a mile a minute and just two monkeys picking fleas off each other. I love the inside of Homer's head. That's great. It's a consistent bit and it's always funny. So Marge then points out to Homer that she put him on the jury and he voted for the stupidest woman.

Speaker: almost responses he had every right to be on that jury even if he only got there because he was sleeping with the head of the festival and uh Jay comes out and says, how many times do I hear Rex Reed say that? what's up Well done, Rex. I guess. Schultz fired a rex raid. I don't know about well done. so it Hey, you got laid. So Farmer says, are you going to make fun of me and Jago Snow? Doesn't matter, I had sex. Yeah, sex is normal.

Speaker: So, Elmer says, so are you making fun of me? And he goes, no, I won't make fun of you, but I'm going to suggest there are better things in life than seeing a manga hidden in the groin of a football. At that exact moment, Jay's hidden. growing up football has nelson laptop camera going yeah by nelson i imagine in same noise same And Majk asks Elmer what he thinks, and Elmer says he's got some serious thinking to do, and then we come back to the monkeys now doing jackals. I saw E equals.

Speaker: Or EM equals... And then I didn't know what the maths on the right was. They're doing a... Fuck, what are those? in Integration, something like that? I'm not sure. as as As established, the Simpsons writers are all fucking maths nerds. I'm yeah i'm honestly surprised it was.

Speaker: as quote -unquote basic as that like I expected something like really fucking nerdy on the board for for the maths nerds but yeah dy over dx equals x cubed.

Speaker: so I don't remember my A -level maths well enough to know whether that's meaningful or not. I remember my primary school maths. The farmer starts watching the films again, and, uh, now my point's out that Barney's movie did have heart, but Football in the Groin had Football in the Groin. It's fair. That's fair. That's fair. so But he then sets the line. don't cry for me i'm already dead and homo's response to this is wow i will never drink another beer A beer salesman walks past him and goes, I'll take 10.

Speaker: Why is there a beer salesman in a theater? zone I was going to say, I love that they sent the guy in to sell to like an empty theatre. They knew it was Homer. They knew it was Homer. Yeah, they yeah no that they don't do that that that's it. That's the answer. Well, they do do this bit in a later episode.

Speaker: Ladies, sending my kids to college. So we then see the awards being announced. And the first one is for Itchy and Scratchy's Four Funerals and a Wedding, which... ah Scratchy's about to get mad. Why did they show the animation?

Speaker: Why did they show the film again at the award ceremony? Also, is itchy and scratchy made in Springfield? Why was this not shown at the festival? Why was this shown at the awards ceremony? How did it win if it wasn't a category beforehand? When did it become a category? We have to assume that the entire festival that we saw wasn't like, exhaustive.

Speaker: Hmm. I don't know if I'm still leaving. And the answer to all of your other questions for the bit. Yeah, alright, fair enough. So we don't see what the episode is. Scratchy's wife gets abducted and replaced by a wife made of dynamite. ity It's illicit.

Speaker: Scratchy lives a full ass. for life including his dynamite children. Peace. Mannequin finally blows up. And old Itchy comes in to laugh that has a heart attack. And everyone laughs hilariously.

Speaker: There are only two funerals. I want my money back. Yeah, they stole from me. Well, it's three because the mannequin died. I'm assuming he murdered the wife at the start. What a bastard. Maybe, maybe. Yeah, that's true.

Speaker: Cool. That's fine. I'll allow it. Carry on. and the winner of the grand prize is of course Barney And Burns is annoyed. Bitter. Marge, thanks so much for doing the right thing. under Alma says, you know something Marge, it's not that tough being a film critic.

Speaker: no he says crickets oh sorry i meant to say crickets I book it. that it's It is funny. No, when you when you repeat a line where the character deliberately says something wrong. You then have it in your head that they say it wrong. So then you say it. You say the wrong line wrong, which then means you say it right. It's a weirdly consistent brain thing.

Speaker: Yeah, I have a I'm doing lots of meta here. Yes, Michael, you're just being really smart. That's all it is. Thank you. You didn't fuck up. No one's laughing at you. Thank you. So. Now Barney says that it's time that he's got to show his gift of the world, which is now that he's there's a new Barnard Gumbel.

Speaker: What the name Barnard? because Yeah, not Bernard. It's Barnard. Yep. ah Hard working, clean and sober. unfortunately the grand prize is the lifetime supply of duff beer which Barney says lifetime supply of duff beer Barney asks her to be hooked up to his vein and the medical staff come and do it

Speaker: I love that they've got the adapter for the keg tap to IV on hand. It's a amazing. Yeah, they they they knew their audience. So we don't go to the airport and Lisa says, if you ever place Carnegie Hall, she'll give Jay a call. And Jay goes, if you want to visit my show, you should start down. but that We're not doing that. No, no, no, no, no.

Speaker: I like to think that but Bart saying no was like the only thing Matt Grening demanded to happen yeah so looking in order for this to go forward.

Speaker: So Marge says to Joe that she hopes he'll tell his New York friends that People from small towns aren't stupid. robber comes with his jaw not exactly full of stakes and he's fully aware of this fact into Unfortunately he gets hungry and opens it.

Speaker: And Mark says... Yep. This much gets the moral story of... the right film one and er Mr Burns let things get before. We cut to six months earlier where the Oscars are now taking place. Mr. Burns says that he's bribed everyone in Hollywood.

Speaker: We then get another meta joke of George C. Scott winning. the oscar even though he absolutely hated the oscars which was the sole reason he was used for this bit That's really doesn't really that funny. Okay. And we don't just cook the George C. Scott. being hit and going by the football and it's acting up.

Speaker: Alright. My groin. My groin. Again. high points of culture And that's your episode folks. Yeah. Cool. That was a crossover episode.

Speaker: I hope you all felt inspired to go and watch the show that will be airing next after this one. on Fox. Or canal plus road Spanish food. John, you've never sounded more like you've had a gun to your head other than the Annie intros.

Speaker: Yeah, this was... this This episode was made to sell a different TV show. I don't know what you want from it. This episode is probably my first example of... this Everything in this show. Episode is ridiculous.

Speaker: Yeah, it's very goofy. I fucking can love it. yeah it's great i definitely think it's a it's a fun and very goofy episode i could not complain with this I thought it was a weak episode. I think it has some very important bits in it, but I think on the whole, on its merits, like it's quite a weak episode. but The plot is... barely there. It's a crossover thing. But the bits. and from the best bits and yeah it's It's just...

Speaker: pure goofery. It's very very silly. And like ah like John said, it had way more classic lines. Then I thought, because even hook it to my veins is one that is like endlessly re -quoted.

Speaker: yeah i didn't even write that one i i noted like at least four like fairly you know as we as we have come to say important bits i hadn't even filed. hook it to my veins amongst them so make that five yeah yeah there's that yeah there's a lot Yeah. I don't know. Like, for for for all the important bits, I was just like, eh, it's an okay episode. It just wasn't. like that special for me.

Speaker: I find it very funny and goofy. Yeah. Fair enough, yeah.

Speaker: Yeah, he kind of just had everything I would want. Yeah, senior Spielberg. I want - I want that and a pair of MeUndies, just seeing a Spielberg - Spielbergers face on the ass of a pair of MeUndies.

Speaker: but speaking of i'm actually wearing me undies right now are you real oh you actually went and bought some I bought some last, well, Jill bought some last year and then they went missing. So we bought more.

Speaker: And I'm wearing them now. okay Are they everything you hoped they would be? Dude, they genuinely are the most comfortable underwear I've ever worn! That's not - we're not even sponsored yet. They're fucking great. I love the optimism inherent in the word yet there. Well, MeUndies, we will be sponsored by MeUndies one day, and we will get um ah my greasy little piglet we will get my greasy little piglet on a pair of MeUndies.

Speaker: I don't think they just do text. They're usually, like, designs, aren't they? Nah, we'll get them to change. Well, MeUndies, I think we've proven on this podcast that we've at least earned one sale, even if it was by one of our own hosts. but Yeah!

Speaker: We can sell undies. We can do it. That does money. Hmm. Or underwear. Meeple roll. Cool. Yeah. So, I mean, like, is there more to say about The Critic? Like, it was a show that aired on, I think it was the ABC.

Speaker: ah Did... relatively poorly. Got picked up by Fox. fuck i tried I did hear that they tried to make a revive. I think they tried to revive it didn't they? Yeah, to the...

Speaker: 2000 or something. Does, uh... Wikipedia page notes a web series released. I guess using... shockwave who remembers shockwave in 2000 through 2001.

Speaker: There are two more episodes. of The Simpsons, where Jay appears. Hurricane Eddie. and Ziff who came to dinner. Oh, yeah, now I remember. Okay, well, Ziff is... Voiced by John Lovitz, so that kind of makes sense. Hurricane Neddy, I remember the premise of the episode. He's in a mental hospital.

Speaker: oh uh okay very very minor role then but okay yeah and then in one of the episodes of The critic. Two of the characters go dressed as Homer and Marge.

Speaker: And Homer and Bart make an appearance in Dial M for Mother. okay yeah i mean like there is a lot of crossover between like the the characters that... that are in the critic and the simpsons well nancy cartwright voice of bart uh played margot sherman and other voices in the critic Name I didn't expect to see on the cast list. Doris Grau, aka Lunch Lady Doris, played Doris Grossman in The Critic. Yeah.

Speaker: ah Maurice Lamarche, who played... A number of various minor voices in The Simpsons and Futurama. played a number of various voices in this as well yeah and Tress McNeil as well There's a few names that just like overlap heavily here. so someone uh michael said they tried to revive it they tried to revive it in 2000 on They did webisodes.

Speaker: Yeah, that's what I was saying, on shockwave .com. Oh, sorry, yeah, I was yeah reading the same thing, so I was barely listening. michael Right. So we do out of homers and then what little this thing had to say about society. Sure, yeah, go on. I gave it a my dad's favourite line from The Simpsons, out of Homer.

Speaker: Classic. Cool. As in it is a classic, not that his favourite line is classic. You get it. You guys are smart. yeah clean Michael. I'm sorry, I've got to give this a homer out of hope.

Speaker: I thought there was a possibility because you were really keen But I wasn't sure. That's cool. Oh, shit. I just love this episode. The bits carry on.

Speaker: No, I agree it's great. i I wasn't... prepared to give it a homer but it is genuinely say if you' play on the ball think it is really good couldve given it a critic at the homema X. the thing is is whenever i do my out of homers they take so much longer now Because I know you guys well enough that I usually know what you guys are going to give it. to if like If I think, if oh, if John likes this episode, they're going to give it this.

Speaker: If they don't like the episode... they're probably going to use this. I'm not always right, not saying that, but... You know. yeah so i So I end up sitting there. I genuinely would like... paused the episode like during the credits stared up at the ceiling and just try to think. And I was like, okay, this works.

Speaker: Mildly fascinated then, what what what... What rating do you think I gave him? No, i't off the top of the dome now, I couldn't guess. I wish I was that quick, but no. I hope you gave it a J out of home.

Speaker: a Or the critic out of armor. Uh, I mean, ah I suppose in a roundabout way I kind of... Did, because I gave it the winner of a belching contest at work out of Homer. Because it's not very good, but it is impressive.

Speaker: i'll get Do you know the guy the guy that has like the Guinness World Record for longest belch had to be like hooked up to an oxygen machine afterwards? what Jesus Christ. Oh, no, no, no. Sorry. He needed to go into a decompression chamber. That was it. What?! Yeah, cause he fucked up his lung! Thanks.

Speaker: How do you belch long enough to give yourself the bends? How does that work? Because I think he... I think he belched for like... two minutes. Well, I suppose there is a danger. We've got too much air coming in. Yeah, something like that. The longest... This episode's long enough, isn't it? The longest belch.

Speaker: Go on. No, not longest beach. Longest belch. I did recently learn that the Guinness World Records will discontinue awards if they deem them to be unsafe for people to do.

Speaker: The longest burp is 1 minute and 13 seconds. 57 milliseconds. I like how they thought then they needed to point out the the milliseconds as if people were really that close to...

Speaker: to doing it. but Yeah. You never know. You never know. One one one minute and 13 seconds. i'm the half And a hook. Yeah. Yeah, and and like I said, as far as I'm aware, he had to go to go into like a...

Speaker: A decompression chamber afterwards, or something like that. Okay. I'm struggling to understand the logistics that would require... a decompression chamber but i can see you needing some sort of medical intervention after it.

Speaker: Fair enough. hold on sorry i know i'm already delaying this episode but this was a link This was a link on the website I was just on. What? Fucking what?

Speaker: Please, please show that in the in the video episode. What the f - focus that picture with that headline. Uh...

Speaker: For reference, it is a headline that says trial by combat may still be legal in America, but the picture I'm fairly certain is a pornographic pillow fight. I would say that is very much what that illustration is, yes. I'm beginning to understand why Americans like capital punishment so much as this is.

Speaker: I'd go out like that, yeah, why not? Yeah, this is my version of - It's trial. It's not execution by pillow fight. It's just trial. The winner of the pillow fight, like, gets acquitted. What a way to get acquitted.

Speaker: yeah I beat those girls with those pillows. Just going in there. It's like, oh no, I'm going to win this one. yeah Fuck them up. I'm not done. Winding up with a pillow. I'm wearing leather armor. They're wearing bikinis. Fucking idiots. I am not dying today.

Speaker: Anyway... What did this episode say about society? ah If there was a message to be taken from this episode, it is that you should watch The Critic airing immediately after this episode on Fox. yeah Always check your shoes for loafers.

Speaker: yeah i mean it it was kind of all over the place because it had like a lot of references to media culture as much as yeah it was a crossover it was like a crossover and it was promoting the critic and the critic is about media culture. So there was a lot of jokes about media culture. And then obviously jokes at the expense, I suppose. of small town America. yeah And then I guess the overall message was the Oscars are kind of bullshit.

Speaker: Which they are. but but because i like that burns was like i bribed half of all of hollywood that's just what the oscars are dude yeah no my my i had the the exact same stretch of a takeaway which was hollywood award shows are hotbeds of corruption because like we also see even like the small like a small town um the springfield award show is like well one of the judges got there by sleeping with the organizer Yeah.

Speaker: Matt Groening, if you would like to bribe me to always give the episodes of Homer out of Homer... You can. Yeah. to I am willing to take that.

Speaker: Look, we learned a lot about society. Rabbis can rap. Popopopos. footballs for the groin are always funny So Lisa's wedding. No, let's not do this. So, Lisa's wedding.

Speaker: once burn do you Do you want to talk more about footballs to the ground? No, it's fine. No, he wants to talk about episode one of The Critic. He's watched it. He's going to read it all out to us. I watched it on the whole thing. He's going to perform it.

Speaker: Oh, hello. No, that's not. Lisa's Wedding, episode 19 of season 6, aired March 19th, 1995.

Speaker: Bonnie Blair skates female world record point total, which was 156 .450. well done i guess not as impressive as one minute and 30 15 seconds and 57 milliseconds we're really struggling with with stuff on this day arizona begins new telephone area code 520 outside of phoenix oh my god fucking stop the presses The Finnish Social Democrats won the election. Hold on to them. And Michael Jordan rejoined the Bulls after trying a career in baseball.

Speaker: I seem to recall... Oh, yeah. I seem to recall we read the reverse of that when he retired. I think we read that out on the show when that first happened. This has come up before, yeah. We've definitely talked my talked about Michael Jordan's baseball career at some point. yeah is Pretty much the plot of Space Jam.

Speaker: And we have confined the Looney Tunes and magical space powers for Michael Jordan's return to basketball. Mmm. also there's a sound there's a song that's filming we can no longer reference for Interesting reasons.

Speaker: Uh, the NBA? New York Knicks beat the New York Nets for... hundred in the undrift meeting. At the time, that was Nix 53, Nets 47. and again well done and uh good for the next and neil marshall skates the world record of three kilometers but you did it that's all right it's not impressive it's one minute and 50

Speaker: there's some plays that even i think it's too boring performances yeah um Some people died but I don't really know who they were. Yeah. this Sorry, I don't mean to sound cowardly about that, but hang on, I'll reference this guy. No, no, no, no, no. what would Why do you not care about Kenneth Loveless, British priest, concertina player and folk dancer dying at age 83? What a combo! You know what yeah i know what? I glossed over that, but having read that, that's a...

Speaker: Hello. Sorry, let me say that again. He was British Priest. concertina player and folk dancer what a combo i suppose i feel like i saw him at the ren fair yesterday i suppose concertina's and morris dancing kind of fit together so yeah It sort of makes sense.

Speaker: Yeah, a little bit okay your us number one is still madonna we take a bow but the uk newborn has changed to Love Can Build A Bridge, which was by Cher. Chrissie Hynde? Neenah Cherry.

Speaker: and Eric Clapton. Does anyone actively listen to Cher? I mean really. If you believe it's a bagger. Presumably someone. Meow. it's It's a great song to like hear on the radio, but I'm never putting it on a playlist.

Speaker: You mean the shirt t -shirts I got you for Christmas I'm gonna go to waste? Michael, if you got me a Cher t -shirt for Christmas, I'd wear it every time I met you. Even if we were a formal gathering I would wear it.

Speaker: Well, I hope you like your share me on this. i Jill laughed at that. In the other room. Well. I know what you're wearing to Michael's wedding now.

Speaker: basic I will! No, get me a full - Share. Kigurumi onesie? I'll wear that to your wedding. Hell yeah. No, I'm just getting you a shirt. t-shirt I expect you to pair with me on this.

Speaker: Ha! Sold. Sold, sir. it's a Sold. It's a casual themed wedding. All right, shall I get on to this episode then? Yeah. Go on then, still work Lisa's wedding. Okay, so we have a chalkboard gag, which is, I will not strut around like I own the place.

Speaker: this got a chuckle but in that way of like do you know when you chuckle at something and go wait a second that wasn't funny Yep. I don't exactly remember. Yeah. it's like I laughed, but then I was like, this, what? What? so we don't get the chop The couch gag, which is the family on a trampoline smashing into the ceiling. Wait, hold on. Imagine getting detention for being arrogant. Yeah. I think that's okay. That's bullshit.

Speaker: Well, I guess yeah. Yep, into the ceiling on the trampoline is your couch kick. Yeah, that's second second outing, last scene in Lisa on Ice.

Speaker: So the episode begins with... shockingly a renaissance there over Night battle today. why why the hyphen who to really emphasize the date i guess Yeah, I didn't know if it was like...

Speaker: If the joke is just, oh, lol, ye olde English. But I didn't think that get it. I think that's what they were going for. Yeah. i think american yeah white understanding it so we then begin with the two knights having a fight one night gets his face absolutely smashed Peace. Yeah.

Speaker: And we say that that night was actually Ned, and Ned says he did. Wie meiterlich smiterlich. my myself I just never get tired of Ned Flanders being shown to be manly.

Speaker: yeah I never get tired of it. So, that reveals that Zalens is a random source of words short for gods, wounds, that the smiterly was That's pure Flanders, baby. That's pure Flanders. But NC Smithers, who was the other night, left up his visor going, please cut. Please call the doctor. to

Speaker: Well, it says that Renaissance bears are boring, but Marge says, ah, did you see the loom? I took a loom and then we see Marge quickly go off and loom. How old is Marge? How old is Marge? I do just love how much his looming is. I am weaving on a loom like he would not have known. Some real fast looming as well. Yeah, that's some crazy looming.

Speaker: Well, I'm not shocked. That monitor does quick looming. Also. The only people that think Ren Fairs are boring are people that haven't been to a Ren Fair. You don't have to dress up. Just go there and get fucking drunk, dude, and go watch some comedy. It's fucking rad. To be fair, I can understand my tenure. I might find it boring.

Speaker: 38 year old Michael. He can get drones. 38 year old Michael. BF... Neat. He's happy with it. citizen So we don't see that that there's a pig with him. apple in its mouth and homer's got an apple in his own mouth as he's watching it repeat This was why we got the short intro.

Speaker: so oh sorry also just background gag that i spotted i don't know whether anyone else did uh after the knight's duel when marge is holding maggie maggie's giving a thumbs down after the battle Yeah, I didn't notice that.

Speaker: we need to be I need to be better about spotting glum toothpastes. Because i spotted I spotted glum and then since have been the worst one of this show. at spotting the glums of this show the lunch lady Doris is controlling the spit and Homer asks for someone she says her ears are only open to those who speak ye olde English and Homer goes into a full on spiel here again made this is a great Homer's a genius This is a great Homer's a genius bit. It's so funny because he's motivated by food.

Speaker: Yep, so hummus. the sweet maiden spit ground my Now, my boon, that I might sup on suckling pig this noon. do whatever rhymes as well So Homer's eating his pig and he's happy because he's eaten eight different beets and he's a true renaissance man.

Speaker: Let's pop Lisa to say she's going to go get the the plug in the... You old stomachwump. be Your stomach. She comes across. the Please, Chief, we give him who's got his, uh... Friar Wiggum.

Speaker: Yeah, probably wiggling his finger. He's holding like a sort of... Fantastic B -Storm. so lisa goes in and he goes look at all these fabled beasts we then see like a chicken wearing like an afro i love the chicken with the afro is that like because that yeah i saw the the pictures manticore and the any other ones but then he that then Wiggum lists You know the two -headed dog that was born with only one head. the no So...

Speaker: What? Can we have theories? of what the chicken was. is it just dis Is it just the disco chicken? I don't know. Because the thing is... is when I saw the, the like, medieval thing, the medieval... Medieval. The medieval... Monsters.

Speaker: Pictures. I thought it was a cockatrice. But then he starts again, like I said, the two headed dog, blah, blah, blah. So like. It's not a cockatrice. The fuck is it? It's just a rainbow disco rainbow disco chicken. There you go this rainbow disco chicken Boom. I just invented a new fast food place. I'd eat there. Well done.

Speaker: I feel like it needs more of a ye olde name though for a medieval... medieval or mythical creature. Do you know there's actually Fast food places in America that still deliver your food on roller skates? What?

Speaker: Fair enough. We go to a place called Sonic. here. And they they genuinely deliver your food on Rollerblades. where And Sonic is fucking delicious.

Speaker: They're paying for the ones that work. They're onion rings. are worth uh pushing children in traffic

Speaker: That's how you get a MeUndies sponsorship. It's not so... So, yes, we've got the dog that's just a dog and then... we give him two deuces Escort? No, no, no, no, no. It's a two -headed dog. that was born with only one head which is a shame But they're not going to eat it. And then he shows off the Legendary S -Kwax.

Speaker: which is a horse with the head of a rabbit and the body of a rabbit. and The body of a rabbit. I love how obvious the joke is and yet still funny. It hops off. He's like, oh, it's galloping away. It's galloping. And then she's like, here, bunny, bunny, here, bunny, bunny. And he's like, here, Esquilax. So Lisa goes off into the haunted woods, Snow White style, and then that comes across a tent where - I just realized that the name is kind of a pun because Esquire, as in like -

Speaker: Equestria? Equine would be like horse, yeah. Yeah. Equus is like... Equilax? So then lax? I don't know. Again, it's probably Simpsons being really nerdy, like the writers being super nerdy. but There is some mythological creature punnery going on here, yeah, for sure. Absolutely, yeah. I never quite have made that connection myself, but yeah.

Speaker: Sorry, carry on, Michael. ye so Lisa comes across a tent and... There's like a gypsy woman inside and she goes, I've been waiting for you Lisa. And Lisa goes, how did you know my name was? Oh, it's on your name tag. it says hi i'm lady name tag she then asks uh Would you like to know your future? And he says go Lisa says, no, I don't believe in it. I'm going to go. And she goes, what's your hurry?

Speaker: Everyone's watching at the joust and Homer's heckling the puppet show and goes, wow, you could see into the present. just sorry to do a complete random derailment i've opened a simpsons wiki to find escalax and behind the trivia behind the laughter trivia bit says uh According to Bill Giese, I'm not sure how you pronounce that, who assisted in naming many Pokemon, Snorlax derives part of his name from Esquilax. Really?

Speaker: Apparently so. Jesus Christ. That's how much influence it seems to have. No, it doesn't. No it doesn't! It's snore! and relax. fuck off he's just he saw that as an opportunity and bullshitted. No, it isn't. It's snow. and relax because it's a big FA - Sleeping. Pokemon. Fuck off, you liar. I believe in you, Jim.

Speaker: You have never stood me wrong. Sorry I'm getting his LinkedIn bio up so I can see if he worked for Game Freak. Oh, I gotta log into... linkedin no i believe that he i believe you that you read this i just don't i think he's bullshitting i think he's talking Hosh? Yeah, which is why I'm doxing him now so I can find out if he's lying. oh We don't go to the the gypsy showing off the tarot cards and they start with a death card because now the death card is good it means change tradition

Speaker: So this is believed in the cute squirrel. The happy squirrel. The happy squirrel. He's just like, that's bad. He goes, no, they're vague and mysterious. We're revealing the true so so story of your first true love. And Lisa does. Okay.

Speaker: So we don't go, we're going into a universe. I was so tempted to get ah either a tarot reading or my palm read at the Ren Faire. Not because I believe in it. But because I just want to... i wanted to witness it yeah i was gonna say have either of you ever had a tarot reading No, but it was $30. Oh, okay. Now I had one done for free by somebody who was clearly very much learning to do tarot readings earlier this year.

Speaker: One of my best friends, Antonia, does it, and i've i I genuinely... When I get back to England, I'll probably ask her to do it. I'll probably go to her place and just get absolutely fucking mashed.

Speaker: but we then go to then I'll come back onto the podcast. Guys, I have my tarot reading and holy shit, it's real. I won't. Yeah. So we then see that we're going to the futuristic time of 2010.

Speaker: wo yeah i I actually have in my notes, ah, 2010, so far away and distant, just for other reasons now. I fucking love any old bit of media that's predicting the future that has now come to pass. Oh, like the fact that Blade Runner takes place in, um...

Speaker: 2015. Yes, or that The Running Man takes place in 2025. or whatever it was 2015 i don't know uh either way yeah it's anything that's like oh this is what we think the world's going to be like in 10 15 20 30 years and we can now look at it and go oh that's interesting isn't it yeah that's what they thought Yeah, so far from future. So we cut to 2010 and we see what looks like... some robots but it turns out it's just a group of people wanting to audition for the Tin Man in Wizard of Oz.

Speaker: yeah And one person goes, I really can't wait to see that. So. We don't see, but we do get a hologram of a tree, bit which is a memory of a real tree. Yep, as as we all have in the years beyond. The far -flung future of 2010. We have holographic trees, yes. so we then see that the all the leases now walking around shoes Very. Old.

Speaker: I always liked the design of old Elisa, it felt very, like... They clearly thought about it, whereas they never think about the design for Old Bart. You're welcome. Yeah, I did i don't i think they put like min they just make Bart's head bigger.

Speaker: They gave him the Homer beard as well. I thought that was funny, but i think it would I think they should have found a way to give him a receding hairline or something. I mean, presumably that Bart's 25 here. I will get into hairlines in a later scene, but like, it's not unreasonable that Bart would still have hair at 25, you know.

Speaker: Yeah, that's fair. So Lisa goes to the water fountain and smashes her head against the a bulking man and uh He goes first and Lisa declares he is the rudest man that she has ever met.

Speaker: But besides that, I slowly base Snacklecommer down. So we're going to see y 'all. weirdly they got how much soy there would be in the future fairly right um yeah yeah they're on that one this uh this fucking whole episode reminded me of just like it felt like it was kind of making fun of like just rom -coms in general well this oh yeah well you got you got fucking Hugh Grant With the serial numbers filed off. you so and Thank you. That's his name.

Speaker: Jesus Christ. Yeah, because I knew when they called him Hugh, I was like, oh, Hugh Grant. Yes. Yeah. Exactly who they're riffing on here, yes. it is mandy patton mandy pattenkin playing playing him but uh yeah I'm surprised they didn't try to get Hugh Grant to play it. They might have tried and then just didn't.

Speaker: and He was a fairly big movie star at the time. They were getting big stars, though. Yeah, I mean, this was before the scandal, I think. because i think Was there a Hugh Grant scandal? Oh. I think he got caught with prostitutes. I'm imagining this.

Speaker: In the media, libel lawsuits, legal issues, phone hacking expose. a He's got a spicy Wikipedia page. Yeah, so something happened there. I don't know exactly what. Good day, Jeff. So you beat the city. soy pop which has now got gag suppressant

Speaker: that's great he also beats it as he leaves looking angrily as he goes up A very old school lift for the future. Hmm. It's an old school building, isn't it? true so Lisa arrived at the library and she needs the ecosystem of the marsh but unfortunately the last copy has been taken out by hugh parkfield and uh The librarian points it out and Lisa goes, oh no, it couldn't be. So a man wearing the exact same outfit with him, but having a moustache.

Speaker: turns around and leases relief, but then Hugh goes, oh, thank you, Will. I'll leave my book while I tie up my shoe. I think it's so funny how inconsistent this dude's British accent is. I don't think Mandy was there. So Lisa goes to challenges and and says that you'll take care of everything. I can be faster than you, at least it does.

Speaker: I read it at 78th grade level and it's like... Right here. and then What does that mean? What does that mean? What does that mean? ah did The gag is just that reading grade levels just keep going through your life. It doesn't stop once you leave school. You can read at a 78th grade level. I read slow as fuck, so I don't think come i don't think I'm Yeah, no, I'm not a fast reader. no

Speaker: but they'd start reading and it's a full -on competition and they he was off to go get a dictionary then Lisa gives the meaning of the word That's enough for them to decide they're in love, so they start making out passionately. I like where everything goes. i don't understand this at all and then man goes of course not you're a robot of course you don't you're a robot so the robot starts weeping oh this was funny because i think one of the things that makes a Quintessential.

Speaker: Simpsons bit. is how unexpected it is. yeah And because this is just so... Fucking bizarre. And yet... doesn't somehow doesn't feel out of place no so it's the far future of 2010 yeah about t's it's just so it was so funny Both me and Jill were cackling.

Speaker: So I'll be down there a cut to. The... All right. you and Lisa having watched 40 classic films starring Jim Carrey. they they'll talk about I never understood anyone that doesn't understand the magic of Jim Carrey.

Speaker: He can make you laugh by no more than a frantic flailing of his limbs. The thing the thing that I... I picked up on this and this might just be me. But I kind of read the joke as...

Speaker: that Hipsters. will act. Hipster -y. about the most mundane things like oh i like jim carrey but yeah so does fucking most people on the planet you ding dong But I don't know if that is, that that's where the joke went for me in my head. So according to David Merkin, the showrunner, it was a joke about how, you know, in the 90s, Jim Carrey was huge, big actor. um But. he was you know he was a very silly

Speaker: actor he does a lot of very silly roles and yeah as a as a result didn't really garner him much respect as an actor so it's kind of like oh in the future he'll always be his his people will look back on his works and respect him as like this highly acclaimed actor right ok okay no that makes more sense for the 90s because i don't think hipsters were like like there wasn't ah the word hipster yeah i imagine there was there's always been hipsters i was a hipster before hipster even was a word i've been a dickhead since i was born

Speaker: Sure. So I'd be Dr. and Mrs. Dre Hall. Yep, I got a bit of a chuckle at me. Oh, get it. Someone explain. Dr Dre. Обязательно. Dr. Dre paid to have a hall named after him at this university.

Speaker: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa I'm so smart. Thank you. So. Lisa and you were together and... you can't believe how much they have in common as they're both studying the environment. They're utterly humorous about their vegetarianism and they both love the Rolling Stone.

Speaker: But not for their music, for their talisman to disturb. to preserve historic buildings. Is that a - i i part of me like briefly went looking for that and i was like this seems like a futile thing i shouldn't bother wasting my time on but the rolling stone is that a thing rolling stones do i don't know what what what was that doing as a gag i don't know maybe but i think i think again Again.

Speaker: I'm gonna defend my stance of hipsters though. That like, oh, I don't like them their music. I like them for their philanthropy. All right, well, good for you. there is a rolling stones poster in their dorm room as well for the steel wheelchair tour 2010.

Speaker: And they're still going, folks. Jesus Christ, dude. Retire! Retire! That could be said of so many people, but yes. So Hugh invites so Lisa to come to England with him for Parkfield Manor.

Speaker: And Lisa says, can we get vegetarian meals? He goes, of course we can. And then Lisa goes, he yes, because eating animals is wrong. So very wrong. When will the world learn? I don't know. I just don't know. This is interesting because we haven't had Lisa the vegetarian. Yeah, yeah. She's not technically vegetarian. Lisa's vegetarianism has not... been established so i would imagine i would imagine that this episode inspired that it may well be that they're like they were like oh well we've already predicted that lisa will be a vegetarian in the future so let's make that come to pass you yeah sure

Speaker: Do you think they were just using this to put Paul McCartney to get him on the show? Like, see? you See? yeah So we then see that... the They're on the plane and... He was happy that ah it's it's great that we're going back to re -evaluate those wacky old designs. Obviously the plane's got like a ripe of a squeeze thing going on. It's like a biplane but with more layers. It's like a... So strange. Whatever you call it. hex plane.

Speaker: i would say that big ben now has a digital clock which is tough That was funny. No one has reset Big Ben since the last power cut. So we then see that we're at the Parkfield Manor and... Lisa's trying to do proper etiquette, so...

Speaker: they say oh i don't know how we ended up with them and Lisa's like Was that dreaded by British wit, or was that subtle self -pity? And the respondent, he goes, Hehehe. And they like it because that's a boisterous American. for it Advice for Americans talking to Brits. And I think as three British blokes, we can all agree on this. If a British man says something, just laugh. If you don't get it, just laugh.

Speaker: we'll We'll appreciate it. but let's ah analyze that with context if i say to you i've got cancer don't laugh That probably wasn't a joke. Yeah, sure. well No, if you're an American, if you're an American, laugh.

Speaker: Only if you're an American. no I have three weeks to live. I genuinely... i love this this is very incisive because like i genuinely like as a british person did appreciate the british guy going oh i don't know how we ended up with those oh that's good i like that that's yeah that's quite amusing and then followed up with the lisa going i don't get it no i've genuine genuinely because i have so many american friends at this point the amount of times they've been like i can't tell if you're telling a joke

Speaker: Lisa looks at a painting and goes, ah, is that the 17th century? and Nope, that's just Uncle Aldred. he's a He gets his brain medicine. I love the shot of the National Health Service for some reason. You've got to pay for that Medicare.

Speaker: I think we'll see you and Lisa now having a picnic and... Peace out. I know that Americans like fireworks, so we see the fireworks going off and it starts spelling out the longest proposal of all time. Yeah, would you do me the honour of you that the tradition of holy matrimo. And then it cuts out and he cuts to plan b which is just your one B, which is just he's written marry me on a can.

Speaker: What I will note about this scene is ah something that you probably didn't pick up on and I imagine almost nobody picked up on but like since it's noted as a design detail I will will highlight it. They made the sky slightly more red.

Speaker: because they were like, oh, in 2010, the world will be so much more polluted, so it'll make the sky redder. That's funny. Yeah, I just thought it was dusk. Yeah, well, yeah, exactly. Nobody's going to look at that and go, ha ha ha, the pollution. It's like, no, it's that's a sunset. The Simpsons writers are fucking nerds. They really are. I love it, though.

Speaker: maybe that's what's been lost in simpsons like in the later seasons is that don't employ enough fucking nerds Yeah, exactly. Get some nerdy nerds. The two helpers are crying. It's nice Mr. Hugh found true love. They're both crying in their heads, not because they were robots.

Speaker: Yep, sure. Yeah, again, he just got a proper laugh out of me. So Lisa calls home to Marge and Marge gives the advice of an elevator is called the lift. I might as well just call it a kilometer.

Speaker: And botulism is called steak and kidney pie. That's accurate. Ugh. Yo, Jill had steak and kidney pie when she visited this year. She fucking loved it. Steak and kidney's fucking sick.

Speaker: Fair enough. to each their own. I think she had steak and ale. Yeah. Okay, steak and ale. One of these things. Steak and ale's fire. Kidney's got a weird texture. I'm not on board with kidney. Nah, I like steak and kidneys. Steak and kidney's good.

Speaker: Go up. Lisa.

Speaker: I've never heard John disagree with me more harshly than just quietly. No. oh you're telling me that my christmas gift of a shirt t -shirt and steak and kidney pie magazine for john isn't going to go down one bought a steak and kidney pie for the vegetarian well done michael if you bought me steak steak and kidney pie subscription i'd would lick thine anus holy shit would i be happy well subscribe to me pies you know what just swap gifts it'll be fine No, I want my share, sure.

Speaker: I'm not showing up to your wedding at eating a steak and keeping it by in just my fucking underwear. I'll just reveal that's the priest. Yeah! Just point to me, staking kidney just down my chest, go, that's the minister. I was like, hello, dear. Who is he? Oh, it's my Uncle Eldred.

Speaker: yeah I've had too much to drink. Let's keep going. yeah I do like that they managed to accurately predict video calling and also beyond that, that older folks wouldn't have a clue how to use video calling properly. that was cool I mean, older people not being able to figure out new technology is not. Like.

Speaker: That's not even a new bit in Simpsons. Abe Simpson. It's also a rotary. video phone which is awesome oh that's great i mean i think that's like that's just a joke ah England.

Speaker: rather than Like. I don't think it's meant to be incongruous. I think that's a joke at English. people, like rotary phones. i mean i don't yeah i mean my grandma's like a rotary phone because we're old -fashioned i guess would be the way i'd put it possibly So.

Speaker: Lisa reveals that they're engaged. And Marge says, if only your father were here still with us as she looks down sadly. But he went to work a few minutes ago. Because he's been to work. So Lisa says, do you remember when I was little and we were planning our wedding? And you said, well. I'll stop that from ruining it.

Speaker: Marge crosses her fingers and goes, don't worry, I'll go to you, you'll be fine. it that It's a picture phone, Marge. Oh. No, no, I just... I go touch to the... montti The room it is. and lisa goes I like Marge. That feels like Marge trying to be hip. To me.

Speaker: is like calling it the room it is as if like that's yeah i do appreciate the fact that lisa accepted this oh yeah okay when de i just like ah Still pitiful. What is rheumatism?

Speaker: No, let's not. Let's just keep going. Simpsons. Simpsons. Simpsons. Some sort of joint pain. So we go to Bart and there's a zoom in and he's in his shirt and tie and he's like, oh, that's great news about Lisa, but I've got to get back to work.

Speaker: and then we zoom out and we see the bot is wearing sleeveless suit as everyone Everyone in this episode does a great job of playing an older version of themselves other than Bart's voice actress.

Speaker: Oh, they have... I don't think it's easy. I don't think it would be easy. They had to electronically change Nancy Cartwright's voice in order to do older Bart, yes.

Speaker: I do not think it would be easier to do an old an older bar voice. Because Bart, realistically... Kinda sounds like an adult anyway. So it. I'm not saying I'm not like trying to be a dick, but I do think it's like. There's also one other character that doesn't that has ah a weird voice for their older self, but we'll get to that when they show up.

Speaker: but it starts destroying the building they're finally paying me to do this by paying me to do this it's like Bart what did you get up to in college man So we're then cut to the nuclear power plant which is still operating thanks to lengthy appeals process.

Speaker: Which they're on the sign, which is good. sounds about right honestly yeah And we say that everyone's working as their robots, except for when he and Cole are in the boardroom, but Thomas is station. Still there. Still there doing his thing.

Speaker: Except... Copulant. Yep. he is faster than he was i i was wondering what was going on with homer's design in the future because he's got little stripes on his chest uh it took a more looking up than i'm expected to find out that is just The Jetsons, they're doing the Jetsons again. Oh, that's clever.

Speaker: So Milhouse walks in and tells Homer no personal cause, and Homer calls him Mr. Milhouse, which went quite late. Milhouse is bold.

Speaker: Millhouse is 25 and balding real bald. balding Well, his dad is bald, so I was prepared to accept it. i guess so yeah i mean i soon no people do go bald by 25 but like yeah i don't Each bomber guy's like, what, 30? And he's bald. Yeah, yeah It just feels weird when somebody that young has lost that much hair and like Milhouse, it doesn't seem like, you know. A high testosterone kind of character. He works in a nuclear kill power plant.

Speaker: Because I love it. we can We can say one thing. He deserved it. selfie Also, while we're talking, sorry, sorry, sorry. While we're talking about hair and designs, Homer only has one hair left. Yeah.

Speaker: Excellent. so Elmo reveals that, uh... lisa's getting married and millhouse goes my one true love and we cut back to teenage millhouse and Lisa saying, I just don't plan to ever get married. And Milhouse is weeping. He cuts back. Isn't this?

Speaker: Isn't this a running bit of in the future episodes of Lisa breaking up with Milhouse? Yeah, I think they do get married. And him crying. yeah I think so, yeah. So Milhouse then says he's going to go do Homer's performance evaluation. Homer looks quite pleased about this notion. Yeah, Homer does not realise what's about to happen. So we pan down the street of all the futuristic houses and we go to the Simpsons, which is built on wood.

Speaker: Sorry, again, just just me complaining about the fact that they should have done... they should have aged up the characters in The Simpsons. Milhouse would be such a great character to comment on incel culture.

Speaker: I mean... If they'd aged up the characters. Oh, I see. you Like if the characters had continued to age with the show. Yeah, I mean, this has been something we've talked about like a dozen times on the show at this point, that The Simpsons should have kept aging up the characters and eventually become a ah a show about... Springfield.

Speaker: But they didn't. Well... I would... Peace. Millhouse! was a commentary on incel culture before incel culture existed. I mean, yeah, you're not wrong. I think... I'd be interested to see because I know they do a number of other future episodes in the, well... future and definite i can definitely think of at least one instance where millhouse is portrayed in the future who's kind of

Speaker: in ah in a kind of a... I'd say incel adjacent kind of roles. So it'd be interesting to see - There's one of the future where he's a chat as well. Yeah. call Yeah, like like, there's one where he's made made his I don't know if we're thinking of the same one. There's one where he's basically made his entire personality going to the gym because he thinks that's what women want.

Speaker: which I don't know if that's what you were thinking of. yeah what scrawny guy uh what scrawny white guy would suddenly start going to the gym and be really pleased with how much progress he's made who would do that you're allowed to go to the gym just don't make your entire personality I know, I'm just making a joke at my expense.

Speaker: Fair enough. Thank you. I'm taken. In so matter, folks.

Speaker: So we cut to Homer, and Homer says that he's got to call everyone to tell them the good news. He tries to pick up the phone, but he says, Maggie, get off the phone. We see that Maggie's on the phone as an older girl. Is this the beginning of the bit? Because i know I know John brought this up before, but is this the first time we get of Maggie in the future not being able to talk?

Speaker: yeah i think so that day I keep this joke going a while in all these future episodes. Yeah, yeah. I think it's funny. I like it. and it's good i home' responsible I also love Maggie's design. in the future because she she genuinely looks quite old school simpsons and i don't know how to like properly explain that but it's like the length of the hair Yeah, it's like from the Simpsons shorts when it was still a bit like yeah sketchy, I suppose, in terms of character like style.

Speaker: Yeah, because there's no one in Simpsons that has... that long hair. that is also the same colour as their head. Yeah. So I think it's that. She looks like old school Lisa, I guess, would be. Kind of accurate.

Speaker: Yeah, no, I really like a teenage Mackie design. That's fun. I love her design. It's great.

Speaker: So Homer says he's going to plan everything, which includes holding the reception at Moe's. And Dane goes, no, let's have the whole wedding there. Because we can do it on Monday. Do it on a Monday. There'll be fewer drunks. Well, she then pulls out a cord that she's taken out to stop him from planning any aspect of the wedding, which Homer puts in. I love how accepting Homer is of this. This is so good. He's just like, well, yeah, this seems to be in order. I'll be in the hammock. I'll be in the hammock outside. We then see the wedding invitations going out and we see Mrs. Smithers get his plus guest and Smithers goes, well, there's only one person he wants to bring. So he pulls out the drawer of the cryogenically frozen Mr. Boones. He goes.

Speaker: We'll follow you out once we discover the cure for 17 stab wounds. 17 stab wounds. I love the fact... It's so... It genuinely props to the writers how they found ways to feature as many... characters.

Speaker: in the future as possible because then this was The - Perfect way to feature Dr. Frank. so there's lots of things working on it and he's up for 15. We're up to 50. He doesn't look much different in the future, it's going to be said. He's got a hunch.

Speaker: Yeah. Does he not normally hunch a little bit anyway? Not as extreme. He looks like a Simpsons character normally. In this he looks like he has a hunch. like We cut to Skinner getting his invitation and we see that the classroom is absolutely piled with kids on top of each other. and though Miss Hooper's not actually teaching, it's just...

Speaker: A TV screen and Troy McClure is on the screen. in his Star Trek uniform. And Pepsi presents addition and subtraction. So he did ask one kid the thing and we go through the kid in the shop in the Chicago system whose answer is Pepsi and gets partial credit. Yeah, if if you if you have two Pepsis and take away one Pepsi, how refreshed would you still be? that's The girl in California with the red hair.

Speaker: Pepsi. Pepsi? Partial credit! So Skinner then reveals to Miss Hoover they've been invited to the wedding of the only student that can read at an adult level.

Speaker: And Miss Hoover says, well, that must be Lisa because Martin Prince died in the science fair explosion. So we come down to the basement and Martin's got a full on Phantom of the Opera thing going on. He's like, he starts playing Fifth of Beethoven on an electronic keyboard. an electronic organ well thank you very much is amazing so here here's the second character with an incongruous voice because He is very clearly not voiced by the usual actor for Martin Prince. And that...

Speaker: fascinates me. but Why? Why? Because Martin Prince is, it's not like he's a guest actor. He's a very common actor in the show.

Speaker: So. Why? Because he was in a horrible science fair accident which changed his voice. ah Maybe, maybe that is the reason. I'm genuinely curious.

Speaker: This isn't like a - Oh, for the bit! This is a... i want to look behind the curtains yep he didn't quite perish but uh some days he wish he had so he talks in a mournful voice off the top of my head i couldn't tell you who normally voices martin but apparently it is dan castellaneta doing it in this episode so i don't i don't think he normally does martin i'm gonna be honest i don't think so yeah martin's played by a woman i think

Speaker: ah Most of the kids are played by women because... the Yeah. the The kids here. Voices haven't broken, so... God. get all the men to play it. So Hugh and Lisa arrive at the airport and to the auto cab company.

Speaker: And Mayor Quimby is driving the car, and Mayor Quimby tries to pass himself off as Mohamed Yaha for. it doesn't quite It doesn't quite work because... Otto calls me because he's coming to get his indicted ass. for the convention center and good because i cut the ribbon on that convention center Russie Taylor.

Speaker: voices ah martin Martin Prince. she is She has passed, sadly. She voiced Martin Prince until... ah Season 30. One. Just to remind you that there's that many scenes, there's that many, uh... Fucking...

Speaker: Seasons of the Simpsons. She was 75. Yeah, this podcast didn't go in anywhere, folks. She voices Sherry, Terry, Martin, Prince, Wendell, Borton, Uta, Zorka. Why do all the names sound like this? Ian, Lewis Clark, Martha Prince, Sidney Swift.

Speaker: and Lisa Simpson. in Moonshine River. God, when she died, like, presumably they had to replace half the cast. That's not... I was going to say that's not that many... recurring characters. Well, it sounds a bit like when the South Park actress died that did all the female things. By the time they replaced that, they had the...

Speaker: well Like, all of the characters I just listed aren't, like, regularly occurring characters, other than maybe Martin Prince. Like, Martin Prince appears more than Sherry and Terry. sure you don't know how often they come up in season 31 when they've completely run out of ideas though This is true. Oh, she also voiced fucking Pebbles in Flintstones. oh just i i just thought that was cool because i you know I liked Flintstones. Who's ready for a Sherry and Terry episode? and and Oh, she voiced fucking Minnie Mouse.

Speaker: oh fuck okay holy shit rest in peace russie taylor all right cool right back to simpsons yeah so lisa starts hyperventilating as they get close to the house and hugo's I'm sure though. I love the, um sorry, like when they're driving, I love the the Jetsons.

Speaker: car noise. They're like... meaning need be be b baby that brick genuinely Really fucking amused me. If you tell Lisa not to worry, that's to show if I'll get along as long... as long as they're not squatting in a ditch fucking berries and lisa goes and if they are And if they are...

Speaker: so we don't see that the simpsons are making an effort as they fly the british flag and unfortunately isn't he a like a but sorry i just because i could relate to to lisa in this moment because i'm fairly certain Um...

Speaker: When Jill was about to meet my parents or was like preparing to meet my parents uh she said something that's like as long as they're not horribly racist And I was like... And if they are? my My parents are not racist. They're just very ignorant people. Mm hmm.

Speaker: Love you, Mom and Dad. I'm in the same boat. better yeah i could yeah yeah relate we we yeah most of us lived most of our lives in the north of england all of our parents are ignorant Mm hmm.

Speaker: so everybody gets out the car though Marge gives Lisa a hug and Homer shouts over to you. here's a bit of US hospitality for you and we then see that the UK flag is on fire and You and a part of Nigel Farage die together.

Speaker: That's it. ah Lisa pointed out and they pulled down the flag and they put it out with compost. They stamp on it first. yeah then they how about hands it to Hugh's hands and uh He was still crying because it's still still warm. At least the hyperventilates a bit more.

Speaker: and then homo introduces them to their bedroom which here he built and finds out that if the building inspector comes it's not a room it's a window box at least at least i thank you for being wonderful and you guys i did like actually yeah how everyone's house is like super futuristic but homer's isn't because he insisted on building it himself yeah And all the parts just look like they're basically taped onto the side of the house.

Speaker: So Mew tells Lisa not to worry because he's willing to go through it anything for her. He then falls through the floor. Even the floor. He goes through anything and he falls through the floor. Lisa asks if he's okay and he goes, I'm fine. The competency broke his floor.

Speaker: Oh, and he goes, can you rub me a bath? We didn't see the family eating around dinner and March has to tell everybody, you know. Company eating rules is the... Oh, you look horrified. Yeah, they all start eating really fancy. Maggie, for some reason, I mean, I guess...

Speaker: consistent somewhat with her character being kind of like teenage punk is like for some reason throwing the horns while yeah I saw that. That's real weird. Okay. So Bob reveals his career, which is wrecking ball, crushing cars into cubes.

Speaker: and promoting local top man competitions but he's getting it all i was gushing out till he goes to law school you but i don't think you're going to law school dude no but it says have you heard all the american jokes which includes pull my finger and he's like oh yeah so we know that from mr simpson because i said boy i think Yeah.

Speaker: so Marge says they're off to the wedding fitting and uh Ask Maggie if she wants to come. Maggie's about to talk it and then Marge scolds her. talking with a mouthful. And then. almost tells you they'll take him out and uh Lisa's like, nah, he shouldn't take it. He should take it easy because of his fall. He goes, oh, don't worry, Lisa. The only thing bruised is my spine. let's do it because i only want one thing in return he goes what Pull my finger.

Speaker: Yeah. So how about to make Q feel at home drives on the left side of the road? Hmm. which was a terrifying i i think i've told this story on the on the podcast before but when this was yonkies ago When my family went on holiday to France, I was like six.

Speaker: And we were driving. and after about I genuinely like... Three minutes or something of driving. I said to my mum, out loud. Are we on the wrong side of the road? And she just fucking SWERVED back into the correct side of the road. And that was...

Speaker: Oh, that was so funny. Like... ah At the time, I didn't find it funny because I was six, but looking back, it just gets funnier. so we don't see it that everybody's in most which equals the 1500 cable channel, which is like a big tune.

Speaker: there's a massive fucking pipe coming out the wall plugged into the TV. So Cain Brockman reveals that the following celebrities have been invested, which includes Dr. Brad Pitt. yeah Dr. Brad Pitt.

Speaker: And have a lucky day. Fort Inesky remains at large and is considered dangerous. Do you think they're like slightly changed that like put Dr. Brad Pitt and hecklet he Heather Blah blah.

Speaker: so that it's not liable. I don't know. I mean, Brad Pitt's not a doctor, but in the future, who knows? That's what I'm saying, is that they put... Because they then Brad Pitt can't be like, hey, you insulted me.

Speaker: They could be like, well, we didn't. We insulted Dr. Brad Pitt. Well, I think that would be part of it, yeah. There's also the Baldwin Brothers gang on there. Well, I mean, Alec Baldwin should be in prison, but, you know, let's not get political on this show.

Speaker: there's this is another one of those freeze frame thing kind of bits where there's just like ah a screen full of gags but you do need to stop the thing to see it otherwise you'll miss it there's john john john kennedy George Burns.

Speaker: Infamous Amos grandson of Sam, The artist formerly known as and the Prince Symbol. miserable So presumably just Prince. Tim Allen Jr. Senator and Mrs. Dracula.

Speaker: They do like a good job. Oh, Sideshow Ralph Wiggum is on there. no Yeah. Martha Hitler. Well, you know. Good nachos, Mr. Hitler.

Speaker: And Johnny Neutrino. I saw the Neutrino and I was like, did they put Jimmy Neutron on this? I was like, there's no way because Jimmy Neutron had come out to like 2005. No, it's Johnny Neutrino.

Speaker: I assumed that was a reference. I was like, oh, I didn't even pick up that, like, that wasn't even the right name or... And it was 10 years too soon. Well, they were prescient. What can we say? Yeah, they predicted Jimmy Neutron was a bastard. They predicted Jimmy Neutron ten years earlier.

Speaker: I did like Southchester's Ralph Wiggum because it's like... Again, finding ways to feature as many characters as possible so oh by the way This is where Ralph Wiggum is.

Speaker: A celebrity working for Christopher Clamp and also apparently arrested. Yeah, he is a - he is a - A sideshow clown for Krusty. and he has now done something illegal.

Speaker: The implication is that all celebrities are illegal here. If you see any celebrities, consider them dangerous. What does that mean? Who knows? The first celebrity is in that movie. but Kent Brockman's a celebrity.

Speaker: No, don't trust it. Don't trust Kent Brockman then. Fair enough. So Hugh says he quite likes the pub and Mo goes, oh, you're British. You know, we saved your ass in World War II. And he goes, well, we saved your ass in World War III.

Speaker: and That's true. I mean, America's doing its dumbest right now. Oh, I don't wanna have to save their asses. I don't think we're capable of serving anybody's asses. I'm being brutally honest.

Speaker: We then see that Homer tells Hugh that... to He's got a bit of a family tradition in that his dad gave him some cufflinks and they've always brought him good luck. Yes. then he would still carry on the tradition and uh hugh sales he would be honored and then we see that like It's all pink. Horrific.

Speaker: Ugly pig complex, yeah. So Hugh says he will wear those, and I was like, ah. Bart is playing virtual pool and the man behind him is playing virtual darts and throws a virtual dart which hits Bart. they don't seem to have a virtual fight having a virtual fight and Mo has like a high -pitched thing to break up the fight and we just see them both arriving in pain Yep.

Speaker: So I'm going to marge her in bed and marge boys out that box. turned into hardcore sex This is a ga - Like. This isn't accurate. But it is still weirdly prescient that Fox News became like slowly became a very hard right show over time that no one noticed.

Speaker: Hmm. There's also one of those important gags that I blank turned into blank so gradually i didn't even notice yes just quite regularly used now almost says it's nice to have everybody under the under one roof and he never realized on what he listened to so listen to the moves in the next house smash of life they smash us on the wall and tell them to keep it down and uh march says yes I'm sorry I let you left you alone. He was just there. He had a nice time. Lucy goes, what happened to that gash on your forehead? do it

Speaker: Oh, that's when we hid in the dumpster after the fire alarm went off in the pornographic centre.

Speaker: Use a story. everything will be fine let's go to sleep because we've got a big day then they turn off the lights Lisa goes to sleep and we see Hugh looking fretting Yeah, I like how he says a very a very big... Long. day. Yep.

Speaker: so we didn't uh Cut to the the wedding preparations. under Lisa says she feels a bit weird wearing white because of Milhouse and Marge. Milhouse doesn't count. I'm fairly certain this is a recurring gag as well.

Speaker: Yeah. Lisa goes through all the things that she's got, which include... ah something old which is the necklace something new which is the wedding dress Something borrowed is the brooch. And he goes, I need something blue. And Marge cuts off a piece of her hair. And she's like, ah.

Speaker: it's very sentimental it's very cute it's very cute so we cut to the tent being set up but it's next to the power plant river which ah involves... The fish with three eyes. Okay. weird A cow?

Speaker: And then press a shrink fish. Oi! Bart sees Lisa in her wedding dress and... It says, You make me want to get married for the third time.

Speaker: and he says to he might marry the exotic dancer from Hugh's bachelor party and Lisa's like, we didn't have one. like we had one in his honor Then Bart just goes... Hi, how's it going? I went to a strip club. And then cut to Huey producing... Homer to his parents and... This is very apprehensive about it. haven gone You know, it was great.

Speaker: Octopussy. I've seen that movie twice. And he goes. yeah that's all right yeah yeah i like it that's not too bad thank god he could have very here just sort of thank god he didn't say something worse than that We don't see Patty, so I'm walking and Patty says... if Mrs. Krabappel gets in the way of the bouquet. She'll be wearing the hat.

Speaker: then we see burns coming in and he's being very tentative saying i'm not fully defrosted Smith goes, don't worry, sit down. Smith tries to put him in a chair. He breaks completely. off and Which is what it refers to us.

Speaker: We have a little situation here. Because I can't feel anything under my cummerbund. So we don't see Homer checking in on Lisa and Homer goes, you look great. And then Helmer starts coming into this really nice speech about how he thinks Lisa's the best thing that's ever happened to him.

Speaker: And ah she could pin her own diapers and... see it made him a better of but I helped him understand his wife better and told him to be a better person. Lisa has to point out that. Oh, you're babbling, he goes. See, you're still helping. Lisa then noticed that Homer is wearing the cufflinks and Homer's like Did you forget to give them to him? And I was like... No.

Speaker: like I found him on his nightstand, but I just assumed he didn't want to wear it. Don't worry about it. But that makes sense. You've been going on about them all week. I'm sure you've just forgotten. Lisa goes in to see Hugh who... obviously did not forget he didn't actually want to wear them in front of his parents and his friends and The Lisa. But she says. gets him to wear them and he says he's found the whole thing trying and he's trying to enjoy the family on a personal level, on an ironic level.

Speaker: as a novelty. as As a cautionary example. But nothing works and he's quite pleased when they'll go back to England and never have to deal with him again. at least it's like we'll never see them again he goes well your mother might come for the children And Lisa goes, I don't want to be cut off from my family. But Lisa, you're better than them. you You look like a flower that grew up out there.

Speaker: And Lisa goes, that's a horrible thing to say. Then Hugh points out that you complain about them more than anybody. Lisa goes, I love them. I don't think you to understand that. Lisa hands him back the ring and then walks off. So Maggie's about to sing. amazing grace and uh That's what it says.

Speaker: she's a hellion but she has a great voice she's about to sing but then hugh comes in and goes the wedding's been called off Everyone looks very sad, including very old Christy. Christy is so ancient now.

Speaker: So we get Nelson Sr. laughing and Nelson Jr. laughing. I saw something that said Krusty's supposed to be based on Groucho Marx in this. That kind of makes sense. yeah so Bob Joyce says this wouldn't have happened if it had been inside the church. and then yeah it's in instead of in this like up what is he oh what does he say about nature the Exaggerated splendor, Nick. The cheap showiness of Nick. That's it. ya ya Yeah, yeah.

Speaker: So Lisa walks out of the tent looking very sad and we fade back to the present. where the woman reveals that she went back to England and she never saw him again and Lisa's like The fiancé tarot card. Yep. At least that's if you can change any of this in. This. No, but I'm surprised!

Speaker: So Lisa says, if I thought you were going to show tell me about my true love. Well, you'll have a true love, but... I just like foretelling the relationship, but you get juked around. She then does a smoke bomb. But then he's just there. but it's still just there at least it backs away slowly The Escalac jumps into Lisa's arms and Lisa returns him to the tent.

Speaker: And then Helmer finds her and goes, you missed the most incredible thing. And then Lisa hugs him and goes, I ate seven pounds of fudge. This was so cute. I hated this. This was so cute. I loved it. It was great. It is pretty sweet. Almost much excitedly tells Lisa White's day, which is that he rode the teacups, felt a bit sick, but then he got back into them.

Speaker: Yep. and that's how the episode ends and then we get a bardcore theme tune outro which was great but and yes and and yeah And a slightly tweaked Gracie themes thing as well. Yeah.

Speaker: There is such a... strange contrast to these like cute family moments of Simpsons that hit you like... right in the feels. But, like...

Speaker: right next to deflated Krusty in a wheelchair. And a snapped in half defrosted Mr Burns.

Speaker: It's okay. If anyone deserved to be snapped in half, it's Mr. Burns. This is true. This is true. I'll call it a senior spellbagger. Senior Spielberg. El Diablo. Yeah, he's El Diablo. He doesn't like Mr. Burns. He's just willing to take his money.

Speaker: out we all if senor spielberger likes anyone it's just palito

Speaker: It's very good. It's very good.

Speaker: Cool, what do we think about this episode? Uh, I... I thought it was fun I think it's you know I think Is this the first future? episode yeah i thought so yeah i think it was good i think it sets like kind of a precedent because obviously lisa's design is fairly consistent throughout future episodes.

Speaker: Yeah, I thought it was fun. I can't like... Really say it's when I remembered? I... I genuinely don't know if I ever saw this one before. But I will give it...

Speaker: a Jetsons car noise out of Homer. eternally satisfying. Fair enough. Michael, what do you make of it? I like them all. I think there's a few.

Speaker: funny moments isn't this a nice Cool concept. at least for the first time, of seeing The Simpsons in the future. I'm going to give it a melting head out of over. So expected, but you do appreciate it. Yeah.

Speaker: Yeah, I... definitely like have fun with the future format like i love As I say, I love anything that's predicting. what the future will be like X years from now and seeing how that actually stacks up against reality. just like one of my favorite things to do.

Speaker: so I love that in memory of a real tree thing, that was - that hit right in the oh noes.

Speaker: You think we're going to memorialize the trees? No. Hits as well. I liked the trees before they were gone.

Speaker: We should put a hologram in the Sycamore Gap.

Speaker: That's what will solve it. Go to the virtual apple orchard. Yeah, no, it's definitely, yeah, it's one of the sappy, sentimental family episodes, which is a little, I think a little lighter on the humour than... many of the others but i think they're doing something fun with the format they're trying something a bit different and it works well yeah a decent time I think it only really gets sappy towards the end, but i I definitely think it's one of, it's it's a Matt episode, I think is what I would. I mean...

Speaker: I gave it a happy squirrel out of Homer because it was vague and mysterious. Ooh. Just like you. Oh, thanks. Didn't have anything to say about society.

Speaker: I think a smarter man than me could think of what this says about society but honestly it felt more like a riff on like films like Bridget Jones which wasn't even out yet. Hmm.

Speaker: Like it really did feel like a riff on rom -coms and nothing more. again it had like the jokes about you know we're going to destroy the planet and those kind of things but I don't know if this is just the millennial in me, but those jokes are so common that they don't feel like...

Speaker: You know like certain jokes feel like a call to action? Jokes about climate change don't feel like a call to action, they more feel like quiet resignation. but Yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah, so, I mean, i you know I... I... I don't think it had a lot to say about society. in my opinion No. It just kind of felt to me like we were just... redoing a 90s rom -com movie yeah absolutely felt like a john hughes film Hmm.

Speaker: I mean when you're doing something that's literally set in the future like Risky. That's not kind of not the kind of episode that can be making a commentary on the present to any great extent. Yeah, absolutely. I think the one thing that stood out to me is like definitely eyebrow raising in terms of like visions of the future and what would come to pass is Kent Brockman is

Speaker: The new station that he works for is CNNBCBS. just like Yeah, that's clever. That's clever. Medium mergers into one giant conglomerate. And it's like, oh yeah, no, that's... Fuck yeah, we're doing that. that' That's the thing that's happening. Yep. One big media blob that does all of the stuff. Yep. Yeah. yeah Guys the present is a hellscape.

Speaker: That was the most prescient future hellscape that they got with this one. They haven't yet come to predict. President Donald J. Trump. Guys, do you want to move to Hawaii? No, that's in America.

Speaker: Alright. They won't let me in. Just pick another island. Sorry.

Speaker: Let's make our own island, like fucking Lex Luthor in that Superman movie. With blackjack and hookers. Yeah! Forget the whole thing. Let's call the whole thing off.

Speaker: cool well this was a wildly unproductive couple of episodes that had fuck all to say about shit Yeah. It said dick about fuck. Yeah. okay cool i'm glad we spent two hours and 20 minutes establishing that ah I'm not drinking rum on this podcast ever again.

Speaker: promote some shit, Matt. What's going on? uh the new episode all for arnold came out a month ago the episode where we recorded twins we probably and annoyingly as much as i did want to get more rapz episodes out this year we probably won't get one out until next year because I'm not recording while I'm in America because I don't have a decent setup and I'm not so i'm not standing in my booth.

Speaker: for an hour, like an hour and a half while we talk about. Fucking... kindergarten cop or toll recall or whichever it is. I'm not doing that. So... Yeah, that's out at the end of this month. 31st of October, the first...

Speaker: Actual video game that I am voice acting in is Out. Spooky Tales. You can go play the demo. Right. Fucking now and I'm in it. And it's hilarious. Bye. Fucking love it. It's so fun. If you are an American and you had a huge fan, if you were a huge fan of Tales from the Crypt.

Speaker: You will like this video game. I'm in it! Go play it and give it a specific Steam review that says, yo, Matthew Adam Dixon was fucking rad. Give him money. What else do I do?

Speaker: Every Saturday and Sunday, I stream over on Alzarath's channel. We're playing Baldur's Gate right now. That's really fun. Honestly? I'm a little drunk, so I'm just going to say I love Alzarath. He's amazing, and he's one of the - most funny people and - Ever, if he wasn't such a fucking contrarian.

Speaker: Yeah, and I also do this really dumb podcast called fucking... More Man in the Morning. Go check that out. You might have heard of it. Give us money on Patreon and I'll do something stupid. but I am the clown of this podcast. That's why I'm here. That's why John keeps me around. I'm the one that says a controversial shit. that says dumb shit, that says weird shit. That's what I'm here for. So if you don't... If someone donates £100...

Speaker: This is a promise. If someone donates £100 in one donation... If they give a hundred pounds, I'll... Posing my me undies. There you go. That's my fucking pledge. There you go. Enjoy Okay. Can we do that on Patreon or do we need to set up an OnlyFans for that one? I'll set up an OnlyFans. I've been tempted to do it for ages. I've been working out. I go to the gym. I'm fucking hot now.

Speaker: Holy shit. So yeah, someone else promote before I say something stupid. Michael, what's going on? Yep, you can follow me at... the Blue scary at bottom mash horse, if you feel so inclined.

Speaker: We've already plugged the... Patreon earlier in the podcast, though. we need to come with an app We need to come up with an actual like Patreon plug. I'll write something. Of course, we are based on YouTube and we are also based...

Speaker: on ah Apple Play and Spotify, I still believe. Yeah, it's all in the old places. Anyway, you can get a podcast, typically. yeah that thank you for your support we love it um please do feel free to comment and engage If you like and subscribe, that helps us a lot.

Speaker: You don't have to give us money, but... We won't stop you. and yeah yeah We won't say no to the free money. It's all very much appreciated. John. Cool. ah Find me on Blue Sky, marooka .bsky .social.

Speaker: where I post. Things about Simpsons. the post things about crash up post things about. Stuff I'm interested in and how the world's fucked. Uh...

Speaker: I post, occasionally, a bit. I'm interesting sometimes, I swear, honestly. John is one of the most interesting people I know. i'm just gonna point I posted a bunch about... one of Yorkshire's most Infamous bros.

Speaker: earlier this week because i learned some things about him um He's fascinating. All the cryptid? Yeah, my cryptid. Yeah! Humphrey Smith was my cryptid. Humphrey Smith is like... the most insane human being to have ever lived like the more i learn about him the weirder he gets and somebody came into our workplace this week. and imparted new stories unto me and i was delighted with everything i learned about him He's great.

Speaker: Favourite one there, he doesn't believe in the postal service, he sends his letters understamped so the recipient has to pay the postage but he includes an IOU for the value of the stamp so you're not out of pocket. It's insane. What a fucking lad.

Speaker: He's... I keep using present tense like he didn't die. He died earlier this year. He died in July. Oh, what? What a fucking downer. Yeah, he was he was... Very old. So yeah, hardly unsurprising, but yeah, one of one of. one of the drinks industry's strangest characters.

Speaker: RIP to an Unreal one. Ripped to a cryptid. Yeah, absolutely. Anyway. that's That's enough rambling and diversions. We will see you next time.

Speaker: Bye. Bye. Bye everybody.