Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
Ep. 56 The Road North
97 Plays2 years ago
It's strange how easy it is to find even more reasons to keep fighting when it would just be so easy to be let to exist. To not spend so much time and energy on "fixing" this world. But I see my friends, and I want the world to be a bit brighter for them.. and I see these goblins.. they deserve to be able to thrive.. I'm getting oh so very tired after all these years with no end to the madness of the world in sight.. But doing the right thing is often the most difficult path to take..
Recommended
Transcript
Reflecting on Fighting for a Better World
00:00:04
Speaker
previously on the hired swords. It's strange how easy it is to find even more reasons to keep fighting when it would just be easier to be let to exist. To not spend so much time and energy into fixing this world. But I see my friends and I want the world to be just a little bit brighter for them. And I see these goblins and they deserve to be able to thrive.
00:00:32
Speaker
And I'm getting, oh so very tired, after all these years with no end to the madness of the world in sight. But doing the right thing is often the most difficult path to take.
Introduction with Humor: Hired Swords 2022
00:01:11
Speaker
You're listening to the Hired Swords, a podcast with funny quips before the episode begins, much like this one.
00:01:32
Speaker
Hello, everybody, and welcome to another episode of The Hired Swords. Our first recording of 2022. I would like to welcome my good friends here at the virtual tabletop, starting with Blaze playing Krigs. Hello, he says. Derek is here. He is Davin. I am Davin. I mean, in a sense, yes. And then also Mikey plays Joxer. You found me. I'm right here.
00:02:02
Speaker
Ash is Gwendolyn. Howdy, my lady. Tips chipmunk.
00:02:07
Speaker
I don't know how to do it because I realized I didn't have a hat. Tips chipmunk instead of your hat. That's good stuff. That's really good stuff. All right. Well, welcome you guys back. Let's just do a quick recap of kind of the beginning of this season here since we've kind of had a happy new year and a Mary swordsmas.
Changes in Wild Hill and New Adventures
00:02:28
Speaker
Mary swordsmas. Mary happy. Happy Mary. That's good. I hope everybody had a Mary swordsmas. Did you guys have a Mary swordsmas?
00:02:37
Speaker
Definitely did. Yeah, a little too much traveling, but I'm happy to be healthy and alive. I went nowhere, so I'm cool. Wow. Yeah, mine was truly relaxing. It feels like life. Right? Yeah, mine was truly relaxing. I enjoyed it. I had good times. So yeah, last we left off. Well, the last kind of beginning of season two, before the little break we had, we kind of came into a little bit slightly changed Wild Hill with a
00:03:07
Speaker
Local government of leaders trying to put together a town that looked more like a normal town. Instead of a town full of hunters going on adventures, they're trying to put together something that makes a little more sense. Our party here decided they were going to head to the untouched lands. They did meet up with Hurley and discovered that there was something to this necklace that Tomba was wearing and they
00:03:33
Speaker
Sure enough, went and found another necklace identical to it around the chief's neck. Daven put one of those on. The other one, the chain was broken, was not able to be worn, so Joxer did not put it on. Later, Daven tried to remove it and was unable to do so. He just decided it wouldn't be a very good idea. Just suddenly he decided, I don't think I want to. And so from there, they did finally leave and headed towards the north
00:03:58
Speaker
towards the north of the woods where they fabled untouched lands are.
Visit to Giss's Goblin Village
00:04:03
Speaker
They traveled for about a day until they came to a village that turned out to be Giss's Goblin Village, where he lived with his family, Teld and his mother, and he welcomed them with open arms. They came and enjoyed
00:04:19
Speaker
a night in the tavern, a nice night in the huts that are very lovely and very kind of chic for these rich hunters that come. They kind of found out what this goblin village was all about, which was breeding these creatures to be easily huntable by rich, noble men and women who had no experience hunting. And so this was kind of a hunting farm, so to speak. And the goblins were kind of forced to do this.
00:04:46
Speaker
Well, they had kind of had a sense of their own freedom because Darnaldi, who was in charge there, was no longer around. And his right-hand man, Carmen Stone, had been kind of run off by the hired swords already as well. So knowing, understanding this, the hired swords took it upon themselves to look through Darnaldi's house. They found some items, including a small box.
00:05:11
Speaker
that took a little bit of deciphering to get unlocked and opened. When they finally got it open, they found that this box contained a small map that looked like it had some kind of plainer, plainer mythology or plainer storytelling going on.
Discovery of a Mysterious Map
00:05:27
Speaker
And on this map, someone, assumedly, darn all the had scrawled notes on it, looking for an entrance to something, whether it be the wilds, the, the,
00:05:40
Speaker
they were possibly looking for the shadow wilds that was on there and greater glintry and all that was kind of all listed on this on this little map and with some other notes. So then that night there is an attack and this attack comes out of the shadows and literally it is these shadow creatures who they later find had been summoned by the shadow possessed
00:06:05
Speaker
body of Teld, who had become a different creature after having been killed by Joxer weeks, months ago.
Battle Against Shadow Creatures
00:06:12
Speaker
He had now been reanimated by this mist, this fog that is of this shadow that is now creeping its way towards the wilds and gave them a pretty good run for their money, knocking Joxer unconscious, depleting, depleting Krigs of his strength and weakening him to the point of possible death barring a
00:06:35
Speaker
a saving miracle really from someone from their past. And then finally they're able to defeat Teld after quite the long drawn out battle. And finally go lick their wounds, rest the next morning or late that morning into the afternoon, wake up and join the goblins on a celebration for their survival to where the goblins honored them and kind of threw a little party.
00:07:04
Speaker
And the party was ending and winding down the little show that the goblins had been putting on to celebrate these hired swords had ended and the fire is trickling out and starting to fade and hired swords. Are you just going to retire for the night or what will you be doing as this party has pretty much ended? Most of the goblins have started to head off to go to bed. I think Gwendolyn would look around the group. So how should we be going soon or
00:07:35
Speaker
I think it'd be best if we, uh, if we did leave and continued on tomorrow. I love this place. I just, I think we should move and morning sounds good. Yeah. First thing I think we could use good night's rest.
00:07:52
Speaker
Yeah, I think after we get a rest, after this meal and drinks, it's time. It's been nice here, but there's been a couple of memories I don't want to relive. And I was ready for bed quite a while ago, actually. I was just being polite staying up. I think the earlier we can get to bed, the faster we can get on the road. All right. So you guys are just going to head back to the huts, sounds like? Yeah.
00:08:21
Speaker
Yeah, our little commune, I guess. Yeah, Krigs, are you doing anything different? Or are you just going to go with everybody? I'm going with everybody, but I don't feel particularly talkative at this moment. I'm still impressed by what I've seen from the goblins and what they were able to perform and everything, and just the livelihood that I've seen even within a day and a half, two days, however long we've actually been here.
00:08:47
Speaker
from the moment we got here to now, just the change that I've experienced, it's kind of awe-inspiring, but I'm also just so tired of what could potentially be ahead. Having walked into this and seen Teld and seen the shadows, I'm happy to see the change, but so daunted about what could potentially be ahead. Okay.
Krigs's Secret: Giss's Romance
00:09:13
Speaker
Make a perception check as you walk towards the hut.
00:09:15
Speaker
Okay, I'm gonna roll my fancy new dice. Thanks Christmas That is a 17 plus I forget that you know character sheets are real and exist in this world So let me pull mine up to actually have it pulled up to see you how it affects your your life. Yeah, so it's 18. Oh great
00:09:40
Speaker
So you see guess standing over by one of those tables and he's kind of looking at you with a look a little bit of a shameful look in his face and and It's like he wants to get your attention, but he's not you know that look of like hey I kind of want to talk to you, but I don't know if I should or whatever is not you specifically Krigs
00:10:01
Speaker
I'm not going to really say anything to the rest of the party. They're kind of just walking and I hear them talking to the monks themselves and whatnot. And I'm going to kind of break off and not be sneaky, but just, you know, break over towards Gis and kind of stroll over. Okay. You walk up and he goes, Oh, hi. Sorry. I just needed to apologize. I saw you in Darnaldi's.
00:10:27
Speaker
Did, did you see me? Uh, no. And I mean, I guess you have nothing to apologize for. I mean, listen, okay. So there's this girl that usually is, well, I'm trying to impress her. So I told her we could go in there and hang out. And well, I heard you out there and was afraid Darnaldi was back.
00:10:52
Speaker
When I saw you, I just kind of turned and ran back in the bedroom and pretended like nothing happened. So I'm sorry. I just she's the shopkeeper's daughter and it's it's a big thing that nobody's supposed to know. And anyway, I'm just apologize. OK, guys, first things first. Details. No, I'm kidding. I don't think you I don't think you really want that.
00:11:15
Speaker
Yeah, let's respect privacy. Let's not kiss and tell. Well, let's not guess and tell. If you... That was solid. That was good. Too good. I have to say, you may have a future in some of the roguish arts. I had no idea you were there, frankly. I was a little bit trying my best to be sneaky as well.
00:11:41
Speaker
I was just afraid that you were gonna see me and were a fan that you thought I was buying on you or something for dirty but it was nothing like that there was she she was in there and i didn't want. Anyone to catch us and anyway it until my mom now that my mom settle down maybe we can make it a real relationship right now it's kind of secret event.
00:12:02
Speaker
I just, it's a whole big thing. I just don't want to make it worse. I mean, not necessarily. I just... Trying to put in a good word for you? Just don't tell me about it. You're looking for a wing dwarf? No, just don't tell anybody. Just don't tell anybody. Just don't tell anybody. Okay, your secret is safe with me, Giz. I appreciate you...
00:12:22
Speaker
Addressing better side I said, I mostly just didn't want you to think I was trying to like, I don't care what you were doing in there. I just, it wasn't what I thought you might think it was, you know, and it's awkward. I get it. I mean, I'm gonna go back home. I mean, I could say the same. I mean, Devin, it's
00:12:39
Speaker
I'm assuming you saw us both of us there. We were just, you know, sneaking around. Don't worry about it. I'm not worried about it. I don't care what you could burn that place down for all I care. Just while it's there, I thought I'd use it to get some points. Yeah, yeah, she.
00:12:57
Speaker
Give your mom your best wishes from us and again Thank you so much for the hospitality we've had here. It's been it's been incredible Vail that that goblin is something to be reckoned with let me tell you and I do believe At least I hope we'll be able to stop back through before too long. It's it's been pleasant I I do think we will be leaving tomorrow. Yeah that
00:13:24
Speaker
That's great. Well, Kevin Vale and I have started talking about what we might do if Darnaldi comes back. I don't think we're just going to bend over backwards for everything he wants anymore. So I think we could do something about it. Maybe we're going to try. You guys said something to us about if we all just stand up. And I don't know. I think if we can convince enough goblins here to do that, then we won't have to be their animal farmers anymore. Look, Gis, you and all goblins everywhere,
00:13:54
Speaker
Far too long, the great war, the dwarfs against, you know, goblins, orcs, and the things that we were made to do from those above us, it's not that much different than Darnaldi and what he's trying to get you all to do. You all deserve so much more than everything that's been given, the hand that's been dealt. I wish for nothing than that, for your freedom and happiness and
00:14:21
Speaker
You shouldn't have to answer to someone like Darnaldi any longer. We just want to live here in peace. In our own village and treated as our own home. You know? That's all we want. That's all we all want. Well, that's great. Well, you guys be safe if I don't see you in the morning.
00:14:36
Speaker
If I do, then I'll wish it again. It's worth it. I'm going to bend kind of over where we're standing. There's there's a little patch of sort of wildflowers kind of nearby. I'm going to pick them. They're yellow and orangish. It's kind of natural for Wild Hill here, and I'm going to say here a tip from the wise. I think your your friend will enjoy these. I'll keep it. I'll keep it hush as I kind of put my finger over my lips like I'm.
00:15:04
Speaker
zipping, zipping my lips closed. He looks at him and he takes one out. And he looks at it. And he looks at you and does this toothy goblin grin. And he bites the flower off the stem. Oh, yes, she's gonna love them and turns around and walks off. I picked one, one more flower and I take a bite and say, Hmm, not bad. It's super bitter. It's like, it's like black licorice. It's no bark, that's for sure.
00:15:31
Speaker
Jox who would probably love this for his ale and then with that I'm gonna kind of just be spittling is what I can of the flower out of my mouth as I walk back to the
00:15:49
Speaker
Yeah, do so in a way to not like, right? Yeah. Okay. All right, you guys get back in and you lay down for your rests and it does not take you guys very long at all to feel like you can sleep any anything happening as you get ready to go to sleep. I just want to make sure you've done everything you want to do before the nightfall.
00:16:12
Speaker
Yeah, I think if I notice it quite enough that I think everybody is down, I might go to Daven and sneak into his room. Not really sneak, but just go in there. Okay. Yeah, you can tell that everything's kind of chilled out. Everybody's settled in.
00:16:34
Speaker
pretty quick there, so yeah. And I'll do a little tap on the door. Devin, are you up? I'm up. Come on in. Yep. And then I'll go in. I have an unusual thing to ask of you. All right. You know how I've been having you help me with that ring storing spells in it? Yeah, of course. Yeah, it's been really helpful actually.
00:17:02
Speaker
Yeah. Can you promise not to be weird about this? Every time somebody says something like that, it's when something weird is going to happen. I hold out my hands and then I summon the familiar that I
Davin's Discovery: Gwendolyn's Familiar
00:17:21
Speaker
have. Meet spell slots. What in the world is that thing?
00:17:27
Speaker
I mean, it's a helpful little hand. I mean, three hands is better than two, right? I guess so. But I mean, most people have like a cart as a
00:17:40
Speaker
I don't know why this is what appeared. Justice is probably the only one else who's seen it at this point. She helped me with the brazier whenever I cast the spell I was using. Was it like floats in the air or crawl on the ground? Like, how does it work?
00:18:00
Speaker
Yeah, it just it just cross. It seems to have a kind of sixth sense. It doesn't need to see really. It just kind of knows where everything is, which he can kind of, I suppose he, maybe she, they, it. Or spell slots. Spell slots can stay in the brew hole.
00:18:25
Speaker
um but you can see that it's got the ring so can you can you cast haste and into it sure um yeah that's fine no problem and i'll uh i'll reach out and just like
00:18:37
Speaker
go to touch the hand and realize like, okay, I don't actually have to get that close to the thing. So I'm just going to cast it and put away and cast. Yeah. It like crawls a little like to the tip of my hand, like closer to you as it's like waiting. Devon kind of jumps back slightly as if he just saw a spider kind of jump out at him. Sorry, it's under the creepy. I'm sorry. Um, and then I'll cast taste at the ring.
00:18:58
Speaker
All right, and this is in your crawling hand, right? Your little undead crawling hand. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Awesome. Yeah. I mean, you get used to it. It took me a minute to understand maybe some benefits out of it. Well, I mean, as long as this isn't strangling me in the night, I'm fine with it. I mean, I guess it could try. It doesn't have a lot of the weight behind it. It does look very weak.
00:19:25
Speaker
I mean, that's a little mean. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to insult your third hand. It's a little mean. So it's OK, Spellsloth. Sorry, that was a little offhand. Well, I'm not sure I'm ready to show the rest of the group yet. I think that's maybe just way to the right moment.
00:19:54
Speaker
Yeah. I mean, it just seems a little fresh with the things that have been going on in this village. Yeah. When you fight an undead creature and then afterwards you say, look at my undead hand, it's a little strange. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I'll figure out a time. Thank you. No problem. Is that all you needed? Yeah. Yeah. Thank you for everything. No problem. I'm glad you're alive. I was kind of scared for a minute there.
00:20:24
Speaker
I was too. I'm not sure what I would have done. I mean, if you're like Craig's, apparently you can just get a blessing and come back to life. Yeah. I mean, where was that on my side? I guess. Maybe you're the stronger of the two. You don't need it. We'll go with that. Sure. I like it. You have a good night. All right. Get that thing away from me.
00:20:51
Speaker
And then I'll kind of close my hand and it'll disappear into its little pocket portal. That is pretty cool, though, I'll say. I wish I would have had a little bit more time with it before the last battle, I think. I think it could have been a little bit more helpful. Yeah, we're all alive. That's what matters. Yeah. Okay, you have a great night. I'm going to walk out of here. Devon will turn over in his bed and shiver. Why does it have to be undead like that? And then he goes to sleep.
00:21:22
Speaker
I'll just go back and just kind of sit up in bed for a little bit and just ponder and then lay down. All right. So as you guys lay down, settle in to go to sleep, the night goes through without any drama. But when you guys get up, what do you do when you wake up the next morning?
Morning in Goblin Village
00:21:43
Speaker
Anybody? Gwen's not the first one up. She stayed up late with Dale to go over her spells again. Okay.
00:21:50
Speaker
Uh, Devin will wake up, just kind of like forgive a big stretch and walk out, kind of walk down the hall and see that all the other doors are still closed. So he's just going to go out and sit on like the front porch area of the house and just watch, watch the little sunrise. Okay. Yeah. It's a, it's a lovely morning. There's some goblins up already as they do like the early morning feeding of the animals, but it's still pretty quiet in town.
00:22:13
Speaker
I think I'll just kind of pick up and tidy up the room a bit and walk out, probably see Daven out on the porch.
00:22:24
Speaker
And maybe, uh, maybe now after everything's calmed down a bit, just, just kind of take in some of the nature, see if there is any flowers or anything that he hasn't seen around, um, that he might understand or might be interested in survival check. You do as you come out and start looking around. You both, you both notice, uh, you both notice natural 20 hands went up in the air. Uh, through, through, uh, my nor my new,
00:22:54
Speaker
That's so cool, Dice Tower. It's so cool. Broken jaw skull. You do notice across the way, somebody is starting to string up that borehide to dry, to tan it. So there's a couple goblins stretching that and tying it off to some stakes they've put in the ground. Tall stakes. And that's happening. And they're just working hubbub going about. As you do look around, you look around and see the vegetation.
00:23:23
Speaker
you do see those small kind of like dandelion type orange flowers. These are the ones that Krigs had seen the night before. Also kind of over near the path going south into the forest into the wilds you see which is actually would be southeast into the wilds you see a few patches of flowers that are kind of white and blue there and they have little
00:23:49
Speaker
every so often one of the flowers, the stems coming off of them of the little branches coming off the stems have little berries attached to them as well. So there's like these little berries with flowers, these little bushes kind of over there. I will definitely go in that direction. Okay. Yeah, you haven't really seen these before, but with the natural 20 you already rolled, you know,
00:24:18
Speaker
Quite a few species of berries that do bloom flowers and you're pretty confident that these are edible or usable for food or drink of some kind and that they bloom in the fall. They're a pretty good sign that these kinds of berries are a pretty good sign that
00:24:38
Speaker
is transitioning into the cooler months of the year, which makes you feel that some of the more heavy fruit plants should be ripening about now. Interesting. I'll gather what I can in a couple of hands and then just head back and wait on the rest. Okay.
00:25:02
Speaker
You do find it a little odd. Most places like this, there wouldn't be berry bushes of that size because they would be picked too much, but you get the feeling these goblins aren't super into gathering fruit as much as they are.
00:25:19
Speaker
Yeah, I feel like Gwen offered some fruit and nut and they weren't super excited about that. Yeah, exactly. So this is kind of some good untouched, not meaning untouched lands, but just unbothered foraging area here that you
00:25:41
Speaker
Nobody here forages, really, too much. There's a little bit of root gathering for people who visit, but not lately, so. Awesome. I'll just kind of take a stick to whatever fire is there and just kind of poke and wait. Yeah, yeah. The fire's been stoked up a little bit for the morning, but you're able to get it to start sparking and getting a little bigger. Krigs, how about you? What are you doing this morning? I am still in bed. OK.
00:26:09
Speaker
Krigs is in bed. Gwendolyn, I assume you're in your bed? Yeah, all of a sudden, when it cuts to her, you hear a, and she, oh my, ow! She had rolled out of bed in her deep sleep. She was dreaming all night due to her like three hours of sleep. And what had happened, she slowly over the course of time just fell out of bed. Ow!
00:26:36
Speaker
What? Well, I guess I'm up. Dale, are you ready? And she goes over to Dale who also fell out of bed on the other side. Oh, you're fine. And she picks him up and she starts gathering her things. Daven hearing that noise. He'll go in the house just to make sure everything's all right. Okay. Yeah. Yes. Everything is fine. No one fell.
00:27:05
Speaker
Alright, the way you said that made it sound like somebody fell, but I don't know why you would lie to me about that, so... No! I can't believe I did this. I'm going to get Craig. I'm going to start knocking on Craig's door. Okay. Come in. Peeking through the door. Are you alright, Cardi?
00:27:27
Speaker
Uh, you're going to see Craig's laying in bed. He's fully dressed, got like shield propped up on the side of the bed, hammer propped up on the side of the bed, but he's just laying there and he's like, come on in. All right. I'll walk in the door and I'll close it behind me. What's going on? It doesn't get any easier from here, does it? I don't think so. Are you worried? I'm not worried. I just so tired, like,
00:27:54
Speaker
We've only known each other for how many months now, and it feels like we've already gone through lifetimes worth of hassle and problems, but...
00:28:03
Speaker
This is... I get the feeling this is just the beginning of something that is going to be very difficult for all of us. And I lay here and I think I could just not get up. I could stay here. I could be one with the goblins, dance offs every night and just ignore the other donaldies in the world. I could just stay here. It doesn't get easier, does it?
00:28:33
Speaker
I'm sure you told me before, but how old are you? I remember, right? It's 140, 150. You lose count after about 75. I'm 30. I've spent my entire life living at home with my family. I've only actually been out for maybe three years now, I think, away from my family. And before that 27 years, and then the three years before I met you, I've had more life experience just in the past few months than all of that combined.
00:29:01
Speaker
And yes, it's been hard. It's been tiring. And it's been dangerous, for sure. It's also been a lot of fun. I don't know about you, but I've had a lot of fun. And I feel like for the first time in my life, at least, that I'm actually making some sort of a difference in the world. Maybe smaller ones right now, but I feel like what we're doing is the right team. And for that, I think it's worth getting out of bed. I could go home and just live on the farm with family, help my family out there. I could go back to one of the big cities and go do more magic tricks for people passing on the streets and earn some coin that way. But why?
00:29:31
Speaker
Why live life like that when I can just come out here and actually make a difference, help people like these goblins we've done? We've saved these people. Think about that. Sure, it's hard. Sure, it's dangerous, but it's worth it. I hate it when you're right. By the way, Gis has himself a sweetie. Oh, good for Gis. Oh, man. I hate that I was muted for my big outburst laugh when you said that. I guess we should catch up with the others. I assume Gwen's still asleep.
00:30:01
Speaker
She fell out of bed. She's going to be fine. He said I did it both. I did not. Craig's laughed. Well, let's carry on then.
00:30:19
Speaker
Things we got better things to go kill and with that he cinches his shield back to his back and puts his hammer kind of on his side and Perks himself up stands tall as tall as he possibly can all of three foot and says let's start the day One more thing and then I'll go over and I'll stick my hand on his shoulder You know, give me a big smile and I'll say if you die again, I'm going to kill you. All right
00:30:49
Speaker
I will not be doing that again, I don't think. At least not for another 700 and 800 years, who knows how long I'll live. I hope not that long, that's a long time. Alright, let's go.
00:31:05
Speaker
Ba-da-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-
00:31:32
Speaker
Well, I don't know how to podcast, so I did need someone to... Push the record button? All right. Yeah. So I realized that there are some absolute gems in here, and I did not want to pre-read them. I want to experience this fresh with you, the listener. And I think that when you submit reviews for the show,
00:31:59
Speaker
will read them on air. And I think that that'll just be a really fun thing to do. And if you haven't already left a review for the show, you absolutely should. Because this is how people know that podcasts are good. And if you want people to make podcasts, you have to tell other people their podcasts are good so other people listen to them. Oh yeah, we love it. It makes us feel really good inside.
00:32:22
Speaker
The first review we're going to read is from PayPay5000, and I would love for PayPay5000 to be a person on the show. So thank you, PayPay5000, if you're here and listening. You mean the world to me, and I love you very, very much. All right. Well, The Hired Swords has five out of five stars, which is not surprising whatsoever. Laddered much? That's me. I think one of these is mine.
00:32:51
Speaker
Yeah.
00:32:53
Speaker
I don't remember what I wrote because I wrote it before I knew you guys, just when I was a cash, enjoying. All right, so paypay5000 wrote five stars, first of all. My brother is the producer. Oh, that's you. And oh boy, I'm so glad these guys have worked really hard for these podcasts. Good job, the hired swords. Your podcast will never get old, even in 100 years.
00:33:21
Speaker
Oh, just let that adorableness sink in for a second. That's such a good review. That's your brother? That's my brother, yeah. Aww. Alright, so the other review that I can see up here is from Unicorn Lucy. Also five stars. My uncle is the DM, smiley face. Alright, so maybe these reviews are skewed. Maybe a little bit. You know what? You know what? I'm here for it. Let's be honest. I am very here for it.
00:33:50
Speaker
Okay, so this is a five-star review by Fantastic Discussions. Amazing storytelling, fantastic cast chemistry, one of the best TTRPG games on here. That's not wrong. This is a highly underrated podcast between the storytelling, the production levels, and the cast as a whole. This is by far one of my favorite TTRPG podcasts to listen to.
00:34:13
Speaker
The DM does a fantastic job at working the story to each character, and the cast plays their own PC to perfection while working together to tell an incredible story. If you want to know what D&D is really like, don't watch Critical Role. Listen to this hit-up of friends play a game while telling a story that will make you laugh,
00:34:31
Speaker
cry, and wonder about their sanity at times. Yeah, seriously, especially in those early ups. I love the uniqueness of each character here, and the DM is wildly ready for the shenanigans they throw at him. My inspiration for my own campaign, and if I could give them more stars, I would. That's so sweet! I have never read this one, and I am blushing a little bit, but I honestly don't know if Michael actually is ready for our shenanigans half the time.
00:35:00
Speaker
Uh, almost certainly not from what I have, from what I have gathered. Oh, my own review, a really great actual play with great character development, consistent personas, and a DM with some really nice NPC range picks up really quickly. Apparently that's what I care about in a podcast. Well, at least now we know future podcasts, if you're out there, pick up very quickly.
00:35:25
Speaker
So anyway, in the future this segment will be quick, and right now it wasn't because this was like one baby.
Listener Reviews and Personal Connections
00:35:32
Speaker
So if you want me to be here more often, then leave a review and I will be summoned to your ear holes to read your own words back to you. All right, well, thanks for listening. Don't forget to leave a review. Bye. All right, so.
00:35:55
Speaker
you all heading out now? Gwen, are you joining them? Yeah. When Gwen walks out, she has her bag around her and Dale in her hands and good morning. And you can see a wound, just a big lump on her head, but she doesn't know it's there. Gwen, good to see you. Are we ready? Yes, I think we are. Jox is already outside. We'll go meet up with him.
00:36:18
Speaker
Oh, Gwen, one moment. I had something to ask you. What is it? It's a secret. And he's going to like motion you to kind of bend down to whisper in your ear. She hesitantly just leans in.
00:36:34
Speaker
Uh, I'm going to put my hand kind of up to your ear and cast lay on hands, dumping like two, three hit points out of my pool to fix the wound that you don't see. Cause I don't want you to be embarrassed amongst the goblins. Uh, but I'm going to wisp, whisper, this has a sweetie. Don't tell jocks or we know he can't keep a secret.
00:36:58
Speaker
We have to make sure that Dale doesn't know either because he's big on gossip. I know. Make sure he doesn't find out. Right there. I look down at Dale and I give him a stink eye. And you see my hand turn as Dale faces him unconsciously. That's good. So now you have a healed forehead.
00:37:25
Speaker
Thanks. Wendland starts to skip outside. She feels way better. Yeah, that knot on her head, that knot on her head just started to, like, absorb back in and here's a pretty little elven, half elven forehead again. All right. Which way, where are we going? North, right? I believe so. You're the one with a map. I mean, what you want to call a map, it's a bunch of jumbly words, but... Well, that's kind of sort of what maps are, right?
00:37:55
Speaker
Yeah, so. Wait, who has the map? I don't even remember. Dora has the map. Duh. Who? Oh, Dora. Dora. Dora. That one took me a second, but that's good. So you don't, your map is kind of like that weird, right? You don't have a map of the area. I don't, I don't have a map. It's the only person I thought had a map was Gwen had a map that she uses, right?
00:38:19
Speaker
Yeah, and then we'd found Darnoldi's note that has like circles of like the Shadow Wild. Yeah, but it wasn't really a map. Yeah. Right. That was more like some kind of like.
00:38:30
Speaker
At least general idea or direction of where he was or something like that. I know that we're supposed to go north and then that's about it. Yeah, that's all you guys really know. Yeah. And it's said that North. Yeah, I guess said that Darnaldi likely went north and and when I asked for a map in Wild Hill, most there weren't many people who have traveled much more north than we are now. Correct.
00:38:57
Speaker
Well, yeah, a little ways, but not a couple of days north from here or so, but not much further than that from what you understand. Yeah. So there'd be no real path to the north. It is. So there is a path that leads north along the kind of foothills and the forest between kind of where this village is nestled into the foothills like the, like wild Hill is.
00:39:20
Speaker
It is more dense forest here than it is right outside of Wild Hill, but in the pathway is very narrow. It's more like hunting trails and that sort of stuff. It's not heavily trafficked, you know. But it does kind of wind its way through the trees and around the foothills. And somebody roll a D20 for me as you wander. I think Joxer should since he got this cool new dice roll. Yeah, just remember though, Joxer, not all who wander are lost.
00:39:50
Speaker
That's where I lost. Was that a check or just a D20? Just a D20. That is a 13. As you travel, you travel into about halfway through the day and it hasn't really warmed up like it has been in the middle of the day. You get the feeling you are fully settling into autumn now, this time of year.
00:40:20
Speaker
Gwendolyn, you hear and see all the creatures kind of scurrying about, gathering what they need for the, as they start to gather their storage, you know, for the winter and all the signs that the seasons are changing are around you. The hills kind of roll up to your left into this smaller mountain range, much smaller than the stone mountains, but a mountain range nonetheless to your left, the west. And as, as you look that direction, you can see.
00:40:50
Speaker
the tree line kind of start to dwindle as the hills get bigger and bigger. And it's just kind of, it's really lovely here. It's really nice. It's very different than when you were heading deep into the forest before staying kind of on this outskirts. It feels kind of for the first time, and you may get the sense for the last time, feels a little bit like just any other day traveling through the forest, through the woods.
00:41:19
Speaker
And you continue going until you reach a small clearing as the trees had been kind of gathering more and more tightly as you traveled north. You reach kind of a small clearing where as the sun begins to set behind the mountains to your left, you're kind of already in the shadow of those mountains. It is starting to feel a little crisp as you realize your elevation is increasing.
00:41:43
Speaker
as you walk and you're starting to feel a little crisp, a little cool in the shadow. Night is coming soon. Would you like to just settle in for the night or are you going to continue traveling some? Um, I think that it's best to stop when it gets dark. I think we should do that. That's fine. Cause when we hit exhaustion, when it got to morning time,
00:42:05
Speaker
If you traveled all night, yes. Okay. I'm good to stop. I don't think we're in really a hurry, right? We could check our time with us. Yeah, since it's a bit of an unknown path, we might as well take our time. It's lovely enough here. I don't mind sitting out under the stars for another night.
00:42:22
Speaker
It is quite nice, isn't it? And she just looks around. Even though it's getting nighttime, she just feels in the breeze. It feels nice. It's comfortable. Right. So settling in for the evening.
00:42:38
Speaker
Are you doing any hunting, foraging, spell casting, fooding, any of that stuff, brewing? I think I'll probably run off into the brew hole if no one has any use for me and then I'll try to check out those berries a bit. There's always a use for you in the brew hole. Cool. Okay. So you can do your brewing.
00:43:04
Speaker
Anyone else have anything to do or say as the evening comes along? Is anybody taking watch? Like what's all that going to look like? Uh, well, we're kind of setting up camp, grabbing some firewood and getting things ready. I'm going to look to Gwen and say, Gwen, that thing you did when we were leaving the hut back there, how'd you do that? Do what? That thing where you're like, you're like walking, but it was like a, like a hoppy walk thing that you were doing out there. Oh, the, the, the lollahoe skip.
00:43:32
Speaker
Yeah, I've never seen that before. How do you do that?
00:43:36
Speaker
It's kind of like, and she kind of just bends down and starts, you want to take your foot. She just man handles his foot and she pulls it up. You're going to pull this one up and then she gets the other one and tries to pull it up, but realizes he can't stand on no feet. So she puts the other one down. You're going to just do like, it's, it's the lolly hose skip. Did your parents not tell you? Did they not teach you?
00:44:03
Speaker
I taught me how to walk like a normal person. Is this like an editing thing or am I just out of the loop? I thought everyone knew it. My mom showed it to me when I was a kid and I haven't done it in a while.
00:44:20
Speaker
feeling good this morning and she actually kind of traces back and doesn't know why she was feeling that good because she literally hit her head and it's just a way of walking. I can't believe that you don't know how to walk like this. I like it. I'm going to practice it. It looks faster too. It's like not quite running, but it's not walking. It's good. Go ahead. Try it. And she just stares at him. All right. I'm going to try it and I'm going to try and skip.
00:44:50
Speaker
Make a dexterity check. He's like, I want to roll something. Ooh, no, it's a five. Yeah. So, uh, Joxer's not anywhere to be seen. Krigs is kind of doing, you know, soldier duties, getting camp set deep in thought. And you guys are standing over to the side as Davins takes his first couple of steps. And he looks like, almost looks like he's about to skip until his, his back foot.
00:45:17
Speaker
comes down right on the heel of his front foot, kicking his front foot out, causing him to just fall backwards right on his backside, thud. And he hits his butt and both elbows and is pretty hilarious, Gwendolyn. Oh, my coccyx. It's one hit point, Daven. It's pretty crazy. You just see Gwendolyn go, and then she may like, stop laughing. And she bends down to help him get back up.
00:45:47
Speaker
I need to practice, obviously. It's okay. I can show you more. It's hard to explain. I just... It looks so easy. I don't understand how... It was so simple. You just lifted one foot up and the other one foot up. I don't know. I don't know. I'll try it later. Maybe it's because at the end of the day, I'm just sorry.
00:46:05
Speaker
that's probably it and as the conversation kind of dwindles she just has a sad happy melancholy memory of being with her mom and picking flowers or getting wood just a nice family moment. Nice.
00:46:25
Speaker
As you come back to camp, you're going to see me going around to the different berries. The ones that I know that aren't poisonous because I'm at least somewhat versed in that. I'm going to walk up and I'm going to... Hello? My name is Safran.
00:46:41
Speaker
May I have some of your berries please? And then I'm going to gently pick like enough just from that one to where it doesn't look too sparse and I'm gonna bow my head. Thank you. Have a good night and I'm gonna go onto the next bush and just keep collecting like food throughout the little area here but trying to do so kindly.
00:47:06
Speaker
Nice. Yeah, you you as you go through the the forest asking for everything you're foraging the there's no real sign that anything is like giving you permission, but you feel a lot better about it. Like you feel like you're doing it the right way. So that's what that's why we do half of the things we do, isn't it? Very, very good point. Very good point. All right. So make a survival check as you look for all that stuff to try to harvest as well. Sure.
00:47:35
Speaker
Uh, 90 20 man. Um, you find a, basically a smorgasbord of fruits and berries and roots and mushrooms. And just, you kind of bring back some, some delicacies. Could you call me the mushroom daddy? That is who you are. And that is who you are. Yes. The mushroom daddy. It is Craig's the mushroom daddy. There's, there's a next mug of the month coming up soon. Uh,
00:48:06
Speaker
It has to be but yeah, so you're you've got a nice little meal you've got Daven's got some sore elbows and Great or a jocks or how'd you do brewing? Um, so I I made a really nice brew I don't have anything that I'd be able to take with me, but I could offer it up to the group for something to Keep keep us warm at night
00:48:35
Speaker
It's actually kind of the one that I wanted to offer Daven but never got to. There were some things that got in the way. Gotcha. Okay. All right. Well, he has that to offer to everyone and he offers that. You've got food, you've got drink, you've kind of got an evening.
00:48:59
Speaker
to kind of sit around the fire and chill out any, in any particular conversation, anything needs to go on during this chill session. I'd at least, uh, uh, Devin, this one, I think I'm, I'm, I'm calling it fairy tale and, and I, I feel like you might enjoy this one. It's, it's a much sweeter variety. All right. I'll take a sip of it.
00:49:22
Speaker
And for the, like, as you drink it, you would gain one D4 plus five health. So that one health is healed. Nice. Your elbows, the skinned elbows kind of heal up and you don't feel that sting on your elbows anymore. And your coccyx on your back, you kind of feel that align back like it's supposed to be. It's not out of place and you kind of wiggle a little. Is that where the coccyx is? It is.
00:50:00
Speaker
Yeah, I feel like the sweeter flavor has a little bit more to give and not so much the negative side effects at night. Yeah, my elbows feel better. I didn't fall, by the way. I didn't... Have I heard that today? Was that a... Has someone fallen? No. No? I like the way it just bolted perfect unison.
00:50:13
Speaker
I wasn't sure.
00:50:30
Speaker
Right. Well, I'm glad no one's fallen today. Episode title, the fall of the hired swords. Perfect. It's also autumn. Yeah. Multi-layered, I love it. It's just so layered, yeah. It's great. And Krigs, you did quite well gathering. What's just growing into your own little gatherer, huh?
00:50:57
Speaker
These are from Charles, and these are from Christopher, and Diane gave us these other ones. You know, I don't know about that, Steven, but well, let's just say they've all been a little generous this evening. Did they all speak to you or do you just know their names? Well, I mean, I must clearly if I'm the mushroom daddy.
00:51:29
Speaker
Is that something you've never told us about? I feel like it would have come up in conversation, Krigs. Oh, no, you know this. It's the way of the forest, the king of the leaves, the mushroom daddy.
00:51:45
Speaker
The way of the wild! I'm the ward of the wild, sir! I... I... That's... I will keep that in mind. Mushroom daddy. Next time, share those other mushrooms too with us, all right? Let's just... Let's just say, if we're going to be continuing on, I've fallen with myself. I'm not sure what you're trying to get at with that, but, you know, let's just eat some dinner and relax. We probably should get a bit early.
00:52:10
Speaker
Yes, let's. All right, so you guys need to go ahead and eat, start to settle in. Who's taking watch? I think Joxer will definitely want to take first watch. Okay. Who wants to roll the random encounter roll? A D20. That's a win. I'll roll my Dale dice. As I settle in, I cast Mage Armor, just to preface. Okay. 17.
00:52:35
Speaker
All right, so with the 17, the night's peaceful. It's a nice, calm, cool night. You can't quite see your breath, but I mean, it's about that cold. Get close. You find yourself jocks or wanting to stay as close to the fire. Stay pretty close to the fire and you tend to be stoking it here and there. As soon as it starts to dwindle a little, you realize, oh, I feel that chill and you kind of stoke it up a bit.
00:52:58
Speaker
And as the light kind of flickers on the trees around you, you can see and kind of hear the pitter patterns of feet. It causes you a little bit of almost like a start, you know, after everything that's going on, you know, every little sound and little blip and little something like that out in the woods, it keeps you on edge. And you're like, Oh, I'm glad to have mage armor. Because one of these times that something's going to be, you know, it's going to be something, you know. And, but
00:53:26
Speaker
It really is just you have no trouble staying awake as every little crack of a twig or fall of a walnut. There's something from the branches of a tree falling, an acorn falling and hitting the ground. Every little bit of something like that gets you a little start and you look up again and you have no trouble staying alert as you keep watch. Daven and Craig, you both are sleeping quite well. Gwendolyn, you begin to dream again.
00:53:56
Speaker
And in this dream, you were walking the same path you walked today. You're walking and everything is quite lovely. You're noticing the change of seasons and you feel a squirming in your bag and Dale crawls out and.
Gwendolyn's Dream: Journey to the Elven City
00:54:17
Speaker
Before you can even think what's happening, he scurries over off the trail to the edge of the woods and turns back up and looks at you and then scurries back into the woods. Do you follow him? Of course. Wait up. And she or she tries to talk. She can. You call out, wait up and start to follow. When you say wait up, you speak in Elvin without trying. That's just how it comes out.
00:54:47
Speaker
you follow and he seems to be just keeping at the edge of your vision and stopping and turning until he knows you know you can keep track and then he goes some more and stops and turns until you know he keeps track or he knows you can keep track and then at one point he stops and he turns and he says please hurry you silly move it here we go and scurries off and you follow him
00:55:12
Speaker
And suddenly he breaks through this small row of bushes. And when he does, you kind of break through now too. And you realize you're his size. You are now. What? A chipmunk as soon as you break through. And he says, come my dear, come follow me. And he scurries about and scurries. And as he does, he makes his way
00:55:38
Speaker
cross through this this little log that that is it's a long log he crawls in one of the one end of the log and Scurries out to the other side and there you're staying he comes out you come out of the other side of the log and he's standing on two legs like a person, but it's Dale and You're standing next to him, but you're you again and
00:56:04
Speaker
And he walks and as he walks, you're looking at him, you can't take your eyes off him, but he walks ahead of you. And as your eyes follow him, you see beyond, he's heading into the gates of a city. The stone of this city is white, as white as, as pure clouds with green, like gem inlay across the top. Standing guard are two proud looking elven men.
00:56:33
Speaker
Their armor is green and gold and brown. Their faces are tattooed with bluish green tattoos. And as Dale turns and looks at you as he gets to the doorway and he says, well, follow me. And he begins to walk in. And as you begin to, you watch, you see him walk in there. And as he steps through the doorway, the two guards lift their spears that they're holding in.
00:57:02
Speaker
Press them against their chest with a clang clang and stand in salute as he walks through and he turns back to you. Do you follow him?
00:57:10
Speaker
Yeah, I immediately would start running once he went through the gate. So you start running and they continue their position as you're running in. You walk into these city gates, which the gates themselves are wooden, large, dark wood, and they are just etched with this amazing, amazing carvings and just ornate, beautiful scenery of forest and creatures and animals, and it's beautiful.
00:57:40
Speaker
and but the gates are standing open and inside you see elves of all kind you see darker skinned elves you see lighter skinned elves you see everything in between some gray skinned elves some almost a bluish tint to their
00:57:54
Speaker
their flesh, their hairs, hair color ranges from blonde to brown to black to silver to purple to green. Just people just look like all kinds. And they're just doing business walking around. The buildings here are all made of this white stone. The streets are a green and gold and white kind of cobblestone as it's all etched through the town. And this is when you wake up. You can edit this out.
00:58:25
Speaker
mike
00:58:40
Speaker
Thank you for listening to this episode of Our Second Season. We really appreciate you joining us for this adventure, and if you really enjoyed our show, tell a friend about us. Leave a review on either iTunes or anywhere reviews are held. Be sure to check out our shop at thehired.store. And if you want to keep up with us and what we're up to, you can find us on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram at thehiredswords. And again, thank you for listening.