Transcript
Speaker: Welcome to the Especially for Athletes podcast, where we explore essential principles that empower athletes to learn life's most valuable lessons through sports.
Speaker: Hi, everybody. Welcome to the Especially for Athletes podcast. I'm Dustin Smith. I'm here with my guest host today, Justin Miller. Shad's not available, so Justin was, and we brought Justin on. Justin, thanks for helping me out today.
Speaker: Of course. Good to be here. And our guest today, ah Justin, I'll let you maybe introduce Kendall McGuire. Tell us about Kendall and then we'll start firing away questions at Kendall.
Speaker: Yeah, Kendall is a gymnast down at Southern Utah University in Cedar City. She going into her senior year. that correct? That is. Senior. She's been there all four years, has won some different conference championships.
Speaker: ah Southern Utah has been in the the playoffs or the the bracket for the national championship every year she's been there and they're consistently in the top 25 in the national rankings and kendall's doing sports marketing and media um she's doing communications in that area and also helps out as a sideline reporter for the suu football team and she's done that for a few years We're glad to have Kendall on today and get to know her a little bit. She is from Florida, so not a Utah native. We get to ask her some fun questions about growing up in Florida and hear some stuff about that. So welcome to the podcast, Kendall. Thank you. I'm excited to be here.
Speaker: And Kendall, you also are a sideline reporter. So you do it at the games down there at Southern Utah. Is that all the sports or just football? You do basketball too? I am going to hopefully do some basketball this year. as of right now, I've only done sideline for football. I did get to hop on as a color analyst for a softball game last year, though. So that was kind of neat.
Speaker: Oh, that's cool. That's fun. Yeah. So let me ask you a question cause I've always wondered this. So when I was coaching, i would have reporters sometimes come up to me ah ah after the game, you know, usually, but that when I was playing in a, up in a big, turn a big championship game, a state championship game. Yes.
Speaker: um I had a reporter come up to me at halftime and want to talk. Do they talk to you about how to handle coaches at halftime? Because sometimes we're not the happiest when we're running off the field at halftime. What's their what's their sort of do's and don'ts when talking to a coach at halftime or after a loss?
Speaker: That's another one. Yeah, I feel like Spencer, he's our play-by-play guy. He's incredible. um I don't talk to Fitz if our team loses. we just leave him be. But he is a great interview. so our rule of thumb is just be respectful always, um as anyone would. but I've grown up with a huge like variation of coaches, so I have a pretty good feel for...
Speaker: Kind of like telling how they're going to react. So Spencer kind of just lets me run. um Grab him at halftime, be as like respectful as possible. And honestly, you ask Fitz one question and he'll just go. So we just kind of let him talk and then wrap it up. And he usually gives you something great every time. So...
Speaker: I think at halftime, the reporters are pretty good because they typically, at least my experience, when they talked to me, we were winning. So I was kind of a little excited to talk because I was like, oh, cool. We're, you know, we're playing well. And, but,
Speaker: I'm also got all these things I'm not happy with that I want to get in the locker room and start chewing some butt about, you know, get on some guys and we got to fix this. So you want to be in and in, in the interview they did with me, she asked me a real easy question. Yeah. And I didn't need to, but I couldn't help myself by saying, we were winning, right? I couldn't help myself by saying,
Speaker: Yeah, but we're still not doing well. We're not finishing blocks. We're not staying on guys. We're not playing tough enough. We've got to do better. Like we got, and I just went into all the, and I was, I caught myself like, all right, stop.
Speaker: It's the athlete in you. color Everything's great. Thank you. We're trying hard. We hope we play good in the second half and then get in and yeah tell this to your team. But I was so worked up, you know? Anyway, so yeah. So sometimes when you see coaches on night, you look in their eyes and you'll be able to tell real quick if they want to talk or not.
Speaker: Yep. That's whenever, you know, you're like, oh, this has to be a quick, easy one. Or you're like, oh, he's going to talk in mood. I'll let him go. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You'll, you'll have some fun stories with that. There's, there's blooper reels all over YouTube of halftime and post-game talks with coaches and reporters that, that didn't go well for, for the reporter or for the coach, for one or the other, but. Oh yeah.
Speaker: I had a funny one last year. yeah It was after a win and i like asked him a question. i don't know what I asked him. He was like, Kendall, there's no such thing as like an ugly wife and ugly baby or and like, but that was almost an ugly winner. It was like something crazy like that.
Speaker: Like he just, he has the funniest responses to anything. Like you ask him one question and he'll just like answer on his own, but it's always hilarious. Oh wow. That's good. That's a good one. I might have to remember that when someone says coach, that was kind of a,
Speaker: Ugly win, but are you happy? yeah Yeah. Talking about there's no such thing as an ugly baby. We won the game. That's all that matters. Yeah. We'll give you good content for sure. Oh yeah. talked on those and much Is that, yeah.
Speaker: yeah Is that something that you've always wanted to do growing up kind of be sideline or what's, what's the beginning of that? And then where do you want to get to? So I always wanted to be a vet.
Speaker: I love animals. I'm a huge dog person. So I remember even when I was filling out my like recruiting questionnaires to go to college, I was putting down like pre-vet. um And then i got a dog and she threw up once and I was done.
Speaker: I wanted no part in being a vet. Yeah. And so I was sitting there thinking, I was like, okay, what do I want to do with my life? And I'm sitting there and I have always been the kid. I'm the youngest sibling, only girl.
Speaker: um But for some reason, i magnet to my dad in the TV, sports, everything. He got a good handle on me at a young age, I guess. I've been a sports nerd my whole life and I'm a yapper.
Speaker: So I was like, wait, people literally, their job is talking about sports. I was like, I need to do that. So I met with our sports guy on my official visit here, actually. And whenever I got out here, Scott put in a word for me with our play-by-play guy, because we actually have a sideline reporter. And so they were like, yeah, let's do it. So our head coach was able to connect with someone here and he got me a role and I've just loved it ever since. And I either want to work in the NFL or the and NHL. Those are my two sports I know the most about and like to watch the most. So something in hockey or football.
Speaker: Wow. That's cool. yeah That'll be fun to watch and see yeah see you get there. Kendall, I want to dive into a couple questions for you here and and and talk to us coming as an athlete and also, you know, just I guess is with what you want to do as a profession. Maybe there's an angle there, but for sure as an athlete. So you're in gymnastics, which isn't a sport that in comparison to other sports.
Speaker: is super popular. I mean, meaning kids, you don't see a lot of girls or boys doing gymnastics once they get in high school, you know? So, um, and for sure in college, um, the, the, the girls and the boys who are doing gymnastics in college are just crazy athletic and crazy good. Um,
Speaker: So having had some cousins that did gymnastics, we we had a ah world champion Tumblr on this podcast several months ago, who I know very well. um So I understand a little bit about the work you guys do, but what I don't quite understand is your bodies, you have to kind of talk yourself into doing things that there's got to be, at least to me, there's got to be a fear of not knowing if you're gonna land this or you're how you're gonna come out of this turn or how, like, and and I don't know if it's my fear of just being in the air and being twisted and all this and landing on my head, but like, how do you, when you first started getting into this and really started doing things, um how did you talk yourself into doing this stuff knowing that you could come down funny and really hurt yourself?
Speaker: Yeah. um I started when I was two. So I got thrown in really young. So I built a lot of like early awareness that i didn't know about even at the time that helps me now. I think starting young, you learn a lot about like your spatial awareness in the air. And clearly, I still to this day, I was talking to my teammate Naya about this earlier today. I have better awareness going backwards. I hate going forwards. So I grew up though with a coach that if you were not ready, he wouldn't tell you to do it.
Speaker: So that's something that even our coaches here are really good with. If you're not like physically ready to do something, it's not something you're going to be asked to do. So I'm never really concerned about my safety in that sense, because I know you train the basics, you train... the drills. So we have a good repetition and awareness of what we need to do before we try something new. And even if it is new, your coaches aren't going to have you do it if you're not ready. So that's something that helps me a lot. And sometimes it's an old skill and you do fall hard.
Speaker: I've gotten ambulance and structured out of our gym here at Southern Utah before. fell on my head off the bar on something I compete every weekend. So luckily, thank God everything was okay. But like, sometimes it happens. And you got to get back up to your basics a couple times and go again. It's just kind of part of the sport. I think you've got to be a little crazy, to be honest, just slightly. Yeah. but At the end of the day, you do it because you fell in love with it as a little kid. And that kind of keeps you going even whenever something's tough.
Speaker: What about this thing? Cause Simone Biles years ago, and we've talked about her in presentations when we talk about mental health, yeah I've used her as an example and there's several other athletes. um Michael Phelps, right? The best swimmer of all time, Olympian of all time.
Speaker: and Paul George, Kevin Love, Dak Prescott. These are, you know, NBA and NFL guys who have dealt with mental health issues. And and thankfully they've they've been vocal about it the last several years, really the last five or six years, athletes are finally starting to talk about this and it's becoming more normal that if you have a mental health issue that you can get help and it's okay. And it doesn't mean you're, you're sick and soft and weak or something like it used to be, you know, 30 years ago when I was competing, um which is awesome. I'm glad that we're over that.
Speaker: And I say this almost every podcast when we talk about mental health, if you're a coach, listening to this and you're not sensitive to the mental health issues of your players or your assistant coaches or yourself and you're still living in the old way of coaching, you got to change, right? You've you've you've got to change your opinion and the way you're handling that with kids um and others. Because it definitely is a thing that affects everybody. And it doesn't care if you're a good athlete or if you make a lot of money or if you're a man or a woman, it it doesn't care. And it is a thing and it's affecting a lot of athletes more now than ever. ah I think in part because of the attention put on athletes with the internet everywhere and everything being recorded and social media. And um
Speaker: so Simone Biles had, if I remember right, they called it the twisties. Is that right? and So real quick, explain that and then explain when she came out and said, pulled herself out of the Olympics. There's a quote that she gave that she, that I use in those presentations. She said, for the first time in my life, I realized I'm more than just a gymnast, which I've never thought before. She said, the outpouring of love I've received from people has helped me realize I'm more than just a gymnast, which I never thought of before. In other words, she had attached her identity to gymnastics and attached that her purpose in life was to perform,
Speaker: or compete for the entertainment of other people. And that's who she was. I'm a gymnast. I go out, I perform, people clap for me, I get an award, I go back, I train again, like that's what I am. And so her pulling herself out of the Olympics was really hard because that was her duty almost. Her calling was, I got to go out and perform and win a gold for my country. And finally she was like, no, I've got to address my issue.
Speaker: And And when she did, it opened up all sorts of eyes of people like, wait a minute, I don't have to. just fake this and go out and compete anyway and act like everything's okay. I can come out and say, so talk to us a little bit, if you wouldn't mind about what the twisties is. Um, and then if you remember that, I mean, you would have been probably in junior high or something, I guess, or high school when that happened. Um, do you remember that? What effect did that have on you? And then maybe your thoughts on athletes and mental health.
Speaker: Yeah, absolutely. So the twisties is whenever you kind of lose awareness your air awareness, essentially. So what I was just talking about earlier with you kind of develop an innate sense of just where you are in the air off of drills and training and just repetition. Sometimes it just goes and you can't control it. The only thing you can do is go back to basics and just keep building until you just gain your air awareness again. And so she essentially lost hers.
Speaker: And she had a huge decision to make and she chose herself, which is good because in a sport that is so image focused and that takes up your entire life, it is so easy to lose yourself in the, oh, I'm an athlete.
Speaker: And as opposed to thinking, oh, she's just an athlete. She was like, no, I'm a person and my health outside of this matters because at the end of the day, your sport does end. And what are you going to do with yourself after? Are you going to be able to live a healthy life after? And so she made that choice. And I think it was a good one. And I think it opened a lot of people's eyes.
Speaker: um I remember even before she had done that, I remember that. And I had struggled previously with back tumbling. And it's funny because I literally just said, I like to go backwards.
Speaker: If you had asked me that when I was like 10, I was horrified. I had a fall before and I had to go see a sports psychologist and it took me months. But I had gone to one and nobody in my gym really did. It was kind of a weird situation. and so it was like kind of a weird thing for me. And then I saw her do that and it's like, oh, okay, it's normal.
Speaker: Like you're allowed to go get help. And we even just hired a good sports psychologist here at the school finally, which I think is going to be amazing. i think a lot of coaches are starting to tap into that and realize that it's beneficial to your team to have your kids be able to go get help.
Speaker: Because even your best athletes, there's sometimes something that they're struggling with that they might be really good at keeping under the radar. And you don't know. But it's okay, even if you're doing well, to go check in. Like, you just never know. um And so I think it's really important that athletes and coaches are starting to buy into mental health. yeah Yeah. One other question on that, a follow-up, because you said something in that that I hadn't planned on asking, but And I'm not sure where this is going to go. if if If this isn't something you feel comfortable talking about or whatever, don't go deep into it. But I have some personal experiences with it. So you mentioned it's such an image sport.
Speaker: You said that and it immediately made me think of my daughters who are all in high level dance competitions and things. and And all three of them are are are pretty good. um And I had my second daughter, her junior year of high school, suffered seriously with an eating disorder and ended up having to go into a treatment center for about eight months or so, six to eight months, in and out the last two. But first six, she was in there. So was a pretty serious deal.
Speaker: um She couldn't dance you know in high school anymore. And her body, I mean, it was it was was a bad deal. so So since then, occasionally I'll talk to, when I'm talking to young girls, I'll bring that up.
Speaker: yeah It's a little, i don't know if it's awkward coming from me being a man, but I try to talk to them as a dad and just say, look, this is, I'm talking to you now as a dad here, not a speaker or coach or anything, but...
Speaker: So in gymnastics, is that eating disorder or that world a thing? And what do you guys do or what do you have? Any messages? Again, if you don't feel comfortable, don't go this, don't go this deep. But do you have anything that you think you've heard or that you know that might help a girl listening to this or the parents of a girl listening to this? Because my guess is in gymnastics, this also is a topic or ah an issue, a problem, right?
Speaker: Yes, it's a huge thing in gymnastics. And I think it's not talked about enough. And I actually whenever I came to SU first, you have to fill out clearly your like typical like athlete questionnaire so you can get cleared. And mine got flagged.
Speaker: I didn't know I had one. But I definitely did. I was I would eat regular food. But the thought of like sugar, I would like cry couldn't do it. And so I had to go meet with our nutritionist and she was fantastic. We saw the same one. I love her. I talk to her all the time. She is so good at healing the relationship in your brain with food and realizing that it helps you so much.
Speaker: It is literally fuel for your body. um She was really good at coming up with a plan. And I was didn't realize how thin I was whenever I got out here at first. And now Almost four years later, I'm a senior. I put on so much muscle. All my skills are so much easier because of it. And so I just think if you can, she was really good at scientifically breaking it down at first for my brain, just so that I understood, hey, this is going to break down as a carb. Hey, this is this. Just really getting into the basics. And it's okay to start small.
Speaker: Just have this little snack here, have this here. But at the end of the day, i think it's important to know that in a sport that is so image-based, because I mean, we wear virtually nothing to compete.
Speaker: Small little Leo. So you compare, it's really easy to compare yourself. It's really easy to look at yourself in the mirror for too long. It's okay to know that your body is amazing to be able to do gymnastics.
Speaker: Like what you do is crazy. So to just kind of remove the image out of it and fuel your body well enough to be able to do your skills healthily, that's what really matters at the end of the day.
Speaker: I'd so much rather feel strong and capable than look at myself and be like, oh, I'm not skinny enough. It's so much better to be able to be like, oh, I feel, i feel healthy today. I feel powerful. I feel strong. That's what's important. Oh, I can go out with my friends and enjoy this sweet treat.
Speaker: That's what matters at the end of the day. Yeah. Yeah, you're right. And it it is something that a lot of women um and men too, it's it's not just a women thing, but there are more women that struggle with it. And it's not just teenagers and it's not just competitive athletes. um There's people of all, especially now it's become more of a thing. I think now with all of the, uh, all of the pills and shots and things that are out there right now that to take weight off of people, um,
Speaker: You know, I remember when my daughter was going through this, the the one of the doctors talking to me and say, you know, we kind of raise our girls. as We say little things to the girls when they're young that make them think that they're ah little things. For example, like when you tell a woman,
Speaker: that she looks good after she's lost a lot of weight. If you, if you say, Oh, you look great. I haven't seen you forever. You you look great. Right. And you're, and they have, they, they did they, they've, they've lost weight, but it's not that they looked bad before, but the, the, the way that that's interpreted is, well, I must not have looked good before. Cause you never said this to me before when you saw me.
Speaker: And so you kind of, if they're struggling with an eating disorder, you're kind of feeding that when you compliment, wow, you look great, you know, or if you lost weight, you look good. You look healthy, right? All these words are telling somebody I didn't look good. I wasn't healthy before. And, and young girls see this when they're coming up.
Speaker: um You know, I remember the doctor told us something little like, if if a 12-year-old girl sees her aunt not eat the sweet, like you just talked about, let's say there's a you know a piece of cake or something, and she has a couple bites and says, oh, I can't finish this. It'll go straight to my hips, right?
Speaker: Says something like, I don't want to put on any more weight or my butt or make some comment about her body. That the girl who did eat her entire piece of cake Now judges herself as well. I ate my whole piece, so I must be unhealthy, right? I must be.
Speaker: and And so all these little things, you know, play into it. And his his advice to me was just don't ever talk to anybody, anything weight related, anything image related. Just stay away from it and realize that when you when somebody is suffering from that, it's a real thing.
Speaker: disease. it's It's a real thing. They start looking at food as poison and their body starts rejecting the food and their hunger sensors turn off and their brain doesn't want it anymore. And in fact, it rejects it. um He told me it's like taking a handful of dirt out of your your garden and putting it on your plate and then telling, you know telling yourself to eat it without gagging or wanting to get, not touch it. That's they'll get to that point where that's how they look at food.
Speaker: yeah And it's, and, and it it, and then it affects the heart and the brain and all these other things. And it starts with sometimes a comment, in her case, it was a comment made around a bunch of friends and a bunch of people at a junior high hallway.
Speaker: Some kid made a comment about her, and was making fun of some girls in the school. And he particularly took a shot at her. I'm i even going to share what he said, but it was, it was cruel.
Speaker: And that's kind of when it started because, uh, somebody thought that making, you know, trying to be funny at somebody else's expense.
Speaker: And we do a lot of jokes and, you know, thinking we're being funny as it relates to the body and, I think we need to be better at that. So i' sorry to go on a little bit of a tangent on that. We don't talk a lot about it on that here, but, um, having somebody that's been in that world, Kendall, I think that's, that's probably a ah good thing to maybe just touch on. Um, and what you said was perfect about the body and,
Speaker: fueling it and and your body's amazing and you know it it does all these things and god gave you this body and you're perfect the way you are and um uh you know healthy isn't isn't the size of shape of your body that there's a lot of unhealthy skinny people who are gonna you know die unhealthy and skinny you know and uh and so Well, Kendall, and then I know Justin has a question, but I want to ask you a question about our, we have a principle called win the hour, which deals with time management and things.
Speaker: My guess is to be an athlete at your level, you had to learn to manage your day and and you had to have priorities, right? You couldn't. Yeah. So tell me about some of the things maybe that you feel like you sacrificed or had to prioritize training or school or something else over so that you could be in the place you're at right now competing at a top school in the country in gymnastics.
Speaker: I kind of gave up my entire life growing up. I went at school, practice, home. That was everything for me. So even in like high school, um I didn't go out like high school. Everyone's like, oh, party, party. No, I did school and I actually had to do half online too. So I went K through eight at a Catholic school. So I would literally get there at like 645 in the morning and we'd get out at like 245. I'd try and cram in some homework and then I'd go 430 to 830 practice and go home, do any more homework, go to bed, do it all again.
Speaker: So that was my probably like third through eighth grade. I hit high school and I started at like normal hours. So I'd go like nine to like four-ish.
Speaker: And then I ended up wanting to switch gyms because my old club gym was not working for me. um And that change was big because the new gym I went to started training at one.
Speaker: And that's in the middle of school day. So I had to pull out of school and I went all online and then ended up actually working great because that was the COVID year. So kind of a blessing in disguise there. I was already online.
Speaker: But then whenever I went back, um we ended up doing, i would go classes from like nine to one. And then straight from there, i would literally, me and a teammate went to the same high school. We'd go from there to training one to six.
Speaker: And then I'd come home and not only have to do my schoolwork for my actually in school, I'd have to do my online classes too. And so then from probably like six to 10, I'd be doing homework and trying to eat and then go to bed, do it all again.
Speaker: in the summer, we trained Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, the entire straight week, nine to three, and then Saturdays from nine to 12th. So my entire life was school gymnastics and it was an absolute sacrifice. But I knew from a really young age I wanted to do NCAA gymnastics.
Speaker: And so knowing that, I said, OK, I have to determine here what's important to me. I grew up in a family that prioritized grades. So I knew that wasn't the compromise area. um so instead, I chose to make my sport fun.
Speaker: If you're going to give up what other kids consider fun, I don't think necessarily that the partying aspect of life is what is fun. um I chose to make my sport a party. I chose to have fun in the gym because it really isn't that serious. At the end of the day, you're doing a fun sport with your friends that you fell in love with. And that's why you should be doing it because you love to do it.
Speaker: So I would go from school, I'd do my studying and then I'd go to gym and I would have fun with what I was doing in sports. And that was my outlet. oh, I had a bad day. I didn't do well on a test. Okay, I get to go to practice. It wasn't like a task. It wasn't, oh no, I have to go train. Okay, I get to go do this. And I just, and whenever you turn your mind that way, you feel fortunate and grateful to be able to do school, to go to gym. It's just a little flip in your brain. If you can focus on a sense of gratitude in things, as opposed to, oh, I'm giving this up.
Speaker: No, I'm getting to chase my dreams every day and hopefully make it to that next point. I like that. I've never thought of it that way. That's a really good way of changing the way you look at it to, instead of this being a sacrifice that I, it's no, I'm, I get to go do more practice. I get to go play the sport. I love more and be with my friends doing the sport. I love more. And instead of, oh my gosh, I'm giving it up to go the weight room. I'm missing this party or this. Yeah. So my guess is Kendall, you probably didn't spend a lot of time watching TV or, uh, on social media.
Speaker: No, I actually did not care about social media at all. i ka I think I mentioned before I grew up, I'm Catholic. So we do like things for Lent and like my mom's like, oh what do you want to give up? I would give up my phone 40 straight days, no phone. I didn't care. Like I was so unattached to it because I had so much going on in my life.
Speaker: But I actually think it's better that way. The more you can unplug, You stop comparing, you stop scrolling, your brain works a little quicker, I think actually. But I just, yeah, I knew who I wanted to surround myself with. And it was people who wanted to work hard and go after the same things I did. Like those were the people I wanted to be with, the people that had the drive, the willpower, but like they wanted to go do something more with their life. I was like, that's where I wanted to be anyway. So yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, that's great. Oh, that's awesome, Kendall. I think one thing that kind of stood out from what you said was just being like enjoying practice. Like that was something that I think most people struggle with. I certainly struggled with it at times.
Speaker: Um, and I think part of it can be your situation or your coach or your teammates and things like that. But ultimately it really does just come down to you and making it either fun or not fun. yeah And talk me through gymnastics a little bit, like obviously the structure of practice and things like that. Um, are different than other sports, but for football and I mean, growing up playing baseball, basketball, kind of a lot of different real team sports that you're not doing flips and all kinds of crazy stuff. Um,
Speaker: In those sports, you can kind of get away with not necessarily being present all the time. you can You can have your mind slip. And mean, depending on the position you play and and what sport especially, like you can totally go through the motions and practice. And get away with it Nobody even noticed you were just kind of half there today. You were thinking about what you were doing over the weekend or, or what you have planned later on. And in gymnastics, I think it's probably the complete opposite of that, where you have to be present all the time thinking about what you're doing. And, and obviously you don't want to overthink on things, but you need to be in the right frame of mind to be able to do
Speaker: flips and twists and especially for you on the bars, things like that, where if it, if something goes wrong, you're going to get seriously hurt. So you need to be present as that. i mean, talk to me about that a little bit and then how that's carried over when you are doing other stuff, when you're doing homework or in classes, do you feel like that habit is carried over in your life?
Speaker: Absolutely. Yeah. So Scotty is amazing about enforcing this the second you get here. We come to SU and he says, the second you step in the gym, leave everything at the door. Leave everything else at the door and just be here for the three hours that you train. And the other thing he's really great about, this is something that my roommate Naya actually, we have word of the day. it goes down the line. Every kid on the team has to say something at the start of practice. It's the best one I think we've ever had as a team. Underthink it. And that's now our team motto.
Speaker: So you come in and you're so present. You're here to have fun. You're here to do a job, but you're also underthinking everything. So you're just trusting your training. You're having fun with your team, but you're here.
Speaker: So you walk into the gym. It's still an individual sport because as you said, everything that you do matters. You have to be there. You are your own athlete. You're doing your routine, but it's not only your routine anymore. It counts for the team. So it's the team's routine.
Speaker: You're doing it, but it matters for your your teammates next to you. You're doing your routine for the girl standing next to you on your left and your right. but they can't do it for you. So like you said, you can't just kind of go through the motions and, oh, my teammate's going to carry my slack.
Speaker: No, you salute and sure you have the weight of your team pushing you, but you have to go out and do what you need to do. So we have to be fully present or else you can get hurt. But also they're really good about underthink, just trust your body. You know what you're doing. You've put in so many numbers.
Speaker: And I think that mindset allows you to have the fun. Yeah. well That's cool. It's it's the the fun in sports. <unk>s It's amazing how when something's enjoyable, ah much easier it is then to, you know, to put in, ah you know, time for it. and and And sports, which starts off enjoyable, that's why every kid starts doing it is because they just, they like it. At some point, I don't know where that is, but at some point it it tips over into, you this isn't as enjoyable anymore. Um, even for kids who I think love the sport, sometimes that enjoyment level can be, i don't want to put it on the coaches cause I don't think anybody really takes any of your enjoyment. You give it up.
Speaker: Um, I've had coaches who were really hard that I didn't really even like that much, but I still like practice. Um, cause cause I love the sport and I love exactly what you said, Kendall being with,
Speaker: dudes I knew and trying to get better at something. And every rep was a chance to, you know, excel and and perfect. and And I just liked that. And I kind of put off coaches I didn't maybe care for. And most of the coaches I had were great. But, you know, I wonder what it is that um you know, what the, what the, what the solution is to somebody who's, cause it's so easy to just say, well, you just got to enjoy it. Like have fun.
Speaker: you know, mom drops a kid off. All right, have fun at practice. And okay, but how, like how, so don't, and I don't know the answer to that. And might even ask in Kendall, you or Justin, must you have it something to say on it? I don't know. Like, how would you help somebody get over the not having fun at practice?
Speaker: I feel like it's the reframe. That's what we focus on so much is like, if you know it's something you want to do, I think where a lot of kids lose it, there is kind of a certain age pattern, I feel at least with gymnastics. And it's like whenever they get close to like high school and they're like, oh, I'm going to miss out on this. Yeah. And it's them choosing what they want to prioritize. i think if you truly want to go Division I, if that's your goal, you want to keep going, you have to see it not as a sacrifice. You have to see it as a slipp like a stepping stone, essentially. So you go in, you have fun. You're like, this is going to get me where I want to be, which is more important than going to a party on Saturday or on Friday.
Speaker: So I think whenever you reframe your brain as this is an opportunity to get better each day, this is an opportunity to go do what I fell in love with as a kid, to move my body, to have fun, to be with people that are like-minded in that sense. I think it's that little reframe of your brain to be like, I get to go do this, not have to. Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, I think that's probably that's probably that's right as good as answers I've heard, honestly, because it, it and that's something that as parents and coaches, we need to talk to our kids about and help them, help them learn to reframe it or look at it that way. And and not so, because we do, we use the word sacrifice a lot. You have to give something up, you have to sacrifice. And that's kind of just embedded in the,
Speaker: the wording, the terminologies and phrasing that we use to talk about working hard is synonymous with you're going to have to sacrifice these other things. But I kind of like the way you say it and that it's not really a sacrifice. if it' I mean, you like playing the sport, right? And so you you get to do it more. and And what are you really sacrificing? Yeah, I feel like people look at the sacrifice side too much as opposed to what you gain from it.
Speaker: yeah I think it's a societal thing. i think everyone's like, oh, well, cool, you're an athlete, but look at all you're missing out on. Okay, but look at what all I'm gaining. yeah I've gained friendships. I have gained so much mental fortitude and strength and willpower and physical strength. And just like people that I never would have met and people that have changed the direction of my life and the way I view things. People that have taught me to reframe everything. Like there's so much to gain from doing a sport as opposed to looking at it as a sacrifice. And I think that's something that if...
Speaker: Clearly, you can't change society. One person can't. But even just somebody on a team, if you help to change your team's outlook, you hear a complaint. Oh, but we're missing this. okay But what are you getting from being here today? You're getting 1% better. Oh, you made a change. Oh, you're having fun here still. I think instead of, oh, you're missing out, what are you gaining? That's the biggest thing to look at. Yeah.
Speaker: I like that. Looking for the positive instead of always trying to notice the negatives in something and then reframing the situation in a way that is positive so that your brain responds that way. And and now all of a sudden this thing that you your brain thought was a sacrifice is actually a ah fun blessing that you something you get you're grateful for and you're thankful that you get to go do.
Speaker: That's good practice. that That's a... That would be, that would be a good thing for all athletes to start trying to do every day is reframing, you know, their thought process. Absolutely. Justin and Kendall, I want to ask both of you this question because you're Justin recently, you know, stopped playing, graduated college. Kendall, you're doing it.
Speaker: Um, Do you guys feel like the the resiliency piece of and having to learn how to keep going and and and you know the definition of resiliency is something along the lines of regaining its your shape or your form or after being damaged? um or hurt, you you regain your ability to perform and act and you and you keep going, right? You try again. So, you know, in your guys' of sports, how did you manage the failures or the disappointments and i get back up the next day and and get back at it again? when Did you ever have times where you were like, yeah, I don't think I want to, you know, this is too hard. i shouldn't say I don't want to do this anymore because that's okay. You may not want to do something anymore. That doesn't mean
Speaker: you're quitting, but if if you just it's time to turn the page sometimes. But did you ever have a time where you were like, I can't do this anymore, I'm not good enough, maybe I should stop? or And what got you to continue? Maybe Justin, we'll start with you.
Speaker: yeah i think I mean, my kind of journey throughout high school and then going to junior college and college was a lot of setback, people telling you you weren't good enough. And so for me, I think it kind of was similar to what we've been talking about with that kind of frame frame of mind shift and and your thoughts are a little bit different. as opposed to being, oh maybe I can't do this. It's no, I'm going to do this and I'm going to enjoy it because it's what I love to do. And my thought, I mean, when I was younger and then throughout high school, it's always I wanted to play in college. And then if I could go play in the NFL and throughout college, I kind of hit that point of
Speaker: oh, I don't know if I want to play in the NFL anymore. And so after that shift, it actually freed me up and opened me a lot more because I started enjoying every moment that I was there.
Speaker: And before it was kind of, no, I got to do this to get to the next step. And then once I decided I didn't want to get up to those steps, I wanted to go in a different direction go go somewhere else that I didn't even know where it would be.
Speaker: It was okay. Well, I need to enjoy this now because it is going to end sooner than I thought. And so I need to to keep going and keep pushing through and keep putting in that daily work and and getting better each day. But with the frame of mind that, okay, I'm I'm doing it just to enjoy it and make myself a better player, make my team a better team and impact the people around me and a more fulfilling way than I'm just trying to reach my next step.
Speaker: And I think it's, probably pretty similar to gymnastics where I noticed like every time I would go to a ah Southern Utah meet, it was everybody's cheering each other on and you compete and then everybody's huddled around you. Everybody's excited. And I mean, it's probably a special especially there at SUU. But I think that's kind of in the gymnastics culture of we're individually competing and getting better and going through falls and getting up and doing it again. But everybody's there to support you. And i really enjoy watching that part of gymnastics meets of even the people that aren't competing that day are cheering on these people that probably just took their spot or are in the way of them competing. And they're all out
Speaker: loving whoever just competed and giving them all the praise and all the congratulations. And so I kind of, as the more I watched that and went to gymnastics meets and and talked to coach Bowman and, and some of the other coaches there, it was like, there's some stuff I can learn here too, that we can apply over to the football team. And I think everybody can apply it into their own individual sports because we all at the end of the day, we're all doing what we need to do. Like in football, we would say we're doing our one 11 everybody else needs to do theirs, but we need to come together to be able to do it as a team and to become something greater than just ourselves. And so I think that resiliency part of it was, was special to me at the end of my career because of some of those things we talked about. Yeah.
Speaker: That's the best part of our meets for sure, by the way. The little like huddles at the end celebration. But mine was for sure my first semester freshman year. It was brutal. I cried almost every day. i would put so much pressure on myself to hit in bars because i wanted to be in a lineup. But then because I would like be so serious I would make mistakes and then I wouldn't look to myself. I would blame other people. i wouldn't reframe. I was all over the place. I was absolutely a menace in that gym. I know for sure I was. And I had a senior, Justin, you probably know her. I had Aubrey Schwartz.
Speaker: Love her to death. She looks at me one day. Because we were we were short on bars. We didn't have a lot of kids. She looks at me and she goes, i don't know what you're doing, but you need to get your head out of your butt because we need you.
Speaker: And you're not helping anybody. Those were her exact words. And I was like, oh, hang on. And for some reason, that's what got through to me. So from that day on, I said, okay, this is not my routine. This is for the team and I need to hit for my team.
Speaker: So I stopped putting pressure on myself and I started looking inward. I said, okay, what can I do? What can I think that's going to help not just me, but my team? Because they did need me and I needed to be there for them. Because this wasn't all about me anymore. So instead of looking down on myself and getting hard on myself and, oh, I made this mistake. Okay, what can I learn from the turn I just took?
Speaker: What can I change? What can I do differently? And so sometimes I used my team and I leaned on them and they were there for me. And so it got to the point where the first meet of that season, I got to exhibition, which is essentially like kid seven, you go, you compete, but it doesn't count towards the team score.
Speaker: And I will never forget. It was the day before like my birthday. So there were so many things going on and I got to go and I hit this pretty great routine for me.
Speaker: And I watched the video back and you know who was cheering the loudest and hitting the podium and going crazy? The senior who called me out. Aubrey. And that just community and you just build so much love for each other because everyone really does want you to succeed.
Speaker: So whenever you learn to be resilient and to look at like failure is an opportunity to grow. It is not final. That's one of our biggest things is failure is not final. You look at it, what can you learn from it? How can you get better? And from there, you're not scared to make a mistake anymore. And that was the biggest thing for me. I was so terrified of messing up.
Speaker: and I would blame it on other people. And the second she got me to flip that switch, I was like, okay, no, this is on me. Let me look at it. How can I grow from the turn I just took?
Speaker: And when you are able to change that switch in your head, you start doing things for other people, you become more resilient. You become easier to work with. You become more coachable. You become actually part of your team. You're able to settle into that culture and not only make yourself better, but then you're also able to push the people around you. And then our whole team gets better, not just you. So I think whenever you're able to view yourself as, Hey, this is on me, but also this is part of a team and we can push each other to grow together.
Speaker: Yeah. And I think, I think what you both said is, is spot on Kendall, that, that teammate of yours that, you know, got after you a little bit.
Speaker: The other thing that I would add to is because coaches do this oftentimes too, is when someone turns to you and says, Hey, i don't know what's going on with you, but, you know, get your crap figured out and let's go like it's go time and we need you and right. Like stop it.
Speaker: You know, there's, they're not saying that if they don't believe you can do it yeah right. Like as a coach, I'm not saying that to somebody who i have no confidence can go in and actually perform. It's the kid who I believe in, who's just in a funk where sometimes you get to the point where you're like, all right, dude, like stop it.
Speaker: Like whatever's going on in that head of yours, pull your head out and let's go. Like we need you and you're ready and we're counting on you. and And sometimes I think you're right. It takes us saying, wait a minute, I'm doubting myself. And all I'm doing is focusing on the negatives. You say reframe, which I love. And sometimes as a coach or as a leader, it it takes one of them to tell us that hey, let's go. We need you. You're good.
Speaker: We're counting on you because you can do it. You wouldn't be here if we didn't think you could do it. So stop doubting yourself, right? Get out of your head and just go and do what we brought you here to do. And when you get over that and say, yeah, I am here for, I can do this. Like, and they believe in me. And like you said, I'm doing this for everybody and stop worrying about me so much and because people don't feel sorry for you, right? And most people are glad that you're you're struggling with whatever it is you're struggling with, right? A lot of people either don't care. I heard the quote, right? You probably heard it. Either don't care and the other half are glad you're struggling, right? And so
Speaker: it's it You got to figure it out yourself. and And that's not going to happen blaming people or, you know, hoping that mom or dad or somebody will tell you, hey, you're good. And the coach is just an idiot or it's your team's fault or it's the ref's fault or whatever. It's it's look, you've got to get out of your own head here.
Speaker: And how you do that is realize you're here because somebody believed in you. When a coach puts you in, it's because they believe in you. Your players are, you know, cheering you on and pulling for you. It's because they want to see you succeed because they believe you can. And they know that in doing that, they're going to succeed. So go be good. Go be great. Go be what you're capable of, you know, and cut all the negative thoughts out and just focus on what, like you said earlier, Kendall, what could happen? Yeah, this, this, this could go wrong.
Speaker: my wife has a big frame right in our garage that the kids, they're a poster right in the garage where, um you know, when the kids walk into the house, they see it and it it says something along the lines of, um, you know, what, what, uh, the, something along the lines of focusing on, you know, the good that could also happen, not just,
Speaker: Not just the bad that can happen, but what about all the good that could happen? You know, focus on all the good that could happen as well instead of all the bad that could happen. Right. And it's reframing, Kendall. Right. yeah Something that we also say, and this is something that helps is what if it all goes right?
Speaker: if you're going to think about what what if it all goes exactly how you could like the best chance scenario. yeah And so i am so glad that she was able to call me out and I was, she was able to help me get out of my own way essentially. Cause my junior year that I just had, I competed essentially every meet on bars and it was the best season I could have ever asked for. And I had so much fun and Like Justin said, I got to celebrate with my team after, which is the most fun part ever, because every kid in there and my year and up got to watch me grow through that and I got to grow with them.
Speaker: And so it was an incredible experience last year. And I remember the first time I actually competed was my sophomore year. And I had, I was crying and I had girls that watched me go through like some of the crap that I went through and they cried with me. And so whenever you get to go through that and watch your teammates grow and figure themselves out and blossom from something that they thought at that point was going to be final because I was so in my own way that I was like, oh my goodness, I don't know what I'm ever going to do. If I could have gone and told myself, hey, you're going to figure this out, you're going to be fine, and seen the junior year that I was going to have,
Speaker: I would have been like in disbelief, but I had people that believed in me. I had people that cared enough. They knew I had it in me that they were going to keep pushing me. And I'm so blessed that I had them because the junior year that i just had was more than I ever could have dreamed of. It was so fun. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, finding that support system is something i think we've, you just touched on it, Kendall, and that's what I was thinking of when you were talking, to Dustin, was you got to have people around you. There are going to be people that want to see you fail and that don't care. And there are a few that you got to find that do really care and they're invested in your success and and your outcomes and your processes. And I mean, that sounds like that's how Aubrey was for you. And i think we can all kind of point to people in our lives and the listeners can point to people in their lives that are cheering them on and kind of cling to those people and and make sure that they're telling you what you need to hear too, like like Aubrey did. And it was get your crap together. It wasn't just, no, you're good, you're good, you're good. yeah Sometimes you got to hear that extra stuff that you don't necessarily want to hear. But when it comes from the people that you trust, I think we're usually a lot more open to to hearing it.
Speaker: And that's the key, Justin, I think, is that when we're in those situations, that we're not overly, um we don't make a mistake by trying to support and be loving and caring and understanding so much that in doing so, we, we rob the person of the chance to learn how to be resilient and be tough. And you rob them when you say, a look, it's not your fault.
Speaker: It's everybody else. You got, you're getting, you know, you're, you're screwed. It's the ref, it's the coach, it's the whatever, right? When we, when we say that stuff to somebody, we might be offloading some of the,
Speaker: some of the disappointment because they're now able to say, yeah, you're right, it is somebody else. And so they don't feel responsible anymore. And then maybe they feel a little bit better, little less stressed because they're able to blame it on everyone. But at the end of the day, that's going to come right back and slap you right in the face, right? So yeah, I think is when we're in those situations,
Speaker: Yeah, Justin, those people you talk about that do care about you and do love you have to love you enough to sometimes tell you the brutal truth. Yeah. And that is that, look, I love you whether you do well or not.
Speaker: um But you're you got to figure some things out and it's nobody else that's going to figure it out. But you if you want to do well in this sport or if you want to just enjoy it, maybe you don't care about doing great, but you want to enjoy it You have to change your attitude because what I see out there is not what I saw before.
Speaker: a year ago or a month ago, like your your body language is bad, the way you talk and complain, like we gotta to sometimes tell those people that we're closest to truth and it might hurt, but like Kendall said,
Speaker: They're going And Justin, I'm sure you... you yeah don't i I mean, I was talking to you during all of this time, and and I always believed in you, but I was never... Justin, it's everybody else's fault. It was Justin, you've got to get better. You've just got to keep fighting. I think you've still got more there, and you've got to keep at it. And if you do, I still think you can. and But you never had...
Speaker: me or your dad or others that were just saying, oh, Justin, just, it's just because everybody doesn't like you because you didn't go to a big high school or because you're right at whatever. yeah It was just, dude, you just got to get better and go and win it. You know, and i don't, it's not going to be easy. You're gonna have to walk on and just bust your tail. And there's just sometimes time to it takes what it takes, right?
Speaker: And that's it. It just, it takes what it takes. And sometimes that's ugly and hard and we don't do anybody any favors, right? by giving them that easy out of, well, it's somebody else's fault.
Speaker: Yeah. I think sometimes self-reflecting is uncomfortable. um But I think in order to grow, you have to be uncomfortable. And I think that lot of people in sports are scared of that. They don't want to feel like something is their fault. They don't want to feel nervous. They don't want to feel like, oh, I made a mistake. Let me go look into myself because that's uncomfortable a lot of the times. Yeah. I think the best athletes grow quickly and they adapt because they're okay being uncomfortable. Whether it's, oh, you're nervous to try something new or literally the thought of just being like, okay, I made a mistake. Let me look at that in myself as opposed to reflecting onto someone else.
Speaker: I think that's a huge part of growing is knowing that it's you have to look into yourself and get uncomfortable in order to move forward. and I think that's something that a lot of athletes can do better. And me included still. That's something I still work on every single day. But in order to grow, you do have to find yourself in moments that you don't want to be in sometimes, but you have to work through them, whether that's acknowledging you made an error or just letting yourself be in a period of nervousness and like discomfort, trying a new skill in order to get better.
Speaker: yeah And understand that that's part of the process, right? The the uncomfortable and the I'm going to fail a little bit, but never the cross. It never crosses your mind that I can't do this. You can't let that cross your mind. It has to be, no, I can do this. I just got to figure it out.
Speaker: And I'm struggling with it right now. But every time anybody tries something that's new or difficult or harder, they're going to go through a ah learning so process where they're trying to figure it out. And instead of saying, oh, this, i just can't do this. It's nope.
Speaker: I, another day I got to go and try it again. I got to try a different angle. I got to talk to a different coach. You gotta, you just, you don't give it up, you know? And, and eventually you'll, you know, you'll, you'll realize, okay, I'm, I'm, I'm doing that. And then somebody may tell you, yeah, you're doing it, but it's not good enough. We can't have you on the team anymore, but okay.
Speaker: I, I maxed it out. I got, I did as well as I think I can do. And it's not good enough. That happens to everybody. at some point in their career where somebody tells them, you get cut, you don't make an Olympic team, you don't make an NFL team, you don't get drafted, you don't make like, you don't go, you don't get the scholarship or whatever. And it's okay. The real, I think peace can come as an athlete and just as a human and knowing I gave all I had to my skillset, I maximized my ability
Speaker: Okay, and this is how far it got me. next Next thing, what's the next chapter? And then not dwelling on woulda, coulda, shouldas. It's what's the next chapter and what am I gonna go tackle now? And that might be something completely 180 from gymnastics or football, or right? it's it's i may be a I'm gonna work, I'm gonna have a family, whatever.
Speaker: um Well, guys, look, I think we've we've probably hit the hit the time limit here. Kendall, thanks so much for for hopping on with us. Of course. Thank you for having me.
Speaker: It's fun to have a gymnast on. That's not something we get on you know very often. And somebody who's articulate and and expressive as you were, you were a great guest. told some You shared some great things and and stuff we're going to use, I'm sure, in the future. So thanks so much for hopping on.
Speaker: Of course. Thank you. I've got a pretty great support system here that's instilled a lot. So yeah. it's them I had no idea that Southern Utah has such a great gymnastics program. So I'm glad I know that. Pretty sweet. Tune in. Back 12 this year. so Okay. Oh, okay. Let's go. I like that. Very cool. I did i did i knew some there was an athlete that was part of a especially for athletes years ago that did gymnastics.
Speaker: and um And so I knew it was down there. I just didn't realize you were regularly in the top 25. That's awesome. It's a great time. Yeah. Well, good luck to you this year. We'll be following you. Thank you. I appreciate y'all.
Speaker: And Justin, thanks again, buddy, for for helping us out. Yeah, of course. how you day To everybody else, please be aware of others. Do what's right. Athletes, keep your eyes up. Do the work. Parents, let's make sure that we're we're pushing these kids, but we're also talking with them and making sure that they're doing okay because a lot of them are are struggling. So let's all keep our eyes up and do the work.
Speaker: Thank you for joining the Especially for Athletes podcast. To learn more about Especially for Athletes organization, get a copy of our book, The Sport Light, or to bring our program to your team, school, business, or organization, visit us at especiallyforathletes.org.
