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00:00:01
#122 - 4 Hidden Things Holding You Back (And How to Get Past Them)
20 Plays5 days ago
It’s hard to fix problems you don’t even see clearly. If you feel like you’re doing everything right but still not making progress this episode will help you figure out why.
In this episode, I break down:
- The perfection trap that keeps smart people stuck at the starting line
- Why your expectations are making you quit too soon
- The real reason it feels like you're spinning your wheels (and how to fix it)
- How to start shifting your identity with small, consistent wins
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Transcript
Introduction to the Fit-ish Project
00:00:03
Speaker
Welcome back to the Fit-ish Project with your host, Lathan Bass, where we make fitness and health simple for regular people like you and I. We got a another weekly episode coming at you, as always. Before I get into this, if you enjoy this podcast, have got some value from it, if you could leave a review, just continue to get this out to more of the people who need it. I do appreciate that, and it helps more than you probably realize. So,
00:00:27
Speaker
Getting into this week's episode.
Authenticity in Podcasting
00:00:29
Speaker
So I talked to a buddy of mine last week. He called me up and we hadn't spoke for a while. And we just got on the topic of just talking about fitness and some mindset stuff and personal growth. And he's a fitness guy too. Like he enjoys working out and he's been trying to drop some weight and just get in the gym and things like that. And we ended up having like a two hour conversation just all about all those things that I just mentioned.
00:00:54
Speaker
And he mentioned while we were talking, he was like, you know, i really like your posts and stuff, but sometimes I feel like you just holding back just a little bit. Like some of the stuff that you're telling me right now, he's like, I think more people need to hear that.
00:01:06
Speaker
And so I got to thinking a little bit and I was like, well, why not take it to the pod? Because I think we did cover a lot of really good stuff. And so typically when I come into these podcasts, I like to have some sort of outline where,
00:01:17
Speaker
I'm teaching you something or giving you some tips or going over some just common topics or trying to solve some common issues that a lot of people have. But with this one, I thought that I would just hop on here and just talk about some things and just let it flow a little bit and just get a little bit raw and real and just talk about some certain things. Because for me, I know just putting out content and social media and things like that, it's never been my thing to get on there and like shout at people or and tell people what to do or try to shame them or guilt them or things like that.
00:01:46
Speaker
My goal is always to be just real and authentic and to share my experience and also experience and how I help other people. But I also think at the same time, it's really important to just be honest with yourself because at the end of the day, you're the one that has to make all the changes.
00:02:02
Speaker
I can't make you do it. Nobody else can make you do it. A coach can't make you do it. It's got to really be
Transformative Self-Motivation
00:02:08
Speaker
on you. And that's one of the things that I personally struggled with just with teaching and with coaching people is like you can see so much potential in people and you realize just how far they could be and all the amazing things that they could do.
00:02:21
Speaker
But if they're they don't see it or if they decide not to act on it, there's really nothing that you can do. But sometimes the right message will hit at the right time or somebody will say something that just really clicks with you in that moment or you hear some perspective or some story that just gives you the motivation or gives you the inspiration or gives you the tools to do better. And so Getting into this episode, I just wanted to cover some things that have kind of been on my mind a little bit, and maybe you'll have one of those light bulb moments and this will help you out a little bit. So one of the things that we were talking about with my buddy was just this idea about how many people use perfectionism as a disguise to just procrastinate.
00:02:59
Speaker
And I hate when I hear people say I'm an all or nothing person or i can't do it because I have this perfection mindset, because to me, it's honestly just an excuse because you there's no such thing as an all or nothing person.
00:03:12
Speaker
there's only all or nothing people in certain areas. Because if you were an all or nothing person, by definition, you would be all or nothing in every area of your life. And that's just not true because the world would not function if we had those types of people. If you were an all or nothing person, that means the first time that you made an error or a mistake when you were driving, you would never drive again.
00:03:30
Speaker
The first time you make some dumb spending mistake, you would just give up on finances. You go to your work, you go to your job, you have a bad day, you make some mistakes, you mess up. Do you quit that job?
00:03:40
Speaker
Absolutely not. Like if you have kids and you're raising them and they make a mistake, do you not love them anymore? Or if you forget to brush your teeth one night because you fall asleep early on the couch, do you never brush your teeth anymore and let your teeth fall out?
00:03:52
Speaker
Absolutely not. It's just ridiculous. So when people approach fitness, In health with this perfection mindset or use this all or nothing as like, this is my excuse as to why I'm not doing it. Or if I can't be perfect this whole entire week, then I'm not going to do anything at all.
00:04:07
Speaker
Or I make some error and so I have to wait until Monday or the first of the month or next year to start again because everything needs to be perfect. It's not productive and it doesn't do anything
Imperfect Action vs. Perfectionism
00:04:17
Speaker
for you. I'm such a big proponent of the 1% better mindset because something, no matter how small, is always going to be beneficial because you never need to be perfect. You don't need to be perfect to...
00:04:29
Speaker
get good fitness results. You don't need to be perfect at your job. You don't need to be perfect in really any area. And it's really just extremely counterproductive to any type of goals that you might have to think that you are going to be perfect in any certain area. Because when you have this all or nothing, when you have this perfection mindset, when you think everything needs to be completely right and you need to know everything that you need to do, it stops you from ever taking action.
00:04:52
Speaker
And when you don't take any action, it's really hard to get any kind of clarity. It's really hard to build any type of momentum. And so you just stay stuck. And then every single day that you continue to not take action, you're just continuing to reinforce that.
00:05:05
Speaker
And then before you know it, it becomes this huge thing of where like, I don't want to start because I've waited so long. I've dug myself in this hole and it just continues to go down this bad path. Whereas if you start and you start to just focus on that imperfect action, just doing things, regardless of whether you know exactly what you're doing, you're doing something.
00:05:25
Speaker
Or if you don't maybe have all the knowledge that you need or all the skills that you need, you're doing the things that you actually do know how to do. Because once you get that ball rolling a little bit, you can start to create some momentum. You can only read about or look at videos of how to do a certain exercise or learn this new thing for so long before you actually have to take that action and do the thing to actually learn the thing.
00:05:46
Speaker
And I think that if more people just started before they were ready or just started when they didn't know everything or when they started when they just didn't have all the knowledge that they needed, they would make so much more progress because you can't just expect to know everything at the beginning. There's always going to be that learning curve.
00:06:00
Speaker
You just have to accept that. And the other reason why I think the perfection mindset or like waiting until the right time to start just makes zero sense. Because if you start or if you approach any certain kind of goal with that mindset of like, everything needs to just be perfectly in place before I start.
00:06:18
Speaker
All that is saying is that as soon as things start to not be perfect, that is giving you the perfect excuse to quit. And you see this all the time with people. So like they start when everything is perfect. They start January 1 where like,
00:06:31
Speaker
They're super motivated and they're excited and they have this plan and like they're going to do all these things. But then the first sign of any kind of stress, any kind of busyness, something comes up that was unexpected. It's the perfect excuse to just fall off and not continue to do things.
00:06:47
Speaker
But that's just not real life. That's not realistic. That's not how we live our lives. like Things are going to continue to come up that are unexpected. There's going to be seasons and phases of life where we're stressed out. You have kids, you have things going on, work gets busy, you have family issues, like there's always going to be different things that are coming up.
00:07:05
Speaker
You have to learn to adjust to those things and just continue to roll with it as those
Consistency and Recovery
00:07:10
Speaker
things come up. Because if you're only working out under the perfect circumstances, when like your body feels 100%, when you have all the time in the world, when You wake up and the weather is perfect. Like there's always going to be some certain excuse that you can find and use to not do the things that you want to do. And so you have to start to flip that and just start to become a person who just makes do and a person who can just figure things out on the fly a little bit and adjust and not let that derail you completely.
00:07:38
Speaker
One thing that I hear from clients a lot is that I fell off track and I'm struggling to get back on track. And I think this coincides with that whole like all or nothing with that perfectionist mindset of like, if I messed up, I screwed everything up. I messed up all my progress. um I'm digging myself in a hole. And again, it's just not the case. Like you're always just one decision away. Like you're one workout away. You're one meal away. You're one choice away.
00:08:04
Speaker
from being right back on track. But when you build it up in your head, and you allow it to be this big thing of like, oh I messed up, I screwed my progress up, like I shouldn't have did that, you feel guilty about it, it's, again, it's not productive for you. And so when you start to just understand those things are going to happen,
00:08:22
Speaker
you're going to make mistakes. You're going to have certain little failures. you're going to have some setbacks. Things are going to come up. What can you learn from those things? And then how can you get back on track sooner and continue to just keep things rolling? Because I've mentioned this before, but I think a big misconception about people who are like healthy or fit or in just people who are successful in different areas in their life, people look at those types of people and they think that they just have it all figured out and that they rarely make mistakes or that they rarely fall off or that,
00:08:50
Speaker
things don't come up in their life. And that's just not true. Like we all have things that come up. We all make mistakes. We all have setbacks. The huge difference between those people who are successful in certain areas and those people who aren't is the amount of time that they have between when they make that mistake versus when they get back on track. So the person who dwells on it, who feels guilty, who lets it not just one mistake sit there and just learn from it. But they let that turn into multiple mistakes or multiple days or even weeks or months of being off track and letting that turn into something that it never, ever had to be.
00:09:23
Speaker
People who are fit and healthy, they don't let one missed workout throw them off or they don't let one missed meal like completely throw them off or even a couple days. like They just get back on track sooner than other people.
00:09:34
Speaker
And they don't let those one singular events turn into this big deal because it doesn't have to be. That's literally just all in your head. The reality is you made ah simple mistake. You made you had a little setback like something popped up.
00:09:47
Speaker
You're seconds away from just making that next good choice and being right back on track. It does not have to be this big thing. It doesn't have to be something that you feel terrible about. Should you learn from that? Absolutely. But it doesn't have to be something that sets you back and turns into this huge spiral.
00:10:02
Speaker
So this perfection mindset is just something that I think a lot more people could see better results and be so much more successful with just fitness and health if they started to shift that from like everything has to be perfect to
Realistic Fitness Goals
00:10:14
Speaker
what can I do today? Like what are the things that I'm able to get right today versus like having everything have to be perfect?
00:10:21
Speaker
The second thing I wanted to touch on. So let's say you get over that perfection mindset. You're in this thing. You're ready to make it happen. You're ready to just get on with this and you're ready to really commit to the process. Well, another huge mistake that I see so many people make with fitness and health is their expectations versus what reality actually is.
00:10:41
Speaker
And what I mean by that is that A lot of people come into these fitness goals or they have these big aspirations about like, I want to lose 50 pounds. I want to get in a great shape. I want to be the most fit that I've ever been in. And they have these expectations that these things are going to happen in a couple of months, or they're going to make these huge transformations within 30 days or 60 days or lose 20 pounds every single month or build crazy amounts of muscle in a couple of months. And that's just not the reality of how these things work.
00:11:13
Speaker
And when you have this huge gap between the expectations and what's actually going to go on, there's this big disconnect. And that's where a lot of people struggle because they're putting in some work and they're thinking they should be having this certain result.
00:11:26
Speaker
But it's just that's not the reality of it. Like losing three to five pounds in a month is actually good progress. But most people have this expectation that they should be losing 10, 15, 20 pounds a month and just doing these absolutely crazy things or that they're transformation about getting in the best shape of their life should happen in a couple of months or that they're going to be able to go from literally doing no exercise at all to being the most fit they've ever been in three months and so expectations around fitness and health are wildly inaccurate a lot of times and i think social media doesn't do us any favors here because you get on here and you see somebody who like claims they made these transformations and you know three or four months and they lost 100 pounds and they did all this crazy stuff and they built this crazy physique but the thing about those
00:12:13
Speaker
stories is that you have no idea what's actually going on. Like you only see the before an actor picture or you hear these claims that people are making, but you don't know what these people did to number one, get those things. And you don't even know if those things are that they're saying are even true. And so you find yourself comparing yourself to people that you probably should never even be comparing yourself to. And it starts to make the things that you're doing seem insignificant.
00:12:38
Speaker
And like with these people who claim these things it's like you don't know if they're taking certain medicines you don't know if they're taking steroids you don't know if what they're doing is even healthy you don't know if they're going to be able to sustain those things you don't know how much time they're putting into like you don't know any of these things about these people and so to compare yourself to these things or to have these unrealistic expectations around like fitness and health only does bad things for the way that you're going to approach this and so having real expectations is such a big thing going into this because the way i look at it is if you go into this and you have unrealistic expectations you're just setting yourself up for failure like you lost before you even started because no matter if you actually are putting in really good work and you're getting really good results
00:13:23
Speaker
to you in your mind, you're gonna be thinking that you're doing less. And I see this with clients a lot too. It's like a client will lose like five, six pounds in a month and they're like, I feel like I'm not doing enough. Like what can I be doing better? Or like, I feel like this is really slow. And then I have to manage those expectations and really let them know this is actually really good progress. Like you lost five pounds this month, that's awesome.
00:13:44
Speaker
If you could lose five pounds every single month for a year, you'd be down 60 pounds in a year. And that's life-changing for tons of people. And so when you actually start to approach this in a more realistic way, you're able to manage expectations better and it actually becomes way more enjoyable. Because if you have these certain expectations that are just not realistic, you're just always going to be disappointed. You're always going to feel like you're not doing enough. You're always going to feel like you're coming up short.
00:14:09
Speaker
You're always going to wonder, is all this even worth it? When in reality, you could be doing really good things. And so don't let that gap of unrealistic expectations and what reality is actually going to be like be too big. Because when those things don't match up, it makes this process really difficult to commit to and really difficult to stick to. And it's just unenjoyable.
00:14:28
Speaker
And so go into this understanding that it's going to be hard sometimes. Progress is probably going to be slower than you want it to be. I can almost guarantee that because we all want faster progress, but that's just not the reality of how this works. And when you can approach it with a more realistic outlook, you're much more likely to actually see this through and to actually stick with it and to actually have some enjoyment along this process.
00:14:54
Speaker
The third thing that I wanted to touch on, and this is kind of going in a sequential order here. So like at the very beginning, a lot of people never start or they quit super early because of that perfection mindset. And then let's say they do commit.
00:15:05
Speaker
Now, the next thing that usually trips a lot of people up and why they stay stuck is because they have this gap between their expectations and what reality is actually going to be. But let's say we handle those two things. The next part of this is a lot of people will sell themselves short because they realize that it's actually going to be a little bit harder than they thought it was going to be. And what I mean by that is like after you get through the initial phase of like, oh, I'm excited, I'm motivated, I'm inspired, I really want to do this.
00:15:30
Speaker
Once you get a couple of weeks into it and you realize it's sometimes boring, sometimes monotonous, sometimes it's not very fun, sometimes you're unmotivated, sometimes it's going to be hard. This is where a lot of people quit.
00:15:42
Speaker
And a lot of people don't realize that a lot of just fitness goals, a lot of like losing weight or building muscle or getting fit or improving your endurance or like building the body that you really want. It really is fairly simple and it just requires consistency.
00:15:58
Speaker
And it's not all that exciting. A lot of times, like there's just a lot of just repeating the same things over and over and doing those things consistently. And that can be boring for people. And that can be a turnoff for a lot of people when they realize like, oh this isn't as fun as I thought it was going to be, or like their expectations are off again. And they, they kind of hit this wall of where like, I'm not really super motivated to eat these meals, or I'm not really super motivated to get the workouts in. And so at that point, like when you hit that first initial stage, like when you hit that first wall of like understanding, oh, this is actually going to take longer than I thought it would, this is going to be a little bit harder than I thought it would.
00:16:35
Speaker
That is what separates a lot of people because you're not always going to be motivated. And that's when you start to have to really build on this good foundation of like building habits and using a little bit of discipline sometimes and even using some willpower and things like that.
00:16:49
Speaker
And what you realize is that if you can really start to just continue to be consistent and show up, those things start to become easier because in the beginning you will have to use some discipline. You will have to use some willpower when you're unmotivated, when you don't want to do things, when you're really struggling, you start to build those habits.
00:17:04
Speaker
But once you can get to a good place of building solid habits and having a good foundation of habits, you really don't have to use discipline and willpower nearly as much. When I first got into this and really learning how to do all these things, how to eat, how to exercise, how to be active, how to make better choices, how to control hunger, all these different things, like I didn't have those skills.
00:17:25
Speaker
And they are skills. These are just things that you learn and you get better at. And over time, when you start to develop those skills and you just repeat those things over and over, they start to become habits. And when things start to become become habits, you don't have to use that discipline nearly as much.
00:17:39
Speaker
Because like now being active, like getting 10,000 steps, getting 12,000 steps in a day is something that I just do. I rarely even think about it and it's just easy. I feel more weird and I feel more off and I feel worse if I don't do a lot of these things that I do now versus if I do them. And so I'm not really using a ton of discipline.
00:17:57
Speaker
Of course, there's days where like, I just really don't want to do anything or maybe I'm pretty sore or, you know, certain instances like that, like, you know, you got bad sleep and like you do have to flex that discipline muscle.
00:18:08
Speaker
But more often than not, like I want to work out. I want to get my steps and I want to eat in a certain way because I built those habits and I know what those things do for me. And so I'd rather do those things than not do those things.
00:18:21
Speaker
And I think for lots of people, when they first get into this, it seems so difficult in the beginning that they can't fathom the idea of having to use so much discipline and willpower for their entire lives. But that's not that's not how it works. Like you get into this and you get better at it and you build those skills and you build those habits and And you're not having to use so much energy to just do these things. And as you get stronger, as you build those habits, as you get more fit, all of this stuff starts to become easier.
00:18:48
Speaker
But it only gets that way if you continue to push through that first initial wall that you're going to hit. And you will hit that wall. It happens with everybody. I see this with clients. And sometimes, like, they'll come in and, like,
Progress and Small Wins
00:19:00
Speaker
things will be really solid. Like, they'll hit the ground running. They'll see really good progress. They see a big drop in initials.
00:19:05
Speaker
weight right away because they're losing some excess water weight. They're starting to eat better. They're exercising all these things. But then inevitably it happens to everybody because life comes and goes in different phases and things get hard and things pop up and you get stressed and it just isn't always going to be easy.
00:19:21
Speaker
And when they hit that point, that's really when you have to dig in a little bit and you have to start to really focus on this being something that you want to do and go through that initial stage of like, okay, this is difficult.
00:19:32
Speaker
And this is a time in my life where maybe I'm a little bit more stressed. It's harder to be consistent. But I know that if I can continue to push through this, I'm going to reach the other side. And on that other side, I'm going to have these better habits in place.
00:19:45
Speaker
I'm going to have built that discipline muscle a little bit, that willpower muscle just a little bit. And as you continue to stack those wins, they not only help you physically, but they especially help you mentally.
00:19:56
Speaker
And I think the tough part about this is that when you're really in it, like when you're in this part of the ah hard stage, like when you're really going through it and it feels like you're not really making that progress, you have to understand that even though you can't see it, like sometimes it's really difficult to see or even feel like you're making any type of progress. You wonder if what you're doing is actually worth it or maybe even if you're going backwards.
00:20:18
Speaker
You have to think that like every single day, regardless of whether you see it or not, if you're putting in that work, you are making progress. And I think there's this bamboo analogy that I think about a lot. It's said that like when you plant bamboo, sometimes it'll grow underground for up to five years. And then in like a six month span, it'll shoot up over 50 feet.
00:20:39
Speaker
And so this entire time you have this thing growing underneath the ground and like really solidifying its foundation, digging its roots in. making sure that's going to be able to handle everything as it shoots up and it's able to stick in the ground and be healthy and all that stuff. And I think that's a lot of just having certain long-term goals. It's like a lot of those days that you're putting in work, you're going to feel like it's not doing anything.
00:21:03
Speaker
And there's two parts to this, right? It's like, part of it is like, yeah, some of those days just suck and you just have to grind through it. And you just have to continue to believe that what you're doing is helping you and being consistent and getting those benefits that you want to get is all going to be worth it and the other part of it is i think you really have to start to train yourself to define what progress actually looks like in the day-to-day because we get so focused on these end goals that that becomes the only thing that we're looking at. And we have this tunnel vision about like, okay, I need to lose 50 pounds or I need to gain 20 pounds of muscle or I need to finish the marathon. When in reality, like all those small daily wins that you're stacking up are going to get you to that goal. But if you don't see those daily wins, it makes it feel like you might not even be making any progress. And then you start to wonder if this is all worth it. You start to wonder if you're doing the right thing. Should I change things up? Should I do more?
00:21:54
Speaker
Am I going to fall off? Like you start having all these things, but when you can train your brain, you start to look for small daily wins. When you can train your brain to really seek out that progress, it's so motivating because progress is quite literally one of the most motivating things that we can use to stay on track and just continue to show up and be consistent. Because when you see that progress, it makes you want to do more. Like you see yourself putting in that work and you see yourself getting stronger or you're times getting faster, or you're seeing some changes within your progress pictures, or you're losing some inches, or your clothes are starting to fit better.
00:22:29
Speaker
But for so many people, I've realized that they don't see these things. Like this happens with clients all the time, where I'll be pointing out certain different little things where like they never even noticed those things. And so I start to try to help them to look for those things for themselves, because there's so many different ways that you could be making progress, whether it's in your fitness levels, like your heart rate is getting lower, your mile times are getting better, you're getting stronger in the gym, you're able to do more reps, you're seeing some changes in muscle definition, you're getting a little bit leaner, you're able to actually do things outside of the gym and you notice how much less you're out of breath, like your clothes are fitting better, you're making better decisions in the kitchen, you're becoming more disciplined with your food choices, you're learning to create a better relationship with food, like there's tons of different things that you could be doing well on a daily basis, but if you really don't
00:23:21
Speaker
actually start to look for those things and train your brain to see those things and really acknowledge those things and celebrate those things and build on those things, it makes this process harder. And so start to find those things and really train your brain to seek those things out because it really does make a massive difference. And then the last thing I would say about this, when it comes to hitting those walls or really hitting those those times of struggle when you're chasing a big goal, I always draw from other people in these instances because Comparison, I think, can actually be a good thing if you're using it for the right reasons to help inspire you, to help
Inspiration and Identity Shift
00:23:57
Speaker
motivate you. And what I think about a lot is like all the accomplishments that you see, all these records and all the great things that have been done were done by humans that are just like you.
00:24:07
Speaker
People who think like you, people who have the same abilities as you. Like, yes, we're all different. We all have a different floor and a different ceiling about things that we can accomplish. Like, I'm probably never going to dunk like LeBron James. I'm not going to be a crazy marathon runner who can run.
00:24:21
Speaker
under a 230 marathon or anything like that. But like to a certain extent, there's so much more that people could be doing. And a lot of times we will sell ourselves short because we've never really pushed those boundaries. Like we've never really done those things and we've never really pushed ourselves to see how far we could go. We just assume that once things get hard, we're kind of at our limit.
00:24:41
Speaker
And I'm reading the book by David Goggins right now, Can't Hurt Me. And he has something in there called the 40% rule. And essentially what this is, is like Once you feel like you've hit that wall, when you hit that struggle point, when you feel like you can't do anymore, essentially you're at about 40% and you have a lot more in the tank. And I think we've all kind of been there at a moment where maybe it was physically or even mentally, like you're just at your wits in and you feel like you can't do anything more.
00:25:06
Speaker
And then you push past it and you realize, oh damn, like there is a lot more left in the tank. Like there is more that I can do. And I think that fitness is a really good way where you can start to test yourself and really push those boundaries. Because again, I think back to where I started,
00:25:19
Speaker
And some of the things that I can do now, like running a marathon when I was over 300 pounds and when I didn't like running and when I even running a couple miles would have been a crazy struggle for me to go get to a point where like I ran 26.2 miles.
00:25:34
Speaker
Now the things that I think I could do based on doing that one hard thing, it's like, it opens up so many doors. I'm like, Oh, maybe I could do an ultra marathon or maybe I could do an Ironman or maybe I could do something else. Like it starts to just broaden your horizon about the things that you can really accomplish. And again, this goes both for physical things and mental things because, you know,
00:25:53
Speaker
With diet and things like that, it's like you go through these hard things and you do these things that you didn't think that you had the ability to do. And then you proved yourself that you can do those things and you're strengthening that belief that you have in yourself to do certain things and accomplish certain things. And that's a really, really powerful thing when it comes to achieving any kind of goal. Because if you have that belief and if you know that you have the ability to figure things out and you know you have the ability to do hard things and to endure things that are maybe a little bit uncomfortable and push through those hard times, then really you can accomplish so many things and a lot a lot of things that you may not even think that you can accomplish right now.
00:26:28
Speaker
Once you've done one or two of those things and you can look back and be like, damn, I really did that. That makes such a huge difference about the confidence and the ability and the belief that you carry into other things as you move throughout your life.
00:26:40
Speaker
And the last thing that I would touch on after talking about those three things, because I think those are three things that keep a lot of people stuck. This fourth one is really important when it comes to like sustaining results and really having those long-term goals stick. And this is shifting your identity to who you are now versus who you want to be. And when I talk about this, sometimes people get confused.
00:27:03
Speaker
You probably heard the quote, your old life is going to have to cost you your new one. And I think when people hear this, they kind of get a little bit worried. And the thing is, is that change is difficult, not always because it's super hard, but because it's uncomfortable and there's a lot of unknowns. And so a lot of people choose to stay in certain situations, even if they're not good for them, because they would rather have that certainty of knowing what to expect versus the unknown.
00:27:27
Speaker
Even if that unknown is 10 times, 100 times, a million times better than the way that you're living right now in your old life, a lot of people choose to stay in that old life or stay with those old habits or do these old patterns that they've always done, even if they're detrimental to their health or how they feel or things like that. They choose to stay in those things because they're the fear of the unknown is greater than that pain or that fear that they have or the things that they're going through at that current time. And you see this with like health, obviously, like you see people who choose to stay in and do really unhealthy things because the thought of doing something different and having to give up certain things or doing new things and trying new things and maybe the possibility of failing, like people would rather avoid a lot of those things than, and just stay in a place where they don't feel great. They're unhealthy, they're unhappy.
00:28:17
Speaker
and just stay stuck in those areas. And so I think you really have to start to shift that and really embrace some of that uncertainty and maybe embrace some of those things that you're scared of. And as you start to do those things, as you start to do these little things and you start to make these little micro shifts day in and day out, and you start to become somebody who wants to move into a new identity, you'll start to notice that you start to show up different in the way that you think about yourself is a little different. And I noticed this with people because there's a shift from like when it comes to health and fitness, it's like it starts out as like exercise and diet is something that I have to do. Like I have to do this to get healthy. I have to do this to lose weight.
00:28:56
Speaker
I have to do this because I know that it is going to extend my life and have all these different benefits on me. And then eventually it starts to shift into this thing of like, I actually want to do this.
00:29:07
Speaker
Like this is something that I want to do because this is just who I am. And it takes a while to do this. This isn't something that happens overnight, but I've noticed the people that are fit, that are healthy, that have seen success. Like I've helped a lot of people lose 40, 50, 60 pounds. And those people who have not only just lost that weight, but have been able to keep it off.
00:29:25
Speaker
I noticed this shift in them to where they, it's not, no, it's no longer something that they feel like they have to do. It's doing these things because they want to do them because of how much they realize that it helps them and how much benefit they're getting from these things. And they no longer want to just be in this old place of like settling for not being healthy or not being fit or not doing these things because they're hard. They actually want to eat well. They want to exercise. They want to do all these certain things because they feel like it's just a part of who they are now.
00:29:54
Speaker
And they realize just how much better off they are when they start to embrace these things. And when you get to that point, like when you really start to embody this new identity of like this fit and healthy person, that's when I know that people are going to be successful because you will always continue to stay in alignment with how you see yourself. Like if you see yourself as this fit, healthy person, person who exercises, a person who prioritizes their diet and prioritizes other healthy habits, like staying active and sleep and things like that.
00:30:22
Speaker
you're going to continue to do all those things day in and day out that are going to help keep you in alignment with that. And so it's not something that happens
Gradual Change and Avoiding Backsliding
00:30:30
Speaker
overnight. And it's really uncomfortable at first, because a lot of people, myself included, like, you've been in these patterns, you've been in these habits, you've been in this certain mindset for so long of maybe like being overweight or not being super healthy, or having certain eating patterns or fitness habits and things like that. And when you start to shift those things. These are things that may have been ingrained in you for years, a lot of times decades. And so when you start to change those things, it's very uncomfortable at first. And so that's why I'm such a big proponent of focusing on the little things, doing these things daily and really starting to focus on these small things and like making progress in small ways. Because when you try to do it just overnight, it feels so unnatural and so uncomfortable that a lot of people will just go back.
00:31:10
Speaker
They'll go back to their old ways because there's they're like, there's no way that I can do this. But if you can slowly start to turn that dial and slowly start to make that shift over time, like over the weeks, over the months, over the years, you get to a point where, oh, this actually feels natural.
00:31:24
Speaker
And you did it in a way that didn't feel so abrupt and it didn't throw you off so bad that you felt like you had to run back to that old place that you were at. And so 1% better focusing on those small things. And as you start to shift and start to embody that, what are these small things that I can start to do each day and start to build on that person that I want to be, that will start to move that needle in the right direction. And again, you do that for quite a while and you'll start to notice that the way that you approach things and the mindset that you approach things with just starts to become completely different.
Conclusion and Coaching Offer
00:31:56
Speaker
I think that's about all that I had. I know that was a lot. It was kind of a rant there, but I hope there was a couple of nuggets in there that you got. Essentially with this podcast, you know I just, again, I wanted to talk just on some things that like why so many people get stuck. Because when I think about just the place that we're in, just as far as health and fitness and and issues that we have in the US, there's so many people that are not living a great life and fitness doesn't have to be your entire life, but it is certainly part of the foundation that helps you to live a healthier life, to help you live a happier life, to help you to be able to enjoy all the things that you want to enjoy, because it's really hard to enjoy those things when you're dealing with health issues, when you feel like crap all the time and you don't like what you look like.
00:32:40
Speaker
And so starting to really understand some of these things and how to break through some of these big limiting factors that hold a lot of people back and really approach it with the right mindset, I think is such a key to breaking through and really getting to a point where you actually do feel good.
00:32:54
Speaker
And when you feel good, you can start to do better. And when you start to do better, life gets better. And so again, hopefully this was helpful. Last thing I'll say, as always, the one-on-one coaching link. If you're somebody who wants some help with this kind of stuff, losing some weight, building some muscle, feeling better, looking better, you need some of that accountability, you need someone to help walk you along this path, then that is what I do. And you can check out that link and see if it's a good fit for you. But I do appreciate you listening. if you found a little value, you can also share this with somebody else. We review all that good stuff, but we will see you next week