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Cuz Chat 55 - Maimed
24 Plays2 months ago
The Cuzzies bring the pain this week. BM chatting with KM, JRD and MMRA about beaten up bodies and wallets.
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Transcript
Podcast Return & Introductions
00:00:37
Speaker
uh breathers welcome back to the cuss chat podcast you're here once again with black mickey and my cozies and returning back on the potty after a bit of a hiatus my bro welcome back there my bro poora yes karakia mitch is back in the whare what's up people churcher and also joining us this week from across the ditch
00:01:07
Speaker
George, the ruthless deception. Coming live from Cara, we see. Yep. The old fucking, the old booth. yeah Yep.
00:01:19
Speaker
so Good to catch up in a little while, eh? Yeah, it's been a bit long between drinks for sure. And also joining us from parts unknown, well, down the south side, ah the one, the only, macho man, Randy Average. Welcome to the potty.
00:01:33
Speaker
Yeah, we might leave that as parts unknown. I don't want people finding me and not really ah proud of my surroundings at some points. But, yeah, no, good to be back. Good to be here on the north side. Yeah, and we've got a good, well, hopefully got a good potty for you tonight.
00:01:45
Speaker
um Got a a few, well, I'm sure there's some poor form stories. There's been ah enough of a hiatus between our potties that there's bound to be some poor form ah to to share.
00:01:56
Speaker
We want to dig deep into some ah updates from our last potties as well, get into a bit of a Kindleys update. um We've got some bedroom bedroom performance critiques coming in. um
00:02:09
Speaker
And yeah, we've got some smart other things, but but we'll leave that for the rest of them. So how has everyone been travelling? ah Very much. You've been busy day today. Just made it back in time.
Mitch's Hectic Life & Work Humor
00:02:20
Speaker
Today, last week, the week before that, bro, it's been non-stop.
00:02:25
Speaker
Whether it's work, flying down to Adelaide or doing stuff with the kids, bro, basketball-wise. Had Te Ako's state championships down on Logan couple weeks back, first week the holidays.
00:02:40
Speaker
And then, like you said, Matty... Just got back from Bundy today for 50s basketball carnival. So, yeah, it never stops, bro. Some dedication there, bro.
00:02:50
Speaker
Yes. Does it... Because you have to be like, especially with two... You know, in such a close age as well. Do you have to be like a well-oiled machine sort of to get things going? Or do you just like keep everyone else out of the way?
00:03:06
Speaker
Keep everyone else out of the way while you get shit ready? on Just... Yeah, just the same as I do at work, bro. You keep a spare frog for my finger and it seems to work quite well.
00:03:19
Speaker
Frog for the finger. What's the colloquialism there? ah So on your tool belt, you know, you'll have frogs, holsters that hold your tools. I usually keep a kid one vacant, bro, for the finger so I can holster it when we I don't need to use it.
00:03:35
Speaker
Do you blow on well? Like a cowboy. Yeah, bro, that's it.
00:03:41
Speaker
Nice. ah Lord, how you are you travelling? Haven't seen hidden heard from you in a while, actually. Yeah, all good.
George's Birthday & Sunday Cup Evolution
00:03:49
Speaker
Like another ah the year around the sun on Friday.
00:03:53
Speaker
Yes. Went out for a bit of a bike ride and then few beers at home. Had to try to kick cunts out at about 2.30am, but they just kept drinking out on my fucking porch.
00:04:08
Speaker
yeah So yeah, it's hard to get rid of them. And ended up just going to bed and dropping them off in the morning. I've got a good host mate, good host. But you've been doing travelling quite a bit around the Mutui, here, there and everywhere.
00:04:25
Speaker
Yeah, around down, um obviously with went to Canada and then did Sunday Cup down in Christchurch a few weeks back. um That was busy weekend and yeah, outside of that, trying not to do much but yeah, been busy.
00:04:46
Speaker
Been busy. How do you run the admin for Sunday Cup? Because from what I understood, it was like just a thing you boys done in Toke and then now yous are travelling into Ireland. That's pretty high level.
00:04:59
Speaker
Yeah, well, so we did it in Toke maybe three, four years ago. um um Then after that, we did it it down in Queenstown.
00:05:12
Speaker
And then the year after that, we done it in Taupo. And then the year after that, we did it in Auckland. And now we're doing it, we did it in Christchurch. So it's just one yearly thing.
00:05:28
Speaker
You just do it once a year?
00:05:31
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah, once a year, bro. Sort of a mystery event if you can get the a stripper or ladies to come and present the trophy at the prize giving.
Expensive Mishaps & Career Highlights
00:05:44
Speaker
Which area has the best um presenters?
00:05:49
Speaker
Uh... Cross Church, actually, wasn't too bad. um Yeah, the the crack-up thing was that there was a stripper in there that actually recognised us from Queenstown.
00:06:02
Speaker
So... other o Yeah, starting to build up a bit of a reputation around those parts now. Who are you?
00:06:11
Speaker
The whole group, yeah. good reputation, bad reputation? um Will you purchase? don't know, it's a good reputation, boy but um yeah. Yeah, right.
00:06:25
Speaker
Any reputation. It'll be concerning if it starts happening across the ditch, you know, and you start building up reputation there as well. Yeah, well, what were the presenters like in Logan? They're much similar?
00:06:37
Speaker
Yeah.
00:06:43
Speaker
no None of those shenanigans happening down in Logan, I'll tell you that much. Well, not for us anyway. think it was hosted. We were sort of parked up at the 8 Mile Plains Holiday Village.
00:06:54
Speaker
Oh, bros, you know I live in Logan, eh? Just down the road from there. Oh, and still no call. Righto. bro. It didn't either. It was hectic. It was hectic. hectic Yeah, nah, I didn't even have time to stop and see Matty on the way back, bro. It was fucking...
00:07:10
Speaker
Four hands on deck sort of situation. You drove down a couple of days after Sky and them got here, eh? So Sky and them drove down on the Saturday, tried to hang back on the Monday for meeting and then flew down.
00:07:23
Speaker
Oh, yep, yep. And then, yeah, called Uber to to where we were staying and met up with them there and then carried on. think it was like drove back to Gladstone on the Thursday.
00:07:39
Speaker
Yeah, it's a big trip, eh? Yeah, no, it's full on, bro. And then i think I got back on Thursday, went to work Friday, and then Monday flew to Adelaide. Yeah, that's getting around too. few days.
00:07:52
Speaker
Yeah, been um doing it quite a bit lately, bro. It's been hectic. um you I think we touched on it a couple of bodies back about me stepping into a new role for for health and safety. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:08:03
Speaker
So is that all that travel's for
00:08:08
Speaker
airbo Yeah, bro, yeah, all these new tunnels going, ah starting in in Adelaide. um It's all, they're just scratching the surface at the moment, but we're sort of putting a presentation together to do a lot of the training and and safety stuff for that particular project. So all going well. We've got one more trip down there to present what we've got to offer in terms of um training facilities, sort of the...
00:08:36
Speaker
call it the courses that we can run all related back to the tunnel so um the main reason of us going down there is getting that little bit of uh local input um talking to the the aboriginal or the indigenous community down there yep uh the ghana people and getting them involved in
00:08:59
Speaker
and getting them to sort of back us into what we want to try and achieve down there. So it's been fucking full on, bro. Crucial these days, eh, to get the local peoples on board, all that sort of stuff.
00:09:15
Speaker
um Yeah, no, well, what about you, dear Macho Man, Randy Average? Are you travelling around bit? You've been... Oh, I had a bit going on. um Just finished about 18 months of study, like, a couple weeks ago, so pretty pretty stoked with that.
00:09:29
Speaker
Big weight off the shoulders there. um Was that specific job-specific? palm just Well, it does suit my job. um Well, yeah, 18 months ago I just found out that they were doing, like, fee-free diplomas through TAFE. Oh, yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. Just to, let's have a look into that and...
00:09:50
Speaker
Actually, a bit of a good score, actually, because I had a look into it, and I wanted to do business management, and um they had just exhausted all the spots for that. But the lady said, well, um you can be you can do a dual diploma, and you just pay for one of them.
00:10:06
Speaker
So I said, well, how much is that? She says $11,000. I'm like, what? Where's those free, free ones? And she goes, um but... um it's sort of leadership is cancelled out by the majority of the business ones so you only have to pay for one unit which is 900 bucks so I got 22 grand worth of fucking education for 900 bucks so that was quite good yeah that was magnificent yeah was a good score It's not a better score than my mower.
00:10:38
Speaker
yeah I think we could start a list of what's better than my mower. currently better than Lord's Mower. That's like ah the the Top Gun fastest lap track.
00:10:50
Speaker
Are you better than um George's Mower? I've got a question about the TAFE stuff. so you how How did you do it? Did you do it online or did you go in like a couple of days a week? or No, I did it did it all online. At the start, I was thinking, fuck, I really wanted to go in and do it so I can have a face-to-face convo and see the people around me.
00:11:12
Speaker
um Then I sort of seen the people that were in the groups and I'm like, fuck, i nothing I don't want anything to do with them. There was a lot of them that were just so far off where you sort of needed to be.
00:11:24
Speaker
But I was really lucky because I found these three other ladies that just wanted to form a group at the start and then we can do all their recordings and things like that. Oh, that's the way, yeah. Just a study group kind of thing. Yeah, every unit we had to do recordings of us holding meetings and stuff like that. And that was, at the start, that was quite confronting. But quickly get used to it.
00:11:47
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. And, yeah, so it was all 100% online and it was probably... 15 hours a week, which was pretty hectic with three kids. Yeah, Managing a business and, well, not an actual business, well, sort of as a business, but managing a department. Yeah, for a company, yeah.
00:12:04
Speaker
Yeah, because I wanted to do that as well, and I had a look at some of the courses that they had on there. And you're like, yeah, there are any sort of yeah specific ones that they'll do, but there was a one in cybersecurity that I was looking at, like a Cert 4 in cybersecurity, which that would have been worthwhile for a free course to do. but Yeah.
00:12:23
Speaker
Everyone's getting hacked these days. We just got hacked little ago. Yeah, man. Yeah, it's going be big, big soon. When I was in Toll, we got hacked twice, and the whole of Toll went offline for nearly a month, and, you know, it changed their future forever.
00:12:36
Speaker
Because that's the that's how they ransom people now these days, eh? They sold all their data, um withheld their own information from them, and rents and ransom it back to them. Like that H3 medicine one?
00:12:50
Speaker
What one? Ashley Madison? Oh, yeah, yeah, about the people cheating on their partners. Oh, yeah, they leaked all the names or something. Well, they were going to leak them or something. Would you be worried if they leaked your... or the information that they'd uploaded?
00:13:04
Speaker
Yeah. Would you be worried if they leaked your algorithm there, George?
Hacking Incidents & Humorous Mishaps
00:13:10
Speaker
Yeah, if your search history got out? My search history? Yeah. Oh, it's pretty quick, mate. You know, other than the odd board I've searched for the years.
00:13:23
Speaker
Pretty clean and maybe not legal search. I don't know. You never know what's illegal in your search at these days. Yeah, or who's looking at it? Who's been sold off to, i should probably say. George Topps did I get a good deal?
00:13:41
Speaker
Is this low mower a good deal? Top search result. i On the topics of bad deals, the old bro getting $15,000 lifted from out of the... yeah down the crosschurch was a pretty bad deal.
00:13:55
Speaker
I was going to mention that before we got into the AI rabbit hole, I was going to make mention how quickly off the topic of strippers that we went down, which is usually the other way around, how quickly you do go and into a topic like this with Cuz Chat.
00:14:10
Speaker
So, no, thank you, Lord, for bringing that back for our on full circle, bro. Please continue.
00:14:17
Speaker
Yeah, so as far as a bit of the tourists, just spending a bit of money in there, you know, we'll drop three or four grand, no worries. and he went in there. um Basically, he was making it rain out on the um a stage there, but didn't realise they were all $5.
00:14:37
Speaker
They were only giving the the money at $5, so he spent a lot money doing that, and then basically got thought he was going back to the mansion, the Calendary Guild mansion.
00:14:50
Speaker
It turned out It was the apartments. But he took two girls back there for four hours at 1,500 per hour per girl.
00:15:05
Speaker
What? Yeah. And they just watched reruns of Home and Away.
00:15:12
Speaker
Wait, is that code for something else? I don't know Or was it a legit reruns of Home and Away? Yeah, no, that's what he was up to.
00:15:23
Speaker
Legit? probably he He thought he only spent nine grand. was like, then they may actually told us the next night. You know, he spent 15 all up. So, yeah, got to keep your wits about you places like that.
00:15:39
Speaker
Some might say he deserves that. Yeah, he could buy 15 grand. Could have got those two paid courses, that's for sure. ah ze couldve got those pinca courses thats for sure You could have diploma of business management. And and a decent mower. I'm going to go with two.
00:15:56
Speaker
What's your trade, Jordan? What's your trade called?
00:16:01
Speaker
What's the what? What's your trade? Oh, my trade. answer I just want to know what my kids should get into because fucking it sounds like you guys got a lot of fucking money, eh?
00:16:12
Speaker
Inter-Island Sunday camping. He's plumber this month. Oh, there you say well. tell my kids go clean shit up. He's about five foot. Does that affect his money?
00:16:24
Speaker
So, yeah, that's why the price went up. Did the price go up or down? Did they like, you well... That's why he's so eagerly swindled by a woman, bro. Oh, yeah. Is he not picking up a lot of chicks when you're that tall?
00:16:36
Speaker
I just need to cater to his ego, you know, get him exactly where they want him and then just start laying into those home and away episodes. Oh, you're such a big boy. I suppose it goes a bit further with him, eh? Yeah.
00:16:47
Speaker
That's exactly what he wants to hear. Yeah. Tell me I'm tall. Tell me I'm tall. He made two withdrawals of six grand. Fuck. Jesus.
00:16:58
Speaker
One of you is dropping those um red versus blue ad-libs, you know. I've come to lay some pipe. Boucher, bow wow. did anybody call for a hairy plumber aboutchi Bow chicka bow wow
00:17:12
Speaker
ah They've come they come back eh Red vs Blue is back They went away for a while Or the company that that Created that Anyway I think If anyone's looking to To hear about What we're talking about I'm pretty sure It's episode 57 Right at the very end Red vs Blue Just watch them all They're fucking great
00:17:33
Speaker
But yeah, okay, so yeah, that's that's probably not a good deal, the old 1500 a pop, just to watch not even new episodes of Home In Away reruns. So you know what's going to happen. Well, can you think of the one with all the Māoris on it?
00:17:48
Speaker
I mean, how many scaffolders are you going to get for that, Mitch? Four hours of scaffolding? Mm-hmm. Or, you know. Yeah, that's that at least eight men for a 10-hour day. That's, you know, quite a bit of scaffolding.
00:18:03
Speaker
put up I'll say that like bit you'd be able to scaffold what sort building at that point um that's a two story house 15 oh yeah it's a fully scaffolded a two story house 15 grand that's a weird conversion you're going to have to start doing then scaffolding to how many episodes to how many how many loads to gladstone can I get miles for 15 grand Of scaffold. Oh, I was going say, is that euthamism as well? Because know some people who can get it for cheaper. um
00:18:39
Speaker
For me, we charge of about a hundred an hour. We're quite cheap. um So that that's two dudes for a full day, including Smoko.
00:18:52
Speaker
So if, what you want? You won't even reach around. do you want, a girl for an hour or two dudes for a full day? Fuck, you get more done with two dudes. Yeah, fuck it, eh? We know who's going to get some more work done.
00:19:05
Speaker
Yeah, 100%. Especially especially if you're not indulging in what you wanted to in the first place. Well, which kind of segues nicely to to two things which I wanted to bring up.
00:19:17
Speaker
Well, one thing really, which is your bedroom performance. Oh, yeah, thanks. But I don't know, there was a thing on Kaz Chat a little while ago about skimpies. um and I just wanted to know, sort of tie that into this conversation, what um
00:19:33
Speaker
That'd be a cheaper ah option for sure, Skimpies Tuesday Bears. um with is it Is the name of the venue called Skimpies? Nah, that's just the Aussie Sane, eh?
00:19:45
Speaker
Is it just the the topless bars, just what they call them? Just the Aussie Sane. I haven't been to one of those things for a long time. It's probably since I was living in Sydney. I've heard about them. I haven't frequented one myself, though. A few cuzsies that listen to Indulge, I see.
00:20:02
Speaker
Yes. yeah I think there's one out in Pinkenbar. Alex used to tell me that. hey He'd go there. done There is one in Pinkenbar. Literally, yes. allegedly well Literally down the road from work.
00:20:20
Speaker
Do they know you're by your first name there? No, well, I think they don't do it anymore. It used to be called The Pink, but now it's called Trade Coast Hotel. so Okay, well, it doesn't really scream topless bars. No, it doesn't. up The Pink is a good name, but... Allegedly, they're the place to lift you without a collared shirt, you know?
00:20:38
Speaker
Or a shirt at all for some people.
00:20:43
Speaker
um So, yeah, we had few topics here, and and so we might as well sort of get through those, um building on what foundation we've laid already.
Bedroom Performance & Humorous Texts
00:20:53
Speaker
So there was, i don't know, was there some critique?
00:20:56
Speaker
Yeah, well, I've got to be a little bit careful. Give us the context. I've got to be a little bit careful. I sort of was going through an area where, um I'd say I had a fan.
00:21:12
Speaker
had a fan. That works well. and um An enthusiast. Yeah, an enthusiast. An enthusiast of what we get up to at night time, I suppose.
00:21:24
Speaker
and The way you operate. Yeah, yeah, see? And my my PPM. If you go back to earlier episodes. Yes. Pumps for a minute. Oh, I feel real bad about that because I know going to listen to this.
00:21:38
Speaker
But... um Yeah, yeah, so this particular person was was quite a fan to the point where I turn up unannounced.
00:21:49
Speaker
And... um
00:21:52
Speaker
I was, I'll tell, you know, one of the one of my mates, as well one of my close mates at work, ah you know, oh, so-and-so, blah, blah, this and that's going on. And he's like, wow, bro, you must be running a baby army.
00:22:03
Speaker
And then, ah you know, mentioned it to, you know, another person. that like, bro, you must be slaying it in the sack, you know. So, you know, the giving me the old Bob the Build-Ups. and um And then i was at work and get a phone call and it's the mother of my children rings me up and they're talking something about the kids and that. And me and her, we support each other um really well through through our separation and stuff.
00:22:27
Speaker
And um probably sometimes too much, but whatever. You know, it's better than swinging too far the other way, which is great. Yeah, right. That sounds good. It's healthy. Yeah. Yeah, to the point where ah we ask each other, like, how you going in that sort of area?
00:22:41
Speaker
And I said, ah and I mentioned it, was just like, ah sort of struggling to get a little bit of a space at the moment. And um so she's gone and said, oh, she must have just seen how good of a provider you were.
00:22:56
Speaker
And it just instantly floored me. Everyone around me is saying, jeez, he must be great in the sack. And this person, the only one actually knows, can actually rank me, has pretty much flat out said, yeah, it's the provider. It's the provider part.
00:23:12
Speaker
Man, you've got a big heart. Yeah, yeah. It's just one of those ones. If I could drop I was just like, oh, well, I thought I was the man before. A little bit of... A little bit of mango magic. Yeah.
00:23:25
Speaker
Rarely delivering in the pantry. Oh, once or twice. It's a better deal than Lord's Mower. I put out and he provides me.
00:23:42
Speaker
and it It was actually quite good. So it became bit of a laugh at the workshop because I thought it was hilarious as fucking, you know, it doesn't matter if I'm the butt of the joke. um um If it's funny, I'm going to tell everybody I can because to me, I'm just all about spreading the laugh, you know.
00:23:57
Speaker
And then, um so i tell my boss and that, my boss is, he's a he's proper good cunt, proper good cunt. And I tell him, And it becomes the running joke.
00:24:08
Speaker
And i don't know how we got into this conversation. I think oh he was texting me about something. and um' and nice And I replied saying, must be because I'm such a good provider. And he must have got it in his head. Or maybe he just likes me that much. So he's just like, I need to give this guy back some positive feedback.
00:24:24
Speaker
A feedback sandwich. And he's texted me straight back. And he said, I think you are not fully comprehending Oh, this is his exec text. I think what you are not fully comprehending is that you're an absolute incredible provider, so you're way better than average lovemaking skills.
00:24:44
Speaker
Just get left out of the conversation. And this is our national manager giving me feedback on my bedroom performance. You know, so swings and roundabouts, ups and downs, but I bet you your boss has never said anything that good about you.
00:25:01
Speaker
I don't think I'd get that close to my boss to have those conversations, to be honest. That's just me, though. was going to link that to something. I've forgotten it now.
00:25:12
Speaker
Anyone else got anything to add? Some feedback to give Miles there? In regards to someone sort of turning up unannounced, because they're still dealing with that problem, because i mean that's something that probably still could be addressed.
00:25:31
Speaker
Oh, fuck, I hope she doesn't listen to this.
00:25:35
Speaker
Allegedly. Allegedly.
00:25:40
Speaker
He sounds in quite bit of pain here. There's just a lot of heavy breathing going on in size. and Like I said, man, if it's good convo, it'll come out, but Jesus.
00:25:55
Speaker
Let's not dwell on the negative then. You're a good provider. Yeah.
00:26:00
Speaker
Above average? First only to your performance. No, he said above average. Above average. I'll take that. Mate, that's high praise. Better than average lovemaking. Oh, you know, so I'm going with that.
00:26:13
Speaker
Yeah. So spread the word. What's for the PPMs? PPMs? Well, wasn't recording, but... Oh, was I? No, I wasn't recording, but um fuck, she's up there. She's up there. I got some, actually, I got some pretty high RPM, actually, I'd say.
00:26:30
Speaker
The RPM's pretty good. The limiter is like a spoon engine hitting 10,000. You go to the gym lately too, so, you know, we're we're redlining it quite often.
00:26:43
Speaker
ah You know what I actually was thinking just recently is... Like, it wouldn't be a bad idea to just break those sort of after-hours activities up into like a three or five round sort of, you know, you go for your five minutes and then 30-second break, you know?
00:27:06
Speaker
And if you know make those championship rounds or whatever, your round four or five, like, you know, like UFC round. This ties into, think, what I was going to say before is that and casual sex implies that there's competitive and ranked sex.
00:27:22
Speaker
Ooh. o This is what you're talking about. Exactly. Competitive and ranked six as opposed to casual. Well, sometimes it'll be good. Sometimes you could just get saved by the bell, you know? Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. You're going to fucking deepen a submission.
00:27:40
Speaker
You're messing up my combos. My combos. He's choking him out. You just get that 30-second breather where I just sit down on the chair. If someone fucking... The PPMs too high. fucking ran that They're not going to reach the asphyxiation stage. can you run a corner man in this scenario?
00:28:00
Speaker
Throw in the towel. If you wanted to, you know. We've got to cut. Hey, well, this is yeah ranked competitive sex, mate. You need to get yeah performance.
00:28:11
Speaker
and if those do Some dudes, i e yeah, they're only a three-rounder, three-rounder, you know. They only make three rounds. and take to eat Also, like old Bam Bam two-rounder. he's He's a bit of a three-rounder.
00:28:25
Speaker
Do you reckon you should be able to get it done within that time, though, that, you know, 15, 25 minutes? Yes. Oh, yeah, I reckon nine minutes. ah ah from And I'm not saying you should cut it off, but ah if yeah if you haven't been able to reach a satisfactory point, um what are you doing?
00:28:48
Speaker
Yeah, definitely and the the rounds can be longer and the satisfaction can continue for longer, but... If you haven't haven't reached the satisfactory level in nine minutes... I think we've touched on this before, actually. So by round two.
00:29:07
Speaker
Yeah. It sounds like drive thing that sounds like George is trying to get a baseline to performance expectations. yeah
00:29:20
Speaker
oh There's got to be. Yeah, I mean, it's good sometimes to get a report back, you know, are we you know how'd you go? Yeah, now I've got the finish in round two or, you know, whatever. is In the UFC, but if you come out flying, kids it's ah's it's applauded.
00:29:40
Speaker
The speed of which you can. it the same situation in rank six? Yeah. ah Wow, what is the goal? If you get finished, bro, that's the thing. If you get finished, then if you come out flying and then get finished, it's probably not that good, bro. Yeah, maybe you have to get a bit of synchronicity going, eh? A bit of pairing. But if you come out flying and you get the finish early, bro, that's not bad. you know That's pretty good.
00:30:07
Speaker
I've had some great advice in my life, and um probably one of the one of the greatest pieces of advice I've ever received was from... our friend, I don't know, what do you call him?
00:30:20
Speaker
The Shadow. I'm from Indikagel. No, no, The Shadow. Toast, AJ Marataka. And he told me, and and i've always remembered this, and i apply it to nearly everything I do, um was sex is a race.
00:30:34
Speaker
Whoever comes first wins, and nobody likes to see loser. and I'm like yeah not bad bros not bad you know builds you up and it shuts it down yep he's a unique individual hey um can you get fight of the night do you get a fight of the night bonus get a bonus 15 grand bonus
00:31:00
Speaker
And a cameo on Home and Away. Yeah. Amateur section, you progress throughout the night. Yeah. Yeah, well, the other thing is, can you miss weight?
00:31:15
Speaker
I'm super heavy. so Well, well as what is weight dictated on? You know, are we going by Lurth? by by girth, length by girth, or um just by an overall kg, you know?
00:31:30
Speaker
It's a heavyweight, the dude with ah with the biggest dong on him. I'm sure i'm sure ah someone has already spent the time to think about it. Wouldn't that come under reach?
00:31:41
Speaker
But I reckon there's, ah you know, on your phone, you can get a sleep score when you're asleep. There's got to be an app that can they can measure this stuff. While you're dedouching. There's your bus score. Yeah.
00:31:52
Speaker
That's good, that's good, bro, yeah. There's an idea. Yeah. There's an odd idea, bro. Well, I think if we are school if we're talking about competitive and ranked sex, then that girl that did 900 dudes recently is probably winning.
00:32:08
Speaker
What's her name? Bonnie, eh? Yeah, how many of them got off, you know? All of them, apparently. Oh, really? Apparently there were seven dudes left over after, it 900 or 1,000?
00:32:18
Speaker
Because I watching an interview with her and she was just like, yeah, there was guys waiting outside as well, so I couldn't just let them, they'd been waiting for so long, so we actually, I went seven over the, what the tally was meant to be.
00:32:30
Speaker
That'd be like a fucking Tomo, eh, when she finished. back Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Sloppy. Oh, it's just, it wouldn't be, yeah. Barely human.
00:32:44
Speaker
Yeah, it'd be barely human. Yeah. Be like that thing that dropped over Roswell in the Fuck this.
00:32:53
Speaker
this
00:32:56
Speaker
Yeah, good good chat that one, bedroom performance. Been down a bit of a hole there. turned into something. Let's redeem ourselves with some intelligent conversation.
Kinleith Shutdown & Poor Form Stories
00:33:07
Speaker
ah whats What's the latest with Kinleaf there, Kazzy? Lord, what can you tell us? um All I know about the latest on that is that, it's um yeah, she's, one half of it's getting shut down in two months, pretty much.
00:33:23
Speaker
ah End of June, I believe. And, yeah, there's still talk of the rest of it shutting down in a couple more years. So not really much else is developing outside of, I think they do, they've but they've they've sort of come back with the restructure numbers, who's in, who's out.
00:33:42
Speaker
um But, yeah. Yeah, that's all I really know. I don't, you know, get a hell of a lot of it inside word. Because I think the last time we spoke about it was more of a, that the buyout was happening.
00:33:54
Speaker
Um, and no one was really sure what was happening. So the, because I think the guts of it was that they were, it was cheaper to produce all that stuff elsewhere. So they were gonna, they bought it to basically either relocate or just shut it down.
00:34:09
Speaker
Just shut it down. there Yeah. Yeah. Um, yeah. So they are still making the pulp, but the paper machine's gone. Um,
00:34:21
Speaker
Yeah, so people are looking for work. few people are going Aussie, I believe.
00:34:27
Speaker
I think a lot of people probably going to look to geothermal plants and stuff like that to go work. i Yeah, they'll be finding people without jobs, I think. Because there is a bit that work, the geothermal.
00:34:41
Speaker
Because when I was heading back here, there was a lot of talk about those contracts coming up now for all was it Temihi and stuff like that, all the new plants and that are going up? Yeah.
00:34:53
Speaker
Geothermal plants. Yeah. There's a lot of people getting contracts for that and then they'll pick up workers there. Hopefully some of the Kinleaf boys will get on that.
00:35:02
Speaker
Yeah, there's always working, you know, for people that want, but yeah. There'll be those people that are sort of like on almost at their retirement age and stuff, but yeah. Yeah, guess, yeah.
00:35:15
Speaker
Oh, there's your Kinleaf update. um Any other local updates you want to share? Before we get into your overseas update? Yeah, well I went to Regan's 21st the other weekend. there was That was nice. That was cool. We had a nice tattoo that had been made for him.
00:35:34
Speaker
Oh, nice. oh Yeah, you feel old going to now? ah do anyway. What about you fellas? Yeah, went to one about a month ago for my son's mate.
00:35:48
Speaker
Yeah, it was pretty much just out of the corner of the It was like, what the hell? Regan's would have been a big one, though, eh? It wasn't actually massive. There wasn't heaps of people there.
00:35:59
Speaker
um They just sort of had a hall out, um sort of Hickling Park, over the back of where the league hall is. Oh, where the men's shed or the darts club is?
00:36:10
Speaker
That one? In Topol? Yeah, it might be the men's shed. Yeah, it sort of looks um over the fields anyway. Yeah, right yeah.
00:36:22
Speaker
Cool, and theyre they're all well? All the fun as well? Yeah, it was good night. I sort of shot back about one o'clock.
00:36:31
Speaker
Left them all in town. So... But we'll give those shout-outs to Riggs then. Happy birthday, Riggs. Rosa had a birthday this month as well, April.
00:36:42
Speaker
Yep. And then we also have Jordan Rodders that had a birthday on the 25th. Happy birthday, Cuzzies. Yeah, cheers, Cuzzies.
00:36:56
Speaker
Yes. Another year without being a statistic. I love it. I believe it would have also been Grandad McGee's... um Birthday at some point in April?
00:37:08
Speaker
Yeah. I'll have to check that one. ah yeah We haven't done birthdays for quite a while, so add a little bit there. Can you Google that one? Might have his death.
00:37:21
Speaker
Might not have his.
00:37:24
Speaker
The old man did tell me the other what day it was. always thought it was a 30th, but I don't think it is. I think it's like or something. Yeah, I think back in the day they didn't really give a shit about birthdays. they like My nan was telling us her birthday on this day for years and they didn't find out until a couple of years before she died. It actually wasn't.
00:37:41
Speaker
But she didn't know. Well, they probably didn't know either. She probably just picked a day that was yeah easy to remember.
00:37:50
Speaker
Yeah, that was quite common, I think, back in the day. Yeah. Like, I'll be picking all the public holidays then. You know, you give the day off, eh?
00:38:02
Speaker
Yeah, um you had a an incident I think you wanted to share, Lord, when you were overseas. um Yeah. We'll get into that and then we can share poor form stories if you like.
00:38:18
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, well, this is a poor form story to be fair. um Yeah, we were in Canada. We'd sort of hired camper van.
00:38:29
Speaker
to travel around and snowboard in a few different spots. Pretty cool. We've done a few different, um, a bit of back country stuff, uh, some split boarding. don't know if you guys have ever heard of that.
00:38:41
Speaker
Um, mad but yeah, we'd sort of been for a few places and done quite a lot of driving, um, through some blizzards and all on the other side of the road. Um,
00:38:53
Speaker
But we were in Revelstoke for our last night, and were like, oh, we'll go for a couple of beers in town before we head back to the RV park. And so we're playing like that. They a game there. It's like Texas Hold'em poker.
00:39:08
Speaker
You go to basically the TAB machine, and you can grab yourself out two cards, same as you would in Texas Hold'em. And then there'll be a screen that comes up and there's like six players on, you know, computer generated players up on the on the screen.
00:39:25
Speaker
And you basically have to try and beat their hand or get the best hand. um And if no one sort of wins it on that, they take the highest in the region, the best hand in the region for whoever else is playing.
00:39:41
Speaker
It's quite crack up, you know, if you if you get the best hand, then they'll come up and say, oh, from this from this place and you'll know it's you or whatever. but Anyway, we had about five or six beers, you know, and my mate got into the RV and we pulled out onto the road. It was probably 10 o'clock at night.
00:40:03
Speaker
And I thought, man, you're never be going to get pulled over in a camper van like this, you know. Pretty much just as that thought was going through my head, lights and sirens come on behind us, you know, the classic.
00:40:17
Speaker
And, um yeah, i they pulled us over because our outside light was on on the camper van. And while they're at it, they fucking breath-alised my mate, and he ended up blowing over their top limit.
00:40:34
Speaker
So they impounded our RV for 30 And Yeah We're pretty much fucked Oh Yeah So how long did it take How long did all this take Sort of from when you got pulled over To Like Probably about an hour Yeah i did The Snapchats I sent Were pretty Pretty much the The length of it Yeah right Yeah so Yeah they um
00:41:08
Speaker
They were pretty good about it I offered them some bacon out of my fridge, but they said they don't eat their own kind.
00:41:19
Speaker
Rufus.
00:41:22
Speaker
so Was Canadian bacon? Yeah, they checked up into the Super 8 Motel. Maple bacon? and ah Yeah, i think it was maple bacon. Excellent. Yeah.
00:41:34
Speaker
But, yeah, bit of poor form there. don't want to be doing that overseas. Did it cost you anything? Or did it just, like... Well, I got a 500 buck fine, but we actually didn't pay it because we just fled the country after that.
00:41:49
Speaker
Excellent. But what about, like, the the RV getting impounded for 30 days? were there any ongoing costs? Well, quite possibly. don't know. Again, fled the country.
00:42:04
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah.
00:42:07
Speaker
We told them it was there, you know. Yeah, that's the rentals problem now, eh? Oh, sweet, it's all sorted. It's in the impound. You're the problem now. You're about nine hours away from where we picked it up from.
00:42:21
Speaker
like won't be going back to Canada anytime soon, think. Well, I can. He won't be, yeah. I've got no idea who I was, you know. ah they're probably not fans of the podcast then, I suppose.
00:42:36
Speaker
still Yeah, no, I wouldn't say. Might be unlikely. Wishful thinking. I don't think we've quite reached Canada yet. No, I think we had a listener in Romania, but I don't know how legit that is.
00:42:47
Speaker
Romania, Invercaro. I've got a Canadian mate that listens to the potty and whether he takes it back home or not. Shout out to all the overseas listeners that are listening to the potty then.
00:42:59
Speaker
Yeah. Appreciate it. Drop us a like, send us an email, cuzchatpodcast.gmail.com. That's cuzchatpodcast.gmail.com. um Poor form stories, though.
00:43:11
Speaker
think Mitch has got a doozy for us this week. Actually, I'll do my one first because it's short. i I don't think it's going to top yours, Mitch. um So this is actually not my poor form. It's my young fella's poor form, but it's a reoccurring poor form. So it's just building off ah an existing poor form.
00:43:28
Speaker
So years and years, or not years ago, a few years ago, He dislocated his shoulder and at school in a rugby game. So since then, he's dislocated it again on a slip and slide.
00:43:40
Speaker
um And then about a month ago, he's dislocated it again. This most recent one, though, is probably, yeah, the poor form um ranking, where he's, I've got a phone call at 6 o'clock in the morning,
00:43:57
Speaker
I was like, what's he ringing me for? He's in the fucking room down the you know other end of the house. And he's like, oh, can you come into my room? I'm like, what's going on? Where are you? I'm just somewhere, I need you to come in here now.
00:44:10
Speaker
was like, what's going on? I was like, I've dislocated my shoulder. So I go in there and he's lying on his back and he's just like in a bit of pain and lying there. like, bro, what happened? He goes, oh, I just woke up.
00:44:23
Speaker
he was lying face first on his, with his arm, out above his head and his head resting on his shoulder and he got a jolt and must have jolted himself awake and that motion of pushing against the bed with his hand and pushing himself back has popped his shoulder out.
00:44:40
Speaker
So, yeah, poor form for just popping the shoulder out, just waking up in the morning. Sounds like a likely story. Yeah, yeah, that's what I'm thinking, bro. Oh, yeah, just way tough. Well,
00:44:53
Speaker
He was face down though. He's face down. is He's a big dude. So he's carrying a lot of that. Head would have been at least probably five, six kgs. If I checked that up on his phone, you know he might have been in round two.
00:45:05
Speaker
Might have been trying to rank up.
00:45:10
Speaker
How many steps were on his... Six in the morning's hit 8,000. 150 steps. Sorry, boy, if you do listen to this one. Didn't quite know it was going to go that way.
00:45:31
Speaker
course the old saying, hey bro, to keep your form on fleek, you'll be able to critique, and you will be judged. Yeah, so it was another fucking like four hours before we got seen by the doctor and got it back in, and been in the sling for months now.
00:45:48
Speaker
So anyway, yeah, he won't be... yeah He won't be ranked competition anymore. He's taking a break. Dropped out of the rankings. He's injured.
00:46:01
Speaker
Taking a sabbatical. That's the thing about dislocating shoulders and stuff like that. i like That shit will never be the same. Yeah, he's got to go. He's went for an x-ray just to check if there's anything floating around in there. That shouldn't be.
00:46:13
Speaker
And then he's got physio on Tuesday. So, yeah, we'll start getting that back into into shape. I've done it once back in the old rugby days in death and it's never been the same, eh? Even just at the gym today, just doing some lightweights, you feel it, like it always feels like it's like on the verge.
00:46:34
Speaker
Yeah. It's not a great feeling. No. So, yeah fucking that's his yeah, that was the end of his rugby career when he did that. and That four hour wait to the hospital is always the worst about thing about any injury. a Like, fuck.
00:46:49
Speaker
When's AI going to sort that out at home? That'd be sweet. Well, the doctor did sort of say, he goes, oh, if it happens again, this is sort of how, and he kind of showed me the little technique that he was using to try and pop a pack in.
00:47:01
Speaker
Don't worry, doc, I'll be back. I'll give it a go, but if you start screaming, I'll just get in the car, mate. My worst weight was when I dislocated it, and it it was okay. I ended up driving home that night.
00:47:14
Speaker
Yeah, because it went back in. And then overnight, you know, once the adrenaline wears off and everything like that, I was sitting there, couldn't even breathe because just the weight of, the movement on my chest was upsetting it and it was just fucked. It was back in by this point, but I was in so much pain.
00:47:29
Speaker
And then so i just sat on the couch till the sun came up and then Uncle Jimmy comes out and i was, Uncle, can you drop me off to the hospital? Oh, what's matter? And I told him, he's going, oh, yep, yep, sweet ass. Just going to make some bacon and eggs, boy. And I'm just like, I've been like struggling to breathe the whole night. Yeah. Oh, you want to go now?
00:47:46
Speaker
I was like Come on man Did he at least offer you some? No he just said Oh hop in the car then I was like I shouldn't hop on your banshee Oh yeah poor form there the old boy But nah he's alright now um But yeah It's good parenting on my part To you know be there for for in his ah moment of crisis Mitch what was your story about? No Well, as we sort of alluded to in the Cuzz chat, it's a mixture, a trifecta of sorts.
00:48:21
Speaker
um We got poor form, we got bad parenting, and we got always keeping your kids on edge. Showing them who's boss. So, in regards to that last one, you know, exactly.
00:48:35
Speaker
Well, Tiako frequently reminds me, now that he's taller than me, you know, he always comes up to me and like, what do you do little boy? He does little things like that, you know, he gets in my ear and fucking fucks me off and then we'll have a little sparring session and whatever and then I'll sit him on his ass and I'll carry on with my day.
00:48:50
Speaker
This particular day, I'd just gotten home from work, bro, and he was just straight into me.
00:48:58
Speaker
called me short. in there too and um i was just that enough so i went in and he sort of shaped up and i sort of ducked around him bro bang got him in a headlock but i didn't realize how much tension he was actually putting on my arm bro so you know he's stiffened right up and i've just got him in a headlock i've like come down and then stitched it and just fucking reefed up on him Second I'd done that, bro, his whole body just went limp and he just collapsed into me.
00:49:28
Speaker
And I thought he was taking the piss, bro, but I guided him down so he didn't bang his head on the cupboard or on the tiles and that. And sort of, like, got him down and was cracking up laughing. I was like, kareateke. And I looked at him, bro, and his eyes were wide open. He had his tongue out to the side. Flying on the ground full-on snoring, bro. That's when I fucking realised, shit, I've choked this boy out.
00:49:48
Speaker
And, um...
00:49:52
Speaker
I could start to freak out a little bit, you know, i was giving him couple of slaps on the side of his cheek. um good i could ah good How long was he out for?
00:50:03
Speaker
It felt like an eternity, bro, but it would have only been like 10 seconds at the max, you know, you had probably enough time to get in four good snores. And his missus was there too. She was cracking up laughing.
00:50:15
Speaker
And Fitzy... And Fitzy was there. Did he get some kicks in while he was down, bro? Yeah, bro. See, like, Fitzy was cracking up laughing. Olive, Taoko's missus, she was cracking up laughing until we sort of realised what was going on. oh shit.
00:50:31
Speaker
And then when he did come to, bro, he sort of, like, spaced out a little bit and looked at me and goes, I'm hungry. no you fucking a little week totally discombodulated though I though, eh?
00:50:45
Speaker
Yeah, and um a kid he kept on, he was nah, nah, I was just kidding, Dad. was just kidding. I was like, you're fucking kidding, bro. ah You were choked out. So now that that that happened, you know, and if he tries it again, i was like, I choked you out last time, next time i' knock you out. And it sort of gets him to, he backs off then.
00:51:03
Speaker
But um yes, I'll ask the same question that Miles started the podcast with, you know, about has any of your bosses done that?
00:51:14
Speaker
Have any the kids? There's probably a few. Let's let's let it's not fucking lie. Definitely. At least in our cousin group. I'm sure I'm not the only one that's choked out there, son. ah think Well, I think maiming children as general in general is is quite common in our family.
00:51:30
Speaker
Just through, you know... Just general play, really. And it's, yeah, it's never like, it's never, is it, what's the word? Malicious. good fucking It's not intended it to be harmful. There's no malice behind it, eh? It's always playful, but someone always gets hurt. Remember playing league at Aunty Shona's though? There was a lot of malice there, into the hedge or onto the manhole.
00:51:54
Speaker
There's plenty of millers. Yeah, there are few. I'm pretty sure we used to just get rung up so we can go get a hiding. Oh, there's a few times that yeah, put the cuzzies through some shit.
00:52:04
Speaker
They'll be like, oh, yeah, let's go get old Dunywise because they got no dad. Let's fuck them up. You know, let's fuck them. A certain next door neighbours. For 100% Barry Farmer was rung up for those instances, you know.
00:52:17
Speaker
Oh, it i was good the times, though. Yeah, they used to tie us to the back of cars and stuff. Well, you know, build character. Oh, it was mean as, eh? Yeah, you were right, because were out of Whakamaru, you weren't as easily accessible. I remember, yeah.
00:52:35
Speaker
just I think the games of Bull Rush we used to have was at Nanny's house, though. Nanny Way's place, yeah, down the side of the house there. When you have seven uncles, you know, they they want to fucking take it out on you.
00:52:47
Speaker
I guess 100%. grew up with Lyle and Brett. Yep. So I was there. I was their whipping boy, for sure. And, Matty, you can confirm this. When we stayed at Waikare, I think the worst thing I'd done to my kids up until that point was playing cricket. You know, just put a backyard cricket and almost knocked Whiti out.
00:53:09
Speaker
Just physically dominated the space. And, yeah, I've come from one direction, Whiti's come from the other, and we've just met in the middle. yeah And he absolutely snotted him, bro. Eight-year-old or something like that? Eight or nine? Eight or nine, yeah, bro.
00:53:26
Speaker
And i was I was full steam, fucking 110 kegs.
00:53:33
Speaker
spirit and they dominating the space. I'm going to show this podcast to my kids. I'm going to skip quite a large part. I'm going to show this particular part to my kids. See, now I don't have to bash you because, you know, Mitch has told us that this is what happens.
00:53:50
Speaker
Yes. and I'll just start employing my services for the countries out there. They want their kids choked out. Mitch's muscle. Yeah. welcome Once a choke's locked in, they reckon seven seconds, eh?
00:54:04
Speaker
Seven seconds before you go out. Yeah. Oh, yeah. There's a lot of time to change your options there, Mitch, and you didn't. Seems a long time.
00:54:18
Speaker
Yeah, poor form, Mitch, poor form. But, you know, that'll be a good story tell. Well, it depends on how you look at it. Yeah, betcha those dishes get done real quick now,
00:54:29
Speaker
eh? Kitchen's clean, boy. just go right And the memory. Yeah. They last a lifetime. yeah They have a Kiwaha over here in Australia, eh? Fuck around and find out.
00:54:44
Speaker
Yeah. They found out, alright.
00:54:49
Speaker
You don't really expect it from your man, though do
00:54:55
Speaker
And for people who don't know much, his son's six. thats the question
00:55:03
Speaker
He's taller than him. Yeah, yeah. He's bigger. Oh, Kazzy's got anything else we want to perform stories you want to add to this section?
00:55:14
Speaker
I think we're all caught up on perform. Yeah, anyone anyone else got a with a topic to discuss before we wind things up here?
Gaming Discussions & Nostalgia
00:55:26
Speaker
ah Bit gaming chat there Of Me and the missus Just been getting into Back into Crash Bandicoot And Got the 100% on the Crash one po po Got through all of the Three but just going back to 100% Boy that can be a frustrating game at times I'll tell you Controls aren't the greatest That's what I remember about it And unforgiving should say
00:55:57
Speaker
Yes, very unforgiving. But that's on PlayStation now? I swear don't remember it. Well, she's got it on a Nintendo Switch, so the buttons are a little bit closer together, find. A bit different there.
00:56:12
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. But, some yeah, ah um it's a great game, obviously. But, some yeah, boy, there's some parts there. You don't remember it being as hard as it was, you know?
00:56:27
Speaker
I remember some of those levels. um Yeah, being just bullshit. Because you can't see, like, some the ones you're running towards the screen. Yeah. They suck.
00:56:39
Speaker
Oh, there's no way you'd be able to get those done in one go, is there? Nah. You just can't see what's coming up. But yeah, that's like up to, what, five now? Five or six of those games? Jeez. Crash Bandicoot.
00:56:50
Speaker
Yeah.
00:56:53
Speaker
Yeah, well, they've got the remastered one or whatever, That's, like, been chucked out.
00:56:59
Speaker
That's what we've been playing at the trilogy. Oh, yep, yep. Yeah. Yeah, I've got, there's a lot of good games coming out at the moment.
00:57:09
Speaker
I've got Game Pass for Xbox, and there's, like, God, I can't keep up. It's just so, like, every week there's, like, new games coming out on there. I downloaded, was it Dead by Daylight?
00:57:21
Speaker
Oh, yeah? Yeah, the the zombie one? Yeah, I don't know really what it was about, but there's a part five, so I was thinking, oh, it must be pretty popular. Got halfway through the tutorial and just deleted it. I just got a bit patience now, eh?
00:57:34
Speaker
yeah if you Yeah, it depends on what you want to but you want to get out of your play sessions, I guess. There's heaps of games, i like got little puzzle games I'm playing. Have you even heard of Bellatro or Palatro?
00:57:47
Speaker
It's like a card game, and the idea is to make poker hands. So your pairs, two pairs, three of a kind, four of a kind, straights, all that sort of stuff. But you can add more cards to your deck.
00:58:01
Speaker
There's joker cards that you play to boost your cards and stuff like that. and I don't know if you play these games, as they're run-based games where... The more you play it, the more stuff you unlock, so you get better at doing the runs, and you get more points and faster and all this sort of stuff.
00:58:20
Speaker
But yeah, it's addictive, man. Like, you can build your deck in a way, or you can unlock cards in a way that... So an example might be, like, every time you play a face card, you get ah a multiplier added.
00:58:31
Speaker
So if you've got two pair and they're all face cards, you get this multiplier every time so but it's on everything now it's on mobile it's on switch it's on pc it's on playstation it's on everything so yeah but i like it because even if you've only got like 10 minutes 15 minutes of time you can jump on and do a quick run but then you might always unlock a card that you can use later on another future run as well because a lot of games you gotta have an hour up your sleeve hey Yeah, yeah. So this one is, yeah, they're kind of, you can get a run done in about 20 minutes.
00:59:05
Speaker
um Yeah. <unk> got A little bit of a situation I'm struggling with related to gaming and and my kids. And this data I've only got from my own kids, so it's pretty, it's early stages yet. But my theory is that kids today are,
00:59:26
Speaker
I get the same sort of satisfaction out of things that we did when we were growing up.
00:59:32
Speaker
whatever it may be, a gift or, you know, something that they've worked towards, you know, they get no satisfaction out of it. and And the reason I think, particularly my kids, is that one only plays Fortnite and one only plays Minecraft, and there's never an end to it. So I've tried to go out and buy different little RPGs like Assassin's Creed, Call of Duty, even like Dragon Ball Z fighting games and that, and there's an end to those games, you know, you work hard towards the end, you clock it, you get a bit of satisfaction.
01:00:00
Speaker
yeah out of it it was fucking not working so ah you know it's it's an ongoing thing you win the game bang you start another round you go again there's never a and end to those games yeah it's not yeah you i don't know if it's the kids though i think it's the games the live service games are hooking them in with that short game loop but it's never ending
01:00:26
Speaker
Have you tried choking them out? So, PT game just doesn't work. Maybe ah the odd choke out every now and then might. I'm just joking. Reset him, bro.
01:00:38
Speaker
Yeah. Choke him out and then put on Assassin's Creed, you know. Put it in his and the hand in Assassin's Creed and see if that goes and doesn't work. Do it again. That's called forced enjoyment.
01:00:51
Speaker
Mitch, and you've just got to get them used to it.
01:00:57
Speaker
Say the same about competitively six. I get what you're saying there, though. Like, sometimes I just miss that turn the fucking game on and try and clock the fucking name. Nowadays, like, ah I got um that 2K25 WWE game.
01:01:14
Speaker
Fucking turn it on. It's got all these different modes and shit and, like, oh, one where you've got to try and run your own wrestling Set up and all that. I'm not here for that, you know? Yeah, yeah That's the life service. ah play to They should at least have one where you just get your dude, try and beat all the dudes, and then that's it, you Like like that NWA revenge game, eh?
01:01:39
Speaker
Yeah. It had 10 fights to go through, then the last one, he had a belt, beat him, you're the winner. Yeah. Exactly. Those are good games. They're still out there. they just They're just harder to find um because they're they're being made by smaller teams that don't get the same publicity or or money to throw at the marketing side of things.
01:02:01
Speaker
But they're out there. There's some fucking cool indie games that you can either play for free or pick up pretty cheap. Oh, sorry, Matty. Yeah, go for Have you played that Bring Us the Moon game or whatever it's called? I've heard of it.
01:02:15
Speaker
I've heard of it. You've heard of that one? Yeah, I saw that. I was looking through the PlayStation Store last night. I saw that. It looked kind of cool. But yeah, like that's the there's a big toss-up of the indie games there, eh? Whether it's going to be like yeah you know cheap and shit,
01:02:32
Speaker
or you know more More and more, I think the quality is getting better. They're getting better shit and better. It could be expensive as shit, know? Yeah, the quality is getting better. um Here's another one that I'm playing at the moment, which is, like can ah it cooks my noodle when I play, but in a good way, is called Blueprints.
01:02:51
Speaker
um Another run-based game, but you' ah the premise your uncle or grandfather has... giving you this house but the thing with the house is that you create the rooms every time every time you open a door so you like you have a certain amount of steps that you can take in the house as well and then some rooms might give you extra steps or some rooms might give you this but it's also blueprints as in the blueprints of a house that play on words, but it's a puzzle-based, so there's, like, all the rooms are linked together with different puzzles, or there's puzzles in the room that you've got to figure out, but the idea is to get from the entrance hall to the 46th room, and then you've won the game, but, man, yeah, it's a lot of stuff that... I've got a notebook now that I've written two pages of notes in, helping me ah try and figure out...
01:03:46
Speaker
Like, okay, well in this room there's this and then in another room there's this and this means that. So now if I build those two rooms together, will that unlock this thing? So yeah, I don't know, just sort of, yeah, it's a good way to keep the brain active as well, um I find.
01:04:04
Speaker
Whereas it's not always just running around shooting dudes and, you know, maiming people or choking them out. I find I get pretty good anxiety from games. that like ah ah like I like my racing games and I play like strategy-based games. Is it...
01:04:21
Speaker
so World of Warships, and you're like one warship, and there's like five others, and there's a big map, and it's team versus team, and you've got to try and just take them all out. Yeah. It's a lot about strategy. I think they do tanks as well. Yeah, World Tanks I've heard of, yeah.
01:04:37
Speaker
But it's it's quite good. But, um like, I play Formula 1 because I like watching Formula 1. I quite, you know, i love that shit. And, um, but you got to like the focus you got to have is extreme.
01:04:48
Speaker
And I was having a game last night and the next minute, um, um, my kids are, you know, doing their thing, having tea. And then I finish it, having had a few good laps. I'm like, fucking hell, man, clean your mess up. And I'm like, whoa, settle down.
01:05:02
Speaker
Get bit of fucking game aggro over here. And I had to tell myself, bro, turn the game off. This is, this is you. you forget It's good. Rage quitting. Yeah. Um, Yeah, it's different for everyone, how they handle it. But I get, yeah, I just fuck i get locked in too. Like sometimes if thought it's a good game, that's just, and like those fast-paced games, yeah, I do enjoy it, but they give me high anxiety as well. Like I get, I was like, fuck, I haven't breathed for like 30 seconds.
01:05:30
Speaker
It's just got my, I'm holding my breath the whole time. But I love it, man. Yeah. And the stories they can they can do now in games are just like, yeah. Yeah. They're so good.
01:05:42
Speaker
Yeah, find if I've been on the simulator late at night, I'll i'll struggle to sleep after that, you know, like, it's bit too intense. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Same thing, you get the, but yeah, it gets that heart going, like say, you don't breathe.
01:05:55
Speaker
Yeah, we get into um but of ah it's the easiest way for me to get into a flow state, actually, because I don't get that from work. So it's nice to have that feeling of like you're synchronised with, you know, whatever's happening on the screen sort of thing.
01:06:11
Speaker
and notice my son Nikola gets carried away. Like when he must be in that high anxiety mode, he'll just be like up in my room playing. and um I'll just hear him start clapping, like, real loud, just clap, clap, clap, and I'm like, oh, shut the fuck up, man, and then I realise it's like, that's probably him between breaks, and he's just, like, been on edges the the whole time, you know?
01:06:30
Speaker
Yeah. And you would get this too much as watching, like, the boys play Fortnite or something, or a game, and they're just, like, all over the place, and, like, doing shit, you're like, fuck, I've never seen anyone do that before, or, like, whoa, that's crazy.
01:06:44
Speaker
Even the way, like, some of the way the boys hold the controller sometimes, like, hands were all clawed over it and doing, you know, multiple button presses. I was like, what the fucking hell?
01:06:55
Speaker
Just hold it normally, mate. Yeah, well, we had a game when I was a kid on Nintendo 64. um And because my koro Pete in Rotos, he he just went and bought a big box of these floppy disks.
01:07:07
Speaker
So we were just going through them, chucked one on, and it was six games. And we were just like, whoa, what the fuck, we should be playing this? And then he gets it out. Oh, put that on. want to look at that. And it was just people in different styles just getting their RPM and their PPMs up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was all about the PPM back in those days, I think. So you had to hold the control in a certain way, and it was... You know, it was pretty hardcore.
01:07:30
Speaker
I was six, and I shouldn't have been saying that shit. That sounds like half the work, bro, for our app. You've got all the data there. Yeah. Just got to work it out, really.
01:07:43
Speaker
ah yeah you I'm sure some of these watchers will do it just nowadays, eh? Yeah, probably. Yeah. I've already got the stuff on them. um heard of like I've heard a few stories, eh? Like girls that get together and they synchronise their watches because they all go to the gym and that.
01:07:59
Speaker
And then at certain times, eh, their watches will be going off because one of their mates' says fucking heart rate's going off at three o'clock in the morning. Oh, that's right. Her man's a scaffolder.
01:08:11
Speaker
Cindy's just run eight Ks.
01:08:17
Speaker
I'll be fucking synchronising up, all right?
01:08:24
Speaker
Yeah, there's pretty other ways they can get the data.
01:08:29
Speaker
Well, that's all right. You, um... You had probably one of the OG Formula 1 games on PlayStation 1, wouldn't you, didn't you, Miles? Yeah, it was the first game I ever got, actually. The old man got us a PS1, well, back when was just called PlayStation, um from, was it the AGL or whatever, at ah the Wauru Army Camp?
01:08:50
Speaker
And we got to choose two games. One was Resident Evil, one was Formula 1. Good picks. Yeah. Formula 1, oh, Resident Evil was so scary, eh? yeah That would have been the OG one with the fucking proper said power on the button.
01:09:06
Speaker
Power and eject instead of the signs, eh? The PlayStation? Yeah, the the grey box. Yeah. The very very oji one. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I know what you mean. Like, so the two buttons on top, um later on, they just turn to symbols, eh?
01:09:21
Speaker
Yeah. But yeah, our one, yeah, had power written on it and eject. Eject, yeah. That's a good pickup. Would that be a real rare one now? Surely. That was it. Must be, eh?
01:09:32
Speaker
Couldn't have clue where it is. Yeah. You know, they could be used for other things, eh? Because I remember this one time when, um ah you know, well, back in the day where we used to drink quite a lot as a kid, and which I don't suggest.
01:09:47
Speaker
But old Johnson was living in the back room of the pub in the hotel, and we went around there in the morning. He always used to sleep in because, don't know, he just always used to sleep late as they, and I always used to get up. I suppose it's from milking cows and stuff. He just used to getting up.
01:10:00
Speaker
um I remember going around there, probably still hung over, and knock on the door, and he opens the Oh, fuck, fuck. And he goes in there, his TV's on, the screen's a bit all funny. And he to always have a PlayStation. Did it dislocate his shoulder?
01:10:13
Speaker
No. it was just the This is pre-internet. oh this It always used to have music playing on the PlayStation, you know? Oh, yeah, yeah. And his PlayStation's open, TV's on, and all sort of shit. And he's just still trying to get his head around it.
01:10:29
Speaker
And then we're fucking sitting there and we're like, what happened last night? I was like, fuck out of here, man. I'll just fucking wake up when I'm here and this whatever. And then he goes to get some clothes out to go for a shower. And he's fuck, my clothes wet.
01:10:42
Speaker
And in the middle of the night, we figured out that he'd got up to go on the toilet and instead opening the toilet, so he's opened up the PlayStation and pissed all through the PlayStation and all through his drawers. Yikes.
01:10:52
Speaker
Yeah. That's an electrocution. Does work? Well, it was Dick or the PlayStation. Well, he had two kids after that, so I don't know, PlayStation was fucked, though.
01:11:03
Speaker
Yeah.
01:11:06
Speaker
And they look like him too, these kids, so I'll contest to that. Good kids, good kids too. Big fan of him. Nice.
01:11:19
Speaker
Alrighty. Yeah, well...
01:11:22
Speaker
Yeah, a lot of gaming consoles I'm finding these days don't work when you piss in them, eh? That's, you know. It's a serious design flaw.
01:11:35
Speaker
When are they going to bring out a waterproof law? You reckon the old Master System or Mega Drive would have handled that sort of punishment into the cartridge slot? Then you just blow into it again, bro, and she'll be right. Yeah. I reckon the Super NES would have handled a piss, yeah. not' not the Not the original Nintendo, because it had that flap that you pulled up at the front.
01:12:01
Speaker
and then slid the cartridge in. So that's if that was up, and the cartridge slot was up, that's piss city there, sharing over all the internals. I think one of the one of the younger cousins, I won't name her, but I think it was Atarau.
01:12:19
Speaker
think she might have put her shit inside Shannon's Xbox back in the day. He was not happy about that. I think there was a Margaret, you're fucking kid. Was he trying to hide the shit? don't know. I think she just a big fan of it, just trying to share it around.
01:12:37
Speaker
I like Shannon. Here's some for later. He'll appreciate this all smeared over his Xbox. Well, look at him now. He works at the shit farm, so maybe that set him on his way. ah Did him a favour. Yeah, if it wasn't for him, you know, Taipo might be struggling to flush toilets.
01:12:52
Speaker
an Unsung hero there. Yeah, there you go. ah That's a name of a special, eh? The Unsung Heroes.
01:13:00
Speaker
Yeah.
01:13:03
Speaker
People who pay strippers $15,000 for a night's work. Unsung hero. Yeah, well. He was keeping the lights on there, I tell you. yeah o Allegedly. That Duck Hunter was a good game back in the day.
01:13:18
Speaker
Yes. You got to keep people back, though, behind a line. Otherwise, they just go up and just start fucking murdering it.
01:13:26
Speaker
Yeah, because that worked by, what, when you pulled the trigger, was like a white square, like the duck turned into a white square, right? And the gun would detect...
01:13:38
Speaker
So even if if you put the gun in front of a white piece of paper, it would it would give you the kill too. always wondered why it did that because, you know, like the infrared and all that sort of stuff wasn't as good as any. Now they they didn't have Bluetooth or anything like that.
01:13:51
Speaker
So how they did it. Well, that wasn't it the TV part of that equation? The cathode ray tube TV was an essential part that. well, you could do it on any TV, but it just, when you, if you landed on the duck,
01:14:05
Speaker
It had a like like a but pink light color detector in the gun that would just depict white. And the rest of the screen, when you pulled the trigger, the screen was actually just black with a white square where the duck would be.
01:14:20
Speaker
Just really quickly. So it's actually quite obvious for the rest of it. You know, it didn't have to differentiate between all the different colors. It was just, is it white or is it black? And that's how that worked. Oh, okay. That's pretty ingenious, to be honest.
01:14:34
Speaker
Yeah, I'm pretty on to it. Yeah, i don't know if you... Yeah, because you never notice when you put... You just think, oh, it's a gun flash when the fucking... You do it. It's only for a split second, so you barely even see it, but... Yeah, Yeah, that's how they work.
01:14:49
Speaker
Not like the old i ah the old fucking PlayStation Eye and whatever else they got now. Yeah, I like the Switch sensor, but... Oh, that was i'm pretty much just the infrared detector too, wasn't it?
01:15:01
Speaker
think. What's that one? The, um was it the Wii? Yeah. Nintendo Wii, I think it had that sensor bar. Yeah, that had a camera of some description. Well, it had that sensor bar that would sit on top of the TV, didn't it? For your Wii remotes.
01:15:18
Speaker
Similar to the Kinect. Xbox Kinect. Yeah, that one, none of them really have fully taken off, eh? Not as much as you'd think they would. Yeah. It's not accurate enough, eh?
01:15:31
Speaker
Nah. um Plus with that connector, you needed a huge room. They had a connector, eh? Who? Alex, yeah. The gut, Palm Crisis PS1. Oh, Did they have something that you putting on the TV? or No, I'm pretty sure you just shoot to the TV screen. The technology was on the gun, yeah.
01:15:49
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah, I wonder if that worked in a similar way to the Duck Hunter. I think it was, yeah. Same technology. That was a good game. Very addictive. Yeah, man. Yeah. i was addicted to the arcade version.
01:16:00
Speaker
That's for sure.
01:16:02
Speaker
Down the old fish and chip shop.
01:16:06
Speaker
We used to sell it. Oh, not sell it. ah You could hire it out at United Video. That gun game, Time Crisis. And there was a dude who...
01:16:16
Speaker
I knew, and I happened to have to go around to his place to pick something up. But he was playing it. He'd been playing it for all weekend and um pretty much nonstop.
01:16:28
Speaker
And his hand had swollen up like the size of a tennis ball. Like he was holding a tennis ball from that repetitive motion of just holding the gun and pulling the trigger pretty much all day.
Streaming Services & Video Rental Nostalgia
01:16:41
Speaker
And it was just, yeah, hand swole
01:16:44
Speaker
i so yeah
01:16:48
Speaker
i fucking I'm starting to get to the point now where I kind of just want the video stores back.
01:16:57
Speaker
Yeah. I know what you mean. physical Physical media is kind of, yeah. Not even that, it's just like you go down there and they've got all, you know, they've got it all. mo For the most part.
01:17:09
Speaker
ah Sometimes, like, now you can get to buy five different streaming services to get what the one video still had. Yeah. We've been bamboozled with that the streaming services. It's just as bad as the, like, Foxtel was back in the day.
01:17:23
Speaker
Yeah, once you had them all up. Yeah. Yeah. So we've been bamboozled. Netflix started out as 14 bucks or something and now I'm paying, like, 30 bucks. Yeah. yeah And they've got less shit.
01:17:37
Speaker
Yeah. you yeah
01:17:41
Speaker
Bring back the fucking United video, video easy.
01:17:47
Speaker
<unk> like out of it time mean the ah and the hidden The hidden room out the back. There was the old saloon doors. Where were all those things that he's gone, eh? Like, there'd be some cunts that have just picked all those up from all the ones that have shut down, but that would have been a good score.
01:18:01
Speaker
I've seen them in Matt's spare room when turned but or to I wish I'd had some of those. Those would be worth a bit now. i remember one at the chemist in Mango A. Ebony Humpers.
01:18:12
Speaker
Ebony Humpers. I may have seen that at Barry Farmer's dad's house as
01:18:20
Speaker
but yeah i remember I don't know how we got fucking porn videos in Munkinul, but I remember watching them at, yeah, I can't remember whose place it was. Brothers.
01:18:32
Speaker
was going to throw it out there. No, I was going to say, like I think it was like one of Dave's relations or something like that. Or Albie Wilson's relations. All of those people would be partaking in that.
01:18:44
Speaker
Yeah, it wasn't, yeah. probably wasn't a really good situation. like I wouldn't, if I was to say you know, yeah, it was bunch of kids just sitting around, I was like, yeah, no, it's not really a great thing to have, you know, out there. um But, yeah, it was kind of a novel thing, I guess, back then. But in terms of having the shops back, I don't know. It's a big...
01:19:11
Speaker
Oh, it'll never happen. Nah, it'll never happen, but... Why can we not just at least have an online one where I can just fucking go pay for the one movie? You know, without getting a subscription. Like, that just pisses me off.
01:19:25
Speaker
Google's like that but that. Google's probably the closest to that, isn't it? Where you can rent... Yeah, Google Play, but even they've got, like, they they're going, no, that's just part of YouTube. It's... ah Yeah, well, that was my ex next thing is actually YouTube's bang for buck, like what you pay for what you get.
01:19:43
Speaker
YouTube's got fucking everything on it. Like, not yeah not your shows, but like if you just want to watch content, fuck, I'm on it daily just watching content because it's the premium subscription, no ads. So it's brilliant.
01:19:58
Speaker
Yeah, that's all that's all I really watch now where is YouTube and you can just search up stuff. and Yeah. you don't have to use things that you like or whatever you can even watch old episodes of stuff anyway you know they'll be on there they've got these um ah live channels now where it's just all the Mythbuster episodes playing live on YouTube um I think there's a Friends one as well yeah there's Simpsons on Stanley Guy yeah so they've got series of just like they're just 24-7 rotating shows
01:20:30
Speaker
rotating shows so pretty Well, the reality is as well is if you get a YouTube premium subscription, you don't actually have to have a Spotify fucking subscription as well now. Yeah, because you get YouTube music. Yeah, you get music.
01:20:41
Speaker
That's probably something going to get rid of is Spotify. Actually, sure I don't use it as much as I used to.
Podcast Distribution & Music Discovery
01:20:46
Speaker
What about Cust Chat Podcast? Well, you don't need a premium subscription to post there. Oh, don't
01:20:55
Speaker
So you just won't listen to your stuff ever again? i'll just listen so um ah but I'll just listen to it from the actual recording that we're recording it on. I don't need to put it anywhere. You got it pretty much pretty accessible.
01:21:06
Speaker
Yeah. Do you just post that through another, so do you post that through Anchor or something like that? or Yeah, yeah, there's another site that I just link all my, you know, accounts to it and it just publishes and pushes it all to them.
01:21:21
Speaker
So I think we go out on, um the one I use is called Zencaster, um which pushes it out to Google, Apple, Google,
01:21:33
Speaker
ah There's some other ones too, which I've never really heard of, but they're podcast sites, so I put it out there. But Spotify, Apple's the main one. Yeah.
01:21:45
Speaker
But yeah, the the the software that you use to do it, it has a whole bunch of other stuff, but I don't use it. I just use it to distribute the podcast out. It's easier than having to do it like you know multiple times.
01:21:57
Speaker
Just do it once. I do kind of, I do like Spotify for how, like, you can do your playlist radio and and song radios and stuff. Like, you can just do, like, listen to a song similar to that. I'm sure you can probably do it on YouTube music as well.
01:22:10
Speaker
Well, that's get that Rover app. That Rover app is fucking great. Yeah. Yeah, Rover's good. good Get all the Channel X, the MoreFN, like, playlists, and even George FM, which is fucking great. yeah Yeah. Yeah, George FM's good.
01:22:27
Speaker
Good, uh, Put DMV on me? Yep. That's, um... I don't know what I was going
01:22:37
Speaker
to say. Very well.
01:22:41
Speaker
Well, we might wrap it up there, cuzsies, what you reckon? We'll ah will call this one to an end. So thank you very much for, well, for Macho Man Randy Average for making the trip up from Parts Online to come and spend the the evening here. We should have a kai out there waiting for us when we're finished too.
01:22:59
Speaker
And to my bro, kare kia, Mitch. Good to hear from you again, bro. um Always a pleasure to have a chat. And toward the roof of deception, as always, exemplary podcasting abilities.
01:23:14
Speaker
Thank you, Kazzy, because you know that's what it's all about, Akers.