When Your Light Feels Like Too Much: Shrinking in Relationships, Self-Sabotage, Choosing vs. Attracting and More Unthinkable Thoughts with Africa Brooke
267: “It all has to be in alignment. I have to be living very honestly in order to do my most honest work. And honesty is a fundamental requirement for the work that I do. I find that if I'm not living honestly, and it doesn't have to be a hundred percent, if I'm not living honestly in ways that are actually very important, I actually can't show up for my work in the way that I need to.” ~ Africa Brooke
This soul-baring conversation between Chelsea and Africa dives deep into self-censorship, shadow work, heartbreak, and the raw journey of sobriety. Together, they explore how our patterns in love and life reveal the unhealed parts of ourselves - the ones we try to tame, cage up, and discard. Yet the truth is: owning and integrating these parts and reclaiming our voice is a revolutionary act. Listen closely.
Africa Brooke is a Zimbabwean-born consultant, developmental coach, speaker, and author of "The Third Perspective: Brave Expression in The Age of Intolerance." She is known for her work in overcoming self-sabotage and self-censorship. As the founder and CEO of Africa Brooke International, she provides consulting and coaching to a global audience. She hosts two personal development podcasts, “Beyond the Self” and “Unthinkable Thoughts,” and is a frequent guest on TV, podcasts, and radio. Her insights have been featured in publications like The Guardian, and she has delivered keynotes at venues like Cambridge University.
- “What happens when we believe that there's a higher cost to telling the truth than to pretending?”
- “I decided to suffer out loud, and that was going against so many rules... I was just speaking into the void.”
- “I would choose people that I perceive to be lesser than me in some way, so that I get to be the superior one in the relationship... but it’s me they’re showing me.”
- “Instead of chasing the new self-concept of ‘I’m a good person,’ I had to accept all the shadowy components of myself and humanize myself.”
- “Be okay with talking about your interests... because that’s what makes it erotic. That’s what creates magnetism.”
This episode is a masterclass in emotional honesty, self-responsibility, and embracing the full spectrum of who we are. Chelsea and Africa remind us that the path to empowered relationships and aligned work begins with radical truth-telling - to ourselves first.
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