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TAYLOR SWIFT DISAPPEARED? But Kesha Came To Save Us | Hot Girl's Crash Out
0 Playsin 56 minutes
✨ In this week’s episode of Club Crave, we’re asking the hard-hitting questions — like… where is Taylor Swift? Is Reputation (Taylor’s Version) coming? 👀 We also get into Kesha’s new era (Minus Dr. Luke), and why that viral hate video about her concert is trash.
Call the Hot Girl Crash Out Hotline at (323) 380-2191 and leave us a voicemail if you’ve got thoughts, theories, or chaos to share — we might play it in a future episode! 🎤
Subscribe to the pod, leave a review, and follow @clubcrave on TikTok and @clubcravemedia on Instagram for more.
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Transcript
Introduction & Podcast Rescheduling
00:00:00
Speaker
shout out mental illness shout out depression shout out anxiety shout out adhd shout out ocd shout out bpd have all the things this dude and me would literally have the perfect relationship i just know somebody wow i love that this is becoming not love line i was gonna say the same thing
00:00:47
Speaker
Hello divas and welcome to the Club Crave podcast. My name is Nick Williams and I am your host. um If you're new to the podcast, this is where we talk all about the weird, wild and wonderful stuff happening on the internet.
00:01:05
Speaker
um I'm glad you stumbled in if this is your first time. um If you're pop culture girly, um if you you know are just obsessed just as we are with the internet and you've got the brain rot of it all, um brain is rotted over here. um Hey, I'm not judging.
00:01:24
Speaker
a My brain is also rotted. um It is, um once again, pretty late when we're filming this. And I think every time we try to film a little bit earlier, but um here we are.
00:01:35
Speaker
It's a little ah slap happy hours as well, would you say? Absolutely. Yeah. Which tends to be a trend whenever you have me on. It's like, Justin, I know it's 10 o'clock at night, but I really got to have a guest on my podcast.
00:01:49
Speaker
Well, and we were supposed to have a guest on this week, um and they rescheduled, which obviously no problem. I'm like happy to even just be thought of as a podcast to go be a guest on. so Absolutely. I'm not even worried about it at all. I i really um am excited to get
Trisha Paytas Deep Dive & Listener Feedback
00:02:05
Speaker
them rescheduled. Well, it's still an honor. This is you know, on SNL, I think if you host five SNLs, they like do a special little moment for you. You get a little plaque. So like I'm halfway there.
00:02:16
Speaker
i don't know if i have a special plaque for you, honey, but um this is the fourth episode. Third episode for me. The third episode for you. I've been on 75% of the Club I appreciate you. you know what?
00:02:29
Speaker
um I talked about in my last episode, which if you um want to check out my last episode, it is a deep dive into Trisha Paytas. um Again, if you're new to the podcast, I'm a big Trisha Paytas fan.
00:02:41
Speaker
um But anyways, in that podcast, I talked about Oscar Gracie and how he... um you know, when he first got hired to be a producer of the Just Trish podcast, um he wasn't supposed to be on air talent.
00:02:56
Speaker
um But he was like, Trish, like, I really think, you know, people really like to hear it back and forth. um And I think that is so true. Um, in that deep dive that I'm talking about on the last episode, you know, I did it by myself, which I think it was OK. Like, I think it worked out OK. I think it was because it was a deep dive. I had more of a list of things that I wanted to hit.
00:03:19
Speaker
It was a shorter episode. i think it was like, no, I wasn't. It was still about an hour. Yeah, it was easy to listen to. i felt like all your points I played well. Thank you. and I'm biased.
00:03:30
Speaker
but I feel like it got a lot of good feedback, which thank you all again for continuing to watch. I just cannot believe the... I think that last episode, you know, 600 so views.
00:03:43
Speaker
yeah that's like I mean, i cannot picture 600 people in a room just listen to me yap.
Media Presence & Audience Connection
00:03:49
Speaker
That makes me freak out right now that right there, there's like a bunch of people watching. Oh, my God.
00:03:55
Speaker
I already like threw my little spiel out before. like I do genuinely believe like everyone should have some sort of like media presence. like Even if you have 10 followers, like those are 10 people. You think everyone should have a media presence?
00:04:09
Speaker
I think that... Honey. Not everyone, obviously, but I would say like 90% of people. It's like a vibe. It's like a feeling. Okay. Because ultimately, the the fact that we feel so outnumbered by... i see what you're talking about. I'm talking about all of like the gays and the girlies. the people Okay, i can get behind that.
00:04:29
Speaker
But yeah where I was going with that was i just... It's freaking out right now, the fact that there's that many people watching.
4th of July Reflections & Political Awareness
00:04:36
Speaker
um It makes me nervous to think about it. um And I hope that this is entertaining for y'all. I hope it's something that where you can, I did get a really nice comment and they were like, um what did they say? They were um cleaning, or they're moving.
00:04:50
Speaker
um And they were you know all day packing boxes. And she was kind of depressed about having to move. And she said it made her feel better. And I was like, that's so sweet. And she listened to the podcast while she was moving. I'm like, that's exactly what I wanted with this. I just want it to be something chill.
00:05:06
Speaker
You can put on while you're cleaning or folding or moving or whatever it is. Just acknowledging that the landscape has changed. Because like this isn't OG YouTube. We're not trying to be like the top 10 YouTubers. No. We're not trying to get to like those big events that the people go to. Although Vanilla Mace, congratulations. Don't speak. Somehow she did it. Don't speak for me. Because I would love to get that one day. fair enough. But for me personally, it's like it is that. like I have that teaching background. and If we count half a year of teaching, I don't know if we can.
00:05:36
Speaker
But like... when you're in that situation where you have kids in your classroom, you're like, I just get this opportunity to impact 120 people every year.
00:05:47
Speaker
and so you've already made a bigger impact. I mean, technically, I mean, I don't know if it's much of an impact more than it's just a place to come and hang out and entertained and hopefully take you out of the craziness of the world. Because y'all this past weekend, I mean, we can get into it.
00:06:02
Speaker
It was just insane for us or the world. Absolutely. So yeah, Fourth of July weekend. um If you guys celebrate, I don't judge because like I grew up loving the Fourth of July. um Barbecue, family and friends over.
00:06:18
Speaker
Very nostalgic holiday. um but It was just a lot different this year with everything going on in the world, I think. And like we spent our 4th July and a great way. We went to a drag show here in Nashville. Mistress Isabel Brooks, shout out, love you, queen.
00:06:35
Speaker
um and i love She was great. Obviously, Mistress was incredible. i think we both loved seeing Obscenity. And she she did a little song, and she's a local drag queen. She sang at her wedding. Okay.
00:06:47
Speaker
Yes, she did. But she did a Reba impersonation better than Ginger Minj, I might add. Although, stop the Ginger Minj hate. Just going to put that out there as well. ah But I appreciated kind of being in Nashville, being in a queer community, getting to like celebrate country music that's like actual country music and not like all of this like over nationalistic propaganda yes yes right rhetoric yeah you know so if you aren't politically aware or you're just you've turned everything off because it's all too much i'm sure you i'm sure you heard um the big whatever beautiful bill just got passed so what is it that the the
00:07:32
Speaker
Big bad built butch body ah bill. the Honestly, it's giving that with the alliteration of it all. um I yeah, I mean, it's it's dark. It's scary. The world's in shambles.
00:07:47
Speaker
um But, you know, again, when I think about this pop culture podcast, this is escapism at at its finest, right? um I'm all for escapism as long as like when you're done with the escapism, like you you somewhat stay aware what's going on.
00:08:04
Speaker
I mean, there are just a lot of people out there who are allowed to be in these bubbles in their small communities and not think about anything because nothing really does affect them. um Until it does, and then it's too late.
00:08:14
Speaker
um So, yeah, I just think it's important to stay aware of what's going on. But anyways, that's what happened the past weekend. um We spent our time again at Play Dance Bar in Nashville, Tennessee, our little community gay bar.
00:08:28
Speaker
um And we just felt like, you know, fourth of July, it's hard to celebrate the country right now. Just going to say it. We love this country. We really do. It's just... you do we we do love it um it's just it's sad what's happening um tax breaks for the billionaires raising the tax on the lower the lower class it's just it's it's not good so anyways um yeah i hope you guys had a good weekend though i think we had an incredible weekend you know what i mean like
00:09:01
Speaker
And i I obviously like i would also say like
Kesha's New Album & Podcast Hotline
00:09:05
Speaker
escapism. Yes, like fun. But I don't know if that's like the right word for it. Because I don't know. I think it's just like recharging. I mean, I always say like rest is...
00:09:15
Speaker
resistance via my shirt community is also resistance. But like a lot of those things that like we treat as escapism, it's like because somehow we just assume like if we actually want to care about the world, we're not allowed to have fun and humor and make time for ourselves when in reality that's just us recognizing that's a marathon. So we spent a lot of the weekend spiraling out about politics. Actually, we spent some of the weekend spiraling out about Kesha's new album.
00:09:44
Speaker
There's lot to talk about. So we'll be crashing out later in the episode. um If you guys didn't know already, we have a hotline here on the podcast called the Hot Girl Crash Out Hotline.
00:09:56
Speaker
Um, the hotline's open. Um, later in this episode, we will be listening to some calls and reacting to them. Um, so super excited for those. I actually keep getting like texts throughout the week saying like you've got a new voicemail and it tried, it gives me like a little transcript and I try to just read like maybe just two words or something. Cause I, I'm so excited to get these calls in.
00:10:16
Speaker
Um, but if you want to give us a call, um, you know, crash out about anything emotionally, politically, romantically, whatever's going on in your life. i think it's a very like general, all inclusive term. Yeah. Crash out. I mean, also if there's something going on in pop culture, like when Ariana Grande's grandmother died, somebody called and crashed out about that. So like, that's just an example of like something that happened during the week and somebody called in about that event. So anyways, that phone number is three, two, three, three, eight, zero, two, one, nine, one. We want to hear from you.
00:10:49
Speaker
um So please give us a call.
00:10:53
Speaker
um And I just want to give a special thank you to everyone who watched last week's episode, the Trisha Paytas Deep Dive. um It was a really fun episode to make. Honestly, i didn't prepare a whole lot.
00:11:07
Speaker
It was just a lot of me just yapping. um addressing some of the haters and whatnot um and i saw that um you know got a lot of good feedback there and and uh support and uh because some of the haters did come through which i expected that to happen so um especially when i said i wasn't going to call them out by name and then i posted on tiktok with their name which we done been but uh i i know you too well as as soon as i watched that part i was like I was honestly shocked you didn't end up saying their names. They're scary, y'all. They are scary.
00:11:41
Speaker
But anyways, we already discussed that last week. So if you haven't watched the episode, after this one, and give it a watch. I do think the last episode could be like a part one, though. Because it felt more of like yeah me defending Trisha. But i wouldn't say it was like a deep dive.
00:11:54
Speaker
It wasn't like a biography. If I still don't know who Trisha is. Like, obviously, I know she is. And that's why i titled it... um Addressing the haters. No, I said ah leave Trisha alone. Yeah. Yeah. That's why I was like, let me... Because that's basically what I talked about the whole time. I didn't mean for that to happen. I think it'd be cool if like you still took like the deep dive idea and used that to... like dive into other people.
00:12:20
Speaker
it's ah It's a cool concept. Yeah. and he And taking those different angles and stuff um like the haters with Trisha because that's one thing I've been passionate about for a long time is just like why y'all hating so
Podcast Evolution & Audience Engagement
00:12:32
Speaker
much on her? also why does it always have to be about like coming for the haters. but if It doesn't always have to be. like Let's just hate on someone else.
00:12:41
Speaker
um glad You know what? i i i just A whole list of people just came through my mind so um that sounds like a great That's a great idea. um Thank you, creative director over there. You're welcome.
00:12:54
Speaker
Yeah, I think I'm constantly thinking of new ideas for the podcast, too, um because I've created this podcast be about pop culture, every corner of the Internet, whatnot, which has really um helped it be a flexible thing.
00:13:07
Speaker
So, like, if you guys have ideas out there, um you know, post them in the comments. Before we get into our little hot topics here, I just want to remind everyone that, you know, I forget to do this. And i don't like when people necessarily do it. But also, everything I see when it comes to, like, how to structure your podcast and whatnot, they say to say Don't do it. Don't do it. No. Subscribe today. oh my God. if There's a lot of people watching that aren't subscribed.
00:13:36
Speaker
So, click subscribe. And you know what you could also do? it. ah You can like this video. Well, that's a good one, too. I was going to say ring the bell. can leave a comment. No, no, no. Ring the bell.
00:13:52
Speaker
No. but happened? The battery is exhausted. How? It's plugged in What battery?
00:14:07
Speaker
um and we're back technical difficulties i just always says don't call it out because then they won't know you messed up but i i you know what we're real we're here you never know i just might want to leave it in yeah i might leave it in i might forget to not edit it out so um i'm just gonna say it um anyways where were we
00:14:30
Speaker
Oh, okay. We're crashing out. Well, we're not crashing out just yet. We'll get there so soon. So, so soon, honey. um Very soon. We're tired. um
00:14:43
Speaker
Everybody, take a deep breath. Everybody, me and you. um Okay, so. You know, it's not really a hot topic, but I really want to talk about Taylor Allison Swift this week. Okay.
00:14:55
Speaker
It's kind of a hot topic because she was recently in Nashville with her man, Travis. um And they were just out and about in Nashville. um People do. Well, not Taylor and Travis. They've never been
Taylor Swift Concert & Personal Engagement
00:15:08
Speaker
out.
00:15:09
Speaker
I do for the bars in Broadway. It was kind of wild. Well, I thought when I saw it, Taylor was just out on Broadway bar hopping and whatnot. It was actually part of an event. Travis was holding like a charity event.
00:15:22
Speaker
um So that's why she was out. But a lot of just like random people met Taylor that night. um And she was in all these spaces that we're in all the time. I mean, obviously we don't go to Jason L. Dean's bar very often because I did hear she was there. Yikes.
00:15:36
Speaker
um But that's where the charity event was held, I guess. And then at the Brooklyn Bowl, which is a venue here in Nashville. And we go there very often. I was like, oh, my God, Taylor was there and singing.
00:15:47
Speaker
I still like and such a fangirl and like it freaked out that she was in the same space. i was like, oh, my God, she's she. And it's like 10 minutes from our house. Taylor, where are you, girl?
00:15:59
Speaker
like, where's Waldo? or what No, it's like, where in the world is Carmen Sandiego? Where in the world is Taylor Allison Swift? Literally, though. okay. I know where she is, I guess. I don't know where she is exactly at this moment. Do they not track plane anymore? they stopped doing that. Really? Well, and think Taylor's publicist, I think, went after the guy.
00:16:20
Speaker
um i just For whatever reason my head, I thought the guy was like, sorry, but like he like backed off. I want to say he was also tracking Elon Musk's plane. And Elon Musk got his accounts taken down because he scared. That's all it was? Is he okay?
00:16:35
Speaker
Have we checked on this guy? No. oh past six months the guy who runs the plane accounts? Yeah. Oh, no. I mean, hopefully he's okay. I mean, i don't know.
00:16:46
Speaker
Scary people he's messing with there. but um But yeah, no, they stopped doing that. um And yeah, I just feel like... So Taylor got her master's back within the past month or two. I'm happy for her. Which we're happy for her, for sure. am. But she did all these re-recordings, and then we're still waiting for Reputation debut. My favorite album. And Reputation is my favorite album, too. It's actually the era where I became a huge Taylor stan and had my fan account for her.
00:17:16
Speaker
And it was so cool to like be a fan during that era when she was like, hated, i guess. I mean, it was sad that she had to go through that or whatever, but also being a fan and being like, yeah, we were there for her during that And I'm finally getting what that's like. Maybe it's not at the same level, but like, that's how I feel like loving Chapel Rhone.
00:17:34
Speaker
What? I don't know. I feel like everyone's hating on her. I feel like i can't I can't tell anyone shut work or any of my friends that I love Chappell without them popping off. They're like, oh, i hate that she said this. and I hate that she said this. i think And I'm like... no I've heard you say bad things too to me. You just don't have a platform. So like why are we like nitpicking?
00:17:55
Speaker
Who said bad things? Chappell said... they talking about me? I was like, I don't think I talked about Chappell. No, Chappell said... something on the and i believe and i can say this because i've like watched youtubers like kind of like do a deep dive if you will on the topic we love a deep so chapel roan check out my oh i'm literally gonna that's okay just keep going because we've got another camera on chapel roan was on the call me daddy podcast this was a while back i'm all about old topics that's my brain but
00:18:28
Speaker
She essentially was like, they cut a clip that made it sound like she was saying that like celebrities shouldn't be forced to be political, but like it was kind of taken out of context. I don't think that's what she meant. And that's why a lot of people are coming for her.
00:18:44
Speaker
Okay. In my opinion, like It's my opinion. Well, I feel like um I didn't. i Why do you think it was out of context? Like, how are you getting that information?
00:18:54
Speaker
It was like she's talking for like like three minutes. I guess at the end of the day, that's what she said. But I felt like it was really her processing people coming for her. Her saying that she shouldn't be used as go-to source for political...
00:19:11
Speaker
direction i felt like is her coming from the perspective that like everyone tried to come for her for like trying to speak up about big issues that we're all saying i mean i'm not saying criticism i get the criticism because she came out originally as like you know i'm i'm gonna fight for y'all like i'm that yeah that bitch i'm gonna be out there on the front lines and then all these issues happen and it's kind of like where's chapel And then she like makes this tick tock when she's like, and Trump, like, what about Trump? Or like, it's that tick tock. And it's like, absolutely no explanation for what she's talking about. She's just kind of word vomiting, like issues that are currently happening.
00:19:53
Speaker
And it felt very forced because of what people are, you know, saying. And it's just frustrating to see that happen because she's like, okay, she's one of the normal ones. Like she's, You know, after a while, celebrities have been famous. They're kind of out of touch.
00:20:06
Speaker
yeah I felt like we had a few more years with Chaffel before she got to that point. I don't think she's out of touch. I really don't. Maybe I'm in delusion land. But like you look at some of these other celebrities. love her to death. She still feels real to me.
00:20:18
Speaker
I think she has a lot of pressure coming from all angles and probably from her label. um to create the biggest audience as possible and hold on to the biggest audience.
00:20:31
Speaker
yeah So she's trying not to go too hard on any specific issue. um But I do think like that's why people love her though. We want to see her go hard on issues and, ah and fight for the people who don't have a voice. But um I do think she's just got a lot of stuff going on, and I wish she spoke out more about certain things like Palestine and and stuff like that.
00:20:54
Speaker
Yeah, I just don't know. I don't know. I won't talk too much about it. and I mean, do people have to come out with like a statement every month to continue to prove that they're on that side? No, not a statement. I think just like, I don't know what...
00:21:10
Speaker
Just like what everyone else is doing, like reposting resources or like reposting stories about what's going on and like just using that platform for good, I think. Yeah. Because we can all do that. But what? We're like, you know, every handful of people get you are seeing it. But then if a celebrity does it, like obviously like millions of people will see it. And that's bringing a lot more awareness to it. But I don't know. I digress. I just feel like.
00:21:35
Speaker
I would have loved to seen Chapel this past year get more involved. um But again, you know, it's hard for any of us to be involved. I think I've taken a step back a lot from posting things and being involved yeah because it is, it's heart's hard on your mental health. And I'm sure she's got a lot of other things going on, you know, writing a new album or writing new music and stuff like that. So I think a lot of it's the standard that they set those like, cause Chapel,
00:22:03
Speaker
comes out, makes it very clear where she stands and suddenly you don't see that energy anymore. So it's disappointing. I think that's kind of what we felt with Taylor where Taylor like definitely ran a whole campaign against Marsha Blackburn.
00:22:16
Speaker
Marsha Blackburn ran, you know, this past election season and Taylor didn't say anything. yeah and so it's just like when, when you set that expectation that you're going to be there for your fans and and people as a collective, it's hard to continue to cheer for someone. Yeah. when they don't continue to meet that bar. It's classic drag race.
00:22:35
Speaker
You set the bar high, and then if you can't meet that bar, you could be better than all the other queens, but they're going to send you home because they've already seen everything you can do. so And that's the thing with Taylor Swift was she did the whole You Need to Calm Down song, which was iconic
Public Displays of Love & Community Support
00:22:51
Speaker
for the moment. That year, 2019, was year... Pride was cool then. was cool to be Spelling
00:22:57
Speaker
um it cool is fun Okay, that's a whole different song. But that same era. Yes, good job. um but Taylor Swift is very special to me and you now.
00:23:12
Speaker
So it's hard when we see things like that. But it's also that just reminds you to never put too much hope. and love into like a celebrity, I guess. Yeah. um Like I think growing up, you know, you think these, you know, these are, i guess, idols. Like yeah you they are someone you look up to and you follow what they're doing and they're iconic and you, and you just want to be them basically.
00:23:39
Speaker
um And when they kind of disappoint you by not speaking up about, pride anymore or like literally like the bar is so low too like literally just happy pride like yeah and we didn't get that um right what is it Bud Light can do that so why can't you that's true like sorry like do it this year I mean probably not I mean sorry yeah that's a bad example but yeah a lot of the corporations pulled out, um, this year.
00:24:07
Speaker
So shocker, sad. It was, it was very sad this year too. But anyways, Taylor Swift being such an important part of our lives. Um, We actually got engaged at the Heirs Tour. i Every time I say Heirs Tour now, I say like Heirs of Trish Tour.
00:24:24
Speaker
At the Heirs Tour. um Just the Heirs Tour. Taylor Swift. oh Wait, which better? Heirs of Trish or the Heirs Tour?
00:24:35
Speaker
Oh my God. Okay, remember, you're tilting your head again. Sorry. Which is better, the Heirs Tour or the Heirs of Trish Tour? um The Heirs of Trish Tour?
00:24:47
Speaker
No. is' the Oh, God. You can't ask me that. You'll to make a Patreon. well You can answer on the Patreon. i guess That's what Mistress does. Yeah, if you guys would sign up for a Patreon. and I can't do that to people. that We just started. i want to get you canceled.
00:25:02
Speaker
and like I just can't answer that because both things mean so much to me. But at the Ares tour, Taylor Swift, um here in Nashville, Nashville Night 2, this man right here proposed to me, surprised me, and he had all of her family and friends show up at our house afterwards to do a little engagement party.
00:25:23
Speaker
Actually, I put up um this because I had Taylor Swift on the on the list, and I was like, like how what do I have Taylor-related? a picture of that too like take a picture and put it up on the screen oh yes i can do that because it's a little if it's small well and and yeah i'll do that and then i'll also put our video right here of our engagement and as much as i love her too it just felt like this is something i want nick to remember forever i want everything he loves to be a part of experience for him
00:25:56
Speaker
um In case you didn't already watch it, it was on a national media platform. And yeah, so actually our video, our video of us getting engaged um was actually picked up by...
00:26:11
Speaker
Time Magazine for Taylor Swift's Time Person of the Year article. um And we were interviewed um by ah reporter at Time and they put us in the online article version. So if you go to Taylor's Time Person of the Year um online, there's a video there where we talk about um our engagement, our love for Taylor and what that was like for you planning it.
00:26:36
Speaker
Stressful. So felt like a straight. Yeah. during that entire planning process. Absolutely. Because I just was like, what if the ring sets off the metal detector and how will I remember what line to go down on with my knee?
00:26:53
Speaker
like That's crazy. all of them I help him with anything big pretty much. I'm very needy. He had to go to my sister for everything, I think, for this one, right? Literally go support Sammy K Music like because I don't think I would be married to you without her help. oh my That day was like,
00:27:11
Speaker
I don't know. And i I was like oddly calm. It was just a mix of like all the emotions because I knew you'd say yes. That part I wasn't worried about. It was just like, I was afraid i was going to lose the ring. I think I kept checking my pockets like every five minutes.
00:27:24
Speaker
I don't know if that's if because I cared a lot or if I have OCD, we still, you know, the verdict's still out on that one, but, uh, maybe, maybe a mix of the two.
00:27:35
Speaker
um but yeah your sister was definitely like my emotional support she had like told we everybody like in front of us and behind us what was gonna happen yeah so that they knew and so we had like video uh recordings from like every angle i'm still friends with the girl behind us which is ah the like perfect angle that ended up being on time on the time so i love that we're still hanging out um which is honestly part of like why to like Trish. See, I'm doing it too. But like Taylor is an incredible songwriter. I don't think you can deny that no matter what you think about her. I mean, it's phenomenal.
00:28:13
Speaker
ah That said, I think what I love so much about Taylor Swift culture is the fandom. I get that. Yeah, there's the toxicity. There's a little bit of the cringe, whatever. But like the support that I felt in that moment like when I got down on one knee is like we felt like celebrities and like we were walking out of the stadium and like people just kept coming up to us like congratulations I'm like beyond that how they see it was like so kind and like so oh yeah there's just so much love in the air yeah especially like I don't know. Like I get that a lot of people probably just like drove down or flew or whatever. Like, I don't know where everyone in those stands were from, but like here we are a queer couple in the South presenting our love story in the South and Nashville, Tennessee. And to just have that support yeah in the stadium as we were walking home, getting picked up by your dad. Thank you, Bill. Well, and it was so healing me as well to, to, I feel like our inner child's because like,
00:29:09
Speaker
I don't know. i think we're always scared. so i mean, not always, but sometimes we're scared to hold hands in public. because We still are. We've gotten a lot better about Because I think we see things online and it's like, you know. Stuff can happen. Yeah. Well, I think there's a lot of kids out there that need to see that, you know. Absolutely. um And then that every time I see something online about like a kid, like something awful happens because they come out and their parents are not accepting.
00:29:35
Speaker
Like, you know what? We need to hold hands to one, protest these crazy people and two, to be an example. um But yeah, being in that, you're right, that stadium and all the love we felt is just so healing because yeah, I had never pictured myself being so public about, you know,
00:29:55
Speaker
being gay, I guess. um And we were flying our flag that night. It was it was fun. um And even just like having my family, like I invited everyone to be there. There are people there that I don't think I was expecting to see too. And like, I mean, whether or not they'll watch your podcast, I can say this. It's like I have a lot of political disagreements with my family for sure But just have like that one moment and then even at our wedding because they all came to the wedding to like, yeah,
00:30:22
Speaker
I wish we could see eye to eye on more, but like they're here and they're supporting my love story and me being authentically myself after it was suppressed for so long. Yeah. um ah yeah And I don't know, the older I get, the more I'm like, I don't even think it's about.
00:30:40
Speaker
I mean, I'm very i don't know how to say it right. It's hard to find the words like I'm gay, obviously. Wow. Shocker. I would have to be with a man like that's evident, but just like I feel like when people meet us, it's like, it's not even about that anymore.
00:30:54
Speaker
Like I do have like this. Oh yeah. Right. To you without getting too woo woo for the audience members. But just like, I would hope that people can see our interactions together. Maybe they get to know us for like a week or two.
00:31:07
Speaker
then it's like, how can you not support that anymore? Right. It's not about gender at that point. It's just like, we just have such a great connection. Yeah. That's like meant to be, I don't know what else to say about it. You know?
00:31:19
Speaker
I agree. Yeah. Sorry. That's beautiful. It's crashing out just a tad. Hey, this is the place to do it. Anything else about Taylor Swift we want to talk about? but I guess just like, girl, we need reputation.
00:31:31
Speaker
i don't know all the Swifties out there. i know there's a lot of crossover, I think, with the Trisha fans and Swifties. um It's just such a girly and gay thing to be into, you know? i don't So um if y'all are out there and you're supporter or you're Swiftie, yeah.
00:31:46
Speaker
Let us know. Is Reputation coming? Have you guys heard anything? Because I haven't been in the loop. So maybe I'm crazy. Maybe she said something already or maybe. i thought it was already kind of determined that she wasn't going to release it.
00:31:57
Speaker
Which like. Don't say that. Because I need it. I need it too. Like I will say this. Like I it was not a Swifty until I met you. i think you can verify. But I got really, really close when Reputation came out because I had this incredible.
00:32:11
Speaker
incredible swifty friend in college named Kaylee. oh he was like, you need to listen to reputation. um Don't do a deep dive on me too much. Cause I do remember like writing a whole blog post about how, like, like, look what you made me do is like anti-Christian or something. Justin went to, it was, it was a different era.
00:32:31
Speaker
my that's the running joke for hi i'm justin and i went to indiana westland but the reality is like i wanted to hate that so hard because i loved it so much and i feel like it was like i couldn't deny that i was gay at that point oh yeah yeah and so like when i look back and i like i felt myself understanding what it meant to be a swifty when reputation came out even though i was trying to reject it like i couldn't And so because of that, I just want it to like come out bigger and better than before. Yes.
00:33:01
Speaker
But also I understand what that album's about. And if she doesn't release it, I'm not going to be, I'm going to, I'm going to understand. Yeah. I, well, yeah, exactly. Cause that's the whole thing is what it's about because it's about her ex.
00:33:18
Speaker
Um, and I'm sure that's hard to dive back into all those songs and relive all those memories and those moments. And, And I think what she would probably try to do is try to think of, you know, Travis as, you know, the guy she's singing about now and this time around. But I'm sure that's like impossible. wonder if it's something that you could do like five years down the road. And maybe this is me being naive, but I'm also like thinking of all all my exes.
00:33:42
Speaker
And I'm like, I could sing about him still. Like, I just feel like at this point, I mean, granted, I was the heartbreaker in almost every single situation. Oh, here we go. But like, I'm over it, you know?
00:33:54
Speaker
Yeah. And I like i think I'm songs, but again, i get, I think it's just still fresh. I think it's still, well, most your exes were mainly women. Also true. So yeah, the stakes were low. That was like a different situation.
00:34:09
Speaker
That's called overcompensating a little, I think. Um, My brain. Season where are you at Yeah. Amazon Prime, better announce that soon or going pissed. I'm going to unsubscribe.
00:34:22
Speaker
um Okay. Well, we talked about Taylor. What else do we want to get into today? I do think you just to to talk a little bit more about Taylor, like talk a little bit more about your perspective. What was it like? So sorry.
00:34:35
Speaker
When I proposed to you in that moment, we're like, duh, knew he was going to do this. Like when else would he have done it? Okay. Yes. Yes. um So leading up to the engagement, I honestly had no idea was going to happen. I swear to God, I think.
00:34:53
Speaker
People just say like think I'm like lying, but i I'm really not. I think it crossed my mind a couple of times. But up to that concert, there was a lot going on in life. And I don't really remember what, but I wasn't thinking about it.
00:35:06
Speaker
If that makes sense. um I was just excited that Taylor was in town. And that's all I was thinking about was like, OK, I got to go get the merch because i went early that day to go get Taylor's merch when the merch truck arrived.
00:35:19
Speaker
um Got the blue crew neck. If you know, you know. And um i felt really um just like, Excited to relive my Swifty days, I guess, and to have you and my sister there because I had went to the first Ares tour stop in Glendale. I was there night two.
00:35:39
Speaker
um And then I saw Taylor again in Nashville on night one. And then night two was when we went together. So, yeah, I think I i wasn't really thinking much of it.
00:35:50
Speaker
um And when you got down on your knee during Love Story and you tapped me on the shoulder, ah was like, I was absolutely shocked. And thinking about it, it like makes me feel a little emotional because it was just like,
00:36:08
Speaker
the perfect It was just the moment when I was like, how did i get so lucky, you know? And how did I end up with this sweet guy who didn't... He's not a huge Taylor fan, but he's like making our... i mean, he was. he is now.
00:36:24
Speaker
But like, at the time, not probably so much. And like, he made our entire engagement centered around Taylor Swift and my favorite artist. I mean, how sweet is that? um I mean, and it's so...
00:36:37
Speaker
it was tailored to like what I wanted. I feel like, you know what i mean? And like, you know, what you buy. home my god aye Yeah. I, I'm trying not to ruin the moment. I started with compliments, but it's like, I propose and you're like, Oh my God, I'm so lucky. And then like the next week you're like, Oh my God, like he's, he's like obsessed with dad jokes. What have I done? no, no.
00:37:03
Speaker
No, I um yeah, it was a good time. It was a great day. It was like the best day my life. I mean, second to the wedding now because the wedding was the best day of my life, which is so cheesy and so annoying to say that. Is that true, though? Because I feel like I've asked you and I was like, what's like your favorite moment of all time? And you're like being at the big Broadway dream.
00:37:25
Speaker
Which I don't take that personally. i No, no, no, no Listen, that's not, I think that's one of the best days of my life. I say that all the time. i don't say that's the best day of my life.
00:37:37
Speaker
The best day of my life is the wedding day. Okay. It's really cheesy and corny to say that. Listen, I get it But it was just, we had a great wedding and we had a lot of just like support and love and it was all just love. And we had a drag queen perform at our wedding, which.
00:37:55
Speaker
Cindy her on the 4th July. Shout out obscenity. She actually was at play on Friday night when we went out to see mistress Isabel Brooks. Um, and she is a Reba impersonator. So, ah we just announced her as a Reba impersonator because some of, i don't know if your family's weird about drag queens or not, but I told you, right? Like it was like the week after, like one of my cousins was like,
00:38:21
Speaker
You did know that was a like a man, right? Or like something. You remember? You did say that. Yeah. Like, I mean, I got some some crap for it. It was worth it. I mean, yeah I get lots of that's crazy in my family. But I mean, it's the same thing as like holding hands. Like, I'm sorry, if you're gonna be in my space, like you're gonna play by my rules.
00:38:41
Speaker
And I'm going to show you that like, we're all normal. It's like, and it's crazy when you come from that like strict Christian background too. Cause like I took classes, um, loved loved the program, honestly, incredible professors I will look up to forever. But there were just a couple moments where,
00:39:00
Speaker
um And I had this one class called what is beauty, which is also like very, I mean, we can dissect that on its own, but there's like a week or two where we were like talking about how like art had become like sexually perverted or something.
00:39:13
Speaker
And it's just like crazy that like, what is just completely normal and just human expression is something that like people have been brainwashed into thinking is just this like horrific use of.
00:39:28
Speaker
Wait, how did we get to this point? Sorry. Like just like, what are we talking about? The way that like the church, AKA fa looks at drag Queens and yeah the gay community right and the perversion they think is perverted or they think it's sexual. Immediately equate it to like sexual perversion.
00:39:45
Speaker
Yeah. Drag is just expression and a guy dancing around in a dress. You guys. That's what i I showed them. Like, it's literally them singing Reba. Everyone at my wedding loved Reba, whether they were conservative.
Mental Health Advocacy & Medication Journey
00:39:56
Speaker
Right. Reba's one of those people that everyone loves, like Dolly. Like Dolly. I think it's weird how drag queens are looked at like that. um Yeah. Political climate, once again. Sorry to keep bringing up the politics of it all, but it's important to our story. It's because I'm here, too. Yeah.
00:40:11
Speaker
Oh, I mean, look at your shirt. i' I'm a social worker. It just happens, guys. Yes. Also, congratulations. said oh do where so sorry Did We already did. I know. i'm I got a new job. um You can probably tell How's it going?
00:40:24
Speaker
There's light in my eyes again. I'm still behind on school. But like before, it was because I didn't have time to do my schoolwork. That's true. And now it's because I have time to be with you, and I'd rather be with you. yeah Not to like put that pressure on you.
00:40:36
Speaker
um Well, most of the time you're doing homework anyways, but yeah i mean we still try to find time to say hi. I think my meds still aren't working. I don't know. i just can't focus on school. It's it's a struggle bus.
00:40:47
Speaker
Your meds, meaning your ADHD meds? Yeah. You're going to need to talk to your psychiatrist about that. might just get a new psychiatrist. Just that's not. Is that not healthy? Is that not the right? No.
00:40:59
Speaker
Well, are they are they are they not listening to you? No, I just feel like if I like say I'm struggling, they'll like. They just said something like wanting to keep me in the same like family of drugs Well, that's okay. feel like you just probably want to try something different. just really want to try Vyvanse because you like it. But again, maybe I'm built different. I did the whole genetic test thing, but I just kind of don't know. You know what? The medication process is so hard and grueling.
00:41:24
Speaker
And especially when stimulants get involved, they kind of act like you're going to try to sell them out to people or you're addicted or something yeah but um i think you should just see what the doctor has to say yeah because if they'll try you on something different yeah then that's good that's all that matters right because also if this next thing doesn't work in this family of drugs then they might try you on something different you're right meaning vivence or adderall or whatever just gotta stay the course it's rough i get why people don't stick with it you know what mean yeah
00:41:57
Speaker
Because it's like you have to try all these meds that might not work. I finally went on that journey side effects and all that stuff. But when you find the one that works like I know and I'm just waiting. and like Yeah. Yeah. I finally went on that journey. I think I started in November of last year and just my last psychiatry appointment.
00:42:13
Speaker
We said, all right, I'm feeling good. And now we don't have to meet for three months instead of monthly, which was, you know, very expensive and awful. But yeah. Worth it because I am doing a lot better. So, yay. i We're both thriving. Shout out mental illness. Shout out depression. Shout out anxiety. Shout out ADHD.
00:42:31
Speaker
Shout out OCD. Shout out BPD. have all the things. Well, we don't have BPD, but like couple shout out BPD. Oh, absolutely. lot of our followers have BPD.
00:42:43
Speaker
And Trisha does. Yeah. So, shout out. I just feel like... Again, like the labels are so important. It's like the same with like the queer community, right? Because like, I'm not going to tell people that you have to either fit in the gay box or the lesbian box.
00:42:57
Speaker
Yeah, right right. That's probably a good thing. all All of the letters because they're all different and they represent like who we are. But then I do think like, and sorry, I'm trying to lead this back to like the mental.
00:43:10
Speaker
They're not mental illnesses. What are they called? They're, shoot. I learned about this. Social worker. I'm a social worker. Give me a second. They're just like, it's, I can't think of the word, but they're just different. It's disability? No. not a disability either. Like, it's just like, our brains are just built different.
00:43:28
Speaker
So if I go onto Google right now and say, what are ADHD, OCD? They're going to say built different. AI now. So that's going to whatever you want want to see. But, um, I think it depends. I would say ADHD is something that's like being built different.
00:43:44
Speaker
I think a lot of the ones you listed are like that. But as someone with depression, I would say, okay, depression is like an illness. Like it just depends like are there strengths that come with it? If so, like it's just something that makes you different.
00:43:57
Speaker
And then if it's something like makes your life harder and there's not really like a silver lining is an illness. that's That's how I characterize it. You can call them mental illnesses or mental health disorders.
00:44:10
Speaker
I disagree. Those things aren't negative, honey. Those aren't negative connotations. it just It just means you've got something that makes your brain different than a neurotypical brain. Neurodivergent? Is that what you were trying to think mean, neurodivergent like the umbrella. There's a word I'm looking for that i can't think of. but base Disorder?
00:44:27
Speaker
Not that one. No, baby. um It's just... ah
00:44:34
Speaker
I hope it comes to you because I'm very confused. Condition. ah Maybe that's it. There we go. Mental condition. not sure, but we'll go with it. But like some people might say I have a mental illness. I like to call it my superpower.
00:44:46
Speaker
i love that. No, no, you have been on this lately. Yeah. Because I get so frustrated sometimes with my ADHD. Like every day I'm looking for my keys. Yeah. I mean, even with the medications, like get the medications don't fix everything. Like my memory is still awful.
00:45:02
Speaker
um But I'm like constantly looking for my keys, constantly trying to remember where I am and who I am and where the hell I'm, what I'm doing. um And I just get so frustrated and upset by that.
00:45:13
Speaker
um I'm like, Oh, I wish I was born without ADHD. I hate having these issues. My brain just worked normally. Like, cause you just, it's a lot of work to like understand how your brain works. And then, you know, like i was watching videos on how to organize your house to make sure you have good systems. and talk about Who was it? Um, that put everything in a little box.
00:45:38
Speaker
Huh? Like it was like a Netflix show back in like 2016, 2017. No, that's what we're talking about. Organizing homes or what is it? or name no um I don't know. But yeah, they were just talking about how you should like if you leave all your paint supplies out on your couch, like put a put a little box by your coffee table. I may have already talked about this on the podcast. I don't know.
00:45:56
Speaker
I don't remember it. We du we talked about in the living room. i remember that. ah The word I was looking for is diagnosis. So I'm diagnosed, but I don't have a disorder. and if anyone wants to come me, you can. But like that's just like my personal... Okay. If that's what makes you feel good, then that's good. And as someone that's a social worker, I would never... like But don't say that....someone adhere to that okay good framework. But for me, in my personal life, that's what helps me like wake up each day.
00:46:20
Speaker
Because ah you don't want to feel like you have something wrong with you. I'm okay if there's something wrong with me, but I also just feel like, especially sorry to get political again. Like when there's politicians trying to say that like all people with autism should like be put in a concentration camp.
00:46:34
Speaker
Um, who said that? I'll give you three guesses. Like the one with brain worms. Oh, okay. That was my third guess. okay So, um, but like concentration camps, not word for word, but basically, I thought it was a database.
00:46:51
Speaker
same thing they wanted to create a database which could lead to that is what you're saying is what we got to break it down for people because everyone could go this guy's crazy because he's saying which is fine call me crazy concentration camps but I get it I get what you're saying yeah it's just like which the database thing is insane Yeah, no, absolutely. And ah but sorry, yeah, to to simplify to break it down.
00:47:14
Speaker
It's just like when when people are trying to come for people with disabilities, and and make those communities look lesser than I find it important to bring us up. And maybe there is a biological component to some of these diagnoses that like, does make life harder because like,
00:47:33
Speaker
Having generalized anxiety sucks. Having depression sucks. I'm sure there's a lot of other disorders out there that are probably even worse than what I deal with. So anyway, if you have a mental illness out there, yes, mental illness, um we support you. We love you. We accept you. We have a lot of them here. um There's a lot represented here on the screen now. So um anyways, um let us know what meds you're on.
00:47:57
Speaker
And my god let us know if you're um doing well because we want you to be well. I am on a new medication. Also, if you're struggling. oh give me one second. You're good. If you're struggling out there, hardcore.
00:48:11
Speaker
And you need to crash out. Call the hot girl crash out. Okay, no we're not going to monetize. Well, I don't think we make money from this. We don't. but We don't make any money. We're not psychiatrists.
00:48:24
Speaker
I would have to get my doctorate for that. So if you have a serious concern, please call ah psychiatrist or health professional Otherwise, you can crash out with us.
00:48:38
Speaker
Ew. As a little disclaimer. I'm trying to protect us legally. No, I appreciate that. I was looking up current pop culture moments online. i thought you were saying I was ew. No, just what I just read was ew.
00:48:49
Speaker
Most things in the world today are. You're right. Let's not even read it because it's not even interesting. Is it? i know you go ahead. and What were going to say? I was just going to say I'm on a new medication that's not related to mental wellness. Okay, so it's for hair loss.
00:49:02
Speaker
Wow. c I mean, I was going to say it, but yeah. So Justin's... Well, do we want to... You can just put all my ish out. I mean, why not? We're here hanging out. brought up. We're all besties. Guys, Justin's barber nicked him.
00:49:15
Speaker
And then two months later, the hair still never grew back. The barber gave me alopecia. No, you had alopecia, and then the barber just unveiled it. Is that how alopecia... So have I always had alopecia? No, because that's confusing to me. Because alopecia means that your body is my under attacking your hair follicles. I thought she nicked me. Well, she need to remember to take the medication, by the way.
00:49:37
Speaker
Sorry. I'll do it before I go to bed tonight. um It's like a little topical ointment. And it was crazy, too, because I went to the dermatologist finally. Might as well just show your hole.
00:49:48
Speaker
Not your hole, your you're spot. You can show them a picture. i don't know Will it show up? you can Yeah, just do a quick little... is great reveal.
00:49:59
Speaker
Guys, it's big. make sure Guys, it's big. Yes, I can see it. I'm so far away, the screen is this small and I can see the hole. It's not even a hole anymore, it's more like a gaping hole but um but no there is reporting now we'll report back later justin does have some little blondie hairs growing out because he went to the dermatologist like i told him to like stabbed me in the head well you needed it we are pro vaccine here too it wasn't a vaccine it was yeah what else would it be it was a needle steroid isn't oh okay sorry i took science classes right all needles are vaccines you think my glp1's a vaccine
00:50:42
Speaker
I would have said yes, but... I guess I never came out about that yet on the intert internet. Oh, shit. I mean, you can cut this. um I mean, I won't. I'm getting skinny, guys. I don't care.
00:50:53
Speaker
we don't need to talk about it. um Everyone, use my code at roe.com. Nickgetsskinny.com. If you do keep this in. We're not.
00:51:03
Speaker
I'm not sponsored by Roe, but Roe, call me. were Were you at all influenced by Trisha and Oscar's sponsorships? No. and Maybe.
00:51:15
Speaker
But you you went through a different company, right? Yes, because it's just so expensive everywhere. But Roe, I haven't. i'm um I actually submitted a like. they're going to check my insurance to see if it would work.
00:51:27
Speaker
Okay. Because I always just thought my insurance wouldn't work. Um, and, and Oscar just said that he, when he got on row, he always thought his insurance wouldn't work either. And then they were able to make it work somehow. So, um, that's crazy. I just got an ad and,
00:51:45
Speaker
for him and hers weight loss plans um anyways yeah i've lost 50 pounds and um thanks to that bound well um we talked about everything yeah right that we want to talk about today any other hot topics you had in your mind obviously there's a lot of hot topics going on in the world we kind of just talk about what we want to talk about i guess um And what we' what's on our mind. we did up We did a little short bashing of the 4th of July, but i do you want to put more emphasis on the fact that Kesha is officially free and her album is incredible. I think it's very important. Yes. Congratulations, Miss Kesha.
00:52:25
Speaker
Period. Period is out. We have tickets to see her in Nashville. We'll be in the pit. And... and Justin's been really listening to it a lot lately. So tell us about the album. What do you think of it? The whole album's good.
00:52:37
Speaker
For whatever reason, I'm just fixated on freedom.
Kesha's Freedom & Listener Dilemmas
00:52:41
Speaker
I'll get through the rest of the album like for multiple listen-throughs here in a bit. But that that one just rubs something in my brain. Scratches it.
00:52:48
Speaker
Good. Scratches it. um There's like this like little beat in it where it's like... but but like It's so simple. but it like it's There's something it reminds me of from 2010-ish.
00:53:05
Speaker
Nostalgic music? Kind of like that early Like a Black Eyed Peas kind of vibe. It's almost like the beat is a clicker that's making me have to dance it.
00:53:14
Speaker
like the b is like ah clicker that's like making me have to dance to it It's like I'm like being mind-controlled by the song because it's that good. oh what Okay, got it. you know The clicker thing kind of threw me off.
00:53:31
Speaker
like Because the beat's like... ah um but And that's like someone being you know Oh, like a remote control. Every time they hit from the remote control, I have to be like this. Okay, got it. i see yeah Sorry. i i might breathe. And a little motion, a little dance.
00:53:45
Speaker
I love that. You got to keep up because it's midnight and I'm unmedicated today. What are your thoughts on Kesha? Oh, well, I've And period. Well, we saw Kesha last year at We Hope Pride and it was an amazing performance. It was like the first time she stepped on stage and she said, I'm officially out of my contract with Dr. Luke.
00:54:08
Speaker
And i was just like, it was so cool to be there for that. um She's an incredible performer. I'm so excited to see her again live. If she's coming to your city, y'all better listen. I'm really pissed off, though.
00:54:21
Speaker
I know what you're going to say, but like talk about it. Call them out. so something that went viral recently, um
00:54:31
Speaker
these boring, bland people. What why are they called? Granola Girls? with Giving Granola, giving honesty and MAGA America a little bit. yeah um In this video, we're recording themselves being like, Kesha's concert is so boring.
00:54:50
Speaker
right It was something like that. Kesha's concert is boring. I didn't expect to be bored. um and All I have to say to these people is there's literally you are absolutely lying because I have seen Kesha live.
00:55:04
Speaker
I've heard that this concert is incredible. Kesha's coming back for the first time with a new album. No longer under contract with Dr. Luke. Obviously, it's going to be good. i don't even have to go see the show to know that these people are absolutely delusional.
00:55:19
Speaker
But I can't wait. July 15th, we'll let you know if they were delusional or not because um I don't know why it went viral either. Why did it get so much attention? sometimes Sometimes TikTok just... and wow Random things just go viral. And I guess there's a lot of haters out there too, probably. and People were coming for Katy Perry, which I will say I thought was valid because I disagreed with of things that she was doing. space what?
00:55:41
Speaker
with the space thing. And then like people kind of came for her like concert after, cause it was like kind of cringe. Oh yeah. There was like AI in the screen all over. there is Yeah. Just a lot of issues with it, word and but like, I don't know. And, and I haven't seen Kesha's tour, but I've seen her last one and it was a show and she's phenomenal and a queen.
00:56:01
Speaker
All right, guys. It is now time for the Hot Girl Crashing Out Hotline. You know, we promote it lot, we say it a lot, but we're finally getting to listen to some calls. So
Relationship Advice Segment
00:56:12
Speaker
let's do it. Okay, let's see what we got.
00:56:14
Speaker
Nip, I'm here and I'm about to crash out, or I'm gonna tell you something I've been crashing out about recently. So, maybe like a year or ago, I met this dude and was hanging out with him He just got a relationship probably a few months prior. We're hanging out. We got to the point where saying we love each other and then I want to try to take the next step and make it official, right?
00:56:37
Speaker
As one would do. But he's like, no, no, no, no. I don't want to do this. And I'm like, well, you've been showing me otherwise this whole, these whole months that we've been hanging out, going out, like you've been buying me food, buying me drinks, buying me gifts for my birthday, everything. Buying me flowers just for the, just because.
00:56:57
Speaker
And then I deleted him off everything, blocked him. And then the whole time, um Apparently, he's been trying to get in touch with me saying how sorry he is and how he should have never did that.
00:57:12
Speaker
So a few years passed, like two years maybe, and I go to this music festival. two Well, guess who I randomly see there? Three hours away from his hometown, which is in my hometown.
00:57:26
Speaker
Would never expect to see him, so I think it's fate. So yell his name. I'm like, bleep. come here and then he can sees me and we like talk chatted up and he's like yeah you've had me blocked but i've been trying to get in touch with you to tell you how sorry i am and how like all this and that right wow and it's been going i have a boyfriend now but like me and my boyfriend are not in the best place we're not similar at all we share nothing like in our values or anything like that and i'm just wanting your advice on
00:57:59
Speaker
Should I leave my current boyfriend to try to pursue this relationship that could have been so good? i just, I just, add I'm torn. I'm torn. I don't know.
00:58:12
Speaker
I really, i can't, and not a day goes by that I do not think about this dude and I just don't know what to do I feel stuck and would love some advice on it. So if you could just give me some advice, that'd be great. Love you.
00:58:27
Speaker
and Everyone watching, I love you too. And kisses. Oh my God. Okay. Wow. I love that this is becoming not love line. I was going to say this saved the same thing. Listen, say when we made the crash out ah hot girl but but when we created the hot girl crash out hotline, I purposely made it very vague.
00:58:47
Speaker
Crash out about anything. Wow. Wow. I don't even know if you were to start with that. printley Well, before we answer it, I just want to say thank you for calling and sharing this with us.
00:59:00
Speaker
I can feel the emotion in your words. like It kind of made me want to cry. a because house i mean just like I appreciate you for coming on here and like also like trusting me with this advice and stuff like that because that's wild. yeah um you know Take our advice with a grain of salt. Absolutely.
00:59:21
Speaker
we We personally in the gay dating scene, we both both don't have a whole lot of experience. I don't think that is because we found each other pretty quickly and we're very lucky because there's so many people in the gay community, queer community, whatever that are struggling to find, you know, their soulmate or whatever. yeah um But OK, can we go through this again?
00:59:42
Speaker
So he. Was with somebody they were basically leading him on like two or three years ago. yeah you know, treating him right, buying him lunch, getting him gifts.
00:59:54
Speaker
And then he goes to make it official. Yeah. And he's like, the other guy's like cringed out by it. Basically he wasn't ready to make it official. And so our friend, which we, we don't have his name, unfortunately.
01:00:06
Speaker
and don't think he said it. Oh yeah. Um, that's okay. But i he um, he, blocked him because i think things went down probably yeah there. And as you do, and like,
01:00:20
Speaker
that's kind of frustrating when you're in a relationship, I'm sure. And you know, you're being led to believe that things are more serious than they are. um and this person has commitment issues. It sounds like, or at least they did a couple of years ago. yeah Um, and then two years later, he says music festival meets him and sees him again, I guess.
01:00:47
Speaker
And, uh, He's like, hey, I've been trying to reach out to you. I'm sorry for everything. Damn. And he's dating somebody that he's not totally into or like they're not vibing.
01:00:58
Speaker
Yeah. Well, my advice right off the bat, you can give yours. Sure. No, you go first. cause that' was like This is my first call and I really just want to give you got this give like what I'm feeling here. From what it sounded like in your voice, your current boyfriend is not the one.
01:01:15
Speaker
I think if you were dating somebody and you knew that it was possible that they were the one, you know what I mean? You wouldn't, you wouldn't say that, right? Like, I don't know. So anyways, like, what did he say about the, this current? values are different. Their values are different. That's huge. huge I mean, that could yeah be anything from political to just like, you know, daily life things, but like values, you, they have to align somewhat to make that work. So yeah.
01:01:44
Speaker
I think my advice is for you to break up with your current boyfriend because your values don't align, right? That's like a normal thing. That's unfortunately a sad reality. I would say, yeah, if that's like something that like you're pretty sure of. And I think for me,
01:02:04
Speaker
i i would maybe just say like, don't feel like it has to be like one or the other. Yeah. I don't want to be like, there's plenty of fish in this. Well, and I was just like, take this and, and not think about this other guy right now. That's where I'm at. your boyfriend, you said you don't have values that align. Don't be with him just to be with somebody, I guess.
01:02:22
Speaker
is what I'm trying to say. yeah um So don't even worry about the other guy in all of that. I think, you know, whether you decide to talk to this other guy or not, like, I think things should probably end with this guy. unless I mean, unless there's things we don't understand. I feel like compartmentalize, like, because it's also like saying that you shouldn't leave someone for someone else doesn't mean that you're saying no to the other person. I think it's just like, yeah, you need to think like step one without considering any other factors is am I happy in this relationship? Do I see this long term?
01:02:52
Speaker
Do I want to stay in this relationship? And if all of those questions are answered and you're like, okay, no, I have to leave. That's the answer. And then the next step is like, okay, am I ready for a new relationship or do I need time to like heal and process?
01:03:07
Speaker
And if you're like, no, I feel ready. Then that's like when you can start being like, okay, like I, is this guy genuinely, actually sorry yeah and has he actually changed and time has bit gone on since that yeah first time they met so yeah i would say first decide if you want to be with your current boyfriend or not i say probably break up with them um that's the vibe but yeah but second step obviously do what you want but also that's my advice yeah um with the context we have yeah and then the second thing to do I think there is to make sure you don't have any strings attached or like make sure you're not like still in love with your current boyfriend make sure like you're ready to move on and then maybe see about the situation with this other guy I think after time has gone on like yeah put your
01:03:53
Speaker
toes in the water and see what what it is. If you get any red flags, just immediately you know probably take a step back. right and that's the direction we're going, I would say like just make sure that you're going slow and you don't like try to put too much into it. It seemed like they were vibing hardcore before. I think a lot of gay people have commitment issues yeah and they need to work through like some childhood trauma before they can do all that and they just weren't ready to settle down. but maybe yeah Maybe he's ready. so I never had commitment issues.
01:04:23
Speaker
So I say, I say maybe break up with your current boyfriend and then work on yourself, like make sure you're ready and then maybe go into this with the other guy, you know, get your feel for what he's like now and he red flags and then, but don't go through all of that with the hopes that you're going to end up with this guy.
01:04:48
Speaker
Because at the end of it, he could just be an asshole still. You know what i mean? But maybe he's not. But maybe he's not. Maybe he's ready to commit. And at the end of the day, also love yourself. And like, exact don't settle.
01:04:59
Speaker
Because like,
01:05:02
Speaker
Because like ultimately what we're looking for is someone that's willing to commit, but also in that, make sure that they're still giving you the the drinks and the gifts and the things yeah because you deserve that. And there's so much more to a relationship than all that even. like You think about like what are your personal goals in life and like is that person going to push you and ah root for you with all of those dreams you have? so um And think about that with your current boyfriend. Is he that kind of person or is this other guy that kind of person? Do you think he would fill that role for you?
01:05:30
Speaker
um You got to be selfish when it comes to relationships, guys. You can't just. know one talks about that, but it's so true. Well, you got to be selfish. But then you also on the flip side of that, you have to be able to look through some things that it might annoy you about a person.
01:05:45
Speaker
You know what i mean? I think every relationship, the other ah one person is going to like that. My man is so annoying in this way or whatever. You lost me there. I don't know. I'm just so perfect.
01:05:55
Speaker
Yeah. Oh, I thought you were going to say I'm perfect. ah um But anyways, thanks for your call. That was so sweet. I'm so glad you called. And if, yeah, i love relationship advice, I love it. You know, we'll give our best shot at it. And no matter what you decide and no matter what happens, like you've got this because I feel like even though like we, like you said, like we both got lucky, like you weren't in the dating scene.
01:06:17
Speaker
that long relative to other people. I think we both really had a hard time with it. Yeah. I mean, i didn't date for a long time. It's a hard time. It's a hard life out there. i wasn't in out of the closet when we met.
01:06:27
Speaker
um Yeah. But you've got this. That's a whole other episode. um Okay. Let's get into the next call. Wow. That was a great first one. i don't know if this could be added to my last call or not about the dude that I'm currently with versus whether I should be with the dude that I really want to be with.
01:06:45
Speaker
But I just had to add some more stuff in to give you more context. Thank you. This dude and me would literally have the perfect relationship. I just know it.
01:06:56
Speaker
And somebody beat down for me so hard for this long when I'm in a relationship. It's like they're waiting for me. And that's really all had add.
01:07:12
Speaker
My advice remains the same. Yeah. But also say love that context because
01:07:21
Speaker
for you to say you think he's been waiting for you like that, that brings it to a whole other level. And that's more like how I used to, all i earlier I said like, put your toes in there. He might have red flags. It sounds like, you know,
01:07:34
Speaker
yeah, he's had issues in the past, but maybe now maybe now things could be better because he's been waiting this long and he's like trying to probably improve himself you know and be better for that to work out. so yeah The fact that you called back too, and then it's like...
01:07:50
Speaker
Just trust your gut. You know what you're doing. Yes, you do know what you're doing. You don't need was going to say, he doesn't need us. He sounds like he's got this under control. Please call back and update us on what's going Yeah, we're going to give you the blue checkmark, that verification. like you're You're doing the right thing.
01:08:06
Speaker
What blue checkmark? That's on Facebook. like verified They're verified. We're verifying that he's on the right track. Okay. Well, thank you for calling in. um I really appreciate it.
01:08:18
Speaker
And again, please call back. Let us know what is going on with the situation because we need to know. All right, everyone, that wraps up our episode today. Thanks for watching the Club Crave podcast.
01:08:30
Speaker
um And again, I'm going to shout it out one more time. Call the hot girl crash out hotline. um Crash out. We'd love to add you to our next call and our future episodes we've got coming up.
01:08:43
Speaker
um We've got some more fun calls ahead next week um and some more hot topics. And then the weeks after that, we've got some guests coming on finally. So, um,
01:08:54
Speaker
Yes, everyone have a great rest of your week. I hope you started off the week well um by watching us and it it helps put you in a good mood. um And we hope you come back next Monday for episode number five.
01:09:08
Speaker
All right. Bye, diva.