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054: Daycare and school transitions
492 Plays3 years ago
This episode explores why transitions can be stressful, the key tools and processes you need to have humming to support daycare and school admin, and Mia and Dinah's top hacks for saving time, money and sharing the load.
Mia and Dinah reveal that in a survey they conducted earlier this year, one in three respondents reported that their child starting at daycare or school generated a significant amount of life admin.
Mia discusses how transitions, particularly when starting at a new daycare or school, can be hard for both parents and kids because we are letting go of the familiar and need to adjust to new ways, people and routines. We are hard-wired to resist change and it can trigger a stress response. There can be a sense of loss of what was, wishing things could stay the same and perhaps some fear and anxiety about what’s to come. Transitions are also an opportunity to lean on our strengths, reach a new equilibrium and bring a sense of renewal and growth. We can let go of old beliefs and assumptions with excitement and enthusiasm.
Given the potential emotion of the transition to a new daycare or school, ensuring your life admin is sorted is a tangible way you can make the change easier and reduce the stress for everyone.
Dinah discusses the key foundational life admin systems to have in place to make the transition easier:
- Have one central dedicated shared document or checklist for you and your partner to store all the information, to-dos or discussion points with your partner and child. It's important to get all that detail out of your head to reduce your mental load.
- Set up a folder in your cloud storage to file all documents related to the daycare or school when you enrol, so that you can file as you go, making filing a Two Minutes Too Easy task
- Use a shared life admin email address so all school communication can go there, and agree on a system for sharing the management of this inbox with your partner.
- Ensure your password manager is installed across all your devices, so you can easily store the multiple passwords needed for school portals, uniform and book ordering etc.
- Add frequently used form filling data to your password manager once so you can speed up the process of the endless form-filling.
- Set up informal communication networks like a WhatsApp group with other parents.
- Plan any traditions that are important to you (eg photo on the first day) so that you don't forget and it is calm and intentional, rather than rushed and last minute.
- Consider the costs of a new school, such as fees, uniforms, books, technology, excursions and camps, so you can budget in advance and plan ahead if you prefer to buy second hand.
Mia talks about morning and evening routines, considering which things will change and what will stay the same. Some continuity is reassuring. You can preview what the new routine will look like by replicating the new schedule ahead of time as practice.
In terms of daycare transitions, particular life admin tasks to consider are:
- putting your child on the waiting list which may be more than one year in advance
- filling in enrolment forms including information about your child’s wellbeing such as sleeping patterns, emotional and social preferences, family circumstances and comfort items
- proof of immunisation status - download a PDF from MyGov and consult GP if need catch -up vaccinations
- procuring a second copy of your child’s comfort item in case it gets misplaced at daycare
- applying for child care benefits via Centrelink
- getting a Working with Children Check if you want to volunteer or spend time in the daycare
- dress cod
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Transcript
Introduction and Purpose of Podcast
00:00:00
Speaker
This is Life Admin Life Hacks, a podcast that gives you techniques, tips and tools to tackle your life admin more efficiently, to save your time, your money and improve your household harmony. I'm Diana Roberts, an operations manager. My baby's starting high school next year. I feel so old.
00:00:19
Speaker
I'm Mia Northrop, a research and writer whose first child is about to start her last year of primary school. Where does the time go? This episode will help you prepare for the next school year, particularly when your child is starting at a new daycare or school. Hello and welcome to Life Admin Life Hacks. Before we jump into today's topic, we wanted to say thank you to our latest reviewers, in particular Claire on Insta, who said, just listen to my Life Admin Life Hacks podcast yesterday.
00:00:47
Speaker
It's so great finding you and having so many to consume whenever I want. Well, thank you, Claire. We're so happy you found us.
00:00:55
Speaker
We're passionate about freeing people from the tedium of Life Admin. So if you take away some helpful hints today, please pay it forward and leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts so others can find these useful resources too.
Book Pre-order and Release Info
00:01:07
Speaker
We also wanted to let you know that you can now pre-order our book, Life Admin Hacks, on Book Depository, Booktopia and Amazon. Each chapter gives you a reality check about an aspect of Life Admin
00:01:18
Speaker
clarifies why you should bother tackling it to motivate you, suggests when is the best time to do it, and then shows you how to optimize it. The book comes out Jan 5, so if you want to kick off the new year with a new and improved approach to life admin, order it today. So let's get into today's
Challenges of Starting School
00:01:35
Speaker
ep.
00:01:35
Speaker
We surveyed our community to understand how they approach their life admin, their pain points, and which life events contributed the most life admin tasks. And one in three of the survey respondents reported that their child starting at daycare or school generated a significant amount of life admin, and we can certainly relate.
00:01:55
Speaker
So in this episode, we're going to talk about why transitions can be stressful. And so having an audit approach to the admin associated can really help smooth the way. Some of the key life admin foundations you need to have humming to support all this new admin that floods in, particularly when you're starting at a new school and our top hacks for saving time, money and sharing the load. So as each of your children start daycare,
00:02:21
Speaker
and transition then to kindergarten and then primary school and then high school. It really is a time of transition that you have to plan for. And transitions are kind of hard. They're just hard for both parents and kids. You're letting go of the familiar, you're facing a new future, there's gonna be new people, new routines, new ways of doing things. And a lot of people can feel vulnerable and uncertain about this. So as humans, really, we're hardwired to resist change and this period can trigger that stress response.
00:02:50
Speaker
There's also can be that sense of loss when you think about what's coming next for your child. I know when I, my bubba was about to go to daycare after a year of botanally leave. I was like, oh my God, I can't believe this period is over. I can't believe she's now gonna sort of enter into the system. It felt like this big shift. I knew I was gonna miss her a lot and it would be a big change to our routine. So there was a little bit of that sense of loss as much as I was excited about the freedom and the fact that I,
00:03:18
Speaker
was going to go back to work. And I was looking forward to that. There was a little bit of thought around, oh, I wish I could stay in this zone a little bit longer. And I was a bit anxious about what's
Emotional Aspects of School Transitions
00:03:28
Speaker
to come. Do you remember back then, Diana, or is that just too far, too far for you? That's not that far ago. I do think that I felt quite anxious about it. And I think, you know, I guess going back, I probably took a lot of that anxiety on for myself. And I guess if I could have my time again, I'd definitely share that more with my partner.
00:03:48
Speaker
And I think one of the things we were talking about before is how much people also kind of create more of that anxiety by well-meaning people, particularly for your kids when they're starting primary school, saying, are you excited to be going to school next year? And if your kid's anxious, it's like the last thing you want them to ask. It's like reliving the anxiety every time the question gets asked. Yeah, you're right. There's, I remember one of my kids was not excited about starting school at all. And the whole summer holiday is preceding.
00:04:18
Speaker
People would say, oh, so, you know, where are you going to go to school and how exciting? What do you think and who's going to be in your class? And I would be just doing that, that slicing movement of your hand across your neck, like cut, cut the conversation. We're not talking about school until five minutes before it needs to happen. Yeah. And I think I've even got that now with my son about to start high school, you know, he's going to a school where he doesn't really have any friends every time someone sees him.
00:04:42
Speaker
They ask him, which of your friends are going to your high school? It's like, please, we don't need to go there. Please don't. So obviously, if you're feeling a little anxious about it, kids can pick up on that. You want to manage any uncertainty or anxiety they have as well. But you know, these transitions are also a beautiful opportunity to reach a new equilibrium. There's that sense of growth and renewal and excitement and fresh beginnings. Like my daughter can't wait to go to high school. She's feeling really optimistic about it.
00:05:12
Speaker
So it's a time when you can let go of some old beliefs or assumptions and really tune in to what's exciting and going to be fun about the situation. So we wanted to talk about this because as you're going through all of the logistics and the planning and the paperwork, there's going to be emotions. There's going to be your emotions, your family's emotions, your child's emotions, and you really need to be aware of both of those things. There's an ending happening, acknowledge that, let go, welcome the new and celebrate.
Preparation Strategies for School Transitions
00:05:40
Speaker
Yeah, so I think when everyone's got these feelings of transition and anxiety, if you can really be nailing all of the admin associated with it and just dial down one more potential trigger for things to get stressful and anxious.
00:05:55
Speaker
I think starting early is super key. And I think that we're recording this episode in November because you already really need to have been started now, particularly if you're moving to a new school. I've already been to a parent information evening. I've already met with the school once. So really making sure that you're setting up the foundations almost probably six months before the kids start school is crucial because you slowly need to work through
00:06:24
Speaker
all of those things to make sure that you're hitting the ground running. Yeah and that preparation to just help the family face the transition with confidence and grace and avoiding any kind of panicked last-minute rush stuff which never helps the situation and obviously kids if you've got kids that have sensory processing or ADD or ASD or anxiety or OCD you know there's going to be extra challenges there with their emotional regulation and
00:06:50
Speaker
cognitive inflexibility. If you can make things predictable, routine, and you know, keep things in control so there's no surprises, all of this helps with that learning curve and hitting the ground running. So Diane, when we're setting up, so the paperwork start coming, the information evening start happening.
00:07:07
Speaker
Where should we be starting? So I think that the first thing is to right from the very beginning, you're going to start to have things that you're thinking about in relation to the transition to school. And you might even start thinking about it years ahead. So think about setting up a dedicated checklist in your to do list system that just really approaching this topic.
00:07:28
Speaker
because there's going to be lots of things that you have to action, that you want to think about, that you might want to talk about with your child, talk about with their current teacher. And so having one central place where you can store all of that information makes it really useful over time to get that information out of your head, sort of stop that mental load of the things that you might wake up in the night thinking about and having that central place for both you and your partner to put anything that they think of. And then it can start to be
00:07:55
Speaker
a long list of all the things that need to be done. And then you can either schedule time in to do those, move them to another to-do list, but having one central place will make it much easier for you to get those things out of your head. Okay. Yeah. I like that. Just setting up the spot for the brain dumping to start to happen.
00:08:13
Speaker
Yeah, because the reality is there is a lot of things. And as we talk through all the things to think about, there's a lot and some things are going to be really important to your family. Others won't be. But making sure that you've put those all down will really make sure that you tackle them in the right order. All right. So checklist is number one. What else do we set up in advance?
00:08:31
Speaker
Yeah, I think setting up a folder in your cloud storage system so that as soon as you start to receive documents, it might be signing enrollment forms or paying fees or uniform checklists or any of those documents that might come in via email. Having that folder ready to go makes it so much easier for you to file those things as they come in as a two minutes too easy task. Yeah, I'm going to do that as soon as I get off this podcast with my daughter.
00:08:57
Speaker
All right, folder. I love that hack. What next? Well, making sure that your password manager is humming because the reality is you're going to get so many passwords with any new organization. You're going to have online portals. You're going to have potentially passwords for ordering uniforms. You might have for their technology. You might have
00:09:18
Speaker
their MyKey account or their public transport card, there's going to be lots of passwords. So making sure that you've got your password manager set up and that everyone's using it and it's shared. And if you've got a child who's a bit older thinking about getting them used to using it, so it really makes that part of the transition super easy.
Financial Planning for School Expenses
00:09:35
Speaker
Yeah. So I know you said that you've got, you know, because you've got kids at multiple schools. So there's two school portals.
00:09:42
Speaker
There's medical logins, there's uniform shops, the various devices, the locker, they need the passwords for their locker. Yeah. So it's kind of a hack that, um, you know, often the high schools give their kids combination locks for their lockers and teaching your kid to put their locker combo in their password manager. So that when they come back after the school holidays and that's what their combo is, they don't have to like line up at the office.
00:10:09
Speaker
And it's just one of those things about teaching them some organization skills. So highly recommend getting your kids to do that. Yeah, that's a great hack. I can love that. It's like when you come back from work after holidays and you're like, what do I do again? And where do I use all my systems? Imagine just staring at your locker going, huh? Yeah, that's six, six whole weeks ago. Lifetime's happened since then. We had a really good time to think about making sure you've got all your form filling data set up in your password manager, because the reality is
00:10:37
Speaker
forms, forms, and more forms. That's what school admin is all about. So really having all of the information in there around your GP, the Medicare number, these are the things that you're going to be repeating over and over again, over years, years and years. So do it once, set it up properly, and then it'll make all those forms that are going to come for the next 13, 17 years, so much easier to fill out.
00:11:01
Speaker
Yeah. And our episode that is on password manager and form filling data suggests some of what that sort of high frequency data should be along the lines of, as you said, Medicare number, Centrelink number, next to kin and, you know, emergency contact people. And they're often asking for medical information such as, you know, their doctor, their closest doctor, things like that. Yeah. Over and over. Okay. And we did also talk about the fact that it's useful to have
00:11:28
Speaker
a support system of other parents or people who you know their kids going to be going to the same daycare or primary or secondary and start to set up some of those informal communications networks. Yeah. So WhatsApp groups, Facebook groups,
00:11:43
Speaker
You know, often if you know a few people, you can get lots of intel about what pieces of uniform the kids actually wear, what sort of lunch boxes are kind of the go-to, and things like that, where you might buy second-hand uniforms, where you might buy school supplies. So having others to ask, ideally you want to try and find some who've got older kids at that same school because they've been around for a while.
00:12:04
Speaker
as well as some who will be in the same position as you are so you can share the journey with them. So really thinking about getting that going early will be really helpful to help you navigate entering a new school. Yeah. Any family or friends or colleagues who've navigated that stage, there are a font of wisdom, all the shortcuts. Yeah. And I think the other thing to think about in terms of communications is you're going to get a lot of emails from this new school. So.
00:12:31
Speaker
If you haven't already, it might be a really good opportunity to set up a dedicated life admin email address that you can have all of that communication go to. If you've got a partner that you can agree how you're going to share the responsibilities of all of this email communication that's going to come in, newsletters, permission slips, et cetera, et cetera.
00:12:51
Speaker
So really thinking about you might have enrolled the child some time ago with your own personal email address and take the time to contact the school, maybe change that email address to one that's in neutral territory, because that's really helpful to start as you mean to go on. Yeah, nice one. And you also talked about some of the traditions that are worth acknowledging and holding on to during that transition period.
00:13:14
Speaker
Yeah, I know lots of people have traditions around the photos they like to take on the first day or think about holding a little sheet of paper with, you know, some things that remind you of what their child was like at the beginning of the school year. I've seen friends who.
00:13:28
Speaker
said, you know, what they want to be when they grow up so you can watch, you know, what's my favorite TV show when I'm starting prep versus when I start, you know, year 10 or any of those things. But it's kind of if you think about that in advance, it really can mean that you're not having that to add as a stressful moment on the first day, even if it's just a photo of your child with their siblings or whatever it is. If you know you want to do that, really think about it intentionally in advance. Have it on your checklist.
00:13:54
Speaker
And then it'll be reminded so it won't be a last minute rush. Yeah, that's lovely. I'm remembering when my daughter started school, we've got a series of photos that she very proudly stood for and posed as you were leaving the house. So she just actually, I remembering when we bought her uniform, she immediately got home and tried it on and she wore it on Christmas day and before school started.
00:14:17
Speaker
And then, you know, my son, when he started school, there was no way there was going to be posing for photos on the first day of school. The nerves were too high. It was just not going to happen. So I got a snapshot of him maybe like a week later. It doesn't matter. He's still standing there in his uniform, finally looking excited and proud. And in 20 years, no one's going to remember that we actually took that photo a week later. We still sort of captured that beginning of that time.
00:14:43
Speaker
So I think about your own child and whether they're going to be up for that on the day or that's just going to be asking way too much. And the final thing that I think you need to really think about in terms of your foundations.
00:14:53
Speaker
It's the cost. Now, obviously, with daycare, daycare fees, the ongoing fees can be huge. But when we start to get into high school, it's not just any fees you might be paying, but it's uniforms, it's the technology. So different schools have different policies, but you might really need to be budgeting in advance.
00:15:13
Speaker
for laptop computers or ipads or and often the school books also can run into many hundreds of dollars and really making sure that you've allowed sufficient money in your budget to pay for those if you really need to be thinking about being cost conscious setting aside enough time that you can do the bargain hunting around.
00:15:34
Speaker
secondhand uniforms or secondhand books. Yeah. And even in things like excursions and camps, all of those are on top of the normal fees you pay. So yes, plus, plus, plus, plus, plus, plus, plus. Daycare, daycare, when they have little incursions, people come to visit them or they take them somewhere. Sometimes there's costs involved.
00:15:54
Speaker
So now we're going to sort of step through what these transitions look like once your child is going into daycare or primary or secondary. So those are chronological order. And I think one of the things to keep in mind is that while some things might change in the day, there are other elements and activities in the routine that can stay consistent.
00:16:13
Speaker
So it's worth having a think about, all right, what's our daily morning and evening routines? What's going to stay the same? What's going to shift? How can we keep some kind of continuity and retain some kind of structure so it's not completely different and a bit sort of blind siding? And you might need to preview what the new routine is going to look like and have countdowns and timeframes to help people emotionally prepare.
00:16:37
Speaker
If you've got one of those launch pads at home where your kids backpack and whatever gear they need to get out of house is in a certain zone, this is where you might put a weekly schedule with visual cues if your kids can't read yet about what's going to happen each day. So that when you're getting prepared in the morning, everyone knows, all right, this is what's happening on this day. We're off to daycare.
00:16:59
Speaker
who's picking up, who's dropping off, and here's all the gear that needs to get you out the door. So I mean, with daycare, depending on where you are, you might have been on a waiting list when the kid was born to actually get in
Daycare Transition Tips
00:17:12
Speaker
there. So that's when the paperwork starts and the research needs to start. You would have visited local places, put their name down, and then
00:17:20
Speaker
filled in perhaps a waiting list form and then enrollment forms when they actually get a place. And that will include things about not just your address and phone number and stuff, but stuff around the kids' sleeping patterns and their emotional and social preferences and family circumstances and their comfort items. So be prepared to fill in that kind of information. I also want to know about anything to do with food allergies and toiletry and what they're interested in doing in their preferred activities.
00:17:48
Speaker
Yeah, and I think that's where you should start thinking about adding to your list to find a second comfort item. So ideally the identical copy of the comfort item before you let it loose into daycare. Because there's so many stories of the, you know, precious blankie being lost at daycare and going home in the wrong kid's bag. Oh, it's nightmare stuff.
00:18:08
Speaker
Yeah, and it's not unusual to get the message from the daycare. Has anyone seen? No one sows, precious glide, when hissing and, you know, that kid ain't sleeping until so and so is returned. So yes, great advice.
00:18:21
Speaker
You'll also need to show your immunisation status for your child at most daycares, and you can download that from myGov. If your child isn't fully immunised, you can consult your GP if you need some catch-up before they need to attend. You'll find that most daycares and childcare centres have a parent handbook, and these are often on their website, and this will specify the hours of operation. It'll have a calendar if there's any annual closures, so you can schedule in those days. It'll spell out things like their direct debit.
00:18:50
Speaker
and how the childcare benefit works. So depending on what kind of subsidy you're eligible for, you will get some kind of rebate off your childcare fees via Centrelink. So make sure that you can log into Centrelink, you know what your CRN is, you know what your child's CRN is, and then you won't get charged the full fees.
00:19:10
Speaker
And one of the other things to really think about is getting a working with children check, because you'll need one of those if you want to be able to volunteer. So go to your state government website, usually just a trip to the post office is all that's needed. But getting on top of that well before you might want to volunteer so that at the last minute, you know, you're not scrambling. That's right. It can be real, they're very strict about that. So you can't help out in the rooms unless you have one of those.
00:19:36
Speaker
Another thing to think about is the dress code and wardrobe for your childcare center. So usually the kids will spend time outside every day, regardless of the weather. They need sun smart clothes. I know our daycare didn't allow kids to have bare shoulders. So if the kids wanted to wear like tank tops or dresses with little straps, they had to wear something underneath so they didn't want them to get sunburnt. And on the flip side, they didn't want anyone with thongs.
00:20:01
Speaker
I feel like they said no open-toed shoes. They wanted the kids to be able to run around and not drop stuff on their feet.
00:20:08
Speaker
But also they were outside, if it was raining, they would still get outside for some major time and some play. So we had to invest in raincoats and gum boots and jackets. So you want to do that shopping ahead of time and just know that. Take a look at your kid's wardrobe. If they don't have clothes that are, can get destroyed basically. Covering paint, covered in dirt. It's a lot of play. It's fun.
00:20:32
Speaker
Um, make sure that they're the right clothes that you don't mind coming home like that every day and that you're going to have to put spare clothes in their little backpack. Yeah. I think one of the other things to think about is, you know, in advance, adding your new schedule into that family shared calendar, because often kids won't be going five days a week to either decor. And if they go into a community kinder program, they might be even going strange hours. So thinking about putting that in your schedule early so that everyone's aware of that.
00:21:00
Speaker
change in schedule and that everyone's got visibility of it because emergencies might come up, the other parent or might need to pick up in an emergency. So making sure that everyone's aware of where to find the schedule and it's highly visible. And I think the other thing is making sure that you add anyone, anyone that might ever need to pick up your child to the emergency contact list.
00:21:22
Speaker
Because things happen, you know, my car broke down once and I had to call on a friend who lived nearby who I'd never thought I would have to call upon to pick up my child. So, you know, having that long list of people who could potentially pick your child up in an emergency, think very widely on that list. Don't be narrow in your thinking. Yeah. Relatives, neighbours, other parents who you know are going to be at the day camp, put them all on the list.
00:21:47
Speaker
Yeah. And that's a good point around the schedule. It's sometimes useful to understand what the center's schedule is going to look like. So when do they do meals and playtime and nap time and start to replicate some of this at home?
00:21:59
Speaker
get used to that routine if it's relevant for your kid's age. You might also want to get out books from the library or buy some books and stories about starting daycare and making friends and how it's going to beat it to get your kid excited about it. And you will go to do an orientation program. That needs to go on the schedule. You'll be meeting the educators and other parents. When you start, usually it starts with short visits.
00:22:23
Speaker
So you might take your child and they'll go into the room and you'll hang out in the foyer. Bring something to do while you're hanging out in the foyer. Like not bring your phone, do some 10 minute time killer tasks, but bring a book, bring something because you'll just be sitting there. And then you'll graduate to shorter days, building up to a full day, perhaps.
00:22:42
Speaker
And you need to plan what you're going to do on those days to both make the most of that time and also not be at home, just worrying and fretting what's what your child's doing at daycare. I just, I really remember the first time we had to do that. I didn't plan anything and I kind of got home and I was like, Oh, I'm home alone. This hasn't happened for a very long time. What do I do? And I was just squandered. And then I got my act together after that and I was going to the movies and doing all these things that I hadn't done for a very long time.
00:23:11
Speaker
So think in advance and plan that in advance. And then I think as you get really close to the actual start, thinking about that lead up and making sure that, you know, the week advance, that you plan your schedule so that it's calm, that everyone's going to bed on time, particularly if you're coming off the summer break so that you're getting your schedule sorted.
00:23:31
Speaker
but also thinking about having all those labels ordered well in advance because everything needs to be labeled and making sure that you're working your way through labeling anything that might end up at daycare and setting up a really good system for their bag with the things that they might need to take, particularly if they're needing nappies or formula and having a system that both you and your partner know about who's responsible for topping supplies up so that the mental load doesn't fall just to one of you. Yeah. At that stage, I had a checklist.
00:24:01
Speaker
just a paper checklist that was stuck on the door of the kid's wardrobe. So that had the checklist of what needed to get packed in the daycare backpack. And when you're in the morning, when you're tired and you're just trying to get out in the door, I consulted that list every day and made sure things were in there. It was very useful. Yeah, it was a great idea. So once your kid starts at daycare, you'll probably be signing them in and out using tablets. So there's these parent communication apps as tablets, again,
00:24:29
Speaker
These need to go into your password manager so do you remember what they are? And the other admin thing to note for daycare really is around the fact that at the end of the year, they'll start asking you about what days you want and you need care for in the following year. So they schedule it in advance so they can do the planning. So have some knowledge about in advance what your needs will be the following year so you can get convenient days and adequate coverage for your needs.
00:24:57
Speaker
Great. So then your kids are finishing up at daycare or at kindergarten and you start the transition to primary school. So it's, you know, into the mainstream school. And in some ways the logistics get way more complicated. I know lots of people really relish the idea of their kids moving to primary school because it's so much cheaper. But the reality is daycare is designed for workers and school is not designed for workers.
Primary School Logistics
00:25:22
Speaker
Yeah. This is where that work-life balance
00:25:25
Speaker
family routines juggle thing gets next level because school finishes at 330 and if you're working, you don't if you're working full time. So suddenly you're like, oh, sorry, how does society function properly when all these kids are free at 330 and someone's got to look after them? It's still one of those societal things that we haven't quite cracked. But yes, you need to think about how your life admin is streamlined because this is actually the larger transition.
00:25:53
Speaker
Yeah. And I think this is the key one is the schedule and thinking about the schedule of who's doing drop-offs and pickups and which days the kids are going to before and after aftercare as kind of critical. But before all of that, you really need to be thinking about which school you're choosing. So in the years leading up to it, finding out about enrollment dates and zoning, you can actually enroll from the second in Victoria, from the second term of the year before start.
00:26:20
Speaker
And so then you can know which school your child's going to so that that can really help with planning the transition. You're going to need a copy of their birth certificate. You're going to need any health and welfare information that the school needs to know about, any diagnostic reports, family court orders, all of that kind of stuff. So hopefully you'll have that in your cloud storage and you can print out or send digital copies depending on their systems.
00:26:43
Speaker
And I think it's also a good time to start being a little bit more selective about play dates and thinking about, you know, trying to foster the friendships with the kids who might be going to the same school as you and thinking about prioritizing those and scheduling those in.
00:26:58
Speaker
that can be a good idea to add that to your reference list or your checklist to as you sort of hear about which kids are going where so that you can keep that in mind as you're planning birthday parties and things like that. I don't know if this was just me dying. I'm kind of curious how you approach this. But one of the things I was freaking out most about when the kids were starting primary school was the need to make a lunchbox every freaking day. That blew my mind because they both went to a daycare where they provided all the meals.
00:27:27
Speaker
And I was thinking, how am I going to have, one, the time to make a lunchbox every morning? It didn't seem like there was going to be enough time. And the ideas of providing something yummy and different every day, because my, you know, some kids are happy to have the same thing every day. Those are not my children. So I ended up putting a matrix on the fridge with the five days of the week.
00:27:49
Speaker
And there was like, well, the kids' lunch boxes had five different compartments. And I'd look at those compartments and think, what am I putting in all those compartments? And so I had like, here's going to be the fruit. This will be the vegetable. This will be like the sandwich or the crackers. This will be the protein. This will be the sweet treat.
00:28:06
Speaker
And I made my little matrix and timetable so I could just go, okay, Monday, we're having an apple and we're having some chopped up celery and blah, blah, blah, blah. So I didn't have to think about it. And so I knew what to buy because this was new territory. What did you do? Was this an issue for you? So I feel like this is where I've never really got caught up in that. I've been quite tough on my kids when it comes to food. And I'm like, if you don't eat it, you'll be hungry.
00:28:31
Speaker
You know, I have a much more simplified approach to... I've had fussy eaters. ... lunches. Yeah. I think I just haven't allowed mine to be fussy because that either starve, I think is the solution. So I think I've tried to keep it really simple. I did for a very long time, though, make lunches the night before. You know, we had a lot of complexity to get out the door in the morning.
00:28:54
Speaker
So making lunches the night before, at least 80% of it, there might have been one thing that needed to be made, but having it made and in the fridge really took the stress off the mornings for me. So thinking about your own morning and how early you're going to have to get out the door, I think really can help dictate. And I used to do the lunches as I was cleaning up from dinner. So then it would all be done and then I could actually sit down and relax. Yeah.
00:29:18
Speaker
Some meal planning might need to happen here to think about what you're going to give them and then some batch cooking. I used to batch cook some muffins. Let's see any batch cooking I did with some lunchboxes. But depending on what your kids like to eat.
00:29:31
Speaker
doing some of that batch cooking and having things ready to go so that it can be very automatic in the mornings is key. I just made mine in the mornings when I'm making breakfast. And now it's, kids don't have to be that old before they can start making their own lunch boxes or at least putting in some of the elements of it. Encourage that as early as possible. One other thing to practice when kids are heading off to primary school for the first time is how long it takes to get to school. So if you're going to be walking or biking or driving,
00:29:58
Speaker
You want to do that route a few times beforehand so you actually know how much time you have in the morning to get there. Yeah. And I think the reality is it takes a lot longer during the school drop off time because the traffic, the people can be for many more. So thinking about if you can.
00:30:15
Speaker
doing it the year before. We're in lockdown at the moment still, so there is no school. I think that's also an opportunity, if you can, to explore the school grounds with your child, particularly on the weekends, so that they can get more familiar with the size and scale, the exact locations where you might be picking them up. Because often there's different things if you're picking them up at a drive-by pickup zone,
00:30:39
Speaker
versus, you know, if you're walking in person explaining and giving really clear names like this is South Gate or this is whatever gate that they know when you talk about, I'm going to pick you up at that gate today. And if they're going to go to after-school care, make sure they know where it is, so which room it will be in so that they're really familiar about where they're going to have to go to, although they'll usually get taken there, just any of that taking the stress or anxiety off that process.
00:31:04
Speaker
can really help. What's your recommendations around uniforms and shoes and the stuff they might need? I really think that the first time you buy the uniform there's two things you want to do it in person because you want to actually try it on because the sizing you don't want it to be absolutely swimming and you don't want it to be you know so it's about you know getting it big enough that they can grow into it but not like 27 sizes too big. And school uniforms are notorious for just having wacky sizing
00:31:31
Speaker
like they are you buy like a size four it's coming down to your child's like carbs you're like what the hell so you need to go and and hold things up and see if you can try things on if possible yeah but before you do that you'll get given this uniform list right and i think this is where you need those informal comms networks to say do i actually need everything that's on this list do the kids actually wear this of the school uniform
00:31:56
Speaker
because understanding that maybe the girls at that school don't wear the trousers or they all do wear the trousers or they all wear, you know, often the uniforms, there's so many choices. And obviously your child's preference will be important, but it will also be driven by what a lot of the other kids do. So understanding what the other kids
00:32:16
Speaker
do will help you really decide how many of a particular item you might want to buy. If actually most kids don't wear the dress, then you might want to buy one dress, don't buy five because you don't want to be stuck with uniforms you're never going to use. And depending on your school, so state primary schools, they'll have a preferred supplier. But if you wander around Target, you probably, you might see the exact same uniforms available there.
00:32:41
Speaker
So have an understanding of how strictly they need to wear the uniform from the preferred supplier versus getting potentially cheaper options at Target or elsewhere. Because if they're just wearing navy blue shorts and a navy blue polo or whatever it might be, there's a lot of places where you can pick that up. And same with the socks. They're preferred, you know, the preferred supplier will have some six pack of socks.
00:33:05
Speaker
probably can find some white socks elsewhere or blue socks or gray socks or whatever it is they're wearing. So understand with those informal networks where else you might find bits of that uniform and the shoes. Yeah, but actually before we move on to shoes, secondhand uniforms is also a thing. So I think
00:33:23
Speaker
Finding out that your school might have a secondhand uniform shop, so there might be an option, a formal option, but there also might be an informal option. Lots of parents set up those sort of buy, swap, sell kind of groups. So that's where that informal comms network comes to the fore because you might even be able to find things for free. Often people will donate. And understanding what the secondhand uniform marketplace is like for your school is great because then you know what to do with your old uniforms.
00:33:50
Speaker
where you're going to move them on. So having that decluttering mindset right from the beginning, I know where I'm going to be able to put this uniform when my child goes out of it. Yeah, beautiful. Our school wants a term, has a second hand uniform sale and they just stand out front of the school. They put up some trestle tables and sell everything for $5 regardless of what it is. Top shorts, jacket, hat, it's all $5. So it makes it pretty simple. And I think my other tip for the uniform is make sure you've got at least two hats.
00:34:20
Speaker
because most schools have the no hat, no play rule and your child will lose their hat. And even the most organized child will likely lose their hat. So having a spare one that you can whip out, even if it's a second hand, you know, really cruddy one so that your kid doesn't get stuck in the classroom at lunchtime simply because they don't have a hat. Yeah. And obviously label them because they all have the same hat.
00:34:43
Speaker
And if you want to sew on something to make it look a little distinctive so that your child can find their hat quickly and someone else is less likely to grab it, they're all great options. Yep. I think, I mean, we did talk about it briefly before, but label, label, label.
00:34:56
Speaker
And I think for primary school, the thing that I have found the most effective is just permanent marker in a nice big writing rather than anything fiddly sewed on or stamped or anything. Permanent marker is to me the simplest go to. We all start out ordering those cute labels. Let's face it. We all buy the cute labels that you can iron on and then you can stick on. They have cute little elephants and monkeys and whatever on them.
00:35:22
Speaker
and they're cute, and then you just buy a Sharpie. You have to cross off the name of the kid before and put your own name on. And if you are ordering labels, if you have more than one child, you might just want to have the label be your surname. If you have a distinctive enough surname and it's not going to be like 10 Joneses or whatever, you know, if you can get away with just doing the surname, then you can use the same label for all of the kids. And it's great for things like lunchboxes too, because sometimes the kids might, you know, have a lunchbox that they both can use.
00:35:51
Speaker
I think having the surname is great. I also put, we have the labels with just the surname and I even put them on plates and things. You know, if you go to someone's house for dinner and you all take a plate, I often put my sticker on the bottom. So then if I forget to take it home, they know you're a bonus tip. Yeah, there you go. All right, shoes.
00:36:11
Speaker
There's a temptation if you're buying special shoes for them to wear, especially if they have to wear proper school shoes. There's a temptation to buy them at the last minute so that you get maximum longevity out of them in terms of their growth. Do not do this. No, definitely don't.
Navigating High School Changes
00:36:25
Speaker
Make sure that you plan to do that. I first of all find out what sort of shoes is the go at your school. So interestingly, my primary school, they say they have to wear school shoes, but no one does. Everyone wears black runners. So I went and bought my kids school shoes and then they just languished at the back of the cupboard because they didn't wear them. So first of all find out if you need them.
00:36:47
Speaker
Yeah, and then if you are going to buy them, make sure you buy them early enough that you your size is available because there's a massive rush off on school shoes like January in the style you might want. So go early. I would actually say December would be my go to and then give them lots of opportunity to wear them in so that they're not having blisters and sore feet on the first week of school. That's the last thing they need. Yeah, you're also going to need to buy a lunchbox.
00:37:14
Speaker
or there'll be a stationary list that you have to source. They usually have a preferred stationary supplier. At Officeworks, again, the informal parent network might say, don't actually do it through the official stationary supplier, it's much cheaper to go elsewhere, or vice versa. They might say, oh, it's just so convenient to stick to the school supplies one, just do that and save yourself the drama.
00:37:37
Speaker
Lunchboxes are another area where you need to do a little bit of planning because there is a rush they do sell out. If your kid has a preferred style and must have the latest unicorn purple thing from Smiggle or if they're happy with something that's sold at Coles or Woolworth that you can replace because you're going to be replacing bits of it potentially for the next 12 years.
00:37:58
Speaker
Have a talk, experiment with things. You've probably already been using various containers and things to carry around snacks, because we're always carrying around snacks for our children. But think about what's going to be washed easily, what's going to survive, what you can put a label on, what's going to be easy to prepare. Definitely. OK, primary school, over.
00:38:19
Speaker
Moving on to the final stage, high school, this is where I am right now and you can probably hear the anxiety in my voice. Whose idea was this episode done? So I have already set up my checklist of all of the things that I guess I'm thinking about and right at the top there is thinking about the complicated transport logistics.
00:38:40
Speaker
So for most kids the high school is much further from home than their primary school so often there'll be either you know some public transport involved or a school bus or
00:38:49
Speaker
you know, more complicated logistics in terms of parents driving them. So thinking about that super early for my daughter, we actually use public transport when we went to all the orientation days. So rather than me drive her there, I took the extra time to go with her so that she was really feeling quite comfortable by the time it came time for her to come public transport. So I think really planning ahead makes a big difference there. And really that how are they going to get to school question?
00:39:17
Speaker
comes up right when you're thinking about where are we going to enrol, like, you know, that decision. So with secondary school we can actually, you need to enrol the child by April or May of their final year of primary school. So it is quite a long lead time. If you're sending a kid to an independent school or a private school, you probably registered them at birth or something. There's a long waiting list for independent private schools.
00:39:39
Speaker
So you've probably done that years before, but yes, have a think about how they're going to get there and start practicing how to get there. Yeah. So right from the beginning, you need to get your kids understanding the schedule and it just starts right from the beginning when they're going to have to go to orientation days, but also getting them really familiar with the idea that their schedule is going to change and that they're going to be moving between classes.
00:40:01
Speaker
And often they're going to need to start thinking about their afternoon schedule a lot more because usually the homework really picks up when it gets into high school. So thinking about in that year before setting up where they're going to do homework so that they're really familiar with that and that you've started to plan what the new afternoons are going to look like so that it's not such a big change when they start.
00:40:22
Speaker
And usually those transition programs and orientation programs, they'll start during grade six. If you're in states where high school starts in grade seven, then in grade six, they're going to start doing some of those transition and orientation programs. Or if you're in states where high school starts in year eight, they'll do that in year seven. So again, these are things that are going to need to go into their schedule. We already talked a lot about uniforms, but what we do know is there's loads more pieces of the uniform usually when you're in high school because
00:40:50
Speaker
Often they're changing a lot more into sport uniforms. There might be other pieces of the uniform. So really getting your kids understanding all the pieces that they have and what they might need to wear and what they might need to take and how you're going to store them and have a system for them remembering when they need to take sport uniform, when they might need to take bathers, et cetera. Really important to make it super easy for the organization and giving them the tools to start to take on that area of the life admin so that you're not the one who's
00:41:18
Speaker
looking at their timetable and reminding them when they have to take their sport uniform, but also setting up a system, particularly in those early days, that you're sort of their backup reminder system. So setting them up for success rather than just letting them fail. Yeah, it is the moment really, isn't it? Just have them sort of step up into being more advocates for their own time.
00:41:40
Speaker
And that extends into thinking about the routines before school and after school. So there is the homework and there's the hobbies and the sport and they've got to have relaxation time and they've got to think about their bedtime because their days are going to be very full and they're kind of a little bit more in control. So it's worth having those conversations and doing some of that planning.
00:41:59
Speaker
And that also thinking about those first few weeks, if they are traveling home from school by themselves and depending on what the adults in the house are doing, it might be useful for an adult to be home so that when they arrive home, there's a grown up home to greet them and kind of check in and connect and see how they're traveling. So have a think about how that affects your schedule if you're working out of the home at that time.
00:42:22
Speaker
And we have already talked about it, but I do think it's a reminder that the technology really picks up in high school. So having a system for the passwords that your child's really familiar with before they start school. It's really fascinating that the school doesn't really seem to help out much there. So helping them along so that they don't lose passwords. And I think the other thing in terms of technology, often it's the time when we give our kids their first mobile phone. So thinking about giving them the phone, maybe
00:42:48
Speaker
at the beginning of grade six or halfway through grade six or whatever. So they've got some time to get used to it, get over the novelty of it. So it's one less thing that's new when they've got so many other new things going on. Yeah. Oh, that's going to be my daughter, Arthur Joy, when she finally gets a phone. Oh, I think also we talked about was the fact that lots of high schools have cafes. They've got their own tuck shops or cafes where kids can buy lunch.
00:43:15
Speaker
And some of them are cashless, right? Yeah, so often they're cashless. So either setting your kid up with a debit card so that they can use their own debit card to if you allow them to have lunch orders once a week, it might move on to rather than being the parent's responsibility, the kids can line up and buy their own lunch or they might have some other online system. So making sure that you've got that set up.
00:43:38
Speaker
even if you don't intend to use it, because you just never know. The kid might forget their lunch one day and you might want to just bail them out that one time. And I certainly have bailed out my daughter once when she accidentally left her lunch in the car. She can remember to pick it up, but she left the lunch box on the back seat. So, you know, the fact that I'd already set up the online system so she could go to the tuck shop and buy something to eat rather than having to beg off her friends, I think is, you know, it's good to have that backup ready to go.
Nostalgic School Memories and Conclusion
00:44:07
Speaker
Dine, what was your favorite thing to buy at our school tuck shop? I used to love those wholemeal rolls with peanut butter and honey. Oh, really? Yes. What did you used to buy? Oh, I was all about the pies and the sausage rolls. I don't remember. I just remember lining up in that wind tunnel, dark wind tunnel. It was a cruddy little tunnel.
00:44:29
Speaker
And those apple slices, they had these apple slices with the white icing on them. I see. Apple cakes. That is all I remember. I'm sure they sold all sorts of other healthy things. That is all I ever bought. I never really bought anything. My parents wouldn't let me have anything from the tech shop. So we all have linked to some resources in the show notes. We found the raising children website, the government parenting website, incredibly helpful. They've got all sorts of articles about managing
00:44:57
Speaker
starting childcare, primary school and secondary school. So we'll have those links, but head there if you've got other questions. So we hope that these hacks will make the transition to a new school for your child so much easier. Our top hacks are you need to be aware of and manage the emotional side of their transition, as well as the logistics. Your mindset is just as important as the plan. Set up your life admin foundations as soon as the admin begins or even when your mental load starts to weigh on you.
00:45:26
Speaker
folder in your cloud storage, a single checklist to manage all the to-dos and ideas, so you've got one central place for you and your partner to consult. And start as you're made to go on. Be intentional on agreeing how you're going to share the responsibilities for the logistics and admin from the get-go. Thanks for listening. Show notes for this episode are available at lifeagminlifehacks.com. And if you're a fan,
00:45:52
Speaker
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