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Episode 2
20 Plays2 years ago
This episode includes topics such as going through a long-distance relationship, who gets the middle armrest and going out on the town (whichever town that may be).
Transcript
Introduction and Listener Appreciation
00:00:00
Speaker
Hello and welcome back to Being Whitty. If you're new here, welcome. Love to have ya. If you listen to episode one and then you're just back again for more, love you too. Welcome. So I'm
Challenges of Long-Distance Relationships
00:00:15
Speaker
gonna go ahead and start off just with the overall topic of long distance relationships. So overall, I've been in a long distance relationship
00:00:27
Speaker
well there's been like two parts to the long distance because it's almost been a year now so my boyfriend is in the military he's in the marine corps and he left for boot camp in oh my gosh march which seems like forever ago but in the moment it
00:00:45
Speaker
went by so slow. And before that, he was going to Texas A&M. So we were long distance anyways, already commuting back and forth whenever we weren't even dating, which I've been told by all my friends that it was a frustrating time because both of us were playing chicken. Anyways, we started dating and he decided he was going to go into the military, into the Marine Corps.
00:01:11
Speaker
and he had a little bit more free time then to come and visit me because he was going to school at that time but so he left in March and I don't know if everyone knows this but in boot camp you cannot have your phone or basically anything at all you're stripped of everything like the first probably 48 hours but really the first 24 hours you are kept up straight you get your head shaved you get your ID picture
00:01:39
Speaker
I mean, I think you're fed. They take your phone, all your current clothes, you get new clothes, you get issued gear and all the things. So it's super overwhelming all
Balancing Personal Life and Long-Distance
00:01:48
Speaker
at one time. You're being yelled at too. So without his phone for the next three months until June, which everyone's like, oh my gosh, that's so cute. But at the same time, I'm like, yeah, it is cute. And I love having the letters. I mean, I still look back at them like Tuesday, even when I miss him now, but
00:02:07
Speaker
it's the only way we could communicate so yes it's cute but on like my side of things it was just a way for me to talk to him and i went not psycho but i checked the mail every single day i went to that mailbox multiple times a day i was mailing letters
00:02:28
Speaker
out my ass and just trying to get some from him. I even um on USPS if you like download their app you can sign up for this thing. I forget what they call it. Oh it's informed delivery so you get a message whenever you have a package coming to the mailbox and so since I had roommates I also saw when their mail was coming. With that I was able to see if I was going to get a letter from him so they'd like have a picture of it and then it would come in like two days maybe like oh my
00:02:56
Speaker
Oh my gosh, so exciting! I sent him 40 letters and he was able to send me 18. So that ratio was really off, but he does not have as much free time as I did where I was just like in class thinking about him all day every day, which I still do. But he was
00:03:16
Speaker
you know, getting thrown into mud or tackling someone or learning how to shoot a rifle. So he had things to do but he wrote me when he could and so I appreciated literally every single word in every letter ever. In that segment of Long Distance where you literally cannot talk with modern communication, it
00:03:39
Speaker
It's very hard because you're waiting on the letter, but at the same time, you don't want to stop your life and then wait to catch up to theirs. You don't want to stop because they're almost frozen in time. They don't have contact to the outside world.
00:03:58
Speaker
And you can totally get wrapped up in it and say, I'm just going to sit around and wait to hear from him. And like,
Coping with Lack of Physical Touch
00:04:05
Speaker
like I said, just stop your life. So I had to remind myself, like, it's OK if I don't get a letter from him today. I need to go out and do things. I need to be with my friends. I need to go to work. I need to go on walks. I don't know, workout. I took one Pilates class.
00:04:21
Speaker
which I still have another free one to sign up for, but honestly, it probably expired because that was like six months ago. But that's besides the point. I have lots of opinions on long distance relationships because you can make it how you want, but if you really, really want it and you love that person, then it will work out. So you can say and thank whatever you want about long distance relationships, but don't be coming to me and saying some fuck shit just because yours didn't work out. Because if you want it to, then it will. Living proof, me and Robert.
00:04:51
Speaker
And so he's out of boot camp now and is just learning basically how to do his job Which is titled as signals intelligence. I know nothing about what he does because it's very top secret and I'm He can't tell him anything. I don't know I like not that I have anything to share if I had something to share I would but like That's that's it. Like that's that's the limit of it. I don't know anything about what he's doing which is kind of how it's supposed to be but I
00:05:22
Speaker
It's hard, or not hard, but when we FaceTime, I'm like, oh, how was your day? How was class? But you can't tell me anything about class. So I'm just like, okay, let me tell you about my day then.
00:05:35
Speaker
anyways so that's that's kind of my take on how long this has been like factually like it's it it's hard at first because i am someone whose love language is physical touch and i just like want to be with you like if i'm with you like my foot is touching your leg or my hand is on your arm or i'm like we're sitting so close to each other like our legs are touching
00:06:04
Speaker
And I do that with all my friends and family. And it's very,
Virtual Expressions of Love
00:06:07
Speaker
very evident if you're ever around me. And I'm a hugger too, so I give lots of hugs.
00:06:14
Speaker
And so at the end of the day, when all I want is like a hug from him or a kiss or just like a little like, hey, like touch on the shoulder or anything, I can't get that because he's right now three and a half hours away from me. And so there's other outlets that I've had to find to work that out. And so that also I think plays in to long distance relationships when people don't wanna work it out. They don't wanna have to compromise
00:06:42
Speaker
I think the way that they know how to love and the way that they're comfortable with it and you need to like expand on that. It's like expanding a skill set. Once you take on a new job, you developed further skills of it could be communication or collaboration, delegation. It could be, you know, team working, whatever.
00:06:59
Speaker
And this is a way to expand how you love. I think of it that way. Like, you think of, okay, I can FaceTime, I can text. We can Netflix party, and then we can have game nights where we, like, right now we're playing Words with Friends 2, and it makes me so happy every time, like, I see that he played me back, and then I can go and play him. And so it's the little things like that that you also grow to appreciate. And
Communication Strategies for Long-Distance
00:07:23
Speaker
you just kind of work with it.
00:07:24
Speaker
And I think there's a big negative connotation around long distance relationships that does not need to be there just because you can hear a lot of ugly things about it. And I don't think that they're true for the majority of people in a long distance relationship, especially a military one, because it is
00:07:47
Speaker
I don't keep saying hard but it's more taxing and it just takes a lot of patience. It's definitely not for the faint of heart. I can and will say that. So if you take anything away from this it's that if you're getting into something you need to know that you're getting into it and you need to be very confident because if you're confident in yourself and you're confident in that person and you're confident in your love then it will work out.
00:08:12
Speaker
And that's all there really is to it. And then you figure it out along the way. It's like a new experience with your person because it's both new to you, possibly. Normally it is. And you can navigate it together. It's when you isolate yourself that it becomes
00:08:29
Speaker
very very confusing and that's when times get difficult and so communication also has a big part in that and I'm not saying like I am going to the grocery store today and then after that I'm going to Leah's and then after that I'm going to Megan's oh but actually on the way there I'm gonna stop here like no it's not like a
00:08:49
Speaker
you're giving them GPS coordinates and they need to know exactly what you're doing all day, every day. It's like a catch up on the day, but you're still talking and having small talk, deep conversations, phone calls, a mix and a FaceTime calls, and you need to be able to just accommodate to different needs at different times, if that makes sense.
Planning a Visit and Humorous Anecdotes
00:09:13
Speaker
And so I'd say also another big thing is just like driving and having to get there. I have not been to San Angelo yet where he is, but he has been to Austin I think three times now already. And it is my turn to go and I think I'm going to go in my
00:09:32
Speaker
probably four weeks when he graduates on November 9th, which was super fun, even though I'm probably gonna be like the only person in the crowd there. I will have a sign, Robert, I will have a sign. I don't know if her face is gonna be on it yet, I haven't decided that, but I need you to expect to be unexpected. Also, question if anyone knows how to get a mariachi band onto a military base.
00:09:58
Speaker
Also let me know that because that could be fun to jazz it up. So in, okay, but in car rides, who do you think should get the middle armrest? Because, okay, think about it logistically. If by law the driver is supposed to have
00:10:18
Speaker
two hands on the wheel at what is it like nine and two o'clock no it's ten and two nine and three or whatever some weird fuck shit your hands are supposed to be on there like a clock and then you're not supposed to i mean i guess you put your elbow on there but realistically your hand isn't supposed to be there so then it could be either someone sitting in the back leaning forwards to talk to the people in the front or it's the passenger the passenger can lean on the armrest
00:10:48
Speaker
But let's say you're driving with one hand, do you get the armrest? Or do both seats already have an armrest, and then there's the middle console? It's so confusing. It's like, I don't know, that's, I was gonna say it's like a paradox. But you know what, I don't really think I know what a paradox is, so I'm not gonna try to use that word correctly, because that's just gonna sound silly.
00:11:10
Speaker
But for real, who gets the middle armrest? And also with cup holders. So the driver could
00:11:20
Speaker
put their drink in like the first or the second one. I'm not talking about the cup holders that are on either side like on left and right. I'm talking about the top and bottom ones. We're talking about vertical cup holders. Who gets the top one and who gets the back one? Because I feel like people switch it up like the driver gets the one at the bottom because it could be
00:11:42
Speaker
close to them and they don't have to reach as far up to grab it. But if they have longer arms, then I guess maybe they would want the top one because that's more comfortable for them. But is that true? I don't know. I'm going to leave like a little, little question with the episode. So answer as you may, and maybe we'll talk about the results next episode. But I think that's interesting to think about. Because not that anyone's really going around asking the question, who gets the middle armrest, but just think about it. Just sit with it for a second.
00:12:12
Speaker
And speaking of road trips, besides visiting my dear boyfriend, so Texas OU weekend was not this past weekend because that was ACL. It was two weekends ago. And if you don't go to the University of Texas, or it pains me to say it, Oklahoma, bleh, gross.
00:12:36
Speaker
If you don't go there, then you don't probably know about Texas OU, but it's our biggest rivalry game.
Dallas Trip and Nightlife Adventures
00:12:42
Speaker
The Red... I can... This is how I talk, guys, in real life. I'm being so deadass. Red River Rivalry. I think I have a, like, not a list, but I do, like, a weird thing with my tongue, and I just cannot say that.
00:12:56
Speaker
So it's our biggest rivalry. Why is that hard to say? Is it hard to say some words for you guys? Like there's just some words that I say very weirdly. Like sometimes I say road. Like weirdly, I didn't say it weird just then. I don't know. There's just some words that it's like consistently every time I say them. I don't remember that I see them wrong, but then I'll say them and I'm like, wait, I don't think I pronounced that correctly or just said it correctly. Anyways,
00:13:26
Speaker
So I was in the front seat and I guess Leah was driving and then Maddie was in the back. And so I kind of got, I don't know, Leah and I kind of, I guess switched with the middle armrest. I don't remember. At one point I was curled up in a ball asleep, but I think I was leaning on the armrest.
00:13:46
Speaker
I don't know. I'll have to ask Leah and see if she paid attention to it. Maybe she has an answer. It was also her 21st birthday in Dallas. It was the day of the game and so it is all around the state fair in Dallas and then in that stadium. So we were just basically at the fair because we all didn't want to buy tickets for the game and after halftime you can just walk in anyways. They don't care after that.
00:14:11
Speaker
that was the plan but we started drinking and then we were just watching on tv and we were like we're not going inside we kind of camped out at a little area and then made friends some old guy next to us had a flask of maker's mark that thing was gone by the end of the game
00:14:32
Speaker
He just wanted to share. Sharing's caring and I accept that. I accept the sharing. But back to the 21st birthday. So I had never gone out in Dallas before. I, yeah, I don't think I've even, not that I've been in Dallas for a setting where I would go out, but I just haven't.
00:14:51
Speaker
And it was, the bars are very interesting. I was expecting it to be like Rainey Street in Austin, if you've been there. It's kind of like older houses, but they turn them into bars and it's just like a whole street of them. It was, it was cool. Like there was kind of one street like that and they were kind of outside bars, you know, when they have like that sitting area outside and then it's kind of open to the inside, but there's not like a door to go in. If you know about Canaan Abels in Austin, it's like they were all Canaan Abels.
00:15:19
Speaker
And it was super fun, but going out Saturday night, we went to clubs. Words of Sophie's aunt, who we stayed at her house. Thank you, thank you so much. Also, by the way, she took us out to what she calls the gayborhood, all the gay bars or slash gay clubs. And I hadn't, I've been to a couple in Austin, like Coconut Club, Reign. There's another one, but I always forget the name of it. I've been to a club, I've been to C.L.O.
00:15:50
Speaker
which is also really fun, but these were just like something I haven't experienced before. So I'm walking into one of them and there's just this guy.
00:16:00
Speaker
Like, I don't even, I was so caught off guard. I was not, I stood there and like talk about being frozen. You know when people in movies freeze and you're like, why don't you run away? Why don't you say something? What's wrong with you? You're just an actor. I was legitimately frozen. Real as fuck, I did not know where to walk or move or say it. Like my jaw was just dropped. This big ass muscular guy, tatted up, wearing like a thong.
00:16:30
Speaker
speedo thongs i don't know i didn't get a good look and then oh no this is going to get graphic if i keep explaining so i'm not going to do that anymore anyways dancing up top on this platform around this pole just like jumping up and down and i was like i i'd only seen shit like this in movies and it's when people are on like
00:16:52
Speaker
Molly and lose all their friends. Not that any of us were going to do that at all, but I, it was just surreal almost.
Exploring Nightlife in Texas
00:17:00
Speaker
And it was so much fun. They had like a disco ball in there. We were all jamming out, dancing. Then we did karaoke, karaoke to Shania Twain. So, so good. Where do y'all go in Dallas? If you're from Dallas or like the Fort Worth area or even Frisco, like
00:17:14
Speaker
You go out to clubs like more like theory or something, or I think Bottle Blonde is another one that Sydney kept talking about. So where do y'all go out in Dallas? Because I think I'd like to go back and go out. Not that I know the next time I'll be in Dallas because I don't at all. It'd be good to have a running list of the places to go to, you know? Just to be like, oh, if we ever go there again, like, let's go out here.
00:17:37
Speaker
I think like I want that for every city though because I'm from Houston and I have only been out in Houston once and by the grace of God I survived that night because I was with Miss Anna Grace Brion and we had
00:17:54
Speaker
way too many sex on the beaches and I just remember her putting me in the bath that night and that's it. Apparently I called some people the next morning I was so hungover there accidentally threw up in her car I had her pull over on the side of the road it was not good guys. So I don't remember too much of when I went out in Houston but I would love to know where everyone else goes. I think I went the two places no three places that I do remember were theory
00:18:23
Speaker
dogwoods, and I think Christians, Christians tailgate. And they were all pretty fun, all very different vibes, if I remember correctly. But I don't know, I think I fear about my friends from Houston talking about these other places they go and I'm like, I've never heard of that. And I lived in Houston my entire
00:18:40
Speaker
life. But if you were to ask me about coffee shops, I could tell you about all the ones in Houston.
Favorite Drinks and Seeking Recommendations
00:18:44
Speaker
Like I would love it kind of more in my area, which is like south suburbs, but still still fun. So where do y'all go out in let's say Houston, Dallas, and then Austin. So Austin, I will give a huge shout out right now to Victory Lab because they are a newer bar and it's
00:19:02
Speaker
i love uk enables but it is kind of taking over their crowd because one it's also just a bigger space two they have a giant ass led screen outside plus a pizza truck sometimes other food trucks and then oh my gosh they had like this one truck there for a game day for a pregame and they were giving out like free ranch waters if you just followed their company on instagram they have all these cool deals and their shot list
00:19:32
Speaker
is so good. If you ever go to Victory Lap, it's in West Campus as well. If you ever go get their white gummy bear shot, I don't know what's in that shit, some type of vodka, but that goes down like water. It's just, maybe you'll get a little stinging in the throat afterwards.
00:19:52
Speaker
but wow i have never been able to take shots except and like unless it was like malibu or like watermelon or green apple schnapps but that is just something that wow i was amazed i was very impressed with myself and then impressed with the drink or the shot
00:20:16
Speaker
They also have, they call it a Texas mule, which is super good. It's just like a Moscow mule. And then I get their spicy watermelon marg. Very good. If you want margs in Austin, definitely maybe go there. And there's some other places. Denata does a great marg. Love their margarita. Just their regular tap one. Get a tajin rim. Very nice.
00:20:42
Speaker
uh i'm gonna say this place wrong because i don't speak spanish but it's called tequero mucho i apologize if i said it wrong but they have good drinks as well they have one called bitch juice which is first of all i just ordered that for the name they also had one drink one time i ordered because it came with heart sunglasses you best believe i spent 20 on it because they came with the sunglasses and it was a great drink
00:21:07
Speaker
but their bitch juice is also really good. So if you're looking for, if you're, it's more, it's giving bachelorette, you know, like if you're with your bachelorette party, you're going to go out to six street in Austin, you're going to go to west six. You go there before and it's like pink, girly, cute photo. I don't know. It just like reeks of bachelorette party to me.
00:21:28
Speaker
And then, you know, you have Matt's El Rancho common staple for their knockout margarita. Knockout martini. Also very good. Be careful if you have two. You have the iconic Baby A's for their purple margarita, which if you don't know, you are legally limited to only two because they put ever clear in it. So you literally, they will not let you order more than two. And most of the time, one is all you need.
00:21:56
Speaker
Holy one is all you need and eat maybe eat somewhere else before you go there, but still so great good atmosphere You know chewy's margs are never a fail either Um lupi tortilla good one. That's where I go at home. Very very nice
00:22:14
Speaker
I'm trying to think, I need to branch out and go more on Congress and other places in Austin to find places that have margaritas that I like. Because I guess that's my drink of choice. If I'm somewhere, that's what I would want.
00:22:30
Speaker
But I need to find like mine where I really love it. You know when you just have a place and you're like you get off I'm speaking like I'm literally in my 30s having a full-time job but you get off of work and you just want to go somewhere with your co-workers or you go just with your husband or like some friends and you're just like I just want a good drink I just want like a good martini or a good margarita and like you have a go-to place for that. I don't have that.
00:22:58
Speaker
So I need that. I need recommendations. I need some really really good ones. Especially like I feel for this month, there are so many of my friends turning 21 and we're constantly gonna like be out every weekend and we're going to all these new places but I still haven't found my Margarita place. Or Martini for that matter because a good Cosmo I will definitely go for any day of the week.
00:23:26
Speaker
And you know what?
Conclusion and Collaboration Invitation
00:23:27
Speaker
I think I've been talking long enough and for way too long about alcohol, so I'm going to leave a question with the episode of what my intro song should be. Intro song slash jingle. If you have any ideas, please tell me if you also, um...
00:23:44
Speaker
I don't know I would say oh you know what you can reach out to me through instagram as well if you even think you can like make one for me we can collab I'll give you a good shout out you know on the new up and coming podcast or whatever that has like 19 listeners so let me know about that give me your thoughts give me your tidbits give me your questions too okay bye bye loveys