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Victoria Astuto
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Victoria Astuto is a musician, composer, videographer, and educator based in the Hudson Valley. Her debut EP, The Place features clarinet, saxophone, flute, bass clarinet, synthesizers, and vocals to create dreamy, lush, and atmospheric textures. The album is inspired by a cross country trip she took which influenced many of the themes ranging from loneliness to finding a place in the world to escaping a place you’re already in. Additionally, Victoria scores films for indie filmmakers in NYC, utilizing her large palette of instruments to create dense orchestration inspired by the works of Johnny Greenwood, Gerald Busby, and Bernard Herrmann. You can find her album and music videos on YouTube, Tidal, Apple Music, Spotify, and Band Camp.
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Transcript
Introduction to the Podcast
00:00:02
Speaker
You are listening to Something Rather Than Nothing. Creator and host, Ken Valante. Editor and producer, Peter Bauer.
00:00:12
Speaker
The light pops in
00:00:35
Speaker
To go soon
00:01:47
Speaker
Don't always have intros like that.
Victoria's New Album 'The Place'
00:01:51
Speaker
Victoria's Tutu, that is the first draft of Victoria's new album, The Place.
00:01:59
Speaker
um And that was the intro. Victoria, I'm going to talk a little bit about you before. So ah you might be a but you know horse behind the gate here, ready to go, but I get to talk about you.
00:02:14
Speaker
sounds good ah Victoria was a guest on episode 191 with Matthew Kyle Levine. And actress, musician, songwriter, singer, educator.
00:02:34
Speaker
um I'm familiar with your work. ah yeah acting and hearing your music.
00:02:46
Speaker
I really love the art that you create, and um I found your acting,
00:02:59
Speaker
ah in the short films by Matthews, sometimes stone and trusted hands to be like distinct performances. And I know that might be tough to lean into, it but I'm just being very particular about that.
00:03:16
Speaker
um So happy to have you here. um Tell us about The Place and what we just heard and the new album. There you go.
00:03:30
Speaker
Of course. Well, incredible intro. Thank you so much. I'm so excited to be here. um Yeah, The Place was kind of a project over, i don't even know, a few months of kind of just like thinking about what my debut music was going to be because it was something I hadn't put out and I've spent a lot of time just as a classical musician and playing a lot of other people's music and never really diving into what my own sound and what my own voice would be.
00:04:01
Speaker
this was a ah scary project. i'm Not scary, but like an undertaking for sure and something I feel like changed after completing it. um And yeah, the place was inspired a lot by I think finding places that are meaningful to you, whether it's like a mental place or a physical place or a place in your memory or a place with somebody else that feels safe and feels like home and feels like where you can find yourself.
00:04:33
Speaker
Um, yeah. And the album was and written and recorded kind of in between a time for me of, was a teacher for, you know, five years in public school and kind of was transitioning actually out of ah public school um into more of a freelance you know, lifestyle, where now I just do a lot of videography and editing and music and scoring for films and playing gigs.
00:05:05
Speaker
ah So I feel like this was kind of the ending of me figuring out, kind of just like transitioning from one part of my life to a new part of my life and like finding that place for me where I felt the most myself.
Emotional Journey of Album Completion
00:05:21
Speaker
Yeah. but about When you heard it like the final product, like take your brain before, like, what is my what does my sound sound like? And the final product, like, what's that thought space there? Like, your reaction when you're like, this is my this my thing.
00:05:42
Speaker
Yeah, it's funny. It's hard to, in the process of, um I recorded everything and like wrote everything myself, just like in my apartment and have a little kind of like a little studio set up and then had sent it off to someone to mix and master it for me.
00:05:57
Speaker
And the process of the back and forth of like, okay, what do you think about this? And how, what about this mix? And I was like, oh my God, I don't know. This might sound bad. Like it was hard to like hear myself after listening to it so many times.
00:06:10
Speaker
And then, when you get, I think get past that point of like, okay, like I did it and it's, and it's good. um I don't know. I felt really emotional listening to it.
00:06:22
Speaker
Like after it was like mixed and mastered and done, ah I was with Matt, which, you know, Matthew, and we just like cried like a parking lot listening to it together because it was just like, he was like, you made this. And I was like, I know it's, i don't know. I'm like getting a little bit welled up, like thinking about it. Cause it felt like,
00:06:45
Speaker
i don't This was something I feel like I really poured my heart into and felt really vulnerable with a lot of the tracks and writing it and kind of saying what's on my mind and on my heart. And yeah, it's emotional and i don't know, feeling just like...
00:07:08
Speaker
accomplished in a way that's like, I know who I am and I know, or I know who I am right now and I'm proud of who I am right now. And I think that's kind of what came out in the album.
00:07:20
Speaker
um This might be an idiosyncratic question, but I remember when I talked to on the last episode, there was the intense emotional content of the roles that and i haven and
00:07:38
Speaker
did formally well I feel throughout life at times I can be a master at times in certain situations but I remember feeling the an emotional intensity of like moving into that role and then when you're just talking about like kind of the vibe that I try to bu drop into the show like I mean I think this is my piece of art like listen to it like um what does this mean um So just about the the question was like, um in the creating the art art that you have and the way you've talked about a couple times about the like emotional, what's that like for you as ah as a creative, maybe even more into doing things that you haven't done, moving out of formal roles?
Overcoming Self-doubt in Songwriting
00:08:30
Speaker
What's that been like for you?
00:08:34
Speaker
It's, um yeah, it's been, i think when I first started writing songs, it was like really in my head about, I'm like, I don't even know if I'm good at writing and I don't really know if I like know what I'm doing.
00:08:48
Speaker
um But I think kind of getting out of, for me, i definitely like overthink a lot. yeah Great show. Great show for you. Yeah. And so i think getting out of my head of ah this like self-talk of ah yeah almost like imposter syndrome, I guess, of feeling just like, I don't really know if I'm, I'm just a clarinet player. i'm like, that's really it. Or I'm just a teacher kind of feeling like you're more than these titles that you've been given over the years or, you know, whatever that may be. think,
00:09:25
Speaker
so i think
00:09:28
Speaker
Sorry, i lost my train of thought. No, it was just about to like did the emotional, like, like that experience and moving through it. Like, the intensity of, like, your own individual, like, yeah process. so Yeah, I think working alone on the project mostly,
00:09:47
Speaker
um can be, I think, really, i guess, therapeutic in a way, because there were times where um like, okay, I think this is what I kind of want to write the song about. And how am I going to go about it? Because I feel like every song has like a different process of certain songs felt like I like sat down with like a guitar or the like, I use a lot of synths, like synth, and I'm like, I wrote it. And that's it.
00:10:12
Speaker
And like the lyrics, I know exactly how I want it to be. And then other times felt more I'd write all the music first ah because I do feel like aside from just through the words, through clarinet and flute and like all the woodwinds that I feel like speak to my heart and what I really love, um that felt like that really carried a lot of the songs and the vocals kind of fit within this other frame that I made.
00:10:39
Speaker
um but yeah, it felt... Yeah, some songs feel yeah really deeply emotional about things like thinking about my family or thinking about people in my life that have meant a lot to me or thinking about where I am in my life right now.
00:10:57
Speaker
ah So it's and it's an interesting like portrait, I guess, of my life right now. And it's interesting to think later. I'll like look back and like, oh, that's what I was doing when I was that age when I made my first album.
00:11:12
Speaker
um So I'm kind of excited to continue. i um There's a couple of things that popped in my head. um As you know, I i represent um yeah public school employees and for a lot of time I've represented teachers.
00:11:31
Speaker
teachers and One of the things that I found that was pervasive and is very particular about talking to you as an artist is that I felt that that the role required, or in general required, assumed or necessary sacrifices in most of the time women.
00:11:57
Speaker
in like what they want to do, how they want to express themselves. We could say publicly politics, art, that's a, she creating something else.
00:12:08
Speaker
Like, Blair Borax, had on a couple episodes back, she used to be a public school tea teacher, went into making music full-on stop and talked about the same type of thing. like It wasn't like there wasn't beauty in the work.
00:12:25
Speaker
The system's a top system, and there are sacrifices that I saw people make way of they couldn't quite be themselves or express themselves. And Purdue is an artist, right? So you go on.
00:12:42
Speaker
But the reason I can see it so clearly is because I'm a union rep. like I'm basically a separate entity. So I can observe. Definitely. And I can be like...
00:12:54
Speaker
me doing this program. mean, you're right. don't know the fuck what I want in my life pretty much. Amen. Thank you. I make sacrifices for it. I'm a mouth. But the sacrifices that have been particularly women dominated industry, mean, you experienced this. I don't have to tell you this, but um did you find like a wellspring or moving into what you're creating your yourself that you could breathe for or die over?
Transition from Teaching to Freelance Artistry
00:13:23
Speaker
No, no, i no, a hundred percent, hundred percent. I feel like, and I wouldn't, you know, I wouldn't trade my time teaching. And I think that was, an experience that also meant a lot to me. And, but I think it felt a little bit, um,
00:13:41
Speaker
stifling I was going to say that word. yeah like For a bit. And it's great. And I think it just, it was getting to a point for me where I felt like I wasn't being the fullest version of myself. And I was trying, like, I would go to school and then i'm like, okay, I got to get home and like write a song. yeah And then you're just like, you're emotionally exhausted because you're you know you're caring and teaching and being there for... i had at the time, I had like 200 students.
00:14:10
Speaker
So it was it's a ah big mental load to carry home every day. 200 students in their music class. In their music class. Yeah, fourth, fifth, and sixth grade. And and it was and it was fun.
00:14:25
Speaker
But I think the more i kind of became in touch with my own... artistic identity, which kind of started out with doing the films with Matthew. And then he was very encouraging to be like, you should write your own music.
00:14:40
Speaker
What's going on? yeah And it felt like that was like almost like a separate, like, I don't know who that would be. Like, I didn't know that person yet. And it kind of just... took and not to say I had to quit my job to write, make an album like this.
00:14:55
Speaker
I don't think everybody's got their own path. Everyone has their own path. Quit your job, write the album. Maybe it comes to that point. yeah That's all I'm saying. No. Okay. But it felt like, yeah, kind of moving into more ah freelance ah work, just like the schedule and kind of feeling i'm in charge of my life ah a little bit more than being on that strict schedule really helped, I think, open up my artistic potential or musician potential that I know was there, but I just hadn't really tapped into it.
00:15:30
Speaker
Oh, well, anyways, like on that, i'm but I feel ah feel like it's great to be able to chat with you about that. had recent conversation in conversations before with Blair.
00:15:42
Speaker
ah My partner, Jenny, is a public school teacher. ah special education expert. ah Absolutely incredible. incredible yeah But it's one of the things because I've been connected to the kind of history of public sector organizing, like women getting screwed over and their pay stores because it's women's profession, you know, kind of ideologies and thinking like that. So um good on the path and you're doing it. and Thank you for the art that you you're creating with it.
00:16:16
Speaker
I love the song titles and I just have to tell the listeners this. The Place Intro, 111. one eleven Empty, Noon, Sliver, Some Other Time, and the outro, which we will hear on the outro of the episode.
00:16:38
Speaker
Philosopher's Dream, some of those concepts and ideas and names. I think about... And listening to this music and speak he speaking about some of the work you've done with Matthew Kyle Levine, I'm always drawing back these pervasive, strong themes of place, out of out of sync.
00:17:06
Speaker
loneliness, separation, desire for connection, like just big, big ideas that are like right in front of me, uh, that I see. So I kind of took a particular joy in like connecting yeah like the way of approaching this to like, um, larger concepts.
00:17:26
Speaker
There's, um, He'd done some work scoring and with film formally. I know I saw the trailer for Matthew Kyle Levine's um yeah On the Phone.
00:17:45
Speaker
And um I was just wondering, I know you work on that project, but if you could just kind of tell us about like you as the artist integrating with ah but the sound, the instrumentation, of course, with what we see on
Scoring 'On the Phone' Short Film
00:18:05
Speaker
the film. Can you just talk a little bit about definitely i do that? Yeah.
00:18:08
Speaker
yeah for yeah For On the Phone, um that was one a short film shot on 60mm film. And when we went into it, Matthew was kind of like, it needs to be like a lot of instruments. And I wanted to feel like really real and because he's done a lot of synth scores and there is a little bit of synth in um and the score for this one um but it was really heavily inspired by Three Women ah i don't even remember what year that movie is from I'll have to look it up
00:18:39
Speaker
um But they use a lot of like flute, clarinet, bass clarinet, and like really like densely scored. And that was kind of a lot of the big inspiration and kind of like a little bit of like Twilight Zone. and ah we both love, you know, Johnny Greenwood scores for like Paul Thomas Anderson films, but they're so, so beautifully orchestrated and also just so emotional.
00:19:03
Speaker
And that was a big inspiration for kind of a lot of the scores I've done. And so for this one, ah it was just one that I recorded, you know, here ah in in the Hudson Valley. And it was a lot of just like layers upon layers, like three flute layers, four clarinet layers, bass clarinet layers, just to make it feel really like I don't know. Like, uh, a good word. Figure it out.
00:19:32
Speaker
It feels, yeah, almost like you're kind of just like really trying to like get through uh, almost like, I don't want to say mud because it's not muddy.
00:19:44
Speaker
It's, you know, you can hear all the parts really well. Molasses maybe would be like it where you're like really trying to get through it. Uh, just, you know, I don't want to say too much about it, but it,
00:19:58
Speaker
I feel like mirrors what is going on in in the film. ah So that was a lot of fun doing that because I feel like I could really be like, all right, another clarinet layer, another this to really...
00:20:11
Speaker
enhance the emotional intensity of it to mirror what was happening in the film because we kind of went through like okay we need a song for this this this this this these scenes and how you know I kind of had free free reign of Matthew just being like whatever you think would fit you know but we obviously went through together and talked about it and then it was kind of left in my, in my hands to do it, which was a lot of fun.
00:20:38
Speaker
love the artistic collaboration. Sometimes like dipping into the dynamics there and how it, how it goes, how it develops is, um, is, is, is just ah lovely to connect with.
00:20:54
Speaker
Like as, as far as the process, I was, uh, listening to the album, the place and, uh, you know, I heard it in my head on vinyl and no, it was a smaller project. and there But just wanted to let know, like I was like, now in full admission, about an hour earlier, I dropped into flannel core, Taylor Swift, evermore like territory, which is very distinct. Yeah.
00:21:33
Speaker
It's starting get cloudy, it's starting to rain out here. But just the hearing. this but um just the hearing oh that heard in my head at the of an album with with with your work. So I wanted to let you know, i pray for an album, maybe we can fundraise, we're going to all this type of stuff we get that stuff on vinyl.
00:21:59
Speaker
But I've been talking about this.
Accessing Victoria's Music
00:22:03
Speaker
Can you tell, make sure you let folks know like discreet places to find the album and the video connected to it? Like how to,
00:22:15
Speaker
get to it all yeah definitely um i have i have a music video on youtube so you could just search my name and then i also have like the full album on youtube too with like album cover and then all my music is on apple music title spotify gonna get something up on band camp it's been on my list of things to do And yeah, on Instagram, trying to trying to post as much as I can with like Matthew's done a lot of great video for me too and kind of put together some cool kind of collage type videos of just some stuff we've over the years and kind of added that to my music, which is great.
00:22:56
Speaker
Yeah, i am you wouldn't know this, but the the sound, the way you created fell into like like my brain I listen ton of music like as far as certain areas. And what I heard and what connected to this thing, work, was I listened to Emily Jean, why they were so oh components of Poly Jean Harvey.
00:23:28
Speaker
yeah bless your heart and i heard like uh some of the space like musical space um is a wistfulness uh a haunting element so it's like i'm your target demographic i'm meant to the listeners right now too no screw it's my show i love it but i'm just telling you i appreciate it i appreciate it It's reaching the right audience. e yeah yeah you get So um thanks for letting us know
00:24:02
Speaker
ah ah where you find it. um Any, like, when I talk to you, moving from different projects and such, like anything like here, Autumn 2025, that like bits of pieces that are interesting you creatively or you want to dabble in?
00:24:30
Speaker
Yeah. I mean, I definitely, i want the full album to happen. I think that's on the, on the horizon. and need to start writing again. um other projects.
00:24:43
Speaker
Yeah. I've been, yeah just doing, doing film score, been uh,
00:24:50
Speaker
meeting a lot of different people from different parts of life, doing like videography stuff, like kind of in the city a lot, like meeting people. um trying to think what else?
The Influence of Hudson Valley's Autumn
00:25:03
Speaker
Well, tell us, had this one, this is a personal indulgence, ah Hudson Valley. Okay. Autumn. What's it like out there now? I'm hyped. It's hot still. It was like 80 degrees today.
00:25:19
Speaker
and it um'm i'm ready. i need the fall. like i wish there were times I'm like, maybe I should just go out to Pacific Northwest and like write my album out there because... I feel like that fits the aesthetic of my music for sure.
00:25:36
Speaker
yeah So i'm I'm waiting. I'm waiting for the Leafs to change, waiting it to start to feel like this is where this album fits. I'm so i'm so stereot stereotypical Pacific Northwest, which is messed up because you listen to me like, where the heck's this guy from, Florida, Illinois?
00:25:54
Speaker
But I drop into some distinct parts of the culture that just gorgeous. I'm always trying to explain it for the show. But um I wasn't even playing the Twin Peaks soundtrack. Like, that's what I do out here. I live in Twin Peaks.
00:26:08
Speaker
What else? What else could you Yeah. So I put the album on. I listened to it early. How could you not? It's too good out there. Yeah. There's... I think ah one thing if you do head out this way is like, you know, getting into the woods and like what there's like immersive, like what comes out of you musically when you've like heard those winds and they're smelling the Douglas fir and like,
00:26:38
Speaker
I love it out here. so i I mean, yeah, a lot of the album i wrote after being out West for about a month. I remember that now. i so like you were traveling. It was something a place you saw that really struck you.
00:26:58
Speaker
Yeah, I think i'm at the time we ah Matthew and I went and we kind of, we drive out. This is like, we've done it three times, four times.
00:27:09
Speaker
ah We'll drive out to the West Coast and kind of just like explore different places maybe we haven't been before. And so I think after that trip, we had done a lot of hiking, hiking, um in like Banff National Park and that kind of like areas like the Canadian Rockies. And those are some of the most beautiful hikes I've ever been on. And that was really incredible. And I think...
00:27:34
Speaker
Yeah, I think after that trip, I was like, oh, this is a place that's special. And so is port i think Portland. I mean, we love like Portland and being out there and kind of just feeling like there's just a different sense of community and artists and the love for art, whether it's like books and film and music, obviously, because there's million record stores.
00:27:57
Speaker
It really feels like... Being there and then coming back and i was like, okay, now have to finish. Now I'm going to finish the album. Yeah.
Inspirations from the Pacific Northwest
00:28:04
Speaker
Because, yeah, I had written... you soaked it up.
00:28:07
Speaker
Oh, it... I mean, the nature alone. We had done like a lot of hikes in Washington and kind of seeing the lushness of, you know, the tree. Everything's so green. It's so different than New York. I mean, in new York's beautiful also. yeah.
00:28:23
Speaker
um just in different ways. And so I think you get so used to seeing New York for what it, you know, I've lived here most of my whole life, mostly. And then you go somewhere else and you're like, and I've traveled other places, but something about Pacific Northwest is has a magic to it.
00:28:41
Speaker
And I think that really, ah inspired a lot of the album because I'd only written, I'd written the intro and the outro and then we left for a month. um And then when we came back is when I kind of like put the rest of it together.
00:28:56
Speaker
And a lot of it was ah was, excuse me, really inspired by that trip. It's all in there. Love it. i' So excited and glad. I mean, how romantic.
00:29:08
Speaker
What, three or four? Come on. I know. You're killing the audience. I know. Maybe it was three. Three to four cross-country trips. No, I get it. My partner, Jenny, and I, like if we were deliberate to do it so, we were down in there.
00:29:24
Speaker
I'm just messing with you. yeah But you know, some of the listeners are like, come on. yeah How sappy can we get three to four to create art together? I know. It's so... You get to dive into him as as as a human.
00:29:43
Speaker
so Yes. It's a great experience. Now, i um I yeah just wanted to let you know I really appreciate chatting with you dropping it to the art you create and and and Matthew creates. and it's It's just really exciting um because I think there's something this distinct going on with the art that you create that is noticeable.
00:30:13
Speaker
and like there's The energy to show the podcast for me is be like, i get slide And all of us who into art a lot times get way too excited about it.
00:30:25
Speaker
But part of it is like the history of art is like, oh my gosh, look at this art. It's so cool. Look at it too. And then people react in whatever way they do. But like, look how cool this looks. Like, I love this thing in and in sharing.
00:30:41
Speaker
So I just wanted to thank you for coming on again and and um yeah um the last track we got an outro on on the place. And I was just just wondering, you could take us out, maybe tell us a bit of your thinking about this track and the end of the album.
00:31:08
Speaker
but Definitely. Yeah, I feel like the whole album kind of goes on this journey of youre the journey of emotions where it's like you're figuring out the place and then like maybe you've found it but then something else strange happens where i don't know I feel like one of the tracks was really inspired by feeling like overstimulated in places and trying to find a place to escape and then maybe you escape but then something else crosses your mind and then I feel like you go through this journey through the tracks and by the end you've
00:31:43
Speaker
kind of actually feel resolved and I think that was the feeling I was trying to get by the end of like maybe you found the place and maybe it's short term but maybe it's really long term and I think that's kind of how the ending felt to me go where yeah resolution resolution exactly and maybe who for who knows how long but I think enough to feel calm and settled in the moment yeah It's beautiful.
Podcast Farewell and Listener Engagement
00:32:13
Speaker
Everybody check out Victoria's Doodos, the and all the places as well. but But here we go with outro.
00:32:26
Speaker
Lovely to see and talk to Victoria. Thank you for having me. Thank you.
00:32:40
Speaker
you
00:33:21
Speaker
This is Something Rather Than Nothing. And listeners, to stay connected with us and our guests, visit somethingratherthannothing.com. Join our mailing list for exclusive updates and access to guest-created art.
00:33:35
Speaker
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00:33:49
Speaker
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00:34:05
Speaker
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00:34:17
Speaker
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