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Rewire Your Stress Response with Dr. Morgan Nolte - E94
42 Plays25 days ago
What if your stress isn’t just something you experience, but something that’s quietly shaping your reactions, your health, and even your relationships?
Why do we keep falling into the same patterns under pressure, saying and doing things we later regret?
In this episode, we explore how stress lives in the body and the subconscious mind, and why traditional stress management techniques often fall short. From emotional triggers to deeply wired response patterns, this conversation reveals how stress can take control without you even realizing it.
We unpack what it really takes to shift your state in the moment, rewire your reactions, and create a new baseline of calm, clarity, and resilience, so you can stop being driven by stress, and start responding with intention.
Morgan Nolte, PT, DPT, is a board-certified geriatric clinical specialist and the founder of Zivli. After years working in geriatric physical therapy, she felt called to shift her focus toward disease prevention, helping people improve their health and quality of life before chronic conditions take hold. She is especially passionate about leading Emotional Brain Training, supporting individuals in creating lasting mindset and behavior change. Morgan lives on a farm in rural Nebraska with her husband, Justin, and their three children, where family life, faith, and simple routines like outdoor movement, strength training, and baking sourdough are central to her daily life.
“You find new words to a better circuit for love.” - Dr. Morgan Nolte
In this episode you will learn:
- Why stress circuits impact mood, energy, and key health choices.
- How emotional brain training helps beat old habits and low resilience.
- Simple tools for self-regulation and moving from stress to joy.
- The link between insulin resistance, chronic illness, and behavior change.
- Ways to use nurturing inner voice and joy points to support wellness.
- How rewiring brain circuits can improve mindset, family, and daily life.
Resources
- Connect with Dr. Nolte on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drmorgannolte/
- Listen to her podcast, ‘Reshape Your Health’: https://open.spotify.com/show/2T0tr9zrU0eOHSA71mUaoP
- Watch her YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@drmorgannolte/videos
- Learn more about her offerings at ‘Zivli’: https://zivli.com/
This podcast was produced by the team at Zapods Podcast Agency:
https://www.zapods.com
Find the products, practices, and routines discussed on the Alively website:
https://alively.com
Recommended
Transcript
Emotional Rewiring in Health and Wellness
00:00:00
Speaker
For me, it really changed my mood and my love. So how I mother, because my mood circuit was I get my power from being angry to the point that I scare my children and encode the same damaging wire in them because I would stress out and I would snap and I would yell at them.
00:00:15
Speaker
Didn't happen often, but when it did, it was ugly. And so you rewire that and you find new words to a better circuit.
00:00:24
Speaker
This is the Home of Healthspan podcast, where we profile health and wellness role models, sharing their stories and the tools, practices, and routines they use to live a lively life.
Dr. Morgan Nolte's Wellness Journey
00:00:38
Speaker
Dr. Morgan Nolte, welcome to the Home Healthspan podcast. Thanks, Andrew. I'm glad to be here. I am very much looking forward to hearing your story about what you're working on now and especially how that work crosses what we typically describe as pillars, but the whole point is they're interconnected. You can't separate these.
00:00:59
Speaker
um But before we do all that, how would you describe yourself? I am a lively, loving, joyful
00:01:09
Speaker
woman of God, mother,
00:01:14
Speaker
and wife. And I think that loving part is an important part of your story as well and the work that you're now doing with Zivli and everything else. So can you talk about, i think most people who know you are probably through Zili, through the YouTube channel and around insulin resistance and all that, but that's not really where you started necessarily.
00:01:36
Speaker
no I had no idea what insulin resistance was. Yeah. So i ah grow up I grew up really close to my grandparents. So eight out of nine of our grandparents were at our wedding, which was really, really cool and special.
00:01:51
Speaker
And i actually just lost my my last personal grandma. We still have one of my husbands alive, but I lost her a week before Thanksgiving. And I was so close with them and I always love talking with them and gleaning wisdom and They really informed and inspired the person that i grew up to be, you know, hardworking, faithful, loyal, loving.
00:02:17
Speaker
It's amazing. I mean, that's a that's a real privilege to know your grandparents. And I really believe that grandparents are the glue that holds a family together. And they impact multiple generations down.
Family Influence and Career in Physical Therapy
00:02:31
Speaker
So I have a new view on this as a mom of three and my grandparents, you know, my mom is healthy. My mother-in-law is healthy and our marriage would not be as strong as it is if we didn't have the support from our family for date nights, for help. You know, my husband's a farmer. And so I feel a little bit like a single parent about a third of the year during planting and harvest. And I lean a lot on that support system.
00:02:59
Speaker
My children love them. And so i just I just really have always enjoyed hanging out with like people over 50. If I hang out with someone my age, I'm like, what do you want to talk about?
00:03:11
Speaker
ah So I've always been drawn to that population because of my grandparents. And after physical therapy school, i had the opportunity to do a geriatric residency program. And it felt like a natural fit where, oh my gosh, I love this population and I want to pay it forward to my own grandparents.
00:03:29
Speaker
and help people age well so that they can have a positive influence on the next generation like my grandparents had for me. And that was really kind of my driving force. And i did the the residency program and then I became a mentor for that geriatric residency program. It was through Creighton University in Omaha for the residency. And then after a while of being a mentor, I became the program coordinator.
00:03:55
Speaker
So I worked in many different settings throughout that time as a physical therapist, but primarily I did post-acute rehab and home care where somebody went to the hospital, yeah a fall, and maybe a heart attack or a stroke, and they couldn't go home.
Challenges in Geriatric Physical Therapy
00:04:13
Speaker
They were too sick, too weak to go home. So they had to go to post-acute rehab. Had a lovely time there. Was very frustrated by insurance companies.
00:04:24
Speaker
um declining or denying care that was needed. i was very frustrated by limitations and how much therapy I could provide somebody. And so driven to for more flexibility, like so many physical therapists, I went to home care and I loved more autonomy. I loved more patient consistency.
00:04:44
Speaker
Sometimes in rehab, you're seeing like people that you haven't worked with before. And it's really hard to have a really effective session with them. And over time, i just became quite jaded in this world of geriatric PT because we had what we called repeat offenders, which means they come into rehab, then they go to home care, and they fall or they get sick or they have an adverse effect of their medications and they have to go back to the hospital and the process starts all over again.
Shift to Preventative Healthcare
00:05:15
Speaker
And their life is literally...
00:05:17
Speaker
revolving around their illness and around their doctor's appointments and around their medication schedule. And it's sad. And my heart broke many times. But I got to the point where I realized, wow, if we were spending this much time, energy and money,
00:05:35
Speaker
like these resources, both of our resources that are really valuable, 20 years ago, you would not need a geriatric physical therapist right now. You would be healthy. You would be vibrant. You would have a lot more money in your bank account to do whatever you want to do.
00:05:51
Speaker
it's really sad. And so after I had my son, my oldest is seven. we have seven-year-old boy, Dawson, five-year-old girl, Leah, and then a 10-month-old Logan. And so he's our caboose and he's so cute.
00:06:06
Speaker
And so after I had Dawson, i said, if I'm going to work, I'm going to do something I'm really passionate about and do what I believe can make the biggest difference in this world. which is preventative healthcare.
00:06:18
Speaker
I loved my time as a geriatric PT, but often it felt like it was too little too late. So i went down lots of research rabbit holes and kind of started in like preventative physical therapy, but realized you can't just have exercise tunnel vision and expect to be healthy.
00:06:37
Speaker
I can give you an eight week exercise program and chances are nine times out of 10, you're not going to do it. And that was always really confusing and frustrating to me as somebody who loved exercises. Um, like why don't people do what they know they're supposed to do?
00:06:54
Speaker
You know? And so I used to have more of an accusatory judgmental tone about things. And that's totally by the wayside. We'll get into why more later. But, um, as I started my own business, I got more into nutrition and sleep and some traditional stress management techniques and mindset work along with the exercise. And I um,
00:07:18
Speaker
having a broader scope. I loved really being able to work with people on all aspects of their lifestyle because I knew that is what could change the trajectory of the next 10, 20 years of their life and how they can impact their loved ones.
00:07:34
Speaker
But I realized I really, really like looking at h and P's. So history and physicals. And I was that PT two that would come in early and stay late and document and, you know, say hi and bye to the janitor.
00:07:47
Speaker
which was exhausting, but needless to say, I'm thorough. And so ah I noticed something and I noticed that nobody just had diabetes.
00:07:57
Speaker
Nobody just had heart disease or dementia or osteoarthritis.
Insulin Resistance and Lifestyle Strategy
00:08:02
Speaker
They all had a cluster of acronyms on their h and p like HDL, HTN, OA, DM, all of those stand for different diseases.
00:08:12
Speaker
And so as I researched disease prevention, I realized that so many of these conditions can be traced back to insulin resistance, which is something that if I had heard of it, I was probably in one ear and out the other.
00:08:24
Speaker
But when you look into insulin resistance, you realize, holy cow, This is at the core of so many of the conditions that I was treating in geriatric PT. If I want to make the difference that I believe God put me on this planet to make and help people live a healthy, vibrant, active lifestyle that they love, I'm going to kill the most birds if I focus on the insulin resistance.
00:08:50
Speaker
So let's focus on a low insulin, low inflammation lifestyle strategy. And we are going to help people. And that's true. Like if you follow the strategy that I teach, you will lower your blood sugar. You will lower your blood pressure.
00:09:07
Speaker
You will lose weight. You will gain muscle. You will have energy. Your brain fog will reduce. You're going to be reducing your risk of dementia. Your joint pain will get better.
00:09:18
Speaker
All of these outcomes I was seeing. And then i realized something. I had this encounter with this, this amazing person. Her name's Dr. Laurel Mellon, M E L L I N. She came on my podcast and, uh,
00:09:37
Speaker
It was crazy. I mean, I, her interview blew me away. She is all about stress and the biochemical effect of stress on our bodies.
Impact of Stress on Health Programs
00:09:47
Speaker
And then because I was so into insulin resistance, it clicked for me right away. And i was so into mindset, like auto suggestion and creating your future and positive thinking and all these things.
00:09:58
Speaker
So we had an interview and we didn't really talk again. But then I swear something crazy always happens when I have a baby. There's always like a big business shift whenever I have a baby. And so I was going on maternity leave.
00:10:13
Speaker
And I reached out to Dr. Mellon and I said, would you be a guest speaker for my members while I'm on maternity leave? Because I host, you know, coaching calls with my members.
00:10:24
Speaker
And she goes, I would love to. So she did. And afterwards she reached out and she goes, you need emotional brain training. Your members are stressed out.
00:10:35
Speaker
And I said, Oh, okay. Well, let me go back to what you were teaching in the podcast. Let me look into this again. She was so persistent that we needed this. And I i respected that in her and I could sense her passion in it.
00:10:50
Speaker
And I could sense the need for it because the reality is some of our members saw really great results. Other members, it took a lot longer. Other people never completed the program, which is devastating because it's so good.
00:11:07
Speaker
And when you look at the patterns, you recognize that people who came into the program at low stress completed and saw great results. or who already had good stress management tech, like, like a handle on how they process stress, right?
00:11:23
Speaker
But the people who had more moderate stress levels would take longer or, you know, get so far, but need a little bit more support. But the people with the highest stress had the highest drop off rate, they got overwhelmed.
00:11:36
Speaker
They felt like they would, like a perfectionist, like if I can't do it all, then I'm not going to do it, do anything. Right? And i thought, wow, wow, this makes a lot of sense. And I'm going to explain to you biochemically what is going on when we're stressed out and the two ways that directly contributes to insulin resistance and why i have
Emotional Brain Training and Stress Management
00:11:59
Speaker
spent...
00:11:59
Speaker
the better part of like eight months now living in emotional brain training. I mean, I've done provider training. I'm leading small groups. It is an integral part of our Ziggly method. Now we're not just doing the lifestyle medicine aspect of things anymore because that's not enough.
00:12:18
Speaker
So here is, here's the plumb line, how I started an insulin resistance and ended up in both that and now emotional brain training. I want you to think about that there are five levels of stress. Okay. So i'm going to ask you a question. Actually, can I take you through a check-in and your audience? Absolutely. This is kind of one of my favorite tools in EBT. is So simple.
00:12:43
Speaker
All right, Andrew and audience, if you will go ahead and turn your attention to your body and your breathing. We're going to do the most important thing that we can and connect to the deepest part of ourselves.
00:12:58
Speaker
Take a nice deep breath in through your nose
00:13:05
Speaker
and out through your mouth or in any way that feels really comforting and comfortable for you. And when you're ready, put your shoulders back and lift your chin.
00:13:17
Speaker
Bring a warm smile to your face. This is just your body giving your brain the message that you are in a state of well-being. And then warmly observe yourself and feel a wave of compassion for yourself.
00:13:36
Speaker
And then ask yourself, what's my number?
00:13:40
Speaker
Am i at a one? Is my stress level a one? and feeling great and I'm present with a glow. Am I at a two? Feeling good and present, but no glow.
00:13:54
Speaker
ah three A three, little stressed, so your emotions and your thoughts are scattered. A four, definitely stressed with a stuck thought or separating emotion. Or a five, totally stressed out, where you feel like you're going to snap or maybe you feel totally numb.
00:14:13
Speaker
Just take all the time you need.
00:14:17
Speaker
Last, take a moment to connect to the safe place within your sanctuary.
00:14:25
Speaker
And appreciate your unending capacity for love, compassion, and ultimately joy.
00:14:36
Speaker
Wonderful.
00:14:39
Speaker
We've connected to ourselves so that we can better connect with each other. So Andrew, what was your brain state? I'd say I'm at a two right now. I think there've been points today where I've been a three edging into a four, but, uh, you know, yesterday was my, my daughter's 10th birthday. So got to celebrate that with her, which was a lot of fun. I did school, uh, lunch duty at her school today. So that always gets you very present and and everything. The one thing I'm going into trial and custody around her next week on Monday. So that's looming. And so I think that's pulling me further from the one than I think I would otherwise be, but,
00:15:16
Speaker
I feel pretty good being at a two given what's going on. ah Given that, absolutely. So I want you to understand that at brain states one and two your thinking brain is in charge. Okay. Your prefrontal cortex, that's kind of like the good parent part of our brain.
00:15:33
Speaker
And when you're at brain states one and two, you have homeostatic brain circuits that are activated that actually produce a chemical response of more dopamine more serotonin and more oxytocin.
00:15:48
Speaker
And those are the chemicals that make you feel happy and good and calm and connected. So when our stress is low, that is why we feel good.
00:16:00
Speaker
Chemically, biochemically, we are a different person at brain states one and two when our prefrontal cortex is in control. Now also this is a thinking brain, right? So any of these great strategies that we teach related to nutrition, exercise, you know, do your meditation, go to bed on time, all of that knowing lives in the thinking brain.
00:16:26
Speaker
That's why people always say, I know what to do, but I can't do it because their emotional brain is running the show. So if you're at brain states three, four or five, especially on a chronic basis, you know, like you, you know, you might dip down, but have ways to come back up.
00:16:42
Speaker
But if you're chronically at brain state three, four or five, which were a little stressed, definitely stressed or stressed out, you have something called allostatic circuits going on.
00:16:52
Speaker
And those are disease causing stress circuits that are stored in the emotional brain. So there's different parts like the limbic system and the amygdala is a big part of the the stress response.
00:17:06
Speaker
And when those circuits are firing, there are eight weight regulating chemicals that are dysregulated. So your insulin goes up, your cortisol goes up.
00:17:20
Speaker
Chemically, biochemically, this is what's happening. Your GLP-1, which is you know very popular right now with medications, goes down. And your ability to burn fat goes down. Your ability to store fat goes up.
00:17:35
Speaker
So again, eight chemicals, GLP one is just one of them. So that's why, you know, taking a medication might be desirable for some people, but you cannot circumvent the required thought and lifestyle changes that are needed to lose weight, get healthy and keep it off.
00:17:53
Speaker
I wonder if it's even more pernicious because there's a separate psychological side of if you have that running and you're at a three, four or five, then your cognitive load is constantly higher as well. So it makes it that much more difficult when you say, I know the right thing, but I can't do it. You're kind of exhausted. You've you've used everything up. And so then you see it, people are constantly worried about money.
00:18:18
Speaker
they can't, they're not making as good at decisions. And maybe this is what you were alluding to before of, used to be more judgmental, but now I'm not, that's kind of gone out the window because now I understand there's There's actually a different reason why I'm not going okay or yeah not just not being stressed out, but you're right.
00:18:36
Speaker
um Being in stress makes us judgmental. Yes, for sure. Oh, sorry. I was saying um you were less judgmental of the people making poor decisions now understanding this maybe because if you're stressed, you're making poor decisions and then that's compounded.
00:18:51
Speaker
You're paying more for your poor decisions because of these eight chemicals that your body's either not releasing or releasing too much of. Yeah. So there's really a primary and a secondary effect. So the primary effect is the direct biochemical response of stress, of stress circuits. So these are circuits in your brain going off, um kind of like a light switch going off and on You know, a circuit comes on.
00:19:17
Speaker
If you're stressed out, it's going to give you disease-promoting chemicals directly. So it's very known that when you're stressed out, your blood sugar will be higher.
00:19:28
Speaker
Why is that? It's not like your brain is releasing blood sugar. No, your, your brain is releasing cortisol, which raises your blood sugar, but the secondary effect. And this is really what gave me a lot more compassion for people is that any behavior ah is the tail end of a brain circuit.
00:19:47
Speaker
So I'm waving at the camera right now. That is my brain going down my nervous system, telling my hand to go up and wave. Same thing goes when you're reaching for the sugar after dinner, when you're snacking at night, when you're going for seconds, even though you're already full, when you said you were going to get up in the morning and you didn't get up all of these things that make us seek instant gratification from an external solution. So let's focus on food right now are all symptoms of circuits,
00:20:19
Speaker
brain circuits, stress circuits. These are formed often the ones, especially that drive overeating and sugar issues, um, during times of trauma or stress overload as a child and adolescent or adult where you had an, a stress ah stressful event, which tanks your dopamine stress tanks your dopamine. So you don't feel good.
00:20:44
Speaker
And food is one of one of the easiest ways to raise your dopamine, especially sugar. So when you eat sugar, your dopamine goes up. It's an external solution. for an internal problem.
00:20:56
Speaker
The internal problem is you're stressed. Your dopamine is down. There's many external solutions. There's food, there's gambling, there's excess alcohol intake, excess TV, excess social media, all sorts of excesses, right? That can raise our... There's exercise, right? like one Yeah. Yeah.
00:21:18
Speaker
Over-exercising, yeah. And when we talk about circuits like this, you have to recognize people that are super jacked on social media with like 5% body fat, they have circuits too.
00:21:29
Speaker
We all have circuits that drive us to behave a certain way. And once you realize that the circuits you have you didn't choose, especially the ones that are driving you towards self-sabotaging behaviors.
00:21:43
Speaker
That's an incredible insight because you can realize that, oh my gosh, I crave sugar after dinner and it's not my fault. It's not that I lack discipline. It's not that I lack self-control.
00:21:57
Speaker
It's just a circuit that formed without my permission. And now it fires without my permission. So does that make sense, Andrew, everything that I just covered so far?
00:22:09
Speaker
Absolutely. And maybe this is where we're going next, but saying it's not your fault is very different than saying it's not your responsibility. So understanding, hey, I'm not accepting blame for how I ended up here, but guess what? No one's getting me out of the ditch other than me. So there there has to be a responsibility next step, I assume.
00:22:27
Speaker
Of course. And the problem is that most people are trying to solve an emotional brain problem with thinking brain strategies.
Rewiring Stress Circuits for Behavior Change
00:22:36
Speaker
Counseling. How are you feeling? Well, what are you doing? You're psychoanalyzing yourself.
00:22:43
Speaker
You're thinking about how you're feeling. We're not getting into the emotional brain, cognitive behavioral therapy. So literally, i love the book, Atomic Habits by James Clear, but that is all thinking brain strategies.
00:22:57
Speaker
And that is why it's so much easier to be consistent and do what we know how to do when we're at brain state one and two. The issue is until emotional brain training, there was not a simple, repeatable, effective method to get your brain state up, to rewire these stress circuits. So actually find whatever circuit is driving your behavior And they've kind of codified the the natural stress stress resilient pathways in your brain to move you through stress to joy.
00:23:27
Speaker
i know it sounds crazy a little bit. It sounds a little bit too like too good to be true. But the the result when you rewire a food circuit is that you have spontaneous effortless behavior change.
00:23:40
Speaker
So you put effort towards rewiring the brain circuit. That's going to raise your brain set point, create more dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, so that you feel better without the external solution.
00:23:54
Speaker
And it takes time. You know, often people will be in emotional brain training for maybe even a year. Sometimes if they have a history of trauma, two years, but the good thing is just like you experienced during that check-in, it feels good.
00:24:08
Speaker
this is This is a very safe, effective, predictably positive result. There's 14 studies behind emotional brain training. it's It's the only proven method that shows sustainable weight loss, except for weight loss surgery.
00:24:23
Speaker
So if you look at studies of like GLP-1 medications, you're going to lose weight while you're on it. And then you're going to re regain it when you're off of it. lifestyle changes will work if you can manage your stress.
00:24:35
Speaker
And that's the key. So I really think that this was the missing piece, at least for, for my patient population, who mostly adults over 50, they've tried Weight Watchers, they've tried Genie Crate, they've tried keto, they've tried everything.
00:24:49
Speaker
And nothing works long-term because they have circuits in their brain that make them go to sugar or food or overeating for love or comfort or safety or survival.
00:25:03
Speaker
And they haven't had the tools to take responsibility to rewire their brain. Like one of my favorite quotes from Dr. Mellon is trying to change your behavior without the tools to lower your stress is So you can change your behavior is called suffering.
00:25:21
Speaker
And I think there's a lot of people who are suffering right now because they really do care. They want to stop eating sugar. They want to stop eating at night. They want the sugar to not control them.
00:25:34
Speaker
You know, they're so frustrated and they feel like a failure. And it's like, these are just circuits. And thanks to EBT, emotional brain training, we have very simple tools to rewire the circuits so that you can get back up into brain state one and two, where you have all of those resources and feel good chemicals and thinking brain strategies.
00:25:55
Speaker
So you can just brush your teeth after dinner instead of go have another, you know, piece of Halloween candy from eight months ago or whatever it is. So that's kind of what we do. That's how we kind of came full picture on, okay, yes, the lifestyle changes are needed, but what is the most effective way to manage your stress so that you can change your behavior by changing the circuit?
Mindset's Role in Health Pillars
00:26:16
Speaker
Because when you change the circuit, you're going to change your biochemistry.
00:26:20
Speaker
When you change your biochemistry, you're going to change your behavior. think it's Tim Ferriss often kind of asked that, what is the one thing that if I do or change, it makes everything else easier?
00:26:30
Speaker
And we talk a lot Alively on the five pillars, our movement, and we our nutrition, how we sleep and recover, stress and mindset, and then social connection. And I really did come into it thinking mindset is that foundational piece, because without the mindset, whether you're stressed or you're procrastinating, you're not going to get the right sleep.
00:26:51
Speaker
without the right mindset, even if you know, i need to go move my body, you don't get up and do it. You don't make the right food choices. Maybe you're too insular and you don't go interact with your community and and other people. And so you really need this.
00:27:04
Speaker
And what... I've learned today more. it's not just that it unlocks to be able to make better decisions in those other pieces, but because of the chemicals being released in one and two versus three, four, and five, you're actually stacking the deck either more in your favor or more against yourself, depending on the state you're in.
00:27:24
Speaker
So you said it can take up to a year, maybe more doing this EBT process. What are the steps? So I know we did one exercise. What does that look like over the course of a year?
00:27:36
Speaker
Yeah. so the first step is there's, it's a three-step process is how I like to describe it. And the first is self-regulation. So you learn the five brain states, you learn how to identify where you're at, and there's one tool for each brain state. So if you're feeling great, there's a tool for that. There's a tool to deepen that. If you're feeling good, there's a tool for that. And we call it spiraling up into joy. So you're going to process those emotions, get down into the the emotional brain. We always end up in the thinking brain.
00:28:05
Speaker
So one for each brain state, one, two, three, four, five. And you recognize where you're at and you recognize what tool you need to use. And you become proficient at using that tool to shift off the stress response in minutes.
00:28:18
Speaker
I kid you not. I've had people who come in at a brain state like four or five and they've been there for days. And then 15 minutes later, after using one of the tools together, they're up to a three or a two.
00:28:29
Speaker
It really works. And they're like, oh my gosh, I've been perseverating about that for days. And I'm like, yeah, you just... Sometimes you just got to feel your feelings, you know, like your emotional brain is very wise. Is it a singular tool for each of the states or is it? Okay. Can you give an example of one?
00:28:45
Speaker
Right. So there's, um, just to name them like brain state one is the compassion tool. Brain state two is the feelings tool. Three is the flow tool. Four is the cycle tool. Five is the damage control tool.
00:28:58
Speaker
So ah there's different tools for each state, but they're all very simple and easy to use. And that's actually what Dr. Mellon and I are collaborating on right now is like a three to four week learning experience that teaches not just your thinking brain, because right now everybody's thinking brain is online. They're thinking about EBT, but you have to experience it emotionally to train your emotional brain too. Okay. We have to use emotional brain strategies if we want to change the emotional brain. And that's what we do. So let me go over the big picture and then I'll, then we'll use a tool together.
00:29:32
Speaker
So that's self regulatory skills, know your brain state, know the tools become proficient. The second is rewiring. So we start with four major circuits, your food circuit,
00:29:44
Speaker
Your mood circuit, which is like, what mood do you get stuck in love circuits? So it could be merging where you become overly attuned to somebody else's needs at the expense of your own wants, desires, needs, or maybe their wants to, but you're, you're merging with somebody.
00:30:02
Speaker
And then distancing. So often you get tired merging then you're like, i can't take this anymore. I just have to go. i have to leave. And then the other one is the body circuit. So food, mood, love, body.
00:30:17
Speaker
For body circuits, some people have a body judgment circuit where they're constantly overly critical of themselves. Some people, especially if they have some long standing weight issues, have a body protection circuit where their emotional brain holds on to extra weight because it's protecting them somehow emotionally.
00:30:37
Speaker
It is rewarding for their brain to hold on to the weight because they need the protection. Yeah. Example of that. I don't know if you or a lot of listeners have read The Body Keeps the Score. I've heard that one. Yeah. Yeah. A lot of women who were sexually assaulted or abused end up doing that. It's a defensive mechanism. If I'm not sexually appealing, then this won't happen to me again. Exactly.
00:30:59
Speaker
Exactly. That's exactly right. So with rewiring, those are typically the ones that we focus on. But sometimes what comes first is a circuit preventing them from doing the work. So a perfectionism circuit or a procrastination circuit or a suppressing emotions circuit.
00:31:16
Speaker
So we always work on whatever's preventing you from doing the work because the process is the solution. But that's kind of rewiring when we're just focusing on the skill of getting to the wire and rewiring it. So it's a very specific pathway that your brain has. Your brain wants you to be enjoyed because that's where you have optimal biochemistry. They've just really through, it was developed over 40 years. I mean, this method has been in the works for a long time. And I think it will become more mainstream. I hope it does because it's wildly effective.
00:31:50
Speaker
I rewired those main circuits in like four months, but I was very focused and intense. An example of my circuits were get my comfort from eating carbs and sweets to the point that I sabotage my health.
00:32:03
Speaker
I get my... Pleasure. Pleasure was a big one for me. I get my pleasure from feeling full. I'm like, why do I keep overeating a little bit every night? well That's where I'm getting my pleasure from. So I had to find more natural ways for pleasure that weren't food and incorporate more of those into my life and just rewire the circuit.
00:32:23
Speaker
For me, it really changed my mood and my love. So how I mother and how I'm in relationship with my spouse, because my mood circuit was I get my power from being angry to the point that I scare my children and encode the same damaging wire in them.
00:32:39
Speaker
because I would stress out and I would snap and I would yell at them. Didn't happen often, but when it did, it was ugly. And I felt terrible and I hated it. And so you rewire that to like, you know, you can't do that obviously. And you find new words to a better circuit for love. Um, I was overly merged with my husband.
00:32:58
Speaker
Very, very common for women to be merged with their mom and then they merge with their husband. And so um during stressful seasons, like harvest, I would have to distance. I would be like, I can't take this anymore. I have to get out of here. I need to like go on a little self-care vacation, you know? So, so now having rewired those circuits, I feel a lot more peace and power inside. I feel more authentic,
00:33:22
Speaker
I feel more free. i feel like I'm higher in integrity and vibrancy. And it's not like I would have told you I had great health before. Like I taught it, you know? So, so I'm like, I, even before UBT, I felt like I had really great health, but this really just took my results to the next level. So that's the second phase is rewiring. And then third is called advanced DBT.
00:33:43
Speaker
And there are seven higher purpose rewards. I want you and your listeners to listen to these and tell me which one is most rewarding for you. And then there's like a 30 day kit of reading to clear any emotional clutter around these rewards and strengthen these joy circuits. So we call these joy circuits. So sanctuary, peace and power from within.
00:34:05
Speaker
Authenticity, feeling whole and being genuine. Vibrancy, healthy with a zest for a life. Integrity for doing the right thing.
00:34:16
Speaker
Intimacy, forgiving and receiving love. Spirituality, however you define that. And then freedom, a life of joy and purpose. So which of those seven rewards is most motivating for you, Andrew?
00:34:30
Speaker
I mean, they're all pretty appealing. Was one vibrancy? What was the, yeah, I think the zest for life, the vibrancy, if I had to put one above the other, but each one I hear, I like, there's one, there's one. I know, right? So they're all good. So there's about a month long kit for each of those to strengthen those wires. And at the end, the goal is to become wired for one, wired at one or wired for joy, whatever language you prefer, because that is your optimal state of biochemistry.
Advanced Techniques in Emotional Brain Training
00:34:59
Speaker
you have an abundance of all seven of those rewards and healthy behaviors become desirable. Like they're just kind of who you are at an identity level. So it's a really, really effective mechanism and method. And that's the overview.
00:35:14
Speaker
and then our lifestyle medicine course, fits really nicely in there because once you, you know, have the self-regulatory skills to tolerate the stress and and accept the essential pains of behavior change, you're so much more likely to succeed.
00:35:30
Speaker
And if people still struggle, then that's fine. That just means there's a wire there and you work on rewiring it. And then the behaviors change effortlessly. So it's a really beautiful system. I'm really grateful that I found it. And, you know, speaking of using one of the tools, so we have a custody battle coming up next week, right? Okay. Okay.
00:35:51
Speaker
So there's two tools that I think would be really helpful. I know, i think we're good on time. Are we still good on time? yeah Yeah, let's take the time we need. I really like using the Brain State 5 tool followed by the Brain State 1 tool. You don't have to be at a certain brain state to get benefit from the tool, okay?
00:36:09
Speaker
So you can also use these tools proactively or retroactively. So after, if I had a snap at my kids or a snap at my husband, I would go back mentally and use this tool because your emotional brain can't tell time.
00:36:26
Speaker
So if you go back, you put yourself in the situation, you use this tool of how would I react differently next time? You're going to be more likely to react differently next time, especially after you've rewired the circuits.
00:36:37
Speaker
So I'm anticipating that's going to be a little bit of a stressful, like, can you think of a stressful time coming up or in the past recently where you don't know what's going to happen? Or maybe you've snapped at your ex-wife or, you know, what's a stressful thing that you can think about is what I would say to bring up. If you want to share it, you can, if you don't, you don't have to.
00:37:00
Speaker
Yeah. I mean, all, all the hearings within this. So, so I wear a whoop, right. And you measure stress at times. And so normally it's when I'm lifting heavy at the gym, it's very, very high stress.
00:37:10
Speaker
And I remember being at one of the hearings and looking at my reading after, and that entire two and a half hours, it was just like I was doing a CrossFit class for three hours. Right. It was, it was really, really stressful.
00:37:22
Speaker
he So in that moment of just, you're so stressed out. I also forgot something really important. Self-regulation also includes joy points, which are even easier ways to access joy.
00:37:39
Speaker
so we're going to cover those next really briefly, but let's stick with the the tools. So the, um, the brain state five, the damage control tool, I just want you to put yourself in that court situation.
00:37:52
Speaker
And repeat to yourself, do not judge. Minimize harm. Know this will pass. And if you feel like expanding upon that mentally, you can say, like do not judge myself for how stressed out I am right now. Do not judge my ex-wife or whatever she's doing. Minimize harm.
00:38:18
Speaker
Take deep breaths.
00:38:22
Speaker
Try to have peaceful interactions with people, minimize harm. Know this will pass. These hearings will pass. This hour will pass. This minute will pass.
00:38:33
Speaker
I will not be at brain state five forever. And then you're going to give yourself self-compassion. So while considering everything that's going on right now, so that's kind of the first lead-in, we call these lead-ins, considering that,
00:38:50
Speaker
I'm stuck in court right now about custody of my daughter and i got divorced and my living situation is all over the place. And whatever is stressing you out, considering all that, the next lead in is it's a reasonable expectation that I would Be overwhelmed, be stressed out, be at a brain state five, be really angry, be worried, be afraid, whatever the emotion is, you're going to validate the emotion and then say, so I'm going to take really good care of myself and
00:39:24
Speaker
And then you're going to decide what is the next logical best thing that you can do to take care of yourself. It might be go for a walk at the next break. Or if you have the spiral up app for EBT, like spiral up about this. so can can I share one thing that's kind of haven't gone through it for months and that has helped was yesterday morning i was I was praying for my ex-wife and her attorney and right like trying to give...
00:39:50
Speaker
the love and joy to them, right. Is a, and it it just felt different to kind of divorce. It's not frightening. Like hey assume they're trying to do whatever they're trying to do. they Yeah.
00:40:03
Speaker
So that, that can be a love burst joy point or a transcendence joy point. We can cover those later, but if, if we're back in this situation of like, okay, I'm going to take really good care of myself and maybe it's send a love burst to them. Maybe it's, um,
00:40:20
Speaker
go for a workout after this, what literally whatever. And then we always end in the thinking brain. So I expect this is the next lead. And this is called the take action tool. I expect myself to do the best I can to make it through this hearing, take deep breaths, whatever.
00:40:37
Speaker
My positive, powerful thought is, I can do that. Or I have the power to do that. Or this matters to me, or I need to do this. The essential pain is,
00:40:48
Speaker
There's seven essential pains. I'm not going to go over all of them, but some of them are like, I'm alone. like I'm alone in this, or I'm not perfect, or I'm not in complete control, or this takes work.
00:41:01
Speaker
I have to give, i have to receive. Those are some of them. And then, but my earned reward for accepting the essential pain and following through on my positive, you know, action that I decided upon is, and then you choose one of those seven rewards.
00:41:17
Speaker
So it's a pretty simple pathway. They're very easy to memorize over time as you use the skills and your brain needs that. Your emotional brain is like the inner child. So it needs simplicity and um that really just works really well. So then I would follow it by the brain state one tool, which is all about compassion.
00:41:38
Speaker
So it's just three simple lead-ins, feel compassion for myself, And then you're just going to pause and feel compassion for yourself. Feel compassion for others. So you maybe pick your wife or your daughter or their attorney.
00:41:54
Speaker
Feel compassion for others. This is really hard for everybody. Feel compassion for all living beings. Or you can choose a subset of people, whatever works for you. And then the take action tool. I expect myself to do the best I can to my positive, powerful thought is.
00:42:09
Speaker
The essential pain is my earned reward is, and then, you know, feel the surge of joy. So that's how we shift off. Like we can turn off the stress response and simultaneously at the same time, increase your joy and your dopamine and your serotonin. And so that's when we're talking self-regulation, those are just two of the five skills.
Increasing Joy and Self-Compassion
00:42:28
Speaker
And joy points are the other thing. I love joy points. I won't go over all of them, but we talked about um like the transcendence where you're like releasing control, asking for help from whatever you believe in um The love burst is just like feeling the love and then sending that out to somebody. oh I love the nurturing inner voice. I think there's, this one's really underappreciated, but if you're having a really hard time with something, speak to yourself really kindly. Like,
00:42:58
Speaker
I think especially, I don't know about you, but like, I feel hard on myself sometimes, like as a mom or as a wife, I think women tend to have some critical inner voice stuff going on. So, um, you know, if I'm snapping at my kids, like Morgan, wow. Give yourself a break. You are trying really hard.
00:43:17
Speaker
You're trying really hard and you're doing a really good job. Your kids are so great. I know this is hard. i know that you're lonely right now. It's harvest. This isn't going to last forever.
00:43:30
Speaker
You're doing so good. I see you. I love you. You do not have to be perfect to be wonderful. so you're just like really nurturing that inner voice anyways i teach the other joy points in this experience that we're working on right now so i don't know what time this is going to be going live but they can check out my website zivli.com and that's where they can find this experience to learn you know the brain states and the five tools and the joy points to improve their self-regulation lower their stress so they can change their behavior Well, I have a question on that nurturing voice piece, whether it's with friends or your partner, the ability or role to to be that voice for them, right? Because you can see a loved one, to a child or a partner saying some of that stuff out loud and it just hurts. Like I i would never want someone else to talk to you that way. And then hearing that and and being able to bring them back, right?
00:44:27
Speaker
Does that help or it has to come within? or can that help start steering it to come within? So you have to recognize that when when you say like, oh, that person has a vibe about them. Like we are biochemical and we are electrical beings. My brain state impacts your brain state and vice versa.
00:44:45
Speaker
Parents, I mean, this is really about helping you reparent yourself. And so your child will co-regulate with you. And so if you can use a really nurturing voice with them when needed, they're going to learn how to use that with themselves. So it's very important if somebody else, you're going to start to recognize like, oh, they're at a low brain state. What tool could they use? How can I support them? How can I stay at one and help bring them up? I use this in parenting all the time. Like with my kids, we'll talk about joy points and cycles and, um,
00:45:17
Speaker
You know, my son resisted a little bit more than my daughter. um He likes to take action tool, but he doesn't really like the feeling. you're feeling ah My daughter accepts it a little bit more, you know, so it's very, it's really beneficial. Like if you're at a positive brain state of brain state one, that's going to come across and that's going to,
00:45:38
Speaker
electrically change somebody else around you. So that's another reason why coaching can be really beneficial. And honestly, sometimes is needed in emotional brain training, because your coach acts as like a co regulator as you go down and find the words of your wire, like in the deep recesses part, like of your brain, and kind of coaches you back up into joy, because it's It's work, you know, but it's worth it. And Dr. Mellon says it takes what it takes and it takes as long as it takes and it's always worth it.
00:46:09
Speaker
Dr. Nolte, I can clearly see and feel all the passion, all the joy, all the knowledge that has gone into this journey of what you're now doing and how you're giving back.
00:46:24
Speaker
For those, you reference zivli.com, where people can find you. You have a YouTube channel that has fantastic content. You have your own podcast. where Where can people find you? And we'll make sure to include it all in the show notes.
00:46:37
Speaker
I think the website's the best place. I've taken a little bit of a break from producing new content just because I've been so busy in learning EBT, but I will. Once i kind of ah once i get this product done, I will happily get back to producing YouTube content. It's just Dr. Morgan Nolte on YouTube. You can search that. And then my podcast is Reshape Your Health with Dr. Morgan Nolte.
00:47:00
Speaker
Fantastic. Thank you for today. And again, for all the work, i I am excited to dig in on EBT and do these tools. They they seem incredible. Thank you for joining us on today's episode of the Home of Healthspan podcast.
00:47:13
Speaker
And remember, you can always find the products, practices and routines mentioned by today's guests, as well as many other healthspan role models on Alively.com. Enjoy a lively day.