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🎙️ New Episode of Born on the Bayou Sports! 🚀⚾🏀
Tim Costello and Scott Barzilla are back to break down all things Houston sports!
🔥 Astros Spring Training is underway, and young gun Cam Smith is turning heads early—could he be a breakout star?
🏀 Houston Cougars dominate again! Tim gives props as they clinch their second straight Big 12 title.
😬 Fred VanVleet is still MIA for the Rockets, and Scott is starting to get seriously worried. Can they stay afloat without him?
And, of course, it wouldn’t be Born on the Bayou Sports without the fan-favorite awards:
🏆 Tips of the Cap
🤡 Horses Ass of the Week
😈 Scumbag of the Week
Don’t miss this action-packed episode! 🎧🔥
Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):
https://uppbeat.io/t/kevin-macleod/airport-lounge
License code: EZNFTKVSGQJILWUR
Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):
https://uppbeat.io/t/ra/upbeat-heat
License code: DKIJCM2LYWMPS8S7
Be sure to follow the Born on the Bayou Sports Facebook page: https://shorturl.at/7mCU3
Tim Contributes for:
https://shorturl.at/scQ2T
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Transcript
Introduction to 'Born on the Bayou Sports'
00:00:06
Speaker
Welcome to Born on the Bayou Sports, a Houston sports show made for Houstonians by Houstonians. Join Tim Costello and Scott Barzilla every week as they break down the latest in Houston Astros, Rockets, and Texans news.
00:00:24
Speaker
Tim's a former minor league broadcaster, and Scott has written two books on the Baseball Hall of Fame.
Javier's Potential as a Cy Young Candidate
00:00:32
Speaker
Yeah, Javier could get it figured out, it would make things a lot easier because he was that guy everybody was counting on this year to be a Cy Young candidate, take that big step forward and and help anchor this rotation with Tromber.
00:00:44
Speaker
Since he's come to Houston, you can look at the development of guys like Carlos Correa defensively, Jeremy Pena defensively. I mean, you know, Balix Bregman's, you know, certainly I think a better than average third baseman.
00:00:56
Speaker
And now you're putting teams in third and eight, third and seven, third nine. Now here comes Will Anderson. Pin back your ears. Let's go.
00:01:04
Speaker
So if you're Bayou born and bred, or just like spending time in the H, sit down, relax, and stay Houston strong.
00:01:23
Speaker
Welcome back. Born on the Bayou Sports, Tim Costello, Scott Barzilla coming to you on the first week of spring training. And just in time, Scott, 70 degrees outside today here in Dallas. The cold weather has parted.
00:01:39
Speaker
ah We could play ball today. We could. You know, I did have an opening question, but you're your column today on the Substack inspired me.
00:01:51
Speaker
You made a reference to Gangnam Style. I did.
Humorous Misheard Song Lyrics
00:01:55
Speaker
And for, you know, for the very first few times, I got admit, I don't hear lyrics well. And so when I heard that song, I thought he was saying he's a condom star.
00:02:07
Speaker
Which, you know, kind of changes the meaning of the ah song just a little bit. So I know. Oh, sexy lady. de o what do What are your favorite wrong lyrics?
00:02:21
Speaker
I mean, I think Tony Danza for Elton John, Tiny Dancer, always a classic. Well, the anger one I heard that was awesome was, you know, Robert Palmer's Addicted to Love. Switched three, might as well face it, you're a dick with a glove.
00:02:40
Speaker
That's a classic. It's one of my favorite Tom Cruise scenes is when he's bartending and cocktailing Fridays and he's got the whole crowd going. He's messing with the volume, you know. Didn't realize that was the height of bartending. He should never left there.
00:02:53
Speaker
And then there's, you know, the, um, uh, always the classic, uh, excuse me while I kiss this guy.
00:03:02
Speaker
I like, you know, so not necessarily the wrong lyrics, but like, you remember in old school where like they're at the wedding and the guys like sneaking F bombs into the song and they're like, what this? What is this?
Comical Wedding Story with Sticks Music
00:03:15
Speaker
And they Oh,
00:03:16
Speaker
Like, what? Like, that's really, like, honestly, that's my favorite. the point where now, like, when I hear, you're like, you're my fucking lady. Like, that's how I hear the song now instead of, like, the way it was meant to be.
00:03:30
Speaker
Now, classic scene here, Tim. We're at my wife's cousin's wedding. And so this is during the ceremony, Tim.
00:03:42
Speaker
During the middle of the ceremony, they did an interlude with music and they're playing sticks. They're playing lady. right on and Well, and I'm just like, and so though there's a hush in the crowd.
00:03:58
Speaker
So I just leaned over to Janet and I went, is that sticks? And everybody around us like two or three pews just started busting out laughing at my line.
00:04:09
Speaker
and And you could tell the groomsmen were looking, you know, we're kind of looking around.
00:04:20
Speaker
that wedding that That marriage did not last. I know you're shocked. You know, it's actually, there's a great, I'm sorry, the wedding didn't, or the marriage didn't last, but there's
Nostalgic Dive into Reno 911 and Movies
00:04:30
Speaker
a great little bit on That 70s Show um where Eric wants to go see a Styx concert, and, like, everyone makes fun of him, right? They're like, Styx? Nobody likes Styx? What are you talking about?
00:04:44
Speaker
And then, like, throughout the whole episode, like, Fez gets caught trying to steal Sticks album because he doesn't want people know he's listening to them. Like Kelso sitting there with headphones listening in the corner to Sticks because he actually likes them.
00:04:56
Speaker
And like it just becomes revealed throughout the whole episode that everybody really kind of secretly likes Sticks. And they're just afraid to admit it admit it out in public. did you Did you ever watch Reno 911?
00:05:07
Speaker
Oh, absolutely. Did you catch the end where they were all like fired and they had like a new cast in? Yes. Did you clutch what catch what Clementine was doing with her life at that point?
00:05:19
Speaker
Wasn't she like a roadie or something like that? Yeah, she was following the Dan. yeah dad She called him the Dan because that's apparently what people call them you know and when you're in the know.
00:05:31
Speaker
ah That was one of the most outrageous movies I've ever seen in my life too was when they did the Reno 911 movie and like the whole town had been infected at a police conference and like The Reno cops are the ones now in charge of the whole city of Miami. It's just like, ah i don't know. like Anytime I get something new, I use the phrase like, you know, new boot goofing.
00:05:53
Speaker
Well, the line we always do is like, I did something. I did something. And I'm sure we'll get moved on some point, but I absolutely love, I can't remember the officer off the my head, but the one that's like,
00:06:07
Speaker
wearing pantyhose and shit under the lingerie when she's doing it. Oh, gosh. Yeah, she was wearing bloomers. yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah. When she's doing, like, the the prostitution stings.
00:06:19
Speaker
Yeah. She's got, like, stuff under the lingerie. The granny panties. Uh-huh. Oh, my God. And then it's that, like, ah the hot officer becomes the mom in the Goldbergs.
00:06:33
Speaker
Oh, yeah, yeah. It was it was rough. You know, and she's been a lot of things. She was in... He is. It's crazy to see her in as much. It's crazy, like, Ted Dangle pops up and shit every now and then, too.
00:06:44
Speaker
Yeah. he He was in that remake of The Odd Couple. He was also in 18 again. I liked him, and I love you, man. Yeah.
00:06:55
Speaker
One of the... one of A very... Not talked about comedy, but a really, really good one i don't know if you've seen that one, Scott. Oh, my. Hey, i I put five stars. next It's Jason Segel and Paul Rudd.
00:07:08
Speaker
And like Paul Rudd doesn't know how to make male friends. And so like he's getting engaged. He got engaged. And then like he has no groomsmen. Like, right. So he's like he's trying to get out there, like make friends in the world.
00:07:21
Speaker
And like Lieutenant Dangle is one of the people he like tries to make friends with. And then like the guy who plays Detective Boyle in Book of Nine-Nine. Yeah. and The guy who tries Andy Samberg plays his brother.
00:07:37
Speaker
It's a great movie. It is. You will laugh a lot. All right, Tim. I guess I guess we do have to move on. um so I thought we had changed the ah thought we were a movie podcast. We're talking about great great movies. yeah but no i was I did watch a couple of clips of Celebrity Jeopardy this evening because just had to cheer myself up you know after some you know ah bad news for our daughter. but yeah I always loved the... you know it was Especially with Burt Reynolds. I'll take 8-10 for $400.
00:08:16
Speaker
I believe the third you're looking for is a petite de jure. I'll do the condom thing for $6,000. I'll take a penis mightier, please. Again, that is the pen is mightier.
00:08:30
Speaker
It's not what your mother thought last night, Shorbek. The rapist for $20. i like I like when Norm MacDonald plays. Oh, you Burt Reynolds? Yeah, that's classic.
00:08:43
Speaker
Yeah, Turd Ferguson. All right, Tim. um ah Before we get into the actual spring training, just to keep with the theme, because you keep stealing my opening question yeah every week. You just come in hot and steal the opening question. We're going into spring training, okay?
00:09:02
Speaker
I
Spring Training Rituals and Key Dates
00:09:03
Speaker
am a a man of ritual. There are certain, you know, during Christmas times, I got to watch a certain number of movies. You know, they have to be seen every year, right? I'm sure you, like me,
00:09:15
Speaker
This is the time of year where you're like, hey, like get my, per for love of the game, watch it. Hey, time for me to watch Bull Durham. what What are you watching right now, Scott?
00:09:27
Speaker
Right now, I'm not watching anything. ah Usually, that my ritual starts really close to opening day. When I was single, I would go through the whole gamut. I would do Major League, Bull Durham, and the Natural, kind of back-to-back-to-back.
00:09:43
Speaker
But, you know, with the family, I don't know if they could put up with that, you know, would it be six hours of pure baseball? I don't know if I'm as as huge a fan as the love of the game as and some of the other ones. That's my number one.
00:09:58
Speaker
my My number one has always been Major League just because the one-liners. I think it's different, right? I think like it's like one's a comedy and one is like, like I don't know, man. like i I truly understand.
00:10:13
Speaker
at this point in my life, giving up the game. Right. yeah like i I, I personally made the decision that Tim Costello is done pursuing the major league baseball lifestyle, whatever you want call it, minor league baseball lifestyle, the dream of major league baseball for love of the, you know, my wife to be, and for love of the game. I love it too much to keep fucking doing what I'm doing.
00:10:37
Speaker
And, um, I don't know. That one just hits home. It's a different feeling. It really is. Yeah, I could see that. i think yeah The other one that I liked, and i don't know if you've watched, is Eight Men Out.
00:10:51
Speaker
Love that movie. Chuck Sheen. i don't know if he was really as good. ah you know You know the guy played Eddie Collins?
00:11:02
Speaker
Do you know what is number one role is? Off the top of my head, would have seen Eight Men Out. He's Mr. Noodle on Sesame Street. I was not a Sesame Street watcher. and i Scotty got freaked out by a giant bird.
00:11:17
Speaker
I don't like birds. i't and I couldn't say anything to be like, oh, it's just big birds. No, big birds get shit on me too, kid. No, we we watched we were at Sesame Street. The only one that we banned in this house was Barney.
00:11:32
Speaker
I watched Barney. we didn't We didn't watch Barney, but we watched a ton of Powerpuff Girls and you know stuff like that. I like Mr. Rogers.
00:11:44
Speaker
was Always positive in the neighborhood, Scott. But I like, but yeah, we don't do as much as the baseball movies now. um i don't know if you're, yeah, we've talked about the rookie before. That's a good every now and then kind of film.
00:11:58
Speaker
I can't put that as part of the... Clear <unk>re Creek Independent School District ruined the rookie for me. Yeah, I can't put that as part of the permanent rotation. Yeah.
00:12:10
Speaker
But, yeah, it's... Yeah, I mean, The Love of Game was good. I just haven't... I guess I haven't watched it all the way through quite as many times as those other movies.
00:12:22
Speaker
John C. Reilly playing The Catch. Oh, yeah, yeah. he's He's underage. Did you ever see Chicago, the movie? I have, but, like, once.
00:12:33
Speaker
He was, like, he did a bit, because he was the the husband of Renee Zellweger. in that movie. And he did a song, Mr. Cellfane, where, I mean, he did a really good job singing that song. He's a talented guy. Like, before him and Will Ferrell started their slapstick phase, which was wonderful, right? Like, nothing negative to say about Step Brothers, Talladega Nights, like, some of the Yeah, some of the... I love the Dewey Cox story.
00:13:01
Speaker
No, Dewey, you don't want to try that. like But no, it's a high bar for comedy, at least, between Talladega Nights and Step Brothers, right? Like, two of the funniest movies of a generation. But you go back 10 years...
00:13:13
Speaker
and And John C. Reilly is fucking cracking skulls with a with a a wooden club in Gangs of New York and and is absolutely killing it. He's on a boat in a perfect storm.
00:13:25
Speaker
You know, he's in Chicago. Like, the guy's unbelievably talented actor. Yeah, absolutely. All right, Tim. we We've added 12 minutes to the podcast, okay? We've filibustered enough here, Tim.
00:13:40
Speaker
um All right. happens well There's no like legitimate sports guy. So my open question was, obviously the answer is not now unless you're, you know, a real idiot, which there are in this world.
00:13:57
Speaker
um When do you start paying attention to spring numbers?
00:14:03
Speaker
I'm going to change my answer from earlier. And I'm going to say it it depends on who the guy is, right? like Brendan Rogers, if Brendan Rogers came in and just raked from day one, like, okay, that's a great sign for me. Right. Like I'm, Hey, he came in ready to play the first week. He's 10 for 25, couple doubles, a Homer, whatever it is. Like I'm paying attention.
00:14:28
Speaker
Cause that's a guy who's trying to earn a roster spot who came in, you know, blocked and loaded. Am I, Penciling him in as my starting second baseman, no. But like I'm paying attention to what Brendan Rodgers is going to do from the jump.
00:14:42
Speaker
um I'm paying attention to what Cam Smith is doing because I haven't seen him before. like I want to see what this guy looks like. But at the same time, I know he's not going to make the everyday roster no matter what he does.
00:14:55
Speaker
right like this he He could hit 750. And I think pretty sure he's still going to spend at least a little time in AAA. Yeah. So I think really the time you actually start to think it matters for sure matters.
00:15:09
Speaker
And even for the ah select five to 10 guys, the singletons of the world, the, you know, Altuve, even where I want to see where he's at like March 20th.
00:15:20
Speaker
Yeah. And I think long-winded answer to get to March 20th, but I'm kind of with you on, you know, the established guys, although we've talked about this, i don't think on this podcast, but the, the previous version,
00:15:33
Speaker
how the Astros really did Shane Reynolds dirty in that last year. Cause know, he came in and threw zeros in spring training. Then they cut him. That was, that was kind of a bizarre decision even back then. And I guess, you know, it made sense cause they were winning baseball team, but I don't know. That was kind of a weird fly ball pitcher too, wasn't he?
00:15:56
Speaker
Yeah, that was kind of weird. Um, I love Shane. He took, Shane took the time. Speaking of spring training with my family and I went to spring training. I've told the story. Shane took the time to come out and like interact with the fans. He sat down, watched three outs with us.
00:16:11
Speaker
Like as a kid, this number of the opening day starter of your hometown team just sat and watched a half inning of baseball with you. Right? Like how could you not love the guy? And, and Scott, he gave out full size candy bars. I know this for a fact that I got one from him.
00:16:25
Speaker
So, um, Obviously, the most memorable spring performance, I think, in our Astros lifetime was Luke Scott. Is there any other ones that come to mind for you that, you know, is like, wow, that guy really just tore it up?
00:16:44
Speaker
Who was the white guy? Reed. Reed. AJ Reed.
00:16:49
Speaker
read a j reid I think was his name. Oh, day yeah, yeah, yeah. know what you're talking about. He was like the the first base one. First base slash pitcher in Kentucky. and yeah, yeah.
00:17:02
Speaker
Never quite made it. trying to think i mean, there's got to be some guys who made the team off of fantastic spring trainings that we're not thinking of. um I think who's the pitcher claimed had sleep apnea and then that's why he figured shit out.
00:17:21
Speaker
well well Well, last year, obviously, Ronell Blanco kind of, you know, came on the scene. Yeah. So, you know, and and obviously, I don't know what more you can do in an opening start of the season.
00:17:34
Speaker
Yeah. I mean, technically, I guess you could call it perfect game, but, you know. That's the one more thing you can do, yeah. Maybe pinch hit and get a homer, too, at the same time. like It's a 0-0 tie, you pull the guy back and be like, I got this, you know, go there. Yeah.
00:17:49
Speaker
Slug a homer for the for the only run of the game. that would the That's what the veterans used to tell Nolan or Ryan back when he would complain about run support. And he says, well, fucking you bet some runs in, dude. ah you you're You're swinging it too, bro. You're over three today.
00:18:07
Speaker
Could you imagine his reaction to that state? Like like in –
00:18:12
Speaker
And a guy who's literally got a famous picture of bleeding from the mouth after theyre getting in a fight with Robin Ventura's ass. I can't believe what you would say to him if you're like, hey, well, you're 0 for 3 today with 3Ks.
00:18:25
Speaker
Yeah, exactly. It'd be like, you're you're basically Leon at that point. I can't keep carrying this team. Come on. But not so you not to react to Cam Smith early on, Scott, but let's Let's talk a little bit about the the young ball player that we got back in and the Kyle Tucker trade because I hadn't seen a lot of him prior to these games here. and i'm not going to say like I'm impressed, but I am going to say like looking at his swing, i see a lot of Jeremy Pena in the way that he is in the batter's box and attacks and drives the ball the other way.
00:19:05
Speaker
Hopefully he can chase less and and keep the strikeouts you know down. But i see I see what looks like a a legitimate prospect though. Well, he's got four plate appearances and two of those are walks.
00:19:18
Speaker
If that tells you anything, obviously four plate appearance is kind of a tiny sample size. He's played two games um now. He had, I think you might've not had today's games up in there. Cause he had two homers today, but I guess his profile in the minors would suggest that he has more plate discipline than opinion.
00:19:38
Speaker
And I think he's, ah his final landing spots can end up being right field. So really the question is, if you're the Astros and he continues to rake at about, say, 400 or 500 batting average, Chaz and Jake did not look very good today.
00:19:57
Speaker
So I think they were combined over five with three Ks. Obviously, that's one day. you know, Altuve has had days where he sucked. But if we're sitting around that March 20th date and Chaz still sucks and Myers still sucks, you and and Smith is still clubbing it 4-500, you got to, you know.
00:20:25
Speaker
Do you think, I mean, do you think there's any legitimate way he he makes the team this season out of spring training? i Like, it i I think it's a really long shot. If you look at where he's been at least.
00:20:37
Speaker
Yeah, only if you were to be a starter. I don't think you're putting them on the team to bench them. Agreed. And so that's only if you're going to pencil them in as your everyday right fielder. But I think one of the things that is encouraging, I think, baseball-wide is, you remember you know you remember the whole flap when Springer got called up?
00:21:00
Speaker
The keeping them down for the extra controllable year bullshit? Yeah, it looks like that trend has pretty much ended. And so teams are more or less, you know, are calling up these guys when they're ready.
00:21:12
Speaker
So if the Astros deem that he's ready, I think that, you know, and they if they think he's good enough to be our everyday right fielder, I think they do it. The question is, is he good enough to be your everyday right fielder?
00:21:26
Speaker
Of course, we don't know that on February 25th. We're probably not going to know that till March 25th.
Evaluating Prospects in Spring Training
00:21:34
Speaker
So, you know, we we got a good month. I tend to agree with you on that, Scott. I think it's, I mean, if we're putting percentages on it I think it's a 5% chance, if anything, you know, somewhere less between five and zero that he's your starting right fielder on opening day, right? Like that leaves him the window of like, if this kid just goes apeshit and as you said, hits 500 and slugs a thousand, like how do you not put that person on your major league roster? I think that would, that would be,
00:22:02
Speaker
bad roster management to at least least let not to at least not let that play out a little bit right but at the end of the day we saw what happened with Jackson Holiday when he was brought up too soon and he you know shit the bed I'd rather him not massage the the time but like this guy who hasn't played above double-a and it was not very much double-a baseball so you know He's seen the gas, like and I believe all his home runs have been on homers, I mean on fastballs, but there's a difference between a double-A curveball and a big-league curveball, and that's where these guys have to have that seasoning along the way, and
00:22:45
Speaker
You know, you can pounce on fastballs early on, but eventually these guys figure you out, and they're going to start throwing you off-speed stuff. They're going start trying to get you to chase, and then you turn into Jeremy Pena where you have absolutely no power, you're just poking balls into right field.
00:23:00
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, I think that's true. What I would wonder, and I'm not an Orioles fan, so I don't know this, I would want to see what, you know, and I could easily look this up, but what Holiday's numbers were in the spring.
00:23:12
Speaker
Because it seems to me like he was – basically gifted the job. That was my, i guess my read on it. I don't know how much it he earned and how much of it was, well, he's gone through all the levels. He's the best prospect in baseball.
00:23:28
Speaker
Here's second base. So, think I mean, he was hitting two 95 ish. I think it was in wherever. Well, in triple A, I'm saying like, he earned the job out of spring training.
00:23:43
Speaker
He flubbed, got sent down. He didn't earn it out of spring training. he He got called up and then got sent down. Okay. Cause I thought he had made the club out of, out of spring training, but
00:23:57
Speaker
I would, if it were me, I would prefer to see him get more seasoning.
00:24:03
Speaker
Cause you know, I just don't see him being an everyday bat. And I would hate to see a guy languishing on the bench just cause he's one of the best five outfielders because Our outfield situation sucks.
00:24:15
Speaker
um We should talk about some of the early spring injuries that we've seen. Pedro Leon is going to be out for while.
00:24:26
Speaker
course, you know, Astros Medical, and you know how famous they are with their disseminating of information. He could have his leg amputated and it would be, you know, right knee discomfort.
00:24:37
Speaker
Um, It would be actually the left leg that was cut off, but the right knee was discomforted from having to carry the tendonitis, you know? Um, but August Sean Dubin and Caleb work are both on the shelf.
00:24:53
Speaker
Um, and then who was the fourth guy was down. I mentioned, uh, so Orton and Dubin are the arms. And I'm trying to remember who was the other guy.
00:25:06
Speaker
um Can't remember the top head, but that that kind of rings up the question because Dubin and Ort were supposed to be guys in the middle of your bullpen.
00:25:18
Speaker
And if they're missing the start of the season, do you want to pick up another reliever?
00:25:26
Speaker
It depends on how are we using Lance McCullers? It depends on How does Forrest Whitley look at spring training?
00:25:38
Speaker
You know, he had a good inning today, as you mentioned. Um, depends on, you know, how we're using JP France guy coming back from injury. Is he going to be a bullpen guy? Is he going a starter?
00:25:50
Speaker
He's not back until July. I don't know, Scott. like I mean, you mentioned Quintana in our conversation. I'd love to have him, but we don't have the money available to us to stay below the CBT to sign Quintana.
00:26:04
Speaker
Um, unless it's some kind of crazy incentive laden deal that um nobody else bites on March 20th. And he says, okay, let's go. Yeah. I think in prove that he's getting a month ramp up, right? Yeah, exactly. And so that's kind of the the sweet spot, as I was kind of pointing out is there's going to be a point where he demands, well, and we don't know what, and and we don't know what Rogers actual salary is because they'll have to make the team in order to get that salary.
00:26:34
Speaker
So we don't know how much is actually available to them. I mean, it could be that Rodgers is getting the bulk of that $4 million dollars that, you know, they're under the current CBT.
00:26:47
Speaker
I don't know. There's also Kyle Gibson. I don't know if he does anything for you. Not a lot, like half chubb. I mean, he you're basically talking about guys that are going to be fit starters. They're not guys that are going to be starting a playoff game for you.
00:27:04
Speaker
So, and the problem is... Quintana's a guy that realistically could start a playoff game for you. or Or, if you go to the playoffs, he could be a piece that you shift towards like a lefty out of the bullpen, too.
00:27:19
Speaker
He's got good stuff. Like, he's a guy that, you know, if you remember this guy, Wade Miley. Yeah, remember Wade. You remember he was really good until those last like two or three starts of the year. he went I always wonder what the fuck happened to him. I think he was tipping pitches is what I heard.
00:27:38
Speaker
Okay. Um, but they, they're at a similar point where they're not going to beat you with stuff because Quintana is, I think 40. I mean, he's not bringing heat anymore.
00:27:52
Speaker
Um, so he's just a good, solid lefty, kind of a left-handed version of what, um, Odorizzi was, you know, a guy that can give you four or five innings, you know, thank you, hand the ball to the to the bullpen.
00:28:09
Speaker
um So that's not a guy you want starting a playoff game. But like you said, he could shift to the pen in the playoffs.
00:28:18
Speaker
But again, it's what he wants. He turned down a deal for the Pirates. So clearly he's not ready. to sign now. He's going to have to wait, you know, wait out, you know, for the market to come back to where teams want to spend money.
00:28:33
Speaker
I mean, and and let's not like completely shit on this guy, right? Like he had a two, nine, three era combined in 2022, three, five, seven in 2023, a three, seven, five last year on the Mets two and a half war.
00:28:48
Speaker
um I mean, he's had some really, really good years. He struggled in with the angels, but they suck. Um, had a great start to his career with the White Sox, wasn't as good in Chicago. He's a good, he's a good not great player late in his career.
00:29:03
Speaker
He's played for Pittsburgh before, so I could see why he wouldn't want to go back to that dogshit organization. And we've discussed how they treat some of their players. So if you're a guy late in your career and you know that this organization doesn't exactly value players and you're like, why would I don' want to take a low-end deal to go like be with of the worst teams in the league and like ride – the shitty broken down plane for major league.
00:29:26
Speaker
And, you know, like basically really the story of major league, right? Like, why would I want to do that? Like someone will come calling. If not, I've made a lot of money in my life. I think that's probably the last statement you just said, I think is where he's at.
00:29:40
Speaker
And unless he's spending money like Patrick Ewing, I mean, he's made a lot of money in his life. He doesn't absolutely have to do this anymore. so you know, he's waiting around for the right opportunity, which, you know, could be asterisk.
00:29:56
Speaker
He's a guy, man. When he was with the White Sox, I was like, man, let's trade for Jose Quintana. Yeah. how really, i mean, you talk about he is like probably the embodiment of Jake Taylor, you know, where, man, wish we'd had him two years ago.
00:30:11
Speaker
Well, maybe four years ago. Maybe six, ah you know. But, yeah, the Angels – They were joking about it on the radio today. Could you imagine them redoing the Angels in the outfield?
00:30:24
Speaker
You know, like Christopher Lloyd and all the Angels coming down, looking at the team going like, we can't do anything with this. yeah
00:30:33
Speaker
Maybe we could take on like the the twins or something because this team sucks. Is there, you know, is there anybody else? ah Padres or priests, could like answer some prayers over there.
00:30:49
Speaker
All right, onmi that's let's talk about something a little bit more exciting, Scott.
Celebrating Houston Cougars' Achievements
00:30:54
Speaker
Last night, my Houston Cougs won their second straight Big 12 title, and in doing so, they made history.
00:31:03
Speaker
The first time since 1922 and 1923, when the Idaho men's basketball team won the Big Pacific in their first two years in conference. This is the first time a team has joined a basketball conference and won the league two years in.
00:31:18
Speaker
twice. So basically, first two years here, we own this shit. You're bringing in the Big Pacific. That's, you know... Hey, they brought it in last night. You should have seen that squad. I don't think they could have beat me.
00:31:31
Speaker
oh Is that like that at SNL where they had Jordan as the first black Harlem Globetrotter? Did you ever see that one? No, I didn't. Where, you know, the har Harlem Globetrotters when they were all white, and so they're just, you know, standing around the center circle, just passing it back and forth during the game.
00:31:48
Speaker
And then, you know Jordan starts like dunking and shit and and and and nobody likes him. And so they they show him, you know, going back in and doing the passing around the center of it.
00:32:00
Speaker
But, yeah yeah, I have to hand it to him. Terrific season, obviously. Terrific couple of seasons, you know, from the Cougs. What's going to be interesting, and they've mentioned this on national radio recently,
00:32:14
Speaker
There are about six schools that have the resume to be a number one seed in the NCAA tournament, and the Cougs are one of them. So kind of raises the question of, number one, how badly do you want a number one seed?
00:32:27
Speaker
And number two, you know, what what needs to happen for them to get that number one seed? I think if the Cougs went out the regular season um and win at least one tournament game,
00:32:41
Speaker
there's, they're definitely in the hunt for it because I believe it's Tennessee has to play like Auburn and Alabama or something like that. One of them has, one of the other teams has a really, really tough finish. They have to play two of the top six teams in their final three games or two of those games. And so um Duke's got to play North Carolina and North Carolina is fighting for a playoff.
00:33:06
Speaker
I mean, a chance to even get in the tournament. So I definitely think there's a chance, probably like 15%, 20% is where I put it if I'm in a gambling mood. mean, I don't really care as much as, um you know, but i'd I'd rather be a two with the weakest one, you know, than I would be with a one with a stack two.
00:33:29
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, I think it's it's, you know, obviously if you're in that four or five slot, it's kind of six to one, a dozen the other. Yeah, that's kind of where I – if the Cougs are in the 4-5 overall, feel that's probably where we deserve to be.
00:33:44
Speaker
Like, if you look at where this team started, right, we lost three games early on um all one neutral court. But, you know, you lost – I think they will say Juwan Roberts has been the soulless program. But to me – um You know, our our point guard, Jamal Shedd, from last year and the previous three seasons before, that was a heart and soul that team for four fucking years.
00:34:07
Speaker
And you lost that to, you know, graduation. And to to bring a guy in as a transfer and say, hey, here's the keys, it took a little bit. But Milo Uzon is absolutely fantastic. He hit 22 points, I think, last night. ah big Big three at the end to ice it. I think it was 20 points.
00:34:25
Speaker
um The Cougs still play lockdown defense. It is physical. They rebound. They dive for loose balls. They don't turn the ball over at a high rate.
00:34:36
Speaker
And you're going to have to win a game in the trenches that if you want to beat them. like You are not going to force the University of Houston to play your game. You are going to have to beat them at their game. It is what it is. You're not going to get the Cougs to play an 80-75 game. They're going to keep it the and it's going to get real fucking...
00:34:55
Speaker
sixty-five at the most and it's gonna get real fucking real fucking physical down there. Yeah. And I, I think they were saying that they're, they're ahead of at least Florida.
00:35:06
Speaker
And I think the other sec, Tennessee and quad one wins, whatever the heck that means. Yeah. This is a lot of, I mean, my opinion, Scott, correct I think the big 12 is one of the two best basketball conferences in America, right? Like,
00:35:26
Speaker
but I think it is the best, but the SEC is also very top-heavy, and it's very good. If you win one of the best two conferences and you win the thing, why would that not make you a number one seed?
00:35:42
Speaker
If they beat Iowa State, that's another quad one win. We did beat Iowa State. So they beat them again. the second so Then they just beat Tech, who's not bad.
00:35:54
Speaker
Number six. yeah so No, they were number 10. We were number six. So, you know, that's another quad one win. So, yeah, I mean, they've clinched a tie, which, I mean, to use the golf term, they're dormy.
00:36:09
Speaker
um So, yeah, I don't know. I don't know that the conference tournaments are that important. They're just kind of – they're awfully fluky. I mean, they're for teams to get hot, right, like for teams who – on the bubble and, and for those leagues who you don't get an automatic bid for winning your league, like the big sky, but you get one for winning your, your league's tournament. So it actually puts some preference on that, but yeah, for like a team like university Houston or team like Alabama or, you know, Florida or Tennessee, someone of that nature, like you just need to show that, you know, we'll win one game. We're here. We'll compete.
00:36:50
Speaker
And then, okay, it is what it is. Yeah. and you just train rubve scott cause I know you're not a, you're not a Cougar. So that one was more for me, but let's talk about the Houston Rockets basketball team and where the fuck is Fred Van
Impact of Fred Van Vleet's Absence
00:37:03
Speaker
Fleet.
00:37:03
Speaker
This is, you know, what was originally listed as a day-to-day injury and you know what we're on ah month, two months on this of this missing missing an action move from our starting point guard. And, you know, we, we need that senior leadership on the floor.
00:37:20
Speaker
Yeah, and I think our big goal, and and we stated this even when we were the two seed, is we don't want to get into the play-in. We want to win the top six seeds.
00:37:32
Speaker
And right now they're sitting at the four seed, just barely in front of the five. um I haven't looked at tonight's score lately with the Milwaukee Bucks, but they were up one.
00:37:48
Speaker
They were up one. They were up on the jazz a couple of nights ago and then just completely disintegrated in the fourth quarter. You could blame that on a back-to-back, but I blame that on Van Vliet not being there.
00:38:02
Speaker
They do not have a point guard on this team other than Van Vliet, which we talked about this before. We talked about, you know, what this meant for Rafael Stone. I mean, I guess, you know, the buyout market can still be a thing.
00:38:16
Speaker
Um, But, my God, I mean, I think Patrick Beverly got bought out of his contract over overseas, if, you know, you're interested in that. but Always.
00:38:28
Speaker
but i mean, this team desperately needs veteran court point guard play, and they just don't have it. I mean, like, right now, on the court is Eason, Thompson, Brooks, Sangoon, and Jalen Green.
00:38:44
Speaker
Not a point guard on the court. Aaron Holliday got 11 minutes tonight. That is the only guy you could even call a point guard who's gotten any run. Edmund Thompson is not a point guard.
00:38:55
Speaker
Edmund Thompson is a playmaker. He's a fantastic defender. He is um amazing drive-and-dish player. But he is young, and he is not a point guard that with two minutes left in the game, and you've got to execute, and you've got to make the right pass,
00:39:12
Speaker
You've got to know how long to hold the ball to run the clock out. You've got to know what to do in those situations. And that's why Fred Van Vliet is there. You know, you not only lose that that leadership, you lose spacing.
00:39:24
Speaker
He's a pretty good shooter. I just want to get to the point. I want to see a playoff series. I want to see a playoff series with everybody healthy. And I want to, you know, be able to poke holes in this roster. Yeah.
00:39:37
Speaker
to see what needs to improve. One thing I will say is Jabari Smith has shown good energy off the bench since he's come back tonight. looks like, you know, through of the fourth quarter, he's got 13 points and nine boards off the bench.
00:39:51
Speaker
I mean, that beast of poking the eye with a sharp stick. I think. The only bench production, literally. I mean, Tari's got 12. So between him and Tari, that's just 25 points off the bench for those two guys. That's it.
00:40:06
Speaker
Yeah, I really like what Amen Thompson brings, but he has a specific role, I think, where he excels. And the point guard role is not it.
00:40:18
Speaker
He needs to be the guy that runs the floor, defends, finishes on the break. He's kind of the easy bucket guy. I mean, even even the Heedles needed a guy like Mario Chalmers to slow it the fuck down every now and then and and make it so LeBron and Dwayne way. Don't have to bring the ball up the court every single possession, right?
00:40:44
Speaker
Even Kobe Bryant had Derek fucking Fisher to play point guard because you can't have Kobe Bryant initiating every offensive set. You can't, it's not, but it's not a great way to run offense.
00:40:58
Speaker
They were mentioned this too. Think about this. Van Vliet's the only guy, I think he's the only guy on that roster with a ring. And so he's a guy that, you know. Jeff Green not have one? Not that I can recall.
00:41:11
Speaker
Not the one that he's he's played an integral part of. um And Van Vliet was a starter on that Toronto Raptors team. So, you know, that's yeah that's leadership and that's knowledge that is just not He have a ring, by the way. He got one with the Nuggets.
00:41:30
Speaker
Not that he earned. you know he he No, he he played integral bench roll for the Nuggets. Gave him a solid like seven, eight minutes a night. Wow.
00:41:43
Speaker
I'm overwhelmed. But no, Van Vliet's a guy, I think that he has the pelts on the wall that he can watch film with these guys and go like, hey man, what the fuck were you doing there?
00:41:54
Speaker
You know, this is what you do in this situation. You know, Jalen, what are you thinking here? You know, this is what you got to do. these are I mean, these guys are surviving right now just on pure athleticism.
00:42:08
Speaker
there's there's There's very little practical experience on the floor. i mean, even Dylan Brooks, I mean, I love him as a gnat, as a guy that can get under the skin of an opposing wing.
00:42:24
Speaker
But he's not the smartest offensive basketball player that's ever lived. I mean, you'd have to admit that. No, he's not. I mean, he's there. He's your muscle, man. Like, he's the guy who makes sure you can't come through the paint without catching a forearm shiver, right? Like, he's Shane Battier.
00:42:42
Speaker
He's the hand in the face the whole time that you're trying to shoot. Like, that is what he is. He is not Chris Paul out there, you know, doing his thing. Like, that's not what he's here to be.
00:42:53
Speaker
um But, again, like, that just goes into you have to have that guy. It doesn't have to be the highest paid player on the roster. It doesn't have to be your best player. But you've got to have a guy whose only thought process is we need a good shot this possession.
00:43:09
Speaker
I've got to find it. It doesn't have to be me, but I've got to find us a good look somewhere. And we've got I've got to deliver the ball to make sure that we get a good look. Either I'm delivering it to the hole or I'm delivering it to one of my teammates, but we're going to get a good look here.
00:43:23
Speaker
And and more we don't always have that. It's like situational basketball as well. Because if you remember that Brooklyn Nets game where Eamon Thompson's throwing it out of nowhere as an inbounds pass.
00:43:36
Speaker
I mean, this is where you need a guy on the floor and, okay, we're up. All we have to do is not shit the bed. Here's what we need to do, guys. um I mean, you need that guy.
00:43:50
Speaker
Desperately. Desperately do we need that guy, Scott. You know what else we need, I think, is to start giving some awards away. I think it's it's time for you too to hand out an award that you initiated, you created, and
Critique of Houston Texans' Management
00:44:09
Speaker
made your own. It's horse's ass of the week time, Scott.
00:44:12
Speaker
All right. So for my horse's ass, it pains me to say this. It's the team we didn't talk about tonight. We saved it. Yeah, we saved it for this. It's your Houston Texans.
00:44:25
Speaker
Now, if you coached for the Patriots or you went to John Carroll University, hey, yeah you call up Nick Casario, he'll find you a job.
00:44:38
Speaker
But here's my question, Tom. um I'm going to ask two questions that we can spend a little bit of time on. Number one, looking at the Patriots,
00:44:50
Speaker
Who would you say is the most responsible for their success?
00:44:56
Speaker
a I mean, Bill Belichick, right? But if you go the one common denominator, it's Tom Brady. It's fair. I mean, when Tom Brady left, what did the Patriots become?
00:45:12
Speaker
They became very average or worse. What has every coach under Bill Belichick gone on to do in the NFL, Tim?
00:45:22
Speaker
Not great. I mean, Bill O'Brien, you could claim as the most successful. Probably. yeah from the and And as you know, a Houston Texans fan, that's like, I have to bite my lip just to say that much.
00:45:36
Speaker
So my question is, why are we bringing that? And Nick Casario, I think has been successful and he's been successful since he joined forces with D'Amico Ryan's. When they put their heads together and they put drafts together.
00:45:51
Speaker
That's when they started being successful. When Nick Casario came in and said, I'm going to do it the New England way. Well, the New England way only works if you have Tom Brady. So this whole game plan offense, that only works when you have Tom Brady.
00:46:08
Speaker
This whole, like, we're going to bring in our coaches. You have, like, ah Josh McDaniel's brother, Ben McDaniels, who I think has survived through, what, three coaches? And what is he? See the running spec coach? Is that what he is? think so. Yeah.
00:46:24
Speaker
How good have our running backs been since Aaron Foster left?
00:46:30
Speaker
Yeah, not great. ah I mean, yeah. Joe Mixon. I really like Joe Mixon. What do you think of all the backs behind Joe Mixon, Tim? Pretty terrible. That's, you know, so let's take a look at the wide receivers.
00:46:44
Speaker
So, Nico Collins developed into a number one wide receiver. Okay, that's that's bang up jobs right a how much has John Mechie developed? None.
00:46:55
Speaker
How much has Xavier Hutchinson developed? Medium. What did Tank Dell do between year one and year two? Survive being shot. But as a football player... I mean, he was recovering from two different injuries. I don't think he had a chance to really grow as a football player when...
00:47:14
Speaker
You tore your you broke your leg and and then you got shot. Right. Like you didn't have any chance to, like, grow. You were rehabbing for six straight months. We got our tight ends coach who stays.
00:47:26
Speaker
What do you think of our tight ends, Tim? Terrible. And then, of course, they promote the assistant offensive line coach because, you know, the offensive line did so well.
00:47:39
Speaker
That guy should teach seminars on how to interview whoever the assistant. No, he should give, he should give a seminar on his interview that he gave to the team that allowed him to stay after being the assistant coach of the worst offensive line I've ever seen in my fucking life.
00:47:55
Speaker
Like it all, they all must've like got together and been like in a corner and be like, Hey, everybody turn on Bobby Slick. Hey, by the way, like, everybody in here knows it was Bobby, right? Like we're all going to say in our interviews that we try to suggest other answers and that Bobby Slug wouldn't let us.
00:48:10
Speaker
But see, here's the key. Where did he coached him before he coached at the Texas?
00:48:15
Speaker
Who? The now offensive line coach.
00:48:20
Speaker
Dirk's cousin, Nowitzki. I think he was, no, I'm sorry. It's it's Greg's cousin, Popovich. And I think he was with the Pats, wasn't he? And then Carroll University.
00:48:32
Speaker
Yes. Yeah. It's, you see a pattern here. i mean, i think John Carroll university is going to bring their, their alumni dinner down here to Houston because most the alumni is down here working for the Texans.
00:48:46
Speaker
You know, and and here's the thing, right? Is Bobby slow it to blame for some of it? Sure. is he misusing tank Dell? I think there's there's probably a pretty good case to be made for that.
00:49:00
Speaker
Is he misusing John Mechie? Yeah, there's a pretty good case for that. But you can't tell me over the course of, say, the last 10 years, like, look at Brevin Jordan.
00:49:11
Speaker
What has Brevin Jordan done outside of, like, one 80-yard touchdown against the Cleveland Browns in the playoffs? Oh, he's a nice blocker, Scott.
00:49:22
Speaker
He's a nice blocker, and he catches passes in December. That's why we call him Mr. December, because usually he's he's inactive until December. He's He's fast. but He's got great athletic skills.
00:49:34
Speaker
So my point is, is that we did extend him to, we did extend them. And and here's the thing. Either you got that way wrong or you got coaches that can't develop shit.
00:49:46
Speaker
And see, here's the thing that kills me. Look on the defensive side of the ball. What happened between year one and year two for Henry Toetella? Growth. A lot of growth. What happened for Will Anderson between year one and year two?
00:50:01
Speaker
Massive growth. And then what happened in their rookie years for Kamari Laster and Kalen Bullock? Yeah. I mean, different players from day one to final game of the season.
00:50:13
Speaker
So, obviously, when they ran back to defensive coaches, I'm like, yeah, those guys can coach up guys because we were the sixth. We were sixth in yards.
00:50:25
Speaker
We were sixth in rushing yards, 11th in passing yards, 11th in rushing yards. And fifth in turnovers. The defense does its job. So the defensive coaches are doing their job.
00:50:38
Speaker
When you're in the bottom third in the league in offense, I'm sorry, that's not just a, well, fire the offensive coordinator. Okay, rest is good. Let's go.
00:50:49
Speaker
No.
00:50:52
Speaker
I mean, we've talked about he didn't allow Stroud to change protection at the line scrimmage. you know It was basically like, hey, you block this side, you block that side. And I get Scheme was terrible.
00:51:04
Speaker
It was absolutely terrible. But I'm with you. like I wanted to start basically completely from scratch on this offensive line. like Keep Tunzel, keep Howard. Maybe that's it.
00:51:16
Speaker
like If you could have found a way to like get rid of everybody else but your tackles, I would have been like, okay, let's go. Because they all fucking sucked. So at the end of the day, to hear that We're just going to coach up what we got with the same coaches minus just one guy, two guys.
00:51:35
Speaker
you know And I've heard rumors that the offensive line coach didn't want to be there, and he had to be talked out of retirement to come back. Why? You're telling me you couldn't find – Anyone better than someone one who didn't want to be there anymore?
00:51:50
Speaker
Like, that was the best option of who wanted to come to town to work with you? Like, again, Bruce Matthews is a 25-minute fucking drive away. There's talent galore.
00:52:00
Speaker
Like, Chester Pitts is fucking chilling on Sports Radio 610. He would have been better. Anybody would have been fucking better than a guy who's like, I really don't want to be here anymore, but they offered me pay raise to stay, so why not one more year?
00:52:15
Speaker
And how good was that offensive line in 2023? Not good either. i mean, the rushing attack was terrible. And so that's what kills me, Tim. is ah If you're begging, if you had the number one offense in football and you're ah offensive line coach and you're renowned, like you're the Philadelphia Eagles and you're renowned for being a great offensive line.
00:52:40
Speaker
Sure. talk the guy out of retirement. But when your offensive line is middle of the pack at best, at the very best. That's generous.
00:52:52
Speaker
why Why are we even, why are we, you know, twisting the guy's arm? I mean, that's the guy on your scramble team that three putts like every other green. You're like, please be on this guy.
00:53:04
Speaker
he's the play He's got a nice boom box and a good fucking playlist. Keep him around, D'Amico. Yeah. Please keep him on my scramble team. We need his putting. No, you really don't. He always brings fireball, though.
00:53:19
Speaker
You got to bring something. You got to bring something. Yeah. All right. Who you got? he's not bringing He's not bringing a scheme. We'll see. um I kind of was in agreement with you on this one this week, Scott. It's pretty abysmal.
00:53:36
Speaker
um But I will. I've got so many. people want to have tips. I'm going kind of reverse engineer it. um and And the people who are criticizing the the ball strike challenge system, like, fuck it, you're all dumb.
00:53:52
Speaker
Like, this is what we've wanted. Like, this is like what we've been saying, like the whole time is like, hey, that was a strike. I'd like to see that again. Like, hey, oh, it takes two fucking seconds. Awesome. So if you think that that is is wrong. and And the people saying, we're taking a human element out of the game.
00:54:09
Speaker
You're my horse's ass. Cause at the end of the day, getting the call, right. Is much more important than whether or not we hurt the feelings of fucking last DS or Angel Hernandez or fucking any of these other guys who fucking suck at the end of the day. Like there was no accountability for major league umpires. They have the strongest union in America and they literally suck at their jobs on a regular basis.
00:54:34
Speaker
And now we all know, like, because of the way baseball games are broadcast, we knew it. There's the box. And now we have a solution. And the people are still arguing against a solution. They're just fucking morons, man. they Didn't Angel Hernandez retire or something or get fired? i I think he probably did. Last year was probably his last year because he didn't want to have this, like, show him up.
00:54:54
Speaker
Oh, yeah, they did last year because they basically, for like a month or six weeks, he didn't umpire anything. And also they announced he was out. I think it was kind of a weird kind of deal, but I'm with you on this one.
00:55:08
Speaker
i mean, strike zone and just to see the number of egregious calls that get made. My favorite I saw this week was I saw this kid um and for a University of Hawaii take a walk to load the bases and is jacked because he got a walk to load the bases and And the umpire tossed him.
00:55:36
Speaker
You know, because he kind of just threw his bat aside was like, yeah, and the umpire tossed him. I mean, just the the amount of power these guys have and they wield in all three leagues, really, but baseball in particular is just insane.
00:55:52
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, the umpires in baseball are ridiculous. We've talked about it for too long.
Accountability in Baseball Umpiring
00:55:57
Speaker
God forbid you offend this guy, and now there's some accountability, and there's still people on the internet who want to have an issue with the fact that you know what a strike is, and that wasn't a strike, and I'd just like you to look at that, and yeah, so those people are my horse's ass this week, Scott.
00:56:16
Speaker
All right. Let's tip a cap or two, shall we? It sounds like you got multiple ones, so do you want to... I've narrowed it.
00:56:43
Speaker
Finally, the New York Yankees have changed their godforsaken stupid fucking facial hair rule and are allowing well-maintained beards for their players now.
00:56:58
Speaker
And I am not a guy who goes around looking at a tip a cap to the New York Yankees organization, but I am going to say it's about fucking time and I tip my cap for you finally getting with the rest of us and changing your stupid ass policy.
00:57:17
Speaker
Did you see that Don Magley has now rejoined the Yankees? Did he really? Yeah. It seems like maybe that coincided with the at the news. yeah I loved, I loved that storyline from the Simpsons where he kept, you know, shaving his sideburns to the point, you know, it's too, it's too long. I won't let you fly. They said like in the press conference, they can't imagine that it ever swayed people from coming there.
00:57:41
Speaker
But I have to imagine it's the opposite, right? Like if I'm a top-level talent, right? If I am – if Tim Costello is the best first baseman or, you know, even like a top five first baseman in baseball, and I'm a free agent, and I've got four choices, and they're all pretty similar money, right? I've got Red Sox, Yankees, Mets, and Cleveland Indians, okay?
00:58:06
Speaker
Okay. I'm throwing the Yankees out because you're making me shave my beard immediately. Like, this is part of me. And if you don't want me, then why would I want to sign with your team and that you force me to be somebody I'm not?
00:58:19
Speaker
Like, I hate shaving. I would never fucking work somewhere again that makes me shave every day. Johnny Caraba had a clean shaven rule at the Caraba's original restaurant in 2017. thought it was the stupid fucking thing ever.
00:58:32
Speaker
Like, it We're fucking waiters. why do Why do we need to be clean shaven to be to be a waiter? I am literally waiting on you. I can't do that with a well-maintained beer, Johnny.
00:58:44
Speaker
know. It's just, just it's oh it's done. It's stupid. Like, um I can't believe it lasted this long. But again, hat tip for finally being done with it. Yeah, the tact I would take is I don't know if it would make my decision, but here's the thing.
00:59:01
Speaker
Think about how superstitious these guys are. I mean, these guys will wear the same socks for like weeks at a time. They won't wash certain things, you know, that if they have a good day.
00:59:13
Speaker
How superstitious are they going to be about their facial hair? I can't imagine, you know, and I would, I am not going to say Alex Verdugo sucked because of the facial hair rule.
00:59:25
Speaker
But if you're not comfortable, you're not going to be at your best.
00:59:33
Speaker
Yeah, I couldn't agree more. Could not agree more. All right, Scott, who do you have? Hat tip, I'm going to go with Sam Houston State University. That's my parents' alma mater.
00:59:45
Speaker
Ann finished her last audition there this last Saturday. And, you know, two things have happened since then that, you know, just make me can me fall in love with this university. Number one, one of the people that was on her committee right afterwards seeked her out.
01:00:03
Speaker
and told her how well she thought she did in her audition. And that's obviously not something that, you know, they have to do. i mean, I wouldn't expect somebody to come out and say, like, you you sucked and do like the Simon Cowell thing.
01:00:18
Speaker
But, yeah you know, you would think like, you know, discretion is a better form of valor in that instance. But to sit there and and seek her out and to say, you know, how well she did and then turn around on Monday and emailed her.
01:00:31
Speaker
before she's even being and accept officially accepted to the School of Music, basically saying, we loved you and we hope you choose our university. Well, you've kind of tipped your hat there that that you're going to accept her at the School of Music.
01:00:47
Speaker
I don't think you would sit there and send her that email and then go, no, we we decided, no, we're not going to take you. um So, you know, and they they ran a good, a really good question and answer session afterwards.
01:00:59
Speaker
So really professionally done. Obviously it's for, it's down to between same East state and LSU for her two great schools, great music schools, and they both treated her very well. So it's going to be a hard decision, but I like to tip my cat to both those schools. Cause they've really done this right.
01:01:21
Speaker
Nothing like being wanted, Scott. So you don't always want to dance. but you want to be asked to dance, right? you She may not want to go to all these schools, but it's nice to know that they want her to come to them. So hopefully she gets exactly what she's looking for and and is very happy um where she ends up.
01:01:37
Speaker
All right, Scott, it's that time to give away that final award that everybody just loves so, so much. Who do you have for us this week as your scumbag of the week?
01:01:51
Speaker
I hate to do this, Tim. but I'm going to have to do this two weeks in a row and go kind of on the political current affairs route. My scumbag is MSNBC.
01:02:04
Speaker
And I don't know if you're aware of why they'd be my scumbag, but last night Joy Reid gave her very last telecast of the readout.
01:02:16
Speaker
They have summarily more or less fired her. And why have they fired her? I'm sure they're going to come up with all kinds of reasons. They're going to give like, oh, the ratings weren't very good or oh, no, no, no, no.
01:02:32
Speaker
The reason is because she had the temerity to criticize the president. And MSNBC is going the same route that CNN is going, the same route that, you know, a lot of these outlets are going, which is we're going sane wash the president.
01:02:48
Speaker
Because we really want access and we don't want them to say anything mean. Well, guess what happened? President of the United States, right after they made that decision, sent out a tweet on his shitty little app talking about, oh, no talent, Joy Reid. Oh, how pathetic MSNBC is. And it's like, so all of your posturing, all of your we're going to try to placate him is not going to placate him.
01:03:16
Speaker
No. It's never well. So you might as well tell the truth. And if you if MSNBC wants to know why their ratings are down, ratings are down because they're not telling the truth.
01:03:28
Speaker
And so you're never going to get conservatives to watch MSNBC. They're not going to do it They're not going to do it because you become more moderate.
01:03:39
Speaker
The only people that would watch MSNBC are going to be progressives and progressives aren't going to watch it anymore because. You know, you have Morning Joe and going and Krasinski going down there to kiss the ring.
01:03:54
Speaker
You know, you're you're shaking up the the nighttime lineup to you know make it more palatable, you know, to to our dear leader. And I don't even know who you know who our dear leader is anymore. It's it's really I think it's really Trump, but I guess is it more palatable to Vlad Putin? I think that's you know kind of where things are standing right now.
01:04:16
Speaker
I'm sorry, this is a time. in And before anybody sits there on both sides this thing, I never once argued for any Fox News host to be fired.
01:04:30
Speaker
I never said Tucker Carlson should be fired, at least not on air. I never said that Bill O'Reilly should be fired. I don't think that i got Sean Hannity.
01:04:43
Speaker
I mean, I hate him, but I don't think he should be fired. I don't think that Laura Ingraham should be fired. i mean, if Fox News wants to do that, that that's their call. But I'm not calling to censor them because I don't like what they say.
01:04:59
Speaker
So why are we kowtowing to this dipshit that we have in the Oval Office? I could tell you why, Scott, because he released today that um he won't allow certain outlets to have access to the White House anymore.
01:05:16
Speaker
He will have a rotating group of mainstream media and everything else is going to be new age media. Like I very expect very soon to see Joe Rogan sitting front row at a press conference. Like that's the fucking Alex Jones is going to get a press pass pretty soon. firelier There's zero doubt in my mind that ladder with Crowder's there and fucking dipshit Shapiro and all those guys are, you know, the, the gerbils of, of 20, 25.
01:05:43
Speaker
are going to churn out propaganda for him. And they did this because they thought they could still get their press passes and they could still get their access, as you said. and he still fucking took it away from him. He didn't even, didn't only stop it eviscerating her.
01:05:56
Speaker
He took it away. And I, and I would like all those people at Fox News fired for lying on air. Like, I think you and I would agree if you are a news anchor and you lie to your audience, that's a fireable offense at the end of the day. Like you should be fired immediately.
01:06:13
Speaker
for that. but That's me. i give you the whole thing of like I don't know if you ever watched the newsroom, but like the whole thing was they had to get back trust of the audience back after they lied to you. They don't fucking care.
01:06:27
Speaker
hey They'll never lose the trust of the audience. You know what they do to solve the problem of lying to you? Fucking tell a bigger lie because you bought the first one. Did you ever watch the movie Real Genius? Which movie?
01:06:39
Speaker
Real Genius? No. So it's Val Kilmer way back in the early 80s. It might i don't know if it's his first movie. It might be his first major role.
01:06:51
Speaker
But, you know, they're at this university and they're building, you know, this laser that's going to be turned into a weapon or whatever. But one of the funnier scenes is you see, you know, the first scene you appear into this class and it's a standard class with the professor teaching and everybody else in there taking notes.
01:07:10
Speaker
The next time they show the class weeks later is the professor teaching in a bunch of boom boxes recording the lecture. And then the last thing you see is the professor has taped the lecture and the boom boxes are recording the tape lecture.
01:07:27
Speaker
And so, I mean, that's where I think the press needs to go with this thing. So, like, we don't need to send it and we don't need to send anybody. We're just going to put a tape recorder into the White House press briefing room.
01:07:41
Speaker
We're going to record your shit so that we can report the shit that you say. But, you know, why does it matter if we ask questions? You're going to lie to us anyway. So, i mean, you can report them and you can, you know, if if you're wanting to be like a Stephen Colbert or Daily Show and sit there and make fun of. We saw this hilarious comedian who said, like, he's not going to argue with conservatives anymore. He's going to try to out dumb them.
01:08:07
Speaker
Is that the Dave Anthony one I sent you? Or he's like, we're just going to join Canada? No, no, this is a different guy. But it was hilarious because he's like, he's doing the example of this guy coming up and next him at the car place and they're watching Fox News. Hey, man, that abortion, you know, some really bad shit.
01:08:25
Speaker
And he said, yeah, that's why I'm pro-gay. yeah What? You're pro-gay? And he says, well, you think about it. Gays get fewer abortions than any other group.
01:08:37
Speaker
That's why I'm pro gay. And so the guy would just sit there and leave him alone. He's like all confused. He's like, that's how you deal with it. yeah You you just try to out double. That's pretty good. that a so A comedian ally has similar approaches. Like, you know, anytime they say stuff like that, like, well, California's just going to join Canada. We're going to be, we're going to be the lower province of Canada going forward. Like if you're going to get Greenland, look, okay, Canada, here we come.
01:09:05
Speaker
Like Minnesota, part of Canada, uh, Michigan, part of Canada. Here we go. Like, it's just, if we can redraw maps too, right? Like my, my kids scribbled some, uh, crayon on, on, uh, a piece of paper today. If I laid it over the map, that could be the new country guidelines. Hey, everything she would have scribbled is now Canada.
01:09:28
Speaker
Can we at least monetize this thing? Can we call it like the, can we call it the Chick-fil-A what a golf? and like sell corporate sponsorships for these different things. Like call it the, you know, instead of the Mississippi river, it's the Kroger river. Wouldn't that be fun? We are now, if you look, you're in the air. All right, passengers. If you now look out the left starboard side of the window, you will see the beautiful shining shores of the Whataburger. What a catch Gulf of America.
01:09:58
Speaker
And again, in about 20 minutes, we'll be making our way into the Long John Silver's Pacific Ocean stretch of the portion. um Don't forget to try their coleslaw.
01:10:10
Speaker
They took out the pickles. like no like Yeah, I mean, you could you could pay for, i mean, you know, we're trying to cut government waste, you know, instead of firing all these park rangers, put there and say, hey, the National Park Rangers have been brought to you by Kroger's.
01:10:26
Speaker
Kroger's National Parks. Hey, Bass Pro is a great opportunity for your, Bass Pro is you know, great opportunity to pay for the park rangers. Hey, the national park rangers are brought to you by Bass Pro and Academy Sports and Outdoors.
01:10:39
Speaker
Academy. the art The artist is formerly known as Yosemite. else Now Yosemite Sam brought to you by Warner Brothers.
01:10:52
Speaker
You can ride the Yosemite Sam ride in the Yosemite National Park. where That's what we've been missing. Some roller coasters. Oh, fuck, man. This sucks. All right. um I'm to take it a little political this week as well, Scott.
01:11:07
Speaker
um You're Catholic. I'm Catholic. um Who would you say is like the head of the Catholic church? Last time I checked, it was the Pope, Tim. The Pope, right?
01:11:20
Speaker
Yeah. And so I would say that if you start like beef or like talk shit about the Pope, you're probably not a good representation of Catholic values, right? Like if you openly shit talk the head of the religion.
01:11:40
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. that Fair, fair, fair thought, right? Like if the Pope says do things one way, you say the Pope is wrong. I think that's not a fair representation of Catholicism. However,
01:11:52
Speaker
Mark Randall, the chairman of the National Catholic Prayer Breakfast, thought J.D. Vance was the perfect representation of Catholicism, as he's going to be welcomed back as vice president as a sign of fellowship and prayer to all Catholics so we could share in this moment together.
01:12:11
Speaker
I am fucking disgusted. Disgusted. I went back to the Catholic Church because it has provided me a sense of peace and that I was missing.
01:12:24
Speaker
And the message is nothing that J.D. Vance ever talks about. My my priest is, you know an immigrant to this country, and I think he understands what's going on more than some other people, and he gives wonderful insight on a week-in and wait week-out basis.
01:12:40
Speaker
Why are we not inviting people like that? Why are we inviting someone who is literally engulfed in an argument over border walls with the fucking Pope?
01:12:52
Speaker
Like, I'm sorry. That kind of should be like when you're it being interviewed for the opportunity, like, Hey, we've got six candidates. We're trying to figure out who the best person invite is.
01:13:03
Speaker
You know, we're going to run through some questions. Hey, these are, these are stupid. Everybody gets asked these, you know, please answer honestly. Number one, have you ever had an argument with the Pope? Oh yes.
01:13:14
Speaker
Wow. Okay. First person to answer head yes to that one. I'm sorry, Mr. Vance. We're going to have to move on. Like, What the fuck, man? like ah You are the National Catholic Register. like The National Catholic Prayer Breakfast.
01:13:29
Speaker
At some point, Catholic has to come first. That's what matters. Not America. Catholic. We are a worldwide movement. We are a worldwide religion.
01:13:43
Speaker
Our leader is not the President of the United States morally and spiritually. That is the Pope. And if you cannot understand that, then you're not a Catholic.
01:13:54
Speaker
You're a Christian nationalist. Well, I was going to say the two things that hit hit me in advance. Number one, yeah is what he was disagreeing with the Pope on is basic theology, which is where he came he came as Christian nationalist. The first thing we got to think about is ourselves, then our families, then our country.
01:14:19
Speaker
then, you know, maybe if we have a little bit left over, we can, you know, help the other people. Trying to define love thy neighbor to the Pope. And so here's here's my thing, right?
01:14:32
Speaker
I am sure you're with me on this. I don't necessarily agree with the church's stances on things 100% of the time. Would you agree with that?
01:14:43
Speaker
I don't agree with the church's stances. on several things, right? Like I'm, I'm, right relation in I'm, I, I couldn't wait till marriage to have sex. Like I, uh, there are plenty of things that I think they're over the top about.
01:14:59
Speaker
I'm, you know, some of those I'm, I'm okay. Yeah. Okay. That's fine. But you know, some of those I'm like, no, let's see, here's the thing. Here's where Vance messed up. And here's the second point.
01:15:11
Speaker
Am I going to argue scripture with the Pope?
01:15:18
Speaker
which is basically what Vance did. Well, the Pope was wrong on scripture. Really? Let's see. How many years did he go to seminary, JD?
01:15:32
Speaker
You're a guy that went to Yale Law and you don't even know how the constitution works. So, you know, I don't know how many years you went to c seminary. I think he's a convert to Catholicism.
01:15:43
Speaker
He is. Which isn't everything. I love, you know, people who... and And I and have a guy in who's a big fan of ours, at least our sub stack, who I'm going to sponsor, who's going through the CIA.
01:15:57
Speaker
So i have a yeah ah respect for converts. However, that respect kind of ends when you start to tell me about my faith and about how wrong I am about my faith.
01:16:12
Speaker
Because how many years have I been teaching converts? catechist them? I mean, I was 15, so at least 20, right?
01:16:24
Speaker
At least 20, and I was teaching before you went through. So, I'm sorry. But even me, teaching catechist for 20 years, I'm not going to argue with the Pope over Scripture.
01:16:39
Speaker
The man is clearly an expert. Now, are there people in the world that know more about Scripture than the Pope? Maybe. But can't imagine there are very many of those.
01:16:54
Speaker
I don't think so. I don't think so. You know, I just I think like I wrote about it in a previous article. The smartest people in the world know what they don't know, and they want to surround themselves with people who know those things so they can learn more.
01:17:09
Speaker
The dumbest people in the world are experts on everything.
Spiritual Guidance and Personal Reflection
01:17:12
Speaker
They don't need you to tell them anything. And if you don't need some spiritual guidance from the Pope, you're a fucking idiot, right? Like if you're a spiritual person, at least like, and you are Catholic, like I gotta say, if, if I going through some of the struggles I've been going through with dealing with this world, if the Pope reached out to me and said, Tim, I heard you've been struggling.
01:17:38
Speaker
I'd love to offer you some spiritual guidance. You're unbelievably touched and honored. and ah Absolutely. Yes. Thank you. Same way, right? it wouldn't be like ru It wouldn't be like, I don't know. like I don't know if what you have is what I'm looking for. right like Are you okay with me kicking out a bunch of people first? like I feel like I want to love my neighbor who's in my gated neighborhood of white people. I love that guy. right I love that neighbor. He's nice.
01:18:06
Speaker
But like the other people, not so much. Can we still be friends, Pope? like No. That's not how it works.
Wrapping Up and Future Topics
01:18:13
Speaker
No. All right, Scott. I think that's going to do it this week.
01:18:18
Speaker
Okie dokie. We fast, we came hard. We did. Hopefully we'll have some more news to talk about next week. Hey, this this time of year, like I said earlier, it' you know no legitimate sports. I take that back, right? But at the end of day you and I are baseball guys.
01:18:33
Speaker
like through and through baseball will always be number one. And this is just that time of year where there's just that lull, right? Like you had the off season where there's just so much, what could be, let's talk about this day. Let's talk about that name.
01:18:45
Speaker
But now it's like that first week of spring training where it's like, no one's really playing yet. We're getting a lot of, look we're getting a lot of looks at guys who we shouldn't get too amped up about because we're not going to see them this year, even though they look good, you know? And so it it is, it does take us down some paths that, uh,
01:19:03
Speaker
Maybe a full throne of games wouldn't allow us to go down. Rick Vaughn? Willie Hayes? Mitchell Friedman? Who the fuck are these guys?
01:19:14
Speaker
What
01:19:17
Speaker
league did you play in last year? California Penal. How'd you get there? Stole a car. god Yeah, you know what? i do You're right on the one-liners, man.
01:19:28
Speaker
You're right. it'ss It's full of just... I've been listening lot of Mitch Hedberg lately for the one-liners, so maybe it's time for a revisit Major League. Was he the guy that came up with the I've got an answering machine on my car phone?
01:19:41
Speaker
Says I'm at home right now.
01:19:46
Speaker
Classics. right, buddy. That's going to it here for us this week. We appreciate everybody who joined us. We'll see you next week on Born on the Bayou Sports.