Transcript
Speaker: two and a half minutes that two and a half minutes i'm winded you know who else is winded who's that hey there everybody
Speaker: Welcome back to Pixlet.
Speaker: My name is Kevin.
Speaker: With me, as always, for a second take, is Phil.
Speaker: And today on the show, we're talking about Doom, the movie, the video game, the movie.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Colon, colon, colon.
Speaker: Colon, colon, colon.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Doom, the 2005 movie directed by Andrzej Barkowiak, starring Karl Urban.
Speaker: Rosamund Pike and Dwayne The Rock Johnson.
Speaker: And yeah, it's a movie.
Speaker: It sure is.
Speaker: It's a movie.
Speaker: It was filmed.
Speaker: It was filmed and it was released in 2005.
Speaker: And it most certainly is...
Speaker: the most doom three movie that ever existed.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It lines up nicely.
Speaker: Doesn't it?
Speaker: Doom.
Speaker: The movie is just doom three.
Speaker: The movie, if you really want to, want to put it, I need to sit down and play doom three.
Speaker: Cause I haven't played in a while, but I remember it somewhat fondly, but I also remember going, this isn't really doom.
Speaker: Is it?
Speaker: This is something else.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: What happened to rip and tear?
Speaker: There's no rip and tear.
Speaker: No rip and tear.
Speaker: There's nothing.
Speaker: This is what happens when you make a Doom game and then a Doom movie based on that game without John Romero.
Speaker: That's all I'm going to say.
Speaker: Pretty much.
Speaker: You forget what brought you here.
Speaker: As you were saying in the take that didn't happen.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: This movie has thrown off the shackles of self-awareness.
Speaker: Yes, it doesn't.
Speaker: It's just completely unburdened with any level of intellect.
Speaker: It's just early 2000s cornball.
Speaker: We are so fucking cool.
Speaker: Trademark.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Kind of shit.
Speaker: And that actually could work and does work with this kind of thing.
Speaker: But you have to have the self-awareness.
Speaker: You can't actually be the former captain of the football team in his mid-40s going, I'm totally impressing all these 16-year-olds with my stories of the time I single-handedly won us the big game.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You can't actually think that.
Speaker: So, yeah.
Speaker: For all the good The Matrix did for sci-fi and as a trans allegory and all that fun stuff, it also did innumerable damage to the sci-fi genre for a few years where everybody just had to look as fucking cool as possible without anyone like...
Speaker: really thinking about like there's no self-awareness or anything like that.
Speaker: It's just I'm so cool.
Speaker: If you don't have a pleather long coat and wrap around sunglasses get the fuck out.
Speaker: Get the fuck out of here.
Speaker: I don't want you in my 2003 science fiction film.
Speaker: I don't want you in equilibrium.
Speaker: Not at all.
Speaker: Oh, equilibrium.
Speaker: With gun-fu.
Speaker: With gun-kata.
Speaker: Gun-kata.
Speaker: That's what it is.
Speaker: That's what it is.
Speaker: An actual martial art.
Speaker: Developed for fucking guns.
Speaker: Where you fight with a gun in your hand.
Speaker: And your gun is your sword.
Speaker: And you're going pew, pew, pew, pew.
Speaker: It's so ridiculous.
Speaker: And some of those pews are just the sound of guns hitting each other.
Speaker: And some of those sounds are actual gunshots.
Speaker: And some of them are Christian Bale under his breath going pew, pew, pew, pew.
Speaker: Christian Bale.
Speaker: He's a thorough method actor.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Except...
Speaker: when it comes to going pew, pew, pew.
Speaker: Yes, exactly.
Speaker: He's always breaking character.
Speaker: And they got a, that was actually the fight on the Terminator Resistance set.
Speaker: We're done professionally, man.
Speaker: We're done professionally, man.
Speaker: You're a nice guy.
Speaker: You're a nice guy.
Speaker: I remember that moment.
Speaker: Un-fucking-professional.
Speaker: I remember because we were in a class when that all went down.
Speaker: We were.
Speaker: Me and Kevin were in film school when that whole thing leaked and even talked to our professor about it.
Speaker: Our professor was like, oh, no, yeah, you don't treat your people like that.
Speaker: It was funny.
Speaker: Like, yeah, you cannot, you're not going to, it's going to be hard to recover from that.
Speaker: And it was.
Speaker: Un-fucking-professional.
Speaker: Yeah, so, what movie are we talking about?
Speaker: Doom.
Speaker: Street Fighter.
Speaker: Oh, no, sorry, Doom, yeah.
Speaker: You guys already did, you and Ryan did that already, so.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, let's... But this actually, this was, hold on, this was directed by the same guy who did Street Fighter, The Legend of Chun-Li, so you know...
Speaker: It must be good.
Speaker: So let's put this ding-dang body in the marsh.
Speaker: Let's do.
Speaker: Let's watch this body slowly sink into the marsh.
Speaker: This ain't reality TV!
Speaker: All right.
Speaker: So Doom, the film, the movie, the game.
Speaker: Basically.
Speaker: All right.
Speaker: So the.
Speaker: You were off to a good start.
Speaker: Kevin's already just like, okay, Jesus Christ.
Speaker: The scene of the movie is, there's like some ancient aliens vibes basically.
Speaker: Mm-hmm.
Speaker: The conceit of the movie is that in 2026, they found a thing in the desert.
Speaker: It's in the Nevada desert.
Speaker: It's called the Ark.
Speaker: And it's a transportation thing over to Mars to an abandoned facility in Mars.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Leaves a lot of questions for me.
Speaker: Who like did the first guy go through it and just like die of asphyxiation?
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Is there atmosphere?
Speaker: Did they build out that entire base around it?
Speaker: What's going on here?
Speaker: I couldn't help but feel like that would have been a way more interesting movie.
Speaker: When they're explaining the exposition, they're like, they found this thing in the desert and it takes you to a completely unknown, abandoned alien base.
Speaker: And, and like, and it's like, oh shit, well that sounds like a lot of mystery and intrigue and science fiction goodness.
Speaker: And it's like, so we're going to talk about some unrelated thing that happened several decades later.
Speaker: Oh, okay.
Speaker: Yeah, that's just how they get to Mars and back.
Speaker: And we're like, okay, cool, cool.
Speaker: Anyway, so we get we get an opening with some scientists running around.
Speaker: They're super scurred.
Speaker: The scientist is named Dr. Carmack.
Speaker: Gamers.
Speaker: Easter egg number one.
Speaker: And we're not even five minutes in.
Speaker: Easter egg number one.
Speaker: How many Easter eggs are you going to get?
Speaker: Not as many as you'd expect.
Speaker: Like four or five, something like that.
Speaker: Like a couple.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's not.
Speaker: Because honestly, this movie doesn't really resemble Doom in any way, shape or form.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So yeah, it was tough for them to make Easter eggs, you know, because they're trying to make a completely different franchise.
Speaker: Sure.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: They wanted to make aliens.
Speaker: That's what they were trying to make.
Speaker: They did.
Speaker: So they're running away from a monster that you don't see and it's in the shadows and all that stuff.
Speaker: And Dr. Carmack, he like gets into a,
Speaker: uh, his room and the monster is going like, rah, and rips the door open, but he sends out for help.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And then we cut to Dwayne, the rock Johnson, who is a Sergeant of, um, let me be clear.
Speaker: He is the Sergeant of a Marine unit.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: We can't emphasize that enough.
Speaker: They are Marines.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Why am I emphasizing that they are Marines?
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Because the sergeant calls his troops soldiers through the entire goddamn movie.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And I have never heard of a Marine willingly referred to as a soldier.
Speaker: They're not big fans of that one.
Speaker: They're not big fans of that because soldier implies army.
Speaker: They are not in the army.
Speaker: They are Marines.
Speaker: They are Marines.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: But by God, does The Rock have Semper Fidelis tattooed across his shoulders?
Speaker: Yes, Semper Fi across his big, broad shoulders.
Speaker: Those shoulders still not broad enough to carry this movie.
Speaker: No, not even close.
Speaker: I mean, but this makes sense for him because as the film goes on, we get a...
Speaker: We get kind of paper thin characterization of a lot of these characters, but The Rock's character is never anything more than Marine.
Speaker: That is if Ken beaches and The Rock Marines, that's his whole thing.
Speaker: Ken is beach.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Rock is marine.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So we cut over to his his unit and they're all getting ready to go on on break.
Speaker: And each of these guys, you know, they're it's your standard predator sequence of like each of them is has their own little unique quirk.
Speaker: Um, one of them is like super Christian.
Speaker: Uh, I think, yeah.
Speaker: Like he's like old fashioned Catholic mea culpa style.
Speaker: Like, yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: One of them is, is, uh, is we have our, our lone transphobic comment of the, of the movie.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Where, you know, the one guy is coded as perverted and he decided, you know, they decide like he's perverted because he likes, uh,
Speaker: trans women.
Speaker: And the audience is watching this in 2023.
Speaker: It's like,
Speaker: swing that bat, my friend, knock yourself out.
Speaker: But then everyone goes, you're a, you're disgusting.
Speaker: You're, you're foul.
Speaker: You're a terrible man.
Speaker: Oh, boo hoo hoo.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So anyway, that seems played for played for laughs, which is unfortunate.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And then we get introduced.
Speaker: One of them likes video games.
Speaker: He's playing like a video game.
Speaker: This is 2046.
Speaker: He's playing a video game.
Speaker: It looks like a knockoff Tiger Electronics.
Speaker: It really does.
Speaker: It looks bad.
Speaker: From, you know, 1987.
Speaker: Looks like an old Game Boy Advance.
Speaker: A couple of them are playing our, what's it called?
Speaker: It's Pepper.
Speaker: Pepper.
Speaker: It's where you toss a ball.
Speaker: Oh, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: And you hit it back.
Speaker: Hit it back, yeah.
Speaker: They're just knocking shit around because they're dumb Marines.
Speaker: Like, that's their whole thing.
Speaker: Prototypical dumb boy Marines.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And then The Rock comes down and he's like, hey, your leave's canceled.
Speaker: And then they're all gearing up.
Speaker: And then...
Speaker: the last guy to come in who is not just to show how he is stands apart from the rest of the Marines.
Speaker: He's like, he was, he was off doing something else is, uh, Carl Urban.
Speaker: Judge Dredd himself.
Speaker: Judge Dredd himself.
Speaker: Uh, Billy Butcher himself.
Speaker: Hell yeah.
Speaker: Um, that man, if you had told me watching this film, one of the, that like,
Speaker: both him and the rock were going to have like actually incredible careers following this film.
Speaker: I've been like, okay now, uh, and I'm going to go ahead and invest in NFTs.
Speaker: That sounds real good.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It is amazing.
Speaker: The careers that both of them have had since this film.
Speaker: Uh, but yeah, yeah.
Speaker: He, he's, he's not like the other Marines.
Speaker: He's, he's not like the other Marines.
Speaker: He's a cool Marine.
Speaker: His, his name is, uh, is it, it's like John Grimm or something.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: His code name Reaper.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Um,
Speaker: And so, yeah, he's like, leaves, the leaves canceled, but you don't have to come with us.
Speaker: And he's like, he's like, why?
Speaker: I'm a Marine.
Speaker: I go where you go.
Speaker: And he's like, well, we're going to old Dubai.
Speaker: And he's like, oh, and he's like, so you don't have to come.
Speaker: A shadow fills the room.
Speaker: And a shadow fills the room.
Speaker: Frankie foreshadowing comes into the room.
Speaker: Yeah, exactly.
Speaker: check off's foreshadowing and pops in so uh yeah he he's like well i'm going anyway and then they they gear up they do their shit uh they have this moment where they stand pointlessly in like a triangle formation to show how cool they are deeply x-men it was deeply x-men yeah
Speaker: the camera swoops down and they're all like, yeah, poses like it was posed with their guns.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's like a loading screen for a call of duty match.
Speaker: You know, it's, it's yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: There's, um, yeah, there's like, and there's one other guy he's called the kid, uh, cause he's a rookie.
Speaker: Um, so, uh, he's your, he's your ex-com guy who, uh, he, he doesn't even have.
Speaker: No, he doesn't have a specialist, a specialist, uh, role yet.
Speaker: He's just a guy with a, with a gun.
Speaker: So yeah, which is, which you gotta, you gotta start somewhere.
Speaker: And we get one of the first, like very, now that entire scene, uh,
Speaker: is super aliens predator, everything like that.
Speaker: But we get one of our first direct rip offs from aliens where, um, one of them asks if, uh, I forget which one, cause I hadn't fully, I wasn't making memories at that point.
Speaker: Uh, but one of them asks if they'd ever done this before.
Speaker: And he says, I in training, I've done simulation.
Speaker: So it's like the, it's like the, the officer on the way down being like, yeah,
Speaker: So many combat drocks simulated, you know.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And that, honestly, that tells you right off the bat the trouble we're going to run into.
Speaker: Because this movie, you have already something that you're trying to imitate.
Speaker: And that's Doom.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: But this movie wanted to be aliens instead.
Speaker: Yeah, you have one thing you need, like, you're not focusing on the thing you need to focus on.
Speaker: Right, right.
Speaker: Is what the issue is.
Speaker: You've already got source material that you have to imitate.
Speaker: We don't have time, man.
Speaker: Yeah, we don't have time for this.
Speaker: No.
Speaker: So they go down to the arc, which is just, like, perfect mid-2000s.
Speaker: Hey, we can make weird little blobby-globby things floating in the air.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Everyone's still chasing that T-1000 dream.
Speaker: That T-1000 dream.
Speaker: And you step into the arc and you get, you get patoo.
Speaker: It's so fucking true.
Speaker: You get patooed from Earth to Mars.
Speaker: Yeah, that's pretty much it.
Speaker: Just spat out.
Speaker: And you get on the other side and it's like, they're all like vomiting because it's a tough ride, obviously.
Speaker: One must imagine Sisyphus being pitued.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So, yeah, they get there and they meet a guy named Pinky.
Speaker: Paul Reiser character.
Speaker: He's our Paul Reiser character.
Speaker: He's like the what is his job?
Speaker: Is he like in charge of the arc or is he just so?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And he's in and he's in like a wheelchair or something because they're complaining about the about the travel travel.
Speaker: And he he turns out he was one of the first people to test drive this.
Speaker: And I got ripped in half by it.
Speaker: Yeah, you got cut in half.
Speaker: So, yeah, one one part of him went to one galaxy and his ass went to the other.
Speaker: And yes.
Speaker: And then he very seriously looks at everyone and says, you can call me Pinky, which right on.
Speaker: Right on.
Speaker: Right on.
Speaker: Because sure.
Speaker: Sure.
Speaker: I know what a pinky demon is.
Speaker: I get it.
Speaker: Uh-huh.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's like, got it.
Speaker: Got it.
Speaker: I know where this is going.
Speaker: Like, I know where this is going.
Speaker: I know where this is going.
Speaker: So we meet Dr. Samantha Grimm.
Speaker: Dr. Hot.
Speaker: I have written down here.
Speaker: Dr. Hot.
Speaker: Dr. Hot.
Speaker: She is, all the guys are like, oh, oh.
Speaker: Yeah, sniffing around her immediately, including Sergeant Creepy, who, by the way, could have been a fucking progressive icon if he had just, if he had like stood his ground, but like, no, fuck you.
Speaker: I'll fuck whoever I want to fuck.
Speaker: But then it turns out he is a gross, gross human being.
Speaker: Well, you can tell, like, as soon as you have a blonde guy with slick back hair,
Speaker: It's a giveaway.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's a giveaway.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Because just the amount of stuff he had in his hair to keep it slicked back.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: That was just natural grease.
Speaker: That was just because he's a slimy, slimy character.
Speaker: Naturally greasy.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Just gross.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So, yeah, the one of the guys is a Duke Duke.
Speaker: Is that that guy that the guy's name?
Speaker: Duke.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Duke is like it goes to Reaper.
Speaker: Like, how'd you get a piece of ass like that get away?
Speaker: And Reaper's like, she's my sister.
Speaker: Yeah, they haven't seen each other in 10 years.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So she's touring them around, and she's like, this is Dr. Carmack.
Speaker: Basically, we get a whole bunch, and it's not in my head anymore.
Speaker: No, nor should it be.
Speaker: You've got more important things, Phil.
Speaker: There's just like a list of fucking things they need to get.
Speaker: Like, we need to recover.
Speaker: You've got a big exposition dump.
Speaker: Exposition dump.
Speaker: We have three MacGuffins.
Speaker: We got this.
Speaker: We got Dr. Carmack, and we got this.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And that's like...
Speaker: That's pretty much it.
Speaker: Yeah, that's pretty much it.
Speaker: At no point do we ever establish whether these Marines are UAC Marines necessarily or U.S. Marines.
Speaker: Like because there's some like consternation amongst them.
Speaker: about like, ah, I'm not paid to get stuff for people.
Speaker: And they're like, well, if you're paid by the UAC, then... Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: It isn't clear.
Speaker: Some of them act like they're private contractors and others act like...
Speaker: You know, they've actually got some level of duty to everything, especially the Rock.
Speaker: By God, he's a Marine.
Speaker: Boy, is he ever a Marine.
Speaker: And what I need are soldiers.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Speaker: Oh, man.
Speaker: Oh, rock.
Speaker: He, I mean, I'll tell you what, whoever, whoever was his acting coach that got him out of this, uh, cause he's not a bad actor, especially these days.
Speaker: But, but back then he needed, he needed more work.
Speaker: So whoever was his coach, I would be, I would have that in my goddamn like pitch.
Speaker: I'd be like, I took the rock from this to this, like that.
Speaker: Oh, here's my money.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Sounds great.
Speaker: When do we start?
Speaker: Because it's, bless him, he's trying.
Speaker: He's trying, but... He's trying so dang hard.
Speaker: Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy.
Speaker: There is a scene, and at this point, most of the scenes just kind of jumbled together for me.
Speaker: It doesn't really matter what order they happen in, but there's a scene where Carl Urban and, what's her name, Rosamund Pike are in a room together.
Speaker: And they're talking about like, so the conceit of the aliens is like, there's a 24th chromosome that, an artificial 24th chromosome that basically this group of people on Mars had created that made people better.
Speaker: But for a certain few, it turned them into monsters.
Speaker: And that's what doomed the civilization on Mars.
Speaker: And they use that arc to escape to Earth.
Speaker: And they are actually humans.
Speaker: like the humans that didn't do adopt the 24th chromosome went to earth.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You'll note that, uh, at no point, uh, in Kevin's retelling of that, did they say opened a portal to hell or demon or no, no, we're, we're talking about a genetically engineered, uh, monsters.
Speaker: Yeah, exactly.
Speaker: But Zambos in that scene, I'm watching that scene and it's Carl Urban and Rosamund Pike.
Speaker: like acting together.
Speaker: I was like, wow, these two are just acting around like acting.
Speaker: This is just the best act.
Speaker: These two acting off of each other is the best acting we're going to get in the movie, isn't it?
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Especially Rosamund Pike, who like is a very, very talented actress and pops up in prestige movies all the time.
Speaker: And that they were nominated for gone girl.
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: And they just must have driven a dump truck of money to her house.
Speaker: And she's like, I do need a new pool.
Speaker: So when she started, she was like, I think she was like the hot girl when she started.
Speaker: Really?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So she started as a bond girl.
Speaker: Oh, well, fuck me then.
Speaker: I always think of her in like, like pride and prejudice and shit.
Speaker: She kind of like worked her way into the prestige stuff.
Speaker: But when her career started, I think she was like, she was like, oh, it's, you know, we need a hot Brit, you know?
Speaker: Son of a bitch, she was, she was die another day.
Speaker: I'll be damned.
Speaker: And then she was in the libertine, which I remember that one.
Speaker: And she didn't probably.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So she, but you're right.
Speaker: She, she did start out her film career as a bond girl.
Speaker: That's hilarious.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Oh, what the fuck?
Speaker: And, and then people gradually over time realized, Oh, she had, she has some chops, you know, she's, she's an incredibly talented actress.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So she, um,
Speaker: So anyway, this scene between the scene where they're discussing all this between Carl Urban and they're they got the sci fi techno babble and her and Carl Urban are just going back and forth and really getting into it.
Speaker: Okay, so we got two really good actors, a bunch of jobbers and The Rock.
Speaker: Yeah, pretty much.
Speaker: Everybody else is fine.
Speaker: They're not required to really do anything more than one note the entire movie.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Um, so shit starts going, uh, wrong.
Speaker: They find Dr. Carmack.
Speaker: He rips his ear off.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Um, because he's, he's scared.
Speaker: Um, and then they find him.
Speaker: He's clutching the severed forearm and the hand of the scientist who had been chasing him in the first scene.
Speaker: Like it's a baby doll, uh, which is, yeah.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: That's a choice.
Speaker: He has some, he has some guilt, I assume, um,
Speaker: With like closing her, like closing the door on her.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: We'll go with that.
Speaker: That's that, that probably makes way more sense than they, they gave it credit for.
Speaker: So yeah, let's go with that.
Speaker: The, the, the group splits up perfect thing for horror movies and they're all, you know, they're all around the, the, the place.
Speaker: Um,
Speaker: So they kill one of the creatures and before they kill it, it attacks Goat and like hits him in the neck with a slimy thing.
Speaker: Like a tadpole kind of thing.
Speaker: Just kind of.
Speaker: Goes bleh.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: The tadpole bites his neck and then.
Speaker: Squirm's way.
Speaker: They kill the creature.
Speaker: So goat is dice.
Speaker: They try to resuscitate him.
Speaker: They give him they do everything.
Speaker: They get defib, adrenaline, et cetera.
Speaker: They're really broken up over goat dying.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He's the ultra religious one.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He's the ultra religious one.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He actually cuts himself at some point because he, quote, took the Lord's name in vain.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And it like we're dealing with that level of Dan Brown, Tom.
Speaker: He belongs in the world of blasphemous.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Precisely.
Speaker: Wrong video game adaptation, guys.
Speaker: Wrong video game adaptation for this guy.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Seriously.
Speaker: So Goat dies.
Speaker: They perform an autopsy.
Speaker: The group splits up again.
Speaker: They're always coming together and splitting up.
Speaker: They perform an autopsy.
Speaker: Sam performs an autopsy on the monster body.
Speaker: And she's like, there's like...
Speaker: stuff in here there's human stuff it's it's people it's it's a very it's it's it's the john carpenter's the thing autopsy yeah it's like just like these are this is nothing wrong there's a heart kidneys lungs all that shit but it's a monster like okay saw that movie too all right damn it
Speaker: Stop referencing way better movies.
Speaker: It's making it's not making you look better.
Speaker: Stop inviting the comparison, please.
Speaker: Yes, exactly.
Speaker: Exactly.
Speaker: There's a moment where Sam and Duke are here.
Speaker: Something something.
Speaker: happens and they're invest duke is investigating and uh uh he's like looking at a oh sweet sweet pupper and he's like pointing his gun at the dog and the dog is growling the dog isn't growling at him though right oh no the dog fucks off
Speaker: because there's a monster behind Duke.
Speaker: Oh, yes.
Speaker: Duke runs away and he goes through the nano wall and he shuts the nano wall on the monster.
Speaker: And he's like, this is why I don't fuck with nano walls.
Speaker: And like the monster is like stuck in the nano wall.
Speaker: And they identify that the monster is Dr. Carmack because it's missing an ear.
Speaker: It's missing an ear.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: And at one point she says this had its appendix removed.
Speaker: This is a person.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: I thought that was kind of a cool detail.
Speaker: I was like, OK, that's interesting.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And this all this fucking stuff happens together.
Speaker: Basically, at one point, goat wakes up.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And he realizes that he's turning into a monster.
Speaker: So he kills himself by slamming his head into the wall until he dies.
Speaker: Which was a nice touch for the ultra religious guy.
Speaker: He crosses himself.
Speaker: He does the sign of the cross.
Speaker: That's right.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: And then, and then kills himself.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: They, they start like the full evac of the entire place, trying to get everybody out.
Speaker: And Sergeant creepy, uh, starts, uh, having his Hudson game over man, game over freak out moment.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yep.
Speaker: I'd like to point out also earlier when they first landed, when they first landed in this facility and they said that they were on a, they were on a, a stage four quarantine or something like that.
Speaker: This guy immediately started walking up to all the women in the room, all the civvies there and saying like, I'm sorry, ma'am, it's a stage four quarantine.
Speaker: I'm going to have to ask you to undress.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Like, just like that.
Speaker: Like, that's how I'm going to have to ask you to impress.
Speaker: Like, and everyone just kind of goes, that's our quagmire, you know, and it's just, it's, it's, I refuse to believe that even by 2005 standards, that that wasn't like deeply unsettling for a lot of people.
Speaker: That's, it wasn't.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: Family guy is still on the air.
Speaker: Fair enough.
Speaker: Fair enough.
Speaker: I just I just I feel like I feel like even in 2005, we're like, that guy should not be in charge of people.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: No, he shouldn't be.
Speaker: He should not.
Speaker: Meanwhile, while they're out, what's his name?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Portman, the creepy guy.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He's been pretty at this point.
Speaker: He's like pretty upset.
Speaker: And he's like, hey, we need to call for backup.
Speaker: And The Rock goes dramatically.
Speaker: We are the backup.
Speaker: Like, no, you're not.
Speaker: You're not.
Speaker: You're not.
Speaker: And Portman, despite being creepy, was right.
Speaker: He's like, protocol dictates that we actually need to call for backup.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: You're the first soldiers to get there.
Speaker: You are by definition, not the backup.
Speaker: Don't make me agree with this guy ever again.
Speaker: um so like um portman and destroyer um who is the the big large man who carries a minigun uh-huh uh are paired together and portman runs off because he has to take a shit and um quote unquote take a shit but he's actually calling for backup well while it's that's happening and the um
Speaker: A destroyer ends up fighting a one of the mutated things looks like a I mean, if anything in this game was going to be like a hell night or a baron of hell or something like that, it would be this thing that he's the closest thing we got to it.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And he does pretty good against it, all things considered.
Speaker: Yeah, not half bad.
Speaker: Not half bad.
Speaker: He actually gets a pretty, his death is pretty lame, to be honest.
Speaker: Yeah, it looks like he's going to win.
Speaker: And he's going to win.
Speaker: He gets away.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: He starts climbing up the chain.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And it pulls on the chain and just breaks the chain and he just falls to his death.
Speaker: Well, I think, yeah, it's something like that, because I remember because I called it Chekhov's electrified prison cell because it is like they first show up and it's the cell.
Speaker: And he goes, oh, yeah, this is a holding cell.
Speaker: You can tell because of all the electricity.
Speaker: And I'm like, oh, the electricity period that's coming back.
Speaker: And that's where they fight.
Speaker: And so, yeah, he feels like he's got him because he's the monsters like I think that had something to do with.
Speaker: I think when he grabbed him, he like.
Speaker: continued the circuit through destroyer and just got, it was, it was very unclear though.
Speaker: It's, it's, it, it's from this era of movies where like, they were like, if we make this as dark as possible, maybe people won't see enough to criticize a lot of what's happening.
Speaker: So yeah, but yeah, it's, it's pretty lame.
Speaker: It's pretty lame for a guy who nearly wins a fist fight with a. Yeah.
Speaker: With a doom enemy.
Speaker: With a doom mutant.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's pretty lame.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Destroyer.
Speaker: So Destroyer's dead.
Speaker: Portman sends out his message, but then he also gets killed.
Speaker: Everyone seems kind of okay with it.
Speaker: Everyone's fine with it.
Speaker: I will give them credit.
Speaker: Pinky in particular.
Speaker: I remember he sees the footage of the guy dying, go, Oh, like it's because what happens is like, he's under, he's in under duress and somebody calls him and he goes, pinky, you got eyes on Portman and pinky is looking right at Portman, like being attacked.
Speaker: And he's like, Nope.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So they hear him Portman screaming.
Speaker: They track him down.
Speaker: The Rock, who previously had acquired the BFG, shoots the BFG, but it's too late.
Speaker: Portman is dead and the BFG leaves a giant hole in the wall.
Speaker: Yes, it is.
Speaker: And we actually do get to hear Rock...
Speaker: Uttering the words big fucking gun.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: When he gets it.
Speaker: And we do get one of our Easter eggs there.
Speaker: It plays some doom music underneath the reveal of the BFG, which I didn't even notice.
Speaker: Yeah, it's from the original.
Speaker: Is it E1M1?
Speaker: I forget.
Speaker: I have no idea.
Speaker: I just, I just recognized the tune.
Speaker: Um, but I mean, the music's honestly one of the only things in this movie that they get right.
Speaker: Uh, it, it does, it does have a nice hard rock feel to it.
Speaker: Sure.
Speaker: Uh, throughout.
Speaker: Although the problem is, is that nothing happens.
Speaker: So you'll get like the, and then they'll turn a corner and go, Oh,
Speaker: It was a monkey, not a demon.
Speaker: And then it's just.
Speaker: I'm still here, man.
Speaker: It's just like a guitar player is just like hiding in the corner.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: With a little amp on his belt.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I know you're back there.
Speaker: somebody BFG Steve Vai and then Joe Satriani comes down from the ceiling.
Speaker: God, they're everywhere!
Speaker: Blue Kirk Hammett in half!
Speaker: Oh my God, is that Ingway Malmsteen?
Speaker: Not anymore.
Speaker: Not anymore.
Speaker: More like Ingway Meltstein.
Speaker: And then we do the triangle pose.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Shugum.
Speaker: Roll credits.
Speaker: Better movie.
Speaker: Automatically a better movie.
Speaker: Automatically a better movie.
Speaker: You can't tell us we're wrong.
Speaker: Stalked by the, uh, by former G3 guitarists.
Speaker: Um, so yeah, uh,
Speaker: Portman dies, destroyer dies, who's left.
Speaker: Uh, pretty much everyone is still a lot else is still alive.
Speaker: I think at this point, most aside from goat, um, they're like, they, the rock starts having his kind of like heel turn at this point.
Speaker: He's, he's going from the people's champ to the, the, the corporate champ.
Speaker: Um,
Speaker: I thought it was a weird choice for him to call Carl Urban a jabroni, but the director seemed to know what he was doing.
Speaker: He called Carl Urban a Rudy Poo candy ass.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: It was weird.
Speaker: It was weird.
Speaker: I'm not going to lie.
Speaker: It took me out.
Speaker: It took me out of the, uh, the careful world building that they'd been doing up until that moment.
Speaker: It was so careful up until that point.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: They just kind of slipped.
Speaker: They let the mask drop.
Speaker: It just blew it up.
Speaker: Um, so he makes Sam get download all the data on the mutant stuff and how to make them and whatnot because it's UAC property and that's what they're there to, to, to get.
Speaker: So, and John is like, you're just going to leave her here alone?
Speaker: And he's like, she's a big girl.
Speaker: And then like, all right.
Speaker: So they're...
Speaker: They're tracking things down.
Speaker: Shit's happening.
Speaker: Yada, yada, yada.
Speaker: Eventually, everybody gets out.
Speaker: Everybody who was in the base has already left.
Speaker: And they've come to the decision that everybody who has left could possibly have been infected.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: So, and then Reaper is talking to his girlfriend.
Speaker: His sister.
Speaker: His sister.
Speaker: I mean, they did set that up for... Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: He's talking to his sister.
Speaker: One of the things we find out,
Speaker: by the way, is that their parents, that their twins forgot to mention, but their parents used to work at Old Divai, that facility, and they died somehow.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And we know this because Carl Urban has a brief moment where he's staring out into the landscape of Mars and basically having his own quiet little family Vietnam flashback.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Yeah, he really Cormac McCarthy's out into... All over that bitch.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: Out into the landscape.
Speaker: Oh, absolutely.
Speaker: So, yeah, we learn that, that his parents have died.
Speaker: Eventually, he goes back to Sam, and Sam's like, listen, I figured it out.
Speaker: The people might not be actually... Not all of them might be infected with the evil...
Speaker: uh, yes, because it, it depends.
Speaker: It's all about what's in your heart.
Speaker: It's about what's in your heart.
Speaker: If you're a bad person, it tries to infect you.
Speaker: If you're a good person, it just tries to kill you.
Speaker: But if you were a good person who got infected, you would turn superhuman and instead of, uh, evil.
Speaker: Um, so the odds are pretty good then it's pretty good.
Speaker: Not so bad.
Speaker: It's not so bad, but the rock says, let's go and kill ourselves.
Speaker: Some civilians.
Speaker: Let's go kill some civilians.
Speaker: So they all go back to Earth.
Speaker: And the rock is basically on a on the path to just committing some war crimes here.
Speaker: Oh, he literally says the phrase, kill them all and let God sort them out, which is everybody is.
Speaker: Most people are dead, though.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: When they get back.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: We find out, though, that, you know, yeah, the rock is just killing some folks.
Speaker: He's just he's just indiscriminately.
Speaker: They're like, no, it's it's it's not going to happen.
Speaker: You got to stop.
Speaker: They might be fine.
Speaker: And he's like, let God sort him out.
Speaker: Yep.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: But the rookie won't do it.
Speaker: The rookie is going to move.
Speaker: The rookie finds a room of like 20 people who are perfectly fine.
Speaker: He's like, I'm not going to do it.
Speaker: And the rock shoots him in the throat.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Which...
Speaker: Doesn't seem like a cool guy move to do.
Speaker: Not, not, not, uh, yeah, not on my list of cool, cool guy things to do.
Speaker: I mean, you could have shot him in the head.
Speaker: That would have been better.
Speaker: That would have been, that would have been a nicer thing to do.
Speaker: You could have done like the standard triple tap, which is, which would have been two in the, two in the heart, one in the head.
Speaker: Or, or.
Speaker: Not kill them all.
Speaker: Not killed them.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: That could have, that would have, that was an option.
Speaker: That's always on the table.
Speaker: It's always on the table.
Speaker: Always on the table.
Speaker: Chooses none of those and shoots them in the throat so that he lives out his final moments in extreme agony as he bleeds out through his throat.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Because he's realizing, oh God, I'm in a, I'm in the doom movie.
Speaker: And then he does.
Speaker: I'm in the doom movie and he wanted to be out.
Speaker: So.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Um, everybody ends up getting split up at this point.
Speaker: Um, because there's like a monster that like, basically he gets shot because pinky is, uh, pinky is like, Hey, everybody drop your guns.
Speaker: Uh, because Carl Urban is about to shoot the rock over shooting the kid.
Speaker: And then a monster like steals pinky away.
Speaker: Just, um,
Speaker: Again, he's our Paul Reiser.
Speaker: He's kind of the... He's our Paul Reiser.
Speaker: He is.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So they all get separated.
Speaker: The Rock is off on somewhere else.
Speaker: So it's just Duke, Sam, and Reaper.
Speaker: They're fighting off a horde of infected and they're trying to close a nano wall.
Speaker: The Rock gets pulled through the nano wall and saying, I'm not supposed to die.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Duke gets pulled through the grading and like just absolutely eviscerated by the grading.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And Reaper, Carl Urban's character, shoots the nanowall just as it's going solid.
Speaker: And the bullet ricochets off and hits him in...
Speaker: I'm never really clear.
Speaker: Not sure where it hit him, but hit him enough where he's losing a lot of blood.
Speaker: Probably a femoral artery in his leg or something like that.
Speaker: Yeah, something like that.
Speaker: He's not doing so good.
Speaker: That's the part.
Speaker: Not doing so good.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Basically, Sam, then she took the last vial of the chromosome 24, and she's like, all right, well, I got to inject this into you to save you.
Speaker: And he's like, no, I've done bad things.
Speaker: And she's like, I know your heart.
Speaker: I know you.
Speaker: I grew up with you.
Speaker: Boy, what a bad assumption to go under.
Speaker: I grew up with a lot of people who, who there's with it's they're, they're different now.
Speaker: They're different now.
Speaker: It's not the same.
Speaker: It's not the same.
Speaker: So they, uh,
Speaker: So she injects him.
Speaker: He falls asleep.
Speaker: He wakes up.
Speaker: He's totally healed.
Speaker: She's gone, though.
Speaker: He goes to look for her.
Speaker: He finds her.
Speaker: She's knocked out cold.
Speaker: And here comes the rock.
Speaker: And she's like, he's like, have you been clearing sectors or something like that?
Speaker: And she's like, what about that room with all the people?
Speaker: And the rock and the rock is like, I took care of it.
Speaker: And then they have their big boss battle fight.
Speaker: They're shooting each other.
Speaker: Sam gets to cover.
Speaker: They end up fist fighting a lot.
Speaker: Boom, boom, boom.
Speaker: The Rock does not do the people's elbow at all.
Speaker: Total disappointment.
Speaker: If you're going to have The Rock in your movie and you're going to end the movie with a big old wrestling match, just let him do his... Just throw in a few Easter eggs.
Speaker: What, do you think you're going to make the movie worse?
Speaker: It's...
Speaker: You can't do that.
Speaker: It's just, just fucking let them let's let, let's have a little fun.
Speaker: Why don't we?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So the rock is mutating into a demon because he's been bitten.
Speaker: Um, Oh fuck.
Speaker: I forgot the best part of this movie.
Speaker: Oh yeah.
Speaker: The first person shooter sequence.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Carl, Carl urban gets, uh, what was that movie that was, that was done entirely that way.
Speaker: Um, it made a big splash when it came out a while back.
Speaker: Um, Oh fuck.
Speaker: Um, I have to, I have, this is going to drive me.
Speaker: What is that movie?
Speaker: It had a funny name.
Speaker: Hardcore Henry?
Speaker: Yes, that's the one.
Speaker: That's the one.
Speaker: Hardcore Henry.
Speaker: And I'll tell you what, this is the best sequence in the movie.
Speaker: It is unironically very cool, and it is nothing like the rest of the movie.
Speaker: It's very it's it's pretty neat.
Speaker: It's not like the rest of the movie.
Speaker: It's also not like Doom.
Speaker: It's actually more like House of the Dead.
Speaker: A little bit.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: A little bit.
Speaker: Because there's a lot of there's a lot of like it's like it just feels like it feels like you're watching a House of the Dead because House of the Dead is on like an on the rail shooter.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And it's like, oh, you turn around and there's a guy right in your face.
Speaker: They do that.
Speaker: They do the arcade shooter thing where they're like,
Speaker: not on the screen.
Speaker: And I think like right in front of you.
Speaker: Oh shit.
Speaker: And you shoot off screen to reload.
Speaker: So it's less of a doom segment and a first person segment.
Speaker: Well, it is first person, but it's, it's more of a house of the dead.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Totally.
Speaker: Area, Area 51.
Speaker: You remember that one, right?
Speaker: You ever play that one?
Speaker: Sure.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's on the rails arcade shooter.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Way more of that.
Speaker: But yeah, it's, it's actually pretty cool.
Speaker: It's, it's done.
Speaker: We get our, we get our chainsaw.
Speaker: We get a chainsaw.
Speaker: I don't, that just comes out of fucking nowhere, but whatever.
Speaker: I was like, why do, why are there axes and chainsaws in a research facility?
Speaker: It's funny because at that point you figure you've almost got it.
Speaker: You guys have almost figured it out.
Speaker: This is silly.
Speaker: This is silly.
Speaker: And you're throwing it in because you'd need to.
Speaker: And you recognize that.
Speaker: So why not just go ham on that?
Speaker: Why not just go fully over the cliff of silly campy shit?
Speaker: I bet you would have made a way better movie, a way better movie.
Speaker: Yeah, I think this is before Hollywood learns that you just had to lean into the inherent silliness of something rather than just like trying to fix it.
Speaker: Yeah, exactly.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And make it serious.
Speaker: Make it cool and serious and good.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: You're absolutely right.
Speaker: He also fights ends up after this.
Speaker: He ends up fighting Pinky, who has turned into a literal Pinky demon.
Speaker: Pinky demon.
Speaker: Yep.
Speaker: That's our that's our first and only demon in the film.
Speaker: Yep.
Speaker: Although I guess technically based on the lore of this movie, it's not a demon.
Speaker: It's just a mutant.
Speaker: Just another mutant.
Speaker: And then we get to the whole fist fight with the rock.
Speaker: He doesn't do it with people's elbow.
Speaker: He activates, Carl Urban activates the Ark.
Speaker: He teleports the rock back to Mars.
Speaker: And then he throws a grenade.
Speaker: They keep talking about these ST grenades and how dangerous they are throughout the entire goddamn movie.
Speaker: And then he throws one of those ST grenades through the Ark portal.
Speaker: And it goes on the other side and blows up the old device, killing the rock ostensibly.
Speaker: And Carl Urban and Samantha are our final girls.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And he takes the elevator up, holding her.
Speaker: He blows.
Speaker: I literally have in my notes I wrote.
Speaker: Oh, the end.
Speaker: It really cuts hard to the end.
Speaker: It really does, which is fine at that point.
Speaker: You're like, we got it.
Speaker: We don't need a, we don't need an epilogue.
Speaker: It's fine.
Speaker: Just, just fucking, we're good.
Speaker: Just, just knock us out here.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Doom.
Speaker: So final thoughts on the movie.
Speaker: I thought it was really, really boring.
Speaker: There are long stretch.
Speaker: It sounds like there's stuff happening.
Speaker: I mean, and stuff does happen.
Speaker: It's just in between.
Speaker: There's long stretches of just dudes walking around hallways and there is no real tension.
Speaker: None, none because they keep releasing it.
Speaker: Anytime they start to build up to it would be like they would they would like lead you to believe something was going to happen and then it would be a fake out.
Speaker: They did so many fake outs.
Speaker: So any tension you could have built up gets the pressure gets blown off immediately.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Immediately.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So, yeah, those are my thoughts on the movie.
Speaker: I feel like we could have a better Doom movie now.
Speaker: Probably.
Speaker: We've got a way better Doom video game.
Speaker: We got, yeah, exactly.
Speaker: Doom leaned into what they do best and what they're all about and had fun with it.
Speaker: You know?
Speaker: I bet we could do something like that.
Speaker: That would be very doable.
Speaker: It'd be great.
Speaker: You know, just two hours of ripping and tearing.
Speaker: Actually, 90 minutes of ripping and tearing.
Speaker: I was going to say 90 minutes.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: What are your thoughts?
Speaker: 75.
Speaker: With credit.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It was an awful movie.
Speaker: It wasn't honestly, as I, as I mentioned to you before, not as bad as I expected it to be because there were a few moments where I was like, okay, that's pretty cool.
Speaker: The FPS sequence, the music was pretty doom.
Speaker: It was pretty well done in that sense.
Speaker: Um, I thought, I thought there was a big misstep.
Speaker: Cause I really did think our main character was going to be the rock.
Speaker: Um, you know, Semper Fi is my love language, uh, Dwayne, the rock Johnson.
Speaker: Uh, I thought.
Speaker: Yeah, but he just, he had nothing going on.
Speaker: And so when he takes the heel turn, you're like, why that's like really silly.
Speaker: Uh, it just, it, none of it made a lot of sense.
Speaker: It wasn't very good.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: No, there's no motivation for his heel turn.
Speaker: None.
Speaker: None.
Speaker: It doesn't make any sense.
Speaker: The first time I saw the movie, I didn't even notice that he had been bitten.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I was like, is he just mutating out of nowhere?
Speaker: And then this time watching it.
Speaker: He goes by so quick, you could miss it.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: There's just like a brief, you could see on his neck that he's been hit with the viral stuff.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So that's Doom.
Speaker: Doom.
Speaker: The movie.
Speaker: Anyway.
Speaker: Anyway.
Speaker: What are you playing?
Speaker: Ah, okay.
Speaker: Well, I finished up the Separate Ways DLC for Resident Evil 4.
Speaker: Wow, there's a lot.
Speaker: They really jam-packed that one.
Speaker: It's $10, and it was almost six hours.
Speaker: Yeah, from what I understand, a lot of the boss fights that were cut from the original game were added into Separate Ways.
Speaker: Okay, okay.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So like the U3 boss fight in the original Resident Evil 4 wasn't in the remake, but it is in separate ways.
Speaker: I forget.
Speaker: You'd think I'd remember because I pretty recently played the original RE4, but I don't remember.
Speaker: But I was impressed.
Speaker: It was like five and a half hours of Resident Evil light.
Speaker: The puzzles weren't as hardcore.
Speaker: The bosses weren't as hardcore.
Speaker: Sure.
Speaker: It was a really fun way to spend 10 bucks.
Speaker: It was terrific.
Speaker: And the voice actress who does Ada Wong is amazing.
Speaker: And she calls Leon at one point a good boy.
Speaker: And I got an erection.
Speaker: And it was everything you could want.
Speaker: in a Resident Evil 4 DLC.
Speaker: It was pretty great.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I also, I literally just finished Vampire Survivors came out with a new update with five new achievements and I went ahead and took care of those.
Speaker: They've got a new level called Whiteout and a couple of new weapons, I believe.
Speaker: And it's just more the good shit.
Speaker: I remain on my 100% achievement score for them.
Speaker: Nice.
Speaker: I played a little bit of Warp Forge, which is the new 4hammer 40k collectible card game.
Speaker: Nice.
Speaker: It's fine.
Speaker: It's fine.
Speaker: It does the thing...
Speaker: where I was really kind of psyched when I got into it because there are all kinds of decks you can play.
Speaker: And you can do Space Marines, Chaos, Tyranids, Orcs, Necrons.
Speaker: There's a lot of options, and that's very, very cool.
Speaker: And it's a simple enough game, but at the same time, you do feel kind of paralyzed by choice.
Speaker: uh, early on.
Speaker: It's not as simple of a game as say Marvel snap.
Speaker: Sure.
Speaker: Um, so I, I'm going to go back and try it again.
Speaker: Cause it seems, it seems interesting.
Speaker: It's free to play.
Speaker: Um, but, uh, I don't, I don't know.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: I think it's, it's fine.
Speaker: Um,
Speaker: And I've also been playing the challenge mode of 100 Days, which is that winemaking simulator.
Speaker: Oh, okay.
Speaker: Slowly, like, picking off the challenge modes.
Speaker: It's a very relaxing game.
Speaker: It's a good game to literally sit there with a bottle of wine and your podcasts and stuff.
Speaker: And it's pretty outstanding for that.
Speaker: Wine, podcasts, making wine.
Speaker: Yeah, it's great.
Speaker: It's great.
Speaker: And it even has a very relaxing soundtrack.
Speaker: And yeah, so a little bit of everything here.
Speaker: So yeah, what about you, Kevin?
Speaker: What have you been playing?
Speaker: Unfortunately, not much other than Marvel Snap.
Speaker: Yeah, I probably next week I'll be getting back into my regularly scheduled program of playing some actual god dang computer games.
Speaker: Once I'm finished working on some one gig that I have.
Speaker: But yeah, still Marvel snapping, baby.
Speaker: Have you gotten the Black Knight yet?
Speaker: No, I haven't.
Speaker: I got to a, uh, whatever, the chest, the purple chest.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And I was like, I was like, all right, this is going to get the, and I clicked it and I didn't get them.
Speaker: I almost never get the one that I'm going for.
Speaker: The last one had an X-23.
Speaker: That was the only one I wanted in the whole batch and didn't get her.
Speaker: I never get the one.
Speaker: I take that back.
Speaker: I did get the Lady Deathstrike that I wanted.
Speaker: Lady Deathstrike has been a... I...
Speaker: I've seen her a few times.
Speaker: She's a cool card, man.
Speaker: I like her.
Speaker: She's a cool card.
Speaker: She totally wrecked my plants because I had, you know, I had Elsa out on a lane for my supercharging of the fourth card that I dropped, right?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And...
Speaker: the opponent dropped a Lady Deathstrike in their, it's like their destroy deck or whatever.
Speaker: And the Lady Deathstrike killed literally everything, like my entire lane of cards.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Because the way Elsa, the way Elsa works is like I had,
Speaker: I kind of play like a garbage lane with like things I need.
Speaker: So like I'll drop Elsa, I'll drop forge in that lane to charge something.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker: And they play Lady Deathstrike and be like, oh, well, I'm just going to retreat.
Speaker: Yeah, that's it.
Speaker: Shit.
Speaker: Yeah, between you got your Lady Death Strikes, your Killmongers.
Speaker: I've been fucking up some people's plans lately, and it feels good.
Speaker: It feels real good.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It feels real good.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It feels real good.
Speaker: Real good.
Speaker: So that's it.
Speaker: That's it.
Speaker: That's it.
Speaker: And that's it for the episode.
Speaker: You know?
Speaker: I hope you all had an enjoyable listen to our recap of the Doom, the movie, the book, the game.
Speaker: Um...
Speaker: Is there an adaptation of the Doom movie as a book?
Speaker: Hang on.
Speaker: Novelization.
Speaker: God damn it.
Speaker: Is there?
Speaker: There totally is.
Speaker: Who wrote it?
Speaker: Ellen Dean Foster.
Speaker: John Shirley.
Speaker: John Shirley.
Speaker: John Shirley.
Speaker: Friend of the pod, John Shirley.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: One of our pals.
Speaker: All right, so we might have to look at that one.
Speaker: Just go full inception, just the snake eating its own tail.
Speaker: We're full Ouroboros on this bad boy.
Speaker: Oh, it's beautiful.
Speaker: Beautiful.
Speaker: We have to do that.
Speaker: All right, so if you want to follow us, just drop at PixletPod into Blue Sky or Instagram or Threads or X, formerly known as Twitter, and you'll find us.
Speaker: Yeah, we're around.
Speaker: Yeah, go to PixletPod.com and that'll take us to our Patreon where we have three tiers, three tiers in which you can give us your hard-earned dollars to make them our hard-earned dollars.
Speaker: And we really appreciate it.
Speaker: Each tier gets their own little benefits.
Speaker: And tier 10, the $10 tier, you get yourself shouted out on the show.
Speaker: So at this point, we're going to shout out
Speaker: The person who currently resides in that tier, and their name is Friendly Friends.
Speaker: You've been there for us, Friendly Friend, for weeks now, and we love you for it.
Speaker: We love you for it, Friendly Friend.
Speaker: We love you for it, Friendly Friend.
Speaker: Thank you so much.
Speaker: Thank you.
Speaker: But if you don't have any, if it's not in your plans right now to give money on Patreon, you can follow us for free on Patreon.
Speaker: So go to pixelipod.com.
Speaker: You'll get our Patreon page and you can just follow us for free.
Speaker: You'll get updates on episodes and things like that.
Speaker: So that will do it for tonight's episode.
Speaker: Thank you so much for listening and or watching, everybody.
Speaker: It's been a blast.
Speaker: Have a good night.
Speaker: Bye.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: We want to do, uh...
