Transcript
Speaker: Welcome to Bi Men Unfiltered, a podcast for today's curious and bisexual man hosted by older, wiser bisexual men who were also once curious. From identity and relationships to dating, sex, community, and everything in between, nothing's off the table. Honest, authentic, and we're not afraid to get a little and NSFW or more than a little. No shame, no stereotypes, just real conversations. On today's episode, we're going to stuff some toys up our butts. What? We're going to talk about exploring with toys.
Speaker: that's what Well, see, I missed the memo because I'm i'm ahead of you. ha! No, i'mdding I'm kidding. Yes, we're going to be talking about ah toys but of the butt variety, of the penis variety, of all sorts of varieties, of the prostate variety, all kinds of things.
Speaker: So we'll be talking more about that. And Transformers. Yeah. G.I. Joe's? And He-Man Masters of the Universe toys. Yes, absolutely. And while you don't want watch Moss Man, you don't want any moss growing on your toys either. No, no and and i and I don't want Jared Leto near them either.
Speaker: Or that. But first, I think we should talk about what we've been up to. What do you think about that? ah Sure. You have a better story, so I'll go first to leave the better story for last.
Speaker: Because mine is just that I was supposed to have a second meet here recently with a potential friend with benefits who in in town for for work that had to cancel last minute because of work stuff.
Speaker: Mm-hmm. And so je nothing. Yeah. But important to remember that these kinds of things happen, like scheduling. It doesn't even matter if you're in town for work. You could be in the same town all the time and still have these kinds of scheduling stuff.
Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. Still have scheduling stuff come up. You know, it it happens. It's you know one of those things that it's bummer, but it happens. Yeah.
Speaker: Just kind of have to move on from it. Yep. Move on from it. And then, you I hope you're able to meet up with the, with him soon again. Hopefully so friends with benefits, having a regular friend with benefits is, is a good time. It's very good. Yes. I'm a fan. And then in the meantime, we have again, single straight men who don't read hitting us up on the lifestyle site.
Speaker: Of course. Yeah, of course. he You know, like 28 year old, no picture on the profile, very sparse profile, sends a message.
Speaker: You two need a mail? No.
Speaker: I'm sure that's just a copy paste to every couple's profile. Right. I mean, you know, I'm sure there's no, no thought in that. They, they, they shoot their shot because they're a dime a dozen. And yeah, yeah especially with no picture. That's that's there's some balls on that one.
Speaker: Yeah. It's like, no, we, we, we, we don't need you. We, we do not desire you. Neither one of us. Bye. Bye. You don't even get our full boiler plate. That's the single male stigma.
Speaker: Ah, I mean, I understand it. I mean, yeah, I understand why it's because of people like that guy. Yeah. Yes.
Speaker: Well, you, you, you have the fun story. I've got a little bit of a story because the spanking party happened. The event occurred. ah Yeah. So I went with a, with a good friend who had been before and yeah, we went to this sort of, uh,
Speaker: it's kind of like a yoga studio space sort of thing, but with ah a lot of places where you can tell they've got Shibari stuff happening or there's like ah the harnesses for crazier things. And the, what was the cross that, that to there's some, it's like the St. Andrew's cross. Is that what it is? that's Something like that sounds right. it's like an act It was,
Speaker: Yeah, as soon as you said it, the word escaped my mind. Yeah, yeah. They had one of those there, complete with ah with Fort Trough branding on it. My friend was like... what He was like, is that the Decepticon logo? The Fort Trough logo looks deceptively like the Decepticon logo. And see, we're we're already bringing it around to the Transformers. Already bringing in Transformers. Yeah, I was like, no, I think that's the Fort Trough logo. And later on, I was i did a search and I was like, yep, that's the Fort Trough logo. logo Fortroth of course does a lot of toys and a lot of paraphernalia uh for gay men and uh they do a lot of bondage stuff as well so yeah I've ordered some things from Fortroth which we'll talk about a little bit uh later and I just looked it up and we were correct it is a St. Andrew's cross
Speaker: Okay. Excellent. Otherwise that that would have been driving me nuts the whole. Yes. Yes. So yeah, I went to the spanking event. ah Yeah. And there were probably about 20 people there, um all ages. And there were also some trans ah female to male participants as well.
Speaker: And they had a raffle at the door. which was interesting and unexpected. And I won a little like, they were raffling off like different implements that you could use to spank others, which I thought was really kind of a fun, a fun thing for a spanking an impact play party to, to do that. So like little paddles, almost like ping pong paddle size,
Speaker: things and like spatulas almost. And then I got this Rattan carpet beater. That's a very interesting, would be a very interesting implement with which to spank.
Speaker: But I was mostly there on kind of a fact finding mission because as I have said in prior episodes, I am absolutely not experienced in BDSM or impact play or anything of the sort. Um,
Speaker: I'm completely new to that. But it is one of those topics that I'm kind of curious about it that I've always been curious about. And some partners have been like, I'm into spanking and I'm like, well, I don't even know how to how to do it. Like, what's the right way to go about it? I haven't.
Speaker: watched any videos or how to's or anything like that. So ah when my friend had mentioned that he'd gone to this party, I was like, Oh, I'd love to go to another event. Like if, if you hear of another event, like please let me know. So we went to this one. Yeah. 20 people. i mostly watched, although you put on at this one, there were two different wristbands. One for, if you want to be spanked and one, if you want to do the spanking,
Speaker: So I put on the um I'd like to be spanked ah wristband, even though it was like if somebody came up to me, I was like, wow, I'm only on a fact-finding mission. like i i don't really i'll I'll watch, but I don't really want to participate.
Speaker: So I mostly watched, but it was very interesting, very different than I expected, I guess, because there was spanking, but there was also like a lot of after care. And it was also like after a few hits, there would be like a sort of massaging the area that had been hit. And so it wasn't like just constant spanking or anything like that. It was very different than my perception was going into it.
Speaker: And there were people there who wanted to be the spanker that had just like duffel bags of equipment and some crazy things. Like one guy had like a cricket bat and then like one of those little like Nerf bats that is a little bit soft, but has like a certain, yeah i don't know, a hit to it and like a plastic, uh,
Speaker: thing with almost like a mace, I guess, like a bat with ah with pointed edges coming out, but plastic and kind of soft. And then ah a ruler, like a school ruler. I saw...
Speaker: i saw Another guy using a scrub brush, like a bathroom scrub brush, like you would scrub a toilet with using that. Very interesting. Like a lot a wide range of implements. And then also one of the more experienced guys had like a big like...
Speaker: I don't know what it was, like a vinyl strap that was almost like a whip, seemingly. when that hit somebody, i I could feel it. And I was only watching like because it really made a loud noise and it sounded like it hurt. what Was it like the stereotypical movie whip crack?
Speaker: Not quite that, no. No, nothing was the stereotypical whip crack sound, but very close to that. Maybe deeper and more guttural a sound than that.
Speaker: And I watched somebody use like two cat-o'-nine-tails on somebody on the St. Andrew's Cross. Yeah. But also there were people just, you know, putting guys over their lap and giving them a good spanking.
Speaker: And yeah it was very, very odd. and To just like be in this space and hear multiple people being spanked.
Speaker: It was very very strange, very interesting. Interesting. And fact-finding tour, so you're you're there wearing just a trench coat with like a little notepad. Oh, the notepad, yeah, exactly. Yeah. And like a Clark Kent fedora.
Speaker: Exactly. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Just wanted to make sure that i had the right mental picture there. I went in my tighty-whities with ah some athletic socks, like pulled up, white athletic socks pulled up, ah kind of rocking that look.
Speaker: And yeah, one of the guys there is like um an us an influencer, i guess I should say, like a ah video ah star on one of the spanking websites.
Speaker: And he would go around, he was going around like asking people had they been spanked yet. And so... Eventually, he got to me and it was like, have you been spanked yet? I was like, ah no. And he was like, oh well, come on.
Speaker: I'm like, okay, but I'm a complete newbie. Like, start me on level zero. Like, be gentle. start and i Start the tutorial, not...
Speaker: Right. This is the tutorial. Like I had watched this guy, like take this really big vinyl thing and just smack the shit out of people's asses and they liked it.
Speaker: So, um, so yeah, I went over to, ah they had a couch there and I kind of, you know, went over the back of the couch, but out,
Speaker: And he pulled down my underwear and started spanking each cheek. And he's a pro. He was a pro. Like, started off very light pressure, but you could, I mean, it stung.
Speaker: And I should say, like, I'm not used to being spanked. Like, growing up, never spanked. everything like that. So this is a completely new experience for me, but also, yeah, just got both cheeks red and like that stinging feeling, but then also like would stop in between and sort of like rub his fingers around. And let me tell you, that felt really good as much as it hurt to be spanked. Like the feeling, the fingers on that skin was just very,
Speaker: Very pleasurable. Just very good. ah but it hurt. The spanking hurt. And he started like maybe putting up the pressure a little bit.
Speaker: And I was like, okay, i think i think I think I'm done here. And we finished up and ah he gave me a hug. he Like everybody got a hug at the end of it. So it's like, yes, there's this beating that happens, but also there's an aftercare that happens as well. There was a hug and it was very,
Speaker: tender not only my butt but just the tender feelings of getting a hug like right yeah it was uh it was good though yeah right on Trying new things. Trying new things.
Speaker: I don't know that this is going to become a regular thing for me, though. I think I have done the fact finding. think actually now I could administer spankings. I think that is going to be my speed now.
Speaker: So next time you will have the other wristband on. I will. Potentially. Potentially. Yeah.
Speaker: And there were people like, um I saw, I watched a couple of people give out the spankings and I was like, okay, this person seems like my speed because they're nice and light, you know, not, not too hard.
Speaker: But, but yeah, I don't, I, I think, I think maybe I'll be delivering the spankings instead. Right on. And there was one guy there that got very aroused.
Speaker: On the spankings. This was a guy who you was, you know, being spanked by the guy with the cricket bat and the like soft nerf bat. And he was very aroused.
Speaker: It was kind of crazy to see because it didn't, I didn't really get aroused from the actual act of spanking. Although the fingers on the, on the butt was definitely great.
Speaker: That was very pleasurable. Right. But yeah, it was interesting to see the dynamic there and just kind of see how everything played out. So successful fact-finding mission for sure.
Speaker: And maybe I'll be back in order to use that paddle I got and the carpet, the rattan carpet beater. Now I have this rattan carpet beater. Now you have a tool.
Speaker: Yeah, I have a tool. I think it would hurt though. Oh my gosh, it seems like it would really hurt. Yeah. It sounds like a much more interesting raffle than the ones at the burlesque shows that we go to ah to. That's usually stuff that they have vendors set up at the show.
Speaker: So each one of them contributes something to the raffle. And then there's also like a signed cast poster from all the performers. Okay. so So, you know, there, there's usually, the there's usually the same baked goods, uh,
Speaker: person there So there's you know some some goodies, you know brownies and and Rice Krispie treats, cookies. Sure, sure, sure. you Occasionally, we'll we'll win something small in the raffle, but you know not not nearly as interesting items in the raffle as in that raffle.
Speaker: You could spank someone with Rice Krispie treats. Come on. You could do that. I mean, you you could. It'd be very soft. Yeah. that Well, and that presumes that I'm going to let the Rice Krispie Treat last long enough to spank someone with it.
Speaker: That's also true. Because they're they're good. They're homemade. They're they're not, you know. Not the store-bought. But, yeah, let's see. yeah Next time we go, we might have to talk to the director and go, Hey, Cambria, have you thought about. ah ah Exactly. Exactly.
Speaker: So that was my experience at the spanking party. That sounds like quite the experience. It was. Yes. Yeah. Happy I went. Happy I went.
Speaker: All right. Let's move on to, we got some feedback. We've been getting some email from people and thank you very much. ah Folks who have reached out to podcast at by men on filter.com. We really have enjoyed hearing from you, hearing what you think of the show and what do you think of the topics that we're doing and hearing more about your experience. And we did get an email from a listener. They they did not want us to read their email on the air, but i I thought this topic was major enough that we should talk about it on the air.
Speaker: yeahp And we did we did get their blessing to discuss the general issue. The general issue, yeah. Yeah. So the gist of the story was that this is a man who has has realized his bi desires later in life and explored them via watching media on premium cable and such, and also then chatting on apps and had the unfortunate experience to run into a blackmailer.
Speaker: who who then threatened to send pictures and chats to his wife and family if he did not pay out a gift card ransom. And I wanted to mention this story just because this can happen to DL guys who later in life have discovered their body desires and are keeping it a secret from their partner. And then they are forced out of the closet.
Speaker: with it. oh And this guy, unfortunately, the blackmailer did send to that stuff to his family and his wife, and he had to come clean about it. And That brings up you know a whole host of issues.
Speaker: And being outed by a blackmailer is obviously not ideal. And it strains that trust that you have between you and your partner.
Speaker: And now he has to rebuild that trust. And this was with a spouse who then, upon hearing this information, thought that he was going to leave.
Speaker: And luckily that hasn't happened. Right. Luckily it sounds like they're getting help and therapy and that's great. But, uh, definitely wanted to mention it just because this is going to, this is an experience that I think a lot of married by men who are on the DL could potentially experience if they are chatting on sniffies, grinder, ah wherever, but, you know, trying to keep their identity hidden.
Speaker: Yep. And we've we've all seen or heard the stories of, might have even received some of those clearly bogus, hey, I hacked your account and I turned on your camera and I have video of everything that you're looking at online and what you're doing while you're doing it. And I'm going to send it to everybody unless you send me crypto.
Speaker: Right. I get at least one of those like every two months. Yeah. It's been a while since i've I've gotten one, which always makes me laugh because I'm like, really?
Speaker: You turned on my camera? That has a physical cover over it. ah Right, exactly. What good did that do you? but But no, that this one, though, was a legitimate, obviously, it it was a legitimate case of blackmail because it didn't fit that scripted pattern of the bogus ones. So it really can happen. Yeah, we we joke about the bogus ones.
Speaker: But it really can happen. So you it it is something to be aware of. Yeah, something to be aware of. But also, i think on this show anyway, we advocate trying to communicate to your partner and be as upfront as possible to try to, you know, lessen the chance that you can be taken advantage of like this.
Speaker: And yeah I'm just glad that this guy didn't pay the ransom yeah that ah was being demanded. And that also ah that he...
Speaker: was able to come clean to his wife, even though that's hard. Oh my God. Like I can't imagine, but it also sounds like it brought a lot of intrusive thoughts to the four for him about, uh, potentially ending his own life. And, um, I'm glad that he did not do that. And, know, anyone who's experiencing that will put some help links in the show notes for that. But, um,
Speaker: Yeah, I think part of it is that accountability and this guy took accountability for his actions, which is great. hu but I think part of it also is that shame of being bisexual and having that secret from your partner.
Speaker: And you shouldn't feel shame. This is not something that you can control. Like these are your desires. And right. You know, and unfortunately he was forced to confront all of that, but I don't think he should feel shame for his own desires.
Speaker: And, you know, bi men do feel isolated. The amount of community support for bi men is a lot lower than that of other members of the LGBT community. And i would just encourage men to try to find that community.
Speaker: Maybe it's on Reddit. The bisexual men subreddit is a good community. place for some of that community and there is a bisexual men discord as well that is an official discord for that subreddit that i think is a good place to get support and talk with other men who are ah in similar positions and that that discord is not a hookup discord that is a support discord and you very importantly, because yeah, bisexual men do not have as many outlets to to talk about these feelings.
Speaker: Yeah. And we full disclosure, we are members of that discord and we see it all the time. People coming in thinking it is a hookup place and no, no, right. We, that gets nipped in the bud right away. That's not what the server is about.
Speaker: It's about support and community. So it is a great place to, to find that kind of community. Yeah. I would also recommend therapy.
Speaker: I think therapy is a great thing if you find a bioaffirming therapist that you can talk about these things with. I think that ah is super, super helpful.
Speaker: And I hope any men out there dealing with any kind of similar thing, I hope that they're able to get past navigate and um be their true selves.
Speaker: Mm-hmm. Absolutely. Gosh, how do we get out of this bummer of a ah first little bit of the show? Well, that we we then dive into, I believe, the word of the week, which is gonna kind of combine with the topic that we're talking about.
Speaker: Combine like some kind of Constructicon? ah Yes. i Full disclosure for one of my vanilla podcasts.
Speaker: I have the transforming sound effect. In the soundboard? endure Yes, in our soundboard. I'll have to put that right here.
Speaker: hey Yes. Excellent. Yeah, we have a word of the week and it's kind of related to our main topic. So our word of the week is spot.
Speaker: Yeah. And that is not the little spot on the front of your underwear that inevitably gets there no matter how much you shake.
Speaker: Good clarification. yeah The letter P spot, not P-E-E spot. Right. Yes. So you've heard of the G spot for women, the Grafenberg spot.
Speaker: And, you know, men have something similar. It's ah the prostate. And guess what? It's an erogenous zone. So that little walnut. is it?
Speaker: Well, yeah. It's a walnut-sized gland. that produces part of the fluid in semen and is located just a few inches inside the rectum towards the front of the body. And it's reachable externally through the perineum, which is your taint.
Speaker: Yes. um it It is quite enjoyable. Now, it doesn't matter what your sexual orientation is, because stimulation of the prostate, which has a lot of nerve endings packed into it, can be very pleasurable just because it's stimulated. hugh Now, we are obviously a bi and gay friendly podcast, but...
Speaker: There are men out there who are very, very reluctant to explore prostate stimulation. Yeah, but I heard from a friend of a friend that if you put something there, then that automatically makes you gay.
Speaker: a good friend of of ours who is pan has told the story to to me once about how a guy she was dating totally freaked out when she, with his consent, stimulated it and he liked it.
Speaker: Ha ha. I mean, even rubbing the perineum is real nice, can be real nice. It is. i mean, there there are also some men who don't want to like wash their butts, and I don't understand that. It's like...
Speaker: You gotta wash all over. It's not going to like change your sexual preference to just like soap up. No, it will not. oh oh the ah all of All of the things, the increasing list of things that it's like, is this gay?
Speaker: just boggles my mind. Didn't somebody say drinking through a straw is gay? Yes. Wow. That's some homophobia. ah Drinking through a straw.
Speaker: um i for I wish I could remember what it was, but it basically comes. I want to say I've heard someone not being sarcastic say that performing oral on a woman is gay.
Speaker: Yeah, I think I've heard that too. it's like That's what you get in the manosphere, apparently. Like, what? okay I don't understand. don't understand I have one. I have one.
Speaker: The masturbation-focused Discord chat that I helped moderate. We once had someone request from us a straight porn channel.
Speaker: Okay. Okay. Now, we have a general porn channel. like well There is. yeah That's what that is right there. yeah know We have a focus channel for gay porn, and we have a focus channel for trans porn, and we have a focus channel for exhibitionist porn.
Speaker: your Your straight porn goes in that general porn channel. yeah This person responded by saying anything that even features a penis in it.
Speaker: is at least bye. yeah Even if it is a heterosexual couple performing heterosexual acts upon one another, it's at least bi because that involves him as a man looking at another man's genitals.
Speaker: Right. In a sexual context. So ridiculous. So ridiculous. So he he wanted a straight porn channel because he didn't want anything gay at which point I told him,
Speaker: you do understand that this channel would preclude the inclusion of lesbian porn because by definition, that is not straight.
Speaker: Right. At which point he rage quit the server. That's funny. Yeah. That is funny. i mean, that's so much like ah women who would say that because you like any kind of anal stimulation that makes you gay.
Speaker: But what if a woman is the one doing it to you? Right. or Or if you have like a lesbian scene where one lesbian has a strap on and is penetrating the other one, is that straight? Because now now it's a penis-shaped object. Like what?
Speaker: mean This guy made this request like five years ago, and I to obviously still tell the story to this day. It's so ridiculous. So ridiculous. i I kind of hope that he has somehow stumbled into this podcast and hears me telling this story and recognizes himself and yeah I don't know.
Speaker: He's realized that for the five years he's been biphobic. Yes. This was all internalized biphobia and yes he's realized now.
Speaker: Could be, could be. But, uh, you know, if you're just starting your bi journey, it, it is very likely that you've never actually explored your butt very much or your P spot very much.
Speaker: So a few things you may want to keep in mind here that, you know, not everyone enjoys prostate stimulation to the same degree.
Speaker: Uh, I, Probably in that boat, like I'm ah low on the low end of enjoying prostate stimulation. I like it, but it's not like a life-changing thing for me. And of course, we'll talk more about prostate toys a little bit later, which I have ah quite a few of.
Speaker: ah You'll want to use plenty of lubrication. Very important there, especially if you have never had anything up there. Very important. Yes. You'll want to go slow.
Speaker: Jumping back to use plenty of lube. Remember the old MTV slogan. Too much is never enough. ah Right. and Right. i I say that because it it is a humorous way to remember a true fact.
Speaker: This is true. This is true. And if you're exploring for the first time, you may want to do it in the shower so that you're already near a drain and yeah clean up anything that is around that area.
Speaker: Accidents can happen. Sure. Sure. so you're going to want to go slow. you're going to want to start with a finger or a small toy. I think a finger is a good place to start, but a small toy works as well. ah You are going to want to make sure that any toys that you use have a flared base or handle because things can disappear up there if you're not careful. The way that ah the rectum works, you don't want to like lose an object up there and then have an embarrassing trip to the emergency room.
Speaker: And I am quite honestly surprised that that has not been one of the minor storylines on the pit in two seasons yet. I know. They're going to get to it eventually. I mean, come on. That's like your season ender.
Speaker: Like, for the final season, we're finally going there. Yeah. Well, I mean, it it would have been perfect for season two. Would have been perfect for season two because that was 4th of July weekend and, you know somebody like, you sticks like a firecracker.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. ah That's what Roman candles are for. It's fall a approaching Thanksgiving in season three that's coming up.
Speaker: Oh, okay. Well, you know, stuff and turkeys, like maybe there'll be... Turkey baster. Yeah, turkey baster. I could see it. I could see it. And, of course, stop if you experience any pain. like Yes. Yeah, that's that's not good. And we'll we'll talk about this more when we're talking about exploring with toys in general. But you you do want to buy body-safe toys online.
Speaker: from a reputable companies don't just go on amazon or team who and order something that might not actually be safe to put inside your body or while it might save you a little bit of personal embarrassment please do not 3d print your own toys Oh my God, I never even thought about that. You think people might do that just because they're embarrassed to receive? Oh, I'm certain people do that because... no don't do that.
Speaker: that it ABS is not meant for inside your body. No. resant Liquid resin is not meant for inside your body.
Speaker: no. oh bad don't do that. Yeah, don't 3D print your own toys. Definitely not.
Speaker: ah All right, but now you know that you have a peace spot, men, and and you explore it. And knowing is half the battle. Knowing is half the battle, absolutely.
Speaker: It's there. it it can feel pretty pretty good depending on how sensitive you are down there, of course. Yep. Very much. Very much.
Speaker: Let's move into our main topic. And that is exploring with toys. Yes. So I don't know about you, Grayson, but ah for me, when I think of sex toys, I think of that as being, that's for women.
Speaker: And, you know, like, because what pops into your head? Dildos and... ah Vibrators, you know, a magic wand, toy, that kind of thing.
Speaker: You don't think about sex toys for men. What does that what does that mean? Well, and if you were to walk into an adult shop or look on an adult toy, sex toy website, the bulk of them are going to be designed for and marketed to women.
Speaker: Yeah. um And i I don't remember if I've mentioned this on air or not, but I've kind of been looking forward to this episode because my we've we've already established how amazing my wife is in yeah pretty much every episode, right?
Speaker: Yes. For several years, she sold for Pure Romance. Sex toy company. Yes. um At the time, they they definitely did, like we were just saying, they focused on women because they would they would do in-home parties.
Speaker: Kind of like Tupperware parties. Tupperware parties, but for sex toys. okay where yeah where where the sales rep comes in, you know a host has booked the sales rep and invited friends over for the party. The sales rep would come in and would have display versions of the toys, might have had stock to hand over for immediate purchase right then or might have had to order.
Speaker: um You could not test drive, of course. Right, yeah. um And But that was to, I guess the best word is destigmatize the process so that, so here's kind of the the contradictory element of the entire sex toy business. And we'll get back to looking at them for men because pure romance did carry men's toys too, but men were not allowed at the parties.
Speaker: and they Not shocking, but yeah. Well, the reason being is despite the fact that the bulk of sex toys are designed and marketed to women, especially at the time, you know internet shopping is in its infancy.
Speaker: The places to get them are these seedy adult bookstores. Right. To walk in and buy. so There were a couple of companies, Pure Romance was the biggest one, that they would bring the shopping to them in the friendly party environment.
Speaker: ah The ordering was done in a different room than it was just the sales consultant and the person placing the order right then. So there's still some, you know privacy and discretion, you know, so that, you know Mildred doesn't know that, you mod is, you know, buying the thrust master 6,000, you know, right but, you know, they, they brought that in and online shopping and COVID killed it.
Speaker: Hmm. Coming out of COVID, they, and let's be real, they were an MLM. bra Right, right, right.
Speaker: And COVID killed the in-home sales MLM model of the business. Right. So they have all they've gone just direct online sales now.
Speaker: Makes sense. But they they did carry men's toys. ah This is how the vast majority of my stock of toys, while she was still selling, came into my possession.
Speaker: Nice. it It was a case of, oh, I think I thought you would like this, so I ordered it. Or, hey, look at this. Do you want this?
Speaker: We get a discount, so perfect. Yeah, they the bulk of them are... designed and marketed to women and where we're kind of going with this is there's a little bit of a taboo and stigma for men buying toys because most of most of the toys for men you know i women make no bones of the fact that i am buying a vibrator because it is more reliable than any man that i know yeah
Speaker: yeah or it Or it is an enhancement with... But for men, it's either the bulk of toys are anal toys, which we were just kind of talking about the whole ah no homo aspect. Yeah, the stigma of putting anything up your butt.
Speaker: Yeah, or... Or they are masturbation aids, which, no, i I get laid. I don't need to jerk off. Right. Exactly. so It's not manly.
Speaker: That's where I think a lot of that comes from. Yeah. But I don't know. What about you? where What do you think on all of that? I, yeah, originally wasn't really into toys. Like, I didn't even really think about them.
Speaker: initially, ah we can talk about the first sex toys that we bought. Mine was fleshlight, just the classic fleshlight with a e non-textured sleeve or anything like that. i So in my work, I would occasionally go to the Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas.
Speaker: In January. And there just so happened to be an adult ah video um conference or show happening at the exact same time. And when you had a badge to go into the Consumer Electronics Show, you could also get into this adult show.
Speaker: So I went to that and the Fleshlight people had a booth. And I had never really even like considered that. a masturbation toy like that.
Speaker: But I saw what they had and I was like, Hmm, this is this seems pretty interesting. Maybe I should order one. So I did order Fleshlight. And, ah so that was my first, first sex toy and got it in the discreet Brown packaging.
Speaker: Uh, opened it up and yeah, had a good amount of fun with it. Although I will say like masturbation sleeves in general, I end up finishing too quick with them. Like I can't go for very long with those. Like it's just too much stimulation. Even if there's no texture inside the sleeve at all, it's just too much for me. Yeah. So I, while I enjoyed having it, it's like, well, I can't really like use this for a long session or anything because it just becomes too much. And then I'm, I'm, it's over too quick.
Speaker: Right. I, I think my first was so after we both started exploring anal.
Speaker: So backing up and putting context, um, When the subject came up, it was kind of a, well, I've heard prostate stimul simulate stimulation feels really good, and and I'd like to try giving too. So if if you'll receive, you know, you've got toys, I will too.
Speaker: Right. And I mean, that's also only fair. Like if you're yeah going to expect anal sex from your partner, you should also receive some in return to see what it's like. So after it was added to our repertoire, um and she was like, she had found a new favorite vibrator.
Speaker: And so took the one that that one replaced and said, here you go. Knock yourself out. This one's for you. i don't want this one anymore. This one's yours. i found a new man.
Speaker: no Yes. um Which, you know, coincidentally enough, the, the new favorite was rather than a, a standard, you know I don't remember if there's an actual word, but basically a, I mean, they're all penetrative vibrators, but it was a G-spot vibrator rather than just a standard.
Speaker: Oh, okay. And so so the it it was a pure romance. It was called Thumbs Up because it looked like giving a thumbs up. That's an excellent. but it was But it was kind of curved. Well, that might actually i ah yeah might actually feel pretty good.
Speaker: Well, it I think it would be too soft. The thumb part, I believe, would be too soft and rubbery to be effective on a man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That makes sense.
Speaker: But you I got, you know, it was just you basic you know, silicone with a bullet inside of it. And, uh, you know, but it, it did the job.
Speaker: it did And that was the first, uh, prostate stimulation you had and you enjoyed it. Yeah. And it it wasn't direct prostate stimulation just because of the shape of it.
Speaker: Yeah. But it still, still felt fine. Nice. Very nice. Yep. Well, we've we've hovered around the butt for a little yeah while.
Speaker: So let's flip over to the other side and quickly talk about some ah some things for your penis. And I want to talk about cock rings because they're some of my absolute favorite cock rings. of of toys. And of course, a cock ring is either a silicone or a metal ring that goes around the base of your penis and usually your balls as well. And you put that on to give yourself firmer erections and delayed orgasm, although your mileage may vary on that, and increase sensation. And what it does is it restricts the blood flow
Speaker: to the penis so that once the blood is in there, it stays in there a little bit longer. And so you'll have a harder erection. And of course, depending on what size ring you get, it can be really tight or less snug.
Speaker: ah it's It's really sort of a matter of comfort and what you're comfortable with. Right. I mentioned they're made of silicone or rubber. Then those kinds are stretchy and very easy to to remove. And then you have metal rings, which are like the pro level.
Speaker: of cock ring and I happen to have a couple of metal rings and there's a brand I really like primal rings makes some really great cock rings that are metal and that was my first metal cock ring and I had to learn how to put a metal one on which you know, I'd see pictures online of like really tight metal rings. And I'm like, how the hell do people get that? ah It turns out you do it one ball at a time. so I did not know that beforehand. But yeah, you slip one ball through and then the other ball through and then your dick goes through.
Speaker: And of course, depending on sizing and a lot of the places that sell cock rings will have like a sizing guide. But I had to like get a little string and put it around my cock and balls and then like measure out and figure out yeah what size uh that i needed it turns out i needed a really large ring which i don't consider myself that well endowed but it was very ah affirming but was was it a nice ego boost it was a very nice ego boost yes i need the xl cock ring yeah
Speaker: And of course, there are ah straps that you can get or like little lasso type ah rings that you can get that are easily adjustable. So if you're worried about getting this thing off after you get off or before you get off, ah you can do that more easily with a strap. And I had that was actually my first cock ring was a leather.
Speaker: strap model that I bought ah in the Castro area of San Francisco at a store that was like ah it it was a leather strap that also was a ball spreader.
Speaker: so that was kind of an interesting thing. I took the ball spreader part off because that kind of hurt and chafed a lot. I didn't like that part, but I liked the the leather strap. That was very good.
Speaker: And I know people still have leather straps that are adjustable, and they're very nice. I had, it my first was kind of a a rubbery, like, but ah The best way to describe it is like a bolo tie type. Yeah, yeah, yeah. type win that That damn thing did not want to stay on because the the slide would just like not stay where it was taught. And so yeah that thing lasted like two attempts at use.
Speaker: Yeah, I bought one of those because I thought, oh, that looks kind of cool. Let's see how useful it is. And I also ran into the situation where it just didn't stay tight.
Speaker: Yeah, it well, and it also, for the first time out, it's like, okay, this will be easy to get on and off because if I need to get it off quickly, this will be yeah my but my best option. Well,
Speaker: You don't have to worry because it won't stay on. It's not going to stay on anyway, so it's fine. yeah there There are also some that, ah you again, thank you, Pure Romance.
Speaker: ah They are not sponsoring this episode. Not a sponsor yet. But ah there are also some that if you have a woman as a partner, that will have clitoral stimulators.
Speaker: m Right on them. ah So you we have a couple of different silicone rings that have those clit stimulators, one of which has a spot, right? but actually Well, I say does, but that remember I mentioned once that had two silicone toys that leaned up against one another and melted together.
Speaker: oh right. That was one of them. Okay. That was one of them. um But it had a spot like right below the stimulator to put a bullet vibrator in. Which, you know, the one or two times that we used it felt pretty nice for both of us. Oh, yeah. Okay. I've never tried a vibrating cock ring or one that you can put the bullet inside.
Speaker: But, um, but yeah, we, we enjoyed it and then it, it died the death of silicone. If you don't store it properly. Right. Very, very important stuff.
Speaker: And of course, uh, you might not want to wear a cock ring for a long time. You know, the common guide is you 30 minutes, Of course, I've seen people talk on Reddit ah that they wear them all day. And sure, if if if you could do that comfortably, then fine. My own experience on that is I can usually wear one for a couple of hours. i actually find the metal ones that I have more comfortable to wear for longer periods of time than the silicone ones, just because the silicone ones tend to start chafing.
Speaker: For whatever reason, then i will mention and I'll link to it in the show notes. i really like a there you can get different kinds of cock rings, but there's one brand that I like in particular. I think it's called exact.
Speaker: where they offer like a pack of cock rings. It's pretty cheap too, where you can get like three different sizes and then you can kind of see what works for you if you're new to it. And, ah you know, then you're not stuck with, some of the really cheap ones are like rubber bands and they break easily and it's just not a good experience. But if you get a nice silicone cock ring, you're probably going to have a pretty good experience with it.
Speaker: um being nice and and firm. And yeah, that's my favorite part of it. Really firming things up. I ordered a pack, I don't remember what brand, I ordered a pack of five that were three different sizes of just straight round, straight round, sit simple round silicone rings, just you know three different sizes, and then two different sizes of a thicker silicone rubbery that looked...
Speaker: that the best way to describe them, you know they they snapped on and they looked kind of like a collar. Okay. ah Because I liked the look of those. and I was like, hey, you know here's this set that is five with two like that that's the same price as this set over here that's just three of the regular round ones. And I i found that while I like the look of those snap ones,
Speaker: I have trouble keeping them on because of the width of them. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I definitely would recommend getting a couple different kinds if you're if you're into this at all.
Speaker: And yeah, I think part of it is the look because you want to get something that looks pretty nice. Yeah. Look of. So. and Really quickly, before we move on from the cock rings, they're more ornamental than functional, but I also i am a fan of glands rings or head rings.
Speaker: Oh, okay. ah Really? first I have never ventured into the glands ring waters. Yeah. Well, so i i first discovered that they existed when I was about to resume basically full-time nudism. And i was like, okay, there's got to be something that gives like some kind of visual interest. Basically jewelry because without having to pierce.
Speaker: Right. Without getting a Prince Albert, you wanted something that goes around the head of the penis, and that's a glands ring. And I started looking, and well, there they go. And of course, I have since, ah fortunately, I did not discover this through firsthand experience, but just from reading, I have found that in actual nudist circles, it's considered a faux pas.
Speaker: Because it's attempting to draw it's attempting to draw, it's seen by most as attempting to draw attention to your genitals. I see.
Speaker: it's seen as It's seen as sexualizing. Oh, okay. Okay. um But you know I've got four or five in different styles.
Speaker: And you some of them are, there's one of them that's a really lightweight aluminum that it is in entirely for aesthetic reasons. And some of them are heavier so that there's you know there's some weight. You can kind of feel the weight as you just you yeah go about your day.
Speaker: Yeah. and you while i presume that they could be worn for sexual activity you would definitely want to have a condoman oh yeah so it doesn't come off inside somewhere right Yeah, i have been wondering that. did Do you wear them while masturbating? like is that I have.
Speaker: Yeah? Does it add anything other than aesthetics? um It actually does prolong things. Okay. Because given where it rests, it's covering stimulation of the nerves right under the head.
Speaker: Okay. and That's interesting. So I have found that it does allow for prolonging, but so like that lightweight aluminum one, the shape of it is not conducive to wear while masturbating because it has like harder edges. Okay.
Speaker: on On the top and bottom, ah whereas some of them are more rounded. And so it's less <unk>s it's less of an obstacle while masturbating.
Speaker: got it But you know there's you one of them has like kind of a little pressure bead that the way you put it on, it goes under under the bottom, basically, on on the back of of the head. Okay. I'm trying to figure out how to describe it since it's a non-visual podcast. Right. It's an podcast.
Speaker: Right. ah right ah like if you If you're looking down at yourself... It's on the opposite side of what you see. Got it. So it it's got, um it's like just a round disc that kind of puts pressure there. I've seen similar designs that are more bead-like to put pressure there.
Speaker: And I've seen some that are just really wild looking that I'm like, no, that that is totally not my jam. That's too much. I've seen some that are in like, you know, coiled snake designs. Yeah. You can get crazy with it with glans rings yeah and cock rings both. Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah. but I mean, there are people also that just go to Home Depot or Lowe's and get like and ori rings that they use an O-ring that they use as a cock ring.
Speaker: If you want to get real cheap about it. I mean, when when I first thought about getting the glands rings, that's what I did to test. Oh, really? Okay. Because this is much cheaper than buying a purpose-built glands ring. Well, yeah.
Speaker: i I spent a buck it. on a round O-ring to see like, okay, is this going to be comfortable for me? Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker: Before spending, you know, 20, 30 bucks on one. Yeah. And so was like, okay, it's comfortable. Okay. O-ring goes in the trash and let me order something that is actually purpose made.
Speaker: Yeah. So good. Good idea. Good tip there too. Good tip for your tip. Yeah. All let's talk very quickly about masturbation sleeves because this fleshlight and similar kinds of ah devices that you might see.
Speaker: And, you know, they have textures on the inside that you can get, ah you know, ah a plain model or you can get one with a lot of ribbing or bumps or things to enhance the sensation.
Speaker: Of course, you can decide whether you want to hold it in your hand or whether you want to mount it to something like the Fleshlight Company has you covered in terms of selling you mounts if you want that. do Or ah there are hands-free strokers as well that kind of fit into the same category where you just kind of put it in there and it goes up and down and you don't have to do anything. i mean, that's, you know come on. You have to do something. but like i wouldn't I don't think I'd ever get a completely hands-free thing, but yeah some people must like it.
Speaker: now i I have had three or four different sleeves over the years. um Never went fleshlight. I made my crack about them resembling a 57 Buick on a previous episode.
Speaker: Yep. Hey, some people like that 57 Buick. That's true. Old, reliable. But I actually kind of got, not so much got tired of them. I decided that they were more trouble than they were worth for me.
Speaker: Yeah. Because I would have to get started, get hard. Okay, now I can use... the sleeve. So let me, know, let me squirt the appropriate lube in here. Now let me go to town. Okay. Now I'm done. Now I have to clean up myself and that.
Speaker: Yep. And I just, I don't, I don't want to do that. The last one, my, my lovely wife bought me one, Several years ago, it appeared romance, but after she stopped selling, but remained a customer, bought one for me that is still in its sealed packaging. All right. You got to bust that out and pop its cherry. but But I have had you just a basic one. There was one that had beads
Speaker: in the underside of it that could be removed. And oh they were they were designed to, you could remove them if you just didn't want them. You could remove them for cleaning.
Speaker: Or the same bullet that went in that cock ring could go into the slot that the beads went in. Oh, interesting. Okay. so And they they advertised it that way. i think I think both were purchased at the same time for me.
Speaker: Gotcha. And that one with the beads is the one that melted onto that ring. Whoops. Yeah. but word Word of, word of advice.
Speaker: Those of you listening out there do not store silicone toys on top of silicone toys. No. Yeah. Make sure there's room in between them so they don't accidentally fuse together. Cause that's no fun.
Speaker: i would I would recommend either wrapping them in a handkerchief, a cloth handkerchief. I would recommend store them in spare socks.
Speaker: Oh, that's an interesting idea. that That you don't, like, yeah you've lost the mated sock store in there. Or um we have, we we bought a bunch of basically dice bags for all of you tabletop gamers out there that they're they're the same type of bag as inexpensive dice bags and they're just cloth drawstring bags that that's what all of our stuff is stored in now so each each toy has its own individual bag
Speaker: I cast masturbation sleeve. Yeah. Yes. um True, true story. um I have supported over half a dozen Kickstarters for a role play, a, an X rated role playing game series meant for couples.
Speaker: five a amazing starter Very nice. Very nice. All right. Maybe we should get into the anal toys. Or should they get into us? and They get into us. That's true.
Speaker: ah Of course, it's not just for women and they're of the vibrating and non-vibrating variety and all kinds of sizes, shapes, colors.
Speaker: If you want alien molded ones, you can get that. Kind of crazy stuff here. ah yeah there's there's a lot of options when it comes to Diltas.
Speaker: there There absolutely are. there are If you go with vibrating, you have options for how they vibrate. yeah they may It may just be on and off. It may go through cycles of different patterns of vibrating. There's vibrating and there's thrusting.
Speaker: There's... there there is a wide wide variety if you if you want to get really really daring there are some app controlled ones that have a that have a community feature that you can open up the app go in the community and some random person who also has that toy makers app can take control They can take control or there are community made vibration patterns as well on some of these. Like can be pretty, ah pretty interesting there.
Speaker: Well, besides all that, there's different kinds of materials. You have your body safe silicone, ah ah surgical grade glass, which is really interesting. i don't have any glass toys personally.
Speaker: Then you have stainless steel, which I have an en Enjoy Pure Wand. en Enjoy makes a very premium product. sex toys out of stainless steel. They have several butt plugs and the pure wand is a sort of crescent moon type ah steel implement that has a large head on one side and a smaller head on the other. And i actually really like this toy for prostate stimulation. I think it's really good for, but also, i I think women like it as well. It's pretty good for them too. And the great thing about stainless steel is it cleans really well.
Speaker: You can put it in the dishwasher, which I have done by itself with no dishes and, uh, you know, you you clean it off and you can you know use it with multiple partners, which I think is is good. You can't do that with silicone toys because they are somewhat porous. They can keep bacteria on them. So you don't want to like yeah use the same silicone toy with multiple partners. But stainless steel or glass is a little bit of a different different kind of thing.
Speaker: And you mentioning that you put it in the dishwasher just made me think of that CSI episode with the swinging party. And they walked in looking for evidence for something. It just opened up the dishwasher and all of these dildos are in the dishwasher.
Speaker: Yep. Dishwasher safe. And i am I am amazed that that scene made it onto CBS. Yeah. Kind of amazed at that myself. And of course you can get dildos of various sizes and you want one with the flared base, of course. And a lot of these do have a sort of silicone balls on them.
Speaker: And I happen to like the ones that have the suction cups so that you can put it on something. Maybe you're going to use it in the shower and can go on the shower wall real easily or on a floor or some, I've seen some people put them in like a a doorway and use them that way.
Speaker: Like I've seen all kinds of things on the internet, but I i do like the suction cup base. I have a dildo that is a nine inch, pretty girthy one that has a suction cup base on it. And I do like that, uh, toy quite a bit. And the suction cup base makes sure that it stays in place while I'm having, some fun with it.
Speaker: Nice. Yes. Nice. Let's move along to prostate massagers, which is a little bit different. Yes. Than dildos. ah These are sometimes sold as medical devices, you could say. ah But there are companies that make prostate massaging ah specific devices, and you can get vibrating or non-vibrating in this as well. And the main company,
Speaker: that I think most people know is Aneros. And yeah they make they have a couple of different models. I think I've tried most of them in my own journey with prostate massage. And i like ah each model in a different way. And then for me, prostate massage is less about... Because you know you put this thing in your butt and usually there's a nice...
Speaker: sort of angled head on it where it's going to definitely stimulate or move on your prostate. And for me, I, ah you know, a lot of people on the internet and sometimes not on the internet will say that this is the way you get a prostate orgasm or like a hands-free prostate orgasm.
Speaker: I have never been able to do that with any prostate massager. Like I, have not either. Massagers mainly in addition to penile stimulation because yes it can really enhance and like ramp up the feeling for me anyway, during, ah you know, maybe it, maybe it's a blow job or maybe it's masturbation, but I think it, for me anyway, prostate massagers really elevate that experience.
Speaker: quite a bit and i don't really start to feel it until I'm getting very close to the end. And I will say that I've never had one hands free because maybe I could, but it ends up feeling so good that I can't not touch myself.
Speaker: Right. i I'm in the same way on that. Definitely. Definitely. And usually at least the massagers that I've used aren't going to stay in place well enough to use those during like PIV sex.
Speaker: ah They do kind of pop out or move around quite easily, especially if you've got and everything lubed up. So ah for prostate massage, I probably wouldn't put those in during PIV. Yeah.
Speaker: And we'll talk about butt plugs in a second, but that's more a butt plug job. Yeah. Yeah. And there there can be a bit of a learning curve yeah with a prostate massager. I'm right here raising my hand.
Speaker: The first time that I used mine, i thought I had wasted my money. Yep. Same. I thought I had wasted my money. I've heard on the internet that this is supposed to be great. Nothing is happening.
Speaker: i'd heard on the internet and I had watched videos linked from Anna Rose's site. And these guys are just thrashing around like they are in a remake of the exorcist.
Speaker: ah Right. And so, so I was a little intimidated by that. and And also you're like, I got to get me some of that. Yeah. But he here's the way that I have always described it to anyone who, who asks about them is that the less I try to make it work, the better it works.
Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. I would agree with that. And that, that was my problem. I was trying to make it work. I was also kind of in my head about it. And I'm sitting there going, okay, so so when when's this going to start?
Speaker: what what do i need to do What do I need to do to you know make my head spin around? yeah And nothing was happening. And about that about the time that I said, well, fuck it, I just wasted this money.
Speaker: i knew I just kind of... You gave up and hadn't taken it out yet. Yeah. But once I once I was there not trying to make it work and was relaxed, I moved the right way just by accident.
Speaker: Yeah. That it rubbed the right spot. Yeah. which then kicked off the cycle of how the non-powered ones are supposed to work, which made my muscles contract, which made it rub again, which made the muscles contract, which made it rub again. i was like, oh, hey.
Speaker: this is how it's supposed to work. Yeah. Yeah. And, but you in all of the years since I've got it, I have to be in the right head space to use it for it to be something other than just a hunk of plastic that's in my butt.
Speaker: Right. Right. For me, i don't even think I've ever really gotten to the point where my muscles are contracting in that right way. Like you described. Yeah. I either have to move it myself by like, you know, thrusting my hips while I'm sitting a, on a bed or on a chair, or I just don't move it at all. And while I'm masturbating, then it, you know, is already there on the prostate anyway, and is making everything feel really good.
Speaker: Now here's the part that made me kind of laugh. Yeah. i I bought it, ah went to a a local like condoms to go condom sense because I saw that they carried them and ah went in to look, see what they had.
Speaker: But I was like, okay, well, it's not payday yet. I'm just looking to see what they've got and what I want to get. Salesperson comes up and asks me if I need any help. i was like, well, you know, I'm just looking, but I...
Speaker: Perfectly lovely person shows me what all that they have when I say that I'm not ready to buy yet hands me a store discount card for some insane like 30 or 50% off when I'm ready to buy and so went back about a week later got it. I picked out the Aneros UFO okay because it was slimmer. So it looked less intimidating for me because yeah it's the first one that I'm going to have. It's like, man, it looks like a bony finger.
Speaker: it's like yeah It's like a white. like Yeah. It's like that the Helix, their their main model, that that thing looks huge. I'm not sure that I could get that in. So that's what you thought at the time. at the time yeah So I get home and, you know, I'm unboxing it and everything.
Speaker: And I start looking through the catalog and, And the catalog says that the UFO is for expert level. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the Helix says that it is for beginner. And I was like, what?
Speaker: I got the wrong one. no i was like, what? the The monster is for the beginner? And the one that's easier to get in is? How is that expert? And then I got to thinking about it. and it's like I was like, ah, more surface area on the Helix.
Speaker: So you're more apt to hit the prostate. but That's true. Yeah. That's gotta be what it is. think that is true. See, I'm over here. Like I got the Helix first and that was nice. And then I ended up with the UFO as well.
Speaker: And then I just went progasm, which is like pro level, but it's larger too. And, ah so I actually, I really liked the progasm. I ended up buying, I ended up gifting my progasm to a friend and then buying another one.
Speaker: but Now i might I might need a new toy. It's been a while since I've bought a new toy. they It's only been like a year. I need a new toy though. They're pretty fun. i did get ah's I don't know if it's a prostate massager. I don't know if you would call it that, but I got this toy from Fort Trough that they don't sell anymore.
Speaker: But in part, it was because so I have a few like vibrating prostate massagers, and the vibration never really did much for me at all. I needed something stronger.
Speaker: And so I bought this toy off of Fort Trough. I don't think they sell it anymore. Or they sell like a lower-powered version, I think. I don't know why. But I watched the video for this toy and they were showing how much it vibrates. Like this was the big appeal of it. And they like put it in this wooden box and just like is dancing all around this wooden box vibrating. I'm like, holy shit.
Speaker: This is exactly what I need. Actually, that toy And it has different vibration patterns as well, like most vibrating toys. That thing, I can put it in there and it hits the prostate and it just like milks it out of me. and just I don't even have to do anything.
Speaker: It is the most vibrating-est vibration toy I've ever experienced but in general vibrating toys don't do all that much for me which i'm sad about actually except for that one yeah yeah i i'm i have aneros pulled up right now so i'm looking for the progasm i think i might need a new toy i have the progasm it's on sale
Speaker: I said that they have the Black Ice on their site. cur oh that's a good one, too. I mean, they're all good. But anyway. ah they They also are not sponsors yet. They are not. Maybe in the future. Who knows?
Speaker: ah Let's talk about butt plugs. So i waded into the butt plug waters ah during my exploration period. So the last like two years.
Speaker: And I've really only ordered from Square Peg Toys. And they make like nice handcrafted silicone toys. ah mainly butt plugs and they have a load of different sizes and their site is very extensive in terms of like picking which one is the right size for you like their particular models and you then pick the size so I ended up with like an egg-shaped toy from square peg toys and I really enjoyed that and a friend of mine
Speaker: we were doing We were doing a little exchange. I gave him the Progasm, and he gave me this Fort Troph toy called the Robo Rimmer. which is a vibrating butt toy, of course. All right. Like sim that simulates rimming because it's got like, I don't know, steel beads in there that like spin around. It's very, very complicated. But anyway, the toy was so large that he couldn't use it. And I was like, well, give me that.
Speaker: Like, I'll, I'll try to take that on. Challenge accepted. So then I tried to put it in and i it wasn't it wasn't going. like I couldn't get it in either.
Speaker: And so I ended up doing going the butt plug route in part to like gradually size up so that I could accommodate the robo-rimmer. And so I got myself two square peg butt plugs.
Speaker: They're called the Egg, and those were real nice. And square peg toys, like the silicone that they use, is very nice, very pliable, very soft. It's really great, actually.
Speaker: And you can wear their toys while having PIV sex or while having sex in general. And the two plugs that I got didn't quite get me ready for the Robo Rimmer. So I ended up buying like one of their toys called the Acorn, which is a much larger plug.
Speaker: And I got one that was like a size up from what the Robo Rimmer would be because the the silicone in the square peg toys thing is so pliable and so soft. that I thought, okay, if I go with like a size up,
Speaker: get this thing in there, then I'll be able to take the RoboRimmer, no problem. And this thing is huge. This thing was really... Acorn toy was huge.
Speaker: And I had to work for maybe about a week, a week and a half of like trying to get it in there and then not quite being successful, but like you know working up to it. And because it's soft, it can get like halfway in.
Speaker: Anyway, I did eventually get the acorn in, and it's a ridiculous size. That's But it was it was also so good. Like I didn't even realize how much I needed the size until this challenge. And then I was able to get the robo rumor in no problem. And it was very pleasurable. So, but I think now I need to work back up to the acorn because it's been a while on that one. And I mean, the good thing is that the the muscles of the rectum
Speaker: and anus like stretch really nicely. ah you have to build up to it. Of course, you may have to, you know, buy a couple of different size toys to get yourself up to that level. But, uh, I mean, since that I've gone to various sex toy shops and seen things that are way larger than a toy that I have. And my mouth is just like,
Speaker: my jaws just dropped at the size of those. Like who in their right mind could take that? I'm not up for that challenge. That's a challenge I will not be accepting.
Speaker: Yeah, I got a few inexpensive plugs for the same reason. I had gotten myself a new vibrator and was having trouble accommodating it.
Speaker: Right. So I just i got an inexpensive set of of different sizes to work up to it. so Yeah.
Speaker: But it worked. Cool. There was one sex toy shop online that I ordered from that gave away like a butt plug as a free gift. And when I got it, it was the tiniest butt plug I'd ever seen.
Speaker: It's like, I am not even going to feel this. ah Exactly. is So small. i was like, is any guy going to feel anything from this? i don't know. Maybe somebody who has never even had a finger up there is going to be maybe into this.
Speaker: i don't know ah all ah All of the guys we were talking about up top. Yep. Yep. ah Yeah, and by the way, like with butt plugs, or and when you're sticking anything up your butt, flared bass.
Speaker: Remember that flared bass? Yes. the The square peg toys have a really nice flared bass. There's probably no way you would get the whole thing in there.
Speaker: Uh, I'm not even going to try, but yeah, you you don't want a toy to accidentally slip past your sphincter and just sit there. That that doesn't sound good at all.
Speaker: All right. i think we should talk about our favorite toys. Do you have a favorite Grayson? My favorite is probably my Aneros because when I'm in... the UFO?
Speaker: Yeah. Okay. When I'm in the right headspace, it is a it never fails. it's a guarantee. yeah i I used to have a a vibrator that my wife got got us from Pure Romance. It was a it was designed as an anal vibrator.
Speaker: It had a very punny name. It was the Bumdiggity. Amazing. it it had It was very nicely shaped. It worked really well.
Speaker: And it died oh a couple of years ago. yeah And um you know i by that point, it was a discontinued model through them.
Speaker: So couldn't replace it through them. And I didn't see couldn't find anything anywhere that was the same design. I ordered one that was similar-ish and the same size, but he i I don't like it as much.
Speaker: So it moved the aneros back into the top slot. Nice. Very nice. Because that one was just perfect size, vibrated, did the job.
Speaker: Everything worked so beautifully. It waterproof, so could use it in the shower. Perfect. Yeah. and Also important. And it just died.
Speaker: and i'm sure part of I'm sure part of why it was discontinued, it was back before everything that's powered was rechargeable. Right, right. So it was AA's, I think, one or two AA's in it.
Speaker: And of course, everything has since gone rechargeable. Right. Everything has its own charger. and Which, things yeah if i if I'm being honest, I would rather they went back to Alkalines.
Speaker: Yeah. Because there's, here here's old man yells at cloud moment. And first world problems moment. There's nothing more frustrating than when you're wanting to get one of your toys out and use it. And you, you have the time, you have everything all set aside. You're in the mood to want to use it. Yep.
Speaker: And it's dead. It's not charged. It's not charged. It has lost its charge. If it, if it used alkaline batteries, you could just swap them out. Yep.
Speaker: Pretty much. Yeah. there's There's my first world problems moment of of the show. You know, I'm going to say my top pick is also an Aneros product. They're not sponsors. But it is the Progasm for me. I think that's the one i use most often. I'll even like ah bring it into the shower with me if I just want to have a shower wank or something, have a nice shower.
Speaker: prostate uh stimulator there because i find like using my finger it's just it it's awkward it's just it doesn't quite spot reliably so yeah that's probably my favorite and of course uh cock rings i mean can't go wrong with a nice silicone or metal one i mean though those accoutrements are uh are a big hit with me Nice.
Speaker: But what I, what I really want to know, however, because we have listeners and they probably have some sex toys of their own. i want to hear what guys out there, what are our listeners using? What have they found most successful using? are they a prostate massage fans? ah Have they found ah something that works for them? Vibrating, non-vibrating?
Speaker: ah You can hit us up on socials or you can email podcast at by men on filter.com and tell us about it. I would love to hear what other guys are using to, to get off with. And If you're a new user, ah you know, what toy have you selected? And I want to hear like how it went. Like if you haven't done prostate massage before and you bought a toy, like I want to hear how it went.
Speaker: Love to hear that. Yep. That would be fun. Indeed. Give us recommendations too. Yeah. We're always looking for recommendations. I'm always looking for more things to try out.
Speaker: Yes. ah If you're listening to this show, hopefully you've enjoyed it. Rate us on your podcast app of choice. That really helps other people find the show. And it also just gives us a really warm feeling when we go into the dashboard and see that somebody has rated us five stars.
Speaker: Yes. Yes. where else can they find us, Grayson? Well, they can find Byman Unfiltered at Byman Unfiltered, all one word, on Facebook, Instagram, threads, and Twitter.
Speaker: x whatever we're calling it this week. And at by men unfiltered.com on blue sky, or like Sam was saying, if you have a story question or a toy related confession, the the dirtier, the better, because I'm perp, send it to podcast at by men unfiltered.com and your vote. If you are okay with us sharing that on the show, just add okay for air somewhere.
Speaker: Yes, indeed. So next episode, we're going to talk about something that I think hits every bi man on their journey. And that's the question of, am I bi enough?
Speaker: Yes. Are you hit a bi enough dude to rescue the president? No, wait, that's a different thing. ah We are going to find out what that means, what that questioning means, like and talk all about that in the next episode of the show.
Speaker: We will see you then. See you next week. Bye-bye. Bye.
