Transcript
Speaker: hello everyone Welcome back to another episode. of the Certified Jarvis Podcast. Today. We got a familiar face. Alyssa is back.
Speaker: Also... We. For anyone that... missed us. um last night we We're on talking shit. We're on the segment Florida or not Florida. I felt kind of bad because I flashed my ass. um it wasn't meant to be that way i had worn uh Talking shit.
Speaker: Shirt that was. for the troops. Well, when I showed tried to show the back portion of the shirt. Everyone got to see. you know, a full moon in Minnesota.
Speaker: Ciao. Um, but Alyssa! Now that you're back. What are we talking about tonight? We are talking about...
Speaker: Movies. And... or. Classic movies. and whether or not they would work today. or at least with today's audiences.
Speaker: Um. And yes. I'm back. Um. I was beginning to think you were enjoying. um doing this by yourself a little too much so i couldn't have let you have all the fun to continue No.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: um So with that being said. ah we'll We'll start out with American Pie right away.
Speaker: Do you think? that American Pie. would work with today's audiences. Yes, no, or maybe with some changes. No.
Speaker: Um, And I'll say why, because... Honestly. a lot of people in the 90s We were a different breed. You know um you had the kids in the 80s that were now becoming teenagers.
Speaker: if not already. Um... And. you had what I feel is The last true. decade of that raunchy teen comedies.
Speaker: that we had not seen for a while. I mean... um You had Animal House. national and poons animal house which It's another movie we will talk about. Later in the show.
Speaker: Um, You had that. You had... meatballs, you had Caddyshack. You had the John Hughes. um Breakfast Club, Pretty in Pink.
Speaker: um Weird science. What other ones were there? Breakfast Club, Pretty in Pink. 16 candles. um you had home alone you had a lot of those comedies well by the late 90s It was another reinvention of what we were going to do. And in comes the raunchy teen comedy, the comedy of.
Speaker: Well, you know. We need to. Um. We need to take what John Hughes did with the whole high school.
Speaker: um comedy and kind of flip it into the next era And. have it be about a bunch of teens that Make a pact of, hey, you know.
Speaker: At prom, let's lose our virginities. And it harpened back to a movie that, again, we will talk later on. um Porkies. where you know it was That overly sexualized.
Speaker: Comedy. And...
Speaker: I do not think. you would have Four guys. sitting in another person's bedroom watching a woman strip down and watching her masturbate. it in today's society without people calling them perverts.
Speaker: I think American Pie would not work today. And I would have to agree with you on that. I think In order for American Pie to...
Speaker: be able to work in today's society I think it would have to be stripped of everything that Makes the movie. Funny.
Speaker: And it would. basically strip away the identity of that movie. um
Speaker: Just because we we... We live in a world that's all about... um all all about consent and all about um
Speaker: Well. People's. Um.
Speaker: people's The words are escaping me. Whoa. we've We've always lived in a world of consent. Let's let's be first and foremost. But.
Speaker: I think we live in a world that. Is now. It's heightened. if that makes sense Yeah, it does. i mean It does.
Speaker: And I mean... To piggyback off that. The reason why I don't think American Pie works today. is People in today's. Let's... Call it what it is. political landscape.
Speaker: Would literally. boycott this movie. Because. they would see horny teenagers As.
Speaker: The decline. of morality kind of like what they did back when you know in the 70s with rock and roll and all that they thought oh it was going to drive the kids to join colts and all that shit In today's standard.
Speaker: I think it would be the same way. You know, it would be people Losing their mind. And. condemning it.
Speaker: Um... And it it just I in my opinion, I know a lot of people will come at us for saying this, but I it would not be a good idea to make.
Speaker: American Pie. in today's society. Society as we know it today is so woke and stupid. That. people would have a problem with it even if they played by it.
Speaker: society's rules or whatever you want to fucking call it. Right. So kind kind of a fun question on this one. What is the first scene that...
Speaker: You would tell the studio. Yeah, we're going to have to change that. Um... Jim fucking the pie.
Speaker: Yeah. And I think like the... i Yeah. I think the Nadia scene would have to be. Chopped.
Speaker: Um. Because. Again. you're Morally. new feminists would would shoot it down in a heartbeat they would they would say how dare someone do that um And...
Speaker: It just wouldn't be a good scene. All right. I agree. Um, so Let's move on to the next movie. Okay. Ace Ventura Pet. detective.
Speaker: No.
Speaker: Hmm. And I'll tell you why. The scene where. He and Dan Marino find out that. Einhorn is Ray Finkel.
Speaker: and when he says That's why Roger Protector was killed, because he found Captain Winky. Right there. It would be. People would riot.
Speaker: In today's society. And it's already been talked about. About that on other podcasts. About why it's. And to me it's. it's Like people, come on.
Speaker: You know, it's a fucking movie. You know, we we in today's society, and I know people are going to call this a rant, but in today's society, we need to get over this bullshit. you know Oh.
Speaker: Who cares? You know, yes, they made ah A guy. who transitioned into a girl. in the movie the main villain and they made a joke about Not getting up. part cut off like Get over it.
Speaker: yeah You know, it's... it Again, raunchy comedy. It was very good in the 90s.
Speaker: See and... This is one that I'm going to slightly disagree with you on. I think... It could possibly still work.
Speaker: But. There would have to be some changes to the movie. And you'd kill the movie. Eliminating that. joke. Um.
Speaker: Which, yes, it does. it does It would have the potential of doing that, but I think Jim Carrey...
Speaker: Is such a mastermind that I think he would have been able to... Adlib, something else. in its place. if that makes sense Well, I agree, but...
Speaker: You know, and another part would be him him. You know finding out about Einhorn being Finkel. And he's sitting there burning his clothes like people in today's woke society would be like, oh, well, what? He didn't want to kiss a trans person or, oh, he didn't. He he thought kissing a trans person was disgusting. Like.
Speaker: And that's why I say it would kill the movie. Because you have people out there that can't fucking... comprehend common sense and see themselves as fucking human beings.
Speaker: That's all we are in today. and In this great scope of life. We're human beings, no matter if we're male, female. Trans. Bye. Whatever. We are all human fucking beings.
Speaker: And that's why I have no hope for the society or any of these classic movies. because... You couldn't tell jokes like that in today's society. That's why comedians are always getting you know shit on. cancelled.
Speaker: because they're doing comedy that today's generation of basement dwellers can't handle. Let me ask you this.
Speaker: Do you think the seven words you can't say on TV by George Carlin? Which got him arrested. When he did it the skit back in the i think 70s do you think that would fly today
Speaker: Probably not. There you go. And that's why. Ace Ventura Pet Detective would not fly today. Because people today are so.
Speaker: And I don't want to get political when I say this, but they are two.
Speaker: Fuck. when it comes to shit like that, because that's what they fixate on. Right. It comes down. But like... and And this is a different topic on it.
Speaker: Remember when Halloween Kills came out. And the people bitched about firefighters being killed. They bitched about Michael killing gay people.
Speaker: But yet, as I've always said. you take the you You take that out of there. And then it would become, well, why can't he kill it? Why can't you go do that?
Speaker: So it's that double -edged sword of... while Michael killed gay people. But if they take that out, then it would then it would have been different. It would have been another reason to bitch about it.
Speaker: um So. But going back to... Pet detective. uh question to Bring us back out of the weeds a little bit. Could somebody Other than Jim Carrey.
Speaker: Make. the character that he plays.
Speaker: I think Dana Carvey could have done a good job. I don't think he would have done it as. Good. But I think he would have. It would have been. Okay.
Speaker: um His comedy, Dana Carvey's comedy kind of lines up with what Jim Carrey was doing.
Speaker: And. The reason I say that, look at Wayne's World. Him as Garth.
Speaker: See, and i I really don't think anybody... could have done. better than jim carrey i think jim carrey was absolutely the best choice for him especially Like...
Speaker: The one scene that lives rent -free in my brain.
Speaker: Is. When he is. um I hope I'm not confusing movies here because I've seen so many. but Is when he is driving. The, um...
Speaker: The safari truck. but No, that's when nature calls. Okay.
Speaker: Again, another really...
Speaker: Great movie. Bye. Um. Jim Carrey movie. My favorite scene in the first Ace Ventura movie is when he's... Standing behind the ah plate glass. a door shutting it while he's screaming.
Speaker: And... proving them wrong that the next door neighbor could hear him. hear Roger Bedakker being killed. Like that's the best part. Only one thing. ah ah And then him calling them all losers because he figured it out.
Speaker: The demons have been... Exorcist. My face is now clean. LuLu! Peace. movie.
Speaker: Blazing Saddles. Oh. No. Dead now. yeah Like hell no, I know. and Again. For the same reason I've stayed before. People would lose their fucking mind. But yet, if you really.
Speaker: so I'm going to tell people that would lose their mind about this. Mel Brooks was Jewish. He was told. You will not make Blazing Saddles.
Speaker: It will end your career. He didn't make it to be racist. He made it to shit on the people That. made all these different tropes. racist tropes in movies.
Speaker: He was literally... Telling Hollywood. That you know what? Okay, you don't want me to make this movie? But I'm gonna make this fucking movie. and i'm going to show you How you is Hollywood? perceive these characters.
Speaker: And that's why and I've seen this on another podcast, which we won't name because. The person that runs it's a fucking idiot anyway. They don't understand why Mel Brooks had to make Blazing Sevens. It was because he was shitting on the way Hollywood was looking at black stars. at jewish actors Like.
Speaker: You got to realize. They always tell Mal Brooks. That if you go outside this. Safe space. or a square, circle, whatever the fuck you want to call it.
Speaker: you will lose your career. Mel Brooks never played it safe in a movie. Look at Spaceballs!
Speaker: Not many people were looking at parodying. Star Wars. And yet he got George Lucas. To say yes Please parody this movie. And he did.
Speaker: Again. Hollywood told them not to. Silent movie! People told them, you're not going to be able to make a silent movie in today's sound days.
Speaker: and make people want to come see it. People came and seen it! Blazing Saddles. People went and seen it. Because, again... Society back then. was not all oh we have hurt feelings about every little fucking thing No. They went to see a movie that literally shit on racism.
Speaker: That said, you know what? This is what your Hollywood thinks. a black black actor should be. This is what Hollywood thinks about a Jewish director. They didn't want it
Speaker: And when Mel Brooks gave it to him. They couldn't get enough of it.
Speaker: Yeah, um so i I would have to agree that. I don't think blazing sal saddles would would work in today's climate. um either just because it is
Speaker: So much packed in. And it's like. Every five seconds. some jokes being made that someone would Definitely take. Wrong. Yeah. Ah.
Speaker: So with that being said... Do you think that... the movie could be remade.
Speaker: Oh, wow. defeating the purpose of the original. No. They'd tone it. They would tone it down so hard. And they would they would get a writer in there.
Speaker: That would make it so fucking woke garbage bullshit in there. that you'd literally spit on the graves of cleavon little who played Sheriff Bart, who is no longer with us.
Speaker: and you'd spit on the grave of um Oh, what the fuck is his name? The character's name is Mongo in the movie. Um...
Speaker: um Karis. Alex Karis. He used to play for the Detroit Lions back in the day. And you'd be shitting on Gene Wilder.
Speaker: You'd be shitting on Madeline Kahn. You'd be shitting on a bunch of actors that aren't here anymore. And...
Speaker: It. And I think it would be very much subpar. Oh, 100%. It would bomb the first night because you'd get people to come in because you're naming it Blazing Saddles.
Speaker: And then... once they've seen what kind of slop fest you've made it.
Speaker: it'd be they'd all walk out. And i don't I don't give a fuck about what modern society would say about it. They could shit on me for what I say, but honestly. Look look in the fucking mirror.
Speaker: Comedy today has changed so much. And the only ones that aren't afraid to continue to do the comedy. are the ones that Like Adam Sandler.
Speaker: Because Adam Sandler doesn't fucking care.
Speaker: And Mel Brooks. Look at how long it's taken him. to make Spaceballs 2. I mean, the guy's a hundred fucking, I think he's a hundred years old now.
Speaker: And he just completed Spaceballs 2. Yep. So moving moving on to our next movie. The Hangover. It's a little bit more modern, but not too modern.
Speaker: Yeah, I still think it would be made today.
Speaker: I think it could be, too. um That that buddy film though there will always be even Even if they toned it down a lot, there will always be a...
Speaker: grown -ups Right. I don't think there was anything ever super egregious in that movie that would completely rule it out. um
Speaker: So yeah, I definitely think it would be.
Speaker: would be Oh. does stand the the time. Now... Can I ask one? Yeah, and and this happens back to. Today's society.
Speaker: Do you think? Dirty Harry. could be made today.
Speaker: No, i don't I don't think so. I agree. Because I think today's society with lawlessness. would not would not stand.
Speaker: for a cop like Dirty Harry. To exist in today's standard and again. um Another movie Death Wish. I don't think Death Wish would be made today.
Speaker: Even with. the plot of A guy that's... And and this happens with... Dirty Harry 2. people Just look at Dirty Harry as a cop.
Speaker: And he was, but he was also a cop. that sometimes would bend that rule. To ultimately get the bad guy. Where in Death Wish, another movie that I don't think would be made today, which is a great movie.
Speaker: um I think a lot of... The people today. Would not agree with the way Paul Kersey. does get his revenge in that movie.
Speaker: I don't think they would Even though his wife is murdered. His daughter is raped. Ah. I think people today. would of today's society would say yes but he shouldn't kill those people They should be able to.
Speaker: They have rights. And the same thing would go with Dirty Harry. Like they would be so pissed off that Dirty Harry would have done all those things to Scorpio.
Speaker: Just to find out if that girl is still alive, which we find out she wasn't. But I think people would honestly. Agree. with the way Scorpio is portrayed in that movie.
Speaker: they would still say that shouldn't have happened to him. Dirty Harry should have been fired.
Speaker: Yeah, definitely.
Speaker: I think.
Speaker: Yeah. I mean, even uttering that sentence right there just it it pisses me off because We will never go back to the way good movies were made. Because you will have people shit on them.
Speaker: because of some reason or another. Right. um So, and ah another movie. okay Scarface. No.
Speaker: I would have to agree I think. There's just...
Speaker: For today, I think there is just Too much violence, too many drugs. Um, And just in general. Tony Montana being such a...
Speaker: Horrible person. Well... And I'll say. ah Not to cut you off, continue. i'll I'll go with what I want to say after. Keep going. Keep going.
Speaker: um And. Tony Montana just being such. a horrible person and bad role model that it would be
Speaker: Just... Not in a great light, so to say.
Speaker: And I will say because of them portraying an immigrant who comes to America and becomes a drug kingpin. They would they wouldn't like it they They would want it changed.
Speaker: And. And that's what made Scarface such a great movie. It was the American dream. It - it happened in real life rather people of today's society want to admit it or not Castrol did.
Speaker: Want to send a bunch of immigrants here. And people go ahead, cancel me for saying this. But... when we accepted a lot of these people. from cuba Fidel Castro also put criminals. on those boats.
Speaker: that President Jimmy Carter. Head said, oh yeah, you know, ship them over here.
Speaker: And that's... What society of today doesn't understand with that movie? Tony Montana wasn't a bad guy. Yes, over in Cuba, he did horrible things. But when he came to America. He was not trying to become a drug. Kingpin.
Speaker: He really did try to make it work, but What happened in the 80s? Greed. Drugs. Like you look at shows like Miami Vice, which couldn't be made today.
Speaker: It was greed. It was... Oh. What they considered. The American Dream. And that's not what the American dream is. In a movie form, sure.
Speaker: But in real life the American dream is is that One day. We. I'll get that little slice of Pie. Even though it doesn't happen.
Speaker: That's the American Dream. Freedom. So I haven't. Interesting. That goes up. along with this. why Why do you think audiences sometimes turn...
Speaker: um characters who are clearly not meant to be. Like... someone that you Um... Admire. into someone. that they admire.
Speaker: Because we all have that part of ourselves. That. is that guy. Or is that person? and we suppress it
Speaker: I will go back to a movie that I don't think could be made today, and that is... Halloween. Um... for the simple point of Loomis saying,
Speaker: We're all afraid of the darkness inside of ourselves.
Speaker: And. I honestly think. Again. that that is The truth, we are all afraid of that darkness inside of us. I mean, some people aren't. We have serial killers. We have people that do. Horrible fucking shitty things every day.
Speaker: that get away with it because we are. Such idiots when it comes to. protect... to upholding laws. And...
Speaker: I honestly think if you remade Scarface today...
Speaker: It would be different. It would be very different. he would be He would be applauded. He really would. And and granted... Even today, you see people wear Tony Montana shirts. You see people have the quotes. You see people have tattoos with Tony Montana's face on them, the quotes, all that.
Speaker: He... He was. the definition of what most people saw The glitz and glamour of the 80s. the excess. And.
Speaker: I just, I don't think you could objectively. Talk about it today In the same aspect of, like you said, what Tony Montana did.
Speaker: to get to where he was. was wrong.
Speaker: But today's society would not see it that way.
Speaker: They would see it as, well, no, the government held them down. So he fought against a corrupt government. And in some ways he did. In that movie back then.
Speaker: But see And I want to harp him back to. Dirty Harry, or Magnum Force, the second one. When. Uh...
Speaker: Briggs. tells Harry, you hate this system. You hate playing by the rules. And. Dirty Harry says, of course I hate the damn system.
Speaker: But until someone comes along that. makes it make more sense, I'm going to follow that system. Okay. And I think...
Speaker: That's what we are missing. And and I'm not... this is such a I love this episode. But you know what? i It's the truth.
Speaker: and why these movies can't be made today. Right. Because we aren't those people. of yesteryear. that. believed in a dream.
Speaker: of a of Whatever that may be. You know, having that little extra change, having a family, raising them. not worrying about you know all this shit we have to worry about today And...
Speaker: I just think a lot of these movies should stay where they're at.
Speaker: Um...
Speaker: because you can't re you can't recreate any of that and granted we are getting a scar supposedly getting a scarface remake Surround based. I.
Speaker: I don't know. I just I don't think it'll be good. Especially when they remade Superfly. which back in the 70s during the blaxploitation era um Was a good movie.
Speaker: Great movie. um when they finally remade it. It was so far from what. Made. the classic. Good. That it just it was shit Yeah.
Speaker: Um. So moving on to the next movie. Okay. You, you. briefly mentioned it. The Breakfast Club.
Speaker: No, see, I don't... i I think it could be But yeah again, it would be different. Um... Seeing how suicide and and I know YouTube is not going to like me saying this word. but seeing as how Suicider All that.
Speaker: is in our very fabric of today's society.
Speaker: Like I don't have the statistics, but it is very high. It's very high in our veterans. That comeback. It's very high in...
Speaker: And our. moral fabric. so to speak. And... When? We find out that the nerd. has contemplated that
Speaker: It's like...
Speaker: Eh, eh. It's not taboo anymore like it was back then. in the 80s. Like, yes, it's always happened. Suicide is always happened.
Speaker: But... It was talked about in hushed tones.
Speaker: Where today. Granted, yes, it's still kind of that way. But it's almost...
Speaker: It's getting talked about more. now Yes. Very much. Um... And also... It's been a while since I watched A Breakfast Club, I'll admit, but... I do believe that the nerd character played by Anthony Michael Hall.
Speaker: talks about Um... bringing a gun to school because he failed he got a b or something on a Test. And. Um...
Speaker: Again. Back then that was taboo. you but in today's society. It happens. You know, and and I'm not trying to I hate big words. I'm not trying to make it sound okay.
Speaker: because it's not. It is a very big. thing that we deal with in today's society. Um... Were. I don't think it will ever end but When you have people talking. And that's what the Breakfast Club is.
Speaker: It starts off as outcasts from different... social groups you have the nerd you have the jock you have the The druggie, the quiet, the... the rich preppy girl in there.
Speaker: And. They eventually become friends and some of them become lovers. Um...
Speaker: Ah.
Speaker: I think the general tone. Could be. brought to today's standard. how they would do it. is what i would be hung up on, but.
Speaker: Yeah, so... Boop. Bye.
Speaker: I think that... general premise of the movie. would work. However, in the setting that it's in. Like a Saturday detention.
Speaker: That doesn't exist anymore. won't ever exist anymore. So they would have to find a way that audiences could. still connect with the movie because you're... youre Action piece.
Speaker: And so that's where it kind of teeters on the well, maybe. for me. Yeah. I mean... Yes. it it It does deal with class.
Speaker: a class system within the movie. but It also shows that, you know what? We can all. talk. We can all disagree. And that's what society is missing today.
Speaker: And. With the Breakfast Club movie. however they would remake it, you would also have to have that discussion. You couldn't have it as a Oh, I'm... i'm a liberal and you're a Republican, you're wrong.
Speaker: or a Republican saying the same thing. You couldn't have that.
Speaker: And that's what made it. It didn't matter what you were back then. You could be a liberal Republican mega.
Speaker: Democrat, whatever. It didn't matter back then. Everyone. Would come together. And. Discuss things. and say, you know what? Hey.
Speaker: That's your opinion. I don't agree with it. But... You're okay. In my book. You know We defended people that had different opinions then. Today. We attack them.
Speaker: For why? and And that's why i say I get hung up on if that movie could be remade. where would actually deliver.
Speaker: A purpose or a message. That, you know, hey. We're all... we we We hated each other at first, but now we came back and we're... We're we're buddies, we're lovers, we're friends, we're pals.
Speaker: All that.
Speaker: And... John Hughes really did touch on that. with his teenage movies back then.
Speaker: Yeah. um So. Another movie. Stepbrothers
Speaker: Yeah. I... I would agree. i think I think it's a modern enough movie. that I don't see there really necessarily being an issue with it being.
Speaker: standing time, or at least not. Yet, anyways. because like you like This one kind of comes back to being in that same...
Speaker: Same idea of like... um
Speaker: Of. like grown -ups and all of those types of movies. um The brotherly love. So to say. um
Speaker: And yet it still gets... It still gets to the point of...
Speaker: here's Here's a blended family. And shows the imperfections of having a blended family and how.
Speaker: EEEE You can definitely start out. absolutely hating each other and then in the end
Speaker: Um.
Speaker: Becoming. step bros and bro do we just speak Did we just become best friends? No, no. These things happen.
Speaker: Now... I don't know how many of the... These movies I showed you. but I think I showed you the movie Shaft.
Speaker: Richard Roundtree. Blaxploitation movie. Yes, it sounds familiar. i it Do you think?
Speaker: The blaxploitation movies of the 70s. Would be. Made today. Oh absolutely not. Why?
Speaker: I... I think again, that's just a topic that is so under the microscope today. That... You do one wrong thing.
Speaker: in the movie And the mob would come after it. Yeah.
Speaker: um So yeah, I don't think any of those types of movies would. would last in today. And granted... Even if they could, I really wouldn't want them again.
Speaker: I think they were so great back then. I mean, you made stars out of. Richard Roundtree, who is what? Again. It was.
Speaker: Uh... Diverse. And it was... Partion of. Society. That said, okay. Why can't a black person? Be the hero.
Speaker: Why can't he be Dirty Harry? Why can't he be Lieutenant Frank Bullet? um Why can't he be cool?
Speaker: And you got Shaft. Right. And I i think... They just made such a strong statement. Back then. yeah That I just don't think.
Speaker: I think everybody would look past it today. Yeah.
Speaker: Uh.
Speaker: well Um, do you think Do you think? Um. National Lampoon's Animal House could be made today.
Speaker: I'm gonna go with no I think it comes back to... just how how raunchy of a movie it was is again I think it. You would have to strip it down so much that it just would lose its purpose.
Speaker: Well, I mean, yeah. even ah Even... Where he's peeping through the window. You know, I ignore he's under the bleachers looking up the skirts, you know, like I That right there today in today's society, no, that's cut.
Speaker: Right. Um...
Speaker: There's so many parts. parts of that movie that would be cut today. Yeah, I yeah it It would... It would be just so stripped down. It would just...
Speaker: It would lose its identity. Do you think Jaws? could be made today
Speaker: I think for the most part it could be because it... Was just so focused on.
Speaker: on trying to catch Or kill the...
Speaker: Check. I think they would look at the shark in today's society as the victim. I think they would But and granted oh big What? What Jaws spawned with people hunting sharks and all that because they made such a believable villain out of a great white. I do not agree with that.
Speaker: I think that that is terrible that people looked at this movie and said, hey, you know what, I'm going to go out and hunt sharks. Um... I think that's terrible.
Speaker: You know, um And I think the world is missing. one of the greatest conservation supporters of all time and Steve Irwin.
Speaker: Um... He really made us think. about Animals. And I mean, there there was also... um Jack Hanna.
Speaker: I think he's still alive. he's still Um... all those times they would go on like Carson or, or not. yeah Ah.
Speaker: Johnny Carson and and David Letterman and Jay Leno and all them. Um... And show off those beautiful creatures like, yeah, I don't want to be near a snake.
Speaker: that the size of some of them ones they bring on them shows. But, you know. Near a snake, period. um it's It's the beauty of nature.
Speaker: and i think in today's now if they did remake jaws for today's thing you know it's going to be cgi So the shark's going to look like a goddamn Godzilla looking like monster.
Speaker: Um, And two. Um...
Speaker: God, I had some, I really had something with it too, but I forgot. the second part Um. Two. I think...
Speaker: Again, I think they would look at it. Well. So to me. What is JAWS? is nature. going against humans.
Speaker: like something in nature. finally telling us humans that, hey, You don't run this. You may build skyscrapers, you may think you're in charge, but no, no, no, no, no, buckaroos.
Speaker: and And I think that's what Jaws was even back then. it was nature showing us That. We.
Speaker: aren't in control. At the snap of her fingers, Mother Nature could send us back to an ice age. Yeah. ah So another movie.
Speaker: Okay. Talladega Nights.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It was stupid comedy, Alyssa. It's not like... So... You mentioned stepbrothers I think there will always be. A place in society for stupid comedy.
Speaker: I mean... grown -ups. they continue to make them adam sandler continues to make the movies he makes Will Ferrell. continues to make the movies he makes. um Pineapple Express with Seth Rogen.
Speaker: you know, Those comedies will always have a place. Stoner comedies will always have a place. in society as well. It's just... The sophisticated.
Speaker: comedies. that do not have a place in today's society because Yet again. Yeah.
Speaker: Blazing Saddles made you think.
Speaker: Animal House made you think.
Speaker: American Pie. Stepbrothers All that jackass. Did not make you think. It made you. think that You could do that shit and not get hurt.
Speaker: and Boogalows, guys. Look at... Most of them were drug addicts. or had to cope use something to cope with that pain because ah That shit hurts.
Speaker: Right. And you have society that think they can do that shit and it's not going to hurt. Like, yeah, it's going to fucking hurt.
Speaker: So specifically specifically though Do you think that the character Ricky Bobby would be...
Speaker: canceled or do you think he'd be the love. war. um
Speaker: What do you think would happen with this character? Um... Well... I think the rampant homophobia in the movie would be.
Speaker: really cut down. Um...
Speaker: Just because of... When? the French guy comes over and they make him gay.
Speaker: I think that would be cut down. Or... ah No, that part would be enhanced. But like, them being against him would be... drop down to like zero.
Speaker: And again, today's society looks at that movie and probably thinks oh well it's bashing on Uh... Gay people, it's not. That's the problem with today's society is they fixate on one thing. And it's something that they're told that they should fixate on because it makes them a good human being or whatever bullshit. No.
Speaker: ah Ricky Bobby. it shows you that, okay, this dumb hum but dumb redneck that wants to go fast. becomes a big success, well then... something new comes in. and takes that all away.
Speaker: And he has the fall. Well then. When... He finally comes to accept. The French driver. Like...
Speaker: Eh. Hey. This shit happens in NASCAR daily. Like, you're going to have rivalries. And that's what Talladega Nights about Ricky Bobby is. He had to come around to understand that.
Speaker: this new driver is Better than me. and wants to push me to be better. And when he finally does become... the equal to the french driver that's when That's what people should look at it as.
Speaker: Um. I think modern comedy is still... Could be done today maybe more dumbed down. But. Another movie that...
Speaker: I would say couldn't be made today. I would say would be the Billy Jack movies or even Walking Tall.
Speaker: because it deals with that well So Billy Jack. The reason why I think it wouldn't be made today. Is because again.
Speaker: It would be over politicized. And I mean, those movies were very political in nature back then. It talked about... you know how we should love each other.
Speaker: Which? No brainer. We all should. Um, it created that atmosphere of we're all in this together.
Speaker: Um... And it also created that atmosphere of. the government's against us. Which again... We deal with that every day today. Um...
Speaker: well if you're open -minded. And not, you know. believing everything you're told. Um...
Speaker: And the same thing would go with walking tall. You know. People. Okay. Yeah. And it doesn't matter what people think about the real Buford Pusser.
Speaker: Walking tall is a fictionalized account of what may or may not happen. in his life. Good. The actors, and and I want to say this to the people out there that go out on forums on Facebook and believe all this bullshit about.
Speaker: whatever with the real story of Buford Pusser and walking tall and all that. The actors weren't. out there. trying to make Buford Pusser. the real person look good.
Speaker: They were making the fictionalized version of Buford Pusser look good.
Speaker: Because even back in Buford Pusser's day. You had laws. People had. Rights. Even if they were shitty people, they still had rights.
Speaker: And to people that shit on the actors who portrayed a character. in a movie. Shame on them. Um... Yes, walking tall.
Speaker: Went all out on the whole A small town guy becomes sheriff and has to do whatever it takes to... Save the day. In today's society that would not fly.
Speaker: Because again, Even the bad people have rights. Even if they don't deserve that. and they commit heinous crimes.
Speaker: They still have rights. And. It sickens me we live in a world today where A mother. has killed three children And...
Speaker: Has it go fund me? has people that are saying, oh, well, you know... she might be mentally ill or, oh, she might have this problem or, you know, whatever.
Speaker: We live in a world where. It's scary.
Speaker: And that's why movies back in the day. you could go to a movie and escape Watergate. Scandal. Or you could go to a movie. when one of the greatest human tragedies of all time Today, 9 -11.
Speaker: Happened 25 years ago. Movies are an escape. They're not meant to look at society and say. Oh, you don't like this type of person? Well.
Speaker: Fuck you, you know. It's not supposed to be that way. and you have directors that are trying to make it that way.
Speaker: And that's why a lot of these movies back then. couldn't be made today. Because you didn't have preachy directors. You didn't have writers that were trying to make you believe in their bullshit that they were force -fed when they were kids. and forced to believe it.
Speaker: You had people that were going out there. and making movies. that resonated with the everyday American person. Or a not even American person. Just an everyday average person.
Speaker: that went to work and maybe hated their boss. or was pushed down enough to where they wanted to fight back against their aggressor.
Speaker: And movies showed you that you could do that.
Speaker: Yeah. um So. let's Let's end on a... A lighter note. Hey, you chose this. You chose this.
Speaker: You know how I feel about old movies. And you know how I feel about today's standards. with those old movies. Yes. So, the movie, Tommy Boy.
Speaker: If it was up to me, yes. But again, it's... x So I i think the the premise of the movie. would work.
Speaker: But I think it would just lose so much without Chris Farley. Well and again, it's not even just him. They would tone down.
Speaker: The banter between the two characters. Right, and I think that... Yeah. Like, there's absolutely no way that Spade would get hit in the head with a ah board. It wasn't Spade, it was Tommy.
Speaker: It was Farley. i said yep no and and again that that's No. So... What I mean by tone down, so when he's like, oh my god, I can hear you getting fatter.
Speaker: Cut. They'd cut that out. Great. They would cut out.
Speaker: They would cut out Um... They would cut out so much of that banter back and forth. And everyone. really what makes the movie. Ah. God, there's another movie.
Speaker: When you said Tommy boy that I'm really, really wanting to speak on because it's like I could. I could just see it not. Like people not liking it today, and I just... Oh Um...
Speaker: Because you said Tommy Boy and I was just like, damn. Perfect. Um. And then you're talking about. You know the aspects of the movie fuck i'm gonna hate myself it's such a great movie too i just i can't bring myself to remember the name of it Um,
Speaker: Who's in the movie? Well, Alyssa, if I knew that I'd remember. but Damn. ah Ah, it's such a good, and you've seen the movie with, Dumb and Dumber.
Speaker: Oh yeah.
Speaker: And the reason is this.
Speaker: They would censor Them killing the parakeet.
Speaker: Um...
Speaker: They would censor the trucker who is going to ah Rape Lloyd. Um, They would take out the um Uh... They would take out the. um
Speaker: They take out the toilet scene. Right. they would They would butcher the movie. Yeah. and And same thing would go with Tommy boy.
Speaker: Yeah, I agree. I think.
Speaker: I think it... Those are two movies again that that would end up losing their identity because they would just strip the hell out of them. Yeah. And I think that's why.
Speaker: We as a society need to stop being apart. and start coming back together. Because those movies made us laugh.
Speaker: There was movies that made us cry. And. It's really sad when you look back on this episode and and there's going to be people in today's society that are going to be like, oh, well, that's not true. Oh, they could make Blazing South Day. No, you fucking couldn't.
Speaker: You couldn't. They didn't even want it back then. But because you had one of the greatest Mines. in history in Mel Brooks saying, well, why couldn't we make it?
Speaker: And another... One. Last one. I don't think they can make a salt on three. Precinct 13. in today's standards. because of the child being shot.
Speaker: Great. Um... Again. it would be it'd be it be tri Yeah. today's society would agree with the street gang.
Speaker: Um... Okay. Another Carpenter movie I don't think they would make today is Escape from New York. Even though there's talks of a remake, there's been for many years.
Speaker: um
Speaker: Whatever you think of New York is. People's opinion. Um...
Speaker: Okay. If you know me, I don't. very think it's very good place anymore. Um. There's a few places like that. I live in. I live in a state that has a place like that.
Speaker: Um,
Speaker: It's all ah They're all over. but
Speaker: And I think Halloween's another one. Um. just because of Bob sang. First I rip yours clothes off and then i'll we rip Lindsay's clothes off.
Speaker: Because today people are fucking shitting on that. It's a movie, people. I don't really think John Carpenter put it in there because he's a but horrible person.
Speaker: It's a fucking movie. It was a joke.
Speaker: And yeah, I'm sure I'm going to get hate comments for that. But, you know, it was it was a fucking joke in a movie. It was a throwaway line. That happens in movies people Um...
Speaker: but I honestly think. It is sad that... A lot of those movies couldn't be made today because, again, people would get hung up on the simplest fucking things because, you know, they're all fucking.
Speaker: to
Speaker: too stuck in their ways. that and Their minds aren't fucking... ah Right. It's like... There too.
Speaker: Sheltered. in today's society. We are. We are. I don't care what people say Go ahead, say I'm fucking fascist or whatever in the comments. It's true. we are we have kids nowadays that are too sheltered from movies that i watched when i was a kid Granted.
Speaker: It probably wasn't right that my parents allowed me to watch. Halloween. when I was six years old. Still watched it. Then turn me into Michael Myers.
Speaker: Didn't turn me into a boogeyman. It's a fucking movie. I learned right from wrong. And in today's society. That's why these movies couldn't be today.
Speaker: Because we have lost that.
Speaker: And...
Speaker: I hate. That I have to say that but We have. we've We've lost. that right and wrong. Um... Yeah, GTA.
Speaker: All that. It's fun to play. It is. it is but You don't have people. But the right. frame of mind that can say It's just a video game. It's not real life.
Speaker: Like if I do that stuff. Consequences. To my actions of doing something like that in real life. Michael Myers.
Speaker: in real life would have consequences to his actions.
Speaker: End. We as a society do not believe that. that anymore.
Speaker: And that's what scares me.
Speaker: And that's what movies try to tell us. They tried to tell us back then. That we were heading towards what we're heading towards. And people laughed it off. Um...
Speaker: Red Dawn I don't think could be made today. because of how close we came to. the nuclear World War III. war back then.
Speaker: That's all everyone talks about today. is we're so close to world war three oh my god world war three And we're not. We're really not. It's just...
Speaker: Again. We're allowing. And movies back in the day. said Exactly what we're dealing with today with the news. being so fucking blatantly biased.
Speaker: and spreading so much bullshit. We had movies that told us that John Carpenter They live. Literally told us.
Speaker: The the news was evil
Speaker: And people laughed it off. ah No, the news would never lie to us.
Speaker: Is there a reason why they live ain't being remade? Maybe because Carpenter was telling us that you know we believe in the almighty dollar. Too much. You put sunglasses on and that almighty dollar turns into, this is your God.
Speaker: Maybe we all need to put on. special pair of sunglasses that make us see what the world truly is And then come together. Be human fucking beings.
Speaker: I hate being sounding preachy, but. that this this episode
Speaker: kind of Gets into what I'm saying about it Is that.
Speaker: We... Have people in the wrong that think they're the moral fucking compass of it all
Speaker: And these movies. have always tried to tell us. What was going to truly happen with the with. the future. I mean, hell, Back to the Future tried to tell us that by 2015, we were going to have flying cars, we were going to have hoverboards, we were going to have...
Speaker: Ronald Reagan evidently was going to be alive as a fucking robot. We laughed at it. We didn't take it serious. today's Audience would. But instead of...
Speaker: Reagan, they'd put Trump in it. Just again. Do that stupid shit again.
Speaker: And so that's why I will always say this. Every generation. we'll find a way to censor what we find funny.
Speaker: That's why you can't find Blazing Saddle. Very much. anywhere anymore. Unless it's on Amazon that you can buy. That isn't edited.
Speaker: Um...
Speaker: But I do... I do hold out hope. That is. Someone came up with the next great comedy. That it wouldn't be a piece of shit.
Speaker: Um.
Speaker: That that's me being you know. Probably gullible. Bye. I hold out hope. I hold out hope every day. that something in our mind switches and people say hey you know what no matter what this person looks like or what she looks like what he looks like We're all human beings.
Speaker: And. you know. today. on September 11th. Um. Think we need to remember that and I agree. I think we need to go back to movies.
Speaker: Not shit on them for trying something different. And just realize that movies are an escape from reality. which is what they were created for. Video games, same way, music.
Speaker: Um, well, music back in the day. Today's music is shit. Um. But you know and And I know some people look at what I've said today as preachy or anti this, anti that. No. I just... simply answered a question based off the title that we came up with.
Speaker: We will debate. We may not always agree. My wife will tell you we probably don't agree as much as we. Probably should. But. We don't need to always agree.
Speaker: But we all always need to stop with this fucking. Blaming. And. oh, well, you like this person, you're a racist, or oh, you like that person, you're sexist, misogynist, all that bullshit.
Speaker: We need to come together.
Speaker: For the sake of. humankind and society. and I think we can. i think we can it's just people need to Turn off the fucking news.
Speaker: Stop believing everything they fucking read and hear and see. And just remember that we're all fucking in and in this together. before those movies.
Speaker: Prove to us. what we're already seeing. Um...
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Because... Go ahead. I don't care if a person's trans. Gay. straight, whatever. you're a human being Um.
Speaker: Yeah. I... I... I can't believe we I've heard so many people say this. and society but we are human beings We can have differing opinions.
Speaker: And if I get comments saying I'm Such a bad person. Go ahead, call me in. I know.
Speaker: You think fucking people on the internet are going to fucking scare me enough to not want to do this? I do this shit because it's fun. I'm not out here to fucking be a moral compass or fucking tell you what you should believe in or anything My wife doesn't do it either We're just doing this because it's fun. We're not looking to be famous or rich or any shit like that.
Speaker: I mean, fuck. If we went out. Tomorrow. And we were a big name, like... Nuh -uh. Who knows, it might happen one day, but... I'll throw out Jacksepticeye.
Speaker: Big name like him. And tomorrow we decided we were going to go to a children's hospital. It wouldn't change. Who we are.
Speaker: We have compassion. For people. hell i work in a field What? People that are. mentally disabled.
Speaker: Just helping them. Have that independence. And maybe most of these people in today's society need to go work that fucking job.
Speaker: And they'll find out. It doesn't fucking matter what you identify as or whatever. By being a simple fucking human being.
Speaker: Why can't we go back to that
Speaker: Why can't we? you know, do what those songs back in the 70s told us about grabbing someone by the hand and dancing with them and singing kumbaya until the so stars came back up.
Speaker: Why can't we?
Speaker: Well, on on that note, I think We should wrap this up. What do you think? are Sorry. I feel like it had to be said
Speaker: because When? You have movies back then. And you're trying to see if they would still have that same appeal today. I don't think they would Which is sad.
Speaker: It is. But Alyssa, what's our next episode going to be about?
Speaker: Hmm.
Speaker: I'm just getting back into this so I hadn't thought that far forward yet. Hmph.
Speaker: Well... As the guys from Top Gear and American Tour or Grand Tour would always say, and I'm that bitter disappointment. Time to end the show. Thank you. Thank you everyone for continuing to support us, even though me and my wife can't figure out what the fuck we're going to do next week.
Speaker: Sorry. That's what happens when you partner with each other. um But actually... Peace.
Speaker: We can't forget our catchphrase. Happily married. Questionably certified.
