Transcript
CHANTELLE KINCY: Hi, welcome to Go Far Girl. Thanks for joining us today. We have a good show for you today and I'm really excited to introduce you to Ayla. Ayla is a photographer, she's a veteran, and she's a studio owner who accidentally turned a work trip into a sisterhood.
CHANTELLE KINCY: What started as business logistics with her all-woman team evolved quickly into something deeper, shared vulnerability, unexpected growth, and an unshakable trust in each other. So Ayla's here to share what happens when you take your team on the road, let go of the plan, and discover that real transformation happens somewhere in the messy middle.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Thanks for hanging out with us today, Ayla. I'm so excited to have you.
Ayla: Of course, like appreciate you having me. I'm so excited. It'll be so much fun.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah, I've been ah reading through your story and I'm like, I've got to dig more into this. And there are some questions I'm going to answer, even though you've said there are things you don't talk about. So ah we got to dig into the juicy details.
Ayla: Yes.
CHANTELLE KINCY: But before we do, I'm just curious, um what is your like number one bucket list travel item or location?
Ayla: So mine has been Scotland for like ever. Um, yeah, I really want to go So we actually are going though. So we released our Scotland destination shoots about a month ago and they booked in five days.
Ayla: Um, so we are going for my birthday next year, next May.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Heck yeah.
Ayla: And I'm so excited because my second one was Iceland and I've gotten to do that one already.
CHANTELLE KINCY: a
Ayla: So now I get to move like top bucket list one.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Oh my gosh. Scotland, this, I could talk about this for weeks. It is like the most, I don't know what is in the air. If it's some sort of like drug or like Scottish spell.
CHANTELLE KINCY: But you just get there and you're there for like two seconds and you're like, yep, this is my favorite place on earth. And then you never stop thinking about it again. like And it's weird that you said Scotland because I don't know what I must have said about Scotland recently.
CHANTELLE KINCY: But for the last week, my entire TikTok has been Scotland. And I'm like, oh my God, I'm about to book a trip. I'm going to do it.
Ayla: telling you you have to go.
CHANTELLE KINCY: I'm about to book a trip. Where are you guys going? All over or just Edinburgh?
Ayla: so are go.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah.
Ayla: We're going to fly into Edim, Edinburgh, Edinburgh.
CHANTELLE KINCY: it's and It's like Edinburgh, but it's its hard.
Ayla: I don't can't. Edinburgh. OK. So we're to fly in there and then we're about two hours east in Inilin, I believe.
Ayla: ah We found a beautiful Airbnb we're going to go to and our clients, this is the first time we're having clients stay with us at the Airbnb.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Okay. Ooh. Ooh.
Ayla: um And then they get half a day of photo shoots at the Airbnb and then all of them booked a package that they get half a day where we go out and find somewhere to photograph. And so they're still working on figuring out where they want to go and everything like that, but we're going to go wherever they want to go and do a bunch of stuff.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Oh my gosh.
Ayla: yeah
CHANTELLE KINCY: ah um I'll send you some really pretty pictures and some cool places that you might want to go to because, oh my gosh.
Ayla: Yes. I would love that.
CHANTELLE KINCY: yeah i could Oh my gosh. We're going to get off to course because you mentioned you did my trigger word
Ayla: me Yes. Oh my gosh. I'm so, so excited to go.
CHANTELLE KINCY: but
Ayla: And I'm worried that I'm going to love it too. And my sister just did a DNA test and she like, she's 30% Scottish.
CHANTELLE KINCY: word.
Ayla: And I'm like, who's 30% Scottish. um So I haven't done mine yet. And I'm like, okay, I get to go. And I know their families from there. So it'll be, it'll be like this whole thing.
CHANTELLE KINCY: If you go to the castle in Edinburgh, they have, um you can see like the crown jewels. And then at the bottom of this like little museum at the at the castle, they have like a genealogy place where if you give them your name, they will look you up and tell you like what clan your family was from.
Ayla: Oh,
CHANTELLE KINCY: And then they'll even like print out like this whole like like official like Scottish decree thing of like, so it's cool.
Ayla: that's so cool.
Ayla: Oh, that's so cool.
CHANTELLE KINCY: But yeah, they'll look up and see like um how, where your, which clan your family originated from, which is really super cool too.
Ayla: Oh, I'll have to, I'll have to do that because I've been trying to do the research and I'm just like, I don't, I don't think I have the time and like the capability to figure it out myself. So I'll have to go in.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah, let them do it girl.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: ah They're into it and it's quicker for them.
Ayla: Yay. Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: So we'll get back on track um maybe for a minute, but I'll probably still like be thinking about cows or something in Scotland, but they call them coos, hairy coos.
Ayla: Oh my gosh.
CHANTELLE KINCY: I love them so much.
Ayla: You're so cute.
CHANTELLE KINCY: So tell me what your life looked like before this trip we're about to talk about. So kind of where you were and then what spurred the trip and then we'll hop into the trip.
Ayla: Yeah.
Ayla: Yeah. So we, um, we i mean i was in the military so i was enlisted in the military had a lot of um i didn't have a great childhood as far as like trauma from a specific parent and then um joined the military and then was in a really abusive relationship got pregnant had my daughter got out of that relationship got out of the military um i was medically retired by them and then um met my current husband and we started at the studio and like the studio i tried for years to get the studio going and didn't really work until he came into the picture and i think he balances me like personality wise um he's very outgoing and i'm very soft-spoken and so i think that helped a lot
CHANTELLE KINCY: Love that.
Ayla: And then we decided we wanted to start doing trips. um So we were, we wanted really to pay for the trips we were going on for like education. um So we go to St. Louis every year um for a photography conference that I speak at. and we wanted to find a way to kind of cover that cost and to pull clients from there. And so we decided to kind of turn it into a work trip.
Ayla: And trying to figure out the logistics of that, you didn't want have to pay for multiple hotel rooms for each of my employees and things like that, but they needed them all to go. And so that kind of made this become a thing where we had to figure out what we were doing.
Ayla: um and each trip has like made the experience even bigger for us.
CHANTELLE KINCY: I love that. So are you taking pictures like on location of places where you travel?
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Like you said, in Scotland, people you're taking pictures there.
Ayla: So depends on where we go. So um like St.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Okay.
Ayla: Louis, we generally will do almost everybody who books there lives in St. Louis. And so they'll just do in the Airbnb kind of like a studio set. And then same thing when we go to Anchorage and places like that, but we've done Vegas and Vegas, they had the option of doing outdoor or indoor. So we did some at the dry lake bed out there.
Ayla: um When we do anything international, we try to do outdoors because when you go international, if you're doing like in an Airbnb, you might as well just stay in the US.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Right.
Ayla: ah Like there's not a lot of places that scream like, oh, I'm in London necessarily that are indoors. So we're doing more fashion outdoors than we are boudoir indoors.
CHANTELLE KINCY: right
Ayla: um So it kind of just depends on where we're going.
CHANTELLE KINCY: That's really cool though, because like when I travel, you see all these great places and you try to get good pictures of yourself in these really iconic places. And they're just like, when you get home, you're like, well, no one's ever going to see that because that does not look the way it did in my head.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: So being able to book something like that and have like a professional handle it for you is actually a really cool like souvenir for a trip. So I love that idea.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: So, okay. So you were just getting going kind of with your studio, starting things out and you booked some kind of crazy like whirlwind.
Ayla: Mm-hmm.
Ayla: Mm-hmm.
CHANTELLE KINCY: New York, Paris, Rome, London, all the things.
Ayla: Yep.
CHANTELLE KINCY: tell me about it.
Ayla: Yep. and So we started with these little small local trips and then my mentor, um, did this destinations unknown trip. So it was a whole bunch of photographers going on this destination trip. And so I decided instead taking my husband, I'm going to take my product advisor with me. Um, so my product advisor, Kat, she loves to travel too. And so we went New York,
Ayla: and then London, and then Paris, and then Rome. It might not have been in that order, but we went to all of them in like two weeks. And so it's me. and And so some places we stayed in a hotel, some places we stayed in an Airbnb, and there were like 20 of us together.
Ayla: um But it really brought me and my product advisor a lot closer and made us like learn little things about each other. And I think it's Like, it was really cool because we were like, okay, well, we really only fought once. And it was just because we were overstimulated.
Ayla: Like, whoever.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah.
Ayla: But then, like, finding each other's thing. And so now we know on trips, like, what she's in charge of and what I'm in charge of. And then, and it just works so much smoother. And it just created, like, and and then bringing in the other staff, too. It just created a much better balance for us and just kind of brought us together. And I don't know. It was just kind of ah weird experience.
CHANTELLE KINCY: But you really get to know someone when you travel, especially on an intense itinerary like that.
Ayla: But in the right space.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: um There's no hiding like who you are and all of the little things that come out. Like you said, when you're hungry, when you're tired, when you're overstimulated, and those things just add up.
Ayla: Yep.
CHANTELLE KINCY: So I love when you find like your person that you can travel with. I just went on a trip with my friend, Christina. And we went to some really cool places. But one day, like literally all I wanted to do was rot in bed because I just don't want to do anything, but I don't want to disappoint Chris.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And so i look over and she's just laying in bed on her phone. And I'm like, what do you want to do today? And she goes, honestly, kind of this. And I was like, oh my God, yes, let's just stay in bed all day.
Ayla: Yes.
Ayla: Yep.
Ayla: Breathing. Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: you know, it was just like, I love this day so much.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: so you went, it wasn't just you then and your product advisor, you were with other people that you didn't know, or did you also know them going into it?
Ayla: yeah
Ayla: So I kind of, so some of them had gone on like other trips with me because the year prior we did Iceland as a trip. So it was just the one, was just Iceland. And then we did um just Italy as a trip.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Okay. Okay.
Ayla: um So I think there was one person from each ah each of those trip on the trip, each of those trips on the trip. um and So um so i kind of knew them and then almost everybody who went was involved, like somehow affiliated with the conference that I speak at.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah.
Ayla: So I've probably seen them before in passing, some of them were other speakers. So I kind of knew them. um And so like we got closer with those people, but I think because I was sharing a room with Kat, especially like at the hotels and things like that, like there were times, you know, Kat and I are washing our laundry in the bathtub together because everybody else is trying, like packed enough suitcases for everything.
CHANTELLE KINCY: sure yeah
Ayla: And we're like, I don't want to lug those suitcases to four different cities.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Absolutely.
Ayla: um So I think it, we were able to meet other people and kind of get to know their personalities and kind of shown a lot a lot on those people too and but i think really the big part was us as a team coming together
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah. So let's talk about that. What are some of the moments that you remember good or bad kind of where you guys had to like pull together or where you were like feeling that connection?
Ayla: yeah no
CHANTELLE KINCY: Cause I know not everything went smoothly on a crazy trip like that. Like there's Yeah.
Ayla: So I think the biggest one that sticks out the most is, is the laundry. So we got to one of the villas that we were staying at and we got our room. And so we're up on like the third floor.
Ayla: um and you know, in Europe, the stairs are like super tiny and they're really steep. And so we're like lugging our gear up there um and we're sharing a room and there's no AC and it's hot.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah.
Ayla: And so we popped open the windows um that are like above our bed in the roof. um So yeah,
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah.
Ayla: Later on, all of our stuff just got wet because it rained. um But the biggest thing was we ran up and we washed our clothes in the in the um tub because there was a washer and dryer. For the first time, we had a washer and dryer.
Ayla: And so we were like, we're going wash our stuff in the tub. We're going wring it out really well. and we're going to throw it in the dryer because everybody else is going fighting over the washer. So we just want to get our stuff in the dryer, get it drying. And then while everybody else is figuring out their lives and then we'll go to the grocery store while it's drying, we'll come back, we'll put things away.
Ayla: Um, so we put it all down there and then we get a text while we're at the grocery store being like, you guys need to do something with your laundry. You didn't wring it out enough. Like it's sopping wet. It's never going to dry in this dryer.
Ayla: Like just everybody's upset at us. And so we're like, okay, just put it on top of the dryer and we will deal with it when we get back. Like, don't let it hold anybody else up. Like just, we will deal with it It's totally fine.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Eee!
Ayla: And we get back and like, as we're walking up to the villa, we can hear people by the pool, like talking about it and like just bitching and being, rude about it. And so we were like, whatever. So we bring our stuff back out. It really wasn't that much more wet than if you took it out of a washer and we took it upstairs and we just hung it to dry. We were like, it's fine. We just won't use the dryer.
Ayla: And we came to find out later, like after the trip, it wasn't us. The dryer didn't work for anybody. But not a single person told us that it wasn't us.
CHANTELLE KINCY: No one's going to go back on that. Yeah.
Ayla: No. And so we know these people were like talking about us behind our back because we heard them and they just, and I was just like, that just shows how much, like all you had to do was put it on top of the the washer and just be like, Hey, your stuff's not drying.
CHANTELLE KINCY: ah
CHANTELLE KINCY: But that's so uncomfortable the whole rest of the time because you're like, hello, you are a jerk.
Ayla: And we would just handled it. Right. Yeah.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And now I know. So yeah.
Ayla: Right. Yeah. And so I think that was like the hardest thing for us to overcome um with other people, but we handled it really well as a team.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah. yeah
Ayla: And so I think that was really important. and it And then it was nice to have her there because we but both could let off steam to each other instead of being those people that then talked bad about somebody else behind their back at that. ah Like we didn't want it to build up that animosity even more. we didn't want to be part of that.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Plus you had each other to like kind of rely on like if you're by yourself and you hear people talking about you, then the rest of the trip you're kind of just by yourself and I don't know who I can trust.
Ayla: So I think that was good.
Ayla: Yep.
CHANTELLE KINCY: I don't know who I could talk to. it's just kind of like an awkward vibe, right? Where at least we had cat, you had somebody like regardless of whatever these other jerks are going to do in their lives like you had somebody which is great.
Ayla: Yeah.
Ayla: Mm-hmm.
Ayla: Yeah. And then our other rule was like, we we stick together on everything. So Kat is gluten free. And so we went to find lunch once one day and we walked into a restaurant and everybody sat down and we got the menu and there was absolutely nothing she could order.
Ayla: Like ah all she could have is basically green salad. um And so we were just like, well, we're going to go find other food. And Kat was like, no, stay here with everybody. And i was like, absolutely not.
CHANTELLE KINCY: No.
Ayla: Like, that's not going to happen.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah.
Ayla: You came with me. I'm sorry that they picked a place. They knew you had you. There are therere restaurants right down the road that you could have ate at. at They knew and they didn't bother to ask. And so we're going to go and we're going to go make sure that you get fed.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah.
Ayla: And I'm not going to let you wander the city by yourself. I know you're okay with it. I know you're an adult, but it's not going to happen.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah. But that, I mean, shows a lot about your leadership too. is being willing to kind of like take care of your people and make sure everyone is provided for that's the mom, right?
Ayla: Yep.
CHANTELLE KINCY: That's the
Ayla: Yep. it Absolutely. And I can't, like, I'm not going to expect them to, you know, have my back if I don't have theirs either.
CHANTELLE KINCY: no, I love that. Yeah, that's, that's true.
Ayla: yeah
CHANTELLE KINCY: Um, so that is a bad moment, quote unquote bad.
Ayla: Mm-hmm.
CHANTELLE KINCY: You guys had good ones. What was your favorite of the, um, did you New York, Paris, Rome, London, where was your like favorite pit stop?
Ayla: yes
Ayla: I don't know. oh I love them all. One of my favorite things though is in London. um We've, because we've gone, we went on that trip and then we've gone back for another event since then. um the We went to Speakeasy in London and yeah, so nobody else went because everybody else was off doing stuff with the, with the group.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Ooh.
Ayla: And so we decided to take, we did one day of photo shoots and then one day that was a down day and the group went and explore where they wanted to explore. but Kat, when she was growing up, their family had a spot in London. So they went to London all the time.
Ayla: um So she knows all of the places. And so she was like, we have to go to the speakeasy. And she took me to the speakeasy. And you like, you don't know the door is the door. And then you go in and it's like the investigative kind of thing. And they're like, who are we investigating? And asking all the questions. And I'm just like, don't know, because I don't do this.
Ayla: um And Kat used to work on the Vegas Strip. So she's very like, outgoing and like bubbly and acting and things like that. And just going, and it was so cool to see her in that environment. And then they like walk you through a bookcase and you go sit down and in the space done up um really the thematically and beautiful. And they bring you specialty drinks. And i was like, oh my gosh, this is my favorite. Like we have to, every time we come now, we have to come here.
CHANTELLE KINCY: I have always wanted to do something like that.
Ayla: and
CHANTELLE KINCY: You've been to places they call speakeasies, but they're not like that. And I want that experience.
Ayla: get the name from her because she every time i'm like we're going to speakeasy right and she's like yes and then i she's just in charge of reserving it yeah yep
CHANTELLE KINCY: But you guys each have your thing, right? Like she's in charge of that. You're in charge of other stuff. And I love that with travel. That way you're not just like the one that carrying like the bulk of the whole itinerary. It sounds like you guys really balance each other out well, which has translated over to your work, right?
Ayla: yep yeah yeah and
Ayla: Yeah. So we've just found that like with us planning Scotland, it was um a lot of me being like, Hey, like this is what we're wanting to do. Do you know of anything? one of the things we wanted to do for our clients is the clients that booked the whole trip. um We're doing one day where we're doing a castle and whiskey tour.
Ayla: And so I posted on my Facebook and ah because I, because I don't think Kat's gone to Scotland yet either. And so i was like, does anybody know of like a good place for a castle and whiskey tour in Scotland?
Ayla: And she goes on and she comments and she's like, are you trying to take my job for me? ah And so she comes into work the next day and she's got like a list of like five to 10 different places.
CHANTELLE KINCY: ah
Ayla: And she's like, well, this one will work for this and this one for this. And like, what are you thinking? And so she has really become the person that I'm like, these are the things we want to do. Can you figure out where the best places are?
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah.
Ayla: Even stateside. Like if I, if we go somewhere in the South and i'm like, I want barbecue, like we don't have good barbecue in Washington. I want good barbecue.
CHANTELLE KINCY: I know. love that.
Ayla: She never lets me down. Always finds it.
CHANTELLE KINCY: i love that
Ayla: yeah
CHANTELLE KINCY: I had, where did I just have really good barbecue? Oh, this is so weird. I had really good barbecue in Nebraska last week.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And I was like, okay. I didn't see it coming, but like, thank God for that because it was so good.
Ayla: And that's my every time we travel, that's my request. I'm like, I want barbecue. We went to New York and I was like, I want barbecue. And she's like, you're not getting barbecue in New York, Ayla. And I was like, you can find it.
CHANTELLE KINCY: You're like, well, I might. I might be.
Ayla: You. Right. You should be able to find it.
CHANTELLE KINCY: You need to go out to...
Ayla: She's like, not New York.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Nashville has good barbecue.
Ayla: Yes.
CHANTELLE KINCY: um I had some good barbecue in Little Rock, Arkansas.
Ayla: And
CHANTELLE KINCY: So um what advice would you give to someone who's going with a team or even just like a group of girls? Like how do you... do you just kind of let things happen organically or do you try to like pick out people's like personalities and strengths ahead of time? Or do you sort of just like go with it?
Ayla: Yeah, so I think it's picking out their strengths and like their weaknesses and and understanding those and kind of navigating that. So we know like Kat, she has the spreadsheet for on the trip. And so she has what we're doing every day. And like, she knows, I give her a general idea of what we want to do. And she's figuring out where we're doing those things and kind of writing a rough schedule for me.
Ayla: um I am generally the one in charge of like booking everything. So sometimes Kat will send me stuff and then I'll book it or um I'll send her like Airbnb tends to be my choice because I need to know about lighting and the setup and things like that.
Ayla: um So anything that has to do with like billing or communicating with clients or creating their um like guides and stuff like that, I'll be in charge of that. And then she'll proof it for me.
Ayla: And then our makeup artist, she's in charge of um making sure when she goes with us, making sure she has all of her gear together, um making sure the schedule works for her. Cause she is, she's a single mom. So her schedule, sometimes she'll fly in after us or before us or whatever.
Ayla: um So she's got to figure that out. But then once we get going ah it's kind of knowing, how everybody works. And so we know like my husband, when he goes, we have to, like, if we're going to a restaurant, we'll tell him, Hey, we're going here. We've already checked. We know there's stuff you'll eat.
Ayla: There is meat on the menu. There's stuff you will eat. Um, otherwise he just kind of gets flustered around food because ah we've taken him once to a vegan gluten-free place. And he was like, there's no meat.
Ayla: like What am I going to eat?
CHANTELLE KINCY: who What are these words?
Ayla: Um,
CHANTELLE KINCY: What am I doing?
Ayla: Right. There's a mushroom burger. So, um so like we kind of know, like we know everybody's little things, right? So his has to do with food. like We need to make sure that he understands that there is going to be food that he likes. um My thing is timeliness. Like i cannot settle until we're at the gate.
Ayla: So I will book it. And I know that Kat will kind of walk with Jessica sometimes if I'm walking too fast to the gate, but I cannot settle until I'm at the gate. I can't settle until we're at the Airbnb. Like until we're at that place, i my brain is on fire.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah.
Ayla: um And so you learn those little things about each person and kind of like, become okay with them if that makes sense because i because for a long time i think jessica probably felt like she had to keep up with us ah when we're like booking it through the airport and unless it's an emergency i'm just like we will meet you at the gate um so you kind of just learn we're playing still at that spot
CHANTELLE KINCY: Right.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah. You just want to see the gate, verify that it's there. And like, that yeah. Yes. yeah
Ayla: Yeah, even if it's like two hours early and we we like we've gotten the team pre check because it's easier. um My husband didn't have it for a while. And so then we had to like navigate. Okay, Ayla has the gear through security because our lights like our big strobes like they look they have so many wires and batteries and stuff like they look suspicious on the scans.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Little sketchy. Yeah.
Ayla: And unfortunately, because of my husband, because of how my husband looks, he always gets secondary scanned at the airport every single time.
CHANTELLE KINCY: yeah
Ayla: Like I've watched him go through security and then have him pull his pockets inside out three times.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Insane.
Ayla: um So anytime there's stuff that like if if he doesn't have his pre-check and he's not with us, then I'll take the complicated stuff and he takes the easier stuff or we take as much as we can from him.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Right.
Ayla: um So you learn those little things because I know security is stressful for him. um you learn those little things that you would know about your spouse but then you learn that for your your employees or like the girls that you're going on the trip with too knowing those things ahead of time and having an open communication like what stresses you or like learning those things about people i think would make this the trip go much smoother for people and sometimes conversation
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah. And I think it's, it's learning those little quirks and then giving the people grace too, right? Like, cause we all have our weird things.
Ayla: mm-hmm
CHANTELLE KINCY: I'll make a confession. My weird thing is I ah will not set an alarm or get out of bed on an even number or on a number ending in five.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And I can't tell you why, but I just do. So if I set my alarm, it's like 733 or 737.
Ayla: You
CHANTELLE KINCY: And like, literally that's all that's happening. So my friend Shelly, the first time we went on a trip, she's like, okay, I set the alarm for 635. And I was like, okay,
Ayla: can't do it.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Can't do that. And she's like, what the hell do you mean I can't do that? I'm like, can you just make it 637? And she said, what? And she was just like, explain to me why. And i was like, I can't. I just will not get up on 35.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And so she was like, okay. But she went with it. And then like the second trip, I happened to glance down at her while she was setting her alarms for the next day. And they were all like threes and sevens.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And I was just like, oh, my girl.
Ayla: oh yes
CHANTELLE KINCY: And she goes, I want you to know I do not do this at home. i I don't even think about it till we're gone together, but I will set my alarm for you on a weird number. I'm like, yes.
Ayla: yes
CHANTELLE KINCY: So it's just like those little things. So now she doesn't question me. um I know she still secretly judges me, which is fine. I don't care. But Because I get that it's weird.
Ayla: like me with the volume. It has to be on an even number.
CHANTELLE KINCY: See why? I don't know.
Ayla: Yes.
CHANTELLE KINCY: It's just the way it is. And I don't want to talk about it and just do it.
Ayla: Yes.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Just do it.
Ayla: Yeah. love that.
CHANTELLE KINCY: but Isn't that funny? Like, I don't even remember where that started or how, but it just seems like wrong to do it any other way. And so even though that's a small example and like she can technically get up whatever time she wants, the fact that you find a travel partner who like
Ayla: yeah
CHANTELLE KINCY: get knows that even though she doesn't understand it is willing to like give that moment of peace to me. So I don't have a weird anxiety, like thing first thing in the morning because it does, it just like sets me off and like a weird vibe and who needs a weird vibe when you're traveling?
Ayla: Yeah.
Ayla: And then the rest of the day is not what you want. Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah. So I love that so much.
Ayla: Oh, that's amazing.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Um, there is a ah hotel that you refuse to talk about. Can we talk about it?
Ayla: We, this was on that same trip. So on our way back from New York, um, we, I, we just needed, ah we just needed to sleep is for like, I don't, I don't think we got there to like seven at night.
CHANTELLE KINCY: okay
Ayla: And then we were flying out semi early in the morning. So we weren't even a stay till checkout. And so I booked the hotel. Um, it was not in the best neighborhood, but we found some good places to eat, but we get there and we get in the elevator and I'm like, Oh my gosh, these people are on drugs.
Ayla: They're totally under like they are whacked out. Like, you know, like the bone skinny with all of the like, mark like markings, that like they are on they are on some heavy stuff.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah. They were in the elevator with you.
Ayla: They were in the elevator and I was like, okay. So they're staying here. Okay. And we get into the room and there's. Tissue like sticking out from underneath the bed and just like, it's just like little things that aren't clean. Right.
Ayla: Um, and there was something with the phone. I don't remember what was up with the phone. Maybe there was something by the phone. I don't remember. Um, but then we lay down and like 10 o'clock at night, we just hear this banging, just like bang. Everyone's wild bang.
Ayla: And we don't realize it till the next morning. There's a gym on the next floor. like not even the gym for the hotel, like a full gym with like you would have a membership for it.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Stop.
Ayla: Jim. Yeah. um And so we didn't realize till we left and we looked up that there was this gym here and I was like, that's what people dropping their weights. That's what we were all night because it was 24 hour gym. That's what we were hearing.
Ayla: But what got us to leave at six in the morning and go to the airport so early was because I woke up once in the middle of the night feeling something crawling on me. And then when i I was like, I brushed it off, not a big deal, went back to bed,
Ayla: woke up again. There were ants in my bed.
CHANTELLE KINCY: ah
Ayla: Yeah. I was like, oh my God, I cannot. And then trying to get them to do anything about it. Like they would not respond to me downstairs. They wouldn't respond to me via email or calling. They just kind of like pushed me through. And so I finally was like, that's fine. I have Amex.
Ayla: I'll just call it Amex. And I got a refund within two hours because I had so many pictures and stuff, but I was like, this is the worst experience I think I've ever had at a hotel.
CHANTELLE KINCY: yeah
Ayla: You're just,
CHANTELLE KINCY: I could not when and once you feel a bug on you like how do you even relax again afterwards like it just ah I can feel it right now that's terrible
Ayla: Mm-hmm.
Ayla: Yeah.
Ayla: And so, like, I mean, we've stayed in places. There's some questionable places in Washington that, you know, we've gone to, like, do beach shoots at, and so there's not really a good place. i can't remember where we stayed.
CHANTELLE KINCY: ah not a lot of choices yeah
Ayla: Yeah, and we were there, and we were like, mm, these people are, like, questioned. Like, we're not sure about this hotel. But, like, once you were in the room, it wasn't bad. It was just, like, don't let the kids wander kind of thing. Um...
Ayla: But we've never had one where we were like, this is not, this is not good. Or like the weights was the bit, I was like, between the weights and the and the ants in the bed, I was like, there I sat up and was like, we're leaving right now.
CHANTELLE KINCY: yeah, we're not doing this.
Ayla: And she's like, what is going on? it was like, we are leaving. Hmm.
CHANTELLE KINCY: I've only ever left one hotel and it was in Washington and it was for Bugs. And we checked in and it was supposed to be like this old, like historic, charming hotel. Right. So I'm like not expecting four seasons. Right. Like,
CHANTELLE KINCY: I know where we're at in the country. Like it's up in um like Winthrop area. So like we had been like at North Cascades and we were going to drive through down.
Ayla: well
CHANTELLE KINCY: And so i was like, okay, it's like historic. It's whatever. Like I don't expect it to be nice, quote unquote, but I do expect it to be clean. And so we go in there and there are bugs everywhere.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And I mean like cockroaches and like on the windows.
Ayla: yep nope oh in Washington we don't get those often
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yes.
CHANTELLE KINCY: no. And it was like up in the, like, and there were just, ah so I like go downstairs and I'm like, so there are bugs in my room.
Ayla: wo
CHANTELLE KINCY: And he's like, Oh, maybe someone left the window open. I was like, Hmm, I don't really think so.
Ayla: No, sir.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And so he's like, let me come up and like kill them for you. And I was like, whatever. So he comes up and he like looks around and like acts like it's no big deal. And I'm like, Hmm, So I'm like, I'm just going to try to take a shower. I sat on the bed and I was like, I don't even feel comfortable just sitting here.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Went to take a shower, moved the towel. And there was like a bug in the towel. And I was like, nope, like I can't do it.
Ayla: Nope. and
CHANTELLE KINCY: And he's like, well, I don't know if we're allowed to give refunds.
Ayla: Yep.
CHANTELLE KINCY: I'm like, I don't even care. Like I literally could not stay here.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: So then we were, because it was like Labor Day weekend and there was no place to stay, no place to stay there because there's only like two hotels in this whole town.
Ayla: yeah
CHANTELLE KINCY: We ended up by driving like three and a half hours, like to like Wenatchee somewhere like past Shalayan. There was no place. I mean, we drove until like two in the morning to find another place to stay because I was like, I can't do the bugs.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Like I can't do like, even we were in this like nice hotel.
Ayla: No.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Finally, ah just still felt like so terrible and gross.
Ayla: Dirty. Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: it's It's a vacation ruiner, like literally.
Ayla: Well, and we had, we had one in our second trip to London. We went to London and we booked, um, we booked kind like an Airbnb, but it was on the hotels.com, which is my first mistake, by the way, never doing that again.
CHANTELLE KINCY: For real.
Ayla: Um, and so i think they owned like the whole building and then they rented out the, the apartments, ah like hotel rooms.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Units like separately.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah.
Ayla: um And so we booked it really far ahead of time. And then ah couple months beforehand, my makeup artist was like looking at it. She's looking at the reviews and she's like, Ayla, did you not read these? Because this definitely talks about bed bugs. And I was like, it didn't when I booked it.
Ayla: Like, OK, like, I guess hopefully they dealt with it. Like, well, It's been a few months, like it'll be okay. We'll figure it out. So we went and it was in a really cute area and there was stuff walking distance from us. Like my, we got in there, put our bags down. My husband wanted to take a nap. So he laid down and we went to get drinks and he called us.
Ayla: Like we'd just gotten our drinks. He called us and he was like, we have to leave. He's like, I just got bit.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah.
Ayla: And I was like, so like we're in London with no other plan, having to find a Hilton somewhere to stay in.
CHANTELLE KINCY: yeah
Ayla: um And we get like, we had to go the opposite direction. Now we're not near anything we can walk to really, because we didn't want to spend a whole bunch of money last minute. And we get there we're like please just tell us it's clean.
Ayla: And we told them what happened. And they were like, oh my God, we're so sorry. He like gave us an upgrade. We're like, I'm so, I can't. It just, once you get up any kind of bug, it just, I can't do it.
CHANTELLE KINCY: I know. It just, yeah, it's one of those things. Even like if you see one on TV, like we were watching Hoarders the other day, which I don't know do that to myself, but there was bugs all over this house.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And like, I'm sitting on my couch, like rubbing my arms and like, this week because it's like, but I think the point is travel's never perfect, right?
Ayla: Yes.
Ayla: Yeah.
Ayla: Mm-hmm.
CHANTELLE KINCY: um There's always something. And I think that who you travel with or your attitude going into it really can shape that. Because those all could have been complete disasters.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Like your husband could have like been so pissy about it and like ruined the whole rest of your vacation and
Ayla: Yeah.
Ayla: Yes.
CHANTELLE KINCY: You could have like had a complete meltdown, um but you didn't. or Or, you know, you and Kat could have like cried about the laundry thing for the whole trip.
Ayla: Right.
CHANTELLE KINCY: But now instead, you're just like, we were tougher. Like we're closer.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: We got it through it. And I think that's the point of travel is it really builds you up in ways that sometimes you don't know you need. And then, and carry it forward, right?
Ayla: And then you learn so much.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Like there's those lessons that you learn
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: traveling that you can apply to being a mom or being a business owner or being a boss or a friend.
Ayla: Mm-hmm.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Um, and just learning those little things. Like, I guess I learned a lot about myself with travel, which helps me give grace to other people because sometimes I really want things my own way.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Like for no reason. I just like a control freak sometimes.
Ayla: Yep.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And, um, my husband's more just like, yeah, whatever. like Everything's cool. It'll all just work out. And I'm like, okay, then we're just going to do it my way. Then if you don't care, i don't yeah I'm just doing it my way.
Ayla: yeahp
CHANTELLE KINCY: But then I realized like that there are things he would prefer or that maybe like my friends would prefer, but they just... don't pitch a fit about it, but I can give that to them because I know there's things that are important to me too.
Ayla: Yes.
CHANTELLE KINCY: So I think that when you just realize, like, I didn't know that waking up to odd numbers was weird, but apparently people don't do that. So I have weird things and other people have weird things.
CHANTELLE KINCY: So it helps you like kind of see their things as not an inconvenience or not weird.
Ayla: yeah
CHANTELLE KINCY: I don't know how to exactly say what I'm trying to say, but
Ayla: well and sometimes that helps you too so like the like the hotel or the airbnb or whatever in london if we hadn't like if we had forced my husband to go get drinks with us then we all would have been asleep when stuff happened and it would have been later in the day because we were like no you have to stay awake you have to stay awake so that you get on the schedule here and he's like no i really just need a nap and so like sometimes those those little things that bother you actually end up helping you
CHANTELLE KINCY: Right.
CHANTELLE KINCY: oh Yes.
Ayla: and So just let people kind of their little things as ah as it's not hurting anybody and you're kind of working together. like he didn't have to go with us. We want to go drinks. It's fine.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Right. And it worked out for the best because like you said, otherwise it could have been you getting bit.
Ayla: Yeah. Right.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Right.
Ayla: Yeah. He took one for the team.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And instead you had a drink to bring your nerves down when he told you about the bugs.
Ayla: Yeah.
Ayla: Yep.
CHANTELLE KINCY: It was all great.
Ayla: yep so and i and i think i think that's the big thing is is learning everybody's little quirks and and trying to accommodate them the best you can and then keeping track of those for later and then learning how those can help you um and like cat with her gluten like now we like she's in charge of figuring out food because then she can look for her gluten stuff um and things like that so you kind of learn and and divvy things up based on strengths again
CHANTELLE KINCY: And that's empowering her too to kind of take control of her own, you know, schedule and her own issue there.
Ayla: Yeah. Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: But then teaching you guys about it too, because I don't travel with someone who's gluten free. I wouldn't know where to begin.
Ayla: Yep.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Like it wouldn't occur to me until we were in that situation, you know, that that would happen.
Ayla: Yep.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Like, I know if I go with people who don't drink, I'm not going book, you know, that the, the Jameson tour or the whiskeys or whatever,
Ayla: yep
CHANTELLE KINCY: but that's because someone has to tell you that and then you have to incorporate that into.
Ayla: yep
CHANTELLE KINCY: So I think that's another thing that by traveling with different people, you just learn about different lifestyles too. And you learn about, about new things. I have one friend who is vegan and she made me have vegan pizza with like vegan cheese.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And I was like, This seems not okay, but whatever. You're here and I want to make you happy. That was the best dang pizza I have ever had. I'll tell you what.
Ayla: Right?
CHANTELLE KINCY: ah But I would have never ordered it.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: I would have never even given it a shot if it wasn't for Robin being like, just have the pizza.
Ayla: Mm hmm.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And I was like, all right.
Ayla: Just try.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And it was so good.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: was so good.
Ayla: Yep.
CHANTELLE KINCY: yeah. so
Ayla: yep
CHANTELLE KINCY: yeah
Ayla: And I think, i think just that's what everything's taught me is just that you can't, if you stay in your own little bubble, you can't experience all the things. And so bringing your people with you learning their stuff and letting them have input and things like you experience so much more and you learn so much more. And I think you get more in depth on things and your experience is just so much better.
CHANTELLE KINCY: I love that. That's such a good tip. um
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah. Thank you for hanging out with us today and telling us about that.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: I want you to tell people where they can find you. Can we follow you on Instagram? Can we, do you have a site? Tell us all about that.
Ayla: Yeah. So um I have three, but my main one is Ayla Quellhorst, which I'm sure my name will be in the show notes. oh
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yes. I'll put the link in there too. i just, yeah.
Ayla: Okay. Perfect. It's just a like wall horse.com. Um, that's my boudoir studio. So if, um, if boudoir is not something people want to look at, I have, um, studio queue, it's just studio queue.com and that's my family studio.
Ayla: Um, but you can search any of those in our so social media and stuff should pop up as well. Um, but yeah, we do tons of, tons of different trips and things like that.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Very cool.
Ayla: We're doing the Scotland ones already booked and then we have to loom for 2027. yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: very cool.
Ayla: yeah
CHANTELLE KINCY: So let's talk about boudoir for a minute because this is going to be slightly off of the travel topic, but I think it will fit well into women empowering themselves, right? Because that is such a vulnerable...
Ayla: Yeah. Yes.
CHANTELLE KINCY: idea. I haven't done it.
Ayla: yes
CHANTELLE KINCY: um I've seen people do it and I think it's so beautiful. How do you as a photographer help women kind of get past that initial like, oh, I don't know. And how do you see them kind of change through that process from the beginning when they get to your studio to they walk out with those with those prints?
Ayla: Yeah, so we like the biggest thing for our studio is that we it's going to sound really weird to say um we aren't like super duper professional when the client's here. um We want our clients to feel like they're just hanging out with girlfriends.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah.
Ayla: And so we have them. I start with a phone consultation with everybody. You can't get on my books unless you do a phone call with me because I want to make sure it's such an intimate experience. If I'm not a good fit for you, like I can refer you to somebody else.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Sure.
Ayla: Um, so I always insist on those. And then, um, which really helps us find the right people that are coming into our studio. And then once they're here, we do hair makeup here at the studio. Cause my cosmetologist is full-time for me.
Ayla: She's not hired just on, like she's in the other room right now working. Um, she's not hired just when I'm doing photo shoots and she spends an hour and a half doing hair and makeup with them.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Okay.
Ayla: And I sit in hair makeup and I'll crochet while they're doing hair makeup. So we have that girl time and literally like if the client's coming in because she just got out of like a nasty marriage like she will just let that all out or if she's getting married yeah we talk about her wedding if she's getting married um like whatever she needs like it it is that girl time um and then we kind of carry that through the whole thing so when we're shooting and stuff like that my husband sometimes if the client will let me which most of the time they will because he sits in hair makeup too he'll let him they'll let him help me shoot which is great because i'm
CHANTELLE KINCY: Dumped all that out. Yeah.
Ayla: kind of awkward socially sometimes. And so he will learn things in hair makeup that he'll bring into the photo shoot and then like kind of pick on them a little bit like we all do. And then the clients will pick on us back.
Ayla: Like they've gotten to know us to a point where everybody's just kind of like that friendship level.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And it kind of just lowers that anxiety. Yeah.
Ayla: Right. Yeah. And we're just like, oh, um he'll pick up like shows that they watch that we like. And then I'll be like, hey, I need a joke to make her smile. And he'll say some random line from the show that they talked about in hair makeup. And so we're just carrying that all the way through um the whole shoe. And Kat is my product advisor.
Ayla: So she shows them their pictures and helps them pick out their prints. and i'll hear her back in that room sometimes tell people like no you can't pick that one you have to pick this one because your booty looks fan fantastic like she will just be so blunt with people and so we're just carrying that like we are your hype girl best friend through everything because that's really what the experience should be where i know so like other studios will do that but i know a lot of studios they just want to be you know very put together and very professional and yes we we want to be professional too
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah.
Ayla: But I feel like those barriers break down more when you're hanging out with people that you trust and like people that you would hang out with anyways.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Absolutely.
Ayla: And so we want clients to feel that.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah. That's amazing. But I think um that women, we're so hard on ourselves, right? And so just hearing someone else be like, dang, girl, your butt looks great in that picture.
Ayla: who
CHANTELLE KINCY: And you're like, oh, does it?
Ayla: Yes.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Okay, cool. Like that just brings you so much farther out of yourself.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And like you said, being in such a vulnerable and intimate situation. um i love that so much. I think that um that kind of photography is excellent for women's empowerment.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: I love that you do that.
Ayla: Yeah. When I went to, I went to the dentist the other day, this is a little off topic, but I went to the dentist the other day and she like kind of did some stuff in my, with my teeth. And then she was waiting for the doctor and she's like, I just want to tell you, you're like really pretty. And I was like, I'm sorry, you were just up in my mouth telling me I need to floss more. like But it was such a confidence boost. i'm like, that's how I want people to feel when they leave the studio.
Ayla: um whether or not you you buy a big package or not and we try to keep our our pricing lower than i know what the industry standards are so that we're more accessible for people because i know that experience is what like that time here is what's more important than that final product the final product's great because you can go back and look at it and remember it but really
CHANTELLE KINCY: yeah
CHANTELLE KINCY: yep
Ayla: the The way people come in and they're kind of shy and quiet when they start hair makeup to when they're leaving, they're like laughing and outgoing and like their personality really comes out. That's what we're, that's what we're wanting.
CHANTELLE KINCY: And that's what's beautiful too. And I think that makes the photos more beautiful too when they can be themselves and see that inner part of themselves that they might have forgotten about or not even known.
Ayla: Mm-hmm.
CHANTELLE KINCY: I mean, that's that's incredible.
Ayla: And you can see it in the pictures too. Like I have a very specific pose that I start with for my first pose because it's the easiest one and it's like my throwaway pose. So it's the one that like sometimes people order it, sometimes they won't. It's super easy.
Ayla: But then I'm going to like the more challenging poses are at the end because I want them to warm up too. And we always, when we pick out outfits, i'm like, which one are you most comfortable and confident in? Okay, that's the one we're starting with because I want you, I want to start with that.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah.
Ayla: And then the one that's most outside your comfort zone is the one we're going to end with because you have that time to warm up.
Ayla: so for wardrobe, sometimes client will bring their own and then sometimes we'll we have a closet, might have like 700 items. So sometimes we'll just pick from mine.
CHANTELLE KINCY: like Yeah, that's so cool.
Ayla: Just kind of depends.
CHANTELLE KINCY: What a cool experience.
Ayla: Yeah. Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Something that um I've thought about doing, but it's been too scary for me, so I should suck it up.
Ayla: Well, when you're ready, now you know that we're here.
CHANTELLE KINCY: I know. And we're close by each other.
Ayla: nearby.
CHANTELLE KINCY: That's crazy.
Ayla: Yeah, it'll be perfect.
CHANTELLE KINCY: So for everyone listening that wants to do it, Ayla's in Washington state.
Ayla: Or we I mean, we travel, so.
CHANTELLE KINCY: So I know we've got lots of listeners here too, so you guys can hit her up.
Ayla: Yeah.
CHANTELLE KINCY: But ah that was a little off topic from travel, but I do think it fits in well. And so I'm glad that we brought that up because think it's just another aspect of learning to love yourself and learning to put yourself out there and really just kind of embracing, you know, who you are and, and going with it.
Ayla: yes Yeah,
CHANTELLE KINCY: So thank you for sharing that.
Ayla: of course. Thank you for asking.
CHANTELLE KINCY: Yeah. So I'll drop all of Ayla's links in the description there and you can all follow her and reach out if you need anything from her. But thanks again for sharing your experiences with us. And it was so good to talk to you.
Ayla: Thank you for having me. Great, you too.
CHANTELLE KINCY: All right. Take care.
