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Episode 65 - Uncanny X-Men #194-195, Power Pack #11-12 - POWER PACK
89 Plays1 day ago
You may, occasionally, think to say to yourself, "What is this podcast? Just two grown men reading comic books for teenagers?" WRONG. We've got RANGE. In THIS episode, we read a bunch of comic books for CHILDREN!
The X-Men meet the newest little super-team on the block, the POWER PACK. We get introduced to the writing of Louise Simonson through four little dorks who Pat can't keep straight in his head.
Plus a Pat's Deals and Steals that drives Matt insane.
TOPICS DISCUSSED:
The X-Men don't wannnnnnaaaaa. NAZGUL again. Nimrod has every super power. "If her name is Ariel..." John Constantine with a rattail. He's tacticizing. Dean Coolshoes. Kids have bad ideas. A shitty cop. Kitty's trenchcoat leotard. A whole new batch of morlocks. A racist(?) folk tale. Everybody hates Leech. Wolverine's gonna gut a little girl. RUN FOR IT!! These kids love the sewers. "I've never seen anyone so ugly!" WE JUST DID THIS YESTERDAY. A morlock who's a moving van. Inviting all the super-heroes to Thanksgiving.
TIMESTAMPS:
0:00 - Hello and Background
15:05 - Pat's Email Corner
33:40 - Did We Do Anything X-Men Related?
39:20 - Uncanny X-Men #194
1:00:00 - Power Pack #11
1:09:00 - Power Pack #12
1:31:15 - Uncanny X-Men #195
1:58:55 - Final Thoughts
2:03:30 - Pat's Deals and Steals
2:09:30 - Goodbye!
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Transcript
Live Report from Westchester
00:00:01
Speaker
I'm Trish Tobey with W.A.R.C. reporting to you live from Westchester, New York, where there appears to be some sort of mutant menace on the loose.
Introduction to Mutant Menace Podcast
00:00:37
Speaker
Hey, everybody. I'm Pat Reber. And I'm Matt Allcamp. And say it with us, Abe. Welcome to Mutant Menace. menace Oh, Matt. Oh, Patrick. Happy solstice.
00:00:52
Speaker
Oh, is it? Yeah. ah By the time this publishes, it will be over. But yes, it is the summer solstice. Summer solstice. So what do you do on the summer solstice? How do you celebrate?
00:01:03
Speaker
I stayed inside and played video games mostly.
Summer Solstice Celebrations
00:01:09
Speaker
Marvel rivals, right? That's what you're playing right now? Matt, please don't preempt my X-Men related activities.
00:01:17
Speaker
What are we talking about today? Matt, today we're talking about Power Pack. now Yes! Now, stay with me. It's a type of battery that you can buy at a Radio Shack.
00:01:31
Speaker
I will say, so what I haven't read much Power Pack before...
Power Pack Series Overview
00:01:37
Speaker
preparing for this episode and i probably won't read much more moving forward but not because it's bad yeah it is because it is written for children and i have gotten so accustomed to reading comics for teenagers and occasionally for adults i just can't do it like the stories themselves clever the way it ties into what we usually do here on this podcast i think is really interesting the art's fine there's a lot of cool creative stuff it's just yeah these are comic books written for children the ages of the power pack but they were on the gamut they're like what
00:02:21
Speaker
11 to 5 or something? 4? I don't know. yeah. yeah ah Yeah, I've read all of Power Pack. and My God. It's... Okay, well, I'll give some background first. It is by... It was created by Louise Simonson and June Brigman. It was basically Louise Simonson just kind of needed a project. Like, they they she was editing for a long time, and they were like, we need to give with the editor we need to give you something. and she came up with this whole power pack idea of just, like, four kids who get superpowers and then have to hide it from their parents.
00:03:00
Speaker
So... These are four kids, Alex Power, Julie Power, Jack Power, Katie Power. Yeah, their last name is Power. That's that's the age order. And I think it's something like ah Alex is 11, Julie's 9, Jack is 7, and Katie's 5. Something like that.
00:03:18
Speaker
The point is too young to be a young Avenger. Yes. And oh, here it is. Okay. In issue number one, Alex is 12, Julie is 10, Jack is 8, Katie is 5.
Origins of the Power Siblings
00:03:30
Speaker
Okay. They're like sleeping outside. like They convinced their parents to let them sleep outside one night, and they're just like sleeping on the porch. And an alien spaceship crash lands. And they they they live on like a they live on like ah like an oceanfront or like a bayfront house. thought you lived in...
00:03:49
Speaker
the middle of New York. They do. They move there a couple issues in, but a alien spacecraft crash lands piloted by a horseman.
00:04:00
Speaker
Beta Ray Bill. A Chimelion. That's his race. And he's like, his name's Kofi Whitemane. And he's just like, a he's got a he kind of like a sort of like a human body and a horse head. And his whole race is, has a whole lot of superpowers, like a whole bunch of superpowers. And as he's dying, he's being chased by the Snarks who were attacking his planet. The Snarks? No. They're like green lizard people who want to conquer the universe. um Why would you make them shark people?
00:04:34
Speaker
yeah And he crashes and he's like, i am going to die here, but I need somebody to protect your planet from the snarks. Or there's like a whole thing like their dad invented something that's going to destroy their planet and the snarks want to get a hold of it. and He's like, I need you to protect your planet. So as I die, I'm going to split my powers up between the four of you.
00:04:56
Speaker
Here you go. And he gives Alex gravity powers. He gives Julie speed rainbow flight powers. yeah He gives Jack ah density powers and Katie and ah energy powers the the good one so do you want to explain what because you know this part do you want to explain how their powers work yeah yeah so alex g is is he goes by g g they spell it g e e ah And it's funny to you think about whether you pronounce it G or G. I couldn't figure out which one to go with. um he
00:05:35
Speaker
can lighten the gravity of objects, right? he Or he can remove the gravity around objects. Including himself, yeah. Including himself. But he he doesn't have directional control. He just he knows how to... Right.
00:05:51
Speaker
It's a very funny thing because he can kind of fly. But really, he can just make himself light enough to hover into the like go into the air. Yeah. He needs to create the momentum.
00:06:03
Speaker
And then, yeah then he needs somebody to like pull him along. like As we'll see, like he uses a fire high fire extinguisher extinguisher. I'm sure we're about to get into some physics, uneducated physics debates here. Mm hmm.
Humorous Power Dynamics
00:06:19
Speaker
i we have julie the next oldest who is super fast yeah uh i don't think she actually goes light speed though but she does leave a three color trail behind her it's like a pink blue and yellow or like a magenta blue and yellow yeah i think it's supposed to be like a rainbow but it's it's just it's pretty close to the bisexual pride flag ah Well, there you go. We learned something about Julie. ah We have Alex. I had so much trouble keeping track of their names. Not Alex. You already said Alex. The jack next one is Jack.
00:06:59
Speaker
ah Jack. Mass Master. Mass Master. not du he's He's going to change that when he grows up. But he can adjust his own density in I think pretty interesting ways he can make himself super light to the point that he is a ah cloud of gas, uh, or super heavy.
00:07:25
Speaker
So very much like, um, who was the member of the hellfire club when we first met them? Harry Leland. Yeah. Who got just only eviscerated by Wolverine only when Jack,
00:07:38
Speaker
lightens his density, he turns into a cloud of gas. When he increases his density, he turns into a little tiny jack. Yes, he turns super tiny and heavy. He calls it his jackhammer, and he shrinks down. He's like, my 60-pound jackhammer! Because he's he's eight years old, he's only 60 pounds. Yeah, yeah. ah So yeah, that's a that's fun, and I think he has a better handle on it than Harry Leland did.
00:08:04
Speaker
And... Then we have, don't tell me, the little one. Annie. No, Katie. Julie. Katie. Julie. You already said Julie. Oh, there's already a Julie. Katie is Energizer.
00:08:20
Speaker
Katie iss Energizer. She has the ability to... I got a name wrong too, so before you guys email, I'll correct it when Pat's done. Don't email us about their names. we She has the ability to absorb... She calls it disintegrating, but essentially she's absorbing matter turning it into energy and blasting that energy out and it seems like she's her power is deadly yes yes she's the one that could destroy a city if she wanted to yes and um five years old she's got she's got a uh there's like a limit too so she can absorb a certain amount but then she starts glowing and then she'll get sick if she doesn't release it so she has to release it um
00:09:12
Speaker
So the guy, the name I got wrong was Alfire Whitemane. So Kofi Whitemane is their friend, they like of the little horse they meet later. Oh, they meet a little, they meet a, they meet one their, their age.
00:09:26
Speaker
When you say horseman,
Character Insights and Representation
00:09:28
Speaker
like, is he ah standing upright and just the head of a horse? Is he, yeah. And he's got our type or like, yeah. And it's like knees go backwards. Like a horse backwards. Like a, um,
00:09:41
Speaker
Like a little goat boy. Yeah, yeah, but like a tall man. Tall goat man. And then Kofi Whitemane. Kofi Whitemane is the... they They make friends with him later. He's like the cousin of Alfier Whitey Whitemane, who is the older guy who dies. Like, the first issue, ad horse dies. A horseman dies. Ooh.
00:10:08
Speaker
Yeah. Uh... Oh. Report on Julie Power's sexuality. She does come out as bisexual later in the future Foundation era of Fantastic Four.
00:10:21
Speaker
I told you. So. That is so. What? Yeah. Somebody had that same idea. They saw it. They were like, oh, okay.
00:10:33
Speaker
So anyway. Yeah, what so this is in early on in Power Pack. ah They start crossing over with the X-Men, and they'll do it a bunch, just in and especially in like really important moments in X-Men history, because pretty soon Louise Simonson is going to be a pretty big writer in the X-Men universe. Yes.
00:10:55
Speaker
But this is this is she's been the editor for so long, right, that her and Claremont are friends, so... And this crossover is very weird for reasons that we'll talk about, but it's not like a... It's not like a crossover, more as it's like a riff on the same story twice. Yeah, it's it's strange. I think the way that they weave it together is very fun, but...
00:11:22
Speaker
then it is just the same story over again. You'll you this one you'll see. So, okay. A little bit more background. Yeah. Matt, what other background might we need for today's episode? Juggernaut. We see Juggernaut again. um God. So it's, I am still having such a hard time reconciling this Juggernaut with the first Juggernaut we met. Cause I completely for like either forgot or didn't really like It hadn't really sunk into my brain that for his first 10 appearances, he was trapped in another dimension and he would only appear on Earth as a villain. When got teleported in. Yeah, when like the dimensions would align for some reason. Somebody would make a device and he'd be like, oh no, we accidentally brought Juggernaut here. Because he will never be cosmic like this again. He's now just like a guy stomping around.
00:12:19
Speaker
And despite all that, he's a fairly well-adjusted guy. Yeah, was we'll see in this issue. Like, the last couple times we saw him, he wasn't trying to do supervillain stuff.
00:12:35
Speaker
He was just like he was getting a birthday present for his friend. i guess they started destroying the city. Well, they got into a fight. Spider-Man said, well, I should get involved.
00:12:46
Speaker
And like, I think they would have settled that dispute between them. But they did cause a lot of destruction along the way. The time before that, he was just drinking at a bar.
00:12:58
Speaker
Yes. That's all he was doing. and you know And he fought Colossus because Colossus was heartbroken and they wanted to make him feel better, but also make him feel worse. because But he also almost got soul sucked by Selene. Yeah, they saved him from Selene by accident. That's such an interesting little detail. She would have been so incredibly powerful.
00:13:19
Speaker
what what are What's some other background we need? Where are the X-Men at this point? Chillin', right? We just got back from the Alpha Flight adventures, the Asgardian adventures.
00:13:31
Speaker
And in their own title, they just got back from War Hunt 2, so they just fought the Helions. Right, yeah, yeah. And that's like, I don't know, if there was they're in stasis right now, sort of.
00:13:46
Speaker
Getting ready for Secret Wars 2. I guess so, yeah. And then the Morlocks is the other thing you need to know about. um What we last saw of the Morlocks is that um anti-mutant sentiment is ramping up, so it's become dangerous to be a Morlock. Or to be a mutant in general. Professor x Xavier got...
00:14:08
Speaker
Fucking beaten nearly to death. Yeah. And then ah rescued by Callisto. And while he was down there, it was just ah like a passing mention that a woman named Anna Lee.
00:14:22
Speaker
Right. Her children were murdered for being mutants. Just a passing mention in an epilogue somewhere. Or no, it was in like a New Mutants issue. No, it was in like a dialogue. It was like Professor Xavier was walking around Morlock tunnels and somebody was like, Callisto, Annalise, kids have been killed. And Professor Xavier was like, that's so sad. And then like went on like a soliloquy about how hard it is to be a mutant. And it's like...
00:14:50
Speaker
Okay, is anyone going to care about these kids? Like, are we done with the the dead kids? Is that... um But all of this will be important in this series of issues. So that's the context you need.
00:15:12
Speaker
Oh, Matt. Really good timing because... oh yeah. If there was any more context, we would have missed it in lieu of Pat's email corner.
Listener Interactions and Feedback
00:15:26
Speaker
Boy, we got a bunch today. the oh The inbox is overflowing again, which is fine. I think people stopped emailing because we said that so many times, but we're celebrating it. We we like we would love to have so many emails that we can't read them all yes on on on air. We'll read them all, but we can't read them all on air.
00:15:43
Speaker
Exactly, yeah. But we use we read every single one, folks. Anyway, We're going to start off with ah but the old regular email Michael. Email Michael. Following up with episodes 62 and 63 response. He says, hey, Pat, tell Matt that life has been busy for me lately and I fell behind on episodes, but I'm caught up for a couple of days until episode 64 comes out. Oh.
00:16:10
Speaker
Is that this one? No. That's the last one. Oh, no, we're on 65. Okay. But... That means I have more than one episode to respond to today. In episode 62, the question was asked, does this episode suck?
00:16:25
Speaker
It wasn't your best, but at least you the bold stance of being against sexual assault when realizing when reading the Dazzler issues. Good job. Yeah, I mean, we're brave. I'll take it.
00:16:36
Speaker
In episode 63, the question was asked, why does Pat think why does Pat think that sucks? Pat thinks that sucks because like most men his age, he's developed highly specific and discerning tastes.
00:16:49
Speaker
With that, I shall take my leave. Taking his leave. Email Michael. What did you think sucked? i I don't remember. Yeah. But it's because I have very discerning tastes as a man of a certain age.
00:17:03
Speaker
I bet it was good. I bet whatever you thought sucked was good. Going to take it as a compliment. Up next, Matt, you remember you remember this guy, Canadian Dan?
00:17:14
Speaker
Yes. Yeah. met him le We just met him last week. Very polite. Thank you, Canadian Dan. i says, hello, Pat. Could you please tell Matt that I am not as polite as I came across and sincerely apologize for misleading you guys? What the fuck? Already untrue. He opened once again with hello, Pat. Could you please tell Matt?
00:17:34
Speaker
It's very polite. Thank you. In fact, when I played Pat's email corner to my Canadian sons, they were appalled. I'm glad you guys upped the Canadian content right away by covering X-Men and Alpha Flight. Makes me feel like my voice is being heard.
00:17:49
Speaker
Some more Canadian content for you is whenever I hear Matt's laugh is how I would imagine the master of the world to sound. Do I have an evil sounding laugh? I don't think so.
00:18:01
Speaker
It's too abrupt for like an evil. I do a lot of like outburst. Like it hits me in a second and it needs to come out. was like, yeah. um And also i i do a lot of like I laugh. I cut out pieces of my laugh sometimes because it goes on.
00:18:18
Speaker
like i mean like When I'm editing, I leave it Well, I don't normally choke like that. But there is normally like a back. there's like wrong yeah Yeah, there's a lot of.
00:18:30
Speaker
There's normally like a pullback at the end of the laugh. And I usually cut that out because it just sounds bad to listen to. I think it's endearing. And I'll cut out the middle of it because it'll it would be better if that was only like five of those.
00:18:45
Speaker
Like that.
00:18:49
Speaker
My favorite is when we are laughing so hard that we get silent and like there's there's three seconds of dead air because we're trying to catch our breath. I always leave that. That's so good. I try to. Yeah. Yeah.
00:19:01
Speaker
All right. Up next. Reading comics is the title line from his Name Was Dusk. What's his name now? I'm not sure he doesn't say here. Okay. so Let us know. his and His name was Dusk. Let us know.
00:19:14
Speaker
Hey, Pat, can you ask Matt if listening to an episode of Mutant Menace counts as having read the comics you described? Like if I'm talking to someone and they ask, have you read that Dazzler graphic novel? It feels like I should be able to say yes, right?
00:19:30
Speaker
I have an opinion on this. What do you think, Pat? This is a great question. Uh... I would say, yeah, you know what? Take the liberty. i I think we put a lot of work into this. We do read these comics very carefully. We're not just breezing through. Except for Secret Wars. Except for Secret Wars. Yeah. Probably Secret Wars too.
00:19:51
Speaker
And if you want to tell people, if now if you don't want to lie to people, you should say, oh yeah, I'm familiar. Yeah. And then they'll just assume that you are for some weird reason saying that you've read it. Oh, I'm familiar. You could also say, oh, yeah, i know it very well.
00:20:09
Speaker
Yes. Yeah. wo That's great, Matt. But um if you're OK with lying to people. Yeah, absolutely. I think we give you enough information to to fake it in conversation. You want know my feeling?
00:20:20
Speaker
yeah Yeah. I think if OK, you can say you read it if we did a good job. On that one. Sometimes we do a good job and sometimes we don't do a good job. So if we did a good job on that one, you can say, yes, I read it. If we didn't do a good job on that one, you have to say, no, I didn't read it, but I kind of know it.
00:20:41
Speaker
But the only way to know if we did a good job is ah here's what you got to do. You got to read the comic, then listen to the episode. And if we did a good job, you can say we read it.
00:20:53
Speaker
Here's the thing. Here's the thing about that, Matt, is if they say, oh, no, but, you know, I i i know the gist. People are just going to assume like, oh, you looked it up on Wikipedia.
00:21:06
Speaker
And that's not what they did. these no they're not These are not short episodes. They're putting a lot of work into that. Understanding what happened. Arguably listening to this podcast is more work than reading issues, but, but you don't have to read. Well, you do. If you want to know if we did a good job or not. So,
00:21:25
Speaker
You don't have to read the comics to say yes if we did a good job. And of course, if you want to read the comics, you can follow us on Patreon for free and get our reading lists. Reading lists. Yes. Thank you. His name was Dusk for bringing that Maybe we should start saying we did a good job on that one at the end of every... Or like, we didn't do a very good job here at the end of every issue. Like...
00:21:50
Speaker
And was like, to be continued. we didn't do a very good job. Yeah, you know what? please Read this one. The end. We did a really good job that time.
00:22:01
Speaker
i Ink Master Matt. Oh, hey, Ink Master. Has some comments on episode 64 for us. You ready? Ink Master says, hey, Pat, tell Matt that unfortunately at the time of writing, I still do not have my laptop back. Remember his laptop was broken? Does this make him dishonest?
00:22:20
Speaker
No. Oh, sort of. Here's what he says. he says, I had wrongfully assumed that the email corner would still be responding to emails from two episodes ago instead of the last episode.
00:22:33
Speaker
Oh, we used to do that when we were ah better. Sort of. About keeping up with recording this podcast. And now we fucking skin of our teeth.
00:22:43
Speaker
Matt, you just you don't know what you're talking about. This is my segment. Yeah. It is 621 right now. You guys are listening to this like four days after we record it.
00:22:55
Speaker
There is a very specific pattern to how emails, how and when emails get selected for Pat's email quarter. And if you're listening closely, we've been dropping hints through the entire run of this podcast. It's ARG, actually. If you put them all together, you get $10,000.
00:23:14
Speaker
so Don't make promises like that. They have to find it. There's $10,000. It's like a treasure map. Right. Yeah. If you don't find it, that's on you because we have put the location of $10,000 somewhere this podcast. Somewhere hidden throughout this podcast. Listen really closely, multiple times, and you have to refer it to 10 friends or you can't hear that. Your ears don't hear it anymore.
00:23:40
Speaker
So my apologies to Ink Master... He thought he had the puzzle solved. but He did not. ah With any luck, though, i should have it back by the time that this email gets read on air.
00:23:53
Speaker
We'll find out. Yeah. Good luck. we talked about Big Bertha a bit in the in the vein of large superheroes.
Character Design Discussions
00:24:01
Speaker
Ink Master says, yes, Big Bertha is a mutant and member of the Great Lakes Avengers. Like most of that team, she's originally a joke character. Only the joke in her case is in rather poor taste.
00:24:12
Speaker
For context, she's a supermodel, but her mutant ability her mutant ability is to control her body's adipose tissue. Is that how you pronounce that? Adipose? Adipose is how I've i pose heard it pronounced before, but i it's not a word. I'm like super, I don't hear adipose tissue very often in my life. yeah and I don't know what it means, but she can rapidly increase it.
00:24:36
Speaker
While in her bulked up state, she has superhuman strength and durability. In order to get rid of her excess mass, she has to vomit it up. That sucks. originally a supermodel with bulimia joke. That does suck.
00:24:47
Speaker
That sucks. I didn't know that part. I didn't know about the vomiting it up thing. And I didn't remember that she is a supermodel who can make herself larger.
00:25:00
Speaker
So she doesn't count. like she doesn't count Okay, yeah, yeah. She's not actually a yeah no A person that lives with being fat. Yes. Two more quick points from Inc here. I reject and am offended by the assertion that I am from the Midwest. I'll have you know that I am proudly from the Northeast. We we asserted that?
00:25:19
Speaker
We did. We said the the majority of our emailers come from either Canada or the Midwest. just one to shn And then finally from ink, I'd argue that Faye not being able to touch iron, but being able to touch stone with iron encased inside isn't a loophole in the same way that a human can't directly handle uranium, but can handle it with proper protective gear isn't a loophole.
00:25:44
Speaker
Okay, we didn't say it's a loophole that she couldn't touch it If it was in stone, we said it's a loophole that she could generate stone around it and then touch it. Right. There would be no. If if I was like if it was like um Superman is allergic to kryptonite, but he has an anti kryptonite force field that he can just put up if kryptonite gets near him. Like that's not.
00:26:12
Speaker
that Then he doesn't have a weakness to kryptonite, right? So if if she is, so if if a fey creature can't touch iron, but can create a substance they can touch out of thin air around the iron, then they're not weak to iron.
00:26:30
Speaker
That's just a, that's that's what feels like the loophole. Hmm. All right. Balls in your court, Ink Master. Let's get this debate going. A couple more emailers, Matt, here, and then we're done. We have Michael 2, Michael 2 emails. Oh. Mikey 2 emails. Hi, Michael 2 emails. That's his government name.
00:26:52
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, yeah. but
00:26:57
Speaker
Mikey two males in his non X-Men email says,
Cultural Identity and Listener Stories
00:27:00
Speaker
hi, Pat. Tell Matt. I said hello and sorry it took so long to email you all again. Folks, you don't have to apologize. It's okay. It's not a job. It is a a thing you do when you feel and are able to do it.
00:27:12
Speaker
I hope he had a lot of fun on his trip and I can clear up some confusion on Colorado and why it seems to have such a huge identity crisis. Colorado Springs has been home to several cults over the decades and is also where the Air Force base is located.
00:27:26
Speaker
ah Plus, with all the Texas people moving here is why there seem to be so many wannabe cowboys with bad opinions. Yeah. Meanwhile, all the cool people who were here before and during the weed rush, the green gold rush history, we'll someday call it, are pretty laid back. Plus, there's some major companies that moved to Denver, which brought a lot of California people.
00:27:48
Speaker
Wow. Yeah. I mean, it was it's just a bizarrely...
00:27:54
Speaker
i i'm I'm trying to avoid using all the same language I used before, but it is just every patch of it is like a different place. And yeah yeah the thing is, it's also the same with its weather and its geography.
00:28:10
Speaker
It's just like every you you you drive two hours in any direction in Colorado and you're in a different location. I love taking that anthropological lens to like a period of history in the last hundred years and being like, why is this, why is this town so strange? Oh, cause they closed all the state hospitals.
00:28:30
Speaker
i and Right. There's a very specific town near us. I'm thinking of, yes I won't mention my name. ah Yeah, that is.
00:28:41
Speaker
why And then his X-Men related email is just appreciating the copy of the X-Men in Texas State Fair ah yeah issue that we provided. It is a beautiful little time capsule.
00:28:53
Speaker
Cool. Yeah, no, no problem. Then finally, Glib Grendel. Remember Glib? Hi, Glib Grendel. Glib, welcome back two episodes in a row. Hey, Matt, tell Pat that I failed to say it with you the first time. Did hey, Matt, tell Pat. What the fuck? You're hang on kicked. Okay. Deep breath. I had not expected the quick turnaround. Once again, people think they have my my email system figured out. They don't.
00:29:20
Speaker
And I would have made the seven hour drive to Philly to record that with Pete. Pete is such a trooper doing that every week. I agree. I did, however, pull off into a random field to restart the podcast to do so properly. All is forgiven.
00:29:34
Speaker
Perfectly acceptable. That's very good so good. That's so good. I'm so happy. I'm so, I'm so proud of you, glib. Uh, and then she tells us about uh, i adventure she went on she was looking for a mystique dressed as a cowboy as a mural in Cincinnati and not actually we're pretty sure it's a mural not an actual mystique dressed as a cowboy but she was out in her X-Men dress which she provides a photo of as well oh and this is a Marvel Comics dress or yeah sorry oh a Marvel Comics dress that's a cool dress fantastic yeah a lot of patchwork stuff it's ah very cool
00:30:16
Speaker
So I'm thinking every mural with a cowboy in it could be. Could be mytique mystique. And then Gleib actually sent us a second email.
00:30:35
Speaker
Just responding to the actual episode 64. Okay. Okay, cool. She apologizes for stepping on Mikey Two Males' nickname. You're welcome to send us two males. Send us two males. What makes Mikey Two Males Mikey Two Males is that he does it every week.
00:30:51
Speaker
um I've only seen the word anodyne in a monster of the week scenario, as in the anodyne pines. While the trees had a mind altering it effect, I wouldn't call them healing as they also ate people and were of aliens. Yes. Deep implications for Madeline's baby.
00:31:09
Speaker
I don't think you recognize the struggle of deciding to be a dog or Catholic. I found it very relatable. I assume the other call to arms was asking what Thor would name his dogs. I'm thinking Jonathan, the lab of lightning.
00:31:24
Speaker
That's funny. I'm appreciating your coverage of the specials as my primary collection was all seemingly bought as direct edition. So I missed all of them, which is I absolutely love that. Even to avid X-Men fans, we are finding some new things. Yeah.
00:31:41
Speaker
And then finally, it was very shocking for a winged horse to appear between issues as a kid. Yeah, just suddenly it's there. Yeah. Glad to finally know they aren't native to Rochester. So I think it's fun to try and name Thor's dogs because we we figured out his his goats' names are Toothnasher and Toothgrinder. Cruncher, Grinder. Yeah, so if he had dogs, would they just be named like Jonathan, like Glyb says? Yeah. it was like, this is my goats, Toothnasher and Toothgrinder. These are my dogs.
00:32:19
Speaker
John and Tracy. Yeah.
00:32:23
Speaker
Little Thor and little other Thor. it And then here's an interesting sign off. Not a nickname. Glib Grendel.
00:32:35
Speaker
Oh, OK. So not a nickname. So. We could. that and technically, that's three emails from Glib.
00:32:46
Speaker
So we could assign nickname Glib. Yeah, sorry for the assumption. Yeah. Yeah. Well, we had a reason for assuming that that was a nickname just based on the the way the email came in. But we apologize. Yeah. So glib.
00:33:08
Speaker
What's that? What's a good? So hmm. What if we did glib two males? Glibby two males. Glibby two males. I mean, the dress is cool.
00:33:19
Speaker
Let us think on this one. This is not a bit. Now, understanding that glib's not a nickname and get you a proper nickname. Field of glib. Remember, she pulled off into a field.
00:33:33
Speaker
Yeah.
00:33:40
Speaker
Oh, right. Oh. Sorry, i i lost where we were for a second. Came out of it as quickly as we came into it. we're we're ready to We're right here. We're right now. Sometimes when you're a podcast, it feels like you just got to say stuff. Yeah, yeah. The thing is.
00:33:59
Speaker
the thing is We can edit this. So there's no, like dead air is not a problem. It's okay. It's okay to not say something. But then like, then it will we both freeze at this moment where like, you kate we came back and no one was saying anything. And so I say something like, shit we shit I say something' say something like, we came back as quick as we, it's like, what the fuck am I talking about?
00:34:28
Speaker
All right, Pat, I got to ask you something, actually, while we're here.
Marvel Characters and Gaming
00:34:32
Speaker
Did you do anything I said related this weekend? Oh, my goodness. this Matt, we talked about it on the Discord a little bit, but i yeah, I got into a new basic B video game, as i as I'm known to do. Yeah, yeah that is your your your style. music It is. ah But years after everyone else gets into it is usually much like you with movies, right?
00:34:57
Speaker
Oh, yeah, true. Except you watch good movies. I've been playing Marvel rivals, which is essentially a clone of Overwatch, which I had played once or twice a very long time ago. oh my God. But all with licensed Marvel characters.
00:35:16
Speaker
it's Is it free? it is free. What? And all of the characters, like, you don't have to pay for extra characters. If you want costumes and, like, fun emotes and stuff, you can pay for those. But I have not spent a cent.
00:35:32
Speaker
I've gotten myself a Daredevil nameplate. Okay. And then I've been just playing the game. It's honestly super fun. It's so annoying. It's really frustrating. but Dude, if you want to feel like Cyclops in a combat situation, they nailed it.
00:35:51
Speaker
Okay. All right. I love playing Cyclops. I love playing his gambit. He's got his judo. Like, is he judo? He doesn't. It's not really super useful. But he's got, like, little laser blasts, right? But they you shoot it they put they put that idea into it. They put, like, that level of detail where they were like, Cyclops doesn't know karate or boxing. He knows judo. You I yes, it's a very yeah it's like a horizontal chop he does when you do the melee attack. But OK, that's not that's not what Cyclops is for. You can shoot little blasts out of his eyes, right? Or you can shoot one long, continuous stream that banks off of all the walls and try to angle it at people. okay
00:36:33
Speaker
Or there's a special move you can use like every so often that does that for you. And it'll hit like multiple enemies when you fire a blast. at a They accounted for his mutant spatial geometry power.
00:36:48
Speaker
awesome Awesome. All right. I like that. i like I mean, I don't think I'd like this game at all, but I like You gotta try it. i I hated it when I first played it because it's so chaotic. Everybody moves so fast all the time. and it's I can't do online match games.
00:37:08
Speaker
like i can't I can't go up against people. i tried to do we Me and you, during the pandemic, we played some Fall Guys. Yes. um and that When I wasn't playing with you and my son and making fun of it,
00:37:22
Speaker
It was so frustrating. Like I just get so frustrated with other people's behavior yeah yeah and in match games. That's a very good X-Men related thing.
00:37:35
Speaker
Thank you. It is actually X-Men related. It is this week. But what about you, Matt? Did you do anything X-Men related this week? um I cut my finger pretty bad o with a serrated knife. I was doing a bagel and I was doing it sideways. and went And it's that thing with bagels where they're like kind of cut, but not really.
00:37:57
Speaker
you hit certain points and then the knife just flies through. Yes. And it went right into my cutting away from yourself. Well, i i I was doing it sideways, so my my finger, I had to hold it. i had to be holding it. You're supposed to do it up and down, but that gets so many crumbs everywhere.
00:38:15
Speaker
So I went right into my- Instead you decided to get blood everywhere. I went right into my finger, and I should have gotten stitches, but I didn't. But look, it's pretty it's pretty good.
00:38:26
Speaker
It's a little blurry, but it doesn't look like there's anything there. It's pretty healed. So the point is I'm like Wolverine. Yeah, that's fast. This happened this morning?
00:38:37
Speaker
yeah happened an hour ago. Wow. I
00:38:44
Speaker
think it could happened last weekend, but, or like last this past Monday. and he held really fast. He held really fast. i'm Wolverine is the thing. And i just keep discovering more and more superpowers as we do this episode.
00:38:58
Speaker
Remember that thing where I can make rubber stuff not get shredded? Yes, but but I so think I recall us debunking that as well. No, I don't think so. So, Patrick.
00:39:13
Speaker
Yeah.
00:39:16
Speaker
Do you want to read X-Men and Power Pack and stuff with me? Yeah, I e do. ah Yeah, Matt, why don't we start...
00:39:27
Speaker
By reading an X-Men comic. Oh, I'd love to. Uncanny X-Men number 194, Juggernauts Back in Town. Oh, boy.
X-Men Comic Exploration
00:39:37
Speaker
yeah Chris Claremont, writer, John Romita Jr., penciler, Dan Green, and Steve Lealoha, finishers, Glynis Oliver, colorist, Tom Orzakowski, letterer, And no senti editor. And it turns out his name was Jim Smudge, editor in chief.
00:39:53
Speaker
OK. All right. Yeah, because it's smudged on mine and I don't know why. Release date March 12th, 1985, cover date June 1985. So do you think Len Wein, who is a who's clearly a listener to this podcast? Yeah. Do you think he's really upset that you keep really hammering on the Oliver?
00:40:19
Speaker
Glynis Oliver. yeah Yeah. Do you think Len Wein's listening? And he's like, stop it. This was 40 years ago at this point. I'm sure he's he's over it. Who knows? Maybe not. It was one of the the most talented colorists of a generation.
00:40:34
Speaker
Yeah. If you lost the most talented colorist of a generation, boy, you'd be drinking about that forever.
00:40:43
Speaker
all right. Well, sorry to Len. Glynis Oliver. Uh-oh. Juggernaut's back in town, and all the news stations are broadcasting it, but the X-Men, tired as shit from all their recent fights, don't want to hear it. Yeah, they just don't want to fight him. They are. The news pops on in Nightcrawler's bedroom, and he's like, uh...
00:41:12
Speaker
Yeah, dude, what is this? Do they have a mechanism in their house whereby if an X-Men villain gets mentioned on the news, all their radios and TVs and stuff turn on?
00:41:23
Speaker
Because they're all sleeping and then suddenly they they wake up when it's like, Juggernaut is news. I would say you yes, probably wired into Cerebro. Everyone's television and radio is wired into Cerebro because the professor was tired of people not giving a shit. So he was like, all right, well, if y'all love your damn TVs and radios so much, maybe I'll just put Cerebro in there.
00:41:52
Speaker
Kids these days, they used to be all – they used to – sit When I was their age, I was out in a field playing with my mental powers, playing with my cerebro. And these days, everybody's on their damn TVs and radios.
00:42:08
Speaker
When when Rogue hears about it, she's nude in the shower and she and they they say that was a golden oldie by Nazgul. Another Nazgul reference.
00:42:19
Speaker
Oh, yeah. Another Nazgul. So that they must exist in the same universe. i guess so. i And then kurt We get a lot of little insights into oh yeah each person's life here. Kurt stayed up all night watching The Scarlet Pirate, which is not the first time he's mentioned that movie. Yeah, dude. He's just like, how many times you have to watch these fucking movies, man?
00:42:48
Speaker
These 1930s Errol Flynn movies. He's like, why did they have to play the Crimson Pirate at 2 a.m.? You've seen it. Yeah. You didn't have to stay up for this one. He's watching the the edited for cable version.
00:43:02
Speaker
ah Colossus is painting and doing doing. Well, no, I guess he was asleep, too. He's just his room is just paintings and it's always ready for painting and weights. But he, you know, Colossus is up through his jammies, ruins his damn jammies.
00:43:18
Speaker
I don't think he needs the weights.
00:43:22
Speaker
i Colossus is the one that Isn't trying to ignore it until, of course, Wolverine gets back from a jog and kicks them into gear. God. And Nightcrawler's like, do we have to? And Wolverine's like, nope. we know He says, nope, we never have to. Fuck, I love this guy. It's a good line. Yeah, yeah.
00:43:44
Speaker
Oh, God damn it. Chris Claremont put those puts those lines in his mouth all the time. Where it's like, people are like, I don't want to. And he's like, well, you don't have to, but that'll make you a bad person. And then they're like, fuck, I'll do it. Or like, or like a lot cooler if you did. Or I want to do this villainous thing. And he's like, that's your right.
00:44:03
Speaker
But I'm going to kill you if you do. Can I say yeah he never tells anyone what to do? It's so good. Can I say i don't think Wolverine needs to go for a jog.
00:44:20
Speaker
Meanwhile, in Kenya, a pair of blonde twins are on a safari when the brother Andreas begins to sexually harass a local server woman. Aurora Monroe appears in the doorway to defend her.
00:44:33
Speaker
A fight breaks out and she beats his ass plus his two bodyguards, causing the sister twin to level a pistol at her. Aurora throws a dagger and knocks it from the woman's hand, then grabs a hunting rifle, chasing the hunters off.
00:44:48
Speaker
The server woman bows as her goddess, the Windrider, has returned. Yeah, you kind of, you see, you read this and you're kind of like, okay, this is about Aurora returning to Africa and the way that people react.
00:45:04
Speaker
And you you you don't think you don't put too much thought into who these blonde hunters are. think use a racial slur here that made me say like, oh, these are really shitty people. They use we'll call it the K word. It is a common racial slur for South Africans in apartheid South Africa, like the you black South Africans, I guess you should say.
00:45:27
Speaker
So so you thought, oh, these are characters. Yes, these are people that have they're either characters or it's I mean, apartheid was raging at the time. So it was just like a chance to say, look how shitty these people are. Yeah, I think when I first read this, I didn't think like, oh, these people will be back. I thought they'll be back. I thought I thought these these are like this is an example of something.
00:45:53
Speaker
Back in New York, the X-Men stalk Cain Marco. Come on, guys. He's just doing normal guy stuff at the bank. The poor guy's trying to get a loan. Yeah, he's just he's just talking to the loan officer, just like, hey.
00:46:06
Speaker
All of them, except Colossus, are thankful to not had to have to fight him. When suddenly Nimrod appears, the pink and white robot blasts his way into the bank and announces that there's a criminal and two mutants on the premise. He blasts the civilian clothes off of Juggernaut and Kitty and Phoenix slip away through the floor. Juggernaut dons his helmet just before Nimrod flings him all the way across the town into a construction site.
00:46:36
Speaker
He flies after him, disintegrates an I-beam that Juggernaut is about to swing at him, and then collapses a pile of steel girders on his head. We see Nimrod calculate the exact amount of harm this will do to Juggernaut, zero, and the exact moment Juggernaut will emerge.
00:46:54
Speaker
This is intense. Yeah. It's a, it immediately you're just like, whoa, this guy Nimrod is a lot to, yes like he's got every superpower. Oh, he's a guy with every superpower. Fuck.
00:47:09
Speaker
So this is the first glimpse we get at Nimrod as a powerful being, right? We've seen a couple of just like suggestions that he doesn't like mutants and he's from the future. This is the first time we see him in action.
00:47:23
Speaker
Mm-hmm. I, this is very rare, Matt, and this is why I'm mentioning it. I know something about Nimrod that you do not.
00:47:33
Speaker
I'm sure there's a lot of things about Nimrod you know that I don't. But he's actually a huge part of the Jonathan Hickman House of X, Powers of X run. Oh, okay.
00:47:45
Speaker
And I don't think that's any sort of spoiler. He's just he's part of it. yeah And he... i and He's pretty integral to the plot. So you might be thinking this idiot, Pat Reber, doesn't know who the fuck this is.
00:48:02
Speaker
You would be wrong. Damn it. Damn That's right. i'm so i'm so I feel so stupid. All right. A couple of things. Thank you. He calls Shadowcat Ariel.
00:48:15
Speaker
Yes. Which means... You remember the old adage, Matt, if her name is Ariel, she's not in your carry all of canon X-Men stories.
00:48:32
Speaker
Which means we know he's from a future. remember that you goter How could i not remember it? He got disrupted in his travel in time. He's coming from a non-canon future. This is how we prove it. He's from a non-canon for future. Yeah. um Phoenix is here.
00:48:52
Speaker
She's looking ah like John Constantine with a rat tail. Yeah. She's wearing like ah like a green trench coat and khaki pants and a white shirt and a black tie.
00:49:04
Speaker
And like spiky hair like he had back in the 80s. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. You could. If you took if you changed the lipstick to just like a ah like a a ah frown and put a cigarette in it and change the red to blonde and erase the rat tail, you would be like, oh, it's John Constantine. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. Which is great. I love this look for her.
00:49:28
Speaker
At this moment, the X-Men rush in. All of them, except Colossus, are unsure of whose side to take, but Nimrod fixes that by blasting Nightcrawler and Colossus on sight. He's also like, he's like 95% chance Nightcrawler will pop up here and then yeah zaps that spot. So when he when he un-teleports, he's...
00:49:52
Speaker
Yeah. He's zapped right away. He's taken the table. What we're seeing is like, this guy is scary, right? Like this guy is, this guy could kill the X-Men. Yes. Like they are not, they could, they will not win this fight.
00:50:06
Speaker
Exactly. And that it's all calculated too. This isn't just pure power. This is him knowing what's going to happen and, and tactically. tacticizing around it he's tacticizing guys he's tacticizing is the problem and that that's the one thing the x-men can't guard guy guard can't guard against can't guard against is they're also tactitizers yeah they're like hey the tacticizers have become the
00:50:39
Speaker
rogue fastball specials Wolverine into the robot, but he bounces off Nimrod's invisible force field. hu Nimrod calculates 93 seconds until Wolverine's healing factor picks him back up again, and so has 93 seconds to kill Juggernaut.
00:50:56
Speaker
Nimrod knocks his helmet off and hits him with a concentrated sonic blast. Damn. He's still wearing a second helmet under his first helmet. Yeah. is This is just canon now. This is just how he rolls forever.
00:51:10
Speaker
He does get, we get a Black Tom mention because he's like, Black Tom told me no one could ever remove my helmet again. yeah how would Black Tom know? yes don You gotta stop listening to this guy. Kitty rushes in to help her fallen teammates, incurring a blast from Nimrod, which she phases through. She rushes him and tries to disrupt his electronics by phasing into him, but finds herself thrown back by his energy field.
00:51:38
Speaker
Using her telekinesis, Phoenix protects Kitty and Rogue with a force field and then drops the whole skeleton of the construction site onto Nimrod and Juggernaut. Damn, Phoenix!
00:51:51
Speaker
Kitty, almost totally paralyzed from Nimrod's energy field, leans her head into Rogue to transfer her knowledge that Nimrod is actually just a robot. this is This is very cool. Because Rogue is like, well, that ought to take care of that. And Kitty is like, no, absolutely not. Like, just figure it out. There's not a person inside this. Like, this guy is way more dangerous than we initially thought. But isn't...
00:52:20
Speaker
doesn't have the life energy inside of her to actually say the words. So she just like headbutts rogue to transfer her yeah memories and thoughts over. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Really neat. We haven't seen that yet.
00:52:35
Speaker
There's also here there's a there's a there's a scene where there's a bunch of there's just like bricks right in the foreground. There's like bricks as Phoenix is tearing down the the the yeah structure and there's graffiti on the bricks. And one of the things of the brick says Dean Cool Shoes.
00:52:56
Speaker
It says Dean Cool cool cool Shoes. Now, is that a man with the first name of Dean or is that like somebody important at a college? Yeah, yeah, is it? is it they Or, yeah, this is a student and they really like the their Dean's awesome shoes. And so they call him as ah as his nickname, hey, Dean Cool Shoes. Or they hate his shoes and it's a they're mocking him.
00:53:24
Speaker
its like the local goody two-shoes group being like, all right, guys, we're going to do something really nice for the Dean, but it's got to be cool. Dean's walking to work and he's like,
00:53:36
Speaker
de cool shoes and he looks down and he's like oh really all right i feel good about myself i've made it i've made it also it's very funny there's a very brief very funny moment after rogue absorbs kitty's powers where she's like oh i can phase i've never done that before this is neat ah i can't believe i'm saying neat kitty you fucking nerd ah So Rogue grabs powers from the unconscious Nightcrawler and Colossus lying next to her. She grabs Nimrod's arm and teleports it off of his body. Fuck, man.
00:54:17
Speaker
Then punches him so hard he explodes. Wow. Yeah. That's... it This is so cool. we We have sort of seen this before her absorbing a bunch of powers and becoming an amalgam of different X-Men, but it's never not fucking fair. Yeah, it rolls. She destroys her costume when she does this. And I think we're going to have to start counting these two.
00:54:42
Speaker
This is what this is like the third time so far. She mentions it every time. Oh, my costume. room I got to go buy a new. I just bought this one. So I'm going to say this is number three.
00:54:54
Speaker
So we're going to start the count here. We'll start it at three. Nimrod instantly starts pulling himself back together again. Unbeatable. An unbeatable villain. Unreal. Yeah. But he teleports away.
00:55:09
Speaker
Juggernaut picks himself up and asks Rogue if he's going to have to fight the X-Men next. But Rogue tells him this wasn't his fault. He should scram before the Avengers show up.
00:55:20
Speaker
I love this. And this is why we love Rogue, right? Because every any other X-Man would have been like, you scumbag, we're watching you. In fact, they just did that. Wolverine and Colossus were both like, we're going to go fucking get this guy at the bank while he just tries to go about his daily life. but Well, I think Wolverine would have let him go here too. But he would have been like,
00:55:43
Speaker
Yeah, you can go, but I got my eye on you. Don't step out of line or I'll snick you. Is a little more empathetic, I think.
00:55:54
Speaker
And she's like, you didn't do anything wrong here. This guy was coming after you. You should get out of here before the Avengers get here because we're all villains here. We're all villains here, pal. Yeah, yeah. Look, I'm not a cop.
00:56:10
Speaker
As the X-Men gather themselves, they see that the media has shown up. So they decide to leave through the Morlock tunnels below. no but Good that they have this just a little device. Yeah, remember that.
00:56:21
Speaker
Cut to Moscow, where a Colonel Vashen is briefed on the situation. The media sees it as the X-Men aiding Juggernaut against a new hero named Nimrod. A new hero named Nimrod. Yeah.
00:56:37
Speaker
Vashen is confused as to why the Americans would turn on the X-Men so suddenly, worries that this is proving Magneto right, and that Armageddon is near. The end.
00:56:50
Speaker
Yeah, that's an interesting little scene. What did you take how what did you take from the Colonel Vashin scene? I don't know who this guy is. I assume that he's going to be important. But what I'm remembering... Nick Fury with the opposite eye patch, I think. Sure. He's, I guess, like a Soviet Nick Fury. I guess so What I am... The connection I'm drawing here is that this was forever ago at this point, but Sebastian Shaw...
00:57:20
Speaker
was talking about say, and I think, uh, Emma Frost were talking about how important mutants will be to national powers in the near future and how they have to try to like, everybody should be trying to control mutants so that they can use them ah because that'll be the basis for power is like, I guess, military use.
00:57:44
Speaker
This strikes me as somebody who was like, hey, let's keep all the mutants happy so that we can gain some power over them. And it's now panicking because the mutants seem to be very unhappy.
00:57:58
Speaker
Yeah, I could be way off. that's that's That was my read on it. I don't know. Yeah, i like I just went to his Marvel wiki page, and it's weird, man.
00:58:11
Speaker
I don't really know what's going on with this guy. all right the The last time we saw him was ah when Arcade brought him to Brainwash Colossus, but that was of of and an Android version of him.
00:58:27
Speaker
So when he turned Colossus into the proletariat. I see. This is somebody from Colossus's past potentially then. um I don't know. I don't know. i don't know, man.
00:58:40
Speaker
Colonel Vashin. Colonel Vashin. We'll see if we ever see him again. and I like i I'm not being coy. I i literally don't know. Before we move on, can I say...
00:58:54
Speaker
The cover, and I think this will be consistent, actually. Covers for the issues that we're reading today are fucking sick. They're very cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This one is, was immediately intrigued. Nimrod killing Juggernaut and Rogue with Nightcrawler's face, Colossus's skin, just sitting there on the, like, am opening this comic. There is so much happening here. Need to know why. Yeah.
00:59:21
Speaker
Well, Pat, I normally would read a comic here to you. Yeah. But I'm going to ask you to read the next comic to me. Fuck. It's Power Pack number 11. Can you tell me what happens in that comic book? Yeah, Matt. Why don't you sit back? Okay.
00:59:38
Speaker
Relax. I'm right. Take a look. You've been working very hard. Thank you. While I read you Power Pack number 11, Problems. problems
00:59:48
Speaker
Louise Simonson, writer, June Brigman, penciler, Bob Wyacek. I like June Brigman's art. Yeah, yeah. this It's fun. It's very yeah there. Let me say there are some panels that I look at and I say, look yeah why did you do that? But but it's it's the most part. It's clean. It's colorful. It's cool. Like, it's just it's. Yeah, I like it. Yeah, yeah. I think the inks are a perfect match for it, too.
01:00:12
Speaker
ah Bob Wyacek, of course, inks. Christy Shield color, Joe Rosen letter, Carl Potts editor and Jim Smudge editor in chief. Yeah, my copy is smudged.
01:00:24
Speaker
Release date March 5th, 1985. Cover date June 1985. This is to be a quick one, Matt. Okay. The power pack are cleaning up their house, each using their special
Power Pack Adventures and Lessons
01:00:34
Speaker
powers. Alex is using his gravity powers to float up and dust the bookcases.
01:00:39
Speaker
Katie is dissolving the trash with her energy powers. Everybody's mad about that one, which I don't understand. Yeah. How dare you? Everyone's always mad when Katie uses her powers. Yeah, yeah.
01:00:50
Speaker
Julie is, su I guess it's because she's five and if if she does it too much, it makes her throw up, which if you've ever been around a five-year-old that has one thing that makes them throw up, they just, they love doing that thing. ah They're just like, they're like, you're gonna blow everything up. And she's like, no, I'm not, Katie.
01:01:10
Speaker
if <unk> it We know you.
01:01:14
Speaker
Uh, Julie is super speed flying around and Jack, well, Jack can't figure out how to use his density powers to help him at all. Yeah. He's just like, I can't pick up books when I'm gas and like that. Nothing's nothing's helping.
01:01:29
Speaker
So he just doesn't. Yeah, he just doesn't. When they're done, Alex goes up to practice flying using fire extinguishers to propel his weightless body around. But.
01:01:40
Speaker
They run out of juice super fast. They're in New York at this point, by the way. They've moved to New York City in yeah like a third floor walk up apartment. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:01:51
Speaker
this is a great idea, but the flaw is laid out right here. fire extinguished Fire extinguishers don't have enough juice and they are expensive to replace. This is what I fucking love about Louise Simonson's writing in Power Pack is she makes them all stupid kids, right? Yes. Like they just keep having ideas that are bad. And half the time, um because you know, in ah in a comic book, when somebody lays out a plan,
01:02:17
Speaker
Generally, and like in in this time he does actually use the fire extinguishers, but there's a bunch of stuff we're skipping over here where one a member of Power Pack lay out a plan. And usually in comic books, when when a character lays out a plan,
01:02:31
Speaker
You can expect to see that happen. Only things go wrong. Yeah. It's just to let us know what's supposed to happen before the ah the factors kick in. In Power Pack, people lay out plans all the time and then another kid will be like, that's stupid.
01:02:45
Speaker
that's a bad idea. We'll get electrocuted. exactly The last time we did that, somebody died. Don't we can't do that again. yeah And they're OK, it's so good. There's also there's so many little lessons taught all through this. Right. yeah Just like, hey, kids, don't do this thing. It's dangerous. One of them here is don't don't play with fire extinguishers. They're expensive.
01:03:10
Speaker
like we kind of need them and they run out really fast. Yeah. Yeah. He tries to get Julie to buy him more, but she refuses because it's her money and the idea is stupid anyway.
01:03:21
Speaker
Yeah. There's also there's a whole lesson on what whether it's okay to go through other kids piggy banks. Jack shrinks down into little Jack and goes into his incredible Hulk piggy bank. And he has one quarter. That is his size.
01:03:42
Speaker
um That's, I mean, 1985 to be ah what a ah six, seven year old kid that has 25 cents. Holy shit, man. You can get like 50 candies for that.
01:03:54
Speaker
yes The next day, they're walking home from school when they see a cat with a can tied to its tail running to the sewers. They decide to chase it and save it, only to find that the rain has made the sewer water rise. Here's another lesson for kids.
01:04:12
Speaker
Right. They play in the sewers. They are made for drape. Like, if the rain comes while you're yeah in the sewers, you could very well get washed away or drowned. Well, here's here's a thing, and here's another ah lesson and bad idea thing, where Katie goes to absorb the sewer water to energize herself and like start glowing so they can see in the sewer. And everyone's like, that's gross, don't touch the sewer water, you'll probably catch something. And she's like, no I won't, because I'll disintegrate all the germs too.
01:04:45
Speaker
i that she's not wrong no she's not wrong she's that but it is like a lesson like guys sewer water is kids sewer water is full of germs there's a difference between running water and wastewater yeah and there's a difference between you and katie power yeah ah It sweeps them up and knocks them around, putting them in the path of a pack of alligators. The old New York City sewer alligators. Yeah.
01:05:13
Speaker
We should mention, before they actually enter the sewer, when they're like watching this cat run in and deciding if they should save it, a fucking cop shows up. Oh, yeah. And is like, ah that cat's probably dead. There are alligators down there that will eat it.
01:05:33
Speaker
like some hope this guy tri They're like, we were just, they're like, what are you doing by the sewer? Well, we lost ah our cat down here. And he's like, yeah, probably got drowned and eaten by alligators. Go home.
01:05:46
Speaker
Probably dead. And then he says, yeah, go home. It's raining. Is that a lawful order? yeah You have the authority to tell these kids they're not allowed to be in the rain? ah
01:05:59
Speaker
And they're like, there's not alligators in the sewer. Come on. But Matt, whoops, there are. Yeah. I. Katie and Alex get separated from the other two. So they decide to go back to their apartment and steal the super's fire extinguishers to help them fly.
01:06:18
Speaker
Yeah. They go back. You know, the problem with this, you know, the problem with why we're all getting killed in the sewer is we don't have and any fire extinguishers. don't have fire extinguishers. Solves so many problems.
01:06:31
Speaker
They go back, find their siblings, beat up the alligators, save the cat and escape the sewers. Okay. Good for them. ah Some of the alligators, I'll say, have collars on them. Yes, that is something that the narrator notes the kids didn't necessarily notice. I think Julie mentions it, but she might not mention it until way later or the next issue. Okay.
01:06:55
Speaker
Back at home, Alex apologizes to Julie for trying to take her money, but Julie apologizes to Alex, saying she'll pay for the Super's fire extinguishers. Then...
01:07:06
Speaker
Katie remembers they forgot their school books in the sewer. Oh no. I'd be fine with that. ah Below ground, a cloaked figure plays a flute for their alligator pets and stumbles upon the power's school books.
01:07:25
Speaker
They're good kids. They'll be back for these. And we'll be waiting, they say. they make They'll make such delightful Morlocks. Oh no! so To be continued.
01:07:37
Speaker
Man, the the funny things about Power Pack are number one, how much they complain about how their powers suck. Like, oh, man, this power sucks. And I wish it was better because it sucks. um Especially Jack and Alex are like, man, if only this power didn't suck so bad.
01:07:56
Speaker
Yeah. I mean, they're not wrong. ah And number two is like them constantly having bad ideas. Like, again, it's not enjoyable to read Power Pack.
01:08:08
Speaker
But no, but it's such a good comic book. Yeah. There's something so fascinating about it, but fascinating, but not engaging.
01:08:19
Speaker
Yes, exactly. Exactly. And it's like really well written, but not, not all that fun because kids, because the kids are written so realistically and kids aren't,
01:08:34
Speaker
They don't make good protagonists. Yeah. Kids aren't actually interesting. They're mostly annoying. Mostly just yell at each other and call each other names. And just like, they talk a lot.
01:08:46
Speaker
Oh, hey, happy Father's Day, Matt. Oh, thank you. hey Hey, thanks. They talk a lot, man. They talk so much in these comics. Oh, I thought you just meant kids in general. Well, they do, but also power pack.
01:08:59
Speaker
Speaking of, do you want me to tell you about the next Power Pack, Power Pack number 12? Oh, we got to still read Power Pack. Okay. Yeah, sure. It's called Underground, and it's written by Louise Simonson. It's penciled by June Brigman. It's inked by Bob Wyachek. It's colored by Glynis Oliver. It's a lettered by Joe Rosen. It's edited by Carl Potts. And the editor-in-chief is Jim Fuck.
01:09:18
Speaker
It says Jim Fuck in my copy. Huh. Mine's smudged, so. Okay. ah Release date, April 2nd, 1985. Cover date, July And the power pack make their way right back to the sewer where they were just in imminent danger to recover the textbooks they stupidly left down there last issue.
01:09:41
Speaker
they's so They've also got the cat with them, ah the cat from last issue, because their mom's allergic, so they're not allowed to keep him. Immediately, they're confronted by a group of weirdos calling themselves Morlocks, promising to kidnap them for Anna No.
01:09:58
Speaker
do they in They don't introduce themselves here, do they? Not here, no. No, not until they fight, because we'll have a lot to talk about there. Yes, we will. Yeah, promising to kidnap them for Anna Lee.
01:10:11
Speaker
Do you remember? And all these kids died, and so they're like, yeah we'll get you some new kids. remember We talked about it 10 minutes ago. Across the sewer system, Kitty and Kurt make their way through the Morlock Tunnels to get back home from X-Men 194.
01:10:30
Speaker
Stopping along the way to deliver a letter from Aurora to Callisto oh and a gift from Japan... From Kitty for Caliban. It's just a shirt that says sushi.
01:10:43
Speaker
It's adorable. It is a love. this It's a sweatshirt, but it's like short sleeved. It's cut off like at the shoulders. Yeah. i And yet just says sushi on it and bright red letters. She clearly picked it up from Japan.
01:10:58
Speaker
Here, where she's giving the gift to Caliban, there's a crowd of Morlocks behind them, and there is a woman who looks exactly like Storm in the crowd. There's always a woman. There's always one Morlock that looks exactly like Storm. Yeah, is wearing the belts, is ah has ah white mohawk, dark skin. like It is just that Storm. There's Storm standing there. And and that character is saying, so, Cal, what's Storm say? Yeah.
01:11:26
Speaker
You have to imagine. i think that actually tracks because you have to imagine there's at least a few more locks that were like, oh, shit. this is the I thought Callisto was the coolest. This is the coolest woman I've ever seen.
01:11:38
Speaker
I just started trying to look as much like her and probably ask all the time, like, hey, Callisto, what's Storm doing? Is she writing? ah So what is this kitty costume? I've never seen it before. I don't think we'll ever see it again. it is. All right, Pat.
01:11:55
Speaker
I'm going try and describe this. You fill in what I'm missing. Yeah, yeah sure. It is a bright orange trench coat that turns into a leotard on the bottom.
01:12:06
Speaker
Like on the top, it's trench coat, and then it comes down to like a leotard.
01:12:13
Speaker
ah below her waist you see it as a separate or as like one piece that costume because it's the exact same color and there's a belt in the middle but it's just ah a white piece of fabric like a white ribbon Yeah, I guess it it's like, imagine a trench coat from the waist up, but from the waist down, it's a one-piece bathing suit.
01:12:36
Speaker
Yeah, it's just like a bikini bottom. And then she's got yellow leggings under that. Yeah. That go down into orange boots. And they all plays they were, Uggs didn't exist at the time, but they look like Uggs. They look like Uggs. Chunky, soft boots.
01:12:53
Speaker
But an under her yellow trench coat leotard, she's wearing... I think, I can't tell if she's wearing a... It's a scarf. She's got pieces of white fabric. One wrapped around her neck and the other tied around her waist. in it what It looks both like a scarf and a turtleneck, though.
01:13:13
Speaker
That's what I can't tell there. Well, I think that's just... That's, you know, when you wrap a scarf around your neck. But it's wrapped around so many times then. It must be wrapped around like 20 times. It's just, it's a weird outfit. I don't hate it, but it's fucking weird.
01:13:30
Speaker
So she gives this gift Caliban. Everything's cordial. They're all friends. And Callisto even has a little crush on Kurt. It's cute. who Who doesn't have a little crush on Kurt? But back on the other side of the sewers, the power kids are fighting to escape.
01:13:45
Speaker
But Erg? tell we tell everybody about earth We'll tell everybody about each character. Urg absorbs energy and then shoots it from his eye. He has one eye that can shoot energy.
01:13:58
Speaker
yeah ah Yeah, his other eye normal. His energy eye under an eye patch. Yes. And he's got hair that sticks straight up like Legion. Yeah. he And he's dressed like a like what Marvel Comics thinks a punk dresses like. Yeah. Ape.
01:14:15
Speaker
Ape. Not an ape, but actually ah essentially just plastic man. He can just turn into anything that he wants. Yeah, if he thinks of it, but he's too dumb to think of stuff, so he has to have other people tell him what turn into. That's right.
01:14:29
Speaker
ah Piper. Piper, we just met. He's dressed like a pirate, but he plays a flute. but He's dressed like a fancy pirate, right? Yeah, yeah. Big coat and the regalia and stuff. But but a beret, a beret also. But a beret. He plays a flute and it commands animals in the sewers. So he' he's the Pied Piper, but with any animal he wants to be.
01:14:54
Speaker
All right, and then this is where... ah All right. ah Apologies in advance, everybody. The last person is named Tar Baby. Yeah. So...
01:15:06
Speaker
Let's talk about the tar baby for a second. Please. Because this is a very complicated term. You could just write it off as racist and that is fine. ah You should never say it. You should never culturally reference it like this. Because at this point in history, it
Folktale Origins and Controversies
01:15:24
Speaker
is just racist. But...
01:15:26
Speaker
ah It comes from an old folktale that was supposedly prevalent in the black American South. There's some controversy about that um because it's an Uncle Remus tale. Do you know about the Uncle Remus tales? ah Yes, but...
01:15:41
Speaker
Should we expand on those as well? So it's like Br'er Rabbit and Br'er Bear and Br'er Fox, I think. This was a storybook written in 1881. Uncle Remus is a fictional character, a fictional black like old man character who tells tales, but it's a white person writing about folk tales, black folk tales in the American South. And it's mostly about these, these, these like animal characters and black and rare rabbit is like a trickster. And, and then there's rare Fox and rare bear who are like rare rabbits enemies.
01:16:18
Speaker
So what we're saying is that don't, we The reason that this may be considered, or I guess what we're saying is what's controversial about it supposedly originating or supposedly being in the eu black American South is that the sources for it weren't actually written by black people. These are stories like Uncle Remus where a white person said,
01:16:47
Speaker
here's what black people talk about. Yes. And so, and the uncle Remus stuff is, it was like really often used for ah minstrel shows and black caricatures and people wearing black face. And so like ah the tar baby is uh,
01:17:06
Speaker
is one of these these racist black theater caricatures. But I'll tell the story real quick. it's a trick So this was actually, I mean, this is a storied folktale, right? Like in the Arne Thompson Index of Tale Types, it's number 175. Let me let me read it real quick out of my...
01:17:32
Speaker
Stith Thompson book. Yeah, and that gets to be a real anthropologist here. It's called it's just called The Tar Baby and the Rabbit. um And the story is a trickster, usually a rabbit or a jackal, or a monkey is suspected of stealing. So somebody shapes a baby out of pine tar or...
01:17:48
Speaker
some other sticky black substance and leans it against a tree ah with usually sometimes with a bowl of food and the trickster comes to steal it, it gets stuck to the baby and the more it struggles to get free, the more stuck it becomes. Or in the case of the Uncle Remus tale, I think Br'er Rabbit tries to talk to the baby and when it doesn't respond, he gets mad and starts kicking it and that's how he gets stuck to the baby. yeah yeah ah When the trapper...
01:18:14
Speaker
ah The person who made the trap comes to kill the thief. The thief talks their way out of it. That's the story. ah similar Similar tales are found in the Jitka. It's also found in Africa and Mexico. Like this is a very far, like this is a tale that spread far and wide. So it probably was in the American black South. The problem is, like you said, in Uncle Remus, this tale is not from the mouth of a black person. It is from the the pen of a white person. Right. And that's also where it kind of took a an actually racist turn, right? That's where yeah it first was used in sort of a racial context around black people.
01:18:59
Speaker
Yes. So it's a cool story. And it is an interesting folktale. So it's not inherently racist, but because of its association with Uncle Remus and because of its association, and yeah it it also just became a slur, right? yeah It also just became a thing people called people. I think in that um Richard Pryor Chevy Chase sketch in early SNL, I think he yells it at him.
01:19:25
Speaker
Right, because it's something you're allowed to say on television. Yeah. Well, I mean, he says all of the slurs in that sketch that you're not allowed to say on television, too. That's but true. But yeah, it's fucking racist. yeah I don't think you'd be allowed to say it on television. You probably wouldn't be able to say it on television now. But it's fucking racist. um And it is really weird for Louise Simonson to put this character here.
01:19:48
Speaker
yeah Like. 1985. The context there. hmm.
01:19:55
Speaker
the context is there Does she just not know? i wonder if she was just told this story as a kid, and so she knows the story of our baby, and so she's just like, oh, it would be a cool power for somebody to have things stick to them.
01:20:15
Speaker
Yeah, it's so it's so bizarre. Yes. to with I mean, it was shocking to just read this and...
01:20:27
Speaker
I know this isn't the last we're going to see this character. So correct. Yeah, it'll probably shock me again. But at the same time, there's nothing racially motivated here. It was tough for me to tell what race this character is supposed to be. Their hair, which is the actual tar substance, is shaped a bit like dreadlocks. Yes.
01:20:50
Speaker
Which, if this character is white, which their skin tone in this makes it look like. Kind of suggests, yeah, yeah. Yeah. That's worse, right? Because that means that they are aware of the racial connotations and chose to, do you know what i mean? Like, they chose to reference it with the hairstyle.
01:21:11
Speaker
Yeah, but there's i mean, there is nothing pertaining to race in the rest of these comics around it. Correct. Which is what makes me think like or maybe I'm I'm giving her too much the benefit of the doubt here, but makes me think that she didn't want to just name a character after a racial slur.
01:21:31
Speaker
I just don't think she knows it's a racial slur. Yeah. So this character will pop up again in the next couple years a few times um in Power Pack and X Factor.
01:21:42
Speaker
And then it goes away, thankfully. He goes away for 16 years. Okay. And then has one more appearance ever. so i would I would love to not have to confront this again. Hopefully it's just like a... yeah Like when your grandma has a racist name for a chestnut or something like you did you didn't realize because you heard it your whole life until somebody was like, hey, that's that's pretty blatantly racist. And then you were like, fuck.
01:22:15
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. ah So all now now you have all that context. So, you know, erg, ape, Piper and Tar Baby are two powerful people.
01:22:27
Speaker
For the power kids. We'll get back into the story. Unless you have more to say. No. Okay. They nab the kids and march them down to Annalise's room. Coming just close enough to Callisto. Walking Kurt and Kitty out.
01:22:40
Speaker
For Kurt to catch a glimpse of what he was pretty sure. Were kidnapped children. right Good instincts Kurt. not going to stand for that. After they say their goodbyes. Kurt gives Kitty a heads up. And the two go to investigate.
01:22:54
Speaker
Deep in the tunnels, the power pack kids put up a fight against their captors, but ultimately lose when their powers just... disappear. Hey, wait. Don't we know somebody in the Morlock tunnels that makes powers disappear?
01:23:07
Speaker
Oh my god, we do. Do you think this is... Whoa. Ugh. i i bet i bet I bet not. I bet this is something else. I don't know. i don' What am I saying? I bet Not. They're brought straight to Anna Lee, who promises them they'll love her once Beautiful Dreamer rewrites their memories.
01:23:30
Speaker
mean So we're getting a whole new score of Morlocks
Morlock Tunnels and Power Pack Crossover
01:23:34
Speaker
here. I know. this is and they have pretty, like... creative powers creative powers they have unique looks they have interesting names um yeah they store the kids in a room with leech leech remember him whose power is to sap their powers and was fallen in love with the cat they brought down just instantly he's just like hey he's like hugs it and he's cuddling a kitten and the kitten loves him Everybody's talking so much shit about him this whole issue. God, yeah. It's so sad. It's so sad to be Leech.
01:24:08
Speaker
Everybody's just like, ah, this fucking kid sucks. hate this kid. Get rid of this fucking kid. Why does this kid have to be around? We have to keep this kid. they they They have to keep the kid around to keep Anna Lee's powers in check, but they don't want him around because he sucks. Right. And they they say it in front of him. like yeah They have no shame about him hearing this too. Yeah.
01:24:28
Speaker
It's fucked up. um kitty and kurt discover the door to this room but get pretty suspicious when kitty realizes leech must be here she can't phase through the door o hope's not lost though on the other side of the door jack has used his cub scout skills to loosen everyone's knots and it's he's the storm of power pack is it right he's got the thief skills yeah And then when Mask, remember him, comes in promising to change their faces, they burst free.
01:25:03
Speaker
Julie grabs the cat and starts running. Leech running behind her with a very sad, no, lonely. Lonely. No. Oh, my God. He's so adorable. How can people hate this guy It's like, yeah, it's like sad, adorable. Like not in a, I guess sort of in a pity way, but it's just like,
01:25:23
Speaker
You just you want to give him a hug. She grabs the cat and runs away. These two panels and he goes, no, lonely. Come back and chases her. it's you It's a brilliant move, honestly. Oh, my God. it It's like in the it hits you in the chest. Sweet little guy. ah Everyone else's powers start working again and Kitty and Kurt burst in the room. There's a big silly chaotic fight with Pac-Man and a swarm of bats. Tar Baby tells Ape to turn into Pac-Man. Tar Baby also only speaks in rhymes.
01:25:54
Speaker
Oh, yeah, that was strange. Strange. A thing I hate about characters, if you're not Jason Bludge, don't speak in rhymes. Right, if you don't have, like, a curse that makes you do it, yeah what do you do? yeah ah So there's swarm bats until everyone's power suddenly, oh yeah, Piper summons bats instead of alligators, too. um Suddenly, everybody's power stopped working again.
01:26:17
Speaker
Julie calmly walks back in the room with Leech and the cat, saying everyone should stop fighting and have a chat. Oh. She expresses sympathy for Annalee.
01:26:30
Speaker
After hearing about what happened from Leech, but she's got to understand, they're not her children. Their parents would be just as sad as she is if they if the if if the Power Pack kids go missing.
01:26:46
Speaker
They suggest she take care of Leech since he's so alone down here, but Annalise Annalise says, no way, he's too ugly, and everyone in the room quietly agrees. It's so fuck like He's standing right there. hus Just like sadly petting this cat.
01:27:03
Speaker
No, he's just petting a cat. He just wants to be loved. this fucking God. no he's too ugly to be my kid. oh But more importantly, she seems to reluctantly let them go.
01:27:16
Speaker
To help cheer Leech up, they let him keep the kitten. Solomon, two birds with one stone. Yeah. yeah Piper begs Curt and Katie not to tell Callisto. They gotta understand Annalise's psychic misery was literally driving them mad. It's all they could think to do. Because that's, we haven't, I don't know that we've fully, Annalise's power is whatever emotion she's feeling projects outward from her. Yeah, yeah. It's like the like the opposite of an empath. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And not Empath the character, but Anne Empath. yes. the The opposite of... And not in Empath like in real life. The power Empath.
01:27:58
Speaker
The X-Men and Power Pack take pity on them since they seem to have learned their lesson. The Power Pack return home and settle into their beds peacefully, save Katie who's a little scared of the approaching storm.
01:28:10
Speaker
But outside, Annalie peers up at their window, promising they'll be hers forever soon to be continued. So. i do appreciate that we get the immediate turnaround from letting someone go because they probably learned their lesson to having to deal with that problem. Yeah, this it is finally end of the issue. She is back at it. And we don't really get a panel where she's like, hey, you're right to to Julie's empathetic, inspiring speech. She just runs away crying.
01:28:47
Speaker
And the the argument they give is is. Wouldn't the way that you're sad when your kids are lost, wouldn't our parents be sad if they they knew they lost their kids?
01:29:02
Speaker
Which is interesting. It's a it's a in a logic argument. Anna Lee is not in a place to respond to logic right now. Well, isn't she?
01:29:14
Speaker
Because I think she responds to it pretty directly in the next issue. Maybe we should get into that, Matt. First, I want to talk about people's powers real quick. Because, number one, ape can turn into anything.
01:29:28
Speaker
Anything. What are the limits there? Can you turn into the universe? Yeah. Huh. How could, like, what are the limits to i could turn into anything? He's a big guy, and it seems restricted to sort of the outer limits of his frame. So like Plastic Man, so you said Plastic Man, which I hadn't thought of before, but yeah, maybe that's what you should think. He is he turns into a jar to capture the children. So they are he's he is a glass jar with a face and he turns his face into a funnel to suck Jack into the jar. Yeah. When he when Jack turns into gas and then yeah he he transforms himself jack into Pac-Man for the gas Jack smells like.
01:30:15
Speaker
Probably like a child. Like he probably smells a lot like peanut butter. you Imagine like vaporized child smell like that. Overwhelming. They've been drinking juice all day. you yeah They're always eating peanut butter.
01:30:30
Speaker
If it's peanut butter, it's sugar, it's sweat, it's not being able to properly bathe in bathroom. like Yeah, yeah. Sweat without the hormones in it, so it's just like salt. Yeah, you're just like... well So, ah other thing I want to talk about is mask actually we'll talk more about mask next issue because we'll see some more mask but just remember he's fucked up this guy hate this guy mask he every time we've seen him he has been delighting and torturing children that seems to be his kick he's like hello i can't wait to fuck up this little kid's face
01:31:13
Speaker
all right, so this next issue is is Uncanny X-Men. It's Uncanny X-Men 195. And one might say the cover goes a little too hard. Oh, my God.
01:31:24
Speaker
Is Wolverine going to kill the power pack? It's a Bilsenkevich cover. And Wolverine is holding Katie Power by her costume. Like,
01:31:36
Speaker
Up in the air. Up in the air. he's got his face sort of His height. He's smoking a cigarette. The smoke's going in Katie's face. She looks fucking terrified. And he's got all of his claws out like he's going to impale a little girl. Yeah, like retracted and aiming at her stomach.
01:31:53
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. He's like, I'm going to gut a little girl and blow smoke in her face as she dies. And while the rest of the power pack watches terrified. They're like, no!
01:32:05
Speaker
So good. ah So ah Chris Claremont's the writer. John Romita Jr.'s the artist. Dan Green is the other artist. Tom Morzikowski's letter. Glynis Oliver's the colorist. Anu Senti's the editor. And fuck shooter is what it says here as editor-in-chief.
01:32:20
Speaker
Mine says Jim Smudge. It says the name Smudge? Jim Smudge. Release date April 1985. Cover date July The Power Pack are awakened in the middle of the night.
01:32:35
Speaker
I thought this was an X-Men comic. But nope. All four of them are sleeping in bed with their parents because they're scared of the storm. Dude, Alex, you're fucking, what were you, 12? You're too old. You're like four and a half feet tall. You are way too old to be sleeping. again yeah Arguably so is Julie. Arguably so is Jack. But but ah Alex. Especially Alex. Alex, come on, man. and This is, I do think it's really cute that Because this is ah a direct continuation of the of Power Pack number 12. At the end of Power Pack 12, they're all settling into bed. Alex mentions that there's a storm coming and she's a little scared. And then we open X-Men 195 that evening as they all sleep together in bed because they're scared of this storm.
01:33:27
Speaker
Yeah. And it's gotten really intense. So this is like hours later. Right. When their parents wake up, though, they're scared, too, of the four strange children in their bed. They never had children.
01:33:41
Speaker
There are no toys or children's furniture in the house. How did these kids even get in here? When they discuss calling the welfare police, the kids obviously confused and scared. Get the hell out of here.
01:33:54
Speaker
They do. I love that somebody is there. One of the parents is like, I guess we should call the cops. And the kids are like, shit, we got to go. And it's worth mentioning. that hair It is worth mentioning. The parents immediately have an affection for the kids and immediately are so super sad that they never had kids of their own.
01:34:17
Speaker
Like they always wanted kids and never could have them. And I think. That's important for an argument that one of the kids makes later. Okay. Yeah, yeah. This was also, dude, my biggest fear as a kid is my parents would forget me.
01:34:29
Speaker
Oh. Or they would just disappear. Like, i when I would think about, I never liked the idea of heaven for a million reasons, but ah when I would think about, like, the idea of, like, what if you ah had multiple lives? Like, what if you came back?
01:34:43
Speaker
What if you reincarnated? i was always right the thing as a little kid, but, like, like pre- pre-six, pre-seven, like very little kid, was like, but my parents won't know who I am. I won't know my parents and my parents won't know me.
01:34:59
Speaker
Because if I don't remember my previous life now, I won't remember this life next time and then I won't know who my parents are. I won't know these two people. They'll be strangers.
01:35:11
Speaker
I won't even remember them. this Yeah, that's terrifying. Yeah, it was so scary for me as a kid. Did you never... yeah I was always worried. No, mine mine was, you know in the movie Hook, when Captain Hook tells Peter Pan's kid, like, hey, your parents don't actually love you. you are just pretending to.
01:35:28
Speaker
ah i remember being terrified of that. Which probably explains a lot about me as an adult. I was also terrified that, like, robots or aliens or something had replaced my parents and were just pretending to be my parents. Yes. I wasn't scared of that. I was always a little suspicious. I was just looking out for it.
01:35:47
Speaker
So the kids immediately run to the super's unit. Mr. Ortiz. Remember, they stole his fire up yes extinguishers. love that the super is a regular character. yeah But he doesn't recognize them either.
01:36:02
Speaker
They take to the streets hiding behind. Yeah. So he knocks on there they knock on his door and he's like, it's 3 a.m. Who are you strange children knocking on my door? And they try to explain the situation. And he's like...
01:36:18
Speaker
Okay, you're clearly not okay. Why don't you come in? I'll try to take care of you, help you get this sorted out. He's being very nice. And the kids go, run for it! They book it down the hallway.
01:36:34
Speaker
ah They take to the streets hiding behind a dumpster as the rain pours down on them. How could this be happening? alex remembers something didn't the morlocks they just met have beautiful dreamer who could change people's memories assuming they're up to their old tricks the kids take to the sewers to find the morlocks you can't keep these kids out of the sewers they love it down there they can't get out of all the lessons you've learned they just keep going down there get out of there kids and
01:37:05
Speaker
Where are the power? Oh, where? Power pack didn't show up to school today. Check the sewers. Makes my thought about what Alex smells like so much worse. too You mean Jack. Jack is the word. jack jackass You can. You think every piece damn kids straight. I think every one of them is named Alex. yeah
01:37:26
Speaker
so So how would beautiful dreamer do this? Like, okay. Did she also get their teachers and their grandparents and their aunts and uncles? Like how far does this go?
01:37:38
Speaker
i' Yeah, why go for the super specifically? Yeah, it seems like a strange, unless you're going pretty far down the the chain of command there. Right.
01:37:49
Speaker
It's a trap they realize when they're immediately ambushed by Mask, Erg, Tar Baby, and Ape. Only Katie manages to escape, evading Mask's masks grasp.
01:38:01
Speaker
Say that. Masks grasp. mask Masks grasp. Squirrel girls masks grasp. ah When he tries to grab her, he only brushed her face.
01:38:15
Speaker
she runs She runs through the dark subway tunnels until she's found by the police and taken to the hospital. Since she's zapped one of the police in the process, this all makes the local news.
01:38:27
Speaker
Grabbing. Yeah. Once again, Julie is like, or yeah is it Julie? No, it's Katie. Katie. Katie is trapped in the subway tunnel. A police officer finds her and is like, hey, I'm here to help. i you're You're in a subway tunnel. I want to get you out of here.
01:38:47
Speaker
And she turns around and is like, zap, no get away from me. And like stuns him. The power pack are explicitly anti-cop. Yeah, they they hate him. she And then I guess she it's like enough to make it on the news. Okay, they do arrest her. They arrest the little girl. and they yeah Yeah, she doesn't escape the police's grasp. There's a couple others further back that grab her. I guess so.
01:39:13
Speaker
So it makes the local news grabbing Kitty's attention who recognizes the unidentifiable girl's costume. The face bait may be hideous. Hideous. But this is definitely Katie Power. This must be the work of Mask.
01:39:29
Speaker
So also, i guess Kitty is in college because she talks about having Dr. Powers, their dad, um...
01:39:40
Speaker
who was a college professor. Yeah. Like he's my trade. She's got to write a research paper for his physics seminar. So I imagine, cause she does, she does reaffirm for us that she's 16. She's not college age.
01:39:57
Speaker
Like I thought maybe we were taking ah a time jump or an age jump for her just to make her an adult. and Right. Cause that's gotta to happen sometime. But That's not what's happening here. She's still 16. She is taking, I guess, college level courses. Yeah. Maybe whatever Max Power teaches. I call it Max Power. I don't know if that's there. It's not. i Professor X, I guess, can't offer it.
01:40:26
Speaker
I guess. one of his blind spots. There's yeah, there's only so much. His name is Jim, but there's only so much that Charles x Xavier can teach. But the other neat thing here is Katie gets away and she's like, oh, he missed me. But you can kind of see mask like his hand just brushing against her face. And then we follow her for the next two pages and we don't see her face. And...
01:40:55
Speaker
I knew, i imagine Matt, you knew what was going to happen here. Yeah. But it's still uncertain until you turn the page a couple of times and you actually see her face on the news. And she looks like ah and she looks like a who from Whoville.
01:41:09
Speaker
Yes. Yes, she definitely does. Kind of like a Dr. Seuss ass face. Yes. Essentially, they move her mouth all the way down to her chin, but they leave her nose where it is. So she's they've she's got a giant upper lip. And they give her a bunch of wrinkles and they like turn her nose upwards. Yeah, yeah. And like a really strong, what do they call this thing? Frenulum?
01:41:32
Speaker
Frenulum? That's what I meant by upper lip. So Kitty immediately rallies rogue Rachel and Logan to join her and phases Kitty out of the hospital bed where she's been restrained. There's a doctor outside that's like, just calling this little girl ugly.
01:41:46
Speaker
Yeah, what the fuck? It's like, this is like, we're a hideous girl. She's like, she He even says, and one of the doctors says, I've never seen anyone so miserable. And the other doctor says, or so ugly.
01:41:59
Speaker
Fuck off, dude. What are you doing? You're a doctor and she's a little girl. And she's right there. Yeah. whaty Okay. I want to mention this really quick.
01:42:10
Speaker
This is a crossover between Power Pack and Uncanny X-Men. But it's also like... But Louise Simonson and Chris Claremont having a conversation and she's like, all right, I got an idea for a story. I'm going to do it.
01:42:23
Speaker
And then you do it. Okay. Right. We're just going through the scene. I'll do the story. Then you do the story. And ah you like, how let's see how you would tell it. And I tell it how I would tell it. My story. They all get curious. They chase a cat into the sewers in your story. A little girl gets disfigured.
01:42:44
Speaker
right. They phase Katie out of her hospital bed, and then she lets Rachel read her mind and share her memories with the team, confirming that the Morlocks are at it again.
X-Men Leadership and Morlock Confrontation
01:42:55
Speaker
Everyone looks to Kitty for the next move.
01:42:57
Speaker
Despite her hesitation, they tell her she's leading the mission. This is so cool. This is like a earlier. Wolverine is already looking at Kitty being like...
01:43:09
Speaker
damn she's rallied us all together she knows what she's doing also reflecting on kurt being the leader and being like i would never want to be leader kurt thinks he's not doing a good job but none of us would be doing half the job he is so right it's already established wolverine doesn't want to lead kitty is becoming more mature in her role on the x-men and then here is where wolverine is like What's the next move, kid?
01:43:38
Speaker
Like, oh, it's Kitty. Yeah, Kitty's the leader. yeah um yeah And Kitty does a good job here. Like, she gets she she has, like, this, like, jacket in her bag that she gives Katie, and she's like, this makes you an honorary X-Man. Nobody's got a jacket like this. Yeah. It's really sweet.
01:43:55
Speaker
but So, yeah do you know do you notice in this one panel there's just a swirl? Yes. Yeah, it looks like somebody tried to draw the sun inside of this hospital room.
01:44:06
Speaker
And then gave up. It's just a swirl. It's just a swirl. It seems to have no bearing on anything else. It doesn't make any sense. It's just a swirl there. It doesn't look super out of place.
01:44:17
Speaker
But if you notice it, it doesn't make any sense. Your eyes could glaze over it. But the inker decided to ink that. Yeah. I can't imagine that's a that's penciled in.
01:44:28
Speaker
Even if it is like, why would the anchor be like, got to go over this one? Kitty must be going crazy here, right? At this moment, she's like, fuck, just yesterday they did this. Yeah, didn't I just pull you out of the Morlock tunnels? Why did you go back? I just, the Morlocks just did this literally yesterday. yeah And she's probably also being like, God damn, we've let them go. we were, they they told us they learned their lesson. We have to stop doing this. And earlier and earlier to that day, she was like, man, I am so busy. i've got I've got a paper to write. I've got a danger room session. I've got all like i've got all this stuff to do. and she has to just go do the same thing she did yesterday with the Morlocks. Yeah, yeah.
01:45:16
Speaker
Thank God all that power pack stuff is behind me. Yeah. A short time later, they're a mile underground. Kitty phasing the team plus Katie right back to Annalise Chambers.
01:45:29
Speaker
They discover her room now decorated with all of the powers, kids, furniture and toys. OK, so this was the piece I couldn't I couldn't connect in my mind. It's like, how did they how did they get all the kids furniture and toys out of there? Oh, they just brought other Morlocks along to move it out. Yeah, there must have been like a teleporting Morlock or a Morlock that eats furniture, has a void in their stomach and then goes back and spits it all out.
01:46:01
Speaker
Like, who knows? A Morlock who's a moving van. and That's what they call, that's his name, moving van. Moving van. Annalie storms in just then, accompanied by three unfamiliar children.
01:46:15
Speaker
Or are they? Wolverine recognizes the power sent, despite all of their faces having been messed up by mask. This makes Katie so mad that she accidentally fires off a power ball. She's five!
01:46:31
Speaker
pro ah Prompting the other power children to attack in defense of their, quote, mother, backed up by a horde of Morlocks. Yeah, so the other children have all been brainwashed by now. They are fighting Katie and the X-Men.
01:46:46
Speaker
A fight breaks loose. Wolverine is temporarily subdued when he decides not to kill a child, and Rogue runs into Leech with unexpected results. When he touches her, he goes unconscious, but she doesn't absorb any of him.
01:47:01
Speaker
She just loses all of her powers, right in time for a bunch of bulky Morlocks to show up. All the big ones. She whips absolute ass anyway. Yes, she does.
01:47:14
Speaker
In another chamber, Kitty and Logan are punching the hell out of a lot of Morlocks. Logan defers to her command not to use his claws until, of course, they're severely outnumbered. And he tells her he's just going to do it.
01:47:28
Speaker
She's like, he's like, hey, man, yeah i there i I don't know what else to do. I got to start shredding people. And she's like, there's nothing. I i understand, man. it's like there's you I can't stop you. There's nothing I can do about this. I'm not going to look, though. Bye. Good luck.
01:47:45
Speaker
Which is, I mean... This may look like Wolverine defying the orders of the person he just said was in charge. But this is how Wolverine treats every leader.
01:47:56
Speaker
Yeah. you will listen to them until he's like, I'm sorry, I got to start killing. Right. Right. And but with Kitty, he's like, hey, I hope you understand. There's no other way.
01:48:09
Speaker
So Kitty runs off to find Annalie and save the kids, finding them just as Katie is begging Annalie to let her and her siblings go. Kitty taunts and shames Annalie. What's the matter? You lost your kids. Oh, little dead kids. Stupid lady with her dead little kids.
01:48:28
Speaker
um Until Callisto storms in demanding an explanation. wow You're fucked now. i We should say Kitty's doing that on purpose to trigger... Yes. Annalise's power. Trying to make Annalise more is so upset that the wave of emotion, the psychic wave of emotion reaches Callisto far across the tunnel. Yes. Yes. It's not just to be a dick, but she says pretty harsh things about Annalise's kids.
01:48:56
Speaker
I bet your kids are dumb anyway. i don't A short time later, Callisto is commanding her people to restore the children's lives back to normal and chiding Mask and Annalise.
01:49:10
Speaker
Annalie asks Callisto to just kill her. But Katie takes pity and offers Annalie to be sort of an honorary grandmother. Invites her to Thanksgiving.
01:49:21
Speaker
Which Katie does. You don't know this, but Katie does several times in Power Pack. Invites people to Thanksgiving. And then there is an issue ah where it's like, it is Thanksgiving.
01:49:35
Speaker
And it's like Wolverine and Kitty, Pride and Cloak and Dagger and Anna Lee and i maybe the Punisher show up. And they've got to like hide it from their parents. It might be an annual or something. It's so good. that's nice That's awesome.
01:49:54
Speaker
This is the thing. Katie keeps meeting these superheroes she's just a little girl. So she does stuff like she asks the Punisher to tell her a secret. Like she she asks Wolverine to tell her. She keeps asking people to tell her secrets and inviting them to Thanksgiving. It's so funny.
01:50:10
Speaker
Well, I mean, that is the ultimate, like... child power fantasy right you are such good friends with a superhero that they are telling you secrets yeah yeah what secret do you think the punisher told katie when a person dies they shit themselves
01:50:36
Speaker
we'll see you thanksgiving
01:50:39
Speaker
so Everyone's happy. No one is punished. And then suddenly Rachel gets a mental call from Magneto for telling rewards to the end. the It sucks.
01:50:52
Speaker
Fuck Secret Wars. Yeah, the they ruin it, but it's all it's restricted to last panel here. It's just the issue ends, and then there's one more panel where Rachel is like, ah, Secret Wars 2!
01:51:06
Speaker
There's a point here where Katie's like, I just wanted to be an adventurer like Luke Skywalker, and Wolverine's like, and she's like, and then it all went wrong, and he's like, it didn't go too well for Luke Skywalker either.
01:51:18
Speaker
Wolverine's a Star Wars nerd. He's absolutely right to be like, actually, while you may have enjoyed the films, Luke Skywalker actually had a very difficult experience. That Wolverine thinks about movies in that way. Like he watches blockbusters and he's like, man, that's man. That Elliot really went through a lot of trouble with E.T.
01:51:42
Speaker
I feel almost guilty watching this thing. i feel humers I feel bad that I'm enjoying it while Elliot is having such a rough time. What a burden for this boy to carry. break him.
01:51:59
Speaker
It might not happen now, but over time, this will break em
01:52:06
Speaker
him. Here's my problem with Mask's powers. Okay, let's hear it. He can adjust faces like they're putty, right? So.
01:52:17
Speaker
Except for his own. So imagine somebody hands you a a perfectly sculpted human face made of clay. Sure. And they're fuck this up. And you fuck it up.
01:52:28
Speaker
Yeah. And then they come back to you a little later and they're like i didn't want this fucked up. Can you put it back? Could you put it back the way it was? No. No, of course not. So even a master sculptor couldn't put it back exactly as it was.
01:52:48
Speaker
So it either implies that there is a natural shape to these people's faces and he is stretching it against that. And all he's doing is like releasing a catch. Sure.
01:53:00
Speaker
Like, oh, if I pull this string out, your face goes back to normal. But it's not a real string. It's like a Or he is the world's greatest sculptor with a photographic memory.
01:53:13
Speaker
That would be pretty cool. Got a lot of spare time on his hands. And I think the same thing about characters who can fuck with memories, like even Professor Xavier. How do you put somebody's mind back in the way you found it?
01:53:26
Speaker
yeah Yeah, it seems like that was a lot of ay bridges burned. which Which Beautiful Dreamer does. Is she reconstructing false memories that to the best of her memory are the hour of what happened?
01:53:41
Speaker
Right. Or is it just like there's actually a sort of ah veil over their memories that she just has to remove. Right. Or that Mask just has to undo. Exactly. Right. Like your face is still there. Or like maybe he can see your DNA and he knows. But then it's not just DNA though because your face is your DNA plus the things that you've done to your body.
01:54:14
Speaker
The way you've lived between yeah yeah birth and now. Yeah. Could he just like, could he remove my pockmark? Yeah. I mean, I he i imagine he he why he wouldn't. Why not? He wouldn't, but he could. He would just mess up my face. He would tell me he would, then he just mess up my face. I have a wrinkle between my two eyes that's like a bridge, and it like goes all the way across my nose. Yeah, yeah. Because of squinting when I was younger. um Yeah. Because I didn't want to get. I tell you all the time.
01:54:43
Speaker
Glasses of contact. But it just it's just like a line, and I think it looks like, it's like the stupidest little. I think it's great. It gives your face personality. But I want that. right I don't mind. i think it's cute. i don't I don't want just like a line. It's like when you draw glasses on a face as a kid. You just draw a line across the nose. Between the two eyes. Between the two eyes. And that is what my wrinkle does. And I hate it. a Mask could just reach in and just go like, just smudge it off.
01:55:15
Speaker
Right. He could probably make a shit ton of money doing that, too. Yeah. No matter what. is why like ah and Instead of becoming the world's most famous plastic surgeon, he just likes to sit in the sewers and be like, I'm ugly. So everyone else should be ugly. and And I'm impoverished. So everybody should be miserable like me. You don't have to be, man. No one would care that you're a mutant or that you're ugly if you could make everybody beautiful.
01:55:40
Speaker
If you were for you specifically mask, this is a choice. Yes. Yeah. Can he, can he fuck with, fuck, fuck with bodies too? I don't think so. No. Pretty sure it's just faces. Just faces. There is a good thing in this issue. Rachel.
01:55:56
Speaker
Is with interacting with Katie and we get a lot more personality out of her in these three panels than we have so far. So she's great with kids. Like she sits down, she knows exactly how to talk to her She gives her her jacket and like develops a rapport with her.
01:56:15
Speaker
And then. asks for permission to read her memories and is very clear in terms that a child can understand of like, here's what I'm going to do. Here's what it means. We will know all your secrets. So if there's anything you want to hide, like we promise we won't tell anybody, but you should be informed before I read your mind that this is what's going to happen. And it's like, oh, of course,
01:56:39
Speaker
You were a psychic raised by Xavier in your timeline that he hammered into you the ethics of being psychic, not ethics that he necessarily follows, but it's rules that he basically wrote.
01:56:55
Speaker
So this is who Charles Xavier should be. Interesting. Right. and' so I thought that was really neat to for her just to like to fully understand the ethics of the situation and and know how to make it comfortable for the other person.
01:57:14
Speaker
So we're finally getting some character development for Phoenix. And a name. She has a name. Yeah. And some character development. It would... Really suck if Secret Wars came along and ruined her and next issue was her last issue in the X-Men.
01:57:31
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Why would you even say that? though I don't know. It's a weird thing to say. Edit this part out because that is the most redundant, obvious thing you've said, I think, in the history of this podcast.
01:57:45
Speaker
Okay. Yeah, of course I don't want a character that I finally like to disappear next issue because of an editorial mandate. So, I'm just saying, it was just a thought I had. i i just had the thought and I felt like I had to share it with you.
01:58:02
Speaker
I'm sorry. Yeah. I hope I don't die tomorrow. God, what if I die tomorrow? Oh my God. this What would we do with that clip?
01:58:15
Speaker
Would I let you show? It would go viral for sure. probably start getting some listens on this damn podcast. Would I let anybody hear it or would I like hide it because it would be too upsetting for people?
01:58:26
Speaker
Are you kidding me You take the, you, okay. You would clip it, you cut it off exactly at the point where I say, Oh God, what if I died tomorrow? And that's where like the title card comes in. You tell people what episode it's from. and they'll tune it God.
01:58:45
Speaker
Be the funniest thing we ever did. Don't, don't die. mark I'm not going to. I'm well not. What if I do? So, uh, yeah. How do, how do you feel about this?
01:58:59
Speaker
Honestly, i thought this was fine Power Pack is for children. Again, it's like not not in like a Toy Story sort of winking at the adults reading it way More in like a, i don't know, Barney or Paw Patrol sort of like.
01:59:19
Speaker
This is not, you are not going to enjoy this. But. The concepts are interesting. Again, I love the i love the interplay between Louise Simonson and Chris Claremont because we know that they're friends, that they work very closely together. ah They kind of just told the same story twice, but the way that they make it work, the way that like in Power Pack,
01:59:41
Speaker
Kitty and Kurt are there because they're walking through Morlock tunnels from the X-Men 194 in Power Pack 12. The kids are talking to their parents in the middle of the night because of the storm that was introduced in X-Men.
01:59:57
Speaker
Wait, I have my numbers anyway. In Power Pack 12. They weave them together creatively, even though the continuity doesn't quite work. I think that...
02:00:08
Speaker
i think Powerpack and X-Men make a good combo. I think like the way that they interact with each other is very sweet. And I think there's they they probably have a they have a lot in common. Right. um Powerpack are hiding their identities from everybody. Yeah. And they they you know, they are still trying to learn their powers. Yeah.
02:00:32
Speaker
And they're all young. And so so were the New Mutants. So were some of the X-Men, right? Yeah. i'm sure the X-Men as characters see a lot of the power pack or see a lot of themselves in the power pack. Yes. Because they remember being kids scared of their own powers and trying to figure it all out.
02:00:49
Speaker
The Power Pack art don't feel to me like four little Spider-Mans, four little Peter Parkers. They feel to me like four little X-Men characters. Yeah. It is just, so I just think it is such a funny idea that Louise Simonson and Chris Claremont were talking about how how are we going to collaborate on a story together? And they're like, what if we just tell it twice? Yeah. Yeah. What if we just get our two different takes on it and see what happens? I love one of the major differences is both end with one of the children giving a speech to somebody. Like they resolve it through talking to the bad guy and kind of de-escalating.
02:01:31
Speaker
In Louise Simonson's version, they talk like children. They're just like, You know, what my parents would be upset too.
02:01:42
Speaker
But in the Claremont version, they are giving wise sage-like advice. Yeah. It's very long-winded. Like, well you know, yeah when I was younger, there was a time when I felt like they just go on this long Shakespearean rant about about love and ah what a familial relationship should be. You know...
02:02:05
Speaker
There was one other thing that I there's a we have a dangling concept here that I forgot to follow up on, which is Katie or Julie in the first in the Power Pack 12 told Anna Lee like you're my art.
02:02:18
Speaker
Our parents will be sad. Yeah, yeah. We'll miss our parents and our parents will miss us. So Annalie was like, oh, I can solve that. And that's why she did what she did in X-Men 195. She was like, they won't be sad now.
02:02:32
Speaker
Now no one will be sad. And you guys won't remember them and they won't remember you. And so no one's sad. So I actually fixed it. Yeah, problem solved. This is why you don't try to...
02:02:44
Speaker
you don't try A mentally unstable person, you don't try to argue against them logically. Try to logic them out of it Because they... It's also... Yeah.
02:02:54
Speaker
It's also why you should just express your own feelings instead of putting them onto someone else. In a in a real sincere discussion. Good point. Don't say... yeah Well, don't do this because, you know, my friend wouldn't like it. If you're the one that wouldn't like it. oh i I love it when you bring your acoustic guitar to my parties. But my friend has this thing where they they really, it's the sound of guitars. that It's the way that strings reverberate. It reverberated or hurts their ah ah wisdom teeth.
02:03:29
Speaker
Oh, you know what? You remember that thing you said about your friend and acoustic guitars? Fully understood. I made him completely deaf. Ooh, wee bat.
02:03:55
Speaker
Did you hear that? thumb It's time for Pat's deals. Yes. Yeah. It's the same one we've done for 64 episodes. this is my This is my thing. this way is like I'm playing the role of bad podcaster this episode, where every time we come back from a theme, i'm like, what was it? I'm just pretending like I don't know what the themes are or that they came to. they came really yeah like Are you sure it's time for that?
02:04:22
Speaker
Just like, gotta to say something now. Gotta say something clever. Don't have anything. I'm just gonna pretend like I don't know what the fuck it is. This is why I start all my segments with, whoop.
02:04:36
Speaker
Because I'm figuring out what I'm supposed to say. As long as you need to. ah joke think a jokeu o think of a Joke. Think of joke. Think of a joke. Think of a joke.
02:04:47
Speaker
Right. His name is Matt. Matt. Today, you have a pretty intriguing ad, Matt. How would you like to, here's the headline, start your own ripoffs, gang.
02:05:00
Speaker
ah Okay, I'll read you the copy. Ripoffs. Ripoffs. They're sporty athletic shoes in a variety of styles and awesome colors. Each pair comes with four different Velcro-backed colorful stickers that you can put on and rip off special spots on each shoe. You have a sneaker. These are Velcro stickers.
02:05:23
Speaker
There's sneakers. You get the sneakers. You you you buy the sneakers. So, ripoffs are the sneaker. What? okay And on this sneaker that they sell, they have a bunch of little spots with Velcro.
02:05:37
Speaker
And then they also sell, they call them stickers, but they're just like Velcro patches. So you can stick them on the shoe and trade them out each day.
02:05:48
Speaker
Patrick. Yes. These are Crocs. Essentially. Yeah. This is like, this is like the little pegs you can plug into your Crocs, but on a sneaker, as through a shoe that you can actually wear out in public and not be ashamed.
02:06:04
Speaker
Um, The only one they show here is a sticker that says a book a quote unquote sticker that says $2. Yes. Yeah. That is the one display. because That's the one thing you don't want people to know about. Well, I don't think that's a real sticker, Matt.
02:06:23
Speaker
I'm pretty sure that's to let us know you can get $2 off using this ad Rip off sneakers stickers. Let's look these up. Let's look at it. Let's see what kind of ones. Allegedly over 500. Okay.
02:06:37
Speaker
Yeah. yeah This is impossible to fucking Google. Let's see who gets it. Okay. Rip offs sneakers. What the fuck? Yeah, folks, we are stumped on this one.
02:06:51
Speaker
Nothing is coming up. We just we paused for like an hour. Matt went to the library and Uh, I, you can still call the librarian and ask them to look stuff up for you. But she told me to, she told me to shut up. Like, Hey, you sound cute. Why don't you come on down?
02:07:09
Speaker
ah yeah she Yeah, she did. She had me come on down. Um, so I kissed the librarian for about 30 minutes. Then I spent a little more time looking and, uh, nothing. So if you know anything about these folks, uh,
02:07:23
Speaker
Rip offs sneakers. If you started a rip off scang like they suggest here. I actually can't even find the fucking sneakers anywhere. I know. All we can find is the ads for this.
02:07:35
Speaker
What if you go to eBay? Did these exist? but Yeah, right. That's what I'm wondering.
02:07:41
Speaker
A couple more things while you're looking this up. Number one, their tagline is the only crime is not having them. because they're called ripoffs. So they have to they have to address the criminal element to the name. And then the other, I think this is very nice. they So they give you $2 off coupon here, but in fine print, they say, if you don't want to cut the coupon out, it's okay to just write the words Marvel Comics offer on your ripoffs, mail, or order form.
02:08:13
Speaker
So you don't have to cut up your comic to use this one to get this $2 discount. This is unbelievable. even in Even on eBay,
02:08:27
Speaker
it's the only thing you can find is the ad. They do list a hotline here on the ad. Ripoff special hotline. You want to try calling it? Yeah. They're only open Monday through Friday.
02:08:41
Speaker
How would we know? How could we... I'm losing it, man. Yeah, I know. this is this This is hard for you to process that you can't find more information on this. You going be okay? cause No. Because I want to see what all the stickers are.
02:08:58
Speaker
This is driving me nuts. All right. Well, ah yeah, Pat. Folks. All right. All right. Pat, deal. Assuming they ever actually existed. Deal. I will buy. ah Yeah, I will buy these from you.
02:09:11
Speaker
Now you have to produce. All right. Success. Another successful Pat's deals and steals. That means you have to fucking produce them. Not in the rules. He's got an eye out. Stuff that you could buy out.
02:09:22
Speaker
If you had a time machine that you would like to try out. Deals and steals. Well. That's the show, folks. That is Mutant Menace. Mutant Menace. Episode 65. Can you believe that, Matt? 65? 65 episodes. That's more than 52. The X-Men only made it to 68 before getting canceled. We are dangerously close to that.
02:09:50
Speaker
To get it canceled. Don't cancel it. We did talk about a racist folktale in this one. Well, guys, thank you so much for listening. Why don't you go into our show notes?
02:10:02
Speaker
Yeah. And you can go you too you you you can get a ah link to patreon.com slash mutant menace. You can also get a link to our Instagram page, which is Mutant Menace Pod, or our email if you want to be on Pat's email corner, MutantMenacePod at gmail.com.
02:10:24
Speaker
You can check us out on YouTube, Mutant Menace Podcast. Discord should also be in the show notes. Just go ahead and discord and click there. Join us and talk about some dumb stuff.
02:10:35
Speaker
I can't tell you the address for a Discord. It's too complex for Matt's little brain. So like, share, subscribe, all that stuff. It's it really is important. We cannot stress that enough. And if you want to join the Patreon, we have some cool stuff over there. Thank you as always to Krils Wilson for the music and to Julia Selle for the voice of Trish Tilby. I just saw Julia last night.
02:10:58
Speaker
Me too. I saw you last night. Me too. How about it? and And I saw you and your wife. Don't talk about now that. Now that the internet knows you knows that your wife was at a party.
02:11:10
Speaker
And I guess. You must be so embarrassed. Cut that out.
02:11:15
Speaker
And I guess that leaves us just with one last thing to do here. Right, Matt? The catchphrase that we say at the end of every episode of this podcast. That's right. As always, folks, you're not my mama.
02:11:28
Speaker
And remember, yeah, which knows. So shut up.