Transcript
Speaker: Welcome to Season 2 of the Women of Kriya Yoga Living in Joy podcast, a gathering place for women walking the spiritual path. These conversations are an offering from the Women's Sangha and Ministry of Kriya Yoga International in the lineage of Paramahamsa Pragyananandaji and Paramahamsa Hariharanandaji.
Speaker: Our host is Mary Dale Ma, a devoted disciple, seasoned yoga teacher, mentor for more than 40 years, and founder of the Param Yoga Healing Arts Center in California. Greetings and salutations to you.
Speaker: Before we begin, let us take a moment to anchor ourselves in the present and in the presence of the divine. Join me with a nice deep breath.
Speaker: Exhaling with ha.
Speaker: Again, deep breath.
Speaker: And relax as you begin to decompress, if you will, and bring your whole attention just here now.
Speaker: Continuing to follow the sweetness of your own breath.
Speaker: Perhaps close your eyes.
Speaker: Om, beloved father, divine mother, Sri Gurudev Paramahansa Hariharananda Girri, beloved Guruji Paramahansa Prajnanananda, our Paramguru Paramahansa Yogananda, we bow at your feet.
Speaker: May this conversation be sacred. May remembrance become presence. May devotion awaken in every heart listening. Please guide our words, open our hearts, and let love speak.
Speaker: Om Shanti, Om Shanti, Om Shanti, Amen.
Speaker: Wonderful. And now, welcome beautiful souls to Living in Joy. Today is not simply an interview. No.
Speaker: Today is a pilgrimage. We are so blessed to sit with Divine Yogacharya Nisha Pandey born in Amritsar, India, a seeker of truth from childhood initiated into Kriya in 1978 by our renowned beloved Sri Gurudev Paramahansa Hariharananda when she was in Puri, and Nisha remained then in his close association for nearly 25 years, bathed, as she says, in his unceasing love.
Speaker: Nisha Ma, what an honor to sit here with you today. Welcome, welcome, welcome. Now, Nisha Ma, before Gurudev, before Puri, before initiation, there was a little girl in Amasar.
Speaker: What was stirring inside of her? What did seeking feel like in your childhood heart?
Speaker: First of all, my heart feels gratitude for inviting me to be a part of the sacred podcast. It's truly my honor to be here As we begin, i look forward tosh to sharing this sacred journey with you and with all of us.
Speaker: Thank you, thank you, thank you. Now, since you asked me about my childhood, my childhood, it was shaped by a religious atmosphere.
Speaker: filled at home with prayers, reading Bhagavad Gita, reciting Hanuman Chalisa by my father before going to work. He taught us these values not through lectures, but by the way, he lived his life each day and he showed us what it means to live in Dharma.
Speaker: And surprisingly, I learned Anubhanshalis at a very young age just by listening to him. And I did not even know the meaning of it.
Speaker: And um these childhood influences, they nurtured the sense of my devotion and they planted seeds of spirituality and curiosity in me, which continued to grow.
Speaker: And in my youth itself, I went on several pilgrimage with my father to the holy shrines of Bajinath, Kedarnath, Gangotri, Yamnotri on the footwell of the Himalayas.
Speaker: The Himalayas always attracted me like a magnet. And I had the blessings of many saints and sages who lived in the caves and mountains that left a very deep impression in my mind.
Speaker: And I found solace in their calm presence. And this was the inner call that attracted me towards the spiritual path until I met Guru Dev.
Speaker: And that was the turning point in my life. I met Gurudev while I was studying in school at a very, very young age. I was hardly 17 years of age.
Speaker: Now, the turning point in my life came when I met Gurudev. My eternal gratitude to Gurudev, who had been a source of inspiration and guidance throughout my life.
Speaker: He was a unique, self-realized spiritual master, a river of compassion, a father, a mother, a friend, and an image of humility.
Speaker: His presence inspired me. His teachings illuminated my path and his constantly directing me towards the goal of my life. Gurudev helped me to navigate life with wisdom and inner strength.
Speaker: Now, Nisha Ma, was that um before you were introduced to Kriya in 1978? When did you actually meet Gurudev for the first time? What was your first sight of him?
Speaker: Yeah, I met Gurudev. Actually, I came into contact with Yohuk in 1978. We were living a small town. That was before I met Gurudev.
Speaker: yeah in not in Central India. And when I saw the picture of the lineage in that ashram, I was taken aback.
Speaker: I stood motionless in front of them. And I had a very deep feeling that and a very deep connection. And I was told that the present master, he lives in Jagannathuri.
Speaker: And that was the biggest urge I had in my life to go to Puri and have his blessings. So it was in 1980 that I met Gurudev in Karar Ashram in Jakarnath Puri. And my sister had met Gurudev a year before and shared her experiences.
Speaker: and um when i my sister had met gurui a year before and shared experiences And day and night I would think, how would I make it possible?
Speaker: As the city where we were living, it was very far from Puri. And my parents at that age would not allow me to travel on my own. So I prayed devotedly and finally my prayers were answered.
Speaker: And I found a way out. So and my father, he said, after you when you do good in your exams, I will let you go and visit your sister. So after my exams, I made a plan with my sister secretly.
Speaker: And I told her that I'm coming here just to take you. And we I want to go to Jagannathpuri. Please stay. So I boarded the train to Cochim and the city was quite, it was closer to Puri than Delhi.
Speaker: She boarded the train from there and both of us left for Puri. It was a very long journey of two days because of the slow moving trains and all. But my excitement knew no bounds. I just wanted to go and have the darshan of Guruji.
Speaker: So when we reached Puri, leaving the luggage outside the meditation hall, I stepped in. The very first look of Guru Dev was so blissful.
Speaker: but He was tall, with deep eyes and a radiance almost emanating from him. And the very first sight I knew that he is a true person.
Speaker: Self-realized spiritual master. And God has sent me this master to be my guru. So as we entered the hall, Gurudev looked at us. He was initiating people.
Speaker: And then he left, he looked, who yeah you know, looked back again. And at that particular moment, a thought came to my mind, that why is he touching the spine of people?
Speaker: Is that necessary to realize God or to see God? And Guru Devak once got my thoughts. And pointing at Mizi, he says, so you have come here to judge me?
Speaker: I probably thought that he is talking to somebody else. But then, you know, he looked at me, you, you, you, I'm talking to you. So you have come to judgment.
Speaker: Oh my God, I was so embarrassed. And he said that I want you to go and to the Samadhi temple of Sri Yukteswar Giri and meditate.
Speaker: So with a lot of embarrassment in me, and there were almost tears in my eyes, I was asked to go instead. you know I was thinking that I will get a very warm welcome there.
Speaker: So as I stepped out, and my sister consoled me. And he she said, oh, do not get disheartened.
Speaker: There must be a reason. So as we walked towards the Samadhi temple, and when we reached the Samadhi temple, it was so beautiful, so serene, full of divine vibrations inside.
Speaker: So I com composed myself and I knew that the is some there is some, you know, doubt in my mind which is keeping me away from experienc or'm experiencing all the divinity I'm feeling in this temple.
Speaker: So as I composed myself and both of us sat down to meditate, and after some time, I felt something very, very strange happening to me.
Speaker: There was a dazzling light which enveloped me, and there was so much of light that I couldn't open my eyes. My hands and legs were stuck, and I was almost enough in such a blissful state that I have never experienced before.
Speaker: and the vibrations inside the temple were so strong that I felt the earth almost moving. And there was nothing but tears and tears and tears that fell from my eyes.
Speaker: This lasted for some time until my sister, she patted my shoulders. She said, it's time to leave. And to my amazement, I found that almost 45 minutes had gone through.
Speaker: And as we stepped outside the temple, we saw Guruji standing. And I bowed to seek his blessings and he blessed me and he said, Mother, you have come.
Speaker: I'm very happy to see I'm very happy to see you. And the most amazing thing he said is that I wanted to you to have that experience which you did just now.
Speaker: before you as accept me as my guru. Oh my God. I was totally astonished to hear those words. And follow me, he said. And he took us to his room.
Speaker: And there, you know, we had planned to stay outside, but he insisted that we stay in the ashram with him. And he called the sannyasis and told them to make arrangements for our stay.
Speaker: And before I left the room, He said, you'll be initiated tomorrow morning.
Speaker: And the whole night was, you know, i was I was just imagining, I was thinking, where have I come? It's such a divine, beautiful place. I had never thought of it can and I'd never even imagined it and read so many books. But this was something something very, very special, I would say.
Speaker: It's something very spiritual. So the next morning was the initiation. And this initiation was done in a very Vedic way.
Speaker: He chanted all the Vedic mantras and he wrote Om on the tongue and on the fontanel with a honey dipstick. And after the initiation, they made some remarks about my past life.
Speaker: And he said, see the auspicious tilak on your forehead, ma'am. And I see the sadhana of your past life.
Speaker: You are ready for the second level. And I at once told Guru Dev, I cannot come to Puri in 10 days. So he looked at me with a very stern look and said, never question your Guru.
Speaker: If I want, I can even come and initiate you in your dream. This was another... to me. But to any anyway, the after the initiation, we spent almost a week in the ashram.
Speaker: It was such a beautiful time of my life. And um most of the time was spent in meditation with Gurudev. He made sure that we sat in front of him when we meditated and we did the practice.
Speaker: And he would sit on the bed and with his stick, he would point out to all the chakras and where all the more blockages were. and tom And the rest of the time we spent in the ashram was preparing meals, helping out in the kitchen and long walks along the shores of Jagannathpuri.
Speaker: And then came the time to leave. because the day i I had no interest in going and sightseeing or going to ah anywhere outside, i just didn't want to to leave that sacred place.
Speaker: It had glued me like a magnet. And we did nothing. And Guru Dev spent so much of time with us. And I had never seen, you know, although I've met love many saints and sages,
Speaker: and gurus, but Baba was so different. Instead of we getting after him, please teach us this, this, he would make sure that we start and we meditated in his presence.
Speaker: So when the time came to leave, I plead in my system, can you leave me behind? I don't want to go home. so it My sister, you know she complained to Guruji.
Speaker: She said, you know we haven't told our parents that we are in Jagannathpuri and now Misha doesn't want to go home. how What should I do? Guruji, he said, you.
Speaker: a ma i will always be touchched Whenever you meditate, you will feel my divine presence. And even of today, you know, any trouble, any problem came in life.
Speaker: Guruji was always there. There was an answer which came during meditation.
Speaker: And then on the day of the on the day when we had to board the train, we had asked for a rickshaw to go to the airport, to go to the train station, because the train used to start from Puri.
Speaker: And suddenly i what I see in the morning, that two rickshaws came. I was wondering why two. And suddenly Gurudev came and said, yeah and I saw Gurudev sitting in one of them.
Speaker: And he said, I'll come to the train station and see you all off." So Gurudev came to the station. He came inside the coach and he made sure that all of our luggage and everything was finally, you know, safely secured.
Speaker: And then he told the people around that these girls are traveling on their own. It's a very long journey. Do not let them get off the train.
Speaker: to buy food. And very sweetly, you know, he put his hand in his bag and he took out a ah yeah packet of food.
Speaker: And that prasad, it lasted us almost until we reached home. So when we reached home, you know, the mind was in Puri and day and night I would say, why did Baba say 10 days?
Speaker: What will happen in 10 days? I cannot go to Puri. And, you know, there was some confusion and some kind of a doubt in my mind. And my sister said, maybe, you know, just because you were not willing to come, just to make you feel happy, you must have said that, okay?
Speaker: i took it with a pinch of salt. But on the ninth day, surprisingly, you know, a call came from Tyagi. And I had never seen in my life and never heard of it.
Speaker: And she said that I'm Dr. Tyagi speaking and Guruji is in Delhi. And he wants to see you tomorrow at 11 o'clock.
Speaker: First, you know, i was there was so much of excitement in me and I quickly noted down the address, the telephone number and everything. And the very next morning, we headed to Dr. Gyadhi's house.
Speaker: And Gurudev, he was waiting for us. And it was seeing him, you know, brought so much of joy. And it was like a long lost child suddenly feels the comfort of the mother.
Speaker: And Gurudev lovingly, he blessed us. and And then, you know, he he initiated the second level. And Gurudev stayed in Delhi for almost, you know, three, four days.
Speaker: And there was daily meditation at Dr. Dayaki's house. And being in Guru Dev's presence was meditation itself. He would spend hours rectifying and explaining the techniques.
Speaker: And he would always say, meditate according to my advice, according to my directions, and do not waste time.
Speaker: Life is very short-term. make use of this human opportunity for it might not come back again. sir So then came, then from there, doctor and it from there from Dr. Tyagi's house, he left for Germany.
Speaker: And when he left, I, you know, I asked him that, Gurudev, would you come and stay with us on your return? If you can, even if it is for a couple of hours or a day, you said, definitely, ma, I will come and stay with you.
Speaker: So while, when Gurudev was away, he would write a long letter posted on to my address. And in this very letter, he had small letters which were written to various disciples in Delhi or in elsewhere in India with their addresses on that.
Speaker: And I would cut those pieces which had their name and their addresses, put them in the envelope and post to the approach addresses.
Speaker: And all these, ah the messages and the letters were nothing but meditate, meditate, and meditate.
Speaker: and watch your transformation." And then ha on his r return, when Gurudev came back, baba the Baba came to our house and there was so much of joy and the whole house was filled with this divine energy.
Speaker: There was laughter and the house almost looked like a temple. and when Baba brought his suitcase and everything, we brought it to his room and I was trying to help him to unpack.
Speaker: And I had never seen a suitcase so, so neatly and meticulously packed. And Baba said, Maji, on the left hand side, and when he came home, that in a very short time, he had mingled with the whole family, like a family member.
Speaker: And it looked as if, you know, a grandfather has come home. Like, you know, everybody was so full of, ah you know, happiness and everybody was eager to do something for him.
Speaker: And Baba said, Maanji, on the left-hand side, two inches deep, there is an orange scarf. Okay, exactly two inches inside the on the suitcase was the orange scarf.
Speaker: So I took out the scarf and handed it to Gurudev. And Gurudev put it on my shoulders and said, you will be a Yogacharya in the West.
Speaker: My God. where I was quite surprised to hear that. and um yeah this That scarf still with me.
Speaker: And whenever I do the initiation, I always put it on me. It's the most precious thing I owe. and yeah you know and And during mealtime, I would often make an excuse and step away from the table.
Speaker: And my father told Gurudev, he says, he complained, he says, this girl gives me lot of trouble. She doesn't each enough. He said, okay, don't worry, Baba.
Speaker: So as long as Gurudev stayed, you know he made sure that I saw it sat beside him on the dining table. He would take food from his plate and put it on me, saying, Maji, this is Prasad.
Speaker: And once you get prasad, you must eat it without waiting for a minute. And that was his motherly love.
Speaker: You know, which guru or who will do something like that for you? His love was from the heart. And now when in a good mood, in a joyful mood, he would sing.
Speaker: He would had him yeah had a very melodious voice and he would sing in Bengali. And most of his songs were from ma'am the writings of Ravindana Tagore.
Speaker: And after, between to um nineteen eighty to nineteen eighty seven i visit probably four times And during one of my visits, I met Gurudev's elder brother, who was initiated by Gurudev, his ah nephew and his sister-in-law.
Speaker: And he comes um from a very aristocrat family of doctors and lawyers. And Gurudev had learned astrology, astronomy, and palmistry from his father.
Speaker: and And he would read our horoscopes very attentively. And he would write mantras to rectify the malefact of stars and planets.
Speaker: And not leaving there, he would make us repeat the mantras several times and would check on our pronunciation.
Speaker: and correct it if we were missing out on anything. And Gurudev was a very wonderful, you know, he was a lover of nature.
Speaker: He loved flowers, fruits, trees, and Gurudev had planted many mango trees in the ashram, in the Miami ashram, and had given them each a name.
Speaker: And surprisingly, When the mangoes were served to him, he knew exactly which piece of the mango came from which.
Speaker: He had that beautiful insight in him. And he was a ah gifted gardener. And at the same time, he was a very he was a symbol of punctuality.
Speaker: Always ready before time. if there was a doctor's appointment or if he had to go for a lecture or somewhere, he made sure that he was ready five minutes before leaving.
Speaker: and And a very wonderful listener too. So whenever Gurudev heard something new, something worthwhile, important, he would at once take out his notebook.
Speaker: and make special notes. And that notebook, he always kept it under his pillow. And when he heard under the pillow, and from I was away in China.
Speaker: And during that time, I did not cut get you know to meet Gurudev personally. But then God paved the way for me and we came on immigration to Canada.
Speaker: And the very first thing did was to contact the ashram. And I got to contact the ashram and Gurudev came on the line and he said,
Speaker: Nishama, I'm so happy to hear you. I'm so happy. Where are you? I said, Baba, I'm in Vancouver in Canada. And my voice almost choked and I had just tears I couldn't.
Speaker: And Gurudev knew that and I was crying, being very emotional. And he asked me to come. He said, come, I want to see you.
Speaker: So I yeah flew to Miami in 1998, just a few months after we had landed in Canada. the fire ceremony was going on.
Speaker: And I think it was that particular day when Guruji was honored the title of Paramahansa, my Guru. And um after the ceremony was over, you know he called me.
Speaker: and he inquired about the family. He said, want to know about your family now. And I told Gurudev that, Gurudev, I have a son. And my son was, I think, five years old that time.
Speaker: And I took out a picture and showed it to Gurudev. And Gurudev looked at him for very attentively. And then he put it on his head and blessed it.
Speaker: And he said, Ma, ma I'm going to make him a doctor. Again, I had a giggle. I said, Guruji, he's only five years old. but You wait.
Speaker: He will be a big doctor one day. And with Guruji's grace and blessings today, he's a specialist. And i always tell him that whatever you do in your life, how big you become, be humble like him.
Speaker: And he makes it a point to you know go and bow in the temple where we have Gurudev along with all the other deities in the house.
Speaker: Then ah during my second visit when I went to Puri, the flight was delayed. and The flight normally used to land at about 7, 7.30. And because of all the hurricanes and everything, it was delayed for quite a number of hours.
Speaker: And Gurudev always sent somebody to the airport to receive him. And he would say, Ma, don't come with anybody. If you see anybody, somebody carrying my picture,
Speaker: Just follow that person. Okay. So I came to the ashram. And when I reached, it was almost about 10, 10, 13 at night.
Speaker: And was told that Guru Dev is waiting for you. i surprised I said, at this time? um He goes to bed very early. He says, no, tell Nishamad to see me before, you know, before she retires to bed.
Speaker: So I went to Gurudev's room and so beautifully, so sweetly, you know, a plate of food was set aside for me. And Gurudev waited and I had no appetite, but he waited and said, you must eat before you go to bed.
Speaker: And, um, Such was his love. And you will find that it was not only for me, but people who were very close to Gurudev.
Speaker: He had the same affection and same love for everybody. For him, his devotees were so precious that I think he loved each and everyone of them. yeah you know wherever he found that any trouble would come in their lives before it came would do chug and prayers and make everybody's life so easy in spite of all troubles and turmoil of life then on the second visit you know I in the morning I went to say goodbye to him and Guruji was not well
Speaker: He was lying in Immediately he got And he said, ah he we looked for his stick and looked for the wheelchair.
Speaker: He said, I'm going to leave you at the meeting gate. I said, no, Baba. I pleaded to him. i said, Baba, please, you're not well. Do not expose yourself.
Speaker: And he said, no, Maji. And he insisted and he sat on the wheelchair and the other people followed him. And Gurudev came to the gate and he said, mom, this will be the last time when you will see Hari Kuru.
Speaker: And,
Speaker: excuse me, his words They pierced through my ah heart. And said, Baba.
Speaker: He said, Mahaji, don't worry. Your Guru will always be with you. I will always be with you. I will not leave you.
Speaker: But try and be like Hari Ghanda, so that whenever anybody sees my devotees, they will say, These are Harivana Jailis.
Speaker: Parting with Gurudev, you know, I sometimes feel that and then the third visit it when I went, when Guruji had always, Gurudev had all already left his party.
Speaker: And that day also was a very, ah home very different day. And um I got a call in the morning from the ashram that Gurudev's health is declining.
Speaker: And yeah I got very much worried and I kind contacted all the other devotees who were very close to him in Vancouver. And we all planned to get together there to pray and meditate for him.
Speaker: So before leaving, you know there was a red rose which was in the garden. I plucked that red rose and took it with me and placed it on Gurudev's picture.
Speaker: Just after the meditation, that ta rose, it fell from the picture as if Gurudev has come to tell me that I've left my body.
Speaker: I got this hint, but I didn't want to do admit it.
Speaker: So anyway, we left the hall, you know, all of us were... Nobody wanted to tea talk. Everybody was silent. Everybody had moist eyes. And I drove.
Speaker: You know, it was very hard for me to drive from that place to come home. And when I reached home, my husband broke the news that Baba is gone.
Speaker: I was almost frozen. I felt like a child. and felt as if I'd become an orphan. So used to Guru Tema.
Speaker: And there was there wouldn't be a single, I wouldn't few days wouldn't pass and I would talk to him. my He was like a pillar of my life.
Speaker: Any decision, anything I wanted to do in my life, I always contacted him. I took his advice. And sometimes I feel that whatever i received from Gurudev, I'm not worthy of it.
Speaker: And I pray to God and Gurus with the utmostest gratitude and love for having given me this beautiful, beautiful opportunity to serve such a great master of this era.
Speaker: And I always say is that I'm not worthy. I'm absolutely not worthy. I have yet to, you know, what my guru is, I have yet yet to reach that place.
Speaker: I always pray to God to give me that strength to love, live up to his expectations. And that is what Guru Devo said.
Speaker: Well, we know sometimes the guru leaves the body so we can discover that he never truly leaves. And so even though you can't contact him physically now, you contact him all the time through your meditation and through your heart. He's always with you. That's really true, ma'am.
Speaker: Really true. Many times, you know, After meditation, any doubt which is in my mind or anywhere, I farm find a direction, somebody to guide me.
Speaker: I just pray to him. And sometimes, surprisingly, you know, I hear his voice in Bengali.
Speaker: Many times. And, you know, I feel that he is he has never left. He's always there. When I see you know anything which he admired or which he liked, it always reminds me of him.
Speaker: And on his birthday, is enough I cook that you know the special meats which he enjoyed eating. He was a lover of sweets.
Speaker: He loved Bengali sweets.
Speaker: But, you know, life without him is still so empty, but yet no regrets that he is there with me constantly like a shadow.
Speaker: Of course. And Ma, how did your relationship with Guruji evolve after Gurudev left his body?
Speaker: Now, Guruji, I met Guruji in 1918.
Speaker: long time back in Karar Aashram Jagannath. Not knowing that he will be representing the lineage after Gurudev. What Swami Vivekanand Ji was to Ram krish action to not Krishna Krishna, Guru Ji was to Gurudev.
Speaker: Guru Ji stands distinguished and unique among saints and sages of this era. He's a unique self-realized spiritual master representing this unbroken lineage.
Speaker: An esteemed scholar has authored almost over 150 books. When I see Guruji, he reminds me of Gurudev. Gurudev's presence in him. I see his presence in him.
Speaker: Gurudev has folded him in his own image with the same amount of compassion, love and dedication. He works and travels tirelessly to spread the message of his Guru.
Speaker: Following the footprints of Gurudev, Guruji has dedicated his life to the service of humanity.
Speaker: And I admire him as my guru. His simplicity, his discipline in life, his humility, his punctuality.
Speaker: It's very rare to find in a guru of this of this era, I would say. At the same time, I cherish a very beautiful relationship with Guruji.
Speaker: of, although he's my guru first, the relationship of a sister and a younger brother. So this time when Guruji came home and I addressed him as Guruji Maharaj, he checked me and very innocently and lovingly says, don't call me Guruji Maharaj.
Speaker: I'm not Guruji Maharaj, I'm your younger brother. this These sewers which were full of love, full of innocence, they brought tears in my eyes.
Speaker: And and i you know I felt so fortunate that you know we have a guru of that stature in our life.
Speaker: And I pray to God. v you with you know ah to bestow whatever remaining lives of mine remaining years of my life to goru there to Guruji.
Speaker: Because it is very difficult to find such a pure soul in this era. And I always, you know, I do not disturb him too much by, you know, coaxing him with phone calls or anything.
Speaker: from the inner core of my heart. I pray to God in Gurus to give Him sound good health and so that we can have His blessings till the end of our lives.
Speaker: And we could be of some use to Him, like how much we have gained from Kriya Yoga. If we can give back something, in I know we cannot give back.
Speaker: That is not possible. But whatever little seva we can do, we feel very happy to do that.
Speaker: Beautifully said. And he fulfilled Gurudev's promise to you that you would indeed become a Yogacharya. And Guruji appointed you 2017.
Speaker: That's pretty remarkable when you really didn't think that that was going to happen. I'm not worthy. I'm really not worthy.
Speaker: Well, Ma, you're just ah a wonderful soul and you wouldn't be a Yogacharya if God and gurus didn't want you to be. And I know firsthand that all those that you initiate feel the presence of Guru Dev when you touch them. So my question is, when you're initiating you do you feel Guru Dev's presence with you?
Speaker: And do you feel his energy flowing through you into the students? What is that like for you?
Speaker: i you know, before initiation, oh when I go in front of the altar and I put that orange scarf on me, I feel as if Gurudevas entered into my body.
Speaker: And... hi I know when i do when the initiation is going on, I do not know myself that I ever exist there.
Speaker: It is this energy. It is the Guru's energy. I'm just a tool. It is this energy which works through me. And whatever people feel, it is Guru there.
Speaker: It's not me. I'm not worthy of it. His energy is so powerful that sometimes I cannot hold my own self together.
Speaker: Wonderful. Well, Ma, with no disrespect to our flow of honoring Gurudev, I'd like to just segue a little bit for a moment or two and give you a platform to speak to us about your time spent with Mother Teresa.
Speaker: Could you do that? Yes, woman definitely. hi good you know ah In 1987 is the time when I got an opportunity to spend a couple of hours in Mother Teresa's orphanage in New Delhi.
Speaker: It was called the Nirmalera Dam. And the wonderful time i spent with these children, it's still so fresh in my mind, playing hide-and-seek, telling stories, making my houses, their laughter, the twinkle in their eyes, and their warm hugs.
Speaker: It would melt my heart, and we both would look forward to the next meeting. And this little this beautiful time which I spent, it led me to meet Mother Teresa in person and seek her blessings.
Speaker: Her deep compassion, her selfless service, her dedication and humility, they are beyond words. at left That inspired me and left a very deep impression in my mind that she was like an angel.
Speaker: You know, this world is full of beautiful people also. Yes. Yes. And you're one of them. And I'm so happy to know that you actually met Mother Teresa as she has always been.
Speaker: a guiding light in my life, and I believe in the six degrees of separation. So since you met her, it's only one step away from me. So, Jai Guru. Jai Guru.
Speaker: And Ma, I know you also spent quite a bit of time in Germany, China, and Tibet. Can you share those experiences with us a little bit? Sure, Ma.
Speaker: oh We went to China in 1988, 89. eighty eight eighty nine And yeah being a communist world, there were no temples.
Speaker: And all the old temples which were there, they were all, la you know, almost ah destroyed, I would say. But living in China, I got an opportunity to go to Tibet.
Speaker: And my goal of going to Tibet was to go to Kailash Mansarovar. That was my goal. So when we went to Tibet, and um we went to the Pachola Palace.
Speaker: And to my surprise, when I, it's it's a huge palace. When I went from one room to another, I found that our kriyas,
Speaker: well in were inscribed on the walls. No way. I was totally astonished that how these Kriya techniques have been inscribed in these walls.
Speaker: And, you know, that give me that, this thing that, you know, we come from a very strong lineage. Yes, indeed.
Speaker: That's just remarkable. Yeah, man. And although, you know, I couldn't big go to Kailashman once or over, there was a landslide.
Speaker: So we had to return back from Tibet again.
Speaker: But this is one of my desires, that I would love to go to Kailashman once or over once. That would be great. That would be great.
Speaker: You will make it so, for sure. And you spoke about being married and then becoming a mother. And I know that you are very devoted to your practice. How do you balance everything in your life?
Speaker: Mother, what I do is i come integrate my my spiritual life with my daily or routine.
Speaker: I do not, ah rather than seeing it as something separate. For me, balance comes from treating them as one flaw.
Speaker: My path of Kriya explains it very beautifully. It says that Kriya has two words, Kri and Ya. Performing action is Kri. and feeling the presence of God or the soul as the doer of all the action is here.
Speaker: It is that power without which we cannot perform any activity, which is of our soul, our breath, or the divinity within us. With the constant awareness of the divine, when we do any action, it becomes worship.
Speaker: Whether it is eating food becomes feeding God in the human body, working in the house or working in the office, it becomes like a service to God in different names and form.
Speaker: The more I watch the breath with the constant awareness of the divinity in me, me it gives me the strength. I stay centered. It gives me the strength.
Speaker: to fight through all the challenges, whatever the day brings. Then I prioritize my routine. My spiritual practice comes first. Thing in the morning, when the rest of the family is still in bed.
Speaker: This meditation of mine fills me with a tremendous energy to handle the rest of the day smoothly. And at the same time, weave small sacred pauses throughout the day.
Speaker: mindful breathing, listening to bhajans, short meditation, and a prayer before going to bed. These little acts, they keep me aligned and connected, even in a busy schedule.
Speaker: For me, my practice is the most important thing I cannot live without.
Speaker: Well, it sounds to me like you live Kriya, and that's what Kriya is all about. It's not to segment it into parts of our life when it's convenient, but it is a twenty four seven practice. And you're an example of that, which I really honor and cherish, Ma. That's so beautiful.
Speaker: And for our listeners, Ma, who... might be longing for spiritual intimacy, which you have certainly um embraced and experienced throughout a lifetime.
Speaker: For these individuals who hesitate from, let's say, surrendering, what would you say to them about trusting the Guru's love?
Speaker: You know, when the... it's... ah when we start our spiritual journey. ah When we start our spiritual journey, it's very important to understand, remember that spirituality is not something outside.
Speaker: It is the awakening of the light that is already within you and but spirituality, it's not about adopting other people's ideas or other people's path.
Speaker: It is about uncovering your own. And it's a very slippery path of highs and lows. Sometimes you feel deeply connected, other times not at all.
Speaker: But listen, honour your intuition. Find a path which feels right for you and stick to it. Do not change it. Have faiths. Listen, read,
Speaker: and and connect with the religious spiritual groups. Connect with other women as there is something very powerful in women supporting each other.
Speaker: Find a group or even a friend who shares your interest. Listen to your body, what energizes you and what drains you and let joy be a part of your spiritual journey.
Speaker: that it because it opens your heart more than any other effort. And above all, trust that a living power is guiding and directing you in your life.
Speaker: It's all about things. And and and then God makes a way for you to move ahead.
Speaker: Beautifully said, beautifully said. And now we had the privilege of beginning this time with you, Nisha, by remembering and honoring the child who was seeking God and the masters and had so much influence and opportunity and grace that brought you to the feet of your true guru.
Speaker: And the rich relationship that you had with Gurudev He pointed out that meditation is the path for all of us to take, but you surrendered to that and you lived that life. And now you have grown into a perfect example of how beautiful a life can unfold by trusting the guru and their word and guidance. So now as we come all the way back to Guru Dev,
Speaker: If you had to describe your life with him in a single word, what would it be?
Speaker: My life with Guru Dev was like living, was it's like living in divinity itself.
Speaker: Wonderful.
Speaker: Wonderful. And now Guruji is caring on for him in such a magnificent way. So humbly and and devout and dedicated to always giving everything back to Gurudev. It's kind of remarkable.
Speaker: so selfless. Very. And so sincere and so humble and yet a great master in every way.
Speaker: Well, Nisha Ma, I cannot thank you enough for finding a little opening in your very busy life to take this time to enrich all of our lives with your true story. It's been a treasure to glimpse how you have managed to live. And listening to you today, we're reminded that the guru-disciple relationship is not a theory.
Speaker: It is living fire, it is surrender, it is refinement, and it is love that outlives the body. So we thank you for allowing us into that sacred space, Nishamala. Thank you for having me.
Speaker: And I enjoyed this journey with you, ma'am. And blessings to all who have been listening. Thank you, ma'am. Thank you.
Speaker: thank Thank you for giving me this opportunity. So whatever i had, I could share it with people. Yes. Thank you. What a voice. Thank you, thank you, thank you. And we will close with a a little quote from our Paramahansa Hariharananda, our beloved Guru Dev.
Speaker: He wrote that, if you deeply love God and sincerely practice meditation, You will feel the guru guiding you from within. The outer form may disappear, but the inner presence never leaves.
Speaker: Beautiful. and with amen And with that, if this conversation has touched your heart, our dear listeners, we invite you to stay connected with our growing circle of love and inspiration.
Speaker: You can find Living in Joy on YouTube, Spotify, and Apple Podcasts. Please like, subscribe, and leave us a comment because it helps these stories to light others on fire with truth.
Speaker: Please visit our website, which is womensministryofkriayoga.org. And until we meet again, may you walk in grace, live in joy, and remember the quiet power of your own beautiful soul.
Speaker: Jai Guru, ohantihi ohantihi Om Om Shantihi. Amen.
Speaker: This podcast is brought to you by the Women's Ministry of Kriya Yoga International. You can learn more about the ministry at our website, womensministryofkriya.org. Kriya Yoga is a powerful meditation practice that awakens constant communion with the divine through the science of the breath.
Speaker: Handed down from teacher to student in an unbroken lineage of enlightened masters, it transforms body, mind, and heart, helping us be calmly active and actively calm. Today, this living tradition welcomes seekers everywhere through the guidance of Paramahamsa Pragyanananda, the principal disciple of the great master Paramahamsa Hariharananda. To learn more about Kriya Yoga, please visit kriya.org.
