Transcript
Speaker: Hey folks, it's Kevin.
Speaker: I'm sick, so there's not going to be a new episode this week.
Speaker: I'm sorry.
Speaker: It's the first episode in 150 episodes that we haven't had a brand spanking hot and fresh new one on for the for you, the listeners.
Speaker: So what we're doing is I am uploading a rerun of the time that Scott and I swander from It's Probably Not Aliens was on the show
Speaker: This comes from several years ago now at this point, and we read The Worlds of Power Mega Man 2.
Speaker: It was originally split into two episodes, so this is a rerun of episodes 30 and 31.
Speaker: So I hope you guys enjoy.
Speaker: Take care.
Speaker: And we'll see you with a fresh episode next week, which will be the final episode for the Metal Gear Solid books.
Speaker: It's funny because on the podcast, the amount of times where I will, like, make a joke and Tristan just responds with, mm-hmm, and then continues.
Speaker: You gotta have a straight man.
Speaker: It's not as good without a straight man.
Speaker: So fun.
Speaker: But you know what's great without a straight man?
Speaker: What's that?
Speaker: Hey there, everybody.
Speaker: Welcome back to Pixel It.
Speaker: My name is Kevin.
Speaker: Alongside with me, as always, is Phil.
Speaker: And today...
Speaker: Special guest.
Speaker: Scott and I swander.
Speaker: That's me.
Speaker: He's here.
Speaker: Hello, everybody.
Speaker: Thank you so much for having me.
Speaker: This piece of great literature that we're about to dive into has genuinely just made my day.
Speaker: It's so fun.
Speaker: This is a foundational text.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: This is part of the literary canon of video game novelizations.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Actually, if you think about it, what we are about to talk about, when you think about it, actually might be kind of a foundational text among like video game novelizations.
Speaker: I'm not sure there are any earlier.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I mean, that's true.
Speaker: Unless there was a Pac-Man thing.
Speaker: But I don't think there would have been a novelization about Pac-Man.
Speaker: It may be like a comic strip or something.
Speaker: Like what's the bad story?
Speaker: But you're probably right.
Speaker: Pac-Man would have been the one.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: That would have been the one.
Speaker: So you're purporting that this may have been the first video game novelization?
Speaker: Is that right?
Speaker: At least this series.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Is it weird... Because this is 89.
Speaker: Is it weird that the title is Mega Man 2?
Speaker: Like, that people might be like, oh, cool.
Speaker: Is there a first one?
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Yes and no.
Speaker: Yeah, exactly.
Speaker: That was the first...
Speaker: Yeah, I guess it must have been like a hot ticket item.
Speaker: You're like, we got to sell Mega Man two, damn it.
Speaker: No time for a novelization of the first one.
Speaker: And and, you know, but frankly, if all I knew about Mega Man one was the if you can even call it exposition that we get,
Speaker: here in the egg man, it must've been a very, very boring, uh, game slash book.
Speaker: Well, um, you know, because mega man, uh, but prior to this, uh, novelization, he didn't feel feelings.
Speaker: No, that's right, he didn't.
Speaker: I was gonna ask, so I know nothing about Mega Man.
Speaker: I know nothing.
Speaker: And so this feels... This is why you're here.
Speaker: Okay, great.
Speaker: So when I was reading this, I was like, wow, this is cool.
Speaker: It feels like this must be very close to what actually happens in the game then, yes?
Speaker: Oh, oh, I mean, here's the thing.
Speaker: It is beat for beat.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: to a severe detriment.
Speaker: It feels like every chapter was describing a part of a level.
Speaker: Yeah, just like a sliver of a level.
Speaker: It's a fascinating book.
Speaker: So in case you, the listening audience, have not picked up on it, we're talking about Worlds of Powers, Mega Man 2 by FX9.
Speaker: And before-
Speaker: It's a book created by FX9, written by Ellen Miles, a Seth Godin production.
Speaker: All right.
Speaker: So, yeah.
Speaker: So we were looking into that before you jumped on the call, Phil.
Speaker: So Ellen Miles, her primary work in the aughts was a series of books called The Puppy Palace.
Speaker: And there's like a hundred of them.
Speaker: And it just has adorable puppies on the cover.
Speaker: Yeah, I have a lot of them.
Speaker: I mean, I hope I hope since in the in the time since that her writing ability has gotten a little better.
Speaker: Because if she's selling hundreds of these, I mean, my God.
Speaker: I need to know who FX9 is.
Speaker: FX9 is the guy, is Seth Godin.
Speaker: Seth Godin and FX9 are the same person.
Speaker: Same person, same person.
Speaker: I had a feeling because that was like, that's the guy who gives himself a cool nickname.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Like, you know, like I remember years and years ago when Cisco came out with the thong song.
Speaker: Sure.
Speaker: And the name of his album was the dragon, which is a really weird, like that's a weird juxtaposition.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Like, here's here's my hit single thong song from my album, The Dragon.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And then I saw him on MTV and he referred to himself as the dragon.
Speaker: He said, I'm Cisco, the dragon.
Speaker: And I remember thinking, I get a feeling Cisco's the only one who calls himself the dragon.
Speaker: It's like he's lucky we're all calling him sister.
Speaker: I know.
Speaker: It's like you can't get your own nickname to stick.
Speaker: You know, it has to come from somebody else.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: That's a that's a foul right there in terms of.
Speaker: Yeah, that's not that's not allowed.
Speaker: That's not allowed.
Speaker: Nickname, nicknamography.
Speaker: The other thing I'd like to point out on the title page is I didn't even notice this at first.
Speaker: This book is not authorized, sponsored or endorsed by Nintendo of America Incorporated.
Speaker: Holy shit, I just picked up on that too.
Speaker: So how did Scholastic get away with this?
Speaker: How did they get away with this?
Speaker: I'm just now noticing there's no Nintendo logo.
Speaker: Uh-huh.
Speaker: No.
Speaker: They mentioned Capcom.
Speaker: Like, they give Capcom a registered trademark of Capcom USA.
Speaker: How the fuck did they get away with this?
Speaker: I'm not sure.
Speaker: Maybe it's like Capcom allowed it, but there's some weird, like...
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: There's some sort of loophole where they had to point out that legalese that it wasn't like Nintendo doesn't approve this when they are very specific because Mega Man at the time was a Nintendo only character.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: For the most part, there's some weird ports of Mega Man onto like DOS or whatever.
Speaker: That's that's that's that's they're they're funky.
Speaker: I remember those.
Speaker: I had one of those.
Speaker: It had a total of two robot bosses.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So why don't we just get right into it?
Speaker: I would love to.
Speaker: I would love to so much talk about this book, please.
Speaker: This book is dedicated to Jerry, the original Mega Man.
Speaker: And right into chapter one.
Speaker: Right off the bat, right off the bat, if I may, I'd like to, this might be aging me a bit, but right off the bat, the first thing we get, we are in Dr. Light's, I don't know, what do you call it?
Speaker: His lab.
Speaker: It mentions that there are bubbles everywhere.
Speaker: They use the word bubble twice.
Speaker: They sure do.
Speaker: And he opens up the chapter with welcome, welcome, to which I immediately ask, is Dr. Light Lawrence welcome?
Speaker: it's so funny too because i didn't even catch that it starts with you know just like welcome welcome welcome like repeating a word because that is so much of like i as i'm reading through this so many times throughout this book the author will repeat the same word like twice to describe things and i like made notes of all of them so there's like the
Speaker: There's like a wet, wet world, the blue, blue sky, a long, long shoot, a long, long ladder.
Speaker: Like they just do that so much.
Speaker: And they, they, they like give it to you up front.
Speaker: Very first words.
Speaker: Welcome.
Speaker: Welcome.
Speaker: Like, welcome.
Speaker: Welcome.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Gotta be ready.
Speaker: Beakers bubbled over as they boiled away on flaming burners.
Speaker: Bubbles rose through clear pipes.
Speaker: And I don't know what he's, I don't know what's going on here.
Speaker: So because Dr. Light makes robots, uh,
Speaker: What is he doing with all this liquid bubbling over his lap?
Speaker: Moonlighting as an alchemist or something.
Speaker: Oh boy.
Speaker: So yeah, chapter one, Dr. Light is laying some track.
Speaker: He's basically saying, oh, Mega Man.
Speaker: That's his voice in the... That's now canon.
Speaker: That's Dr. Light's voice.
Speaker: That's his voice in one of the later games.
Speaker: He's got, I hate to have to tell you this news, but... And then notice how Mega Man responds.
Speaker: I know, I know.
Speaker: So yeah, Dr. Wily's back and he's got to fight some battles.
Speaker: You're gonna have to go defeat him.
Speaker: Mega Man's just like, cool.
Speaker: But Mega Man, you can't fight him alone.
Speaker: Did either of you also notice the immediate typo on chapter one, page one?
Speaker: No.
Speaker: No, where was it?
Speaker: In that final paragraph, Dr. Wiley is spelled with an E, whereas everywhere else it's just W-I-L-Y.
Speaker: Immediately.
Speaker: Typo.
Speaker: Everywhere else, no E. Right off the bat.
Speaker: Right off the bat.
Speaker: I gotta wonder if this woman was paid by the letter.
Speaker: Had to squeak one more out.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Just like, look, the double words are a creative choice.
Speaker: Back off.
Speaker: Give me that extra 35 cents.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Oh, you're totally right.
Speaker: It's like you turn the page and they say Dr. Wily like five times.
Speaker: Even before then, they set it up in the paragraph before it with Dr. Wily is just W-I-L-Y.
Speaker: And then they've... It just caught me off guard immediately.
Speaker: Like, which one is it supposed to be?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: So, yeah.
Speaker: So they find out that you find out that doctor Dr. Wiley is back.
Speaker: Mega Man's going to have to fight.
Speaker: But he says he says that they what is it here?
Speaker: He says Dr. Light was just as smart as Dr. Wiley, but he used his genius for good, not for evil.
Speaker: He vowed long ago to do everything in his power to protect the universe from destruction.
Speaker: And we get a little background information on Mega Man, who is a tool using robot.
Speaker: Not a superhero.
Speaker: Not a superhero.
Speaker: Except he's referred to as a superhero dozens of times after this.
Speaker: Constantly.
Speaker: He is a superhero.
Speaker: And yeah, this is...
Speaker: He's like a he's like a he's like a he's like a gunman.
Speaker: He's like a Wild West gunman who's retired to the mountains after the first game.
Speaker: Yeah, right.
Speaker: He's got like his own little village that he like loves that.
Speaker: He just talks about home sweet home.
Speaker: I just love his home sweet home.
Speaker: it's just yeah you imagine him as a farmer out there just like oh those days are far behind me that would be i mean he is a tool using robot so he would know he would know i and i i love that they oh where is it they say that the when dr light basically designed him he made sure that he would only ever think of good like the only
Speaker: So like Canon right here, Mega Man's a paladin like that.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And he's a he's a paladin.
Speaker: What what's the what's the robot D&D robot?
Speaker: Oh, Warforged.
Speaker: Yeah, Paladin Warforged.
Speaker: There we go.
Speaker: Paladin Warforged.
Speaker: Yeah, that makes sense.
Speaker: And his deity is Dr. Light.
Speaker: That makes sense.
Speaker: Yeah, because he has to obey everything.
Speaker: Yeah, that's exactly right.
Speaker: They state this twice.
Speaker: They make a point of saying it twice.
Speaker: Mega Man has to obey Dr. Light because he's a robot and what else can he do?
Speaker: And you would think then that the very next thing that happens in this story sets up that he will do something that defies Dr. Light.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: I don't think that happens.
Speaker: No, no, no.
Speaker: At no point, uh,
Speaker: And at no point in this entire book, which at my count, the edition I have is 73 pages.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: At no point in this entire volume,
Speaker: Is there ever a moment where Mega Man has to defy any expectations?
Speaker: You pretty much know exactly what's going to happen.
Speaker: I feel like Ellen Miles literally sat down and watched FX nine or whatever his name is.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: FX nine play Mega Man Seth.
Speaker: And so basically Seth Godin wrote an outline
Speaker: He wrote an outline for the story and handed it to our writer.
Speaker: That's that's that's apparently the way these words.
Speaker: I believe that.
Speaker: I absolutely believe that.
Speaker: There's so there's so many examples of that.
Speaker: So and it's so perfectly set up because what happens is there's a failed cloning experiment.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Where the fuck did that come from?
Speaker: Wild.
Speaker: Well, so it comes from the robo transometer XZ4000.
Speaker: But what I love about this device is it is just, I don't know what it's meant to be used for, but it is the robo transometer XZ4000.
Speaker: With cloning capabilities.
Speaker: With cloning capabilities.
Speaker: Yeah, that's not its primary purpose.
Speaker: It just has that on top of whatever it's also used to.
Speaker: Yeah, this is just like a model version up from the regular XZ4000 that does not have cloning capabilities.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's a personal massage.
Speaker: It's what it's mainly used for.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's mainly just has cloning capabilities.
Speaker: So whoopsie, somehow the cloning machine replaces all of his circuits and circuit boards and robot parts with bones and fats and flesh.
Speaker: And somehow Mega Man is now human.
Speaker: which I got to tell you, that's a colossal fuck up.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's like, it's like, it's like if you went to McDonald's and ordered a big Mac meal and instead they punched you in the face.
Speaker: Like, oops, sorry.
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: And you were just fine with that for some reason.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You're like, you know what?
Speaker: Honestly, I deserved it.
Speaker: You know,
Speaker: You know what?
Speaker: My New Year's resolution was to cut back on the fast food, and you're helping me out.
Speaker: Thank you.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, it's...
Speaker: I don't and I've been I was waiting the entire book and maybe this is the wrong.
Speaker: This is this is the wrong horse to back is this book.
Speaker: But I was waiting for the entire right for that to pay off.
Speaker: This is like a this is almost like a Chekhov's gun of like he's human now and he's not a robot.
Speaker: And maybe he doesn't have to follow a set do whatever Dr. Light says.
Speaker: Exactly.
Speaker: It's a major it is a major complication in the story.
Speaker: And nothing comes up.
Speaker: Changes everything about the character from the ground.
Speaker: Nothing matters.
Speaker: It's actually it's actually kind of fascinating.
Speaker: Like they talk about.
Speaker: I'll tell you what, I will not lie.
Speaker: There was a moment where Mega Man talks about feeling fear.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And he's not used to the idea of feeling fear.
Speaker: He doesn't know what that emotion is.
Speaker: It takes him a minute to realize his fear.
Speaker: That's actually pretty cool.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: That's actually not bad writing and nothing comes.
Speaker: She might as well have given him a 14 inch cop.
Speaker: Like it just for, for all the difference it makes in this entire story.
Speaker: It's just and every now and then like in the fight every now and then like Mega Man absentmindedly adjusted himself to the other pant leg and then prepared the Mega Buster, which is not his cock.
Speaker: I mean, you know, it's a book for kids, so.
Speaker: That one will need to be a second draft on that one for sure.
Speaker: Yeah, it's got to learn somewhere.
Speaker: to know about robots with 14.
Speaker: Previously, he was mega boy.
Speaker: Now he is mega.
Speaker: Mega man is all grown up and was it?
Speaker: In many ways.
Speaker: It becomes a Chuck tingle.
Speaker: Oh my God.
Speaker: Can we get that man on this?
Speaker: Oh gosh.
Speaker: And Scott, your favorite line then starts right off of chapter two.
Speaker: Oh my gosh.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Mega man stirred.
Speaker: Yeah, Mega Man stirred.
Speaker: His head hurt.
Speaker: Quote, my head hurts, he said.
Speaker: Ha ha ha ha ha!
Speaker: And I love the follow-up, because Dr. Light says, what?
Speaker: Shadda, Dr. Light, you're a robot.
Speaker: You're impervious to pain.
Speaker: It just sounds like he's blaming him.
Speaker: Dr. Light immediately gaslights Mega Man.
Speaker: That isn't... Your head doesn't hurt.
Speaker: Your head doesn't hurt.
Speaker: You don't have a head.
Speaker: That's not... That's just not a thing.
Speaker: Oh, my... Yeah, these emotional moments.
Speaker: We get a lot of emotional moments.
Speaker: Mega Man, like...
Speaker: Dr. Lake's telling him about his, he's like, you still got to go fight these robot masters.
Speaker: And I don't care that you're, you're, you're going through puberty now.
Speaker: And, and, and he says, do you have, you know, it's like,
Speaker: I forget what it is.
Speaker: Here it is.
Speaker: He's trying to get the briefing and he senses a hesitation from Dr. Light.
Speaker: He says, I know what you're thinking, said Mega Man.
Speaker: You think now that I'm human, my size might work against me because they mentioned that he's really short.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: You think I'm too small to do the job?
Speaker: And it's like, did he also he also gained insecurity as a human or something like
Speaker: He became like, he became like a angry, you know, Italian New Yorker or something like that.
Speaker: Just like, yeah, I'm short.
Speaker: I can still kick some ass.
Speaker: You're telling, you're saying I can't do it.
Speaker: Like Dr. Light is most likely just concerned that Mega Man is now human, but the one insecurity in Mega Man's head is like, I know what you're thinking.
Speaker: I'm short.
Speaker: I'm short.
Speaker: I can do it.
Speaker: I promise.
Speaker: I'm 5'3 and I can't kill some robots.
Speaker: Fuck you, life.
Speaker: Listen, this short king can do it.
Speaker: Come on, short kings.
Speaker: So one of the changes from the game to the book is that his gun is called the mega gun.
Speaker: The mega gun, yeah.
Speaker: Instead of the mega blaster.
Speaker: Mega blaster.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: That makes sense.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: The other change, Scott, in case you didn't pick it up, was that he's now human.
Speaker: Yeah, that one was sort of a that was sort of a big one.
Speaker: That one.
Speaker: That's never that's never a thing in the games.
Speaker: He's never.
Speaker: He's always a robot.
Speaker: That's wild.
Speaker: That is absolutely wild to me.
Speaker: It's kind of a it's kind of an abrupt change.
Speaker: Did they do that because they thought a robot main character would be not emotionally interesting to follow?
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: I don't know how much thought they really put into it.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: From from the mind of FX9 and and Ellen.
Speaker: What's your name?
Speaker: Ellen something.
Speaker: Miles.
Speaker: Miles.
Speaker: They they just they just threw this change in there and.
Speaker: Doesn't matter.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: For no reason.
Speaker: Well, yeah.
Speaker: All right.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's just like, it's just, it's just in there.
Speaker: It's just in there.
Speaker: He's there's a part of me that my instinct said,
Speaker: And this would rely on Ellen Miles being much older than she is.
Speaker: But I don't know why.
Speaker: I don't know why in my head I thought of Ellen Miles as like a mom or something like that.
Speaker: And I could, cause I could just imagine my mom going, well, a robot can't be killed.
Speaker: So we have to make them a human because humans can be killed.
Speaker: Robots can't be killed.
Speaker: It's like, you're literally about to, okay.
Speaker: Like to make it to raise the stakes a little bit.
Speaker: So we've got to raise the stakes.
Speaker: Got to raise the stakes.
Speaker: So he can feel things as this goes.
Speaker: He does feel some fear.
Speaker: Yeah, but he also kills other robots.
Speaker: He's a terrible psychopath.
Speaker: Oh, he kills so many people.
Speaker: For someone who just got emotions, he has no remorse.
Speaker: Like that was one that like totally skipped him by.
Speaker: He is like, does not get that emotion.
Speaker: Oh, you know, yeah.
Speaker: For the listeners, we are about to go through
Speaker: eight obliterations.
Speaker: We don't, we don't, he doesn't leave like the body anywhere.
Speaker: It's always like there were a few springs left and nothing else.
Speaker: Like he, he just, he nukes the earth with these people.
Speaker: And like, look, I know it's a, it's a book for children.
Speaker: So I know they're not going to explore a lot of, you know, deep philosophical themes, but how interesting would it be if he starts questioning like, well, wait, if I could have turned human and had all these emotions, like, why am I just killing these robots that also otherwise could have been these fully fleshed out beings?
Speaker: And I don't know.
Speaker: It's like, that's another story for a different time.
Speaker: I'm going to tell you something, Scott.
Speaker: I thought about that kind of thing a lot while I was reading this in the half hour it took me to read this.
Speaker: I thought about this a lot.
Speaker: And it was...
Speaker: It's I here's the thing.
Speaker: Every single time I thought to myself, ah, but this is a book for children.
Speaker: And then I finally had this epiphany where I was like, wait, never ending story was for children.
Speaker: And it dealt with some heavy, dark topics like don't talk down to children.
Speaker: Children are smart.
Speaker: They can handle shit.
Speaker: Have you ever seen
Speaker: All Dogs Go to Heaven?
Speaker: There's some brutal fucked up shit in that story.
Speaker: Yeah, also at the very end, I'm skipping way ahead, but it's not narratively.
Speaker: At the very end, at the very end of this book, it says, Dear Reader, I hope you liked reading Mega Man 2.
Speaker: Here's a list of other books I thought you might like.
Speaker: And it has things like I, Robot by Isaac Asimov.
Speaker: And it's like, are you comparing this book to these texts?
Speaker: Ladies and gentlemen, yeah, I'm so glad.
Speaker: The moment I saw that, I texted Kevin.
Speaker: I was like, does the PDF version have this?
Speaker: I need to know.
Speaker: At the end of this book, which is, it was not an uncommon thing with kids books.
Speaker: So like, say, here are some other books you might like.
Speaker: Great.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: We've got How to Eat Fried Worms, Thomas Rockwell.
Speaker: That was a classic when I was a kid.
Speaker: The Phantom Tollbooth, total classic.
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: Have space suit will travel Robert Heinlein.
Speaker: Robert Heinlein.
Speaker: Robert fascist Heinlein.
Speaker: It's so wild.
Speaker: I robot by Isaac mutton chops Asimov.
Speaker: And I think it's great.
Speaker: I think challenging kids to read outside of their reading group is awesome.
Speaker: My dad gave me a copy of Jurassic Park when I was in third grade and I am forever changed.
Speaker: He may have done things a little differently now looking back on it, but I liked it.
Speaker: And this is it's a good thing.
Speaker: But it is.
Speaker: But after this book, yeah, like after after a book that in no way could challenge this, this book could not challenge an amoeba.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So this book, why don't you dip your toe into some starship troopers?
Speaker: There you go.
Speaker: It has themes extremely similar to this book.
Speaker: You will have noticed.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Now that you're done hearing about the story of Mega Man, how about we go nuke some skinnies?
Speaker: Oh, that'll be fun.
Speaker: Wild.
Speaker: Oh, God.
Speaker: OK, so we we get into Chapter three.
Speaker: We are in Metal Man's world.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And I think I think the one thing that this book got 100 percent all across the board correct is the importance of Metal Man's Metal Blade.
Speaker: weapon uses it all throughout the book.
Speaker: And that's big.
Speaker: And this is why I think that she watched someone play because anyone who plays Mega Man 2, especially like when they were a kid knows that the metal blade is good for everything.
Speaker: You use the metal blade constantly.
Speaker: Yeah, that's a detail.
Speaker: I think that's a nice little.
Speaker: It's a nice touch.
Speaker: For sure.
Speaker: And I mean, I do like that this, that the, that the game through or that the book throughout has game tips for how to beat bosses and things like the order that mega order that Mega Man beats all these other robots is supposedly the book tells me, I don't know.
Speaker: It's supposedly the best order to play the game out.
Speaker: And that's, that's, that's, this is, I don't recall if there was a lot of different ways.
Speaker: other ways that people did it.
Speaker: But this is, as I recall, the way I did it.
Speaker: But I didn't own part two.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: Because the whole game is basically a, it's almost like a rock, paper, scissors type thing where each robot has a weakness for the other robots.
Speaker: But yeah, I forget the specific order.
Speaker: There were a couple different orders you can use for this game.
Speaker: But I think Metal Man historically was always the first dude.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: We spend a good amount of time here, I think, in this chapter, yeah.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: He fights his way through Metal Man's level.
Speaker: There's conveyor belts.
Speaker: There's things falling from the ceiling at him.
Speaker: And he blames Dr. There's way to think this must be Dr. Wily's doing like, yeah, we knew that Mega Man.
Speaker: Yeah, that's the whole...
Speaker: It's the whole, it's like, it'd be one thing if he got like mugged, you know, some kid with a switchblade like shows up.
Speaker: He's like, oh, this probably doesn't have anything to do with Dr. Watt.
Speaker: This is just bad luck.
Speaker: This is just a bad neighborhood.
Speaker: I think it's, damn.
Speaker: Mega Man wandered into Grand Theft Auto.
Speaker: He did not wander out.
Speaker: No, no, no.
Speaker: We have not seen him.
Speaker: Please call his wife.
Speaker: So he fights his way through Metal Man's level.
Speaker: And again, we're going to see this.
Speaker: We're going to see a theme of this as we go.
Speaker: We get like a total of maybe two paragraphs dedicated to the fight between Mega Man and Metal Man.
Speaker: It literally, the fights literally go pow, blam.
Speaker: Like it's like the 60s Batman cartoon.
Speaker: There's almost no descriptions of like what actually, you get like sort of the before and the aftermath, but you don't get like the specifics of like maneuvers or really much of that.
Speaker: It's just a lot of like, yeah, kapow and bzzz and things like that.
Speaker: Because kids are dumb and loud noises, even when written on the page, will do.
Speaker: They'll take that.
Speaker: It'll just be different every time they read it, because they can make up exactly what happens.
Speaker: Right, right.
Speaker: They're encouraging the imagination.
Speaker: It's a good book.
Speaker: I haven't thought about that.
Speaker: Just fill a page with onomatopoeias and move on.
Speaker: That's right.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And we get and we get pow, blam, Metal Man exploded into a million gears, cogs and flywheels.
Speaker: And then Mega Man just stood there and grinned.
Speaker: I always knew you were nothing but a heap of junk, Metal Man.
Speaker: Mega Man, please.
Speaker: Someone has died.
Speaker: You have murdered someone.
Speaker: You just you cold blooded psychopath.
Speaker: Not an hour ago.
Speaker: You were exactly like this being.
Speaker: Yeah, right.
Speaker: I know this is a new concept for you, Mega Man, but please try to have some humanity.
Speaker: This is such a very cheesy 80s movie where every time he defeats one of these robots, he says a very punny one-liner like this.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: It's entertaining to say the least, though.
Speaker: I do like this.
Speaker: And it comes to one of my favorite bits of dialogue.
Speaker: We'll get to it soon.
Speaker: Where you just go, wait, where the fuck did that come from?
Speaker: So chapter four, we are heading over to Flashman's Empire, which is cold, a damp kind of cold and gloomy.
Speaker: That's...
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: That's, that's, I mean, that's, that's an adjective.
Speaker: Like, all right.
Speaker: A damp kind of cold.
Speaker: It's, it's a, so he's making his way.
Speaker: We, we get introduced to his, his energy pellets.
Speaker: He gets to carry them around.
Speaker: Apparently that's not something you were allowed to do in the game.
Speaker: No, you're not allowed to carry.
Speaker: Now that's another thing.
Speaker: That was another thing.
Speaker: We get introduced to an E tank, which is the kind of energy you're allowed to carry around and use later on.
Speaker: Um,
Speaker: But it's and that was something I was like, oh, he's going to hold on to it.
Speaker: He's going to be at the end of his strength.
Speaker: He's about to die.
Speaker: And then he goes, wait a minute.
Speaker: And he pulls a Popeye and squeezes the spinach out of the can.
Speaker: And, you know, his arms become horribly warped and disfigured.
Speaker: And he wins.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I but no, it's just he just it's kind of like meals.
Speaker: He has to have a. Yeah, it's I just the way they're described in the book, I just imagine it's like he just carries a little Pez dispenser around.
Speaker: Right, right.
Speaker: Delicious.
Speaker: In between robot murders, I like the grape one more.
Speaker: And the E-Tanks are even described as containing vitamins and nutrients.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Next time you have a gaping, sucking chest wound, please, you need some vitamin D. That's also wild to me because had he not become human, what good would that have done him?
Speaker: I think we're stumbling on to why they made him human.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, he needed a weakness.
Speaker: He was too mega.
Speaker: Too mega.
Speaker: Not enough man.
Speaker: Not enough man.
Speaker: That's that's the next T-shirt to Megan.
Speaker: So, yeah, he has a he has a showdown with with Mr. Big from Sex and the City.
Speaker: And who has a heart attack and dies before Mega Man can properly beat him up.
Speaker: Yep.
Speaker: Spoilers.
Speaker: Spoilers for episode one of the new Sex in the City series.
Speaker: We know that we know that our audience are big Sex in the City fanatics.
Speaker: Look, I'm not watching that show, but my fiance is.
Speaker: And if I got to suffer, the rest of you do too.
Speaker: Well, I mean, it was perfect timing because Chris Noth was like, was, uh, they found out that he was like, Oh yeah.
Speaker: He was sexually harassing just about everyone everywhere all the time.
Speaker: They, we all, I think, yeah, that was, yeah, that was all coming.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: We we get we get also the beginning of a trope that happens throughout this book constantly.
Speaker: And it's when Mega Man sees a bad guy, he has to tell us that Dr. Light warned him about this thing.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And it's like, why?
Speaker: Why can't he be surprised?
Speaker: Like every single monster he fights, he goes, Oh, Dr. Light warned me about this one.
Speaker: He did.
Speaker: When this bad boy was coming.
Speaker: Yeah, why can't, why not, why not an element of surprise?
Speaker: Or just like work in the warning into that part, like have Dr. Light, because he's like, he's doing like the guy in the chair thing where he's just like outside of the battle being like, are you ready to move on to the next thing, Mega Man?
Speaker: I would rather, it would be more fun to have him be like, oh, Mega Man, watch out.
Speaker: It's this character.
Speaker: This is how you got to deal with it.
Speaker: Mega Man's like, I'm a Dr. Light.
Speaker: And then it's like, cool beans.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And then and then, yeah, the worst I hate to disagree with you, Scott, but some of the worst game hints I've ever seen.
Speaker: They end the ends of these chapters, they take them and they put them upside down to kill airman.
Speaker: Carefully jump the tornadoes to get close to it.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Is that is that a bad tip?
Speaker: Great.
Speaker: That's well, it's it's kind of you kind of have to.
Speaker: There's literally no other way.
Speaker: It's kind of like they'll be like a game hint.
Speaker: Eat an orange to avoid scurvy, you know, like something like that's like, I got it.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Game hit.
Speaker: Press buttons on the controller to do things.
Speaker: Oh, pretty much.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Thank you.
Speaker: And you're right, though.
Speaker: One of them does point out and I thought it was clever.
Speaker: They say, you know, if you pay attention to the order that Mega Man's fighting in this book, that's the way you want to see.
Speaker: That would have been more stuff like that.
Speaker: Yeah, for sure.
Speaker: It's like game hint, press right to advance in Super Mario Brothers.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: And then.
Speaker: Press right to go right.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's just, I got it.
Speaker: So we are.
Speaker: So he kills Flashman.
Speaker: That was super quick metal.
Speaker: I don't even think Flashman says anything.
Speaker: Flashman doesn't say anything.
Speaker: No, he doesn't.
Speaker: No.
Speaker: He's just fast and he throws and he just kills him.
Speaker: And the pun for this one is, you've got to be more than just a flash in the pan to beat me.
Speaker: Mega Man said that smiling.
Speaker: He was proud of him.
Speaker: He's saying it to no one but a corpse.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Mega Man, for God's sake, I'm writing.
Speaker: I'm writing a letter to Flashman was used by Dr. Wily.
Speaker: He was reprogrammed.
Speaker: This isn't who he was.
Speaker: His real name was Joseph.
Speaker: I knew him, Mega Man.
Speaker: I knew him.
Speaker: Oh, boy.
Speaker: Two down, six to go.
Speaker: Yeah, like this.
Speaker: That's right.
Speaker: Leaves Flash Man's grieving widow behind.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Oh, God.
Speaker: So we're into chapter five, and these chapters, there's like a thousand chapters in this book, and they're all kind of short.
Speaker: Yeah, I mean, that's one compliment I can give this book.
Speaker: It is just like...
Speaker: lightning fast there's no there's like no pause it's just action to action to action it's like there's no there's no moment of uh he's not not this dissecting his his actions or his thoughts or there's no inner no there's no inner life of megaman no
Speaker: It literally might as well be if you were to sit down and I mean, we've mentioned this before, but if you literally if you were to sit down next to somebody who was playing through the game and you literally just wrote Mega Man kills a big giant frog monster, Mega Man goes through things, Mega Man kills Flash Man, you'd essentially have what you've got here with just fewer puns.
Speaker: That's really what it comes down to.
Speaker: That's all it is.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And they do.
Speaker: They do.
Speaker: And you can tell because they they do have the little mini bosses like the Croker, the big robot for pops up.
Speaker: Mr. Big pops up.
Speaker: And that actually gives them an excuse to make more chapters.
Speaker: I thought at first I was like, OK, so we're going to get like ten chapters, one chapter for each of the bosses, one for Wiley.
Speaker: No, no, no.
Speaker: If we've got a mini boss,
Speaker: You get an extra chapter and aren't you a lucky boy and or.
Speaker: That's exactly right.
Speaker: It is.
Speaker: It is stuffed.
Speaker: This book.
Speaker: Stuffed.
Speaker: So he kills the giant frog with the metal blades.
Speaker: Kills the frog.
Speaker: Kills the shit out of the frog.
Speaker: Kills the shit out of that frog.
Speaker: Which, by the way, Scott, that has actually been pointed out.
Speaker: It's been pointed out to us that that is the first, like, pixel-lit trope.
Speaker: Is Phil or I saying, kills so-and-so, and then the other responding kills the shit out of them.
Speaker: which we were not doing on purpose.
Speaker: We were not doing on purpose.
Speaker: You just had your own pattern.
Speaker: Yeah, I like it.
Speaker: And now now we're doing it.
Speaker: Now it's for real.
Speaker: That's for you.
Speaker: That's for you, Harry.
Speaker: That's.
Speaker: Thank you for listening, Harry.
Speaker: So, yeah, so so Mega Man is.
Speaker: He's going down, he's going underwater.
Speaker: He's having his private little freak out moment.
Speaker: It's kind of this is another great example of like it does.
Speaker: Nothing matters because he has a momentary thing of like, well, I was a great swimmer when I was a robot.
Speaker: I wonder if things are going to be different now that I'm a human.
Speaker: No, it's the same.
Speaker: He could swim fine.
Speaker: It doesn't make any difference.
Speaker: The question here, the problem here is like, can he swim as good as when he was a robot?
Speaker: Not like, how's it going to struggle having to hold his breath now that he's human?
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: How's he breathing?
Speaker: I love it.
Speaker: It says his helmet kept the water out.
Speaker: And it's like, terrific.
Speaker: What happens after like
Speaker: 30 half a minute.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: No idea.
Speaker: He's just hyperventilating himself.
Speaker: This this cubic space of air is that's like 30 seconds of air here.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: That's it.
Speaker: That's all we've got.
Speaker: So he's he's looking for bubble man who whose stick is that in each sentence every other word is a blorable or or.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: because, which I would think he would be the only person who didn't talk that way if his whole shtick was he lived underwater.
Speaker: You think he would be adapted to communicating underwater if he's supposed to be an underwater robot.
Speaker: Right, right.
Speaker: Maybe those are, do you think those are just his underwater swear words?
Speaker: Maybe.
Speaker: Like, how gurgle dare you enter my King Borble Dog?
Speaker: Oh, I wonder, okay, hold on, hold on.
Speaker: If we replace each one of those with fuck.
Speaker: Or fucking.
Speaker: Mega fucking man, replied.
Speaker: How fucking dare you enter my king fucking dumb?
Speaker: You'll never fucking get me, Mega Man.
Speaker: You fucking figured it out.
Speaker: Dr. Wily fucking will be proud of me.
Speaker: That's what it is.
Speaker: You fucking nailed it.
Speaker: I'm sorry, you blurbled it.
Speaker: Thank you.
Speaker: I didn't even, I wasn't even trying, but I'm glad we figured out we solved that mystery.
Speaker: That was, that was, I was really concerned about that, that we weren't going to get to the bottom of that.
Speaker: And, uh, no letters over this one.
Speaker: I thought that was going to take at least 40 minutes of this podcast.
Speaker: We're going to drop everything.
Speaker: We got to figure this out.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: We're going to make a double episode out of this thing because the, the blurbling, uh, would, would assume some sort of like oxygen.
Speaker: Like, yeah, right.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Oh, that's so, so mega, he, he tries to use the, the bubble lead on him, which, which always was a little weird to me, but they, they describe it as like a mobile, a bubble of molten lead basically.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Which kind of cool.
Speaker: Um, I never thought of it that way.
Speaker: So he, he takes an energy pill, it,
Speaker: Uh, cause for a split second, Mega Man gets hit and he just lays still.
Speaker: It's like the Witcher.
Speaker: It's like, it's like in the, like, you know, when the Witcher has to like drink his little potion and his eyes go black.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: That's what Mega Man is doing right now is, is that's essentially what we're looking at.
Speaker: This was like the, the most, um,
Speaker: the most sort of scary part of this book.
Speaker: Cause this is like the only time where like Mega Man really gets, gets, gets hit.
Speaker: And, uh, they, they milked it for just like maybe two paragraphs.
Speaker: If that like, yeah, like, like just, he lays still,
Speaker: Bubble Man gloats over his body.
Speaker: Then there's a beeping inside the helmet.
Speaker: And Dr. Light basically gives him a, you gotta do it.
Speaker: You gotta kid.
Speaker: You know, just kind of gives him a pep talk.
Speaker: And Mega Man blink.
Speaker: I knew you weren't dead, said Dr. Light, but he didn't sound so sure.
Speaker: He didn't sound so sure.
Speaker: What?
Speaker: Oh, Dr. Light, we really appreciate your confidence.
Speaker: He goes, instead of going back to the lab, he is straight into Airman's empire.
Speaker: And I like the fact that they keep referring to them as empires.
Speaker: So in the Mega Man canon, and I forget about Mega Man 2, the way it's set up, each of the robots has a specific character
Speaker: like task that they do right so um there is there's like uh in the first game there's a guy there's a robot named guts man which yeah like looking back on it doesn't make any sense why he's called that but he all he does he's a construction robot he lifts heavy things and he moves them and then he goes rogue he goes evil um so the fact that they're calling them like little weird worlds and empires be like
Speaker: I don't get where, where is this like a multiverse situation or is it like, yeah, they're like hopping to their own dimensions where they're hopping over people.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Is it that's, that was what I was like going from Midgard to Niflheim or like, it kind of implies that, that it also implies that these guys are like the leaders of this empire and therefore haven't, they, they've taken it over.
Speaker: Like they take, you know, they like they, you know, massacred the local population.
Speaker: They took it over and they're looking to expand.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So Mega Man might just have to sit back and they'll fight amongst themselves for for land.
Speaker: And unless unless we are looking at a multiverse situation, right?
Speaker: In which case that shit's infinite.
Speaker: There's a lot of universe.
Speaker: Mega Man, what are you going to do?
Speaker: Mega Man, what are you going to do?
Speaker: He's just going to... This is... There's a lot of detail in terms of what he's seeing in this chapter specifically.
Speaker: I feel like this is one of the... This is a long one.
Speaker: Suddenly decided that we needed to talk about the little monsters.
Speaker: And they're strange.
Speaker: They're strange creatures indeed, which it says several times.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Strange.
Speaker: Another one that we get a lot is a mean looking.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: There's a mean looking.
Speaker: It's like, what does that mean?
Speaker: It just it looked like it would steal your lunch money just like that.
Speaker: Just like that.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So Mega Man is making his way through Air Man's level.
Speaker: Let's call it what it is.
Speaker: It's not an empire.
Speaker: It's a level.
Speaker: Well, you're diminishing his accomplishments at that point, but all right, I'll allow it.
Speaker: Well, you know, forgive me.
Speaker: I'm not going to aggrandize a warlord, Scott.
Speaker: That's fair.
Speaker: I'll concede.
Speaker: We do not platform robot terrorists on this.
Speaker: No, we do not.
Speaker: Not on this show.
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: That is a line in the sand.
Speaker: Oh, sir.
Speaker: Oh, uh, but he makes his way through.
Speaker: We got, we've got bomb birds.
Speaker: We've got a thunder chariot, uh, which he's riding a one thunder chariot after another, making his way through the air.
Speaker: And, uh,
Speaker: We get a nasty looking creature.
Speaker: Now, this is funny because I forgot about this creature.
Speaker: I thought they were describing Airman.
Speaker: Up ahead was a nasty looking creature with quickly spinning blades set into its middle.
Speaker: It grinned at him as it made its blades spin faster and faster.
Speaker: And I'm like, you're talking about Airman, right?
Speaker: A fan fiend, which I'm just going to be honest with you, that's a that's a name that bums me out.
Speaker: fan fiend a fan so in the game i think the fan fiends were like sumo wrestlers or something like that with uh really oh man with uh with like a fan in their chest i mean i guess yeah i guess airman was more like a fan as a mouth yeah yeah i'm gonna look this up that is um that is literally what it is it's just a
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: Well, he kind of looks like an overweight Mega Man.
Speaker: Oh, I see.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He just looks like an overweight Mega Man with a fan in his stomach.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And then and then and then I just get a lot of fiend.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: After that, that's enough.
Speaker: Enough internet.
Speaker: Mega Man, Mega Fan.
Speaker: That's what he should have been called.
Speaker: So, and so we get to, we get to Airman.
Speaker: Airman was the scariest looking super robot that Mega Man had ever seen.
Speaker: It wasn't that he was big.
Speaker: It wasn't that he was strong looking.
Speaker: It was his mouth.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Can I, did you, did you both notice that the very start of this book has a quote about Airman that is almost like this, but not like that?
Speaker: Like, so- Wait, wait, wait.
Speaker: Oh, oh my.
Speaker: Oh, hell, you're right.
Speaker: It's a different draft.
Speaker: It's a different draft, because the official one says Airman was the scariest looking robot that Mega Man had ever seen.
Speaker: It wasn't that he was big.
Speaker: It wasn't that he was strong looking.
Speaker: It was his mouth.
Speaker: Whereas the book like opens before anything else.
Speaker: They give you this little excerpt from the book.
Speaker: Airman was the scariest looking robot that Mega Man had ever seen.
Speaker: He was big and he was strong, but the scary thing about him was his mouth.
Speaker: And like there's little details like that that go on, but it just it felt so weird that there are two different versions of this part in this book.
Speaker: Yeah, that is nuts.
Speaker: And what's funny is I like the fact I actually like the excerpt one better.
Speaker: He was big.
Speaker: Do you really?
Speaker: He was big and he was strong.
Speaker: But the scary thing was about him was his mouth.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Something about that reads.
Speaker: I agree.
Speaker: The negative, I don't dig the negative as much as like just acknowledging the fact that he was big and strong.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: That makes sense.
Speaker: The scary thing about him was the eldritch horror that was his mouth of fan blades.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: 100%.
Speaker: I think I think as long as the draft that they went with included, as long as it included demolishing, you will be a breeze.
Speaker: Mega Man, as long as it includes that, I'm going to I'm going to accept that it was the best choice.
Speaker: Yeah, that's so that's.
Speaker: So we get I think we get like literally like three sentences dedicated to the fight on this one, which has got to be some kind of record.
Speaker: And this is kind of ugly.
Speaker: All the air was let out of air man and he collapsed like a popped.
Speaker: That's like something about that makes me think of like a corpse load.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And the wind died down at once.
Speaker: I guess it's going to be a nice day around here after all, said Mega Man.
Speaker: Mega Man, have you never been sailing?
Speaker: Wind can be a beautiful thing.
Speaker: It's great.
Speaker: A nice breeze.
Speaker: A nice summer breeze.
Speaker: Who doesn't love that?
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: Who doesn't love a nice, a nice, a nice breeze on your face?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He's only been human for, I mean, it sounds like based on this, he's, he's been killing robots for like an hour and a half.
Speaker: So he'll figure it out eventually.
Speaker: How, yeah.
Speaker: How long do you suppose this book, like, was this like a day of killing robots?
Speaker: Was this like a week?
Speaker: Like it never says like Megaman sat down for a nice nap.
Speaker: It's weird though, because I do think it, the book reads like it's immediate one after the other, but then there are,
Speaker: Then there are these interludes where Dr. Wily's over the news beam and he's sending these messages.
Speaker: So it's like clearly he's got to have time to do these things and get reports back that Mega Man had destroyed some stuff.
Speaker: So it feels like there should be, that it should be longer than it is and longer span of time.
Speaker: But the book just goes immediate one after the other.
Speaker: So it's hard to know for sure.
Speaker: Yeah, there's...
Speaker: There's there's no downtime at all, and that's not such a good thing.
Speaker: Usually when you say something like there's no downtime, it feels like it's like, wow, it's just action packed.
Speaker: Just one after the other.
Speaker: It's like there's no downtime.
Speaker: I don't know what's going on.
Speaker: Yeah, I'm so confused.
Speaker: Just immediately.
Speaker: Just always running.
Speaker: Mega Man does give another one-liner in the following chapter where he says, oh, he was just full of hot air, referring to Air Man.
Speaker: That's true.
Speaker: He had that one waiting.
Speaker: He was like, oh, which one do I go with?
Speaker: Which one do I go with?
Speaker: Because I got shit.
Speaker: I got two for this guy.
Speaker: I'll say one now and one later.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Yeah, he said the one and it didn't get the reaction he wanted.
Speaker: So he's like, all right, man, I should have done the other one.
Speaker: I'm sorry.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Like he didn't want to say the hot air one because he felt like it was cliche.
Speaker: Like he was like, everyone does the hot air thing.
Speaker: I want it.
Speaker: I got something.
Speaker: But he was like, really, he was really married to the whole nice day thing.
Speaker: And yeah.
Speaker: And just like when you are Kevin can speak to this when you're when you become that obsessed with a joke you wrote.
Speaker: It almost never goes over as well in the process.
Speaker: So he didn't and he didn't even have a writer's room to like pitch it and like, you know, And that's the real tragedy, honestly, of Mega Man.
Speaker: That's the real sad part.
Speaker: That he doesn't have a writer's room that he can pitch the one-liners to.
Speaker: Mega Man is written before a live studio audience.
Speaker: It's been good.
Speaker: Season two has been extra good.
Speaker: It's our showrunners Mega Man.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: The Mega Man.
Speaker: It's good stuff.
Speaker: So now speaking of what Scott mentioned earlier.
Speaker: You spoke to your Dennis Miller again.
Speaker: Yeah, I did.
Speaker: Mega Man's coming in here.
Speaker: The guy's just full of hot air.
Speaker: Do you get it?
Speaker: Like Air Man.
Speaker: Just full of hot air.
Speaker: So, but Scott actually referenced this and now we get it.
Speaker: We get a little bit of a downtime here.
Speaker: You know, we find out that Dr. Wily has been has been talking shit against Mega Man and it's kind of hilarious.
Speaker: It's not even live like Dr. Light's just like, oh yeah, he's been he's been talking trash and I recorded it if you want to hear it.
Speaker: And it's just.
Speaker: It's just Mega Man, the evil genius roared, you little pipsqueak.
Speaker: How dare you even think about destroying me?
Speaker: I am invincible.
Speaker: And I got to say, it's kind of funny how hard the writer has focused on Mega Man being short.
Speaker: This is the first time I've ever thought about it.
Speaker: The writer is insecure about it.
Speaker: Maybe.
Speaker: I mean, I guess when you look at the sprite of Mega Man versus everything else on the screen, yeah, he's got kind of a Logan quality to him.
Speaker: But I never thought about it.
Speaker: And it's so funny how this writer seems to have kind of like- Maybe the writer's not insecure about their own hype, but maybe they were watching something.
Speaker: Like we keep saying, they were definitely watching someone play this game and writing it.
Speaker: Maybe they're just like, that's the hero?
Speaker: The little guy?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Are you sure?
Speaker: He's so tiny.
Speaker: He's so little.
Speaker: He's not Megas.
Speaker: He's not making, he's gotta be human.
Speaker: We're gonna make him human for some reason.
Speaker: I mean, in Japan, his name is Rockman.
Speaker: So that is the subtle difference there.
Speaker: The subtle difference.
Speaker: And his girlfriend's name is Roll.
Speaker: Is it his girlfriend or his sister?
Speaker: I never knew if it was his sister or his girlfriend.
Speaker: Huge difference between those two roles.
Speaker: I mean, I'm from Georgia, not as much as you think.
Speaker: Yikes.
Speaker: Oh boy.
Speaker: Well, they're robots.
Speaker: I don't think they, I mean, I guess they can be socialized to be family, but it's not like there's genetics to worry about there.
Speaker: That's true.
Speaker: That is true.
Speaker: That, yeah.
Speaker: Robot incest, moving on.
Speaker: Moving on.
Speaker: Anyway, they're totally boning.
Speaker: Um...
Speaker: So this is this is the best bit of dialogue, I think, of the whole book, the opening of chapter 10.
Speaker: So this is where Crash Man hangs out, said Mega Man.
Speaker: And it's like, where is he?
Speaker: Mos Eisley?
Speaker: Like, I didn't expect him to be in the cantina.
Speaker: He's like, so this is his old stomping ground.
Speaker: I wonder if that blue guy will stop playing that annoying song.
Speaker: There's a jukebox in the corner.
Speaker: So he makes his way.
Speaker: Oh, we get we get a he fights a squad of pipe bombers, which I this cracked me up because the description kind of
Speaker: It sounds like they're trying to be relatable and it's so bizarre.
Speaker: These tiny robots look like small sections of pipe which had broken off, grown eyes and learn to use weapons.
Speaker: Huh?
Speaker: You know, you know, like you do like pipes that grow eyes and fight with weapons.
Speaker: You know, you know what that happens.
Speaker: Sometimes they look like inanimate objects suddenly evolve to have eyes and use weapons, not tools.
Speaker: They skip right over tools into weapons.
Speaker: Now, do they fight with pipes?
Speaker: Good question.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: No.
Speaker: Let's see.
Speaker: No, no, they don't.
Speaker: There are pipes.
Speaker: They would actually pipes that use bombs.
Speaker: They are not pipe bombs.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: They would actually consider you a bit of a bigot if you even suggested.
Speaker: It's incredibly offensive.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's incredibly offensive.
Speaker: They've got a very different culture.
Speaker: Suggest the pipe people use pipes because that's just.
Speaker: Huge.
Speaker: Yeah, they're just there.
Speaker: Just no.
Speaker: So he's he's making his way through it and we get our first instance of seeing a monster on this level that is in other levels.
Speaker: So he sees he's what is it he sees?
Speaker: Let's see.
Speaker: Oh, it's a bomb bird.
Speaker: He sees a bomb bird and he says they live here, too, said Mega Man ducking as the bomb fell near him.
Speaker: And it's just he's just learning that sometimes the designers need to save money.
Speaker: Sometimes the designers need a break.
Speaker: And we're just gonna pace.
Speaker: I guess the bomb birds are loyal to multiple empires.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Right, yeah.
Speaker: They're just, they're just, they're not even, they don't even know what they're doing.
Speaker: This is part of their mating ritual.
Speaker: They're just part of the local fauna.
Speaker: It's just nature.
Speaker: Yeah, this is local fauna.
Speaker: yeah you can't blame the loyalties yeah they you're on you're on their the bombs that they they drop are just byproducts of yeah they're they're they're mating ritual um so right you know megaman you're just interrupting and you find out later that megaman is like uh traipsing through like uh uh protected habitats yeah
Speaker: Mega Man, you've destroyed three species in two hours.
Speaker: Please, Leif.
Speaker: Yeah, he's like so triumphant at the end of this whole thing.
Speaker: I beat Dr. Wily, and everyone's like looking at all the corpses of all the endangered, now extinct animals.
Speaker: Just like, at what cost, Mega Man?
Speaker: I win!
Speaker: Freeze frame.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's like just people, people weeping in the background.
Speaker: Congressional hearings or Meg man's testifying in front of the Senate.
Speaker: It was for the good of the people, right?
Speaker: He's in a suit and tie.
Speaker: He's just like, I don't understand.
Speaker: I defeated Dr. Wiley.
Speaker: I don't know what you people want from me.
Speaker: And then he says a racial slur.
Speaker: I don't know why that's how it always goes.
Speaker: He has a real gamer moment.
Speaker: And then he in front of Congress.
Speaker: Yeah, the worst time for us.
Speaker: We get we get a fight between Mega Man and Crash Man.
Speaker: That is a full four or five paragraphs long.
Speaker: It's pretty good.
Speaker: Now, to be fair, their version of paragraphs are like one to two sentences.
Speaker: Sure, it's a kid's book.
Speaker: But it counts.
Speaker: It counts.
Speaker: So Crash Man's throwing bombs at him.
Speaker: I always liked Crash Man's bombs.
Speaker: Scott, I don't know if you looked up this guy at all or anything like that.
Speaker: Is he the one on the cover of this book?
Speaker: He he is.
Speaker: Yeah, well, he's he's he's that's quick man on the right.
Speaker: But that's Crash Man on the left.
Speaker: Gotcha.
Speaker: And his bombs actually have like drills built into them.
Speaker: So you throw them and they implant themselves in like start drilling a wall or something.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And then explode.
Speaker: And I always that was always like my favorite weapon.
Speaker: And I oh, such a neat detail that didn't really go into.
Speaker: That is cool.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Also Crash Man had, that's the one thing that is really lacking in the novel of this game novel is that the game, the soundtrack is, it slaps.
Speaker: It's...
Speaker: Oh my God.
Speaker: It is one of the greatest 8-bit soundtracks.
Speaker: That's actually the thing that I'm most familiar with with Mega Man is when I was in college, I used to exclusively listen to video game music to get me through like assignments and things.
Speaker: And Mega Man would come up a lot on Spotify.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, the the Wiley's Lair Mega Man to song is used to be my phone ringtone, and it's just it will never not be able to hype me up.
Speaker: It is such a great freaking song.
Speaker: So, yeah, it is.
Speaker: I will say, Kevin, I had I had
Speaker: the soundtrack like rolling through my head.
Speaker: I was reading this and it still wasn't enough to make this good.
Speaker: And and and speaking of that, this is actually a funny background story for Phil is that Phil's friend was one of the co-founders of the Proto Men.
Speaker: which was a band that rose to popularity doing a lot of Mega Man.
Speaker: Well, they wrote a Mega Man rock opera.
Speaker: Oh, that's awesome.
Speaker: And he was one of the founding members.
Speaker: They're still out there.
Speaker: They still tour.
Speaker: They actually went on tour with the Tupperware Remix Party.
Speaker: Twerp, love it, yeah.
Speaker: And they... Because it's two bands of people pretending to be robots, so how can you not...
Speaker: super get in.
Speaker: It's incredible.
Speaker: But yeah, they they I got to host them in in Savannah.
Speaker: So yeah, check out check out the protoman if you guys haven't already.
Speaker: Their first album is to me is still like one of the best things they ever wrote.
Speaker: It's friggin amazing.
Speaker: It's like
Speaker: It's like all of what you could do with retelling a Mega Man story in like an amazing fashion as opposed to.
Speaker: And then he jumped and then he threw a bomb and then.
Speaker: Oh, what did he?
Speaker: What does he say at the end of this one?
Speaker: Another super robot bombs out, he said happily, which is that's cusp.
Speaker: That's the worst.
Speaker: That is the worst of the lines that he says.
Speaker: It's like all the lines and then there's like a space and then you really didn't try.
Speaker: Do we workshop a new one?
Speaker: Like who's got a better one?
Speaker: All right, all right.
Speaker: Crash Man.
Speaker: All right.
Speaker: That's what I call a crash and burn.
Speaker: Crash and burn.
Speaker: That's good.
Speaker: I like it.
Speaker: That's good.
Speaker: That's good.
Speaker: That's how I killed that robot.
Speaker: I didn't have one before I started talking.
Speaker: That was, I mean, but it's on point for the character.
Speaker: Okay, yeah.
Speaker: It's a little similar to mine.
Speaker: Mine is I am become death destroyer of war.
Speaker: That's good.
Speaker: And that would then go on to inspire Oppenheimer.
Speaker: Yeah, for sure.
Speaker: Yeah, exactly.
Speaker: It was that order.
Speaker: It was that order and not, it didn't go back as far as ancient Hindu scripture or anything like that.
Speaker: I was about to say, I think it was the Rig Veda, but yeah.
Speaker: Something.
Speaker: Something.
Speaker: What are those books that an alien probably wrote?
Speaker: Yeah, I think at this point, Mega Man would would would say something like in the next intermission with Dr. Light out of nowhere, he's just going to say, now, let's see Paul Allen's card.
Speaker: I can't believe he prefers Paul Allen's card to mine.
Speaker: Oh no, chapter 11 is business card man.
Speaker: That is true.
Speaker: It fits quite well.
Speaker: The taste.
Speaker: That works.
Speaker: The tasteful thickness.
Speaker: Oh my God, is that a better mark?
Speaker: Oh my God, we were just talking about a lot of white coloring.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Oh my God.
Speaker: It's always in vogue.
Speaker: It's so good.
Speaker: But you know what else is in vogue is, hey there everybody, welcome to Pixel.
Speaker: No, I already did that.
Speaker: We're already into it.
Speaker: You did that.
Speaker: This is the longest intro ever?
Speaker: This is the longest intro ever.
Speaker: You didn't even know.
Speaker: We have to, if it's a good intro, you do it three times.
Speaker: You do it, you intro, yeah, the episode several times.
Speaker: It's pretty stellar.
Speaker: It's a rookie mistake to miss that opportunity.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: um yeah so chapter 12 is uh there's lava everywhere um there's lava because he's in heat man's world and um he's he's he's using his jet ski um yeah who gave him the jet ski was it air man he stole it from air man uh yeah yeah yeah so he's so
Speaker: He's about now they do have a cliffhanger.
Speaker: They end one chapter on him about to fall into a river of lava.
Speaker: And literally on the way down, he goes, oh, wait, my jet ski.
Speaker: So while he's falling, he has the that he has the wherewithal.
Speaker: to take the jet ski out of his backpack and just like assemble it into jet ski formation and get on it before he lands in the lava.
Speaker: And because it's not a real jet ski, it's a floating jet ski.
Speaker: He's not jet skiing through the lava.
Speaker: Yeah, it's like on a puff of air or something.
Speaker: It's like a sea dude.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I do want to say this is this chapter has one of my other favorite lines of this book, which is when he first gets here, it's obviously like super, super hot.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: This this environment that he's in.
Speaker: And so we get a paragraph that says, but as he knew all too well by now, Mega Man wasn't a robot anymore.
Speaker: He was human and he was hot.
Speaker: That's what it says.
Speaker: He was human and he was hot.
Speaker: He was hot.
Speaker: He was, read that as you want.
Speaker: I mean.
Speaker: I mean, temperature, maybe.
Speaker: Maybe.
Speaker: That's something.
Speaker: He was also sexy.
Speaker: He's a very sexy human.
Speaker: We covered earlier the specific length of one of his appendages.
Speaker: So yeah.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: It's there.
Speaker: Read between the lines.
Speaker: He's a very sexy human.
Speaker: It's hot.
Speaker: he's probably going to need to take off that suit.
Speaker: He's got to.
Speaker: I mean, he's, and then chapter 12 starts and oh, these, he is totally naked.
Speaker: And this just becomes, it just new.
Speaker: This is the point at which it spirals off into like its own, like a fan fiction.
Speaker: It becomes real challenging for the young readers, I think.
Speaker: That's right.
Speaker: There is congressional hearings over this book in Congress.
Speaker: Right, right.
Speaker: That's why it's out of print.
Speaker: In 1989.
Speaker: Puritans.
Speaker: Fucking Puritans.
Speaker: So he's on his jet ski.
Speaker: He's on his jet ski.
Speaker: He's on his jet ski, if you know what I mean.
Speaker: At least Marx is making his way.
Speaker: blows up a wall to get through it with the crash bombs.
Speaker: And then we are treated to like another really fast, a really fast moment here.
Speaker: It's a weird bit.
Speaker: I'm not normally one to get on top of people over their formatting, by the way.
Speaker: But we have a paragraph ending with a quote.
Speaker: Can you take the heat, Mega Man?
Speaker: And a new paragraph starts and it says Heat Man Paul.
Speaker: So it's like some, nobody said that, that was just set.
Speaker: Maybe that could have been, we don't know who said that.
Speaker: And then Heat Man, and Heat Man called.
Speaker: Yeah, Heat Man called unrelated to what you just read.
Speaker: Nothing to do with it.
Speaker: He was wondering if he had his half of the red.
Speaker: And I love and I love this description.
Speaker: The armor surrounded him like a huge box with a lid that could snap shut when he pulled his head inside.
Speaker: He looked like a square.
Speaker: Yes, I laughed so hard at that.
Speaker: He looked like a square turtle.
Speaker: Are they throwing shade?
Speaker: Am I supposed to be scared?
Speaker: Am I supposed to laugh?
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: So the great thing about this is that they're tap dancing so hard around the fact that Heat Man is shaped like a Zippo.
Speaker: Yeah, he's a cigarette lighter.
Speaker: He's a cigarette lighter.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: They couldn't say that in a kid's book.
Speaker: They can't say that in a kid's book.
Speaker: Square turtle.
Speaker: He looks like a square turtle.
Speaker: And he put his head in a huge box.
Speaker: Isn't that silly?
Speaker: He's just an ordinary robot.
Speaker: He's just a wacky robot.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: They should have called him Hot Turtle Man.
Speaker: He's just a little hot pixelated amphibian.
Speaker: You know how it goes.
Speaker: He's just a warm tortoise.
Speaker: Hot Turtle Soupman.
Speaker: So we get what is probably the most pitiful fight scene in this entire book, and that's saying something.
Speaker: He throws some fireballs at Mega Man, and this is the entire fight.
Speaker: Are you ready?
Speaker: Mega Man's eyebrows were singed.
Speaker: His uniform was smoking, but he didn't give up.
Speaker: Blam!
Speaker: Boom!
Speaker: Pow!
Speaker: Finally, it was over.
Speaker: Finally!
Speaker: Which... Finally!
Speaker: I mean, they gave us three sound effects.
Speaker: Usually they give us two.
Speaker: That was so long.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I'm just going to have to contact Ms.
Speaker: Ellen Miles and ask for a little bit of royalties because I never gave her permission to describe my lovemaking style.
Speaker: Bam, blam, boom, pow.
Speaker: Finally, it was over.
Speaker: Finally, it was over.
Speaker: A great national nightmare.
Speaker: That's not cool, man.
Speaker: That ought to cool your jets, said Mega Man, while pissing on the corpse of Heat Man.
Speaker: Heat Man wasn't such hot stuff.
Speaker: Now that he was human, he had urine after all.
Speaker: Oh my goodness.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: And he immediately has a second one, doesn't he?
Speaker: He's just workshopping at this point.
Speaker: He's just trying to... He really is.
Speaker: He, man, wasn't such hot stuff.
Speaker: But I'm sure glad to be out of that furnace, which is not really a thing.
Speaker: No.
Speaker: So... We're getting down to the end.
Speaker: How many?
Speaker: We don't have many left, but...
Speaker: It was a missed opportunity to start this whole, that chapter by saying like, but Mega Man said, oh boy, out of the frying pan and into the fire.
Speaker: Oh, see.
Speaker: Could have been good.
Speaker: See, you should be writing this, Scott.
Speaker: You're right.
Speaker: You can sit down with me and Kevin and we'll play through Mega Man 2 and you can write what you see.
Speaker: That sounds good to me.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And that is a dynamite way to make a book.
Speaker: You do, I think legally you have to play it in a different order than this book.
Speaker: Because I think they, yeah.
Speaker: Probably.
Speaker: Well, you know what?
Speaker: We'll just go ahead.
Speaker: You know, they didn't do one.
Speaker: They did two.
Speaker: Let's skip three and do four.
Speaker: What if it was a choose your own adventure book?
Speaker: You can do it in whatever order you want.
Speaker: They did do Nintendo Choose Your Own Adventure books.
Speaker: Did they?
Speaker: They sure did.
Speaker: They sure did.
Speaker: And I'm trying to get a hold of several of them.
Speaker: eBay is a bitch.
Speaker: Somebody's gotta keep Phil away from eBay because- Oh, I have the same problem, bud.
Speaker: I've got a wall of wine and an eBay account and it's become a problem.
Speaker: Oh, I know it.
Speaker: I know it.
Speaker: So we get our, now that I know that Nintendo didn't sign off on this, the next chapter's unauthorized likeness makes a lot more sense because we end up in Woodman's level and he meets Robo Rabbit who says, what's up, doc?
Speaker: Before firing carrot shaped missiles at him.
Speaker: Mm-hmm.
Speaker: Mm-hmm.
Speaker: They're just going to steal everything that isn't nailed to the floor, aren't they?
Speaker: Why not?
Speaker: Why not?
Speaker: Such a minor critique for me, because this book has other things going on, but there are... You may have just nailed this entire book's problem.
Speaker: But the line is, what's up, Doc?
Speaker: And it said to...
Speaker: It said two Mega Man.
Speaker: There are two other characters in this book who are legitimately doctors.
Speaker: That's a very good point.
Speaker: And Mega Man is not one of them.
Speaker: Mega Man only Mega Man has an MFA, which is a terminal degree, but not a doc.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Us MFA havers.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's we, we have to remind everyone.
Speaker: We have to remind everyone.
Speaker: It's a terminal degree.
Speaker: It's a terminal degree.
Speaker: There is no doctorate for film production.
Speaker: So basically a PhD.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You know, I could be a professor if I wanted to.
Speaker: I don't want it.
Speaker: We get we get.
Speaker: And by the way, we get another one of Mega Man's just fucking patented zingers.
Speaker: He shoots a metal blade and says, try this on Versailles, you silly bunny.
Speaker: At this point, I imagine he's saying things, but he's not saying it like upbeat.
Speaker: He's just saying, no, he is fuming right now.
Speaker: Try this.
Speaker: Try this on Versailles, you silly bunny.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He's had enough.
Speaker: He's had enough.
Speaker: He's basically Anton Chiguring his way through right out of this game.
Speaker: He goes up.
Speaker: He's going to go up to Woodman later and say, what's the most you've ever lost on a bet?
Speaker: Don't go away now, rabbit.
Speaker: You miss your lucky quarter.
Speaker: You miss your lucky quarter.
Speaker: I do.
Speaker: I do that every now and then to my fiance and I, I think she's going to hit me with a baseball bat one day.
Speaker: I like, no, don't, don't, don't leave it there.
Speaker: It's your lucky quarter.
Speaker: Put it back in your pocket.
Speaker: And she's like, I'm going to fucking kill you if you don't stop that.
Speaker: They may he makes his way to Woodman.
Speaker: And this comes to this comes to the first.
Speaker: I don't know what this sentence is.
Speaker: I don't know what this is.
Speaker: He finds Woodman.
Speaker: I'm just going to read.
Speaker: Woodman stood waiting his leaf shield at the ready.
Speaker: Want to splinter Mega Man?
Speaker: What the fuck does that mean?
Speaker: Is that a, is that like a pun?
Speaker: Is that scissoring?
Speaker: What is he talking about?
Speaker: Cause it's not want a splint.
Speaker: Like, do you want a splinter?
Speaker: It's wanna splinter as in like, do you, would you like to, would, do you want to splinter with me?
Speaker: Mega man?
Speaker: Splintering is an action.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Which, which yeah, splintering is splitting.
Speaker: Uh, but yeah, that's a stretch, man.
Speaker: Like that's, that's, that's a real, that one needed a minute.
Speaker: You could have taken five minutes.
Speaker: It's a wood.
Speaker: There are so many species of tree.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You could have gone with?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Son of a birch.
Speaker: You know?
Speaker: That would have been good.
Speaker: Pretty good.
Speaker: They wouldn't have let that happen.
Speaker: Make like a tree, Mega Man, and leave.
Speaker: And then he shoots the leaf shields.
Speaker: That's good.
Speaker: That's actually good.
Speaker: You're the root of all my problems, Mega Man.
Speaker: We have to write one of these books.
Speaker: We're nailing it.
Speaker: We're nailing this.
Speaker: I'm one of those guys whose bark isn't worse than his bite or something like that.
Speaker: Or is worse.
Speaker: One of the two.
Speaker: You know what I'm saying?
Speaker: I'm just spitballing.
Speaker: Just like Mega Man.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Just like Mega Man.
Speaker: So so we get but that is followed, by the way, by the death of Woodman.
Speaker: And what is possibly Mega Man's most homicidal victory sentence?
Speaker: You'll make a lovely footstool.
Speaker: You'll make a lovely footstool.
Speaker: You'll make a lovely footstool, Woodman.
Speaker: He is, yeah.
Speaker: He's becoming more, like, he starts off this book as a human, so you'd think that would give him, like, empathy and things like, it is all God.
Speaker: He is a war-torn, like, he is just grizzled as all can be.
Speaker: I think I figured it out, because it does say in the beginning that the whole thing... He's programmed to be good.
Speaker: He's programmed to think nothing but goodness, and now he's ready to make a lampshade out of Dr. Wiley.
Speaker: Like, he's just...
Speaker: This is, it all makes so much sense though.
Speaker: Given the freedom to think whatever he wants, he has become Ed Gein.
Speaker: Ed Gein, yeah.
Speaker: Destroying Woodman was as easy as falling off a log, crowed Mega Man.
Speaker: I don't understand that.
Speaker: Is that a thing?
Speaker: Falling off a log.
Speaker: It's as easy as falling off a log.
Speaker: I, I, it is.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I mean, it's, it is like, it is so country saying that I wouldn't be surprised if she literally had a book of idioms that she was referencing as she did this.
Speaker: That feels, that feels like very Georgia or something.
Speaker: It is.
Speaker: It's, it's, it's kind of a redneck thing to say, but not even redneck, but like country, it's just country.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So he's officially killed all but one of the super robots, Quick Man.
Speaker: And this level is so...
Speaker: weird to me now scott this is if you never having played the game they they uh literized i suppose i don't know how to put this a moment in the game where you're literally falling through a pit and as you're falling there are these like laser lights that shoot past you and usually it's they're easy to dodge they're nothing major but they make this dude
Speaker: sound.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And they and that's something that me as a writer, I would have been like, well, that's not going in the book.
Speaker: That's just silly.
Speaker: But no, we get it.
Speaker: We get a lot of floooshes.
Speaker: Yeah, a lot of floooshes.
Speaker: A lot of them.
Speaker: It takes up like a half a page.
Speaker: I mean, if we were going to get all of this, like all of these onomatopoeias and action words, I really wish this was like
Speaker: written by by somebody like stan lee because i think i think his tone his tone of of just being over the top would have really matched the oh yeah he probably would have handled it pretty well you would feel the floooshes you know right right
Speaker: It would have been visceral food.
Speaker: Now, at the end of this chapter, we get two things that I noticed that were kind of weird.
Speaker: First, suddenly we're measuring in feet now.
Speaker: It was talking about how short he was.
Speaker: Someone's taller than him.
Speaker: It's all very vague.
Speaker: But then we get a mean looking robot with flames shooting out of the top of his head.
Speaker: He was about three feet tall and he was wearing a tuxedo.
Speaker: It was hot.
Speaker: It was hot.
Speaker: And he didn't look like he was about to move aside for Mega Man.
Speaker: That's the end of the chapter.
Speaker: It sounds like they've got history.
Speaker: Yeah, they did.
Speaker: It was hot.
Speaker: Yeah, it was hothead.
Speaker: It was hothead.
Speaker: Oh, fuck.
Speaker: It's hothead.
Speaker: I thought he'd be hanging out with Crash Man, you know, so this is where Crash Man is.
Speaker: Listen, his.
Speaker: His name might be sexually accurate, but that doesn't mean we were good together.
Speaker: So.
Speaker: Were you going in such a hairy hissed hothead?
Speaker: Cool your jets, chill out.
Speaker: Which, that's a weird thing for a character called Hothead to... Yeah, back to back, cool your jets, chill out.
Speaker: Yeah, that is, they're not even following.
Speaker: They're just, if they're, here's the thing.
Speaker: If your writer doesn't care enough to get the puns correct for the theme of the character, why should we care?
Speaker: Why should we care?
Speaker: Because goddammit, somebody's gotta care.
Speaker: That's it.
Speaker: Fooosh, fooosh, fooosh.
Speaker: More fouches.
Speaker: We get more.
Speaker: We get more of them.
Speaker: We get more fouches.
Speaker: Somebody's got to care about those fouches.
Speaker: Foo, foo.
Speaker: Until he freezes them in time using this time freezer thing that he got earlier, which you probably could have been using.
Speaker: Yeah, the time stopper.
Speaker: Yeah, the time stopper.
Speaker: You could have been using it the entire time.
Speaker: Could have been.
Speaker: Oh, absolutely.
Speaker: And so he he fights quick man.
Speaker: And this is hilarious, by the way, because they were she refers to quick man as a horned robot.
Speaker: He has horns on his head.
Speaker: They're boomerangs.
Speaker: He has a boomerang on his head.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: This is the one on the cover.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: The other the other one on the cover.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And he he throws them and they go and they come back like it's pretty obvious he's throwing.
Speaker: Why is it called quick man if he throws boomerangs?
Speaker: It is a little weird.
Speaker: Like they, they, if there's one thing I would criticize for some of the later Mega Man villains is that they got really, really hyper specific to a point that was kind of silly.
Speaker: And with, but in these early days, oh boy, they were, they were playing fast and loose.
Speaker: Let's just say.
Speaker: That's not related to anything.
Speaker: I just saw this phrase and I'm going to screenshot it because it's now going to be a fantastic little meme to use on twitter.com.
Speaker: um there we go but there's this paragraph that says he looked around there was a giant w right above him that's what i'm i'm gonna use that whenever i have a little personal victory that's a great idea that's gonna be for old scott that's that's a screenshot that's a w for old scotty boy
Speaker: For old Scotty boy.
Speaker: Oh, man.
Speaker: But Quick Man... Quick Man, he jumps around pretty fast.
Speaker: I guess that's quick.
Speaker: Yeah, that's kind of his thing.
Speaker: He jumps around.
Speaker: The other thing is, like, if you use the time stop thing on him, he just, like, dies.
Speaker: That's in the game.
Speaker: Oh, like, instant.
Speaker: Not, like, instant, but you, like, stop time, and it, like, just drains his health all the way down because... Oh, cool.
Speaker: He's, like...
Speaker: Yeah, I guess the idea is if he can't be quick, then he dies.
Speaker: Basically, if he stops moving, he dies or something.
Speaker: He's a shark.
Speaker: I was about to say the same thing.
Speaker: He's a shark.
Speaker: Call him Shark Man.
Speaker: And you're his Quint.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: I guess I slowed you down quick, man.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah 100 robots went into the water 50 robots came out Anyway, we delivered them quick quick man bites into his like he's not even living until he bites into you Okay, okay, I'm gonna tell this story because I have to please
Speaker: I my fiance last year had admitted to me she had never seen Jaws before.
Speaker: It's one of my favorite movies.
Speaker: So I freak out because as a child and this is not a good thing, but it tells you something about my childhood.
Speaker: Quint was one of my role models for manhood.
Speaker: Not a good thing, but it makes sense.
Speaker: And
Speaker: So we watched it and the Indianapolis speech is coming up and I'm not I don't I'm not going to be.
Speaker: You know, I was like, I was like, I'm not going to be one of those boyfriends who like like just goes just like so this is really important.
Speaker: This is big moment.
Speaker: She got to do this.
Speaker: I've seen it happen.
Speaker: I've seen other friends like do that to their girlfriends and they ruin the movie for them.
Speaker: And, you know, the opposite effect, instead of loving the thing, they actually kind of like dislike it because they were kind of forced.
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: So I'm just play it.
Speaker: Cool, man.
Speaker: Play it cool.
Speaker: And the Indianapolis speech comes up and we're watching and I'm just kind of
Speaker: doing a quick glance over watching.
Speaker: How's she reacting to it?
Speaker: Oh yeah, exactly.
Speaker: She's leaned forward and she's got this very concentrated look on her face.
Speaker: And she's just like, I'm like, oh fuck yes, she's enraptured with Robert Shaw's performance.
Speaker: And I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just, oh, this is fucking great.
Speaker: This is great.
Speaker: And so it ends.
Speaker: And and I just look at her and I go pretty fucking amazing.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Like that was pretty great.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And she looks at me and she goes, I couldn't understand a word he said.
Speaker: She literally couldn't understand a fucking word he said.
Speaker: I'm sitting over here going, oh, she's loving the performance.
Speaker: RIP.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I was like, well, she's like, what is his accent?
Speaker: And I was like, it's New York hillbilly.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: It's really just.
Speaker: not hillbilly technically because we're on the shore, but you know what I mean?
Speaker: It's white trash from New York.
Speaker: Uh, so yeah.
Speaker: So anyway, uh, on a, on a related note, quick man is dead.
Speaker: Long live quick man.
Speaker: So we get, we, we got all the robot masters dead.
Speaker: Everyone's dead.
Speaker: Uh, except for Dr. Wiley who shows up to threaten
Speaker: threatened Dr. Light.
Speaker: It's so great.
Speaker: It says, Dr. Wiley is very much alive.
Speaker: Just this morning, he flew over my laboratory in his flying saucer.
Speaker: He hovered there for a while, yelling through his bullhorn.
Speaker: What did he say?
Speaker: Oh, he was threatening me, said Dr. Light.
Speaker: He said I should call you off the job or else.
Speaker: Back in the good old days when violent nerds actually had to show their faces to threaten you.
Speaker: I don't get the first part of that is, was there a question as to whether he was alive?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Who killed him while I was gone?
Speaker: He's still there.
Speaker: Still alive.
Speaker: So unrelated to this whole thing, Dr. Wiley got into a massive car accident.
Speaker: It was touch and go there for a bit.
Speaker: It was touch and go there for a bit.
Speaker: But I can assure you he is still very much alive.
Speaker: He's still alive.
Speaker: Good news, everybody.
Speaker: Dr. Wiley's still alive.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He's he's going to be comatose for the rest of his life.
Speaker: And even if he comes out of it, he won't be able to move anything below his neck.
Speaker: But he's alive.
Speaker: Mega Man, you can kill him.
Speaker: It's still still good.
Speaker: Still good for a mega killing.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: So good.
Speaker: I hope I hope you've got some horribly violent puns baked up.
Speaker: So we get watch out.
Speaker: Here I come.
Speaker: walking calmly to the hospital.
Speaker: As he says, as he repeats, I'm hot.
Speaker: So he's going to infiltrate Dr. Wily's castle.
Speaker: And here's the closest thing they have to any interesting threat level kind of stakes.
Speaker: You find out that Dr. Light cannot communicate with him while he's inside of the castle.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Not that he was doing a ton of communicating.
Speaker: Not a ton.
Speaker: No.
Speaker: There's actually...
Speaker: They make a point at the beginning of every chapter.
Speaker: It's like, Dr. Light's signal cut out, and there's just static.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: His voice faded out after he gave me the very helpful tip of good job.
Speaker: Keep going.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And we do get a moment where he gets he gets into the place and he's wandering through the castle and he finds himself alone and he's actually like lonely.
Speaker: He misses the sound of Dr. Light's voice, which is kind of sweet.
Speaker: That human feeling of loneliness.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He's never had that before.
Speaker: He's a lonely boy who just can't stop murdering.
Speaker: And then he murders the shit out of a dragon.
Speaker: He kills the last dragon.
Speaker: On his way there, he kills the last unicorn.
Speaker: Just for good measure.
Speaker: The last unicorn from the book, the last unicorn.
Speaker: Did anyone notice?
Speaker: I'm looking again and I don't think it's no.
Speaker: The dragon is one of the it's a terrific and very memorable boss during one of the levels of Dr. Wily's castle.
Speaker: But it's very clearly a robot dragon.
Speaker: At no point in this chapter do they mention that it's a robot, do they?
Speaker: He's just fighting a straight up dragon.
Speaker: If you hadn't told me that, I would have never known.
Speaker: It just says it was a dragon, a very big dragon, breathing fire.
Speaker: That's how it was described, verbatim.
Speaker: Yeah, that's exactly how it was described.
Speaker: Breathing fire.
Speaker: It's like, oh, great.
Speaker: Mega Man kills a literal dragon in the novelization of Mega Man 2.
Speaker: And, you know, nothing ever good comes of killing dragons in fiction, I don't believe.
Speaker: Usually dragons are not the thing that you want to go and, like,
Speaker: murder it's like an ominous portent yeah something else is gonna happen immediately after that's gonna be real bad i do like the it is fun to go from robots to like fantasy creatures like it's mega man spans across multiple different genres
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Mega Man contains millions.
Speaker: He's just, he's an endless creature.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Sorry.
Speaker: He contains multitudes.
Speaker: He contains a million dollars.
Speaker: There's always money in the Mega Man stand.
Speaker: Mm hmm.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: When you sell those organs, boy, howdy, howdy.
Speaker: These are organs from a robot man that became human.
Speaker: Now that's they are mega organs.
Speaker: Mega organs.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Mega organs for mega bucks.
Speaker: Let's go.
Speaker: Look, look at these kidneys and tell me they ain't worth 50.
Speaker: Come on.
Speaker: How did we get there?
Speaker: Sometimes I lose track of the thread of how- Dragon killing.
Speaker: Killing dragons.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Killing dragons.
Speaker: Kill the dragon.
Speaker: Kill the dragon.
Speaker: The next level, the next level, chapter is weird because it's like the wall is attacking him.
Speaker: I don't understand what's supposed to be happening.
Speaker: I had to reread it a few times.
Speaker: Was the Yellow Devil in Mega Man 2?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He was?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I have to assume that's what they're talking about.
Speaker: All right.
Speaker: Because, yeah, he's literally being attacked by the wall, and it's not really clear what's...
Speaker: Yeah, it's very confusing this chapter.
Speaker: Bricks like bricks or like they describe these bricks coming at him and he's going to blow up the bricks.
Speaker: And this is another terrific example of like not really understanding the source material or what the hell is going on.
Speaker: And it really not matter.
Speaker: It doesn't matter that much.
Speaker: He gets he gets through and he moves on to.
Speaker: Yeah, he grabs an energy pellet and then he yells the word jailbreak and then he's jailbreak.
Speaker: What the fuck was that all about, by the way?
Speaker: He shouts jailbreak.
Speaker: That's my favorite Thin Lizzy song.
Speaker: What is that all about?
Speaker: Mega Man was closing in on Dr. Wily.
Speaker: And up ahead, he saw the castle's moat.
Speaker: And I don't understand.
Speaker: Now I don't know where we are in the castle because the moat is like the first thing.
Speaker: The moat's the outside, yeah?
Speaker: The whole point of a moat is to keep people out.
Speaker: What has he been going through?
Speaker: And now he's at the moat.
Speaker: Now he's at the moat.
Speaker: Is the moat inside?
Speaker: Is it an inside?
Speaker: Is it actually an indoor moat?
Speaker: It's an indoor moat.
Speaker: It's actually.
Speaker: Indoor moat.
Speaker: Some people can afford that.
Speaker: It's actually an indoor lazy river.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: People who got that Protestant money can afford an indoor mode.
Speaker: My mode is above ground, so it's not really.
Speaker: Oh, well, you know, but some people, what's the difference?
Speaker: No difference.
Speaker: Cost you less.
Speaker: You're just frugal.
Speaker: You just gotta watch out for sharp objects, you know?
Speaker: Above ground mode.
Speaker: That sounds like such a bad.
Speaker: On one hand, on one hand, it's like one of the things that like I can simultaneously totally understand why that's never been a thing like a above ground lazy river.
Speaker: And also I want one so badly at the same time.
Speaker: That sounds awesome.
Speaker: I mean, you, Phil, when you homestead some property in Georgia, that's the thing.
Speaker: When you.
Speaker: I'm gonna get an above ground lazy river.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: A moat surrounding our farm.
Speaker: Oh, it's going to be good.
Speaker: Oh my God.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: We are, we are in the home stretch here.
Speaker: So close.
Speaker: You're so close.
Speaker: But in order to get to Dr. Wiley, first thing we got to do is get past guts.
Speaker: Dozer guts.
Speaker: Dozer.
Speaker: Guts.
Speaker: Dozer was big.
Speaker: Guts Dozer was mean and Guts Dozer was coming straight for Mega Man.
Speaker: He felt very tiny all of a sudden, but he knew he must destroy Guts Dozer.
Speaker: I don't know if I would say he felt tiny all of a sudden.
Speaker: I feel like we've been reading about people telling him that he's tiny.
Speaker: I think it's on his mind a lot.
Speaker: He's thinking about it constantly.
Speaker: He's lying to himself if it's all of a sudden.
Speaker: He's constantly, he's sitting there going, do you think Guts Dozer notices that I'm 4'11"?
Speaker: He's like, you know what?
Speaker: He's going to I've got to kill him because if I don't, he'll go back to his friends and laugh at me.
Speaker: We're all going to laugh at you.
Speaker: So he literally throws everything at him.
Speaker: Just like all of his shit he throws at him.
Speaker: Finally gets the crash bomber and blows him sky high.
Speaker: He opened his eyes.
Speaker: Guts Dozer was gone.
Speaker: He drops a nuke on him.
Speaker: Which is not how you kill him in the game.
Speaker: But we're going to blow right past that.
Speaker: You throw quick man's boomerangs into there's a little weak spot on his forehead.
Speaker: That's the way you deal with Guts Dozer.
Speaker: That's it.
Speaker: Do it.
Speaker: Pro tips.
Speaker: The book didn't tell me that.
Speaker: This is the actual pro tips.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: That's us.
Speaker: Two aging geeks tell you about Mega Man from when they played it as children in the late 1980s.
Speaker: This is a tips guide 30 years in the making.
Speaker: Oh, God, it really is.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: So we've got to wrap this up while I stave off killing myself.
Speaker: So he makes his way through it.
Speaker: We get a we get a so stupid and short.
Speaker: This is so dumb.
Speaker: So
Speaker: You get another typo here.
Speaker: We got weird.
Speaker: If only Dr. Light can talk to me, said Mega Man out loud.
Speaker: Uh huh.
Speaker: Space.
Speaker: But I know he's watching.
Speaker: At least he knows I'm still.
Speaker: Oh, yeah, because Dr. Light said I'm I'm I can't communicate with you, but I'm always watching.
Speaker: So is Dr. Light?
Speaker: He's God.
Speaker: This is that's what this is.
Speaker: It's a monotheism.
Speaker: Well, he did create man.
Speaker: Did he not?
Speaker: He did.
Speaker: He was trying to clone him, but instead he created.
Speaker: This is the true Frankenstein tale.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: But instead, Frankenstein and the monster Mega Man get along famously, and they like it when he kills people.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: They high five.
Speaker: They're super chill.
Speaker: I don't think they ever say it happens, but you can imagine there's a lot of high five and going on.
Speaker: can't stop those two from high-fiving.
Speaker: So I think this chapter is so short.
Speaker: It's like a page and a half.
Speaker: The only, the only real thing of notes, you know, he, he goes and he fights little clones.
Speaker: Does this happen in the game?
Speaker: You fight like little boss fights of the same robot.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You have it's called a boss rush.
Speaker: I think it's cool.
Speaker: You have to kill all the bosses.
Speaker: It's very cool.
Speaker: I'm glad that they just sort of made it really short sentences.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And not just talk about it again.
Speaker: Very unlike this book to skip over the action.
Speaker: It is.
Speaker: It's a weird choice.
Speaker: It's strange.
Speaker: But my favorite line, they try to use alliteration for everything.
Speaker: Like, he blew up Bubble Man, mowed down Metal Man.
Speaker: The most important thing of note, and we're still feeling repercussions in waves of this today, is that he did cancel Crash Man.
Speaker: And I think that really did set a precedent for.
Speaker: And that is why Crash Man's career has never recovered.
Speaker: Never recovered.
Speaker: That is the cruelest of the fates that he bestows upon these robot masters.
Speaker: Instead of fighting Crash Man, he just looks him in the eye and he opens up Twitter and says, I have receipts.
Speaker: He's got his receipts.
Speaker: And then as if, you know, as if.
Speaker: Just just a cruel, ironic fate at the end of that is he terminates Twitter, man.
Speaker: But I think that was that was for the betterment of all humanity, I feel.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Ultimately, ultimately, we all did better.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Positive.
Speaker: Yeah, for sure.
Speaker: It's a net positive.
Speaker: It's a net positive.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And that brings us to Chapter 20.
Speaker: It was pitch black.
Speaker: You had to do it.
Speaker: Mega Man couldn't see his hand in front of his face.
Speaker: Where was Dr. Willie?
Speaker: I mean, Wiley.
Speaker: Oh yeah, right.
Speaker: And then it's, it's,
Speaker: I'm not sure it's this, this chapter is kind of written because how did, okay.
Speaker: So he jumps into the hatch, it's pitch black and now he's just in a, and now it's just stars everywhere.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And then Wiley runs away and he chases after him and then there's an alien and it's probably not an alien.
Speaker: Weird green alien.
Speaker: Hmm.
Speaker: A very mysterious situation.
Speaker: Scott gave, gave me the Tristan.
Speaker: Hmm.
Speaker: On, on, on,
Speaker: I once again forgot the thing that I do for like a living.
Speaker: Oh my God.
Speaker: It's amazing.
Speaker: No, no.
Speaker: It's like, you know what?
Speaker: You had an opportunity and you took it and I appreciate it.
Speaker: You're right.
Speaker: It's probably not aliens.
Speaker: You're not at your place now.
Speaker: You get to act out.
Speaker: You get to try something.
Speaker: Try them as a new pants.
Speaker: It did not even register in my brain that you were making a reference to a thing that I do.
Speaker: I was like, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: It's probably not an alien.
Speaker: You're right.
Speaker: It's probably not.
Speaker: i bet it's i bet it's dr wiley dressed up so yeah anyway to suggest any and to suggest otherwise is like based really in western racism so no that's that's a good you made a good joke kevin and i it flew right by right over my my tiny little head it just went right over it
Speaker: The nicest guy on the internet, Scott.
Speaker: No, Kevin, it was a good joke.
Speaker: It was really good.
Speaker: Keep your chin up, buddy.
Speaker: It's a good joke.
Speaker: It wasn't you, it was me.
Speaker: Don't listen to him, Kevin.
Speaker: It was terrible.
Speaker: That's the semi-antagonist relationship that I...
Speaker: It's what's kept us friends for 10 years.
Speaker: We met in a comedy writing workshop in which we had to tell each other our jokes were terrible, basically.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I think that's only improved your material.
Speaker: I imagine it's, it's a situation where you either like get to be friends forever or you burn the entire city you live in.
Speaker: There's only four of us in the class.
Speaker: I forget the other kid's name.
Speaker: I mean, it was Lee.
Speaker: One kid was really, really young, but it was for, for comedy script writing television, comedy script writing.
Speaker: And it was just like, we would each bring a script in a pilot script and
Speaker: And we would read it out loud and it was just us taking turns saying like, no, this joke doesn't work.
Speaker: You should probably do a different joke.
Speaker: Not going to play, man.
Speaker: It's not going to play.
Speaker: It's not going to play in the Midwest.
Speaker: We workshopped in the same manner that Mega Man really should have considered.
Speaker: Could have used a second pair of eyes.
Speaker: Yeah, Dr. Light.
Speaker: He could have bounced.
Speaker: Dr. Light, before I go in there and kill Airman, I was wondering if I could bounce a few things off.
Speaker: Yeah, I've got some material I've been working on.
Speaker: I've been working on.
Speaker: I'd love to just.
Speaker: If I said that I rocked him like a hurricane, do you think people would get there?
Speaker: Mega Man's working on his tight five for the comedy store.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Oh yeah, exactly.
Speaker: So yeah, Mega Man defeats a weird green alien thing.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Which was a mirage as he puts it, which, which is frankly real weird.
Speaker: I remember it just being like, what's, I just remember it being like a robot of that Dr. Wiley used, but I guess it's a, sure.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Sure.
Speaker: Dr. Wily created a mirage to scare Mega Man, but Mega Man had destroyed it with bubble.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It sounds like an advertisement for bubble.
Speaker: It sure does.
Speaker: Bubble.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Take care of all your alien mirages game.
Speaker: And then it ends with a game hint to get to heat man.
Speaker: Use the sea weapon to cut through the wall.
Speaker: I think we all know what the sea weapon is.
Speaker: Don't we, boys?
Speaker: Huh?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: My fiance is going to leave me.
Speaker: I was like cycling through C words in my head to be like, what?
Speaker: I was like, what's the funniest?
Speaker: Not, not what you're trying to say, but what's the funniest other C word I could come up with?
Speaker: I had nothing.
Speaker: My brain dumped every word that starts with C out of my, out of existence, out of my memory.
Speaker: And I couldn't think of anything.
Speaker: For future reference, Scott, the word is calico.
Speaker: Calico.
Speaker: That's a great one.
Speaker: Isn't that is that technically what what your cat one of your cats is?
Speaker: That's Ripley.
Speaker: Ripley is a dilute calico.
Speaker: There you go.
Speaker: A very fat dilute calico.
Speaker: Chapter 21, we get a little denouement, a little falling action here.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Dr. Wily's defeated.
Speaker: The end.
Speaker: The end.
Speaker: What happens next?
Speaker: What happens next?
Speaker: Mega Man is thanked profusely.
Speaker: Dr. Light.
Speaker: And Dr. Light offers to turn him back into a robot, which I imagine would only be a real gory, like, prolonged and painful operation.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: The way things are going, he'd offer to turn them into a robot and then clone them instead.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It finally works.
Speaker: That's exactly what would happen.
Speaker: He'd just end up with two.
Speaker: He'd be like, let me put you into this robo transometer with turning back into robot capabilities.
Speaker: And then it would be the cloning one.
Speaker: Oh man, I mislabeled those.
Speaker: And then like a little fly goes into it and out comes Jeff Goldblum.
Speaker: That's right.
Speaker: That's how we get him.
Speaker: That's how we get.
Speaker: It starts.
Speaker: Brindle fly.
Speaker: Brindle mega man.
Speaker: And that's and then and here's here's another is our literal final moment.
Speaker: of clearly this was just the writer watching someone beat this game.
Speaker: The final moment that she's describing of him, he's going back to his like farm in the mountain valley or whatever, and he's and it has him describing like,
Speaker: thinking about how beautiful it looks in the winter when the snow falls and in the fall when the leaves turn golden and red and summer and green.
Speaker: And that is literally the ending credits of the game is Mega Man walking.
Speaker: And the trees are changing from winter to fall.
Speaker: Like that's literally the ending of the game.
Speaker: And again, and as Kevin pointed out before, the music kicks ass.
Speaker: It's it's a really lovely ending theme.
Speaker: And Mega Man's human forever now.
Speaker: He's human forever now.
Speaker: It's canon.
Speaker: According to this book.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Until Mega Man 3.
Speaker: Until Mega Man 3.
Speaker: And then, dear reader, I hope you like reading Mega Man 2.
Speaker: Read some Robert Heinlein or Isaac Asimov.
Speaker: Here's the whole list.
Speaker: Here's the whole list.
Speaker: The Forgotten Door by Alexander Key.
Speaker: Have Spacesuit Will Travel by Robert Heinlein.
Speaker: How to Eat Fried Worms by Thomas Rockwell.
Speaker: I Robot by Isaac Asimov.
Speaker: My Robot Buddy by Alfred Sloat and The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster.
Speaker: You can find these books at your local library or bookstore.
Speaker: Ask your teacher or librarian for other books you might enjoy.
Speaker: Best wishes.
Speaker: FX9.
Speaker: Because that's legally the way you have to say that.
Speaker: You have to do it that way.
Speaker: They will get you.
Speaker: Oops, you don't have a library.
Speaker: Their funding has been cut.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And then the very last thing is it does end with a Nintendo Game Boy Compact Video Game System giveaway.
Speaker: So you could get a Game Boy.
Speaker: I think we have a shot.
Speaker: I think we have a shot.
Speaker: I want to see if there's a... Because there's 10 grand prize winners.
Speaker: I bet they still have at least three or four of them.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Entries must be postmarked by November 5th, 1990.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: We can do that.
Speaker: Fill in the coupon below or write the information on a three by five piece of paper and mail to Worlds of Power giveaway.
Speaker: That's only 32 years ago.
Speaker: Yeah, the good news is if we don't get the first place, there are at least 25 second prize winners.
Speaker: Yeah, well, yeah, there are 10 grand prize winners.
Speaker: There are three of us.
Speaker: I feel like one of us is a pretty good shot.
Speaker: The odds are in our favor.
Speaker: And a cool video game carrying case, which I'm going to be honest with you guys, sounds a little vague.
Speaker: I think it sounds better.
Speaker: I think it sounds better.
Speaker: What could it be?
Speaker: One of those cases that you could put all your Nintendo cartridges in.
Speaker: I like it.
Speaker: Made it out of masking tape and jeans.
Speaker: I like it.
Speaker: I think you just have to break into the post office and get one of those little stampy things that postmarks it and you just postmark it
Speaker: for before November 5th, 1990.
Speaker: And you're set.
Speaker: Do it yourself.
Speaker: Legally.
Speaker: Yeah, you're all set.
Speaker: They have to at least consider it.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Aside from breaking into a government building, you're legally in the clear, right?
Speaker: You're fine.
Speaker: You're fine.
Speaker: And if you're not justified by law, you're justified in the eyes of God.
Speaker: Let's face facts.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: That's a moral right thing to do.
Speaker: Also, in the eyes of Dr. Light, you're fine.
Speaker: In the eyes of Dr. Light.
Speaker: Yeah, well, yeah, Dr. Light.
Speaker: Now, the most important question for this, is Mega Man a cop?
Speaker: Well, he's human, so that can't be.
Speaker: I'm gonna get shot.
Speaker: Now, I do a little thing.
Speaker: You guys are reading the PDFs.
Speaker: I don't know if the back cover is on your insurance.
Speaker: Oh, it sure is.
Speaker: Oh, it sure is.
Speaker: This book, can I tell you?
Speaker: I love this.
Speaker: You can do your thing.
Speaker: No, I bet you're going to point out what I'm going to point out.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: Because the back cover also of this specific PDF that we have also tells me what price this book was sold for.
Speaker: Which is $4.20.
Speaker: $4.20, baby.
Speaker: $4.20.
Speaker: Air horns.
Speaker: Yeah, throw that in in post.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Mine was $2.95.
Speaker: Oh, you got a much better deal.
Speaker: I'm upset about that.
Speaker: No, on the back, they're telling the story.
Speaker: You got the back summary thing.
Speaker: And we get an early guilt.
Speaker: How did you make it happen?
Speaker: That's all I got on the built-in sound effects.
Speaker: Amazing.
Speaker: I think that's really the only thing that's missing from this show is a soundboard.
Speaker: I mean, there is a soundboard.
Speaker: It just, like...
Speaker: That's good.
Speaker: That's good.
Speaker: I need that in my daily life, really.
Speaker: So here's another reference that might age the fuck out of me.
Speaker: But we get some early Gilligan's Island vibes here.
Speaker: where I'll just read this.
Speaker: I'll just read the summary on the back.
Speaker: Only our robot superhero can save the universe from evil.
Speaker: Dr. Wily and his gang.
Speaker: They're the toughest, baddest robots ever made.
Speaker: Can Mega Man defeat Flash Man, Crash Man, Bubble Man and the rest?
Speaker: I don't know if you guys knew the Gilligan's Island theme song, you know, did not used to end with the movie star, the professor and Marianne.
Speaker: It used to end and the rest.
Speaker: There's not that many characters.
Speaker: And the Professor and Mariette were like, what the fuck?
Speaker: Yeah, there's not that many characters in the show.
Speaker: There's like leaving two characters off.
Speaker: They literally left two characters off, and the ending they came up with was way better.
Speaker: So I couldn't help but read this.
Speaker: It was like, Flashman, Crashman, Bobo Man, and the rest.
Speaker: What?
Speaker: And they didn't even go with like the best ones.
Speaker: They get Metal Man.
Speaker: Metal Man is referenced almost every page.
Speaker: Metal Man.
Speaker: It's like Metal Man did all the work himself.
Speaker: Let's be honest.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Where would Metal Man crawl?
Speaker: Exactly.
Speaker: And I agree with you because I was reading this and I was like, you're trying to sell this as like a really cool, interesting adventure story.
Speaker: And one of the villains you're going with is Bubble Man.
Speaker: Like you're going to sell it on Bubble Man.
Speaker: Bubbles are, for the target audience of this book, I'd say bubbles are probably kind of lame.
Speaker: Probably.
Speaker: You might get a little crossover, but not much.
Speaker: Not enough.
Speaker: Personally, I like bubbles.
Speaker: Did they take Mega Man's and go away from them?
Speaker: Oh yeah, who doesn't like bubbles?
Speaker: Who among us?
Speaker: Who among us?
Speaker: Who does not like bubbles?
Speaker: Cast the first.
Speaker: I mean, come on.
Speaker: Also bubble.
Speaker: Bubble.
Speaker: Oh, they sure did.
Speaker: Okay, here you go.
Speaker: Censorship at work, ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker: The cover of Worlds of Power, Mega Man 2, they have removed the gun.
Speaker: Oh my God, I just noticed that.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He's just kind of showing them his fist, whereas in the actual cover of Mega Man 2, the original Capcom game, he's firing a gun at Quick Man and missing.
Speaker: He missed.
Speaker: He's just pointing a fist at Quick Man.
Speaker: He's not that mega.
Speaker: He's not that mega.
Speaker: Final thoughts on Mega Man 2.
Speaker: Boy, we did cover to cover on this book, huh?
Speaker: We sure did.
Speaker: We did.
Speaker: Yes, sir.
Speaker: I liked it.
Speaker: I thought it was fun.
Speaker: It's not... Is it the best book of all time?
Speaker: Was it a New York Times bestseller?
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: Probably...
Speaker: probably I didn't do the research I was not tasked with anything other than reading this book but I thought it was a very fun read if I was the target audience for this book if I was you know a couple years younger uh
Speaker: just a couple years younger i'm still i'm still i'm still very youthful 20 27 yeah if i was the target audience at 27 years old i would love this book i think it's great it's very it's it's super quick i think that's the thing that i like about it it is yeah it's just action from from beginning to end uh it's very fun uh there's it leaves me it leaves me wanting more
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Like it makes me think I wish I wish there was a longer version of this story that dove into the depths of of Mega Man.
Speaker: Is that this?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: This is like the abridged version.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I have to believe that that's a fan.
Speaker: Oh, I got to be like it's someone.
Speaker: I mean, I'll tell you what, if nothing else, this book makes me want to play the video game.
Speaker: There you go.
Speaker: If that's its job, then like it sold me on it.
Speaker: I want to play it.
Speaker: And the Mega Man 2 is kind of by most people I know, widely accepted, at least in the early 8 bit generation of Mega Man games.
Speaker: Two is generally lauded as like the best.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: followed closely and sometimes switched up with three, which was always my favorite.
Speaker: But yeah, I mean, honestly, you know, if you get a, you know, hell on a switch or something like that, you can get the Mega Man collection.
Speaker: It goes on sale all the damn time for like 10 bucks.
Speaker: I mean, I want to.
Speaker: This was fun.
Speaker: This was my very first experience really with with at least the story of Mega Man.
Speaker: Like I said, I'd heard the music before and it's awesome, but
Speaker: Story-wise, this is like my first little toe dipping into it.
Speaker: When you get to when you play the game, you can listen to the music when you're playing the game.
Speaker: That's cool.
Speaker: It's kind of one of the best.
Speaker: Do I have to like set up?
Speaker: Do I have to like download anything else or is it just already in there?
Speaker: No, it's already in there.
Speaker: That's a great thing.
Speaker: Oh my gosh.
Speaker: That's amazing.
Speaker: It's so cool.
Speaker: Technology.
Speaker: It is.
Speaker: We live in a... You buy a Mega Man 2 album and you get a game with it.
Speaker: That's... That's a good deal.
Speaker: That's I honestly think that that's how we need to think of it.
Speaker: You buy the Mega Man soundtrack and it comes with a game.
Speaker: It's great stuff.
Speaker: What did you two think of this book?
Speaker: Did you like it?
Speaker: Does it live up to the standards of books that you normally review on the show?
Speaker: Absolutely not.
Speaker: It's probably it's it's well, it might be better than Dead Space.
Speaker: Maybe.
Speaker: Maybe.
Speaker: Yeah, a little better.
Speaker: Because because at least this one was meant to sound like it was meant.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Yes, that's true.
Speaker: That is true.
Speaker: Dead Space just seemed like it was just straight up incompetence.
Speaker: Oh, poor Dead Space.
Speaker: Yeah, no, I it's like it's like it was fun.
Speaker: There's a few laugh out loud moments for me.
Speaker: And you know what?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: That's that's all I can really ask for.
Speaker: And in an afternoon of of reading, you know, in between meetings is just like this.
Speaker: Yeah, it sent me sent me to the giggles a few times as I reread a few.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I agree.
Speaker: I think I think what it lacks in competence as a book is it makes up for in the sense that, like, yeah, it's this sounds like this sounds like a read, but it's like it's like it's short.
Speaker: But like, but like, like in a good way, like, like you can, you can read it.
Speaker: I literally think it took me all told like 45 minutes or an hour.
Speaker: It's quick, man.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's like, like the, it made me nostalgic.
Speaker: It made me nostalgic for being, you know, because I agree with you, Scott.
Speaker: I think if I had read this as a kid, I probably would have loved it.
Speaker: And, you know, because I loved Mega Man, so I would have I would have devoured it.
Speaker: But so it gives you and then you've got the neat ads in the book and stuff like actually buying the damn thing was.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: We don't have any ads other than the thing at the very end.
Speaker: Yeah, it's it's just neat.
Speaker: It's just neat.
Speaker: neat thing and now knowing that it's totally unauthorized.
Speaker: That's the extra layer on the cake, you know?
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: That's like in Bake Off when they're like, I'm adding cardamom to this recipe and I'm like, I don't know what flavor you're going for with... I don't know what the fuck you're doing here, but you just asked me if I want a splinter, so I'm intrigued.
Speaker: Do you think Nintendo was okay with it because it ends with a giveaway where they definitely had to buy at least 10 Game Boys?
Speaker: It had to buy a lot.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: At least the 10 Game Boys.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I think I, to be completely honest, you know, there's, there's a, there was a, there was a lot of questioning, for example, of like, uh,
Speaker: Nintendo in that age.
Speaker: That was from a joke that was made about six or seven minutes ago.
Speaker: It's on a delay.
Speaker: I was queuing up that for like in case somebody made a joke later and then it just auto-played.
Speaker: And it just went.
Speaker: Oh, there were a lot of like religious games and like that.
Speaker: Nintendo didn't didn't like that.
Speaker: And you know, they didn't want I did a whole video on my YouTube channel about, you know, Christian video games and Nintendo.
Speaker: A lot of that starts with wisdom tree and all that stuff, which were games that beat out the lockout system in Nintendo.
Speaker: which was not illegal, but Nintendo was pretty pissed about.
Speaker: And and there were a lot of things that Nintendo could have done to like sue Wisdom Tree and obliterate them, basically.
Speaker: But it would have been a lot of work and it probably wouldn't have.
Speaker: It wouldn't have looked good on their ends because they want to look like a family entertainment kind of thing.
Speaker: And I bet this falls under that umbrella on a certain level.
Speaker: They're just like, ugh, like it's their kids books.
Speaker: Do we really want to be the people who stomped on these people who are making kids books?
Speaker: Yeah, it's kids books.
Speaker: It's scholastic, you know, like, yeah.
Speaker: Now, if it had been an American company, the story would have been very, 100%.
Speaker: Yeah, but the Japanese were like, ugh, whatever.
Speaker: So, Scott, do you have anything you want to plug?
Speaker: apparently not according to my memory.
Speaker: We know that you're not on any shows, Scott.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Hey, if you podcast listener like podcasts, I have one called it's probably not aliens.
Speaker: It's a podcast all about debunking ancient aliens claims like the history channel show, ancient aliens and talking about the real world history behind the places and the people and the objects that's
Speaker: that create these conspiracies, but the real life history is so much cooler.
Speaker: So I do that with my buddy Tristan from Step Back.
Speaker: He has a YouTube channel.
Speaker: I also have a YouTube channel.
Speaker: It's called NerdSync if you're into that sort of thing.
Speaker: But that's basically everything, I think, for me.
Speaker: Cool.
Speaker: Cool.
Speaker: And yes.
Speaker: And Phil, you're still doing your, your videos every week.
Speaker: I am.
Speaker: I do, I do game reviews on YouTube at El Conquista Dork, which is Spanish for the Conquista Dork.
Speaker: You can find this up.
Speaker: You could use the rim shot.
Speaker: What the.
Speaker: We had it.
Speaker: It was ready.
Speaker: Would have been ready.
Speaker: Hold on a lot.
Speaker: Let's take that back.
Speaker: Let's roll that back a little bit.
Speaker: Yeah, let's try it again.
Speaker: Let's take that again.
Speaker: Yeah, that's it's a it's a Spanish for the conquistador.
Speaker: That's for it.
Speaker: We'll tighten that up.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Love it.
Speaker: We'll fix them in post.
Speaker: I've got I don't know what the actual review will be coming out.
Speaker: But yeah, Friday, Friday mornings, we got reviews.
Speaker: We're wrapping up one that's coming out as of this recording.
Speaker: I've got one coming out for lawn mowing simulator, which tells you the kind of exciting games that I fill my life with.
Speaker: Just real dad games.
Speaker: that's, that's what I, it's what has become for me now.
Speaker: I just play dad games now.
Speaker: Dad games and dead spaces.
Speaker: Well, thanks everybody for listening.
Speaker: If you want to help the show out, please share.
Speaker: on Twitter or your social media network of choice, go ahead, scroll to the bottom of the, the Apple playback and rate us five stars.
Speaker: It's a five stars, not four stars.
Speaker: Don't do four stars.
Speaker: That was a mistake by me.
Speaker: That was it.
Speaker: You guys rolled with that one for a while.
Speaker: Five stars only.
Speaker: Five stars only, please.
Speaker: And tell your friends, tell your family, tell your enemies, tell the hummingbird that's outside your window about us.
Speaker: It really helps to spread the word.
Speaker: It really helps us get our numbers up and to the right on the chart.
Speaker: And I really feel satisfaction when they go up to the right.
Speaker: As opposed to back and to the left.
Speaker: Yeah, so we will not be JFK-ing.
Speaker: We will be going up and to the right.
Speaker: And we're going to live forever!
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And he looked around.
Speaker: There was a giant W right above him.
Speaker: That's the thing that I screencapped.
Speaker: I think at this point, Mega Man would say something like in the next intermission with Dr. Light, out of nowhere, he's just going to say, now let's see Paul Allen's card.
Speaker: I can't believe he prefers Paul Allen's card to mine.
Speaker: Oh no, chapter 11 is business card man.
Speaker: That is true, it fits quite well.
Speaker: The taste... The tasteful thickness.
Speaker: Oh my god, is that a better mark?
Speaker: Oh my god, we were just talking about a lot of white coloring.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Oh my god.
Speaker: Oh, it's always in vogue.
Speaker: Oh, it's so good.
Speaker: But you know what else is in vogue is, hey there, everybody, welcome to Pixel... No, I already did that.
Speaker: We're already into it.
Speaker: You did that.
Speaker: You did that.
Speaker: This is the longest intro ever.
Speaker: Are we doing a double episode?
Speaker: This is the longest intro ever.
Speaker: You didn't even know.
Speaker: We have to, if it's a good intro, you do it three times.
Speaker: You do it, you intro, yeah, the episode several times.
Speaker: It's pretty stellar.
Speaker: It's a rookie mistake to miss that opportunity.
Speaker: Yeah, so chapter 12 is, there's lava everywhere.
Speaker: There's lava because he's in Heat Man's world, and he's using his jet ski.
Speaker: Yeah, who gave him the jet ski?
Speaker: Was it Airman?
Speaker: He stole it from Airman.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So he's so he's about now they do have a cliffhanger.
Speaker: They end one chapter on him about to fall into a river of lava.
Speaker: And literally on the way down, he goes, oh, wait, my jet ski.
Speaker: So while he's falling, he has the that he has the wherewithal.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: To take the jet ski out of his backpack and just like assemble it into jet ski formation and land before land, get on it before he lands in the lava.
Speaker: And because it's not a real jet ski, it's a floating jet ski.
Speaker: It's not jet skiing.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's like on a puff of air.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I do want to say this is this chapter has one of my other favorite lines of this book, which is when he first gets here, it's obviously like super, super hot.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: This this environment that he's in.
Speaker: And so we get a paragraph that says, but as he knew all too well by now, Mega Man wasn't a robot anymore.
Speaker: He was human and he was hot.
Speaker: That's what it says.
Speaker: He was human and he was hot.
Speaker: He was hot.
Speaker: He was, read that as you want.
Speaker: I mean.
Speaker: I mean, temperature, maybe.
Speaker: Maybe.
Speaker: That's something.
Speaker: He was also sexy.
Speaker: He's a very sexy human.
Speaker: We covered earlier the specific length of one of his appendages.
Speaker: So, yeah.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: It's there.
Speaker: Read between the lines.
Speaker: He's a very sexy human.
Speaker: It's hot.
Speaker: he's probably gonna need to take off that suit.
Speaker: He's got to.
Speaker: I mean.
Speaker: And then chapter 12 starts and oh, he is totally naked.
Speaker: And this just becomes.
Speaker: It just new.
Speaker: This is the point at which it spirals off into like its own, like a fan fiction.
Speaker: It becomes real challenging for the young readers, I think.
Speaker: That's right.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: There is there is congressional hearings over this book in Congress.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: That's that's why.
Speaker: So that's why it's out of 1989.
Speaker: Puritans.
Speaker: Fucking Puritans.
Speaker: So he's on his jet.
Speaker: He's on it.
Speaker: So he's on his jet ski.
Speaker: He's on his jet ski.
Speaker: If you know what I mean.
Speaker: And he's making his way.
Speaker: blows up a wall to get through it with the crash bombs.
Speaker: And then we are treated to like another really fast, a really fast moment here.
Speaker: It's a weird bit.
Speaker: I'm not normally one to get on top of people over their formatting, by the way.
Speaker: But we have a paragraph ending with a quote.
Speaker: Can you take the heat, Mega Man?
Speaker: And a new paragraph starts and it says Heat Man Paul.
Speaker: So
Speaker: So it's like some, nobody said that.
Speaker: That was just set.
Speaker: Maybe that could have been, we don't know who said that.
Speaker: And then Heat Man, Heat Man called.
Speaker: Yeah, Heat Man called unrelated to what you just read.
Speaker: Nothing to do with it.
Speaker: He was wondering if he had his half of the red.
Speaker: And I love and I love this description.
Speaker: The armor surrounded him like a huge box with a lid that could snap shut when he pulled his head inside.
Speaker: He looked like a square.
Speaker: Yes, I laughed so hard at that.
Speaker: He looked like a square turtle.
Speaker: Are they throwing shade?
Speaker: Like it's- Am I supposed to be scared?
Speaker: Am I supposed to laugh?
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: So the great thing about this is that they are, they're tap dancing so hard around the fact that Heat Man is shaped like a Zippo.
Speaker: Yeah, he's a cigarette lighter.
Speaker: He's a cigarette lighter.
Speaker: Yeah, they couldn't say that in a kid's book.
Speaker: They can't say that in a kid's book.
Speaker: No.
Speaker: square turtle he's a looks like a square turtle and he put his head in a huge box mm-hmm that's silly he's just an ordinary robot there's a wacky no no no you should have called him hot turtle man a little hot pixelated amphibian he's just a warm tortoise turtle
Speaker: So we get what is probably the most pitiful fight scene in this entire book, and that's saying something.
Speaker: He throws some fireballs at Mega Man, and this is the entire fight.
Speaker: Are you ready?
Speaker: Mega Man's eyebrows were singed.
Speaker: His uniform was smoking, but he didn't give up.
Speaker: Blam!
Speaker: Boom!
Speaker: Pow!
Speaker: Finally, it was over.
Speaker: Finally!
Speaker: Which... Finally!
Speaker: I mean, they gave us three sound effects.
Speaker: Usually they give us two.
Speaker: That was so long.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I'm just going to have to contact Ms.
Speaker: Ellen Miles and ask for a little bit of royalties because I never gave her permission to describe my lovemaking style.
Speaker: Bam, blam, boom, pow.
Speaker: Finally, it was over.
Speaker: Finally, it was over.
Speaker: A great national nightmare.
Speaker: That's not cool, man.
Speaker: That ought to cool your jets, said Mega Man, while pissing on the corpse of Heat Man.
Speaker: Heat Man wasn't such hot stuff.
Speaker: Now that he was human, he had urine after all.
Speaker: Oh my goodness.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: And he immediately has a second one, doesn't he?
Speaker: He's just workshopping at this point.
Speaker: He's just trying.
Speaker: He really is.
Speaker: He, man, wasn't such hot stuff.
Speaker: But I'm sure glad to be out of that furnace, which is not really a thing.
Speaker: No.
Speaker: So we're getting down to the end.
Speaker: We don't have many left, but...
Speaker: It was a missed opportunity to start this whole chapter by saying like, but Mega Man said, oh boy, out of the frying pan and into the fire.
Speaker: Oh, see.
Speaker: Could have been good.
Speaker: See, you should be writing this.
Speaker: You're right.
Speaker: You can sit down with me and Kevin and we'll play through Mega Man 2 and you can write what you see.
Speaker: That sounds good to me.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And that is a dynamite way to make a book.
Speaker: You do, I think legally you have to play it in a different order than this book.
Speaker: Because I think they, yeah.
Speaker: Probably.
Speaker: Well, you know what?
Speaker: We'll just go, we'll go ahead.
Speaker: You know, they didn't do one.
Speaker: They did two.
Speaker: Let's skip three and do four.
Speaker: What if it was a choose your own adventure book?
Speaker: You can do it in whatever order you want.
Speaker: They did do Nintendo Choose Your Own Adventure books.
Speaker: Did they?
Speaker: They sure did.
Speaker: They sure did.
Speaker: And I'm trying to get a hold of several of them.
Speaker: eBay is a bitch.
Speaker: Somebody's got to keep Phil away from eBay because... Oh, I have the same problem, bud.
Speaker: I've got a wall of wine and an eBay account, and it's become a problem.
Speaker: Oh, I know it.
Speaker: I know it.
Speaker: I've so we get our now that I know that Nintendo didn't sign off on this.
Speaker: The next chapter's unauthorized likeness makes a lot more sense because we end up in Woodman's level and he meets Robo Rabbit who says, what's up, Doc?
Speaker: Before firing carrot shaped missiles at him.
Speaker: Mm hmm.
Speaker: They're just gonna steal everything that isn't nailed to the floor, aren't they?
Speaker: Why not?
Speaker: Why not?
Speaker: Such a minor critique for me, because this book has other things going on, but there are... You know what, Scott?
Speaker: You may have just... You may have just nailed this entire book's problem right there.
Speaker: But the line is, what's up, Doc?
Speaker: And it said to...
Speaker: It said two Mega Man.
Speaker: There are two other characters in this book who are legitimately doctors.
Speaker: That's a very good point.
Speaker: And Mega Man is not one of them.
Speaker: Mega Man only Mega Man has an MFA, which is a terminal degree, but not a guy.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: MFA havers.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's we we have to remind we have to remind everyone terminal degree.
Speaker: It's a terminal degree.
Speaker: There is no doctorate for film production.
Speaker: So basically a Ph.D. Yeah.
Speaker: You know, I could be a professor if I wanted to.
Speaker: I don't want to.
Speaker: We get we get.
Speaker: And by the way, we get another one of Mega Man's just fucking patented zingers.
Speaker: He shoots a metal blade and says, try this on Versailles, you silly bunny.
Speaker: At this point, I imagine he's saying things, but he's not saying it like upbeat.
Speaker: He's just saying, no, he is fuming right now.
Speaker: Try this.
Speaker: Try this on Versailles, you silly bunny.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He's had enough.
Speaker: He's had enough.
Speaker: He's basically, he's, he's basically Anton Chiguring his way through.
Speaker: He goes up, he's going to go up to Woodman later and say, what's the most you've ever lost on a bet?
Speaker: Don't, don't go away now, rabbit.
Speaker: You, you miss your lucky quarter.
Speaker: You miss your lucky quarter.
Speaker: I do.
Speaker: I do that every now and then to my fiance and I, I think she's going to hit me with a baseball bat one day.
Speaker: I like, no, don't, don't, don't leave it there.
Speaker: It's your lucky quarter.
Speaker: Put it back in your pocket.
Speaker: She's like, I'm going to fucking kill you if you don't stop that.
Speaker: They may he makes his way to Woodman and this comes to this comes to the first.
Speaker: I don't know what this sentence is.
Speaker: I don't know what this is.
Speaker: He finds Woodman.
Speaker: I'm just going to read Woodman stood waiting his leaf shield at the ready.
Speaker: Wanna splinter Mega Man?
Speaker: Wanna splinter.
Speaker: What the fuck does that mean?
Speaker: Is that like a pun?
Speaker: Is that scissoring?
Speaker: What is he talking about?
Speaker: Cause it's not want a splint.
Speaker: Like, do you want a splinter?
Speaker: It's wanna splinter as in like, do you, would you like to, do you want to splinter with me, Mega Man?
Speaker: Yes, splintering is an action.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Which, yeah, splintering is splitting, but.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: That's a stretch, man.
Speaker: Like that's a real, that one needed a minute.
Speaker: You could have taken five minutes.
Speaker: It's a wood.
Speaker: There are so many species of tree.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You could have gone with?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Son of a birch.
Speaker: You know?
Speaker: That would have been good.
Speaker: That would have been pretty good.
Speaker: They wouldn't have let that happen.
Speaker: No, they would not have let that slide.
Speaker: Make like a tree, Mega Man, and leave, and then he shoots the leaf shields.
Speaker: That's good.
Speaker: That's actually- You're the root of all my problems, Mega Man.
Speaker: Oh my gosh.
Speaker: We have to write one of these books.
Speaker: We're nailing it.
Speaker: We're nailing this.
Speaker: I'm one of those guys whose bark isn't worse than his bite or something like that.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Or is worse.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: One of the two.
Speaker: You know what I'm saying?
Speaker: I'm just spitballing.
Speaker: Just like Mega Man.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Just like Mega Man.
Speaker: So so we get but that is followed, by the way, by the death of Woodman.
Speaker: And what is possibly Mega Man's most homicidal victory sentence?
Speaker: You'll make a lovely footstool.
Speaker: You'll make a lovely footstool.
Speaker: You'll make a lovely footstool, Woodman.
Speaker: He is, yeah, he's becoming more, like, he starts off this book as a human, so you'd think that would give him empathy and things like, it is all God.
Speaker: He is a war-torn, like, he is just grizzled as all can be.
Speaker: I think I figured it out, because it does say in the beginning that the whole thing... He's programmed to be good.
Speaker: He's programmed to think nothing but goodness, and now he's ready to make a lampshade out of Dr. Wyderby.
Speaker: Like, he's just...
Speaker: This is, it all makes so much sense.
Speaker: Given the freedom to think whatever he wants, he has become Ed Gein.
Speaker: Ed Gein, yeah.
Speaker: Destroying Woodman was as easy as falling off a log, crowed Mega Man.
Speaker: I don't understand that.
Speaker: Is that a thing?
Speaker: Falling off a log.
Speaker: It's as easy as falling off a log.
Speaker: I, I, it is.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I mean, it's, it is like, it is so country saying that I wouldn't be surprised if she literally had a book of idioms that she was referencing as she did this.
Speaker: That feels, that feels like very Georgia or something.
Speaker: It is.
Speaker: It's, it's, it's kind of a redneck thing to say, but not even redneck, but like country, it's just country.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So he's officially killed all but one of the super robots, Quick Man.
Speaker: And this level is so...
Speaker: weird to me now, Scott, this is if you never having played the game, they, they, uh, litterized, I suppose.
Speaker: I don't know how to put this a moment in the game where you're literally falling through a pit.
Speaker: And as you're falling, there are these like laser lights that shoot past you.
Speaker: And usually it's either easy to dodge.
Speaker: They're nothing major, but they make this dude,
Speaker: sound.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And they, and that's something that me as a writer, I would have been like, well, that's not going in the book.
Speaker: That's just silly.
Speaker: But no, we get it.
Speaker: We get it.
Speaker: We get it.
Speaker: We get it.
Speaker: We get a lot of flooshes.
Speaker: Yeah, a lot of flooshes.
Speaker: A lot of them.
Speaker: Like this, it takes up like a half a page.
Speaker: I mean, if we were going to get all of this, like all of these onomatopoeias and action words, I really wish this was like,
Speaker: written by somebody like Stan Lee, because I think his tone of just being over the top would have really matched.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: He probably would have handled it pretty well.
Speaker: You would feel the floooshes, you know?
Speaker: Right, right.
Speaker: With visceral food.
Speaker: Now, at the end of this chapter, we get two things that I noticed that were kind of weird.
Speaker: First, suddenly we're measuring in feet now.
Speaker: It was talking about how short he was.
Speaker: Someone's taller than him.
Speaker: It's all very vague.
Speaker: But then we get a mean looking robot with flames shooting out of the top of his head.
Speaker: He was about three feet tall and he was wearing a tuxedo.
Speaker: It was hot.
Speaker: It was hot.
Speaker: And he didn't look like he was about to move aside for Mega Man.
Speaker: That's the end of the chapter.
Speaker: It sounds like they've got history.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It was hot.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It was hothead.
Speaker: It was hothead.
Speaker: Oh, fuck.
Speaker: It's hot.
Speaker: I thought he'd be hanging out with Crash Man, you know?
Speaker: So this is where Crash Man is.
Speaker: Listen, his.
Speaker: His name might be sexually accurate, but that doesn't mean we were good together.
Speaker: So
Speaker: Were you going in such a hurry, his hothead?
Speaker: Cool your jets, chill out.
Speaker: Which, that's a weird thing for a character called Hothead to... Yeah, back to back, cool your jets, chill out.
Speaker: Yeah, that is, they're not even following.
Speaker: They're just, if they're, here's the thing.
Speaker: If your writer doesn't care enough to get the puns correct for the theme of the character, why should we care?
Speaker: Why should we care?
Speaker: Because goddammit, somebody's gotta care.
Speaker: That's more.
Speaker: We get more of them.
Speaker: We get more fooshes.
Speaker: Somebody's got to care about those fooshes.
Speaker: Until he freezes them in time using this time freezer thing that he got earlier, which you probably could have been using.
Speaker: Yeah, the time stopper.
Speaker: You could have been using it the entire time.
Speaker: Could have been.
Speaker: Oh, absolutely.
Speaker: And so he fights Quick Man.
Speaker: And this is hilarious, by the way, because she refers to Quick Man as a horned robot.
Speaker: He has horns on his head.
Speaker: They're boomerangs.
Speaker: He has a boomerang on his head.
Speaker: Yeah, this is the one on the cover.
Speaker: The other one on the cover.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And he throws them and they go and they come back.
Speaker: Like, it's pretty obvious he's throwing boomerangs.
Speaker: Why is he called Quick Man if he throws boomerangs?
Speaker: It is a little weird.
Speaker: Like they, they, if there's one thing I would criticize for some of the later Mega Man villains is that they got really, really hyper specific to a point that was kind of silly.
Speaker: And with, but in these early days, oh boy, they were, they were playing fast and loose.
Speaker: Let's just say.
Speaker: That's not related to anything.
Speaker: I just saw this phrase and I'm going to screenshot it because it's now going to be a fantastic little meme to use on twitter.com.
Speaker: There we go.
Speaker: There's this paragraph that says, he looked around.
Speaker: There was a giant W right above him.
Speaker: That's what I'm going to use that whenever I have a little personal victory.
Speaker: That's a great idea.
Speaker: That's going to be for old Scott.
Speaker: That's a screenshot.
Speaker: That's a W for old Scotty boy.
Speaker: For ol' Scotty boy.
Speaker: Oh man, but uh, Quick Man, um, uh, Quick Man, he jumps around pretty fast, I guess that's quick.
Speaker: Yeah, that's kind of his thing, he jumps around.
Speaker: The other thing is, like, if you use the time stop thing on him, he just, like, dies.
Speaker: that's in the game.
Speaker: Oh, like instant.
Speaker: Not like instant, but you like stop time and it like just drains his health all the way down because.
Speaker: Oh, cool.
Speaker: He's like.
Speaker: Yeah, I guess the idea is if he can't be quick, then he dies.
Speaker: Basically, if he stops moving, he dies or something like that.
Speaker: He's a shark.
Speaker: I was about to say the same thing.
Speaker: He's a shark.
Speaker: Call him Shark Man.
Speaker: And you're his Quint.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I guess I slowed you down quick, man.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah 100 robots went into the water 50 robots came out Anyway, we delivered them quick quick man bites into his like he's not even living until he bites into you Okay, okay, I'm gonna tell this story because I have to please
Speaker: I my fiance last year had admitted to me she had never seen Jaws before.
Speaker: It's one of my favorite movies.
Speaker: So I freak out because as a child and this is not a good thing, but it tells you something about my childhood.
Speaker: Quint was one of my role models for manhood.
Speaker: Not a good thing, but it makes sense.
Speaker: And
Speaker: So we watched it and the Indianapolis speech is coming up and I'm not I don't I'm not going to be.
Speaker: You know, it was like I was like, I'm not going to be one of those boyfriends who like like just goes just like, so this is really important.
Speaker: This is big moment.
Speaker: She got to do this.
Speaker: I've seen it happen.
Speaker: I've seen other friends like do that to their girlfriends and they ruin the movie for them.
Speaker: And, you know, the opposite effect instead of loving the thing, they they they actually kind of like dislike it because they were kind of forced.
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: So I'm just play it cool, man.
Speaker: Play it cool.
Speaker: And the Indianapolis speech comes up and we're watching and I'm just kind of.
Speaker: Doing a quick glance over.
Speaker: She's.
Speaker: Oh, yeah, exactly.
Speaker: She's she's leaned forward.
Speaker: And she's got this very concentrated look on her face and she's just like, oh, fuck, yes, she is in rapture with Robert Shaw's performance.
Speaker: And I'm just like, I'm just like, I'm just off.
Speaker: This is fucking great.
Speaker: This is great.
Speaker: And so it ends and and I just look at her and I go pretty fucking amazing, right?
Speaker: Like that was pretty great.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And she looks at me and she goes, I couldn't understand a word he said.
Speaker: Oh, no.
Speaker: She literally couldn't understand a fucking word he said.
Speaker: I'm sitting over here going, oh, she's loving the performance.
Speaker: Oh, no.
Speaker: RIP.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I was like, well.
Speaker: She's like, what is his accent?
Speaker: And I was like, it's New York hillbilly.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: It's really just...
Speaker: not hillbilly technically because we're on the shore, but you know what I mean?
Speaker: It's white trash from New York.
Speaker: So yeah.
Speaker: So anyway, on a related note, quick man is dead.
Speaker: Long live quick man.
Speaker: So we get we got all the robot masters dead.
Speaker: Everyone's dead.
Speaker: Gone.
Speaker: Except for Dr. Wiley, who shows up to threaten
Speaker: threatened dr light it's so great it says uh dr wiley is very much alive just this morning he flew over my laboratory in his flying saucer he hovered there for a while yelling through his bullhorn
Speaker: What did he say?
Speaker: Oh, he was threatening me, said Dr. Light.
Speaker: He said I should call you off the job or else.
Speaker: Back in the good old days when violent nerds actually had to show their faces to threaten you.
Speaker: I don't get the first part of that is, was there a question as to whether he was alive?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Who killed him while I was gone?
Speaker: He's still there, still alive.
Speaker: So unrelated to this whole thing, Dr. Wiley got into a massive car accident.
Speaker: It was touch and go there for a bit.
Speaker: It was touch and go there for a bit.
Speaker: But I can assure you he is still very much alive.
Speaker: He's still alive.
Speaker: What news, everybody?
Speaker: Dr. Wiley's still alive.
Speaker: Yeah, he's he's going to be comatose for the rest of his life.
Speaker: And even if he comes out of it, he won't be able to move anything below his neck.
Speaker: But he's alive, Mega Man.
Speaker: You can kill him.
Speaker: It's still still good.
Speaker: Still good for a mega killing.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: So good.
Speaker: I hope I hope you've got some horribly violent puns baked up.
Speaker: So we get watch out.
Speaker: Here I come.
Speaker: walking calmly to the hospital.
Speaker: As he says, as he repeats, I'm hot.
Speaker: So he's going to infiltrate Dr. Wily's castle.
Speaker: And here's the closest thing they have to any interesting threat level kind of stakes.
Speaker: You find out that Dr. Light cannot communicate with him while he's inside of the castle.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Not that he was doing a ton of communicating.
Speaker: Not a ton.
Speaker: No.
Speaker: There's actually...
Speaker: They make a point at the beginning of every chapter.
Speaker: It's like, Dr. Light's signal cut out, and there's just static.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Which is like his voice faded out after he gave me the very helpful tip of good job, keep going.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And we do get a moment where he gets into the place and he's wandering through the castle and he finds himself alone and he's actually like lonely.
Speaker: He misses the sound of Dr. Light's voice.
Speaker: Which is kind of sweet.
Speaker: That human feeling of loneliness.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He's never had that before.
Speaker: He's a lonely boy who just can't stop murdering.
Speaker: And then he murders the shit out of a dragon.
Speaker: He kills the last dragon.
Speaker: On his way there, he kills the last unicorn.
Speaker: Just for good measure.
Speaker: The last unicorn from the book, The Last Unicorn.
Speaker: Did anyone notice?
Speaker: I'm looking again, and I don't think it's... No, the dragon is one of the... It's a terrific and very memorable boss during one of the levels of Dr. Wily's Castle.
Speaker: But it's very clearly a robot dragon.
Speaker: At no point in this chapter do they mention that it's a robot, do they?
Speaker: He's just fighting a straight up dragon.
Speaker: If you hadn't told me that, I would have never known.
Speaker: It just says it was a dragon, a very big dragon, breathing fire.
Speaker: That's how it was described, verbatim.
Speaker: Yeah, that's exactly how it was described.
Speaker: Breathing fire.
Speaker: It's like, oh, great.
Speaker: Mega Man kills a literal dragon in the novelization of Mega Man 2.
Speaker: And, you know, nothing ever good comes of killing dragons in fiction, I don't believe.
Speaker: Usually dragons are not the thing that you want to go and, like,
Speaker: It's like an ominous portent.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Something else is going to happen immediately after.
Speaker: It's going to be real bad.
Speaker: I do like the, it is fun to go from robots to like fantasy creatures.
Speaker: Like it's Mega Man spans across multiple different genres.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Mega Man contains millions.
Speaker: He's just, he's an endless creature.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Sorry.
Speaker: He contains multitudes.
Speaker: He contains a million dollars.
Speaker: There's always money in the Mega Man stand.
Speaker: Mm hmm.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: When you sell those organs, boy, howdy, howdy.
Speaker: These are organs from a robot man that became human.
Speaker: Now that's they are mega organs.
Speaker: Mega organs.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Mega organs for mega bucks.
Speaker: Let's go.
Speaker: Look at, look at these kidneys and tell me they ain't worth 50.
Speaker: Come on.
Speaker: How did we get there?
Speaker: Sometimes I lose track of the thread of how- Dragon killing.
Speaker: Killing dragons.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Killing dragons.
Speaker: Killed a dragon.
Speaker: Killed a dragon.
Speaker: The next level, the next level, chapter is weird because it's like the wall is attacking him.
Speaker: I don't understand what's supposed to be happening.
Speaker: I had to reread it a few times.
Speaker: Was the Yellow Devil in Mega Man 2?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He was?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I have to assume that's what they're talking about.
Speaker: All right.
Speaker: Because, yeah, he's literally being attacked by the wall, and it's not really clear what's...
Speaker: Yeah, it's very confusing this chapter.
Speaker: Bricks, like bricks are like they describe these bricks coming at him and he's going to blow up the bricks.
Speaker: And this is another terrific example of like not really understanding the source material or what the hell is going on.
Speaker: And it really not matter.
Speaker: It doesn't matter that much.
Speaker: He gets he gets through and he moves on to.
Speaker: Yeah, he grabs an energy pellet and then he yells the word jailbreak and then he's jailbreak.
Speaker: What the fuck was that all about, by the way?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He shouts jailbreak.
Speaker: That's my favorite thing, Lizzie song.
Speaker: What is that all about?
Speaker: Mega Man was closing in on Dr. Wily.
Speaker: And up ahead, he saw the castle's moat.
Speaker: And I don't understand.
Speaker: Now I don't know where we are in the castle because the moat is like the first thing.
Speaker: The moat's the outside, yeah?
Speaker: The whole point of a moat is to keep people out.
Speaker: What has he been going through?
Speaker: And now he's at the moat.
Speaker: Now he's at the moat.
Speaker: Is the moat inside?
Speaker: Is it an inside?
Speaker: Is it actually an indoor moat?
Speaker: It's an indoor moat.
Speaker: It's actually an indoor moat.
Speaker: Some people can afford that.
Speaker: It's actually an indoor lazy river.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: People who got that Protestant money can afford an indoor mode.
Speaker: That's true.
Speaker: My mode is above ground, so it's not really.
Speaker: Oh, well, you know, but some people, what's the difference?
Speaker: No difference.
Speaker: Cost you less.
Speaker: You're just frugal.
Speaker: You just gotta watch out for sharp objects, you know?
Speaker: Above ground mode.
Speaker: That sounds like such a mess.
Speaker: On one hand, on one hand, it's like one of the things that like I can simultaneously totally understand why that's never been a thing like a above ground lazy river.
Speaker: And also I want one so badly at the same time.
Speaker: That's awesome.
Speaker: I mean, you, Phil, when you homestead some property in Georgia, that's, that's the thing.
Speaker: When you.
Speaker: I'm going to, I'm going to get an above ground lazy river, a moat surrounding our farm.
Speaker: Oh, it's going to be good.
Speaker: Oh, okay.
Speaker: We are.
Speaker: We are in the home stretch here.
Speaker: So close.
Speaker: You're so close.
Speaker: But in order to get to Dr. Wiley, first thing we got to do is get past guts.
Speaker: Dozer guts.
Speaker: Dozer guts.
Speaker: Dozer was big.
Speaker: Guts Dozer was mean and Guts Dozer was coming straight for Mega Man.
Speaker: He felt very tiny all of a sudden, but he knew he must destroy Guts Dozer.
Speaker: I don't know if I would say he felt tiny all of a sudden.
Speaker: I feel like we've been reading about people telling him that he's tiny.
Speaker: I think it's on his mind a lot.
Speaker: He's thinking about it constantly.
Speaker: He's lying to himself if it's all of a sudden.
Speaker: He's constantly, he's sitting there going, do you think Guts Dozer notices that I'm 4'11"?
Speaker: He's like, you know what?
Speaker: He's going to.
Speaker: I've got to kill him because if I don't, he'll go back to his friends and laugh at me.
Speaker: We're all going to laugh at you.
Speaker: So he literally throws everything at him.
Speaker: Just like all of his shit he throws at him.
Speaker: Finally gets the crash bomber and blows him sky high.
Speaker: He opened his eyes.
Speaker: Guts Dozer was gone.
Speaker: He drops a nuke on him.
Speaker: Which is not how you kill him in the game.
Speaker: But we're going to blow right past that.
Speaker: You throw Quick Man's boomerangs into there's a little weak spot on his forehead.
Speaker: That's, that's, that's the way you deal with guts dozer.
Speaker: That's it.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Pro tips.
Speaker: The book didn't tell me that.
Speaker: This is the actual pro tips.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: That's two aging geeks tell you about Mega Man, uh, from when they played it as children in the, uh, late 1980s.
Speaker: This is, this is a tips guide 30 years in the making.
Speaker: Oh, God, it really is.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: So we've got to wrap this up while I stave off killing myself.
Speaker: So he makes his way through it.
Speaker: We get a we get a stupid and short.
Speaker: This is so dumb.
Speaker: So
Speaker: You get another typo here.
Speaker: We got weird.
Speaker: If only Dr. Light could talk to me, said Mega Man out loud.
Speaker: Uh huh.
Speaker: Space.
Speaker: But I know he's watching.
Speaker: At least he knows I'm still.
Speaker: Oh, yeah, because Dr. Light said I'm I'm I can't communicate with you, but I'm always watching.
Speaker: So is Dr. Light?
Speaker: He's God.
Speaker: This is that's what this is.
Speaker: It's a monotheism.
Speaker: Well, he did create man.
Speaker: Did he not?
Speaker: He did.
Speaker: He was trying to clone him, but instead he created.
Speaker: This is the true Frankenstein tale.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: But instead, Frankenstein and the monster Mega Man get along famously, and they like it when he kills people.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: They high five.
Speaker: They're super chill about that.
Speaker: I don't think they ever say it happens, but you can imagine there's a lot of high five and going on.
Speaker: Can't stop those two from high-fiving.
Speaker: I think this chapter's so short, it's like a page and a half.
Speaker: The only real thing of note, he goes and he fights little clones.
Speaker: Does this happen in the game?
Speaker: You fight little mini boss fights of the same robot.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You have, it's a call of boss rush.
Speaker: I think it's cool.
Speaker: You have to kill all the bosses.
Speaker: It's very cool.
Speaker: I'm glad that they just sort of made it really short sentences and not just talk about it again.
Speaker: Very unlike this book to skip over the action.
Speaker: But it is.
Speaker: It's a little it's a weird choice.
Speaker: It's strange.
Speaker: But my my favorite my favorite line they try to use like onomatopoeia or not onomatopoeia.
Speaker: They try to use alliteration for like everything like he blew up bubble man mowed down metal man.
Speaker: The most important thing of note and we're still feeling, you know, repercussions and waves of this today is that he did cancel Crash Man.
Speaker: And I think that really he did set a precedent for.
Speaker: And that is why Crash Man's career has never recovered.
Speaker: Never recovered.
Speaker: Never recovered.
Speaker: That is the cruelest of the fates that he bestows upon these these robot masters.
Speaker: Instead of fighting Crash Man, he just looks him in the eye and he opens up Twitter and says, I have receipts.
Speaker: He's got this receipt.
Speaker: And then and then as if, you know, as if.
Speaker: Just just a cruel, ironic fate at the end of that is he terminates Twitter, man.
Speaker: But I think that was that was for the betterment of all humanity, I feel.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Ultimately, ultimately, we all did better.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Positive.
Speaker: Yeah, for sure.
Speaker: It's a net positive.
Speaker: It's a net positive.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And that brings us to Chapter 20.
Speaker: It was pitch black.
Speaker: You had to do it.
Speaker: Mega Man couldn't see his hand in front of his face.
Speaker: Where was Dr. Willie?
Speaker: I mean, Wiley.
Speaker: Yeah, right.
Speaker: And then it's it's.
Speaker: I'm not sure it's this, this chapter is kind of written because how did, okay.
Speaker: So he jumps into the hatch, it's pitch black and now he's just in a, and now it's just stars everywhere.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And then Wiley runs away and he chases after him.
Speaker: And then there's an alien and it's probably not an alien.
Speaker: Green alien.
Speaker: Hmm.
Speaker: A very mysterious situation.
Speaker: Scott gave, gave me the Tristan.
Speaker: Hmm.
Speaker: On, on, on,
Speaker: I once again forgot the thing that I do for like a living.
Speaker: Oh my God.
Speaker: It's amazing.
Speaker: No, no.
Speaker: It's like, you know what?
Speaker: You had an opportunity and you took it and I appreciate it.
Speaker: You're right.
Speaker: It's probably not aliens.
Speaker: You finally, you know...
Speaker: You're not at your place now.
Speaker: You get to act out.
Speaker: You get to try something.
Speaker: Try them as a new pants.
Speaker: It did not even register in my brain that you were making a reference to a thing that I do.
Speaker: I was like, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: It's probably not an alien.
Speaker: You're right.
Speaker: It's probably not.
Speaker: i bet it's i bet it's dr wiley dressed up so yeah anyway to suggest any and to suggest otherwise is like based really in western racism so no that's that's a good you made a good joke kevin and i it flew right by right over my my tiny little head it just went right over it
Speaker: The nicest guy on the internet, Scott.
Speaker: No, Kevin, it was a good joke.
Speaker: It was really good.
Speaker: Keep your chin up, buddy.
Speaker: It's a good joke.
Speaker: It wasn't you, it was me.
Speaker: Don't listen to him, Kevin.
Speaker: It was terrible.
Speaker: That's the semi-antagonist relationship that I...
Speaker: It's what's kept us friends for 10 years.
Speaker: We met in a, in a comedy writing workshop in which we had to tell each other our jokes were terrible, basically.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I think that's only improved your material.
Speaker: I imagine it's, it's a situation where you either like get to be friends forever or you burn the entire city you live in.
Speaker: There's only four of us in the class.
Speaker: I forget the other kid's name.
Speaker: I mean, it was Lee.
Speaker: One kid was really young, but it was for, for comedy script writing television, comedy script writing.
Speaker: And it was just like, we would each bring a script in a pilot script and
Speaker: And we would read it out loud and it was just us taking turns saying like, no, this joke doesn't work.
Speaker: You should probably do a different joke.
Speaker: Not going to play, man.
Speaker: It's not going to play.
Speaker: It's not going to play in the Midwest.
Speaker: We workshopped in the same manner that Mega Man really should have considered.
Speaker: Could use a second.
Speaker: Dr. Light, you could have bounced that.
Speaker: Dr. Light, before I go in there and kill Airman, I was wondering if I could bounce a few things off the material I've been working on.
Speaker: Been working on.
Speaker: I'd love to.
Speaker: If I said that I rocked him like a hurricane, do you think people would get
Speaker: megaman's working on his tight five for the comedy store yeah oh yeah exactly so yeah megaman defeats a weird green alien thing yes uh which was a mirage as he puts it which which is frankly real weird i remember it just being like what's i just remember it being like a robot of that dr wiley used but yeah i guess it's a sure yeah sure
Speaker: Dr. Wily created a mirage to scare Mega Man, but Mega Man had destroyed it with bubble lead.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It sounds like an advertisement for bubble.
Speaker: It sure does.
Speaker: Bubble lead.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Take care of all your alien mirages game.
Speaker: And then it ends with a game hint to get to heat man.
Speaker: Use the sea weapon to cut through the wall.
Speaker: I think we all know what the sea weapon is.
Speaker: Don't we boys?
Speaker: Huh?
Speaker: Huh?
Speaker: My fiance's gonna leave me.
Speaker: I was like cycling through C words in my head to be like, what?
Speaker: I was like, what's the funniest, not what you're trying to say, but what's the funniest other C word I could come up with?
Speaker: I had nothing.
Speaker: My brain dumped every word that starts with C out of existence, out of my memory.
Speaker: And I couldn't think of anything.
Speaker: For future reference, Scott, the word is calico.
Speaker: Calico.
Speaker: That's a great one.
Speaker: Isn't that is that technically what what your cat one of your cats is, is that's Ripley.
Speaker: Ripley is a is a dilute calico.
Speaker: There you go.
Speaker: A very fat dilute.
Speaker: Chapter 21.
Speaker: We get a little denouement.
Speaker: A little falling action here.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Dr. Wily's defeated.
Speaker: The end.
Speaker: The end.
Speaker: What happens next?
Speaker: What happens next?
Speaker: Mega Man is thanked profusely.
Speaker: by Dr. Light.
Speaker: And Dr. Light offers to turn him back into a robot, which I imagine would only be a real gory, like, prolonged and painful operation.
Speaker: The way things are going, he'd offer to turn them into a robot and then clone them instead.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It finally works.
Speaker: That's exactly what would happen.
Speaker: He'd just end up with two.
Speaker: He'd be like, let me put you into this robo transometer with turning back into robot capabilities.
Speaker: And then it would be the cloning one.
Speaker: Oh man, I mislabeled those.
Speaker: And then like a little fly goes into it and out comes Jeff Goldblum.
Speaker: That's right.
Speaker: That's how we get him.
Speaker: That's how we get.
Speaker: It just starts.
Speaker: Brindle fly.
Speaker: Brindle Mega Man.
Speaker: And that's and then and here's here's another is our literal final moment.
Speaker: of clearly this was just the writer watching someone beat this game.
Speaker: The final moment that she's describing of him, he's going back to his like farm in the mountain valley or whatever.
Speaker: And he's and it has him describing like,
Speaker: Thinking about how beautiful it looks in the winter when the snow falls and in the fall when the leaves turn golden and red and summer and green.
Speaker: And that is literally the ending credits of the game is Mega Man walking.
Speaker: And the trees are changing from winter to fall.
Speaker: Like that's literally the ending of the game.
Speaker: And as Kevin pointed out before, the music kicks ass.
Speaker: It's a really lovely ending theme.
Speaker: And Mega Man's human forever now.
Speaker: He's human forever now.
Speaker: It's canon.
Speaker: To this book.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Until Mega Man 3.
Speaker: Until Mega Man 3.
Speaker: And then, dear reader, I hope you like reading Mega Man 2.
Speaker: Here's, read some Robert Heinlein or Isaac Asimov.
Speaker: Here's the whole list.
Speaker: Here's the whole list.
Speaker: The Forgotten Door by Alexander Key.
Speaker: Have Spacesuit Will Travel by Robert Heinlein.
Speaker: How to Eat Fried Worms by Thomas Rockwell.
Speaker: I Robot by Isaac Asimov.
Speaker: My Robot Buddy by Alfred Sloat.
Speaker: And The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster.
Speaker: You can find these books at your local library or bookstore.
Speaker: Ask your teacher or librarian for other books you might enjoy.
Speaker: Best wishes, FX9.
Speaker: Because that's legally the way you have to say that.
Speaker: You have to do it that way.
Speaker: They will get you.
Speaker: And then, oops, you don't have a library.
Speaker: Their funding has been cut.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And then the very last thing is it does end with a Nintendo Game Boy compact video game system giveaway.
Speaker: So you could get a Game Boy.
Speaker: Do you think?
Speaker: I think we have a shot.
Speaker: I think we have a shot.
Speaker: There's 10 grand prize winners.
Speaker: I bet they still have at least three or four of them.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Entries must be postmarked by November 5th, 1990.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: We can do that.
Speaker: It's only...
Speaker: Fill in the coupon below or write the information on a three by five piece of paper and mail to worlds of power giveaway.
Speaker: It's only 32 years ago.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: The good news is if we don't get the first place, there are at least there are 25 second prize winners.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Well, yeah, there are 10 grand prize winners.
Speaker: There are three of us.
Speaker: I feel like one of us is a good shot.
Speaker: The odds are in our favor.
Speaker: And a cool video game carrying case, which I'm going to be honest with you guys.
Speaker: Sounds a little vague.
Speaker: I think it sounds better.
Speaker: I think it sounds better.
Speaker: What could it be?
Speaker: One of those cases that you could put all your Nintendo cartridges in.
Speaker: I like it.
Speaker: Made it out of masking tape and jeans.
Speaker: I like it.
Speaker: I think you just have to break into the post office and get one of those little stampy things that postmarks it and you just postmark it.
Speaker: for before November 5th, 1990.
Speaker: And you're set.
Speaker: Do it yourself.
Speaker: Legally.
Speaker: Yeah, you're all set.
Speaker: They have to at least consider it.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Aside from breaking into a government building, you're legally in the clear, right?
Speaker: You're fine.
Speaker: You're fine.
Speaker: And if you're not justified by law, you're justified in the eyes of God.
Speaker: Let's face facts.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: That's a moral right thing to do.
Speaker: In the eyes of Dr. Light, you're fine.
Speaker: In the eyes of Dr. Light.
Speaker: Yeah, well, yeah, Dr. Light.
Speaker: Now, the most important question for this, is Mega Man a cop?
Speaker: Well, he's human, so that can't be.
Speaker: I'm gonna get shot.
Speaker: Now, I do a little thing.
Speaker: You guys are reading the PDFs.
Speaker: I don't know if the back cover is on your screen.
Speaker: Oh, it sure is.
Speaker: Oh, you know it is.
Speaker: This book, can I tell you?
Speaker: I love this.
Speaker: You can do your thing.
Speaker: No, I bet you're going to point out what I'm going to point out.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: Because the back cover also of this specific PDF that we have also tells me what price this book was sold for.
Speaker: Which is $4.20.
Speaker: $4.20, baby.
Speaker: $4.20.
Speaker: Air horns.
Speaker: Yeah, throw that in in post.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Mine was $2.95.
Speaker: Oh, you got a much better deal.
Speaker: I'm upset about that.
Speaker: No, on the back, they're telling the story.
Speaker: You got the you got the back summary thing and we get a we get an early.
Speaker: Oh, how did you make that?
Speaker: That's that's all I got.
Speaker: And on the on the built in sound effects.
Speaker: Amazing.
Speaker: We really I think that's really the only thing that's missing from this show is a sound.
Speaker: I mean, there is a soundboard.
Speaker: I it just like.
Speaker: That's good.
Speaker: That's good.
Speaker: I need that in my daily life, really.
Speaker: So here's another reference that might age the fuck out of me.
Speaker: But we get some early Gilligan's Island vibes here.
Speaker: where I'll just read this.
Speaker: I'll just read the summary on the back.
Speaker: Only our robot superhero can save the universe from evil.
Speaker: Dr. Wily and his gang.
Speaker: They're the toughest, baddest robots ever made.
Speaker: Can Mega Man defeat Flash Man, Crash Man, Bubble Man and the rest?
Speaker: I don't know if you guys knew the Gilligan's Island theme song, you know, did not used to end with the movie star, the professor and Marianne.
Speaker: It used to end and the rest.
Speaker: There's not that many characters.
Speaker: And the Professor and Marianne were like, what the fuck?
Speaker: Yeah, there's not that many characters in the show.
Speaker: It's like leaving two characters off.
Speaker: They literally left two characters off.
Speaker: And the ending they came up with was way better.
Speaker: So I couldn't help but read this.
Speaker: It was like Flashman, Crashman, Boba Man, and the rest.
Speaker: And they didn't even go with like the best ones.
Speaker: They get Metal Man.
Speaker: Metal Man is referenced almost every page.
Speaker: Metal Man, it's like Metal Man did all the work himself.
Speaker: Let's be honest.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Where would Metal Man crawl?
Speaker: Exactly.
Speaker: And I agree with you because I was reading this and I was like, you're trying to sell this as like a really cool, interesting adventure story.
Speaker: And one of the villains you're going with is Bubble Man.
Speaker: Like you're going to sell it on Bubble Man.
Speaker: Bubbles are, for the target audience of this book, I'd say bubbles are probably kind of lame.
Speaker: Probably.
Speaker: You might get a little crossover, but not much.
Speaker: Not enough.
Speaker: Personally, I like bubbles.
Speaker: Did they take Mega Man's and go away from them?
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: Who doesn't like bubbles?
Speaker: Who among us?
Speaker: Who among us?
Speaker: Who does not like bubbles?
Speaker: Cast the first.
Speaker: I mean, come on.
Speaker: Also, bubble.
Speaker: Bubble.
Speaker: Oh, they sure did.
Speaker: Okay, here you go.
Speaker: Censorship at work, ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker: The cover of Worlds of Power, Mega Man 2, they have removed the gun.
Speaker: Oh my God, I just noticed that.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He's just kind of showing them his fist, whereas in the actual cover of Mega Man 2, the original Capcom game, he's firing a gun at Quick Man and missing.
Speaker: He missed.
Speaker: He's just pointing a fist at Quick Man.
Speaker: He's not that mega.
Speaker: He's not that mega.
Speaker: Final thoughts on Mega Man 2.
Speaker: Boy, we did cover to cover on this book, huh?
Speaker: We sure did.
Speaker: We did.
Speaker: Yes, sir.
Speaker: I liked it.
Speaker: I thought it was fun.
Speaker: Is it the best book of all time?
Speaker: Was it a New York Times bestseller?
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: Probably...
Speaker: Probably.
Speaker: I didn't do the research.
Speaker: I was not tasked with anything other than reading this book.
Speaker: But I thought it was a very fun read.
Speaker: If I was the target audience for this book, if I was, you know, a couple years younger, I would.
Speaker: just a couple of years younger.
Speaker: I'm still, I'm still, I'm still very youthful.
Speaker: 27.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: If I was the target audience at 27 years old, I would love this book.
Speaker: I think it's great.
Speaker: It's very, it's, it's super quick.
Speaker: I think that's the thing that I like about it.
Speaker: It is, it is just action from, from beginning to end.
Speaker: Uh, it's very fun.
Speaker: Uh, there's, it leaves me, it leaves me wanting more.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: Like it makes me think I wish I wish there was a longer version of this story that dove into the depths of of Mega Man.
Speaker: That this.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: This is like the abridged version.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I have to believe that that's a fan.
Speaker: Oh, I got to be like it's someone.
Speaker: I mean, I'll tell you what, if nothing else, this book makes me want to play the video game.
Speaker: There you go.
Speaker: If that's its job, then like it sold me on it.
Speaker: I want to play it.
Speaker: And the Mega Man 2 is kind of by most people I know, widely accepted, at least in the early 8 bit generation of Mega Man games.
Speaker: Two is generally lauded as like the best.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: it followed closely and sometimes switched up with three, which was always my favorite too.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: But yeah, I mean, honestly, you know, if you get a, you know, hell on a switch or something like that, you can get the Mega Man collection.
Speaker: It goes on sale all the damn time for like 10 bucks.
Speaker: I mean, I want to now.
Speaker: This was fun.
Speaker: This was my very first experience really with at least the story of Mega Man.
Speaker: Like I said, I'd heard the music before and it's awesome.
Speaker: But story-wise, this is like my first little toe dipping into it.
Speaker: When you play the game, you listen to the music when you're playing the game.
Speaker: That's cool.
Speaker: It's kind of one of the best.
Speaker: Do I have to download anything else or is it just already in there?
Speaker: It's already in there.
Speaker: That's a great thing.
Speaker: Oh, my gosh.
Speaker: That's amazing.
Speaker: It's so cool.
Speaker: Technology.
Speaker: It is.
Speaker: We live in a- You buy a Mega Man 2 album and you get a game with it.
Speaker: That's a good deal.
Speaker: I honestly think that that's how we need to think of it.
Speaker: You buy the Mega Man soundtrack and it comes with a game.
Speaker: It's great stuff.
Speaker: What did you two think of this book?
Speaker: Did you like it?
Speaker: Does it live up to the standards of books that you normally review on the show?
Speaker: Absolutely not.
Speaker: It's probably, it's, it's, well, it might be better than Dead Space.
Speaker: Maybe, yeah, a little better.
Speaker: Because at least this one was meant to sound like it was meant for children.
Speaker: Yes, that's true.
Speaker: That is true.
Speaker: Dead Space just seemed like it was just straight up incompetence.
Speaker: Oh, poor Dead Space.
Speaker: Yeah, no, it was like, it was fun.
Speaker: There was a few laugh out loud moments for me.
Speaker: And you know what?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: That's that's all I can really ask for.
Speaker: And in an afternoon of of reading, you know, in between meetings is just like this.
Speaker: Yeah, it sent me sent me to the giggles a few times as I reread a few.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I agree.
Speaker: I think I think what it lacks in competence as a book is it makes up for in the sense that, like, yeah, it's this sounds like this sounds like a read, but it's like it's like it's short.
Speaker: um but like but like like in a good way like like you can you can read it i literally think it took me all told like 45 minutes or an hour it's it's quick man yeah yeah yeah like like the character it made me a nostalgic
Speaker: It made me nostalgic for being, you know, because I agree with you, Scott.
Speaker: I think if I had read this as a kid, I probably would have loved it.
Speaker: And, you know, because I loved Mega Man, so I would have I would have devoured it.
Speaker: But so it gives you and then you've got the neat ads in the book and stuff like actually buying the damn thing was.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: We don't have any ads other than the thing at the very end.
Speaker: Yeah, it's it's just neat.
Speaker: It's just neat.
Speaker: neat thing and now knowing that it's totally unauthorized.
Speaker: That's the extra layer on the cake, you know?
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: That's like in Bake Off when they're like, I'm adding cardamom to this recipe and I'm like, I don't know what flavor you're going for with... I don't know what the fuck you're doing here, but you just told me, asked me if I won a splinter, so I'm intrigued.
Speaker: Do you think Nintendo was okay with it because it ends with a giveaway where they definitely had to buy at least 10 Game Boys?
Speaker: It had to buy a lot.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: At least the 10 Game Boys.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I think I, to be completely honest, you know, there's, there's, there was a, there was a lot of questioning, for example, of like, uh,
Speaker: Nintendo in that age.
Speaker: That was from a joke that was made about six or seven minutes ago.
Speaker: It's on a delay.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I was queuing up that for like in case somebody made a joke later and then it just auto-played.
Speaker: And it just went.
Speaker: Oh, there were a lot of like religious games and like that Nintendo didn't didn't like.
Speaker: They didn't you know, they didn't want.
Speaker: I did a whole video on my YouTube channel about, you know, Christian video games and Nintendo.
Speaker: A lot of that starts with wisdom tree and all that stuff, which were games that beat out the lockout system in Nintendo.
Speaker: which was not illegal, but Nintendo was pretty pissed about.
Speaker: And and there were a lot of things that Nintendo could have done to like sue Wisdom Tree and obliterate them, basically.
Speaker: But it would have been a lot of work and it probably wouldn't have.
Speaker: It wouldn't have looked good on their ends because they want to look like a family entertainment kind of thing.
Speaker: And I bet this falls under that umbrella on a certain level.
Speaker: They're just like, ugh, like it's their kids books.
Speaker: Do we really want to be the people who stomped on these people who are making kids books?
Speaker: Yeah, it's kids, but it's scholastic, you know, like, yeah.
Speaker: Now, if it had been an American company, the story would have been very, 100%.
Speaker: Yeah, but the Japanese were like, whatever.
Speaker: So Scott, do you have anything you want to plug?
Speaker: apparently not according to my memory.
Speaker: We know that you're not on any shows, Scott.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Hey, if you podcast listener like podcasts, I have one called it's probably not aliens.
Speaker: It's a podcast all about debunking ancient aliens claims like the history channel show ancient aliens and talking about the real world history behind the places and the people and the objects that's
Speaker: that create these conspiracies, but the real life history is so much cooler.
Speaker: So I do that with my buddy Tristan from Step Back.
Speaker: He has a YouTube channel.
Speaker: I also have a YouTube channel.
Speaker: It's called NerdSync if you're into that sort of thing.
Speaker: But that's basically everything I think for me.
Speaker: Cool.
Speaker: Cool.
Speaker: And yes.
Speaker: And Phil, you're still doing your videos every week.
Speaker: I am.
Speaker: I do game reviews on YouTube at El Conquista Dork, which is Spanish for the Conquista Dork.
Speaker: um you can uh find uh this up you could have used the rim shot you know what though where you're yeah see we had it it was ready it would have been ready um hold on a lot let's take that back let's roll that back a little bit yeah let's try that again let's let's take that again yep that's it's a it's a spanish for the conquistador
Speaker: That's pretty well.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Love it.
Speaker: We'll fix them.
Speaker: Post.
Speaker: I've got I don't know what the actual review will be coming out.
Speaker: But yeah, Friday, Friday mornings, we got reviews.
Speaker: We're wrapping up one that's coming out as of this recording.
Speaker: I've got one coming out for lawn mowing simulator, which tells you the kind of exciting games that I fill my life with.
Speaker: Just just real dad games.
Speaker: That's what it's what has become for me now.
Speaker: I just play dad games now.
Speaker: Dad games and dead spaces.
Speaker: Well, thanks everybody for listening.
Speaker: If you want to help the show out, please share on Twitter or your social media network of choice.
Speaker: Go ahead.
Speaker: Scroll to the bottom of the Apple page.
Speaker: Playback and rate us five stars.
Speaker: It's a five stars, not four stars.
Speaker: Don't do four stars.
Speaker: That was a mistake by me.
Speaker: You guys rolled with that one for a while.
Speaker: Five stars only.
Speaker: Five stars only, please.
Speaker: And tell your friends, tell your family, tell your enemies, tell the hummingbird that's outside your window about us.
Speaker: It really helps to spread the word.
Speaker: It really helps us...
Speaker: get our numbers up and to the right on the chart.
Speaker: And I really feel satisfaction when they go up to the right.
Speaker: As opposed to back to the left.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So we will not be JFK-ing.
Speaker: We will be going up and to the right.
Speaker: And we're going to live forever.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And he looked around.
Speaker: There was a giant W right above him.
Speaker: That's the thing that I screencapped.
Speaker: So.
Speaker: Good night, everybody.
