Transcript
Speaker: We're going to get a replacement, James, and like pinch meat.
Speaker: Yeah, maybe let's not pinch meat.
Speaker: Let's not.
Speaker: Yeah, let's no pinch meat, okay?
Speaker: This is not that kind of podcast.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, we've gone a whole different direction.
Speaker: There is no meat pinching in this podcast.
Speaker: Are they playing tonight, Jason?
Speaker: Yes, they are.
Speaker: They're playing right now.
Speaker: They're up five to nothing in the fourth.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: That's a big change.
Speaker: Yeah, they're in Dallas.
Speaker: I mean, me or Arlington.
Speaker: Sorry, Southern Oklahoma.
Speaker: But you're saying the Astros are up five to nothing.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Oh, wow.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: That's, I mean, that'll make for a competitive series.
Speaker: Potentially.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Is this the baseball minute rundown with your dorky brother who's way into sports and definitely loves to watch and listen to baseball games?
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Yes, it can be that if that's true.
Speaker: Wonderful.
Speaker: Does he have brain damage?
Speaker: No, he just really likes listening and watching baseball games.
Speaker: So while we're on the subject, there are some sports.
Speaker: Baseball is okay to listen to on the radio.
Speaker: Baseball to me is a little bit, and I don't know if it's because the pace of the game or whatever, baseball to me is easier to listen to than basketball.
Speaker: basketball on the radio is really, really hard or on, you know, a streaming deal or whatever.
Speaker: And I'm just talking about just audio only basketball is challenging.
Speaker: Um, yes.
Speaker: Football's okay too, because again, it goes on long enough.
Speaker: There's enough things going on, but, but, uh, yeah, baseball kind of flows, I think on the radio.
Speaker: You ever tried to listen to hockey, Jeff?
Speaker: Is it hard?
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: Because also there, you know, that you have to identify the puck, but because the players are all like foreign language last name.
Speaker: So you're hearing what you would expect to hear from a football like position.
Speaker: But it just gets to be and also things are way faster as far as scoring is concerned.
Speaker: Because you're shooting like, you know, pucks at 100 miles an hour.
Speaker: I see.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's frenetic, but even going to a hockey game compared to like, you know, the pace of a baseball game, you can, you can kind of, I agree with, I think baseball is like kind of the universal sort of, yeah, I can get with it.
Speaker: Like, you know, get, get the information from radio, but they even changed it this year, Jason, with that pitch clock stuff.
Speaker: And I haven't even paid attention to, I think games they say are faster, but I don't know if it's actually doing anything noticeable to like the broadcast or if it's basically they, they've shut it off for, for playoffs or,
Speaker: No, they've kept it on.
Speaker: So the best news about being a baseball fan, if you've loathed watching playoff baseball because of the commercial breaks and because of the extra tension, it just is forcing people to sort of speed up in a different manner.
Speaker: And I think it makes for less change.
Speaker: What I actually like more so is the three batter rule.
Speaker: What's the three batter rule?
Speaker: So any pitcher that you bring in from a bullpen, you just basically can't do a, we're going to bring in Billy and then we're going to bring in Bob and then we're going to bring in Tim to face, you know, Joey, Jim and Mark.
Speaker: It's a three batter minimum per pitcher.
Speaker: Yep.
Speaker: I see.
Speaker: I see.
Speaker: Before you're right, you can face Joey, Jim and Mark.
Speaker: So they could have before they could have emptied out their whole bullpen.
Speaker: a single batter at a time if they wanted in the single pitcher at a time.
Speaker: And that also drags the game out, right?
Speaker: Because just the act of getting someone from the bullpen takes time.
Speaker: I see.
Speaker: It's about four to five minutes, any sort of pitcher that you bring in.
Speaker: And they have TV time, timeouts, which are two minutes and 30 seconds.
Speaker: That is not going to change.
Speaker: The other thing that they've kind of done is,
Speaker: to increase offense as an offset for the pitch clock overall, for kind of like, you know, keeping time down is they ban the shift.
Speaker: You basically can't pull the shortstop on the opposite side of the second base bag.
Speaker: Oh, so you, you're not creating these stacked, you know, sides of the infield where you might have one third baseman, three outfielders on one side or three infielders on one side and vice versa.
Speaker: I see.
Speaker: So, you know, they can't do it at all, or you can't do it at a certain point in the game.
Speaker: You can't do it at all.
Speaker: The other thing too is the infielders have to stay on the infield.
Speaker: They have to stay on that last little barrier of dirt.
Speaker: If they're in the grass of the outfield, which is another thing that used to be done, they bring someone from the infield to the outfield to play almost a rover and then bring a shortstop over to second base or vice versa.
Speaker: That's kind of a cover person.
Speaker: Exactly.
Speaker: But they don't do that anymore.
Speaker: Okay, so we were talking about this the other day.
Speaker: So I'm a lefty.
Speaker: Jason, you're a righty.
Speaker: And then James, you're a lefty too, right?
Speaker: Lefty, left-handed.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: But do you bat left-handed as well?
Speaker: Do you do all the sports left-handed?
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Golf.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: I didn't know you golfed.
Speaker: So Jason, what's the deal about lefties and lefties?
Speaker: Is that a good matchup, like a lefty batter with a lefty pitcher or does it matter?
Speaker: I think, number one, it's extremely difficult to hit a baseball.
Speaker: So it doesn't matter which field division, right?
Speaker: If he's throwing left, he could be doing an underhand and most people would still miss it.
Speaker: I see.
Speaker: I see.
Speaker: But the statistics say typically a lefty-on-lefty matchup, a righty-on-righty matchup dictate that it's a lot harder versus like a lefty-to-righty because the ball is coming from one side.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: To the batter's field or to the batter's plane of swing, right?
Speaker: So the swing plane itself should be coming into where the ball is coming in and connecting on a certain point.
Speaker: You're saying they have the best visibility if they're opposite.
Speaker: Potentially.
Speaker: But really good hitters, they don't care.
Speaker: There's a really funny thing that fans do is when they start to boo or shout at their own player because they're hitting under a certain mind or they strike out.
Speaker: And I go, you wouldn't even make it in high school baseball.
Speaker: High school baseball players are much better than the average fan.
Speaker: And I think that's why I like baseball so much is –
Speaker: It's a very difficult sport to sort of master, but you get the chess match along with the checkers all in a single pitch.
Speaker: Well, the other thing that I always liked about baseball, I liked slash maybe it was just entertained by, was the random stats that they pull in a baseball game.
Speaker: Hey, Bob, you know, this guy bats 350 on Tuesdays when the weather is 72 degrees.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And you're like, what?
Speaker: Like, that's such a such a niche stat.
Speaker: But I and that was even before Moneyball and all that stuff.
Speaker: Those are some of the stats you hear in a baseball game.
Speaker: And you don't really hear it any other sport or any other fact of life for that matter.
Speaker: That's true.
Speaker: Hey, it looks like Bill's having trouble at the copier.
Speaker: You know, he only from from the hours of nine to eleven.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Solid in.
Speaker: But after 11 a.m., right.
Speaker: Bill, he goes right to bed in his nap in his cubicle.
Speaker: No, you're 100% right.
Speaker: It's not just sporting-wise, it's life-wise.
Speaker: We need to implement a three-meeting rule.
Speaker: Basically, after the third meeting, let's just call for our replacements and be like, we're going to get a replacement, James, and pinch meat.
Speaker: Maybe let's not pinch meat.
Speaker: Yeah, let's no pinch meat, okay?
Speaker: This is not that kind of podcast.
Speaker: Yeah, we've gone a whole different direction.
Speaker: There was no meat pinching in this podcast.
Speaker: That reminds me of the SNL, you know, sweaty balls, you know.
Speaker: Oh, man.
Speaker: Next on the Pinching Meat podcast.
Speaker: You know, it has that kind of weird voice.
Speaker: I like that you can maybe do a sub, right?
Speaker: Or a pitch hitter.
Speaker: Yes, yes, yes.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Or maybe do a pitch slider.
Speaker: So a person to fill in for three PowerPoint slides and present on the topic.
Speaker: Oh, that's good.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: So like a pitch deck or something.
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: I think that might be an opportunity.
Speaker: I mean, we kind of already do it.
Speaker: Most of our jobs when it comes to collaboration, you likely aren't on your own presenting a raw topic because no one wants to hear any human talk for 45 minutes straight.
Speaker: I mean, I like to hear myself talk for 45 minutes.
Speaker: Does that not count?
Speaker: No, it's totally acceptable.
Speaker: We pity Karen because she has to hear you talking to yourself all the time.
Speaker: By the way, she listened to a few of these episodes.
Speaker: And she's like, why can't you just get some new stories?
Speaker: And then she was like, for me, for me specifically, not for you guys.
Speaker: And then she was like, and why do you have to keep bringing me up?
Speaker: I was like, well, I was like, I don't know.
Speaker: I said, because you're really important to me.
Speaker: And I said, you know, I love my brothers.
Speaker: I said, but I like talking about you too.
Speaker: And she's like, so it was just mostly.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: What's new with you guys?
Speaker: I think the biggest thing for me, and I don't even, maybe I shared it with both of you, but like, I'm not going to have my car for a month just because my, weirdly they, at my apartment complex, they've closed the parking lot completely.
Speaker: So I'm basically on my bike or scooter and that's pretty much it.
Speaker: I've just been.
Speaker: You've basically regressed back to eighth grade is what you're saying.
Speaker: From a vehicle freedom standpoint, you're an eighth grader again.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I was, I didn't get a car until I was 20, maybe.
Speaker: So, and I wasn't, I didn't, I wasn't clamoring to drive anyway, because I, again, as we established, I lived in Silicon Valley.
Speaker: And have you clamored a lot in your life?
Speaker: I mean, I don't know that, I don't know that Jason, have you ever, I don't, I haven't.
Speaker: So much I have clamored hands.
Speaker: I have clamored many times.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: You know, usually that's referenced at a clamoring down the stairs for Christmas, but apparently.
Speaker: Wait, clamoring down the stairs?
Speaker: I don't.
Speaker: Clamoring.
Speaker: I clamored.
Speaker: You know, it's, is this misuse of the word clamoring?
Speaker: I think so.
Speaker: Yeah, I don't.
Speaker: Of the verb?
Speaker: Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker: I think we're going to have some serious grammar feedback and.
Speaker: Maybe we should be sponsored by Grammarly.
Speaker: Pretty much.
Speaker: Speaking of feedback and professional linguists and professional English teachers, I saw Mrs. Phelan at the reunion.
Speaker: Oh, yeah?
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: She looks exactly the same, still lives where she lived.
Speaker: She stared at me.
Speaker: And she's like, I know you.
Speaker: I know you.
Speaker: And she went, James.
Speaker: And I went, no, Jason.
Speaker: She went, ah.
Speaker: What about your boy here?
Speaker: Did she remember me?
Speaker: No.
Speaker: No.
Speaker: She said, how's your oldest brother?
Speaker: Did she really say that?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And I said, Oh no, I don't care.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: He always, I can't tell him that you asked about him because then his damn head would get so big.
Speaker: Massive, massive ego.
Speaker: I thought of something.
Speaker: I'll be, I'll be right back.
Speaker: I just thought of something that is relevant to Mrs. Phelan.
Speaker: By the way, it's not like we're on a live recorded call.
Speaker: Now you're thinking.
Speaker: Yeah, no, but I just don't step away.
Speaker: It's like, where'd James go?
Speaker: James clamored over.
Speaker: He's clamoring for some kind of attention.
Speaker: Holy smokes.
Speaker: Looks like he's got two bicycles.
Speaker: He's going to do that really cool trick like Jean-Claude Van Damme did with the semis with his bicycle.
Speaker: Yikes.
Speaker: Oh.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: Look at this guy.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: Breaking out the LCHS Letterman's Jacket.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Hold on.
Speaker: Hold on.
Speaker: Oh, no.
Speaker: Oh, there we go.
Speaker: Live recording part two.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Hold on a minute.
Speaker: Holy smokes.
Speaker: I'll be back.
Speaker: As Jason goes to get it, I'll just give a background.
Speaker: What Jason and Jeff are both looking at is my letterman's jacket from 2000.
Speaker: I actually lettered in speech and debate, but I actually got it, I guess, in like the second month of being a freshman.
Speaker: I qualified for it.
Speaker: And then because I won a trophy and a series of like qualified for, I think the, the, the bar to get the letterman's jacket was obviously quite low, quite low.
Speaker: If you got it, you got it as a speech.
Speaker: So it's, so it, it makes me extra cool.
Speaker: But I think it was just qualify for state.
Speaker: That was pretty much either regionals or state.
Speaker: That's cool.
Speaker: You know, like I dug it out and I, you know, I was like, I'm one, I'm surprised it fits, but I found a couple of pictures.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: Look at this one.
Speaker: Look at this one.
Speaker: Wait, his has bitten cord on the back.
Speaker: Does yours, James?
Speaker: So does mine.
Speaker: Really?
Speaker: Now you get to put something on the tail, right?
Speaker: So you put Mustangs.
Speaker: Jason, what did you put on yours?
Speaker: Mustangs as well.
Speaker: I don't think we got to edit that.
Speaker: Did you get to edit it, Jason?
Speaker: No, I wanted to put BAMF, but they wouldn't let me do it.
Speaker: BAMF?
Speaker: I don't know what that means.
Speaker: BAMF?
Speaker: B-A-M-F?
Speaker: Oh, badass mofo?
Speaker: Exactly.
Speaker: Now, mine says NFL District 2000 with a gavel on it.
Speaker: I don't have one.
Speaker: I didn't get a patch.
Speaker: I had a class of 2003 with a Mustang patch.
Speaker: Yeah, with a pony patch on it.
Speaker: Mine's just...
Speaker: Mine's just this.
Speaker: So mine speech and debate.
Speaker: Mine's just speech.
Speaker: I have, I have mine looks like that, but it's, it's got gray sleeves because back then you got gray sleeves and then, and then I think they went all Navy.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: You've got a raffle ticket to.
Speaker: Oh, wow.
Speaker: And I have the Richmond coffee station mint wrapper.
Speaker: 210 West Highway 90A, Richmond, Texas 77469.
Speaker: Give us a call at 832-451-9997.
Speaker: Please note, if the Richmond coffee station is still in business, we apologize for the prank calls that you will no doubt get.
Speaker: Okay, so my letter looks like I got another raffle ticket that says Lamar Student Activities.
Speaker: I think this was probably for a theater.
Speaker: Some kind of pep rally or something, right?
Speaker: Probably, yeah.
Speaker: You guys look absolutely awesome in your high school letterman's jackets.
Speaker: However, I would recommend strongly against wearing them out in public.
Speaker: What?
Speaker: Well, listen, Jason, you just went to your 20-year reunion.
Speaker: James, you're 2000, so...
Speaker: I'm not going.
Speaker: You've already missed your 20 year.
Speaker: That was three years ago.
Speaker: And no doubt it was because the pandemic.
Speaker: So you're, do they do a 25 year or 30 year maybe?
Speaker: Well, I didn't even graduate from that school.
Speaker: Like I got a letter jacket, but I graduated from home.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Well, because you in Silicon Valley again, here he goes.
Speaker: I graduated from Silicon Valley, everyone.
Speaker: Ironically, though, they were also Mustangs, but their colors were green and yellow.
Speaker: Green and yellow Mustangs?
Speaker: That makes zero sense to me.
Speaker: Don't know.
Speaker: If the horse is green and yellow, it's quite sick.
Speaker: Someone needs to take that horse to a vet.
Speaker: That is an ill, ill horse.
Speaker: Well, no, my letterman's jacket, not as cool as your guys, but I do have a football letter on mine.
Speaker: But I don't know if I ever put that patch on.
Speaker: Did you get an academic letter as well?
Speaker: I can't remember, but I think because you were an academic as a senior, right?
Speaker: Oh, no, I didn't do academic decathlon.
Speaker: Oh, I thought you did.
Speaker: I don't think I'm that smart.
Speaker: I mean, my joke is always I have a Texas public school education, which is a fine state with a fine public education system.
Speaker: But I wring every drop out of that sponge all the time.
Speaker: So I have maximized my education.
Speaker: I haven't checked in with you on golf and seeing how like you put, you play pretty regularly now, right?
Speaker: Like you're, you're practically a, not a pro, but like you're, you're, you're frequent.
Speaker: You're way more frequent than either Jeff or myself.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I've become an enthusiast.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: So like I look at it and I go, you're recreation.
Speaker: You're an enthusiast.
Speaker: You try and do your best to get to scratch golfer.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Which is a person that usually has between like, um, um,
Speaker: five and six plus on every, every course.
Speaker: I consider those people that are 10 within 10 shots of par to be a scratch golf.
Speaker: Every single time they play, you had to be a scratch golf.
Speaker: It's really, really tough to get to that level.
Speaker: Most people that, you know, do it, they've either just played so long or they just, they just kind of know what to do naturally.
Speaker: And so it's a tough sport.
Speaker: But, you know, I like it because it's a, I can't stand hiking.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: I don't like walking up and down twice because I always get disoriented when I go up a trail because you've got to come back down.
Speaker: You see some really interesting people hiking in Colorado.
Speaker: They're like, would you like some granola?
Speaker: And you go, no, I'm good.
Speaker: I don't need your homemade granola.
Speaker: And then they talk to you about how herbicides and pesticides are.
Speaker: And I go, again, I'm good.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: just came out here to, to, to walk on the trail miserably, see nature.
Speaker: But with golf, it kind of scratches that itch because it's not like I didn't like hiking.
Speaker: I just don't like people hiking.
Speaker: And with golf, it's also kind of takes your attention away from, from other stuff.
Speaker: And,
Speaker: Funny enough, you have really terrible reception on almost every golf course.
Speaker: You can actually get away from distractions and humanity.
Speaker: Yes, distractions.
Speaker: Thank you.
Speaker: You're giving off an anti-human vibe here.
Speaker: You're saying get away from humanity.
Speaker: I don't like people.
Speaker: I mean, I don't like hiking people.
Speaker: But then you have a really human moment, though, in the middle of golfing where it's like when you do something like superhuman.
Speaker: And I don't know if you have, but have you already hit a hole in one or have you gotten that before?
Speaker: I haven't hit a hole in one.
Speaker: I've only hit a few birdies.
Speaker: I'm getting close to – so it's like a lot of stages of golf that you just have to bear with it until you get comfortable doing.
Speaker: Some people take lessons and spend a lot of money to still be at the same level.
Speaker: Ultimately, all you got to do is just go play.
Speaker: So you go play.
Speaker: You hit the ball.
Speaker: You figure out what works best.
Speaker: You don't overthink it.
Speaker: And you just get comfortable.
Speaker: There are bad habits that everyone develops, but like, is it making you successful at what your goals are for golf?
Speaker: For me, I just want to get out, occasionally hit a good shot and celebrate that level of like camaraderie and, you know, be there.
Speaker: Have you invested in like a decent set of clubs and stuff like that or?
Speaker: I did.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And they've gotten a lot more expensive.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Walk us through the price point.
Speaker: What are those, what are those look like?
Speaker: So when I bought mine in 2020, like right before COVID like started to happen, I bought my set and then like everything stopped.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So like availability of anything was like negative.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Supply chain went crazy.
Speaker: Very long time.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Exactly.
Speaker: Over a year.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: I paid in total probably around $1,500 for everything.
Speaker: Holy smokes.
Speaker: Well, I guess one of our nieces will get braces, but that's okay.
Speaker: As long as you're having a good time, I suppose.
Speaker: When you're done, you'll just melt down the clubs you weren't using to make braces.
Speaker: That's all you'll do.
Speaker: That's right.
Speaker: So what they've now become though, that same $1,500 set, is anywhere from $2,000 to $2,500.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: And I'm talking like irons, driver, putter, you know, the stuff that you actually need, gloves, wedges.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Those sorts of things like, you know, but once you buy one set, this is what people don't understand.
Speaker: You don't need another set for a long time.
Speaker: You just may change a club or two or something like that at a different driver, different wedge, etc.
Speaker: Exactly.
Speaker: I gotcha.
Speaker: Exactly.
Speaker: And that's where people say, oh, I need to change this element to that element.
Speaker: The only thing I bought since I bought my set was I bought a driver and a wedge and a putter.
Speaker: So I upgraded those, but I include that in the $1,500.
Speaker: I see.
Speaker: I see.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: James, do you have a set of clubs or?
Speaker: I don't.
Speaker: I had them before.
Speaker: I think I even brought mine from Big Five when I worked in Silicon Valley.
Speaker: But, you know, they had a left hand.
Speaker: Jason, that was the third Silicon Valley reference of the call.
Speaker: Not the show when I lived there because I lived there before the show was cool because I made the Silicon Valley cool.
Speaker: But they – by working at Big Five Sporty Goods.
Speaker: So I'll just leave that in there.
Speaker: Jason, we're going to cut all that out.
Speaker: We're going to cut all this, yeah.
Speaker: James does the editing.
Speaker: Never mind.
Speaker: But they had a left-handed set and I did bring it with –
Speaker: But again, it's like left-handed sets are kind of a rarity to find.
Speaker: The way that I shop, obviously, is not knowing if I want to play with it.
Speaker: So over the course, I've repurchased those several times.
Speaker: Maybe the next time we're all together and once that is back in country, the four of us should go golfing.
Speaker: I mean, not take it seriously at all.
Speaker: I don't even know if I want to do a full 18 holes, but even nine holes would be fun.
Speaker: Yeah, playing nine would be awesome.
Speaker: And actually, Jeff, where you're at is a great spot to be able to golf because there's so many good public courses in Dallas.
Speaker: Well, in the PGA headquarters have moved here now.
Speaker: Oh, I don't care about that.
Speaker: Because then everyone wants to be a critic, which is probably the worst thing when you start out golfing is to have someone, hey, let me show you.
Speaker: It's like just –
Speaker: back away for the folks at the pga uh we are happy for any sponsorship opportunities that may please don't let jason's opinions do not reflect the opinions of no but you're right jason there are a lot of good public courses here and the weather's you know now that we're out of the hot hot season so no we should do something like that and james that was why i asked you is is i had a set of left-handed clubs that i bought a pretty inexpensive like starter set
Speaker: And so I enjoy the beverage cart.
Speaker: That's a fun part of the golfing experience for me.
Speaker: The beverage cart.
Speaker: Oh, the – You can drink while you're golfing.
Speaker: It's one of the sports where they actually encourage you to drink while you're golfing.
Speaker: Oh, man.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: But no, it's fun, but it is a challenge.
Speaker: And my issue with golfing has always been I'm very inconsistent.
Speaker: So I can rip a drive right off the tees.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And do great.
Speaker: And then the very next one, it's like, man, you can't even make contact with the ball.
Speaker: So there is, there is no, there is zero consistency.
Speaker: So I have to be very frustrating to play with because I'm not consistent.
Speaker: Like if I were consistently bad, then people would be like, well, he just sucks at golf.
Speaker: But I, every once in a while I'll hit a good shot and I was like, well, that's pretty good.
Speaker: And I'm like, yeah, but I won't duplicate that for another 10 shots.
Speaker: So yeah.
Speaker: I did learn something the other day that I wanted to ask you guys about.
Speaker: From a fast food standpoint, are you guys aware of the chicken wars?
Speaker: I don't think so.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: Jason, what's your knowledge of the chicken wars?
Speaker: We can fill Jameson for what like chicken sandwich I want versus chicken sandwich I have access to.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: So let's talk through it.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So there's really like main culprits.
Speaker: There's churches, Popeye's, Chick-fil-A, Wendy's ish, and then, uh, canes and slim chickens.
Speaker: Are you forgetting about KFC?
Speaker: Yeah, whatever.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: Zaxby's regional.
Speaker: Zaxby's in the mix, yeah.
Speaker: Zaxby's super regional.
Speaker: But I would say what is mostly accessible to people are KFC, Chick-fil-A, Popeyes, and what is it?
Speaker: Canes.
Speaker: Canes has grown.
Speaker: Church's is regional.
Speaker: Zaxby's is regional.
Speaker: Out of all of them, Chick-fil-A just kind of has it nailed.
Speaker: They have the formula down.
Speaker: Are they the most delicious?
Speaker: No.
Speaker: Not for me.
Speaker: My favorite actually is slim chickens.
Speaker: I would probably die on that hill.
Speaker: And the reason why is they – like I would like canes, but cane – the lettuce wilts.
Speaker: It's not very good.
Speaker: You're talking about sandwiches in particular.
Speaker: Yeah, sandwiches in particular.
Speaker: That's like the chicken wars, right?
Speaker: Well, that's part of it.
Speaker: So this other podcast that I was listening to, I learned a lot about the chicken wars.
Speaker: So how KFC and Chick-fil-A in particular kind of grew similar to what we talked about a while back on the Nike versus Adidas, Coke versus Pepsi, et cetera.
Speaker: But there was something that I did not know about KFC.
Speaker: So Colonel Sanders, for all intents and purposes, seemed like a pretty down to earth, you know, happy guy.
Speaker: He's slinging mashed potatoes.
Speaker: You know, he's frying up chicken.
Speaker: He's got a string tie.
Speaker: He's got all these things that would say, hey, this is a likable.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Maybe grandfather-esque character.
Speaker: Correct?
Speaker: Oh, boy.
Speaker: Did you know that before he started KFC, he was a guy.
Speaker: Colonel Sanders shot someone in a business dispute.
Speaker: What?
Speaker: No, no, James, this is for real.
Speaker: Jason's not in his head.
Speaker: He shot someone in a business dispute.
Speaker: So before he started KFC, he was like a serial entrepreneur where he had started a bunch of different businesses.
Speaker: And one of his businesses was he owned, I think it was a Shell oil station.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: He either owned Shell or Standard Oil.
Speaker: He owned a gas station.
Speaker: Well, his gas station, he had put up like a sign in, in the town that he was in, in Kentucky, he put up a sign directing people to his gas station.
Speaker: And so the long and short of it is the reason why he started KFC really was kind of by accident that, you know, people were asking him, Hey, where can I go get a bite of food?
Speaker: You know, they're coming off the interstate or whatever.
Speaker: And so he was directing them to local diners, et cetera.
Speaker: And then,
Speaker: The story goes that one time this guy is in late and he said, well, hey, I've got some food at my house.
Speaker: I'm about to eat with my family.
Speaker: Why don't you come?
Speaker: And so invited this person over and the guy's like, hey, this chicken's so good.
Speaker: You should be charging for it, all this stuff.
Speaker: And so anyway, and so on and so on.
Speaker: But prior to that, this competitor –
Speaker: in town was painting over his sign like consistently.
Speaker: So he put up this big sign saying, Hey, come to, to Sanders, you know, shell or whatever his, I can't remember what brand he had.
Speaker: And this guy was painting over his sign.
Speaker: So his response was to get two of the executives from the oil company, the, you know, the one that he worked for, the gas station he owned,
Speaker: And they went and caught this other competitor painting over his sign.
Speaker: While the guy is up on the ladder, they accost him with pistols and say, hey, you need to stop doing this.
Speaker: At which point that guy pulls out a pistol, shoots at them.
Speaker: They shoot back.
Speaker: I think at least one person died in that melee.
Speaker: Oh, my gosh.
Speaker: That's wild.
Speaker: And I guess it's like, to me, it's almost like there's a cost of doing business, but goodness gracious, nobody... Well, nobody should get shot over chicken.
Speaker: Or well, they didn't get shot over chicken, shot over gas.
Speaker: So anyways, I just thought that was wild.
Speaker: And then Jason, to your point about the sandwich wars, if you will,
Speaker: That definitely raged on.
Speaker: Popeye's had a whole thing where they grossly underestimated the demand for their chicken sandwiches.
Speaker: Actually, there were shootings over Popeye's.
Speaker: But no, I don't have a dog in the fight in terms of... I think having fast food is certainly a convenient option.
Speaker: It's one that many of us take advantage of from time to time.
Speaker: I can't remember – actually, I can't remember the last time I ate at KFC.
Speaker: And again, it's like – I think to Jason's point, we do have tastes and preferences that are established based out of like, oh, I don't like the cane sandwich because the lettuce will serve.
Speaker: I like the sauce here or I like the bun here.
Speaker: You could Frankenstein together your favorite chicken sandwich.
Speaker: But I think in the end, it's like –
Speaker: Does knowing that Colonel Sanders shot somebody make me not want to go to KFC ever again?
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: Maybe it's really more about, do I like KFC?
Speaker: It also brought to mind, if I think about conflicts, so think East Coast, West Coast rappers, et cetera.
Speaker: What kind of world would we live in if like, hey, if Ronald McDonald were taking shots at the Burger King, OK, or Wendy or Dave Thomas, as it were, you know, because that's almost like, you know, it's almost like if you think about Anchorman, where they have the fight between the news anchors.
Speaker: Channel 9 News.
Speaker: Yeah, Channel 9 News.
Speaker: So let's think about all the fast food people, okay?
Speaker: Now, of course, McDonald's has a whole crew with Grimace, who just makes everyone uncomfortable, and the Hamburglar and all this stuff.
Speaker: So think about that fast food mascot slash figurehead melee.
Speaker: So you'd have Ronald McDonald, obviously.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You'd have the Hamburglar.
Speaker: You'd have Grimace.
Speaker: There's some other people.
Speaker: I don't know who their names are.
Speaker: Do you guys know who the other?
Speaker: Cows from Chick-fil-A.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: The cows from Chick-fil-A.
Speaker: Yep.
Speaker: Who else is in McDonald's crew, James?
Speaker: The Fry Guys, the Chicken Nuggets, like little dudes.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: So you've got the Burger King.
Speaker: Did you talk Birdie?
Speaker: Who's Birdie?
Speaker: Birdie's the bird, the little bird lady.
Speaker: Oh, the bird lady with the pigtails or whatever?
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: Mac.
Speaker: They have Mac.
Speaker: The moon face.
Speaker: Oh, the moon face.
Speaker: Like, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: Like Mac's headroom.
Speaker: You're like, oh my gosh, Grimace is here.
Speaker: And then you see him walk in.
Speaker: And he just takes door frames out because of his big dumb head.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You had the ultra realistic Burger King, which creeps people out to no end, right?
Speaker: You had Wendy's.
Speaker: I think, you know, the late Dave Thomas.
Speaker: We'll leave him out of this.
Speaker: Yep, you had Jack from Jack in the Box.
Speaker: Who else?
Speaker: Are there any Taco Bell?
Speaker: I guess that little Chihuahua.
Speaker: Johnny Cash.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: Yo quiero Taco Bell.
Speaker: That guy.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Chihuahua.
Speaker: Wait, hold on.
Speaker: Where does Johnny Cash come in with Taco Bell?
Speaker: He did commercial for Taco Bell in the 90s when he was like – No, he did not.
Speaker: He did.
Speaker: I guarantee you he did.
Speaker: Because they had a phase in the 90s where they were like – There is no –
Speaker: There is no way that the man in black did Taco Bell commercials.
Speaker: He did.
Speaker: I don't believe that.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: We're going to have to, okay.
Speaker: The audio is going in right here.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: There it is.
Speaker: Well, all right.
Speaker: So we'll leave Johnny, we'll leave the late Johnny Cash out of it.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: And it burned.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And I guess that is a technical ring of fire.
Speaker: They have people too much Diablo sauce on something.
Speaker: So Jason, you mentioned the Chick-fil-A cows.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Who else you got?
Speaker: You got, oh, I mean, what am I thinking?
Speaker: If Long John Silver and Captain D are fighting each other as well.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Who are we missing?
Speaker: We're missing Kane from Raising Kane.
Speaker: That's what I was going to say.
Speaker: We're missing Jared.
Speaker: Jared from Subway.
Speaker: No, that's not Jared from Subway.
Speaker: What?
Speaker: No.
Speaker: Jared from Subway.
Speaker: He's the most iconic.
Speaker: Wow, James just snorted.
Speaker: He is not.
Speaker: Jared from Subway is not invited to any kind of melee or street fight or whatever.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: We have Danny DeVito from Jersey Mike.
Speaker: Yep.
Speaker: You and I are in the same, Jason.
Speaker: I was going to say Danny DeVito.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Who else?
Speaker: We have the firefighters from Firehouse Subs.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: The rats from Quiznos, right?
Speaker: Right?
Speaker: Weren't there Quiznos rats?
Speaker: Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: We love the subs.
Speaker: They're guinea pigs.
Speaker: Were they guinea pigs?
Speaker: I thought they were rats.
Speaker: I think so.
Speaker: We have a pepper pot.
Speaker: No, I think they were guinea pigs.
Speaker: Well, because then you had like the Kia hamsters.
Speaker: So I got all mixed up during that time.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Any other fast food mascots we're not thinking of?
Speaker: Let me just – I'm going to add kind of a qualifier in there.
Speaker: Give me a for instance.
Speaker: You can get a meal at Starbucks.
Speaker: All right.
Speaker: But Starbucks has the lady.
Speaker: But you wouldn't say – Starbucks is a coffee bar.
Speaker: Oh, like the mermaid?
Speaker: The mermaid lady?
Speaker: Yeah, like the mermaid lady.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, I mean, I guess the mermaid lady could get in the mix.
Speaker: You're talking about like they have a drive-through and they're traditionally known or they're identified as fast food.
Speaker: I do think that the Sonic car hops on roller skates could probably do some real damage.
Speaker: Because if you think like they're moving, they're on wheels, right?
Speaker: So they should easily be able to kind of swoop in and swoop out.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Yeah, who else are we thinking about?
Speaker: I don't have anything bad to say because I love Popeye's so much.
Speaker: Popeye's doesn't have a mascot.
Speaker: Well, they had the lady, right?
Speaker: The lady that ran the Louisiana kitchen.
Speaker: Oh, that's right.
Speaker: She looks like she whacks somebody over the head with a rolling pin.
Speaker: That's actually true.
Speaker: So the nicest people are often the scariest, right?
Speaker: So it's like she'd be like, hey, baby, it's okay.
Speaker: I just poisoned all of your food.
Speaker: What?
Speaker: And now, okay, we haven't even talked pizza.
Speaker: So the Noid, right, from Domino's, they bust him off.
Speaker: He's clearly going to cause some trouble.
Speaker: I don't know if Papa John's, I don't know what his current status is.
Speaker: Papa John Schnatter, Shatner, whatever the guy's name is.
Speaker: Yeah, could you imagine he comes in?
Speaker: He's got an axe to grind, I think.
Speaker: He'd show up late to the party.
Speaker: He'd knock everyone's displays over when he walks in and be like, I'm here.
Speaker: You're like, Papa, you got to back up.
Speaker: And then does Craig Robinson, who's now repping Pizza Hut, does he get in the mix as well?
Speaker: I think Little Caesar's.
Speaker: Little Caesar?
Speaker: Oh, the little.
Speaker: By default.
Speaker: Spears them all through.
Speaker: The pizza pizza guy, right?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, pizza pizza's got it.
Speaker: But we don't know how tall Little Caesar is.
Speaker: He could be this tall.
Speaker: It's true.
Speaker: He could be nine feet tall for all we know.
Speaker: It's true.
Speaker: Does Hardee's dust off the California Raisins back from their deal in the late 80s, early 90s?
Speaker: Maybe.
Speaker: Maybe they should bring it back.
Speaker: But Carl's Jr. has a mascot?
Speaker: The star.
Speaker: Yeah, that star guy where he goes, and he starts eating the burgers.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: I mean, there's a lot of options.
Speaker: Yeah, there's too many.
Speaker: I don't know how that melee would go down.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I still think McDonald's takes it.
Speaker: Ronald McDonald is basically Iron Man, right?
Speaker: In the grand scheme of like the Avengers.
Speaker: And again, sorry, spoiler alert if you haven't seen Avengers.
Speaker: But he's kind of the figurehead of the fast food wars.
Speaker: Compared to like maybe Captain America is like your...
Speaker: Who would be Captain America in that regard?
Speaker: Like the most- The most America of all the fast food mascots?
Speaker: Grimace.
Speaker: I'm sorry.
Speaker: There are certainly plenty of restaurants that are being left out.
Speaker: It's their fault.
Speaker: Someone from Chili's is able to fight someone from Cheddar's.
Speaker: I don't know about you guys.
Speaker: Again, both fine, fine establishments full of lovely people.
Speaker: But in some cases, it feels like Cheddar's is a watered down Chili's.
Speaker: We should really like, I think each of us should pick like, you know, the potential mascot for the restaurant that doesn't have one.
Speaker: So like, you know, you said Chili's, it'd be cool if like the baby back rib came to life and started like attacking you or something like that.
Speaker: And that'd be really funny.
Speaker: Right, right.
Speaker: And there's like, and then his attack, like his, his attack word is barbecue sauce.
Speaker: And he's just like, I don't know what he would attack with.
Speaker: Maybe one of those margarita, like a shaker.
Speaker: Like that Presidente Margarita.
Speaker: They've got just a giant El Presidente Margarita.
Speaker: He's just smashing his victims over the head with it.
Speaker: Oh, man.
Speaker: That's so funny.
Speaker: Yeah, there's a lot of options.
Speaker: Oh, I know.
Speaker: What's that?
Speaker: I have the ultimate showstopper.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: The cranky IHOP waitress.
Speaker: There's nobody more vicious on the face of the planet than the cranky IHOP waitress, which used to be the cranky Denny's waitress until she outsmoked, braked herself.
Speaker: Yeah, I don't have any.
Speaker: Waffle House, maybe.
Speaker: That's the only other one.
Speaker: Actually, you're hitting on something.
Speaker: Have you seen a few of those videos of Waffle House fight?
Speaker: Those people, those, those, those employees know how to get down.
Speaker: Like if you're a, if you're a, if you're a cook at Waffle House and you're working on, you know, smothered, covered and, and scattered, smothered and covered, and someone throws a chair at you, those people know how to throw a chair.
Speaker: So yeah.
Speaker: Waffle House doesn't mess around.
Speaker: What you got to do, I think, is bring a person that hasn't experienced fast food culture, specifically in the South.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And bring them to three different breakfast establishments, maybe four, depending on their level of adventure.
Speaker: You bring them to the town-ish place.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So potentially a Denny's, but I just say avoid Denny's altogether.
Speaker: Hey, what's your, hold on.
Speaker: What's your beef with Denny's?
Speaker: What's your, uh, what's your Denny's?
Speaker: They're just not as, as, as common as they were.
Speaker: So it's like, if you're in the South, yes, you can typically find a Denny's.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: If you're in the North, you can typically find a Perkins.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: So you have to choose your own adventure based on where you're at.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: So you've got those two establishments that kind of represent the, uh,
Speaker: How's your day, honey?
Speaker: Like, it's the same person that comes up to you.
Speaker: It doesn't matter if it's the 55-year-old man that, you know, is like, how's your day, honey?
Speaker: You're like, I don't think you're supposed to ask me that, sir.
Speaker: IHOP is what I call the gold standard until you find someone that's just having a bad day.
Speaker: And then they are the meanest, angriest humans ever.
Speaker: Because they're very, like, eighth grade dismissive.
Speaker: And then I think Waffle House is the...
Speaker: That's the piece de resistance to anyone that's like, I am from France.
Speaker: I would like to have a waffle.
Speaker: And you're like, let's go to Waffle House.
Speaker: What is this place?
Speaker: I love it.
Speaker: And, you know, that's what you get.
Speaker: You want to sort of see what their reaction is to the place.
Speaker: Years ago, I was at a Waffle House.
Speaker: And the grill cook was smoking while they were cooking.
Speaker: And I said, hey, this person, they got skills.
Speaker: If they can balance a cigarette and a spatula and keep this thing going, I mean, that is impressive.
