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Ep. 15 - How Gratitude Unlocks Your Real Calling (Even in a Job You Don’t Love)
7 Plays3 days ago
In this episode, Ken Freire and Patrick Lowndes unpack the false belief that “I’ll be grateful when I finally get a better job” and show how postponing gratitude actually postpones your spiritual growth and calling. Set in the week of Thanksgiving, they explore how gratitude in less-than-ideal roles can unlock your marketplace purpose right where you are, share Ken’s near-death story that reshaped his perspective, and offer five practical habits to cultivate gratitude in your everyday work.
Resources Mentioned
- The Psalms (for examples of honest lament that moves into gratitude before God)
- Frontier Operators Community where you can get encouragement and support - https://frontieroperators.com/community
Timestamps
- 1:21 – The false belief: “I’ll be grateful when I get a better job”
Why waiting for a dream job to be grateful quietly suffocates your Monday–Friday and delays your growth. - 2:21 – How postponing gratitude hinders spiritual formation
Ken and Patrick explain how gratitude is more than a nice attitude—it's a posture that shapes how God forms us in our current roles. - 4:34 – Redefining gratitude in real life, not denial
Looking at David in the Psalms, acknowledging what’s hard while also recognizing God’s active presence in mundane, repetitive work. - 6:28 – Ken’s tumor story & discovering gratitude for the basics
Ken shares his near-death experience at 19, losing his voice for weeks, and how it awakened gratitude for simple things like breathing, walking, and just being alive. - 8:46 – Five practices to build gratitude in a job you don’t love
Daily hidden-good prompt.
The “gratitude ping” to a coworker or classmate.
Rewrite-the-complaint exercise.
The 10-second reset (and smile) when you’re irritated.
Keeping a weekly calling-through-gratitude log. - 15:24 – Gratitude, optimism, and a Thanksgiving week challenge
Why optimism can be a learned skill through gratitude, plus a challenge to be genuinely curious, caring, and grateful with family over the holiday.
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Transcript
Intro
Introduction and Gratitude's Role
00:00:08
Ken Freire
Welcome back to Buried Talent, the show for young professionals that tears down false beliefs about faith and work so you can unbury your God-given talent right where you are.
00:00:19
Ken Freire
I'm Ken Freire and here with my amazing co-host, Patrick Lowndes, and today we're talking about how gratitude unlocks your real calling, even in a job you don't love.
Thanksgiving Plans
00:00:30
Patrick
That's not possible. In a job you don't love, how's that even possible?
00:00:30
Ken Freire
Patrick, this is...
00:00:35
Ken Freire
It is possible. It can be hard at times, but that's what we're going to talk about. Before we jump into Patrick, it is the week of Thanksgiving, man. What are you planning for Thanksgiving with your family?
00:00:43
Patrick
Oh yeah.
00:00:46
Patrick
Well, Ken, we've got like a doubleheader going on. Okay. So like we're, we're like driving down by the time this, this podcast lands, we'll be in like a three or four hour drive down South to Portland, hanging out with my family for a couple of days, coming back up here, doing the other side of that doubleheader with Bethany's family.
00:00:49
Ken Freire
Ooh.
00:01:03
Patrick
It's going to be action packed.
00:01:05
Ken Freire
Oh, wow. We have decided just stay around our area because my wife is almost pregnant. By the time Thanksgiving comes, I think she'll be doing like three weeks.
00:01:12
Patrick
Yeah.
00:01:14
Ken Freire
So we're like, let's just stay, bunker down.
00:01:17
Patrick
That's a good call. That's a great way to keep your wife happy.
00:01:18
Ken Freire
Yeah.
00:01:20
Patrick
So nice work on that.
00:01:22
Ken Freire
Exactly. We don't want to do any more road trips for year.
Gratitude in Work Situations
00:01:25
Patrick
So on this podcast, we like talking about false beliefs, right? So I'm just going to jump into it because I know all y'all are just running around picking up turkeys at the last minute, wishing that you wouldn't have gotten like a nine pound bird because you didn't plan.
00:01:29
Ken Freire
Yeah. Let's do it.
00:01:39
Patrick
Today's false belief, you're like, oh, Patrick got me here on a Monday. The false belief is I'll be grateful when finally get that better job.
00:01:49
Patrick
And it sounds a little bit harmless, right? I was actually talking about this as sort of a church, kind of a community group. Someone was saying, I just want to get this a better job. And yeah, some jobs are like really difficult and your boss, your team is maybe toxic and you should be looking for another job. We're not saying don't look. But what we are saying here, the false belief is, well, I'll be grateful when...
00:01:49
Ken Freire
Yeah.
00:02:11
Patrick
And I think that that's kind of the point we want to hit at today is we don't want to suffocate like our Monday through
Gratitude in Growth
00:02:16
Patrick
Friday can. I mean, that's that's so how can we find gratitude and gratefulness even when we're not totally happy?
00:02:23
Ken Freire
Yeah, and here's the reality that if you don't, what could end up happening is that you get frustrated pretty easily, right? And it delays your growth. It is one of those things that God actually has called us to, to say like, hey, if we don't have a good attitude, it's actually going to hinder our spiritual formation, right?
00:02:46
Ken Freire
Because gratitude isn't like just this attitude thing that we do. It's a posture that shapes how God thinks of us. So when we postpone gratitude, we're actually postponing transformation.
00:02:59
Ken Freire
And that's what we're talking about, what we're talking about today.
Gratitude Beyond Milestones
00:03:02
Ken Freire
If you think about it, Gen Zs, right? They actually might believe this a little bit when they say stuff like, I'll be grateful once the job finally matches my purpose or my giftings.
00:03:13
Ken Freire
Or when I finally have this five-year plan set up. There's a lot of different ways that this can come about that we have to be very careful of. And if I'm honest, it can happen to me too. Like, oh, my job will be fulfilling to me whenever I get to do X, whatever X may be.
00:03:31
Patrick
Yeah.
00:03:31
Ken Freire
And little by little, when that thought starts to seep into your mind, you start to be complaining, blame shifting, arguing with people versus just having a heart of gratitude.
00:03:43
Patrick
Yeah. And we're not again, we're not saying that, hey, don't go after job that matches your purpose. I mean, we talk about this a lot, like the convergence of your profession and your vocation or calling.
00:03:53
Patrick
Like you should be seeking finding a place where you can actually have those worlds converge.
00:03:59
Patrick
But it's a journey. It's meant it's multiple years. So are you just going to be a stinker to work around like, man, that guy can't just. He is just like eking bad vibes and hurting the team morale. Like we got to be walking around as believers.
00:03:59
Ken Freire
Yeah.
00:04:13
Patrick
We've already been given so much so we can give. We've been served so well so we can serve. Right. So I think I think that's what we can find is we're told to chase these dream jobs. But I think at the end of the day, as Christians, we have to embrace everything that we've been already given. So when we show up, even if it's not the best the most fun, we can still have a great attitude.
00:04:34
Ken Freire
Yeah.
Gratitude and Reality
00:04:34
Ken Freire
So, Patrick, let's let's jump into what does gratitude look like? Because I think in our day and age, most people actually they hear the word gratitude and maybe young professionals might hear about it, but they think gratitude may come after you level up.
00:04:48
Ken Freire
And that's a trap. Right. So you actually start chasing the next thing.
00:04:50
Patrick
Yeah. Yep.
00:04:53
Ken Freire
And this even happens in social media. Right. You look at everybody else and what they have and you're like, I wish I had that. And that's what you start to think gratitude is, is like, oh, when I get that thing, I'll get it.
00:05:06
Ken Freire
But instead, want to notice what God is doing today.
00:05:08
Ken Freire
So how do redefine gratitude?
00:05:12
Patrick
Yeah, yeah.
Biblical Examples of Gratitude
00:05:13
Patrick
So like were just alluding to, this is not talking about living in complete denial of reality, right? So first things first is like, and you see this in the Psalms all the time. David was like, my enemies are coming and killing me, right? And he's like acknowledging like what's actually happening as he's running for his life.
00:05:29
Patrick
But then you notice many times he moves into having gratitude for the situation. So it's not pretending things are fine. acknowledging what's going on. And then here's the thing. acknowledge God's active presence in it.
00:05:41
Patrick
Right. Even in some of the mundane like, yep, I'm doing this, this mundane weekly task or this report that I have to do every week or have to go through the same implementation process with this customer or the same kind of client engagement or you fill in the blank.
00:05:55
Patrick
Is God active in there? Right. So we act. It's active in that. It's also, again, becomes like a switch for the more you're grateful and you're walking in gratitude, it lets you truly embrace what you're doing as part of your marketplace calling.
00:06:10
Patrick
So it unlocks more purpose in your daily work. And so again, if God is the one forming you and putting you in that job that you're in, even if you might not like it, maybe you do love it. Maybe you're really excited about it.
00:06:22
Patrick
That's awesome. But you don't just wait for gratitude at some point to get practical. It's like, no, like, Lord, I ask my daughters this all the time. Like, what are 10 things you're really grateful for about school today? And they're like, school? I'm like, yeah, school. Like, I go after the thing I know they're not excited about.
00:06:38
Patrick
I'm like, give me 10 things that you're really grateful for. And so you might have to do that as well. Make list of things you're grateful for about your job or a specific part of your job that you're having trouble with.
Personal Story of Finding Gratitude
00:06:53
Ken Freire
Yeah, you know, just to give you one solid example for me, many of you who don't know this, but when I was 19, I had a tumor in my neck, I had to get it removed. And like, it's a massively long story. But I'm giving you the short version.
00:07:06
Ken Freire
And remember I couldn't use my voice for like, eight weeks. And I was actually we were we were down in Texas, Patrick together. So for eight weeks, it's like,
00:07:14
Patrick
Yeah. Columbus was quiet there for like that eight weeks. No, just kidding.
00:07:18
Ken Freire
Yeah, it was. I mean, it was like for an extrovert is the hardest thing to possibly do, not have your voice. It was like, But the reason I bring that up is because I remember before they found the tumor, the doctors couldn't figure out what was wrong with me.
00:07:33
Ken Freire
And they thought I was going to die. Literally, I had one of the doctors tell me, like, I think you're going to die, like mentally prepare yourself. And as a 19 year old at the time, I'm like, oh, gosh, you know.
00:07:44
Ken Freire
So when they found out what I had, I remember being in the hospital bed. They had just removed the tumor. I could not get out of bed because I had my throat slit. It was just like a lot. It was pretty intense.
00:07:55
Ken Freire
I got new found love for the smallest things in life. And a heart of gratitude wasn't a future thing. It was a very moment reality. Like, wow, I have the ability to breathe today.
00:08:10
Ken Freire
I have the ability by God's grace to walk.
00:08:13
Ken Freire
My fingers are here. I'm alive. Like there was just so many things that I was grateful for. And I share that because like, I want all of you to recognize life can be really hard out there, but internally we have to be people who say, God, what are you doing presently in this reality that we can see that you're doing good for my good and his glory?
Practical Gratitude Exercises
00:08:35
Ken Freire
and when we start to ship shape our minds that way man gratitude can come a long way so let's give couple practical tips on on this okay with the last uh bit of time that we have here is we could talk about gratitude and being grateful but i know for me it's really helpful to just
00:08:36
Patrick
yep.
00:08:51
Ken Freire
have some really good practical tips on what does it look like. So five quick ones. The first one is a daily hidden good prompt. This is just something I like to do. Every morning I ask, what's one good thing God is forming in me through this season?
00:09:06
Ken Freire
And you just praying like, God, thank you that you are forming in me resilience or patience or skill building or clarity or being a good dad, whatever that may be. You're just constantly asking the Lord, God, what are you forming in me?
00:09:20
Ken Freire
So ask that question every morning. Patrick, what's the second one?
00:09:23
Patrick
That's a good one. All right, number two, I like this one, it's called the gratitude ping, right? And that means like, there a coworker that you could give them a ping, like a text or a message or Slack message or email or something to say, thank you for what you did today or like what you did yesterday, or I really appreciate how you show up and you bring some energy to our meeting or our Stand Up This meeting.
00:09:44
Patrick
And so I think if you just think about something that is genuine, that is small, but you just want to say thank you. And that little micro gratitude step creates like this again, this positive, this goodwill motion that again, as as Christians, like we're supposed to be full of joy and gratefulness. So how can we demonstrate that to our coworkers? So that also if you're listening to this and you're student, it might be someone in class, it might be a professor.
00:10:09
Patrick
But yeah, think about the gratitude pain. That's number two.
00:10:12
Ken Freire
Yeah, and the more you can be specific to, the better, right? You could just like, it's one thing to be like, hey, I'm grateful you're in this class. I'm grateful that you're a good human being. But like, if you were like, hey, I noticed how astute you are as a student. I really appreciate that. I want to be like you, right?
00:10:26
Ken Freire
People are going like, dang, that dude is nice, right? That dude is encouraging. I'm going to put Patrick on the spot here a little bit. I remember us being in Texas. I think this is something you are really well known for.
00:10:38
Ken Freire
one being intense and like, you're like, let's go after it. But you were just super gracious with people and super kind, like you were always just sharing kind words with people. And I remember that being seared in my mind when we were there for our second year.
00:10:49
Ken Freire
don't remember if you remember Danny French, right?
00:10:51
Patrick
yeah.
00:10:52
Patrick
Perfect.
00:10:52
Ken Freire
But like, and he would say the same thing.
00:10:54
Ken Freire
He's like, man, he's so encouraging. Right. So just find ways to to thank your the people around you. The third one is rewrite the complaint exercise.
00:11:01
Patrick
Mm-hmm.
00:11:06
Ken Freire
This is one that I have to work on because of my personality sometimes, can look at the negative pretty quickly. So I have to be mindful of like, no, no, no, I don't want to look at just a negative.
00:11:18
Ken Freire
I want to flip it. So the way you could do this is take one thing you dislike at work and rewrite it through gratitude. So you might say something like, hey, this frustrating task is strengthening a skill I'm going to need later.
00:11:33
Ken Freire
This is going to be spiritually and professionally powerful for you because you're reframing why you're doing that work.
00:11:40
Ken Freire
Or you might say, hey, I hate cleaning toilets right now. But you're like, I'm doing this because I'm doing everything for the glory of God. And I'm going to do this to love God the best of my ability.
00:11:49
Patrick
That's awesome. right. Number four, this is the 10 second reset. And can I just this one is difficult, especially when you kind of get like amplified about an issue going on and you just want to mean you got fight or flight and you're like, I'm going to fight.
00:12:06
Patrick
So the 10 second reset is when you feel irritated. I just think in the last seven days, maybe 14 days, when were you kind of a little miffed, little irritated at work?
00:12:17
Patrick
The reset says, hey, step back for a minute, breathe. And then notice one thing that you're grateful that God has done for you in this moment.
00:12:28
Patrick
Okay, so again, little bit like the last one, but this one is just more of like a reset. And then this is smile. This one's funny. maybe this should be called the smile reset too.
00:12:38
Patrick
Because if you smile, like physiologically, you're flipping how your body and your temple is interpreting the information in front of you, right?
00:12:38
Ken Freire
Yeah.
00:12:49
Patrick
So again, you might step back and be like, okay, This is how I'm feeling. And then smile. The example yesterday was was frustrated about a password I thought should have worked. And so I called customer support and the guy was like, hey, you have like another email you could use. I'm like, yes, but I accidentally created a new profile here. And then you started charging me and I got really mad because I'm already a customer and you're charging me again. And I could sort of hear it. He's just like,
00:13:14
Patrick
Yeah, but you could use the other email, right? And I just had to smile at myself and do a bit of a reset on that one. So that's number four. Maybe you've got to pause and do a reset. Ken, what's the last one?
00:13:26
Ken Freire
Yeah. And with the recess, sometimes what's helpful too is just thanking God for something. Like, Lord, thank you. Like, I know this sounds silly, but I do this quite a bit. I'll like smile. I'm like, thank you, Lord, that I get to deal with this obstacle in front of me right now or this irritation.
00:13:39
Patrick
That's good.
00:13:40
Ken Freire
I'm alive. Thank you. Because I a near-death experience, it always helps me to be like, thank you, God.
00:13:43
Patrick
That's good.
00:13:47
Patrick
Yeah. It's
00:13:48
Ken Freire
I could deal with this.
00:13:49
Ken Freire
Thank you, I could deal with my two-year-old who's drawing a temper tantrum right now. It's an opportunity, not an obstacle, right? The last one, the fifth one is keeping a calling through gratitude log, right? This is like just a weekly journal of just what did God show you this week through gratitude?
00:14:08
Ken Freire
What are the things that you're grateful for? Similar to what Patrick was saying with his daughter, let's just write the 10 things we're grateful for. And the more you write that down, the more you remember.
00:14:19
Ken Freire
Throughout scripture, there's plenty of times that God is saying in the Old Testament, remember my good works. Remember my faithfulness. Remember what I did for you when you were in exile.
00:14:30
Ken Freire
And God is saying those things because we are people who tend to forget what God has done. And when we forget what God is doing in our daily, weekly lives, what ends up happening we start to be like the Israelites in the wilderness that we're just complaining all the time.
00:14:36
Patrick
Yeah. Yeah.
00:14:46
Ken Freire
And we do this at work. Like, why did they pick me to do this spreadsheet? Why do they ask me to do these things? So you want to constantly be saying, no, no, no. I'm focused on God. I want to say, God, what have you done for me? What are you doing?
00:15:00
Ken Freire
And what can we be grateful for for next week? And the more you do this, here's the other thing that I just want to end up and wrap up with is there are many of us who might say, I'm not an optimist.
00:15:12
Ken Freire
Right. I'm a realist. I don't know, Patrick, if you ever heard those type of people, right, that they're like, don't want to call themselves a pessimist.
00:15:15
Patrick
Yeah, exactly.
00:15:17
Ken Freire
They're like, I'm a realist. Right. Optimism is can also be a learned skill. And that comes from being gracious or having a heart of gratitude.
00:15:30
Ken Freire
So when you have a heart of gratitude, it's easier to be optimistic because you're like, man, I know God's going to work through all these things. Patrick, any final words before we wrap up?
00:15:41
Patrick
I would just say you're probably be spending some time with family this week. So cycle back through of these five tips we just gave you about, hey, maybe you haven't seen these people in a while. Maybe it's been a minute, maybe a hot minute since you've seen some of these people. So my challenge to you is,
00:15:57
Patrick
Be genuinely interested. Care about what's going on in their life, right? Put yourself in their shoes and just go a little bit deeper. Enjoy some good food. Maybe some rest if you need Maybe you badly need some rest. Go get some rest.
00:16:09
Patrick
And we'll catch you next Monday for the Buried Talent podcast. Thanks so much.