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Lobbing Scorchers Bonus: The Most Watchable MLS Matches in Week 1 image

Lobbing Scorchers Bonus: The Most Watchable MLS Matches in Week 1

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Lobbing Scorchers is a production of Just Once Media.

Lobbing Scorchers is a Seattle Sounders and MLS focused show brought to you by Sounder at Heart. Hosted by Major League Soccer's Ari Liljenwall and Producer Noah Riffe. Join us as we lob our scorching takes on the American soccer landscape, Seattle Sounders, Major League Soccer, USMNT and more.

Contact: lobbingscorchers@justoncemedia.com

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Transcript

Lost Episode of Vlogging Scorchers

00:00:00
Speaker
After we know our best episode has never been seen. Wait, put the mic up. we we This is our cold open. Our best our best episode of Vlogging Scorchers has never been seen. And it was because of a tech related difficulty. Yeah. And then I almost had a mental breakdown. I think, yeah, no I think we both were the closest to um never doing a show ever again after that. And the worst part was definitely when it went to the void and then we had to put a show out. So we were like, we have to re-record what we just did. And the first recording was so good. And then the re-recording, it was like going to the dentist. It was so bad. And it was like one of our, it flopped too, like stats wise. mean, yeah, it was just, that was, that was one of, and I've never, i've I've never cooked like that before or since. Like, I don't know why I was just in your in flow state. I was in flow state that day that I've never been able to achieve. And that was the once, the one time I got it we went to the void. He was an absolute flow state and and that's the way that we do. But we're going to flow our state into this bonus episode. Thank you so much for being a paid member to the Lobbing Scorchers YouTube channel. We have committed ourselves to giving you this bonus content because we love you. We have new emotes on the way as well.
00:01:16
Speaker
They're coming. I promise. So if you have player. Oh, okay. I thought we might ah you might have decided that already. I haven't decided them yet. I'm here to crowdsource from you guys. Shall we let the YouTube members comment who you want them for? Yeah. We'll probably take that into account. We'll get it going, but let's get it going here.

CONCACAF Champions Cup History

00:01:38
Speaker
We are in the throes of the early days of CONCACAF Champions Cup. It is a tournament that is full of shithousery and these first moments. We have a team that is the Air Force team. We have a team that is... ah that is not really a team. Uh, they say that they're a team they're from Honduras, but, uh, from what I saw, they just picked up some dudes from the stands and tossed them in there to play against one of the greatest footballers of all time. And Denny Bawanga, um, and, uh, LAFC look like the greatest club alive and Nashville also kind of look like one of the greatest clubs alive. Ari, give us our CCC recaps for the week.
00:02:19
Speaker
Yeah, so Nashville and LAFC both absolutely destroyed their opposition. Nashville was playing Ottawa of the Canadian Prem. Which I saw this. This was a big scandal in Central American ah Twitter that I saw today. oh They're like, how the hell does a trash ass league like Canada that hasn't even been around 10 years.
00:02:41
Speaker
This is a lot of like the Central American Twitter discourse. ah They're saying, how does a trash ass league like the Canadian Premiership get two guaranteed spots in the goddamn CONCACAF Champions Cup, but Costa Rican teams don't even get one guaranteed and like all this stuff like that. So, ah Ottawa.
00:03:01
Speaker
are not beloved by the... Yeah, so like they destroyed opposition that were very overmatched, but it was still like just the way that both of them played. it First of all, it made me feel good about my picks of Nashville and LAFC for each having the

Criticism of LAFC's Offseason Moves

00:03:18
Speaker
best... the best some two of the best off-seasons of any clubs in the league, which there was a pundit who shall not be named...
00:03:28
Speaker
Name him. We're behind the paywall. Will Forbes. who Fucking idiot. Who said that LAFC had the worst offseason of any club in the league. And I was like, you know, that seems like it might be not.
00:03:39
Speaker
Have you watched the Ball? Correct. No. Because I had just written a column about how like they had one of the best. And one of the this was the only reason that I picked them. Their offseason was a little like the Sounders. They didn't really do all that much. But what they did do is they went out and got Steven Eustachio. I think that's how you say his name.
00:04:02
Speaker
But that was their big that was their big move, and I figured it was going to be a great move, and then I watched them play for them last night, and I was like, God damn it, this is not good that they have him.
00:04:15
Speaker
This is bad. I mean, this guy has been the centerpiece heartbeat focal point of the Canadian national team for the last like what four or five years now. yeah And he is so good. He's one of the reasons why they've become irrelevant. but They've gone from irrelevant and cock a calf to the easily in the best, like top two, definitely three teams in cock a calf. or like, you know, had an argument for the best in CONCACAF for a while there. They were running the show. And that guy is a big reason why. and now he's just on LAFC and watching how he was combining with the demonic duo of

LAFC vs Honduran Team Highlights

00:04:55
Speaker
Denny Buonga and Sun Hyung-min.
00:04:57
Speaker
It was scary, but ah but it did make me feel like, all right, that actually my my prediction on how that would work out is actually looking good so far, which that was refreshing for me because at this time last year, I was sitting here talking about how Atlanta United just had the greatest off season I've ever seen and that Miguel Almiron was the best move anyone made in the entire league over the off season.
00:05:21
Speaker
And that did not, that didn't age well. That was not a good take. So I've been trying to be a little more like lock in a little more on, on what I'm looking at for these preseason predictions. I was looking, i was really looking at who had the best off season. And I was like, LAFC didn't do a lot, but that move.
00:05:40
Speaker
Retaining talent and making a move to address a need and just being sometimes is the best thing to do. And it's also like it's it's another example of like, yeah, that's what the the good teams do. Eustachio is like that literally can't miss. No, no, that is no. You make that signing. That's a 100% hit rate. Like there's no chance he's going to spend like playing on their team. Like maybe there's some teams where stylistically he wouldn't fit. He's like exactly what they needed. So I just, we gotta go back to the, the fucking, uh, who is talking. Yeah, honestly, I'm down to just rip on him behind the paywall. I'm not interested in like a public beef with him, but I'm down to rip on him behind the paywall. He did bring up Lobbing Scorcher's name on his on his timeline, so I fear that we do have to bring up ah his trash-ass takes.
00:06:36
Speaker
ah brother, leave your basement, yada, yada so whatever. So he said Seattle had the second worst offseason in the entire league and that LAFC had the worst. And the LAFC rationale was that they didn't make any big signings and they're not ambitious. And also...
00:06:53
Speaker
He was doing i was so predictable. yeah He was saying, hiring Mark Dos Santos as your head coach? Are you kidding me? You're LAFC. You could go out and get anybody. How unambitious is this? And it's just like, Dude, you don't even watch the league. like does There's no way. There's no way he's sitting down on a Saturday, Sunday afternoon. Dude, if the Titans are on, that guy is not watching MLS. There's no way he possibly does because not only are his takes, like, bad, but, like, they're also just wrong. like they're wrong They're, like, factually wrong a lot of the time, too. I was telling you about the... I mean, he had a couple of ridiculous ones on... ah
00:07:34
Speaker
on the Sounders, but like at one point he was talking about how they moved off of Obed Vargas and Danny Leiva. And he said that they, he was like, they didn't do anything to address that. They didn't do anything to replace the position at that area of the field. And it's like, bro, like, how are you going to, how are you going to bring up that position group and just literally not even consider saying the names Hassani Dotson and Snyder Brunel? He doesn't know who Snyder Brunel is. Even to say that you think it's a bad plan.
00:08:01
Speaker
like Yeah, yeah you could say it's a bad plan. You could say, oh, you moved off of Obed Vargas and like your plan to replace him was Hassani Dotson, like an MLS lifer veteran who's not... That was their biggest off-season signing. I don't think he's as And then you know Snyder Brunel, maybe he's good, but you're really going to hedge on a young... He could have said some shit like that and it would have been a horrible take, but it at least would have reflected that he knew he like he had a baseline of what he was talking about.
00:08:27
Speaker
To not even mention their names, it proves that he literally does not know what he's talking about. Yeah, no, I completely agree. And dude, i this is this is just beef talk, which is so silly to beef with a guy who legitimately is not allowed outside of his mother's house. But like...
00:08:43
Speaker
he's He's like tweeting about us and then I like quote tweet it just as a joke because he's beefing with a Nico of all people. Nico who like was just tryinging trying to trying to be like helpful and you know he's like oh you go on LS too much and I think it's rotting your brain. First of all I know he's a listener because who calls it LS brother. That's our code. Use code LS for one free bottle of hot sauce with your order acts it ferments.
00:09:10
Speaker
That's all I got to say. But I quote tweeted it and I was just like rent free because I think that's funny. Got a lot of likes, ratioed, whatever. And then he commented and me like, well, it's actually rent free because you just unblocked me to post this. and like So he knew that. And I was like, it's even more rent free that you knew that i was but that you were blocked by me.
00:09:30
Speaker
and you so And then, like, brother, I don't like. Well, and then, i don't i mean, I saw the response after that. He said, I'm not interested in coming on your channel. i was like, brother, who the fuck? That was not an invite. Who was talking about that That's not an invite. You never had an invite. Like, I don't really know what to say there. That was not going to happen. Anyway, LAFC. I want to talk about that game because that was one of the funniest CONCACAF games I've ever

LAFC's Offensive Strength Showcased

00:10:01
Speaker
watched. Basically, what the situation you had was a team from Honduras that these these defenders were just simply not equipped to be dealing with the likes of Sun Hung Min and Denny Buonga. Basically, what we saw was a case study in what would happen is if you put just like kind of a bunch of random guys from Honduras out on a soccer field and you said, hey, try and stop full speed Sun Hyung-min and full speed Denny Buonga. And they could not do it. They conceded a penalty in the first minute of the game.
00:10:41
Speaker
literal first play of the game conceded a penalty. Correct. Absolutely bammed on 10 minutes later by David Martinez, who looked insane, ah then gave up another penalty 10 minutes after that three zero. And then this was my favorite part of the game. Their coach made a 20th minute rage sub. Like he was so pissed off about how the game was going that he said in the 20th minute, take that guy off. I'm putting that guy, this guy in, yeah which to me, it's like,
00:11:06
Speaker
If you have to make the 20th minute rage sub, then you may as well just not make it because it's not going to save you. Like you are chalked if you have to do the 20th minute rage sub, but he did. And then literally, i think two minutes after the 20th minute rage sub, they got bammed on again right before halftime. And then Bawanga again, for good measure in like the 70th minute for a six one.
00:11:32
Speaker
So it was just an all around bad news bears beat down of Real Espana from Honduras, but also even with their less than stellar opposition taken into account. I mean, LAFC, i mean, they looked like the freaking Harlem Globetrotters out there. They was yeah that was they were they were styling, they were doing like all these, Timothy Tillman scored a back heel goal. Yeah, that was it the most like disgusting. That whole sequence was just like, oh my God, that reminded me of those like juggernaut, like 2019 LAFC teams that, It was scary, dude. It was scary and it was disconcerting. And Son and Bawanga, I mean, they're not going to play Real Espana every week, but like that is also kind of what they were doing to MLS teams also last year. Yes. But all that's to say, man, like.
00:12:24
Speaker
Like, good. Like, give give Seattle ah as as lofty a test as you can give them. Fine. Like, that's the way it is. They've got a crazy stacked team, crazy stacked roster.
00:12:37
Speaker
Two of the best players, two of the top, like... three to four players in the league probably. So they're going to be a wagon and they looked like it in that game. the Nashville game, they were basically just beaten up on a Canadian prem side, but I think you did see kind of glimpses of like that. Did you see that one counter attack where Haney Mooktar like jukes the guy and then he sprayed it out to Espinoza. Yeah, that was Espinoza sent it in to stir. It was like, okay, well,
00:13:05
Speaker
That also, as a team that I picked as having one of the best off seasons in MLS, to see that working that well, even if it was against the Canadian Prem side, it's like, all right, all right.
00:13:16
Speaker
Two not bad takes looking so far.
00:13:23
Speaker
Agreed. great I literally I don't know what to say like that team is just scary and they they destroyed a team that should like I don't really know how they have official professional sanction frankly and but I think this was the most they were business men they were they were bitsmen and Mark Dos Santos ball is MDS MDS ball is it's it's it's good It's really good. I just want to say again, man, again, if that one ends up working out, we we were on that from the beginning because the narrative immediately started when they did that of like, oh, you're just hiring the assistant that you already had. Like what a terrible hire. And we both said, no, that is what a smart team does. Like don't overthink it. Don't do the Atlanta United. You go out and get these like guys like Gabrielle Heinze and Ronnie Dyla and never works.
00:14:15
Speaker
ah This is good opportunity for my favorite soapbox. Just hire Rob Valentino. And you probably would have been in a much better situation because he actually cared about that club. And the players were actually responded to what he was was selling. If you're LAFC and you already have a guy that you know that the players respond to and that, you know, understands your style of play and your roster and whatever you're about. Just hire that guy. It doesn't matter if he's not that big a name who had a rough go of it with the Whitecaps a few years ago. You don't need to like try and be a so be a rocket scientist about it. Just hire the guy that you already know is probably going to have success. It's a way better way to do it.
00:14:55
Speaker
I, we've soapboxed this, it's a perfect soapbox. Sorry, I like toned out, because I'm like, this is my, this is like, I agree. I love the Rob Valentino soapbox. No, it's it's it's the MLS classic. It's the same thing why, like, yeah, like, sure, I don't really care about ambition if you're hiring a coach who actually understands your players and your system and has been there and has like rapport in the locker room and like all of this stuff. Brian Schmetzer isn't some world-class coach That's just the truth.
00:15:29
Speaker
But the fact is, he's been around this team. He has the culture. He understands the Sounders, and that's what's made him so successful. If this was, you know, yeah if this was another MLS club, they probably wouldn't have given him a shake. If he was in Atlanta United, he would not have gotten a shake, probably which is crazy. yeah And he's now one of the most successful and longest tenured head coaches in all of MLS. Also, the idea that MDS was like this train wreck tire fire for the Whitecaps, that's not what happened. They gave him... they had the worst fucking roster of They gave him a horrendous roster. And if anything, he had them kind of punching above their weight, man. like And he didn't even have to Ramsey ball to do it. like he He was telling them to play...
00:16:10
Speaker
you know I think there was like little elements of Ramsey ball with them at times, but there was a lot of times where he was having that team like play real ball, play proactively. And they were pretty good for what they were, for what the players that they had. Like, I remember when they fired him being like, don't know, thought he was actually kind of doing pretty good. But like ah that was not like it was getting talked about as a situation where, like,
00:16:35
Speaker
ah he was I guess the implication is that he was given like a super good team and he underachieved with it. was literally the opposite. So yeah that's neither here nor there. I completely agree. um All right. Did we want, we're going to do some. I have one more before this. Oh, okay.
00:16:48
Speaker
ah Have you seen this rumor?

Rumors of Coutinho to LA Galaxy

00:16:51
Speaker
ah that the LA Galaxy are interested in 33-year-old Coutinho. I did see this. Who was recently playing at Vasco de Gama and just asked to be released from his contract for personal reasons, mental health reasons, all of this stuff, and now apparently is the target for the LA Galaxy. who want to replace Ricky Pooge for the time being and maybe potentially forever. I posted about this. I said, a 33-year-old wash guy filling the void left by the best young 10 in the league. Someone needs to arrest Will Kuntz. Said that as a joke. I had literally 30 Galaxy fans in my mentions calling me every slur in the book. Really? Yeah. Yeah.
00:17:30
Speaker
Let's go through this here. They've got, there was one that just posted a bunch of photos of Kamala Harris. Not really sure what's going on there. Um, Jesse says, okay, but after two ACL tears, it's going to be scary time. Uh, every time he goes down for an axi tackle, from my understanding, galaxy is out of DP slots. So if this is done ah on a TAM deal, it's actually a brilliant move. That was a, that was a reasonable response.
00:17:51
Speaker
That's just shot at Jesse, Jesse, Jesse's cooking there. Um, This is coming from a R worded Sounders fan who looks like a crackhead Benson Boone. Most of that comment was hilarious. I gotta honest, you know, it's not do the slur thing and then shut your bitch ass up and worry about the flounders.
00:18:10
Speaker
And then I was like, okay, I mean, sure. I mean, if that's what you guys really want. I didn't they were so defensive Will Koontz. I thought they hated him too. I, Yeah. And then, um, yeah. And then, and then I posted photo of his last three seasons at Vasco da Gama where he scored three goals had, or he had five, six, seven, eight goals and four assists.
00:18:33
Speaker
Uh, total in three seasons, uh, where only one of the seasons he played a full compliment of minutes where he played 30 matches, and started 30 matches. The others, he played three matches and 15 matches with only seven starts and three starts. So he's not really a reliable 33 year old either. is he a rotation player? i don't know what you're paying for him. He's a free agent, but, uh, yeah, everyone's getting really mad at me.
00:19:01
Speaker
about this. I don't really know what's going on here. ah Sounds like they took it like you were trashing on the on the galaxy when you're i mean you're talking about the yeah they they don't know about your vendetta against specifically the GM.
00:19:16
Speaker
Yeah, I like the... Well, I mean, i don't like the Galaxy. I don't care. I don't think we don't have any... We don't hate the Galaxy. It's not like It's not like

Debate Over Ricky Pooge vs Coutinho

00:19:24
Speaker
a special sort of feeling towards them. But do you really think that, like a 33-year-old who just asked for his contract to be canceled and has not done anything statistically productive in the Brazilian League, which is respectfully a step down from MLS, you really think that that's going to help patch you up in the meantime? Yeah, no, I mean, I say if teams want to keep doing stuff like this or like Minnesota just did with Hamas, I say just let them sign the 33 to 35-year-olds that even like, that's my thing with the Hamas thing. It's like eat what even in the best, absolute best ceiling possible outcome, like, what do you really think you're getting from 34-year-old Hamas? Yeah. I could regret that take that could backfire. But like if i if you just look at how he was doing in Liga Mackey's before this, it was fine. But like not I don't look at that. I'm like, oh, this guy's going to come to MLS and just tear it up and lay waste to the league like it's it's name chasing.
00:20:26
Speaker
Which is fine, but Coutinho is even more washed than Hamas, it sounds like. So ah if they if they want to do that, like I say have at it. Knock yourself out. like that is i That's not going to do anything.
00:20:39
Speaker
I don't know, man. And I really don't understand why every Galaxy fan is up in my DMs, like mentions freaking out. I was not even being a I was trying to protect your club. i also, I'm sorry, did you guys not hear the part where I called Ricky Pooj the best young 10 in the league? i I honestly think he's the best 10 the league, dude. They don't even know about the era when we were fans. They don't even know. They don't even know about the Joey Paints, Gabrielle Peck The reason we're upset about it is because we want the glory days back. We want the glory days back. Not the David Beckham, Landon Donovan, MLS Cup winning glory days. The triple P's. The dude. Talking about Joey Paints.
00:21:15
Speaker
Talking about Ricky Pooge. Talking about Gabrielle Peck. And Dayon Jovulic, God, that was the nastiest run forward this league has seen in years. Just absolutely phenomenal. Yeah. but ah Well, thank you for that ah entertaining. yeah I just think that's an interesting The beefs go behind the paywall. Yeah. we Not the biggest fans of Will Forbes. No.
00:21:37
Speaker
Not the biggest fans of Will. I don't hate Will Koontz as much as you do. but i Yeah, I'm not a fan of Will Koontz. I think he should be fired, but that's not... That's neither here nor there. All right, we are going to hit a brand new guinea pig segment here on the paywall.
00:21:53
Speaker
ah We have partnered with a Watchability. Watchability is a really cool new app that allows you to scan every single soccer match that's happening across the globe and find the ones that are the most entertaining, the most watchable. They take into consideration statistics, odds, and every narrative that is going on with these games to bring you a score that tells you, hey, this is a 90. You need to watch this game. It's going to be entertaining. I've been trying it out. It's made by one of our listeners. There's no money being exchanged. This is literally just a, I enjoy this product and we want to do some fun stuff together. So yeah, ah we are going to predict.
00:22:38
Speaker
We're going to face a bot. We're We will tell you what r top five most watchable games for MLS are this week, and we're gonna face off against the Watchability bot.
00:22:49
Speaker
Do you think that we can beat the Watchability bot, Ari? think so, yeah. I think we can beat the Watchability bot, honestly. i know how bots think. We know this game. We are pundits. We know this game inside and out. It's just a bot.
00:23:02
Speaker
It's just a bunch of numbers. We know. The bot doesn't know. So we are going to compete against the bot this week. We're going to give our top five best matchups, see what the bot says, and then next week we will check back in and see who's right. So let's jump into it. Ari, we determined our top five earlier today. Let's start with number five.
00:23:24
Speaker
Give us the reason why we are picking the San Jose Earthquakes versus Sporting Kansas City, a wooden spoon Supercopa. Yeah, so this was the dart throw pick. The rest of the picks, we were basing off what we actually think is the best and most watchable matchups. But then we threw in the trash one just to see if there's any any sort of... like Because for me, sometimes the more trash the matchup gets...
00:23:52
Speaker
it actually makes it more watchable in kind of like a schadenfreude, like morbid fascination kind of way. Yeah. So this pick represents

Partnership with 'Watchability' App

00:24:01
Speaker
that. Like it's it's going to be watchable because it's going to be really bad. You got the Quakes...
00:24:07
Speaker
who, yes, they got Timo Werner, maybe he's good. They also lost every other good player that they have. They look like kind of a mess. And then you've got a sporting club of professional wrestling enthusiasts team that could be like historically bad. like Maybe maybe the raffle wiki is going to get them scrapping to like one point one points per game or something like that. But I would be shocked if they even manage that. Like I was going through their roster and having no idea who anybody was. So it's two bad teams and that's going to make it even more watchable.
00:24:42
Speaker
I'm excited to see how many or how few goals are scored. I think this could be high, it could be one of those like high scoring games. yeah And I think that's what makes soccer exciting. It's they're not going to score. Like it could be like five to four with the worst defending you've ever seen. Correct. And ah it's an all blue matchup, all in blue hell. We will move on to our number four pick. This one, we're actually both intrigued by these two teams. They made a lot of offseason signings, and I think they might shock the league this year. Number four is Houston versus Chicago.
00:25:14
Speaker
I am a triple G believer. I believe in Greg. I believe in the Chicago fire. I believed in them in the playoffs last year, and I am continuing that belief into this season. Ari, tell us a little bit more about why you like this matchup.
00:25:28
Speaker
Well, Chicago, they had they took a leap where I guess it wasn't really a leap because it was Berhalter's first year, but he had them improved a lot. And that was because they had a they out of a pretty electric offense. Zinker Noggle was an all-star. Pumpernickel. Yeah, Pumpernickel. He had like 15 and 15 last year. he is a pretty awesome player. They got Jonathan Bamba. They got Hugo Kuypers. They made a few signings over the offseason. They signed a couple of South African U-22s, one of whom is a highly rated center back. So basically, they theoretically strengthened a team that scored like 68 goals last year or something. Like, they could score with anybody last year. They just...
00:26:11
Speaker
and They conceded a lot. They also conceded like 60 some odd goals. Which makes them fun to watch. Exactly. Exactly. Like that is that they were one of the most watchable teams last year for that exact reason. They would do the bit. They did they had a bit and they would stick to it. And all their, all their games were exciting and they scored a ton of goals. And then you got a Houston team that they sneakily, they had the splashiest off season. I think probably of anybody, man, like they went out and, and some That's not always a good thing. When you're the team that has to do that, that means you had a lot of problems that needed fixing. okay so that That's not necessarily because they're like super ambitious. It's because they screwed up their team last year and were spending a shit ton of money to try and fix it this year. But they did do some intriguing stuff to do that, namely signing Matias or yeah getting Matias Bogus from Cruz Azul. We remember yeah how demonic he was on l LAFC when they used to play the Sounders.
00:27:13
Speaker
that's That's at least a player that is you know young, in his prime, and a proven MLS track record. So I think there's a lot to like there. And then this guy, Guilherme, I think is how it's pronounced, this Brazilian DP that they signed. is apparently hella good. that He's very highly rated. The pundits seem to think he's going to be really good in MLS.
00:27:34
Speaker
So you start there, and they should be improved offensively. And then you throw in the better personnel with the fact that when they had a better roster a couple years ago, Benny O had them playing, like, really aesthetically yeah pleasing soccer. Like, remember, they were doing those crate they were scoring these crazy team goals where they would just be pew, pew,
00:27:55
Speaker
pinging it around. And then all of a sudden the guy has a wide open net. Like they were not that good a team, but some of these individual goals that they would score were some of the best like team MLS goals that you'll ever see, man. Like they were, there was, they had some of that stuff going on. So I think that if you combine that, ah that better attacking personnel with the Benny O 2024, the, that Benny ball,
00:28:22
Speaker
they They could be at least a really fun team offensively to watch this year. And they also signed a ah a defender, Halter, I think from Botafogo, who could be good too.
00:28:34
Speaker
So i'm ah i'm I'm kind of high on the on the dynamo and having a better year this year than they usually do. I am excited to watch that one. Number three. this one might This one might be offensive to our Seattle Sounders listeners because it's two clubs that they do not enjoy. The Portland Timbers facing off against the Columbus Cubs. crew the Columbus crew famously did not have the best season last year and then they lost their oh captain my captain off to the Scottish Premiership where he was subsequently named the worst manager in Celtic history and then kicked to the absolute curb and chased out of Scotland facing off against a Portland Timbers team that did
00:29:22
Speaker
they're not Nothing. They did nothing last season. but And didn't really do all that much over the offseason. but Correct. But my logic here is you got two teams that, no matter how good or bad they are, are always built around high-octane counterattacking tactics. I think the crew, they were really well-known for that when Nancy was their coach. And I think ah this new guy is going to try to maintain that. I think they really like think of that as their identity of, like, we're just going to be this...
00:29:52
Speaker
kind of buzzsaw counterattacking, aesthetically pleasing. Like that's what they were known for under Nancy. So I think he's going to try and retain that. They're going to play similarly to how the Crab played over the last couple of years. And then the Timbs, that's, they always are just kind of a counterattacking team that,
00:30:12
Speaker
They can always score goals. like they're not They're not good at preventing them, and that's why they don't win anything, but like they're going to be able to score. So ah that's that's what I was thinking with this one. I dig it. Number two for us.
00:30:28
Speaker
The Los Angeles Galaxy versus New York City FC. New York City FC was a sleeper pick for you in the playoffs last year. The l LA Galaxy were the wooden spoon contenders until the end of the season where they somehow turn it around under the the the watch of Marco Reus. No more Ricky Pooge. He is unfortunately injured again. And New York City FC lost a pretty good defender to the LA Galaxy. So that will be the return for him. Ari, what are you seeing in our number two matchup?
00:31:04
Speaker
I just feel like the bot ah is going to like LA NYC. Yeah. It's a, yeah, it's a narrative match. that's It's a narrative match. And then also people are like really high on the galaxy. like I don't, I don't understand that. It's kind of of like, like I get that last year was like absolutely everything went wrong. That could have gone wrong.
00:31:30
Speaker
And I also get that they replaced their two really bad center backs with two that are theoretically really good. better i'm just I'm just a little wary of any time there's there's like a very obvious roster need like that.
00:31:44
Speaker
And then a team is like, I'm going to throw a bunch of resources at one or two players. And then everyone's like, oh, see, hole plugged, problem solved. yep It very rarely actually works out like that. Going out and getting Jacob Glessis and Justin Hack, good, smart moves. Is it going to solve all their problems and make their defense good, like everyone seems to be saying? What happens if one of those guys gets hurt?
00:32:07
Speaker
That's true. Like, that's what you have to think about. Like, Jacob Glessness, like, if he has to miss a week or two, they could be chalked. What if what what if Justin Hack, he he moved from midfield to center back last year and looked awesome, going to a new team, moving across the country.
00:32:23
Speaker
Like, what if it doesn't translate? What if it turns out that instead of a really good high-level center back for them, he's, like, not horrible like Zonka, but, like, below average. They could still have a tough time defending. It just getting lessness in heck does not guarantee all a sudden that they're going to be good at defense, especially because there's more to being good at defense than just the center backs. Like their their midfield is not especially good. Like their defensive midfielders, I don't think are especially good. So I'm just i'm just not quite as sold that
00:32:56
Speaker
Like, I don't know. It seems like the mass consensus, their betting odds for MLS Cup are better than Seattle. Like, literally, the odds makers think that they're the sixth most likely team in the entire league to win MLS Cup. i'm looking at that like, really?
00:33:10
Speaker
Am I, like, high out of my mind? Maybe. They, uh... They lost Ricky Pooj again. They lost, yeah. it like it So the whole thing's built around. Failed ACL surgery. Marco Reus. So anyway, that was a tangent. But like the ah the Galaxy are a popular pundit pick to be good this year. And NYCFC, it's New York City. So I think like it's just a sexy matchup that the bot is probablyable It's a sexy matchup, but I could also see it being a high scoring matchup, something that is interesting, at least in the sense of footy. ah
00:33:46
Speaker
I think the Galaxy are losing that game. I think. Yeah, it just sucks that and NYC don't have Alonzo Martinez. know. they're always like somehow in the mix. They're like kind of under the radar. One of the better run clubs, I think, because even some years I look at the roster and I'm like, that's not that good. And then it's like, they're like no we yeah like, we're easily a playoff team. yeah Is that partially because we play in the New York Yankees outfield and no one else is used to playing in those dimensions? Yeah. But we also have a pretty good team. Yeah. I think that's going to be the highest ah bust rate of all of these though. That match has the biggest chance I think of it could be horrible. A terrible match. yeah Number one, the highlight, even MLS is highlighting this one, so you know it had to be our number one. The Los Angeles Football Club, Son Hunman, Denny Bawanga, all of the other guys that they have that are good.

Anticipation for LAFC vs Inter Miami Match

00:34:37
Speaker
Hugo Lloris versus Inter Miami, Lionel Messi, the Barca boys, and every dude who's super tan in Miami wearing pink.
00:34:50
Speaker
Number one. I mean, it's it's kind of self-explanatory, but like, I mean, it's the, so it's the juggernaut for the predictions show. Originally, I was going to have us predict, uh, like supporters shield and like league MVP. And I was just like, it's predicting the supporter shield is pointless. Like anyone who predicts anyone other than one of these two teams is making a bad pick. Like yeah that there's no other possible picks that you could make for that. And then similarly with MVP, it's probably gonna be Messi again because his ability ah to put up the stat sheet numbers that he puts up is just something that like literally no other player in the world can do. So he's gonna put up so crooked, super crooked stats again and probably just get MVP. But then even if through some confluence of events he doesn't, then it's for sure gonna be Bwonga or Sun.
00:35:42
Speaker
So like, there's no point in guessing that either. But all that's to say is like, these are two of the most stacked rosters in MLS history. And I'm glad they're playing each other off rip because i want to see like, all right, like which one of you is actually the one who, ah who's going to be dominating this year. You know, like they probably both are, but whoever, if someone comes out and wins this game convincingly, I think that's going to be like, like if inner Miami go out and slam on LAFC, like three to one or something,
00:36:16
Speaker
Uh, like that's just going to be probably an indicator of what type of year it's going to be. But anyway, like I, there, there's no way any other game is going to get number one other than this. I completely agree with you. It is a marquee matchup.
00:36:30
Speaker
I, I don't know what's what to make of it, but I think it is a defining like season setting game for both of these clubs. And whoever wins is going to be like feeling, they're going to feed that that's like that's like and whoever loses that's your get back like you want that that's honestly the perfect week one matchup yeah i'm glad they did it like that yeah like it's the best in the west versus the best and it like it it doesn't i don't think the result actually matters all that much like for the loser in the sense that both these both of these teams are going to be insane this year ah but i also to what you were mentioning on the original show like
00:37:10
Speaker
I don't think Seattle like can't beat them. No. like There's going to be a lot of talk about how big the gap is and how the Sounders need to close that gap by showing more ambition and stuff. But like how big is the gap, really? Because my impression of the dynamic with LAFC, I mean, I know they haven't played a lot since they got Sun. ah Have they played since? I don't know i don't think the Seattle's played LAFC yet. No, we haven't played them. Yeah. So Seattle hasn't played this iteration of LAFC, but in terms of the general dynamic between Seattle and LAFC right now, I see it as pretty even. Like I know there, a lot of people like to talk about how LAFC owns Seattle. Not really like LA, Seattle beat LAFC in the playoffs in 2024.
00:37:53
Speaker
twenty twenty four Yeah. They have the best win. One of the best wins in club history over them in the 2019 playoffs. That was one of the best days ever of my life. Like that was such a great game, you know, yeah so Seattle has gotten LAFC a couple of times and then as for any supposed gap with Inter-Miami, I mean, with what their roster looks like now, so if Seattle played Inter-Miami, I would pick Inter-Miami to win. But like the, what happened the last time they played in a, ah in a cup final, the gap didn't seem to be skewed all that like much further in their direction in that situation. So ah I think, I think that Seattle can compete with these teams, but I also, i mean, you gotta be realistic. Like these are kind of different animals than that we've seen in the league in the last couple of years. Now it's time to see what the bot picked. Watchability.app.
00:38:45
Speaker
What are the top five? We'll give our commentary on it. We'll see what their commentary is. Number five, Seattle Sounders versus Colorado Rapids. A League's Cup champion, a World Cup stadium in waiting, one home game before a five-match road trip. Seattle doesn't waste openers.
00:39:05
Speaker
I think it's actually a better pick than i thought on first glance, just because the way I was originally thinking of it was like, I mean, all right. Yeah. Seattle is considered, i guess, one of the most watchable teams by the national apparatus, but ah the Rapids are not like it's the Rapids. It's not that sick of matchup. But the Rapids are getting some some hype. I will tell you that. Like ah Rafa Navarro is apparently going full Osase at their camp. And ah they also have a new coach who could be good. So like I actually, the Rapids are another one of my ah one of my picks for a team that's going to be quite a bit better than people think this year.
00:39:47
Speaker
Number four, St. Louis City versus Charlotte FC. The literal first kick of the 2026 season. 30 clubs still think they're winning it all. That delusion has about 90 minutes to live.
00:40:02
Speaker
Yeah, i don't ah I don't really get this one because I think i think Charlotte makes sense. I like watching them. Pepiel. They got him back, which was not a certain thing. That was huge. And our favorite player in the entire league who needs a podcast. Yeah.
00:40:21
Speaker
Willie Zaha, but ah they also got Luca De La Torre, which I think like he actually looked really good for San Diego last year. i was surprised they let him go. yeah So Charlotte, I think they're going to be very watchable. St. Louis, I don't really to watch them. I don't rate them either. We'll see.
00:40:38
Speaker
Number three, the Vancouver Whitecaps versus Real Salt Lake. Last year's MLS Cup finalists, Mueller said, we will be back stronger. First chance to prove the man right.
00:40:50
Speaker
At BC Place. I guess this is watchable because of ah Tommy Mule and the Whitecaps were one of the most fun teams to watch last year. Real Salt Lake, actually, there's more of a case ah for hype for them than there is, I think, for St. Louis. For sure. They did sign a couple of big money players.
00:41:10
Speaker
ah Pablo. They have their star boy. Yeah, they got their star boy. He's a very marketable, likable, watchable player. And Pablo, you know, not known for being the most fun style to watch. But, like, when you, when you what I will say about him, it was when you give him he that he's always in situations where he has to Ramsey it. Yes. yes Always. When he's not in that situation, he does't he does not do that. Like he actually will try to get his team playing like fun, good soccer.
00:41:44
Speaker
So if the new players they signed allow him to do that, which is not a certainty, but if they do, I could see ah RSL being more fun than anticipated. So that's probably where it's coming from.
00:41:56
Speaker
Number two, LA Galaxy versus New York City FC. Our matching pick, the 2024 MLS Cup champions finished 14th last year.
00:42:07
Speaker
Pooj tours ACL again. They signed Marco Reus anyway. This is either a comeback or a very expensive funeral. I guess that rationale kind of makes sense. Like it's like, even, even if they're bad and not fun to watch, like the downfall will be what makes them watch. i It'll be a good hate watch. I actually, I like the angle. I can see that. I really like that can that because the galaxy's downfall, honestly, like it was kind of fun to watch. It was great. Dude, i was watching every I was watching every single one of their matches. Yeah. like Because they were they would be like they were up and then they would concede three goals and then it was just like awesome. Honestly, if I had been a a fan of that team, obviously would have sucked and not been fun. But I think I i would have found a way to cope by being like, this is like comedically bad. Yeah. Like, so they have, maybe they have that going for them. It's like, it's like watching the Kansas city chiefs. You're always rooting for them to lose. yes You know what I'm saying? So I can totally see that in New York city FC is a likable team, but ah yeah, no, I mean, I think we're, we're in alignment on that number two, but I like the rationale that the bot is giving number one.
00:43:19
Speaker
We'll, Number one, most watchable, the number one in the watchability index for Major League Soccer week one is none other than the Los Angeles Football Club versus Inter-Miami. Sun versus Messi, 77,000 seats at the Coliseum, a league that used to beg for attention, just booked the cathedral.
00:43:43
Speaker
I don't even think we need to add to that. Like that pretty much sizes it up. Yeah. The sun versus messy in the Coliseum and that's going be lit. It's going to be beautiful. It's going to be incredible. And we will be watching.
00:43:57
Speaker
If you want to check out this app, It talks literally world football. I have been getting more into watching other games and other leagues literally just by going on watchability.app.
00:44:09
Speaker
It'll tell me what the best games are, and I have not been disappointed since. And again, listener to the show created this app, and we're excited to to do some more stuff with them. So that's that. We will see who wins, us or the bot.
00:44:23
Speaker
I think it might be us this week, though. I got to be honest. I'm taking us. I'm taking us. That's it for the bonus episode. Thank you so much for watching. We love you all, and we will see you on our post-match live. Appreciate you all. Peace.