Transcript
Speaker: Hello, everyone, and welcome back to another episode of the podcast. In today's episode, we are going to do another solo one, and i am going to talk to you about the topic of comparison.
Speaker: And how the episode is going to flow is we're going to talk a little bit around comparison, what it's actually costing us. I'll give a little bit of my own story background into some of this as well.
Speaker: want to talk a little bit about the machine that's driving this comparison in so many of us and why it's such an epidemic. And we'll talk diet culture, capitalism and the influencer industry.
Speaker: And I promise this won't be super giving out negative all the time. I'm going to just be really, really proactive about this. And then we're going to talk about connecting with your joy, your spark and how to get over the fear of and actually doing what you want to do and focusing on you rather than comparing your life, um your goals, your progress to others.
Speaker: So the first thing I'm going to say in this episode is comparison is the thief of joy. Please don't stop listening just because I've said that. I know it's cliche, but it is so true.
Speaker: and By comparing ourselves to others. It keeps us from believing in ourselves. It stops us from being grateful for what we actually already have.
Speaker: And it hides how far we've actually come. It's like the one sure way to ruin anything positive in your life. and It ruins any win, a weight loss, a promotion, a new hobby, a business, a five k run If we cannot focus in on our own achievement and our own experience of the journey to the goal or our own experience of achieving the goal, and we're so focused on what other people around us are doing,
Speaker: then we will never be happy. We will never be satisfied and we'll end up living quite an ungrateful life. And I don't know about you, but I don't want to be ungrateful and I don't want to be unhappy either. So I kind of just want to talk a little bit about where this like where this actually comes from, because we all have it in us to a certain degree, some more than others. where some people are crippled by the the comparison of, you know, with their colleagues, with their peers, with their classmates, with their friends, with their family, and everything feels like a competition. And then others, maybe not so much, but there'll always be someone who triggers us or some situation where we start to feel smaller than the people that that are around us. So,
Speaker: Where does that come from and why is that something that's that's so seems to be so innately human? And. and In my opinion, I think this very much comes from the media, from generations, decades, decades,
Speaker: and generations of us being fed media to make us think that we are not enough and that we won't be complete until, and please insert here, you know, whatever whatever the thing is. and Like even when I think back to my own childhood, right, I can't remember, and if I think about my own body image, for example, I can't think of a time in my life where When in my young life where I wasn't comparing myself to someone else. i as early back as I can remember into my childhood in school, I was always looking around what others were doing and trying to measure myself against them. And then when it came to body image, yet as young as I remember being on holidays at 11 years old and.
Speaker: looking around at people who were thinner than me, more beautiful than me, were more tanned than me, were like this was my little 11 year old brain and just really looking in the mirror and and hating the way I looked. I mean, like why can't I look more like those people?
Speaker: And it's only now as I've kind of ah really kind of researching these areas of mindset and and these mental blocks that we have Then I'm like, this stems back to what we were consuming as kids.
Speaker: So some of you will relate to this. Some of you will have your own version of this. But I remember being probably as young as 10. ten And I looked like, ed did anyone watch TLC or Nickelodeon? Was it TLC? Maybe that's not what it was called. TLC is the band. Nickelodeon anyway. And there was definitely a TV channel before Nickelodeon. I can't remember what it was called. But anyway, I used to love watching s Sweet Valley High. Oh, my God, it was my favorite TV show. I also loved California Dreams um and but particularly s Sweet Valley High. I loved it. and And I loved reading the books as well. So I used to read the Sweet Valley High books and I used to watch the Sweet Valley High show on the TV and just made my life. um
Speaker: But when I think back in it now, what that was actually promoting was, you know, about being being young, blonde, tanned, beautiful, rich, popular. it was always about how people looked and it not as much in the TV show. But I remember reading the books and it was always about, you know, her bronzed skin and, you know, and the beautiful, and large patioed kitchen and it was always just but everything was very grand everything was very um beautiful and and I think at that young age yeah really just being like fed this kind of narrative that that beautiful is a certain look and that successful is a certain look and
Speaker: um that That's probably my early memories of of that. And then it was like the teen movies, you know, like we all have those, you know, those teen movies. What was there? She's all that. And and anything, I suppose, with Freddie Prinze Jr. back in the day, we've all been there. We've all watched those movies. And but when you think about a lot of the the narrative in a lot of those teen movies in the 90s and the two the early 2000s, in the 90s in particular, it was all about popularity. It was all about beauty. It was all about fashion And there's nothing wrong with beauty and fashion, of course not. But it's it's all that a lot of us were consuming as teenagers. And then we look at the teen magazines and it was all about again, it was all about how we look and not much more depth to it than that. And then as I got older, we' we're looking at, you know, the slightly older magazines, you know, the OKs, the hellos, the the different. but and And I'm not like I'm not narrowing down one thing.
Speaker: magazine brand. It was all the magazines, but it was always about celebrities. It was always about pop stars, movie stars, and the female ones. It was always about how much weight they've gained or how thin they looked and how sick they looked. Or i bet that person only weighs 97 pounds or she's gained weight. She used to be 97 pounds. Now she's 120 pounds like that was a huge amount of weight to be which you know if I was 120 pounds I'd be very very very thin and so there was always this narrative around these pop stars and then the reality tv came in and it was all just about fabulousness but about how people looked but very much like a lot of those especially those English magazines that really were a big deal in the early two thousand s It was always analyzing things.
Speaker: always analyzing how these women looked. and And when I look back on it now, I'm like, no wonder I felt small. I felt that felt it in the pit of my stomach that I wasn't good enough, that I wasn't pretty enough. And oh, God, that person is considered overweight. I must be overweight or, you know, that person has that unflattering picture taken. But like, that's probably how I look at, it you know, and you start comparing yourself and it's just one thing after another. And When we're in it, were we're not thinking about that. We're not thinking about how harmful that is. And the narrative of all these magazines, and I don't maybe they're still like that. I don't read these magazines anymore. And I know the emergence of the Internet, probably less people read these magazines, but they probably, ah i presume these magazines just have social media pages now.
Speaker: I don't follow them, so so I'm not 100% sure. But... what One thing they never did was they never discussed these females' education or their business accomplishments or their charity work or their talent or yeah the sheer impact they were making on the world with their music or with their acting or with their businesses or whatever.
Speaker: it there There was none of that. It was always just about how they looked. And like when you think about like Britney and we like we look at Britney Spears and she's had she's had such a difficult life, particularly in recent in in the past decade or two, the back past couple of decades. But those was early years when she was top of her game, those magazines wanted to do nothing but tear her down.
Speaker: one And now people look back on early years, Britney, like she's an icon. And it's like, but while she was an icon, everyone just wanted to tear her down and wanted to criticize how she looked or how she parented or how she did this or how she did that. And no wonder that so many of of these stars end up.
Speaker: Not OK, and um how we are left with this feeling of not enoughness. And. of needing more things or more improvements to ourselves to be enough. And I suppose then our modern version of this is social media.
Speaker: And before we get into this, I just want to say this. I love social media. Social media has changed my life. It helped me be able to leave a 15 year teaching career, build two businesses and, um,
Speaker: And live a really, really nice, flexible, free life, which, you know, from the previous episode with my values, that freedom is so, so important to me. i am And I get to live a life where I'm connected with myself and my clients, my family family.
Speaker: That's another one of my values, super important and a life of health. My whole business is but is built around health. am So I'm very, very aligned with my values and I'm very, very grateful that we live in a world where we have social media and we have that free marketing and that the possibilities are endless. Like it's never been a more exciting time to be alive. Like the opportunities that we have with social media, if you have any type of business goal or any type of of goal of a side gig or just a passion project or something that you want to do and get out in the world.
Speaker: There's never been an easier time for people to actually get to know about it because you have social media, which is free. And we're going to talk about so social media being free now in a second. and So I am. I'm very, very pro social media.
Speaker: when we use it correctly. And I don't just mean use it for putting things onto social media and promoting your business or your side gig or your passion project. project Even with consuming it, we need to consume it in a more intentional way, which I'll talk about in a minute. But if we look at social media,
Speaker: A lot of people look at, let's say, influencers and I don't like being called an influencer because I'm like the worst influencer ever. I i don't really work with brands. I don't like since leaving teaching, I don't like being told what to do. And I find if I work with brands, they're trying to sell their products and they're trying to you know pay me to to. and And I'm like, it's just so inauthentic. It's like putting on a show. I just can't.
Speaker: not be authentic. I just it it just doesn't sit right with me. So I don't really work with brands. And so I'm definitely not an influencer. I like to see myself as an educator and then obviously a business owner and a coach. So and but the influence people look at influencers and especially a lot of people like my generation and older, like 40 plus, they look at influencers like, oh, silly little influencers. The influencer industry is estimated to be worth it.
Speaker: forty point 40.5 billion dollars by the end of 2026. 40.5 billion is the influencer marketing industry.
Speaker: That like, think about that number for a second. Influencers are not silly. Influencers are not stupid. Influencers are some of the most ah most powerful people in the world at the minute because they're the one Because they're the ones that carry the attention and attention is the most valuable thing. i am And I just want to talk a little bit about that in social media.
Speaker: um I will bring this back around to comparison, but I just think this is really something important to understand when it comes to consuming social media. So social media is free.
Speaker: I think everyone can agree in general. You could open your phone, you can download Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, whatever, and you can go scrolling. It doesn't cost you anything except for your time and your attention. Right. um It's free.
Speaker: But. Most people who are consuming social media see themselves as the customer. But if you're not paying for something. You're not the customer.
Speaker: So who is the customer? So the customer is the companies, the business owners, the big industries, the little business owners, anyone who's paying for advertising on social media. They're the customers. They're the social media customers. That's how social media makes their money is the people who are paying for the ads to be put in on the social media feeds.
Speaker: They're the customers. So if you, the consumer. Is not the customer. then what are you? You're the product.
Speaker: You're what's being sold. So it's your attention that social media are selling to the people who are paying for the ads.
Speaker: And I think once you hear that, you can't unhear that. So when it comes to social media, the most important thing is watch time. and You know, if you're posting on social media, you want people you want people to watch your videos. And the the algorithm when it comes to posting is about, you know, it rewards the videos that keeps people's attention the longest.
Speaker: So this is why, you know, the likes of recipes and funny videos and cute dog videos tend to go viral because, you know, they're very general. Lots of people enjoy them and and it's lots of watch time. It keeps eyes on the app. So once, because think about it, if social media,
Speaker: If everyone was like, oh, well, fuck this, I'm not watching social media anymore. Then the social media companies would die because no one would pay for advertising if it didn't work. But that's where everyone is. No one really watches TV anymore. They're all scrolling on their phones. So social media is where the people's eyes are. It's where the attention is.
Speaker: And it that's what makes it worth so much money. So what I think is really important to know when we're looking on social media and we're comparing ourselves to others, that social media is very much designed that way. This is this is this is entertainment.
Speaker: This is capitalism masked as and as entertainment. You are being made feel like you are not enough if you don't have the latest product, the latest cosmetics, the latest clothes, the latest workout program.
Speaker: this is it's it's It's the magazines, it's the teen magazines all over again, except on social media. if you are following the wrong kind of accounts. So we all love a good scroll.
Speaker: I love a good scroll as well. It's a nice little bit of escapism, but I think it's very important to start being a little bit more intentional about how we scroll and what we consume and to know that it's about watch time. So if you look at a video and it's not something that you really and doesn't make you feel good to watch, if you watch that to the end, the algorithm is going to show you more videos like that. So you're going to continue to see things that don't make you feel good.
Speaker: So I always use an example of Conor McGregor, for example. I hate i hate Conor McGregor. I don't say hate a lot, but I really, really, really do not like that guy.
Speaker: and i like I like a lot of mindset, personal development, business content. So that's a lot of stuff that comes up in my feed. So um every now and again, Conor McGregor will come up with like mindset videos will up with of Conor McGregor will come up.
Speaker: And when I see when I see his little fucking face, I'm like as quick as I can, I'll swipe by because I'm like, god I don't want him on my newsfeed. And if I watch his video, more of his videos are going to come up. And now that I'm talking about him, my phone is beside me. He's going to come up on my newsfeed now that I've mentioned him. and But so I will I'll never stop at a ah like I'll never stop at a Conor McGregor video because I i i don't want to see Conor McGregor on my feet.
Speaker: So remember that next time you see something that's not making you feel good, if you stay and watch it, you're torturing yourself because the feed is going to show you more of that. And if you're intentional and you're like, I'm here to to watch funny videos, only stop on the funny videos. Anything you see, it's flick past quickly. And this is the thing that I find funny you about social media as well. You know, like the haters online, the people who like to post nasty comments.
Speaker: on other people to give out to people on social media and put comments under their their content. What people don't realize is a lot of creators want you to comment on their posts. And the reason why they want you to comment is while you're commenting, that video is playing in the background, which is watch time, which means it makes their video more likely to go viral.
Speaker: So while you're angrily there, you know, typing whatever it is you're typing to into that creator's account, you're just that's playing in the background and means then that the algorithm is going to send you more of their videos. So the best thing that you could do if you see something that you don't like or you disagree with online is to flick straight past it. Don't give it your attention. Your attention is the most valuable thing that you have nowadays. It is the most important thing. It's what every creator, it's what every business, it's what every social media mogul wants is your attention and collectively all of our attention.
Speaker: So just start to be intentional with that. And when if you're following people that make that you're comparing yourself to just unfollow them. If you're and a lot of that influencer industry as well. And there's some fantastic influencers out there. There's people on social media making a massive difference. And if you actually feel your feed full of.
Speaker: uplifting, inspiring, educational, thought provoking, funny, feel good. There's so so much positive content out there that if we all just focused our attention on more of that,
Speaker: then all the negative would fizzle away because no one would be fun no one would be watching it. So it's important to remember that what we focus on grows, which which you know is a universal law, but this is also very, very true in the world of social media. So when it comes to comparison, just remember social media, modern day Trashy magazines if you're not following the right kind of content. So use your social media to grow as a person, not to shrink as a person. If you if it's making you feel like you need to shrink, you're not consuming the right stuff for you.
Speaker: And the thing about social media is there's so much amazing different types of content topics out there. There's something out there for everyone. Everyone has different interests. I'm not telling you what I'm not telling you that you have to be listening to personal development content. Not at all. Listen to content that you enjoy listening to. But I think a lot of the time we're not we don't realize that what we're being fed is stuff that we don't actually want. And I'm a big believer in let's choose what we're consuming rather than being fed it.
Speaker: and And that's what worries me about that kind of, you know, that constant never ending feed, feed of videos. So just be more conscious with your feed. And when something comes up in your feed that you don't like, like me with Conor McGregor, just flick past it as quick as you can.
Speaker: And when it comes to like following people, like following like your favorite influencer or whether it's like a beauty influencer, a fashion influencer, a fitness influencer, it doesn't really matter. and Or even it might just be a friend or an acquaintance or someone you know. But if you follow someone online, please just follow them. And it's OK to take inspiration from people, but please don't compare. it Like especially if we take fitness, for an example, and you're following someone, some coach or some fitness influencer and they're in in incredible shape.
Speaker: And you're comparing yourself to them, but you're only getting started on your journey. Like, don't compare your day 10 to her day 3000. That, you know, that's not a fair comparison. And, you know, if we all go around comparing ourselves to someone, but like there'll always be someone...
Speaker: Richer than us, prettier than us, thinner than us, younger than us, older than us, and happier than us, healthier than us. Like there's always someone who, inverted commas, is doing better than us.
Speaker: That's life. There's also a hell of a lot. If you look around, you open your eyes, you see what's going on in the world. There's a hell of a lot of people doing a hell of a lot worse than us.
Speaker: And at no fault of their own. There's a lot of very, very unpleasant things happening in the world, as most of us are aware, and that sometimes we need a little bit of a wake up call as well, I think, and to put things into perspective.
Speaker: One thing as well, particularly with Instagram, I think, I think Instagram is kind of going back the way it used to be when it was like, you know, photos and nice aesthetics. And, and you know, it's all about how something looks and people go on trips and they, you know, get to get the best Instagram posts or the best video clips for reels, like for B-roll for reels. And people can really put together a very idealistic,
Speaker: view of what what the experience has been and everything that we do in our ordinary lives feels like it's just not good enough. But what I want you to remember is healthy doesn't have a look.
Speaker: Beautiful doesn't have a look. Successful doesn't have a look. There is no one look for healthy, for beautiful, for successful. but they all have an energy. And that energy is all authenticity.
Speaker: That's confidence. And that's connecting inward, which I'm going to talk to you a little bit more about in a minute. And you can never get that energy by copying someone else or trying to be like someone else. The only way you can get that energy, that beauty energy, that healthy energy, that success energy is by connecting inward and being completely connected and happy with who you are and what you have to offer the world. That's what it's about.
Speaker: Now, I know I've talked about this before. I don't know if I've talked about it on the podcast, but do you know what the odds are of you being born as exactly you in this moment in time? and There's no exact science on this, but there has been calculations calculations done and the estimation of the odds of you being born as exactly you is one in four hundred trillion so you are not a mistake you are not here by chance you are here for a reason you as exactly you
Speaker: how you look And with all of your own individual personality traits, strengths, weaknesses, talents, likes, dislikes, that combination, there's like, there's no one has the same fingerprint as you and no one has that same combination of traits that in the exact quantities that you do. So you are here for a reason. We all are. And it is like ah my firm belief is that the whole purpose of life is for us to connect it inward and figure out what it is that we're here to do. And doesn't have to be grand. This is about how we live our day to day lives. And so one sure way to actually never achieve that is by comparing yourself to others.
Speaker: You don't we don't even know a fraction of what's going on for other people. We don't know how how their success feels. We don't know how their health is. We don't know how their finite family dynamics are.
Speaker: We are only seeing highlight reels. You know, people like to keep up appearances and we don't know what's really going on. We don't know how their physical health, their mental health, their family, their and their financial situation. We don't know about their fulfillment. We don't know how they feel deep within.
Speaker: OK, but the only thing you can know for sure is what feels right for you. And this is why the connecting inwards thing is so huge. And And the way into this, you can't think your way into this. OK, you can't over plan or over strategize or, you know, plan exactly how you're going to live out your purpose. And this is a very much follow your gut and follow your joy kind of thing. And it doesn't mean you have to.
Speaker: upend your life, you know, change your career, start living life completely differently. These are subtle little changes. It's letting go things that we're holding on tight to that just aren't right for us.
Speaker: Listening to our gut, following our joy, trusting the process and seeing what we actually draw into our lives as we start moving in a direction that as we start moving downstream with the river, rather than trying to go against the current of the river.
Speaker: you know what i mean? So if we're trying constantly trying to move upstream against the current, life always feels hard. Whereas if we can actually go with the flow, literally there's a saying, go with the flow. If we can go with the flow, like it should feel right when you're connected to yourself. And this goes back to the values episode that we talked about last year, last year, last week.
Speaker: and If you get, if you connect with your values, it feels right. But again, you can't overanalyze this and overthink this. You just have to get out there, start doing and figure things out.
Speaker: It's that good feeling. It's that spark that's inside you. i am And I have spoken about this already, but it is so important that you you start to connect inward with that. So from an intellectual level to be able to kind of as a starting place of where to go and what to start doing to see what feels right, because these can just be hobbies. This doesn't have to be you don't have to be working your passion. You know, a lot of us have financial responsibilities we've got life to live we've got bills to pay you know we're not going to just suddenly um turn our lives upside down and you know go live in a cave or anything like that we need you know we've got we've got to keep structure going in our lives as well but we can start finding our spark and when we start finding our spark little changes will happen over time it'll build momentum and before you know it you'll actually be living a life that you'll be like holy shit what the fuck happened
Speaker: This is amazing. And i've I've lived this. This started for me back in About 2015, like so we're talking about 11 years of just starting to read a bit about personal development, researching these ideas that were coming up, just constantly learning more about it, trying different things, opening up to connecting inward, stopping, stopping, caring what people think and just.
Speaker: doing what felt right for me. And when I found myself comparing myself to people, just catching myself doing that, i'd be like, OK, back to you, Kate, because it's not about the people around me. It's about me. It's when when it's about it is about the people around us as well as we contribute. But it's not about the people around us when we're comparing.
Speaker: It's like that's such a waste of energy. We're not comparing with the people around us. We're going inward. We're finding our spark. We're trying to feel our way to what feels right for us next.
Speaker: So finding your spark. Have a little think of these questions. What do I lose hours doing? What could you be doing? And then you're like, holy shit, four hours have gone by. What did you love to do as a child or as a teenager?
Speaker: What did you love to do before kids, before illness, before injury, before life happened to you? What brought you joy? Think back to any area of your life, any time in your life where you felt really in flow, really happy, really free. And did you last do something purely for joy?
Speaker: So the older we get and the more responsibilities we have, we tend to lose this one. When did you actually do something that you just did because you fucking wanted to? Because you love it.
Speaker: Has fear gotten away? Do you find yourself paralyzed by fear? Because I think as I'm asking these questions, you may be thinking you can think of these things that are coming to you and you're like, oh, there's no way I could do that now. and I'm too stiff. I'm too injured. I'm i'm too overweight. I'm and too old. i'm You know, there's all these things. But really.
Speaker: As we start to kind of move in the direction of what feels right for us, it's going to feel fucking scary, like it is going to feel scary. And. Imagine.
Speaker: If everything that you've ever wanted was on the other side of that fear. Because it is because that's that's what that's what's holding you back. That's what stops most of us is that fear.
Speaker: And we're comparing ourselves to others. But the people we're comparing ourselves with aren't afraid to be themselves. What are you so afraid of? And really being like, what is the worst thing that can happen if I go back to painting? If I go back to piano lessons?
Speaker: If I go and become a personal trainer? If I go back to education and become a nurse? If I, like, whatever it is, what are you afraid of? And what is the worst thing that can happen?
Speaker: Because unless you're planning on you know doing something that's particularly life threatening for most of our our hopes, are our dreams, our goals,
Speaker: They're quite ordinary things that will make us so extraordinarily happy. But we're so afraid because our brain doesn't know the difference between like catastrophic danger and just out of our comfort zones.
Speaker: So people talking about us, believe it or not, we we don't like we don't die. People talk about me all the time. And and some of you listening to this might be like, she is a fucking crazy bitch. And you know what?
Speaker: I'm being true to me. I don't care. And um you need to find your version of that because There's nothing worse than coming to the end of your life and having massive regret. And again, there's studies done on this where and people on their deathbeds have been interviewed and their biggest regrets are always not taking the leap, not doing the thing they always wanted to do, not...
Speaker: Spending enough time with family and going on adventures and, you know, spending too much spending too much time on things that don't matter, like comparing yourself, like. Trying to keep up with the Joneses, trying trying to chase more, more, more, more and more when sometimes it's like.
Speaker: Is the more that I'm chasing because I'm trying to keep up with everyone else or and I'm trying to I'm measuring myself of other people. Is it actually what I want? And but we got to get over that fear. We have to get over that fear of judgment, the fear of comparison, the fear of people talking about us, the fear. And remember, none of these need to be massive leaps. It's just taking baby steps in the direction where you want to go.
Speaker: So from today, what I want you to do is make yourself a promise. Okay. I want you to stop criticizing yourself. I want you to stop comparing yourself to others. I want you to stop berating yourself.
Speaker: It doesn't matter what has happened in your life up until now. What matters is every little moment that you take moving forward. So where we are now in our lives is the combination of everything we've thought and done up until now.
Speaker: But the future is a blank canvas and every thought that you choose Every action that you take, every decision that you make moving forward paints your future.
Speaker: And like I said, little baby steps, little changes. Go to the art class, get back dancing. Spend more time with your friends.
Speaker: to Start the business. Go to the gym class. Start exercising again. Start introducing healthy food into your diet. Whatever it is that it feels right for you to do right now, take that first step. What if you fail?
Speaker: It's part of the journey. You will. like But what if it took... 100 fails for you to create the life of your dreams. Wouldn't you be so excited every single time you failed because you'd be that bit closer? But by being stuck, that's what brings unbelievable unhappiness. And then we feed it by this constant comparison to others.
Speaker: So instead of the criticizing, the comparing and the berating yourself, I would love you to say, in those moments when, because it'll happen automatically, you'll you'll you'll catch, just start catching yourself doing it.
Speaker: And as you start to catch yourself, In that moment, say, what would bring me joy instead? What would bring me joy right now? And sometimes that might be a cup of tea and a fluffy blanket.
Speaker: That's Sometimes we're so go, go, go, push, push, push, build, build, build. That's like sometimes cuddling up with our dog and a a warm cup of tea is what we need in the moment. But we're so disconnected from ourselves and feeling like we we we can't just be. We're not human doings. We're human beings.
Speaker: So we need to be sometimes. we don't ah We're not measured by by what we do. And can you imagine how much the world economy would would collapse if everyone was just really, really happy with who they were, as they are,
Speaker: with the people that they have around them and the things that they have in their lives. And if everyone was really connected inward and really like connected with themselves and did what they wanted to do in life and contributed to the world, because I do believe we're here to contribute and make the world around us a better place. Anyone that we we happen to be in contact with and what we do through our work, through our interactions with others, through our hobbies, through the energy that we put out there.
Speaker: That's our contribution to make the world a better place. And we continue to connect inward to really get back to who we are. That's what we're here to do. But imagine if every everyone did that. There'd be like nobody would need to be buying all these things. Nobody like it it it would just it would turn the world upside down.
Speaker: And remember the same, just like with I was saying with social media, what you focus on grows. So the more shit you're watching, the more shit you're going to be fed, the more positive things that you're watching, the more constructive things that you're watching, the more of that that you'll be shown.
Speaker: It's the same in your life. What you focus on in your life will grow. So I think I said this in the last podcast as well. It's absolutely OK to be really grateful for what you have and also be able to visualize more for your life.
Speaker: That's OK, too. Our souls want to expand and grow. We are meant to grow. We are meant to move. We're not static beings. So it's OK to want to attract more things into your life. But it's more it's remember, it's more feelings.
Speaker: It's more experiences and the material things come when it's appropriate. So by focusing on your joy, you will attract more joyous things that are aligned with you into your life. And and life is not without problems. If you don't have problems, you're dead.
Speaker: There will always be problems. But the great thing about problems is they come and go and nothing is permanent. The joy isn't permanent. The sorrow isn't permanent. It is just this beautiful dance of both. And when we focus on things.
Speaker: Material things that don't matter so much. And like comparing ourselves to others and we focus on money and we focus on numbers and, you know, even lack of money and the stress of of paying the bills, which which is huge and for so many people.
Speaker: the As we focus on things like this constantly. And that doesn't mean that they don't need attention in our in our everyday lives. But we miss the magic in front of us of the children that we've created, the partner that we have, the beautiful nature outside. As I'm recording this, it's October and the colours in the trees are just absolutely incredible.
Speaker: And when you start to live like this, you realise you actually need very little to be OK. And everything else is a bonus that you can be extremely grateful for. So I've said this already. I'm going to say it again. Just remember that this is all baby steps. This is not like, oh, my God, I've listened to Kate's podcast.
Speaker: My whole life is changing now. This is one little step, one small step, one small change, one small decision, one small action. And then over time, these compound and they will have a massive impact on your life.
Speaker: So like, remember as well, you don't need to be the next Oprah or Richard Branson or the body coach or whatever. Like you just need to be you. You don't have to be rich and famous. You just have to be the true, authentic version of you that doesn't compare yourself to other people, that takes inspiration from others when if they really feel it and in their heart, in their gut.
Speaker: but creates their own version of growth, of success, of happiness and shares it with the people around them. That's what it's about.
Speaker: So I just want to finish this podcast on a note for you to really think about. That little spark that you hear me talk about in your gut, you know, that the butterflies, that feeling we feel in our stomach,
Speaker: That's your spark. OK, and the more you tune into that, the more you listen to it, the more you give it attention, the more it's going to shine. So please just be the light that you were born to be.
Speaker: We all have that spark. And when your spark is shining bright, you give everyone else around you permission to shine theirs.
Speaker: And the people that you feel drawn to, that's what they're doing. And that's why you're feeling that. So you don't need to be like them. You need to be like you. And it's just so simple.
Speaker: Thank you so much for listening. and I hope you got something from this episode. If you've made it this far, I hope you did. So if you found this helpful, please do share it with your friends, share it in your WhatsApp group, share it on your stories. If you do tag me at Kate Hamilton Health. i am If there's anyone in particular who you think needs to hear this, please do share it with them. The more sharing that happens, that the more listeners that we bring in. And if you aren't already, please do subscribe. to the podcast if you have time to leave a little review or a little comment that's always so much appreciated as well and if what I've been talking about in this episode has really resonated with you and you're like I need to do more work on this I have a free workbook for you so it is
Speaker: all about breaking through your mental blocks. The link for the free workbook is in the show notes. If you just click that, you'll be able to download it and you'll be able to really kind of zone in on what's holding you back on what your mental blocks are and how to overcome them. And I think that'll be really helpful. And if you'd like a little bit more and you would like to work with me, if you'd like, I am available to work with you on your health and fitness or on your business. So my health and fitness coaching is nourish her coaching.com.
Speaker: and my business mentorship is LeadHer. And links to both of those are also in the show notes. So you can check them out. You can apply. You can reach out. And thank you so much for listening. And I will see you on the next episode.
